WEBVTT

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Hello, everybody. Welcome back to That's Life

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podcast. I'm your host, Abbey Luckett. And life

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has a lot of highs, a lot of lows, and many in

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-betweens. But the thing that remains consistent

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is our God. So let's see what we talk about today.

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The meaning of life. This is what time and time

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again philosophers and theologians, Thessalonians,

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and Biblians. What are Thessalonians? Barbarians.

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All of the ins the eons encyclopedia lens and

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scientists Are you cutting me off of my intro?

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These women and men It's my podcast, okay, sorry

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jokes, I'm not mean to my husband This is what

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all of these eons insert blank eons wonder time

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and time and again the meaning of life the meaning

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of life Life. L -I -F -E. Four letters, one word.

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And today, we're gonna talk about that word applying

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to us, meaning our lives. Because today, we're

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just gonna sit and chat about what has been going

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on in our L -I -V -E -S. Not L -I -F -E -F -S.

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Life -ifs. What is happening? I've been doing

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this show for five plus years, I'm running out

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of hooks, okay? I'm trying to get creative here.

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I'm trying to put my best foot forward. And I

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just like, I get really overwhelmed and like,

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oh. Okay, okay, okay. Stop. Did I freak you out?

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Did you believe me? Yeah, you're freaking me

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out. No, I didn't believe you, I just wanted

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to get over that. It was my theater kid showing.

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Yeah. My theater kid coming out. Hey, what's

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your name? Tell if there's anyone new tell them

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who you are Ryan and in five describe yourself

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in five words. Oh, I like that Okay, I have to

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describe myself in five words. I don't like describing

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myself for like Can I describe you in five words

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you describe me in five words? Okay, King. Okay

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go first King? Um, Highness King master. I'm

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just kidding No, okay my words like we're doing

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like adjectives traits. Yeah qualities about

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each other. What else would you use? Like physical

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I was thinking maybe like physical features or

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like huge or like sporty or like whatever Or

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like fuzzy face, you know things like that. I

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am growing my beard out you guys. I don't know

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What is a five o 'clock shadow? Is that what

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that is? My facial hair right now? Yeah. I don't

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know if this qualifies as a five o 'clock shadow.

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This probably qualifies as like scruff. Well,

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anyways, OK, five words I would use to describe

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you. I can't do it in five words. OK, man after

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God's own heart. Wait, what? I can't. I can't

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do it all in one. Man after God's own heart is

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literally five words. Okay. Okay, chill. Man

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after, okay. No, no, you can't use that. God

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chaser. Nope, that's two words. Oh, I can't do

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this. This is too hard for me. Okay. I need to

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fix the mic level, so pause. Five words I would

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use to describe my loving husband are as follows.

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Abby is really playing this out because she can't

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think of any. You want me to go first? Yeah,

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I can't think. All right. I'll describe you in

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five words. Okay. Bubbly. That's a sweet one.

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Creative. Thank you. Fun. I like that one. Beautiful.

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Thank you. And. Driven. Why were you laughing?

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I was gonna say a lot. Okay. Which I feel like

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is... Driven's a good... Driven's a good one.

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Yeah. All right. For you, I'm going patient.

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You're patient. I would say relaxed. I think

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you're just very chill. Maybe chill. Patient,

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chill. Too chill, you thought. Fashionable. Hey,

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let's go. That's big. You are... Can I use creative

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for you too? Sure. Creative and kind -hearted.

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That's two words. Hearted. Could you say kind?

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You are hearted. Kind? I hearted you. Okay. That's

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all I'd say about that. Okay, so I'm gonna bring

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this up You don't know that I'm throwing this

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at you, but you have been on this new kick of

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eliminating like convenience and Efficiency Ryan

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has been like irking at the word efficiency Like

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I was I literally the other day was like let's

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do this this way so that it's more efficient

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and he went I thought you were making like I

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thought you were making fun of me for my Instagram

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post That's why I irked. What? Instagram post.

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I'm really loud now. Oh my gosh, I'm yelling.

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I can't get these levels right on the mic. Oh

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my gosh, listen. We do this every single week.

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Okay. No, I'm saying like you would think it

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would just be the same. Like we didn't have to

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mess with it. I know, but I just, listen, we're

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a two person, we're a two person operation here.

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Not a lot of brain. And so it's just, okay. Okay.

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Hello? All right. We're good. We're good. Okay.

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Are we good? Just keep it there. Can you just

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say, like, hello, my wife is so beautiful. Hello,

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my wife is so hot. No, but say it while I'm not

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speaking. Hello, my wife is so hot. Okay, why'd

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you say hot? I said beautiful. Say it again.

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Hello, my wife is so sexy. No, wait till I stop

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speaking and then say it, go. Hello, my wife

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is so, so, so, so sexy. Okay, okay. Say it one

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more time. Hello, my wife is so beautiful. All

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right, all right, all right, all right. I just

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have to turn this camera away because, what?

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Why'd you say bro? I don't know. Why'd you say

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bro? I'm turning this computer away so that I

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don't, okay. Let me explain to the people that

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are either watching or listening. So our setup

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here, we're in front of a Murphy bed that is

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our guest bedroom in our apartment, okay? We

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have the chairs, we have a light. Awesome. To

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my, I don't even know if you can see it. in the

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video but to my left of where I'm sitting I have

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our computer which is where all the sound goes

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for our podcast. So every week I sit there and

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like look at the levels and I'll like make sure

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that Ryan's mic matches my mic and that we're

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like his mic isn't super quiet and I'm super

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loud and yada yada yada. Every single time without

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fail I have to adjust the sound. It's just not

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a gift. It's not a gift of mine. Well I was gonna

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I was even gonna say people watching, obviously

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our setup is not some amazing thing. It may look

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more glorious than it actually appears to be.

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Abby and I really don't know what we're doing,

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especially for podcast -wise. In a perfect world,

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we would just have somebody help us set up an

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actual podcast setup, but funds aren't super

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high around here. We can't just pay somebody.

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No, we're fine, but... Well, I know, but I'm

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just saying, like, we can't just pay somebody

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to, like, give us this, like, all class podcast

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setup. So we set, we have a very nice camera

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and we set up the camera on a tripod, tripod,

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tripod, and we. have these two green chairs and

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we sit in them and we just talk in front of it.

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It's not like we have multiple camera angles

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like a lot of other podcasts. But you know what?

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We're not like other podcasts. Yeah, we're not

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like most people. And like, it's not about the

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setup, it's about the heart. Yeah, there you

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go. And as for me, my house will serve the Lord.

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And in this house, we laugh hard and we cry big.

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And we forgive often. And we hug deeply. Very

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deeply. So, efficiency. Well, the reason why

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I thought you were, why I irked at you like that,

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I thought you were making fun of me because I

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had a post about like AI and stuff. Oh. Did you

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see that on my story? I started watching it and

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then I skipped it. Watch it? That's crazy work.

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I skipped it. I'm sorry. I can't even get support

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from my wife. Okay, you can't say anything. I

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have... time and time again, heard my voice coming

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from your phone. And then I hear it. Hello, everybody.

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Because you scroll. I usually watch you make

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the video in real time. OK, but this specific

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one, you didn't. I would know I was sitting at

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the corner of our house and you were out on a

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run and I made the video because I was like,

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hey, guys, blah, blah, blah. And all I hear when

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you come from your phone, you're sitting there.

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Hey, guys. So. Yeah, I try and watch them all

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the way through a lot of times Bro, are you just

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are you just pulling the fib card? We are together

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all the time. Sometimes I need a little bit more

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diversification in my podcast. Diversification?

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Is that a real word? Diversity? I know but diversify

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there's diversification. I don't think that's

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a word I don't think that's a word. Abby and

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I are about to do a spelling bee, and is my husband

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smarter than a fifth grader soon? Okay, let's

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practice now, and then we'll circle back to efficiency.

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Okay. But we don't need to be efficient right

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now, so we can just talk. Yeah, yeah. All right,

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spell the word dictionary. Okay, dictionary.

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Can you use it in a sentence for me? Are you

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for real? Yes. I looked up this word in a dictionary.

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Origin, please. My mouth. No, no, no. Country

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of origin, please. Is that Latin? It's from the

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Hebrew Bible. All right. Dictionary. D -I -C

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-T -I -O -N -A -R -Y. Dictionary. Ding, ding,

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ding, ding, ding. I'm actually a pretty good

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speller. Macaroni. This is kind of tough. M -A

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-C Mac. O. No. Ah! Wait, it's not O? Macaroni?

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Mac? Mac? E? Is it E? Macaroni. Is it just R?

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Macaroni. M -A -C -C? Macaroni. Are you being

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for real? Wait, what? Macaroni. Are you being

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for real? M -A -C -O. No! What? What is it? You

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don't say Macaroni. How do you say Macaroni?

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Macaroni. Macaroni. Uh? Mac, uh, yeah. It's not

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you. No. Mac, uh. It's an A. Is it? Oh, it is

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an A. Yeah, it is an A. Okay. See, this is why

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this video is going to be great. Maybe I'm not

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the best. That's actually crazy. Yeah, it's tough.

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You said, is it just a R? I will say it. Macaroni?

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I don't ever claim to be smart. Like, I can talk.

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I have socialist skills, but I do not have book

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smarts. You know what it is about you? Even on

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like a fourth grade level. You know what it is

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about you? What? I saw this video a lot. I saw

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this video coming across my free page and The

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caption like the overlay at the top was your

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friend. That's not very smart But then they've

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got so much wisdom and so it was this guy and

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he was like six seven six seven six seven and

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then all of a sudden it cuts to this clip and

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he's like and in James chapter 1 verse 5 Jesus

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is talking about And I was like that is my husband

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and it's not that I I think you're smart. Okay,

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I'm not a six seven guy though Give me that Ryan.

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It was just an example. Yeah. I know Okay, okay,

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okay, I mean Going oh to then I spell dictionary,

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right? I spell dictionary, right to go going

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from oh, I didn't get the option being e you

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R double C. That's tough. It's tough. That's,

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that's what got me. Here's the thing though,

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is you were going to keep going on things I spell

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until I got something wrong. Okay, do me. I don't

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really think I'm that good of a speller. Okay.

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Efficiency. E F F. Well, the problem is, is I

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don't even know if you'll spell it right or not.

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So. I think it's E F F I. E. C. No, C. Yeah,

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C. E, F, F, I, C, I, E, N. Yeah, it's something.

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It's one of the EIs or IEs. CY? No, T, CY? No,

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there's no T in efficiency. There's no T. There

00:13:26.679 --> 00:13:30.139
is no T. N, CY, yeah. Efficient is with a T.

00:13:30.460 --> 00:13:32.799
Yeah. No, you know what's harder is if I could

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write it out. I would do it right. I can't do

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it in my head. I can't keep track of the letters.

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So in my spelling bee, though, will I have like

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pen and paper where I can, you know, kind of

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practice? No. See, that's where I just don't

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know if that's fair. It's how have you ever seen

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an actual spelling bee? No, they used to put

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them on TV, though. And they go up to the mic

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and they just say it from their head. But but

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you can't ask definition, use it in a sentence

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and origin. And I didn't get the origin. Oh,

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because that would have changed it. Where is

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macaroni from? Macaroni. Macaroni. It feels like

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Italy, right? Macaroni is like an Italian dish,

00:14:16.440 --> 00:14:20.919
right? I don't know. It's like a noodle with

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cheese. That seems very Italy. I feel like we've

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Americanized it though. Craft with a K. We had

00:14:26.639 --> 00:14:29.399
some macaroni the other night. Okay. Can we circle

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back to the efficiency? Yeah, yeah. I love that.

