Let us pray for the blessing of the preaching
of His Word. Our God and our Father, thank you
for sending the Spirit to give us life and to
empower us for the call you have given us to
carry out your words of life to the ends of the
earth. Please allow the words of my mouth and
the meditations of all our hearts to be acceptable
in your sight. O Lord, our rock and nearest kinsman
and Redeemer, Jesus Christ, our risen Lord. Amen.
So we'll be reading two Psalms. I know you're
very familiar with the second one, for we sing
it every time there is a baptism. Psalm 127,
it was written by Solomon, very likely, so was
Psalm 128. These are understood as the household
Psalms. Psalm 127, a song of a sense of Solomon.
Unless Yahweh builds the house, they labor in
vain who build it. Unless Yahweh guards the city,
the watchman stays awake in vain. It is vain
for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to
eat the bread of sorrows, for so he gives his
beloved sleep. Behold, children are a heritage
from the Lord. The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are
the children of one's youth. Happy is the man
whose quiver is full of them. They shall not
be ashamed, but shall speak with their enemies
in the gate. Psalm 128, a song of assents. Blessed
is everyone who fears Yahweh, who walks in His
ways. When you eat the labor of your hands, you
shall be happy, and it shall be well with you.
Your wife shall be like a fruitful vine in the
very heart of your house. Your children like
olive plants all around your table. Behold thus
shall the man be blessed who fears Yahweh. Yahweh
bless you out of Zion and may you see the good
of Jerusalem all the days of your life. Yes,
may you see your children's children. Peace be
upon Israel. These are the words of Almighty
God. Receive them in your hearts. There are three
things I want you to think about and use as your
lens here this morning. These three things are,
we are builders of the house of God. We are builders
of the house of God. This next one is probably
going to be a little shocking. Marriage is easy
or you are doing it wrong. Marriage is easy or
you are doing it wrong. And finally, follow God's
blueprint for marriage. Follow God's blueprint
for marriage. Now, this is part of our continuing
series of foundations for the summer. If you've
missed the ones prior to, perhaps today, if you
go back on another time and listen to them just
to continue on in this process. But every sermon
this summer is building on the previous ones.
The whole of the mission that was given to mankind
is to build the house of God first in worship
and then to the very ends of the earth Dearly
beloved you are saints because of the work of
Jesus Christ on your behalf We are no longer
in bondage to sin and so as it says in Romans
chapter 6 beginning of verse 12 Therefore do
not let sin reign in your mortal body That you
should obey its lusts and do not present your
members as instruments of unrighteousness To
sin but present yourselves to God as being alive
from the dead your members as instruments of
righteousness to God For sin shall not have dominion
over you for you are not under the law but under
the grace. Now we know this, you've read this,
you've heard this, you know you're no longer
in bondage to sin. And Paul tells the Roman church,
hey, you're no longer under bondage of sin, so
act like it. The difficulty for us is not just
mortifying our sin, but obeying God. You know,
a lot of times our focus becomes on, I can't
do this, I can't do that, I'm gonna beat that
all down. and we neglect what God has been telling
us to do. Now it is true that we must stop doing
sinful things, but this is best found in doing
the things that please and glorify God. We are
to take the new life granted to us in Jesus by
the power of the Spirit and become disciples.
We are to learn intellectually. how to be disciples,
but then put into practice being disciples by
living a Christian life with other Christians
and most certainly our wives, husbands, and children.
There's a general mission to build the house
of God by the specific mission in building Christian
God -fearing households. lives centered on worship
and rooted in the mission of our household to
the glory of God and the benefit of others. Now
this leads to the questions of what plans do
we use to build with? What materials do we use?
And what skills and tools do we already have?
This reminds me of a time when my children I'd
attempted to take a basic multi -level treehouse.
I know it doesn't sound basic, but we had built
a treehouse for them, my father -in -law and
I. And we had made just this lower platform below
the main one, mostly as like a ladder, a way
up, right? And my children decided that they
wanted to make it better. And so they went and
got some tools and some scrap wood from my workshop
and began to build. I came home from work and
saw the work that they had done and was very
pleased. I was very pleased in their motivations
and their efforts. But upon inspection, I found
that although they had a good foundation, the
additions were not safe or sturdy. Things didn't
quite fit right. The nails were bent. are not
really nailed in at all. You see, even though
they had improved that tree house, danger lurked
everywhere. Perhaps for the older children who
were the builders, they might have known of certain
dangers. You know how that is? Well, I don't
think I quite got that, but you know. They're
warning their little brothers and sisters. You
know how that is if you have children of multiple
ages. But somehow the little ones don't remember.
