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Hello everybody and welcome to the Awaken Together podcast.

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I'm Kat and today I am joined by a very special guest.

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I want to introduce you all to my friend Ash Mills of Ritual Healing.

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Ash is an intuitive tattoo artist, certified yoga teacher, and really advocate for sharing

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your story and promoting vulnerability.

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So welcome to the show Ash.

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Thank you so much.

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I'm so happy to be here.

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Of course.

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Thank you so much for being here.

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I'm just so excited for our community to hear all about your work and your gifts.

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I personally have friends who've experienced your work and they just have nothing but amazing

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glowing things to say.

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I'm blushing.

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You are.

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I love it.

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Yeah, but I wanted to see if we can start by just hearing a little bit more about your

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work so our listeners can get a sense for what that magic is.

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Yeah.

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So to put it very simply is I give space for a person to talk about themselves and their

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life story.

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And during that time I draw out a set of symbols that are universal and archetypal while they're

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talking and develop a symbol that kind of represents that journey.

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And if the person is completely in love with the story, I actually go about tattooing it

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on them.

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And the tattooing portion is also very intentional and leans towards being a little medicinal

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as well.

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Yeah.

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And we will link Ash's link to this podcast so you can get a feel and just a visual for

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what her pieces look like.

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How would you describe your artwork if you had like a couple words?

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Yeah.

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So I think that it's really interesting because it doesn't derive from any particular culture.

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I've heard a little bit Nordic.

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But I think the most interesting part is that no matter which part of the world you're on,

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because I've done these sessions online with a couple of people in a couple of different

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countries, that doesn't really matter what language you speak or religion you grew up

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in that the symbols themselves are like they resonate in the same way.

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And my favorite example is that when you see a rounded line facing upwards, it has a very

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soft feminine held nurturing feeling opposed to a triangle facing upwards.

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So that has a little more structured masculine upward movement feeling to it.

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You can see that.

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Yeah.

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So cool.

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So cool.

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I think what's really special that I mean, one of the many things that sets you apart

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from more different tattoos that I think many people kind of think of is your space and

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how it's really one and one.

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It's not in like a big tattoo salon with other people where you can kind of pick up on others'

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energy and just a lot of external stimuli.

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But we actually met through Nurture and you have this beautiful suite where I've seen

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you can tattoo people lying down on the ground just with their legs up the wall.

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I think that's so neat and really helps with the nervous system.

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Yeah.

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So that is, I think, really important when it comes to actually getting tattooed, really

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activating that parasympathetic nervous system.

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So getting out of fight or flight, I know that I've been in a couple tattoo shops where

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I felt incredibly uncomfortable and it was cold and it was like the heavy metal music

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was playing and my body was just in like fight or flight.

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And I also kind of felt like the people didn't want me to want me to be there.

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And I'm a very sensitive person, obviously.

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So when your body is in fight or flight and it's getting tattooed, it's already kind

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of irritated and doesn't want to be there.

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However, if you're with a person that you feel really safe with, there's like plants

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and light and like either music that you chose or like calm music, your nervous system is

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like, OK, I can tolerate and handle this pain.

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It's like I've had so many clients are like, that was the most relaxing tattoo that I've

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ever gotten.

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I think that's so special.

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I have one tattoo.

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I recently shared how I actually have two tattoos, but one's a cover up.

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And I'm somebody who has like vasovagal syncope.

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I've done EMDR for it.

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But whenever I get shots or needlework done, I faint.

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And so I just had such imposter syndrome when I got my tattoo done.

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It was many years ago now where it was one of the spaces like heavy metal playing like

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you shared about.

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And I can just only imagine how much more of a beautiful, grounding, meaningful, intentional

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experience it would be with you holding the space.

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So, oh, it's amazing.

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Thank you.

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Of course.

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And I would love to hear a little bit more about kind of a journey in your life that

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has gotten you to this work, because I think not many people find themselves as intuitive

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tattoo artists.

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So if you wouldn't mind sharing.

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Of course.

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So I've always been like that artsy kid, for sure.

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I've always also been incredibly sensitive and creative.

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And also had a pretty chaotic childhood that added to that hypervigilance of really picking

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up on other people's emotions and how they feel and kind of where they're at.

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So I guess that's a positive thing some trauma has given me being able to use that

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within my work.

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But also experiencing so many different types of things.

