You know what that sound means? It means it's
another episode of Game for a Movie where we
ask, are you game for a movie? My name is Mike.
I'll be your host this evening. I am joined by
no one, actually. So there's nothing wrong. There's
no problems, nothing like that. It has become
ridiculously hard with our schedules to record
all of us at the same time. Not only record,
but also watch bad movies together, that kind
of stuff. I am getting this out here because
you lovely people. deserve content. I have watched
a bad movie. I'm going to give you the rundown
of the bad movie. I also might do this a little
quicker than our normal episodes. Our normal
episodes run about an hour. I'm probably going
to do this maybe 40 minutes or so. Maybe less
or maybe more. Who knows? I just want to give
you all of my thoughts on this movie and I want
to make sure you get that content you've come
to know and love from Game for a Movie. Andre
and Jill are still very much a part of this.
So is Mitchell, so is T -Dog if he ever shows
up again. Everybody is perfectly fine. This is
also a very good time to announce that I am launching
a division of Game for a Movie. Game for a Movie
is still the main. Be all, end all. I want it
to be a part of this. But as we keep having weeks
where we're not able to meet up, that kind of
thing. To release some content, I've decided
on a new show that is a division of Game for
a Movie. It is called iStream. iStream is all
about ice cream and then whatever you can stream
on streaming services. I'm going to try to watch
some of the more up -to -date, newer things,
tell you if they're worth your shot or not. As
always, there's going to be some good movies,
some shit, some TV. Who knows what I'm going
to get involved into, but that's going to be
iStream. It is only going to run on weeks where
we cannot get a Game for a Movie episode together.
And it's probably just going to be launched under
the same name or under the same umbrella. Because
I don't want to lose everybody, honestly. It
truly is a blast to be able to talk about good
movies, bad movies with some of your best friends.
So, Game for a Movie, main show. It's not going
anywhere. I would prefer to record Game for a
Movie episodes over iStream any single day of
the week. But because you deserve content and
because I don't want to go like we have the last
two months without an episode, I am launching
a separate project. It's not even that separate,
but I'm launching a separate project so that
there's constant content coming your way. If
you like the sound of my voice, please check
out iStream when I launch it, which is hopefully
going to be in two weeks. I will be at my good
buddy of mine's bachelor party this weekend,
so there's probably not going to be a Game for
a Movie episode or an iStream episode, but I
still hope to get new content out for you shortly.
Alright, enough about that announcement. Let's
jump into What Am I Drinking? We always do this
on the show. I have a Foam Economics Pilsner.
It is a slow pour Pilsner from Black Pond Brews,
which is in Dayville, Connecticut. I host trivia
there sometimes. They just put this on their
menu. It is a hoppy Pilsner. And it's been described
as it takes five minutes to pour. Trust me, it
is worth every minute waiting for it. It's like
a Guinness in the fact that it just gets better
the more you let it sit. I chugged it when I
was hosting trivia there the other night. They
gave me a four pack after the night. And let
me tell you right now, I've let this sit after
I cracked it open. This is going to be the first
sip. It's still delightful in the can. And I
don't get paid more for trivia by giving them
a shout out. But I do like them a lot. I just
wish they weren't as far away as they are. They're
an hour and a half from my house. So it takes
three hours for me to drive there and back. This
place would be my local neighborhood bar if it
was closer. Enough about what I'm drinking. Let's
talk about what I watched. As being bookish podcast
guest on our Twitter account, that is at Game
for a Movie, you can always guess our bad movie,
and you can get your promo featured in the episode
if you guess it first. I watched 2017's The Mummy.