And so they, as younger children, would simply
be susceptible to constant dangers. As their
father, I inspected the situation, brought out
the proper tools, the correct fasteners, and
materials to make the tree house both safe and
beautiful. The children did not have the right
plan, although their motives were right. They
didn't have the right materials or the tools
or the experience. Many people today are struggling
in their marriage or don't even want to be married
at all or have children because they don't know
who they are, what they are for, and how to do
what they are made for, what they are made for.
And even if they know what they're made for,
like my children, they don't know how to do it.
They don't know what materials to use. Like children
being brought in to build houses, to build a
city, in the end, the city may have shelters,
but they are not ready to withstand the winds,
earthquakes, fires, rains. or even the changing
of the seasons, let alone be the glorious city,
the city of God, the place where His temple resides.
We need to understand God's plans, materials,
and tools for marriage before we can develop
the skills to be a master builder. You know what?
If you grow up in the home of a master builder,
guess what happens? You learn some of those skills
by just being around. Well, and usually because
dad says, here, do this, pick up that, watch
me while I do that. One day when you get older,
your hope is saying, I want you to take that
circular saw and cut that. Did you measure it
twice? Did you mark it off? In very much the
same way, that apprenticing is what happens in
our households. Now, all of us grew up under
different kinds of circumstances, right? Some
of us. with Christian families that set a pretty
good example, yet not perfect. Others of us had
a, it was kind of bumpy. Christianity might have
been around, but it was kind of bumpy. And then
there's others who may have grown up in absolutely
a family devoid of Christian truth. People having
varying degrees of both good and bad examples.
And here's what happened. As you got older, Then
enters other examples and ideas to challenge
what you have seen and experienced. Some for
good and many for evil. You've noticed that many
of our modern buildings, I'm trying to get us
somewhere here, but many of our modern buildings,
and this is particularly noticeable when you
go to DC. If you look at all of the buildings
built from the 30s, Before, from the 1930s and
before, they are all spectacular in their architecture.
There's a lot of, one could say, gratuitous beauty
in architecture. Built well, with wonderful materials.
And yet, you find everything built from 1960
forward. It is all about utility. It's all about
no beauty. and just using it. In the very same
way, these things come true in households. We
have abandoned the art of the beautiful and the
useful design. And instead of using durable materials,
we turn to the practical and inexpensive. and
simply the utility of something. This is ungodly.
This is an ungodly and androgynous way of thinking
and living. Now, sometimes practically speaking,
sometimes you build what you can afford to build
at the moment, right? But instead of working
towards the end of the wonderful, beautiful things
that God has created, we just want to make everything
about, what is the practical use? Can it be used
for this? It is androgynous in its thinking.
And so too, in the families, we have the same
thing. It's an androgynous way. We talked about
this last week, right? Where male and female
are considered to be interchangeable in everything.
And so in our marriages and families, men become
feminine in words and behaviors, and women become
masculine in words and actions without regard
to what God has designed and made them for. So
durability and beauty doesn't exist in those
circumstances. So marriages have become hard
trials without joy, peace, or love. God has so
graciously given us the revealed word in the
Bible to teach and model what we were made for
and what we are to do. Dearly beloved, we need
to stop using the blueprints materials and methods
of the pagan, God -hating world, and embrace
His loving, gracious, and victorious blueprints,
materials, and methods. In our passage today,
God reminds us that unless Yahweh builds the
house, and remember, why do I say Yahweh when
it says, Lord, that is the proper word? And it
reminds us of the covenant God who keeps His
promises. His faithfulness to us He says this
unless Yahweh builds a house they labor in vain
who build it unless Yahweh guards the city The
watchman stays awake in vain. It is vain for
you to rise up early To sit up late to eat the
bread of sorrows For so he gives his beloved
sleep All efforts to build a house not centered
on God and His design plans are doomed to fail.
Notice that the labor and guarding done by God
is the same charge that God gave the first Adam
in the garden. Man made in His image is to guard
and labor in the way that God has commanded.
Otherwise, we are working against His design
and all our efforts. are in vain. But if we trust
God and do good according to the scriptures,
even when we sleep, God is making us prosper.
