You know what that sound means? It's another
episode of Game for a Movie where we ask, are
you game for a movie? My name is Mike. I am joined
by Jill. Andre. What's up, friends? Hey, not
much. You know, how's it going with you? Not
too bad. You guys kept me out too late last night.
So the movie I watched actually was split into
two showings. Okay. Because I woke up early and
watched the last 40 minutes this morning. Okay.
Did it make it better, whatever it was that you
watched, splitting it up like that? Yes and no.
But I'll explain when we get to me. First, we've
got to talk about what we're drinking. Hopefully,
we've recovered from yesterday. Oh, yeah. Yeah,
some of us just never stopped. Exactly. Yeah,
we went brewery hopping, and then we went to
karaoke. Yeah. That happened. We also got ramen,
too. It was a good day. Jill, what are you drinking
over there? Well, it's been featured on the podcast
pretty much, I feel like, every time me and Andre
are around. It's another Alvarian beer. We just
can't stop ourselves. I am drinking their Oatmeal
Stout Heavy Metal. There's some umlauts in there.
As I said, this is an oatmeal stout. I don't
normally go for stouts, but the weather's getting
a little cooler. So something like a beer like
this kind of this is that time of their year
for that. Right. It's got dark chocolate notes.
There's coffee in it, but it's actually like
really, really smooth. It almost has like a milky,
like a milky creaminess to it. Okay. And as the
can says, metal is fuck. And I agree with that.
6 .66%. Yeah. 6 .66%. Andre, what do you got
over there? I got the old reliable. I got a fairway
IPA from Thomas Hooker. Easy, easy sipper, you
know, a little lighter this afternoon. It's nice.
Very crushable IPA. Yeah. Not too bad at all.
I've got from outer light subduction. Oh, subduction
IPA standard. Oh, look at that. It's green screen.
It's for you. It's green screening out. That's
funny. No. All right. There. There you go. It
also matches my Gumby right now, which does.
Yeah. Yeah. We could have visited Outer Lights
yesterday. We didn't find our way over there.
We were in the zone. I'm not upset about it.
I already had Outer Lights at home. It's fine.
This subduction is standard here. It's very good.
I don't know how else to describe it. It's Connecticut.
Hit the beach, head for the hills. Subduction.
A tribute to the submarine capital of the world.
Forgot about that. Yeah. So our heavenly IPA.
All right. Enough about beers. We talk movies
on the show. Yeah. And Jill, you're going to
kick us off. All right. I watched the 2022 Netflix
animated movie, The Sea Beast. I remember seeing
marketing or at least an announcement for this
a while ago, maybe in 2021. And I got really,
really excited because I love animated movies.
I like pirate stories. Wait, you like animated
movies? Yeah, this is a surprise to me as well.
Yeah, right. I know, I kind of keep that side
of myself too, you know, pretty on the DL. But
as I was saying, I like... pirate movies and
i like sea creatures so this is all rolled into
one phenomenally voice casted and exquisitely
good looking film um like i said it's from it's
from netflix it stars carl urban as one of the
main characters and i don't think i've ever seen
him Or heard him do an animated role, but I thought
he did a fantastic job. Jared Harris, who is,
this is not the only film today that we're talking
about. Jared Harris pod. I wish Jared Harris
was in my movie now. I didn't get the memo. Marianne
Jean Baptiste. And I think he's becoming a new
favorite for me. Dan Stevens is in this as well.
Among many, many others. I've thought about how
to describe the film. The basic story is it's
set in a world where sea monsters roam the seas
and hunters are hired by the crown to eradicate
them so the empire can keep spreading, basically.
So it follows Carl Urban's character, Jacob,
and this young orphan girl named Maisie as they
kind of come together and land on the same boat.
And then... through shenanigans end up uh getting
to know the world of the sea beasts more okay
if you've ever seen moana and really liked uh
all of this well the promise of sea creatures
that they kind of set up at the beginning um
with like the sea crab and the other monsters
and then she goes down to like the realm of monsters
but thought there could have been more than that
yeah beast delivers like 10 times the amount
of creatures and it's amazing they're all really
cool and the way that they look and on that note
speaking of how things look this is a really
diversely drawn film animated all of the characters
are different ethnicities and different cultures
are represented so it's super cool to see a pirate
ship that just has a whole host of crew members
with different colors okay yeah tones and things
like that um so if you if you want to add more
have if you want to start watching more films
that have diverse representation i know this
is animated but this is a good one to include
in there yeah um and though it's a kid movie
this movie's got blood in it i like that i like
a kid i like a movie that doesn't isn't afraid
to uh to take off the kid gloves this is not
keys being jingled in front of your face to entertain
you this is actually a pretty smart movie and
the message is good if not a little heavy -handed
towards the end but what can you do right um
so i will happily watch this again i really want
andre to see it yeah and please put more put
carl urban in more voiceover roles he's done
a couple actually yeah he's in a tv series now
called arc He's a voice part four, but he's done
some voice work for... Well, it looks like a
lot of video games, I guess. Riddick Video Games.
