WEBVTT 00:00:04.620 --> 00:00:06.059 You know what that sound means? It's another 00:00:06.059 --> 00:00:08.460 episode of Game for a Movie where we ask, are 00:00:08.460 --> 00:00:11.419 you game for a movie? It is a bad movie episode. 00:00:11.519 --> 00:00:13.960 I am Mike, your host. I am joined by no one. 00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:17.219 That's okay. But we have a bad movie just in 00:00:17.219 --> 00:00:19.379 time for the holidays for you. This is actually 00:00:19.379 --> 00:00:21.839 only the third bad Christmas movie that we've 00:00:21.839 --> 00:00:25.140 actually done on this podcast. But of course, 00:00:25.160 --> 00:00:26.920 first we have to jump into the important stuff 00:00:26.920 --> 00:00:29.640 like what are we drinking? Today from Legion 00:00:29.640 --> 00:00:31.839 Brewing, I've got their gold medal winner. It 00:00:31.839 --> 00:00:35.399 is called Hop Chiller and it is a cold IPA. Of 00:00:35.399 --> 00:00:38.219 course, you don't want to drink these warm. So 00:00:38.219 --> 00:00:40.259 I'm going to have my first sip now while it is 00:00:40.259 --> 00:00:48.700 ice cold. That's actually pretty solid. I do 00:00:48.700 --> 00:00:52.219 like that a lot. So that is Hop Chiller from 00:00:52.219 --> 00:00:54.600 Legion Brewing. One of my favorites here in North 00:00:54.600 --> 00:00:57.119 Carolina since we moved here. I recommend it 00:00:57.119 --> 00:00:59.609 for you. I hope you are all having a wonderful 00:00:59.609 --> 00:01:02.270 holiday season. Obviously, this is a bad Christmas 00:01:02.270 --> 00:01:04.030 movie that is coming up that we're going to talk 00:01:04.030 --> 00:01:06.370 about in a little bit. But as I'm recording this, 00:01:06.450 --> 00:01:08.689 it is the seventh night of Hanukkah, and when 00:01:08.689 --> 00:01:10.290 I release it, it will be the eighth night of 00:01:10.290 --> 00:01:12.909 Hanukkah. I hope you are having a wonderful Hanukkah 00:01:12.909 --> 00:01:16.569 if you celebrate. And if you celebrate Christmas, 00:01:16.709 --> 00:01:18.409 I hope you have a wonderful Christmas as well. 00:01:18.870 --> 00:01:22.920 Let's get talking about this bad movie. So the 00:01:22.920 --> 00:01:24.900 bad movie I've got for you this time is a little 00:01:24.900 --> 00:01:27.980 bit of a weird one. This is one that came out 00:01:27.980 --> 00:01:32.159 in 2012, December 4th, 2012. It's called Elfman. 00:01:33.239 --> 00:01:36.099 And basically there's one actor that you're going 00:01:36.099 --> 00:01:38.219 to know, but you're not going to know their name 00:01:38.219 --> 00:01:40.620 if I read their actual name, which is Jason Acuna. 00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:44.019 That is Wee Man from Jackass fame, if you've 00:01:44.019 --> 00:01:47.680 heard of that at least. And he plays the titular 00:01:47.680 --> 00:01:52.150 Elfman. I'm going to give you the IMDb. Before 00:01:52.150 --> 00:01:54.950 I give you a breakdown of what happens in this 00:01:54.950 --> 00:01:57.709 movie, an elf is left behind by Santa to help 00:01:57.709 --> 00:02:00.269 rescue the Harper family from a lousy Christmas. 00:02:00.489 --> 00:02:02.849 The elf and the family get more than they bargained 00:02:02.849 --> 00:02:05.689 for as the kids help the elf discover his special 00:02:05.689 --> 00:02:08.909 powers and true identity as a budding superhero. 00:02:09.580 --> 00:02:11.580 That's a real paint -by -numbers analysis of 00:02:11.580 --> 00:02:14.479 this movie. And I love that it says lousy Christmas, 00:02:14.580 --> 00:02:16.599 and that's just what you think it's going to 00:02:16.599 --> 00:02:19.240 be, is a lousy Christmas. Trust me, we go way 00:02:19.240 --> 00:02:22.860 further than just lousy Christmas. Also in this 00:02:22.860 --> 00:02:25.960 movie are Morelli Taylor, Jeffrey Combs, and 00:02:25.960 --> 00:02:28.319 Mackenzie Astin. And yes, if you've heard that 00:02:28.319 --> 00:02:31.379 name before, Mackenzie Astin is the half -sibling 00:02:31.379 --> 00:02:35.379 of Sean Astin. You may remember him from a certain... 00:02:36.099 --> 00:02:39.780 movies about a hobbit or you know rudy those 00:02:39.780 --> 00:02:42.960 kind of movies and even stranger things or 50 00:02:42.960 --> 00:02:46.300 first dates that guy mackenzie astin plays the 00:02:46.300 --> 00:02:49.139 dad eric jeffrey combs plays the leader of the 00:02:49.139 --> 00:02:51.639 kidnappers yes there's kidnappers uh his name 00:02:51.639 --> 00:02:54.659 is mickey amy is the name of morelli taylor's 00:02:54.659 --> 00:02:56.819 character she's a love interest and then of course 00:02:56.819 --> 00:02:59.969 we've got casey ryan and grandma None of which 00:02:59.969 --> 00:03:02.810 you'd recognize, but those are the main characters 00:03:02.810 --> 00:03:05.469 in this thing. We've also got two other kidnappers, 00:03:05.669 --> 00:03:09.389 Jean -Pierre and Big Bucket. I wish I was making 00:03:09.389 --> 00:03:12.409 that last name up. So my first note on this movie, 00:03:12.569 --> 00:03:14.909 and this is the first note, so you can already 00:03:14.909 --> 00:03:16.569 tell what kind of movie this is going to be. 00:03:16.689 --> 00:03:20.969 I said, can already tell this is going to be 00:03:20.969 --> 00:03:23.409 bad. Thank God this is only one and a half hours 00:03:23.409 --> 00:03:26.020 long. And I mean, a movie where Wee Man is the 00:03:26.020 --> 00:03:29.759 main actor, you can't be surprised that this 00:03:29.759 --> 00:03:33.719 is going to be bad. Eric, the dad, he created 00:03:33.719 --> 00:03:36.240 a chip that basically makes renewable energy. 00:03:36.520 --> 00:03:39.919 And so it can power up a whole house by itself. 00:03:40.500 --> 00:03:44.319 And he calls his investor to try to get him on 00:03:44.319 --> 00:03:47.599 the phone to basically take the chip and put 00:03:47.599 --> 00:03:50.400 it under lock and key. The investor's name is 00:03:50.400 --> 00:03:52.840 Stu. He's not really... A big deal in this thing. 00:03:52.919 --> 00:03:54.900 You see him one phone call and then he's gone. 00:03:55.460 --> 00:03:57.599 But he was just kind of. It's Christmas Eve. 00:03:57.840 --> 00:03:59.740 We're not going to deal with it until after Christmas. 00:03:59.900 --> 00:04:02.319 I'm not going to come get it. Just hold on to 00:04:02.319 --> 00:04:04.879 it. Put it in a safe spot. So Eric's doing all 00:04:04.879 --> 00:04:07.300 this stuff. And basically he's forgotten about 00:04:07.300 --> 00:04:09.180 a lot of things. That he usually does with his 00:04:09.180 --> 00:04:11.800 kids. For the Christmas season. There's no mom 00:04:11.800 --> 00:04:14.560 in the picture. We really don't know what happened. 