You know what that sound means? It's another
episode of Game for a Movie where we ask, are
you game for a movie? My name is Mike. I'll be
your host this evening. It is the first bad movie
of 2025. And when I tell you I have found a doozy,
I mean I have found a doozy of a film. This is
a stoner comedy in quotes there. Can't wait to
show you more about it. But of course, before
we do that, we have to start with what we are
drinking. What we are drinking tonight is one
of my favorite breweries in South Carolina. This
is from Untamed Waters Brewing. This is the Seaway
Astronaut. It is a double IPA. It is a fantastic
beer and it is one of my favorite places on the
face of the planet. I got to bring my son there
for the first time just to grab a four pack.
It's not like I was drinking there all day or
anything like that. We grabbed a four pack and
my favorite bartender was there. They have excellent
trivia there. And the trivia guy was there. They
all got to see my son for the first time. And
truthfully, it made everybody's day, including
mine. So Untamed Waters in Fort Mill, South Carolina.
It is an excellent place with excellent people
and excellent beer. I highly recommend it. And
this is the Seaway Astronaut, a double IPA. Cheers
to you guys. All right, enough about what we
are drinking. Let's talk bad movies. So as I
said before, this is a stoner comedy in big quotations
on that one. This is a movie that I chose because
this week Flight Risk comes out, which is a movie
starring Mark Wahlberg, Topher Grace, and Michelle
Dockery. And I've been trying this year to stay
a little more relevant on my topics, relatable
to what's coming out and this one is one of the
worst ones on Topher Grace's filmography this
is Don Peyote Don Peyote is a stoner comedy as
I've said before that is written directed and
starring Dan Fogler Dan Fogler, you definitely
recognize. He is Kowalski, the human partner
in the Fantastic Beasts movie, as well as he
was Randy Daytona in Balls of Fury, which is
a highly underrated, I would also call it a stoner
comedy on that one. That one's definitely a lot
of fun. It's the movie about ping pong and Randy
Daytona is played by Dan Fogler. Don Peyote,
let's get into a couple details of that before
we go into the main details. You can find this
film on Tubi, Pluto TV for free, or if you really
feel the need, you can rent it on Hoopla through
your local library. I don't know why you would
use one of your valuable rents on that one, but,
you know, you do you. This movie is a 7 % critics
rating as well as a 29 % audience rating on Rotten
Tomatoes. So it does fall under the 40 -40 of
making it a bad movie. And one of the critics
ratings, yeah, it says from 2014 where this movie
was released, it says this is the worst American
movie I have seen this year. So you know we're
in for a good time. It is an hour and a half
long, and it released on May 16, 2014. I can't
find very much info about its budget or anything
like that, but I can tell you right now, it is
an indie movie. I can also tell you that it probably
didn't make its money back. Who knows? Maybe
it did, but I would guess not. Along with Dan
Fogler, there is a bunch of people in this movie
that... you definitely recognize and they usually
uh they get their two minutes of movie time and
then they're gone and they're out of the film
so i will mention some very big names in this
project and you'll be like how'd they end up
in this um yeah they're in the movie for two
minutes they disappear they're gone for the rest
of the film that's just how it's going to go
with this movie so uh let me give you a brief
synopsis before i read my details of this movie.
I'm going to, as always, read you every last
detail of what happens in this movie and then
tell you my thoughts on it at the end. But the
brief synopsis, Don Peyote tells the story of
Warren Allman, an unemployed stoner who finally
finds a purpose in life after an unpleasant encounter
with a homeless man preaching the end is near.
Fueled by vivid apocalyptic dreams, Warren becomes
obsessed with 2012 doomsday theories and decides
to make a documentary on the subject while his
fiance is busy planning their wedding. Yeah,
that's a good description of what to expect from
this one. It did come out in 2014, but it is
dealing with a lot of the 2012 doomsday conspiracy
theories. It does also go down the rabbit hole
on many other things. There's going to be some
real life things that are mentioned in this.
Can't wait to tell you all of the details about
this movie. So here we go. Don Peyote. Here is
everything about it. And before I really start,
I just want to let you know that some of this
stuff might not make sense. Trust me, it didn't
make sense while I was watching it. So I'm going
to try to do the best I can to make it make sense.
There's a chance that some of it is still going
to be confusing. And it's mostly because it's
still confusing to me. Trust me. So here we go.
I will start by saying there is a narrator that
I thought was just in the beginning of the movie
to introduce a character. No, he does not go
away. He is there the entire length of the movie.
So there is a narrator in this film. You just
got to get over it. He introduces us to Warren,
our main character played by Nan Fogler, who
is an unemployed graphic novel artist. He's also
Jewish, engaged, and he smokes pot most of the
time through fruits. So he makes bongs out of
things like apples, pomegranates, grapefruit
at one point. Yeah, it's a lot of fruit bongs.