Oh, yeah. I forgot he was in Riddick. And Star
Trek. He was also Sergeant Rock in the DC Showcase.
Which I haven't seen. Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry.
Ark isn't like the video game Ark? Ark, the animated
series, 2022. He's in two episodes as Bob. Okay.
Bob. Bob. Bob. interesting i don't know like
it's not out yet it's not out yet yeah um i also
need to point this out because i find this amazing
so he one of the things he starred in or was
a part of was hercules and xeno warrior princess
he was cupid what yes When did that come out?
This was Zeno ran from 1996 until 2001. It looks
like he was in a random episode, like many different
times. And then the first time he was Cupid was
96 in Hercules, the legendary journeys. So he's
like a baby. Cause like, he's so young looking
and Lord of the Rings. Well, and like, he also
played Julius Caesar in those shows as well.
And Julius Caesar is more who he played, but
Cupid just sounds more fun. Yeah. I mean, Carl
is a very versatile actor. Love him, love him
in things. Yeah. Need to watch more things with
him. But just going back to the sea beast, if
you are, if you have a kid or you yourself are
a fan of squash buckling adventures and you'd
like to see some creativity on the screen with
regards to like creature design, this is. right
up your alley i think who the people who worked
on this film really thought long and hard about
how these different sea monsters will exist in
the world and how they look okay and yeah it's
fun i don't know it's really scratched almost
in a weird way that like how to train how to
train your dragon i was gonna ask like is that
the kind of vibe i'm just like watching the trailer
on mute from there's a little how to train your
dragon they're very i would say that they are
not a one -to -one comparison no totally there
is a bit of human be friends creature going on
yeah we'll just think of like in like in a fantastical
environment that's kind of you know sort of based
on reality not really but you know swashbuckling
it does say on the poster from the award -winning
filmmaker of moana and big hero six and i gotta
say both of those feel like a right fit for this
like it's action but also like on the seas and
everything like that that would be chris williams
yeah He's been involved in one way or another
in a couple of Disney films that I've liked or
acknowledged that they exist begrudgingly. I'm
looking at you, Ralph Breaks the Internet. He
did this story. He was the writer for Emperor's
New Groove. He did Bolt. How could you hate him?
I've never actually seen Bolt. Bolt was great.
Bolt's weird. He's not done anything for me.
Bolt's weird. Don't get me wrong. It's weird.
I don't know. Animated dog movies. I'm never
really... I don't know. I don't really go to...
I don't really show up for those for whatever
reason. You know what I mean? It's also very
weird that he, as a writer, from 2009 to 2016
did nothing. And then 2016 to 2022 did nothing.
It's very weird. I don't know. Just taking a
break, you know? Just taking a break. You know,
yeah. R &R. But, yeah. He directed Big Hero 6
in there. He gave us Baymax or was part of the
team that gave us Baymax. Fine, Chris. It's 120
minutes almost so it is a little bit longer.
It's long for an animated film. You're having
a good time. I felt pretty invested into it and
I think that The way that there are some characters
in there that they set up to kind of be the antagonistic
forces, they're all really sympathetic in their
own motivations as to why they might want to
be doing something or can't back down from. what
the edge of uh making the right decision or the
wrong decision or how that could be seen differently
in different perspectives because that they're
all you understand where they're coming from
there is one thing at the end that kind of left
me like huh well the movie's just ended now so
i have no idea like what the repercussions of
this is but okay well I need to kind of know.
Otherwise, it breaks my brain a bit. You'll have
to see the movie to get what I'm talking about.
I mean, I would totally watch a sequel. I don't
know what they would do with it per se, but I
would show up to see an older uh jacob holland
which is uh carl urban's character and then uh
macy brumble she's the other main character um
she's a little girl in this one so seeing her
a little bit older would be kind of cool but
yeah so big fan we'll watch it again for sure
um so on a scale of zero or one but what is our
scales zero to five zero to five all right cool
then on a scale of zero to five That'd be a good
one. Bottles of rum. I'm going to give this a
five. I really liked it. I sound like a bit of
a broken record, so I apologize for the repetitiveness
of this. It was refreshing. It left me awestruck.
by just how good it looks yeah and it's kind
of almost a sort of a bummer weirdly i mean i
know it's like an old fucking argument to bring
up it's kind of a bummer that this is straight
to streaming right could have been sounds like
it would have been nice to see on the big screen
well it says that it was released in select limited
theaters yeah yeah right so i wonder i wonder
if it came anywhere near us this would have been
very cool but i also could see that depending
does it have i'm looking at the wikipedia page
the wikipedia page doesn't say what it's rated
okay um it's probably pg but i think if you were
um depending on your sensibilities with sharing
films with children if you brought let's say
a seven six year old to this the poster does
say pg yeah so then if you brought like a six
seven year old maybe even an eight year old might
have some sensory sensitivities like loud noises
or might just be easily skittish around things
yeah i could see some components of this movie
being in their eyes terrifying yeah um it's just
like i said this movie does not pull its punches
with some of its imagery and where it goes with
the story which i find refreshing yeah but being
able to watch this on a smaller screen with that
eight -year -old might be a better entry point
than surround sound on a big screen where they're
just consumed by the dark imagery that they're
seeing yeah yeah okay yeah and i this is one
of those rare times where i don't wish that this
was in 2d animation i think that yeah yeah cgi
it works and at times it looks like a painting
so it balances it well okay dope well we go from
a kid's movie to something that no kid should
see Nobody should have seen this. Well, no. No,
you're jumping. Am I jumping? Yes, we saved you
for last. Yeah, you're at the end, Andre. Yeah,
we talked about this. God bless it. Nobody should
see that one. I've been in a fugue state ever
since, so we'll wait for it. But you're in Harris.
