1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,280
Welcome back to Toys on Tap. This week we have an incredible artist coming on,

2
00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:09,800
Depressed Monsters, one of my favorite artists. You can see the journey in here,

3
00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:14,560
the ups and downs in Ryan's voice as he talks about how the brand started in the

4
00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:18,660
depths and how it continued through mountains and valleys and has continued

5
00:00:18,660 --> 00:00:23,740
to shine. It'd be a light for many of those around it and has been so good to

6
00:00:23,740 --> 00:00:28,080
see grow. If you want to jump on and support this podcast you can rate and

7
00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:32,240
review. Like, subscribe, wherever you get podcasts. You can throw us a follow on

8
00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:37,920
social media at Toys on Tap. Send us a review that tells me how much you love

9
00:00:37,920 --> 00:00:45,040
Toys on Tap. Now let's get to this week's episode of Toys on Tap.

10
00:00:45,040 --> 00:01:03,040
Yo, yo, yo. What's up, Depressed Monsters in the house. What's up, how you doing? Good, dude, I'm so stoked to have you.

11
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:07,680
Eurman's right in the background. Is this a studio? Yeah, this is my studio. I've been

12
00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:13,040
packaging orders today so it's a little messy but this is the studio. Dude, so sick.

13
00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:17,200
Thanks, man. Yeah, I'm glad to be here. This is awesome. I'm really, really stoked

14
00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:22,520
to talk to you today. What's cool is you aren't the typical artist that fits on

15
00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:27,800
because you do murals and shirts and all kinds of stuff and then you

16
00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:32,240
started making toys but I'm stoked because the toys are dope. You made stuffed

17
00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:38,400
animals and then just tracking your trajectory and how it

18
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:44,640
shifted a little bit from 2015 to like just clothing to now all of this empire

19
00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:51,520
style stuff. It's so sick to see it. Dude, that's like, man, thank you. It's

20
00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:55,280
weird to hear it from outside my own brain, you know? So like it's cool to

21
00:01:55,280 --> 00:02:00,520
see that you kind of looked through it and saw that. I think like the toy

22
00:02:00,520 --> 00:02:04,440
thing, like I just started as a fan of Toys, you know? And like that was the big

23
00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:07,920
reason why I wanted to even do any of this stuff is just because I have always

24
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:12,240
loved and collected toys and so it was cool to, you know, try it on my own and

25
00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:16,160
all that stuff. But yeah, thanks, man. That's super nice of you. I do want to

26
00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:21,240
dive into your love and desire for toys, obviously. This is toys. Thank you. But

27
00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:26,720
before we do that, please tell everyone who you are, what you do, plug yourself.

28
00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:33,920
Yeah, heck yeah. So my name is Ryan Bronti. I go by Depressed Monsters. It started

29
00:02:33,920 --> 00:02:39,520
in 2012, basically is what I say that the, you know, the brand was born just

30
00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,920
because that's when my grandfather passed. And that's when I started making

31
00:02:42,920 --> 00:02:47,680
little self portraits as a way to cope. And so I was doing like little

32
00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:51,920
watercolor paintings, you know, like I collected art. I loved art. I was really

33
00:02:51,920 --> 00:02:56,680
big into like the Mondo scene. So I was collecting like Ollie Moss, Mike Mitchell,

34
00:02:56,680 --> 00:03:00,720
Tyler Stow and then I started collecting a lot of oba, stuff like that, right? And

35
00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:04,480
so, you know, everybody that, I think everybody that loves art and collects

36
00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:08,800
art eventually wants to play around with it, I think, like for the most part. And

37
00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:13,120
so when my grandfather passed, I was like, you know, I kind of want to just like

38
00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:17,120
express myself in ways I've never really expressed myself. And so, you know, I've

39
00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:19,440
always drawn since I was a kid or whatever. And so I was like, I'm just

40
00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:23,520
going to start doing this as a way to just see my feelings out there. And this

41
00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:26,320
before I knew about art therapy and all that stuff, right? And so I started

42
00:03:26,320 --> 00:03:30,640
doing these little like universal monsters with these little uniform bodies and

43
00:03:30,640 --> 00:03:33,680
they were called depressed monsters. And I was like, these are, these are helping

44
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:37,120
me like get out of bed and like focus on my day and all that stuff. And then

45
00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:41,600
eventually after like, I think maybe like a couple months of me just not leaving

46
00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:45,680
the house, getting really dark, this little Yeti came out and it was, it was

47
00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:49,360
like furry and approachable. And I was like, okay, no, that's how I'm feeling

48
00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:52,560
like that's, it's not these universal monsters or this or that, like I'm

49
00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:55,520
feeling like this little fuzzball right here where I'm like, I don't know how to

50
00:03:55,520 --> 00:04:00,160
deal with these emotions. Like, I, you know, whatever it is. And so it was, it was

51
00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:03,200
a lifesaver literally, like I started leaving the house, I started going to

52
00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:07,120
coffee shops, I started just really focusing on waking up every morning and

53
00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:12,080
drawing this little monster. And eventually, you know, I put it online and

54
00:04:12,080 --> 00:04:16,160
people started really, you know, liking it and saying, oh, that is cool. Like that

55
00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:18,480
means something to me, I can see in the eyes that you're going through something

56
00:04:18,480 --> 00:04:22,000
like all that stuff. And I was like, okay, this is neat how someone can see my art

57
00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:25,600
and see how I'm feeling. So anyway, long story short, I put it on a batch of

58
00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:28,560
shirts, the first batch sold out and I was like, okay, like maybe there's

59
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:33,440
something here. And so all these years later through murals, toys, partnerships,

60
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:36,320
all these different things, we're now on Hot Topic where I donate to their Hot

61
00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:41,200
Topic Foundation. I've donated to mental health agencies for the past, you know,

62
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:45,680
damn near 10 years at this point. Trevor Project, Jed Foundation, I've worked with

63
00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:50,480
and I just really try to give back and be a conscious capitalist, you know, because

64
00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:54,400
unfortunately, most people want to hoard things and I'm like, no, if I can help

65
00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:58,160
people, then that's, that's where I think the real power is in all this stuff. And

66
00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:01,120
you know, I think people get it and people get it tattooed now, which is a huge

67
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:05,120
compliment. And I don't know, it's just been, it's been a wild journey. And I'm

68
00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:09,440
always happy to, you know, kind of recant it and look back and figure out how

69
00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:12,960
I've gotten here, which is I think always important because I'm always like, I'm

70
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:15,520
the kind of guy like looks forward all the time. So it is nice to kind of look

71
00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:21,360
back sometimes. It's cool because I think, you know, it's hard to being in the

72
00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:25,120
toy scene so much of it feels like it's without a purpose. Like for me, there's

73
00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:30,720
a purpose. But making my own characters and stuff sometimes it just like me

74
00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:35,680
messing around. But when I look at you and like see the progression from then

75
00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:41,760
until now, art with a purpose is what comes to mind. And we don't find that

76
00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:46,000
that often, because the purpose, your purpose is like outward so much of our

77
00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:49,680
art with a purpose is inward. But man, you are killing it with that.

78
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:53,760
Thank you so much. That really means a lot. It's, it's, it's tough because like I'm in,

79
00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:57,280
I'm in the, I'm in the weeds every day, right? And so like it's easy for me to like

80
00:05:57,280 --> 00:06:00,080
get down to myself like, Oh, I should have done this. I should have got up and

81
00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:03,360
painted this. I should have done that. Like, you know how it is as an artist. Like,

82
00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:06,480
you're always beating yourself up and like, Oh, I should have done this different

83
00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:10,240
and all that stuff. So it is nice to hear, you know, that the path is clear or

84
00:06:10,240 --> 00:06:14,080
whatever. But yeah, it's been, it's been interesting. I think from a toy

85
00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:22,560
perspective, I released my first toy in 2013 or 2014, I think it was. And so, you

86
00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:26,240
know, the designer toy scene was so different back then. It isn't like this

87
00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:29,840
hype beast culture that it is now where, you know, people are collecting things to

88
00:06:29,840 --> 00:06:34,640
resell. And like people really just love to buy toys. And I fell in love with that,

89
00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:38,880
with that love of, of collecting, right? And so, you know, I've always collected

90
00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:41,840
toys. I've always collected, you know, whether it's like Kenner Star Wars,

91
00:06:41,840 --> 00:06:47,920
Star Wars stuff or like, I was really big into like just 90 stuff for a long time.

92
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:54,800
And when, as soon as I went to my first designer con, which was 2011, I exhibited

93
00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:58,800
with a friend of mine, we were called the 80s kids, we did all 80s inspired stuff.

94
00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:03,760
And 2011 was the first designer con. And so we were just making stuff of like,

95
00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:07,360
putting pop culture stuff together, basically bootleg stuff, you know, which is

96
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:13,200
why I'm so ingrained in the bootleg scene. And it was super fun. And ever since that

97
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:17,040
first designer con that I went to, and I just started seeing what the scene was and

98
00:07:17,040 --> 00:07:21,840
just seeing what Mishka's doing or seeing what, you know, jerk face or whoever was doing it.

99
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:26,480
And, you know, meeting John from Spanky Stokes and like all these different people or whatever,

100
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:31,360
I started realizing just how nice everybody was and how cool everybody is. And I was like,

101
00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:36,480
I want to be a part of this. Like this is my, these are my kind of weirdos, right? And so,

102
00:07:36,480 --> 00:07:40,400
when I stopped doing the 80s kids thing and I started really focusing on my own character,

103
00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:44,080
it was really important to me to get it right. Because if I wanted to enter the scene as a

104
00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:47,920
visual artist, I wanted it to be respectful of the scene. And I also wanted to make something

105
00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:52,720
that I was super, super proud of. And so I waited, you know, a couple of years before I was, I was

106
00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:58,800
comfortable. And I actually worked with, there's a really famous artist from, I believe Singapore,

107
00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:03,760
maybe it's Philippines named Wetworks. And I'm a huge fan of Wetworks. I've always been a huge

108
00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:09,440
fan of Wetworks. And he sculpted my first toy. And so it was like this huge win from me where I

109
00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:14,960
was like, damn, like, I love this artist so much. And like the respect must be mutual because he

110
00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:18,960
doesn't really collab with people that much. And so it was really sick to just get that thing in

111
00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:23,040
the mail for the first time and go, okay, this shit is real now, like I'm holding it in like 3D.

112
00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:26,880
And I think that's the difference with toys besides like a mural or whatever, like you get to

113
00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:31,360
actually hold it and play with it in the physical space and put it places. And I just think that's

114
00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:40,080
so important with art. Yeah, you know, it's cool. The on the flip side, it's hard to convince people

115
00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:45,920
that aren't in the scene that those toys are art. Like that's right. That's the reverse, right? And

116
00:08:46,880 --> 00:08:51,760
I have toys in my office, they're like, it's crazy, they're like this, and then I have like a shelf

117
00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:58,320
being behind me that are just resin toys. And it's hard to explain. So I work with teenagers,

118
00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:03,360
and they'll come in and they're like, Hey, like, what do you just, what do you do? Do you play

119
00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:10,480
with these during the day? Or it's like, no, I don't. But what's cool is that earthworm gym

120
00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:15,760
figure that's in its packaging perfect on the wall. I met the guy that sculpted that. And so

121
00:09:15,760 --> 00:09:22,400
like, oh, that's cool. So it's like, that's the the tie for me is like, this is art, not for you,

122
00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:28,080
but for me, this is art also nostalgia. Oh, for I mean, the world victims of nostalgia,

123
00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:33,280
at this point, right? Like it's almost becoming like this weird, like, it's almost like a bad

124
00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:37,840
acid trip at this point, because it's like this loop of like nostalgia feeding into it's like

125
00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:42,480
that snake that's eating itself. Like there's no way to get away from him because now everything

126
00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:47,760
being made is based in nostalgia because it's like, I have this, I think I said this on another

127
00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:52,240
podcast, but like, I feel like nostalgia is the most dangerous drug that we have in society right

128
00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:57,360
now, because it's not allowing us to push forward artistically. It's not allowing us to create new

129
00:09:57,360 --> 00:10:02,320
ideas and have new IPs and all that stuff. Like, I can't tell you how many times that I exhibit.

130
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:07,920
And somebody comes up and says, what is this from? I go, it's just, it's just from my brain.

131
00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:12,960
Like, I, you know, it's just from my brain. And they go, Oh, but like, is it from is it a cartoon?

132
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:17,520
Or is it I go, no, it's like, I drew it, you know, like, and people just aren't used to it,

133
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:20,960
you know, and like, and that's fine. Like I'm not trying to change the scene or like whatever,

134
00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:25,200
I'm just trying to fit in the scene. But it is hard to have like your own character and try to

135
00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:28,480
market your own character without relying on any kind of pop culture or anything like that,

136
00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:33,840
because people just don't want to buy something they don't know from like another IP. And so

137
00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:38,720
it's crazy. Like, I'm doing LA Comic Con in December. And this is my first convention since,

138
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:44,560
like designer con like five years ago. And I think it's going to be the first time that that

139
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:49,040
Eurman's kind of playing in pop culture. And I'm excited about it. Like, I've been so scared of it

140
00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:55,520
for so long. And I've been because because my roots are in bootleg, like, I've been scared to bring

141
00:10:55,520 --> 00:11:00,160
my character back into the bootleg realm. And I've come up with a really cool idea, I think,

142
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:05,360
where he can kind of play in it that I'm stoked for. And it's going to be fun to kind of work in

143
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:09,280
nostalgia again, just from a personal like artistic standpoint, just to do it conventions

144
00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:15,760
and stuff like that. But I'm stoked on it. Yeah. You know, what you're talking about is so crazy.

145
00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:23,840
Like we it is the thing that kills, but also drive like when we when we go to designer con,

146
00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:28,320
a lot of the resin toy designers work with a guy named Dove and

147
00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:34,400
and I know Dove. Yeah, it do. Dove is so sick. I wish I could say how much I love that guy.

148
00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:41,440
But like down this alley, all these different artists and it's this resin alley area and they

149
00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:48,880
got like, oh, we've made this version of, I don't know, some Ewok that is whatever it's crystal,

150
00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:55,360
it has stuff in it. Or like we've made this toy with ties to playmates or it looks like this, it has

151
00:11:56,960 --> 00:12:02,320
and it's awesome because people will buy the things that they recognize and love and all those

152
00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:10,560
things. But you're right on introducing new IP. Because man, it is like, like it becomes crickets

153
00:12:10,560 --> 00:12:17,440
at some point, because people don't know what to do with new and they try to continually connect

154
00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:22,480
it to something they can relate with, which I think is a human problem. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

155
00:12:22,480 --> 00:12:25,760
And I think it's like a social media problem at this point, too. I think that the internet was

156
00:12:25,760 --> 00:12:30,320
the worst thing that ever happened to art. You know, as for all the perks that have happened

157
00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:35,840
for being able to put your work out there, it has made it so, you know, people, there's just,

158
00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,560
you know, I don't want to go down that rabbit hole, but people can be very negative about it,

159
00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:42,800
or people have their opinions on it is what it is. Luckily, I have a pretty positive

160
00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:48,160
atmosphere around my brand that for the most part, I haven't found a lot of negativity. In fact,

161
00:12:48,160 --> 00:12:53,520
most negativity that I find is from other artists. Like, I'm such a collaborative person. And like,

162
00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:58,720
for the most part, the strife in my career is from other artists trying to make my career harder.

163
00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:04,320
And it's like, why would you do that? If you know the struggle that comes with making something,

164
00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:09,280
why would you try to make it worse off for somebody else? Like, but that's a whole side

165
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:14,000
note side conversation. But the thing with Dove and like what you make and all these things,

166
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:20,720
like, I love it so much because it is it is so art focused. It's a it's a love language and it's a

167
00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:25,760
love letter to things that we all love. Like, it's so different than what other people are doing.

168
00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:30,000
And it's like, I don't know, like we have, I'm sometimes on this Twitch channel

169
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:35,440
called hot dad radio. And we have dove on it when he's doing his dove con or DK econ, it should be

170
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:40,720
called dove con, let's be real. And so he'll come on and show all the toys and stuff like that.

171
00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:45,680
And I just love how geeked out he gets like, and I mean, dove getting geeked out is pretty

172
00:13:45,680 --> 00:13:50,720
monotone. But you know, as geeked out as he gets, you can see the excitement, you know, and he lights

173
00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:54,640
up when he sees certain things. And just the way he talks about it is so different than other

174
00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:58,640
curators. Like, it's just, I don't know, I love don't have the pieces as well. I just think he's a

175
00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:03,920
very special person. Yeah, I think what's crazy. And I mean, we're going to dive back into you.

176
00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:12,560
But as a like a last thing that I think about is like, I don't know how to convey because so many

177
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:17,360
people are in this scene, right? Like it's increased even since I jumped in in 2020, it's like,

178
00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:24,320
tripled, quadrupled, whatever. There's not a way to convey to each one of them like, man,

179
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:30,000
you are bringing out my inner artist every day, every time I see your work, every time

180
00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:35,600
I see everything that is created, like you're bringing out parts of me that I didn't know existed.

181
00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:36,800
And so yeah,

182
00:14:38,720 --> 00:14:44,080
Oh, me personally, well, you and then the artists that make toys and it's like, yeah, thank you.