00:04:14.659 --> 00:04:18.220 But you just know there's no mom. Until when 00:04:18.220 --> 00:04:20.930 they're putting stuff on the tree. The daughter 00:04:20.930 --> 00:04:24.110 has this terrible line read of, I miss mommy, 00:04:24.269 --> 00:04:27.870 like out of nowhere. Oh, look at this tree. It's 00:04:27.870 --> 00:04:32.430 so great. I miss mommy. What? Where'd that come 00:04:32.430 --> 00:04:35.750 from? Kid, what are you doing? It isn't really 00:04:35.750 --> 00:04:38.509 their fault. The dialogue is not great. But there's 00:04:38.509 --> 00:04:41.129 some of these lines that's just like, the kids 00:04:41.129 --> 00:04:43.410 say stuff at the same time. And it's like, goody, 00:04:43.410 --> 00:04:45.389 goody. And that kind of stuff where it's just 00:04:45.389 --> 00:04:50.120 somebody who doesn't know how kids talk. just 00:04:50.120 --> 00:04:53.500 wrote kids dialogue all of this decorating they're 00:04:53.500 --> 00:04:57.180 doing is juxtaposed with grandma driving to their 00:04:57.180 --> 00:04:59.839 house and it's like long scenes of grandma just 00:04:59.839 --> 00:05:03.139 driving ridiculously slow and it's over the river 00:05:03.139 --> 00:05:05.980 and through the hills kind of driving when she 00:05:05.980 --> 00:05:08.560 finally gets there eric says okay great you're 00:05:08.560 --> 00:05:10.279 gonna watch the kids i gotta get the ham because 00:05:10.279 --> 00:05:12.100 i totally forgot to pick it up from the butchers 00:05:12.100 --> 00:05:14.699 the kids help grandma load all of her stuff into 00:05:14.699 --> 00:05:19.899 the house and she basically says i've got a fruitcake 00:05:19.899 --> 00:05:22.399 but this famous fruitcake for whatever reason 00:05:22.399 --> 00:05:25.500 for like 20 seconds has this demon face that 00:05:25.500 --> 00:05:28.899 opens up and just kind of and then it disappears 00:05:28.899 --> 00:05:31.019 and it's a normal fruitcake again there's no 00:05:31.019 --> 00:05:34.399 no reason for it it's just a joke on the fact 00:05:34.399 --> 00:05:37.560 that hey grandma's terrible at cooking we're 00:05:37.560 --> 00:05:39.779 led to believe that eric only has to get ham 00:05:39.779 --> 00:05:44.389 but we see him in the next scene and it's shifted 00:05:44.389 --> 00:05:47.009 to nighttime it's not even day anymore it's shifted 00:05:47.009 --> 00:05:49.769 to nighttime and he has like packages of stuff 00:05:49.769 --> 00:05:51.910 but we only thought he was going to get the ham 00:05:51.910 --> 00:05:54.470 from the butcher at the butcher eric runs into 00:05:54.470 --> 00:05:57.110 amy who's like the assistant butcher there and 00:05:57.110 --> 00:05:59.209 basically they just have this weird flirtation 00:05:59.209 --> 00:06:01.110 like you can tell there's something going on 00:06:01.110 --> 00:06:03.910 between them but they're just absolutely awful 00:06:03.910 --> 00:06:08.490 at flirting it's just uncomfortable kinds of 00:06:08.490 --> 00:06:14.519 yeah so what are you doing for the holidays uh 00:06:14.519 --> 00:06:19.519 -huh yeah great but basically eric fights fights 00:06:19.519 --> 00:06:22.160 up the nerve and asks amy if she wants to come 00:06:22.160 --> 00:06:25.100 over and do christmas with them or christmas 00:06:25.100 --> 00:06:28.319 eve at least with them and originally she's just 00:06:28.319 --> 00:06:31.079 no we're open late i can't do anything and eric's 00:06:31.079 --> 00:06:33.279 kind of well you can come over whenever you know 00:06:33.279 --> 00:06:36.240 it's okay the deli owner's just like oh amy you 00:06:36.240 --> 00:06:39.589 can go it's fine i know you're you're kind of 00:06:39.589 --> 00:06:41.850 in love with this guy why don't you just go and 00:06:41.850 --> 00:06:44.750 she's like oh no i i couldn't yeah you're watching 00:06:44.750 --> 00:06:48.189 the shop and he goes i'm jewish it's fine one 00:06:48.189 --> 00:06:49.990 of the few good jokes about this i'm not gonna 00:06:49.990 --> 00:06:52.350 lie eric leaves the butcher after he's got his 00:06:52.350 --> 00:06:54.970 stuff and basically amy follows right behind 00:06:54.970 --> 00:06:57.750 him so we think we're gonna see her pretty close 00:06:57.750 --> 00:07:01.009 to when eric gets home then it flashes back to 00:07:01.009 --> 00:07:05.610 the house and grandma is talking with casey casey's 00:07:05.610 --> 00:07:09.430 the young girl and basically She's missing her 00:07:09.430 --> 00:07:11.790 mom. And we get some backstory about this is 00:07:11.790 --> 00:07:14.170 always sad for everyone because mom died around 00:07:14.170 --> 00:07:17.810 this time and everything. And the grandma gives 00:07:17.810 --> 00:07:21.389 this world class advice. She isn't ever coming 00:07:21.389 --> 00:07:25.370 back. So Casey basically drops it because, you 00:07:25.370 --> 00:07:27.009 know, she was just told that her mother's never 00:07:27.009 --> 00:07:28.970 coming back and doesn't love her pretty much. 00:07:29.430 --> 00:07:36.750 And grandma gives this little elf toy to Casey. 00:07:37.740 --> 00:07:40.339 And basically says, if you have a Christmas wish, 00:07:40.379 --> 00:07:43.300 you wish on this elf and it'll come true. They 00:07:43.300 --> 00:07:45.360 will. They'll work hard to make it come true. 00:07:45.439 --> 00:07:46.980 And it only works on Christmas and everything 00:07:46.980 --> 00:07:52.800 like that. And so Casey cuddles the elf and wishes 00:07:52.800 --> 00:07:55.579 for her family to be together and happy again. 00:07:55.779 --> 00:07:58.139 So remember that original thing? It was like, 00:07:58.240 --> 00:08:01.680 yeah, OK, save us from a lousy Christmas. Cool. 00:08:01.899 --> 00:08:04.829 I would believe that if that's. how they went 00:08:04.829 --> 00:08:07.290 down this road after this but that's not how 00:08:07.290 --> 00:08:11.050 it goes we see terrible cgi of a sleigh and reindeer 00:08:11.050 --> 00:08:14.810 going onto the roof of the house and santa's 00:08:14.810 --> 00:08:18.470 there with the elf navigator who doesn't have 00:08:18.470 --> 00:08:22.449 a name it's just elf navigator and we man we 00:08:22.449 --> 00:08:26.310 man is just named elf he's either known as elf 00:08:26.310 --> 00:08:30.079 or elf man in this entire movie so elf is in 00:08:30.079 --> 00:08:33.279 the back, and he's disgruntled because he finally 00:08:33.279 --> 00:08:35.659 gets sleigh duty, which is great. Everybody wants 00:08:35.659 --> 00:08:38.279 sleigh duty. But his job is just scooping up 00:08:38.279 --> 00:08:40.879 reindeer poop so that there's no sign that Santa 00:08:40.879 --> 00:08:43.159 was there. He's in the back of the sleigh, and 00:08:43.159 --> 00:08:45.200 he just knows. He's looking up at the sky, and 00:08:45.200 --> 00:08:48.340 he just knows that there's something more for 00:08:48.340 --> 00:08:50.799 him out there. Meanwhile, we go back to town, 00:08:50.899 --> 00:08:52.980 and we see Eric, and he's getting into his car, 00:08:53.080 --> 00:08:56.000 and everything's great. And then all of a sudden... 