The one with Tom Cruise. Yes, that one. So here
are some of my thoughts on the movie. I'm going
to tell you basically my notes as I was watching
this movie because I typed a lot of them. There's
like five pages of notes. 1 ,010 words. Normally
it's a little more fun when we have some people
interject. So if you guys have thoughts, comments,
concerns, you can reach out to us at GameForAMovie
on Twitter, at GameForAMovie on Facebook, or
at GameForAMovie on Instagram. We also have a
TikTok as well. That's when I'll be taking you
behind the bad. I don't know why I'm just sending
you on a wild goose chase to find all our stuff,
but you should follow us if you love us. Let's
get started with this movie, The Mummy, from
2017. We start this movie, and we are in England,
1127 AD. Yes, England. This is not Egypt. That
threw me off right off the bat, but at least
they did kind of cover it. We see a guy go into
a coffin, and that's all we learn. That's all
we find. Before we flash to the present, present
day, they are making a new railway line in London,
and they just so happen to come across this crypt
filled with a bunch of coffins of dead... We
learn through news position, which is exposition
through the newscasts, that these are Crusader
Knights, and that they invaded Egypt before they
returned to London. I don't know why we need
these Crusader Knights, but they're Crusader
Knights. They invaded Egypt and they returned
to London. That's all I know so far. One of the
people that discovers the crypt is Henry Jekyll.
And the only reason I know this is because I
know what they were trying to do. with the whole
Dark Universe. If you don't know about the Dark
Universe, this was going to be the first movie
of many that brought all the monsters together.
So there was going to be the mummy, there's going
to be Dracula, Wolfman, I think the creature
from the Black Lagoon. All of these were supposed
to be brought together. Oh, and Frankenstein.
And Russell Crowe plays Dr. Henry Jekyll. You
can only guess what monster he plays. So he starts
monologuing in his head, and I don't know at
this point if I would have rather him just talk
out loud to himself, because he's just laying
out exposition, and he knows this whole story
of Amunet, who is the mummy in question. She's
played by Sophia Boutella. Basically, she was
promised the throne, and then all of a sudden
the pharaoh... had a son. And we all know how
it usually works with these familiar lines and
everything like that. They always choose a son.
I don't know why. I don't agree with it. Doesn't
matter. That is what happens. So, Sofia Botella
plays Amunet. She notices that her time is going
to come, that she's going to get passed over.
She's also an adult when this baby boy was born,
which is really strange. Mostly because what
I know of history is people didn't live that
long and they didn't have babies late in life.
So that there's like a 20 year gap between Amunet
and the baby boy or whatever. It was kind of
strange to see. But she makes a deal with essentially
the devil. They don't ever clarify. It's just
this demon that it's like the demon of life and
death. She makes a deal. She kills the baby,
kills her father, and then she tries to release
a demon into the world through her chosen beloved.
I said at this point, dear lord, this is dark,
therefore the dark universe. And I will also
say the color palette was very dark for this
movie as well. It really was a dark universe.
So after that happens, basically, she tries to
kill her boyfriend to release this demon into
the world. She needs to kill a mortal man for
him to take over this demon. Basically, the ritual
gets interrupted, she gets mummified, he gets
killed, all this stuff happens. So now we flash
to Mesopotamia, or Iraq present day, and people
are shooting these historical figures, and so
we meet our two main characters. Our two main
characters are played by Tom Cruise and Jake
Johnson. And honestly, at this point, I kind
of like their chemistry. I think a buddy comedy
between the two would actually be okay. They're
trying to figure out how to get rid of these
insurgents that are shooting all the historical
artifacts in Iraq and how they can go in and
steal stuff. Basically, that's what they're doing.
Jake Johnson says, why don't we launch an airstrike
that will make them run? And Tom Cruise is like,
that's a bad idea because then we'll get 20 years
in Leavenworth and because the military will
know why we're here. And Jake Johnson goes, well,
why not? I mean, we are looters anyway. And Tom
Cruise says to him, we are not looters. We are
liberators of precious antiquities. This line,
this, this line, um, it's something else. And
I mean, it's. It's funny because Jake Johnson
and Tom Cruise, who, uh, Jake Johnson, his name
is Corporal Vale. I have to clarify that because
on the IMDB page it says Sergeant, but he definitely
never makes Sergeant. So, Corporal Vale and Sergeant
Nick, uh, can't remember his last name, but Nick.