183
00:14:44,080 --> 00:14:47,600
That's that's a huge compliment. I mean, for I thought you were talking about dove there. So I

184
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:51,360
was just like shaking my head in agreement. But yeah, thank you to that's, yeah, it's a huge

185
00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:58,960
compliment. Thank you so much. That's how I feel about art artists to like, I am very much an artist,

186
00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:02,720
artists, you know what I mean? Like I love talking to other artists. I love collaborating

187
00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:08,720
with other artists. I like putting on for other artists like, I love seeing other artists win

188
00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:15,440
because this this industry is so fucking hard. Yeah. And it's getting harder by the day like

189
00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:22,560
the world of like, when I entered the scene, it was extra like it was exponentially easier

190
00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:27,120
in so many different ways. Like it's still had its hardships and all that stuff, but it was just

191
00:15:27,120 --> 00:15:31,680
easier because there wasn't as much competition, you know what I mean? And like, there was there

192
00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:36,720
was pockets and like, you could go to, you know, designer con and have conversations with Frank

193
00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:43,440
Kozik and like, there was no gatekeepers. It was beautiful. And then as the art world has kind of

194
00:15:43,440 --> 00:15:48,800
exploded in different ways, the designer toy scene, especially as it's, you know, like now it's like a

195
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:53,680
stock X thing where like everyone's just buying Takashi, Mirakami and cause because they can flip

196
00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:57,440
it for however fucking much money. And don't get me wrong, I'd love to be included in that

197
00:15:57,440 --> 00:16:04,400
conversation, but it's kind of ruining the the sanctity and the beautifulness of what the designer

198
00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:09,440
toy scene was and is and it's and that's artists making something because they fucking love to

199
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:14,400
make it. And it's being lost now because you see different artists that I don't I don't want to

200
00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:19,360
call I shouldn't call people's names, but you see our artists on Instagram sometimes and you're

201
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:24,560
like, motherfucker, you're just making that because you're trying to be you're trying to make money.

202
00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:29,600
And like, you know, like when an artist is just focused on capitalism and just focused on making

203
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:33,440
money, it just ruins the authenticity for me where I'm like, I'm never going to support that

204
00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:37,840
because you're not making it from like an authentic place of just wanting to make something cool. So

205
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:43,120
to sort of go back to your compliment, thank you because I'm so inspired by just like, I don't

206
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:46,960
know, people making things and doing things too. Like I just think it's such a beautiful thing.

207
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:51,760
And how lucky are we that we get to do that? Right? Yeah, you know, with the nostalgia piece

208
00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:57,840
to going back to that, the thing that I'm excited for is like finding things that aren't nostalgic

209
00:16:57,840 --> 00:17:04,880
yet, or people haven't found them nostalgic yet. And one of the things later this year, we're hosting

210
00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:12,240
toys on tap is hosting an art show at toy to shore about cool. And the theme is all on furbies.

211
00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:20,560
Like, haven't found out like, I don't know, it was just never something that people are like,

212
00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:26,240
Oh, I crave that now I miss those like no one has to furby. And so to have now an art show

213
00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:30,960
trying to create that nostalgia, that's what I'm here for. Bro, that's so cool. I've been thinking

214
00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:35,360
cool. I've been thinking a lot about furbies lately. So it's very apropos that you just said

215
00:17:35,360 --> 00:17:40,960
that I love uncut gems. So like that Furby necklace is always stuck in my head. But dude,

216
00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:45,440
I had that thought the other day of like, I wanted to turn because I drew a Furby. I wish

217
00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:49,680
you I don't know where it is a notebook somewhere. I drew like a Eurman Furby the other day. And

218
00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:54,480
I was like, that's fucking cool. But like, I can't do anything with it. That's dude, I can't wait to

219
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:58,640
see pictures from that art show, man. That's so sick. Yeah. Off air, we'll talk more about it

220
00:17:58,640 --> 00:18:04,960
because I want to hear more about this Furby. But so you talked about how you loved like toys and

221
00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:10,000
have always loved collecting. Let's go back to that point. Let's see, like, what does it look

222
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:15,600
like to start collecting early years for you and toys and yeah, and the influence they had on you

223
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:30,400
even growing up. We interrupt this broadcast of toys on time to bring you this.

224
00:18:45,920 --> 00:18:48,800
Check out www.dktoys.com for a full catalog.

225
00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:59,840
Okay, so I think that's like a multi tiered response. So basically, when I was a kid,

226
00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:02,880
I was a collector. Like I've just been a collector since I was a kid. I was,

227
00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:10,000
you know, my uncle collected Star Wars toys. He collected heavy metal memorabilia. And so I remember

228
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:14,240
being a kid and just being heavily inspired by that. Like I would buy, you know, like I grew up

229
00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:22,560
in the 90s. So it was peak toy making time, you know, like I collect a lot of Star Wars growing

230
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:28,720
up and a lot of like comic book stuff. I think we all did, right? And so I still have Star Wars

231
00:19:28,720 --> 00:19:33,840
toys from Power of the Force line that I just never opened. And I'm just now starting to trade

232
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:38,080
those into like Zia records here in town just because I need the space back and like, they just

233
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:42,480
don't, you know, I've enjoyed them enough. It's time to move on and someone else can enjoy them.

234
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:47,760
And so yeah, like as a kid, just heavy collector, comic books, all that stuff, toys, especially,

235
00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:51,520
we were just super inspirational to me. I would sit there and just draw, you know, toy designs

236
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:57,360
and all that stuff. And then as I got older, I graduated college with a degree in marketing.

237
00:19:57,360 --> 00:20:01,920
And so I started working corporate jobs and all that stuff. And in my first house that I got,

238
00:20:02,480 --> 00:20:08,240
I had a toy room that was strictly just covered head to toe and toys. And at that time,

239
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:12,880
and at that time, the 40 year old version had just come out. And that's what my dad called me,

240
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:17,680
right? And so, you know, like, it was just, it was cool. Like I love backs of the future. I

241
00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:21,280
collect a lot of backs of the future stuff. And so like, I had DeLorean stuff everywhere.

242
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:26,320
A lot of like Marvel legend stuff. So I had like the big like Sentinel, like, you know,

243
00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:32,160
with the scene of him fighting the X men and what else do I have in there? I love hot toys

244
00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:38,640
from sideshow. I think those are some of the most beautiful toys on the market right now. Right.

245
00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:43,280
And then but now currently, like I've kind of like taken a step back from collecting because

246
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:48,400
I have too much shit. And so yeah, I'm kind of going in like a cleanse mode right now,

247
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:54,560
where I'm trying to just like, just move stuff to better homes that can enjoy it a little bit more

248
00:20:54,560 --> 00:21:00,080
than I can give the respect to those toys for because there's energy and toys, I feel like.

249
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:04,800
And like if someone can can, you know, have that in their home and enjoy it more than I can kind

250
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:08,720
of give it right now, then I think that's important. So I mean, I was at San Diego Comic Con a couple

251
00:21:08,720 --> 00:21:14,080
weeks ago, like I said, and like, I didn't really buy anything. And I was like shocked by that.

252
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:18,080
Because usually I'm just like, I got bags on bags and bags. Like I think the only things that I got

253
00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:24,320
were I got stuff like affiliated with the art scene. So I've been wanting an Alex party original

254
00:21:24,320 --> 00:21:29,680
for a while. So I splurged on on one from Alex, which was cool. Had a little, you know,

255
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:35,600
it's always cool talking to Alex. I bought a punk drunkers Funko Pop just because it was like an

256
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:42,080
easy $20 to spend. I think I have the stuff behind me. But yeah, it's like, I just buy I just try

257
00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:46,240
to buy stuff that like supports the art scene at this point. Like I think that's what's important

258
00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:53,040
to me about collecting now is like, I'd rather give my money to an artist making things than Hasbro

259
00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:57,920
or Mattel, because they don't need fucking money, you know, like I'd rather I want to stop feeding

260
00:21:57,920 --> 00:22:03,920
the machine and start feeding the other machine of like artists surviving, you know, because I

261
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:07,280
think that's important. So that's kind of where my collecting is kind of geared toward now.

262
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:17,120
Yeah. And it takes a lot like, I think the toys for me hit a certain point where they're old enough.

263
00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:21,680
So it's like, I'm not even giving to this machine anymore. Like I'm giving to other people that

264
00:22:21,680 --> 00:22:27,520
have collected my life has talked about like, what does it look like to cleanse some of this stuff?

265
00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:33,680
And my collection is not even a whole room like it's maybe a wall. And to already have the

266
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:38,320
conversation of like, what's it look like to cleanse some of this? Well, I don't know.

267
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:50,080
You tell me, babe. Yeah, you cleanse something. Yeah. And so it's it's cool. I did I did fall victim to

268
00:22:50,080 --> 00:23:03,280
the man, the retro Marvel Legends 375. I did. I was like, okay, I will start getting these new ones.

269
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:11,120
And like, but I didn't start collecting that until it was like, I don't know, earlier this year,

270
00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:16,720
when they had already been discontinued. So like now I'm having to go backwards and collect.

271
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:23,440
Yep. No, I feel you. Luckily, I feel like it's an addiction gene with me. So like once I buy one,

272
00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:28,160
I'm like, I got to get them all now, you know, like I just start getting dirty with it. So I try to

273
00:23:28,160 --> 00:23:32,560
avoid the toy aisle at Walmart when I go or Target or whatever, just because I know like,

274
00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:36,960
I'm just one purchase away from getting the entire DC Universe line again, or like,

275
00:23:36,960 --> 00:23:44,320
any of that stuff. I just can't do it. So yeah, it's it's it's hard, especially because some of

276
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:50,880
the new toys are like going back down to prices when we were kids. Like, yeah, Ninja Turtle line is

277
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:56,800
997 right now. A piece which is smart, which is smart. They're like, you know, like, you're gonna

278
00:23:56,800 --> 00:24:03,600
lock me in. Yeah, fine, dude, I can't I know, dude, I love Ninja Turtles so much. It's going to be

279
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:08,000
hard for me not to buy this new line too. I feel like what I've been doing lately is I've been

280
00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:13,680
trying to get like staple pieces. Yeah. And so there's like certain things that I have alerts for

281
00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:19,200
on like Mercari or eBay, like the one that I'm really searching for right now is an old wrestling

282
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:25,200
figure that came out in like 2011, I think it's Andy Kaufman. I got a huge Andy Kaufman fan.

283
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:30,320
And so he had, there was a toy that came out with him versus Jerry the King Lawler. And

284
00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:36,000
it's got Andy with like a neck brace and all that stuff. And I want it so bad, but like it's,

285
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:40,080
you know, it's like 120 bucks because they only made a small run of it. But yeah, that's the one

286
00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:45,920
that I'm kind of on the search for right now. And then yeah, my collecting is just like different

287
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:51,840
now. Like I used to just, I don't know, I feel like I just, I don't know, it's weird. Like I

288
00:24:51,840 --> 00:24:56,080
collected everything that I really wanted from artists that I really, really like. I started

289
00:24:56,080 --> 00:25:00,400
doing the NFT thing for a while, like NFT, people, you know, artists that were getting into the

290
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:07,040
NFT space that were offering, you know, exclusives through their NFT stuff. So like Michael Reeder,

291
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:13,680
reader one, he's an artist that I really, really look up to. He did a Web 3 project earlier last year.

292
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:19,760
And if you collected 10 of them, then he would send you a one of one print signed that static

293
00:25:19,760 --> 00:25:24,160
medium printed, which is, I'm just like, dude, his prints are like four grand. So if I could like

294
00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:29,760
jump in at that price and get a like a one of one, like that just was cool to me. And I think that

295
00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:35,040
like the designer toy world hasn't super jumped into the Web 3 space yet. And that's kind of what

296
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:39,040
I'm trying to figure out right now. I have a generative project that I've been working on for

297
00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:42,480
like two or three years and the art's all done. Now it's just like trying to put a team together

298
00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:47,520
to like do it right. Because I just don't have the time. Like I'm one person running a lifestyle

299
00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:52,960
brand and like, I'm so ADHD that like, as you can probably tell from this conversation, I was like

300
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:58,000
jumping everywhere. But like, I want to do a little bit of everything, you know, and so like

301
00:25:58,000 --> 00:26:01,600
one day I wake up and I'm like, I don't want to work on this Web 3 thing, I want to work on a

302
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:05,920
painting or I want to work on this or I have to ship orders or I have to organize the studio or

303
00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:10,480
I have to do a live stream or I have to do this or that. Like I just, it's gotten to a point now

304
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:15,440
where I just have to delegate a little bit better. And I'm fortunate enough to work with one of my

305
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:20,560
really close friends, Derek, who's come on as like a project manager and he, I just love him to

306
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:25,120
pieces and I trust them. And that's so rare to find in this world, you know, to find someone that

307
00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:30,400
you love and respect and trust and you know, has your back and it's, you know, he's, he's starting

308
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:34,800
to get me a little bit more organized, which is nice because it's a lot like right now, like,

309
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:39,600
you know, it's a lot going on and I'm very fortunate and I'm lucky and I, and it's been a lot of

310
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:43,920
fucking work. Don't get me wrong, but like, it's also lucky to do that in this world, in this,

311
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:47,680
in this art world right now. So it's cool to have him come on board and just like keep me clean.

312
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:51,840
I'm like, what are we doing with Hot Topic? I'm like, I don't fucking know. You tell me, like,

313
00:26:51,840 --> 00:26:57,920
I, you know, I don't know, I just draw stuff. I just work here. Like that's my new mantra. Like

314
00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:02,560
I just work here. Yeah. Just let me draw cool stuff and like, please just help me on the rest.

315
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:06,880
So it's been cool. Like, bless up. Shout out to Derek. What a, what a good man.

316
00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:14,880
You're trying to quiet quit from your own company. Yo, dude, the way you just said that's hilarious.

317
00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:23,680
Um, yeah, I've done that. I think that's why like, my mantra this year is I'm just happy to be here.

318
00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:28,640
Like, honestly, I'm just happy to be here. I've survived a lot of stuff in my past. Like last

319
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:32,000
year, it got really dark again. I didn't think I was going to be here. I kind of disappeared

320
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:36,400
for a while last year. A lot of stuff's happened this past couple of years with everybody, but like,

321
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:42,000
I, I'm just happy to be here and alive and make this stuff and just do these things. And I'm just,

322
00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:46,240
I just am thankful. And I think living out of gratefulness has been like the biggest change

323
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:51,760
this year because I have tried to quiet quit a lot. Like so many times. And I think as artists,

324
00:27:51,760 --> 00:27:57,600
we all do that, you know, like, I don't know if this is like this for you, but my brain doesn't

325
00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:03,600
shut off. Like my brain is constantly going and to be laying there in bed every night and just

326
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:09,360
like, you know, you're like, dude, just shut up, please, just please, just let me just go to sleep.

327
00:28:09,360 --> 00:28:13,840
And there's been so many times where I'm like, if I just quit doing this and just did something

328
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:19,920
else, I wouldn't have to do this anymore. I could just go, you know, frivolously live and just,

329
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:24,400
you know, like, I think there's such a weight on artists and there's such a weight on creatives

330
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:29,840
in general to constantly produce and it's self imposed and a lot of it's society imposed and

331
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:34,080
all that stuff. Like I think a lot of it's the algorithms, you know, if I don't post every day

332
00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:38,240
that I'm forgotten or I'm disappearing or all that stuff. And I think the most powerful thing

333
00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:41,840
that I did this year is just, I basically just said, fuck you to social media where I was like,

334
00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:45,840
I'm going to post when I want to post, I don't care anymore. The people that like me and want to

335
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:50,560
follow me and want to like support me are going to find me and they're going to search it out.

336
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:55,120
And it's been so good for my own mental health because I'm like, I don't give a shit anymore.

337
00:28:56,000 --> 00:29:00,080
I'm quiet quitting in like other ways at this point. Like I don't want to quiet quit on my brand

338
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:04,160
or like my creations. Like I want to quiet quit on the sucky part of all this stuff. And that's

339
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:10,880
social media for me. Yeah. As you, I mean, let's I want to get down to this nitty gritty of your

340
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:20,400
history. We have the tragedy of the loss of a loved one and it sparks what's so tough as it

341
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:26,000
like in the midst of tragedy, it sparks a career. It sparks everything that you've done and it kind

342
00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:33,520
of breathes life into that. Walking through that dark period, it's kind of feels sometimes like

343
00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:39,200
you have blinders on and not knowing what you're going to do next. And when you happened upon

344
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:46,480
this creative little yeti character, how did it like, how did you know that this was gold for you?

345
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:52,800
Like this was what was going to get you going? I think because I never thought about it as a

346
00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:58,160
capitalistic pursuit. Yeah. And I hate to keep bringing it up like that, but I never did. Like

347
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:05,040
it is, I still don't like to me, the character has this wild energy to it that I still haven't

348
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:10,960
tapped into fully. And it like there's this really famous Michael Jackson quote that I really like.