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Okay. Efficiency. Where did you get on this?

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Because this has been the talk of our house for

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the past week. It's like, I am done with being

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efficient. I'm done with being convenient. I'm

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done with. No, it's not that I'm done with it.

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I don't, I don't want people to think that I'm

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just like over, like I hate efficiency and don't

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like getting things done. I love getting things

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done and we get a lot done during the week, but.

00:14:56.840 --> 00:14:59.879
So the reason I brought even started on that

00:14:59.879 --> 00:15:02.100
was because I read a really ruthless elimination

00:15:02.100 --> 00:15:05.139
of hurry again by John Mark Homer Yeah, who's

00:15:05.139 --> 00:15:07.679
it's just a really good book and he goes into

00:15:07.679 --> 00:15:13.600
deep detail of how The world is in such a rush

00:15:13.600 --> 00:15:15.980
to get to the next thing to make the next dollar

00:15:15.980 --> 00:15:19.279
to go to the next place or We're not even in

00:15:19.279 --> 00:15:21.039
the moment that we're living in because we're

00:15:21.039 --> 00:15:24.179
either A on our phones or whatever the case may

00:15:24.179 --> 00:15:27.120
be. It's a great book. It is a really good book

00:15:27.120 --> 00:15:31.080
and one of the huge takeaways that at least for

00:15:31.080 --> 00:15:36.740
me was like I feel like the world at least especially

00:15:36.740 --> 00:15:39.840
as I relate to it is I'm just trying to get as

00:15:39.840 --> 00:15:42.159
efficient as possible so that I can get more

00:15:42.159 --> 00:15:45.000
and more and more done so that and what that

00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:48.990
does is puts even more things on your plate during

00:15:48.990 --> 00:15:51.889
the day because I can get this much done think

00:15:51.889 --> 00:15:53.710
about how much like if I can get even more efficient

00:15:53.710 --> 00:15:56.049
on these things I can stack more things onto

00:15:56.049 --> 00:15:59.889
me and one thing I had been noticing with you

00:15:59.889 --> 00:16:02.730
is that you were just so exhausted at the end

00:16:02.730 --> 00:16:06.110
of the day yeah and Abby's days were like planned

00:16:06.110 --> 00:16:09.330
out to a tee in that case which mine were as

00:16:09.330 --> 00:16:13.250
well because we work together so like and mine

00:16:13.250 --> 00:16:16.809
not as much but Yours, you really like because

00:16:16.809 --> 00:16:18.590
what is that type A or type B? I don't know.

00:16:18.590 --> 00:16:22.389
I'm very type A. Yeah. And so, and I am not right.

00:16:22.409 --> 00:16:25.250
But I also have to write things out or else it'll

00:16:25.250 --> 00:16:28.169
just swirl in my brain. I know. And that's why

00:16:28.169 --> 00:16:30.129
I mean like there is a point to it where it's

00:16:30.129 --> 00:16:32.450
really good to be efficient and have a routine

00:16:32.450 --> 00:16:35.370
and things. But I think Abby made a really good

00:16:35.370 --> 00:16:37.970
point. We were talking about it over dinner yesterday

00:16:37.970 --> 00:16:40.389
or lunch yesterday at True Food. And she was

00:16:40.389 --> 00:16:43.269
saying like it becomes a problem when you become

00:16:43.269 --> 00:16:45.950
a slave to it. like a slave to your schedule

00:16:45.950 --> 00:16:49.490
or a slave to your routine and my biggest thing

00:16:49.490 --> 00:16:52.309
is like I don't want to go through life just

00:16:52.309 --> 00:16:56.330
trying to get as much done so that I can earn

00:16:56.330 --> 00:16:59.629
as much money so that I can just like fill my

00:16:59.629 --> 00:17:03.169
life with things that revolve around work or

00:17:03.169 --> 00:17:06.230
whatever and I don't just slow down long enough

00:17:06.230 --> 00:17:09.230
to like enjoy a long conversation that might

00:17:09.230 --> 00:17:14.039
go over time quote -unquote or Like I was telling

00:17:14.039 --> 00:17:17.779
Abby yesterday is like some of my favorite memories

00:17:17.779 --> 00:17:20.599
growing up or like staying up super late and

00:17:20.599 --> 00:17:23.319
like just super long Conversations that you didn't

00:17:23.319 --> 00:17:25.339
you didn't even know what time it was and it's

00:17:25.339 --> 00:17:27.660
like, oh, it's 2 a .m And you've been talking

00:17:27.660 --> 00:17:29.880
to that person for that long and I feel like

00:17:29.880 --> 00:17:32.319
we've lost that, you know I feel like it's funny

00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:35.619
you say that specific example because I feel

00:17:35.619 --> 00:17:39.700
like in today's day with this is just a specific

00:17:39.700 --> 00:17:44.529
like subsection of efficiency and you know getting

00:17:44.529 --> 00:17:46.970
everything out of every moment and maximizing

00:17:46.970 --> 00:17:52.089
your time but especially in the fitness space

00:17:52.089 --> 00:17:55.769
my brain goes to like oh but I have to get this

00:17:55.769 --> 00:17:58.230
amount of sleep or else it's gonna or else I'm

00:17:58.230 --> 00:18:00.230
not gonna feel good the next day and I have to

00:18:00.230 --> 00:18:02.869
do this routine and I have to do this thing then

00:18:02.869 --> 00:18:04.809
this thing and this thing like my brain just

00:18:04.809 --> 00:18:07.390
went like you know people that like oh I have

00:18:07.390 --> 00:18:09.970
to sauna then cold plums and shower then eat

00:18:09.970 --> 00:18:12.329
this specific meal with these specific macros

00:18:12.329 --> 00:18:15.309
and this for this specific diet then I have to

00:18:15.309 --> 00:18:18.470
put on my Mouth tape my nose strips and my face

00:18:18.470 --> 00:18:22.690
mask and then get in my whatever. It's like We

00:18:22.690 --> 00:18:26.009
have become all of these things are great like

00:18:26.009 --> 00:18:29.869
I Love that people can just go do red light therapy

00:18:29.869 --> 00:18:31.849
or all these things and this is kind of just

00:18:31.849 --> 00:18:33.950
our world of fitness But that's where my brain

00:18:33.950 --> 00:18:36.390
went when you said like staying up late with

00:18:36.390 --> 00:18:41.750
your friends, we, me in this category as well,

00:18:41.950 --> 00:18:48.690
become so accustomed to the routine of consuming

00:18:48.690 --> 00:18:55.769
and being optimal as ourselves that sometimes

00:18:55.769 --> 00:18:59.609
it's at the detriment of sacrificing what really

00:18:59.609 --> 00:19:02.990
matters in this life which is community, people.

00:19:04.069 --> 00:19:07.609
memory making memories and I bring that up because

00:19:07.609 --> 00:19:11.069
on paper if you're like would you rather stay

00:19:11.069 --> 00:19:14.349
up till 2 a .m. Talking with your friends Unplanned

00:19:14.349 --> 00:19:17.029
or do your same routine that you do every night.

00:19:17.289 --> 00:19:19.630
Well, I'd rather hang out with my friends. Yeah,

00:19:19.690 --> 00:19:22.450
but when you're in the moment Clikes clock strikes

00:19:22.450 --> 00:19:25.349
10 o 'clock and you're in the middle of a conversation

00:19:25.349 --> 00:19:27.769
My brain automatically goes I got to get home

00:19:27.769 --> 00:19:28.950
because I have to do all my stuff because I have

00:19:28.950 --> 00:19:30.549
to do this and this and this and this and this

00:19:30.549 --> 00:19:33.230
You go to the next day to like it's like oh I

00:19:33.230 --> 00:19:36.369
have this in the morning so I gotta and I just

00:19:36.369 --> 00:19:38.369
don't think that's a way to live I don't either

00:19:38.369 --> 00:19:43.130
but I am still and I'm still there and I'm trying

00:19:43.130 --> 00:19:44.869
to fight against we're doing really we've been

00:19:44.869 --> 00:19:48.569
doing a lot better I feel like because the some

00:19:48.569 --> 00:19:52.410
of so In the book, John Mark Comer writes out

00:19:52.410 --> 00:19:57.049
like 20 rules that he follows in life to like

00:19:57.049 --> 00:20:00.910
slow down, be in the moment, be present, and

00:20:00.910 --> 00:20:03.390
not like feel like he's constantly in a rush

00:20:03.390 --> 00:20:05.950
and not in a hurry. And like some of them Abby

00:20:05.950 --> 00:20:08.509
and I have been trying to do like drive the speed

00:20:08.509 --> 00:20:10.609
limit, drive the speed limit, stop at every stop

00:20:10.609 --> 00:20:13.049
sign like all the way, no phone at all while

00:20:13.049 --> 00:20:16.289
you're in the car. What are some other ones that

00:20:16.289 --> 00:20:20.460
we've been trying? Oh, Sabbath. Like that's a

00:20:20.460 --> 00:20:23.720
big one full no work and what basically whatever

00:20:23.720 --> 00:20:26.180
we're doing that is what we're doing Yeah, so

00:20:26.180 --> 00:20:28.799
if you're watching a show your phone is gone.

00:20:28.839 --> 00:20:30.799
Yeah, or if you're eating dinner, you're eating

00:20:30.799 --> 00:20:33.099
dinner Yeah, well, that's another thing. We've

00:20:33.099 --> 00:20:37.720
been trying to do is eat dinners and like actually

00:20:37.720 --> 00:20:42.609
have the meal together in communion and like

00:20:42.609 --> 00:20:45.730
fellowship and like laughter and telling stories

00:20:45.730 --> 00:20:48.609
and Asking about each other's day and what was

00:20:48.609 --> 00:20:51.309
good and what was bad or even just in silence

00:20:51.309 --> 00:20:54.589
Yeah, like I don't really operate in silence

00:20:54.589 --> 00:20:58.809
much. I mean we don't but there was one time

00:20:58.809 --> 00:21:01.630
where we were Sitting on the couch and we kind

00:21:01.630 --> 00:21:04.309
of just like sat there and ate. Yeah. Yeah, but

00:21:04.309 --> 00:21:11.400
just saying like it It's just so special to have

00:21:11.400 --> 00:21:18.119
this life. This life is very special. Yes, everything's

00:21:18.119 --> 00:21:20.539
meaningless. Go look in Ecclesiastes. All this

00:21:20.539 --> 00:21:23.380
is meaningless. But our time on Earth is also

00:21:23.380 --> 00:21:25.579
a gift. It's just a gift from God. There are

00:21:25.579 --> 00:21:28.180
some things that Solomon said though that is

00:21:28.180 --> 00:21:32.579
good, right? Eating and drinking with... Exactly.