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I think that there's a lot of people that I can talk to where it's I can actually hold

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space for that because I understand it.

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And I always use this example of just like if there's an alcoholic and a person that's

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just like, you should stop drinking the alcohol that would go well, you can go screw yourself.

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Yeah, right.

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But if it's an alcoholic talking to another alcoholic of being like, hey, I get you, I

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see you.

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It's really hard.

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Life can get better.

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The person who is drinking is like, oh, I can actually be seen and held.

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So there's a positive that has came to like all of the chaos.

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And as for the tattooing portion, I've kind of stayed out of tattoo shops because of that

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sensitivity and tried to get an apprenticeship, but the vibes were all off.

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And it's just like, I also have a history of addiction.

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So I like knew that I couldn't be in those spaces.

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And so the tattooing, I was working at a yoga studio.

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I had this very beautiful mentor that saw my artwork and she asked me why I wasn't

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tattooing yet.

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And I told her the reasons why I just told you.

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And so she bought me the equipment and trust of that's what I'm supposed to be doing

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with my life and like giving her tattoos later on.

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And the intuitive process actually came within the first, I think, 10 tattoos that I ever

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did.

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That's incredible.

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So it was kind of everything like fell into place very easily.

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I feel very fortunate for that.

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But it has been about 10 years of journey work to actually be able to like hold the

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space and be doing what I'm doing.

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I think that's so cool that you had a mentor like that put on your path, kind of nudge

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you in reflection.

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Yeah.

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And she's a beautiful badass woman.

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So it definitely like lit a fire of like, oh, she believes in me.

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I have to do this.

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I have to figure this out.

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Oh, that's beautiful.

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Do you want to give her a shout out?

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Katie Rowe.

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I love Katie Rowe.

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Do you know Katie Rowe?

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Yeah, she was one of my teachers on my 300 hour at the river.

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Yes.

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Yeah, she's an angel.

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But definitely a huge part of my journey.

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So thank you.

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Thank you, Katie.

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Amazing.

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And so I think a lot of our listeners will resonate with that of like, just having a

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more tumultuous childhood and upbringing to kind of land in this place of being hypersensitive,

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attuned to people's energies, a little bit of that, just leaning on intuition for a lot

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of what we do.

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And so I think what we're really looking to dig into today is the importance of sharing

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your story.

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Of course, this is something that you hold space for really often.

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But can you share in a nutshell, like, why is this so important for us to be empowered

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to do?

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I think that one, there's not that many spaces in this world to actually sit and tell your

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entire story.

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I think that we go to therapy and can talk about our problems.

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I think that we can go on dates and share things with friends.

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But I don't know of many spaces of where you can sit and vulnerably and authentically

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show yourself and everything that you've been through in a space where it can be held

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and listened to.

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And that's the thing about vulnerability that's fascinating is that I think that when

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you show who you truly are, and then there's a person receiving it on the other side that

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isn't shocked or appalled or is this like making this like, oh my God, well, why did

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you do that?

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Or having all these solutions for you when it can truly just be held and you realize

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that like, oh, who I am is okay.

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The things that I have been through have shaped me into the person who I am.

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Not to mention there's so many times when a person tells their story and there's a red

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thread on like, oh, it seems like you do that that often or oh, your mom also did that.

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And they're like, oh, I've never noticed that.

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So there's these things that come up that you've never really recognized when it comes

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to just trends and things that have happened.

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Not to mention when someone can sit and hear your story and then they look at you and then

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they just say that that makes a lot of sense or that must be really hard.

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Yeah, you just the health like scene you are right and being seen and heard, I think is

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just a really important thing to the psyche.

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I think it's such a key to our human experience that so many of us often don't receive until

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we are in spaces that feel just safe.

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Right.

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And we are in a society that we just get caught comparing ourselves so often.

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Social media is so hard for so many of us.

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And we just assume that everybody has it easier than we do.

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Right.

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We really do.

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And the wild thing about the position that I'm in is that you really cannot look at a

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person and know what they've been through.

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Right.

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There's some times where I was just like, I had no idea that was coming and how they

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present themselves on a day to day basis and then their story.

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I'm just like, and that's another thing that I'm always surprised about is the resilience

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of people where it's just like the I mean, some terrible things happen, some really,

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really bad things.

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And I'm like, how I won't say I want to say, say that, say this, but it's just like, how

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are you still sitting here?

