Thank you, John, for that musical recitation
of the chapter on love in 1 Corinthians. It certainly
fits in well with the passage that we're approaching
in the book of Ephesians, the fifth chapter,
where we're told to walk in love. And as the
apostle builds up to that truth, he tells us
what's necessary so that we can walk in love.
As I told you last week, Last Sunday, this past
week, I was in Indiana preaching, and the Lord
marvelously allowed the timing to be such that
I was able to be with a dear friend of mine,
a pastor from Elkhart, Indiana, who had surgery
in Indianapolis. David Graham discovered that
he is the victim of heart disease only a few
weeks ago. His symptoms were shortness of breath,
some chest pain, fatigue. It's not something
that happened quickly, but the symptoms were
noticed quickly. And they discovered that his
problem was that the arteries feeding his heart
were largely clogged with fatty substances. This
is something he apparently inherited from his
father and was not necessarily the result of
his diet. Two of the main arteries were 100 %
and 97 % clogged. And so you can imagine the
kind of stress that his heart was experiencing.
Now, in order to correct that, they had to perform
bypass surgery. How many of you have had bypass
surgery? I know we have several in our church.
I don't see any hands in this particular service.
It is an amazing procedure. We had prayer with
him at 8 o 'clock on Wednesday morning, and then
they took him away to the operating room. It's
always fun to be with somebody when they're just
starting to go under. You know, they get a little
relaxed, and they begin to talk about things.
It's always fun to be there and remind them later
of what they talked about. They took him away
at 8 o 'clock, and then in a three -hour period
of time, they cooled his body down. perhaps about
25 degrees below the normal temperature. They
made the incision in his chest, put him on the
heart -lung machine, stopped his heart, pulled
it out onto his chest, iced it, then did five
bypasses. When they were finished, they put his
heart back in the chest cavity, closed it up,
started the heart. and began to warm his body
again, and all of that in the space of about
three hours. We saw him about 1 .30, and he was
doing quite well at that time, and we thank the
Lord that his heart is beginning to be nourished
again because what was blocking the blood flow
has been either removed or it has been bypassed.
Now it seems to me that in that procedure there
is a certain parallel from which we can learn
some spiritual truth. The apostle in the text
that we've been looking at in Ephesians chapter
4 is telling us that our lives must be unclogged
and freed from sinful actions so that our spiritual
hearts can be nourished, so that our lifestyle
may be pleasing to God. He says, beginning in
verse 29, Let no unwholesome word proceed from
your mouth. In other words, he says, here's something
that will block God's blessing in your life.
So take those rotten words and be done with them.
Remove them. And then he says, in the place of
that, only such a word as is good. In verse 30,
he says, do not go on grieving the Holy Spirit
of God. He says, that will block the blessing
of God. So don't go on grieving the Spirit of
God. Get out whatever it is that is causing him
to feel sorrowful and cut to the heart, and walk
in obedience to him. Be sensitive to the Holy
Spirit. Now we pick it up there today in verse
31, where he says, Let all bitterness and wrath
and anger and clamor and slander be put away
from you, along with all malice, and be kind
to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each
other, just as God in Christ has also forgiven
you. There are several features here of a life
that is well -pleasing to God and the life that
is going to receive the blessing of God. First
of all, there must be a disciplined tongue. Secondly,
there must be a sensitive spirit, that is, a
spirit that is sensitive to the Holy Spirit and
walks in obedience to Him. desiring not to grieve
him. And today as we come to verse 31, we see
that a third feature is a cleansed heart, one
that is delivered from the six vices that are
mentioned. He says, let these things be put away
from you. The picture there is pick them up and
carry them out. It's the picture of a heart that
is swept clean. Now notice the vices, he says,
that must be put away. First, all bitterness.
The word bitter comes from a root verb that means
to cut. And so the idea is, in bitterness, that
of a sharp, stinging, and cutting disposition.
Commentator Eadie says, It is a figurative term
denoting that fretted and irritable state of
mind that keeps a man in perpetual animosity,
that inclines him to harsh and uncharitable opinions
of men and things, that makes him sour, crabby,
and repulsive in his general demeanor, that brings
a scowl over his face and infuses venom into
the words of his tongue. Well, it seems to me
this man captures the essence of what bitterness
is. The apostle says here, put away bitterness.
Be done with it. Sweep it out of your heart.