349
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:16,480
And you know, I know Michael Jackson is divisive as a pop culture icon, but I still really love

350
00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:24,240
Michael Jackson. And he has this quote where they're asking how he wrote Billy Jean, I think it was,

351
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:27,600
or maybe it's smooth criminal, I can't remember. And he starts sitting there and he goes, well,

352
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:32,240
I came up with a baseline. He does like, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom,

353
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:36,720
doom, doom, doom, doom. And then all of a sudden he goes, and from there, I don't remember. And

354
00:30:36,720 --> 00:30:42,800
I'm like, what the fuck? And he and he starts talking about how there was a higher self that he

355
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:49,520
attunes to that flows through him, that that's how he creates. And I really truly believe that

356
00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:55,120
like I truly believe that we all have this higher artistic creative self. I think that humans in

357
00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:59,680
nature are creative. And because I mean, just look at the world around you, it's all I mean,

358
00:30:59,680 --> 00:31:07,200
there's art and everything. And so for me, the character was always a vessel to carry me forward.

359
00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:14,320
And I truly believe that it was a gift from my grandfather in a lot of ways. He was 33rd degree

360
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:20,800
Mason. He was a Zell's a Shriner. He dressed up like a clown and visited sick kids in the hospital.

361
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:27,600
He always gave back, he always gave too much of himself. And because he just wanted people to

362
00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:32,320
be happy around him. He was very much like a Robin Williams type character of like, I will die before

363
00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:36,640
anybody's unhappy around me. And it was beautiful. Like he was a beautiful, beautiful person. And so

364
00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:41,760
I truly believe that there is an aspect of this character coming to fruition as a way not only

365
00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:47,120
to save myself, but also to keep my grandpa's memory alive in different ways, and also to help

366
00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:52,640
other people. And now that I'm seeing it tattooed on people and like seeing it in retailers that I

367
00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:59,120
grew up with and just these crazy things, I'm like, Yeah, like that's what it is. It's not about me.

368
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:03,360
Like this character has never been about me. And so that's why I wouldn't like when I do these.

369
00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:09,040
So I just got back from a three month tour that I booked earlier this year. And you know, I drove

370
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:15,440
2000 miles in five days, like last month, it just it's been a lot, right? And so the whole the reason

371
00:32:15,440 --> 00:32:22,240
I did it is because I mean, like, I didn't want to, I didn't want to like, you know, get up every day

372
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:27,520
at 5am and drive and get to these markets, set up set up a booth, set up all this stuff, have

373
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:32,240
conversations with people for six hours, tear it down and just be completely exhausted by the end

374
00:32:32,240 --> 00:32:37,600
of the night. But the reason I did it is because I wanted to get back in touch with people again.

375
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:42,320
I mean, it's been such an isolating couple of years. I experienced a lot of those emotions that

376
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:47,440
I felt when my grandfather passed that I was starting to get I was starting to distance myself

377
00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:52,880
from like why it is that I do this and that's to connect with people. And so I ended up canceling

378
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:56,240
the rest of it because I just couldn't do it anymore, like the burnout is it was starting to

379
00:32:56,240 --> 00:33:01,680
affect me a lot. But it made me realize like the power of this character is still very much there.

380
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:05,840
Like whenever I sell a plush to somebody in person, it's so different selling it on a website or

381
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:10,240
selling it on a live stream or selling it on, you know, through hot topic or whatever it is.

382
00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:15,280
Whenever I sell a plush, this is a long answer to your question. And I swear I'm going to wrap it

383
00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:21,760
up here. I always say, like this is my year and it's the year on the table, like this is mine,

384
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:26,880
this is my self portrait. But when you take yours home, you name it, you brush the hair out of its

385
00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:33,040
face, you get close with it, and it's yours now. And your man is just the species name of the character.

386
00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:37,680
Now you get to name it and you get to make it yours. And it's it's been cool to see everyone's

387
00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:41,360
like names they come up with the different places they take it. I mean, people send me pictures

388
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:46,080
of them taking it to festivals, like I've seen it like rolling loud or whatever that one's called

389
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:50,640
and life is beautiful Coachella and it's just cool to see the adventures that people take theirs on

390
00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:56,400
now. And so I'm trying to create more products that have that kind of like adventure built into

391
00:33:56,400 --> 00:34:00,480
it, you know, like a choose your own adventure type thing, but like more ingrained with the story.

392
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:04,720
And so the plush has been like the first aspect of that. And I'm trying to figure out what the next

393
00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:10,480
is for that avenue. And it's been cool, like, because you're right, like it does come from a

394
00:34:10,480 --> 00:34:16,640
really dark place, but I try to bring as much light to it and as much like positivity to the brand

395
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:21,760
as possible, because it I can easily get dark, like, you know, I think all of us can we all have

396
00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:26,560
that inside of us. And I'd rather just operate in positivity instead of negativity, because

397
00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:30,160
that's the only reason I'm still here on the earth. And, you know, I think a lot of us are is that we

398
00:34:30,160 --> 00:34:35,680
choose to be positive. It's a choice, you know, instead of dealing in that negative energy all

399
00:34:35,680 --> 00:34:39,040
the time. So I don't know if that answered it, I kind of just rambled there for a while. But

400
00:34:39,040 --> 00:34:45,280
I hope you guys know it's good. Yeah. And even if I didn't, my editing skills are off the charts

401
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:49,920
now. So we're that's what's up. That's what's up. What's cool is the way that you described

402
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:55,440
your man earlier was this like, he has so many big emotions in there. Yeah, there's this thing

403
00:34:55,440 --> 00:35:02,240
with dogs and my dog does this. If they have too many big emotions, they'll go grab a stuffed animal

404
00:35:02,240 --> 00:35:06,560
or something and bring it to you. It's not for you. It's just they got too many big feelings.

405
00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:12,640
And so then they like shake and yeah, so like, you're man already connects to like my dog who's

406
00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:18,960
like getting older and never dying, but he's getting older. Yeah, I like that. That's great.

407
00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:27,920
But so you like what's interesting too is you took the brand without wanting it. It's almost

408
00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:33,840
like didn't want to create a brand, but created the brand. And it had a purpose to it made the

409
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:40,560
shirts those started going and then jump from shirt to toy. What's that progression because

410
00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:45,760
that's a cool progression. Usually we're like toy and then we'll create merch. So you went the other

411
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:53,200
way. What's that like? Why was that? I think it's easy for me to like have an answer now because

412
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:59,840
I'm looking back. But I think at the time when I was thinking I've always been really inspired by

413
00:35:59,840 --> 00:36:07,520
Cartoon Network and Adult Swim. Adventure Time, regular show, even back before that Space Ghost

414
00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:14,080
Coast to Coast, like all that stuff, right? And I wanted to build a world for my character,

415
00:36:14,080 --> 00:36:19,120
but I wanted to do it in a nonconventional way because basically my whole goal is like,

416
00:36:19,120 --> 00:36:24,240
I want to build my merch line out so that way when it becomes a cartoon, I have all the rights to

417
00:36:24,240 --> 00:36:30,720
it already. So that's always been my goal because I have friends that are artists and they have

418
00:36:30,720 --> 00:36:36,720
managers and stuff that take 50% of everything that they do. And it's such a grotesque thing in

419
00:36:36,720 --> 00:36:42,240
the art world, people that just like try to own artists and all that stuff. And so I'm completely

420
00:36:42,240 --> 00:36:47,680
DIY and like everything that I do in my brand is because I want to do it and it's all self-funded

421
00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:53,680
and it's all every money that every dollar that's made with depressed monsters is either donated

422
00:36:53,680 --> 00:37:00,800
or put back into the brand to make stuff. Like it's not a profitable brand. Like it's enough to

423
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:05,520
sustain itself and it's enough to pay the bills and it's enough to just make cool shit because

424
00:37:05,520 --> 00:37:11,840
that's all I care about. And so the progression from clothing to toys was with that, excuse me,

425
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:18,240
was with that in mind, was cool. I just got a partnership with Zappos. We're now on Zappos.

426
00:37:18,240 --> 00:37:22,480
So now how can I turn this money into something that I want to make? Okay, cool. I'm going to pay

427
00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:28,480
Wetworks, you know, thousands of dollars to sculpt this and then I'm going to pay him even more

428
00:37:28,480 --> 00:37:32,800
thousands of dollars to produce these and then I'm going to sell them. I remember the designer

429
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:40,000
con that I presented those at, I sold one. Oh, like that's how crazy the toy world is. Like even

430
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:46,080
back then I put all this money into it and I sold one of them and I was like, okay, this is eye

431
00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:51,920
opening. And like, it was one of those things that I just believed in it so much that I was like,

432
00:37:51,920 --> 00:37:58,000
okay, I sold one. I know I can sell more. I think I had a run of 30. And I was like, fuck, like,

433
00:37:58,000 --> 00:38:02,800
this is so much money. What am I going to do? Blah, blah, blah. The other thing too was that

434
00:38:02,800 --> 00:38:08,480
when he shipped them to me, half of, I think like 25 of them were broken when I opened the box at

435
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:12,960
Designer Con. So I was like, you have to be kidding me. Like this is just one hit after another.

436
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:18,000
And so I remember that designer con, I was just like, so in the red. And so I was like, shit,

437
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:22,480
what do I do now? I think the beautiful thing about sticking to your guns and sticking to

438
00:38:22,480 --> 00:38:28,480
and just not quitting is that eventually, eventually they sold out like, don't get me wrong,

439
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:32,000
like that was a really cool milestone. But I think the coolest part is that

440
00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:41,440
there's a 7pm YouTube live. It's Toys R Live. Toys R Live. Toys R Live. Toys R Live.

441
00:38:41,440 --> 00:38:46,880
This way cool artist unboxing accounts under 1000 followers, aren't out there for 30 bucks or less.

442
00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:53,760
Collectors spotlight. Current upcoming shows and drops. Giveaways. Short chats with artists.

443
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:03,920
100% indie all the time. That's Toys R Live. Toys R Live.

444
00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:09,440
Thursday nights, 7pm PST, YouTube live. Like people. So when the pandemic hit,

445
00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:13,280
I started doing live stream selling and I started selling on different apps like,

446
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:17,120
you know, like these whatnot apps and all that stuff. I started selling on one called Pop Shop

447
00:39:17,120 --> 00:39:21,440
because designer con was on Pop Shop. And I got lucky because I did a late night show.

448
00:39:21,440 --> 00:39:26,800
And no one else was doing a late night show. And I had a couple of those left over. And I

449
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:31,200
sold those things for maybe 120. During the late night show, people were buying them for hundreds

450
00:39:31,200 --> 00:39:35,440
and thousands of dollars just because like, everyone was like stuck inside and they and

451
00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:38,320
they were finding out about the story of the brand. Some people had known the brand,

452
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:41,680
they didn't have a chance to buy it before. And so it started becoming bidding wars.

453
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:45,840
And it was like, it was really surreal for me because I was like, Holy shit, like this toy

454
00:39:45,840 --> 00:39:50,880
that didn't sell out or that I sold one of when I released it, because I just held on to a couple

455
00:39:50,880 --> 00:39:56,800
of them of the run have become like this, this different thing now because one, it's, it's for

456
00:39:56,800 --> 00:40:00,320
two reasons. Like what works has become highly collected. You know, he's just, he's one of the

457
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:04,720
most respected toy makers in the game, in my opinion, him and, and Quicks are like, I and I

458
00:40:04,720 --> 00:40:10,640
to me. And, and then two people collect my stuff differently now. And so like, I just feel really

459
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:14,320
lucky that like I held to my guns and stuck to my guns on that one because it was really

460
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:19,360
demeaning to be sitting at designer con as an artist that had fans. Like, I, you know, I wasn't

461
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:25,200
like a small artist, like by any means into 2014, but I wasn't, I hadn't grown to make things like

462
00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:29,680
I make now. But also just to be sitting there and seeing other people selling is always really

463
00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:33,200
demeaning because you're like, well, what's wrong with me? What's wrong with what I make?

464
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:36,640
Like, why is it that people don't want what I'm doing or what I'm making? And so,

465
00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:42,800
you know, I think everything that I do is out of that emotion of like, okay, well, I have to prove

466
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:49,120
why my, my thing is worth something or why my thing is cool or why whatever, because you have to,

467
00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:55,120
you have to show people that essentially. So yeah, I think that the leap from clothing to toys was one,

468
00:40:55,760 --> 00:40:59,760
I love toys. I've always loved toys. I wanted to be in the scene, but also two,

469
00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:06,000
I just, I guess it was just because I thought it was cool. That's that's to answer your question.

470
00:41:06,000 --> 00:41:10,480
I thought it would be cool to jump in that scene. And other people I love do it. And I don't know,

471
00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:14,320
I just thought it'd be rad. I still haven't made a vinyl toy. Like that's, that's my big goal.

472
00:41:14,320 --> 00:41:18,160
And I'm hoping to do it in the next couple of years, but that's, you know, I just stick with

473
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:24,720
resident right now. Yeah. One of the, you know, I always think about that when I go to designer con

474
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:33,040
of what people like, I never want to see someone at a booth, not interacting with anyone,

475
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:37,280
especially like, if I don't know you, and I've never interacted with you as an artist,

476
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:42,640
I may pass by your table a couple of times and like figure out like, how do we going to interact

477
00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:48,320
here? But those people that I've interacted with because of this or because of what I do or any

478
00:41:48,320 --> 00:41:53,360
number of things, I will spend hours at your booth. If we're talking the whole time, like,

479
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:59,600
great. And we're going to talk about how rad your stuff is because it's just about how much I love

480
00:41:59,600 --> 00:42:06,320
you and your art. I always do fear those moments of like walking by one and they're just sitting

481
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:13,280
there like waiting for someone to engage like, let me be that person. It's well, yeah, I feel you,

482
00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:19,760
dude. And from someone that just got back from three months of doing it, it's hard, right? Like,

483
00:42:19,760 --> 00:42:24,960
I'm an, I'm one of those weird people that like, I can be extroverted, but I need to recharge my

484
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:29,040
batteries. And if my batteries aren't charged, I am the most introverted person on the planet.

485
00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:32,720
Like, I just cannot, I can't talk, I can't physically talk. And I have just really bad social

486
00:42:32,720 --> 00:42:39,920
anxiety. And so I think a lot of it for that first year that I did that with my own character

487
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:45,600
was I didn't have a friend to rely on to be the salesperson. I was the artist and the salesperson.

488
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:50,640
And so it's hard because like, you're sitting there and you're being completely vulnerable by

489
00:42:50,640 --> 00:42:55,920
putting something out that you made and that your heart and soul is in, and then you have to sell it.

490
00:42:55,920 --> 00:43:01,360
So you're almost like selling a part of your soul in this really weird, like, fucked up way,

491
00:43:01,360 --> 00:43:04,960
right? And so you just can't overthink it at the end of the day. That's what I've learned is you

492
00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:09,600
just can't overthink it. You just have to like put your retail cap on, Hey, how's it going? I love

493
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:13,920
your shirt. Oh my God, you know, like, and you just have to do it. And it sucks. And it's the worst

494
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:18,400
part of the job, but it's also part of the job. I'd rather be doing that than sitting at a desk,

495
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:24,400
talking about Excel sheets, you know, like, I've done that, like, I've had every job in the book.

496
00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:30,240
I've worked construction, I've washed dishes in a hospital. I've, you know, I've done it all.

497
00:43:30,240 --> 00:43:35,600
And I think that like, right now, I had to disappear last year to come back to terms of the

498
00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:40,080
fact that like, I'm choosing to do this and I love to do this. So fucking do it, man. Like,

499
00:43:40,080 --> 00:43:47,280
you know, like, and it's tough sometimes for sure, because like, I don't know. Like you see,

500
00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:53,120
you do see the different types of ways people run their booths, right? Like, so I just got back from

501
00:43:53,120 --> 00:43:58,160
I was at Five Points Festival in Brooklyn. And that was the first time I've done an East Coast show.

