Some people think that they have dynamic personalities
because they're always exploding, but that isn't
the case. But anger is a powerful emotion which
consumes tremendous energy. Some of the most
exhausted people you'll ever meet are those who
are repressing or suppressing deep -seated anger
that they have held in check for a long time.
It requires so much of their personal energy
that they live life exhausted. Anger can be destructive
and they know that and so they hold it in check.
Someone has said anger is an acid that can do
more harm to the vessel in which it is stored
than do anything on which it is poured. Because
we have trouble handling our anger, it's likely
that most of us at one time or another, or perhaps
regularly, have prayed for patience. Maybe that
was your New Year's resolution, to be more patient
in 1993. How's it going? Patience is a wonderful
thing because the more you use of it, the more
you have. Patience is a virtue that requires
a lot of weight, w -a -i -t. Developing patience
may be difficult and is difficult, but understanding
the effects of anger makes it desirable despite
its difficulty. Proverbs has something to tell
us regarding patience and anger. First, let's
note from Proverbs some observations about an
angry person. There are five of them, as you
will note on your outline. The first one is that
the angry person behaves foolishly. Proverbs
14 and verse 17 says, a quick -tempered man does
foolish things, and a crafty man is hated. Verse
29, says, a patient man has great understanding,
but a quick -tempered man displays folly. The
angry person behaves foolishly. That's the first
observation. Now we see that in life. We don't
have to go to Proverbs to see this, but God's
Word underscores the truthfulness of it. And
all of us have not only seen it, we've seen it
up real close. because we've done it. You will
notice that there is a contrast in the last verse
I read between the quick -tempered man and the
patient man. Literally, the Hebrew says here,
the short -nosed and the long -nosed man. There's
a play on words because the word nose and the
word anger in the Hebrew come from the same word.
Same route. The link between them seems to be
that the angry person snorts. He is seen as snorting
in anger. Now have you ever heard a person snort
in anger? Now I would perhaps try to do that
if I didn't have a cold. Could be dangerous.
There is a contrast between the one who is short
-nosed and who snorts real quick, and the one
who is long -nosed, who is patient, and he says
here the short -nosed, snorting man is one who
behaves foolishly. In chapter 12 and verse 16,
we see that anger is a hallmark of a fool. A
fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent
man overlooks and insults. The prudent man knows
how to field insults that come his direction.
He's able to take them in stride, but not the
fool. He immediately shows his annoyance and
becomes angry. On the other hand, in chapter
29 and verse 11, we see that the calm anger is
a mark of wisdom. If the fool displays his anger
immediately, the wise man is one who is able
to calm his anger. 29, 11 says, a fool gives
full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps
himself under control. So that his behavior,
his reactions to insults and offenses are tempered.
Under control. and not explosive. The first observation
about an angry person is that he behaves foolishly.
The second observation is that the angry person
stirs up trouble. We're in chapter 29, look at
verse 22. An angry man stirs up dissension and
a hot -tempered one commits many sins. A person
who is angry is one who stirs up trouble wherever
he goes. There may be coals that are lying almost
out in dormant in a situation, and before he's
done he has stirred up those coals and fanned
new flames into the problem. Chapter 30 verse
32 says, if you have played the fool and exalted
yourself, or if you have planned evil, clap your
hand over your mouth. Now don't do that please.
This is just saying that. For as churning the
milk produces butter, and as twisting the nose
produces blood, so stirring up anger produces
strife. An angry person likes to stir up anger.
