Yeah, I was gonna ask are we not doing a Ridley Scott series are we? No, no, no, no what we're doing is we're doing a Ridley Scott
Series, which is where we cash in on gladiator
24 years after its release. Yeah. Yeah amazing. Amazing. Let's start the show. Let's go
Oh
Hello everyone and welcome to the every movie ever podcast. My name is Ben Groves
Welcome to the show a movie podcast slash mental health check-in for two broken brain best friends talking around their problems
But not about their problems never about lost, you know laughing at movies
So before I get to what we're doing this week Ben, yeah, I do the more important question. Go for it
How are you doing this week? Do good man? Yeah, a little bit sleepy. My my mentals aren't too heavy at the moment
Which is nice. I've got heavy mental. I've not got the heavy mental someone there. I'm on the light shoe gazy mental
You're on the folk mental. Yeah, how about you? Oh, man, I've got the heaviest mental. Oh, no, I'm a bit gloomy
So I'm just gonna talk about a movie and we're gonna talk about
One of my favorite movies of all time and it's hopefully gonna make me feel better goods what we're doing today, buddy
Like I've just said we're cashing in
2000s gladiator cashing out epic sword and sandal revenge story
gladiator
Yeah, just quickly before we do Ben I want to point out not everyone likes everything
Right. I agree Marmite Coldplay pegging love of
That's right, so if you dear listener hear us cry pineapple, yes
It's just a short bit of the chat that might not be to everyone's taste and
Is less about the film than a brand new listener might need but not to worry the full
Spicy Hawaiian version of every episode is available over on patreon days beforehand
With all the pineapple you could ever want for just a pound a month
Likewise our potty mouths are gonna be censored in this version of the episode
But you can hear all the bad words you like on patreon like
Yes
We've got a lot to get into this week
So let's put the pineapple behind us for right now
Yeah, and talk about what we're gonna be getting into this week Ben. Let us give them give them the menu
We're gonna be getting into why Ridley Scott decided to make this film how this script evolved from thin pitch
To still quite thin final draft
Everything our tigers good co-stars how the sets of gladiator gave us the room we
Deserved hell. Yes, buddy. Now. Listen, I've gone a little bit over the board with the research on this
So I know it's your favorite film
Yeah
And it's weird cuz we kind of alternate weeks right like who we saw this one of you one of us will pick a film
We'll kind of guide the other one to it
Sure
But this is your week and we're doing gladiator and you've like you've just you sat me down you're like babe. I've got this
I've got this so I'm just gonna be told facts about my film. Yeah, cuz you started going. Yeah, I'm gonna do this
I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do this was like
You sit down
If I'm gonna tell you I'll pull your flash you get toilets
So swear jars at nine already that's fantastic
But I've gone over the top with research it's not all gonna get in the episode cuz I don't know hyper focus
Yeah, I've gone every every direction possible just in case it comes kicking it like old days
Right, cuz I know exactly which way this is going. Yeah, so
with gladiator to
rapidly approaching
We need to prepare ourselves for Ridley Scott to yet again
Ruin another one of his own universes
We're getting into this right I'm gonna set the scene for us you ready? I'm gonna set the scene the year 2000 Rob
I need you to come back with me to the year 2000 not much has changed, but we live underwater
Yeah, get out was that a busted was that a busted reference?
I don't know Ben your brain made it not me
Was that a busted reference answer me right now? I don't know the lyrics to it, but it sounded poppy
I hate right we're having great great granddaughter. Yeah in the bin get in the bin. He's pretty fine the year 2000
Nintendo have just announced GameCube, and I'm guessing that in response to that the European Union announces the euro
One coin to rule them all
Am I right Lord of the Rings fans my right Peter Jackson?
I think I am and this is much like why we write this together
Yeah, yeah, I haven't read this one down you can't veto this much like Brad and Angelina
The twin towers are going stronger than ever
Not a worry in sight god sakes
The first British women reached the South Pole
Really, there's a frigid joke in there, but I'm not gonna for god. I'm not gonna go there. It's fine. It's fine
There's a joke there. We're not we're we're both big enough to be in the South Pole
We're not we're both big enough to not make it all right. I'm glad Kevin Spacey's film American Beauty wins a load of awards in 2000
That's a good one aged well is it yeah? That's a good one that one, buddy. Oh
And Ridley Scott is given
103 million to make gladiator you're a big fan of tools and sandals aren't you Ben?
You're like a big no you love this genre
History I know two films in this genre. It's a period piece and it's sandals
I just like both of those, but I know two films in this category
Killa Gilla, I don't know that one. Yes, you do killer Gilla
Caligula Oh Caligula, sorry
Drop for a second and it was like
And I was like this is some
Movie about a haunted scuba suit
Amazing yes
Yes, okay, just a ghost that hunts fit right that's literally Ben you brought weird of films and being like yeah
Oh, well, you know it's like that classic 1970s exploitation movie lamp. Yeah, and I'm like what are you talking about?
Yeah, cuz now you don't know whether it's British exploitation, and it's just domestic violence
Or whether it's a physical lamp and the intrigue kills you you've got to watch it for a US space listeners
To lamp someone in the face is to to punch them. Oh, yeah, it's a punch. Yeah, I don't know why it's just a word
It's a slang word that exists a bit like yeet or Riz British people just lamp the English language until it submits
You know me yeah, this was kind of like the first swords and sandals film for a very long time
This was like somebody going I'm gonna spend a hundred million on a black and white musical
Yeah, and some would go and yeah great. I'll give you that
It's the script really strong
Okay, so you're not a swords and sandals guys, so I'm not you didn't watch this when it came out
I watched it when I was younger. I didn't watch it when it came out
Right. It's one of those films that people have always told me is
Amazing like mind mind-changingly good and I'm like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure it is
You know, it's Russell Crowe in a leather skirt and a sword running around right? Yeah
Oh, but tiger cool. Fantastic. What way to sum up this film in my mind in my very immature mind
That's all I ever saw holdovers mates. Just a cross-eyed guy looking after a kid in it
Oh what I wonder how this story is gonna end. Oh wait, it ended
2,000 years ago, obviously obviously the end is pretty clear right what mystery we're gonna run solving this one
I
Love the idea that you watch Passion of the Christ being like well know how this one ends
That's exactly what I did when I watched that film. I was like this no. Oh, yeah
I wonder I wonder where this is going. You know what I mean? There's none of that. Okay, you know exactly where it's going
It's just how racist is Mel Gibson. This wasn't your this wasn't your thing. Not for me you did you watch this when it came out?