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Yeah.

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How are you still here?

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You are amazing.

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Right.

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And I think that also unlocks things within us.

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Right.

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And I'm like, well, if they can do this and they have been through so much, like that

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thing was so hard and here they are still showing up like that to me is it means so

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much.

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It's just like it gives me just a little bit more self assurance that like whatever I have

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going on is going to be OK, too, knowing that somebody else has gone through maybe something

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similar and is OK.

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Yeah.

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And that's almost every time I come out of the sessions or something that I've learned

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either about myself, something that I've connected to or just being in the space of just like

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this is how they reacted and how helpful it was.

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It's really amazing when you do share like that connection that happens, even with podcasts

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of just like when you hear someone sharing authentically and they're just like, oh, I'm

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struggling, too.

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Mm hmm.

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It's just like, but they seem like they're doing so well on social media.

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It's like, oh, when you share authentically, there's so much more connection.

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Right.

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Exactly.

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And I think sometimes we have to seek these spaces out.

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Right.

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Like you are such a safe space for this.

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This is your work.

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This is your mission.

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And I feel like a big part of your purpose, like why you're here.

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You do it so beautifully.

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And I think it can be hard for people who don't find themselves in a line community

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but want it so bad to to resonate or not to resonate, but to feel safe, to open up.

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Right.

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So I'm wondering if you have any tips or recommendations for someone who might be in that boat who

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feels like they're maybe ready to share their story and be vulnerable, but they don't know

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like a safe place that exists right now to them.

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Yeah, I would say first things first is trusting yourself.

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Because I have mentioned even coming on this podcast, I was like, oh my God, what am I

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going to talk about?

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Like, how am I going to say this?

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And then this like, hey, this trust came in of just like, you'll know what to talk about.

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You're going to be OK.

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So this idea that one, you don't have to have everything perfect.

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That's definitely not how sharing your story works.

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But also the fact that like it's it's going to feel so much lighter once you do start

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telling your story.

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It does get easier after it takes some time and you really do have to find the right places.

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You can't like go to a bar and be like, this is my story.

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And before like, why are you sharing this here?

242
00:14:03,340 --> 00:14:09,460
So also, obviously, finding the right places and using using your your gut to like recognize

243
00:14:09,460 --> 00:14:14,560
the spaces that it should be told in, because some places just can't receive it properly.

244
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:16,660
Yeah, I love that.

245
00:14:16,660 --> 00:14:22,640
And what are some things that you think people should look out for to know that they feel

246
00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:26,000
safe, to know that this is a space that they can share?

247
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:28,760
That's a great question.

248
00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:34,080
Yeah, I feel like for me, it's like my body knows the answer.

249
00:14:34,080 --> 00:14:40,160
I was going to say that's the probably the first thing to go to is really checking in

250
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:42,280
with yourself.

251
00:14:42,280 --> 00:14:47,360
If there is a feeling in your gut that you shouldn't be there, that that feeling is usually

252
00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:48,360
pretty valid.

253
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:51,920
Yeah, like you can feel it, like even relating to the chakras.

254
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:54,200
Yeah, that's solar plexus, my belly.

255
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:56,320
Yeah, a little butterfly.

256
00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:57,320
Yeah.

257
00:14:57,320 --> 00:14:59,240
And I think some of that might be normal, right?

258
00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:01,600
The butterflies, especially the first few times.

259
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:09,520
But if it's like a sign, yeah, there's definitely because there's fears and then it's scary

260
00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:11,460
to do things like tell your story.

261
00:15:11,460 --> 00:15:15,320
And then there's mine almost comes from like my solar plexus area.

262
00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:20,680
It's just like there's something wrong.

263
00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:21,680
I think you are sure.

264
00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:25,320
Because I resonate with that.

265
00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:26,320
Yeah.

266
00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:27,320
Yeah.

267
00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,800
I mean, anxiety can feel like many different things.

268
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:34,200
And I think there's a difference in anxiety when something's a little stretchy and new

269
00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:36,960
than when it's just like not safe and wrong.

270
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:37,960
Right.

271
00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:38,960
Right.

272
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:39,960
Yes.

273
00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:40,960
Yeah.

274
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:44,920
I'm a part of a women's circle that I think I've maybe mentioned on the podcast here once

275
00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:45,920
or twice.