502
00:43:58,160 --> 00:44:03,120
And there was expensive, like you have hotel costs, you have flight costs, you have ubers,

503
00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:08,400
you have food costs, you have all these things that just start piling up. And so when I got there,

504
00:44:08,400 --> 00:44:14,240
I was like, I have to sell, you know, like I have to, I got to pay for this trip. And so I was by

505
00:44:14,240 --> 00:44:19,040
some really respected artists, some really famous artists, like, you know, there's all you have,

506
00:44:19,040 --> 00:44:26,000
you run the gamut of people that are around you. And I just put my cap on and like, I was really,

507
00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:30,800
it was kind of surreal because on the on the flip side, like on the one side, I had people that

508
00:44:30,800 --> 00:44:37,040
were coming to an East Coast show, dressed head to gear or head to toe and depressed monster stuff,

509
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:41,440
just to come see me. And like, in New York, you got to travel to do that. So I'm so grateful for

510
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:46,000
that. So I'll give you goodies, I'll hook it up. I'll, you know, hey, if you get this, I'll throw

511
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:50,160
in this like, oh, that's because I want to pay it forward and just say thank you. And I remember

512
00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:54,080
by the end of it, I was by this really famous artist. And he goes, he's like, dude, I didn't

513
00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:58,320
sell a single thing today. And I go, I'm so sorry. And he goes, he's like, dude, I got to give you

514
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:02,560
respect, man, because you hustled. And I was like, well, I looked at like I did, I had to like, I

515
00:45:02,560 --> 00:45:07,120
didn't, I didn't get to just write a subway here and like, just set up like I had, like, there was

516
00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:10,800
months of preparation for this and like all that stuff. So if I didn't come here and do that,

517
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:15,600
I'd be really mad at myself. And so I think like that was an eye opening thing for me to just like

518
00:45:15,600 --> 00:45:21,920
to be, you know, to be given that respect of like you hustled at a show where like, you know,

519
00:45:21,920 --> 00:45:26,400
there's just so much competition. I was like, okay, cool, like, I think I'm getting more comfortable

520
00:45:26,400 --> 00:45:31,360
with this and something that I was very uncomfortable with before. And it's been hard and it's been

521
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:36,640
taxing and it's been really, really, it's been really fucking hard to get to that honestly,

522
00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:40,880
like, it's not an easy thing to do, like by any means. And I have so much respect for

523
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:46,080
for any kind of artisan that gets out there and sets up a booth and and sells their wares,

524
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:50,800
whether you're making candles or you're making paintings, like it's it's hard to do and there's

525
00:45:50,800 --> 00:45:56,480
so much competition. And so I don't know that five points was just was was a surreal trip just

526
00:45:56,480 --> 00:46:00,720
because like, you know, Pete, like I said, people were dressed headed to my stuff. And I had other

527
00:46:00,720 --> 00:46:04,800
artists that were there, other companies that basically were telling me like they only started

528
00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:08,880
their company because they saw my live streams during the pandemic and it allowed them to be

529
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:14,000
goofy. And I was like, Yeah, that's half the fun of what we do, you know, so like, it's just cool

530
00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:21,360
to see how my little character that for me is just, you know, I look at this thing and I'm just

531
00:46:21,360 --> 00:46:25,760
like, that's just me, you know, like, it's just that's all it is. And for other people, it just

532
00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:30,320
has grown to be something else entirely. And it's it's something that like, I don't take lightly,

533
00:46:30,320 --> 00:46:35,440
and I try to put the necessary respect on and try to pay it forward where I can. So yeah, it's been

534
00:46:35,440 --> 00:46:39,920
a it's been a wild year, like for sure. This has been one of the wilder years for for the brand of

535
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:45,440
just like growing and developing and being more comfortable in my own skin. Yeah, so I mean,

536
00:46:46,240 --> 00:46:53,520
in how the brand has developed, you started, you did toys, you moved up and then different brand

537
00:46:53,520 --> 00:47:00,000
deals and now working with Hot Topic like what's that? This like birth and blooming of depressed

538
00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:06,000
monsters in the corporate sector now? What's that like? Yeah, I don't think that I'm giving it the

539
00:47:06,000 --> 00:47:10,800
necessary attention that it should honestly, because I am like, I'm such an anarchist at heart,

540
00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:15,440
like I grew up listening to like Chumba Wamba, which are like the dopest anarchists in the world,

541
00:47:15,440 --> 00:47:19,600
or like, I love the sex pistols and the clash growing up, like I come from such a punk rock

542
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:24,560
culture that like, I don't give the necessary attention to the stuff that it needs to and

543
00:47:24,560 --> 00:47:28,080
that's why I'm so happy to bring on a project manager because I'm like, okay, cool, now like,

544
00:47:28,080 --> 00:47:33,360
I can be my fucking weirdo punk rock self and like have the help necessary where it is, right?

545
00:47:33,360 --> 00:47:38,240
Like it is, it's surreal, like it is weird to see something birthed out of, you know,

546
00:47:38,240 --> 00:47:44,240
surviving suicide to be on Hot Topic now in weird ways and like, it's cool. I mean,

547
00:47:44,240 --> 00:47:51,120
everything had a path, right? So I told you I came from corporate. So I worked at Zappos for 10,

548
00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:58,240
seven years. And I was the only employee that was on the site as a vendor. So like, I was an employee

549
00:47:58,240 --> 00:48:03,280
at a company and also a vendor of the company. And so I had this weird double hat thing where

550
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:07,440
they're like, Hey, dude, you can't work on this shit during work hours. But if you want to like

551
00:48:07,440 --> 00:48:14,320
moonlight it more power to you. So I was basically for five years there, working nine to five,

552
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:20,480
coming home working six to two in the morning, just building this brand. And so the first corporate

553
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:26,160
deal that I got was Zappos. And it was such a wild way that it came about. And then that led to Zapp,

554
00:48:26,160 --> 00:48:31,760
or it's a Hot Topic, and then that led to, you know, XYZ or whatever. And now we're trying to,

555
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:37,760
right now this year, we're trying to formulate it in a different way to like build out the wholesale

556
00:48:37,760 --> 00:48:41,760
side of it and really build out our wholesale business and build out like more licensing

557
00:48:41,760 --> 00:48:46,720
opportunities. And for me personally, I've been just studying the game a lot and trying to get

558
00:48:46,720 --> 00:48:51,200
better at design. Because I didn't go to art school. Like everything that I do is just like

559
00:48:51,760 --> 00:48:55,680
out of necessity and trying to figure out like what this is. I mean, the only reason I know

560
00:48:55,680 --> 00:49:01,840
Photoshop is because I bootlegged it. You know, I torrented CS6 like the rest of us. And I was

561
00:49:01,840 --> 00:49:06,560
face swapping my friends, you know what I mean? Like just being a dummy with Photoshop, just like

562
00:49:06,560 --> 00:49:11,920
all of us. And so now that I have like friends that work at Adobe, it's funny to tell them that

563
00:49:11,920 --> 00:49:15,600
story because they're like, Yeah, that's why we all work here. You know, like everybody has it at

564
00:49:15,600 --> 00:49:20,480
same pathway with Adobe and Photoshop in general. And so I'm trying to really take it seriously now

565
00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:26,480
and just figure out like what is my style with graphic design because I never got that opportunity

566
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:32,800
to learn it. And so I've taken a step back where I'm not doing murals as much anymore. I'm not doing

567
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:37,920
you know, much of anything else rather than just designing things in Photoshop and trying to get

568
00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:41,360
really good at that. So that way I can kind of carry the brand forward in that way.

569
00:49:41,360 --> 00:49:46,560
Yeah, it's funny that you said the CS6 thing because I for sure torrented the hell out of that.

570
00:49:48,800 --> 00:49:53,040
But then the fear was like I couldn't let it ever try to connect to anything because it wants it

571
00:49:53,040 --> 00:50:00,800
updated over. It happened at one time. I had to find another torrent. Yeah, I remember updating it

572
00:50:00,800 --> 00:50:06,640
and it was like, guess what? This program no longer works. I was like, fine, it's fine.

573
00:50:06,640 --> 00:50:12,160
I know. I mean, and now it's like it's at the point now where it's like, okay, I'll just pay for it.

574
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:20,000
Like if I'm building like I built my brand on a 2010 MacBook that didn't that barely worked and

575
00:50:20,000 --> 00:50:26,800
torrented, you know, versions of Photoshop. And then I didn't buy my first real MacBook until 2019,

576
00:50:26,800 --> 00:50:30,640
I think. And I was like, you know, I should probably do this. Like I should probably just like

577
00:50:30,640 --> 00:50:36,320
pay for Photoshop and pay for a MacBook and all that stuff. And it's just been funny to see like

578
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:41,600
how hard I made things like in the developmental stage. But I think it's also

579
00:50:42,640 --> 00:50:48,000
like I said, coming from punk rock culture, you have a lot of DIY prove it to myself, you know,

580
00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:53,120
emotions tied to it and all that stuff. So that's I mean, again, that's the whole reason I got in

581
00:50:53,120 --> 00:50:58,160
a van and did this tour this year, because I always was jealous of like, you know, my other

582
00:50:58,160 --> 00:51:02,080
friends and bands that got to go on tour, I never got to do it. So I was like, cool, now I've done

583
00:51:02,080 --> 00:51:07,760
it. Now it's time to get back and like drive the business in different ways. So yeah, it's been

584
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:12,320
it's been a learning process this year for sure of like, what I want to do, what works, what doesn't

585
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:17,680
work. And it's always a learning process. It's always, you know, you know, that it's just it's

586
00:51:17,680 --> 00:51:21,280
always fighting with yourself and trying to figure it out.

587
00:51:21,280 --> 00:51:28,560
So I trajectory of this of this podcast has been awesome, but we're headed towards mental

588
00:51:28,560 --> 00:51:34,000
health stuff. And I wanted to give enough time because I want to know, like all your ties to

589
00:51:34,000 --> 00:51:40,800
that and why that's like the big thing that we're like partnering with and stuff. But before we do

590
00:51:40,800 --> 00:51:47,200
that, tell me about this tour. Okay, how big was it actually supposed to be? And then when did

591
00:51:47,200 --> 00:51:52,640
burnout start to set in where you were like this can't happen? Yeah, great question.

592
00:51:54,240 --> 00:51:57,600
And yeah, definitely do you want to talk about the mental health aspect of it for sure, because

593
00:51:57,600 --> 00:52:02,080
that has actually changed a lot for me too personally. Yeah, so like I think that's that's

594
00:52:02,080 --> 00:52:07,600
something I haven't really been able to talk about publicly. So the tour, like I said, I disappeared

595
00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:13,600
last year. I didn't really make anything last year. The only project that I did last year was a

596
00:52:13,600 --> 00:52:20,080
city of Las Vegas utility box. I painted like 10 or 12 utility boxes for the city of Las Vegas.

597
00:52:20,800 --> 00:52:25,200
And I know of like, I say that I'm like, that is actually a really cool project. But for that's

598
00:52:25,200 --> 00:52:30,160
the only thing I did last year. And I, you know, like I just started going through my savings.

599
00:52:30,160 --> 00:52:35,680
And I just, you know, I was just like, I need to I think I need this year to just regroup. Because

600
00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:41,280
and I'm answering a question about the tour, but I have to give preface to it first. That way

601
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:48,480
this tour makes sense. I told you I worked at Zappos, Tony Shay, who was the CEO died tragically

602
00:52:48,480 --> 00:52:53,520
in 2020. And he was a friend of mine. He was a mentor of mine. He was someone that I loved dearly

603
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:59,200
that loved me in his own ways in return, right? His love language was his love language was

604
00:52:59,200 --> 00:53:03,760
putting on for his friends. And so I'd never asked anything from Tony, but he allowed me

605
00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:09,600
so many different things that I'm still finding out about. And so like I told you that I was the

606
00:53:09,600 --> 00:53:15,920
only employee to be on Zappos. I had no idea because he never told me that it was it everyone said

607
00:53:15,920 --> 00:53:21,520
no at the company. He's the one that said yes, that made it happen. And he never told me that

608
00:53:22,160 --> 00:53:25,040
like it brings a tear to my eye because I'm like, Jesus Christ, Tony, like,

609
00:53:25,600 --> 00:53:29,840
what the fuck, you know, like, and he was just such a beautiful like how, how often do you

610
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:34,400
meet a billionaire and one, I mean, how often do you meet a billionaire within two? How often do

611
00:53:34,400 --> 00:53:39,120
you meet a billionaire that just wants people to be happy? It's like unheard of, like that's

612
00:53:39,120 --> 00:53:45,120
unheard of. And he genuinely wanted that. He genuinely wanted people to be happy and live

613
00:53:45,120 --> 00:53:50,080
their truth and live their creative self of like, what do you want? And how do I make it? How do I

614
00:53:50,080 --> 00:53:54,880
help it easy, like make it easier for you? And he wasn't an artist. He wasn't a creative person by

615
00:53:54,880 --> 00:53:58,960
nature. But everything that he thought and everything the way he thought was so creative in

616
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:06,000
such a beautiful artistic way, right? So when he passed in 2020, I started experiencing very small

617
00:54:06,000 --> 00:54:11,040
those emotions of when my grandpa passed it in a different way. It wasn't like a person that I

618
00:54:11,040 --> 00:54:15,760
grew up with, but I kind of did like, you know, I worked there for almost 10 years, like, I hung

619
00:54:15,760 --> 00:54:21,440
out, I went to, you know, we, you know, we hung out like all that stuff. Like the last time I saw him

620
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:27,120
was 2019. And it was at this place called the El Cortez, which is like this little like really

621
00:54:27,120 --> 00:54:34,640
divey hotel downtown. And I remember I asked him about this festival that I was going to do and

622
00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:39,360
it was put on by someone that they had beef. Like it was the guy that started life as beautiful.

623
00:54:39,360 --> 00:54:43,840
He's a friend of mine. I'm friends with Tony. And so I wanted to respect both of them and just see

624
00:54:43,840 --> 00:54:47,120
like where they were because I was kind of playing middleman. I didn't want to step on anybody's toes.

625
00:54:47,120 --> 00:54:50,640
So I went to dinner with the guy from life is beautiful. He told me the full story of what

626
00:54:50,640 --> 00:54:55,200
happened. I was like, man, I'm so sorry, like that's crazy. So then the next night I was with Tony,

627
00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:58,640
and I was like, Hey, you know, like I was out with him and I just wanted you to know like,

628
00:54:59,440 --> 00:55:03,200
there's an opportunity for me to do something really cool. But like out of respect, do you think

629
00:55:03,200 --> 00:55:07,920
I should do it? And even though he had all this beef or whatever happened between them, he just

630
00:55:07,920 --> 00:55:11,840
looked at me and said, Is it good for you? And I said, Yeah, I think it'd be a good opportunity.

631
00:55:11,840 --> 00:55:16,800
He goes, What does it matter? My opinion. He's like, you should do it. And I just looked at him

632
00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:20,000
and like I had tears in my eyes because I'd never really told him how much he meant to me. And no

633
00:55:20,000 --> 00:55:24,720
one ever did because he was an intimidating figure by nature with, you know, like when someone's

634
00:55:24,720 --> 00:55:28,800
that powerful or has that much money or whatever. And so I just looked at him and I had tears in

635
00:55:28,800 --> 00:55:32,720
my eyes and I was like, dude, you mean so much to me and I love you as a human being. And I'm so

636
00:55:32,720 --> 00:55:37,600
thankful for you. You've changed my life in ways that you will never know. And he had like, he

637
00:55:37,600 --> 00:55:41,040
didn't know how to deal with this emotion. So he had some tears in his eyes too. But he had a thing

638
00:55:41,040 --> 00:55:45,840
where like for net was his shot of choice, like it was like his introduction, like, that was his

639
00:55:45,840 --> 00:55:50,160
thing, like it was his initiation, basically. And so he goes, Let's do a shot. And so we did a shot

640
00:55:50,160 --> 00:55:53,920
of for net. And then the rest of the night, we went to this place called the bunkhouse. He, you

641
00:55:53,920 --> 00:55:57,680
know, it was a group of us, he bought food for everybody. And then his other love language was

642
00:55:57,680 --> 00:56:02,160
making soup for people. So we went back to his communal living area, which was like all air streams

643
00:56:02,160 --> 00:56:05,600
and he made soup for us. And I remember I'll play two or three in the morning that night,

644
00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:10,240
which was way past my bedtime. And I was just very thankful that I got that because it was

645
00:56:10,240 --> 00:56:14,080
something that I didn't normally do because I was so focused on growing the brand that was my

646
00:56:14,080 --> 00:56:18,800
obsession. Like, I was obsessed with it. I didn't leave the house. Like I just was like focused on

647
00:56:18,800 --> 00:56:23,680
making this brand. And I was so glad that I decided to go out that night and have that one last

648
00:56:23,680 --> 00:56:28,720
memory with him because you never know when someone's going to be gone, right? So long story

649
00:56:28,720 --> 00:56:34,080
short, I deal with these emotions. I'm trying to figure out like, okay, like this is crazy.

650
00:56:34,080 --> 00:56:39,040
Two years go by, I'm still not breathing correctly because like he's still coming up in

651
00:56:39,040 --> 00:56:44,000
conversation. Like he's, you know, in Vegas, he's a he's like the Wizard of Oz. Like everybody

652
00:56:44,000 --> 00:56:48,880
always talks about this huge loss for the community for culture. Like, he just put on so heavily

653
00:56:48,880 --> 00:56:55,600
for people. And so last year, I think it hit me in a really difficult way where it was one,

654
00:56:55,600 --> 00:57:00,720
10 years since I lost my grandpa. And then two, I wasn't grieving, right? The loss of Tony. And it

655
00:57:00,720 --> 00:57:05,600
just hit me in really, really deep and crazy ways that like I had to just disappear because if I

656
00:57:05,600 --> 00:57:11,520
didn't, I was going to, you know, maybe self harm or whatever was going to happen. I didn't know.

657
00:57:11,520 --> 00:57:15,920
And so out of respect for the brand, out of respect for what this brand has stood for for

658
00:57:15,920 --> 00:57:20,640
people out of respect for what it is evolving into, whatever, I took a step back and just was like,

659
00:57:20,640 --> 00:57:24,960
I had to deal with my emotions and maybe not in healthy ways, but I did deal with them. And I'm,

660
00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:31,040
you know, healed from it now. So then this year, I, this has been a rebuild year for me. And I

661
00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:34,720
know from like a social media standpoint, it doesn't look like that from a social media standpoint,

662
00:57:34,720 --> 00:57:39,520
you just put the highlights, you just put like, you know, positive, you don't get to see that like,

663
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:44,000
damn, dude, I'm just happy to be here, you know, like, I'm just happy to like be alive.