The narrator lets us know there is nothing remarkable
about him except for his dreams. And we get a
first example of that when he wakes up, quotes,
from a dream, walks to the window of his like
20th floor apartment in this New York building.
He sees like two suns setting and then all of
a sudden he sees a huge tidal wave that crashes
through his window and knocks him over. Yeah,
that is the kind of dreams we're dealing with.
And this tidal wave is terrible CGI, like absolutely
awful. That's why I think this budget is so low
on this film. I've said at this point that this
looks kind of like a student film project, which
is not a bad thing. When you are a student film
project, but when you are a Hollywood movie that
has a lot of big names and everything like that,
that's not good. So this definitely looks like
a student film project, and I don't mean that
in a good way. We get introduced to Karen. Karen
is the engaged woman to Warren. She is played
by Kelly Hutchinson. who has been in a couple
of things. Maybe you'd recognize her from some
things, but mostly now she's a writer, including
she wrote 22 episodes of Dead to Me, the TV series.
So that's kind of where she is right now. A few
things about Karen. I think we're not supposed
to like her. I think that's what the goal was
trying to be, that we weren't going to like her.
And truthfully... I find that a little ridiculous.
This first thing is definitely a little unreasonable.
But after that, everything else is kind of very
reasonable that she deals with. I think they're
trying to drive home that maybe she's a little
more impulsive. I don't know. Maybe that's the
idea behind it. But I do not hate this character.
I think they try to make it so you do. I don't
hate Karen. I think she has a lot of reasonable
things that she's trying to do throughout this
film. The unreasonable thing that starts at the
beginning, though, she wakes Warren up from this
dream of the big tidal wave, the big bad CGI
tidal wave by trying to put a baby in her. And
that's the thing is her biological clock is ticking.
So she wants to not only get married, but she
also wants to have a kid like right away. That's
kind of our intro to the character is that kind
of stuff. The other thing, though, that she does
is she really wants to help Warren be the best
he can be. So she does things like leave post
-it notes around his computer to try to encourage
him to express himself, use his creativity he
has, and to look for work and that kind of stuff.
She really wants to distract him from not smoking
all day and not watching conspiracy theory YouTube
videos, especially ones about 2012 and the doomsday
of 2012. One of these days, Warren is heading
to a party and it just so happens to be raining.
He crosses the street of this busy New York street.
And there's a homeless guy, a doomsday hobo,
as I call him, that has a sign that says the
end is near. And he accidentally knocks Warren
over. And when reaching to like help him up,
a piece of like a water droplet falls off of
this homeless guy and lands on Warren's bare
skin. And then it does the CGI thing that's kind
of like a virus spread where you see it kind
of just like spread out kind of thing. And this
is where our events start. Basically, now Warren
is kind of going off the deep end with his conspiracy
theories. And this is the reason it all starts.
He thinks that he's been infected with something
almost. It doesn't help the party he goes to
at this place called The Whip, of all places.
Warren's friend invites him to this party. His
name is Balance. Balance is not at this party.
So Warren starts making friends with the people
there. start doing all these drugs like wolfsbane
and other things he's high off his ass for some
reason he has a red clown nose at some point
and they kind of are talking about this guy pinchbeck
pinchbeck is an author who has all this information
about doomsday and especially about 2012's doomsday
pinchbeck is actually a real person and he plays
himself in this movie and Warren leaves his party
and starts to go to his YouTube channel and watches
all the things that he's talking about and everything
like that. And then he goes to sleep with this
still fresh in his mind. So one of the things
about this movie is there's dream sequences and
we don't know completely when it's a dream sequence
versus real. Some of them are very realistic.
Some of them are completely crazy. This one here,
I think, is a dream. But I don't know. It feels
realistic in nature, like it could be certainly.
But at the same time, the character that meets
Warren in this part is called a dream agent and
is played by Anne Hathaway. Fun fact about Anne
Hathaway in this film, according to the trivia
on the IMDb page, Dan Fogler said she lost a
bet and had to be in this movie. So she plays
the dream agent. who knocks on the door and basically
says, like, you fucked up, Warren, headbutts
him, and, like, beats the shit out of him. Then
she realizes she's got the wrong guy, and they're
just, like, chilling after that. And she is a
black ops agent who knows all this stuff about
the government and, like, the fact that they're
lying to us and what they're keeping from us
and everything like that. And it goes to this
kind of montage where... Half of it is like a
Charlie Brown parents and the other half is like
certain words. So it'd be like, wah, wah, wah,
wah, wah, wah. Chemtrails in the air. Wah, wah,
wah, wah, wah, wah. 2012 doomsday. Wah, wah,
wah, wah, wah. That kind of stuff where you hear
certain words that get us to believe he's learning
about all these things through this dream agent
that knows because she's a black ops agent. The
thing is, Warren is kind of not getting it exactly.
Anne Hathaway puts their heads together and he
kind of through osmosis learns all this stuff.
