1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,560 Hi, I'm Micah and I'm Chris and this is the Dota Box podcast. 2 00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:10,480 What's up man? Man, I don't know about you, but this week has been something else. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:16,320 Yes it has. This is actually take two of the episodes because it was wild. They didn't want to 4 00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:20,800 record before. I don't know what it was. So we recorded a whole episode 5 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:27,280 yesterday and when we went to edit it, it just wasn't editing. So maybe that's our 6 00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:34,400 cue to do a different episode. You know what? Somebody was telling us it's not good enough 7 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:40,400 and we have to do more. No, I'm joking. So this time around, we were just going to talk about 8 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:45,440 what we were talking about in the old fashioned Dota, but we kind of limited it yesterday 9 00:00:45,440 --> 00:00:48,720 since we were doing the normal show. We're just going to talk about the whole thing. We're going 10 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:56,880 to talk about pre-COVID going into COVID, what 2020 was like for us and kind of some of those crazy 11 00:00:56,880 --> 00:01:04,320 times that happened. So Chris, 2020 was pretty nuts. Even 2019, like leading into 2020 was 12 00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:10,480 pretty crazy, huh? I will tell you, hands down, 2019 was the worst year of my life. Like I can 13 00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:16,000 easily say 2019 was the worst year of my life. Oh yeah? Do you want to digress? Are we going to do 14 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:25,520 Dota Box? Oh yeah. We have to digress, man. I mean, really and truly, that's kind of like, 15 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:33,040 I guess when my marriage started falling apart, like I was working two jobs and my, I'm going to 16 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:39,440 try not to like bash my ex-wife because that's not classy, but my ex-wife was like cheating on me. 17 00:01:39,440 --> 00:01:47,920 And like in that year, being my ex-wife got divorced, I lost my job, right? I was forced to 18 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:55,520 resign because of my divorce. My car died, like all my friends moved away. Like it was, it was just a 19 00:01:55,520 --> 00:02:02,240 really bad year. So 2020, when I got into 2020, 2019 was so bad that 2020 actually wasn't that bad. 20 00:02:02,240 --> 00:02:07,520 Well, you know what's, we have to talk about this too. And maybe, maybe this is the purpose of this 21 00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:12,880 episode. I don't think it is. We'll still talk about 2020. But we haven't told our listeners. We 22 00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:19,760 actually had a hiatus of friendship for a few years. I wouldn't say. Do you want to tell them why? 23 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:26,320 I mean, I'm going to be the first to admit it. I will admit it on the podcast. I will take 24 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:34,400 responsibility on owning 90% of the... Oh, I wouldn't say 90%. I'll fight you on 90%. I'm going to 25 00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:41,280 fight you on 90%. I will say, I don't know. You know, you know, we're going to call it 50-50 26 00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:47,280 because there was some stupid stuff going on on my end. You know, okay, you know what, man? 27 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:52,800 Maybe, which, which stories do we need? Which direction do we need to go with this podcast? 28 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:55,920 Because it's like, we could go either way and it's going to take up the whole time. 29 00:02:55,920 --> 00:02:59,760 Well, we're just flowing with, let's just talk about why we... 30 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:01,840 Yeah, screw it. 31 00:03:01,840 --> 00:03:06,800 Yeah. Why we took a hiatus. And I'll give you some, let me give you some backstory. Okay. 32 00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:14,400 So, I have my ex-wife, which I was dating at the time. Again, I will try to be classy, but she was 33 00:03:14,400 --> 00:03:18,240 very... She did not like Micah and she's very controlling. 34 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:18,880 Controlling. 35 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:25,680 Yep. Very controlling of who I hung out with. So, anytime I would hang out with Micah, it was, 36 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:32,160 like, it would always cause friction between me and my ex-wife. And so, it was, it was nuts. 37 00:03:32,160 --> 00:03:39,040 And both Micah and I, we were, we were kind of in different, we were in different places in life. 38 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:46,480 Places. We were still living at the same house together, but I was going to school working full-time 39 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:51,600 and working an overnight job, which I didn't tell Micah about. And then Micah was in his, 40 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,680 I would say it was your first real... 41 00:03:53,680 --> 00:04:00,080 Bonafide relationship. Like, I had had other relationships, but this was the one that is like, 42 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:04,560 oh yeah, you think you're going to marry that person? You think you would love and all that stuff, 43 00:04:04,560 --> 00:04:12,080 right? So, it was a little different. And not to bash this person too much, but she was not exactly 44 00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:18,800 great as well and really didn't get along with Chris. So, it was like, there was already some 45 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:24,720 tension because, you know, my girl didn't like him and you know how that goes, man. Like, there's 46 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:31,200 definitely that, you know, there's already problems there, right? Like, you can't have your girl and 47 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,280 your best friend not getting along. Like, that'll work. 48 00:04:33,280 --> 00:04:40,080 Which I'm so thankful that all four of us now get along. Like, my wife and Micah's, or yeah, 49 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:44,800 my wife and Micah's wife get along and like, I get along with Micah's wife and Micah gets along 50 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:50,480 with Micah. Like, we all, all four of us just have the best of time together. But like he said, his, 51 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:56,240 his girlfriend did not like me and my girlfriend did not like him. And so, you know, when you're 52 00:04:56,240 --> 00:05:00,320 in a young relationship, all you want to do is spend time with your girlfriend. Like, no fault 53 00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:07,040 of your own. Right. And so, I just remember there were some, like, just kind of some things going 54 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:15,520 on, like in my personal life that was crazy. And also too, we were both living with Micah's parental 55 00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:22,000 units. And so, living at that house was very stressful because you, you were always questioned 56 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:27,280 anytime you were going somewhere or anytime you were coming home. And it was just not a fun place 57 00:05:27,280 --> 00:05:32,720 to live at all. Any, anytime, anytime, any place. And what we're talking about with like the questions, 58 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:36,800 and they might not sound like too much, but it's just like, oh, you know, they'll see like a cup 59 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:40,640 or something. And they'll be like, oh, so you went out to eat, whatever. It's like, so the food 60 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:44,400 that's here is not good enough, huh? It's like, so you had to go out to eat. It's like, well, 61 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:49,760 it's not that. Like, me and Chris just want to go get some like roses or whatever. And, you know, 62 00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:54,320 I remember there was one like Burger King, right? Like, Burger King had that two for five deal. 63 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:58,240 So we're like, okay, let's go get some Whoppers. We come back and it's like, oh, the food's not 64 00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:02,560 good enough for you here and all this other stuff. And it was always like, you always got, 65 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:08,080 I don't know. It was all, it was, that's a whole nother episode. We have to do a whole nother 66 00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:12,880 just talking episode about that too. Multiple episodes to explain that whole situation. 