00:08:56.779 --> 00:08:59.179 He doesn't make it into the car before these 00:08:59.179 --> 00:09:01.100 three guys grab him and throw him in the back 00:09:01.100 --> 00:09:04.039 of a van. And not just any van, a flower van. 00:09:04.399 --> 00:09:06.659 This is going to be a real lousy Christmas if 00:09:06.659 --> 00:09:09.320 the dad gets murdered. Obviously, they want the 00:09:09.320 --> 00:09:11.500 chip. They want him to tell them where it is, 00:09:11.580 --> 00:09:15.000 but he's not going to tell them. So Eric's kidnapped 00:09:15.000 --> 00:09:18.340 in this van. Wee Man slash Elf is on the roof. 00:09:19.279 --> 00:09:23.139 Santa's in the house. Santa hears Casey crying 00:09:23.139 --> 00:09:26.809 on the Elf doll. And kind of hears what she had 00:09:26.809 --> 00:09:29.649 wished for because she wished it on the elf. 00:09:29.830 --> 00:09:32.190 So Santa knows exactly what to do. As he goes 00:09:32.190 --> 00:09:36.730 up on the roof, he leaves elf behind. Accidentally 00:09:36.730 --> 00:09:39.789 at first, you'd think. But Santa always has a 00:09:39.789 --> 00:09:42.169 plan. One of the things we don't know at this 00:09:42.169 --> 00:09:44.730 point, but elf definitely does, is that this 00:09:44.730 --> 00:09:48.710 happens sometimes. He needs to figure out the 00:09:48.710 --> 00:09:52.730 wish, resolve it, all before Santa gets back 00:09:52.730 --> 00:09:55.220 by the break of dawn. In a moment that's supposed 00:09:55.220 --> 00:09:58.539 to be funny, Elf falls off the roof and is starting 00:09:58.539 --> 00:10:00.519 to walk around the house and trying to figure 00:10:00.519 --> 00:10:02.659 out how to get in there and figure out what the 00:10:02.659 --> 00:10:07.299 wish is. At the same time, the van drives by 00:10:07.299 --> 00:10:11.039 with the kidnappers and Eric. And Eric sees the 00:10:11.039 --> 00:10:13.340 shadow and is just like, yeah, this is my security. 00:10:13.539 --> 00:10:15.860 You have no chance to get in there. And then 00:10:15.860 --> 00:10:19.419 they see... elf walking around and see his size 00:10:19.419 --> 00:10:21.720 and the stature and everything and they're all 00:10:21.720 --> 00:10:24.600 we're gonna be fine except for the main guy who 00:10:24.600 --> 00:10:28.720 thinks he's a troll and when he says that they 00:10:28.720 --> 00:10:32.440 all look up at the same time and go patrol troll 00:10:33.669 --> 00:10:36.110 In A Thing of Beauty, that actually is one of 00:10:36.110 --> 00:10:37.809 my other favorite parts of this movie. There's 00:10:37.809 --> 00:10:40.169 three parts that probably are my favorite parts 00:10:40.169 --> 00:10:43.129 of this movie. There's the Jewish deli owner 00:10:43.129 --> 00:10:45.269 who's just like, I'm Jewish, what do I care? 00:10:45.669 --> 00:10:47.889 There's patrol troll, and then there's something 00:10:47.889 --> 00:10:51.210 else coming at the end. The main kidnapper has 00:10:51.210 --> 00:10:54.309 apparently dealt with trolls before and thinks 00:10:54.309 --> 00:10:56.389 that the one troll is going to stop them from 00:10:56.389 --> 00:10:58.990 breaking in and stealing the chip. That's enough 00:10:58.990 --> 00:11:00.830 for the kidnappers to feel like they have to 00:11:00.830 --> 00:11:03.639 regroup and figure out their next plan. So where 00:11:03.639 --> 00:11:07.120 do they go? They go to the abandoned barn that's 00:11:07.120 --> 00:11:09.220 pretty much right across the street from the 00:11:09.220 --> 00:11:11.820 house. Elf is trying to find a way inside the 00:11:11.820 --> 00:11:14.580 house, and he doesn't want to wake anybody. I 00:11:14.580 --> 00:11:17.559 don't know why, because again, we didn't know 00:11:17.559 --> 00:11:20.779 it at this point, but now knowing, it doesn't 00:11:20.779 --> 00:11:22.360 make sense that he doesn't want to know what 00:11:22.360 --> 00:11:25.039 the wish is. Because if he doesn't do it, then 00:11:25.039 --> 00:11:28.059 Santa doesn't pick him up again until he solves 00:11:28.059 --> 00:11:30.600 the wish, pretty much. Or at least that's what 00:11:30.600 --> 00:11:32.750 they made it seem like. So he's trying to sneak 00:11:32.750 --> 00:11:36.629 into the house and he is able to create like 00:11:36.629 --> 00:11:39.649 this doggy door in the window that he can sneak 00:11:39.649 --> 00:11:43.610 through. It literally is. He uses magic to make 00:11:43.610 --> 00:11:45.929 this door that really is like a doggy door. It 00:11:45.929 --> 00:11:49.009 can only push inside the house and it can only 00:11:49.009 --> 00:11:53.389 fit his elfness or maybe a kid his size. When 00:11:53.389 --> 00:11:55.210 he's inside the house, he's exploring the house 00:11:55.210 --> 00:11:57.909 and he sees cookies that grandma has made that 00:11:57.909 --> 00:12:00.309 they are completely burnt. The whole joke the 00:12:00.309 --> 00:12:02.409 entire time is that grandma is a terrible cook 00:12:02.409 --> 00:12:05.529 and there's plenty of times where that comes 00:12:05.529 --> 00:12:08.490 into play. But he's able to turn these cookies. 00:12:08.629 --> 00:12:11.649 He's able to unburn them so that they're normal 00:12:11.649 --> 00:12:14.370 cookies and he just starts chowing down. This 00:12:14.370 --> 00:12:17.269 is the part where I had a problem. So like they 00:12:17.269 --> 00:12:20.269 said during the synopsis that they're supposed 00:12:20.269 --> 00:12:23.710 to help him find his powers. But he already kind 00:12:23.710 --> 00:12:25.970 of knows how to make a doggy door, and he also 00:12:25.970 --> 00:12:29.509 knows how to unburn cookies. Are we just supposed 00:12:29.509 --> 00:12:32.370 to believe that he doesn't know about his other 00:12:32.370 --> 00:12:35.429 powers? Does he just forget about his other powers? 00:12:35.529 --> 00:12:37.570 Does he just think these are the only two things 00:12:37.570 --> 00:12:40.110 he can do? Now we go back to the kidnappers, 00:12:40.149 --> 00:12:41.830 and we kind of learn a little more about them. 00:12:42.110 --> 00:12:44.309 Mickey is the leader of this group. He's also 00:12:44.309 --> 00:12:50.159 the one that is most... I'll say cautious. I 00:12:50.159 --> 00:12:51.860 don't really mean cautious, but he's the most 00:12:51.860 --> 00:12:53.840 superstitious. He's the one that saw the troll 00:12:53.840 --> 00:12:57.360 and was kind of like, trolls are bad luck. We 00:12:57.360 --> 00:13:00.200 can't fight a troll. The other two, one of them's 00:13:00.200 --> 00:13:03.360 name is JP or Jean -Pierre. He has a terrible 00:13:03.360 --> 00:13:05.740 French accent the entire time, like omelette 00:13:05.740 --> 00:13:10.500 du fromage. Oh, my God. Sacre bleu. And the final 00:13:10.500 --> 00:13:13.279 one is definitely the muscle, but also like the 00:13:13.279 --> 00:13:15.759 smartest one of them. His name is Big Bucket. 