I'm sorry. Go for it, Mike. Yes, we got to save
the Harris for later. Yes, yes. So the thing
I watched, I rented it last night. I watched
X. X is a horror movie. It's directed and written
by Ty West. And the reason I wanted to watch
this was because there's a movie called Pearl
that's out in theaters now. They were recording
them basically simultaneously. And so they released
Pearl really fast. It was only like six or seven
months after X that Pearl got released. They
didn't wait on anything. They just said we're
making these two movies. And I wouldn't be surprised
if there's a third two, but who knows? They said,
I'm looking at the page right now, a sequel,
Maxine, that's with three X's is in development.
And I also never heard of this movie. Who's the
production studio? I saw YouTube commercials
for this. So it's 824. It is 824. Yeah. And I
saw a ton of commercials for it. I thought it
looked really good. It looked very sleek. Basically,
the idea is it's 1979. This group of... Young
adults is what I will say, decide that they want
to go film a porno at a farm. Yes. And a lot
of what's brought up is they are going away from
Texas because all the televangelists and the
God fearing people and everything like that.
So they go and they basically have rented a cabin
and a barn on the property of. howard and pearl
now we don't see pearl we see howard he's just
like this old man um you know he warns you his
wife's not doing well but you're more than welcome
to do whatever that kind of thing first half
of this movie is a porno like it is it's boobs
dicks everything it is a porno so this is this
is rated r for very good so so to quote to quote
uh it's always sunny they show it they show all
of it they show it they show all of it wow uh
you see so the cast is actually pretty good i
actually really like this cast it's uh mia goth
is the main character maxine she also plays pearl
okay uh jenna ortega is lorraine also known as
church mouse because she's the one that is like
having second thoughts about doing all this stuff
britney snow is in this britney snow uh -huh
she's bobby lynn and her boyfriend is jackson
he does all the main lifting in the porno and
this blows my mind you say yes uh this blows
my mind that's kid cuddy yeah yeah kid cuddy
yeah yeah yeah yeah and he was excellent like
one of my favorite parts of this movie Yeah.
And then we have Wayne Martin Henderson plays
him. And then RJ, who's played by Owen Campbell.
RJ didn't make his big impact. So the six of
them hop in a van, go to this barn where they're
filming a porno called The Farmer's Daughters.
uh of course it is maxine and bobby lynn are
the main starlets jackson is the main star um
they all get theirs everything like that um things
change when lorraine the church mouse gets kind
of turned on by it so she decides she wants to
be in it too can they write her in she's dating
rj rj is not happy about it so he Is basically
going to leave them on their own. So he gets
to the van, all of a sudden pearls in front of
the van. And that's when hell breaks loose. They
all start getting killed off one by one. And
it is. Uber sexual and Uber gory. OK, that's
kind of sounds like what you're signing up for,
right? Exactly. It's exactly. Well, I don't know
if I wanted as much porno as I got. Because there's
literally like a part where Howard is like, have
you seen my wife to Jackson? And Jackson's just
standing in the doorway. And all you can see
is a shadow. But you can tell, like, he has this
massive penis. Because they kind of draw your
attention that way, too. Kid Cudi is packing.
Maybe. It's shaded. So you can't really tell.
It could just be a banana hanging there. Yep.
Yeah. Right. They could have fixed that in post.
Exactly. But I will say what I liked about it
is they took a lot of great camera shots. They
took a lot of like aerial views, for example,
and showing like distance between people and
objects and that kind of stuff. It was really
cool. The one thing I didn't like, they splice
in things to like drive their message home. the
end of the movie, and I'm not spoiling anything.
I'm not going to tell you anything that happens
or anything like that, but the end shots are
being spliced with like this preacher's message
on porn is the devil, like save your daughters.
They don't want to go down this road. And it's
just kind of like, okay, this is, this is a little
weird that we're just like, it's splicing, like
it's splicing, you know, it's not. So it's, that's
a little cut weird. But overall, I really liked
it. I split it into two parts basically because
last night you guys kept me out too late. Like
I said, sorry, like three o 'clock. That's when
the first body drops. And I was like, okay, if
this is where it's going downhill from here and
there's still 40 minutes left, I'll just watch
it in the morning. There you go. Yep. So I just
split it perfectly where I'm like, okay, I know
what's happening now. The bodies are starting
to hit the floor. i'll see it tomorrow morning
so yeah and it was very good um i'm interested
in seeing pearl i also wanted to watch pearl
because claire doesn't want to see it and usually
for movies we try to wait for each other yeah
pearl was something that was like okay i can
go see this on my own i know claire has no interest
so i had to watch this first one first because
i didn't know who pearl was and apparently there's
another one coming and i didn't know who maxine
was so I'm glad I watched this one. I'll say
3 .5 pitchfork tongs out of five. Wow. Okay.
