WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.120 Welcome to Pamoja Podcast, a ministry of Life 00:00:03.120 --> 00:00:05.500 of Christ International where we build stronger 00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:08.539 lives, deeper faith, and Christ -centered homes. 00:00:08.919 --> 00:00:12.160 One story, one message, and one revelation at 00:00:12.160 --> 00:00:15.960 a time. I'm your host, Barry Mwamba. Today we 00:00:15.960 --> 00:00:18.899 continue our series, When the Strong Get Tired. 00:00:19.359 --> 00:00:22.100 Over the last four episodes, we have been exposing 00:00:22.100 --> 00:00:24.379 some of the hidden battles that quietly weaken 00:00:24.379 --> 00:00:27.440 strong believers. Battles that often happen long 00:00:27.440 --> 00:00:30.390 before a person falls. Long before a marriage 00:00:30.390 --> 00:00:34.450 breaks. Long before a ministry collapses. Long 00:00:34.450 --> 00:00:37.890 before faith begins to fade. In episode one, 00:00:38.149 --> 00:00:41.310 we talked about physical exhaustion. How fatigue 00:00:41.310 --> 00:00:43.590 has become one of the enemy's most sophisticated 00:00:43.590 --> 00:00:46.710 weapons. How many believers are not under attack 00:00:46.710 --> 00:00:49.429 because they are weak, but because they are tired. 00:00:49.969 --> 00:00:54.670 Tired minds. Tired bodies. Tired emotions. Tired 00:00:54.670 --> 00:00:58.520 spirits. In episode two, we talked about spiritual 00:00:58.520 --> 00:01:01.700 weariness, the danger of losing our awe of God, 00:01:02.460 --> 00:01:04.659 the danger of continuing religious activities 00:01:04.659 --> 00:01:07.099 while our hearts quietly drift away from His 00:01:07.099 --> 00:01:10.599 presence. Because people rarely abandon God suddenly, 00:01:11.420 --> 00:01:14.599 most people drift away gradually. In episode 00:01:14.599 --> 00:01:17.459 3, we discovered that many strong people become 00:01:17.459 --> 00:01:20.700 trapped by shame. Not trapped because God abandoned 00:01:20.700 --> 00:01:23.180 them, but trapped because they believed their 00:01:23.180 --> 00:01:26.409 failure was greater than God's mercy. Then in 00:01:26.409 --> 00:01:29.609 episode 4, we explored how great people quietly 00:01:29.609 --> 00:01:33.290 fall. We learned that education may elevate you, 00:01:33.709 --> 00:01:36.609 talent may position you, opportunity may promote 00:01:36.609 --> 00:01:40.590 you, anointing may open doors. But only character 00:01:40.590 --> 00:01:43.650 can sustain what God gives you, because blessings 00:01:43.650 --> 00:01:45.849 without character eventually become burdens. 00:01:46.829 --> 00:01:49.730 And today, we arrive at another battlefield, 00:01:50.469 --> 00:01:53.430 one that has wounded countless believers. One 00:01:53.430 --> 00:01:55.829 that has quietly weakened many strong Christians. 00:01:56.549 --> 00:01:59.769 One that few churches talk about. Today I want 00:01:59.769 --> 00:02:03.969 to talk about when the strong get tired. Episode 00:02:03.969 --> 00:02:08.370 5. The weight of disappointment. Because sometimes 00:02:08.370 --> 00:02:10.689 the greatest battles are not the ones we fight 00:02:10.689 --> 00:02:13.669 against sin. Sometimes the greatest battles are 00:02:13.669 --> 00:02:15.770 the ones we fight after being wounded by people 00:02:15.770 --> 00:02:18.789 we trusted. The disappointment that comes when 00:02:18.789 --> 00:02:22.479 people fail us. When leaders fail us. When friends 00:02:22.479 --> 00:02:25.879 betray us. When family members hurt us. When 00:02:25.879 --> 00:02:28.719 church members wound us. When people we trusted 00:02:28.719 --> 00:02:32.139 break our confidence. And before we go any further, 00:02:32.639 --> 00:02:35.759 I want to ask you a question. Who disappointed 00:02:35.759 --> 00:02:40.360 you? Who hurt you? Who betrayed you? Who lied 00:02:40.360 --> 00:02:44.099 about you? Who rejected you? Who wounded your 00:02:44.099 --> 00:02:47.219 heart? Because every person listening to me today 00:02:47.219 --> 00:02:51.740 has somebody. A friend. A family member. a church 00:02:51.740 --> 00:02:56.780 member, a spouse, a pastor, a leader, a co -worker. 