Sergeant Nick. Basically, Jake Johnson, Sergeant,
er, Corporal Vale, I'm gonna say Sergeant Vale
a lot. Corporal Vale says, I'm not going with
you. I'm not going to try to kill all these insurgents
because it's just not worth it. We're going to
die. So to get him to do that, Nick cuts his
water in the desert. And I said, what an asshole.
Basically, then Jake Johnson's just like, you
know, the nearest water supply is like 100 miles
away. This is the most worst thing you could
have ever done. And Nick goes, no, the closest
water supply is in the town. Of course. He says,
we're just going to slip in, slip out, get our
stuff, and then go. What we didn't know as well
is he stole this letter for this girl named Jenny,
and it's signed by Henry, which we can only guess
at this point is Henry Jekyll. They go in, everything's
a shitstorm. They're running for their lives,
running across rooftops. At this point, I've
actually liked this movie. Like, it's okay. It's
not great, but it's kind of fun. Decent chemistry.
I don't know if it would be the best buddy comedy,
but it would be enough that I would actually
enjoy myself kind of thing. Well, so finally
Jake Johnson has enough, and he's like, I'm going
to launch an airstrike. I know you said not to,
but I'm going to do it. Airstrike happens. All
the insurgents run away, just like Jake Johnson
said. It also reveals this big hole in the middle
of the town, which reveals Haram, or Haram, or
whatever it is. H -A -R -A -M. which is this
old town that basically is cursed. So, our colonel
comes in, who's played by Courtney Vance. Courtney
Vance, I love him. I don't know why he's not
in more things, and he really was a minor part
in this. Basically, he yells at the two, and
we're just like, you guys are idiots, you were
supposed to be 100 miles away, or 100 clicks
away is what he said. The guys are like arguing
with him saying, oh, they thought they were prisoners
or whatever, but the civilians had all been cleared.
So they got the insurgents out of the way. And
now we've got harem. Meanwhile, this girl comes
up and is just like, oh, Morton, that's Nick's
last name, Morton, Morton. And he turns around
and she slaps him like immediately. And it's
just like, how dare you steal my letter? How
dare you go to harem without me? You're the worst
human being on the face of the planet. And the
colonel's like, what the hell do you guys have
relations? And she goes, he thinks I'll be embarrassed
by this, but I had him in my room the other day.
He just basically stole this letter from me after
15 seconds of sex. Yes, we had a 15 second sex
joke. And that is something that is recurring
in this movie. At this point, I've made a note
that Christopher McQuarrie, the writer for this
thing. He is one of the most interesting guys
on the face of the planet for writing. A lot
of his movies are Tom Cruise stars, which is
okay. The funny thing that is about Christopher
McQuarrie is he got to start on NYPD Blue for
like one episode as a writer. Then he wrote The
Usual Suspects, which is my second favorite movie
of all time. I definitely enjoy it and I think
it's one of the best written even. So it's really
weird when you... Consider some of the other
things. He wrote a couple other things, then
Valkyrie, then The Tourist, both of which I say
were subpar, then Jack Reacher and Jack the Giant
Slayer, all of which at this point are just very
subpar to me. And then he wrote Edge of Tomorrow,
Mission Impossible, Rogue Nation. The Mummy in
Between, Mission Impossible Fallout, Top Gun
Maverick, and the next two Mission Impossible
movies coming out, Dead Reckoning Part 1 and
Dead Reckoning Part 2, which I didn't even know
had a title at this point, but I'm happy to know
that now. So he's one of those people I just
think he has the weirdest track record for writing,
because I think he has some of the best out there,
and then he has some of the worst out there.
So they go into this cave, obviously, because
they need to see what's inside it. And they find
out that there's just mercury dripping from the
ceiling and they don't see an issue with it.
They just like literally catch it on their bare
hands and they're like, it's mercury. Look at
this. And obviously Jenny's with them. She's
an archaeologist. We don't know what of, but
she's an archaeologist. She knows a ton of stuff.