00:13:16.399 --> 00:13:19.419 I don't know why he's called Big Bucket. I really 00:13:19.419 --> 00:13:22.279 wish he had a better name. Mickey tells Big Bucket 00:13:22.279 --> 00:13:25.100 that he needs to figure out how to turn off all 00:13:25.100 --> 00:13:28.500 the cell phones, signals, and all the lights 00:13:28.500 --> 00:13:30.940 on the street, as well as he needs to go to the 00:13:30.940 --> 00:13:35.220 store to get Troll Off, which is really what 00:13:35.220 --> 00:13:37.360 it sounds like. It's like the bug spray off, 00:13:37.620 --> 00:13:40.679 but for trolls. It also becomes pretty apparent 00:13:40.679 --> 00:13:44.629 at this point that Mickey doesn't trust JP. So 00:13:44.629 --> 00:13:47.110 he leaves all this up to Big Bucket because he 00:13:47.110 --> 00:13:49.629 really just trusts Big Bucket. So Big Bucket 00:13:49.629 --> 00:13:51.950 goes off to do all the chores that he was assigned. 00:13:52.250 --> 00:13:54.090 So the kids, Ryan and Casey, they hear something 00:13:54.090 --> 00:13:56.330 downstairs and they go downstairs. Ryan's trying 00:13:56.330 --> 00:13:58.850 to be a tough guy, but Casey recognizes that 00:13:58.850 --> 00:14:01.250 it's the elf she kind of wished for that's supposed 00:14:01.250 --> 00:14:04.190 to make her wish come true. Elf doesn't want 00:14:04.190 --> 00:14:05.730 any part of it. He doesn't want to help out or 00:14:05.730 --> 00:14:09.679 anything like that. But Casey basically... gets 00:14:09.679 --> 00:14:13.179 him to admit that if he doesn't santa is not 00:14:13.179 --> 00:14:15.679 going to take him back to the north pole he kind 00:14:15.679 --> 00:14:20.000 of agrees to vague i hope we're uh i want my 00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:24.139 family together and i hope we're happy um at 00:14:24.139 --> 00:14:26.700 this point they kind of don't know that the dad's 00:14:26.700 --> 00:14:29.000 been kidnapped they just assume he's taking his 00:14:29.000 --> 00:14:31.299 time in town and just hasn't gotten back yet 00:14:31.299 --> 00:14:36.409 and that's when the doorbell rings After like 00:14:36.409 --> 00:14:39.429 four hours, it seems like, of in -movie time, 00:14:39.750 --> 00:14:44.750 Amy has finally gotten there and they need to 00:14:44.750 --> 00:14:48.610 hide the elf as well as they pretend that Eric 00:14:48.610 --> 00:14:51.789 the dad is there for some reason. And I still 00:14:51.789 --> 00:14:53.730 don't know why they did that, but they pretend 00:14:53.730 --> 00:14:57.809 he's there. So they have the elf go into the 00:14:57.809 --> 00:15:01.129 shower and start singing and turning on like 00:15:01.129 --> 00:15:04.970 shavers and blow dryers and stuff like that. 00:15:05.240 --> 00:15:07.159 Just to give the appearance that he's there. 00:15:07.679 --> 00:15:10.120 I don't know why they're pretending that he is 00:15:10.120 --> 00:15:12.120 home. They could just say that he hasn't been 00:15:12.120 --> 00:15:16.340 home yet. And even grandma's in on the joke and 00:15:16.340 --> 00:15:20.100 knows that the elf is there. And so it just doesn't 00:15:20.100 --> 00:15:22.679 make sense to me. Like, yeah, okay, hide the 00:15:22.679 --> 00:15:24.539 elf. For sure, hide the elf. Because nobody's 00:15:24.539 --> 00:15:25.919 going to believe that you have a freaking elf. 00:15:26.399 --> 00:15:29.279 But why are you pretending the dad is there if 00:15:29.279 --> 00:15:32.139 he hasn't gotten back yet? Now that the elf's 00:15:32.139 --> 00:15:34.279 in hiding, Amy's at the house, and the kidnappers 00:15:34.279 --> 00:15:36.840 have Eric. It seems like a good time to give 00:15:36.840 --> 00:15:39.139 a shout out to our winner that guessed the bad 00:15:39.139 --> 00:15:43.019 movie first. That is Your Next Favorite Movie 00:15:43.019 --> 00:15:48.500 Podcast at YNFMoviePod on Twitter slash X slash 00:15:48.500 --> 00:15:50.860 whatever the fuck we're calling it. He's taking 00:15:50.860 --> 00:15:52.740 a little break right now. He hasn't done an episode 00:15:52.740 --> 00:15:54.779 in a little while, but the premise of the show 00:15:54.779 --> 00:15:57.500 was Josh G interviews people about some of their 00:15:57.500 --> 00:16:00.639 favorite movies. One of the first people that 00:16:00.639 --> 00:16:03.799 followed us on the Bird app or whatever the fuck 00:16:03.799 --> 00:16:06.269 it's called now. Even though he hasn't put out 00:16:06.269 --> 00:16:08.529 an episode in a while, he's still talking movies. 00:16:08.990 --> 00:16:12.210 Honestly, it's great content. You see his letterboxd 00:16:12.210 --> 00:16:14.009 every now and then, as well as some of the movies 00:16:14.009 --> 00:16:16.389 he's seen. Even though he hasn't released an 00:16:16.389 --> 00:16:18.409 episode in a little while, you still get some 00:16:18.409 --> 00:16:20.389 of his letterboxd. He's always watching movies. 00:16:20.470 --> 00:16:22.470 You can see some of his opinions on movies, as 00:16:22.470 --> 00:16:24.929 well as some of his favorite things. Uh, highly 00:16:24.929 --> 00:16:27.470 recommend checking out Josh G's page, your next 00:16:27.470 --> 00:16:31.970 favorite movie podcast at YNF movie pod on Twitter 00:16:31.970 --> 00:16:33.909 slash X slash whatever the fuck we're calling 00:16:33.909 --> 00:16:38.029 it. I'm going to say that as long as it's Twitter 00:16:38.029 --> 00:16:40.590 or X or whatever. He was the first one to get 00:16:40.590 --> 00:16:42.429 it. So he gets a special shout out on the show. 00:16:43.490 --> 00:16:46.210 We have played his promo before on the show, 00:16:46.250 --> 00:16:48.250 but he just wanted to shout out on this one just 00:16:48.250 --> 00:16:50.289 because he hasn't released an episode in a little 00:16:50.289 --> 00:16:52.889 while. I hope he gets back to it, and if he doesn't, 00:16:52.889 --> 00:16:55.789 that's okay. That's his choice. All right, so 00:16:55.789 --> 00:16:58.850 now we're back. So Amy's in the house. The elf 00:16:58.850 --> 00:17:00.909 is in the house pretending to be Eric, and Eric 00:17:00.909 --> 00:17:04.089 is at the barn across the street with the kidnappers. 