00:21:32.680 --> 00:21:36.019
That's what I'm saying is that the things of

00:21:36.019 --> 00:21:39.609
the world that equate to success... meaningless

00:21:39.609 --> 00:21:43.269
yeah but that doesn't mean that we block out

00:21:43.269 --> 00:21:44.750
everything i was gonna say i don't want to sound

00:21:44.750 --> 00:21:47.549
hypocritical but like because we do work really

00:21:47.549 --> 00:21:49.849
hard and we care about you know what we do and

00:21:49.849 --> 00:21:54.369
everything um so we're not here to say we've

00:21:54.369 --> 00:21:57.869
just like are giving everything up and living

00:21:57.869 --> 00:22:00.789
on it in a beach town that's not what we mean

00:22:00.789 --> 00:22:03.789
when we mean being in no hurry like you can get

00:22:03.789 --> 00:22:05.529
yeah i didn't take it that way i know i'm just

00:22:05.529 --> 00:22:08.640
i'm just people may have, I'm not saying you

00:22:08.640 --> 00:22:15.000
did, I'm saying other people could. Like, rest

00:22:15.000 --> 00:22:21.140
and solitude and silence and slowing down, like

00:22:21.140 --> 00:22:23.299
those kind of words of like not being in a hurry

00:22:23.299 --> 00:22:27.200
or whatever, doesn't mean you just like sit on

00:22:27.200 --> 00:22:30.380
the couch all day and nap and just like don't

00:22:30.380 --> 00:22:32.680
do anything. Because I feel like that's what

00:22:32.680 --> 00:22:35.299
people think of. And it's like, well, that seems

00:22:35.299 --> 00:22:37.960
really boring. It's like, no, what it really

00:22:37.960 --> 00:22:42.019
means is like, yes, you need to spend time in

00:22:42.019 --> 00:22:48.680
your day. No screen, no technology with the word

00:22:48.680 --> 00:22:52.240
of God, with God, praying, meditate in silence

00:22:52.240 --> 00:22:56.420
with your own thoughts. And I swear, like he

00:22:56.420 --> 00:22:58.339
talks about this in his book, too, but it's like

00:22:58.339 --> 00:23:00.839
you're recalibrating yourself when that happens.

00:23:01.039 --> 00:23:04.880
It's what it feels like. and you feel like a

00:23:04.880 --> 00:23:07.779
sense of just like coming back to the moment.

00:23:08.559 --> 00:23:12.140
And it's been really fun to like try that out.

00:23:12.420 --> 00:23:15.680
And I've I've really taken a lot from it. Just

00:23:15.680 --> 00:23:19.579
like the way we walk around, like when we go

00:23:19.579 --> 00:23:23.839
on walks, we've just slowed down. Like, you know,

00:23:23.920 --> 00:23:26.599
sometimes like we would go on walks and we would

00:23:26.599 --> 00:23:30.470
be cooking. And now we've or at least I mean

00:23:30.470 --> 00:23:33.970
I have on my own walks and stuff just like Chill

00:23:33.970 --> 00:23:36.349
like you don't have to you're not going anywhere.

00:23:36.349 --> 00:23:38.789
Like what are you trying to get to the next thing?

00:23:39.410 --> 00:23:42.369
I don't know. Just my thoughts recently. I think

00:23:42.369 --> 00:23:45.670
well I want to stay on the the point of Sabbath

00:23:45.670 --> 00:23:49.730
because we had like a really really nice Sabbath

00:23:49.730 --> 00:23:53.849
for those of you that don't know like long story

00:23:53.849 --> 00:23:58.329
short Sabbath has been around since the beginning

00:23:58.329 --> 00:24:01.309
of time. And the Bible tells us to honor the

00:24:01.309 --> 00:24:04.029
Sabbath day and keep it holy. So basically a

00:24:04.029 --> 00:24:05.329
rest day. I mean, you're resting, you're not

00:24:05.329 --> 00:24:08.309
supposed to work, whatever. And then Jesus came

00:24:08.309 --> 00:24:10.789
and did work on Sabbath. And then all the Pharisees

00:24:10.789 --> 00:24:12.690
were like, what the heck, you're working on the

00:24:12.690 --> 00:24:14.809
Sabbath. Like, what does that even mean? And

00:24:14.809 --> 00:24:17.089
it kind of just painted this picture of like...

00:24:16.700 --> 00:24:19.599
Sabbath is about heart posture essentially like

00:24:19.599 --> 00:24:22.240
Jesus was like well if one of your sheep was

00:24:22.240 --> 00:24:24.319
injured would you not or if one of your sheep

00:24:24.319 --> 00:24:26.700
fell in a well would you not work hard like on

00:24:26.700 --> 00:24:28.339
the Sabbath day would you not work hard to pull

00:24:28.339 --> 00:24:29.740
your sheep out of the well basically is what

00:24:29.740 --> 00:24:32.240
he's saying and so it just paints this picture

00:24:32.240 --> 00:24:37.039
of Sabbath being about heart posture and I Started

00:24:37.039 --> 00:24:40.240
learning what Sabbath was when I was in college

00:24:40.240 --> 00:24:42.480
because I just thought Sabbath equaled like a

00:24:42.480 --> 00:24:45.809
rest day So like I'm not working out But then

00:24:45.809 --> 00:24:48.670
I started getting so burned out and I would just

00:24:48.670 --> 00:24:51.329
crash and burn I was like why like I'm giving

00:24:51.329 --> 00:24:53.390
myself a rest day each week, but I wasn't like

00:24:53.390 --> 00:24:55.190
I was still working I was still getting up early

00:24:55.190 --> 00:24:58.069
I was still doing everything but calling it Sabbath

00:24:58.069 --> 00:25:01.849
because I wasn't working out and so I Really

00:25:01.849 --> 00:25:05.210
worked hard on what true Sabbath meant and in

00:25:05.210 --> 00:25:08.450
my abbey words not in scripture words, but in

00:25:08.450 --> 00:25:12.950
abbey words how I would describe a true Sabbath

00:25:12.950 --> 00:25:19.579
day would be When you tell yourself, oh, I wish

00:25:19.579 --> 00:25:22.099
I had a day where I just could just relax and

00:25:22.099 --> 00:25:25.440
not do anything. It's that day. That's that day.

00:25:25.940 --> 00:25:30.480
So for me, that means waking up with no plans,

00:25:31.119 --> 00:25:34.180
waking up. Sometimes I'll set my alarm and wake

00:25:34.180 --> 00:25:36.000
up early so that I could read my Bible at sunrise

00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:39.099
because I love that. Sometimes I'll sleep in

00:25:39.099 --> 00:25:41.460
because I love that too. If I want to take a

00:25:41.460 --> 00:25:43.500
nap, I'll take a nap. If I want to bake, I'll

00:25:43.500 --> 00:25:45.160
bake. If we want to go on a walk, we'll go on

00:25:45.160 --> 00:25:49.200
a walk. But it's for me having an unplanned today

00:25:49.200 --> 00:25:54.339
because my brain doesn't have to like think.

00:25:54.359 --> 00:25:58.380
And I just feel so rested and connected because

00:25:58.380 --> 00:26:02.319
if I even try to plan something that seems restful

00:26:02.319 --> 00:26:05.200
on Sabbath, like if I plan like, oh, I'm going

00:26:05.200 --> 00:26:07.240
to go lay out in the sun for an hour the night

00:26:07.240 --> 00:26:09.480
before. then my brain all day is going, well,

00:26:09.480 --> 00:26:11.140
I have to do this at this hour because I said

00:26:11.140 --> 00:26:13.480
I was going to do it. And then it takes away

00:26:13.480 --> 00:26:17.019
the true Sabbath because I'm like, oh, well,

00:26:17.019 --> 00:26:19.099
I have this plan. Does that make sense? Yeah,

00:26:19.099 --> 00:26:21.500
for sure. But that's just how my brain works.

00:26:21.759 --> 00:26:24.480
And that's what I've figured out for myself is

00:26:24.480 --> 00:26:27.380
that like in order to fully reset and recalibrate,

00:26:27.460 --> 00:26:29.859
like you were saying, I have to go into it. No

00:26:29.859 --> 00:26:32.299
plan. So that's why we choose to do it on a Saturday

00:26:32.299 --> 00:26:35.680
instead of a Sunday, because Saturdays we have

00:26:35.680 --> 00:26:37.819
nothing. Absolutely nothing. Yeah, unless we're

00:26:37.819 --> 00:26:39.920
like traveling or something. Yeah. And Sunday

00:26:39.920 --> 00:26:43.359
is obviously a holy day, too. But it's a it's

00:26:43.359 --> 00:26:45.500
for me. It's like, oh, well, I have to be somewhere

00:26:45.500 --> 00:26:48.079
at some time. So my brain just doesn't fully

00:26:48.079 --> 00:26:51.140
kind of rest. Yeah. And we work on Sundays. Yeah.

00:26:51.720 --> 00:26:54.099
So like there's that, too. Yeah. But I just thought

00:26:54.099 --> 00:26:56.980
I just think that whole conversation is very

00:26:56.980 --> 00:27:00.039
interesting and very against the world. Like

00:27:00.039 --> 00:27:01.480
when you were telling me what you were reading

00:27:01.480 --> 00:27:04.319
in the book about. Slowing down and all this

00:27:04.319 --> 00:27:07.640
stuff my immediate thought and it kind of shocked

00:27:07.640 --> 00:27:09.319
me that I should probably read the book again

00:27:09.319 --> 00:27:13.799
was Well, if I slow down then I'm gonna get behind

00:27:13.799 --> 00:27:15.740
Yeah, I'm not gonna keep up with the rest of

00:27:15.740 --> 00:27:18.539
the world and then we're gonna fail. That was

00:27:18.539 --> 00:27:23.380
my brain. Yeah and I I don't want to say I preach

00:27:23.380 --> 00:27:26.880
because I try not to like put myself in a category

00:27:26.880 --> 00:27:32.079
where I don't feel I don't say qualified but

00:27:31.960 --> 00:27:33.940
I'm not a preacher, so I don't want to try to

00:27:33.940 --> 00:27:36.400
act like a preacher. But for the lack of - Yeah,

00:27:36.400 --> 00:27:38.200
same here, bro. I can't even spell efficiency.

00:27:38.259 --> 00:27:40.000
But for a lack of better - Or whatever word it

00:27:40.000 --> 00:27:41.900
was. For a lack of better words, I preach all

00:27:41.900 --> 00:27:46.039
the time or I talk about all the time that success

00:27:46.039 --> 00:27:51.839
is relative and subjective. You're like this.

00:27:51.859 --> 00:27:54.819
Thank you. I'm getting on my soapbox. But I preach

00:27:54.819 --> 00:28:00.980
all the time that success is relative and subjective.