I was
11 in the year 2000 gonna be turning 12
I was just at the age where I could start going to see stuff at the cinema
That wasn't like kids films, right? So I got snuck in to see the first Matrix movie
Jesus Christ
Right. No, Jesus Christ. Yeah snuck in to see this
Like it was one of my first
Adult films at the cinema. I think this is one of the films that set the template for what I think a blockbuster should be
Okay, I know contemporary blockbusters are like fast and the furious
Marvel movies transformers right where it's like it's a spectacle. Yeah, and it's incredibly easily digested and you were like I
Want more dust? I want more depth you can enjoy this film
Yeah, as just spectacle you certainly couldn't the year 2000 that oh, yeah
That's so now but in the year 2000 this was insane
Yeah, and you could do that, but you could also watch it on DVD
Six months to eight months later. Yeah and go. Oh, actually, this is really well written and there's loads of depth there
Which I don't think you can do with transformers rise of the beasts. I don't know man. Let's give it some time to cook
CGI age
Let's just let Michael Bay's masterpiece
For a bit, you know what I mean?
I just need a nice patina of 20 years of being out of date and then suddenly we went oh wow
This is war and peace look at Jurassic Park
1993 still holds up because most of its practical we covered that when we did
There's very little CGI in those films. There's like three show the transformers rise of the beast that that robot gorilla
Totally in camera. I didn't even know that the gorillas in
Yeah, I don't know I've seen it one the benefit of the people that haven't seen this film and want a reminder on what happened
So that you kind of have a better idea of what we're talking about going in or for people who've never seen it and never
Planned to I'll echo my co-host words last week grow up. It's a film. What's the worst that's gonna happen?
Do you want to break down the story? I've got a little jingle you ready? Yeah
We're having a breakdown
Maximus Decimus Meridius, thanks for full naming that one, but nailed it
Thank you
A respected Roman general is betrayed by Emperor Commodus who orders the murder of Maximus's family your I see what you've done here
This is great. Thank you. Genuinely haven't I wrote this in a rush. I didn't know
Okay after surviving an assassination attempt
Maximus is captioned and sold into slavery forced to fight as a gladiator
Stripped of his rank and his loved ones
Maximus's drive for revenge begins to take shape as he vows to confront Commodus and avenge the deaths of his wife and son
I mean that makes it sound really pulpy. It's actually done with quite a lot of sensitivity
It's a very delicate story. Yeah, very over it and it sounds like a sort of 1950 sci-fi novel
Yeah, literally. Maximus's journey takes him to the gladiatorial arena where he quickly gains fame for his combat skills
As he rises through the ranks his thirst for vengeance grows with each victory bringing him closer to his goal
Along the way Maximus forms bonds with fellow gladiators and together they face increasingly brutal challenges of the arena
Yeah
Despite the violence Maximus remains focused on his ultimate goal to confront the Emperor and restore his honor
Maximus's revenge is complicated as he gets closer to Commodus who now rules Rome
Maximus participates in a grand gladiatorial event in the Coliseum where he faces Commodus in a staged fight
But chooses to fight fairly
Keeping his moral code intact bigger man than I am in that scene. I'm telling you. Yeah, I had a curb stomped him immediately
His longing for vengeance intensifies as he realizes that even if he kills Commodus
He won't undo the losses that he has suffered. In the final moments of the film Maximus successfully kills Commodus
But is mortally wounded in the process
With his last breath he ensures that Rome will return to a republic
Fulfilling promises made in the start of the movie Maximus dies peacefully his quest for revenge complete
But his personal losses remained forever unhealed his actions restoring justice, but at the price of his life. I
Cannot get over how annoyed I am at myself right for not watching this film more
Okay, I I'm gonna temper that a little bit because I think I watched it quite young
In the cinema and then my mom was obsessed with it. She pulled it on DVD and part of like the whole
Way that we would watch films as a family is that we would eat dinner watch a movie whilst we're eating dinner
And then once the movie was over we chat for a few hours
So a lot of my early understanding of movies was based on my family doing what you and I do we chat about movies and all
This is good. And that was good in his subtext there. So I kind of got a cheat code to the subtext stuff, right?
Okay, had I watched it just by myself without a family of
You know readers who were like chatting about the subtext of a movie etc. Etc
Yeah, I just gone. Oh, it's cool action movie in it. I moved on with my life
And then maybe not watched it for 15 20 years and then gone. Yes fine. That's exactly what I've done
Right exactly what I've done, but I watched it now in 2024 having lived a life having lived a life and having gone through some struggles
Yeah, and then you watch this story and you're like, oh my god
Oh my god, it's a way more in-depth and nuanced way of saying there are two wolves inside you
The stories been because they're both are but except for ones a moral
slave murderer
One is a murderous slaver. So you know what I mean?
One of my early insights to this film that I adore and the reason I adore it is the first time you watch it
You look at Joaquin Phoenix playing Commodus and he both the lead performances in this are brilliant
We'll get into that they say the whole thing about it
But yes, please you watch you watch it and he's so effective at being a villain that you're on Maximus's side
You're like, yeah game. He's the worst
He's actually one of the most villainous turns on in cinema and you'd be right. He is one of the most villainous terms in cinema
Yeah, but as you grow older and you watch it again
You realize that Commodus as a character is about 17 or 18, right?
He's been raised his entire life in the sure knowledge
Mm-hmm that his father will respect thousands of years of tradition. Yeah and make him Emperor
Yeah, when his father dies, yeah
All of that surety and what his future was gonna be is what makes okay his father's complete disinterest and
rampant disrespect in front of
genuine slaves
Yeah, he will turn to people who are about 15 management layers down and go look at my son
Isn't here in front of everyone? Yeah. Oh, here comes my son
Across the battlefield the second that the war's over. Yeah. All right
Oh, you've lost an arm is it?