Hebrews 12, 15 warns us of the root of bitterness
and tells us that by its presence, many can be
defiled. But can we not all testify to that?
For we have all either personally been guilty
of this or we have been in the presence of someone
who has been a sour, grumpy kind of person by
demeanor. And the result of that personality,
indeed the result of that sin in the life, is
that it rubs off on everybody around. It spreads
like a root and brings up weeds of discontent
and unhappiness in the lives of others. When
a parent is this way, when a mate is this way,
or a roommate is known for this kind of bitterness,
then there are many around who are injured by
it. And so he says, be done with that. He says,
secondly, be done with wrath. Put it away. Wrath
is hot, passionate retort. It is that strong
feeling of antagonism producing rage in one's
life. The Latin word here is the word furor.
This is that kind of response to a situation
that is sinful anger. It is rage. It is the unleashing
of feelings deep within like a volcano. It is
a reaction of emotions giving vent to hot words
that flow out of the tongue and scorch the ears
of other people. That's wrath. Be done with that,
he says, and along with that, similarly, be done
with anger. A different word here, the word orge.
It's the word for settled indignation or revenge.
That which seeks retaliation. It is more subtle
than wrath. Because anger can lie buried within
a person. It churns. on the inside, causing resentment
to build up. It smolders there with a get -even
kind of attitude. And then when the winds of
adversity or the breeze of some circumstance
come blowing over that smoldering anger, suddenly
it is brought to life. But the whole time has
been present down inside. The apostle says that
that will not allow the blessing of God in our
lives. If we want to walk worthy of our calling
in Christ Jesus, then here's a blockage that
has to be gotten out of the way, anger. He also
mentions clamor. Clamor comes from both anger
and wrath, except that it's focused in the tongue.
It is a violent outburst. It is shouting at another
person. Acts 23 .9 suggests that that's what
happened when the Apostle Paul divided the Sadducees
and the Pharisees. Do you remember that occasion?
They were attacking him, and he brought up a
subject which they disagreed about. And in order
to divert their attack from himself, he mentioned
the resurrection. Now one group believed that
there was no resurrection. The other group believed
certainly there is a resurrection. And when he
brought up that subject, it says there was immediately
a great clamor. It was a wise move on the part
of the Apostle Paul. But what it did was to release
sin that was in the hearts of his hearers. Because
the people immediately turned on each other with
this loud outburst of argumentation against the
other. The apostle says be done with that. Put
it away. Pick it up and carry it outside your
life and drop it. Be done with it. And along
with clamor, he mentions slander. The word literally
is blasphemy. When we hear that word, we usually
think of blasphemy against God, but the New Testament
speaks of it in terms of blasphemy against other
believers, too. Usually we call it in that sense
slander. It is speaking evil of another person
with abusive speech. Slander is defamation or
detraction with scornful and insolent language.
He says, let none of that be a part of your habitual
speech. Be done with that. You see, it does matter
how we exercise our tongues. And when we exercise
our tongues in this kind of way, God is not pleased.
How then ought we to speak? Well, he's going
to tell us later, but it's with love. We're to
speak with understanding. We're to use grace
in our tongues. But be done with slander. And
then he mentions malice. He says, put all of
these things away along with all malice. Now,
malice is not just mischief. Malice is not...
simply being ornery. But malice is an evil inclination.
A malicious person takes some kind of delight
in doing injury to other people. Jesus was faced
with the Pharisees in Matthew 22, and they sought
to set a trap for him. They were trying to set
him up. to answer a question regarding whether
they should pay tax as Jews. And they thought
they would have him, however he answered. Whether
he said to pay the tax or not to pay the tax,
they thought they had Jesus trapped. And it says
there that Jesus, knowing the malice that was
in their heart, said to them, Render to Caesar
the things that are Caesar's, and to God the
things that are God's. With his marvelous wisdom,
He eluded their trap and laid heavy truth on
them that they did not know how to handle. But
notice what it was that motivated them. It was
malice. It was out of a desire to trap Jesus.
They were seeking wickedly to do him injury.