00:28:01.400 --> 00:28:03.619
Because how would you define success is going

00:28:03.619 --> 00:28:07.279
to be different for lots of people. But success

00:28:07.279 --> 00:28:10.259
of this world, if you're just striving for that

00:28:10.259 --> 00:28:11.900
and serving for that, then you're not serving

00:28:11.900 --> 00:28:16.319
God. You can't serve two masters. That's when

00:28:16.319 --> 00:28:20.539
it clocked for me, who is your master? Because

00:28:20.539 --> 00:28:23.259
if you're telling yourself, I'm going to fall

00:28:23.259 --> 00:28:25.799
behind and then I'm going to be a failure. I

00:28:25.799 --> 00:28:28.440
won't be successful. That's not what God says

00:28:28.440 --> 00:28:30.400
about me. Yeah, you've lost the plot. That's

00:28:30.400 --> 00:28:33.119
not how God defines me. No wonder I'm feeling

00:28:33.119 --> 00:28:36.420
burnt out and stressed because that's exactly

00:28:36.420 --> 00:28:38.559
where that path is gonna lead you when you rely

00:28:38.559 --> 00:28:42.859
on your own understanding rather than Following

00:28:42.859 --> 00:28:45.720
God's path that he has for you. Yeah, and it

00:28:45.720 --> 00:28:49.059
took me so long to understand that and I'm still

00:28:49.059 --> 00:28:52.480
learning to understand it and there will be another

00:28:52.480 --> 00:28:54.220
time in my life where I forget and then I have

00:28:54.220 --> 00:28:56.400
to re -understand it and re -understand it and

00:28:56.400 --> 00:28:59.700
re -understand it again because life comes in

00:28:59.700 --> 00:29:01.740
all these ways and God is constantly moving and

00:29:01.740 --> 00:29:04.500
I'm constantly changing like he is an alive God

00:29:04.500 --> 00:29:08.599
but something that is he is like so prevalently

00:29:08.599 --> 00:29:12.579
telling me right now it's just like we are working

00:29:12.579 --> 00:29:18.380
together right now to rewire where my priorities

00:29:18.380 --> 00:29:22.480
lie when it comes to Surrender and like learning

00:29:22.480 --> 00:29:26.400
what true surrender is Surrendering my plans

00:29:26.400 --> 00:29:29.599
to him surrendering my life to him surrendering

00:29:29.599 --> 00:29:34.539
everything to him, but It started with the spark

00:29:34.539 --> 00:29:37.380
of that conversation for me because I was like,

00:29:37.660 --> 00:29:42.160
oh my gosh I am like serving like work and success

00:29:42.160 --> 00:29:44.980
right now because temporarily it feels great

00:29:44.980 --> 00:29:52.140
and I feel like really proud I do genuinely delight

00:29:52.140 --> 00:29:55.839
in Accomplishments that happen in this world

00:29:55.839 --> 00:29:58.500
like I'm like, yes, that's awesome. Like I love

00:29:58.500 --> 00:30:02.859
working hard and seeing the fruits of that But

00:30:02.859 --> 00:30:05.380
who gets the honor? Well, who gets the honor

00:30:05.380 --> 00:30:08.299
and also at some point that's not gonna feel

00:30:08.299 --> 00:30:10.180
the same way that it did So then you're just

00:30:10.180 --> 00:30:12.839
gonna try to get more. Yeah and more and more

00:30:12.839 --> 00:30:17.700
and the cycle repeats itself when The caveat

00:30:17.700 --> 00:30:21.359
of that as a follower of Jesus is I don't have

00:30:21.359 --> 00:30:24.039
to search for my worth in anything. I already

00:30:24.039 --> 00:30:26.599
know that. I know I'm made holy. I know that

00:30:26.599 --> 00:30:30.079
the sermon this Sunday that we listened to was

00:30:30.079 --> 00:30:32.619
about sanctification. I know that I'm being sanctified.

00:30:32.859 --> 00:30:34.799
Sanctification is a process. It's constantly

00:30:34.799 --> 00:30:39.779
happening. I know whose I am. I know my identity.

00:30:39.940 --> 00:30:41.619
All that. That doesn't change. I don't have to

00:30:41.619 --> 00:30:45.390
work for that. I freely get that. Freely. Once

00:30:45.390 --> 00:30:47.309
I leave this earth, I get to be with my Creator

00:30:47.309 --> 00:30:49.369
forever. So I get all those things for free.

00:30:49.589 --> 00:30:52.809
Now, how can I take this foundation that I have

00:30:52.809 --> 00:30:57.450
and use it in what I do here on this earth and

00:30:57.450 --> 00:31:01.069
use that as fuel to work hard? God wants us to

00:31:01.069 --> 00:31:03.210
work hard. God wants me to enjoy work. God wants

00:31:03.210 --> 00:31:06.549
me to work hard and celebrate my successes. He

00:31:06.549 --> 00:31:10.089
wants to share that with me. But if I just do

00:31:10.089 --> 00:31:12.430
it all on my own, I've eliminated him from the

00:31:12.430 --> 00:31:19.859
picture. at some point it's gonna fail. And that's

00:31:19.859 --> 00:31:22.180
just gonna, I'm just gonna take that personally

00:31:22.180 --> 00:31:26.579
and then equate that with who I am and my identity.

00:31:27.380 --> 00:31:32.599
And that's not fun. That's no way to live. All

00:31:32.599 --> 00:31:35.059
that to say, I kind of went on a little soapbox,

00:31:35.380 --> 00:31:40.880
but it starts with neglecting rest because the

00:31:40.880 --> 00:31:45.460
moment that you stop centering yourself with

00:31:45.460 --> 00:31:48.920
reality of the bigger picture of what's going

00:31:48.920 --> 00:31:51.480
on here and how small we are and how big God

00:31:51.480 --> 00:31:59.240
is. When you take that away, things just never

00:31:59.240 --> 00:32:01.920
stop. It's like a hamster wheel. That's what

00:32:01.920 --> 00:32:04.980
Sabbath does for me. Like you were saying, it

00:32:04.980 --> 00:32:08.940
brings me back to reality. It shows me that there's

00:32:08.940 --> 00:32:15.940
life outside of my little bubble. So that's my

00:32:15.940 --> 00:32:22.039
two cents We live in a hustle culture world and

00:32:22.039 --> 00:32:26.980
we're actively having to Fight against that not

00:32:26.980 --> 00:32:32.279
disapprove of it. I think there are great Traits

00:32:32.279 --> 00:32:35.299
in Like you were saying in the beginning like

00:32:35.299 --> 00:32:37.920
I think working hard is a great thing. I think

00:32:37.920 --> 00:32:41.259
wanting to utilize time. Well is a great thing

00:32:41.259 --> 00:32:45.029
like There are many great things that can come

00:32:45.029 --> 00:32:48.349
from like oh work hard like play work hard play

00:32:48.349 --> 00:32:52.670
hard but Is this work hard play hard? This is

00:32:52.670 --> 00:32:54.630
work hard play hard. Okay. I didn't know that

00:32:54.630 --> 00:32:57.210
I thought was rock and roll, but it can just

00:32:57.210 --> 00:33:00.890
Consume you so quickly and I lived my life like

00:33:00.890 --> 00:33:04.690
that for so long like I felt guilty if I had

00:33:04.690 --> 00:33:09.210
a moment to breathe because I I Felt like I was

00:33:09.210 --> 00:33:11.730
doing something wrong. Yeah, like if I didn't

00:33:11.730 --> 00:33:16.839
have something at every second of the day. Like

00:33:16.839 --> 00:33:19.619
it almost was like a flex. I was like, Oh, I

00:33:19.619 --> 00:33:21.160
can't, I'm busy because I have this, this, this,

00:33:21.200 --> 00:33:25.059
and this. Well, people equate people that are

00:33:25.059 --> 00:33:27.259
quote unquote busy and like to tell people they're

00:33:27.259 --> 00:33:29.380
busy. They, they equate that with importance.

00:33:30.319 --> 00:33:35.200
Yeah. I'm so busy. So I'm so important. Don't

00:33:35.200 --> 00:33:37.079
even know if it was important. I just felt like

00:33:37.079 --> 00:33:38.880
I was doing it wrong Like I felt like I was doing

00:33:38.880 --> 00:33:40.359
life wrong because I was like, well, everybody

00:33:40.359 --> 00:33:42.099
else is always doing stuff So I got to do stuff

00:33:42.099 --> 00:33:44.759
too. Hmm, and then if I wasn't doing stuff, then

00:33:44.759 --> 00:33:47.039
I was like, what do I do? We have such different

00:33:47.039 --> 00:33:49.819
brains. It's actually crazy. Why I just don't

00:33:49.819 --> 00:33:54.259
think like that and I feel like there's so many

00:33:54.259 --> 00:33:58.779
other areas where I fall short, obviously, but

00:33:58.779 --> 00:34:04.819
I've never just wanted to be super busy I never

00:34:04.819 --> 00:34:09.219
have craved busyness could not be me I've been

00:34:09.219 --> 00:34:12.019
busy like my life has gotten so busy and it's

00:34:12.019 --> 00:34:15.360
been everybody gets busy But I've never just

00:34:15.360 --> 00:34:17.420
been the one that's been like man. I wish I had

00:34:17.420 --> 00:34:20.480
more stuff to do Well, you know how that started

00:34:20.480 --> 00:34:23.719
for me. It's my freshman year of high school

00:34:23.719 --> 00:34:27.099
and I wanted to stay busy so I didn't have to

00:34:27.099 --> 00:34:29.360
sit alone in my thoughts because if I sat alone

00:34:29.360 --> 00:34:33.590
in my thoughts then I would I would start thinking

00:34:33.590 --> 00:34:36.190
irrational thoughts. And if I started thinking

00:34:36.190 --> 00:34:38.449
irrational thoughts, my brain would tell me,

00:34:38.469 --> 00:34:40.929
oh, at some point they'll become true or you

00:34:40.929 --> 00:34:43.090
won't be able to stop thinking like this. So

00:34:43.090 --> 00:34:44.329
I was like, if I'm always doing something, if

00:34:44.329 --> 00:34:46.309
I'm always with people, I never have to sit alone

00:34:46.309 --> 00:34:51.050
in my thoughts. I remember it actually as clear

00:34:51.050 --> 00:34:54.150
as day. It was the second semester of my freshman

00:34:54.150 --> 00:34:56.070
year. Well, this all kind of started - Oh, I

00:34:56.070 --> 00:34:58.369
thought you were talking about high school. I

00:34:58.369 --> 00:35:00.920
am. Oh. Freshman year of high school. Second

00:35:00.920 --> 00:35:03.420
semester. So like we had their Christmas break.

00:35:03.940 --> 00:35:06.239
Yeah, we had like half semesters So I guess technically

00:35:06.239 --> 00:35:08.579
was the third semester, but that those would

00:35:08.579 --> 00:35:11.380
be trying. He has like two. Yeah. Yeah, whatever

00:35:11.380 --> 00:35:13.840
I think we did have four semesters But for me,

00:35:13.840 --> 00:35:15.179
it was like the first half of the year second

00:35:15.179 --> 00:35:16.739
half of the year because we did a block schedule

00:35:16.739 --> 00:35:19.900
So we had like we did it college college style.

00:35:19.900 --> 00:35:23.619
So I had four classes In a day classes in a day.

00:35:23.820 --> 00:35:26.139
Yeah, it was like long weird class an hour and

00:35:26.139 --> 00:35:29.059
a half Wow, this is like college style. I had

00:35:29.059 --> 00:35:32.039
six classes in a day So I had I had really remember

00:35:32.039 --> 00:35:34.300
I had four classes before Christmas and then

00:35:34.300 --> 00:35:37.039
a different set of classes after Christmas That's

00:35:37.039 --> 00:35:40.079
what we had but six and six. Okay. So anyways

00:35:40.079 --> 00:35:44.000
so the first half it started developing because

00:35:44.000 --> 00:35:50.659
I Got I went to high school and was like fresh

00:35:50.659 --> 00:35:54.559
off of also recovering from an ED. Yeah. So you

00:35:54.559 --> 00:35:56.639
lose your personality there too. I mean, everything

00:35:56.639 --> 00:36:00.800
is just centered around this thing. So anyways,

00:36:01.019 --> 00:36:03.400
I had, you know, fresh off of recovery and all

00:36:03.400 --> 00:36:06.219
that. I had my eighth grade year to enjoy. Like

00:36:06.219 --> 00:36:08.800
eighth grade was great. Then I go to high school

00:36:08.800 --> 00:36:14.519
and I'm just like, who am I? What is my personality?

