WEBVTT 00:00:01.320 --> 00:00:04.660 Now, welcome to another inspiring edition of 00:00:04.660 --> 00:00:10.199 Sound Insight with Dr. Tom Curran. Welcome to 00:00:10.199 --> 00:00:14.539 the Coaching Hour with Dr. Tom Curran. On Thursdays, 00:00:14.539 --> 00:00:16.519 I dedicate this time to share with you insights 00:00:16.519 --> 00:00:20.679 drawn from my work coaching executives and leaders, 00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:23.820 both in Catholic settings, having worked with 00:00:23.820 --> 00:00:27.160 Catholic church leaders for 35 years, as well 00:00:27.160 --> 00:00:29.460 as in corporate America, where I've coached CEOs 00:00:29.460 --> 00:00:33.579 and C -suite executives for over 25 years. And 00:00:33.579 --> 00:00:36.119 I'm being a steward. I want to hand on to you 00:00:36.119 --> 00:00:38.909 insights. It's so fascinating that The insights 00:00:38.909 --> 00:00:41.909 that are drawn from our Catholic faith and this 00:00:41.909 --> 00:00:45.909 incredible Western tradition of philosophy and 00:00:45.909 --> 00:00:50.850 theology can have a fruitful impact on how you 00:00:50.850 --> 00:00:54.810 lead, on how you operate. So I'm going to share 00:00:54.810 --> 00:00:58.270 with you some interesting questions to get conversations 00:00:58.270 --> 00:01:00.429 started that are kind of coaching questions, 00:01:00.530 --> 00:01:04.489 but I'm going to focus in on a leadership theme 00:01:04.489 --> 00:01:09.969 that is going to be principally hidden in your 00:01:09.969 --> 00:01:14.530 life, but will have an incredible visible impact 00:01:14.530 --> 00:01:19.609 when you show up in a room. A hidden reality 00:01:19.609 --> 00:01:23.810 that has a visible impact. I don't even have 00:01:23.810 --> 00:01:27.329 to hide it from you. I'm talking about intercessory 00:01:27.329 --> 00:01:33.150 prayer and how leaders have a very specific call 00:01:33.150 --> 00:01:37.790 and role to play in interceding. for others. 00:01:38.090 --> 00:01:39.870 So I'm going to share some stories and themes 00:01:39.870 --> 00:01:43.189 around that today. But I want to kick things 00:01:43.189 --> 00:01:46.489 off with some, again, interesting questions. 00:01:46.590 --> 00:01:49.810 And these came from the guy who is considered 00:01:49.810 --> 00:01:52.709 in some ways the father of the modern or the 00:01:52.709 --> 00:01:57.569 contemporary profession of coaching. His name 00:01:57.569 --> 00:02:01.329 is Thomas Leonard. And I'll introduce those questions 00:02:01.329 --> 00:02:10.819 to you in a moment. Prayer is a dialogue with 00:02:10.819 --> 00:02:13.939 the Lord. It's not just us communicating with 00:02:13.939 --> 00:02:18.099 God, but it's us talking to God, I should say. 00:02:18.360 --> 00:02:20.539 It's us communicating with God. That means there's 00:02:20.539 --> 00:02:23.800 a back and a forth. And if we have the insight 00:02:23.800 --> 00:02:26.340 drawn from our tradition, it's that communication 00:02:26.340 --> 00:02:29.259 starts on God's side. So even though I'm going 00:02:29.259 --> 00:02:32.000 to start with a prayer right now, there's something 00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:34.580 that precedes my prayer, and that is the grace. 00:02:35.289 --> 00:02:38.889 and the inspiration, and this situation that 00:02:38.889 --> 00:02:41.689 I'm in that gives rise to an opportunity to pray. 00:02:42.610 --> 00:02:45.009 And so let's pray. In the name of the Father, 00:02:45.030 --> 00:02:46.930 and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen. Loving 00:02:46.930 --> 00:02:49.449 God, I thank you and I praise you for who you 00:02:49.449 --> 00:02:50.909 are and for all that you've done for us. And 00:02:50.909 --> 00:02:53.469 Lord, I ask that you would... Give us the grace 00:02:53.469 --> 00:02:56.229 we need today, Lord, to stay in that rich dialogue 00:02:56.229 --> 00:02:58.669 with you. Lord, we want to come to insight that 00:02:58.669 --> 00:03:01.610 you have for us. Help us, Lord, to come to know 00:03:01.610 --> 00:03:06.030 a new level of seeing into our own lives, seeing 00:03:06.030 --> 00:03:09.409 into your will for our lives, especially as we 00:03:09.409 --> 00:03:12.909 walk with you, Lord, as you accompany us in this 00:03:12.909 --> 00:03:16.370 season. Thank you, Lord, for the gifts and graces 00:03:16.370 --> 00:03:18.129 you've poured out upon our lives. Make us good 00:03:18.129 --> 00:03:21.439 stewards of them. And we make this prayer, Jesus, 00:03:21.560 --> 00:03:24.580 in your holy name. Amen. In the name of the Father 00:03:24.580 --> 00:03:27.319 and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen. What is 00:03:27.319 --> 00:03:29.759 something that you're doing that you'd like to 00:03:29.759 --> 00:03:33.599 do better? What is something that you're not 00:03:33.599 --> 00:03:37.960 doing that you'd like to start doing? And what's 00:03:37.960 --> 00:03:40.639 something that you're doing that you'd like to 00:03:40.639 --> 00:03:44.639 no longer do? And what's something that you don't 00:03:44.639 --> 00:03:48.860 have that you'd like to attain? Those are four 00:03:48.860 --> 00:03:53.000 questions that Thomas Leonard is the source of 00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:54.960 them for me. And I learned of this back in, I 00:03:54.960 --> 00:03:57.680 think it was 1998. It was that long ago when 00:03:57.680 --> 00:04:01.000 I discovered of this realm of coaching. And he 00:04:01.000 --> 00:04:03.659 was one of the, again, thought leaders at the 00:04:03.659 --> 00:04:06.400 time and helped spread this as an alternative 00:04:06.400 --> 00:04:10.780 to training or therapy or consulting or being 00:04:10.780 --> 00:04:13.969 a mentor. Being a coach has an opportunity to 00:04:13.969 --> 00:04:17.089 walk with someone and help them to advance, help 00:04:17.089 --> 00:04:20.790 them to improve. Oftentimes, there are two elements 00:04:20.790 --> 00:04:23.430 to coaching. There's an element of overcoming 00:04:23.430 --> 00:04:25.810 certain brokennesses and weaknesses, and there's 00:04:25.810 --> 00:04:28.230 an element of, I'm going to continue to advance 00:04:28.230 --> 00:04:31.129 and mature the giftings that I have. It's a lot 00:04:31.129 --> 00:04:33.730 like, believe it or not, it's like Lent, walking 00:04:33.730 --> 00:04:35.569 through the desert. When you walk through the 00:04:35.569 --> 00:04:39.420 desert with the Lord and you are... praying and 00:04:39.420 --> 00:04:42.339 fasting and giving alms, right? You're taking 00:04:42.339 --> 00:04:44.600 on these disciplines of Lent. You're attempting 00:04:44.600 --> 00:04:46.660 to walk with the Lord and make this journey, 00:04:46.759 --> 00:04:49.720 right? And this 40 -day journey through the desert 00:04:49.720 --> 00:04:55.019 is both drawn from the scriptural Exodus. And 00:04:55.019 --> 00:04:57.420 in that Exodus journey, what do you see? You 00:04:57.420 --> 00:05:00.079 see this journey from, you're trying to leave 00:05:00.079 --> 00:05:02.420 behind the brokennesses and the slavery aspects 00:05:02.420 --> 00:05:05.870 of being in Egypt. And you're trying to grow 00:05:05.870 --> 00:05:09.310 in the, let's call it, exercise those muscles 00:05:09.310 --> 00:05:12.670 of being children of God and following his lead 00:05:12.670 --> 00:05:15.910 wherever he would take us. And so moving into 00:05:15.910 --> 00:05:17.769 that promised land of good things that the Lord 00:05:17.769 --> 00:05:20.930 has for us. And so is fasting principally about 00:05:20.930 --> 00:05:25.629 breaking the chains of bondage to the brokennesses 00:05:25.629 --> 00:05:28.490 in our lives? Or is it about spiritually working 00:05:28.490 --> 00:05:31.589 us out so that we become more hungry for God's 00:05:31.589 --> 00:05:34.439 word? Yes. The answer is yes. It's both. It's 00:05:34.439 --> 00:05:37.100 both of those elements. And you could do the 00:05:37.100 --> 00:05:38.860 same thing with prayer and with almsgiving. And 00:05:38.860 --> 00:05:42.160 so coaching is similar to that. And when I sit 00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:44.560 down and I work with someone across the table 00:05:44.560 --> 00:05:48.199 or I'm working with a group or a couple, it's, 00:05:48.199 --> 00:05:52.500 okay, let's identify the gift that you are and 00:05:52.500 --> 00:05:54.420 the gifts that you have. This is a really interesting 00:05:54.420 --> 00:05:57.519 thing because when I start an engagement with 00:05:57.519 --> 00:05:59.540 someone or with a company, the first thing I 00:05:59.540 --> 00:06:01.899 do when I parachute in is I'll do an assessment. 