67 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:18,800 Yep. We should for sure. So we are both working at Boot Corral and Micah's girlfriend at the 68 00:06:18,800 --> 00:06:27,040 time actually worked at Boot Corral. And I don't know if I want to share this part on the podcast 69 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:36,480 yet, but there were some things that I was doing that was not great. And I thought, and I was talking 70 00:06:36,480 --> 00:06:42,720 with Micah about it. And I thought that Micah like shared those things with his, with his girlfriend 71 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:47,920 and she went like kind of, I don't know if she went blabbing around or what, but I was like, 72 00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:55,680 No, she definitely did. Yeah, she definitely, she definitely did go around. She was, she was a 73 00:06:55,680 --> 00:07:01,040 Gossiper. Okay. So she, she liked to gossip and that whole, you know, from what you've heard 74 00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:05,280 about Boot Corral, if you've heard our episodes before and what we've talked about, it was a 75 00:07:05,280 --> 00:07:10,000 very gossipy place in the first place. So a lot of times people would get bits of gossip and they 76 00:07:10,000 --> 00:07:15,760 would just go around, right? And, you know, without going into too much details, what was going on, 77 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:22,640 it's hard because my girlfriend came to those conclusions on her own. Like it wasn't anything 78 00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:27,280 that I had told, it just happened to be that coincidental, she came to it on her own because 79 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:32,080 of what she was seeing. And she even asked me about it. I denied, denied, denied. She's like, 80 00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:37,440 Oh, you just cover it for your friend. Like it's, it's got to be going on. And so you're in that 81 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:43,760 bad position because it's like, no, I didn't tell, but what's Chris naturally going to think when, 82 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:47,840 when my girl's out there blabbing to everybody, right? Like my ex-girlfriend's out there blabbing 83 00:07:47,840 --> 00:07:53,760 everybody and saying like, Oh, this is what's going on. And she just happened to hit it and 84 00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:57,760 exactly what was going on, you know, the things that I was involved in it all kind of like, 85 00:07:57,760 --> 00:08:04,640 it all kind of blew up. And my, you know, my ex-girlfriend or ex-wife girlfriend, she found out 86 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:11,600 about it. Like she, she broke up with me for a little bit. And like, I, that was the time of 87 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:16,560 my life that I was like walking away from God and stuff. And so I was just like, you know what, 88 00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:25,360 like I'm, I'm just going to 100% like just, I don't know, just kind of, I think I just tried to 89 00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:30,480 get rid of everything in my life and shut everybody out, which was, it was just kind of like a 90 00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:37,680 self-protection mode. But before that, I actually got an apartment and moved out on my own because 91 00:08:37,680 --> 00:08:41,680 this was the point and you heard us talk about it before where, where Michael was working at the 92 00:08:41,680 --> 00:08:46,400 airport and he wasn't home at all because he was staying at his girlfriend's house because she 93 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:51,120 lived right by the airport. And he was basically like becoming the man of the family and like 94 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:56,080 taking care of all of them. And so like, I hardly ever saw him. So we were already kind of like 95 00:08:56,080 --> 00:09:02,240 drifting apart, I guess you would say. Yeah, I would say that. And not just that, Chris talking 96 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:09,040 about going to, so you've heard of us talking about Fat Cat. If you've heard of some of that 97 00:09:09,040 --> 00:09:16,080 episode about that character, you know, as much as we liked him, he also caused part of it because 98 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:22,400 he was a pot stirrer. Like he liked to just stir the pot for fun and he liked to just, that's just 99 00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:29,600 the kind of guy he was. And Chris would, you know, they had classes and it was in this junior 100 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:34,640 college that was about 30 minutes away. And so they were carpooled together. Like sometimes, 101 00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:41,200 you know, they would go in one person's vehicle or the other. And so I didn't find about this later, 102 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:46,960 but apparently he was telling Chris all sorts of stuff about like, yeah, you know, like I said, 103 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:54,800 this, this and this about you. And you know, there was also some other things. It was believable for 104 00:09:54,800 --> 00:10:00,240 you at the time, because whenever I would hang out with Fat Cat too, we'll talk about this too. 105 00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:05,680 Whenever I would hang out with him, it wasn't very good. Like I didn't treat Chris very well. 106 00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:11,360 I'll say that that that attributed to it as well. That kind of like, it always kind of threw me off 107 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:17,040 because it was like, when me and you like hung out one on one together, like we were fine. But like 108 00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:22,960 whenever Micah got around like Fat Cat and everything, it was, it was one of those things 109 00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:29,520 like he, like I was the butt of all the jokes. And most of the butt of the jokes was like about how 110 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:34,960 quote unquote whipped I was by my ex girlfriend, which I mean, was true at the time. And I just 111 00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:42,240 remember like they came in my room and I'm not going to tell them what they did. But yeah, 112 00:10:42,240 --> 00:10:46,880 but they like, and like, we talked about it when they took the tailgate off my truck. 113 00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:52,800 Right. And that would put all the trash in your, put all the trash. Yeah. Put all the trash in the 114 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:57,360 bed of my truck. Like I wasn't mad about that. It was like, that had been just a culmination of 115 00:10:57,360 --> 00:11:01,760 like everything. And then like when I was on the phone with my ex girlfriend, they would like do 116 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:06,880 stuff to get me in more trouble. And so it was just kind of like a, bro, like what are you doing? 117 00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:11,760 And so Fat Cat definitely would stir the pot. And he'd be like, oh yeah, Micah said this about you 118 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:18,480 and like, it was basically like crap talking about the other one whenever Fat Cat was around. 119 00:11:18,480 --> 00:11:24,000 And it was just us one on one. And so it, it was not good. Yeah. It definitely put a strain there. 120 00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:31,680 And so what ended up happening, I guess we kind of, kind of got there. So, you know, 121 00:11:31,680 --> 00:11:37,280 everything kind of blew up for Chris, right? And that's actually when, you know, I was working 122 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:43,520 at the airport. So I was no longer at boot corral anymore. And, you know, we were, we were still 123 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:52,160 talking and still friends pretty strained. But I remember going to see him 124 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:57,680 because I had heard that he had just been hired to be the assistant manager over at boot corral. 125 00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:03,440 And so like I had some shopping I needed to do. I think I needed a pair of work boots or something. 126 00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:08,880 And I, you know, we all worked on commission. So it's like, okay, he's a manager, like, let me, 127 00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:12,640 let me go over there and, you know, get him some money, right? Like, you know, that sort of thing, 128 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:17,840 right? Help, help a friend out. So I go in there and like, of course, I still know everybody. 129 00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:22,080 And the first thing, I don't know what we call them, do we call them stream bean or what the, 130 00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:28,160 what the heck do we call stream? All stream bean comes up there and he's like, he's like, oh, 131 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:32,720 your friends in there quitting. And I'm like, do what? And it's like, yeah, he's back there quitting 132 00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:38,480 right now. And yeah, apparently Chris was in the back room and he was, he was full on quitting. 