00:36:15.690 --> 00:36:17.969
What do I like? What do I not like? How do I

00:36:17.969 --> 00:36:20.230
act? Everyone's new. All these people. Yeah,

00:36:20.230 --> 00:36:22.190
I'm sure that didn't help either. No, everyone

00:36:22.190 --> 00:36:24.449
is... Well, and I was in classes where, like,

00:36:24.449 --> 00:36:26.369
people were older than me. Like, my first class,

00:36:26.389 --> 00:36:29.090
my freshman year. Oh, you were smart. Not super

00:36:29.090 --> 00:36:31.389
smart. Were you in, like, advanced classes? I

00:36:31.389 --> 00:36:33.230
don't know. I was in geometry or something. I

00:36:33.230 --> 00:36:35.409
don't know. Dang! Geometry freshman year? Okay,

00:36:35.590 --> 00:36:40.110
right. I don't know. Anyways, I was in my first

00:36:40.110 --> 00:36:42.030
class walking in. It was all sophomores. I was

00:36:42.030 --> 00:36:44.570
like, I have no idea who these people are. Like...

00:36:44.599 --> 00:36:49.199
They were all cool kids. I just freaked out.

00:36:49.539 --> 00:36:54.239
I was so desperate, not for people's approval.

00:36:54.420 --> 00:36:55.940
I really didn't care what people thought about

00:36:55.940 --> 00:37:01.119
me, but I was desperate to know what my prototype

00:37:01.119 --> 00:37:06.099
was. Who did people describe Abby as? I wanted

00:37:06.099 --> 00:37:10.460
my traits. And you wanted to be funny. And so

00:37:10.460 --> 00:37:15.239
I wanted to be funny. You know, I'm a I don't

00:37:15.239 --> 00:37:16.679
care what people think about me kind of girl

00:37:16.679 --> 00:37:19.780
So I naturally fell into that you're not easily

00:37:19.780 --> 00:37:21.679
embarrassed. No, I'm not easily embarrassed And

00:37:21.679 --> 00:37:23.320
so once I kind of fell into that I was like,

00:37:23.320 --> 00:37:26.260
oh, this is my thing people like this people

00:37:26.260 --> 00:37:29.579
think I'm funny people think I'm the class clown

00:37:29.579 --> 00:37:32.860
like oh if you're in a class with Abby like It's

00:37:32.860 --> 00:37:34.719
gonna be crazy. Like that was kind of like the

00:37:34.719 --> 00:37:36.599
thing and I was I was the girl that was like

00:37:36.599 --> 00:37:38.860
let's invite Abby so it's not awkward like that

00:37:38.860 --> 00:37:43.019
was that was me and I Found my pride in that

00:37:43.019 --> 00:37:49.659
honestly that it it took over and it made me

00:37:49.659 --> 00:37:53.599
terrified of straying from the script and so

00:37:53.599 --> 00:37:57.300
I would go to school every day and perform and

00:37:57.300 --> 00:38:01.500
Be this over -the -top That had to be so exhausting.

00:38:01.519 --> 00:38:03.579
I would come home and not talk to anyone for

00:38:03.579 --> 00:38:06.710
hours I was so tired because all I was doing

00:38:06.710 --> 00:38:08.650
was thinking how I can make people laugh what

00:38:08.650 --> 00:38:10.949
I can do You weren't being yourself to be above

00:38:10.949 --> 00:38:12.929
and beyond you're going like against the grain

00:38:12.929 --> 00:38:15.150
of just like not like your natural self Yeah,

00:38:15.150 --> 00:38:18.030
because my natural self is this is chill. I mean

00:38:18.030 --> 00:38:20.610
i'm a goofy person. Yeah, you're not chill, but

00:38:20.610 --> 00:38:25.269
i'm not i'm not this Well, nobody is like some

00:38:25.269 --> 00:38:28.530
actor funny person exactly robin williams or

00:38:28.530 --> 00:38:30.949
whatever like those comedians that eventually

00:38:30.949 --> 00:38:33.969
like fall into depression because yes, they are

00:38:34.219 --> 00:38:36.139
Cons all they think about is how they can make

00:38:36.139 --> 00:38:39.199
somebody laugh. Yes that that was me Yeah, perfect

00:38:39.199 --> 00:38:42.719
way to put it. So anyways lesser scale when that's

00:38:42.719 --> 00:38:46.320
why I never wanted to be alone funny I felt safe.

00:38:46.380 --> 00:38:48.719
I felt safe with like my small group of people,

00:38:48.980 --> 00:38:53.420
but it was very small group and Anyways all that

00:38:53.420 --> 00:38:57.559
to say That's how the irrational thoughts Cycle

00:38:57.559 --> 00:38:59.519
started because I was like, oh well if I'm alone

00:38:59.519 --> 00:39:01.840
then I'm I'm gonna be like, well, who am I actually

00:39:01.840 --> 00:39:03.849
and I didn't want to Wow. I didn't want to deal

00:39:03.849 --> 00:39:05.650
with that. So I was just like, I'm just going

00:39:05.650 --> 00:39:09.610
to be who everybody says I am. Yeah. Mind you,

00:39:09.610 --> 00:39:11.429
I'm still like reading my Bible, praying all

00:39:11.429 --> 00:39:15.329
these things, but my heart was just so confused

00:39:15.329 --> 00:39:18.409
and I was like, well, Jesus like loves laughter

00:39:18.409 --> 00:39:21.030
and joy. So like I'm doing what I should do.

00:39:21.050 --> 00:39:26.630
I was just very confused. And then it just clicked

00:39:26.630 --> 00:39:29.429
for me one day. I don't have many like light

00:39:29.429 --> 00:39:33.340
switch moments when it comes to my heart posture,

00:39:33.800 --> 00:39:37.099
this was when I remember I walked into the hallway

00:39:37.099 --> 00:39:39.320
after coming back from a doctor's appointment.

00:39:40.719 --> 00:39:42.500
And what was the doctor's appointment for? I

00:39:42.500 --> 00:39:44.440
have no idea. Was it just random? I honestly,

00:39:44.619 --> 00:39:47.460
I think it was for my down there stuff. Oh, okay.

00:39:47.699 --> 00:39:49.800
Your down there stuff. Yeah, this has been a

00:39:49.800 --> 00:39:53.860
theme forever. But I remember as I was the only

00:39:53.860 --> 00:39:56.179
person in the hallways because classes were happening.

00:39:56.219 --> 00:39:59.460
So I was like walking back. From the office like

00:39:59.460 --> 00:40:02.099
to my to go to my class. I'm just walking in

00:40:02.099 --> 00:40:06.039
the hallway and I was like This is high school

00:40:06.039 --> 00:40:10.880
like I Am actively aware that I'm going through

00:40:10.880 --> 00:40:13.940
something and I'm aware of that and I started

00:40:13.940 --> 00:40:16.460
like talking to God and I was like We're gonna

00:40:16.460 --> 00:40:20.219
figure this out. Like I'm gonna be okay we're

00:40:20.219 --> 00:40:23.659
gonna get through this together, but like How

00:40:23.659 --> 00:40:27.550
cool is it that? God you let me know that I'm

00:40:27.550 --> 00:40:30.329
in control of figuring this out. And I almost

00:40:30.329 --> 00:40:33.769
had to like realize to myself that I wasn't okay.

00:40:33.889 --> 00:40:36.269
It was like the first time that I was like, I'm

00:40:36.269 --> 00:40:40.929
not okay. This isn't okay. And now, I mean, I

00:40:40.929 --> 00:40:43.650
blasted online on social media every second when

00:40:43.650 --> 00:40:45.630
I'm like, I'm not okay. I'm not doing well. But

00:40:45.630 --> 00:40:47.429
that was like the first time I'd ever admitted

00:40:47.429 --> 00:40:49.889
it to myself and let down this like, I'm always

00:40:49.889 --> 00:40:51.869
happy. I'm always goofy. I'm always ready to

00:40:51.869 --> 00:40:55.380
make people laugh person. but I felt so much

00:40:55.380 --> 00:40:57.639
joy in the fact that I was struggling. I felt

00:40:57.639 --> 00:41:03.559
so liberated and I was so just like glued to

00:41:03.559 --> 00:41:05.920
God because I was like, we're in this together

00:41:05.920 --> 00:41:08.159
and only you and I know this is happening and

00:41:08.159 --> 00:41:11.019
only you and I know how this feels. And that

00:41:11.019 --> 00:41:15.489
was like the safest. The safest thing yeah, and

00:41:15.489 --> 00:41:17.289
then I went and I sat in my class and I was just

00:41:17.289 --> 00:41:19.510
like I'm good and then from there I mean it just

00:41:19.510 --> 00:41:21.230
slowly kind of progressed and I found a great

00:41:21.230 --> 00:41:23.610
group of friends who I felt like I could be myself

00:41:23.610 --> 00:41:27.829
and it it taught me It taught me how to be confident

00:41:27.829 --> 00:41:30.869
in who Christ made me and I just naturally kind

00:41:30.869 --> 00:41:35.190
of found Who I was and like that changed over

00:41:35.190 --> 00:41:37.070
the course of high school because you have influence

00:41:37.070 --> 00:41:42.380
and friends but Finding who you are is just weird.

00:41:42.579 --> 00:41:49.139
It's weird. I feel like I'm constantly finding

00:41:49.139 --> 00:41:53.659
who I am. I'm sure it'll change when I become

00:41:53.659 --> 00:41:57.000
a mom, and I'm sure it'll change when I become

00:41:57.000 --> 00:42:00.820
an empty nester. I experienced not as much of

00:42:00.820 --> 00:42:03.639
that in college, I think, just because I was...

00:42:03.840 --> 00:42:07.760
confident yeah even for our stages of life right

00:42:07.760 --> 00:42:12.039
now like we went from single we went from dating

00:42:12.039 --> 00:42:14.559
we went from engagement to like all those things

00:42:14.559 --> 00:42:17.199
change i mean i wouldn't i would say as you get

00:42:17.199 --> 00:42:21.239
older it it doesn't change as frequent i think

00:42:21.239 --> 00:42:24.019
i think it just depends on your situation yeah

00:42:24.019 --> 00:42:27.000
like yeah i guess you're right because when i

00:42:27.210 --> 00:42:30.050
was older, I really struggled a lot when I would

00:42:30.050 --> 00:42:32.849
go home from college because I was like, well,

00:42:32.909 --> 00:42:36.570
now I'm this now I'm this person, but who am

00:42:36.570 --> 00:42:39.369
I at home? Like, it's just weird, you know, just

00:42:39.369 --> 00:42:42.670
depends how it kind of creeps in. But the thing

00:42:42.670 --> 00:42:45.329
about confidence is and like being confident

00:42:45.329 --> 00:42:47.630
in who you are and all these things. Like I had

00:42:47.630 --> 00:42:49.170
someone ask me the other day, actually, they

00:42:49.170 --> 00:42:52.389
were like, how are you like confident enough

00:42:52.389 --> 00:42:55.329
to just post things on social media? And I was

00:42:55.329 --> 00:43:04.159
like, I do think I'm confident, but I'm not having

00:43:04.159 --> 00:43:07.480
thoughts or worries of what people are gonna

00:43:07.480 --> 00:43:13.300
think. I'm having those thoughts every day, every

00:43:13.300 --> 00:43:14.840
single day. I'm like, oh, what are people gonna

00:43:14.840 --> 00:43:21.619
say? But I just do it anyway. And I think sometimes