She reads this thing and it's like a warning
to keep or to intruders to keep people out. obviously
at this point she's reading to a camera so we
get the most exposition just because she's talking
out loud to a camera recording herself telling
people to keep out there's all this jewelry and
stuff like that so of course our main characters
jake johnson and tom cruise start stealing anything
they can get their hands on jenny finds out that
all this mercury is leading into a pool and then
The watchers, which are these Egyptian gods,
are facing in towards the pool instead of out,
which means we don't care about what's coming
in. We care about what's coming out. So obviously
it's a prison. This dialogue is completely predictable
because at this point I've read all of it and
said basically every line, line for line. They're
about to get bombarded by more insurgents. The
radio's like, you need to get out of there. Insurgents
are coming, blah, blah, blah. Jenny's like, I
need more time. You need to get this thing out
of there because I need to see what it is. So
Tom Cruise just shoots this chain that's holding
this prison in and basically it rises out of
the mercury and spiders start coming into the
tomb and Jake Johnson gets bit. Also, Tom Cruise
starts seeing flashbacks. We don't know how at
this point, but he sees flashbacks and basically
it shows her or shows him the mummy. And she
has chosen him and they share this passionate
kiss. And the reason he sees her is because he
freed her. So I know right now he's the next
mortal man sacrifice because he's going to become
the god of death, whatever. They don't even say
it at this point, but it's pretty obvious at
this point. So they get out of the hole. They
get the tomb out. I don't know, or the sarcophagus
out. I don't know how they did that so quick,
especially with the insurgents coming. They just
did somehow. And all these crows start flying
into the desert and landing. And they're kind
of like, oh, that's interesting. Hmm. They all
know it's cursed. They all know Harem is cursed.
Yet they don't think anything of these crows.
So what? I don't know what's happening there.
I also swear at this point they called Jake Johnson
Nick. So both Tom Cruise and Jake Johnson's characters
are named Nick. even though one is named Corporal
Vale, who doesn't have a first name, except for
maybe this Nick part, and then Sergeant Nick
Morton. They get onto this plane. Nick sits next
to Jenny, and Corporal Vale, Jake Johnson, is
basically laying on his own, and his eyes just
go into his head. That all happens. He's chilling,
whatever, blah, blah, blah. Um, Nick and Jenny
are talking about this 5 ,000 year old sarcophagus,
blah, blah, blah. You know, it's everything like
that. And then she, then Nick goes, why did you
mention to the Colonel that it was 15 seconds
of passion? Like it was definitely more than
that. And Jenny's going, this is the biggest
discovery of my life. And you want to talk about
the sex? Really? So she walks away. They all
kind of fall asleep. Nick has a flashback to
see this girl and finds out that he's being called
centipede, which is the chosen one. And he wakes
up all of a sudden out of nowhere because he
saw that this ceremonial dagger is getting jabbed
into his chest. And he sees that Jake Johnson
is standing over the sarcophagus. Courtney Vance,
the colonel. standing over and going like what
the hell are you doing get away from that blah
blah blah and Jake Johnson stabs him twice at
this point this movie is okay like I'm alright
on this well they're freaking out about the fact
that Jake Johnson has like his eyes in the back
of his head and he's just like walking towards
them so he accidentally gets shot three times
by Nick so I'm thinking to myself there goes
your biggest stars Courtney Vance Doesn't come
back the rest of the movie, and Jake Johnson
is gone for a significant amount of time. They're
trying to figure out where they're going, so
they go to the pilots, and these birds all of
a sudden fly into the engine, and they fly into
the cockpit, and the plane is going down, and
we get the trailer scene. This is the scene that
you've seen where the plane's going down. Nick
gives Jenny a parachute. And like pulls it, gets
her safe, and then Nick crashes into the ground.
Tom Cruise is dead. That's the end of the movie,
right? No, there's much more. I'm going to take
a quick break. I'm going to give you a promo
as well for our friend Being Bookish podcast.
Ray is amazing. Check her out. Literally, she
is one of the first people we met on Twitter.
She is truly phenomenal. Her show is amazing.
I can't say enough about her, so please be sure
to check out her show. Of course, after you listen
to us. But here is her promo, as well as you
can find her on Twitter at being underscore bookish.