00:17:04.410 --> 00:17:09.529 Grandma is trying to appease Amy by keep giving 00:17:09.529 --> 00:17:13.450 her food that's just absolutely god -awful, including 00:17:13.450 --> 00:17:17.430 eggnog that has, like, turkey eggs in it. That's 00:17:17.430 --> 00:17:20.849 kind of the joke. I just include a note saying 00:17:20.849 --> 00:17:23.450 that this gross food is just a dumb joke and 00:17:23.450 --> 00:17:28.690 just shouldn't be a part of this. Big Bucket 00:17:28.690 --> 00:17:31.509 is returning from the store, but his light is 00:17:31.509 --> 00:17:36.269 out and a police officer pulls him over and basically 00:17:36.269 --> 00:17:40.230 was just, hey, what are you doing here? And kind 00:17:40.230 --> 00:17:43.970 of ribbing him a little bit and says at the end, 00:17:44.029 --> 00:17:45.410 you know, I'm just fucking with the big man. 00:17:45.490 --> 00:17:47.369 Like, it's OK. It's all good and everything like 00:17:47.369 --> 00:17:50.519 that. What are you doing out here? And Big Bucket's 00:17:50.519 --> 00:17:53.940 just like, well, I'll be honest. I'm out on parole. 00:17:54.079 --> 00:17:57.660 I'm hanging out with other criminals. We've kidnapped 00:17:57.660 --> 00:18:00.539 this guy for this microchip that he has. And 00:18:00.539 --> 00:18:03.220 we're just trying to get that microchip and sell 00:18:03.220 --> 00:18:05.619 it for millions of dollars by the end of the 00:18:05.619 --> 00:18:09.819 week. And the cop's just kind of, oh, that's 00:18:09.819 --> 00:18:12.720 funny. You're messing me. You got me back. The 00:18:12.720 --> 00:18:14.880 only reason I include this exchange is because 00:18:14.880 --> 00:18:17.660 I need you all to know what the character's name 00:18:17.660 --> 00:18:22.940 is for the officer. It is Officer Schlub. They 00:18:22.940 --> 00:18:24.460 didn't want to call him anything else except 00:18:24.460 --> 00:18:29.480 for Officer Schlub. So, yeah, there you go. I 00:18:29.480 --> 00:18:31.279 know this information, now you need to know this 00:18:31.279 --> 00:18:34.259 information too. Big Bucket's still my favorite 00:18:34.259 --> 00:18:36.259 of the three criminals, and he's definitely the 00:18:36.259 --> 00:18:37.940 smartest and strongest of the three as well. 00:18:39.039 --> 00:18:42.809 That's it at this point. He's headed back to 00:18:42.809 --> 00:18:46.670 the barn, but JP has an idea. He basically is 00:18:46.670 --> 00:18:50.089 pretending to be an electrician and needs to 00:18:50.089 --> 00:18:55.089 get into the lab to fix the wiring because it's 00:18:55.089 --> 00:18:57.890 about to overheat, and he knew that out of nowhere. 00:18:58.170 --> 00:19:00.309 Grandma doesn't really believe the phony baloney 00:19:00.309 --> 00:19:02.950 story, but at the same time lets him in to go 00:19:02.950 --> 00:19:06.140 take a look upstairs. This is also the part I've 00:19:06.140 --> 00:19:09.000 noticed that Grandma's lines start getting, I 00:19:09.000 --> 00:19:11.119 think, a little more drunker or she forgot to 00:19:11.119 --> 00:19:13.079 put her teeth in because it's starting to become 00:19:13.079 --> 00:19:17.920 a little more... That kind of stuff. It's definitely 00:19:17.920 --> 00:19:20.500 old lady, like, forgetting her teeth kind of 00:19:20.500 --> 00:19:24.400 lines now. JP in disguise goes up to the office 00:19:24.400 --> 00:19:28.519 or the lab where the microchip is supposed to 00:19:28.519 --> 00:19:31.660 be. But Elf kind of hears him and is wondering 00:19:31.660 --> 00:19:33.480 what's happening, so he kind of follows him up 00:19:33.480 --> 00:19:35.990 there. And when he sees him start looking around, 00:19:36.230 --> 00:19:39.349 he kind of starts fighting him thinking, hey, 00:19:39.430 --> 00:19:42.089 you're not supposed to be up here. Grabs him. 00:19:42.390 --> 00:19:45.069 And in the commotion, they fall out a window 00:19:45.069 --> 00:19:48.329 and they fall down to the ground. This house 00:19:48.329 --> 00:19:50.690 is like five stories tall. I'm pretty sure either 00:19:50.690 --> 00:19:54.589 of them would have been dead. It knocks out Elf 00:19:54.589 --> 00:19:59.170 and JP is able to run away and get into the van. 00:20:00.269 --> 00:20:03.009 This van is very noticeable because again, it 00:20:03.009 --> 00:20:06.309 says like flowers on it. It's, it's a very noticeable 00:20:06.309 --> 00:20:10.089 van. So elf is able to wake up from being knocked 00:20:10.089 --> 00:20:12.690 out from falling five stories and is able to 00:20:12.690 --> 00:20:16.130 catch the van that JP is in and see it drive 00:20:16.130 --> 00:20:18.750 to the barn across the street. So now he knows, 00:20:18.890 --> 00:20:22.650 Hey, this is probably where Eric is. So he goes 00:20:22.650 --> 00:20:25.269 and tells the family and Amy sees elf for the 00:20:25.269 --> 00:20:28.150 first time. And there's just kind of, uh, that's 00:20:28.150 --> 00:20:30.930 a, that's a fucking elf. What the fuck is it 00:20:30.930 --> 00:20:33.789 doing here? They explain the whole situation. 00:20:33.910 --> 00:20:36.670 She's still a little crazy about it, but doesn't 00:20:36.670 --> 00:20:39.589 believe it. But they know he's going to be the 00:20:39.589 --> 00:20:42.769 one that has to save Eric. So they go to the 00:20:42.769 --> 00:20:48.630 barn and elf man slash elf kind of sneaks in 00:20:48.630 --> 00:20:52.730 and is trying to untie Eric before the kidnappers 00:20:52.730 --> 00:20:55.759 see him. He's almost there when. He's almost 00:20:55.759 --> 00:20:59.079 there getting Eric untied when Mickey comes in 00:20:59.079 --> 00:21:01.700 and sees him and holds up this brand new can 00:21:01.700 --> 00:21:05.940 of Troll Off. Once again, some of these jokes, 00:21:05.980 --> 00:21:09.519 man, they were desperate. So Elf, not willing 00:21:09.519 --> 00:21:12.160 to be sprayed with this Troll Off, runs away 00:21:12.160 --> 00:21:15.319 and goes into this further part of the barn. 00:21:15.400 --> 00:21:18.579 And everything he grabs turns into a toy for 00:21:18.579 --> 00:21:21.579 some reason. So all of it's like magically turning 00:21:21.579 --> 00:21:25.160 into a toy. And he's just kind of like... Well, 00:21:25.160 --> 00:21:29.119 shit. Okay, I gotta get away from this. So, he 00:21:29.119 --> 00:21:35.099 gets outside the barn and waves his fingers and 00:21:35.099 --> 00:21:40.900 makes the hill to the house just covered in snow 00:21:40.900 --> 00:21:43.319 like a snowboarding hill. And then he's able 00:21:43.319 --> 00:21:46.559 to turn a 2x4 into a snowboard and snowboard 00:21:46.559 --> 00:21:48.700 away from them. And this was actually, I think, 00:21:48.720 --> 00:21:51.039 a smart decision. It's not filmed well at all. 00:21:51.839 --> 00:21:55.769 But... Wee Man's background