00:06:02.399 --> 00:06:06.480 Try to gain insight into what's going on at a 00:06:06.480 --> 00:06:08.360 human level, right? What's happening in terms 00:06:08.360 --> 00:06:10.399 of dynamics on the leadership team or in this 00:06:10.399 --> 00:06:13.639 particular individual for whom I'm going to be 00:06:13.639 --> 00:06:15.899 working as a coach or what's happening in the 00:06:15.899 --> 00:06:19.779 organization. And it's so important to begin 00:06:19.779 --> 00:06:23.720 with some... insight that can come from gathering 00:06:23.720 --> 00:06:27.379 of information, gathering from those that are 00:06:27.379 --> 00:06:30.319 around this person. And the first question in 00:06:30.319 --> 00:06:33.439 that assessment is, what are this person's best 00:06:33.439 --> 00:06:36.639 gifts? What are this person's best gifts? And 00:06:36.639 --> 00:06:41.459 it's so funny. And I just, hey, take a note of 00:06:41.459 --> 00:06:44.079 this. When I sit down across the table and I'm 00:06:44.079 --> 00:06:46.699 saying, hey, I'm here to talk with you about 00:06:46.699 --> 00:06:53.240 Executive X or this leader in the company. And 00:06:53.240 --> 00:06:55.480 are you ready? Okay, here we go. It's five short 00:06:55.480 --> 00:06:58.560 questions. Here's the first question. What are 00:06:58.560 --> 00:07:02.639 their best gifts? And they get stopped in their 00:07:02.639 --> 00:07:07.819 tracks so often because they think that I'm going 00:07:07.819 --> 00:07:11.560 to be principally interested in. Or what they 00:07:11.560 --> 00:07:14.660 are principally interested in is talking about 00:07:14.660 --> 00:07:17.980 the failures, where that person falls short, 00:07:18.160 --> 00:07:21.699 where are the gaps that exist in that person's 00:07:21.699 --> 00:07:25.319 exercise of their role in the organization or 00:07:25.319 --> 00:07:28.439 how they're showing up in the organization. And 00:07:28.439 --> 00:07:32.819 so when I have them frame this conversation first 00:07:32.819 --> 00:07:37.589 around the reality of gifts, and that each person 00:07:37.589 --> 00:07:39.930 is a gift and has gifts and let's try to identify 00:07:39.930 --> 00:07:42.149 what those best gifts are and how are those gifts 00:07:42.149 --> 00:07:44.709 having an impact. Do you know what that does? 00:07:45.529 --> 00:07:49.889 It's a very fascinating thing. I have done over 00:07:49.889 --> 00:07:52.730 a thousand hours of these types of one -on -one 00:07:52.730 --> 00:07:56.209 interviews to gain insight into individuals' 00:07:56.449 --> 00:08:00.389 lives and all of that. It's a way for me to start 00:08:00.389 --> 00:08:04.250 sowing seeds in each of these interviews that 00:08:04.250 --> 00:08:06.610 I'm doing. In each of these interview assessments 00:08:06.610 --> 00:08:09.790 that I'm doing, I'm already starting to sow the 00:08:09.790 --> 00:08:13.970 seeds of the gift message, that each person is 00:08:13.970 --> 00:08:18.490 a gift and has gifts. And what will often happen, 00:08:18.529 --> 00:08:21.209 not always, but will often happen in this conversation 00:08:21.209 --> 00:08:25.430 is that I will have an opportunity to very briefly, 00:08:25.550 --> 00:08:29.569 in sort of like a laser -like fashion, talk with 00:08:29.569 --> 00:08:33.289 them about the gift that he or she is. the person 00:08:33.289 --> 00:08:35.090 that I'm interviewing. There's got nothing to 00:08:35.090 --> 00:08:36.789 do with the coaching engagement other than you're 00:08:36.789 --> 00:08:39.070 an interviewee and just was to help me get insight 00:08:39.070 --> 00:08:40.789 into that other person. Well, I'm going to just 00:08:40.789 --> 00:08:42.450 give you a quick little gift here. I'm going 00:08:42.450 --> 00:08:45.889 to help you just quickly identify your best gift 00:08:45.889 --> 00:08:48.610 and how that's making a difference. And that 00:08:48.610 --> 00:08:50.809 becomes a way for them to say, oh, okay, I get 00:08:50.809 --> 00:08:53.350 that. So now I know how to share about this person. 00:08:53.429 --> 00:08:55.669 And guess what it does? It also changes the atmosphere. 00:08:56.029 --> 00:08:59.769 It changes the consciousness, right? How they're 00:08:59.769 --> 00:09:05.509 approaching this conversation of, oh, I'm here 00:09:05.509 --> 00:09:08.009 to help give insight into this person. The first 00:09:08.009 --> 00:09:10.070 thing and the most important thing and the foundational 00:09:10.070 --> 00:09:13.730 thing that we want to focus on are the gifts 00:09:13.730 --> 00:09:17.009 that this person has, the gift this person is 00:09:17.009 --> 00:09:18.950 who's bringing these gifts to bear, and what 00:09:18.950 --> 00:09:23.029 difference they're making. And so that, brothers 00:09:23.029 --> 00:09:28.090 and sisters, that has big impacts on how we're 00:09:28.090 --> 00:09:30.950 living our lives. And so my kids, they kind of 00:09:30.950 --> 00:09:35.159 joke about it. They joke about when I would be 00:09:35.159 --> 00:09:37.899 meeting with them growing up one -on -one to 00:09:37.899 --> 00:09:44.299 correct them. They did something wrong and, okay, 00:09:44.360 --> 00:09:49.940 let's meet with dad. Or I'm here to help them 00:09:49.940 --> 00:09:52.419 advance or improve in something where they're 00:09:52.419 --> 00:09:56.179 falling short. They know that they're going to 00:09:56.179 --> 00:10:01.519 get a gift sandwich. And this is funny because 00:10:01.519 --> 00:10:05.700 it's really funny because when I sit down, the 00:10:05.700 --> 00:10:06.879 first thing I'll say is, you know, you're such 00:10:06.879 --> 00:10:08.960 a gift. And here are the ways that I see you 00:10:08.960 --> 00:10:11.360 being a gift in this family and the way that 00:10:11.360 --> 00:10:14.399 God shines through you and in all of this. And 00:10:14.399 --> 00:10:16.120 they're like, I thought I was in trouble. I thought 00:10:16.120 --> 00:10:18.419 I was going to get something really bad said 00:10:18.419 --> 00:10:22.080 to me. And then on the basis of that gift that 00:10:22.080 --> 00:10:25.340 I see that you are, let's talk about how you 00:10:25.340 --> 00:10:28.490 showed up in that instance. or how you're showing 00:10:28.490 --> 00:10:30.830 up right now in your relationship with your sibling, 00:10:30.889 --> 00:10:33.269 or how you're showing up right now at school. 00:10:34.129 --> 00:10:38.350 And what I'm doing is, is I'm offering criticism 00:10:38.350 --> 00:10:41.950 that's not destructive, or it's much less likely 00:10:41.950 --> 00:10:45.250 to be destructive, but it's constructive. Because 00:10:45.250 --> 00:10:49.470 it's being built on a foundation of, look me 00:10:49.470 --> 00:10:54.830 in the eyes, you are a gift. I see that. I acknowledge, 00:10:54.990 --> 00:10:56.929 I want you to know that. I want you to sense 00:10:56.929 --> 00:10:59.789 that that's what's radiating forth from me and 00:10:59.789 --> 00:11:01.730 you can see it in my eyes that you are a gift. 00:11:02.330 --> 00:11:06.370 And at the same time, you need to know I am really 00:11:06.370 --> 00:11:12.289 upset. I am angry at what you've done, how you've 00:11:12.289 --> 00:11:16.149 fallen short and settled for less. This is not 00:11:16.149 --> 00:11:18.590 something I'm going to accept and neither should 00:11:18.590 --> 00:11:22.600 you. And now let's talk about that. And so we'll 00:11:22.600 --> 00:11:25.559 discuss that and we'll come up with, okay, what's 00:11:25.559 --> 00:11:27.799 going to be the punishment or the next steps 00:11:27.799 --> 00:11:30.899 that will be followed up. And then when that 00:11:30.899 --> 00:11:37.379 is completed, I will finish with the thank you. 00:11:38.000 --> 00:11:42.200 And I want you to shine even more brightly this 00:11:42.200 --> 00:11:45.000 beautiful gift that you are. And so there's the 00:11:45.000 --> 00:11:48.000 gift sandwich. I begin with that, with the bun, 00:11:48.059 --> 00:11:51.259 the really yummy tasting bread. And then we get 00:11:51.259 --> 00:11:53.539 to the meat, which is the heart of the matter 00:11:53.539 --> 00:11:55.740 that we need to talk about. And then we finish 00:11:55.740 --> 00:11:58.240 with the bottom side of the bun or the top side 00:11:58.240 --> 00:12:00.539 of the bun, however you want to say it. So that 00:12:00.539 --> 00:12:04.580 you're going to be asked to take in a lot here, 00:12:04.899 --> 00:12:08.399 oh loved one of mine, but you're going to be 00:12:08.399 --> 00:12:11.000 asked to take it in in a context, in a sandwich 00:12:11.000 --> 00:12:15.360 that is marked by this reality that you're a 00:12:15.360 --> 00:12:21.029 gift. So honestly, when this... This then helps 00:12:21.029 --> 00:12:23.049 shape and mold the other questions that show 00:12:23.049 --> 00:12:26.029 up in the assessment. I'll bring those out into 00:12:26.029 --> 00:12:28.730 the open at some point with you as well. But 00:12:28.730 --> 00:12:32.409 just to say right now, beginning like that has 00:12:32.409 --> 00:12:36.409 such a power in impacting the nature of what 00:12:36.409 --> 00:12:38.450 else is going to show up in the rest of that 00:12:38.450 --> 00:12:42.309 interview. And so I encourage you to think about 00:12:42.309 --> 00:12:46.289 that. Ponder that, that little bit of insight. 00:12:46.960 --> 00:12:49.720 and see how you might use it. Take action on 00:12:49.720 --> 00:12:52.179 that the next time that you're going to have 00:12:52.179 --> 00:12:55.059 a crucial conversation with a loved one. You 00:12:55.059 --> 00:12:56.840 know, one where there's a lot at stake or one 00:12:56.840 --> 00:12:58.980 where there's something that you need to address. 00:12:59.779 --> 00:13:05.700 Can I serve it up in a gift sandwich? And so 00:13:05.700 --> 00:13:10.940 it's an important thing to be thinking about. 