00:02:57.780 --> 00:03:00.819 Someone whose name still produces pain. Someone 00:03:00.819 --> 00:03:04.039 you avoid. Someone you don't want around you. 00:03:04.560 --> 00:03:07.699 Someone you still struggle to forgive. Maybe 00:03:07.699 --> 00:03:11.280 it happened yesterday. Maybe last year. Maybe 00:03:11.280 --> 00:03:14.840 20 years ago. But if we're not careful, that 00:03:14.840 --> 00:03:17.020 disappointment can become one of the most effective 00:03:17.020 --> 00:03:20.139 weapons of the enemy. Because the enemy understands 00:03:20.139 --> 00:03:22.879 something. If he cannot stop people from coming 00:03:22.879 --> 00:03:25.919 to Christ, he will try to make Christ's representatives 00:03:25.919 --> 00:03:29.599 disappoint them. And throughout history, he has 00:03:29.599 --> 00:03:33.219 done exactly that. We have seen false teachers, 00:03:33.819 --> 00:03:37.379 manipulative leaders, financial scandals, sexual 00:03:37.379 --> 00:03:41.639 scandals, church politics, hypocrisy, spiritual 00:03:41.639 --> 00:03:45.520 abuse, power struggles. And every time one of 00:03:45.520 --> 00:03:49.219 those things is exposed, people walk away. Some 00:03:49.219 --> 00:03:52.509 leave church. Some leave ministry. Some leave 00:03:52.509 --> 00:03:56.569 prayer. Some leave God altogether. But listen 00:03:56.569 --> 00:03:59.550 carefully. The enemy's goal was never merely 00:03:59.550 --> 00:04:02.509 to corrupt one leader. The goal was to wound 00:04:02.509 --> 00:04:05.650 the faith of thousands. The goal was never merely 00:04:05.650 --> 00:04:08.830 to expose one hypocrite. The goal was to convince 00:04:08.830 --> 00:04:12.129 people that everyone is a hypocrite. And suddenly, 00:04:12.669 --> 00:04:15.189 a person's disappointment with a pastor becomes 00:04:15.189 --> 00:04:18.490 disappointment with God. A person's frustration 00:04:18.490 --> 00:04:21.180 with a church becomes frustration with Christ. 00:04:22.060 --> 00:04:25.459 A person's wound becomes unbelief. That is how 00:04:25.459 --> 00:04:28.759 the enemy plants seeds, not always through temptation, 00:04:29.480 --> 00:04:32.519 sometimes through disappointment. But disappointment 00:04:32.519 --> 00:04:35.600 itself is not the greatest danger. Bitterness 00:04:35.600 --> 00:04:39.699 is. Disappointment is the wound. Bitterness is 00:04:39.699 --> 00:04:43.680 the infection. A wound can heal. An infection 00:04:43.680 --> 00:04:47.560 spreads. And this is why Hebrews 12 -15 warns 00:04:47.560 --> 00:04:50.920 us, See to it that no bitter root grows up to 00:04:50.920 --> 00:04:54.540 cause trouble and defile many. Notice that Scripture 00:04:54.540 --> 00:04:57.420 does not warn us about disappointment. It warns 00:04:57.420 --> 00:05:00.720 us about the root. Because roots grow underground, 00:05:01.720 --> 00:05:06.339 quietly, silently, in darkness. And before we 00:05:06.339 --> 00:05:10.040 know it, disappointment becomes resentment. Resentment 00:05:10.040 --> 00:05:12.959 becomes bitterness. Bitterness becomes distance 00:05:12.959 --> 00:05:16.139 from God. And distance from God becomes spiritual 00:05:16.139 --> 00:05:20.199 fatigue. Maybe you still attend church. Maybe 00:05:20.199 --> 00:05:23.680 you still worship. Maybe you still serve. Maybe 00:05:23.680 --> 00:05:27.279 you still pray. But underneath the surface, there 00:05:27.279 --> 00:05:31.620 is a root. A root fed by memories. A root fed 00:05:31.620 --> 00:05:35.319 by pain. A root fed by disappointment. And that 00:05:35.319 --> 00:05:37.879 root is changing you. Maybe you no longer trust 00:05:37.879 --> 00:05:40.240 people. Maybe you struggle to celebrate others. 