That's what that line's about, that God gives
sleep, right? He's making us prosper, even when
we rest. God then tells us that children are
a heritage from the Lord. Children are a wonderful
reward, especially children from our youth. Now,
I do understand this. By God's providence, sometimes
there is barrenness. Sometimes by circumstances
outside of our control. And that is a particular
hardship. And it's one we should take up with
the Lord and is one that we should trust Him
in. But men and women are designed to build households
with children. And children from our youth are
especially a blessing. Now for many of you, you
have young children. A handful of you have adult
children. But I can tell you, by the mercies
of God, what a wonderful thing it is to consider
your children, that quiver full, wonderful arrows
shot out to extend the kingdom of heaven everywhere
that they are. You see, what is God's blueprint.
As we studied last week, we are made male and
female. We came to understand that it is God's
design for us to be male and female. And together
in marriage, we have been given a mission, but
our callings as men and women are different,
but are essential to each other. The Bible takes
the position that there is a God -given normative
masculine behavior. Trust God and do good Right
good men fear God not other men and not their
wives Psalm 128 begins with blessed is everyone
now that everyone there is better translated
as man or husband because it's a masculine noun
and so blessed is the man who fears the Lord
meaning that man who walks in God's ways, and
he is submitting to God in his word, not just
internal thoughts or piety, but in every area
of their lives. Hear what it says in 1 Kings
chapter 2, beginning in verse 1, it says this,
now the days of David drew near that he should
die, and he charged Solomon his son, saying,
I go the way of all the earth. Be strong, therefore,
and prove yourself a man." And he's going to
explain a little bit about what that is here
in a minute to Solomon, but it's really important
to understand that there's a way that a man should
act. The Bible makes that assumption because
God designed it this way and has given us categories
for this. He says this, and keep the charge of
Yahweh your God to walk in His ways, to keep
His statutes, His commandments, His judgments.
and his testimonies, as it is written in the
law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that
you do and wherever you turn." And so Solomon,
he's a house builder. Now this is a really important
distinction. We know that King David, as important
as he is to the story of God, carries a sword.
And Solomon is told to be a house builder. Remember,
David couldn't be the builder of the temple.
by God's design. He said, be a builder of God's
house. Now it's important. I think we live in
a time. I just want to make this distinction.
We'll talk about this in some coming weeks. We're
at a stage where we need to be like Nehemiah.
We're building the temple. We're building up
the walls. We're building up the church by our
household. So we need to have a sword in one
hand and a trowel in another. It's not just about
war. It is about building. The household of God
both in our church and in our homes Now masculinity
can certainly be abused But evil men are not
to become the reason to change God's design and
blueprint As one commentator puts it marriage
should be easy Husbands and wives are designed
for each other If we have the wrong or divided
mission or the wrong person is assigned for the
task, we have strife and difficulty and therefore
no unity. We were designed to come together and
I hope all you young people out there listen
too. Boys and girls listen, this is important.
You're supposed to be looking one day to find
a godly husband or godly wife. This is relevant.
to every person in here. And you might say, I'm
old and I don't have a spouse anymore. Well,
now you are to pray. You are to teach these things
that God's Word teaches. You have a mission too.
But in the mission that we have, we need to understand
that if we are not following God's blueprint,
if we are not receiving the teaching of God's
Word, what happens is, The people with the right
giftings are doing the wrong things. And we end
up divided on so many different things. Let me
ask you this question. Is your marriage easy
or hard? To be honest, I think for most of us,
we need to say it's hard sometimes. It's hard.
And you know what you have? What do you hear?
You get people together and they'll say, oh yeah,
you're getting married great. You know, this
is really hard. It's really hard. You know why
it's hard? One, we don't rejoice in the distinctives
that God has given us as men and women. And two,
we don't follow his blueprint. So even though
he's given us his word and he's given us the
foundation of the work of Jesus. and he has given
us the example of Jesus to his bride, we push
back against it. We push back. And so what happens
is the strife is in our house instead of us pulling
together against the difficulties that are sure
to come. Consider the reformer Martin Luther,
he put it this way, there is no greater comfort
outside of the gospel of Jesus Christ than marriage.
He considered marriage the sweetest of blessings
appointed by God. Do you feel like your marriage
is a sweet appointment from God? And Luther's,
and this is what we have to understand, you know,
oh, this great Luther, right? Out of all this
faith. You know what? By God's providence, Luther
had a lot of hardships. He had a lot of difficulties.
People were literally seeking to kill him. And
at every turn, things were difficult. And yes,
God blessed him with a wife. And it was a wonderful,
wonderful blessing. You see, Martin understood
that marriage was designed to bring peace and
joy to tackle the hardships and trials. our call
and we're to do it together to transform the
world to the glory of God, you know, you guys
probably Watch anybody watch any soccer in the
last month or so Right, right. Tell me about
the Norwegians. What did they do? They talked
about they would get out there and they were
I think there's 11 players on the field So they're
like the 12th man and what were they doing? They
were getting together. They put their arms out
there anybody know what they did rule Right?