00:13:12.559 --> 00:13:16.019 So as a coach, yes, I'm there to identify the 00:13:16.019 --> 00:13:18.340 assets or the gifts that will help this person 00:13:18.340 --> 00:13:20.919 advance and help this person to, again, shine 00:13:20.919 --> 00:13:23.220 more brightly and be more impactful in the organization. 00:13:23.419 --> 00:13:26.460 So that's called good to great coaching. Coaching 00:13:26.460 --> 00:13:29.620 good to great. You take high performers and you 00:13:29.620 --> 00:13:32.159 help them excel even greater. Now, even those 00:13:32.159 --> 00:13:34.299 high performers have what's called a shadow side 00:13:34.299 --> 00:13:37.100 because very often, which is fascinating, is 00:13:37.100 --> 00:13:40.679 what that person is the best at also has this 00:13:41.409 --> 00:13:43.929 shadow side to it where all of a sudden that 00:13:43.929 --> 00:13:46.850 best gift is starting to have negative consequences. 00:13:47.629 --> 00:13:49.929 And there's a basic reason for it. And what is 00:13:49.929 --> 00:13:53.409 it? Well, I'm good at this. And so I naturally 00:13:53.409 --> 00:13:56.309 flow into it. I see the positive impact it has. 00:13:56.429 --> 00:13:59.470 So I'll continue to do it. And even then, when 00:13:59.470 --> 00:14:04.250 I move outside the path where that gift in its 00:14:04.250 --> 00:14:08.110 application or its utilization is going to have 00:14:08.110 --> 00:14:12.950 this really beautiful productive impact to it. 00:14:13.029 --> 00:14:15.730 I've moved outside it. And now it's the thing 00:14:15.730 --> 00:14:17.429 that I'm not just defaulting to, but I'm kind 00:14:17.429 --> 00:14:20.230 of using entirely and I'm missing out on the 00:14:20.230 --> 00:14:24.029 other side. I'm missing out on the thing that 00:14:24.029 --> 00:14:26.889 will counterbalance that. And so then all of 00:14:26.889 --> 00:14:29.350 a sudden that gift becomes the brokenness. It 00:14:29.350 --> 00:14:32.450 has that broken side to it. And so whether it's 00:14:32.450 --> 00:14:36.370 that or whether it's other aspects of an executive's 00:14:36.370 --> 00:14:39.169 life, there's that side where it's called turnaround 00:14:39.169 --> 00:14:42.789 coaching. where part of a coaching engagement 00:14:42.789 --> 00:14:46.009 is helping someone turn around from heading in 00:14:46.009 --> 00:14:49.710 the wrong direction. And so typically, there's 00:14:49.710 --> 00:14:52.610 a leading with one or the other. You're a good 00:14:52.610 --> 00:14:54.470 to great coach, and you happen to also deal with 00:14:54.470 --> 00:14:57.549 the shadow sides, or you're a turnaround coach. 00:14:57.769 --> 00:15:00.549 And part of what helps them turn around is helping 00:15:00.549 --> 00:15:09.879 to recover some of what they're good at. Our 00:15:09.879 --> 00:15:12.399 devoted to coaching insights shared with you 00:15:12.399 --> 00:15:15.120 that you can apply into your life. I'm sharing 00:15:15.120 --> 00:15:18.259 with you this and I begin with a prayer, right? 00:15:18.340 --> 00:15:20.679 And in this prayer, I'm referencing the reality 00:15:20.679 --> 00:15:22.820 that we're in this Lenten season. We're on this 00:15:22.820 --> 00:15:25.360 journey through the desert and we're both implementing 00:15:25.360 --> 00:15:28.639 things to grow. strengthen ourselves, so spiritual 00:15:28.639 --> 00:15:31.279 training asceticism, as well as to put to death 00:15:31.279 --> 00:15:33.779 those parts of our lives that are holding us 00:15:33.779 --> 00:15:36.059 back in spiritual bondage. That's mortification, 00:15:36.360 --> 00:15:38.919 right? So that's ascetical theology. That's that 00:15:38.919 --> 00:15:41.259 mystical theology, sorry. That's that theology 00:15:41.259 --> 00:15:43.620 of growing in holiness and growing to shine more 00:15:43.620 --> 00:15:47.580 brightly with the face of Christ. And what's 00:15:47.580 --> 00:15:52.019 interesting is that I will typically, especially 00:15:52.019 --> 00:15:54.360 if I'm in a faith setting, I will, of course, 00:15:54.360 --> 00:15:59.940 I begin my sessions with prayer and so what is 00:15:59.940 --> 00:16:02.950 fascinating though is that in Typically, clients 00:16:02.950 --> 00:16:04.450 are very open to that because they're working 00:16:04.450 --> 00:16:06.649 with me because I have a background in faith 00:16:06.649 --> 00:16:10.169 and I'm going to bring that to bear. And so being 00:16:10.169 --> 00:16:12.210 able to begin with a prayer is a beautiful way, 00:16:12.250 --> 00:16:14.690 again, of welcoming the Lord into the midst of 00:16:14.690 --> 00:16:16.990 us. Remember, coaching is some of the answers 00:16:16.990 --> 00:16:18.789 lie within you. Some of the answers lie within 00:16:18.789 --> 00:16:21.669 me. Some of the answers come from beyond us. 00:16:21.830 --> 00:16:23.529 And so when we're consciously, intentionally 00:16:23.529 --> 00:16:26.129 beginning with a prayer, we're asking the Lord 00:16:26.129 --> 00:16:28.899 to be at work and to speak. And one of the ways 00:16:28.899 --> 00:16:31.059 that I pray when I'm praying with someone at 00:16:31.059 --> 00:16:33.279 the beginning of a coaching session, and honestly, 00:16:33.419 --> 00:16:37.159 I say coaching session, but it's a routine thing 00:16:37.159 --> 00:16:40.019 for me to have someone say, hey, I want to bounce 00:16:40.019 --> 00:16:43.779 something off of you. I, today, full disclosure, 00:16:43.960 --> 00:16:46.539 got two text messages from two different people 00:16:46.539 --> 00:16:49.759 that are part of my life who said, hey, can I 00:16:49.759 --> 00:16:51.799 get together with you? I want to talk with you 00:16:51.799 --> 00:16:54.340 about something. And so those are, you know, 00:16:54.360 --> 00:16:57.080 a cup of coffee, have a conversation. And these 00:16:57.080 --> 00:17:00.399 are... coaching conversations, where when we 00:17:00.399 --> 00:17:02.580 get together, I'm going to say, hey, can we pray 00:17:02.580 --> 00:17:07.599 as we get started? And when we do, I want you 00:17:07.599 --> 00:17:09.500 to notice one of the things that I'll say. I'm 00:17:09.500 --> 00:17:11.559 going to imagine I'm working with you, because 00:17:11.559 --> 00:17:13.920 again, I'm sharing this with you because this 00:17:13.920 --> 00:17:17.160 is a way for you to consider praying in crucial 00:17:17.160 --> 00:17:19.220 conversations that you're having with your spouse 00:17:19.220 --> 00:17:22.359 or your kids or a loved one or a friend, right? 00:17:22.440 --> 00:17:23.900 And they want to talk about something important. 00:17:24.480 --> 00:17:25.920 Right in the name of the Father and the Son and 00:17:25.920 --> 00:17:28.279 the Holy Spirit. Amen. Heavenly Father, I thank 00:17:28.279 --> 00:17:30.960 you and I praise you in Jesus' holy name for 00:17:30.960 --> 00:17:33.019 the gift of our lives, for the graces that have 00:17:33.019 --> 00:17:35.440 brought us to this moment. And Lord Jesus, Be 00:17:35.440 --> 00:17:37.980 with us as a good shepherd. Shepherd us in this 00:17:37.980 --> 00:17:41.339 conversation. And Holy Spirit, we give you permission. 00:17:41.500 --> 00:17:46.059 We yield to you. We are docile to your promptings. 00:17:46.240 --> 00:17:49.039 And we ask for an anointing on this conversation 00:17:49.039 --> 00:17:52.500 that you, Holy Spirit, would prompt us into the 00:17:52.500 --> 00:17:54.220 right things to say that would be a blessing 00:17:54.220 --> 00:17:56.380 to this person I'm talking to, that it would 00:17:56.380 --> 00:17:58.880 glorify the Lord, and that it would be a fruitful 00:17:58.880 --> 00:18:00.960 use of the lives and the gifts you've given to 00:18:00.960 --> 00:18:05.170 us. And Lord, I ask that if anything that I share 00:18:05.170 --> 00:18:09.890 is not from you, I pray that it would not be 00:18:09.890 --> 00:18:13.250 heard. I pray that it would gently be washed 00:18:13.250 --> 00:18:16.630 away. But Lord, if there is something that I 00:18:16.630 --> 00:18:19.190 share that, and in this conversation happens, 00:18:19.250 --> 00:18:22.049 that is from you, I pray that it would take root 00:18:22.049 --> 00:18:25.029 and that it would blossom and it would have the 00:18:25.029 --> 00:18:28.529 effect that you intend. And I make this prayer, 00:18:28.569 --> 00:18:32.609 Jesus, in your holy name. Amen. And so what's 00:18:32.609 --> 00:18:35.609 fascinating is the people hear that, the person 00:18:35.609 --> 00:18:37.170 I'm talking to hears that, and they say, wow. 00:18:38.269 --> 00:18:41.910 And there are probably several reasons for the 00:18:41.910 --> 00:18:45.759 wow. One of them is... Wow, the Lord, he actually 00:18:45.759 --> 00:18:48.039 cares about this conversation. He actually set 00:18:48.039 --> 00:18:50.740 this up. He's part of this conversation. Number 00:18:50.740 --> 00:18:52.339 one. Number two, he's not just part of it, but 00:18:52.339 --> 00:18:54.759 he's not just a passive observer on the sidelines. 