So now he knows all this stuff to be true. And
he thinks he can do something about especially
Doomsday. But all of these things he's now learned
about. And one of the things he feels like he
can do to help out is he had a text message from
Pinchbeck. And so he kind of schedules a time
to meet with him. He also has a text from Karen
about going dress shopping, which I don't know
very many people that do that with their fiance.
But I mean, good for you if that's what you want
to do. I know that my fiance at that time didn't
want to have me there. She wanted to do it with
like girls hanging out, getting some drinks,
wine, that kind of stuff, trying on different
dresses and surprising me at the wedding itself.
But maybe we're traditionalists that way. When
Warren gets to the dress shop, all of a sudden
he starts hearing noises like bird sounds, lion
roars, that kind of thing. He's not really focused
on the guy that's talking to him, asking him
if he's like ready for the wedding. And he goes
walking down like the aisle of dresses and calls
Balance. Balance is his friend that didn't show
up to the party. When Balance answers, Balance
is like half naked and he's shaving his legs
in the shower. Warren has this idea. He wants
to borrow Balance's video camera and he wants
to make a documentary about 2012 and Doomsday.
So he wants to tape this interview with Pinchback.
That's originally how he wants to start it. Then
he wants to get more opinions and kind of he
wants all this information so that he knows what
to do about Doomsday itself. So he interviews
Pinchback. It's a great interview. We don't get
much of it, but we get a little bit here or there.
And now he knows that he's connected somehow
to this and he's going to save the world. Like
he's that guy. He knows now he's been brought
into this world because he's going to make a
difference and stop Doomsday. One of the people
he also meets is Bates. Bates is played by Jay
Beruchel. Jay Beruchel was in the Goon movies.
He's in She's Out of My League. The big thing
that a lot of people would know him from is he
voices Hiccup in the How to Train Your Dragon
movies. Jay Burchell is the drug dealer of Balance.
And he also knows a lot about this 2012 stuff.
And so they interview him next. He's a perfect
candidate. Let's interview him. Let's get as
many interviews as we can get. And he kind of
turns them on the way of like the rich versus
the poor. Like the poor has all this stuff happen
to them. because the rich decide it and hide
this information from them. Warren has to go
to, I call it premarital counseling. I don't
know what to really call it, but he has to go
to premarital counseling with Karen. So he sends
Balance in his place to go to the Occupy Wall
Street movement. So Balance is just there, like
taking video of everything, talking to the people
there. It's going to go in this documentary.
Warren, this premarital counseling. So we went
through this when we were getting married. I
truthfully think it's something that everybody
should kind of do. At the very least, it's a
time where the officiant gets to know you guys
a little better, like to make the actual ceremony
about you and have this background and everything
like that. At the very least, or that's at the
very least, at the most, one of the things that
I thought was very cool about it is Claire and
I are very open. like about conversations everything
like that we've always been very open with each
other we've always there's no topic off limits
but this got us thinking about certain things
that we didn't plan for and like how we would
kind of like handle it together and we like i
said we're very open everything like that but
hearing each other out and coming up with these
solutions together is very eye -opening um Because
we didn't live in Cincinnati and our officiant
was in Cincinnati, we only did one of these sessions.
She really wanted us to do three, just didn't
work out. I would have gladly done all three
because like I said, I think this is a great
thing. That's kind of what the idea is. So the
co -officiants are talking with Warren and Karen
and kind of getting their sides of how they would
handle certain things. It's become very obvious
that Warren is kind of like checked out. And
so they ask him what he's thinking and what's
got him all distracted. And he brings up all
these conspiracy theories and like all these
reasons why he thinks he's going to save the
world and he's going to make a difference. And
Karen's kind of like trying to like downplay
that and get them focused on their wedding again.
But Warren doesn't want to hear this. He feels
like he's not being listened to. when truthfully
he probably isn't doing the listening if you
ask me uh but he feels like he's not being listened
to and karen is just trying to get them to have
this like great wedding it's not like she's not
listening to him she actually encouraged him
originally with the with the creative process
to do this documentary to like put his talents
into something so With him not feeling listened
to and with all of these things that he's putting
on himself, he's starting to not feel well. And
he uses a ton of money to go to a bunch of different
doctors and basically find out what's wrong with
him. There's also at this point a supercut of
him talking to experts about the occult cults.
2012 all the conspiracy theories that kind of
thing and one of the things that stands out is
this idea of homo sanctus homo sanctus is a man
involving into a spirit man or a holy man that's
going to lead us basically and so this leads
to a scene where warren is in the bathroom and
he's talking to the mirror going basically he's
saying to himself like Are you homo sanctus?
Like, are you the spirit warrior? And Karen is
outside the bathroom kind of listening in. And
then he takes her lipstick and, like, puts these
markings on his face. And it's just kind of like,
I am homo sanctus. I am a spirit warrior, you
know. And Karen's kind of, okay, what's going
on? You know, like, what's happening? And Warren
admits that he. has been having health issues
and is kind of getting bad advice from certain
things, but he's found this different path kind
of thing. He also admits that he spent all of
their honeymoon money to go to all these doctors.