Disappointment that's what you've lost it for trust me mate. I'm as heartbroken as you are anyway
He that's all fine because he knows he just got a great grit and bear his teeth and it's gonna be he's gonna be emperor
And then on his deathbed his dad turns around and goes
Now I'm gonna give it to that guy that I get on with much much better
Yeah, I'm gonna give it to Maximus. I'm gonna change physics as far as you're concerned
Yeah, just to fuck you over. Yeah, and then in a moment of passion
He kills his dad which by the way was not rare at the time
That's an odd thing to say out loud succession by murder was really really common in monarchies, dude
all right, I need to look into this maybe history might be my thing because
Cleans my words cleanse a chip or two off my shoulder on that one
The rest of the film is a child an
Unloved child. Yeah going I just want these people to love me
Yeah, and his dad's ex keeps booting the door and going you're a no
Yeah, no get in the bin but I'm gonna back in the corner shoe
And then the film ends with this unloved child being murdered in front of his people and not a single one of them goes
Oh, that's a bit unfair. No one cares. No one single. Oh my god
The the actual fact of when I was watching this time around it brought me to tears for two reasons one when communist eyes
He threw Rome a 150 day
Gladiator event. It's a it's a hundred. It's half a year of games
Mmm, for just fun. Do you know how he paid for it by selling wheat reserves?
Yeah, not by raising taxes. He was like no no my people need to enjoy themselves not stress about money
I'm just gonna sell off our literal resources to make sure that everyone is a bit happier and then
He's dying
Everyone every single person in there is silent
No, what not one care is given my favorite scene in the whole film
Well, one of my favorite scenes in the whole film is when his father tells him he's not gonna be Emperor
Mm-hmm, and he gives his speech. I'm gonna read bits of it out and for those of you with daddy issues. Welcome
Mm-hmm says to his dad you wrote to me once listing the four chief virtues
Wisdom justice fortitude and temperance and as I read the list I knew I had none of them
Even then it was as if you didn't want me for your son
I searched the faces of the gods for ways to please you to make you proud
one kind word
One full hug where you pressed me to your chest and held me tight would have been like the sun on my heart for a thousand
Years, what is it in me that you hate so much?
Jesus Christ, you know, I mean he gets murdered at the end and everyone's like, yeah. Yeah, everyone's fine
He is literally just he just needs a cuddle right from the one person that's been an article to him his entire life
And it's it's heartbreaking. That's the one bit that got me
The second bit that got me is you're watching Maximus literally give up everything for a third time in one three hours
For a roam that he is never gonna see. Yeah, he's never gonna live in that. He's never gonna live in the society
He's like but but it deserves to be the best it possibly can be yeah, and it broke me
It's not what I expected from Ridley Scott. Let's put it that way like Ridley Scott alien
Selma and Louise like what are we talking about here?
Yeah, I Jane this is GI Jane right? He's got his tons of stuff legend tons of stuff. That is like
Great scripts big sci-fis, you know this and the other and then out of nowhere pulls out
Fucking sword and sandals gladiator piece. Yeah, but then he made aliens so he's kind of platinum trophy to film
Yeah, and then he's now just doing like Snoop Dogg side quests a dude
I've got I've got a whole bit on why he made this film, right? Okay. Thank you for that glorious transition
That was beautiful by the way
Yeah
Yeah, I'll try I get a hint. I'll try
so
Ridley Scott mm-hmm gets presented as a script right and they're like when he's handed this script
They're like it's not good right? You're not gonna want to do it and he was like right. I'm sold
yeah, let me just give this a squeeze over real quick and
Whilst being handed this script and being told that it isn't very good. Yeah, he was also shown a painting. Okay by
Jerome or Jerome a I don't know how to pronounce it. Yeah, Jerome Jerome Jerome they did Rio in the pin
In the pin, I mean you put 50p in you today, you know
Busted and Juran Juran jokes. Oh
Jesus Christ, but yes painted by Jerome. I've not seen it, but I
I read somewhere he'd seen a painting funny that you should say that because I tracked it down because he's a fucking idiot
Ridley Scott whilst being shown this script that was told was not very good was shown a painting by Jerome
This is a this is a direct quote from Ridley. Mm-hmm. First of all, I love doing period films Carrie
I love the research. I love to create sort of smells of the period right? Okay. Yeah
Yeah, it's an odd turn of phrase, but it's fine. You're right. Yeah, I think what we did with the first gladiator
I don't like being critical of other things that have happened before but I wasn't the biggest fan of
Hollywood Roman epics, right?
They feel artificial and so when I was asked to consider a script the script was not very good
But the person who gave it to me said I want to show you one thing picked up an illustration
This is true
It's called for those about to die by Jerome right holds it up
It's a picture of this big painting of the Coliseum and in the corner
This is there is this guy about to tune a fork this poor
He's got this thing in his neck and he's looking up for permission to kill. I went bloody hell
That's never been done before properly
Never and I said I'll do it and the person who gave me the script went you will and he was like yes
And the person said do you want to read the script and he said no
Scott said no and we went off and hit the ground running around the table and evolved the new material
So that's how we signed on for this film. Now. I was like, oh, okay. That's a pretty cool story
I'm gonna I'm gonna try and find the inspiration that inspired Ridley Scott to make gladiator
So I went out to try and find for those about to die. It's not a fucking painting by Jerome
I was gonna say I've just tried to Google it. Yeah, it's not one nothing came up while you were chatting
It's not one mate. What?
What it is, it's called a spawn book. It's called for the it's called Hail Caesar, right?
For those of us who are about to die. We salute you right? Okay, and it's the wrong painting
It's not about this painting because I've got
For those of us who are about to die. We salute you in front of me and it's a well-dressed gentleman
Instead in front of seven or eight gladiators and he's sort of peering up at the Emperor as if to be sort of like get me
The fuck out of it whilst the collar seam is being cleaned up, right? It's a great photo
It's a great painting great picture, but not the one it's not the one the one that Ridley Scott is talking about is
To go through wiki art
These drone things to try to find this image. Welcome to hyper focus corner
God it's called police saver so and it is by Jerome wildly different painting right?