It is a world of spoiler free book reviews in
a podcast, all fiction genres, always looking
for fiction book recommendations. And she is
based in the UK. So here is Ray's promo. for
her show Being Bookish. I'll see you after the
break. Light the candles, get yourself a fresh
cup of something hot or a glass of something
chilled, and settle back to enjoy a selection
of 100 % spoiler -free book reviews. Whether
you're a fan of cozy mysteries, horror, romantic
comedies, science fiction, or anything else you
might find on the bookcase, Being Bookish is
a great place to start. Join me, your host, Ray,
as I take a joyride through the books on my bookshelves
and journey into new territories with recommendations
every week. You may even hear a few interviews
with authors along the way. Find every episode
of Being Bookish wherever you find your podcasts.
We are back! I hope you enjoyed that promo. Seriously,
Ray is one of our best friends in the business.
I'm only on page two of my five -page notes.
I thought this was only going to be 40 minutes,
but it may be longer. We'll see what happens.
Who knows? Tom Cruise is dead. The plane has
crashed. And basically, they need Jenny to identify
the bodies. Well... Tom Cruise wakes up and he's
in a body bag and he unzips himself. And at this
point, I'm sitting there going, why do they have
a zipper on the inside of a body bag? That's
insanely creepy to me. I really hope that's not
true because if this happens more than once that
somebody wakes up after being dead, there's a
problem. He has a toe tag on. He's like freaking
out. He also sees Jake Johnson. And Jake Johnson
is still looking like he has his eyes in the
back of his skull. He basically says to him,
we're both cursed. You need to do whatever she
wants so that we can get past this curse right
away. And then, of course, there's this whole
scene of Jenny and the medical examiners coming
into the room and he's naked and he's talking
to himself in the room. So Jenny's onto him and
is like, hmm, there's something weird with him.
Maybe I should take him to go see Henry. Meanwhile,
we have a scene across London. Basically, there's
these guards that have found the wreckage of
the plane. They're trying to figure out what
they can salvage and everything like that. One
of the guys comes across the sarcophagus and
it's empty. And then we get a bird jump scare.
Because you know what's better than normal jump
scares? A bird jump scare. The guy is examining
the sarcophagus. He sees this body outside of
the sarcophagus and is like, okay, I need to
check out this body. Flips her around and it's
the mummy. And she is looking skeleton -ish.
And so we're all kind of like, cool, you know,
she's been dead for this many years. The guard
is just kind of like, this is no problem, blah,
blah, blah. And then all of a sudden she grabs
him and kisses him. I don't know why she has
to kiss him to kill this guy. Basically, she
sucks the life force out of him. He becomes this
skeletal mess and also becomes a zombie. There's
a second round of exposition where Jenny is explaining
to Tom what has happened, as well as then Tom
Cruise goes to the bathroom, which is, of course,
a women's room because, you know, comedy. And
he sees Jake Johnson in the mirror who also says,
like, this is the curse. This is what happens.
You are supposed to be killed because you're
this mortal man and you will become the god of
death. He sees also these rats that start attacking
him. And they're just horrible CGI. But he has
seen this vision of this church he needs to go
to. He goes to the church. These zombies attack
him. Obviously, Jenny comes and saves the day.
But before that happens, the mummy is like about
to stab the dagger into his chest and realizes
the dagger's jewel is gone. And so I call this
Deus Ex Missing Dagger Jewel. I don't know how
the dagger got there in the first place. That
was something that was always very confusing.
And basically they're talking after they get
past the zombies, after they get past the mummy,
they start talking like Jenny and him start talking.
And it just becomes like so serious, so melodramatic.
And it's this movie. What the biggest problem
with it is, is it flips from melodrama to like
Marvel humor where it's like very forced and
out of nowhere and it doesn't serve a purpose.
It's just there. They get attacked in their ambulance,
which is the most inconspicuous vehicle ever.
And so like the mummy is like standing over Nick
and is about to like. Bring him to get the jewel
and everything like that. When all of a sudden
she starts getting shot. With all these like
harpoons and these like blow darts and whatever.