That's pretty good. Can I just say something
about hyphenated names? Yes. One of the few things
that stuck with me from that, the Seth MacFarlane
Ted. is like when they're when ted's like telling
um aniline bobby lynn exactly that exactly i
was just like oh whenever i hear like a hyphenated
name my brain just goes right back to that yep
i love that too because he just like rattles
him off and he ended up saying it already and
ted's just like oh yeah it was bobby lynn he
goes fuck i love that part because he's just
so exasperated He's also just cycling through
all the permutations, so I think the second part
first, and then he's like, yeah, I've got to
figure out the first. He's like, Anna, Bobby,
Susie, and then he goes, wait, is any of those
with Lynn on the end of it? He goes, yeah, yeah,
yeah. Anna Lynn, Bobby Lynn, Susie Lynn, Jimmy
Lynn. This movie was also made for just $1 million.
That's how these horror movies work, right? That's
what's really cool about this one, too, is they
do really... It looks cheap. and not in a bad
way it's looking like what they're trying for
and the fact that they're trying to make a cheap
porno and it really only has two locations it's
not like they needed big extravagant sets or
anything like that so that's also why i think
they made both of them um so quickly They probably
filmed them back to back. They did, yes. Yeah,
I mean, you know, it's kind of like how these
war movies kind of work, right? Make them on
a budget, and if they do well, then they're super
profitable, right? Right, exactly. And now we're
going to probably transition into the phase of
where we have like seven of seven different movies
in the X series. And you're like, what? Yeah,
right. I'm kind of hoping it just sticks to three.
Yeah, me too. Maybe if I can take 24, like they
probably have a little bit more restraint on
that. But like, you know, I feel like I'm thinking
like insidious and like, you know, the just.
Scream at this point. The first two Insidiouses
are pretty good. I can't remember if I ever saw
the third one. But I'm just, or Paranormal Activity
is like the classic. It's Paranormal Activity
that they were like, oh, this is a cash cow.
Let's milk it. Oh, this is interesting. What
is? So the day after X's South by Southwest premiere,
writer -director Ty West revealed during pre
-production for this film, he had used his time
during a mandatory two -week quarantine in his
hotel to write a prequel, Pearl. As the production
for X wrapped, and also because the sets were
already constructed, he asked star Mia Goth if
she wanted to remain in New Zealand and film
Pearl, which she readily accepted. Oh, nice.
So it wasn't even a planned trilogy. It just
organically happened. Yeah. Which is cool. I
mean, like, that just, and that obviously means
that, like, you know, hey, there's something
creative there that they're excited about, right?
Right. So I'm sure that, you know, hopefully
Pearl is also well -received, right? Okay, real
quick, without looking it up, how many movies
do you think there are in the Insidious film
series? Six. Five. Wow. Okay. You guys nailed
it. It was five. The fifth one's coming out.
It's Insidious Fear the Dark. Is Patrick Wilson
still in them? He's directing this one, Patrick
Wilson. Okay. I mean, I have a thing for anything
Patrick Wilson does, so I guess if he's directing
it, I'd like it. He's in it as well. It says
he's in the cast. Yeah. I know I've seen one
and two. Is the third one the one with the key
in the name? No, that's the fourth one, the last
key. So there's Sidious and Sidious Chapter 2,
Chapter 3, and then The Last Key, and then Fear
the Dark. So maybe I never saw Chapter 3. I like
Chapter 2. I'm going to have to read. I can't
say I've seen any of them. The first one's pretty
good. Not going to lie. I may check it out. I
have nothing wrong with them, but it's just I'd
never have checked out. If anything, just do
it for Patrick Wilson. That's true. Alright.
We're going to take a commercial, but on the
other side, speaking of insidious things, we're
going to talk about a certain movie. So we're
going to take a quick break real fast. Come on
back. We will talk about a certain movie that
definitely is insidious in some way. But it took
the world by storm. And we're back. I hope you
enjoyed those commercials. Hope you enjoy the
show. because you're not going to enjoy this
next part uh i think they're going to enjoy the
misery that it brought i'm gonna say i can chat
about this movie so you guys don't have to watch
it right that's true uh andre you and jill both
watch so you're both going to jump in on this
yes a certain movie about a certain superhero
about a certain person. That's right. Wow, that
really narrows it down. Is he even a superhero?
No. Alright, guys, we watched Morbius. It's Morbin
time, y 'all. We got drunk and watched Morbius.
The only way to do it. Pro tip, that drinking
game does not mess around. No, it does not. At
all. What was our rules for the drinking game?