664
00:57:44,000 --> 00:57:48,560
And so this year, during the beginning of it, I was like, All right, it's crunch time, let's do it.

665
00:57:48,560 --> 00:57:52,640
I started working 16 hour days again, I started just like getting back on the computer, I started

666
00:57:52,640 --> 00:57:57,680
studying design, I started studying all these different things. I started figuring out what I

667
00:57:57,680 --> 00:58:03,680
wanted to be as an artist this year. And I was approached by this NFT project called the not

668
00:58:03,680 --> 00:58:09,280
okay bears. And they decided they asked me if they could use the name for us to do a co event

669
00:58:10,080 --> 00:58:16,400
called depressing not okay. And I was like, usually I'm pretty, I usually I say no to things like

670
00:58:16,400 --> 00:58:24,000
this because you know, there's just so much things like this now, there's so many wellness events,

671
00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:30,080
there's so many things of people. It's almost like snake oil salesman now where it's like,

672
00:58:30,080 --> 00:58:33,680
people are always like, you know, come to this event, you'll be healed, you'll be, you know,

673
00:58:33,680 --> 00:58:37,520
like come talk about your depression. And I was just like, I was careful, it's trepidatious about

674
00:58:37,520 --> 00:58:42,320
it. But after talking to them more, I realized that like, their project stands for autism acceptance,

675
00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:46,880
and that's very important to me too. And so I was like, cool, you can handle that side of it,

676
00:58:46,880 --> 00:58:52,080
I'll just talk about my brand and what we've done. And like, I never claimed to be anything that I'm

677
00:58:52,080 --> 00:58:56,800
not. And so I just know that like, you know, my brand stands for this, because I've experienced

678
00:58:56,800 --> 00:59:00,960
this. And people get their own attachments to people get their own experiences with it, it took

679
00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:06,160
me a long time to realize that and figure that out. So long story short, that event happens,

680
00:59:06,160 --> 00:59:12,880
I set up a booth for the first time in damn near 10 years. And people just were like happy to see

681
00:59:12,880 --> 00:59:17,360
me. And I was like, Oh, shit, like, I'm happy to see people too. Like this is so different.

682
00:59:17,920 --> 00:59:23,760
And so because of that, I went home and I was like, I'm gonna book a tour. And I was like,

683
00:59:23,760 --> 00:59:27,600
like no one tells you you can just book a tour. Yeah, you can do it yourself, you know, like

684
00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:31,840
you can do it yourself. Like, you don't need to rely on anybody else. Like you could just do it.

685
00:59:31,840 --> 00:59:35,680
Like you could if you want to go do something like book a tour, then you can do it. So I started

686
00:59:35,680 --> 00:59:39,120
just doing a lot of research and started figuring out what was coming up. I started just applying

687
00:59:39,120 --> 00:59:43,920
to everything. I just started figuring out like a schedule. And I started hitting like,

688
00:59:43,920 --> 00:59:49,040
I did a first Friday here in Vegas for the first time in May. And it was the first time I had done

689
00:59:49,040 --> 00:59:57,120
one in since 2011 2012. And right away, people were coming up like, Oh my God, you did the utility

690
00:59:57,120 --> 01:00:01,120
boxes, you did the murals, you you're on hot topic. I was like, I was like, shit, like people

691
01:00:01,120 --> 01:00:05,920
remember me like I disappeared, but doesn't mean I disappeared from other people. And that's a

692
01:00:05,920 --> 01:00:10,960
powerful thing to experience, you know, like to feel like you have left people physically or

693
01:00:10,960 --> 01:00:16,640
emotionally or spiritually. And then to be seen like that was eyeopening for me where I was like,

694
01:00:16,640 --> 01:00:22,480
Oh, shit, okay, I'm an idiot. I'm looking at this all wrong. Like, let's go, you know. And so from

695
01:00:22,480 --> 01:00:28,560
that first Friday, I then I was accepted into like, like I said, five points festival, I figured

696
01:00:28,560 --> 01:00:34,640
out a really cool San Diego Comic Con schedule, which I just got back from I did my first signing

697
01:00:34,640 --> 01:00:40,160
at San Diego Comic Con, which was like I said, just surreal, had a line around the booth, I

698
01:00:40,160 --> 01:00:45,760
sketched for a full hour that I was allotted. I also, because of the writer's strike, artists of

699
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:51,760
my caliber were given more opportunities, which was cool. So like, I got to like, walk a red carpet

700
01:00:51,760 --> 01:00:56,960
for the first time, like, did give interviews as an artist, like, that's a herd of like, that stuff

701
01:00:56,960 --> 01:01:01,200
does not happen unless we're in this current climate of like, you know, writer strikes trying to get

702
01:01:01,200 --> 01:01:07,360
their fair pay and stuff. And so it's just been like this really wild whirlwind of three months,

703
01:01:07,360 --> 01:01:14,160
where halfway through, I started realizing I was missing out on, like, personal things like

704
01:01:14,160 --> 01:01:18,000
birthdays, like I missed my mom's birthday for the first time, because all my family's in Vegas,

705
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:22,000
and like, I don't know, like my mom is my world, you know, so like, I don't want to miss my mom's

706
01:01:22,000 --> 01:01:27,040
birthday, like, my parents are getting older, I love them, like I want to spend time with them. And

707
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:33,280
I started missing like, you know, events with friends. And like, I was on this, this crazy week

708
01:01:33,280 --> 01:01:38,080
where I had four events in one week during fourth of July week. And I, and that's the week that I

709
01:01:38,080 --> 01:01:43,440
told you I drove 2000 miles. And I went to five different cities, in the matter of like four or

710
01:01:43,440 --> 01:01:48,800
five days, and I ended it by going to a friend's bachelor party in Utah up in the mountains.

711
01:01:48,800 --> 01:01:54,240
And I was like, I hadn't slept for like two days. And I'm driving that I fell asleep in a Smith's

712
01:01:54,240 --> 01:01:59,760
parking lot. And then the sun comes up, and I drive up a mountain. And then I get into the house

713
01:01:59,760 --> 01:02:03,680
for this bachelor party. And I lay down, as soon as I lay down, everybody starts waking up. And

714
01:02:03,680 --> 01:02:08,080
then I go on a five mile hike with my friends, because it's the bachelor party. And I'm like,

715
01:02:08,080 --> 01:02:13,760
I cannot physically do this. Like, I'm not getting any younger. Today's my birthday. I'm getting older.

716
01:02:13,760 --> 01:02:21,520
Like, I have to be like realistic about what I can and can't do. And so I remember that weekend,

717
01:02:21,520 --> 01:02:25,840
it was this beautiful weekend with like my high school friends that I've known for 20 years,

718
01:02:25,840 --> 01:02:29,360
like just one of those like really special moments where you look around, you go,

719
01:02:29,360 --> 01:02:34,160
I'm really blessed to know these people still and that they still love me and that I, you know,

720
01:02:34,160 --> 01:02:38,480
like that's a that's a that's a rare thing. And so I came home from that and I was like,

721
01:02:38,480 --> 01:02:44,400
I can't do it. I can't do it anymore. And so I was supposed to go on tour with Hawthorne Heights

722
01:02:44,400 --> 01:02:50,240
and Seusson and all these like emo bands, and it was going to be really good for public outreach.

723
01:02:50,240 --> 01:02:56,080
But I just realized I wasn't ready for it, that I'm not ready for the the emotional turmoil that

724
01:02:56,080 --> 01:03:00,160
comes with it. And also from a booth standpoint, I have some work to do on my booth that like I'm

725
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:03,840
going through a full rebrand right now that I had to be honest about it. Opportunities like that

726
01:03:03,840 --> 01:03:08,640
will always be there. But like, I won't always be here if I keep, you know, working like that.

727
01:03:08,640 --> 01:03:12,640
And so I just had to be really honest about it. And I hate saying no to opportunities that I

728
01:03:12,640 --> 01:03:17,520
truly believe in because I think they're rare, but like, even more rare as being able to even get

729
01:03:17,520 --> 01:03:22,640
up in the morning. So I don't know, like, I just had to be honest about it. And so this is, I just

730
01:03:22,640 --> 01:03:27,200
canceled it last week, I canceled the rest of the tour. This month, instead, I'm going to do like,

731
01:03:28,160 --> 01:03:32,480
local things. So I just did first Friday, last week, I'm starting to do my live streams again

732
01:03:32,480 --> 01:03:37,200
once a week and connect with like, my fans there that like love to just hang out and be goofy on

733
01:03:37,200 --> 01:03:42,720
stream. And then I have another depression, not okay on the 12th, which I'm really excited about.

734
01:03:42,720 --> 01:03:48,080
This is the first time that, this is the first time that I've curated vendors for it. So I have a

735
01:03:48,080 --> 01:03:52,640
list of like 15 vendors that are going to come out, show, you know, show their paintings for

736
01:03:52,640 --> 01:03:56,720
sometimes, you know, some people, this is the first time they've ever shown their work. And that's

737
01:03:56,720 --> 01:04:04,000
like, I want to be there as a, as like a guide almost, you know, to be like, Hey, this is awesome,

738
01:04:04,000 --> 01:04:07,920
you're doing awesome. Let's, you know, like, I have another event, please come out to the other

739
01:04:07,920 --> 01:04:12,720
event and I don't charge them like it's a free, you know, if I can, if I can offer that as like a

740
01:04:12,720 --> 01:04:17,680
free thing to do, just so you can make money off your art. Cool, like that's what I want to be

741
01:04:18,320 --> 01:04:22,960
for cultivating culture here in Vegas, because that's really, really frigging important to me

742
01:04:22,960 --> 01:04:29,600
because nobody else is doing it. Like Vegas is such a town devoid of culture that like,

743
01:04:29,600 --> 01:04:34,400
if I'm not doing it, then who is, then who's going to step up and do that for other artists?

744
01:04:34,400 --> 01:04:38,240
Because no one did it for me. I wish someone had helped me in that way. So I want to be able to do

745
01:04:38,240 --> 01:04:44,240
that for, for other people, because I think it's important. Yeah, which man, that's, thank you for

746
01:04:44,240 --> 01:04:49,520
telling me all that. And it's your birthday. You did this interview on your birthday. Happy birthday.

747
01:04:49,520 --> 01:04:52,960
Happy birthday. I mean, this is, thank you, dude. I mean, this is the best birthday present I can

748
01:04:52,960 --> 01:04:57,120
get. I love, I love doing podcasts and I've been looking forward to speaking with you and it just

749
01:04:57,120 --> 01:05:04,320
kind of worked out that it was today, which is nice. Yeah, you know, it's, it's crazy one to hear

750
01:05:04,320 --> 01:05:09,440
that you were going to go on tour with Seosan and Hawthorne Heights, like the emo inside me from

751
01:05:09,440 --> 01:05:16,160
when I was a kid. I remember seeing them at an underground show venue in Fresno, California,

752
01:05:16,160 --> 01:05:21,600
and not knowing the hell they were and seeing them and then all of a sudden buying their first

753
01:05:21,600 --> 01:05:26,480
albums and it was like, what is happening here? It was cool. That's so sick, dude. Yeah. I mean,

754
01:05:26,480 --> 01:05:33,200
that music is really important to me. I think the first time that my eyes opened to the brand was,

755
01:05:33,200 --> 01:05:36,800
I was hanging out with Bert McCracken from the used. He would, I had a, I had a friend that

756
01:05:36,800 --> 01:05:40,800
used to go on tour with them and make clothing for him. And so he was always gracious enough to

757
01:05:40,800 --> 01:05:44,880
be like, Hey, Ryan, come hang out with us. And I was like, okay. And so Bert like kind of became

758
01:05:44,880 --> 01:05:49,760
a friend and I have a picture of us together where he's wearing a Euroman shirt. And I was like,

759
01:05:49,760 --> 01:05:55,920
damn, like this band saved my life in college, literally. And now I'm like, I get to just be

760
01:05:55,920 --> 01:06:00,720
around him and like be backstage with them. And like, it was just surreal. And so that's,

761
01:06:00,720 --> 01:06:04,560
that was kind of like the emotions that I went into with this where it was like, cool. Now I get to

762
01:06:04,560 --> 01:06:10,160
be a part of the experience for other people, you know, finding emo music or enjoying it and all

763
01:06:10,160 --> 01:06:15,040
that stuff. And I was really excited about it. But like, I'm just not ready for it right now. And

764
01:06:15,040 --> 01:06:20,560
it sucks. Like I wish I was like, I have an email right now in my inbox where it's like,

765
01:06:21,680 --> 01:06:25,600
I might like, I'm like, going back and forth on it, we're like, should I just do one of them?

766
01:06:25,600 --> 01:06:30,320
Should I just do one of the dates? Like just experience it. And I'm like, I just don't know

767
01:06:30,320 --> 01:06:35,040
if I can like, I was supposed to like, it was supposed to be like a 10 city tour with them

768
01:06:35,040 --> 01:06:42,080
of like, I think we're going to like Ohio, Tennessee, California, like just all these

769
01:06:42,080 --> 01:06:46,080
different cities, Lake Tahoe was one of them. And I just, you know, it just got to a point

770
01:06:46,080 --> 01:06:52,240
where I couldn't do it. Yeah. Well, if you do do one show, make California the show, make Southern

771
01:06:52,240 --> 01:06:58,880
California the show. Yeah. Yeah. Silverado, California, you know where that is? I don't

772
01:06:58,880 --> 01:07:01,760
know where that's at. Is that Southern California? No, I don't think so. Yeah, I didn't even look at

773
01:07:01,760 --> 01:07:05,520
the, I don't think so either. I'd never heard of it because I'm a West Coast guy. So like, you know,

774
01:07:05,520 --> 01:07:10,240
I know California pretty well. And yeah, I've never heard of it either. But I don't know. I want to

775
01:07:10,240 --> 01:07:15,360
so bad just because that music is so important to me. And plus it's like, oh, bands, I think

776
01:07:15,360 --> 01:07:21,600
alkaline trio is playing it bad religions on it. Like all these bands, I just grew up worshiping,

777
01:07:21,600 --> 01:07:26,960
you know, like skating to and stuff like, I don't know. It's tough. It's really tough to say no to

778
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:31,360
an opportunity like that because I feel like what I'm trying to rebrand to press monsters into just

779
01:07:31,360 --> 01:07:36,880
falls so much in line with that culture and emo music in general that I'm like embracing it more

780
01:07:36,880 --> 01:07:41,600
because I've, I think I've just been so isolated in the approach that it's like, now I know what

781
01:07:41,600 --> 01:07:46,800
to kind of tie the horse to and be like, no, like it isn't, I have an emo brand, you know what I mean?

782
01:07:46,800 --> 01:07:52,560
Like it is an emo brand, even from the designs or the look and feel or just me as a person,

783
01:07:52,560 --> 01:07:58,160
like that's what it is. And so that was the whole idea with it. But yeah, I don't know, maybe next

784
01:07:58,160 --> 01:08:03,760
year, I'm hoping next year. Yeah. And this fits right into the conversation going towards

785
01:08:03,760 --> 01:08:11,280
the mental health side of depressed ministers and really the purpose that you've kind of given this

786
01:08:11,280 --> 01:08:19,440
and built into this brand and tell us a little bit about what that's like, like what open up about

787
01:08:19,440 --> 01:08:25,840
this, how these are so intertwined, this mental health thing in year men and how it all works

788
01:08:25,840 --> 01:08:32,320
together. I think it's been for me personally, it's been a journey. I kind of got thrust into it,

789
01:08:32,320 --> 01:08:36,880
like I'm not gonna lie, I kind of got thrust into it. The whole reason this brand exists is

790
01:08:36,880 --> 01:08:42,720
what one already told you because my grandpa, but the only reason it exists as a brand is because I

791
01:08:42,720 --> 01:08:48,880
put my story on a blog post that I think is still up. And it was basically just detailing like, hey,

792
01:08:48,880 --> 01:08:52,960
I know you bought a shirt of this character, or you've seen me posting about it. But like,

793
01:08:52,960 --> 01:08:57,120
this is what it actually is. And I started, I detailed the story about my grandpa in like this

794
01:08:57,120 --> 01:09:03,840
really long blog post. And people just like were so supportive and just like, holy shit, I knew

795
01:09:03,840 --> 01:09:09,600
something was, you know, like with it, but I didn't realize like the depth of it, right? And so

796
01:09:11,200 --> 01:09:18,400
it was like, it was crazy to just be like, okay, you know, this was scary to do, but I put the

797
01:09:18,400 --> 01:09:22,240
blog post out, like, I'm glad people are being kind about it. And then all of a sudden, I get a

798
01:09:22,240 --> 01:09:27,440
call from the Jed Foundation, and they go, Hey, we saw your blog post, someone shared it, we saw it,

799
01:09:27,440 --> 01:09:33,760
we want to invite you out to craft your story into a motivational talk with the moth. And I was

800
01:09:33,760 --> 01:09:37,760
like, damn, dude, like I listened to NPR all the time, like I love the moth, like that's cool.