Because in this one, he's not looking up at the Emperor for permission to kill
He's looking up at the Vestal Virgins and it's also
controversial because the Vestal Virgins are the only one that's not looking up at the Emperor
because the Vestal Virgins are putting their thumb down and it causes big outrage in the 1800s being sort of
Romans didn't use thumbs down as a negative
And then there was a huge debate for years about whether a thumb up or a thumb down was used in ancient Rome
Anyway, Ridley Scott's just done this big inspirational thing in an interview
For gladiator to be like yeah in the first one
This is what really got me and just name drop to everything wrong that could be wrong
It feeds my opinion of Ridley Scott
Okay, because Ridley Scott for me you remember when we first started Nolan and you were like he's just a posh
Posh boy making posh boy films. Yeah
For me Ridley Scott he gets alien which let's face it is only a third his film the writing
Yeah, and the art direction and all the people in that film that made that brilliant
It's not necessarily the directorial touch that makes alien brilliant. Yeah million things of which that's one
Yes, same with Blade Runner, right? Yeah, incredible looking films a lot amazing where the cameras decided to be put
It's the sets. Yes, it's the world building, right? Yes
So he's this kind of privately educated dude who just jobs about he's a massive history nerd
Yeah, and I think sometimes people ask him questions and he doesn't have an answer
But he's terrified like I used to be not very long ago, which happens
I went to a grammar school, which isn't private school, but it's that thing if someone asks you a thing and you just go
I've got to sound like I know what we're talking about because I'm the director and I'm promo in the film
They just chats just goes bleh
Yeah
Evidence by whilst I was looking into Ridley Scott Ridley Scott stated in an interview with Wired magazine
Right the best science fiction films ever made in his opinion, right? Ah
2001 a space Odyssey. Okay, I can see that Star Wars a new hope
Okay, that's fine. Yeah on the beach, which I've not seen not seen it next to I have
alien
Blade Runner
I love this guy. I love this guy so much and I'm gonna tell you what when I've been looking into Ridley Scott
Don't take this offensively after everything that you've just said. Uh-huh. He reminds me of you. Oh
No in the in the best possible way in the best possible way. This is me being a sincere, right?
He reminds me of you and I'm gonna get into why shortly. Okay. Okay
He reminds me of you for two reasons, right?
The way that he treated Russell Crowe and the way that he treated Joaquin Phoenix, right?
Love it. Brilliant performances by them in this film insane again
It feels like a lot of this film that a lot of what makes this film brilliant. Mm-hmm isn't Ridley Scott
Russell Crowe and Joaquin Phoenix if you swap them out for anyone Sean Penn and
Timothy Chalamet this film doesn't work. No, of course not
It's awful film, but you've mentioned about the scripts now
I've got a little tidbit about the script of this film and how it came to be the
We just mentioned that script was terrible. Ridley Scott didn't like it
Russell Crowe read it and was like this is stupid
He literally read it was like this is nonsense
I don't think I'm gonna do this film
And the only reason he signed on is because of the chats that he had with Ridley Scott now
I've got something from Russell Crowe here. I'm just gonna read this out verbatim
You do it in Russell Crowe's accent, yeah, he's Australian right?
Then no
I did it before and I had messages
I was confident about my abilities as a leading man
What I wasn't confident about with gladiator was the world that was surrounding me at the core of what we were doing was a great
Concept but the script was rubbish absolute rubbish and had all sorts of strange sequences
gladiators would have like
endorsements on their chariots for olive oil like adverts
Historically accurate, but why is this film? This is exactly what Russell Crowe said Russell Crowe said that's all true
But it's just not gonna ring right with a modern audience
They're gonna go what the fuck is all this right the energy around where we were and what we were doing was very fractured
I did think a couple of times. Maybe my best option is to just get on a plane and fuck off
It was my continued conversations with Ridley that sort of gave me faith
And this is where he reminded me of you a little bit because if I'm ever having a wobble
Or if I'm ever like uncomfortable with change, and I don't know which direction we're going in and all of this stuff
This is what Ridley did for Russell. He said to me at one point in time
Mate we're not committing anything to camera that you don't believe in 100%
Which is a lovely thing. That's also a lie
It was a thousand percent a lie, but anyway
So when we actually started the film we'd stripped the script
We'd stripped the script back to 21 pages
Oh that we had agreed on now a script is usually between a hundred and three and a hundred and ten pages
So we had a long way to go and basically used up all
21 pages of the script that we had in the first section of the movie
So by the time we got to our second location, which was Morocco. We were playing catch-up
So Ridley Scott here has got Russell Crowe who's on his back legs being like I know what I'm doing
I just don't know what you're doing. I don't know what the crew's doing. I don't know what this film's doing
I don't know where we're all what we're doing, right? Mm-hmm Ridley sat him down and gone. Look, I hear what you're saying script
But how about me and you we really get into this? Yeah, right and we get into it you help me write it
I help you write it we get these things going on. We do XY and Z. Yeah
There's like a little behind-the-scenes documentary that I've been watching. It's
Six parts each parts like an hour long and it goes like really in-depth. It's amazing. God bless DVD extras
Yeah, it's amazing and the the scene where Russell Crowe is
Traveling back from Germania. So he's going back from like the German borders to Spain goes back to Spain on two horses
Yeah, he rides a horse to death
He's like battered beyond belief when he gets there his wife and child have been burned and nailed to a crucifix
It's such such an affecting scene. It's horrible and he nails it. He nails it nails it to the wall
He's got snot on command dude. This is where I'm going with this Ridley
And him had this big thing about the snot and the amount of snot that Russell Crowe could produce
It was the the way that this is described in this interview is harrowing because I was watching it and I was like
This is a car crash. You can't be sitting there as Russell Crowe in a like a tuxedo
He's all up. Yeah, so then as I was walking up towards the house
I started doing a bit of snot but it was a bit too much and then I had like a spider's web snot between my
Hands and then more hands and it was like just webbing everywhere. And then I was like Ridley
I'm gonna go and kiss me wife's foot
No, don't do that. No, don't do that because I've set up light in 20 feet away
So don't go and kiss the wife's foot and he's like now I'm gonna do it mate
I've got to go kiss her foot because I failed me
I failed my wife once and it I've gone northern
Wife once and if I do it I've come all this way and I don't like say goodbye to her. I failed her again
He's correct. He is correct. He's correct. And you know what Ridley said
No
And then Russell Crowe did it anyway and was like, yeah, that's a great idea that is mate
Right. This is what Ridley annoys me. I love it
There's a quote from Russell Crowe that I love it comes from the making of this film amazing
And it's it's only I've had to Google it just now, right?