00:18:54.839 --> 00:18:57.119 No, we've put him right into the center. We've 00:18:57.119 --> 00:18:59.859 asked Jesus to shepherd it so that it glorifies 00:18:59.859 --> 00:19:02.660 the Lord. It's a blessing to us. And we've asked 00:19:02.660 --> 00:19:04.859 the Holy Spirit to prompt and anoint. When I 00:19:04.859 --> 00:19:08.059 say anoint, I mean that it's going to flow. It's 00:19:08.059 --> 00:19:11.099 going to flow in a way that just... makes things 00:19:11.099 --> 00:19:14.920 easier, like shockingly easier. And the kind 00:19:14.920 --> 00:19:18.200 of insights that come out are just not planned 00:19:18.200 --> 00:19:21.420 in advance, but they happen quickly and immediately. 00:19:22.099 --> 00:19:26.680 And so I've just witnessed. Oh, and then the 00:19:26.680 --> 00:19:29.619 last one is this, is I say, I'm not presuming 00:19:29.619 --> 00:19:34.059 that anything I share is coming from the Lord. 00:19:34.700 --> 00:19:39.109 I'm hoping. And I'm going to put my discernment, 00:19:39.109 --> 00:19:41.490 my sensitivity onto the Spirit, and I'm going 00:19:41.490 --> 00:19:44.109 to share in accord with my background. But I 00:19:44.109 --> 00:19:47.309 really do pray, and I mean it, that if there's 00:19:47.309 --> 00:19:50.970 something that is not from God, that they might 00:19:50.970 --> 00:19:52.849 hear it in the moment, they might be struck by 00:19:52.849 --> 00:19:54.710 it in the moment, but when they leave that moment, 00:19:54.829 --> 00:19:59.089 it's amazing. It's amazing how insights that... 00:19:59.450 --> 00:20:01.170 They might be heard and they might think, I am 00:20:01.170 --> 00:20:03.569 never going to forget that powerful insight that 00:20:03.569 --> 00:20:07.309 just came to my life in this conversation. I 00:20:07.309 --> 00:20:09.289 am never going to forget that. And they walk 00:20:09.289 --> 00:20:12.670 out of the room and they forget it. And they'll 00:20:12.670 --> 00:20:16.440 say, how did we say that again? How did that 00:20:16.440 --> 00:20:19.059 happen again? I think I've gotten two emails 00:20:19.059 --> 00:20:21.259 in the last couple of days from people that I've 00:20:21.259 --> 00:20:24.839 spoken with. I really appreciated meeting with 00:20:24.839 --> 00:20:27.539 you and someone else. Thank you so much. We're 00:20:27.539 --> 00:20:31.119 looking forward to meeting with you again. That's 00:20:31.119 --> 00:20:33.539 why I will say when I'm meeting over online, 00:20:33.759 --> 00:20:36.079 hey, can we record this? I'll give you permission 00:20:36.079 --> 00:20:38.339 to record it because something might just come 00:20:38.339 --> 00:20:40.460 up that just might be that striking to you that 00:20:40.460 --> 00:20:43.720 you won't want to forget it. Those that say no, 00:20:44.359 --> 00:20:46.680 almost assuredly will regret it. They regret 00:20:46.680 --> 00:20:48.420 it afterwards and they'll say, wait a minute, 00:20:48.460 --> 00:20:50.140 wait a minute, what? Can we just start recording 00:20:50.140 --> 00:20:54.420 now? Right? And because the power of an insight 00:20:54.420 --> 00:20:56.819 is that it does take root, but just like you 00:20:56.819 --> 00:20:59.700 hear the gospel of the four types of soil, that 00:20:59.700 --> 00:21:03.019 seed, that seed of the word, that word of God, 00:21:03.180 --> 00:21:06.000 that insight that the Lord intended to be heard, 00:21:06.339 --> 00:21:09.660 there's no guarantee that it's going to find 00:21:09.660 --> 00:21:13.220 itself in that rich soil that will yield a hundredfold. 00:21:14.140 --> 00:21:16.779 there are three chances out of four it can land 00:21:16.779 --> 00:21:19.660 on the rocky soil and be stolen by Satan. It 00:21:19.660 --> 00:21:22.160 doesn't have depth. And so it doesn't have the 00:21:22.160 --> 00:21:24.059 strength to grow or it gets caught up in the 00:21:24.059 --> 00:21:26.460 brambles, anxieties and stresses of the day and 00:21:26.460 --> 00:21:29.339 it gets choked off. And so we don't want that 00:21:29.339 --> 00:21:31.779 to happen. That's honestly one of the reasons 00:21:31.779 --> 00:21:34.740 why coaching tends to be a relationship. It tends 00:21:34.740 --> 00:21:37.599 to be, let's meet for a handful of sessions because 00:21:37.599 --> 00:21:40.400 the insights that come in one session, you kind 00:21:40.400 --> 00:21:42.539 of circle around the track and you have a chance 00:21:42.539 --> 00:21:45.779 to do the next session and be able to say, oh, 00:21:45.839 --> 00:21:48.160 that's right. Let's remember this. By the way, 00:21:48.160 --> 00:21:49.500 that's another reason why I love whiteboards. 00:21:49.940 --> 00:21:52.460 Again, I'm looking at five big old whiteboards, 00:21:52.579 --> 00:21:54.700 probably four feet by three feet whiteboards 00:21:54.700 --> 00:21:57.579 in front of me because I can see the sense of 00:21:57.579 --> 00:21:59.000 the whole. And when I'm meeting with people, 00:21:59.059 --> 00:22:00.599 I'll say, okay, let's walk through this again 00:22:00.599 --> 00:22:02.980 and map things out with them and start writing 00:22:02.980 --> 00:22:04.700 stuff down that we've covered before and we're 00:22:04.700 --> 00:22:07.059 synthesizing it. And it's like, oh yeah, that's 00:22:07.059 --> 00:22:09.299 right. Oh yeah, that's right. Oh, let me try 00:22:09.299 --> 00:22:12.720 that. And it's amazing how it takes time and 00:22:12.720 --> 00:22:15.480 time and time again to integrate a new insight 00:22:15.480 --> 00:22:19.799 into one's life so that they're not just remembering 00:22:19.799 --> 00:22:23.420 it as information. They not only can speak it 00:22:23.420 --> 00:22:26.539 back because now it's becoming some knowledge, 00:22:26.579 --> 00:22:30.240 but they begin to think on the basis of that 00:22:30.240 --> 00:22:33.460 insight. Did you hear that? That's worthy of 00:22:33.460 --> 00:22:35.920 a whole much longer conversation. I typically 00:22:35.920 --> 00:22:39.160 talk about that when I'm working with a corporation 00:22:39.160 --> 00:22:43.299 on culture or a church leadership group on culture. 00:22:43.880 --> 00:22:47.140 It's that atmosphere. That's taken for granted. 00:22:47.140 --> 00:22:50.039 It's morally charged. And so what are the values 00:22:50.039 --> 00:22:52.799 that are in that atmosphere? Those are traced 00:22:52.799 --> 00:22:55.859 back to insights that have taken root and now 00:22:55.859 --> 00:23:00.220 begin to shape how we see and not just are parroted 00:23:00.220 --> 00:23:04.519 back in group settings. So the gift message, 00:23:04.579 --> 00:23:06.640 you're a gift, right? They might say, oh, that's 00:23:06.640 --> 00:23:08.359 right, I forgot about that. And the next time 00:23:08.359 --> 00:23:09.619 they're saying, oh yeah, I am a gift, and why 00:23:09.619 --> 00:23:11.319 am I a gift? Well, there's only one of me in 00:23:11.319 --> 00:23:12.980 all of human history, and I'm going to display 00:23:12.980 --> 00:23:15.180 something about the goodness and beauty and truth 00:23:15.180 --> 00:23:17.259 of being a human being, or if in a faith context, 00:23:17.519 --> 00:23:19.500 that Christ is going to shine through me in a 00:23:19.500 --> 00:23:21.200 way that's unique. That means that there's something 00:23:21.200 --> 00:23:23.579 about me that's irreplaceable. I'm one of a kind. 00:23:23.660 --> 00:23:26.160 Human history will never see me again. That's 00:23:26.160 --> 00:23:27.960 how God designed you. As a result of that, you're 00:23:27.960 --> 00:23:30.779 precious. You have this dignity, right? So now 00:23:30.779 --> 00:23:32.809 those truths, eventually people can remember 00:23:32.809 --> 00:23:35.210 them. Eventually people will be able to say them 00:23:35.210 --> 00:23:37.009 maybe quicker and better than I can say them. 00:23:37.369 --> 00:23:46.250 But the process is you start with learning the 00:23:46.250 --> 00:23:49.990 ideas. Then those ideas will begin to take root 00:23:49.990 --> 00:23:53.829 in your mind where you can remember them and 00:23:53.829 --> 00:23:57.809 they can begin to show up in your speech. But 00:23:57.809 --> 00:23:59.490 eventually they're going to take root in your 00:23:59.490 --> 00:24:01.769 heart and they're going to blossom forth in your 00:24:01.769 --> 00:24:04.950 life how you see. So not only will you begin 00:24:04.950 --> 00:24:08.549 to see yourself as this gift that has been given 00:24:08.549 --> 00:24:10.589 to you as a gift through the gazing in the eyes 00:24:10.589 --> 00:24:12.829 of love, especially the Lord, but then even other 00:24:12.829 --> 00:24:14.670 human beings who become conduits of the love 00:24:14.670 --> 00:24:17.430 of the Lord. But then you begin to be able to 00:24:17.430 --> 00:24:20.390 talk about people being gifts. You begin to talk 00:24:20.390 --> 00:24:24.130 about people in affirming ways. But eventually 00:24:24.130 --> 00:24:27.190 then it becomes how you see. It becomes how you 00:24:27.190 --> 00:24:31.230 see. And when people know that about you, oh, 00:24:31.349 --> 00:24:35.589 when you radiate this gift message into the world 00:24:35.589 --> 00:24:40.750 around you, it changes things. It does. It has 00:24:40.750 --> 00:24:47.190 a tangible impact. I think I told you last, I 00:24:47.190 --> 00:24:49.269 think it was in my last Thursday program, I was 00:24:49.269 --> 00:24:52.009 mentioning to someone who said, Yes, I want to 00:24:52.009 --> 00:24:53.849 