Row. Right? You see, what happens is, if you
got one person with an oar and they're going,
and this person's going this way, right? You're
not unified. And the strife is in the boat. Now
row together. The trials of life are to be expected.
And it is a blessing as you address them together.
People of God, we are better in marriage than
alone. If our marriage becomes a trial, then
marriage becomes the roadblock to the mission
to build the house of God and every other trial
and challenge in life. So we must follow the
scriptures, the blueprint for the household,
and therefore God's house. This includes husbands,
wives, and children, and even the promise of
the joys of grandchildren one day. Now scripture
teaches us that the husband has responsibility,
and authority. Again, looking at Psalm 128, picking
up at verse 2, notice how many times you or your
shows up. So what is the subject? The man, right?
The blessed man. And it says this, it's speaking
of husbands, when you eat the labor of your hands,
so his labor, you shall be happy, and it shall
be well with you. your wife shall be like a fruitful
vine in the very heart of your house your children
like olive plants all around your table behold
thus shall the man be blessed and who is that
who fears Yahweh now here's the first order of
things ladies if you have fear about your husband's
authority Gentlemen, here it is. You are subject
to Christ Jesus. You are subject to His representatives
on the earth, and that is the elders. You are
subject to God's Word. That is your response.
That is your call. Now, you need to understand
that the order of things is God the Father, God
the Son. the husband, the wife. And obviously,
as I mentioned before, God's representatives
on earth for the Son are the elders. For many
today who are coming to their senses, recognize
that men should take responsibility for their
households. Of course, this was always known,
but there's this huge push over the last 75 years
to throw that out. But for these people that
are recognizing it, they desire for someone to
be responsible. But they reject the other half
of God's design and it is the authority granted
in that responsibility God is saying that husbands
your household is your responsibility because
It is also under your authority Plain and simple
you must fear God. So as Joshua declared in Joshua
chapter 24 pay attention now to this pattern
beginning in verse 14, now therefore fear Yahweh
serve him in sincerity and truth put away the
gods which your father served on the other side
of the river and in Egypt serve Yahweh and if
it seems evil to you to serve Yahweh choose for
yourselves this day whom you will serve whether
the gods which your father served that were on
the other side of the river or the gods of the
Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for
me and my house, we will serve Yahweh." So first
of all, he declares this. For me and my house,
we're serving God. So that means that you make
decisions that are about serving God, about your
wife, your children, your money, your activities,
and most importantly, where you are on Sunday
mornings. That's your decision. Make it so. Husbands,
fear God and put away all the gods, idols, and
blueprints that your father served on the other
side of the river. They're there. Take both responsibility
and authority in your household, fearing God
both in the final judgment and now here on earth.
Men, are you listening? You will lift up your
household as a tribute offering to God. I want
to pause right there. I know for me that's a
fearful thing outside the work of Jesus Christ
and the power of the Spirit. Will God receive
this offering seeing that you have transformed
it so that God's will in heaven is done here
on earth in your household? Fear God above every
person. including your wife and children. You
have authority and you are responsible whether
you act like it or not. The entirety of Numbers
chapter 30 shows this in great detail. We're
not going to read all that, don't worry. I put
it in your notes I sent out last night, so go
and read it yourself. But you are responsible
for your wives or daughters vows and commitments
on the day in which you hear it. If you do nothing
on the day that you hear of it, you condone and
affirm their vow. So you have it whether you
speak to it or not. Once you know it, you are
responsible for it. Too many men fear their wives
and abdicate and defer to their wives in all
things. Ladies and gentlemen, one of the great
enemies of our day is niceness. Niceness is flattery
meant to sue the woman by lies and deceit. And
frankly, everybody, to sue them by lies and deceit.
I did a little study through the scriptures.