Drink every time they said, Michael, there are
bats. Somebody died. his eyes changed yeah the
eyes change ended up being the worst i don't
know i thought michael was pretty bad michael
was bad but like you know it's bad it's like
okay main character's name obviously gonna be
said a bunch no no no no there were times in
that movie well i even said it that there were
hearkening back to something and i'll get to
that in a little bit but like there were times
where i think matt smith's character was just
like i'm just gonna say his name a lot yep it's
true yeah his name's not milo by the way yeah
his name's not it's so weird this movie you know
you can you can clearly tell that there's a bunch
of studio interference with it right i mean i
don't even know interference is the right word
whatever it's like morbius it's the another entry
in sony's would be spider -man universe right
yeah uh i don't know i'm not a big i'm not i
don't read comics that much so i'm not a huge
uh morb head as it were but like you know morbius
is just it's he's he's a spider -man villain
right yeah and i think the biggest mistake this
movie makes is just the fact that they tried
to make it him a superhero right right this is
just a generic superhero origin story but he's
not a hero he's supposed to be a bad guy right
or at least right but they made him that was
yeah i agree they made him sympathetic like it's
not a hero because like he doesn't like he's
an anti -hero well right well he's supposed to
be like he at the in the world of this movie
there's a very clear bad guy and there's a very
clear good guy yes and morbius is the very clear
good guy but it's weird to know that in future
films he's supposed to be an antagonistic force
because i just don't see how we go from the morbius
of the first movie to the Morbius of whatever
movies may come. Because the whole entire plot,
like the whole main thrust of the plot is, you
know, obviously Morbius, Dr. Michael Morbius
and his best friend Milo, whose real name is
Lucian, but they just said, no, you're actually
named Milo now. And he just rolls with it. That's
Matt Smith. Everybody rolls with it. Yeah. They
both have this, this rare blood disease. They
never named, they actually never named this disease.
They just have it and they know it's real bad
blood. whatever yeah they requires a dialysis
for them every three times a day they can't walk
you know they're they're they're living on dying
living on borrowed time and and dr michael michael
morbius super awesome genius they open they open
the movie with him refusing the nobel prize because
he creates artificial blood uh as a failed experiment
to It was a failure to try to cure his disease.
And he refuses to treat it because it's the best
thing since penicillin, but it's a failure to
him. So he refuses to take credit for that. Yeah,
there's work still to be done. Work still to
be done. That's his whole thing. I would love
to be in a position to just say no to a Nobel
Prize. Yeah, right, right. yeah it's so yeah
the main thrust is oh hey he finally figures
out how to solve it solve his cure his disease
he creates a vial from from vampire bats right
it goes to costa rica yeah by vampire bats they
have three dna yeah yeah you have that you have
the hand coming up yeah exactly yeah right and
they they really really really really wanted
you to remember batman begins every single time
like there's like three different shots where
like he's surrounded by bats and then knock off
han zimmer starts playing you know what i mean
oh no wow like this is this is not an homage
this is just please please try to please try
to just pretend our movie is as good as a batman
begins please like our movie please yeah right
right um yeah you know morbius he uh you know
hey here's the disease he's excited about it
but oh no turns into a vampire starts accidentally
kills people oh he's on the ship he's on like
a ship off the coast of long island when this
happens which they showed like a a trailer like
an extended trailer of the ship scene yes right
right because you know they have to set up and
like so he because what he's doing is illegal
and clandestine and and oh milo is bankrolling
all of this stuff he's very rich for some reason
we don't know how i never found out that it looks
rich bankrolling this he's like you know like
morby's like hey god i i have i have a possible
path to curing this thing but it's very illegal
and very expensive and he's like sure cool anyways
they go they do they they do this experiment
on a boat uh and they you know we have morbius's
love interest uh what's her name uh martine martine
martine bancroft yes she doesn't get to do anything
cool in this movie she's supposed to be a badass
scientist lady uh she doesn't really do anything
cool or interesting which sucks cat she has a
cat yeah um I don't know. She's just there to
be a sexy lamp for Morbius. Anyways, they're
on this boat. you know, they strap them in, think
Green Goblin scene, like, you know, like, strap
them in, inject the serum or whatever, and, like,
you know, the mercenaries, like, one of them
walks down and just starts hitting on Martine
and just was like, you know. It's very random.
It's very random, but it was for the pure, like,
purpose of, like, oh, don't worry, Morbius is
about to kill all these people, but you won't
feel bad because they're all assholes, you know
what I mean? Right, yeah, exactly. We gotta make
these guys look like dicks. Yes, and it's, like,
very, like, it's just so, like, rogue. and it's
whatever dude like the he goes more he goes full
morbid morbid time he kills all them the action
is whatever it's a lot of slow -mo and it's just
like i don't know i just i struggled to feel
anything in this movie yeah you know inevitably
uh milo uh finds out that it did work in a way
but uh morbius is like no i can't give this to
you right yeah of course milo takes the the serum
and well he steals it off screen that's the thing
is that like i thought there was gonna be a whole
scene where milo turns evil no he steals it off
screen all for like this stupid like bait and
switch like they they hide that reveal they try
to hide that reveal until halfway through the
movie that oh no milo is actually evil because
like you know he's he he basically he one of
the nurses at Morbius' hospital that he works
at gets murdered. What's it called, Joe? What's
the word? oh exact exsanguinated exsanguinated
and yeah it whatever it was like oh no morbius
must have lost control and killed that innocent
nurse oh my god when so very clearly like you
know they know they don't show the scene is shot
in a way you don't see who killed her or whatever
right it's like yeah okay it's milo milo killed
her but like they didn't show like all right
cool you hid that reveal you hid that scene of
him going full more milo going full vampire just
so you could try to be like oh yeah what a shock
Milo's evil this whole time oh my god Andre was
saying there's elements of a decent movie in
here and I do agree with that but it's just so
everything is either rushed too quickly or they
leave out things that would justify motivations
such as Milo just jumping from I don't know,
not being a bad guy per se to suddenly being
like, yeah, sadistic killer. Yeah. It's very
generic. It's like, like Michael, we're not monsters.