meet with you. I want to be coached by you. And 00:24:53.849 --> 00:24:55.450 I just said something about the gift that that 00:24:55.450 --> 00:24:59.970 person was and they started crying. And when 00:24:59.970 --> 00:25:04.450 I'm at a restaurant or I'm going through a line 00:25:04.450 --> 00:25:08.250 and there's someone who's at a supermarket, the 00:25:08.250 --> 00:25:11.329 person at the cash register checking out my stuff, 00:25:11.769 --> 00:25:17.509 I will almost assuredly, almost without exception, 00:25:17.769 --> 00:25:19.490 like when I'm at a restaurant, what's your name? 00:25:19.930 --> 00:25:22.369 They don't even tell me their name. What's your 00:25:22.369 --> 00:25:25.069 name? And when they come back, thank you, and 00:25:25.069 --> 00:25:27.470 I'll speak their name to them. And if they're 00:25:27.470 --> 00:25:29.069 there for a moment and it doesn't look like they're 00:25:29.069 --> 00:25:32.130 just rushed, I'll engage them as a person who 00:25:32.130 --> 00:25:35.210 has a name. And the difference that that makes 00:25:35.210 --> 00:25:41.789 is huge. It's huge. And it's more common than 00:25:41.789 --> 00:25:48.849 less that the person waiting the table will comment 00:25:48.849 --> 00:25:52.710 on that. And their demeanor, their attitude, 00:25:52.789 --> 00:25:59.349 it's enjoyable. It's life -giving. And they're 00:25:59.349 --> 00:26:02.309 not just taking on that demeanor. You can tell 00:26:02.309 --> 00:26:05.269 there's something about they enjoy the interaction 00:26:05.269 --> 00:26:09.529 because they're seen as a person. So it's a powerful 00:26:09.529 --> 00:26:13.109 thing. So what I'm sharing with you that in the 00:26:13.109 --> 00:26:17.000 end... Your capacity to sit down across from 00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:19.319 your kid and you're going to correct them for 00:26:19.319 --> 00:26:22.619 bad behavior and you want to serve up a gift 00:26:22.619 --> 00:26:29.359 sandwich. It's going to mean more than you simply 00:26:29.359 --> 00:26:34.420 having the correct method. Okay, let's see now. 00:26:34.539 --> 00:26:37.130 Okay, hold on. Before I correct you for that 00:26:37.130 --> 00:26:39.589 bad thing you did, let me see if I can come up 00:26:39.589 --> 00:26:43.269 with three good things that are affirmations 00:26:43.269 --> 00:26:45.529 of gifts that you have. Okay, hold on. Let me 00:26:45.529 --> 00:26:49.150 see if I can come up with them. And you can see 00:26:49.150 --> 00:26:51.609 it. But wait a minute. Oh, finally, the juicy 00:26:51.609 --> 00:26:54.730 part is here. I get to correct you for what you've 00:26:54.730 --> 00:26:58.309 done. Trust me, that's what's going to be radiating 00:26:58.309 --> 00:27:02.359 forth from you. Where is the energy? What's the 00:27:02.359 --> 00:27:06.259 tone of voice? What's the attitude that is oozing 00:27:06.259 --> 00:27:09.000 out of you in that conversation? When they look 00:27:09.000 --> 00:27:10.880 in your eyes, do they see you're a gift or they 00:27:10.880 --> 00:27:15.140 see you're a knucklehead, right? You can't fake 00:27:15.140 --> 00:27:18.670 that. So that's the path that we're on. That's 00:27:18.670 --> 00:27:20.289 the path that we're on. If we're going to grow 00:27:20.289 --> 00:27:25.369 in this dialogical capacity to manifest Christ 00:27:25.369 --> 00:27:28.009 in all of these circumstances, and we want to 00:27:28.009 --> 00:27:31.490 be useful to the Lord, and be useful in such 00:27:31.490 --> 00:27:33.390 a way that the things that I talk about are things 00:27:33.390 --> 00:27:35.230 that you intend me to say, and those things that 00:27:35.230 --> 00:27:37.109 were not meant to be heard, I pray that they 00:27:37.109 --> 00:27:41.309 are not heard. Bring that into your conversations. 00:27:42.130 --> 00:27:43.670 You know, you're taking a walk with a friend. 00:27:44.639 --> 00:27:47.559 You're meeting up in your Bible study and you're 00:27:47.559 --> 00:27:49.420 going to be sharing maybe some personal things, 00:27:49.700 --> 00:27:53.259 right? That's a beautiful prayer to pray. Consider 00:27:53.259 --> 00:27:56.140 integrating a prayer like that. That all came 00:27:56.140 --> 00:27:59.339 from my coaching work and I hand it on to you 00:27:59.339 --> 00:28:01.599 as a gift. All right, we'll be back in a minute. 00:28:07.500 --> 00:28:11.970 So this brings me back around to... the theme 00:28:11.970 --> 00:28:13.789 that I mentioned to you at the very beginning 00:28:13.789 --> 00:28:16.730 of the program. You might be saying, hey, I thought 00:28:16.730 --> 00:28:19.309 he was going to talk about intercessory prayer 00:28:19.309 --> 00:28:22.329 in the life of the leader. He's been talking 00:28:22.329 --> 00:28:25.049 all about coaching engagements and assessing 00:28:25.049 --> 00:28:29.089 people in interviews and rooms and all of that. 00:28:29.930 --> 00:28:32.230 But did you track the flow of the conversation? 00:28:32.950 --> 00:28:36.089 Did you see how I've been developing it? And 00:28:36.089 --> 00:28:38.690 I said to you at the very end of that last section, 00:28:38.869 --> 00:28:43.440 you can't fake it. Okay, well, how do we become 00:28:43.440 --> 00:28:47.480 authentic then? How do we grow in the authenticity 00:28:47.480 --> 00:28:52.980 and in the profundity of the words we speak having 00:28:52.980 --> 00:28:58.440 a big impact? Really, truly impressing itself 00:28:58.440 --> 00:29:02.420 into the minds and hearts of those that are around 00:29:02.420 --> 00:29:06.480 us, in our families, in our marriages, and yes, 00:29:06.539 --> 00:29:11.589 in our workplaces as well. Well, intercessory 00:29:11.589 --> 00:29:19.329 prayer. It is a very powerful and important lever. 00:29:19.650 --> 00:29:22.049 That's not why you do it, but it's a powerful 00:29:22.049 --> 00:29:26.750 differentiator and difference maker in your life. 00:29:26.849 --> 00:29:31.349 If you commit to pray for those that are under 00:29:31.349 --> 00:29:35.609 your care, those that the Lord has planted in 00:29:35.609 --> 00:29:38.910 your lives. Now, who's that? That could be... 00:29:38.960 --> 00:29:42.980 applied both to, guess what, the family and the 00:29:42.980 --> 00:29:47.079 workplace. It could be applied to your church 00:29:47.079 --> 00:29:50.920 men's group or Bible study. And yes, it can apply 00:29:50.920 --> 00:29:55.559 as well to your networking group and your professional 00:29:55.559 --> 00:29:59.759 associations that you're a member of. Fascinating. 00:29:59.900 --> 00:30:06.680 I was at Mass. Uh, and I was praying for at mass. 00:30:06.759 --> 00:30:10.700 It popped into my mind to pray for this executive 00:30:10.700 --> 00:30:13.839 that, uh, it just, I don't even know. It just 00:30:13.839 --> 00:30:15.519 kind of came out of the blue. I should be praying 00:30:15.519 --> 00:30:19.680 for that person. And so I did, I didn't, it didn't 00:30:19.680 --> 00:30:22.140 come into my mind, but there's a way in which 00:30:22.140 --> 00:30:24.359 here's the, here's the thing. When, when you 00:30:24.359 --> 00:30:27.119 pray for someone, it shifts how you see them. 00:30:27.799 --> 00:30:30.240 I remember talking to Carrie, I was coaching 00:30:30.240 --> 00:30:36.839 a, uh, a church leader. I talk about good to 00:30:36.839 --> 00:30:38.779 great and I talk about a turnaround situation. 00:30:39.380 --> 00:30:43.859 This was more of a turnaround situation and that's 00:30:43.859 --> 00:30:46.859 not my best gift. My best gift is really working 00:30:46.859 --> 00:30:49.420 with high performers who want to get to the next 00:30:49.420 --> 00:30:51.759 level rather than those who are really struggling 00:30:51.759 --> 00:30:53.619 and let me turn them around. Those are people 00:30:53.619 --> 00:30:57.519 that tend to do better with therapist -based 00:30:57.519 --> 00:31:00.289 coaching. coaches who come from a therapeutic 00:31:00.289 --> 00:31:02.609 background, like the Pupkeks, something like 00:31:02.609 --> 00:31:06.430 that. I do well with high performers who are 00:31:06.430 --> 00:31:10.269 sort of stuck and who are just trying to break 00:31:10.269 --> 00:31:14.009 through or gain a sense of whether it's momentum 00:31:14.009 --> 00:31:18.769 or insight to decide among directions to discern 00:31:18.769 --> 00:31:21.450 and then get some accountability and some support 00:31:21.450 --> 00:31:23.369 and some encouragement to get to that next place. 00:31:23.529 --> 00:31:28.410 I love that stuff. And that's kind of the vein 00:31:28.410 --> 00:31:31.589 that I've flowed into. So I happened to be in 00:31:31.589 --> 00:31:33.430 this circumstance where someone said to me, could 00:31:33.430 --> 00:31:36.710 you meet with this guy? He's got a lot of gifts, 00:31:36.769 --> 00:31:39.029 but he's really struggling to figure stuff out. 00:31:39.329 --> 00:31:43.509 And so met with him, poured some hours into this 00:31:43.509 --> 00:31:46.829 coaching engagement, met with him again, poured 00:31:46.829 --> 00:31:50.869 some more hours into it. And it was so frustrating. 