And she handles it a lot better than I probably
would have. She's just kind of like, okay, you
need to talk to somebody again. You need to get
psychiatric help. And so she convinces him to
go to the therapist, Dr. Fieldman. Dr. Fieldman
is played by Wallace Shawn. Wallace Shawn has
been in a ton of shit. You definitely recognize
him from one role and one role only. You probably
have seen him in other things, but definitely
one role and one role only. In The Princess Bride,
he is the inconceivable guy. So this is the guy
that Warren goes to talk to again. He explains
to the doctor that the vivid dreams are back
and that he is dealing with this idea of greater
purpose. Like he has this purpose now in his
life, which Dr. Fieldman is kind of like, okay,
you have these delusions of grandeur again. We
were dealing with this last time, but Warren
knows that he is bigger than this. Like he has
this purpose that is bigger than this idea of
grandeur and everything. So he doesn't need this.
He walks out. And. He also has it in his mind
now that he is going to be lied to. He's going
to be hurt by all these people that want to stand
in the way of him becoming homo sanctus. So he
decides to take some self -defense lessons. He
also gets a gun from Dean Winters. Dean Winters
is the name of the actor. Dean Winters is the
vulture in Brooklyn Nine -Nine. Nine -Nine? And
he's also the mayhem guy from Allstate. So you
definitely know him as well. He's there for all
of five seconds. Like I said, all of these characters,
Anne Hathaway, Jay Baruchel, Wallace Shawn, Dean
Winters, they're all in this scenes for like
two minutes and then they're gone again. So you
get all these big names, but then they just kind
of are gone. So now he has a gun and he also
kind of knows self -defense. Kind of. You'll
see that it doesn't really work. And so after
accumulating all this information, he's like
talking with himself. And this is all we get
from the narrator. Cause again, this is narrators.
He's just making sure that you get everything
explained to you. Like it's, it's fed to you
on a spoon yet. It's still the most confusing
movie by far. Um, basically he realizes after
all this information, he needs Karen with him.
And he wants to like reconnect with her and get
to the point of the wedding and everything like
that. So he buys her some flowers. He goes home.
He's going to like take her out on this date.
He's going to take her for a night on the town.
And when he gets home, there's a party happening
in his house and not just a party, but an orgy
like half naked people everywhere, including
when he gets to the bedroom. Karen is basically.
to put it in the best way I can having a train
run on her pretty much. And like, you don't see
anything or anything like that. It's just like
three or four guys that are surrounding her.
The idea is that she was kind of like living
life to the fullest because basically he said
the world was ending anyway. So she was just
kind of like living life. she's seizing the day
because that's what warren told her to do she's
seizing the day because that's what warren told
her to do and so now he's like heartbroken and
he is just he doesn't know what to do with himself
he is beside himself so he pulls out the gun
and shoots one of the guys right in the chest
and that guy gone done and then he grabs the
gun and puts it in his mouth And it's just like,
I'm not going to live on this planet anymore
if you're cheating on me, that kind of thing.
And pulls the trigger. There we go. End of movie.
Warren's killed himself, right? So I guess our
homo sanctus never happens. That's it. That's
the end of the movie. But it's not, of course.
Turns out it was all a dream, which we didn't
know in the moment. Because, again, they don't
clarify when it's dreams or... real or whatever
and like this one yes of course it feels a little
off it feels a little weird especially because
it goes against everything karen was doing this
entire process in the movie so far so it does
feel off and she comes out of the shower wearing
a robe her hair still wet like warren is still
seeing all these people in this party but now
she's in a robe with her hair wet like no makeup
on kind of like worry what's going on what's
happening and he like Pulls the gun out of his
mouth and it's just his fingers. And now he knows
he's kind of like starting to go crazy. So he
starts laughing and I mean sinister laughing,
like just crazy laughing. And it's like laughing
guttural noises and his glasses crack. And so
he like takes his glasses off, hands them to
Karen. And then he passes out. I think it's very
important to mention at this point. This is where
I stopped for the first time. So I split this
in two days. And this was really right about
halfway anyway. But it's just going to make it
crazier when I start it back up. Because after
he passed out, he now wakes up and he's underwater
again. Like he's floating and he's underwater.
and he gets out of the water and he's over by
the bridge and all of a sudden this musical number
starts up and he's like dancing and singing with
random people off the streets like it's just
okay cool we're just dancing and singing now
and then it transitions into the desert and he's
all alone in the desert and like this is a very
fake desert like it's obvious green screen that
kind of stuff and there's two versions of him
one wearing like an Indian headdress and then
another one And they talk to him and they're
just like, when I flop around, it's like I'm
on peyote. And I'm just like, there's your roll
credits right there. But he's being chased by
these two versions of himself in this drug -induced
trip. And I said this is kind of like a vision
quest so that he can figure it out and find out
that he's the one. It's not a vision quest, at
least not at this point, because he ends up in
a homeless encampment. And not just any homeless
encampment. There's a bunch of homeless people,
but there is our doomsday hobo. And our doomsday
hobo starts going like, oh, it's Warren the one.