He gets his jollies from that. Whether it be
his own anger or the anger of other people, he
likes to get others involved in it. He stirs
up trouble wherever he goes. The word hot head
or hot tempered, however yours may be translated,
means venomous. It's the very same Hebrew word,
venomous. It's used that way in Psalm 58 and
verse 4. The idea is that when this person is
enraged he is threatening he is venomous He causes
trouble Heard a story one time about a man who
was talking with an atheist friend of his and
The atheist friend was denying the Bible is true
He said there's not a word in the Bible is true
and went back and forth and finally this this
fellow got a little Angry about it And he reached
up to his atheist friend's nose and gave it a
hard twist and it began to bleed. And he said,
I want you to know that proves the Bible is true
because it says the twisting of the nose produces
blood. As well as that is true, so does stirring
up anger produce strife. The second observation
is that the angry person stirs up trouble. To
strive for peace on the other hand is a mark
of wisdom Rt. Archibald said blessed are the
peacemakers that is those who carry about with
them an atmosphere in which quarrels die a natural
death Is that the atmosphere that you carry through
your week Where quarrels die a natural death
Just as when you put a flame into a vacuum it
goes out. There's nothing there you see for it
to continue to burn on. There's no combustion
that can take place. God help us to be those
kinds of peacemakers that enter into a room where
there's tension or who touch a relationship where
there is combat and we bring there the end of
the anger. The third observation we see of the
angry man in Proverbs is that he learns the hard
way. Chapter 19 and verse 19. A hot tempered
man must pay the penalty. If you rescue him,
you will have to do it again. The hot tempered
person, the angry man, will not listen to counsel.
He knows better. You can't tell him anything.
He will not listen. So therefore when he gets
into trouble, says Proverbs, let him pay the
penalty. Let him suffer the consequences of his
anger. Because if you go in and try to rescue
him, you will simply short circuit the process.
and you'll have to rescue him again and again
and again. He'll never learn his lesson. It's
counterproductive to bail out of his problems
an angry man because his ungoverned temper will
land him in fresh trouble over and over. The
mark of wisdom is to listen to counsel. and to
learn from it and not to have to learn the hard
way. I suppose that all of us have gone through
periods in our lives when we have been like this
angry person who will not listen to somebody
else and I am sure that we could have scores
of testimonies of people here who could say here
are the consequences in my life because I would
not listen in my anger. Avoid that. The fourth
lesson is that the, or observation rather, is
that the angry person endangers his own well
-being. Chapter 14 of Proverbs and verse 30.
A heart at peace gives life to the body but envy
rots the bones. Now the word envy here is translated
a number of different ways. Some translations
put it passion. What it's really talking about
is getting worked up about something. It's allowing
that type A personality behavior to be common
in your life. He says passion, getting worked
up about things easily, in danger is your own
well -being. It is self -destructive. Some people
get worked up about things and they scheme and
they plot how they're going to get back and get
revenge. They run the danger of a submarine in
World War II by the name of the U .S. Tang. It
surfaced under the cover of darkness to fire
in a large Japanese convoy, and it only had eight
of its torpedoes left because it had been involved
in warfare already. So the accuracy of every
shot was very important. The first seven of the
torpedoes, it is said, were right on target,
but when the eighth torpedo was launched, for
some reason it deviated from its path and headed
right back. at the submarine. Before the crew
could submerge and get out of its way, the torpedo
struck and within seconds the submarine sank,
taking all aboard to the bottom. That's the way
anger and revenge work. They are self -destructive.
The mental and emotional state that anger brings
adversely affects our health. To release the
negative emotions of anger in a healthy way,
however, brings vitality to the body. As it says
here, a heart at peace gives life to the body.
Do not be wise in your own eyes. Fear the Lord
and shun evil. This will bring health or medicine
to your body and nourishment to your bones. When
you and I harbor anger and resentment inside,
when we allow the lava of anger to boil inside
of us like we are a volcano that's kept, it will
eat away at the inside of us and destroy us physically.
The angry person endangers his own well -being.
Then there's a fifth observation that we make,
it is this, that the angry person leaves himself
vulnerable. Chapter 16 verse 32 says, being a
patient man, better a patient man than a warrior,
a man who controls his temper than one who takes
a city. Compare that with what is said in chapter
25 and verse 28. Like a city whose walls are
broken down is a man who lacks self -control.
The angry person leaves himself vulnerable just
like a city that has no walls to protect it.