00:31:51.490 --> 00:31:55.730 And so I came, I can remember. having dinner 00:31:55.730 --> 00:31:59.210 with Kerry and talking about this, and I just 00:31:59.210 --> 00:32:04.569 shared some frustration about this guy that I 00:32:04.569 --> 00:32:09.190 was coaching. And Kerry said, you know what, 00:32:09.250 --> 00:32:12.589 you might have more impact on him if you stop 00:32:12.589 --> 00:32:14.430 complaining about him and started praying for 00:32:14.430 --> 00:32:22.349 him. And so I'm like, thank you, dear. I'm always 00:32:22.349 --> 00:32:26.210 going to get the truth. spoken to me by my wife. 00:32:26.329 --> 00:32:30.529 I love that. What a great gift. Not afraid to 00:32:30.529 --> 00:32:33.089 speak into my life. And so I took the critique 00:32:33.089 --> 00:32:36.450 and I started praying for him. And what's so 00:32:36.450 --> 00:32:40.349 fascinating was I started to intercede for him 00:32:40.349 --> 00:32:44.789 to, you know, Lord, help him with this because 00:32:44.789 --> 00:32:47.769 Lord, he is so frustrating, blah, blah, blah. 00:32:48.630 --> 00:32:52.480 Basically. The whole funnel of my frustration 00:32:52.480 --> 00:32:55.339 just entered into my prayer. And I'm like, Lord, 00:32:55.619 --> 00:32:58.259 I've given him all these amazing insights, and 00:32:58.259 --> 00:33:02.440 he just leaves them behind and doesn't respond 00:33:02.440 --> 00:33:05.859 to them. And then I commit all this time to him, 00:33:05.900 --> 00:33:07.579 and I'm giving him all this best energy, and 00:33:07.579 --> 00:33:10.700 he just reverts back to the old ways of doing 00:33:10.700 --> 00:33:14.200 things. And it's like I wasn't even there. And 00:33:14.200 --> 00:33:17.839 after I poured out my beautiful, humble prayer 00:33:17.839 --> 00:33:23.869 to the Lord, about this church leader what i 00:33:23.869 --> 00:33:26.150 sensed the lord saying back to me was how do 00:33:26.150 --> 00:33:37.250 you like it how do you like it oh wow and so 00:33:37.250 --> 00:33:39.589 what is the lord saying the lord was saying hey 00:33:39.589 --> 00:33:44.819 uh welcome to my world I pour into you. I've 00:33:44.819 --> 00:33:47.140 committed myself to you. I'm constantly giving 00:33:47.140 --> 00:33:51.319 to you. I'm constantly pouring, giving you insights. 00:33:51.500 --> 00:33:53.640 And what do you do? You keep reverting back to 00:33:53.640 --> 00:33:55.380 your old behaviors. You keep settling for less. 00:33:55.539 --> 00:33:58.980 You don't like really hear what I'm asking of 00:33:58.980 --> 00:34:04.039 you and you don't respond well. Wow. Okay, Lord. 00:34:04.339 --> 00:34:09.940 Thank you. Thank you, Lord. And so I have to 00:34:09.940 --> 00:34:13.639 admit that. Coaching engagement, even though 00:34:13.639 --> 00:34:17.000 I was not successful as I term success, which 00:34:17.000 --> 00:34:20.860 was help this guy actually move forward, I was 00:34:20.860 --> 00:34:23.739 able to give him some good ideas and some directions 00:34:23.739 --> 00:34:25.480 and all that, but I wasn't going to be the right 00:34:25.480 --> 00:34:28.539 guy for him. But boy, he ended up giving me a 00:34:28.539 --> 00:34:33.059 huge gift. A huge gift. Actually, two gifts. 00:34:33.320 --> 00:34:38.019 The first gift was intercede. The importance 00:34:38.019 --> 00:34:42.170 and the power of interceding. for those whom 00:34:42.170 --> 00:34:49.090 you are striving to serve. And interceding, because 00:34:49.090 --> 00:34:52.250 it's a way to let God enter this circumstance. 00:34:52.250 --> 00:34:54.769 And in doing that, God can bring you light and 00:34:54.769 --> 00:34:58.469 insight that will be transformative. In this 00:34:58.469 --> 00:35:01.869 instance, the Lord humbled me with this transformative 00:35:01.869 --> 00:35:06.690 insight into the lack of responsiveness that 00:35:06.690 --> 00:35:11.199 I have to the Lord in my life. Wow. What a gift. 00:35:11.800 --> 00:35:14.559 And so I'm going to give you a quote from John 00:35:14.559 --> 00:35:17.920 of the cross. And it is, it's a humbling quote. 00:35:18.059 --> 00:35:21.340 It's from the spiritual canticle and it's relevant. 00:35:21.420 --> 00:35:24.199 And I use this with Catholic leaders specifically 00:35:24.199 --> 00:35:27.000 around. intercession, interceding. And again, 00:35:27.059 --> 00:35:28.900 you can hear this as a leader in your realm, 00:35:28.980 --> 00:35:31.059 right? Where's the Lord planted you where you 00:35:31.059 --> 00:35:33.920 are in front influencing people to move in the 00:35:33.920 --> 00:35:36.320 direction that God has for them to go in or the 00:35:36.320 --> 00:35:38.340 people. It could be a corporate setting, again, 00:35:38.420 --> 00:35:40.179 a business setting. It could be a church group. 00:35:40.280 --> 00:35:42.619 It could be your own family, right? It could 00:35:42.619 --> 00:35:44.659 be among your friends. You are influencing people 00:35:44.659 --> 00:35:48.039 to move in a direction. Okay, so you start praying 00:35:48.039 --> 00:35:51.480 for those people and watch what happens. Okay, 00:35:51.619 --> 00:35:54.469 John of the Cross, his quote, he says this. Let 00:35:54.469 --> 00:35:58.969 those then who are singularly active, who think 00:35:58.969 --> 00:36:01.630 they can win the world with their preaching and 00:36:01.630 --> 00:36:05.929 exterior works, observe here that they would 00:36:05.929 --> 00:36:11.150 profit the church and please God much more, not 00:36:11.150 --> 00:36:13.130 to mention the good example they would give, 00:36:13.369 --> 00:36:17.150 were they to spend at least half of this time 00:36:17.150 --> 00:36:22.550 with God in prayer. They would then certainly 00:36:23.210 --> 00:36:28.329 accomplish more and with less labor by one work 00:36:28.329 --> 00:36:33.469 than they otherwise would by a thousand. For 00:36:33.469 --> 00:36:36.590 through their prayer they would merit this result 00:36:36.590 --> 00:36:42.250 and themselves be spiritually strengthened. Without 00:36:42.250 --> 00:36:45.869 prayer they would do a great deal of hammering 00:36:45.869 --> 00:36:49.989 but accomplish little and sometimes nothing. 00:36:50.989 --> 00:36:58.849 and even at times cause harm. I hear that and 00:36:58.849 --> 00:37:04.070 it is just so striking, right? We accomplish 00:37:04.070 --> 00:37:06.929 more with less labor by one work than we would 00:37:06.929 --> 00:37:10.289 by a thousand because through their prayer, it's 00:37:10.289 --> 00:37:12.329 like we're opening the conduit of grace in God's 00:37:12.329 --> 00:37:14.710 action. And by the way, we're spiritually strengthened 00:37:14.710 --> 00:37:17.610 as well. But without prayer, we do a great deal 00:37:17.610 --> 00:37:19.389 of hammering, but accomplish little and sometimes 00:37:19.389 --> 00:37:22.190 nothing and even at times cause harm. How humbling 00:37:22.190 --> 00:37:26.130 is that? And there's only one challenge with 00:37:26.130 --> 00:37:32.050 this. We don't believe it. We don't believe it. 00:37:33.110 --> 00:37:38.150 And so if we did believe it, we'd act differently. 00:37:39.130 --> 00:37:41.650 I mentioned to you this Lenten challenge I'm 00:37:41.650 --> 00:37:44.250 facing where, okay, first thing I'm doing, I 00:37:44.250 --> 00:37:47.400 get up, I pray my rosary. And I would be praying 00:37:47.400 --> 00:37:50.079 otherwise. I would typically be doing spiritual 00:37:50.079 --> 00:37:52.360 reading and quiet prayer and journaling. But 00:37:52.360 --> 00:37:54.880 there's this conviction that I'm supposed to 00:37:54.880 --> 00:37:58.280 be praying a rosary first thing. And so, sure 00:37:58.280 --> 00:38:00.480 enough, I'm doing it. I'm still grumbling, but 00:38:00.480 --> 00:38:03.880 I'm doing it. I'm honoring the Lord and taking 00:38:03.880 --> 00:38:09.760 on penance and prayer to remember, wait a minute, 00:38:09.900 --> 00:38:13.039 I'm not just doing this for myself. I'm doing 00:38:13.039 --> 00:38:16.510 this. Here are the three phrases, on behalf of, 00:38:16.650 --> 00:38:21.170 in the place of, and for the sake of. On behalf 00:38:21.170 --> 00:38:24.829 of, in the place of, and for the sake of. You 00:38:24.829 --> 00:38:27.250 heard me mention this in my conversation with 00:38:27.250 --> 00:38:30.510 Father Pat Smith. It was a week or two ago. But 00:38:30.510 --> 00:38:34.829 a leader ought to embrace those three phrases. 00:38:36.130 --> 00:38:39.230 Because we really do lead our lives, we do really 00:38:39.230 --> 00:38:44.309 enact our lives, not just for ourselves. but 00:38:44.309 --> 00:38:46.989 on behalf of others. So it's on behalf of others 00:38:46.989 --> 00:38:48.550 that I'm going to fast. I'm going to pray. I'm 00:38:48.550 --> 00:38:50.789 going to give alms. I'm going to do penance. 00:38:50.789 --> 00:38:52.369 I'm going to deny myself. I'm going to take up 00:38:52.369 --> 00:38:57.210 a cross. It's for the sake of others that I'm 00:38:57.210 --> 00:38:59.969 going to do all of those things. It's in the 00:38:59.969 --> 00:39:03.289 place of others that I'm going to do those things. 00:39:05.110 --> 00:39:09.590 It's so interesting because I find that this 00:39:09.590 --> 00:39:13.630 intercessory prayer has taken a Padre Pio type 00:39:13.630 --> 00:39:18.829 turn. And it's worth me discussing it. I'll talk 00:39:18.829 --> 00:39:20.469 about it at another point, but it has to do with 00:39:20.469 --> 00:39:22.050 praying for souls that are near to death and 00:39:22.050 --> 00:39:23.889 far from God. So I'll just leave that here now. 00:39:24.309 --> 00:39:26.809 But just to say, it's a form of intercession. 