00:05:40.519 --> 00:05:43.339 Maybe you replay old conversations. Maybe you 00:05:43.339 --> 00:05:45.899 secretly enjoy seeing someone fail. Maybe you 00:05:45.899 --> 00:05:48.500 cannot hear their name without anger rising inside 00:05:48.500 --> 00:05:50.720 you. Maybe you still dream about what happened 00:05:50.720 --> 00:05:53.879 years ago. Those are warning signs. Because disappointment 00:05:53.879 --> 00:05:56.459 left untreated becomes resentment. Resentment 00:05:56.459 --> 00:05:59.000 left untreated becomes bitterness. And bitterness 00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:01.740 left untreated becomes distance from God. Let's 00:06:01.740 --> 00:06:04.100 look at three men who walked with Jesus. Three 00:06:04.100 --> 00:06:06.540 men who experienced disappointment. Three men 00:06:06.540 --> 00:06:08.800 who teach us what disappointment tries to do 00:06:08.800 --> 00:06:12.279 to every believer. First, Judas. Somewhere along 00:06:12.279 --> 00:06:14.480 the journey, disappointment entered his heart. 00:06:14.560 --> 00:06:17.300 His expectations no longer aligned with God's 00:06:17.300 --> 00:06:19.579 plan. Things were not unfolding the way he thought 00:06:19.579 --> 00:06:21.879 they should. Instead of bringing that disappointment 00:06:21.879 --> 00:06:24.439 into the light, he allowed it to grow in darkness. 00:06:24.879 --> 00:06:27.220 Disappointment became resentment. Resentment 00:06:27.220 --> 00:06:29.639 became bitterness. Bitterness began poisoning 00:06:29.639 --> 00:06:32.720 his heart. That is what bitterness does. It destroys 00:06:32.720 --> 00:06:35.279 a person from the inside before anyone notices 00:06:35.279 --> 00:06:38.120 it on the outside. Now look at Thomas. Thomas 00:06:38.120 --> 00:06:40.959 watched Jesus die. the one he trusted, the one 00:06:40.959 --> 00:06:43.360 he followed, the one he believed would change 00:06:43.360 --> 00:06:46.860 everything. Suddenly all hope seemed lost. Disappointment 00:06:46.860 --> 00:06:49.019 produced doubt. How many believers are there 00:06:49.019 --> 00:06:52.540 today? Not bitter, not rebellious, simply disappointed. 00:06:52.819 --> 00:06:54.939 And because they are disappointed, they struggle 00:06:54.939 --> 00:06:57.579 to believe again. Then there is Peter. Peter's 00:06:57.579 --> 00:06:59.959 disappointment was different. Peter was disappointed 00:06:59.959 --> 00:07:02.560 in himself. He promised Jesus he would never 00:07:02.560 --> 00:07:05.379 deny him. Yet he denied him three times. The 00:07:05.379 --> 00:07:07.620 weight of that failure crushed him. After the 00:07:07.620 --> 00:07:10.019 resurrection, Peter returned to fishing. Back 00:07:10.019 --> 00:07:12.680 to what he knew. Back to his old life. That is 00:07:12.680 --> 00:07:15.259 what disappointment often tries to do. It tries 00:07:15.259 --> 00:07:18.420 to pull us back. Back into old habits. Back into 00:07:18.420 --> 00:07:21.079 old identities. Back into old ways of living. 00:07:21.319 --> 00:07:24.120 But Jesus came looking for Peter. Peter drifted. 