133 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:44,880 And like, I waited for a while, but I had to go to work. So like, I had to leave. But I was, I was 134 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:49,440 so confused. I was like, man, he's like quitting his job and everything else. Like, I didn't know 135 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:55,600 what was going on, bro. Yeah. And to be honest, bro, deputy Porcars ratted me out because I talked 136 00:12:55,600 --> 00:13:03,120 to him about potentially like quitting and wasn't sure whether or not I was going to stay. And yeah, 137 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:09,360 bro. And then he, and then deputy Porcars, I guess, told everybody. And so I got back to the, 138 00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:17,440 to the main manager. And I remember I literally sat in that office for an hour and the main manager 139 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:21,760 was telling me was like, you know what? You're making a dumb mistake. And if Jesus was here right 140 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:26,640 now, like he'd smack you in the face and tell you that you're an idiot for quitting and blah, 141 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:34,160 blah, blah, blah, blah. A retail job. Yeah. A retail job, man. And so I remember, I remember like, 142 00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:39,040 he went to go to the bathroom because I felt bad because he was definitely using that manipulation 143 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,080 and guilt. And he was like, well, he's like, I guess I'm going to have to stay here and miss 144 00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:46,400 time with my family because you're quitting tonight and all these other people. And so like that made 145 00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:51,200 me feel bad. I remember he got up to go to the bathroom. And I remember like, I very clearly 146 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:55,520 heard the Lord say like, what are you still doing sitting here? Like, it's time to quit. It's time 147 00:13:55,520 --> 00:14:00,720 to get out of here. Like, you should, you're, you're sitting here way too long. And I was just like, 148 00:14:00,720 --> 00:14:06,400 yeah, you're right guys. So I told him peace out. And yeah, people tried to reach out to me, man. 149 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:11,440 And like, I was just kind of shutting everybody out at that time just because I was dealing with a 150 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:17,360 lot of like personal issues and like a lot of personal pain. And so, and so yeah, man, like, 151 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:24,400 I don't know, bro. I don't know why I just kind of, I felt bad because I just kind of like ghosted 152 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:30,240 Mike. I felt, I felt bad. Yeah. But it was, you know, it was a crazy time. And again, we hardly 153 00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:34,880 ever saw each other. And, you know, there was already some hurtful comments made. We had been 154 00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:41,200 in some fights, you know, it wasn't, it wasn't a good situation at all. And once we got to that 155 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:49,440 point, the next time was the last time I saw you before we reconnected later on. And some things 156 00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:58,160 had happened. And so his ex-wife, who was then his girlfriend, they actually split up for a little 157 00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:04,960 bit at the time. And so like, when I heard that, of course, I had to had to see how he was doing. So 158 00:15:04,960 --> 00:15:10,160 he had moved out to his apartment, you know, and by, you know, this point, I wanted to see what 159 00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:14,880 was going on. And bro, I remember that was one of the, it was hard because it was one of like the 160 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:21,760 saddest times I remember, but it was also one of the, like, I was like worried for you, but like, 161 00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:26,080 we were still in the out. So it was kind of weird. But I just remember walking in there. 162 00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:31,760 And it was, you got to think it was an apartment. He had been in there for a few months. And there 163 00:15:31,760 --> 00:15:38,080 was like nothing, bro. I remember there was like a TV on the floor. There was like a small couch. 164 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:44,160 Wasn't it like a small couch? It was a futon. It was a futon. And I remember it was like, okay, 165 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:49,120 you had the TV on the floor. And I just remember he was like, yeah, the only real thing that I 166 00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:54,560 have for fun that I do is he had like this little basketball goal. And he had like a 167 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:59,760 Nerf gun where he would like, there's a place in town where you can get ice cream in the baseball 168 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:04,160 hat, like a little baseball hat. And so he had all these baseball hats hanging on the wall. And 169 00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:09,440 he's like, I like to like shoot those. So we like sat there and we shot those. And the only other 170 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:15,040 thing I remember about that, besides like shooting those things off the wall, was being like, yeah, 171 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:19,680 you want to go to academy with me, I'm going to buy a punching bag. And I just remember you being 172 00:16:19,680 --> 00:16:23,360 like, what in the heck do you spend your money on? I remember you were just like, 173 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:28,960 I said that to you. Yeah, you were like, I remember you were like, I, you spend the money on some 174 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:34,720 stupid stuff. And because it was like a $200 punching bag or something. And to be fair, 175 00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:38,320 I did spend my money on some really stupid stuff. Well, you had the money that just 176 00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:42,720 blow, you know, yeah, pretty much. But I was just like, yeah, I'm going to go buy this punching 177 00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:46,160 bag. And I just remember like, that was one of our last conversations was just like, what do you 178 00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:50,560 spend your money on? Like, it was almost that Michael Scott to Dwight Trude's like, I don't 179 00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:59,440 understand what you spend your money on. But, but yeah, like we left after that. And like after 180 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:04,960 that, I didn't I didn't hear from them. Yeah, it was a, it was hard man. And because I actually like, 181 00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:10,320 I know it's bad, but I like blocked your parental units and everything. I remember getting a text 182 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:16,320 from a number. And it was like, you don't have to do this. You don't have to, you know, 183 00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:23,760 go on this alone and I just remember texting new number who it is. And let me go back. He responded 184 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:31,200 with this is James. And I was like, Oh, okay, well, all right, cool deal. And you know what's bad? 185 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:36,800 Like the people from boot crowd tried to get me to come back because they made me think that I got 186 00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:43,920 this girl pregnant, which I didn't. And so they like, yeah, they like, they like lied to me and 187 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:49,680 lied to me and told me. And what was wild was the person that my neighbor that was downstairs 188 00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:55,680 was a member from boot corral. And she actually had that girl like living with her for a while. 189 00:17:55,680 --> 00:18:00,480 And I was like, well, if that actually happened, like why didn't they come knock on my door? 190 00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:06,320 I don't ever remember anybody knocking on my door trying to tell me that anything happened. 191 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:14,560 And I was just like, yeah, yeah, it was just some, it was some crazy times, man. They tried to get him back. 192 00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:20,320 And it was, it was crazy because like, I'm hearing all this like second hand and you're just like, 193 00:18:20,320 --> 00:18:25,680 is you don't know if any of it's true. It was some crazy times, man. But yeah, we didn't, 194 00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:30,240 we didn't talk until how many years was that? I didn't, I've never counted it up. 195 00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:38,480 It was five years, five years. So we went five years. And so fast forward to kind of what we 196 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:44,080 were talking about with pre COVID and things like that. I started working in IT, you know, 197 00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:50,000 fast forward working in IT. And I get this really good opportunity back up in Lubbock. And I'm like, 198 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:54,240 okay, yeah, like I'm going to go take this opportunity. So I actually moved up there on 199 00:18:54,240 --> 00:19:03,040 January the first of 2021 or 2020, sorry, not 2021. Jeez 2020. And when I moved up there, 200 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:10,320 I was staying with somebody until I can, you know, get on my feet and get a house and to rent 201 00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:15,360 and whatnot. And so I was staying with them. And I remember it's like, okay, I got to go on the 202 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:19,280 grocery run because you know, you got to get your basics. Like I think I needed like a toothbrush 203 00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:23,280 and some other things, right? So I went to the grocery store and it happened to be the grocery 204 00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:32,320 store Chris was working at. And I really wasn't expecting it, man. But he you walked up to me, 205 00:19:32,320 --> 00:19:36,080 like he just walked up to me just real kind of like, Hey, how's it going? And man, it was just, 206 00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:41,120 it was interesting because it was like, seeing somebody I never thought I was ever going to see 207 00:19:41,120 --> 00:19:48,720 again. Right? Like it was just like, Oh, dang man, like, and granted, I had this sounds kind of 208 00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:54,320 stalkerish of me. But like, I would periodically just like run a Google search on Chris, right? 