00:39:27.480 --> 00:39:29.639 Remember now, intercession, petition is when 00:39:29.639 --> 00:39:31.559 we pray for ourselves. We ask for good things 00:39:31.559 --> 00:39:34.360 from God for ourselves. Should we do that? Absolutely. 00:39:34.719 --> 00:39:36.679 The Lord wants us to. What does he say? Ask, 00:39:36.860 --> 00:39:40.340 seek, and knock. He has every expectation that 00:39:40.340 --> 00:39:44.460 you are going to be petitioning him for good 00:39:44.460 --> 00:39:48.039 things for yourself. right? The importunate widow 00:39:48.039 --> 00:39:51.159 who keeps pestering the unjust judge. It's the 00:39:51.159 --> 00:39:53.300 neighbor who comes and knocks on the neighbor's 00:39:53.300 --> 00:39:56.900 door late at night because he has a friend come 00:39:56.900 --> 00:39:59.860 and he doesn't have food and get out of bed, 00:40:00.039 --> 00:40:02.820 right? And what does Jesus say? Ask, seek, and 00:40:02.820 --> 00:40:05.460 knock. And he does that continuously so that 00:40:05.460 --> 00:40:10.960 there's a sense of saying, yes, the Lord has 00:40:10.960 --> 00:40:13.239 good things for you. But intercession is when 00:40:13.239 --> 00:40:15.840 we pray. on behalf of others, for the sake of 00:40:15.840 --> 00:40:18.000 others, in the place of others, so that the good 00:40:18.000 --> 00:40:22.340 things will reach their lives. And so having 00:40:22.340 --> 00:40:26.380 the conviction, having that sense of confidence 00:40:26.380 --> 00:40:31.579 that the Lord intends to bless those that are 00:40:31.579 --> 00:40:37.980 in your life because of you is a really, like, 00:40:38.039 --> 00:40:42.880 light bulb goes on, this changes things type 00:40:42.880 --> 00:40:46.170 of moment. When we come back, I'm going to lay 00:40:46.170 --> 00:40:49.789 that point out a little bit more fully about 00:40:49.789 --> 00:40:53.630 what it means that God has willed that certain 00:40:53.630 --> 00:40:56.309 good things would come to the lives of those 00:40:56.309 --> 00:41:09.949 we love through our prayers. Beckerman. So, your 00:41:09.949 --> 00:41:13.800 intercessory prayer. is part of God's providential 00:41:13.800 --> 00:41:18.300 care expressed in the lives of those that are 00:41:18.300 --> 00:41:21.400 connected to you, that are around you, and especially 00:41:21.400 --> 00:41:26.400 those whom you lead. Let me break that open. 00:41:27.119 --> 00:41:30.800 Let me talk about my wife or my kids. Just let's 00:41:30.800 --> 00:41:33.820 start with my wife. Does God love Carrie? Yes, 00:41:33.840 --> 00:41:36.659 absolutely. Does God intend Carrie to have good 00:41:36.659 --> 00:41:39.809 things come to her life? Yes, absolutely. Does 00:41:39.809 --> 00:41:46.210 God give good things to Carrie despite me? Yes. 00:41:46.809 --> 00:41:50.510 Yeah, despite my lack of praying, despite my 00:41:50.510 --> 00:41:55.750 failures in her regard, despite her failures, 00:41:55.969 --> 00:41:59.969 God blesses her. So God blesses Carrie despite 00:41:59.969 --> 00:42:02.969 her and despite me. God blesses Carrie completely 00:42:02.969 --> 00:42:07.789 apart from her and apart from me. So apart from 00:42:07.789 --> 00:42:12.849 Carrie saying, Lord, bless me, God still blesses 00:42:12.849 --> 00:42:15.130 her. Blessed her with life, with new life when 00:42:15.130 --> 00:42:17.150 she was a baby, baptized, right? All the gifts 00:42:17.150 --> 00:42:19.170 and graces, the protection, the provision, the 00:42:19.170 --> 00:42:22.210 guidance that God gives to Carrie is so abundant. 00:42:22.610 --> 00:42:26.429 And she's not asking for it. She hasn't earned 00:42:26.429 --> 00:42:29.230 it or deserved it. It's just lavished upon her 00:42:29.230 --> 00:42:33.590 because of God's love. Okay. So if God does these 00:42:33.590 --> 00:42:38.929 things despite her, And apart from her, God also 00:42:38.929 --> 00:42:43.309 gives good things because of her, because of 00:42:43.309 --> 00:42:45.690 her own petitioning and praying. Okay, I got 00:42:45.690 --> 00:42:48.409 that too. We've already talked about that. But 00:42:48.409 --> 00:42:51.590 now here's the mysterious next part of it. There 00:42:51.590 --> 00:42:55.849 are blessings that the Lord has held in reserve 00:42:55.849 --> 00:43:01.269 for Carrie that his will, his intention, is that 00:43:01.269 --> 00:43:04.269 they would come into Carrie's life through my 00:43:04.269 --> 00:43:13.420 prayers. Wow. It is through my prayers and maybe 00:43:13.420 --> 00:43:17.119 mysteriously only through my prayers that certain 00:43:17.119 --> 00:43:20.340 gifts and graces and blessings are going to reach 00:43:20.340 --> 00:43:24.239 Carrie's life. Now that sounds really mysterious. 00:43:25.360 --> 00:43:29.039 You've already heard me bring up in the very 00:43:29.039 --> 00:43:33.119 first session where I talked about the linkage 00:43:33.119 --> 00:43:36.019 between my vision of coaching and the Catholic 00:43:36.019 --> 00:43:40.400 vision of spiritual direction, how one of the 00:43:40.400 --> 00:43:43.960 common laments in the greatest spiritual writers 00:43:43.960 --> 00:43:46.519 like John of the Cross and Francis de Sales and 00:43:46.519 --> 00:43:51.860 Alphonsus de Liguri is the dearth, the scarcity 00:43:51.860 --> 00:43:57.730 of wise, holy spiritual directors. And as a result, 00:43:57.869 --> 00:44:03.650 souls are not led and do not advance as far as 00:44:03.650 --> 00:44:09.369 they could have had they been led. And you got 00:44:09.369 --> 00:44:12.929 to say, wow, that's kind of a big deal. Like, 00:44:12.929 --> 00:44:18.570 look how seriously God takes our human involvement 00:44:18.570 --> 00:44:23.750 when it comes to the realization of his purpose 00:44:23.750 --> 00:44:28.760 and plan. for other people's lives. And so I 00:44:28.760 --> 00:44:32.719 want you to consider that quite seriously when 00:44:32.719 --> 00:44:37.599 it comes to your call to be an intercessor for 00:44:37.599 --> 00:44:42.260 those you love in particular, but even mysteriously 00:44:42.260 --> 00:44:45.920 for those you work with, for those that are around 00:44:45.920 --> 00:44:52.579 you. And so I want you to think of the scriptural 00:44:52.579 --> 00:44:57.789 example of this. That is the intercessor. And 00:44:57.789 --> 00:45:01.630 in the Old Testament, the model for the intercessor 00:45:01.630 --> 00:45:06.110 was the person who went and stood in the gap. 00:45:06.309 --> 00:45:08.690 The intercessor is someone who stands in the 00:45:08.690 --> 00:45:11.110 gap. And you'll even hear that language sometimes 00:45:11.110 --> 00:45:15.010 in Christian settings about, let's go stand in 00:45:15.010 --> 00:45:17.170 the gap for this person over here. And it's like, 00:45:17.230 --> 00:45:19.269 let's get together as these prayer warriors and 00:45:19.269 --> 00:45:21.250 we're going to raise our hands to heaven and 00:45:21.250 --> 00:45:23.090 we're going to cry out for the Lord to bless 00:45:23.090 --> 00:45:25.909 and to break into this one's life. And so there's 00:45:25.909 --> 00:45:28.409 like a movement of intercession and it's like 00:45:28.409 --> 00:45:30.690 standing in the gap. And what that referring 00:45:30.690 --> 00:45:33.230 to is the gap or the breach, standing in the 00:45:33.230 --> 00:45:40.099 breach, is it's a wartime, a warfare. um analogy 00:45:40.099 --> 00:45:43.400 and so as you know many cities were built on 00:45:43.400 --> 00:45:46.420 hilltops and they were walled as an essential 00:45:46.420 --> 00:45:49.699 means of protection against enemies and so if 00:45:49.699 --> 00:45:52.480 enemies came and attempted to overthrow a city 00:45:52.480 --> 00:45:55.719 they would they would be like looking for points 00:45:55.719 --> 00:45:59.000 of attack and when what they would do is they 00:45:59.000 --> 00:46:02.260 would concentrate their attack at a single point 00:46:02.260 --> 00:46:06.619 in the wall to weaken and eventually break that 00:46:06.619 --> 00:46:10.420 wall down And so once the wall was broken open, 00:46:10.599 --> 00:46:13.440 and you can imagine, just think of a wall that 00:46:13.440 --> 00:46:16.659 is cement block type wall, a rock wall. All of 00:46:16.659 --> 00:46:19.800 a sudden, they're launching rocks at it. They're 00:46:19.800 --> 00:46:22.059 launching and launching and launching. And now 00:46:22.059 --> 00:46:23.900 it's starting to crumble and starting to break 00:46:23.900 --> 00:46:25.900 open. And all of a sudden, now it gets down low 00:46:25.900 --> 00:46:29.119 enough. And we'll look at that. Here's this opening 00:46:29.119 --> 00:46:32.460 in the wall. We can get through that opening. 