And basically it's this mysterious crew. We don't
know who they are. And they also shoot Nick.
And then Jenny's just fine. We get taken to the
Monstera de Prodigium. which is basically a warning
of monsters. This is the home of Jekyll and his
team. And just in case you didn't put two and
two together, that is Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
I think y 'all are smarter than this movie is.
He basically grabs like this, I'll say cure,
and he starts transforming into Hyde and jams
himself in the hand so that he doesn't become
Hyde. And it just reminds me that they wanted
this dark universe just so badly. They were setting
it up and everything like that. They thought,
no way this fails. We're going to get this dark
universe. Yeah, no. So they take him over to
the mummy. The mummy is being like, she is basically
tied up. They have these things going into her
neck that are just filling her blood with mercury.
So it's basically going to kill her. And then
they're going to dissect her and find out what
makes her tick and everything like that. And
of course, Jenny's upset about it. She's like,
this is the best discovery I've ever made. I've
been working for you and your secret government
for forever. What the hell? And they also tell
Nick that he's connected to her and he won't
ever get away because he's cursed and she's inside
his head. so she's inside his head and we need
to figure out how to get you away from this curse
there's this whole conversation between jenny
and nick where she's like i know you're a good
man i know because you gave me the only parachute
without hesitation and when the plane was going
down and he goes i thought there was another
parachute and like it's like 100 just like awkwardly
delivered and i just put get wrecked at this
point Jenny starts talking to the mummy to try
to get her to, like, release Nick from this curse.
She, of course, is like, no, he's been the chosen
one. At this point, I also think if Nick is cursed
and the chosen one, like, they just kill him.
Just kill him. Because then she can't get what
she wants. That's what Jekyll was thinking as
well. And so they get the jewel and they bring
it. Because the one place that would be perfect
for them to bring this jewel and this dagger
together is where the mummy is. You know, movie
logic. So they have it all together and they're
just like, we're going to kill you, Nick. But
it's for the greater good. And basically, Jekyll
starts having these problems and you're like,
oh, he's going to turn into Mr. Hyde. Okay, yeah,
this is going to be a problem. Nick grabs his
antidote and... Meanwhile, Amunet is able to
get free enough from this Mercury thing to get
a bug that she can control, like a literal bug
cockroach thing, to go into the security guard's
ear to free her. So, Hyde and Nick are having
this fight. There's a security guard that's basically
worried about the fact that Jenny's just like
running around in the facility, even though Jenny
is just like trying to go to the mummy and make
sure she doesn't escape. Everybody probably should.
And the security guard frees Amunet. She starts
vomiting this fake mercury and it's like really
bad CGI fake mercury. And Nick is having a hard
time with Hyde, but they're locked in this room
together because the facility knows what Hyde's
problems are and they won't let him get away.
And so they're just like fighting and like throwing
each other around the room, blah, blah, blah.
Nick gets... away enough that he can grab the
antidote and just jabs him in the chest and like
hides like good work and then throws him across
the room and then starts convulsing and becomes
Jekyll when did Russell Crowe become bad at acting
by the way because this was awfully acted it
was terrible there's no good delivery of lines
for either character I was hoping it would be
better because I thought he could handle this
this would be a good role for him nope So they
find out that our Jenny says, well, if we destroy
the stone, we can save the day and you won't
be cursed anymore. Blah, blah, blah. They're
like, OK, we're going to grab this stone. We're
going to destroy it. So Nick and Jenny run together.
Of course, there's this fire that explodes up,
separates the two. And Nick stops because Amunet
is in his head and is like, I'm going to save
you. No, that's not what happens. Amunet runs
away, grabs the dagger and is like, I'll see
you another time. And like runs away to where
these this crypt was found because she's like,
I can make these guys zombies, you know, as they
do. Nick and Jenny run away. There's this sandstorm
through the city, which is probably one of the
best powers that she has. And they only use it
once. It's a waste of time. And then Nick sees
Vale. Or Jake Johnson. And Jake Johnson is just
like, come on, I can help you. I can help you
get the stone and I can help you smash it. I
don't get this part. Because literally, Vale
told him, you need to do what she wants so we
can break the curse. It's not even like you were
tricked into this believable situation. You knew
what his intentions were from the beginning.