00:43:21.619 --> 00:43:25.980
people can mistake confidence for just... I don't

00:43:25.980 --> 00:43:28.760
ever have a thought about myself and blah, blah,

00:43:28.760 --> 00:43:30.659
blah, blah. I mean, take body image, for example,

00:43:30.760 --> 00:43:34.639
like people, you know, I talk about like being

00:43:34.639 --> 00:43:37.239
in recovery and all these things and gaining

00:43:37.239 --> 00:43:40.159
weight and I'm very open about it, but that does

00:43:40.159 --> 00:43:42.860
not mean for a second that I'm like my body's

00:43:42.860 --> 00:43:46.800
tea and I think I have the best body ever. And

00:43:46.800 --> 00:43:49.420
like, I feel like you share a lot about how you

00:43:49.420 --> 00:43:52.800
are not confident. So that's why I do that. No,

00:43:52.840 --> 00:43:54.719
but I'm just saying it's funny to hear somebody

00:43:54.719 --> 00:43:59.400
say, Like, how are you so confident? But I feel

00:43:59.400 --> 00:44:01.219
like a lot of times you share like, I'm really

00:44:01.219 --> 00:44:03.679
struggling right now. Like I'm, I am, this is

00:44:03.679 --> 00:44:06.340
a rough day. I am not confident in myself, that

00:44:06.340 --> 00:44:10.659
sort of thing. So I feel like it's just funny

00:44:10.659 --> 00:44:14.719
how people will like. Perceive things. Yeah,

00:44:14.760 --> 00:44:17.960
yeah, yeah. Definitely. Well, the thing is, if

00:44:17.960 --> 00:44:22.019
this, this is till the day I die, this is 100

00:44:22.019 --> 00:44:27.039
% how to be confident. is that you cannot get

00:44:27.039 --> 00:44:32.619
it from within yourself. Maybe temporarily. I've

00:44:32.619 --> 00:44:39.440
tried to find it in myself. I don't have that

00:44:39.440 --> 00:44:48.070
much to sustain it. It ends in failure. I forget

00:44:48.070 --> 00:44:50.030
what, and by the way, it's just apart from me,

00:44:50.030 --> 00:44:52.329
you can do nothing. I am the vine, you are the

00:44:52.329 --> 00:44:54.070
branches, apart from me, you can do nothing.

00:44:54.309 --> 00:44:56.809
Absolutely. Like he says, you can do nothing.

00:44:56.829 --> 00:44:58.949
He doesn't say like apart from me, like you could

00:44:58.949 --> 00:45:00.510
probably figure this out or you could do this.

00:45:00.530 --> 00:45:02.610
Like he says, you could do nothing apart from

00:45:02.610 --> 00:45:06.010
me, which is just. I literally read that verse

00:45:06.010 --> 00:45:11.869
today. It's crazy. And the thing about, I listened

00:45:11.869 --> 00:45:14.070
to, I went to a women's conference this weekend.

00:45:14.329 --> 00:45:16.429
Yeah, we were going to talk about that. Yeah,

00:45:16.429 --> 00:45:18.929
so I went to this conference and something terribly

00:45:18.929 --> 00:45:21.809
cobble said She was talking about like the verse

00:45:21.809 --> 00:45:24.170
for the week was i'm the viney or the branches

00:45:24.170 --> 00:45:26.130
apart from me You can do nothing. Oh really?

00:45:26.329 --> 00:45:30.070
It was really really cool. Um, and she was talking

00:45:30.070 --> 00:45:35.449
about like all the Branch has to do is just stay

00:45:35.449 --> 00:45:40.849
attached to the vine and it'll grow Like the

00:45:40.849 --> 00:45:46.380
vine is what? keeps the branches together. And

00:45:46.380 --> 00:45:49.559
the branches, all that their job is to do is

00:45:49.559 --> 00:45:51.440
to stay attached to that vine and they're gonna

00:45:51.440 --> 00:45:57.460
grow. But if they try to go off and do it on

00:45:57.460 --> 00:46:00.679
their own, they're gonna go nowhere. They're

00:46:00.679 --> 00:46:02.659
gonna die. They're gonna stay there. They're

00:46:02.659 --> 00:46:05.800
not gonna grow. So it's just interesting that

00:46:05.800 --> 00:46:09.940
imagery. Because if we are the branches and Christ

00:46:09.940 --> 00:46:13.429
is the vine, All we need to do is just stay attached

00:46:13.429 --> 00:46:19.650
to him. And he will be the one to tell us where

00:46:19.650 --> 00:46:23.769
to go, line our path. It's so true though. And

00:46:23.769 --> 00:46:25.590
then she followed it up with like, and how do

00:46:25.590 --> 00:46:27.750
you stay attached to him? You read his word.

00:46:28.170 --> 00:46:31.710
She said, you can't trust someone you don't know.

00:46:32.230 --> 00:46:33.809
She said, and she was like, and how do you know

00:46:33.809 --> 00:46:37.449
him? You read his word. And then you, I was talking

00:46:37.449 --> 00:46:39.449
to this with my therapist. She was like, where

00:46:39.449 --> 00:46:43.329
do you? look for God. And I said, I couldn't

00:46:43.329 --> 00:46:45.610
tell you the last time that I went out and looked

00:46:45.610 --> 00:46:49.570
for God. Wow. That was a chilling thought because

00:46:49.570 --> 00:46:52.449
I was so consumed with how busy my days were

00:46:52.449 --> 00:46:55.190
and how much I had to get done and me, me, me,

00:46:55.190 --> 00:47:01.750
me, me. And I started my day in the word, you

00:47:01.750 --> 00:47:05.130
know, as a good Christian girl does. And then

00:47:05.130 --> 00:47:08.949
I would just switch that brain off and What do

00:47:08.949 --> 00:47:10.710
I need to get done? How do I get it done to the

00:47:10.710 --> 00:47:12.630
best of my ability? Let me get all this done

00:47:12.630 --> 00:47:15.550
that I would Forget about christ. You just left

00:47:15.550 --> 00:47:17.909
him in the room. You were reading him and well

00:47:17.909 --> 00:47:21.050
That's like how your brain probably yeah, and

00:47:21.050 --> 00:47:24.110
then I sit and then I would sit there at the

00:47:24.110 --> 00:47:26.630
end of the day and wonder like Why do I just

00:47:26.630 --> 00:47:30.489
feel so out of control and why do I then all

00:47:30.489 --> 00:47:36.010
of a sudden? All my health starts declining And

00:47:36.010 --> 00:47:39.769
now i'm sitting here you know, almost four months

00:47:39.769 --> 00:47:43.309
into my health kind of being wonky. Four months?

00:47:43.710 --> 00:47:46.590
I mean four weeks. What do you say? You've been

00:47:46.590 --> 00:47:48.789
lying to me. Almost four weeks into my health

00:47:48.789 --> 00:47:53.030
being wonky and all I want to do is talk about

00:47:53.030 --> 00:47:56.130
God. I don't care about myself. Like, I just

00:47:56.130 --> 00:47:59.929
want to talk about him. And I just don't believe

00:47:59.929 --> 00:48:03.329
that's a coincidence. You couldn't, you can't

00:48:03.329 --> 00:48:05.699
convince me that's a coincidence. that I was

00:48:05.699 --> 00:48:12.059
so out of control. Not even knowing it. But you

00:48:12.059 --> 00:48:17.599
probably could witness how just go, go, go I

00:48:17.599 --> 00:48:20.599
am. Especially when it comes to the day being

00:48:20.599 --> 00:48:24.079
started and how short of a fuse I have when it

00:48:24.079 --> 00:48:26.199
comes to being off schedule because we need to

00:48:26.199 --> 00:48:32.079
get things done and we need to... And then I

00:48:32.079 --> 00:48:35.360
was literally forced to slow down. And by the

00:48:35.360 --> 00:48:38.920
grace of God, he slowed me down and I've had

00:48:38.920 --> 00:48:43.880
time to be like, whoa Where is God in my life?

00:48:43.960 --> 00:48:46.920
And why am I not looking for him? And how do

00:48:46.920 --> 00:48:53.320
I fix that real quick? So Yeah, I just think

00:48:53.320 --> 00:48:56.559
you know, this is part of it like this is just

00:48:56.559 --> 00:49:02.719
part of a walk with Christ like I am forever

00:49:02.719 --> 00:49:06.719
and always going to follow Jesus forever in my

00:49:06.719 --> 00:49:10.099
life, but that doesn't mean that I'm gonna be

00:49:10.099 --> 00:49:15.199
like perfect at it ever because I'm not and so

00:49:15.199 --> 00:49:18.980
Yeah, I don't know I just I think there's so

00:49:18.980 --> 00:49:22.179
much beauty in the fact that like we are his

00:49:22.179 --> 00:49:26.730
children and Did you think there is I know there

00:49:26.730 --> 00:49:30.530
is You know, I mean think of a toddler when they

00:49:30.530 --> 00:49:32.809
feel scared or in danger they run to their parent

00:49:32.809 --> 00:49:35.869
and like that's That was me. I was like, I don't

00:49:35.869 --> 00:49:39.909
know what to do And all the parent wants to do

00:49:39.909 --> 00:49:43.710
is just Wrap them a big hug and that's what God's

00:49:43.710 --> 00:49:46.949
doing for me right now. Yeah, he is and I'm excited

00:49:46.949 --> 00:49:49.630
He'd be doing I'm excited when I have experienced

00:49:49.630 --> 00:49:51.389
a little more of what's going on in my life to

00:49:51.389 --> 00:49:54.969
like actually go into the details of what's happening,

00:49:55.050 --> 00:49:57.570
but I think right now it's just between me and

00:49:57.570 --> 00:50:00.070
God and that kind of feels really special. So

00:50:00.070 --> 00:50:02.389
was I being boring? No, you weren't being boring

00:50:02.389 --> 00:50:04.530
at all. I love that. It's great. You were just

00:50:04.530 --> 00:50:07.110
like sitting there and you were talking. What

00:50:07.110 --> 00:50:10.550
was I supposed to do? Yeah. Mm hmm. I did that

00:50:10.550 --> 00:50:13.489
a lot. I'm an audible listener. I know I'm not.

00:50:13.599 --> 00:50:16.719
yeah you're not oh my gosh y 'all this is like

00:50:16.719 --> 00:50:19.460
vibe change but i was talking on the i was talking

00:50:19.460 --> 00:50:21.219
on the phone with my sister her name is morgan

00:50:21.219 --> 00:50:24.860
shout out morgan and she was talking to ryan

00:50:24.860 --> 00:50:27.019
about something that we're working on that you

00:50:27.019 --> 00:50:30.280
guys can't know about yet sorry i had to do that

00:50:30.280 --> 00:50:34.900
i had to do that i'm sorry but you guys anyways

00:50:34.900 --> 00:50:39.500
it's really not a big deal at all so anyways

00:50:39.500 --> 00:50:50.819
i was talking to her about something Anyways,

00:50:50.819 --> 00:50:54.780
and so Morgan was like, Ryan, like, are you here?