801
01:09:38,320 --> 01:09:42,160
And so I was like, all right, cool, and happened to coincide with the work trip that I was already

802
01:09:42,160 --> 01:09:46,320
taking for Zappos. And so I was like, okay, I'll just double it up, I'll stay an extra week,

803
01:09:46,320 --> 01:09:55,920
do the moth thing, then I'll go do the work trip or whatever. And so, so I remember this was 20,

804
01:09:55,920 --> 01:10:01,120
I think this was 2014, 2013, maybe 20, maybe even before that, I can't remember everything kind of

805
01:10:01,120 --> 01:10:06,800
like is lumping together at this point. But I remember it was the winter time, and I didn't

806
01:10:06,800 --> 01:10:11,200
pack right for it. So like my shoes were like, I wore like roaches, remember like the Nike

807
01:10:11,200 --> 01:10:15,040
roaches shoes or whatever, everyone's like making fun of you, like, dude, you're slipping in the

808
01:10:15,040 --> 01:10:20,000
snow. It's like, I don't know what I'm doing from the desert. And I remember being just so scared

809
01:10:20,000 --> 01:10:25,680
and so intimidated, but also like feeling like, okay, this is my grandpa, like this is my grandpa

810
01:10:25,680 --> 01:10:29,920
laying out a path for me, I feel like. So I'm going to take this seriously. I was scared to death,

811
01:10:29,920 --> 01:10:34,000
I went to, I was in this little warehouse in Brooklyn. And this is going to sound,

812
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:37,120
I don't usually tell this story because it sounds kind of like,

813
01:10:38,160 --> 01:10:42,240
supernatural almost, but I believe in these things. And so I think it's important to talk about,

814
01:10:42,240 --> 01:10:45,600
I'm a spiritual person, like by nature, I think it's important to talk about this stuff. And

815
01:10:45,600 --> 01:10:52,160
like I said, I think art is supernatural and spiritual nature. So I remember we had one day

816
01:10:52,160 --> 01:10:57,360
where it was basically the moth being like, hey, this is what we do. These are the stories,

817
01:10:57,360 --> 01:11:01,840
we're going to have some examples, all that stuff, you know, tonight, just go back to your hotel and,

818
01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:06,800
you know, relax, but tomorrow is when the work begins. I was like, all right, cool. So the first

819
01:11:06,800 --> 01:11:09,760
day was very just like, cool, I'm just getting comfortable with my skin, they're doing like

820
01:11:09,760 --> 01:11:12,960
interviews with us because they're going to share them to like, we were working with like

821
01:11:12,960 --> 01:11:17,440
Sachi and Sachi, which is like a big medical provider and all that stuff. And I was just like,

822
01:11:17,440 --> 01:11:22,720
this is crazy, like I can't believe I get to do this. And so I remember going home that night,

823
01:11:22,720 --> 01:11:26,080
or it's back to the hotel, and I was just like relaxing, I was like, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna

824
01:11:26,080 --> 01:11:30,000
take this seriously tomorrow. I started thinking of ideas of like, all right, well, I know the story

825
01:11:30,000 --> 01:11:34,400
because my story, my grandpa died, he was this, how much do I want to tell, how much am I comfortable

826
01:11:34,400 --> 01:11:41,200
telling? And I go to sleep, I wake up the next day. And I told you that my grandpa was a 33rd

827
01:11:41,200 --> 01:11:47,520
degree mason, right? He has always communicated with me through lights. And through the mason

828
01:11:47,520 --> 01:11:51,680
symbology and all that stuff, there's always lanterns. And so I have a feeling that maybe

829
01:11:51,680 --> 01:11:56,480
something he learned is about communicating through lights. I don't know. There's a lot of

830
01:11:56,480 --> 01:12:02,160
theories about the masons. I don't know, like, I went to him, I went with him for one, for one

831
01:12:02,160 --> 01:12:08,000
meeting, you can read about on my blog. He tried to he tried to bring me in from a first degree

832
01:12:08,000 --> 01:12:15,360
standpoint. It wasn't for me. It is what it is, right? So I think, I think what I believe this,

833
01:12:15,360 --> 01:12:18,800
I don't know if it's true. Again, like everyone has their their ways of people communicating

834
01:12:18,800 --> 01:12:23,040
from the afterlife. For me, it's lights, whenever I think about them or talk to or, you know,

835
01:12:23,040 --> 01:12:27,120
want to talk to him lights flicker. There's been very there's been a lot of moments of this.

836
01:12:28,080 --> 01:12:32,000
And I'm only saying this stuff. So maybe this makes more sense when I tell the actual story.

837
01:12:32,000 --> 01:12:38,640
But we went to a remembrance forum at the mason's hall, the mason hall here in Vegas. This was

838
01:12:38,640 --> 01:12:42,160
probably like two years after he passed there, they're putting a painting of him in the in the

839
01:12:42,160 --> 01:12:47,760
lodge. And I was with my grandma's with my uncle, who's also a mason, as my aunt and all this stuff.

840
01:12:47,760 --> 01:12:52,400
And we were sitting there as soon as they said his name, the light above me and my uncle started

841
01:12:52,400 --> 01:12:56,960
flickering. And we were the two that went with him to a meeting. And I was like, okay, and everybody

842
01:12:56,960 --> 01:13:01,280
noticed it. Like, it wasn't just us. It was like, okay, like, everyone was like, Oh, hey, Casey,

843
01:13:01,280 --> 01:13:04,880
you know what I mean? Like, and so I was like, yeah, okay, this has happened to me like separately.

844
01:13:04,880 --> 01:13:08,720
And I told my uncle that. And, you know, it's hard to tell people that stuff, because sometimes

845
01:13:08,720 --> 01:13:12,720
they don't buy into it or they don't believe it and all that stuff. But I was like, okay, that's

846
01:13:12,720 --> 01:13:19,520
weird. So I'm in Brooklyn. I take the train in, you know, I go into the warehouse for the second

847
01:13:19,520 --> 01:13:25,520
day of this stuff. And I'm nervous. And I do this thing where like, the morning time that you're

848
01:13:25,520 --> 01:13:29,440
working one on one with someone from the moth, they're helping you craft your beats, they're

849
01:13:29,440 --> 01:13:33,680
helping you, you know, outline your story and all that stuff. And then the afternoon was when you

850
01:13:33,680 --> 01:13:38,240
practice it in front of everybody. And then that night is when you do it for real with cameras in

851
01:13:38,240 --> 01:13:41,920
front of a live audience. And you know, with their metal guitar music and all that stuff. Right.

852
01:13:41,920 --> 01:13:47,120
So I'm, I'm fucking scared, dude, like I am just like, I'm praying, I'm like, I'm trying to talk to

853
01:13:47,120 --> 01:13:52,640
my grandpa, like all this stuff. So we had this break before it was after we crafted our stories,

854
01:13:52,640 --> 01:13:56,960
it was before we were supposed to tell them in front of the class and all this stuff. And I went

855
01:13:56,960 --> 01:14:03,120
outside and I closed my eyes and I was like, I was like, please just, you know, if just give me a

856
01:14:03,120 --> 01:14:07,040
sign that I'm doing the right thing, because I was nervous, I didn't want to tell us if it wasn't

857
01:14:07,040 --> 01:14:12,000
respectful, I didn't want to tell a story that might disrespect the, you know, the memory of my

858
01:14:12,000 --> 01:14:16,720
grandpa. And so I always want to be respectful. And so I remember just like, I was like, close my

859
01:14:16,720 --> 01:14:22,640
eyes and I feel the snow on me, I feel the coldness of the winter in New York. And I was like, all

860
01:14:22,640 --> 01:14:29,040
right, I feel like I feel at peace right now, I'm just going to go do it. So I go back inside. And

861
01:14:29,040 --> 01:14:32,480
I was so nervous that like they're asking what order they want everyone to go in and people

862
01:14:32,480 --> 01:14:36,880
are like, I'll go next, I'll go next. And so I'm trying to go second to last, because if you're

863
01:14:36,880 --> 01:14:42,240
second to last, you get forgotten because people only remember the last person, right? So I'm about

864
01:14:42,240 --> 01:14:46,160
to go second to last and I go to put my hand up and someone jumps up and goes in front of me, I go,

865
01:14:46,160 --> 01:14:51,760
you have to be kidding me. Now I'm the last person. This sucks. So because I didn't have a lot of like

866
01:14:51,760 --> 01:14:56,000
public experience, you know, public speaking experience. So this is where it gets crazy.

867
01:14:56,640 --> 01:15:01,120
And again, like, you can, you know, say this is hoopla or whatever, but this actually happened.

868
01:15:02,560 --> 01:15:07,600
We are the person ends and they kill it, like they're just their story is so good. I'm like,

869
01:15:07,600 --> 01:15:14,000
gosh, shit, like, we'll see like what what happens now. So I go up there and I start my story. And

870
01:15:14,000 --> 01:15:19,280
I tell it in a more like I tell with more details than I tell it on podcasts or interviews, like

871
01:15:19,280 --> 01:15:24,080
I'm actually getting into the emotions of it all that stuff, right? And so I'm about a minute into

872
01:15:24,080 --> 01:15:29,440
it. And then I say my grandpa's name and all of a sudden I kid you not, the lights start flickering

873
01:15:29,440 --> 01:15:33,600
in the entire building and then the the heater behind me are in front of me. I can't remember

874
01:15:33,600 --> 01:15:40,880
start shaking and explodes. And everyone just starts looking around. So they had to like reboot this

875
01:15:40,880 --> 01:15:46,000
system. The heater was fried. And everyone's like, dude, what was that? And like, everyone's like,

876
01:15:46,000 --> 01:15:50,960
that's your grandpa. And I was like, I thought so too, right? So ever since that moment, I was like,

877
01:15:51,520 --> 01:15:56,320
damn, like, what am I here on earth to do? Like, is it like, what is it? Like, I'm

878
01:15:56,320 --> 01:16:00,560
trying to figure it out. And so long story short, that, you know, that that event went off, we did

879
01:16:00,560 --> 01:16:04,640
the moth thing. And so from then on, I was like, Okay, well, then I guess I'm going to start doing

880
01:16:04,640 --> 01:16:08,960
public speaking. And so then I got hired by like colleges and like, I would go tell the story of

881
01:16:08,960 --> 01:16:13,360
your man, you know, the one I did right before the pandemic, I got hired to do a talk at the

882
01:16:13,360 --> 01:16:18,000
college of North Dakota. So I was like, I went to North Dakota in the middle of winter. Like,

883
01:16:18,000 --> 01:16:23,120
it was Fargo, I went to Fargo. It was so cold. And so I was doing that for a while. But I wasn't

884
01:16:23,120 --> 01:16:27,840
being honest about like what it is, like, I never wanted to be a mental health advocate. It's not

885
01:16:27,840 --> 01:16:32,720
something that I wanted to do. Because I don't think I have any right to like, tell people,

886
01:16:33,520 --> 01:16:38,080
you know, Oh, this is how you do it. Or this is like, no, like, it's such a personal thing that

887
01:16:38,080 --> 01:16:43,040
happens to people that all I wanted to do was share my story. And just hopefully somebody

888
01:16:43,040 --> 01:16:47,920
can connect with it. And I think along the way I kind of got lost. And I think this happens to

889
01:16:47,920 --> 01:16:54,640
everybody that is in this industry, you battle your ego. And I think that like, I had a big ego

890
01:16:55,360 --> 01:17:00,080
at the beginning of this brand, I thought I was the shit. I was like, Yeah, I'm doing it. No one

891
01:17:00,080 --> 01:17:03,360
else is doing it. Because there really wasn't a lot. There wasn't anybody any other mental health

892
01:17:03,360 --> 01:17:06,960
brands at the time, like there really wasn't. Like there was to write love on our arms that had

893
01:17:06,960 --> 01:17:11,120
started in the early 2000s that you would see it warp to her and stuff. And that was my inspiration.

894
01:17:11,120 --> 01:17:15,040
Like I loved that brand. And I would always see it festivals and like, you know, warp tour and

895
01:17:15,040 --> 01:17:19,200
stuff like that. And so I think that's where I kind of got inspired for the brand. And then,

896
01:17:19,760 --> 01:17:23,520
like, there was there was just no other things happening. So I was like, Well, shit, I'm the

897
01:17:23,520 --> 01:17:27,600
one doing it now cool. Like, and I started just like, being kind of shitty, you know, I would

898
01:17:27,600 --> 01:17:31,600
just like, I, you know, it's going to therapy and all this stuff. And I would like, you know,

899
01:17:31,600 --> 01:17:35,280
kind of that thing where you kind of use therapy terms and like all that stuff and everybody does

900
01:17:35,280 --> 01:17:39,920
it. And so it wasn't until recently that I started just like really opening my eyes and just being

901
01:17:39,920 --> 01:17:44,400
like, fuck you, Ryan, like take the ego out of this shit. You know, like, I think it was like

902
01:17:44,400 --> 01:17:49,040
2019 that I really started to open my eyes and the pandemic just being so isolated. And then

903
01:17:49,040 --> 01:17:54,240
now recently this year, I'm like, fuck off, dude, like this isn't about you, man. It's never been

904
01:17:54,240 --> 01:17:58,080
about you. It's been about the character and it's been about the work and it's been about just like

905
01:17:59,120 --> 01:18:04,080
if your story can help somebody, then that's what's important. And that's kind of my, my,

906
01:18:04,080 --> 01:18:10,080
my path of like the mental health side of it. Yeah, which is incredible because it's like, you're

907
01:18:10,080 --> 01:18:16,480
using past experiences. I mean, trauma helps heal others, right? Self trauma helps heal so many.

908
01:18:16,480 --> 01:18:22,080
And so then you start to romanticize it. Yeah. Is what happens. So you start romanticizing your

909
01:18:22,080 --> 01:18:27,440
trauma and you start using it against people almost. Oh, my trauma is more hurtful than yours

910
01:18:27,440 --> 01:18:32,880
or my or I'm, I'm more pained. And that's just not fair. Like you have to respect other people's

911
01:18:32,880 --> 01:18:37,760
experiences and you have to like be able to respect that like people's depression, anxiety

912
01:18:37,760 --> 01:18:43,200
feels different and it's the most personal thing ever. Like when I'm anxious, I start sweating.

913
01:18:44,240 --> 01:18:48,560
Excuse me. Sorry. I started sweating and getting hot. I can't think straight. I started getting

914
01:18:48,560 --> 01:18:53,520
dizzy, but that's not how someone else's anxiety feels. My depression feels different than other

915
01:18:53,520 --> 01:18:57,840
people's depression. And so like, I think just taking the ego out of it and realizing that like

916
01:18:57,840 --> 01:19:02,560
all I'm supposed to do here is make things and just tell my story and just that's it.

917
01:19:02,560 --> 01:19:08,800
Like really helped because nobody can heal you. It's just not possible. A therapist can't heal

918
01:19:08,800 --> 01:19:14,080
you. A doctor can't heal you. All you can do is do the work and just hopefully you're on a journey

919
01:19:14,080 --> 01:19:19,440
that you can eventually see like see the light I feel like that's been my experience anyway.

920
01:19:20,080 --> 01:19:25,760
And it's crazy too to most people don't get to the point where they're like calling out their own

921
01:19:25,760 --> 01:19:31,600
ego, but you were able to not only like search the healing process, do all this stuff, help get

922
01:19:31,600 --> 01:19:37,200
your story out there, but then also check yourself in the midst of it, which is an incredible twist

923
01:19:37,200 --> 01:19:43,040
to that. It's been hard, man. Like I'm not going to lie. It's been extremely difficult to live in

924
01:19:43,040 --> 01:19:48,000
these emotions and look at the wrongs that I've done in the past. Like I've had to apologize to

925
01:19:48,000 --> 01:19:53,680
exes. I've had to apologize to ex friends. I've had to just really just like, I've just had to

926
01:19:53,680 --> 01:19:58,400
just be honest. And that was the hardest thing for me because I grew up in a and my childhood was

927
01:19:58,400 --> 01:20:03,520
so full of like lying all the time. And and I learned, you know, as an adult, like you grow up

928
01:20:03,520 --> 01:20:07,440
in Vegas, you start working at nightclub. You start, you know what I mean? Like it's easy to get lost

929
01:20:07,440 --> 01:20:12,480
in that kind of be a shitty dude. And I never wanted to admit that I was a shitty dude. I just

930
01:20:12,480 --> 01:20:18,640
never wanted to admit it. And it's like, once you can kind of just be like, you know, maybe I did

931
01:20:18,640 --> 01:20:23,680
hurt somebody and maybe I need to just come to terms with that. And just like the, I think the

932
01:20:23,680 --> 01:20:27,360
most important thing you can do is just be honest because you never want someone to feel like their

933
01:20:27,360 --> 01:20:31,920
experience is negated. For me personally, that's very important. Like I never wanted to negate

934
01:20:31,920 --> 01:20:37,280
someone else's experience in any way. And so if I did something, I want to own up to it. Like

935
01:20:37,280 --> 01:20:42,000
I that if you want to accept that, that's that means the world to me. And if you don't, that's

936
01:20:42,000 --> 01:20:46,480
your journey. And there's nothing I can do about that. And that's been the most freeing thing.

937
01:20:46,480 --> 01:20:51,280
Because like, you know, it's just not up to me anymore. It's just all I can do is just be honest

938
01:20:51,280 --> 01:21:01,680
and try to be as, as honest as possible. Yeah, with all of this, like the growth of your brand

939
01:21:01,680 --> 01:21:10,240
diving into this and this beautiful step into honesty, which can be the most hard thing ever

940
01:21:10,240 --> 01:21:15,680
to have to do. Oh yeah. And then looking at where you've come and where you're headed.