is skateboarding, 00:21:55.769 --> 00:21:58.430 snowboarding, that kind of stuff. Why not give 00:21:58.430 --> 00:22:01.869 him a snowboarding scene? If this was done right, 00:22:01.930 --> 00:22:03.869 this could actually have been a pretty cool scene, 00:22:04.009 --> 00:22:07.750 but of course they fucked it up. Too many cuts, 00:22:07.849 --> 00:22:09.990 so you don't see actual any snowboarding. It's 00:22:09.990 --> 00:22:12.049 just kind of his head, then the snowboard, and 00:22:12.049 --> 00:22:14.450 then it's the bad guys realizing that it's all 00:22:14.450 --> 00:22:17.430 snow, and they're not able to catch up with him, 00:22:17.509 --> 00:22:20.720 and he gets to the house. So now the family is 00:22:20.720 --> 00:22:23.440 fully aware that Eric has been kidnapped, that 00:22:23.440 --> 00:22:27.440 they're trying to steal the chip and that elf 00:22:27.440 --> 00:22:30.460 man doesn't think he can do anything. So he doesn't 00:22:30.460 --> 00:22:33.319 want to help anymore. And of course it pisses 00:22:33.319 --> 00:22:35.140 off Casey, but he's just like, I'm just going 00:22:35.140 --> 00:22:37.160 to wait for Santa on the roof and I'm not going 00:22:37.160 --> 00:22:41.319 to help anymore. You know what it's time for 00:22:41.319 --> 00:22:45.640 a montage. That's what we need. A montage. Basically. 00:22:46.410 --> 00:22:49.029 They come up with the idea that Elfman needs 00:22:49.029 --> 00:22:51.450 his own costume to make him believe in himself. 00:22:51.630 --> 00:22:54.509 So they need to put together this costume. And 00:22:54.509 --> 00:22:56.509 so it's a montage of them trying different looks, 00:22:56.609 --> 00:22:59.250 trying different materials to make Elfman this 00:22:59.250 --> 00:23:01.769 costume. They haven't measured him or anything, 00:23:01.890 --> 00:23:03.730 but it's just perfect by the end because, you 00:23:03.730 --> 00:23:07.430 know, movie. So Amy gets on and off the roof. 00:23:07.490 --> 00:23:09.569 It's very awkward both times when she gets on 00:23:09.569 --> 00:23:11.849 and off the roof, but it's. In the middle, there's 00:23:11.849 --> 00:23:14.569 this big passionate speech of, we need you, we 00:23:14.569 --> 00:23:17.049 need you to help, and everything like that. And 00:23:17.049 --> 00:23:19.289 I think the scenes of her trying to get on and 00:23:19.289 --> 00:23:22.710 off the roof, she backs up to get on the roof 00:23:22.710 --> 00:23:25.210 and backs up to get off the roof. I really think 00:23:25.210 --> 00:23:27.269 it's to show off her butt in those yoga pants. 00:23:28.430 --> 00:23:32.170 Which I don't think I would have been aware of 00:23:32.170 --> 00:23:34.690 if they didn't make it blatantly obvious. That's 00:23:34.690 --> 00:23:38.250 the thing about the whole thing. It was very... 00:23:39.029 --> 00:23:41.970 obvious that they want her to lead with her butt 00:23:41.970 --> 00:23:45.529 so that's that's the reason i think they did 00:23:45.529 --> 00:23:47.690 this but she gives this whole passionate speech 00:23:47.690 --> 00:23:50.829 and basically gets elf man to believe himself 00:23:50.829 --> 00:23:53.569 and then gives him the costume and he's kind 00:23:53.569 --> 00:23:55.589 of looking at it and it's like it's cheap it's 00:23:55.589 --> 00:23:58.150 homemade and everything like that it's not what 00:23:58.150 --> 00:24:01.430 you see on the cover quite yet While the burglars 00:24:01.430 --> 00:24:04.349 are watching the house and trying to figure out 00:24:04.349 --> 00:24:06.670 a plan, Eric has been cutting away at his ropes 00:24:06.670 --> 00:24:09.130 and he's able to get away and get back to the 00:24:09.130 --> 00:24:11.650 house. So he's safe now. And you're probably 00:24:11.650 --> 00:24:14.049 thinking, well, how did he get away? How did 00:24:14.049 --> 00:24:17.170 he have all that time? Well, he just had to cut 00:24:17.170 --> 00:24:19.029 the ropes and get across the street because the 00:24:19.029 --> 00:24:21.089 kidnappers decided they were just going to hang 00:24:21.089 --> 00:24:23.730 out across the fucking street from the house 00:24:23.730 --> 00:24:26.549 they're trying to break into and rob. The robber's 00:24:26.549 --> 00:24:28.430 now realizing that they don't have Eric anymore 00:24:28.430 --> 00:24:32.710 and... The family is kind of preparing this defense 00:24:32.710 --> 00:24:37.390 for when they come. The robbers get into the 00:24:37.390 --> 00:24:40.809 van and pull into the driveway. Grandma's looking 00:24:40.809 --> 00:24:43.670 out the window and she looks at the van pulling 00:24:43.670 --> 00:24:47.210 in and goes, Sundays are coming. I don't know 00:24:47.210 --> 00:24:50.109 why. And I said this movie really wants to be 00:24:50.109 --> 00:24:52.970 home alone meets superhero movie. Like so badly, 00:24:53.029 --> 00:24:55.130 this is what it wants to be. You can tell that 00:24:55.130 --> 00:24:58.049 this is what it's looking up to. but it just 00:24:58.049 --> 00:25:00.609 never gets to that good point for either of them. 00:25:00.710 --> 00:25:04.450 It's a terrible Home Alone ripoff. It's an awful 00:25:04.450 --> 00:25:08.950 superhero ripoff. It just never hits that. So 00:25:08.950 --> 00:25:12.190 before they leave the van, Elfman, now making 00:25:12.190 --> 00:25:14.970 some magic to make his costume a little better, 00:25:15.089 --> 00:25:17.509 and this is the one you see in the pictures and 00:25:17.509 --> 00:25:20.769 everything like that, he stands in front of the 00:25:20.769 --> 00:25:25.599 front door. To his left on the porch, sitting 00:25:25.599 --> 00:25:28.819 on the swing, is JP. To the right on the porch 00:25:28.819 --> 00:25:31.819 is Big Bucket. And down the middle of the steps 00:25:31.819 --> 00:25:35.240 is Mickey. Kind of does that western theme, you 00:25:35.240 --> 00:25:41.000 know, like the... That kind of thing. And this 00:25:41.000 --> 00:25:42.799 is the third joke that I actually kind of liked. 