I had to go to several translations in order
to do it, but the word nice only shows up four
times. And every time, it's terrible flattery
to deceive people. Not acting as a man, that
is, acting passive, abdicating, always destroys
marriages. As one commentator puts it, niceness
by a man breeds in our wives disrespect, nagging,
and a controlling and conspiring heart. This
spirals into increasing unlovability by the wife,
a bad man. and an ungodly man provides for and
nourishes an ungodly and bad wife who in turn
takes her gifts of multiplying to wickedness
and corrupted femininity. A dominant wife and
a passive husband means there is no single unified
mission and this leads to a bad marriage, a hard
marriage. Turning to Ephesians 5, which we'll
study in more detail in the weeks to come, teaches
God's design and actions of which we are to do
what? Abandon the gods of our pagan and weak
fathers and the idols of our age and embrace
God's blueprint. It says this, wives submit to
your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband
is the head of the wife. As also, Christ is the
head of the church and he is the savior of the
body. Therefore, just as the church is subject
to Christ, so let wives be to their own husbands
and everything. Husbands, love your wives. Just
as Christ also loved the church and gave himself
for her, that he might sanctify and cleanse her
with the washing of the water of the word, that
he might present her to himself a glorious church,
not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing,
but that she should be holy and without blemish.
Drop it down to verse 33. Nevertheless, let each
one of you in particular so love his own wife
as himself and let the wife see that she respects
her husband. God's blueprint in the very way
is carried out in the very way that you have
been designed by God. Wives, submit to your husbands.
This is being subject to, meaning you must respect
and honor your husbands. disrespect, contempt,
gossip, or undermining your husband in front
of others, especially your children, is tearing
down your marriage. Proverbs 14 .1 tells us,
the wise woman builds her house, but the foolish
pulls it down with her hands. Husbands, you must
love and cherish. Love means to provide and guard.
and take responsibility and authority. Feed love
to your wife. Wives, feed respect to your husbands.
A wife is given to nurture and glorify in your
household. She's at the heart and center, this
Psalm tells us. Respect and obey. If your children,
do you ever wonder why your children don't respect
and obey you? Is it because you do not respect
and obey God? and your husband. Wives, you cannot
outsource love and fruitfulness. You cannot expect
others to do what you are called to do in your
household. And there will be more to come in
the coming weeks. God has created each one of
you as a man and as a woman. So men follow Christ
like a man. Women follow Christ as a woman. Men,
you are to provide and guard. Women, you are
to nurture and glorify. As we build the house
of God, let us remember that it all flows out
of worship. Look at the last two verses of Psalm
128. Yahweh bless you out of Zion. What is Zion?
That is the place where the temple resides. So
now the psalmist is telling that blessed man
with his wife and his children, the one that
fears God. and follows his word. God is going
to bless you out of what? The temple, out of
worship together. And you may see the good of
Jerusalem. That is the city of God. And when
will this happen? All the days of your life.
Yes, may you see your children's children. Peace
be upon Israel. So that peace is for the covenant
people of God. in our households. So we have
what? The temple. We have the city. So we have
Zion. We have the city of Jerusalem. And we have
the land of Israel. This progression starts in
worship, right? Goes to the glorious nature of
the Christian fellowship together. And then finally
goes out to the land in our households. And peace
will be with us. Fearing God is trusting God's
blueprint. It begins with worship with God's
people on the Lord's Day, even on vacation. Or,
guess what? If it doesn't start with fear of
the Lord and worship, all our efforts are to
no avail. Your foundation is Jesus. Trust God
and do good according to His Word. You are called
to take dominion by standing at your assigned
post and being fruitful. Fear God and follow
his blueprint have no fear of being able to do
this Because right now how many guys are feeling
like you're on top of the world coming through
this sermon All right, I got both hands down
too But I'm not relying on myself I am relying
on Jesus Christ and his wonderful promise of
sending the spirit to enable us to do what? To
be obedient to be joyful to carry out His design
and call for us God keeps his word to his church
for the sake of Jesus. Here's 2nd Corinthians
chapter 1 For all the promises of God in him
and that is Jesus our yes and in him Amen to
the glory of God through us Now he who establishes
us with you in Christ and has anointed us is
God who also has sealed us and given us the Spirit
in our hearts as a guarantee. Praise God for
His faithfulness to His covenant promises to
us. Let us pray. Heavenly Father, we thank You
for Your wonderful design and purposes in creation,
even as men and women. We thank You for Your
love for us. Christ Jesus to deliver us from
our sins in a new life to transform the world
to your glory Help us we pray to joyfully obey
your holy word in our marriages Submitting to
our calls as husbands and wives with all abandoned
To the gods and idols of this world We ask all
this for the sake of Jesus Christ our Lord who
reigns with you and the Holy Spirit world without
end amen Let us continue our worship by the giving
of our tithes and offerings. Heavenly Father,
we bring forth our tithes and offerings to you
as a tribute offering for all of the things that
we have done in our households this week, whether
it be work or whether it be in our families.
All of the things we do, this is representative
of it. Please use these gifts for your glory
and for service in your kingdom. Blessed be God
forever and ever. Amen.