You knew exactly what he wanted. So I just don't
get it. I don't get that and I don't get the
zombies and I don't get... anything at this point
besides the fact that mummy wants to kill nick
jenny wants to save him and nick's worried now
because obviously jenny is going to die that's
what he is told by jake johnson i at this point
grabbed my beer and literally it was five seconds
and now they were just underwater long ago in
the news position they mentioned that it was
under the river So I'm wondering if the mummy
like opened the wall or something like that and
the river just started flowing. And basically
the zombies grab Jenny away. Nick tries to save
her. There's like 50 zombies, the mummy, and
one cursed hero. I wonder who's going to win.
Amunet has killed Jenny. Jenny is dead. Like
completely dead. I thought it was just going
to be one of those situations where like, oh,
your kiss has woken me up. It wasn't that. And
Amunet thinks she has a handle on the situation.
So, of course, she sends away the zombies. She's
feeling confident. She knows at this point. So
she's like, I'm in Nick's head. I can kill him,
he can become the god of death, and especially
because I killed his girlfriend, if he becomes
the god of death, he might be able to bring her
back so that she can live a normal life without
him, but at least live a normal life while he
just goes on this rampage and starts killing
people with Amunet as his queen. Nick's like,
no, you killed the girl I love, which I've only...
slept with for 15 seconds or whatever it is at
this point and so they get into this huge fight
she throws nick like neck first into a stone
tablet his body literally crumples in the cgi
where his neck goes across the tablet and looks
like it's probably snapped yet he lives through
it there's a bunch of scenes like that where
she just kind of like he basically does something
that would probably kill him and he survives
somehow so then he's like she's trying to convince
him if I kill you I make you this god of death
you can bring her back and he's like maybe this
is a good idea so he gets close to her and he's
like I can get the dagger I might be able to
pull this off and she licks his face I don't
know why, again, she's just so sexual. I don't
get it. I don't know why. They never explain
it. They never say, like, she needs to be sexual
to get life force or whatever. He says something
like, I don't remember the exact line, but he
said, like, I'm going to save her. And so she
throws him across the room again. There was a
wooden box coffin that he was thrown into, and
his dick literally... went into this wooden box
like it it went curved into it and he just gets
up fine but he also grabbed the dagger from her
and starts smashing the stone and she's like
no no no if you give me the dagger you'll be
the god of death you can bring him back i bring
her back do it don't don't don't leave her and
so he's like if i'm the god of death I can bring
her back on my own. So he stabs himself and kills
himself and becomes the god of death. He is set.
Like, set is the god of death. He is set. So
he's like walking close to Amunet and is like,
my love, we will control this world together.
And he sees behind her Jenny's lifeless corpse.
And all of a sudden he just starts fighting it
with willpower. But in the very Tom Cruise way
of just like, ugh! You know, very Tom Cruise
way. So he's just going to fight it with willpower.
You know, that's going to work. And he starts
seeing all these people that are telling him,
like, if you kill yourself, you'll be the greater
good. Like, you'll get uncursed. You'll be able
to destroy Amunet. And so all of a sudden he
just gets like this superhuman strength, tosses
Amunet across the room and keeps fighting her,
blah, blah, blah. And like, it's just, I'm going
to destroy you and everything like that. And
finally he gets her crumbled to the ground. He
kisses her and sucks the life out of her and
just throws her skeletal corpse away. And so
then he like rushes to Jenny and is like, Jenny,
wake up. Jenny, wake up. Like this deep voice.
And he has like these crazy teeth and it looks
like he's almost like a Leviathan or something
like that. And she wakes up and he's gone. He's
like 40 feet away. And we don't know this at
this point, but he's just gone. And she's like,
how am I alive? And he's like, good, you're alive.
And she like walks up to him, but he's in the
shadows. And so we don't know what he looks like.