00:25:43.200 --> 00:25:45.200 Usually when there's a western like this, the 00:25:45.200 --> 00:25:47.319 tumbleweed rolls across and everything like that. 00:25:47.420 --> 00:25:49.859 They made it a wreath. I actually thought that 00:25:49.859 --> 00:25:52.019 was a very funny, well -done movie on that one. 00:25:52.650 --> 00:25:55.930 elfman is ready to save the day and mickey comes 00:25:55.930 --> 00:25:59.990 closer to him and basically he's able to fight 00:25:59.990 --> 00:26:02.410 off mickey for a little bit he's able to fight 00:26:02.410 --> 00:26:05.470 off jp and finally big bucket but mickey gets 00:26:05.470 --> 00:26:08.930 back to him and pulls out the secret weapon it's 00:26:08.930 --> 00:26:12.309 mistletoe i didn't know that mistletoe is apparently 00:26:12.309 --> 00:26:16.569 harmful to elves because he's able to use it 00:26:16.569 --> 00:26:19.710 like a lightning bolt and shock elfman and like 00:26:19.710 --> 00:26:26.099 hold him down and it's Terrible CGI, but it is 00:26:26.099 --> 00:26:28.599 a thing that happens. I guess I don't understand 00:26:28.599 --> 00:26:36.099 why mistletoe is the thing that can hurt an elf 00:26:36.099 --> 00:26:39.319 so badly. Mickey is able to use the mistletoe 00:26:39.319 --> 00:26:43.700 to push Elfman through the front door where the 00:26:43.700 --> 00:26:46.200 family's waiting with weapons and stuff. And 00:26:46.200 --> 00:26:48.759 by weapons, I mean Amy has a rolling pin kind 00:26:48.759 --> 00:26:53.309 of thing. They see that the mistletoe is hurting 00:26:53.309 --> 00:26:57.630 Elfman and Casey knows that the only way to combat 00:26:57.630 --> 00:27:01.430 the mistletoe hurting Elfman is to kiss under 00:27:01.430 --> 00:27:07.710 it. So basically forces Eric and Amy to like 00:27:07.710 --> 00:27:12.410 give this make out session because it turns the 00:27:12.410 --> 00:27:15.009 negative energy. It reverses it into positive 00:27:15.009 --> 00:27:17.990 energy that doesn't help Elfman, but it doesn't 00:27:17.990 --> 00:27:20.319 hurt him as much anymore. So they just do like 00:27:20.319 --> 00:27:25.059 this full make out. And this is all after Eric 00:27:25.059 --> 00:27:28.940 gave the chip to Mickey because he didn't want 00:27:28.940 --> 00:27:31.920 Elfman to get killed. So the kidnappers are happy. 00:27:31.960 --> 00:27:33.900 They hop in their van and instead of driving 00:27:33.900 --> 00:27:36.279 away, you know, they go to the abandoned barn 00:27:36.279 --> 00:27:39.180 because that's where they're holed up at instead 00:27:39.180 --> 00:27:43.920 of, you know, escaping, whatever. Elfman is slowly 00:27:43.920 --> 00:27:48.099 reviving from the result of the. negative energy 00:27:48.099 --> 00:27:51.220 of the mistletoe eric and amy are just like yay 00:27:51.220 --> 00:27:53.740 they love each other grandma's happy casey is 00:27:53.740 --> 00:27:56.619 happy ryan he didn't really like amy but now 00:27:56.619 --> 00:27:59.500 he's kind of happy so it's all fine and then 00:27:59.500 --> 00:28:02.180 elf man swears that he's going to get the chip 00:28:02.180 --> 00:28:05.859 back and so he flies out the door and basically 00:28:05.859 --> 00:28:08.819 flies away like flies through the town and everything 00:28:08.819 --> 00:28:12.000 like that and you're just like cool so he's just 00:28:12.000 --> 00:28:14.200 gonna stop him and everything like that and then 00:28:14.200 --> 00:28:16.319 he flies back to the barn where they're hanging 00:28:16.319 --> 00:28:20.099 out and they can see from the house he flew so 00:28:20.099 --> 00:28:22.059 far away that they definitely could not see him 00:28:22.059 --> 00:28:24.099 there's no way in hell they could see him and 00:28:24.099 --> 00:28:26.440 then he must have flown back because now they're 00:28:26.440 --> 00:28:29.160 watching as if he's across the street at the 00:28:29.160 --> 00:28:31.740 barn they no longer have mistletoe they're one 00:28:31.740 --> 00:28:34.779 thing that was working against elfman elfman's 00:28:34.779 --> 00:28:37.400 able to kick all of their asses pretty much he 00:28:37.400 --> 00:28:41.069 kicks mickey And grabs the chip and swallows 00:28:41.069 --> 00:28:44.509 it. Which I don't understand why, but he swallowed 00:28:44.509 --> 00:28:48.650 it. And then the whole family's there. And they're 00:28:48.650 --> 00:28:51.049 able to help him and give him support by throwing 00:28:51.049 --> 00:28:54.809 fruitcakes at Big Bucket. Or all this Christmassy 00:28:54.809 --> 00:28:57.630 weaponry and stuff like that. And so they're 00:28:57.630 --> 00:29:00.609 able to distract him so he can take him one -on 00:29:00.609 --> 00:29:05.130 -one. So Elfman's not overpowered. And they make 00:29:05.130 --> 00:29:07.130 sure there's no mistletoe or anything like that. 00:29:07.559 --> 00:29:10.059 And then finally, the last thing that happens 00:29:10.059 --> 00:29:12.559 is the three of them are about to get away because 00:29:12.559 --> 00:29:15.539 they're able to escape and run away. Even though 00:29:15.539 --> 00:29:17.000 they don't have the chip, they can at least get 00:29:17.000 --> 00:29:20.319 away and not get arrested. Well, Grandma brings 00:29:20.319 --> 00:29:25.359 her old demon face fruitcake and throws it. And 00:29:25.359 --> 00:29:28.900 Elfman basically just enlarges the demon face 00:29:28.900 --> 00:29:32.140 fruitcake and it falls on them and crushes them. 00:29:32.279 --> 00:29:35.220 So they're held in position until... officer 00:29:35.220 --> 00:29:38.140 schlub can get there and arrest them all and 00:29:38.140 --> 00:29:42.019 kind of saves the day. So I'll fans done it. 00:29:42.559 --> 00:29:45.779 He stopped the bad guys. He has the chip, even 00:29:45.779 --> 00:29:48.059 though he swallowed the chip. And one of the 00:29:48.059 --> 00:29:51.960 things I forgot to mention is he can like burp 00:29:51.960 --> 00:29:56.019 bubbles. So he burps a bubble that has the chip 00:29:56.019 --> 00:29:58.519 pops it and gives it back to Eric and the family. 00:29:59.319 --> 00:30:01.859 They're all congratulating him, save the day, 00:30:01.980 --> 00:30:03.880 everything like that. You know, they're all happy. 00:30:04.220 --> 00:30:07.940 And Elfman kind of realizes his job is done. 00:30:08.099 --> 00:30:11.380 The family's happy. They're together again. Amy 00:30:11.380 --> 00:30:15.359 and Eric are together. So Casey's happy. But 00:30:15.359 --> 00:30:17.700 Casey's also not happy because she feels abandoned 00:30:17.700 --> 00:30:20.630 because Elfman's going to leave. Well, Elfman 00:30:20.630 --> 00:30:22.950 just kind of says, like, I'm always here with 00:30:22.950 --> 00:30:26.430 you. I built this elf toy, so it will always 00:30:26.430 --> 00:30:28.670 be with you. If you ever have a wish, make it 00:30:28.670 --> 00:30:31.250 on there, and I'll be here. But I've got to help 00:30:31.250 --> 00:30:34.410 other boys and girls who have wishes, too. Elfman 00:30:34.410 --> 00:30:38.230 needs to save the day. So Santa picks him up, 00:30:38.309 --> 00:30:42.190 and Elfman's on his way to help other boys and 00:30:42.190 --> 00:30:45.049 girls across the world. And Elfman, too, could 00:30:45.049 --> 00:30:48.470 come any day now. And by any day... Please, dear 00:30:48.470 --> 00:30:52.069 God, not anytime soon. So yeah, that's Elfman. 