where he was talking about the some of the lines where he sat with Commodus and some of the lines
When they're in the arena and he goes my name is Maximus Decimus Viridius father to a murdered son husband
Yes, and it's mint and the hands in the score is going dude
Russell Crowe didn't like bits of that script so he had to get him changed
Yeah
And there's bits in there that he's still to this day thinks a corny as all hell
It doesn't matter because it just he carries it
Yeah, but his quote was to the writer your lines are garbage
But luckily I'm the greatest actor in the world and I can even make garbage sound good
The thing is if you read that line sincerely
Yeah, he's a d*** but if you read it with the heavy note of self-aware sarcasm, but it was no doubt delivered with he's f***ing hilarious
It's that Australian humor right that no one else in the world can get away with just dry irony
But it's also confident as all hell
I can't say that in an American accent because you're immediately you're ostracized certain Australian accent everyone's like hey
Speaking of Russell Crowe, I know he's a divisive factor
There are lots of people who say he's got an angry face or they don't like him
I've got a list of his injuries that he sustained on this film. It's insane. Amazing got dislocated his hip
Teared his he tore his Achilles tendon. Oh my god
He's got grade four tears in both Achilles tendons. She's broke his foot. He popped a bicep tendon out of its socket
That's disgusting broke his face and broke his shoulder
outstanding
Everything that you just said is awful
There was no trigger warning there. I get when you said dislocated hip right because that sounds that's pelvic damage
That's the worst thing I can think of you can't sit you can't lie down. How do you get comfortable? You don't right?
I've done some background on Ross a crow as well. You've got his list of injuries here
He might be my favorite person that's ever existed
so
Tigers
Are they good co-stars?
Are they good co-stars? This is the question that we imagine not right because they always say never work with kids or animals, right?
Yeah, and like I tried filming a cat once yeah, and it could not give a fuck about direction
Okay, so now picture that with tigers. Yeah on chains
That is being manhandled by two human adults right that's who is in control of a tiger on a chain, okay?
Rob let me ask you a quick question if you were
You ever think about building a big old Coliseum set, you know for you and the hordes of extras that you're paying
Hundreds of thousands of dollars to the leading actors are earning millions to work in you know
And then let I don't have that kind of budget in my sex life. Okay. Yeah fair fair
And then have you ever thought about me? I don't know maybe letting four tigers on retractable chains
Out to really sell the scene again. Don't have that budget for my sex life. All right
Well, you ever think about how small that set gets and how fast it shrinks when you have four
Bengal tigers on chains
Actively chasing your lead actors in this massive set the set is tiny
Buddy it is miniscule now you have like a four foot radius around the edge of the Coliseum
That is not the tiger kill zone, right? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. So I hadn't considered this all
Right up until Ridley Scott said in this behind the scenes documentary. They're so quick
And that's what you gotta be aware of
Tigers Ridley
Yeah, they're tigers now literally 11 feet long and nothing but muscle
You you got to stay aware because if they get a hold of you you're dead before the animal handler gets there
Yes, obviously. They're tigers Ridley. Because it's a tiger and you're being mauled
That man is not going to step in the middle and go boys settle down here
This is a film that we're making let's think of the careers. Let's think of the job
There's a release date in six months tigers
No, if there is if there's one human on the planet capable of punching out a tiger
I would put my money on Russell Crowe
Dude, this is where the Russell Crowe tidbit comes in
Because the documentary what hard cuts to Russell Crowe close up just going
I was just drawn to these creatures and it's like buddy stay away from the tigers
There was a little running joke with the cast on this film on how many times Russell Crowe had to dive out of the way of a tiger attack
And the saying that he said was
I mean that was a bit close and it's like yes, buddy
Because you're you're stood entirely too close to the tiger to do an actual tiger attack
You're stood entirely too close to the tiger to do an off-camera quip pretending to be Steve Irwin
Let's not do that because you might die
I love him so much. He's incredible. I want to I want to talk about the other main actor before we do
Can we just do our little mid-roll advert reel? Yeah, let's do it. Let's get into it
We'll talk about the sponsor of this week's episode. Yeah, buddy and this week we are sponsored by the every movie ever podcast
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Yeah, should we get back to the film? Yeah, let's do that one because those those boys sound like oh don't listen
Great actors on this film, right? Yes, buddy. There's one that I really want to well
There's a couple on it. Whackin Phoenix is brilliant. And I think this is his first
This is the first time I saw how brilliant he could be
And yeah, it's a level of brilliance. He doesn't actually achieve all that regularly nowadays. I beg to differ
I beg to differ. He's very very good in a lot of his recent stuff
I don't know if he's as good as he is in this. Okay, I have I have different thoughts
I don't know whether or not i'm just expecting it. I maybe i'm expecting it from him. So i'm like, yeah
I'm waiting for the magic trick. Yeah, and there's the card. All right, always close-up magic
It's always close-up magic with you. It's insane
It's insane good analogy. It's a good analogy. The other guy I want to mention is really important is oliver reed
Speaking of uh speaking of performances that are blisteringly good
Uh, you remember earlier when I said
Ridley scott reminds me of you a little bit right the last nail in the coffin for me that was like, you know what?
Ridley scott might be a dude. He might be a dude right he tricked
Whackin Phoenix
What into her into his amazing performance?