276
00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:53,280
And I've been we've had it for almost almost two years now, which is crazy.

277
00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:56,200
In August, it'll be two years.

278
00:15:56,200 --> 00:16:03,000
And it is insanely helpful for me because it's one of those spaces that I can feel like

279
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:08,160
I just show up and don't have to think about anything going into it, but have that kind

280
00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:15,000
of in my mind that every month I'll meet with the same women and we will talk about what's

281
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,600
going on in our lives.

282
00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:21,600
And it's funny, whenever a new person joins, there's tears.

283
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:27,360
And I think that's because it's the first time that they're in a safe space and maybe

284
00:16:27,360 --> 00:16:29,040
a long time.

285
00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:35,320
And so there's just so much held down that maybe that first time is just like a volcano

286
00:16:35,320 --> 00:16:40,680
coming up with your words that you don't even realize how much truth and emotion that you've

287
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:46,040
been not even paying attention to that's been weighing heavy.

288
00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:50,160
And that's another thing is that just this world doesn't provide too many spaces.

289
00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:55,500
I'm just thinking about all of the basic life things of going to school and going to college

290
00:16:55,500 --> 00:16:56,500
and going to work.

291
00:16:56,500 --> 00:16:58,120
It's like, well, where is that?

292
00:16:58,120 --> 00:16:59,760
Where are the safe places?

293
00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:05,800
And I think that there used to be a lot of like community and like structures like that

294
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:07,520
that we don't really have anymore.

295
00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:08,560
Right.

296
00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:11,840
So that's beautiful when someone can find a space like that.

297
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:12,840
Yeah.

298
00:17:12,840 --> 00:17:17,120
And you're just like, and you're just like, oh my gosh, I can show up fully exactly who

299
00:17:17,120 --> 00:17:18,400
I am.

300
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:22,220
And then there's a people all in the room and they're just like, you're welcome to be

301
00:17:22,220 --> 00:17:25,760
here exactly who you are and how you are at all.

302
00:17:25,760 --> 00:17:28,000
And it just it feels amazing.

303
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:29,840
There's nothing in the world like that feeling.

304
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:31,640
I can feel it right now.

305
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:41,760
Even like last night, that last night we had women's circle and one of my friends who she

306
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:44,160
she just moved here like six months ago and I invited her.

307
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:45,160
It was her first circle.

308
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:47,380
Like I mentioned, there were tears.

309
00:17:47,380 --> 00:17:50,480
She wasn't expecting tears she shared after.

310
00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:56,720
But she's recently married and they still haven't talked about finances and what they

311
00:17:56,720 --> 00:17:58,360
want that to look like.

312
00:17:58,360 --> 00:18:03,600
And so I think like five of us in the group are married and the rest are just in different

313
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:06,560
points, whether relationships, single, all that.

314
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:13,680
And she's like, I didn't even know how much I needed to hear from other people in relationships,

315
00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:16,120
how to treat finances.

316
00:18:16,120 --> 00:18:20,240
And she's like, I know at the end of the day, it will come from me and us, but it's just

317
00:18:20,240 --> 00:18:27,460
so helpful hearing authentically about these topics that aren't OK to talk about in normal

318
00:18:27,460 --> 00:18:29,280
everyday life with people.

319
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:30,280
Yeah.

320
00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:33,640
And that just makes me think about like the olden times where everyone would use to sit

321
00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:38,440
around a fire and share about their stories as well as like what they're going through.

322
00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:39,440
Yes.

323
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:43,040
There's just such like a deep internal need for something like that.

324
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:47,900
There's like humans are storytellers and it's just like even the difficult parts of things

325
00:18:47,900 --> 00:18:53,720
that you're not necessarily supposed to share, where there's just like spaces where that's

326
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:54,720
completely welcome.

327
00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:58,000
I yes, so agree.

328
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:03,600
We need to bring back that more, more frequently, more regularly, I think.

329
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:05,240
And I think we're seeing it now.

330
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:08,320
I think so, too, especially in spaces like Denver.

331
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:09,320
Yeah.

332
00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:10,320
We're lucky.

333
00:19:10,320 --> 00:19:11,320
Yeah.

334
00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:12,320
Yeah.