00:07:24.180 --> 00:07:27.220 Thomas doubted. Judas became bitter. Yet Jesus 00:07:27.220 --> 00:07:29.800 pursued the ones willing to be restored. Because 00:07:29.800 --> 00:07:32.079 disappointment wants to create distance between 00:07:32.079 --> 00:07:34.899 us and God. But Jesus keeps coming after us. 00:07:35.079 --> 00:07:37.360 And perhaps no biblical character answers this 00:07:37.360 --> 00:07:40.000 better than Job. If anyone had a reason to become 00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:43.160 bitter, it was Job. He lost his children, his 00:07:43.160 --> 00:07:46.379 wealth, his health, his reputation, his security. 00:07:46.660 --> 00:07:49.040 Then his friends arrived, not to comfort him, 00:07:49.180 --> 00:07:52.240 but to accuse him. They added accusation to pain, 00:07:52.660 --> 00:07:55.319 judgment to suffering, disappointment to heartbreak. 00:07:55.540 --> 00:07:58.180 Yet Job refused to allow disappointment to become 00:07:58.180 --> 00:08:01.259 bitterness. Did he cry? Yes. Did he question? 00:08:01.439 --> 00:08:04.980 Yes. Did he struggle? Yes. But he never abandoned 00:08:04.980 --> 00:08:07.620 God. Instead of allowing disappointment to drive 00:08:07.620 --> 00:08:09.939 him away from God, he allowed disappointment 00:08:09.939 --> 00:08:12.500 to drive him deeper into God. And eventually 00:08:12.500 --> 00:08:14.920 God restored him. That is the question for all 00:08:14.920 --> 00:08:17.399 of us today. Is your disappointment driving you 00:08:17.399 --> 00:08:20.480 away from God or deeper into God? I learned this 00:08:20.480 --> 00:08:23.139 lesson personally. When I was around 18 years 00:08:23.139 --> 00:08:25.800 old, one of my closest friends lied about me. 00:08:25.899 --> 00:08:29.180 I was deeply disappointed, deeply wounded, deeply 00:08:29.180 --> 00:08:32.059 hurt. And without realizing it, the disappointment 00:08:32.059 --> 00:08:34.759 started producing something dangerous, bitterness. 00:08:35.120 --> 00:08:38.240 I replayed the situation in my mind again and 00:08:38.240 --> 00:08:41.659 again and again. The anger grew, the resentment 00:08:41.659 --> 00:08:44.820 grew, the rejection grew, the desire for revenge 00:08:44.820 --> 00:08:48.320 grew, and what I thought was justice was actually 00:08:48.320 --> 00:08:50.980 bitterness taking root. Bitterness behaves like 00:08:50.980 --> 00:08:53.539 an underground root system. It grows quietly 00:08:53.539 --> 00:08:56.320 in darkness, but eventually destroys everything 00:08:56.320 --> 00:08:59.000 above the surface. It changes how you see people, 00:08:59.299 --> 00:09:02.120 how you see leaders. how you see church, how 00:09:02.120 --> 00:09:05.120 you see God. And that is the danger. The person 00:09:05.120 --> 00:09:07.600 who hurt you may have moved on. The person who 00:09:07.600 --> 00:09:09.740 disappointed you may not even remember what they 00:09:09.740 --> 00:09:12.820 did. The person who wounded you may already be 00:09:12.820 --> 00:09:15.059 living their life. But you are still carrying 00:09:15.059 --> 00:09:17.419 the weight. And many believers think the person 00:09:17.419 --> 00:09:20.059 is their problem. The real problem is the root. 00:09:20.480 --> 00:09:22.580 Because bitterness does not imprison the person 00:09:22.580 --> 00:09:25.740 who hurt you, it imprisons you. Bitterness steals 00:09:25.740 --> 00:09:28.980 joy. Bitterness steals peace. Bitterness steals 00:09:28.980 --> 00:09:31.720 intimacy with God. Bitterness steals spiritual 00:09:31.720 --> 00:09:34.480 sensitivity. Bitterness steals freedom. That 00:09:34.480 --> 00:09:37.220 is why the enemy loves disappointment. Not because 00:09:37.220 --> 00:09:39.820 of the event. Because of the root he hopes it 00:09:39.820 --> 00:09:42.440 will produce. And perhaps that is why so many 00:09:42.440 --> 00:09:45.080 strong believers become tired. Not because they 00:09:45.080 --> 00:09:47.399 stopped loving God. But because they have been 00:09:47.399 --> 00:09:49.960 carrying bitterness for years. One night while 00:09:49.960 --> 00:09:52.740 praying, the Holy Spirit revealed what was happening 00:09:52.740 --> 00:09:57.039 inside my heart. I cried. I repented. I asked 00:09:57.039 --> 00:10:00.970 him to help me forgive. Not formally. Not religiously, 00:10:01.309 --> 00:10:04.210 genuinely, from my heart. Then something happened. 