209 00:19:54,320 --> 00:20:01,040 And just see what was happening. And saw that he had, you know, one I had seen that his, his 210 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:07,680 dad had passed away at one point. And then the other thing I had also seen was that he was going 211 00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:13,280 through a divorce, like at the time. And so like, I knew that was going on. And so, you know, 212 00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:17,600 I don't know. It was, it was very interesting. I didn't know what to expect. Like, when I was 213 00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:22,720 first talking to you. Yeah. Did you, whenever you first talked to me, I'm what I was wondering, 214 00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:28,000 it was like, man, because here's the thing. I actually saw you before I came and went up to 215 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:32,640 you, like you came in and you walked around. And I remember just being like, Oh yeah, like, 216 00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:38,000 man, this is awkward. I don't know if I should say anything to him. But I just remember being like, 217 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:43,840 I just remember being like, No, like, you should definitely go say something to him. Like, you, 218 00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:49,920 like don't be a coward. And, you know, don't, don't just, you know, you need to go say some stuff to 219 00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:55,600 him. And I like, I knew I had messed up and everything. And I was like, man, I don't even know 220 00:20:55,600 --> 00:21:00,560 how he's going to react. But I just remember I walked up to it to you. And I was like, Hey, man, 221 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:07,040 like, hope it's all going good and everything. And, you know, you know, and we, and we sat down 222 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:17,280 we hashed everything out. We talked and, you know, I think a lot of why I are in my, I guess, 223 00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:22,640 19 year old, 20 year old brain, whenever I decided to just shut everybody out, I was kind of like, 224 00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:28,000 associating you with your parental units, because I felt like you were super close to them at that 225 00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:32,960 time and kind of told them everything. And so that was like also part of why I was like, Oh man, 226 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:37,600 like, I don't know if I could trust this guy. Yeah, for sure. But, but once we sat down and 227 00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:41,760 like hashed everything out, I was like, Oh, this guy is like definitely, you know, like 228 00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:48,800 we have both changed. And I took us like in a big way. We have both kind of grown up, I guess, 229 00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:55,920 you should say. Yeah, for sure. And, you know, we, we definitely were different people. I'll say 230 00:21:55,920 --> 00:22:02,320 this. We, so we decided, you know, we're going to go meet up at Firehouse, which happens to be like 231 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:06,000 neither one of our wives like Firehouse. So what it's just Chris and I like a lot of times will 232 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,920 still go to Firehouse. So I don't, I don't know. I didn't think we were going to start something 233 00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:16,160 like that. But hey, there it is. So we, we go to Firehouse and you know, we're talking about us. 234 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:22,320 And I just remember, like I called my now wife, who was my girlfriend at the time. And, you know, 235 00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:26,960 I'm like, I don't know what to think about this, you know, like, I'm still thinking about the 236 00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:33,760 Chris from back then, right? And I'm sitting here thinking, you have that hard thought of like, 237 00:22:33,760 --> 00:22:37,920 you know, maybe I'm past that, right? Like even though he's reaching back out, 238 00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:45,840 am I past that, right? And will the, you know, and somewhat operating out of hurt too. But I 239 00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:50,320 just remember like sitting down and it was like we picked up when we left off. Like I just remember 240 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:56,400 being like, Oh, okay, it's, it's a new dynamic. But I don't even remember being, because I'll be 241 00:22:56,400 --> 00:23:00,480 honest, man, I was actually going to go in there and be like, here's how you hurt me. And here's 242 00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:05,600 how we need to, and that never really happened. Like we talked about that over time, don't get me 243 00:23:05,600 --> 00:23:09,840 wrong. But at the same time, it's like, none of that happened during that time. It was just like, 244 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:14,560 I know I, I know I apologize to you like events, but did I apologize? I don't remember. Did I 245 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:21,040 apologize to you? Oh yeah. No, absolutely you did. Like you apologized to me very, very early on, 246 00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:25,360 like you apologized to me very early on. And I apologize for a lot of my parts very early on 247 00:23:25,360 --> 00:23:31,200 too. But it was just, you know, there was a lot to unpack. Like, I mean, I even think about 248 00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:36,080 we still unpack some stuff sometimes, like we'll be talking about stuff and be like, Oh yeah, 249 00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:40,800 I forgot about that. Like what was that like from your perspective? And you know, none of it's 250 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:46,080 really sore stuff. It's just more, what were you going through? Because I had no clue. It just 251 00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:49,440 seemed very weird at the time or whatever. I don't know, man. It was just awesome. 252 00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:55,440 Yeah. Cause, cause you full on, you full on moved out of Lubbock. You moved around the, like the Austin area. 253 00:23:55,440 --> 00:24:01,200 And so like, it was different. And like, you know, I wasn't there when you met your wife or was dating 254 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:07,680 your wife. And Micah definitely missed my first, my first wedding when I got married the first time. 255 00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:14,320 But like going through that and like, but it was, it was hard for me, man, because like, 256 00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:19,680 a lot of the things that like I went through, like, yeah, I had friends and my ex-wife kind of controlled 257 00:24:20,720 --> 00:24:26,400 a lot of who my friends were. But like, I just remember being like, man, like, I didn't have a 258 00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:30,640 lot of friends that I could just trust, you know, like I had friends, but they were never like, Oh 259 00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:36,560 yeah, this is my brother. I know this person's got my back. And so it was, it was definitely hard 260 00:24:37,120 --> 00:24:42,480 for me, like going through all that, going through my dad passing away, going through, 261 00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:48,480 going through getting married and going through the divorce and all that stuff. And you know, 262 00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:56,000 because like after my official divorce, like my ex-wife and I were still in communication and 263 00:24:56,000 --> 00:25:01,520 Micah like helped me through that and helped me get over that. And he was actually the one that 264 00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:07,040 told me that my ex-wife was on Bumble or Tinder or whatever. So he was like, he was like, did you 265 00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:11,680 know that your ex-wife is on Bumble or Tinder? And like, again, we, we hadn't been, you know, 266 00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:18,400 we hadn't been that long gone. And like, I found out she was even on Christian like mingle while 267 00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:24,160 we were married. So it was like, why? Yeah, it was why. And so I digress and, you know, because I was 268 00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:28,160 with somebody at the time, how I found that out was actually through somebody else happened to be 269 00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:33,440 the guy I was staying with was single, right? So he was a single guy. He was on Bumble. And he was 270 00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:37,840 actually making fun of her. Like he was like, Hey, look at this, look at this person. Because her 271 00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:42,400 bile was kind of goofy and like the picture she chose was kind of goofy. And so he was like, 272 00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:47,760 roasting her pretty much. And I'm like, Oh my God, I know who that is. Yeah. And it's like, 273 00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:52,480 it's Chris's ex-wife. Was it, was that kind of like a shock to you where you're like, Oh my gosh. 274 00:25:53,120 --> 00:26:00,160 Yeah, especially because we had just, that was right. I mean, it was right after like I had seen 275 00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:05,840 you at United. Like, I mean, maybe a day or two after. And I knew because we, you know, had, 276 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:10,080 of course, because I had researched you knew you were going through a divorce prior to, and I think 277 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:14,640 we had kind of talked about it, United like, yeah, like her and I are getting divorced. I think we 278 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:23,520 had kind of talked about it. But yeah, it was, it just happened to, it just happened to be, but I 279 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:28,640 was just, I knew that you guys were talking, right? And I knew that you guys were thinking about 280 00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:34,160 reconciling or trying to make something, it was kind of an interesting situation, right? 