335
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:17,920
So one thing kind of came to mind, and I think it's a fear that I've heard some people share,

336
00:19:17,920 --> 00:19:24,940
whether it's I'm talking to them about Women's Circle or in yoga or, you know, even at work

337
00:19:24,940 --> 00:19:34,080
sometimes of this fear of oversharing, right, oversharing fears or vulnerabilities, even

338
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:36,820
in safe spaces.

339
00:19:36,820 --> 00:19:37,960
That's the difference.

340
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:40,920
There's an oversharing at the grocery store line.

341
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:41,920
Yeah.

342
00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:42,920
Right.

343
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:43,920
Right.

344
00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:47,240
But even in safe spaces, that's really interesting because it's almost like they're being too

345
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:48,240
much.

346
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:49,240
Yeah.

347
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:54,040
And I don't think I don't know, man, when I'm in when I'm receiving and I'm holding

348
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:58,880
spaces, I'm like, if there's something there, like, lay it on the table because this is

349
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:00,560
like don't hide anything.

350
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:01,560
Yeah.

351
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:03,800
Because if that's who you truly are.

352
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:09,720
And I think that especially as women, like we're told that we overreact because we have

353
00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:12,280
these big feelings and we have these big emotions.

354
00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:19,160
And it's supposed to be a to be more in like the masculine sense and like this is no, this

355
00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:20,440
is how things make sense.

356
00:20:20,440 --> 00:20:25,400
And it's just like, no, you're allowed to feel a lot.

357
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:31,880
And again, you have to find the right space for that to be held.

358
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:37,540
And you have to make sure that it is a space where it can be held.

359
00:20:37,540 --> 00:20:43,240
But if it's a safe space, I would recommend just just putting it out there.

360
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:44,240
Going all in.

361
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:45,240
Yeah.

362
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:46,240
Yeah.

363
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:47,240
And I get it too.

364
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:49,240
I'm not a sharer.

365
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,840
Oddly enough, like I receive stories very well.

366
00:20:51,840 --> 00:20:55,000
And something that I'm working in therapy right now is that when I'm actually sharing

367
00:20:55,000 --> 00:21:00,400
my emotions, there's something that like blocks up that it just like, no, like I'm not the

368
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:02,200
one that shares.

369
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:05,440
So it's just like there's certain levels to all of it.

370
00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:09,680
Yeah, that that reciprocity can be tricky to find the balance between.

371
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:13,880
Yeah, I like to tell people that too, of like, I'm a great listener.

372
00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:15,480
At least I like to think so.

373
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:16,480
Right.

374
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:19,980
But sometimes it kind of depends on the mood I'm in too.

375
00:21:19,980 --> 00:21:22,920
Sometimes I'll be with a friend and I'll be like, how about you?

376
00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:24,320
I feel like you haven't shared much.

377
00:21:24,320 --> 00:21:25,320
What's going on?

378
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:28,040
It's like, you know, thank you for noticing that.

379
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:31,200
But sometimes I just feel like listening and being there for you.

380
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,000
Yeah, that's okay.

381
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,000
Yeah.

382
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,000
Yeah.

383
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:38,000
And as long as that communication is there and it's not like you're being completely

384
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:41,440
drained and you're like, don't worry, I'm here.

385
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:46,120
I love when people are just like recognizing that, like I'm speaking a lot.

386
00:21:46,120 --> 00:21:52,080
And also with the thing about showing up a little too much is also I really love asking,

387
00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:54,720
like, do you have space to hold this for me right now?

388
00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:55,720
Yes.

389
00:21:55,720 --> 00:22:01,120
So so you can get it right off the bat of like, is this a space where I can share?

390
00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:05,080
And the person has the absolute ability to be like, I've got a lot of things on my mind.

391
00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:07,000
This is not something I can handle right now.

392
00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:08,880
Or they can be like, fuck you, I laid on me.

393
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:09,880
Yes, exactly.

394
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:13,720
So asking like, hey, do you have I'm feeling a lot.

395
00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:15,560
Do you have space for this?

396
00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:17,560
I love that so much.

397
00:22:17,560 --> 00:22:21,060
Something that Kyle, my husband and I have gotten in the habit of doing more and more

398
00:22:21,060 --> 00:22:27,440
regularly with each other of like, do you have space right now to listen to something?

399
00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:31,360
And oftentimes it's something that has to do with the other person.

400
00:22:31,360 --> 00:22:35,200
Yeah, I guess I am.

401
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:36,200
Okay.