We're the evolution. Like, it's like, it's so
many tropes that you've just seen so many times
before done better in other movies. And it's
like the action doesn't, the special effects
don't really hold up well enough to, for me to
be entertained on that front. Morbius is actual
superpowers are very vague and uninteresting.
It's like, okay, he's got super strength. They
can. jump super far, but he can sometimes fly
a little bit. Ride the wind. He can't just fly,
but he can glide on wind. Or is it sound? I don't
know. He has bat vision, so he has sonar. Literally,
some of these cuts were stripped straight out
of the Daredevil Ben Affleck movie, it feels
like, with the supersonic vision. Probably, for
me, the most frustrating point is throughout
the film, they're setting up the fact that the
artificial blood is not cutting it for morbius
it's not going to keep him his his cravings satiated
so towards the end of the movie we know because
he keeps reminding uh martine that like i only
can last about four hours on artificial blood
before i i hunger for more the movie ends with
that completely unresolved like okay cool so
what is your strategy yeah like what is your
strategy for fighting off your hunger because
you can't keep we know you can't keep doing artificial
blood but are you gonna get like a hook up at
the blood bank are you gonna team up with venom
and just eat bad guys like yeah like that that's
kind of frustrating yeah the movie definitely
does very much just end i mean thankfully quickly
like there's no there's no falling action it's
literally big final climax sorry if i'm gonna
spoil this movie for you you know we kill off
milo okay big giant big giant fight which is
kind of a shame i wish they had oh oh he finishes
milo off with a bat kamehameha like literally
like third like they're fighting in this abandoned
building and and morbius like you know he's down
on his he's he's he's you know he's on his last
legs it looks like he's about to you know give
out and then oh he suddenly has an idea to call
all of his bats to come and he's like a column
of bats think batman begins yet again bruce wayne
in the fucking bat cave and then he literally
like reaches out and does almost like you know
this like water dance with bats and he turns
his arms and literally like puts his arms together
to form a Kamehameha and shoots a pillar of bats
at Matt Smith. And then that gives him enough
time to run up and give him the anti -vampire
serum that also kills him. Yeah, of course. And
they did set up that there is another vial of
anti -vampire serum available to use on Morbius
if it ever should come. If it ever is needed.
So before we wrap up our discussion, because
there is a post -credit scene, we do need to
talk about the man of the hour, Jared Harris.
Jared Harris. Right, who is in this movie for
like 15 years. minutes i know not even i think
it's like six minutes it's so weird he's just
randomly in this he's the like they're he's supposed
to be the father figure to to milo and michael
well he's also like the doc so at the beginning
of the movie uh it starts in a flashback well
it starts whatever it's all over the fucking
place dude yeah milo and michael meet in a italian
greece italy i think it's greece Greek facility
for people with the rare blood disease, and Jared
Harris plays the doctor who oversees the program.
And then he stays with Milo and remains his,
I guess, on -call doctor into adult life. It's
kind of weird. Interesting. But he's there, and
he's definitely making the most of a very thankless
role, because there's just not much to do. there's
just like i don't understand what purpose he
serves in there because there's no scenes with
all three of them talking you know what i mean
like it's just okay there is what what when at
the beginning so after we get one when we see
adult milo for the first time and yeah we see
adult milo he wheels we find out he's fucking
wealthy as god and then that's it and it's like
oh okay like wow it's good to see you again Milo
let's go hang out and then like cool Jared Harris
is just like okay I'll leave you guys don't get
in trouble don't get in trouble bye and then
that's it right you're right yeah and there's
like there's no sense of like oh you know there's
no There's no interesting dynamic between any
of them. And it's like, why is Jared Harris?
Why is this character in this movie? He's supposed
to be a mentor figure. He doesn't teach Jared
Leto anything. He just tells him. No, Jared Leto
is established to be brilliant. Yeah, right.
The most important thing he does is says, hey,
I can tell you're really smart because you fixed
this machine. You're going to go to this super
special college for gifted people or school for
gifted people, which is implied to be Xavier's.
place, right? The X -Men school or whatever.
They don't name drop it because they don't have
the rights to it. That's a place for gifted individuals.
Holy shit. So many little cameos were like, guys,
this is part of the Marvel universe. Well, in
Marvel, so in Marvel comics, he's Emil Nikos.