That's what malice is. The apostle says that
we can have none of that. Our hearts must be
cleansed, beloved, from these six vices. that
he has mentioned. How can they be cleansed? Well,
the first step is to acknowledge honestly the
presence of any of them. Our hearts can't be
cleansed if we are unwilling to admit the presence
of any of these. And so we have to do a heart
search and before God say, Lord, am I guilty
of any of these? And then if indeed the Lord
says yes, We have to deeply and sincerely repent
of them to realize what we're dealing with here,
that this is not some little thing, but these
are vices that will prohibit the blessing of
God. Our hearts, our spiritual hearts, cannot
be nourished if they're blocked with these kinds
of things. They have to be removed. And then
we need to confess them to God as sin and ask
the Holy Spirit to enable us to develop wholesome,
and godly attitudes and employments for our tongue.
And then if we really mean business, another
thing we can do is to find a friend. It might
be a husband or wife, or some friend at least
who is willing to be honest with us and to whom
we will listen. And ask that person to keep check
on us. And if that individual senses this particular
problem coming back in our lives, that we want
that person, to immediately come to us and say,
I perceive this, and we can respond to it. If
we mean business about a cleansed heart, I think
those steps are important. Now the Apostle says
another feature of a life that pleases God, a
life that can receive His blessing, is found
in the first part of verse 32, where it says,
and be kind to one another. Literally, he says,
keep on proving, yourselves to be kind to one
another. The idea is to be graciously useful
to others, to be willing to serve others, get
this, at the point of their need, not at the
point of our convenience. There's a difference.
It is being willing to go the extra mile if necessary
so that we can honestly minister to that other
person or that other family at the point where
they need it at that moment. That's easy to do
for our friends, the people that we know well.
It was not hard for me to drive a few extra hours
this week to go to Indianapolis and be with my
friend. I love him. And I would have driven from
Minnesota to Indiana if necessary to have been
there. Wednesday for his surgery, be with his
family. It's not hard for any of us to be kind
to those that we love. But what about the people
we don't know yet? At least we don't know on
that level. Or what about newcomers to your small
church or to our church family? What about those
who are not what we sometimes call the beautiful
people? I heard someone describe recently a national
Christian leader as being a man who enjoys being
around beautiful people. And I thought to myself,
if that's all there is to that individual, he's
awfully superficial. Jesus came for the unlovely.
Nothing wrong with ministering to those who are
beautiful people. But let's remember that those
who are not the... Beautiful people, as the world
evaluates that, are often even in more need because
of deep hurts in their lives. What about those
who can't return our favor? Are we willing to
meet their needs? Be kind to one another. You
know, as I hear about some of the things that
are done in our church, some of the ministry
that goes on within the small church and the
ministry that goes on to people outside, My heart
is thrilled because I see what Paul says in verse
32 being fleshed out in so many instances, and
I thank God for that. I want you to know that
God is pleased with that, and God will bless
you for that. And then I want to come to the
last part of verse 32 because I think it's critically
important. The final feature that we're going
to look at here of the life that pleases God,
the life that is worthy of the name Christian,
is a forgiving spirit. He says, be tenderhearted,
forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also
has forgiven you. Now there is an assumption
that we have to look at first, and that is that
there will be occasions when we'll need to forgive
other people. God tells us in His Word that within
the body of Christ there are going to be occasions
when we'll need to forgive others. There will
be times when offenses will take place quite
accidentally. But there will be other times when
offenses will take place premeditatively because
someone is walking in the flesh. We haven't all
arrived yet, have we? We all still have some
rough edges in our lives. And when we bump up
against other people with those rough edges,
we can leave hurts, cuts. And that's when forgiveness
is needed. I think he's telling us here in the
first place that forgiveness comes from a tender
heart. It seems that there is a lot of coldness
and callousness in our world today, but let it
never be so among God's people. Let us be tender
-hearted. The idea is in this word that we are
able to feel within. You know, we are presented
with so much ugliness in our world by way of
the television. whether it be in the news or
it be in programs that we may choose to watch,
we're often overcome by all of the violence that
we see to the point that our spirits almost become
immune to it. So that even in real life when
we bump up against it, somehow it just doesn't
move us anymore. The Apostle says that we are
to be tenderhearted, able to feel, caring and
warm, responsive. This word tenderhearted revolves
around powerful feelings of affection, compassion,
and genuine pity. Now he says out of that tenderheartedness,
there needs to flow a stream of forgiveness from
our lives. In the Bible, There are at least seven
words for forgiveness. But the main ones are
to cover, such as the blood of Christ covering
over sin. It's the picture of covering over something.