402
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:40,080
They're like, yes, or like, I'm sorry, I don't right now.

403
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:44,880
Yeah, and something that we started using more and more in our vocabulary is like, are

404
00:22:44,880 --> 00:22:46,440
you feeling regulated right now?

405
00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:47,440
What a great couple.

406
00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:48,440
That sounds amazing.

407
00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:53,800
This is years and years of therapy on both ends and together.

408
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:57,320
So that sounds like years and years of therapy.

409
00:22:57,320 --> 00:22:59,040
What's your feelings wheel right now?

410
00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:00,880
Can you point to it?

411
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:02,480
Go over to the fridge.

412
00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:06,880
We should print it out and put on the fridge, right?

413
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:07,880
Yes.

414
00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:15,080
So I mean, in everyday conversations, maybe less, but if you're with people that you know

415
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:20,640
and trust, maybe you establish that kind of vocabulary and common language to just kind

416
00:23:20,640 --> 00:23:23,840
of help take the burden off and level the field.

417
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:24,840
So easy too.

418
00:23:24,840 --> 00:23:25,840
Yeah.

419
00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:26,840
Do you have space for this?

420
00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:27,840
Yes.

421
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:33,000
And do you want feedback?

422
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:34,440
Do you just want me to listen?

423
00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:35,440
Yeah.

424
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:36,440
I find it so helpful.

425
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:37,440
So helpful.

426
00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:39,280
There's friends who we know them.

427
00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:43,320
They have the best intentions, but it's always like, oh, have you tried this?

428
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:45,320
Or like the helpers, the fixers?

429
00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:47,880
Some type of vitamin or something like that.

430
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:49,920
And like I've been that person.

431
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:53,040
So I know something I'm always working on.

432
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:54,040
Yeah.

433
00:23:54,040 --> 00:24:01,200
And the helpers, type twos on the end of your gram is, it's tough, but it's so worth it

434
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,240
just to ask that extra little question.

435
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:04,240
Absolutely.

436
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:12,120
So in all of the stories that you've listened to, all the spaces that you've held, I'm curious

437
00:24:12,120 --> 00:24:17,480
if you've noticed some common threads that you could share with us through that.

438
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:18,480
Yeah.

439
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:25,120
So this is something that I've recognized when I first started out was the, particularly

440
00:24:25,120 --> 00:24:31,480
like the mother figure within childhood, which can also mean the grandma or that type of

441
00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:38,840
support, oftentimes becomes what a person's inner monologue sounds like.

442
00:24:38,840 --> 00:24:47,960
So say a person has a very soft, nurturing, just supportive kind of like an understanding

443
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:48,960
mother.

444
00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:53,520
I, when I talk to them, they're like, yeah, that was really hard, but I'm okay.

445
00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:59,680
Opposed to if they had a very critical, kind of emotionally absent, maybe physically their

446
00:24:59,680 --> 00:25:06,800
mom, then their inner monologue is, it sounds the same.

447
00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:10,560
And so it's really fascinating, like seeing, hearing so many different, and I'm sure there's

448
00:25:10,560 --> 00:25:16,400
like books or something like this on that subject, but it's just like, it's fascinating

449
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:21,680
to see the way a person describes their mom and then the way that they act towards themselves.

450
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:22,680
Yeah.

451
00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:23,800
I can so see that.

452
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:29,600
I think, are you familiar with IFS therapy, internal family systems?

453
00:25:29,600 --> 00:25:30,600
That's okay.

454
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:35,080
So it's this idea that within us, there's a whole network of different parts.

455
00:25:35,080 --> 00:25:39,880
So I think we all kind of as a society know this intuitively.

456
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:43,800
It's like, there's a part of me that feels this, right?

457
00:25:43,800 --> 00:25:46,840
And so it's that whole principle, that whole concept.

458
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:53,400
And it sounds to me like our mothers or any female figures kind of get ingrained as a

459
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:54,400
part of us.

460
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:55,400
Right?

461
00:25:55,400 --> 00:26:01,600
And so we have like the younger parts of us, the higher parts of us, the protector parts,

462
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:02,600
the defenses.

463
00:26:02,600 --> 00:26:04,200
And so you're talking about like archetypes.

464
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:05,200
Yeah, pretty much.

465
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:06,200
Yes, exactly.

466
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:09,200
But it's kind of like a different language.