00:50:54.840 --> 00:50:56.719
And I was like, cause I had just taken him out

00:50:56.719 --> 00:50:59.320
of my ears, like my headphones. So he was on

00:50:59.320 --> 00:51:00.619
speaker. So she was like, can you hear me? And

00:51:00.619 --> 00:51:02.980
he was like, yeah. So she starts talking and

00:51:02.980 --> 00:51:04.840
she was like, yeah, blah, blah, blah. Like, I

00:51:04.840 --> 00:51:09.400
think this and you know, blah, blah, blah. I

00:51:09.400 --> 00:51:13.590
think this. And then she goes, and Ryan's just

00:51:13.590 --> 00:51:15.929
listening, and I know what's going on, but she

00:51:15.929 --> 00:51:17.210
doesn't know what's going on. And then she just

00:51:17.210 --> 00:51:19.989
goes, can you guys hear me? Am I cutting out?

00:51:20.030 --> 00:51:22.110
And I said, no, my husband just doesn't respond

00:51:22.110 --> 00:51:23.909
whenever you talk. So even if you pause, he's

00:51:23.909 --> 00:51:26.829
not gonna say anything. And she was like, oh,

00:51:26.889 --> 00:51:30.630
am I like, you know, oh, or whatever. And I was

00:51:30.630 --> 00:51:33.050
like, yeah, just get used to it. She just thought

00:51:33.050 --> 00:51:36.610
that what she was saying was not. Important yeah,

00:51:36.650 --> 00:51:38.670
I was like no like I'm letting you just go through

00:51:38.670 --> 00:51:40.349
everything and then I'll say whatever at the

00:51:40.349 --> 00:51:42.909
end But yeah, but usually it's like mm -hmm.

00:51:43.190 --> 00:51:45.369
Yeah, okay Yeah, well I just like in processing

00:51:45.369 --> 00:51:47.309
what she's saying because I wanted to take it

00:51:47.309 --> 00:51:49.530
all in and figure out okay Yeah, I could I could

00:51:49.530 --> 00:51:51.329
do that and she literally was like yeah, and

00:51:51.329 --> 00:51:53.289
maybe it should be like this like in my head

00:51:53.289 --> 00:51:56.570
I was I was I was Saying stuff you know what

00:51:56.570 --> 00:52:01.289
I mean no I actually have no idea what my head

00:52:01.289 --> 00:52:04.369
if she says, yeah, you could like change this

00:52:04.369 --> 00:52:07.250
and put it this way in my head. I'm like, yeah,

00:52:07.329 --> 00:52:09.110
like that might look good. I mean, I need to

00:52:09.110 --> 00:52:13.309
try that. Yeah, but you just said nothing. I

00:52:13.309 --> 00:52:15.650
know you just say nothing, but I am listening.

00:52:15.750 --> 00:52:19.300
You know, I was taking it all in. Yeah. We just

00:52:19.300 --> 00:52:21.699
might need like a uh -huh here and there. I'll

00:52:21.699 --> 00:52:23.920
practice my arms. Not not for yourself but just

00:52:23.920 --> 00:52:25.519
to give the other person a little confidence

00:52:25.519 --> 00:52:28.519
because speaking from experience it makes a difference

00:52:28.519 --> 00:52:30.719
in the conversation. Well too it's different

00:52:30.719 --> 00:52:32.400
though whenever you're talking to me usually

00:52:32.400 --> 00:52:35.460
I'm just staring at you. But sometimes all the

00:52:35.460 --> 00:52:37.139
time I'll be like blah blah blah blah blah you

00:52:37.139 --> 00:52:39.780
know and you never say anything so then I just

00:52:39.780 --> 00:52:45.199
feel dumb like I'm like yeah I hate shaving my

00:52:45.199 --> 00:52:51.619
legs you know. Well, actually no Well, it does

00:52:51.619 --> 00:53:02.860
kind of seem like you do hate it actually Things

00:53:02.860 --> 00:53:06.480
are hairy no what? Okay. Okay. I'm just kidding.

00:53:06.480 --> 00:53:13.719
Just kidding. That's joke funny joke. Haha How

00:53:13.719 --> 00:53:15.820
does it feel to get no response and just sit

00:53:15.820 --> 00:53:18.059
there in silence? Well, I got a response. You

00:53:18.059 --> 00:53:23.920
started laughing. You did. Wait, pause. Let me

00:53:23.920 --> 00:53:27.219
try not to laugh. Don't laugh. Serious business.

00:53:28.719 --> 00:53:31.320
You can't laugh either. I'm not laughing. I'm

00:53:31.320 --> 00:53:33.940
being so serious right now. Just forget it. No,

00:53:33.940 --> 00:53:37.059
you have to look at me. You can't break. Am I

00:53:37.059 --> 00:53:40.099
that funny looking? You looked at me and immediately

00:53:40.099 --> 00:53:44.559
smiled. No laughing. Okay, what are you doing?

00:53:44.719 --> 00:53:46.199
You're not even trying. I'm trying not to smile.

00:53:46.380 --> 00:53:48.920
No, you're not trying. Think of something really

00:53:48.920 --> 00:53:54.119
sad. Okay. And look at me. You spat on me. Sorry,

00:53:54.159 --> 00:54:00.980
sorry, sorry. Okay. You could never be an actor.

00:54:01.179 --> 00:54:03.179
I'm just kidding. You actually would be an amazing

00:54:03.179 --> 00:54:04.820
actor. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, you would.

00:54:04.820 --> 00:54:06.960
No, I don't think so. No, you would. I'm not

00:54:06.960 --> 00:54:08.159
gonna speak down on you like that because it's

00:54:08.159 --> 00:54:10.940
not even true. I think if I could cast Ryan in

00:54:10.940 --> 00:54:12.360
a movie, I tell him - Wait, you think I could

00:54:12.360 --> 00:54:15.860
act actually? Yes. Okay. Ryan, you're so good.

00:54:16.519 --> 00:54:18.679
Have you seen our Instagram? You do these skits

00:54:18.679 --> 00:54:20.699
and you're like, great. It's different. No, it's

00:54:20.699 --> 00:54:24.019
not. It's dip. It's a different form. I was chicken

00:54:24.019 --> 00:54:29.280
little at one point in my life. What I was. We've

00:54:29.280 --> 00:54:31.380
heard this. I was the main character in a play.

00:54:31.500 --> 00:54:34.260
Okay. But listen, Ryan, I'm trying to hype you

00:54:34.260 --> 00:54:37.579
up. You're really good at it. You just don't

00:54:37.579 --> 00:54:39.880
have experience. But if you had the experience,

00:54:39.920 --> 00:54:42.420
I think you would be an incredible actor. I told

00:54:42.420 --> 00:54:44.480
Ryan if I could see him acting in something,

00:54:44.539 --> 00:54:47.639
it would be like a style of movie that's like

00:54:47.639 --> 00:54:50.159
the Kissing Booth or like To All the Boys I Loved

00:54:50.159 --> 00:54:53.320
Before or like one of those like cutesy rom -coms.

00:54:53.340 --> 00:54:55.400
Oh, you have said that. I didn't know those movies.

00:54:55.480 --> 00:54:58.619
Kissing Booth? Yeah, it's like all the girlies

00:54:58.619 --> 00:55:01.739
watched it back in the day. It's like one of

00:55:01.739 --> 00:55:04.019
those like cutesy ones that you're like, oh,

00:55:04.019 --> 00:55:07.159
it's a little like silly, but it's good like

00:55:07.159 --> 00:55:11.380
the notebook No, the notebook is like Oscar award

00:55:11.380 --> 00:55:14.679
great movie. Yeah, that's like Leonardo Caprio

00:55:14.679 --> 00:55:17.179
Ryan Gosling level Well, Ryan Gosling is the

00:55:17.179 --> 00:55:20.360
one that plays Noah, but and he's so good. He's

00:55:20.360 --> 00:55:22.380
really good Ryan Gosling is really good La La

00:55:22.380 --> 00:55:25.420
Land great movie. Oh, yeah, I forgot about La

00:55:25.420 --> 00:55:27.420
La Land. Well, he's in that I know yeah, he's

00:55:27.420 --> 00:55:29.239
really good at Emma Stone. That might be his

00:55:29.239 --> 00:55:32.219
best movie No. What do you think his best movie

00:55:32.219 --> 00:55:34.920
is? Barbie movie? No, it's not. I'm just kidding.

00:55:35.199 --> 00:55:36.559
La La Land is better than Barbie. He did win

00:55:36.559 --> 00:55:39.300
an award for it though. For what? For Barbie

00:55:39.300 --> 00:55:41.460
movie. Well, the Barbie movie is good. I just

00:55:41.460 --> 00:55:45.500
don't think it's as good as La La Land. No, I

00:55:45.500 --> 00:55:48.079
like, I would, I don't know. I haven't seen all

00:55:48.079 --> 00:55:50.920
of Ryan Gosling's movies, but I have a love -hate

00:55:50.920 --> 00:55:52.940
relationship with La La Land because I really,

00:55:52.940 --> 00:55:55.059
I really, really like La La Land a lot. And I

00:55:55.059 --> 00:56:00.900
think it, it's great for just It felt like very

00:56:00.900 --> 00:56:04.559
classic old school musical, like back in the

00:56:04.559 --> 00:56:10.000
day musical, but, but, but, but there's nothing

00:56:10.000 --> 00:56:15.079
that beats musical theater. Like live action

00:56:15.079 --> 00:56:18.059
on the stage musical theater. And I think I'm

00:56:18.059 --> 00:56:20.219
going to like it better when it's for the stage.

00:56:20.719 --> 00:56:23.639
So I'm saving my, Oh my gosh, it's amazing for

00:56:23.639 --> 00:56:25.099
when it goes to Broadway. Are they doing that?

00:56:25.280 --> 00:56:27.780
There was a rumor that it was. I don't think

00:56:27.780 --> 00:56:30.679
it is anymore. Is the La La Land coffee shop

00:56:30.679 --> 00:56:33.300
affiliated with the movie? I don't think so.

00:56:33.840 --> 00:56:36.039
I don't know though. Seems weird. Yeah, I'm not

00:56:36.039 --> 00:56:38.139
really sure. What are your thoughts on La La

00:56:38.139 --> 00:56:40.139
Land coffee shop? It's really good. Oh really?

00:56:40.460 --> 00:56:41.980
You liked it? Well, we went in LA. I liked it.

00:56:42.219 --> 00:56:45.219
Yeah, I just... I don't know. Maybe I got the

00:56:45.219 --> 00:56:47.480
wrong thing. Oh, you didn't like your drink.