They couldn't even say it. They had to put Emil
Nicholas. Right. It's just not a good movie.
And I said it earlier, but I'll come back to
it right now. This movie pulls, tries to kind
of wink and nod and like nod at things. At some
point, it just goes flat out rip off of The Lost
Boys. The fact that Michael was a drinking game
rule, take a name, take a drink every time they
say the name Michael. In The Lost Boys, Kiefer
Sutherland's character, David, frequently taunts
the main character, David, by going like, David,
Michael, Michael. And like, That just made me
want to watch a better vampire movie. Well, and
it does say in the trivia that basically Matt
Smith tried to become... Yeah, channel Kiefer
Sutherland's role in The Lost Boys. Well, Kiefer
Sutherland did not have a random dance sequence
to the song Sex. And I will say Matt Smith's
the brightest spot in this really dull movie.
And he and Jared Leto actually have very good
acting chemistry. There's like one scene where
you can kind of believe that they're friends.
You know what I mean? When they're talking in
New York City. Basically when he's, when Jared
Leto has to say, hey, I have a... planned but
it's going to be illegal and very expensive like
yeah you could kind of believe that okay these
are two characters from history right right more
of that it just movies just needed more time
you know yeah it's just it needs to actually
be longer i can't believe i'm saying which needs
to be either longer or like they just need to
cut out a lot of dumb bullshit you know what
i mean like there's just It's not even the worst
movie ever. It's just so bad. We gotta talk about
the actual infuriating part. If you've seen the
trailers for this movie, you may have noticed
that Sony tried to lay some breadcrumbs for what
might be building towards a Sinister Six film.
And to do that, in the trailer, they put Adrian
Toomes, Michael Keaton's character from the first
MCU Spider -Man Homecoming. And in the trailer,
they make it look like Morbius and Toomes run
into each other in jail. And they exchange some
words. In the actual movie, none of that happens
in the film. He randomly... There are two post
-credits scenes. One is... sudden is spider -man
spoilers for no way home i guess that's cool
you guys but whatever um i'll keep it vague the
the universe terror opens up and dumps adrian
tombs for some reason well it's probably because
he's in jail in the mcu and whatever he gets
dumped into whatever and then they just immediately
like they cut to like easily he says oh the food's
better in this joint and then like it's like
it cuts straight to a news broadcast where they
say a man identifying himself as adrian tombs
randomly showed up in this jailhouse and we immediately
released him because he was wrongfully imprisoned
because we have no records yeah yeah and then
this the second post -credit scene jumps to morbius
in a car driving somewhere he got a letter a
message from tombs to meet him i don't know how
they found one another and he goes out to this
location tombs shows up full vulture costume
so he's rebuilt the suit in this universe and
he's like yeah you and i should team up we could
no no he was like hey thanks for meeting me doc
i'm not sure how i got here has something to
do with spider -man i think like literally like
that's the line like it's thinking it has something
to do with spider -man Morbius doesn't know who
that is yeah no right and then he's like oh Palpatine
survived somehow yeah right and um you know he
says he tells Morbius oh I think I think we should
team up a group of guys like us could do something
good together and Morbius is like okay he's like
that's I'm intrigued yeah it's very clear so
a it's very clearly it's like just shot reverse
shots it's very clear that they just you know
had like some sort of like clip like like it
does not look like these characters are in the
same scene no they are absolutely not in the
same scene um and also michael keaton's like
the vulture has his mask on the whole entire
time so he's all cgi so it's very clearly the
studio was like we're just gonna we're just gonna
make a new goddamn after credit scene call michael
keaton and have him record two lines on his phone
please you know right yeah and we'll explain
why it sounds so bad because he's wearing the
mask yeah but it's just like what like what is
this setting up why and this comes back to the
ending like why would this version of morbius
be a villain right I don't understand unless
his need for blood is what pushes him to the
other side of the scale because nobody understands
him. But didn't we already get that with like
the Sandman? Yeah. And all the other rogues gallery
people in the Spider -Man movie. I can't wait
to see how Andrew Garfield cures him. Yeah. With
some science classroom stuff. I don't know. So
that was a movie. we watched it it wasn't the
worst movie i've ever seen but it was it is exactly
what it looked like you know what i mean better
here's the right question to ask better or worse
than eternals wow um i think eternals is a better
movie i think eternals has more interesting characters
in it there are way more characters more characters
and some of them have an arc which is more than
you can say about any character in morbius really
yeah um That being said, I had more fun watching
Morbius because I was drunk and making fun of
it. I had more fun watching Morbius too because
I was drunk and making fun of it. That's it,
right? Like I had more enjoyment out of Morbius,
but not in the way that it was hoping. You know
what I mean? There's a timeline. No, I would
not watch a Morbius too. You know what I mean?
There's a future where I would rewatch Morbius
knowing it'd be a fun time. There isn't a future
where I'm going to rewatch Eternals. That's fair.