281 00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:41,600 And then seeing that it's like, Oh, he needs to know because if she's dating around and he's 282 00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:46,640 still thinking that, you know, there's a shot and that it's just him, you know, that's something he 283 00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:51,840 needs to know. Well, the crazy thing was, and this was like probably a month after that happened, 284 00:26:51,840 --> 00:26:55,920 I was like, you know what, like, I'll give it a shot. I'll give the dating apps a try. And like, 285 00:26:55,920 --> 00:27:05,360 I tried and like, like, I saw her on like, I think it was Bumble or whatever. And I remember, like, 286 00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:11,280 she called me probably, it was, this was like within like, probably 10 minutes of me like 287 00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:14,560 making my profile. And she like called me, it was like, what are you doing on Bumble? 288 00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:19,280 Like, I thought you were trying to record. And I'm like, what are you doing on there? 289 00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:24,720 What are you doing there? It was wild, man. But like, I'm just curious to know, 290 00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:31,680 I'm just curious to like know your thoughts. So like, after you like saw me and like a couple 291 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:36,080 of days, were you mad? Were you upset? Were you just kind of confused? Were you like, 292 00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:40,480 okay, cool? Like, like, what were you feeling like during that time? 293 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:46,560 So it's hard. The way that I would describe it and the way that I talked with, with, 294 00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:53,040 you know, my wife and about it was at first seeing you was like seeing a ghost. And reason 295 00:27:53,040 --> 00:27:58,400 being is because Chris and I had such a close relationship. There were so many inside jokes. 296 00:27:58,400 --> 00:28:02,720 There were so many things, there were so many things, you know, stuff that happened over the 297 00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:07,520 years that you're like, you want to turn to Chris and say, Oh, yeah, you know, this, remember this, 298 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:12,720 this and this, or tell an inside joke or something like that. And you realize like, he's not there. 299 00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:16,960 Right. And you can't just call him up or whatever. So in essence, it's almost like I 300 00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:21,040 got almost like you died. And that's how I saw it was like, not necessarily like, Oh, 301 00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:25,920 you're dead to me. But like, Oh, you're dead to me. That part of my life is died. Like you're 302 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:30,640 like, Oh, that part of my life. And I told my wife and everything I said, I choose to remember the 303 00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:36,480 good parts and not like towards the end. Right. I don't, I don't like thinking about towards the end. 304 00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:41,600 I just want to think about how good of a friendship we had. And you know, I was happy with it's like, 305 00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:46,400 most people don't have a best friend like that. I had one for years and through my childhood. 306 00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:50,960 And you know, maybe childhood friends just don't last. And you know, maybe that's the truth of it. 307 00:28:50,960 --> 00:28:55,600 And that sort of thing. When I saw you, it was like, that was the words that I described it as. 308 00:28:55,600 --> 00:29:01,520 It's like, man, it's like I saw a ghost just now. It's like, man, I, it's, it brought back a whole 309 00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:06,560 bunch of different feelings. Right. It was just like, man, I was, I was mad because it's just like, 310 00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:12,160 the way that we had left it off. I, you know, I didn't say this. The last time I actually talked 311 00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:17,760 to you was right before I said I was going to go off to this university. And I remember I came to 312 00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:21,520 one of the grocery stores, one of the locations you were working at and like, 313 00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:25,120 tracked you down and like told you before I left, that was actually the last 314 00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:30,080 time I think we talked before then. And that was like months, months into it. Wasn't it? I mean, 315 00:29:30,080 --> 00:29:36,080 that was always into. Yeah, I think it was. It was months, months. And so I'm not, I'm not going 316 00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:40,960 to get mad because again, it's in the past and bygones are going to be bygones. But I'm curious, 317 00:29:40,960 --> 00:29:45,760 like, was your wife like, okay, like, no, like, don't have anything to do with this guy or 318 00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:51,360 support. Okay, cool. Just be cautious. I'll support you no matter what or like, how did she feel 319 00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:58,560 about all of it? So she was, she was supportive on my side. She, I don't think she really ever, 320 00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:04,480 she didn't think it was right. Some of the things, but at the same time, I don't think she really knew 321 00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:13,280 about it. And I mean, immediately, whatever I told her, like, hey, I saw him and we're going to have 322 00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:17,920 a meal. She was like, what do you think about it? And, you know, I told her, I said, 323 00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:24,880 I don't know. But, you know, I'm thinking, you know, we give it another shot kind of thing. And I 324 00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:29,680 I see here, what he has to say, and we can just kind of talk it out and see. But and then I also 325 00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:35,680 told her on the same caveat, like, but if they're if I see some same tendencies from back then or 326 00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:42,240 something like that, it's just like, some things that I've grown out of, right? Like, I'm not, 327 00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:46,480 I don't want to put you on blast. But like Chris of the past, I'm trying to describe it. 328 00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:52,400 How do I describe it? Like, there was just some things that just say it. I don't. But the thing 329 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:57,200 is, I don't know how to describe it. Like, it's a feeling, not necessarily a, you know what I mean? 330 00:30:57,200 --> 00:31:02,640 Was it more like a, like, oh, every time I hang out with this guy, he's going to be holding me back 331 00:31:02,640 --> 00:31:08,960 and it's going to make me feel like I'm 15 again, instead of 20, whatever. Is that what you, what 332 00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:13,840 you were kind of like, oh, if this guy, all he wants to do is be stuck in the past, then I'm just 333 00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:18,880 going to not like, or is it like, I tell you, I tell you what, so we're going to go into a little 334 00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:25,280 something else too. I tried to build the grit, the Chris Void of friendship with another person, 335 00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:32,160 right? Like I gained another quote unquote best friend at the time. And I thought everything was 336 00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:39,920 okay. But you know, he was one of those very deceptive manipulative types as well. Unfortunately, 337 00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:45,120 Chris and I have fallen into that a few times because that's what we were used to at certain 338 00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:50,720 points. But anyways, so I didn't realize that he was kind of jerking me around. And one of the 339 00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:56,560 beliefs that I had at the time, because I had just gotten this new job, I had somewhat of status, 340 00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:03,520 right? This, this other guy that was my friend at the time who I was staying with, he had a very 341 00:32:03,520 --> 00:32:09,360 lowly view of other people. In fact, when I told him about you, like, because he knew about you, 342 00:32:09,360 --> 00:32:13,840 like I told him how like we had stopped being friends and stuff and all this other stuff, right? 