So obviously this is like whacking's first major production, right? Yeah
He's been he's done he's done bits and bobs
There's but not much been a child actor for his entire childhood like he's been doing stuff all over the place as as leaf
Phoenix, of course. Yeah leaf. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
He's been doing he's been doing bits all over the place and obviously Ridley cast him and was like, yep
You are comodus. Yep. You are gonna do this and you are gonna be incredible whacking freaked out
He was wigging out. Yeah, it wouldn't surprise me. I've got a massive i've got a big chunk of stuff from whacking who goes into
how
Ridley tricked him. Is it true? He fainted at one point. Yes, right. Okay. Tell me about that
So he he was down to nerves unable to do anything physically visibly shaking
Passes out because of the stress of everything that is going on around him
He's just unable to get takes done unable to get anything anything out. It's just you know
I mean, it's it's one of these things where it's built up in his head so much
Yeah, that it is now a crippling performance anxiety literally literal crippling anxiety monster that stood in front of him
It's his first big break. So i've got this little bit from whacking phoenix here. You ready? Yeah
I was so green
I'd obviously been acting since I was a kid, but I'd never been part of a major production
When I arrived on set for gladiator, honestly, I was so sick. I was shaking
I couldn't believe the size of the location
Just how many trucks there were and I was terrified like really truly terrified
I couldn't do the first scene
I was literally visibly shaking and I couldn't get through the dialogue. My voice was quivering
And ridley scott kept rolling and it was just take after take after take
And I can't remember how many takes exactly we did just take after take for hours on end
Right and at the end of the film after everything was done and dusted the film had wrapped
Ridley turned to wacky and said you do know that I didn't have any film on the camera until like the last five takes, right?
Oh and because ridley knew that it wouldn't be beneficial to wacky
Right for him to just say let's just rehearse it. Let's just see how we get on
Yeah, he had to make wacky feel as if they were actively filming and he was asking the crew
And the the rest of the cast to keep up the act and keep doing the same shot over and over and over because he knew
It was the only way for me to get to a place of feeling comfortable and I was just so amazed by that
And if that buddy is that from ridley scott or is that from wacky?
That's from wacky and phoenix. So wacky and phoenix spoke about how ridley scott literally got the entire cast and crew
to commit to doing hours of takes with no film on the cameras
To make sure that wacky got the performance that he did that's mind-blowing to me
And that is 1000 something that you would do for someone that you cared about. Here's the thing
It's something i've I used to do all the time, but it's the it's the reverse and I I swear it's bullsh** what ridley's saying
What I used to do with artists in the studio, right?
Yeah, is you tell them you're not recording
And you record it because you always record everything. Yeah, the idea that you get wacky and phoenix
You get everyone set everything's ready. Yeah, and you tell him you're filming but don't yeah
Yeah, my question is what happens when you then watch with your eyes?
An incredible unrepeatable performance and wacky turns around and goes. Oh my god. I cracked it
I really got it there. I don't know how I did it, but that's the one. Yeah, can I see it back?
What do you say to him then? Uh, no, it's on tape
Right what you do instead is you film all of them, right?
You waste a mile of film right and then when he's feeling like the end of it you tell him
You only recorded the last five so he feels better about having done 50
Okay, I can't I see where you're coming from. It's a nice thing to tell an actor
Who's feeling a little bit like they should the bed to go?
No, no, don't worry buddy. Right. I only had it rolling for the last five. There's no way on god's earth
I would ever let anyone do their thing and then me not catch it because that's literally my job
Right, so your your thing is audio and I understand that with audio unless you're recording to tape, which is wildly expensive
Yeah, you can afford the the the disc space
To let it record for two hours. It's different and I trust Ridley Scott. I know it I know what you're saying is true
Yeah, it's just an insane difference
And the way I used to work because I would as with many times go in and go just go in and rehearse it
And then i'd lean over and just hit record. Yeah, you've done it to me countless times. It's infuriating
Yeah
You'd be surprised how many times the final vocal includes a couple of lines from that those rehearsals though. It's it's ridiculous
You've done it to me loads. Um, I love you for it, but also
You
It's the fact that that Ridley put himself and the entire production a little bit out of their way
To make sure that Joaquin did what he knew Joaquin could do
Even when he stood there shaking quivering can't get his dialogue out
Can't focus can't get anything done because the anxiety and Ridley's like, yeah, let's just go again man. Keep it rolling
Let's just go man. Just keep it rolling good man. How lovely is that to have an entire crew? Just have your back
For hours on end. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah
Yeah, I know I get it. It's also their job and it yeah
It's their job also it reminded me of you when I was a little bit like, you know
What Ridley Scott might be a dude and not just someone who can never pick scripts, you know what I mean?
Yeah, he's such a he's such a bad curator. Yeah, he's awful really is right
I there's tons of stuff that i've done that we can't get into because time
CGI of this film's insane
There's some facts in here where it is literally they had 2 000 extras
Right and these they CGI'd for the coliseum crowd. They CGI'd up to 70 000
people
All of them, I mean all of them milling about all of them cheering and jeering
The spectacle of this film is there's no point us waxing lyrical about it
You've just got you've got to watch it and you have to it's the year 2000
Yeah, uh, and the matrix has only just come out and you're like, yeah
It's all about the future and then you watch this and you're like, no, it's all about the past. Yeah
Like we could have done a three-hour show about
The the mechanical making of it. Oh, yeah thousand but realistically just go watch the film dude
Like there is there is documentaries on the miniatures that were built for this film that are longer than the film directors cut
Right i'm being say i've watched one and I got to the end of it and was like wow
So essentially they built a miniature put a bit of CGI in it. Awesome
It's an incredible watch but also if we're going to sit here and talk about it with get a textbook
Do you know what I mean? Get a notebook 100% we're taking notes bud the thing that I find most interesting and most relevant about this film
Watching it this week
Especially with how I feel today, which is super panicked
And super like i've looked like the world has changed forever and it's it everything is worse now
It might be it might not be is uh, there's an it well exactly
There's an interview with Ridley Scott and he he specifies that the the hidden dagger that comodus pulls out of his sleeve
During the final duel is the same one that he uses to stab maximus in the back of the lung before the fight
So they're they're both killed by the same weapon. Yeah
So they're both killed the same way. Yeah now
It kind of sets up
The two main characters in this film because you can see comodus is an antagonist and he is
Yeah, but he's also got a point
Yes, but comodus is an external validation seeking
victim complex kind of grief denier, okay, while maximus is
Totally internally validated. Yeah
Very self-aware grief acceptor. Yes, and they both die by the same weapon. Yes, but both men lost the future
That they were certain was gonna happen. They did comodus was certain. He was gonna be emperor
Maximus was certain he was gonna retire and spend his retirement with his wife and kids and that changed
It did right life came along and went no yourself. Mm-hmm
The differences in their story in this film all depend on how they react to that
It does maximus accepts his grief. He mourns his family
He talks about his family with his mates. He recognizes that
Things are really bad right now, but they're not going to be bad forever because he'll see his family again in the afterlife
He's got he's got that acceptance of his loss. Yeah, he accepts his loss comodus denies his loss
He fights against it. Yeah, no, I won't accept that loss. I won't take that loss on the chin
I won't take it as a learning moment. I will say nah, no, no, no, I'm gonna steal it back
Yeah, that's not right. That's that's illegal. That's that's cheating
Maximus has an inherent sense of confidence. Whereas comodus
Only values himself by how other people value him. Whoa
Looks to the people of Rome. Why don't you love me looks to his dad? Why why what's wrong with me?