00:46:33.000 --> 00:46:36.239 It's been breached. And so now the enemy is going 00:46:36.239 --> 00:46:38.719 to concentrate its forces with its fullest intensity 00:46:38.719 --> 00:46:41.840 on that spot. However, for the enemies to enter 00:46:41.840 --> 00:46:46.199 through the city, if that ends up happening, 00:46:46.400 --> 00:46:49.639 well, now you have, let's call it the vulnerable 00:46:49.639 --> 00:46:53.300 underbelly, the exposed underbelly. Now you're 00:46:53.300 --> 00:46:56.659 done. You're done. If the enemy soldiers can 00:46:56.659 --> 00:46:59.820 get into the city, now how are you going to stop 00:46:59.820 --> 00:47:03.260 them? You need to keep them out. So there's a 00:47:03.260 --> 00:47:06.590 ton at stake. And so the armies defending the 00:47:06.590 --> 00:47:10.150 city, they would have to send soldiers into the 00:47:10.150 --> 00:47:13.909 opening in the wall, into the breach. And they 00:47:13.909 --> 00:47:17.849 were called upon to stand in the gap in the wall. 00:47:18.809 --> 00:47:23.130 That was the point where the battle and the attack 00:47:23.130 --> 00:47:26.130 was going to be the most fierce and the most 00:47:26.130 --> 00:47:31.630 dangerous. And it's that image that God utilizes 00:47:31.630 --> 00:47:36.469 to depict the role. of the intercessor in scripture. 00:47:36.789 --> 00:47:40.309 God could have used all kinds of, you know, images 00:47:40.309 --> 00:47:44.590 or metaphors for an intercessor. An intercessor 00:47:44.590 --> 00:47:47.449 is an angel going back and forth. No, an intercessor 00:47:47.449 --> 00:47:50.949 is someone standing in the gap. And you can see 00:47:50.949 --> 00:47:55.170 it, Ezekiel 22. Thus I have searched among them 00:47:55.170 --> 00:48:00.550 for someone who could build a wall or stand in 00:48:00.550 --> 00:48:05.110 the breach before me. To keep me from destroying 00:48:05.110 --> 00:48:10.429 the land. But I found no one. Therefore, I have 00:48:10.429 --> 00:48:14.949 poured out my fury upon them. With my fiery wrath, 00:48:15.210 --> 00:48:19.250 I have consumed them. I have brought down their 00:48:19.250 --> 00:48:23.750 conduct upon their heads, says the Lord. So the 00:48:23.750 --> 00:48:26.789 Lord is searching among them for someone who 00:48:26.789 --> 00:48:30.789 would stand in the breach. And you see this, 00:48:30.809 --> 00:48:32.570 you can stop and think about it. You know the 00:48:32.570 --> 00:48:34.650 stories in the Old Testament where that happens. 00:48:34.750 --> 00:48:38.250 You have Abraham, right? He intercedes for Sodom 00:48:38.250 --> 00:48:42.230 in Genesis 18, right? If there are 50 among them, 00:48:42.309 --> 00:48:44.929 if there are 45, if there are 40, if there are 00:48:44.929 --> 00:48:47.750 30, right? He keeps saying, will you still destroy 00:48:47.750 --> 00:48:50.030 it? Will you still destroy it? He is standing 00:48:50.030 --> 00:48:54.730 in the gap. He is standing in the gap for the 00:48:54.730 --> 00:48:58.789 people of Sodom. Or Moses, how many times is 00:48:58.789 --> 00:49:03.250 Moses interceding and saying? At least three 00:49:03.250 --> 00:49:06.210 times, right? They make the golden calf and Moses 00:49:06.210 --> 00:49:08.809 intercedes in Exodus 32. Don't destroy them. 00:49:09.329 --> 00:49:13.690 Don't destroy them. In Numbers 14, he intercedes 00:49:13.690 --> 00:49:15.409 for the Israelites when they refuse to enter 00:49:15.409 --> 00:49:17.909 the land, the promised land. In Deuteronomy 9, 00:49:18.130 --> 00:49:21.690 7, he recalls interceding before God for the 00:49:21.690 --> 00:49:24.250 Israelites. So you have Moses basically saying, 00:49:24.309 --> 00:49:28.449 look, Lord. don't destroy them. Like, kill me 00:49:28.449 --> 00:49:31.769 instead. Take me, but don't destroy them. Like, 00:49:31.769 --> 00:49:33.550 Lord, hey, what's going to happen to your reputation 00:49:33.550 --> 00:49:35.369 if you destroy them? Like, you led them out here 00:49:35.369 --> 00:49:40.030 to destroy them. He is, what is he doing? And 00:49:40.030 --> 00:49:43.670 this is the amazing thing, is that the Lord is 00:49:43.670 --> 00:49:45.070 raising us up and we're going to stand in the 00:49:45.070 --> 00:49:48.610 gap. Now, I want you to hear that little detail. 00:49:50.920 --> 00:49:53.679 I would stand in the breach before me to keep 00:49:53.679 --> 00:49:57.860 me from destroying the land. So one who stands 00:49:57.860 --> 00:50:02.239 in the gap is appointed by God to, quote unquote, 00:50:02.639 --> 00:50:09.019 oppose God. To oppose God, to withstand God. 00:50:09.900 --> 00:50:14.800 At that point where God is experienced as the 00:50:14.800 --> 00:50:20.679 enemy, as the attacker. This is a fascinating, 00:50:20.900 --> 00:50:24.780 mysterious point to think about. It's this mystery 00:50:24.780 --> 00:50:28.639 of our free cooperation in God's saving plan 00:50:28.639 --> 00:50:30.840 for the world, that God does not desire destruction, 00:50:31.039 --> 00:50:35.280 but quote -unquote needs or wills that there 00:50:35.280 --> 00:50:39.440 be intercessors who stand up in place of, for 00:50:39.440 --> 00:50:43.099 the sake of, and on behalf of those who have 00:50:43.099 --> 00:50:46.030 sinned. Did you hear what I just said? on behalf 00:50:46.030 --> 00:50:47.409 of those who have failed, on behalf of those 00:50:47.409 --> 00:50:49.369 who have betrayed, on behalf of those who have 00:50:49.369 --> 00:50:53.590 failed to honor God, to prevent this destruction 00:50:53.590 --> 00:50:57.269 from occurring. And so here's the mysterious 00:50:57.269 --> 00:51:00.769 sense of communion. You'd imagine someone who 00:51:00.769 --> 00:51:03.090 says, Lord, pick me. I'm willing to stand in 00:51:03.090 --> 00:51:05.349 the gap. You're like, Lord, I'm in union with 00:51:05.349 --> 00:51:08.869 you. I'm in union with you, Lord. I got you. 00:51:09.550 --> 00:51:11.650 I know that those people have done horrible things. 00:51:11.849 --> 00:51:14.389 I'm with you. Let me take on the role of the 00:51:14.389 --> 00:51:17.000 intercessor. But the one who stands in the gap 00:51:17.000 --> 00:51:21.980 is standing in solidarity with the people at 00:51:21.980 --> 00:51:25.880 their point of sinfulness rather than with God 00:51:25.880 --> 00:51:29.980 at the point of his righteousness. Did you hear 00:51:29.980 --> 00:51:33.760 that? If you're an intercessor, you're coming 00:51:33.760 --> 00:51:37.900 before God and you're not saying, Lord, I know 00:51:37.900 --> 00:51:40.820 you and I are on the same page. I'm kind of holy 00:51:40.820 --> 00:51:43.559 like you and I'm kind of approaching sinlessness. 00:51:43.860 --> 00:51:46.960 So I can kind of hang out here in the heavenly 00:51:46.960 --> 00:51:51.219 realm and feel like I've got divine light kind 00:51:51.219 --> 00:51:53.519 of in my life. But Lord, I'm looking at these 00:51:53.519 --> 00:51:56.400 really horrific sinners down there and they need 00:51:56.400 --> 00:51:59.340 help. And so Lord, I'm taking up that role of 00:51:59.340 --> 00:52:02.719 intercessor and I'm with you. So Lord, help them 00:52:02.719 --> 00:52:06.599 out. I know that you want to use me to be a conduit 00:52:06.599 --> 00:52:11.780 of graces because, you know, I'm... I don't have 00:52:11.780 --> 00:52:14.260 many sins going on, and I can be a good holy 00:52:14.260 --> 00:52:19.500 conduit. No, it's not it. It's, Lord, free us 00:52:19.500 --> 00:52:22.500 from our brokenness, from our lostness, from 00:52:22.500 --> 00:52:25.679 our sin. Lord, we have fallen short. We have 00:52:25.679 --> 00:52:30.960 betrayed you. We have let you down, oh God. So 00:52:30.960 --> 00:52:34.000 if you get it, do you see it? We're standing 00:52:34.000 --> 00:52:39.550 with God at that point. at the point of the brokenness 00:52:39.550 --> 00:52:43.409 of those people. And this is connected to the 00:52:43.409 --> 00:52:46.690 meaning of intercession and its connection to 00:52:46.690 --> 00:52:49.929 the cross of Jesus. This is in the Catechism 00:52:49.929 --> 00:52:53.670 of the Catholic Church, paragraph 2741. Jesus 00:52:53.670 --> 00:52:58.670 also prays for us, guess what, in our place and 00:52:58.670 --> 00:53:02.690 on our behalf. And it says, all our petitions 00:53:02.690 --> 00:53:07.239 were gathered up once for all. in his cry on 00:53:07.239 --> 00:53:12.539 the cross and in his resurrection heard by the 00:53:12.539 --> 00:53:17.539 father. That's powerful. Jesus intercedes for 00:53:17.539 --> 00:53:19.719 us. And where is it? It's in his cry on the cross. 00:53:21.039 --> 00:53:24.960 And that idea of taking up one's place at the 00:53:24.960 --> 00:53:27.480 point of encounter between sinful humanity and 00:53:27.480 --> 00:53:29.579 the suffering love of God, which is the cross. 00:53:30.000 --> 00:53:32.900 By the way, that's the Carmelite vocation is 00:53:32.900 --> 00:53:36.019 taking up that place. at that point of encounter 00:53:36.019 --> 00:53:38.619 between sinful humanity and the suffering love 00:53:38.619 --> 00:53:41.500 of God, the cross. You want to be an intercessor? 00:53:41.719 --> 00:53:44.619 You're asking to enter into the crucifixion of 00:53:44.619 --> 00:53:47.780 Jesus. Do it anyways. The Lord is calling you 00:53:47.780 --> 00:53:50.639 and me to intercede, especially for those we 00:53:50.639 --> 00:53:54.139 love and for those whose lives we impact. Yes, 00:53:54.219 --> 00:53:57.699 even in the workplace. And you will become a 00:53:57.699 --> 00:54:01.420 more radiant witness as a result.