343 00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:19,520 And he full on said, like, why do you want to be friends with this loser? He works at a grocery 344 00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:26,160 store, like he's getting divorced, he's a loser, right? And I wouldn't say that I fully believe 345 00:32:26,160 --> 00:32:31,520 that. That's not what I thought. But at the same token, I am sitting here going, you know, I'm, 346 00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:37,600 I'm trying to work hard, have this whole thing, you know, you know, I had almost that feeling of 347 00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:42,480 if he's not going to be doing something with his life, like, do I even bother kind of thing? 348 00:32:42,480 --> 00:32:48,720 Because I want to do something with my life, if that makes sense. And, and I didn't know if that 349 00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:54,480 was the case, because it, you know, when the note that we left off, the Chris that I knew the note 350 00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:59,360 that we left off was very lost, like you didn't know what the hell you were doing. I'll be honest, 351 00:32:59,360 --> 00:33:04,240 like, I knew none of us did. I didn't know what the hell you're doing. But same time, it's like, 352 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:09,840 we didn't know, you know, I had, I had dreams to be a pilot and things didn't work out. I'm still 353 00:33:09,840 --> 00:33:15,200 working on that, right? We're going to make that dream come true. But at the same time, Chris, 354 00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:20,880 you had dreams and aspirations to do some things. But at this point in life, it was like, 355 00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:28,400 I don't, and here was another, this is, it's hard because it's like, bro, you're my friend, 356 00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:33,840 I want to talk like this. But at the same time, it's like, I was also thinking about you wanted 357 00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:38,080 to be a police officer, right? That didn't work out. That didn't work out. There was a lot of 358 00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:43,840 things that you wanted to do that didn't necessarily work out, right? And so it's one of those things 359 00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:49,840 of if he's not going to follow through with things and do hard things in life and follow through 360 00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:54,720 with it, because that was what I was all about at the time, right? It was getting those hard things, 361 00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:59,840 getting that next position, getting the whatever. And you know, you actually help bring me out of 362 00:33:59,840 --> 00:34:07,200 that because saying, okay, I'm going to give him a shot and everything. I sat down with you. And 363 00:34:07,200 --> 00:34:12,080 that was one of the first things that struck me is, bro, what am I doing? Like just talking to 364 00:34:12,080 --> 00:34:17,360 you, I was like, what am I doing? This guy's job doesn't matter. This guy's status doesn't matter. 365 00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:21,760 What he's doing doesn't. He's doing the best that he can. But I shouldn't, I shouldn't judge this guy, 366 00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:25,920 you know, like, I'm sitting here going, this is, this is Chris, he's a good man, 367 00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:30,560 and good people can be in any profession and do any sort of thing. It doesn't matter about the money 368 00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:36,320 or the status or whatever. And I was kind of lost by that at that moment. But you kind of helped 369 00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:43,760 reground me. And in fact, at that point, I was already kind of out of that, coming out of that 370 00:34:43,760 --> 00:34:48,720 friendship as well, because of a lot of those things, because of the way that he thought about 371 00:34:48,720 --> 00:34:53,680 people and kind of trained me to it was all that like, if you want to be successful, you can't 372 00:34:53,680 --> 00:34:57,680 be hanging around with losers. And to a certain extent, that's true, right? Like you don't want 373 00:34:57,680 --> 00:35:02,800 to be hanging around with bums who don't have jobs and, you know, or hanging around all the time and 374 00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:07,600 just drinking and party. And like, that is very true. But that's not what Chris was doing. You 375 00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:11,360 know what I mean? That's not what Chris was doing. And that's not what Chris was about at all. And in 376 00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:16,320 fact, he was striving for better. And he was just in an in between place, right? That's like the 377 00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:21,520 moment we talked, I identified you as being like, you're in a hard spot, you're in an in between 378 00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:26,480 place, trying to get to where you want to be. And so it's like, why would I judge somebody for that? 379 00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:31,280 You know, and that it that conversation in Firehouse, it was really quick, all that just kind 380 00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:37,120 of dropped. Like, I don't have any concerns about that anymore. I'll kind of add my my end of the 381 00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:45,360 conversation. But I do you feel like that, like that friend that you had and your paternal unit 382 00:35:45,360 --> 00:35:49,920 was encouraging you to be where you're just like, Oh, I'm just looking for the next position. Do you 383 00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:54,880 feel like that was a lot of your influence or you were like trying to prove something to them? 384 00:35:54,880 --> 00:36:02,320 Prove something. I also think that it's, it's very easy to get on these kicks where you're like, 385 00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:07,440 Okay, this person successful, I'm gonna you're looking for mentors, right? And that's a very, 386 00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:13,360 you got to be very careful with that. You got to be very careful of who you because there's a lot 387 00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:19,040 of people who are charismatic, but they don't have the right ideas, right? It sounds great in 388 00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:23,840 theory. But and maybe that works for them in their life, but you have to find out what works for you 389 00:36:23,840 --> 00:36:28,000 in your life. And I was trying to live their life and what worked for them in their life. 390 00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:33,600 And not mine. And I'm and anybody that knows me personally, and I feel like if you listen to the 391 00:36:33,600 --> 00:36:40,240 podcast this whole time, you know, you know me to a certain extent to know that, you know, I don't 392 00:36:40,240 --> 00:36:45,920 know what I'm trying to say. The one thing from my side, I was kind of like, going in with it like, 393 00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:52,080 okay, like, let's try to, you know, give it another shot, our friendship another shot. And so I was, 394 00:36:52,080 --> 00:37:00,640 I was expecting the, the mica that was attention seeking and had to be in the spotlight. And also 395 00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:08,800 the, the mica that was going to be like, oh, yeah, let's go like, let's go play ding dong ditch and 396 00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:17,520 like, take a dump in people's yards and all that stuff. That would be kind of egging you on. And 397 00:37:17,520 --> 00:37:26,960 so, but I, when I just had kind of talked with you and you were talking about how your parental 398 00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:33,600 units didn't, like, you were kind of distancing yourself from your parental units and kind of how 399 00:37:34,000 --> 00:37:40,160 you had to like, you, you kind of like had to experience some hard knocks, man, and like, just 400 00:37:40,160 --> 00:37:44,400 kind of how you were talking about like, how your parental units didn't help you with college and 401 00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:49,040 you know, gone through a whole thing with, with that flight school and everything. I was like, man, 402 00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:54,080 this guy like has gotten some life experience and like, I feel like it's kind of matured him and 403 00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:58,640 you weren't that same person that was like, oh yeah, I got to have the spotlight, nor am I 404 00:37:58,640 --> 00:38:02,800 that person that's trying to be like my parental units. And I think that was my biggest concern 405 00:38:02,800 --> 00:38:09,760 that you were trying to be like them. And so I was like, okay, like, you know, let me talk with 406 00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:14,800 this guy. And again, we've talked about this, like our friendship is so much better because, 407 00:38:16,720 --> 00:38:21,200 because like on the other side of it, when we're going through a rough time or we're 408 00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:26,800 going or dealing with someone that's difficult, we're helping each other, not egging each other to 409 00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:32,720 like, go give them the middle finger or to like slash their tires and we're encouraging each other 410 00:38:32,720 --> 00:38:38,240 to be better and to rise above that level. Whereas like 15, 14 year old us be like, yeah, 411 00:38:38,240 --> 00:38:46,080 dude, just take a dump on his lawn and call his wife up and dude. And so I don't know how to 412 00:38:46,080 --> 00:38:51,920 explain it, but yeah, I mean, I was like, for sure, like, I wasn't going to like say anything 413 00:38:51,920 --> 00:38:57,200 when you walked in, but I was like, no, like you need to like, you need to not be a coward and you 414 00:38:57,200 --> 00:39:02,400 