Well, how can you not see how brilliant I am? Yeah, yeah maximus accepts his limitations and his vulnerabilities
There's a scene where he's chatting with lucilla connie connie nielsen's character
He's like what do you expect me to do about this? I am a slave. Yeah, I'm not in a position
Yeah, where I can influence this this isn't something I have any control over
So I don't feel any guilt about what's going on and I don't feel like this it's not
Like on the back of your sobriety coin grant me the serenity to understand what I can change what I can't and the wisdom to know
The difference right? Yeah, definitely and he's like I can't whereas comodus is going around going
I'm the emperor of rome and it it has to happen my way. It's my way or the highway
I have the power. I have the control the way that the way that they're both portrayed
Both of them are relatable
Like obviously one's a slave one of them's an emperor of rome
Yeah, but they're one of them's quite like likable and quite friendly and quite honorable the other one's a detestable little worm
But like both relatable and they're both related that way. They're both betrayed with their own strong will
and the director's cut that we both watched
There's tons of extra little tidbits that really pepper. Yeah the character development so that you see the struggles that they're having
Yeah, when their the mask slips a little bit, you know, I mean this director's cut is a brilliant
Director's cut for people who've seen the theatrical
Yes, watch the theatrical and if you enjoy it next time you watch the film a few years later
Watch the director's cut and you'll go. Oh, wow. I appreciate that. Well my theatrical cut only showed up in the last couple days
I watched the director's cut twice and I ordered I didn't know where else to get the theatrical cut from so I ordered the vhs
And uh, it showed up like yesterday. Haven't had time to watch it yet. Yeah, but I will do
Right, and it'll be great
I think I think just briefly and i'll wrap up that point that
Terrible things happen to both these men and the future that they were certain of is taken away from them
And the only difference between their stories is that one of them
accepts that loss
And recognizes that they will the good days will happen again. Yeah, but not yet
Yeah, and they are active and they're kind and kindness is a really
Really powerful strength when you've got tough times like maximus it really
Truly is and it's it's what will get him and all of us through when inevitably life comes along and goes
Now that thing you were getting now, you're not
If that isn't a poignant lesson for what's happening right now
Right everywhere
Just being a little bit kinder
Might help right everyone just get through the struggles, right? And that's why for me
This is the perfect blockbuster popcorn template because it was the first blockbuster I saw
And it went here is a woman getting cut in half by a sword
Nailed onto a wheel and here is a man fighting tigers
But also there's this that's there if you care for it, okay, but we're gonna bury it so you don't have to look at it
Yeah, it's only there if you go looking for it. I love that
See my first blockbuster was jaws and it was big shark
Head politicians also massive subtext if you want to dive into this one, buddy. Yeah, that was a good one
I love that. These are our two blockbusters. We're gonna have to do jaws at some point soon man
We really are we'll dig into that one. How much did this make it the cinema?
So it had a budget of 103 how much do you think it made? Give me give me I know this was huge
I know this was huge because this started a spree of like historical action drama movies like troy
300 heaven 300 300
300 heaven 300 300 you couldn't move for him and the only way that would have happened
Is if this was incredibly profitable. Yeah massive
So i'm gonna say 300 million way more it made
465.4 million worldwide
Yeah, I know and it only took 24 years to get a sequel
Okay, buddy
Someone's still recovering from covenant speaking of speaking of awful sequels. Would you like to play a game? I would love to buddy
What we're doing? We've done a couple of perhaps ill-advised sequels this year. Yeah, aiden romulus
Let's not the crow reboot remake sequel. Sure joker 2
Great film how dare you i'll die in this hill i'll die in this hill. So here's here's my point
What if we did that with a band?
Would you be interested in starting with me? Mm-hmm the beetles two
Yes, buddy, right. Okay. How's this work? I'm thinking we could we could have different slightly different song titles
So we wouldn't get sued right so like hell on the dick
Right, okay or all you need is a significant pay rise in therapy. Yeah, buddy
Uh
Instead of help I was thinking you could have I told you i'm fine already. Oh, that's a good one
Told you i'm fine already
Don't need nobody. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What about instead of let it be?
Fuck it off
Fuck it off. Fuck it off. Yeah, fuck it off
All right, it's like a deep album cut but he is coming
out
Wow rather than she's leaving home. Okay, that's a good one. What about this one?
We all live in a purple aeroplane a purple aeroplane water ball is myself you absolute bastard
What about the uh, the already slightly problematic song that ringo sings called don't you know, I mean boys
Girls and we just call it girls and now it's a slightly more problematic song that ringo sings
Okay, okay. I had one I had one for this and this i'm gonna be honest. This is why I brought the whole game
Okay, white guy screaming in the mid afternoon
Wow, yeah, you've got no wings. You'll need a big balloon
All right, white guy screaming in the mid afternoon, yeah, that's that's my final play
All right. I've got one final one. I think we can close the show on this one. You ready? Right?