We don't see what he looks like anymore, but
he sacrificed himself for her. So she's like,
oh my God, like, I'm so grateful for you, blah,
blah, blah. And he's like, I don't want to hurt
you. So I'm going to go away before Jekyll and
his crew come. And so I just kept wondering,
is he like the Wolfman? Is he Dracula? Is he
a Leviathan? Is he a mummy now? Like, we don't
know. And the line that was given as Jekyll comes
in, he goes, he found his redemption, but it
was at a great cost. He's a monster now. And
somehow he also brings Jake Johnson back to life
now. And they're in the desert back where they
started essentially. But Nick has his face wrapped
up by like turbans and stuff. So we don't know
what he is. And Jekyll just says to Jenny in
like this exposition to close the movie. Well
we may have to hunt him one day. But sometimes
it takes a monster to fight a monster. And they
put the Amunet into this mercury tomb again.
And said that he's still connected to her so
she may come back someday. And that's the end
of the movie. And that is the end of the dark
universe that they were trying to create because
it just didn't work. This movie. I don't know.
There's just points of just boring. And then
there's so much talking. It would be totally
cool if this movie was more action -packed and
everything like that. And I also don't get the
tone. Because sometimes it's super serious and
sometimes it's like the 90s mummy. which never
got too serious to outweigh the fun, which is
why I think that movie worked more. Plus, Brendan
Fraser, I think, is a better comedic actor. I
know Tom Cruise had his moments earlier on and
everything like that, and he still has some good
depth to his comedy, but Brendan Fraser was able
to balance the action and the comedy, and it
worked. And I especially think it worked for
a movie like The Mummy. If you were to put Tom
Cruise in the 90s Mummy... I don't think it would
have worked the same. So that's one of those
things that just throws me off about this movie
because sometimes it's just super serious, like
melodramatic, over -the -top drama and everything
like that. And then sometimes it's this Marvel
joking like, oh, 15 seconds of sex, blah, blah,
blah. You know, that kind of stuff. And I don't
know. It just didn't work. It just didn't. Russell
Crowe was awful. Jenny was great. She's Annabelle.
What's her last name? I want to get it right.
Annabelle Wallace. Sophia Boutella played Amunet.
And I think she just didn't have enough to do
because she was actually pretty decent for the
Egyptian at first and then the mummy for the
entirety of the movie. Tom Cruise is Tom Cruise.
He's doing stunts, which is great. He did a lot
of good stunts. This movie won a lot of awards
of Bad Movie, Worst Movie of the Year, Worst
Supporting Actor in Russell Crowe, blah, blah,
blah. All this stuff. But one of the things they
did win was Best Stunt Rigging. And I will say
some of the stunts are very well done. What you
can expect in a Tom Cruise movie. So yeah, that's
2017's The Mummy. The bad movie for this week.
Overall, it wasn't awful, but it wasn't amazing
either. I'd give it a 1 out of 5. Let's go spiders.
1 out of 5 spiders. So, yeah, it wasn't terrible,
but it's not anything special either. I do not
recommend it for anybody that's looking for a
funny -slash -action -packed movie. I think there's
a bunch of better options out there. And especially
desert themed. If you want a good desert themed.
Watch Sahara. I think it's an underrated comedy
action movie. Compared to this especially. I
think it's Citizen Kane. To this movie. But that
is 2017's The Mummy. This is Game for a Movie.
I've been your host Mike. We will hopefully have
our whole group together. Stay tuned for iStream.
Which may come out. Hopefully in two weeks, especially
if we can't get together for a Game for a Movie
episode. Like I said, that's going to be a lot
more sporadic because I'm just going to do that
when we don't have a Game for a Movie episode.
Obviously, we are trying for Game for a Movie
to be Game for a Movie. But this is under the
Game for a Movie Network umbrella. I think I'm
going to call it Game for a Network. Who knows?
I don't know at this point. I'm still making
it up as I go. But yeah. So I've been Mike with
Game for a Movie, where we ask, are you game
for a movie? We will see you next time on Game
for a Movie. Bye.