00:30:52.230 --> 00:30:55.170 That is the third bad Christmas movie that we 00:30:55.170 --> 00:30:57.789 decided to watch for this podcast. I'm going 00:30:57.789 --> 00:31:02.130 to say, if I'm saying that Wee Man is the best 00:31:02.130 --> 00:31:05.710 part of your cast, that's probably a bad sign, 00:31:05.829 --> 00:31:10.990 right? I'm not saying Wee Man for a jackass movie. 00:31:11.109 --> 00:31:17.910 I'm saying Wee Man in this role is... The best 00:31:17.910 --> 00:31:23.069 of this movie. That's not a good sign. That just 00:31:23.069 --> 00:31:26.029 isn't because we man's not necessarily an actor. 00:31:26.490 --> 00:31:28.829 There's some absolutely terrible lines in here. 00:31:28.890 --> 00:31:30.809 There's plenty of times where I'm just sitting 00:31:30.809 --> 00:31:33.470 there going, did he really just fucking say that? 00:31:33.529 --> 00:31:36.009 Did they just really say that? Oh my God. Patrol 00:31:36.009 --> 00:31:38.890 troll was the one exception. It's terrible line, 00:31:39.009 --> 00:31:42.490 but it's funny. And the, uh, I'm Jewish. Get 00:31:42.490 --> 00:31:45.539 out of here. Those are all pretty decent lines, 00:31:45.660 --> 00:31:48.000 but the rest of the stuff, not very great. And 00:31:48.000 --> 00:31:50.099 this is coming from the guy. So the, one of the 00:31:50.099 --> 00:31:53.339 writers of this movie is also, he's also the 00:31:53.339 --> 00:31:56.119 director, but his name is Ethan Wiley. Ethan 00:31:56.119 --> 00:31:59.119 Wiley is responsible for giving us house and 00:31:59.119 --> 00:32:03.339 house to the second story. Those are fine enough 00:32:03.339 --> 00:32:07.619 movies. Like they're indie gems, but they're 00:32:07.619 --> 00:32:11.069 fine enough movies. Those are the first two movies 00:32:11.069 --> 00:32:13.910 he wrote. And then Children of the Corn 5, Fields 00:32:13.910 --> 00:32:17.309 of Tear. After that, pretty much all straight 00:32:17.309 --> 00:32:19.809 to video stuff. Although Children of the Corn 00:32:19.809 --> 00:32:22.329 5 might have been too. But I know for certain 00:32:22.329 --> 00:32:25.410 the rest of it definitely was. This was as well 00:32:25.410 --> 00:32:28.829 probably one of the reasons why it was so hard 00:32:28.829 --> 00:32:30.630 for people to guess and everything like that. 00:32:30.950 --> 00:32:33.630 Just to give you more on the topic about Ethan 00:32:33.630 --> 00:32:38.410 Wiley. He's a director and he doesn't have... 00:32:38.799 --> 00:32:42.519 a picture on his IMDb page. That says a lot about 00:32:42.519 --> 00:32:45.359 what you need to know about this guy. The other 00:32:45.359 --> 00:32:47.640 guy who was responsible for writing it is Richard 00:32:47.640 --> 00:32:51.720 Jeffries, who, this was the last movie he wrote. 00:32:52.480 --> 00:32:55.700 This was in 2012. And it's not like the stuff 00:32:55.700 --> 00:32:59.500 he wrote before this was real gems either, but 00:32:59.500 --> 00:33:05.480 this is the last thing he wrote so far. That's 00:33:05.480 --> 00:33:07.680 a long gap. It's been 11 years since you've written 00:33:07.680 --> 00:33:12.319 anything. This movie was a 24 % audience score 00:33:12.319 --> 00:33:16.359 on Rotten Tomatoes. It is 3 .4 out of 10 on IMDb. 00:33:17.160 --> 00:33:20.400 You know, it's just everything about it was cheap. 00:33:20.440 --> 00:33:24.099 Everything about it was cheesy. And it's not 00:33:24.099 --> 00:33:27.279 a good film. It just is not all the way around. 00:33:28.140 --> 00:33:32.819 I would love to say something good about it. 00:33:32.859 --> 00:33:35.660 But really, I can't even find one good thing 00:33:35.660 --> 00:33:39.680 to say about it besides the three. gags that 00:33:39.680 --> 00:33:43.500 I laughed at and I'm not saying I liked I laughed 00:33:43.500 --> 00:33:47.779 at as far as where this is concerned on the list 00:33:47.779 --> 00:33:51.960 I've got this one as my fourth worst movie I've 00:33:51.960 --> 00:33:54.980 watched for this podcast pretty confident that's 00:33:54.980 --> 00:33:57.420 all you need to know about this fourth worst 00:33:57.420 --> 00:34:03.319 film I've seen for this podcast so yeah I would 00:34:03.319 --> 00:34:05.079 love to say more about Elfman, but I really have 00:34:05.079 --> 00:34:07.859 nothing good to say about it. And my mom raised 00:34:07.859 --> 00:34:10.139 me that if you don't have anything nice to say, 00:34:10.179 --> 00:34:12.739 don't say anything at all. So I'm just going 00:34:12.739 --> 00:34:15.059 to stop talking bad about this movie because 00:34:15.059 --> 00:34:22.719 it just was awful. Elfman, yeah. Nice try, Wee 00:34:22.719 --> 00:34:26.139 Man. Nice try. I see your goal here. You wanted 00:34:26.139 --> 00:34:27.760 to break into movies and especially something 00:34:27.760 --> 00:34:30.280 like this. Family friendly, fair. It could have 00:34:30.280 --> 00:34:33.510 done well for you. I get it. It didn't work. 00:34:34.130 --> 00:34:36.570 Back to the drawing board or jackass movies. 00:34:37.789 --> 00:34:42.309 Yeah, so that's Elfman. That's the first of two 00:34:42.309 --> 00:34:44.369 Christmas movies we are watching this month. 00:34:44.570 --> 00:34:46.630 There's another one coming out in a couple weeks. 00:34:46.849 --> 00:34:49.329 We also have a movie banter episode that should 00:34:49.329 --> 00:34:52.969 be coming out next week. There's tons of good 00:34:52.969 --> 00:34:57.190 stuff that I've seen for this that Jill and Andre 00:34:57.190 --> 00:34:59.449 have seen for this. We're getting the whole crew 00:34:59.449 --> 00:35:02.250 back together. It will be really good. I have 00:35:02.250 --> 00:35:04.489 a lot to choose from of movies that I've seen 00:35:04.489 --> 00:35:08.650 recently. And I don't know what we're going to 00:35:08.650 --> 00:35:10.369 talk about. I'm actually looking forward to it. 00:35:11.090 --> 00:35:14.869 But yeah, so that was Elfman, the latest bad 00:35:14.869 --> 00:35:19.090 movie on this bad movie podcast, Game for a Movie, 00:35:19.210 --> 00:35:21.289 where we ask, are you game for a movie? I've 00:35:21.289 --> 00:35:23.590 been Mike, your host for this episode. Thank 00:35:23.590 --> 00:35:26.269 you guys very much for tuning in. I'm glad you 00:35:26.269 --> 00:35:29.329 once again decided to listen to my lovely voice, 00:35:29.409 --> 00:35:32.210 my charming voice. Tell me some bad movies that 00:35:32.210 --> 00:35:34.150 you think we should cover on the podcast next. 00:35:34.289 --> 00:35:36.630 Always looking for the next worst thing. And 00:35:36.630 --> 00:35:38.150 we'll see you next time on Game for a Movie. 00:35:38.550 --> 00:35:41.250 Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah to all that celebrate. 00:35:41.570 --> 00:35:42.510 See you next time.