The second one is to bear or to take away. And
the third one is to pardon. That is to remove.
penalty from someone. Literally here, the apostle
says in this word forgiving, he says, being gracious
to one another. Gary Chapman, who was one of
our speakers this last week in the Bible conference,
and who, by the way, is going to be here for
a family conference in September, it's mentioned
in the newsletter today, and I hope you'll circle
those dates, and plan to be here. all of you,
if you possibly can, to hear this man. Gary Chapman
this last week defined forgiveness with this
phrase, lifting the penalty of an offense. It
means that we no longer hold against another
person the offense that has been committed. It
means to treat the offender as though he had
never sinned against you. Is that not what God's
forgiveness is? When God forgives us, he lifts
the penalty that we have incurred. When he forgives
us, he removes the offense and no longer holds
that against us. It's not an issue any longer
between us and God. And that's what forgiveness
is to be on a human level also. How is forgiveness
to be given? Well, he tells us, forgiving each
other just as God in Christ has also forgiven
you. In other words, we are to pattern our forgiveness
after God's forgiveness. What kind of a pattern
does God give us? Well, a couple of important
things. First of all, when God forgives, He forgives
fully and freely. God does not forgive partially.
God does not forgive temporarily, only to bring
it up again later. When God forgives, He forgives
fully and freely. And that's how we need to forgive.
We haven't forgiven someone. If somewhere down
the line we bring up again that issue that already
we've said we've forgiven, we have failed to
understand what forgiveness is. When forgiven,
a person is relieved of the penalty. No longer
is that event that has been an offense held against
the other person. And secondly, we need to pattern
God in this way. Our forgiveness needs to be
conditioned upon confession. Now that is different
than maybe some that you have heard. Because
there is a teaching that we need to forgive other
people no matter what their attitude is for us.
And there is a certain sense of truth in that,
in this way. We are not to be bitter. toward
other people. You see, forgiveness really isn't
the issue there. It's dealing with our own feelings,
our own bitterness. I believe that there is a
key passage telling us how to forgive in Luke
chapter 17. Would you turn back there with me?
What I'm saying is that we are not to forgive
others. until there has been an admittance made
of wrong. That does not mean that we are vengeful.
It does not mean that we are spiteful, that we
hold bitterness toward them. But we are unable
to lift the penalty. We are unable to restore
relationship until there has been a confession,
an admittance of what's happened. In Luke 17,
Jesus said to his disciples, It is inevitable
that stumbling blocks should come, but woe to
him through whom they come. It would be better
for him if a millstone were hung around his neck
and he were thrown into the sea, and that he
should cause one of these little ones to stumble.
Be on your guard. Notice his instruction. If
your brother sins, rebuke him. And if he repents,
Forgive him. And if he sins against you seven
times a day and returns to you seven times saying,
I repent, forgive him. And the apostles said
to the Lord, increase our faith. Jesus' teaching
here was so unusual to their conception of forgiveness
that their response was, Lord, increase our faith
in light of what you're saying. And notice what
the process that is involved. First of all, an
offense is done. In the term of our text here,
there is a stumbling block, or our brother sins.
That's step number one. Step number two, the
offender is to be rebuked or confronted. Notice
that we're not to go to other people and talk
about what our brother's done to us. That's not
what he's saying. We are to go to our brother
and rebuke him, confront him about what he's
done. What if our brother refuses then to acknowledge
what he has done? Then we leave it at that point.
The only alternative to forgiveness is justice.
And God is the judge. But if our brother acknowledges,
that is, if he repents, then we are obligated
as the fourth step in the process to forgive.
And so there is the offense. There is the confrontation
about the offense. There is repentance on the
part of the one who offended. And then the one
who is offended is to forgive. That is the process.
as our Lord outlines it in Luke chapter 17. We
are to forgive just as God in Christ Jesus has
forgiven us. Does God forgive the sinner until
there's repentance? No, He does not. God has
provided for forgiveness. He has provided for
that forgiveness through the Lord Jesus Christ
and His suffering and death on the cross of Calvary.
But forgiveness is not extended. The penalty
is not lifted until the sinner acknowledges his
sin and repents. 1 John 1 .9 says, If we confess
our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive
us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
And notice that our Lord says that this process
of forgiveness is to be unending. There is no
limit to it. He says if our brother sins against
us seven times, we are to forgive our brother
seven times. Now he wasn't saying count them
off, that's one. That's two. That's not what
he's saying. By using the term seven, our Lord
is actually saying as many times as your brother
sins against you and repents, you are obligated
to forgive him. And that is what caused the disciples
to gasp and to say, Lord, increase our faith.