need to like go up and say something to my felt that very strong urge to go up and say something 415 00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:06,880 to you. And I was like, man, like, and then we had that meeting at firehouse and you were like, 416 00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:10,880 you were like, man, like just let's just go take a drive. And I was just like, oh, okay, 417 00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:17,360 because I don't think you were expecting like for us to have a good meeting and everything. And so 418 00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:22,320 even if we did, I was only expecting it to be the meal, right? I was expecting it to be the meal, 419 00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:25,920 then we would kind of go our separate ways and you know, okay, I'll probably see him down the 420 00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:31,360 road. But it was by the time we were done at firehouse and had to hashed a lot of that stuff 421 00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:36,720 out, I was just like, bro, we got a lot to catch up on. That's the main bit. It's like, I got to 422 00:39:36,720 --> 00:39:40,880 tell you about all this stuff because you know, what he's talking about with my parental units 423 00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:46,960 and things like that, there was that and so much more like there was so much stuff that had happened 424 00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:52,480 in those five years. And you know, not just not just in our personal lives, but people we knew, 425 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:57,040 you know, people we knew from church back in Georgia and everything else, a lot of people that, 426 00:39:57,040 --> 00:40:02,640 you know, so much stuff changes in five years, right? And that was part of the hard part. And 427 00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:10,480 what I was really happy about with, you know, giving it a go again was just the fact that I can, 428 00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:17,600 you know, if I talked with my wife, who was then my girlfriend about certain people, right, 429 00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:20,880 I'm trying to think of some of the people we talked on the show about some people, right, 430 00:40:20,880 --> 00:40:25,600 you know, one-eyed Stan or whatever, right? She's not gonna know one-eyed Stan. She's gonna be like, 431 00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:30,480 that's great honey. And like, she'll listen to me, but there's no connection because she 432 00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:35,120 don't know what I, she's not, she wasn't there, you know, but Chris was there. Chris was there 433 00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:39,760 and knows. And so there's a lot of things that was like, oh man, you know, these experiences 434 00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:45,680 happened and reminiscing, but then also talking about a lot of the other stuff that had happened 435 00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:52,160 in the meantime. Well, you also had to catch me up too because during that whole time where I was 436 00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:57,920 with my ex-wife, even dating, like she, like she basically made me get rid of my Facebook. 437 00:40:57,920 --> 00:41:05,680 And so I was, I was disconnected from the world for a good five years, dude. And you want to, 438 00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:11,280 like, you want to talk about like something that's eye-opening or like shock, like I was like, 439 00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:16,320 I wasn't in prison, but I could only imagine what it's like, like coming out and then finally 440 00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:22,160 learning all this, like I found out that one of my classmates committed suicide in 2016. And I 441 00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:28,160 didn't find that out until 2019. Like I didn't know that. And it was someone that I knew really well. 442 00:41:28,160 --> 00:41:33,760 And I was just like, oh my gosh, like I had no, and so like, I was like, this happened three years 443 00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:39,920 ago and I'm grieving this like three years later because I just found out. And so there were so 444 00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:45,280 many things that I didn't know. And Micah had to catch me up on. And so I was like, oh, like, 445 00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:50,080 and he was like, you remember this person? Do you know that did, and I was like, no, I had no 446 00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:56,240 idea. Cause at that point, I just recently got a Facebook and an Instagram after I got divorced. 447 00:41:56,240 --> 00:42:00,960 Yeah. So it was, it was a very interesting. It's like, bro, we got to talk it. And I don't know, 448 00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:07,440 man, driving around that was, I was really happy. That was one of the happiest I had been in a while 449 00:42:07,440 --> 00:42:14,960 to that point, just because it was, I don't know, man. The other friendship wasn't ever right. 450 00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:20,240 Right. It was, I was always trying to make another crisp, but that's not how it was going to work. 451 00:42:20,240 --> 00:42:27,520 It's only one of you. And you know, it was, we needed that time though. And I think we 452 00:42:27,520 --> 00:42:33,600 agreed to that, right? That we both needed that time to step away, have our experiences, 453 00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:37,920 our life experiences, because I didn't just experience hard knocks. I know you experienced 454 00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:42,160 hard knocks too. Like, I mean, you experienced a lot obviously with the divorce, but there was a 455 00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:48,320 lot of other things in between there as well. And, you know, it shaped us into who we are today. 456 00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:53,120 I'm glad, I'm going to stop here too. I'm glad that you had the courage enough to come say 457 00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:58,720 something to me because, hey man, this podcast might be not happening, right? And it might be 458 00:42:58,720 --> 00:43:06,800 longer than five years to this point. But, you know, it's crazy to think about the fact that we've 459 00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:12,640 been, you know, back, back talking and back real close for, you know, since 2020 now. 460 00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:22,720 Yeah. I mean, and again, most of it was like dumb kid stuff. And like both of us, we went through some, 461 00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:30,400 I wouldn't call them traumatic as much for me, but definitely Michael for sure, traumatic things. 462 00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:35,040 And like as a kid, it was just kind of like, oh, like, yeah, bro sucks that you went through that. 463 00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:40,080 But as an adult, like you can help each other process things and help keep each other centered 464 00:43:40,080 --> 00:43:44,000 and like thinking back some of the stuff. I'm like, man, I should have called the cops like, 465 00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:50,160 but you know, like you're a 12 year old kid and you don't know any better. You don't know anything. 466 00:43:50,160 --> 00:43:55,360 And so it's like, and we didn't, we didn't also know, we thought that was normal. I mean, as 467 00:43:55,360 --> 00:44:00,640 bad as it is to say, you think all that stuff is normal. What are you going to do? Right? Anyways, 468 00:44:00,640 --> 00:44:07,840 it's, it was just crazy times. It's, it's crazy to think back about a lot of that stuff. And it 469 00:44:07,840 --> 00:44:13,360 really, you know, I'm glad that we went through it as hard as it was. But you know, again, we came 470 00:44:13,360 --> 00:44:19,680 out the other side. And if we didn't go through that hiatus, you know, I don't know. Again, I don't 471 00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:25,840 know how it would have turned out. And I think it everything went according to plan. Kind of going 472 00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:31,920 back. And again, I'm not trying to make this about my divorce, but Michael was talking about 473 00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:38,560 that time where, you know, me and my ex wife were still possibly thinking about reconciling. 474 00:44:39,040 --> 00:44:44,560 And I remember, I remember telling her that like me and you were friends again and bro, 475 00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:51,680 she like, she flipped her lid. And it was crazy. I remember thinking like, Christopher, if you 476 00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:56,560 go this route, like you're going to have to make a decision between your best friend and her. Like, 477 00:44:56,560 --> 00:45:01,200 you're going to have to make that decision. And I remember I like made it in my heart. I was like, 478 00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:06,800 I'm not going to pick her over my best friend again. Like, and I remember like really and truly 479 00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:12,400 being like, you know what, like my best friend is what's most important to me. And that was kind of 480 00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:17,440 the deciding factor, not to be gay or nothing, but like, but, but I just remember being like, I 481 00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:22,560 know for sure that it's, it's not going to work to have both. I knew that I couldn't have both in 482 00:45:22,560 --> 00:45:27,360 my life. And I was like, man, I was like, I'm not going to throw my best friend to the wolves again. 