941
01:21:15,680 --> 01:21:21,600
The overarching question, what's next for depressed monsters? I think

942
01:21:26,960 --> 01:21:32,160
I mean, that's so I think I want to be more confident in my designs, right? So like, that's

943
01:21:32,160 --> 01:21:36,240
the most important thing to me is I want to be more confident in what I'm putting out there.

944
01:21:36,240 --> 01:21:41,440
And a lot of that has to do with just researching and studying and just figuring out what my look

945
01:21:41,440 --> 01:21:47,920
and feel is going to be going forward. Because it's to the immediate answer is a rebrand. So I'm

946
01:21:47,920 --> 01:21:54,320
rebranding the entire thing right now. I just I just built a really new website. The best possible

947
01:21:54,320 --> 01:21:59,120
one I was on tour, I would just go to coffee shops and build a website. And the beta version is up

948
01:21:59,120 --> 01:22:03,680
now. It shows the brand in a different way. On desktop, it shows this really cool video that

949
01:22:03,680 --> 01:22:07,120
my buddy Dalton filmed when I was painting a mural to show that it's like this is a clothing brand,

950
01:22:07,120 --> 01:22:12,160
but it's also artist run, which I think is important. Because it's such a you know, it's

951
01:22:12,160 --> 01:22:17,920
different than like other brands. And if you go on mobile, it shows your man one of my sculpts

952
01:22:17,920 --> 01:22:20,880
like spinning, which is cool to show the character and all that stuff. So I think the immediate

953
01:22:20,880 --> 01:22:27,200
answer is a rebrand, and also a regroup, like I want to figure out what it is that I want this brand

954
01:22:27,200 --> 01:22:32,320
to be going into 2024. And so right now I'm working on a winter collection that I'm excited about,

955
01:22:32,320 --> 01:22:37,120
we're going to start doing drops for the first time. I've always like the way I've done my brand

956
01:22:37,120 --> 01:22:42,560
is such like Illuminati Mason, you know, like if you know, you know, type thing, like if you

957
01:22:42,560 --> 01:22:46,720
happen to be on the website, maybe you can pick something up. And so I need to be better about

958
01:22:46,720 --> 01:22:52,800
just like, this is the drop, it includes xyz, you know, if you want it cool, like, thank you for

959
01:22:52,800 --> 01:22:59,520
supporting me. Also, like more varied product selections. So I've been very focused on like

960
01:22:59,520 --> 01:23:05,200
putting a design on a t shirt. And here you go. But now like I'm exploring like, what it is going

961
01:23:05,200 --> 01:23:10,000
forward? Is it like, I don't want to say we are doing this. But if you read between the lines,

962
01:23:10,000 --> 01:23:18,000
like, is it bootleg shoes? Is it jewelry? Is it, you know, what is it? And is it more cut and sew?

963
01:23:18,000 --> 01:23:23,600
Do we have something where it's like, yeah, you can get a $40 t shirt or a mystery bag or whatever.

964
01:23:23,600 --> 01:23:29,120
But I also want to offer $100 cut and sew really cool designer piece because yeah, that's cool.

965
01:23:29,120 --> 01:23:34,640
To me, like I'm super inspired by, I worked in couture for a couple of years there at Zappos,

966
01:23:34,640 --> 01:23:40,960
and I'm super inspired by designers like Vivian Westwood, who, you know, outfitted the sex pistols

967
01:23:40,960 --> 01:23:45,600
and has like this crazy, just cool look. And you know, when you have a Vivian Westwood piece,

968
01:23:45,600 --> 01:23:49,680
I want people to know when they have a depressed monsters piece. So it's, it's almost like the

969
01:23:49,680 --> 01:23:54,960
way I look at it is like, everything leading up to this was the brand growing up. Like it was the

970
01:23:54,960 --> 01:23:59,520
child years, it was the teenage years. Now a depressed monsters is an adult and I need to treat

971
01:23:59,520 --> 01:24:03,760
it as such. Like what is this brand looking like as a grown up? Like I've been fortunate enough to

972
01:24:03,760 --> 01:24:09,120
be doing this for a lot longer than most people. Like running a brand is fucking hard. And it's,

973
01:24:09,120 --> 01:24:14,720
it's not easy. And the fact that I've been able to do this for damn near 10 years now is a testament

974
01:24:14,720 --> 01:24:19,920
to like, yes, hard work, but also like the way people receive the brand and the way people

975
01:24:19,920 --> 01:24:24,400
care about the brand. It's more about, to me, it's more about putting on for the people that have

976
01:24:24,400 --> 01:24:28,640
fucked with me for so long and making them proud. And that's, that's what gets me up in the morning

977
01:24:28,640 --> 01:24:33,920
is like, how can I make stuff that like you're proud to wear and that like, again, from the

978
01:24:33,920 --> 01:24:37,760
Illuminati standpoint, if you see another Euroman on someone's shirt, it's a, you know, you know

979
01:24:37,760 --> 01:24:42,160
type thing. I don't have to be out there putting, I'm depressed and cool on a shirt for you to know

980
01:24:42,160 --> 01:24:47,040
that I'm a mental health brand, because people are doing that and it's so phony. And it's so

981
01:24:47,040 --> 01:24:52,080
goddamn phony to me. And so I never want to devolve the brand into that because to me that is so

982
01:24:52,080 --> 01:24:57,040
lazy and stupid, because you're basically just buying into a social cause at that point. And

983
01:24:57,040 --> 01:25:01,040
I'm sorry, but like, that's not what this brand is. That's not what this brand will ever be. Like,

984
01:25:01,040 --> 01:25:05,840
it is a, if you know the story, if you know the touch points to the brand, that's more important

985
01:25:05,840 --> 01:25:10,560
to me because then it's a lifestyle. And it's, it's, it's something you can grow with along with

986
01:25:10,560 --> 01:25:15,360
me because I'm so open about like my own journey and stuff like that. And so yeah, I don't know,

987
01:25:15,360 --> 01:25:19,760
it's just crazy because like, I try not to get mad or angry about it, but there's just so many brands

988
01:25:19,760 --> 01:25:26,000
that rip me off and do that stuff where it's like, they take like, like I was, dude, I was in

989
01:25:26,000 --> 01:25:32,560
an ocean side, um, two weeks ago for tour, and I'm jogging down the, or I'm walking down the

990
01:25:32,560 --> 01:25:36,800
beach and I see someone in my shirt with the Skella heart on the back and I was like, dude,

991
01:25:36,800 --> 01:25:42,400
that's fucking crazy. Two minutes later, I'm at the coffee shop and I'm working, someone walked by

992
01:25:42,400 --> 01:25:47,200
with a rip off of the Skella heart shirt. It was like a half Skella heart Skella heart. And I was

993
01:25:47,200 --> 01:25:52,880
like, dude, I've had that designed copy written since like 2013, I think. Because again, I'm super

994
01:25:52,880 --> 01:25:58,240
inspired by designer toys. So I was being inspired by cause and anatomy and all that stuff. And so

995
01:25:58,240 --> 01:26:03,200
I can't like take full credit, but it's also like a trademark of my brand. And so it was just crazy,

996
01:26:03,200 --> 01:26:07,360
like the universe, if you pay attention, the universe will show you funny little things like

997
01:26:07,360 --> 01:26:13,360
that. Like to, to be in a different city and see someone skating down the boardwalk in my shirt,

998
01:26:13,360 --> 01:26:19,040
and then immediately after see a rip off of that shirt was like, come on, like that's funny. Like

999
01:26:19,040 --> 01:26:22,960
you got to laugh at that shit. So I think I would have gotten mad about stuff like that before,

1000
01:26:22,960 --> 01:26:27,440
but it's also like now it's like a testament to like, all right, just keep fucking doing it, man.

1001
01:26:27,440 --> 01:26:30,960
And if, if someone's going to rip you off and do it better than you, then you didn't deserve it in

1002
01:26:30,960 --> 01:26:36,160
the first place, I feel like. Yeah. So I'm excited to see what the rebrand looks like. I'm assuming

1003
01:26:36,160 --> 01:26:44,960
you're keeping your men as your main guy. Not actually. Yeah. Oh, no. Oh, yeah. Okay. So

1004
01:26:45,600 --> 01:26:49,600
yeah, that's kind of, I guess that's the bottom of this podcast. Yeah. So I'm actually

1005
01:26:50,240 --> 01:26:55,520
moving a little point. Yeah. Yeah. If you made it all the way here to my crazy ramblings.

1006
01:26:56,560 --> 01:27:01,760
Yeah. So I think the big thing is like moving away from just doing your men all the time has

1007
01:27:01,760 --> 01:27:07,680
been super freeing. And also like I'm moving more into more of a general look for some stuff of like,

1008
01:27:08,640 --> 01:27:12,560
like we already talked about this. It's hard to sell a brand built off of one IP.

1009
01:27:12,560 --> 01:27:18,640
So I need to start differentiating this with more characters and also like a trademark look that is

1010
01:27:20,000 --> 01:27:25,440
familiar enough, but also uniquely mine. Yeah. And that's what I've been exploring lately. And

1011
01:27:25,440 --> 01:27:29,760
it's been really cool and freeing. If you go to the website, depressed monsters.com, you can kind

1012
01:27:29,760 --> 01:27:34,560
of see a preview of it. That's just a placeholder, but it's kind of where we're moving and all that

1013
01:27:34,560 --> 01:27:38,080
stuff. And yeah, it's been kind of cool. Like, you're men will always be the main character,

1014
01:27:38,080 --> 01:27:43,120
but it's like, I'm just tired of using the same year men. Like this has been, I don't, there's

1015
01:27:43,120 --> 01:27:46,960
not video on this podcast, but like, if you know my brand at all, you know, like the trademark

1016
01:27:46,960 --> 01:27:50,880
year men, like this is the one that everybody knows. And it's, you know, it's the look and feel

1017
01:27:50,880 --> 01:27:54,720
of the brand, but it's been like that for 10 years. It's time to kind of like, that is still

1018
01:27:54,720 --> 01:27:58,400
the look of the brand, but now it's time to like make it into something a little bit different.

1019
01:27:58,400 --> 01:28:04,240
Oh, that's so crazy. To think that this is, it's going to shift a little bit, but

1020
01:28:04,960 --> 01:28:09,680
I'm excited to see what's coming because you've got that passion. It's, I know that's the hard

1021
01:28:09,680 --> 01:28:14,960
part about this podcast. It doesn't have video. And I just refuse to put video up no matter what,

1022
01:28:14,960 --> 01:28:21,040
but the cool thing about it is I get to now say like, no, no, I can see the passion and the glow

1023
01:28:21,040 --> 01:28:26,400
and the like blow up that's happening on screen right now about how excited you are for what's

1024
01:28:26,400 --> 01:28:31,360
next. That's, that's a very sweet couple. You're a very, very nice person. Thank you. That's very

1025
01:28:31,360 --> 01:28:40,240
sweet. So I had two little glimpses from all the things that you've talked about today that I

1026
01:28:40,240 --> 01:28:46,880
wanted to share. One, when I was in high school, Obey wasn't huge. He was still in his wall art

1027
01:28:46,880 --> 01:28:55,120
phase and what's shepherd fairy? Is that his name? Yep. He hung. So I grew up in Fresno,

1028
01:28:55,120 --> 01:29:02,640
California, small podunk town. There was an Obey, Obey piece that he put up. I guess he was going

1029
01:29:02,640 --> 01:29:09,040
through and it was on the side of like this weird, I don't know if it was like a, like a small building

1030
01:29:09,040 --> 01:29:15,280
or like a giant electrical thing, whatever, but it was there and then, but no one, he wasn't huge

1031
01:29:15,280 --> 01:29:21,680
in Fresno and it got taken down, which is so crazy. Huge in Fresno is a great brand name if

1032
01:29:21,680 --> 01:29:29,680
anybody wants to steal that. There you go. Huge in Fresno. Yeah, exactly. Excuse me. That's crazy,

1033
01:29:29,680 --> 01:29:35,760
dude. Yeah. And we, like I've gone back several times. There's not even remnants of it. And I,

1034
01:29:35,760 --> 01:29:40,400
like everything in me is like someone probably figured out how to get it off the wall and took

1035
01:29:40,400 --> 01:29:47,520
it or some destructive hick of a person that like lives in Fresno was like, this can't be here. And

1036
01:29:47,520 --> 01:29:52,480
like, yeah, ripped it off. It's crazy. Cause if you, if you go on eBay, sometimes you'll see people

1037
01:29:53,200 --> 01:29:57,440
list like ones that have taken off the walls and stuff. And they're kind of cool to see. I remember

1038
01:29:57,440 --> 01:30:04,240
when I was working downtown in Vegas in like 2012, 2013 timeframe, he came through on just one of his

1039
01:30:04,240 --> 01:30:08,640
tours or whatever. And he put, he got up on this crazy spot that was on the side of a building

1040
01:30:08,640 --> 01:30:12,960
and nobody touched it. It was there for years until the sun destroyed it. And it was like a,

1041
01:30:12,960 --> 01:30:17,760
it was like a statement piece. And I was like, fuck man, that's so cool. And then now years later,

1042
01:30:17,760 --> 01:30:23,840
I think in like 2018, 2019, he was invited to do like a huge piece on the side of his place called

1043
01:30:23,840 --> 01:30:29,680
emergency arts. And it's like, now it's just like, it's cool to see the respect given to him

1044
01:30:29,680 --> 01:30:32,880
because he deserves it. I mean, the dude is just a monster when it comes to this game.

1045
01:30:33,440 --> 01:30:38,720
It's cool seeing artists do that, like Invader. Yeah, I love Invader. Yeah. It has

1046
01:30:38,720 --> 01:30:46,800
a couple pieces in San Diego, but you don't know where like he has that app where you can like find

1047
01:30:46,800 --> 01:30:52,320
all the different ones. There's some stuff that goes along with it, but I don't have the app. So

1048
01:30:52,320 --> 01:30:57,520
I only see them if I'm just randomly looking up. And so to see that on the wall and be like, oh,

1049
01:30:57,520 --> 01:31:01,760
that's cool. And then not tell anyone about it is my favorite thing. Like that's just me.

1050
01:31:01,760 --> 01:31:06,080
Yeah, that's cool. I know. And he's like, I know his stuff goes for like millions on

1051
01:31:06,080 --> 01:31:12,000
auction blocks and stuff. And it's just there in public. It's so cool. Number two, Tony Shea,

1052
01:31:12,000 --> 01:31:22,880
and it's cool to hear how close you were with him. His book has forever changed how I do everything,

1053
01:31:22,880 --> 01:31:30,480
delivering happiness. It has forever changed how I care for people forever changed how my job

1054
01:31:30,480 --> 01:31:39,040
functions as I look to like what people need, how I can serve them and just like how I serve my own

1055
01:31:39,040 --> 01:31:46,400
soul and even parts of how I correct certain people when they are like, Hey, what do you think

1056
01:31:46,400 --> 01:31:51,600
about this? It's like one of his things is like never outsource your core competency. So like if

1057
01:31:51,600 --> 01:31:57,040
you're really good at doing this thing, like stop trying to get other people to do it because

1058
01:31:57,040 --> 01:32:03,520
you're too lazy, like do that. Yep. And you really do know his stuff. That's awesome. Yeah. And so

1059
01:32:03,520 --> 01:32:10,240
it's cool. Like full circle, like we read it in like 2016. And so full circle did I have you on

1060
01:32:10,240 --> 01:32:16,240
in 2023 where it's like someone that knew him firsthand and then being able to say like, Oh,

1061
01:32:16,240 --> 01:32:21,440
this guy forever changed me. So it's, it's cool. I think, and I think he's become a part of my

1062
01:32:21,440 --> 01:32:27,040
story with the brand now too, which is, which is wild. I never, I just always thought he'd be here.