Now, if we respond by saying, I can't forgive,
then we need to consider something. Not only
do we need to consider what our Lord has commanded
us to do, but we need to remember what our Lord
has done for us. And just as we have been forgiven,
we are to forgive others. Indeed, Jesus warned
us in the disciples' prayer, in what he said
we should pray to the Father, forgive us our
sins as we forgive those who have sinned against
us. How can we gain a forgiving heart? How can
we get over this hurdle of hurt so that we can
honestly forgive the other person? The answer
is only by going to the cross and there seeing
how much our Lord has forgiven us and at what
a cost. Then we shall see that the utmost we
are called upon to forgive compared with what
we ourselves have been forgiven is but a very
little thing. The result of forgiveness is that
relationship is restored. Fellowship is restored
as a result of the forgiving process. You say,
well, I can forgive, but I can't forget. And
you know there's a certain truth there, because
we are unable to go into our minds and erase
memories. We cannot choose to forget things.
In the sense that no longer will they ever come
to our minds. But I tell you what we can do.
When we forgive, we can choose to treat that
other person as though that event that we can
remember never occurred. You say, well, I have
forgiven someone of something they did to me.
But I still get feelings of... anger about it,
I still have feelings of bitterness, then my
friend, the problem is not in what happened before,
it's what's happening right now in your heart.
Because you see, those feelings are within you.
And your need is to go to your Heavenly Father
and to pour out your heart to Him and say, Lord,
I have forgiven my friend. I still have these
feelings within. Would you please deal with them?
Enable me to put these evil feelings away. And
God will answer that prayer, my friend. He's
not going to erase the event from your memory.
But he can and he will take away the power of
that memory so it no longer dominates your feelings
about the other person. The Apostle says if we
want a life that pleases God, if we want to walk
worthy of our calling, then we have to have tender
hearts that are eager to forgive the brother
who sins against us and who repents. We ought
to forgive as fully and as freely as God has
forgiven us for Christ's sake. The title of this
message and the previous one is Cleaning Up Your
Act. All of us have some cleaning up to do. As
we examine this text of Scripture in Ephesians
chapter 4, we see the Apostle saying, remove
this, put away that, be done with this, no longer
do that. And in the place of those things, do
this and do this. That's what he means by cleaning
up. We ought to clean up, and for good reason.
In the first place, it pleases God that we should
do that. But there's another reason. When we
clean up our act, it liberates us. It liberates
us from the shame and the guilt that we carry
around with us. When we clean up our act, it
enables God to pour out His blessing upon us
and then through us to other people. It is a
liberating thing to be done with the things that
we've talked about. these sins of the flesh,
and to walk before God seeking to obey Him. I
don't know what your need may be this morning.
But I do know this. I know that God is waiting
right there at the point of your need. And that
God is waiting for you to reach out your hand
to Him and say, Lord, here's my need. And He
will reach out to you, my friend, and He will.
meet you at that point of need. It may be that
you need forgiveness. It may be that there is
sin in your life that is blocking God's blessing.
That's the point of need. It may be that you
need to be able to forgive others and you need
God's help to do it. God will give you that.
It may be that you need a new vocabulary. God
will help you to develop that. Whatever the point
of need is this morning, he's there. Meet him
there. Let's pray. With our heads bowed, our
eyes closed, I wonder what the Spirit of God
is lovingly saying to you within. What is that
point of need that he is concerned about? Will
you right now talk to the Lord? Will you extend
the hand of faith to him and receive his grace,
his forgiveness, his enablement, whatever your
need is? Right now in the quietness of this moment,
will you talk with him? Father in heaven, we
thank you that you are able to meet every need
that we have. And we thank you for exposing our
needs at those times when we are able to deal
with them honestly with you. There have been
scores of us here this morning who have done
business with you. Thank you for answering that
prayer. In advance, we express our gratitude
for the way that you're going to answer. And
I pray, Father, that the result of our response
to your working in our lives will be that our
walk will be worthy of our calling. And being
called Christians, our lifestyle will reflect
the person of Jesus Christ to those around. And
this we pray in his blessed name. Amen.