00:10:04.549 --> 00:10:07.169 Something I have never forgotten. I felt something 00:10:07.169 --> 00:10:10.409 leave my heart. The heaviness disappeared. The 00:10:10.409 --> 00:10:13.629 bitterness left. The resentment left. The anger 00:10:13.629 --> 00:10:17.690 left. And suddenly, peace entered. Freedom entered. 00:10:18.250 --> 00:10:21.809 Joy entered. I started smiling. I could not explain 00:10:21.809 --> 00:10:24.110 it. It felt as if heaven had poured something 00:10:24.110 --> 00:10:27.490 over my soul. The Bible calls it the oil of joy. 00:10:27.669 --> 00:10:30.750 The oil that heals wounded hearts. The oil that 00:10:30.750 --> 00:10:33.370 restores what bitterness tried to destroy. The 00:10:33.370 --> 00:10:36.289 oil that breaks emotional chains. The oil that 00:10:36.289 --> 00:10:38.730 replaces heaviness with freedom. The next day 00:10:38.730 --> 00:10:41.330 I went to see my friend and told him, I forgive 00:10:41.330 --> 00:10:43.629 you. And that day I learned one of the greatest 00:10:43.629 --> 00:10:46.129 lessons of my Christian life. Forgiveness is 00:10:46.129 --> 00:10:48.509 not for the person who hurt you. Forgiveness 00:10:48.509 --> 00:10:50.870 is for the freedom of your own heart. Because 00:10:50.870 --> 00:10:53.149 disappointment can wound you, but bitterness 00:10:53.149 --> 00:10:55.610 will imprison you. And forgiveness breaks the 00:10:55.610 --> 00:10:58.539 prison. So let me ask you again, who are you 00:10:58.539 --> 00:11:00.960 carrying? Whose offense are you still carrying? 00:11:01.360 --> 00:11:03.659 Whose betrayal are you still carrying? Whose 00:11:03.659 --> 00:11:06.340 rejection are you still carrying? Whose disappointment 00:11:06.340 --> 00:11:08.720 are you still carrying? Because some of you have 00:11:08.720 --> 00:11:11.399 carried it for years, and what began as a wound 00:11:11.399 --> 00:11:14.580 has become a root. What began as disappointment 00:11:14.580 --> 00:11:17.600 has become bitterness. And the Holy Spirit is 00:11:17.600 --> 00:11:20.039 speaking to some hearts right now, not to condemn 00:11:20.039 --> 00:11:23.360 you, not to shame you, not to expose you, but 00:11:23.360 --> 00:11:26.779 to heal you. Because what bitterness builds Forgiveness 00:11:26.779 --> 00:11:29.980 can destroy. What resentment has planted, the 00:11:29.980 --> 00:11:32.659 Holy Spirit can uproot. What disappointment has 00:11:32.659 --> 00:11:35.860 wounded, God can heal. Now think about Esau. 00:11:36.139 --> 00:11:39.500 Esau had every reason to hate Jacob, every reason. 00:11:39.820 --> 00:11:43.279 Jacob deceived him. Jacob stole from him. Jacob 00:11:43.279 --> 00:11:46.159 betrayed his trust. Years later, Jacob approached 00:11:46.159 --> 00:11:49.919 him trembling with fear, expecting revenge, expecting 00:11:49.919 --> 00:11:53.399 judgment, expecting retaliation. Instead, Esau 00:11:53.399 --> 00:11:57.460 ran toward him, embraced him. forgave him, forgiveness 00:11:57.460 --> 00:12:01.080 won. Think about David. Saul hunted him, chased 00:12:01.080 --> 00:12:04.059 him, tried repeatedly to kill him. Then David 00:12:04.059 --> 00:12:06.940 found himself standing over Saul in a cave. One 00:12:06.940 --> 00:12:10.600 moment, one decision, one opportunity for revenge. 