00:56:47.679 --> 00:56:49.900
yeah it just wasn't sweet enough for me yeah

00:56:49.900 --> 00:56:51.940
but i just got like a regular latte no you got

00:56:51.940 --> 00:56:54.119
the wrong drink remember they didn't they didn't

00:56:54.119 --> 00:56:56.920
put anything in it remember that's what it was

00:56:56.920 --> 00:56:58.800
we didn't have time because we were going to

00:56:58.800 --> 00:57:01.480
dancing with the stars yes i do remember that

00:57:01.480 --> 00:57:03.400
now so i need another lalaland experience but

00:57:03.400 --> 00:57:05.099
this time maybe i might get a signature drink

00:57:05.099 --> 00:57:07.510
because i feel like that's more fun or like a

00:57:07.510 --> 00:57:09.789
matcha or something. I think the aesthetic though

00:57:09.789 --> 00:57:12.690
is I mean the coffee was good to me I thought

00:57:12.690 --> 00:57:14.710
it was really good but apart from that the aesthetic

00:57:14.710 --> 00:57:17.829
inside is really cool. Yeah with like the yellow

00:57:17.829 --> 00:57:20.590
and stuff. Yeah and I like so the one in LA I

00:57:20.590 --> 00:57:23.309
forget what part of the area what's that like

00:57:23.309 --> 00:57:25.230
shopping center called? The Grove? The Grove

00:57:25.230 --> 00:57:28.710
yeah in LA they have like an outdoor window that

00:57:28.710 --> 00:57:31.239
they give the remember Yeah, it's like a drive

00:57:31.239 --> 00:57:33.679
-through window, but not cars. And they just

00:57:33.679 --> 00:57:35.659
call your name and I thought that was really

00:57:35.659 --> 00:57:37.440
cool. Is that the coolest coffee shop you've

00:57:37.440 --> 00:57:41.760
ever been to? I'm trying to think of the coolest

00:57:41.760 --> 00:57:43.840
coffee shop we've ever been to. Yeah, that's

00:57:43.840 --> 00:57:48.039
a good question. I can't really think. We saw

00:57:48.039 --> 00:57:51.280
a bunch of cool ones in LA. But the thing about

00:57:51.280 --> 00:57:53.360
us is that well at the time when we were looking

00:57:53.360 --> 00:57:56.199
for cool coffee shops in LA None of them sold

00:57:56.199 --> 00:57:59.739
stevia. It was all like natural stuff. And so

00:57:59.739 --> 00:58:02.780
we're both like stevia drinkers So we walked

00:58:02.780 --> 00:58:04.800
into these places and they didn't have stevia.

00:58:05.039 --> 00:58:07.239
So then we were like, well, I guess we'll go

00:58:07.239 --> 00:58:10.559
somewhere else. You remember that? Yeah, kind

00:58:10.559 --> 00:58:14.219
of not really. Oh, never mind then. Well, I was

00:58:14.219 --> 00:58:16.889
just thinking of coffee shops La La Land's probably

00:58:16.889 --> 00:58:18.809
up there, but I don't think it's my favorite.

00:58:19.230 --> 00:58:20.750
You know what coffee shop I really want to go

00:58:20.750 --> 00:58:22.750
to? Honolulu Coffee Company was probably one

00:58:22.750 --> 00:58:24.550
of my favorites. Oh, I love Honolulu Coffee Company.

00:58:25.369 --> 00:58:26.989
You want to know which one I really want to go

00:58:26.989 --> 00:58:31.309
to? Where? Can you guess? Is it in Hawaii? The

00:58:31.309 --> 00:58:34.449
Nitro Bar. Oh, yeah. In Rhode Island. You're

00:58:34.449 --> 00:58:35.889
obsessed with that place right now. I'm on a

00:58:35.889 --> 00:58:38.610
big Nitro Bar kick. I've known about them for

00:58:38.610 --> 00:58:40.949
a little while, but I just recently become obsessed

00:58:40.949 --> 00:58:43.280
with them because Well, we're like really into

00:58:43.280 --> 00:58:45.619
coffee right now. Like I'm really trying to come

00:58:45.619 --> 00:58:48.019
up with new recipes and just like, we're getting

00:58:48.019 --> 00:58:51.039
a new machine. Yeah. And just experimenting,

00:58:51.139 --> 00:58:52.900
going to kind of build out a little bit of a

00:58:52.900 --> 00:58:55.420
coffee bar. I'm going to make, you know, good

00:58:55.420 --> 00:58:57.639
ingredients, syrups and just, well, it is our

00:58:57.639 --> 00:58:59.820
dream one day to have a coffee shop one day.

00:58:59.860 --> 00:59:02.679
Like we've talked about that for years. We just

00:59:02.679 --> 00:59:05.179
want to have a little cafe that our kids can

00:59:05.179 --> 00:59:08.119
grow up at and There's family vibes and fun,

00:59:08.380 --> 00:59:10.619
but so I've started following a bunch of these

00:59:10.619 --> 00:59:13.719
coffee companies and people that make coffee

00:59:13.719 --> 00:59:16.760
recipes. My entire Instagram is just coffee,

00:59:16.800 --> 00:59:20.260
coffee, coffee. I just think the Nitro Bar, the

00:59:20.260 --> 00:59:23.900
way that they've done marketing is genius. They

00:59:23.900 --> 00:59:26.920
started this trend. They've attached personalities

00:59:26.920 --> 00:59:29.219
to their coffee. Yeah, you get to know the people

00:59:29.219 --> 00:59:30.920
behind the coffee, but then the coffee backs

00:59:30.920 --> 00:59:33.119
it up because it's different coffee than you've

00:59:33.119 --> 00:59:36.570
seen before. It's like the crazy code for cold

00:59:36.570 --> 00:59:38.469
foam, right? They've got like crazy cold foam

00:59:38.469 --> 00:59:40.349
and they've got they call these things called

00:59:40.349 --> 00:59:42.929
floats and like just all this really cool colors

00:59:42.929 --> 00:59:46.309
and You know, it's Rhode Island. So it's cute

00:59:46.309 --> 00:59:49.190
and like very fall vibes and just like Gilmore

00:59:49.190 --> 00:59:52.769
Girl fun And yeah, anyways, that's my dream coffee

00:59:52.769 --> 00:59:55.349
spot unless we have our own speaking of coffee

00:59:55.349 --> 00:59:57.349
shop We went to one today called. What was the

00:59:57.349 --> 01:00:06.820
place called? Cafe Cafe Loredos? Loredes? I don't

01:00:06.820 --> 01:00:08.159
know, but that one was really cool too. Yeah,

01:00:08.199 --> 01:00:10.360
very fancy inside. It had trees inside of it.

01:00:10.360 --> 01:00:12.119
It was more of an upscale kind of vibe. They

01:00:12.119 --> 01:00:14.920
had like swans. Cherry blossom trees. Yeah, it

01:00:14.920 --> 01:00:18.440
was really cool though. Yeah. Yeah. But if we

01:00:18.440 --> 01:00:19.940
had a coffee shop, it would not be that vibe.

01:00:20.500 --> 01:00:22.860
No, no, no. What would be our vibe you think?

01:00:23.320 --> 01:00:24.920
I know exactly what our vibe would be because

01:00:24.920 --> 01:00:29.170
we've talked about it. Remember? kind of yeah

01:00:29.170 --> 01:00:33.050
like like coastal cozy yeah yeah with a window

01:00:33.050 --> 01:00:36.809
lots of light is you know we talk a lot but like

01:00:36.809 --> 01:00:40.070
we're on a podcast yeah yeah oh yeah yeah yeah

01:00:40.070 --> 01:00:42.349
i ask abby questions and she'll be like we've

01:00:42.349 --> 01:00:44.570
talked about this before it's like we're literally

01:00:44.570 --> 01:00:47.570
filming a podcast yeah this is true yeah like

01:00:47.570 --> 01:00:51.769
a big window let in a lot of light nice and cozy

01:00:51.769 --> 01:00:54.670
yeah different i i think different seating would

01:00:54.670 --> 01:01:00.610
be cool like Like a couch and like beanbags and

01:01:00.610 --> 01:01:03.809
yeah, I don't know if I'm a beanbag guy well,

01:01:03.889 --> 01:01:05.570
you know what I mean like different cool like

01:01:05.570 --> 01:01:08.070
some tall bar stools and then like some table

01:01:08.070 --> 01:01:12.789
chairs and Yeah, very eclectic. I like a coffee

01:01:12.789 --> 01:01:15.849
shop where it seems dark in there and it kind

01:01:15.849 --> 01:01:19.880
of is but the point of the coffee shop or like

01:01:19.880 --> 01:01:23.039
the focal point is the massive windows where

01:01:23.039 --> 01:01:26.539
it like draws you. Yeah. So like you're in this

01:01:26.539 --> 01:01:29.039
cozy coffee shop, but like the windows draw you.

01:01:29.139 --> 01:01:30.960
Yeah. So if it rains, you're like, Oh my gosh,

01:01:31.780 --> 01:01:33.519
incredible. If it's like sunny, you still get

01:01:33.519 --> 01:01:35.539
some good light and it kind of shines through.

01:01:36.099 --> 01:01:38.340
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you feel like you're outside.

01:01:39.340 --> 01:01:42.519
We outside with it for real. My mama's kids.

01:01:42.860 --> 01:01:48.469
Right. Why did you just say that? I don't know.

01:01:50.349 --> 01:01:53.070
Alright, be serious. In the podcast. Be serious.

01:01:53.489 --> 01:01:55.170
You in the podcast. You. I don't want to say

01:01:55.170 --> 01:01:57.329
goodbye to them. Alright. Guys, thanks for listening.

01:01:57.550 --> 01:01:59.309
Oh, Ryan wants to say goodbye to you guys. No,

01:01:59.309 --> 01:02:01.250
it's just time. Well, it's time for me to make

01:02:01.250 --> 01:02:03.710
some pizza for us. Oh, Abby's making sourdough

01:02:03.710 --> 01:02:05.389
pizza and I'm so excited. Sourdough pizza, sourdough

01:02:05.389 --> 01:02:07.369
pizza. And I'm starving right now. I'm also really

01:02:07.369 --> 01:02:09.789
hungry. You have no idea how hungry I am right

01:02:09.789 --> 01:02:11.949
now. I'm gonna make pizza without the red sauce.

01:02:12.139 --> 01:02:14.619
What? No, I want the red sauce. You can have

01:02:14.619 --> 01:02:17.219
the red sauce. Oh, okay. I'm not having the red

01:02:17.219 --> 01:02:18.760
sauce on mine. Oh, I see. Okay. All right, guys.

01:02:18.760 --> 01:02:22.920
Because of my new diet. Anyways. So lame. The

01:02:22.920 --> 01:02:25.699
new diet's so lame. The new diet is lame, but...

01:02:25.699 --> 01:02:27.539
You've had coffee, though, lately. And coffee's

01:02:27.539 --> 01:02:29.099
been good, but I'm still a little paranoid on

01:02:29.099 --> 01:02:31.559
all the other stuff. Yeah. All right, well, you

01:02:31.559 --> 01:02:33.900
guys, thanks for listening. This was a fun episode.

01:02:34.500 --> 01:02:36.380
Very... Kind of all over the place, but... Yeah.

01:02:36.880 --> 01:02:39.320
But good. Who knows what the title of this episode

01:02:39.320 --> 01:02:41.139
will be? Sometimes you just need to chill. A

01:02:41.139 --> 01:02:43.699
little podcast. Alright y 'all, thanks for listening.

01:02:44.119 --> 01:02:46.340
We'll be back next week with another episode.

01:02:46.420 --> 01:02:47.519
What are we going to talk about next week, you

01:02:47.519 --> 01:02:51.460
think? Probably your face. And actually I will

01:02:51.460 --> 01:02:53.320
say too, just real quick, if you're still listening,

01:02:53.500 --> 01:02:57.420
you're a real one, but we have potentially, this

01:02:57.420 --> 01:03:00.039
isn't like a promise or anything, but potentially

01:03:00.039 --> 01:03:02.119
two guests coming up in the next like two months.

01:03:03.099 --> 01:03:07.500
But you guys can't know about them yet! Anyways,

01:03:07.500 --> 01:03:16.760
um, thanks for listening In the podcast You can

01:03:16.760 --> 01:03:19.280
be mean and make a joke at the same time did

01:03:19.280 --> 01:03:21.840
you know that all right y 'all my husband mean

01:03:21.840 --> 01:03:24.440
Jesus loves you. We know we love you Jesus loves

01:03:24.440 --> 01:03:25.960
you and