He refuses the walls that self -restraint and
self -discipline raise up. He sees these as restrictions
to what he wants and how he feels. And so he
refuses to discipline his own emotions and then
the enemy comes and easily defeats him. The angry
person leaves himself vulnerable to perpetual
defeat. He has no defense. But to build the walls
of self -discipline and patience is to be a wise
person. When we do that the surges of angry emotions
are deflected They are channeled then into some
healthy direction and release and our lives are
protected From these observations we see the
dangers of being an angry person An angry person
is unbecoming disruptive, stubborn, injurious,
and vulnerable. Do you want to be that kind of
person? Well who could want to be? And yet some
of us are. Therefore let's move ahead and talk
about advice for one seeking to develop patience.
Because even if we are not angry people this
morning, all of us face the emotion of anger
from time to time in our lives. How do we develop
patience? Well, Proverbs gives us advice for
one who seeks to develop this godly quality in
his life. The first advice is, number one, avoid
relationships with angry persons. That seems
strange to you? It shouldn't. If you want to
develop patience in your life, avoid relationships
with angry persons. Chapter 22, verse 24. Do
not make friends with a hot -tempered man. Do
not associate with one easily angered or you
may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared."
So the first piece of advice is to avoid relationships
with people who are angry. It mentions directly
friendships. It's not that you're to be rude.
It's not that you can't work with them when you're
required to. But avoid becoming intimately associated
with someone who is angry, lest you pick up on
those habits. If you want to be patient, avoid
that trap. What about roommates? Sometimes you
have no choice about roommates, especially in
college. What about marriage? Once you're married,
It's too late. So what do you do when you are
already associated in a situation with someone
who's angry? When it's unavoidable, what do you
do then? I believe the Proverbs gives us a strong
word of advice, chapter 15, verse 1. A soft answer
turns away wrath. Grievous words stir up anger.
The counsel to someone who's already in a relationship
with an angry person is this Be gentle in your
responses to that person Don't unnecessarily
arouse the anger in him or in her Secondly, and
this is very important establish boundaries of
what's acceptable So that you don't become a
victim of the person's anger. There is never
a reason that a wife has to be abused by an angry
husband, physically abused. That is beyond any
kind of boundary the Word of God establishes.
There are other kinds of boundaries that need
to be set up and you need to set those up when
you are in an unavoidable relationship with an
angry person. If you don't, you will become a
victim. And if you're already a victim, seek
help. Go to someone who can help you, who can
backtrack with you as far as possible to lay
down some guidelines that will prevent you from
being victimized by an angry person. And then
thirdly, if you're in this kind of a relationship,
ask God to intervene. and to bring freedom to
your friend. Because you see there are few slaveries
worse than that of anger. Few slaveries destroy
like anger. So the best thing you can do for
your friend or your spouse is to pray for freedom
from that anger. And we'll talk a little bit
about that in a moment. But ask God to intervene,
not just for your sake, but for your friend's
sake because that life is in slavery and in bondage
until that anger is dealt with. So the first
piece of advice is, as much as you can, avoid
relationships with angry persons. Secondly, understand
the dynamics of sinful anger. Anger itself is
a God -given human emotion. It is not sinful.
It is not sinful in itself. But it can be expressed
wrongly. The flesh, you see, in us will arise
and use this emotion to express itself. Say,
what is the flesh? I understand the flesh in
a biblical sense, as we're using it now, to be
that pattern of behavior, attitudes, and responses
left over in us from who we were before we were
saved. It's a pattern of behavior, attitudes,
and responses left over in us from our old man.
who we were before our salvation. We're no longer
who we were. We're new creatures in Christ. But
our personalities are still stamped with some
of those same patterns that we learned and had
before. And sin still is a powerful force within
the believer. We're not obligated to obey it,
but it's still present. And it energizes the
flesh, this old pattern. So that when we come
into a situation where we have angry feelings,
that flesh seeks to rise up and say, channel
that anger this way. We have to understand the
dynamics of that. That's why we were told in
the New Testament to put away anger. It's talking
about that kind of anger, fleshly anger. Colossians
3 .8, for example, says, you must rid yourselves
of all such things as these, anger and rage.