467
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:10,200
Yeah.

468
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:11,200
Yeah.

469
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:17,640
So it's wild to hear that, and I think it just makes so much sense how as women, we

470
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:22,000
learn how to be women from other women in our lives.

471
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:23,000
Right?

472
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:28,600
And especially, I mean, you're learning your environment and what is okay and what's not

473
00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:29,600
okay.

474
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:32,800
So if you look at mom and you're just like, this is how I'm supposed to act.

475
00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:35,720
And the mom is really destructive or angry.

476
00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:38,360
And you're like, all right, this is how we're supposed to end it.

477
00:26:38,360 --> 00:26:43,920
And your brain is so malleable during those ages.

478
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:47,400
You're like, this is how we interact with the world in order to survive.

479
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:48,400
Yes.

480
00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:52,520
So it becomes, and then as you grow older, it turns into those neural pathways.

481
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:56,040
And fortunately, there's no neuroplasticity where you can change that.

482
00:26:56,040 --> 00:27:01,760
But it's just, it's fascinating how much it just kind of sticks with us when it's at a

483
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:03,040
really early age.

484
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:04,040
Yeah.

485
00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:09,440
And I think the one that's screaming out to me loudest right now is body image and food

486
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:11,440
and diet and how...

487
00:27:11,440 --> 00:27:12,440
Yeah.

488
00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:13,440
I was going to ask that.

489
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:14,440
How's that?

490
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:15,440
Oh man.

491
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:16,440
Yeah.

492
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:20,840
My mom still, whenever taking photos as a family, it's like, waist up, she'll say.

493
00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:22,840
I'm like, come on, mom.

494
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:24,560
Get my good angle.

495
00:27:24,560 --> 00:27:31,960
And just hearing little things like that growing up, it takes a toll on how we talk to ourselves.

496
00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:33,360
It absolutely does.

497
00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:36,240
And I think that the thing is that we don't even recognize that it's wrong.

498
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:37,240
Right.

499
00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:40,600
Until you start recognizing and learning from other people.

500
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:43,880
You're just like, oh, you don't hate yourself in every picture?

501
00:27:43,880 --> 00:27:46,080
I didn't even know that was another way.

502
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:47,080
Exactly.

503
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:48,080
I didn't realize that.

504
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:49,880
Like you can just look at a picture and enjoy it.

505
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:50,880
Yeah.

506
00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:51,880
And you know that was okay.

507
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:52,880
Yeah, exactly.

508
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:56,800
Like I thought people like that were full of themselves.

509
00:27:56,800 --> 00:27:57,800
Exactly.

510
00:27:57,800 --> 00:27:58,800
Oh my gosh.

511
00:27:58,800 --> 00:27:59,800
I hear that so much.

512
00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:00,800
Yeah.

513
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:05,160
And just like, for me, it's just like confidence was like a cocky bad thing.

514
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:06,160
Yeah.

515
00:28:06,160 --> 00:28:07,520
And you should be picking yourself apart.

516
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:08,520
Right.

517
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:09,520
Right.

518
00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:11,520
Which just feels so gross, like saying out loud.

519
00:28:11,520 --> 00:28:12,520
I know.

520
00:28:12,520 --> 00:28:14,920
Or like people who are really good at setting boundaries.

521
00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:16,960
It's true to those people.

522
00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:18,320
That's like, you shouldn't do that.

523
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:19,320
She's a bitch.

524
00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:20,320
Yeah, exactly.

525
00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:22,440
We see it in the workplace.

526
00:28:22,440 --> 00:28:28,440
We see it in how we care for others, putting others' needs ahead of our own.

527
00:28:28,440 --> 00:28:29,440
Man.

528
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:35,160
But I have so much hope for our generation.

529
00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:41,720
This came up last night of just like how we are doing a lot of work, right?

530
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:43,000
We are doing a lot of work.

531
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:46,120
We're in the age of Aquarius.

532
00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:50,240
As a collective, we're rising up and meeting these challenges.

533
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:55,040
I also think that is just like there's so much information available.

534
00:28:55,040 --> 00:28:56,040
Yes.

535
00:28:56,040 --> 00:29:02,360
And I can even feel it right now, just like connecting with another person and just being

536
00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:03,760
like, my mom was like that too.

537
00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:04,760
I'm like, oh, connection.

538
00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:06,320
Oh my gosh, connection.