He has the mark. All hail homo sanctus. And like
all of them start going like, all hail homo sanctus.
All hail homo sanctus. And they get to him and
they reach their fingers like down his throat
and they pull out a coin. And we don't know what
this coin is. It's just a coin. And they make
him put it into this fortune teller machine,
like one of those ones that is featured in the
movie Big. So like he puts it in the machine
and this guy spins around and it's a real guy.
It's not like the fortune teller. And he tells
him that he needs to go visit this guy. And I
can't remember what the guy's name is, but they
need him to go visit this guy. So they all push
him through like this like tent door. And there's
a guy with this deep voice and some scantily
clad women. And like these women are like touching
Warren, feeling him up while deep voice guys
talking to him. And he's talking about old time
religion like Aries, Kali, Shiva. He mentions
how if Warren wants to be homo sanctus, he has
to go to Punta Maldonado to meet the maestro
and take ayahuasca to be complete. So that's
the plan. He needs to go to Punta Maldonado to
meet the maestro, take ayahuasca, and he will
be homo sanctus. That is the idea behind this
deep voice guy talking to him. And finally, the
drug trip ends and it kind of zooms out. Warren.
Is like staring blankly. He's got a band -aid
under his eye. He's holding two fingers up in
the air. That have like braces on them. We don't
know what happened to him. Like how he got hurt.
But he's in a psych ward. And he's being seen
by a doctor. Who's like talking to him. And basically
the doctor's like. I want to see you more. And
then the doctor gets sat down in a wheelchair.
Because he's a patient. And he gets rolled away.
And on the other side of the door of the psych
ward is Karen, who's observing him and like saying,
it's just gotten so much worse, doctor. Like,
I don't know what's happened to him. I don't
know what's happened to my worry. That kind of
thing. And then Warren and Karen are talking
in another room at a table. They're talking together.
And basically, Karen announces the wedding's
off and gives him back the ring. And at first,
he's like super pissed, like super pissed. He
can't believe this because now he knows. He knows
what he needs to do. He needs to go to Punta
Maldonado, talk to the maestro, do ayahuasca,
and become a homo sanctus. And then he just starts
talking about peace and that he's going to save
everyone from 12 -21 -2012. And like as she's
like getting up to leave, he smiles at her and
is just like, don't say I didn't warn you. God
damn it. That was so bad. Like that's just such
a bad joke. And that's the kind of humor they
were including in this comedy. Yeah, it's bad.
So he's kind of like distraught about everything,
but he knows he knows that like once he becomes
homo sanctus, he can go back and save her. so
now he's like in his room he's on some kind of
drug to help him sleep and relax and that kind
of stuff but he also tries to escape tonight's
the night he's going to escape so he's like slow
walking down the hallway he's falling and he
sees that somebody is in a room uh by themselves
and he's like looking for help to get out and
he thinks this person is going to help him this
person is smoking in a gas mask in the medical
ward and it happens to be speed his buddy that
he used to sell to speed is played by speed levitch
um i don't know him from a lot of things but
i do know him from one thing i used to watch
this show religiously it was called stroker and
hoop and he is the voice of hoop on that show
it's an animated show it was a cop thing detective
thing It was hysterical. It was ridiculous. It
was on Adult Swim. I was young. I still enjoy
it, but yeah, it's a lot. So he is the voice
of Hoop on that. That's how I would know him.
And basically, Speed hooks him up with some weed
and they get blazed. He also admits that it is
past the 2012 doomsday. So we've been this entire
movie. Been following this guy who thinks he's
going to save everybody from this doomsday. And
it's already past this date. So I don't know
what is going to happen now. Because this documentary
never happened. It's past the date he was going
to save everybody. But Speed helps him, gives
him a key so that he can escape. And as he is
escaping through this fire escape, Balance is
there to help him escape as well. And it just
so happens he's there. So as they're going to
balance his car, there's like sirens. There's
people showing up like guards and everything.
And balance is going to take care of them because
Warren now sees the camera and is like, oh, yeah,
you think this is funny? Yeah, this isn't funny.
This is real life. This is really what I'm going
through. And he's like talking directly to the
audience. And it is the strangest thing because
it just all of a sudden out of nowhere has this
fourth wall break. And it's not just any fourth
wall break because then we see Glavin Culpepper.
Glavin Culpepper is played by Topher Grace. Hello,
Topher. We've been waiting for you. He is Dan
Fogler's agent. And basically he's just talking
about the fact that he doesn't understand what's
happening in this movie. He's like watching the
movie and he's like. dan wanted to do this indie
shit and he wrote it himself in his directing
so there's no one to blame but himself so and
that's topher grace's part pretty much and he
like goes on this rant about it's hard to be
his agent but you know he has no one to blame
but himself so yeah then we go back to the actual
action of the movie warren is told by balance
that he's been in the psych ward for three months
and he is not okay because It's been three months.