And it goes on with the list. But notice it begins
with anger. Anger and rage. Ephesians 4 .31 says,
get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger. Get
rid of it. Be kind and compassionate to one another,
forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave
you. I want to come back to that in a moment.
But let me refer you to Galatians 5 19 which
says, the acts of the flesh are obvious. Hatred,
discord, jealousy, fits of rage. That's the flesh.
That's that pattern that belonged to the old
man that we were. that still seeks to find expression
in our lives though we are new creatures. That's
the flesh. Hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of
rage, and it goes on. But it says those who are
Jesus Christ have crucified the flesh with its
passions and desires. So we have to understand
the dynamic of sinful anger. Anger is a God -given
emotion, but the flesh is that in us which seeks
to usurp that energy and channel it in the wrong
way. And we are to get rid of that. We're to
put it off. We're to have nothing to do with
that because it does not represent any longer
who we are. The third piece of advice we see
in the Word of God is We're to walk in the spirits
liberating power to experience victory This is
not only with anger, but other things, but it
certainly is true of anger Walk in the spirits
liberating power to experience victory Since
anger is so powerful and emotion the flesh can
easily hijack it and use its energy for sinful
purposes so When we sense being angry we need
to be sure at that moment that we are under the
Holy Spirit's control We need to give him access
to our angry feelings and not cut him out When
we are angry at that moment that we're aware
of it we need to say Holy Spirit you take charge
of this anger And ask him then to release that
anger under his control He'll show you how to
do it It is not good to hold anger in, but it
has to be released in a godly way. And so in
Galatians 5 -16 it says this, walk in or walk
by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires
of the flesh. Does the flesh want to use anger
for its sinful purpose? Don't listen to it. Walk
by the power of the Spirit. and let the Spirit
channel that anger in a healthy way. Galatians
5 22 reminds us the fruit of the Spirit is love,
joy, peace, patience. Patience isn't something
that we just merely manufacture on our own. So
when we seek to develop it, we need to understand
that truly it is the fruit of the Holy Spirit's
work in us. Now we have to cooperate with Him.
He needs our willingness. He needs our surrender.
But if we give that to Him, He will develop patience
in us as His blessed fruit. So we're exhorted
in Galatians 5 .25, since we live by the Spirit,
let us keep in step with the Spirit. When we
allow the flesh to usurp our anger and channel
it in the wrong direction, we're out of step
with the Spirit of God. And so he says, just
stay in step. Keep yourselves in rank with the
Holy Spirit. And thus when you have any kind
of emotion, including that of anger, he will
be able to control that and use it for good.
So that brings me to the final question I've
jotted down on the outline. And I suppose the
answer should be obvious to you now. Is anger
ever justified? The answer is absolutely yes.
You can tell a lot about a person by seeing what
makes him laugh, by seeing what makes him cry,
and seeing what makes him angry. If you're dating
someone, look for those three things. If we do
not become angry about some things, there is
something wrong with us. Anger can be justified.
There is such a thing as righteous anger. In
Ephesians 4, the Apostle Paul recognizes that
truth and writes it this way, in your anger,
do not sin. There will be anger that all of us
will experience from time to time. We're human
beings. God has created us with emotions. And
as we pass through life, we go through circumstances
and situations where anger arises. But in your
anger, do not sin. That is a quote, by the way,
from Psalm 4 verse 4. Go back and take a look
at the context of that sometime. It will give
you some insight to what it means. Anger is attributed
to God and to Jesus Christ, isn't it? It is justified.
God is angry with the wicked every day. It's
a holy anger, a righteous anger. The Lord Jesus
Christ was angry with what he saw in the temple
in the way that the worship of God had been abused
and misused and twisted and perverted. He was
angry about it. But we want to avoid becoming
angry people. It's okay to have angry feelings
and to allow the Spirit of God to use those angry
feelings for some good purpose, to channel that
energy of anger in a right way. But we must avoid
becoming angry people who go to bed in their
anger, who let the sun go down in their wrath.