Unless the MCU makes it the most pivotal movie
in the multiverse saga. I feel like I need to
watch it before Eternals 2, but not necessarily
any other time before that. Yeah. You know? I
can't say anything about Morbius, but with Eternals
at least. Although they're supposed to be popping
up wherever. They better pop up. So far they've
been quiet. Yeah, right. So we're supposed to
see these Eternals somewhere some way down the
line where they just pop up and they're like,
Spider -Man, we're going to help you and then
we're going to disappear. Because we can do that.
Yeah. And then Thanos' brother. Yeah. Harry Styles,
you mean. Harry Styles. Don't worry, darling.
That's another movie we're probably going to
have to watch for this podcast, huh? Yeah. It
was one that I kind of wanted to watch when I
saw the first trailer. And now I feel like I
have to watch because of the drama. I just feel
like the drama just put a microscope on a film
that probably was not very good to begin with
and is like doubled, made everyone paid attention
to it. And that's why it's even being worse.
I think critics score for the Rotten Tomatoes
for Don't Worry Darling would have been like
50, 60, maybe 70, maybe. Now it's going to be
20, 30. Just because of all this drama on the
outside. Yeah, it just brought so much attention
to it that it didn't need. Alright, ratings.
We gotta rate this vampire. This one's like a
1 .5 artificial blue bags of blood out of 5.
I'll give it a 1 .2 out of 5 weird, random, unnecessary
dance scene. Oh man, that was my favorite part
of the movie. When he just randomly danced to
sex. Yeah. Watch the Matt Smith Morbius dance.
Watch that. A little slight spoiler for House
of the Dragon. Andre's like, you know about the
Matt Smith sex scene. And I'm like, what? Is
he like the sad boy at the orgy? He's like, no,
no, no. If anything, it's the opposite. Oh, happy
boy at the orgy. Happy boy by himself, solo in
the bedroom. He's feeling himself, but not in
that way. One of the, one of like the, like the
only time the movie shows any kind of soul, but
also it's just totally random. It's like, okay,
why was that here? I wonder if they were like,
remember that scene in Spider -Man three? Yes.
Yes. We think this is a good idea. oh my gosh
you know matt smith was having oh yeah that sounds
miserable not gonna lie please stop please stop
while you're behind but what about the craven
movie no i don't want to watch a craven movie
i don't care wasn't craven supposed to be in
the actual universe i thought i have no idea
no it's it's a solo movie in this universe yeah
as far as i know because i thought it was supposed
to be before they got the idea for like multiverse
everything like that I just remembered, I read
on IMDb, this is not a direct quote, but according
to IMDb, Morbius was supposed to be the eighth
film in the timeline that Sony is doing. And
then they made changes and obviously moved its
placement up. Yeah, well, right. Well, that's
kind of weird. What does that even mean? Is it
like, I don't really know. even you know before
this movie before all the memes and everything
like well that's part of why the memes took off
oh it's morbin time like that was just you know
it's a joke in so far as morbius is not a super
iconic character in my opinion right yeah he's
not gonna pull in he's not gonna pull in you
know um even if he they had like a doctor octopus
solo movie i feel like that would get more attention
you know what i mean that character stockbox
well known registers right exactly yeah but keeping
that in mind like this was originally planned
to be a film that would occur way later it explains
a lot yeah why they decided to move it up i i
did not find anything on imdb about that but
yeah eight films were supposed to happen before
morbius okay I wonder why. Maybe it was because
they locked Jared Leto in and they're like, oh,
let's get it out. Let's get it, yeah. Or maybe
they thought with the Multiverse of Madness,
no, not Multiverse of Madness, sorry, No Way
Home, that that gave them enough connective tissue
to put Morbius there. But I feel like that could
have been any villain story. Yeah. And then Venom
is not even, is mentioned as a joke. Yeah. Right.
but not mentioned any other way. I'm trying to
find that line, but yeah. Yeah, it's weird. Do
I look forward to the future of the Sony Micro
Spider -Verse? No, stop. Stick with Spider -Verse
and just please make those two movies good and
then I want to be done. God. Let me go. Please.
Not everything needs to be in a cinematic universe.
If you want to keep your rights and have these
superhero IPs, that's fine, but do something
interesting with them that morbius is not interesting
and it doesn't like it so desperately tries to
connect to everything else that's within this
nascent sony spider -verse but it just none of
it makes any sense none of it adds to a larger
picture And, you know, all of these companies
try to, try to be the next MCU. And even the
MCU is having trouble being the next MCU right
now. You know what I mean? Like they're not even
capturing the magic. Yeah, exactly. You're right.
I, you know, I don't, I think the infinity saga,
you know, as somebody who's enjoying phase four,
I think more than most people judging by the
internet, the infinity saga is going to, I feel
like it's, it's, it's, it's a once in a while.
And once it does a one -time thing, you know,
it's going to be hard to recapture that. So yeah,
that magic. The patience is just not there. Yep.
Cool. All right. Well, unlike Morbius, it's not
Morbin time. We are closing off Game for a Movie.
I've been your host, Mike. I've been joined by
Jill. I'm Morbin. It's Andre. We'll see you next
time on Game for a Movie where we ask, are you
game for a movie? Thanks for listening, guys.