He had no clue. He thinks it's been days at most.
So they hop in a cab and balance happens to bring
his camera and his editing stuff. And he shows
the documentary that he has edited. And he's
like, this is great. Like, this is really good,
but we need something big to close it out. Something
big to close out this documentary. And Warren
goes, perfect. I've got it. We need to go to
Punta Maldonado. Because I need to meet this
guy named the maestro. And all of a sudden, Warren
is in a hospital gown in a different cab. There's
no balance. And the cab driver has woken him
up to tell him he's at Point Maldonado. Warren's
in this hospital gown. He has no money. He has
no anything. He's wondering where his friend
is. He's confused again. And so he gets into
a fight with the cabbie. And the cabbie knocks
him the fuck out. Just like punches him, knocks
him the fuck out. So he wakes up and he finds
this close restaurant and he's going to ask where
to find the maestro or where to find a phone
or whatever. But everybody there is speaking
Italian and he doesn't understand any of it.
And then there's this news report in English,
mind you. It's not even in Italian. It's in English
at this restaurant. about the fact that they're
looking for warren because he escaped from the
hospital and like the chef comes out of the kitchen
and he has like a knife in his hand and he's
just like yelling at him to get out of there
and it scares warren off however it's played
for laughs because it's one of those jokes where
this guy understood he's looking for a phone
he just so happened to be washing this knife
and he has it in his hands and he's telling warren
that it's outside around the corner So outside
around the corner, outside around the corner,
like he's yelling at him and it freaks Warren
out. Well, Warren goes, he steals some clothes
from a person. He tries to call Karen, but nothing
happens. He breaks down crying. He's alone. He's
at his lowest point. You know, he thought he
was just going to meet the maestro. He was going
to take the ayahuasca and he was going to be
homo sanctus. So he starts walking down these
train tracks and he finds a ticket office. And
he's really excited because now he knows he can
get a ticket. He can end up back in New York
and he can just go back with his life. I think
this is the point. They don't ever address this,
but I think this is the point where he's kind
of like, okay, I'm not being the maestro. I'm
not having this happen. I'm going to get back
to Karen and I'm going to live my life. And so
he asks when the next train goes to New York
and the conductor is just like, you do realize
this is a museum train. Like this goes nowhere.
What you could do is you can go over the mountains
and go to Phoenicia to get a bus over the mountain.
And so Warren sets off to go over the mountain.
Along his route, he sees this camp. He thinks
there's somebody there that can help him because
he's hungry. He's starting to lose it. Nobody's
there. There's no food there. There's nothing.
It's just this campsite that was left. And so
he sits against a tree and somebody starts yelling
at him that he shouldn't be on the ground. He
shouldn't be there. He should get up the tree
because bears could come or whatever. And the
two people hop down from the tree because he's
not moving. And these two people are Adam and
Eve. They are two hippies, for lack of a better
term. they're free spirits they kind of they
go where they want to they're not held back by
anything so they're just kind of uh they do what
they want they find what they want when they
need it everything like that uh eve is played
by elizabeth harn harnois uh it's either harnois
or harnois if you it's french i don't know i
think it's harnois um elizabeth harnois She's
been in a couple things here and there. A lot,
a lot, a lot, a lot of Christmas movies lately.
But she was in CSI for 85 episodes as Lab Tech
Morgan Brody. That's probably the one thing you'd
recognize her from. And then Adam is played by
Josh Duhamel. Why Josh Duhamel? I have no clue,
but he's there. And so there... Saying to Warren
they can help him. They're going to get him some
food and then they'll get him across the mountain
to Phoenicia. Basically, they're trying to figure
out what to get for food. And Adam says to Eve,
I'm feeling Italian. So they go and they find
a dumpster and they start rummaging through it
and they find some good stuff. And Warren's like,
no, I'm not eating that. I'm not eating from
the dumpster. And he says to them, I guess beggars
can be choosers. Yeah, that's that's the jokes,
though. That's what we got here. So they're walking
back after eating and they end up in this little
like tiny train car. It's kind of their setup.
It's kind of where they hang out when it's like
raining or whatever. So Adam and Eve on one side,
Warren on the other. And Eve gives Warren a drink.
It's a tea drink. And as it turns out, the tea
is the ayahuasca. But they don't know the maestro.