539
00:29:06,320 --> 00:29:08,640
And connection is where there's growth.

540
00:29:08,640 --> 00:29:09,640
Yeah.

541
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,120
That's where growth happens.

542
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:14,200
You don't do things on your own.

543
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:18,760
And that's why I think that your story is really important to share, is that you can

544
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:24,560
write in your journal about your story, which does its own thing, or else you can actually

545
00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:26,400
connect with somebody.

546
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:29,400
And that's where so much of the growth happens.

547
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:30,400
Exactly.

548
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:33,680
It's like when we're connecting with somebody, I'm very clear, boy.

549
00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:36,000
And so I have these like pictures going in my mind right now.

550
00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:40,920
It's like when you even like reached out, touched my knee, like we're connecting.

551
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:45,600
I just got this visual of like two like ropes coming together.

552
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:47,280
Because you felt it too, right?

553
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:48,280
Yes.

554
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:49,280
When we talked about our moms.

555
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:50,280
Uh huh.

556
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:51,280
We're just like, uh huh.

557
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:52,280
That's where the connection is.

558
00:29:52,280 --> 00:29:53,280
Yes.

559
00:29:53,280 --> 00:29:58,520
You wrote that tie a knot and you're just stronger because of who you're connecting

560
00:29:58,520 --> 00:29:59,520
with.

561
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:00,520
Right.

562
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:04,600
And those connections just go deeper and deeper and deeper into our psyches.

563
00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:07,240
And we're just more powerful together.

564
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:08,240
Yeah.

565
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:11,400
And not to mention it's just like just having that little conversation with like another

566
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:12,400
human.

567
00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:17,560
I'm sure after I leave here, if there's some type of picture that I see of myself be like,

568
00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:20,120
oh yeah, other people do that too.

569
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:21,560
Or just like, that's funny.

570
00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:25,320
I shouldn't tear myself apart after I see every photo of mine.

571
00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:31,480
So that's like connection and just like getting that strength from another person.

572
00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:33,520
And then it falls into our daily lives.

573
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:34,520
Exactly.

574
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:40,280
We realized that like our way of doing things isn't the only way and how other ways might

575
00:30:40,280 --> 00:30:42,600
be even greater.

576
00:30:42,600 --> 00:30:49,000
Like if we can open our eyes and just stay open in our hearts, it's like, oh well, Ash

577
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:52,400
doesn't look at this photo and think badly of herself.

578
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:53,400
So I don't have to either.

579
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:54,400
Right.

580
00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:55,400
Exactly.

581
00:30:55,400 --> 00:30:56,400
Yeah.

582
00:30:56,400 --> 00:30:57,400
Oh, this is so special.

583
00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:58,400
I love it.

584
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:04,880
And that's, I mean, like I said, I had some nerves before this and now I'm just in this

585
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:08,160
like, I don't know this, I even had to explain it.

586
00:31:08,160 --> 00:31:12,720
Just very light feeling of enjoying talking to somebody.

587
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:13,720
You too.

588
00:31:13,720 --> 00:31:14,720
My heart is definitely feeling it.

589
00:31:14,720 --> 00:31:15,720
All the love filling up.

590
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:16,720
This is really nice.

591
00:31:16,720 --> 00:31:17,720
I wish you guys would be here.

592
00:31:17,720 --> 00:31:20,720
I know, I know.

593
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:23,520
I wish y'all could see this.

594
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:28,720
But I have a feeling that others listening to this are going to be feeling it in their

595
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:33,480
hearts as well and wanting to connect with you on deeper levels and just learn more about

596
00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:34,480
your work.

597
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:38,720
So how can our community connect with you?

598
00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:45,960
To the easiest ways I would say is Instagram, super easy handle, ritual.healing.

599
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:48,960
And then my website is ritual-healing.com.

600
00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:49,960
Awesome.

601
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:50,960
Yeah.

602
00:31:50,960 --> 00:31:51,960
Thank you so much.

603
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:52,960
I'm so, so nice to be here.

604
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:53,960
It's been wonderful to have you.

605
00:31:53,960 --> 00:32:04,200
And if any of you all have questions for Ash, you can pop it down on our Instagram or follow

606
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:06,200
her directly.

607
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:09,120
And we hope to see y'all next time.

608
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:10,120
Thank you.

609
00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:16,120
Bye.