This is being carried by multiple news outlets,
so I'm just gonna pick one and read it. This
one is coming to you from The Independent. Oh
yeah, I forgot to mention, with all the confusion,
I'm not giving you a choice of category this
week because I found this far too interesting.
This article from October 29, 2025. Okay, somewhat
topical for your fringy minis. Yeah. Pretty recent.
Coming to us from the independent in this instance,
it was the first one that I could open up and
it's titled by Rachel Dobkin and Greg. I've never
seen Greg spelled this way ever in my life. G
-R -A -I -G. Kind of like Craig. Yeah. Phonetically,
there's nothing wrong with it, but I hate it.
I really do hate it. I didn't even know that
was something I could hate. Grazziosi. Crews
continue to hunt for three aggressive research
monkeys who escaped truck crash on Mississippi
Highway. there didn't seem to be an update on
that. At one point I saw one that said one is
remaining so they probably killed two of them
unfortunately. But here we are reading this one.
I didn't see an update that they caught the last
one. Three aggressive monkeys are still on the
loose after a truck transporting them overturned
in Mississippi, officials confirmed. The truck
was loaded with caged rhesus monkeys when it
crashed on Interstate 59 North of Heidelberg
on Tuesday. It is still not clear what caused
the truck to overturn. Okay, fair enough. Yeah,
I just remembered three are missing. I assume
there were three in total. Fair enough for you
saying that. Maybe there were only three. We
have no clarification. There's somewhere between
three and three thousand. We got to assume. Yeah,
exactly. No less than three. Either three or
three thousand. That's my guess anyway. Certainly
not four. That would've been awkward if that
one didn't want to partake, so it just sat there,
didn't escape. It was driving the truck. The
truck was loaded with caged rusa's monkeys when
it crashed, despite reports initially suggesting
that the monkeys were carrying infectious disease.
Oh, I remember this. Including hepatitis C, herpes,
and COVID -19, Tulane University, where they
were being housed, denied the case. The primates
aren't infectious. Actually, it says the primates
dot dot dot aren't infectious. I wonder what
those dot dot dots are covering up. We're actively
collaborating. I bet it's, and don't quote me
on this. collaborating with local authorities
and will send a team of animal care experts to
assist as needed," the university wrote. Tulane
stressed to The Independent that the monkeys
have not been exposed to any infectious agent.
The monkeys, which the Associated Press says
are among the most medically studied in the world,
were being transported to a testing facility
in Florida, Connecticut, WFSB reported. Jasper
County Sheriff Randy Johnson told local outlet
WAPT that 21 monkeys were on the truck, six of
whom initially escaped. We were way off. Oh,
so they were able to thwart like half of them
right off the bat. Yeah, unless all of those
other ones died in the crash and the other ones
took off. Quote, the monkey that got away actually
crossed interstate, went out into a wooded area,
Johnson said. That was broken English. I wonder
if Johnson is a native English speaker. Initial
reports suggested. Only one monkey was still
on the loose, but after Jasper County officials
were able to reach the wreck safely, they discovered
two others had also fled from the wreck. The
driver of the truck told local law enforcement
that the monkeys were dangerous and posed a threat
to humans. The department wrote in a Facebook
post warning the public they were aggressive.
Tulane previously told The Independent that the
monkeys left the Tulane National Biomedical Research
Center in Covington, Louisiana and were traveling
to a non -Tulane -affiliated location. The primates
in question belonged to another entity, the university
said, adding that they were not being trans -
Transported by a Tulane affiliated service sounds
like Tulane wants nothing to do with these monkeys
I just gotta say like we're talking about an
accident and the name of the research facility
is Tulane like a road is just weird The monkeys
that escaped and were recovered have been destroyed,
according to officials. I hate it when they use
that word. Mississippi Wildlife and Fisheries
also responded to the scene. Tulane will send
a team to pick up the monkeys that are still
caged on Wednesday, according to authorities.
In the wake of the incident, PETA issued a statement
calling the incident an example of the risk posed
by the greedy monkey experimentation industry.
While it can be hard to manage age What? I think
I went to a different article. Anyhow, I think
that's the end of the article. This wasn't exactly
the article I was hoping for, and I'm left confused
a little bit as to if they weren't full of herpes
and COVID. Who would even want a racist monkey
then? Did the truck driver just make it up? Like,
where did this come from? Something tells me
that this truck driver had multiple accidents
in his past, and they told him like, you gotta
be really careful. These monkeys, they got herpes.
And like COVID and I don't know, what are you
scared of? Yep, they got that. They got a lot
of that. Just like incentivize them to drive.
You gotta be careful. Any wrong moves and these
monkeys will give you herpes. So much herpes.
Anyhow, that's the article. I was kind of left
like it was reported publicly by something like
not just a rumor by like somebody who should
have known that these things were infected with
things and like a weird amalgamation of many
things and i don't know if they were ordering
like separate infections with monkeys or if they
all had all of these infections and tulang came
in rather aggressively with those aren't our
monkeys and they do not have any infectious diseases
which I really hope there was a reporter at the
time that's saying like well how do you know
they don't have these if they're not your monkeys?
The Independent did a very poor job at this and
I'm left wanting more about the herpes maybe
don't have herpes monkeys and that's how I'm
left feeling on this Wednesday and with that
I don't know you guys got 48 hours you look up
like these are cross species infectious Like
I'm just what you know, let's not end it there
I do have a question if these maybe the monkeys
did have it It just can't like jump the species
barrier. That was not a question That was just
a thought out loud. Yeah, that was a anyhow I
go back you guys think about that too. Goodbye