00:12:10.940 --> 00:12:14.059 But David refused. He chose mercy over bitterness. 00:12:14.580 --> 00:12:17.759 He chose God's heart over wounded emotions. He 00:12:17.759 --> 00:12:20.100 refused to allow resentment to cloud his soul. 00:12:20.379 --> 00:12:23.240 Think about the father of the prodigal son, rejected, 00:12:23.779 --> 00:12:26.990 embarrassed. publicly disappointed, wounded by 00:12:26.990 --> 00:12:29.929 the very son he loved. Yet he never stopped waiting, 00:12:30.429 --> 00:12:34.090 never stopped loving, never stopped hoping. Disappointment 00:12:34.090 --> 00:12:36.909 did not produce bitterness, it produced mercy. 00:12:37.250 --> 00:12:40.490 And above all, think about Jesus, betrayed by 00:12:40.490 --> 00:12:44.269 Judas, denied by Peter, abandoned by his disciples, 00:12:44.809 --> 00:12:47.710 rejected by his own people, crucified by those 00:12:47.710 --> 00:12:50.429 he came to save. Yet from the cross he said, 00:12:50.730 --> 00:12:53.370 Father forgive them. Jesus chose forgiveness 00:12:53.370 --> 00:12:56.860 over disappointment. Mercy over resentment. Love 00:12:56.860 --> 00:12:59.500 over bitterness. And perhaps that is the greatest 00:12:59.500 --> 00:13:01.980 lesson of all. The enemy wants disappointment 00:13:01.980 --> 00:13:05.059 to produce bitterness, but God wants disappointment 00:13:05.059 --> 00:13:07.580 to produce forgiveness. Because where forgiveness 00:13:07.580 --> 00:13:11.039 flows, healing follows. And where healing follows, 00:13:11.500 --> 00:13:15.159 the oil of joy returns. Maybe today, God is not 00:13:15.159 --> 00:13:17.840 asking you to change churches. Maybe he is not 00:13:17.840 --> 00:13:20.580 asking you to leave relationships. Maybe he is 00:13:20.580 --> 00:13:23.240 not asking you to run away. Maybe he is asking 00:13:23.240 --> 00:13:25.669 you to forgive. Maybe your next breakthrough 00:13:25.669 --> 00:13:28.590 is not in a new place. Maybe it is in a healed 00:13:28.590 --> 00:13:31.190 heart. Maybe your freedom is waiting on the other 00:13:31.190 --> 00:13:34.029 side of forgiveness. Let us pray. Father, in 00:13:34.029 --> 00:13:37.190 the name of Jesus, I pray for every wounded believer, 00:13:37.690 --> 00:13:40.570 every disappointed heart, every person carrying 00:13:40.570 --> 00:13:43.230 resentment, every person carrying bitterness, 00:13:43.769 --> 00:13:46.690 every person who has been hurt by family, friends, 00:13:47.090 --> 00:13:49.990 church members, leaders, or people they trusted. 00:13:50.549 --> 00:13:53.549 Father, expose every bitter root hidden in our 00:13:53.549 --> 00:13:56.919 hearts. heal every wound, break every chain of 00:13:56.919 --> 00:14:00.019 resentment, release every prisoner of unforgiveness. 00:14:00.379 --> 00:14:03.440 Pour upon your people the oil of joy, the oil 00:14:03.440 --> 00:14:06.899 that heals, the oil that restores, the oil that 00:14:06.899 --> 00:14:10.000 replaces heaviness with peace, the oil that restores 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:12.580 what bitterness tried to destroy. Give us the 00:14:12.580 --> 00:14:15.659 grace to forgive, the strength to release offenses, 00:14:15.740 --> 00:14:18.620 and the wisdom to protect our hearts. Keep our 00:14:18.620 --> 00:14:21.580 eyes fixed on Jesus. Strengthen those who are 00:14:21.580 --> 00:14:24.730 tired. Restore those who are wounded. and remind 00:14:24.730 --> 00:14:26.990 us that you remain faithful even when people 00:14:26.990 --> 00:14:54.210 fail. In Jesus' name, amen. Don't just live life, 00:14:54.590 --> 00:14:57.490 live it with purpose. God bless you and welcome 00:14:57.490 --> 00:14:58.110 to the journey.