They have no clue who the maestro is. so once
again he starts laughing maniacally because you
know now he's high on ayahuasca and he also was
like caught off guard and the fact that they
didn't give him a warning it was ayahuasca but
they they're like ah he's cool it's fine so they
tell him what their plan is they want to dump
100 gallons of ayahuasca into the water supply
And basically everybody will have this high moment
and they'll realize that the free spirit life
is the life you should choose and that kind of
stuff. Warren hears none of this because, again,
he is high off his ass. So when he wakes up,
again, this is another dream I'm thinking. I
would assume so because when you hear what's
happening, you'll think it is too. He wakes up
and he starts seeing like every dimension. and
there's this goddess there and the goddess has
been waiting for him and says finally you are
awake don peyote and there's the roll credits
so she calls him don peyote he has now gone to
this next level in his mind and then he really
wakes up and he's on a train track and his friends
are nowhere to be seen but he has seemingly transformed
into don peyote So he goes to a buffet to eat
and it just so happens that also there is deep
voice guy and deep voice guy. He explains to
our, our friend Don peyote explains to him that
he has not met the maestro, but he did take the
ayahuasca. And so he has completed his transformation,
right? While this is happening, all of a sudden
this like creepy bunny suit guy is like running
around and Warren goes and chases after him.
And in the bunny suit, when he finally catches
it, it's Balance. Balance has been running from
something. He says, I've been being chased by
the CIA, the FBI, KFC. Everybody's after me,
man. And so Balance is trying to escape and run
away. But he gives Warren a metal hat to protect
his thoughts. And he also gives him 500 copies
of the documentary. and then he leaps that's
it balance is gone for the rest of the movie
by the way this is that's it so now it's up to
warren so warren is like kind of in this enlightened
phase you know he thinks he's now don peyote
he thinks he's homo sanctus and so there's four
guys in the restaurant and he kind of is like
talking with them about saving them from doomsday
and basically one of the guys is like mad at
him he's like getting into a fight with him and
warren yells at him just like i am done peyote
and the guy's just like i don't fucking care
who you are punches him knocks him out this ends
the cycle of violence and self -hatred according
to the narrator so he was at absolute rock bottom
But now there's no more doubts. He no longer
has a self -hatred. He no longer fear. He no
longer wants to commit violence. He is Don Peyote
now. And so as he's bleeding, he goes to the
bathroom and he covers himself in the blood with
like these markings like he did with the lipstick
earlier. And all that is left is Don Peyote.
So now he walks around the world. He's got this.
peaceful message he's got a sign saying the end
is near let me save you kind of thing he performed
like several miracles while he was doing this
including one where he like makes a coin appear
from behind this girl's ear and then another
one and then another one and it's not stopping
and now he's freaking out because he didn't mean
to do this so he disappears for seven years yes
you heard me correct he just disappears for seven
years because he kept making coins appear from
behind this girl's ear But he has a full beard
and he carries the sign of peace and he passes
out his DVDs and he ends up at a cafe. And at
this cafe is Karen with this new man and a new
son named Grady. And they happen to be talking
about Grady and how Grady is like this free spirited
kind of kid. And he's like in tune with the flowers
and everything like that. And Grady gives Warren
a flower. And Warren, because he also wants to
give Grady a gift. gives Karen's ring back to
him and to give to Karen. They don't recognize
him. Karen doesn't recognize him at all because
now he's got a beard, I guess. And the new guy
in her life kind of also lets it slip that Grady's
kind of special and they know what his genes
are. So it's very much insinuated that Grady
is Warren's kid. So Warren smiles and walks away.
And then another dance number with random people
off the street starts up. And we don't know,
again, is this a dream? Is this real? Is the
ayahuasca in the water supply? We don't know.
But that's how the movie ends. And it goes to
the credits. And not long into the credits, we
get Topher Grace's agent, Glavin Culpepper, back.
And basically, he's just talking about the fact
that... Dan wants to do these indie movies, but
like I can get him a job on Battleship 2 and
I can get him all these public ones and everything
like that. And then he admits when he calls Dan,
oh, love the movie. And then it rolls the rest
of the credits. And that's Don Peyote. What the
actual fuck was this movie? This is the strangest
movie I've ever seen. And I watched it all because
of Topher Grace. And he was a total of maybe
three minutes in this movie. Dan Fogler is a
good actor. This is the strangest thing I think
I've ever seen. And it's just such a weird movie.
And he's exactly right. Nobody to blame but himself.
He wrote it. He directed. He starred in it. So
like there's nobody to blame but him. So I don't
know. It's the strangest thing. And it goes to
my point of this episode about like people directing
themselves. Sometimes it goes so well and sometimes
it goes so wrong. Truthfully, I think this went
okay in the fact that Dan acted the shit out
of this. But he acted the shit out of the strangest
movie. So like nobody, I don't know. I think
he actually directed himself pretty well. Because
he wrote it, because he starred in it, he also
went in full send on this. And that's probably
one of the reasons why I say he nailed the acting
part of it. I don't get it. I don't follow it.