Get up in the morning with it and the next day
experience it in the next night They go to bed
with it and on and on it goes that makes an angry
person When we do that we become dominated by
anger and we make ourselves unhappy There is
no such thing as a happy angry person Anger dissipates
our energy It destroys our relationships with
others and our own health and it denies the lordship
of Jesus Christ in our lives. Maybe you are an
angry person and that anger comes from years
back in your life because you were victimized.
It was nothing that you did. Perhaps you were
abused or misused or taken advantage of. And
you've grown up with those feelings and there's
anger that lies submerged and deep within you
there is this volcano and it is so powerful that
you hold it tightly lest it escape. Because you
just have the feeling that if it begins to vent
itself it'll be like Mount St. Helens all over
again. What do you do when you have that kind
of anger? First of all you have to choose to
relinquish your anger to Christ Somebody says
you don't know the cause of my anger. You don't
know how I've been wronged That's true, but I
know somebody who does know all of those details
That's the Lord And it is He who has commanded
you to forgive others just as you have been forgiven
by God for Christ's sake. If you couldn't forgive,
God wouldn't have commanded you to forgive. You
can forgive and thus be free of your anger. Dr.
Neil Anderson has written in his very helpful
book called to freedom in Christ, these sentences
about forgiveness. Forgiveness is not forgetting.
Forgetting may be the result of forgiveness,
but it is never the means of forgiveness. When
we bring up the past against others, we haven't
forgiven them. Forgiveness is a choice, a crisis
of the will. Since God requires us to forgive,
it is something we can do. But forgiveness is
difficult for us because it pulls against our
concept of justice. We want revenge for offenses
suffered, but we are told never to take our own
revenge. Why should I let them off the hook,
we protest. You let them off your hook, writes
Anderson. But they are never off God's hook He
will deal with them fairly something that we
cannot do If you don't let offenders off your
hook you are hooked to them and the past and
That just means continued pain for you So stop
the pain Let it go You don't forgive someone
merely for their sake you do it for your sake
so that you can be free Your need to forgive
isn't an issue between you and the offender.
It's between you and God. Forgiveness is agreeing
to live with the consequences of another person's
sin. Forgiveness is costly. We pay the price
of the evil we forgive. Yet you're going to live
with those consequences whether you want to or
not. Your only choice is whether you will do
so in the bitterness, of unforgiveness or the
freedom of forgiveness. Why then do we forgive?
Because Christ forgave us. The unforgiveness
that may be present in your life today can be
a source of tremendous anger. That anger that
you harbor That anger that you hang on to becomes
a block to any spiritual growth in your life.
You cannot mature as a believer. You really can't
mature even as a person until you have dealt
with that anger. You must deal with it. You must.
And the sooner you do it, the better. The sooner
you do it, the better. Let's pray. Our heads
are bowed and our eyes are closed and the Spirit
of God is bringing pressure and the point of
conviction to hearts right here. Aren't you tired
of hanging on? Aren't you tired of trying to
control and keep limits on that anger, that rage
within you? Surely you must be. Will you today
forgive? Will you choose, at the crisis of this
moment, to use your will and say, I will forgive?
Do it for Jesus' sake. Let them off your hook.
They're not off God's hook. Let God deal with
them. Let God deal with them. But let them off
your hook so that you can unhook from them and
get on with your walk with God. Oh, may God help
us this morning to develop patience. A man's
wisdom gives him patience. Father, I pray that
we will today yield to the work of the Holy Spirit
in our lives. May there not be one of us who
would go out desiring anything less than the
fruit of the Spirit, which is patience. And wherein
there are issues that are deep, I pray that you
will cause those hurting and exhausted children
of yours to seek out counsel and help so that
they can be freed from anger. And Father, I pray
that as we experience the emotion of anger through
our daily lives, we will learn to yield that
feeling to the Holy Spirit so that it can be
expressed in a healthy, beneficial way and not
turn around like a torpedo and destroy us. In
Jesus' name I pray, amen. I'm going to ask you
to take your hymnal and turn with me to just
a chorus of 343.