Right there goes the moon
That's that's moon crash by uh, yeah, I love this game dude this game is endless like legitimately
It goes the moon's just moon crash
You're about moonfall the movie moon falls. Yeah, I was gonna say moon crash might be better though
Why didn't they use that as the theme song? Yeah, what you're writing gladiator 2000 ridley scott
um
Because it's sword and sandal when I first watched it
It would have been like a six because I was like, yes fine. It's it's a fine action
It's three hours of my life that i'm gonna go. Yeah, that's you know, dusty. That's pretty good
love sand
Uh, yeah, snotty russell crocus in the foot. Can't get that image out my brain
Uh, but then obviously like watching it again really paying attention to it
I'm just like watching it genuinely being able to relate to the two characters that are warring at each other and knowing that i've been in
In both of their shoes at some point i've been both these people i've what you tried to f**k your sister. That's gross ben
10
Oh, I wish we could do this but like play it straight face, you know what I mean?
Because that would be devastating to my reputation. Uh fat 10 has to be fat. Yeah, i'm the same
Uh, you can tell me all the things that are wrong with it
You can tell me all the reasons that you don't enjoy it and i'll agree with you
I will agree with you. Of course, and i'll still give it a 10. It's involuntary. I'm just like that's nice
But I really like it. Oh, you can see the bit that flipped the chariot and this bit
It looks like a hydraulics. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, you can brilliant. Do you know what else you can see?
I love it tigers mate four of them
Four real tigers running about after rossel crow. Yeah
Oh, what were you concerned about a chariot? Fine. Just one just one comment corner
Okay this week. Yeah, uh, and it's because christina delicade
Okay, I don't know. It's uh, because christina delicadena cadena
Um, okay eight days ago and we recorded and we said we would definitely do it this week. Yeah
And i'm really happy. We've got time this week. Excellent. Lovely. You ready? Yeah, hit me with it
Hi ben and rob christina here. I just listened to your latest episode and I wanted to send a few words to you too
so this is in response to
Our
We need to talk episode about launching the patreon. Okay, she says two years ago
I took the chance to accept a new job that implied moving to another country with my 14 year old son
Wow, i'm originally from a spanish-speaking country and moved to the u.s
Which adds a little complexity to the situation? Okay
It's a big change mostly because I didn't know anybody and it's still a little hard to have my friends and family so far away
Loneliness can be a really hard thing to deal with and here is where you two with your podcast came into my life
I don't even remember how in the world they ended up finding you but i'm so glad that I did
Oh, i've heard so many other people say it feels like I have a date with friends every week
And I look forward to my monday mornings to start my week listening to you talk be silly and sarcastic
And share that dark humor. I enjoy so much. Isn't that the way true friends talk?
this week's episode
about the uh
The struggles we were having yeah had me in tears
You both are so lucky to have each other and more lucky to know and appreciate that
I never thought I was going to join patreon, but you made it happen. Oh, follow you guys there
I'm happy you found a solution that makes you happy
But also allow us your friends from way back to keep having the real content
The one not so stressed about what is trendy or that will attract the masses
I just want to hear how you were doing while also talking about some movie that I may or may not know
Anyway, I was a little worried about what news you were going to share last week sounded like you two were tired of the podcast
So again, i'm happy there is a way you can still enjoy it
And by the way, if you ask me, I think you're doing a wonderful job. Not no need to stress about it
Well first off christina
Love you. Thanks for that. That's incredible. Uh, that's incredibly sweet. I cannot imagine
How hard it must be to uproot your entire life to a country?
That's not speaking your native tongue and then yeah, you like commit to that long term because that's insane
I did japan for two years and it was
Rough you ended up working as a friend escort. Yeah, watered down hooker. I was legit. I was just a rent a friend
God that's so that's so weird to say out loud. I was 18
Working for alcohol. Yeah in a friend for hire bar. Yeah, I was getting paid 250 quid a month
Oh Ben I used to make twice that in a day mate. Yeah, you were 18 though. I wasn't 18. Yeah, yeah, dude
Same here. And also we're both in the same spot. We're both in our mom's basement now, aren't we? That's what I mean
Christina that's that's honestly it's lovely. Sorry to worry you about the the where we were going with it
It was more i'm not I intended to
I'm a manipulation ploy. All right, Ridley calm down. Jesus christ. Everyone's whacking into you, isn't they?
No, we we are genuinely so grateful to have our audience and since we've started patreon
I'm just going to jinx it right now and say that things have been much much easier
That sadly is all the time we have for this week
It is and I am gutted because i've been having a whale of a time mate. This is exactly what I need recording so much better now
And yeah, dude, honestly so much fun guys. Thank you so much for hanging out with us
You have no idea how much this means for us both. We love you from the bottom of our hearts
Thank you for spending time with us. We'll see you next week. What are we doing next week next week, mate?
We are doing benjamin button. Yeah
Yay
Let's hope it ages as well as brad pitt does in that film
Oh, and that's why we get paid the small bucks. That's why we get paid pennies buddy
Ben is now going to thank you for spending an hour of your week
With us, especially at the start of your week. We know a lot of you listen on a monday
By wrapping up the thoughts themes and feelings of this movie
Into a little you know monday motivational pep talk to help you get through your week
It's going to be a difficult week for us all and ben is going to make it all better
While I just tell you to do what society has always told you to do and probably always will tell you to do
consume
Do I go?
Like wisdom me or do I go edge lordy?
Or go wisdom me so the movie obviously you've got the two ways that you can handle any sort of grief your life
Changes is out of your control. You have two ways to handle it your comodus or your maximus
I would always recommend choosing maximus, but just know that if you do happen on to be on comoduses path
There is always a way out
You know, I mean there's always a maximus there to stab you in the fucking throat in front of a crowd of people
That do not give a shit about your existence
Jokes on you. It was the edgelord path all along there are two wolves inside your buddy
One of them is mean and the other one is a sigma and they're both cats