I think he did well for this writing. But I'll
say that this movie was trash in the fact that
the writing makes no goddamn sense. It was just
a bunch of stuff happening and all of a sudden
it was just, oh, it's three months later and
you had no clue you were in a psych ward. Oh,
you ended up in another cab and now you're at
Punta Maldonado, which apparently is in Italy,
but maybe it's not. And you can take a train
or a bus to get back to New York. I don't know
where the fuck you are. Um, in fact, it felt
originally because of the driver of the cab,
like it might be in like Jamaica or something
like that, but no, it apparently is close enough
that you could get a bus or a train to New York
again. It's the strangest thing. I don't know
this, this movie at the end of the day, I come
back to it going. why the fuck was this made?
Like, why the hell, what story is it trying to
tell? Because there is none. There really is
none. There's no story that makes sense with
this. It's not trying to teach you anything.
Originally, when they were going with the 2012
Doomsday thing, okay, great, that's fine. I mean,
it's a strange way to get there, and maybe somehow,
some way, he saves them all at the end. That's
what I was thinking. But then halfway through
the movie, he finds out in the psych ward that
it's already past the doomsday date. Then why
did we focus on that for the first half of the
movie? Why was that such a big deal, the 2012
doomsday shit? I don't get it. It doesn't make
sense. So it's like they had 16 different ideas
and they just went for all of them. Like they
didn't try to narrow it down or make it like
this coherent plot. They just said, OK, let's
throw it all at the wall and see what sticks.
But everything's stuck. And so we're going to
make sure we hit every last bit of it. And so
at the end of this movie, I'm sitting there feeling
like the Charlie Day meme from Always Sunny,
where he's like pointing at the board saying,
you know, that kind of stuff. Like, I feel that
that's how I felt at the end of this movie. I
was completely sober and I felt high. Like, it
does not make sense. And it definitely was, Dan
was high when he made this movie, when he wrote
this movie. It was crazy. It's insane. I guess
I got to give a rating to this shit. It's low.
It's very low on my list. And so I feel like
I'm going to give it something that a lot of
movies have had. but I want it to be different
somehow you know like I I feel like I've given
a lot of movies 0 .25 this one is on the lower
end of the 0 .25 as uh as versus something else
that was on the higher end of 0 .25 like they
both have the same rating but this one's definitely
lower does that make sense somehow I don't know
if it does it doesn't necessarily make sense
to me but neither do this movie so you know there
you go um I'm gonna say 0 .25 out of five ayahuasca
gallons in the water supply I don't know that
makes sense sure all of these celebrities that
were in it I don't understand what was in it
for them it's not even like you got a paycheck
out of it I don't think or at least not a good
one probably because this movie definitely didn't
make any money so It doesn't make sense to me
why you'd even be in this. The only one that
makes sense to me is that Anne Hathaway lost
a bet and had to be in it. Yeah, that follows.
That tracks. I totally see how you got there.
And truthfully, of the characters, her and probably
Josh Duhamel and... Josh Duhamel and Elizabeth
Harnoy, they probably had the best characters
out of them all. So if you had to be in, I guess
it's fine to be those characters because you
get... Three minutes of screen time, it's like
maybe one day of filming. Not even. So, you know,
those are probably the easiest characters where
it's like, cool, just show up, be there, do your
part, and you're done. Works for me. So even
though Anne Hathaway was all of three minutes
and lost a bet to have to be in it, I'm guessing
she was okay with it because it literally was
a day and she probably got paid for it. Yeah,
this is... This is a very strange movie. Very,
very strange movie. It's an interesting start
to 2025. This is how it's going to go. We're
due for a weird year. I've planned out the entire
year. This is the first, obviously, of the bad
movies. Next one is going to be a bad romantic
comedy. I'm going to give you that a heads up
now. So if you're playing along on our podcast
guessing game. Yeah, you already know that it's
going to start with the romantic comedy. I can
tell you it's one of the worst ones. If you go
to Rotten Tomatoes and look at the worst romantic
comedies of all time, there's a list of 30 movies.
I can give you it's one of those. So yeah, I'm
giving you a heads up now. So if you're listening
to the episode and you got to here, congratulations.
You are already a step ahead for getting a shout
out in the next episode. Very strange start to
the year. That's all I can say about this one.
Dan Fogler, you deserve better, but you also
did this to yourself. All the people in this,
majority of these actors are better than they
deserved in this movie. Yeah, that's a film.
That's a film that happened. And I don't know
where it falls on my list of the worst movies,
but I definitely say it's bottom five. Like,
I think this is... bottom five worst movies i
have seen i don't know if i can give it number
one now that i've actually sat and digested a
little bit i know some people i've told yeah
this might be the worst one now that i've sat
and digested a little bit and more specifically
thought about when it was a dream versus when
it wasn't a dream i feel a little better about
it it's still not good but i feel a little better
about it so yeah that's uh that's don peyote
so Thank you guys for tuning in to the Game for
a Movie podcast where we ask, are you game for
a movie? I've been your host, Mike, with Don
Peyote, and I will see you next time for a bad
romantic comedy. See you then.