WEBVTT

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Hi, what is the most interesting thing you've

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ever studied? Maybe it was history or science,

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maybe music, maybe mathematics. Well, for me,

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mathematics has provided a lifetime of fascinating

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questions. But let's face it, people are incredibly

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fascinating. Our bodies are a work of wonder.

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Our minds and emotions are beyond description.

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We are fearfully and wonderfully made. A number

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of years ago, I was involved in a mentoring program

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for young men in their 20s. And when I first

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started, I thought mentoring meant giving advice,

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sharing my experiences, offering solutions, helping

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them avoid mistakes. But a friend who helped

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start the program gave me some advice. Be overflowing

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with curiosity. He encouraged me to ask questions,

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such as, who are they? What are they hoping for?

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What are they afraid of? What experiences shape

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them? And my friend was right. The more curious

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I became, the more I realized how unique each

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person's story is. Every person carried experiences

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that I could not see from the outside. And the

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only way to uncover those stories was through

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curiosity. Curiosity opened the door to mutual

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understanding. We were able to understand each

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other in a deeper way, and that changed the path

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of the mentoring relationship. I've experienced

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something similar in marriage. My therapist challenges

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me to be curious about my wife, not just about

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what she thinks, but why she thinks it. Not just

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about what she says, but what experiences and

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emotions might be shaping those words. I know

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if I hear something or see something that does

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not sit right, it is easy for me to slip into

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prosecutor mode. Curiosity helps me leave that

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mindset behind. I've found that curiosity changes

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the conversation. Rather than preparing my next

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response, I start to trying to understand. Rather

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than assuming, I begin exploring. Rather than

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defending, I begin learning. I've come to believe

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that curiosity is a muscle that we can all develop.

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My curiosity muscle certainly has room to grow.

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And for me, mathematics has been one of the best

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places to exercise that muscle. For example,

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I've studied calculus for more than 40 years,

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and I'm still learning new things. There is always

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another pattern to be curious about, a fresh

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idea I had not considered, another connection

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waiting to be discovered. Over time, I've realized

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that that same habit that helps me discover new

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ideas in math helps me understand people more

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deeply. Both begin with a simple belief. There

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is more here than I currently see. The mindset

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that I bring to mathematics has slowly become

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the mindset that I bring to relationships. I

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want to know more. And it's been my experience

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that one of the greatest gifts curiosity gives

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us is not better answers, but it's a deeper appreciation

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for the people around us.