483 00:45:27,360 --> 00:45:33,840 I'm not going to, I'm not going to do that. And so, and I'm glad I'm glad that I chose not to do 484 00:45:33,840 --> 00:45:40,960 that, man. And therapy helped a lot. I will tell you, therapy helped me tremendously. But I, and 485 00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:45,600 I remember us going to Paladero Canyon. And I remember you just having that conversation with 486 00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:50,480 me and you were like, man, like I'll support you no matter what. And I remember just being like, 487 00:45:50,480 --> 00:45:54,000 no, like I can't, like I can't give up this friendship. Like I'm sorry. 488 00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:58,320 Yeah. And I remember you telling me and about how she flipped her lid and everything. And, 489 00:45:58,320 --> 00:46:03,040 you know, it was a concern for me. It's like, man, what if this happens again and whatnot? And, 490 00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:08,160 but at the same time, how I felt about it in that conversation that I told you was, was, 491 00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:14,160 I felt that way. It's like, I was willing to even give her a second chance. Like even if it was 492 00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:18,480 even if she was mad to begin with, it's like, it's Chrissie's that I'm a different person. I can 493 00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:24,480 show her I'm a different person too. And if that's what it takes, fine. Right. And I was willing to 494 00:46:24,480 --> 00:46:29,520 to try it out even, right? Like it's like, even if they do give back, I would be willing to try it 495 00:46:29,520 --> 00:46:36,000 out. And it was, it wasn't even just you, bro. Cause here's also a thing. I wasn't allowed to do 496 00:46:36,000 --> 00:46:40,480 anything. So you couldn't even go to McDonald's. What are you talking about? I couldn't even go 497 00:46:40,480 --> 00:46:45,280 to McDonald's because she'd be like, Oh, you've worked with the wait or the cashier worker. They 498 00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:49,440 don't have waitresses there. You've worked with the cashier worker. And I'm like, nah, I'm just 499 00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:52,320 going to McDonald's. She'd be like, Oh, why do you go to that? When do you know somebody that 500 00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:56,880 worked there? Bro, it was always fights over the stupidest stuff. But like, she didn't want me to 501 00:46:56,880 --> 00:47:02,320 play video games. Like she did not want to date a guy that played video games. And I, I, unless 502 00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:09,120 you live under a rock, like 95% of guys play video games, some kind of video games. And here's 503 00:47:09,120 --> 00:47:14,000 the thing, like I wouldn't even play that much. Like I wouldn't play as much as a lot of people. 504 00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:19,920 And so I remember when she found out that I got a PlayStation. Oh, bro, she flipped her 505 00:47:19,920 --> 00:47:26,160 life. She was upset. Yeah, she got, huh? About the PlayStation. Yeah. Cause she was like, she was 506 00:47:26,160 --> 00:47:31,520 like, Oh, she, she was like, Oh, so you're just going to be one of those video gamer guys that, 507 00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:37,120 that doesn't want to make time for his girlfriend and da, da, da, da, da, da, da. And bro, she would 508 00:47:37,120 --> 00:47:42,800 bro, she would keep reeling me in because she would, she would change her behavior just enough 509 00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:49,120 to think that I, that's for me to think that she had changed. But then whenever we had an argument 510 00:47:49,120 --> 00:47:54,560 or something, it would go right back to how it was. And I just remember being like, dude, what 511 00:47:54,560 --> 00:47:59,920 am I doing? Like it's time to just peace out. Like it's time to take care of me. And so being on the 512 00:47:59,920 --> 00:48:05,360 other side of that and Michael really helped and definitely during COVID. I mean, I think, 513 00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:11,760 because that year 2020, Michael went through a lot of crazy stuff. And I remember just taking 514 00:48:11,760 --> 00:48:17,360 drives out to the middle of nowhere, like in Bluette, New Mexico and just talking because like, 515 00:48:18,240 --> 00:48:23,200 because Michael just had a lot going on. We both had a lot going on. And so it was just nice. 516 00:48:24,560 --> 00:48:29,520 And there was this place called Bluette, New Mexico. And I promise you, it is like, if you blink, 517 00:48:29,520 --> 00:48:34,960 you'll miss it. I promise you, like there is, there was like one building out there and it's in 518 00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:40,240 the middle of this. And it's, it's somebody's farmer's field. It's the middle of a dirt, like, 519 00:48:40,240 --> 00:48:47,040 not dirt road, but a pavement. And I promise you, no, like electricity, power lines, no, 520 00:48:47,040 --> 00:48:52,160 nothing, you can't hear anything. Like you can yell whatever you want and it doesn't echo. 521 00:48:52,160 --> 00:48:57,840 It's just, it's that, it's a big void of space. So we would go out there and I'm sure whoever's 522 00:48:57,840 --> 00:49:02,720 farmer was in that house got to hear some weird things getting yelled. But you know, there, 523 00:49:02,720 --> 00:49:08,160 that's something else too, living over there. You would, I would have such bad days to be like, 524 00:49:08,160 --> 00:49:11,680 Chris, I need to get out of the time zone because the time zone changes when you go to 525 00:49:11,680 --> 00:49:16,160 New Mexico. And so it's like, we would travel to New Mexico and be like, yep, that's how you know 526 00:49:16,160 --> 00:49:21,200 it's a bad day when it's like, man, I need to get out of the time zone. But yeah, those, those are 527 00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:26,240 crazy times, man. But you know, I'm glad that we got through them. I'm glad that we got through them. 528 00:49:26,240 --> 00:49:32,160 And but yeah, man, I'm good to call it an episode if you are, I think that sums up a lot of it. 529 00:49:32,160 --> 00:49:41,600 And yeah, crazy times. Chris and I, he commuted Kato five whole years. But you know what? I think 530 00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:46,160 the last few, you know, we've been, we've been stronger than ever friendship wise. It's been, 531 00:49:46,160 --> 00:49:53,760 it's been really great. Obviously we've started a podcast and, you know, we had tvtrashcan.com for 532 00:49:53,760 --> 00:50:00,960 two years. And we got, well, we got, we both got married, not to each other. Yeah, no, no, to, 533 00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:07,200 to women, to ladies, to women, to our wives. What else happened? There's some other stuff 534 00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:13,040 that happened. That's another episode. I moved back out of Lubbock. So yeah, you moved out of Lubbock. 535 00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:22,720 I mean, it's just wild. Oh, I changed jobs, changed careers. Hey, shout out to chasing your dreams, 536 00:50:22,720 --> 00:50:27,920 man. You know, I kind of go back to what I was talking about before of what I was worried about 537 00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:32,400 about you not falling through this man followed through, because if there is anything that's 538 00:50:32,400 --> 00:50:37,040 been consistent in his life, he's felt called to ministry and that's been from the beginning, 539 00:50:37,040 --> 00:50:42,080 no matter what other jobs he's wanted to have, he's known that he's been called to ministry. 540 00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:45,840 And now he's made that his profession. So shout out to you for making your dreams come true, 541 00:50:45,840 --> 00:50:52,640 dude, because it was a struggle for a bit. It was a long road. I had, I promise you, 542 00:50:52,640 --> 00:50:59,760 there was a straight, solid year. I had, I'm, I'm kidding you not, probably 20 interviews. 543 00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:05,760 And one year all knows it was bad. It was like, all no, no, no, no, but oh, and not just, 544 00:51:05,760 --> 00:51:10,800 you kept trying. Well, and let's not even, let's talk about this. You kept trying. There was 20 545 00:51:10,800 --> 00:51:15,760 interviews that were no, no, no, and you were trying to go grocery store wise and try to get 546 00:51:15,760 --> 00:51:19,920 another position, a higher position or a different position. And how many interviews did you have 547 00:51:19,920 --> 00:51:25,920 at the same time for them? You had a ton of interviews for them. So it was like, it was like, 548 00:51:25,920 --> 00:51:30,560 he was trying to get one or the other, but man, you made it happen. So congrats to you. 549 00:51:30,560 --> 00:51:35,040 But yeah, man, I think it's been a heck of an episode. And this is the part where I would be 550 00:51:35,040 --> 00:51:41,840 like TV trash can.com. We got that website no more. So we're over here at trash can network 551 00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:47,920 at trash can network over here on Facebook, Instagram, we ain't on X, but you know what, 552 00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:52,720 we're everywhere else that you're listening and wherever you're listening from, we do appreciate 553 00:51:52,720 --> 00:51:57,520 all across the world. That's something else too, man. We made an international podcast since then. 554 00:51:57,520 --> 00:52:03,760 We, we walked so we could run. That's right. We walked so we could run. So anyways, man, 555 00:52:03,760 --> 00:52:07,760 I'm ready to take this donut box out to the trash few off. Yep, let's sign off. All right, man. 556 00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:13,920 I'm Michael. I'm Chris. And you have been listening to a very special friendship hiatus episode of 557 00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:17,920 the donut box podcast and Q Jefferson starship. 558 00:52:43,920 --> 00:52:47,920 Oh, it's just another Sunday.