1063
01:32:27,040 --> 01:32:32,000
You know, I think that's like the, like I'm trying not to cry right now, but like, it's sad. Like

1064
01:32:32,000 --> 01:32:36,000
you just always think that a person of like that caliber is just always going to be there in your

1065
01:32:36,000 --> 01:32:40,880
corner. Yeah. You know, and then he, you know, what happened to him is so tragic and it could

1066
01:32:40,880 --> 01:32:48,000
happen to any of us. And you know, it sucks to like read hit pieces about him now, you know,

1067
01:32:48,000 --> 01:32:53,280
and you're like, dude, that was like, you have no idea. And like, I've been, you know, I shared a video

1068
01:32:53,280 --> 01:32:57,040
around the time that happened of just sharing my experiences and be like, I'll miss you forever,

1069
01:32:57,040 --> 01:33:02,000
buddy, like whatever. And like, all of a sudden to get hit, hit up by like reporters looking for

1070
01:33:02,000 --> 01:33:08,880
like an exclusive, like, fuck you, like, no, this is, this is not a story that is that we want to

1071
01:33:08,880 --> 01:33:13,440
tell. And it was interesting to see like, like I got a lot of flack for sharing my story because

1072
01:33:13,440 --> 01:33:22,800
I think the thing about Tony is that like, he was such a powerful beam of light that people

1073
01:33:22,800 --> 01:33:28,320
wanted to contain it. And people wanted to bottle it up and keep it for themselves. And you saw that

1074
01:33:28,320 --> 01:33:31,760
in this afterlife too, because like, I didn't know this, but I guess there was a ton of people

1075
01:33:31,760 --> 01:33:35,280
that were mad at me because I shared my story, like, you weren't friends with them, you didn't do,

1076
01:33:35,280 --> 01:33:40,240
I go, I just shared my personal experiences with them. I never said anything other than like,

1077
01:33:40,240 --> 01:33:45,840
this is what we had, like, and I think that's okay to do, right? But it is just funny how like,

1078
01:33:46,400 --> 01:33:51,440
death can bring out the worst in people sometimes. And it's, it's, it's so sad because all that man

1079
01:33:51,440 --> 01:33:56,640
wanted was for people to be happy and loved and find their tribe. That was his big, he was a burning

1080
01:33:56,640 --> 01:34:02,480
man guy, you know, like, he just loved people. He just loved people. And if you read his book,

1081
01:34:02,480 --> 01:34:06,480
you read his book, you read about like the Vegas tech stuff, like I was there for all of that stuff,

1082
01:34:06,480 --> 01:34:12,240
like fringe, you know, for a lot of it, but I was also there. And like, just to see like,

1083
01:34:12,880 --> 01:34:17,520
inviting entrepreneurs out and to, you know, come out and, hey, if you have an idea, I want to,

1084
01:34:17,520 --> 01:34:21,760
I want to put money behind it. And he was just childlike. And that's what I loved about him.

1085
01:34:21,760 --> 01:34:25,360
Is it like, that's what I try to retain in my own work is like, keep the childlike wonder.

1086
01:34:25,920 --> 01:34:31,600
And I feel like the rest will follow, essentially. And I just learned so many lessons from him.

1087
01:34:31,600 --> 01:34:36,880
And just even the smallest things that he did and like, I don't know, like he just, he just really

1088
01:34:36,880 --> 01:34:41,600
was a special, special human being. And him and my grandpa were so similar in that sense that like,

1089
01:34:41,600 --> 01:34:46,080
they both just wanted people to be loved and happy. And I've always really affiliated myself

1090
01:34:46,080 --> 01:34:50,320
with that. I use humor as a way to like bridge the gap with people and stuff. And obviously,

1091
01:34:50,320 --> 01:34:54,960
I haven't been funny on this podcast, because this is more of a serious conversation. But like,

1092
01:34:54,960 --> 01:35:03,120
I think that like, for a lot of us, like Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Tony, my grandpa,

1093
01:35:03,120 --> 01:35:08,480
whoever, a lot of us use that to make people feel accepted and loved when really we might be hurting

1094
01:35:08,480 --> 01:35:13,200
on the inside too. And then it's not until afterwards you go, Oh, I didn't know, I didn't

1095
01:35:13,200 --> 01:35:17,120
know they were experiencing that things, you know, and it's like, just, you know, if you have someone

1096
01:35:17,760 --> 01:35:22,320
in your life that maybe is doing that, maybe tell them you love them, you know, maybe just tell them

1097
01:35:22,320 --> 01:35:26,880
how much they mean to you, or maybe just tell them that they're, they're good how they are. Because,

1098
01:35:26,880 --> 01:35:31,200
you know, sometimes I wish I was told that and I think all of us do. And it's an important thing

1099
01:35:31,200 --> 01:35:39,360
to do. Yeah, the hard part is people that are connectors like that or loving or are just like

1100
01:35:39,360 --> 01:35:46,160
walking beams of light. Yeah, they help you forget the fragility of life. So you think that like,

1101
01:35:46,160 --> 01:35:52,320
man, they're going to be here forever. And then with the fragility of life gets them. It's like,

1102
01:35:52,320 --> 01:36:00,720
man, that was unfair. Like that is unreal. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, you know, I went through so much

1103
01:36:01,600 --> 01:36:04,960
strife with this and dealing with this, where I was like, why him, why not me? You know what I

1104
01:36:04,960 --> 01:36:09,840
mean? Like, just shit like that, because he just had so much to give. He had so much more to give

1105
01:36:09,840 --> 01:36:16,240
the world. And it sucks that that was robbed from not only him, but us, because he was just getting

1106
01:36:16,240 --> 01:36:22,000
started, man, like he was ready to he was ready to go off from Zappos and start doing other work

1107
01:36:22,000 --> 01:36:28,080
in the world. And, you know, you're exactly right, the fragility of life affected him in a way that

1108
01:36:28,080 --> 01:36:33,200
doesn't affect some other people. And life's hard, man, like, I don't look down on anybody with

1109
01:36:33,200 --> 01:36:38,880
addiction issues, I don't look down on anybody for nothing, man, like addiction happens, drug

1110
01:36:38,880 --> 01:36:43,920
addiction happens, emotional addiction happens, all these things happen. And I just come out of

1111
01:36:43,920 --> 01:36:48,800
from a place of, I'm sorry, you're like, it's it's hard to get through life, you know, it really is.

1112
01:36:48,800 --> 01:36:54,000
And I miss that dude a lot. And it's nice to have conversations like this to just like,

1113
01:36:54,000 --> 01:36:58,560
you know, remind myself about them, but also like even at Comic Con, I was talking to somebody,

1114
01:36:58,560 --> 01:37:02,480
because I didn't know anybody at these events that I went to, I just had to put on my cap and go,

1115
01:37:02,480 --> 01:37:07,280
I'm going to make friends, I just have to at this point. And I was at this, the fandom party,

1116
01:37:07,280 --> 01:37:12,880
which is like, it's like the big party of Comic Con or whatever, I got lucky enough to go to.

1117
01:37:12,880 --> 01:37:16,640
And I saw a guy dressed as the Mad Hatter, and I was like, that's my guy. And so I went over

1118
01:37:16,640 --> 01:37:20,640
and I was like, Hey, man, like, good, you know, whatever. Turns out he worked for the Con, but

1119
01:37:20,640 --> 01:37:25,440
also turns out his wife used to work for a company that was heavily inspired by Zappos, and she

1120
01:37:25,440 --> 01:37:30,640
almost worked at Zappos. And so we just started talking, she loved Tony, like the same, all this

1121
01:37:30,640 --> 01:37:38,160
stuff. And we actually took a Furnet shot in honor of Tony at Comic Con, because his legacy lives on.

1122
01:37:38,160 --> 01:37:42,720
And to me, again, like I've said this before in the podcast already, but like, I'm a big

1123
01:37:42,720 --> 01:37:48,480
believer in the universe shows you a path. And that was Tony speaking to me from beyond like these,

1124
01:37:48,480 --> 01:37:53,280
he his big phrase for us was serendipitous collisions. That's what he truly believed.

1125
01:37:53,280 --> 01:37:59,120
And he designed the Zappos building in a way that you can only enter from like two or three areas.

1126
01:37:59,120 --> 01:38:03,360
So that way you were forced to walk in with people and have conversations and make new friends.

1127
01:38:03,920 --> 01:38:11,040
He was just a, he was just a beautiful person. He was just a, he was always thinking about

1128
01:38:11,040 --> 01:38:15,760
how can I make people more comfortable? How can I make people feel, you know, alive and happy?

1129
01:38:15,760 --> 01:38:20,640
And even things like that, you know, like, who thinks of that? Who thinks to buy an old city

1130
01:38:20,640 --> 01:38:25,760
hall and close off all the entrances? So you have to enter from two areas to make new friends.

1131
01:38:25,760 --> 01:38:31,200
It's insane. It's just beautiful. And I try to carry that on in my work. Whenever I have to do

1132
01:38:31,200 --> 01:38:35,920
customer service side of things, I always try to make sure that I think of Zappos. And I always

1133
01:38:35,920 --> 01:38:40,560
put so many freebies. And if you order from my brand, I always put so much free stuff in there

1134
01:38:40,560 --> 01:38:46,320
just because you're, you're, you know, supporting me, how can I support you as my, is my big mantra

1135
01:38:46,320 --> 01:38:51,120
with this brand? And, you know, I just don't want that to ever be lost. Like I, I, I, like I said,

1136
01:38:51,120 --> 01:38:54,960
I didn't go to art school, but I fucking went to business school, man. And that was Zappos.com.

1137
01:38:54,960 --> 01:38:59,600
Dude, like, and I got lucky that my professor was one of the best to ever do it.

1138
01:38:59,600 --> 01:39:06,480
Yeah. So incredible. Dude, I thank you so much for coming on toys on tap today.

1139
01:39:06,480 --> 01:39:09,280
Yeah, thanks for having me. Yeah, it's been great.

1140
01:39:09,280 --> 01:39:15,120
The last part of the podcast I like to split. And it's just the last piece that I love to

1141
01:39:15,120 --> 01:39:20,160
give the artist where you get to plug everything that's coming up, how people can get in contact

1142
01:39:20,160 --> 01:39:25,360
with you, where we can buy your stuff, all that stuff. So, okay. Will you make me a promise?

1143
01:39:26,880 --> 01:39:32,480
Oh, yeah, I guess so. Okay. If I announce something on this show, I, you need to promise me that you

1144
01:39:32,480 --> 01:39:37,600
won't just slice that part and put it up. Like if people, I want people to just find this part

1145
01:39:37,600 --> 01:39:42,720
if they listen to the whole thing. Oh, deal. I don't slice any of my episodes up for that reason.

1146
01:39:42,720 --> 01:39:47,680
Yeah, cool. Because this has been something I've been nervous to announce. Okay. First of all,

1147
01:39:47,680 --> 01:39:52,400
you can find me at depressed monsters, pretty much all social platforms. Instagram is the main one

1148
01:39:52,400 --> 01:39:58,720
for me. Probably start making a TikTok push next year. Because fuck TikTok, but unfortunately,

1149
01:39:58,720 --> 01:40:04,960
we have to be there. And so you can find me at all that stuff. You depressed monsters.com,

1150
01:40:04,960 --> 01:40:10,480
if you want to buy stuff, I do a weekly live stream shopping experience. So it's every Thursday

1151
01:40:10,480 --> 01:40:15,360
at 7pm Pacific Standard Time, where you can just come hang out with me. We do a lot of fun stuff.

1152
01:40:15,360 --> 01:40:20,480
Like behind me, I have a vintage mood analyzer. So on the stream, I will analyze your mood.

1153
01:40:21,120 --> 01:40:26,160
It's really fun. Like it's really fun. I try to make them goofy and like an experience. You know,

1154
01:40:26,160 --> 01:40:30,240
because you're spending a couple hours with me, like the least I can do is make it fun for you.

1155
01:40:30,240 --> 01:40:34,480
And I'm super inspired by Peewee's Playhouse. And I always have been. And so like I try to make it

1156
01:40:34,480 --> 01:40:39,760
like that's why I have this backdrop with like a giant pretzel and the big stuff like that. Like,

1157
01:40:39,760 --> 01:40:43,120
I just want it to be fun for people. So the big announcement, I guess, is that

1158
01:40:43,120 --> 01:40:50,560
that during the pandemic, I was, you know, feeling lost. I was feeling lonely. And I had an opportunity

1159
01:40:50,560 --> 01:40:55,520
to submit for a reality show. And I was like, Oh, this will never happen. Like whatever,

1160
01:40:55,520 --> 01:40:59,360
it's like a goofy dating show. I was like, I just want to get out of the house. Turns out I got

1161
01:40:59,360 --> 01:41:06,160
picked and I filmed for two months in Vancouver. And it's like, it's just like this super frigging

1162
01:41:06,160 --> 01:41:10,960
goofy, like dating show or whatever. But I look at everything that I do is performance art. So

1163
01:41:10,960 --> 01:41:15,600
it's almost like a performance art piece for me. It was never supposed to be released ever. But

1164
01:41:15,600 --> 01:41:22,000
because the writer strike, they're releasing all these shows. And so it's coming out next week,

1165
01:41:22,000 --> 01:41:28,560
August 15th on MTV. If you go on MTV, the commercials coming up every like 20 minutes. And

1166
01:41:28,560 --> 01:41:34,320
I'm in the promo looking, I am in the promo saying I'm done and walking off. So I guess I'm

1167
01:41:34,320 --> 01:41:39,280
going to be the drama of the show. But the exciting part for me is that I got to wear my

1168
01:41:39,280 --> 01:41:43,360
depressed monsters hoodie on like some key parts of the show. So I'm hoping that people discover

1169
01:41:43,360 --> 01:41:46,800
the brand that way. And it's not like over, it's not beating it over your head. It's just like,

1170
01:41:46,800 --> 01:41:52,160
Hey, if you, if you like me and you want to see the brand, like there it is. And so yeah, it just,

1171
01:41:52,160 --> 01:41:56,800
it was born out of basically necessity to survive and do something different. And like I said,

1172
01:41:56,800 --> 01:42:00,160
I treat everything in my life as performance art and everything is art. And so this is now a

1173
01:42:00,160 --> 01:42:03,840
performance art piece that I did two years ago that just happens to be on MTV now.

1174
01:42:03,840 --> 01:42:11,600
I'm not splicing shit. So basically, if you got made it to the end of the show, I hope that like,

1175
01:42:11,600 --> 01:42:16,080
you know, tune in or if you want, it's going to be, it's definitely different than anything I've

1176
01:42:16,080 --> 01:42:22,720
done in the past. Awesome. Dude, I cannot wait. This comes out on Monday. So it's like the perfect

1177
01:42:23,280 --> 01:42:27,920
yes. And then that comes out on Tuesday. So yeah, it's a perfect timing for it. Perfect. Perfect.

1178
01:42:27,920 --> 01:42:31,520
Dude, thank you. And I'll post, I'll post like, Hey, like made a big announcement in this one,

1179
01:42:31,520 --> 01:42:38,000
but you got to make it to the end to hear it or whatever. I need to release it, dude. Like,

1180
01:42:38,000 --> 01:42:42,800
I haven't released anything on social about it because I'm scared because obviously that changes

1181
01:42:42,800 --> 01:42:50,080
how people like perceive me, right? Like now it's a different thing. And I love this time

1182
01:42:50,080 --> 01:42:54,400
where it's like, I know something and you don't. And like, I don't want to be perceived as like

1183
01:42:55,280 --> 01:42:59,200
whatever, you know, I just want to be perceived as an artist. And it does change that a little bit.

1184
01:42:59,200 --> 01:43:02,880
But I think I can do a good job of being like, this is a performance art piece. Like I did this

1185
01:43:02,880 --> 01:43:07,120
out of necessity, blah, blah, blah. So we'll see what happens. I don't know. It's just so funny.

1186
01:43:07,120 --> 01:43:12,880
I think that's the selling point. If it becomes actually who you are and who you become is this

1187
01:43:12,880 --> 01:43:18,160
like role you played. Man, depressed monsters is going to take a weird turn in the future.

1188
01:43:18,160 --> 01:43:23,600
It's going to take a weird turn, bro. I know. I know. Oh my God. But I'm ready. You know,

1189
01:43:23,600 --> 01:43:29,360
like I said, the universe provides whatever I'm just on the path, man, like I have no, I don't

1190
01:43:29,360 --> 01:43:34,160
know where anything's heading. I'm just here. I'm just here enjoying the ride. So every day that I

1191
01:43:34,160 --> 01:43:40,000
get to wake up and my bills are paid, that's that's a blessing. And if I can help someone along the

1192
01:43:40,000 --> 01:43:45,840
way, then that's cool too. Long live Tony Shea. Long live Tony Shea. And I can tell you on this

1193
01:43:45,840 --> 01:43:50,880
side of it, we are blessed because you are here, live in life. So thank you, bro. That's dude,

1194
01:43:50,880 --> 01:43:53,680
you are. I want to do another one of these pockets just to talk to you. You are like the

1195
01:43:53,680 --> 01:44:00,400
nicest person on the planet. Hey, I'm always game. I'm always game for that. I love doing this.

1196
01:44:00,400 --> 01:44:04,400
I'm always game. We'll bring you back on after you do full rebrand and everything.

1197
01:44:05,200 --> 01:44:09,600
Yeah, we'll come back on sounds good. And then you're always welcome on that Twitch stream that

1198
01:44:09,600 --> 01:44:14,160
I do with with the dudes. I'm not usually on it anymore, but Josh loved to interview you. I'm

1199
01:44:14,160 --> 01:44:21,760
sure we you know, I think I might have sent them a message about it. Not that long, maybe a year

1200
01:44:21,760 --> 01:44:28,080
ago, maybe it has been a long time. But it's hard to figure out how you collab on things,

1201
01:44:28,080 --> 01:44:33,440
especially stuff like that. I agree. Yeah, it's easy now because you just let me know if you want

1202
01:44:33,440 --> 01:44:36,640
to do it and I'll send a text message to it. And you can be on it this week if you want.

1203
01:44:37,680 --> 01:44:41,840
Let me think about it because I think that's yeah. Yeah, why not dude? It's fun. Like they're

1204
01:44:41,840 --> 01:44:48,000
easy to talk to again. I kind of quit. I kind of quit doing it just because of my own, you know,

1205
01:44:48,000 --> 01:44:52,000
burnout and mental health stuff, but they're still doing it and I'm sure they'd love to have you.

1206
01:44:52,000 --> 01:44:54,400
Dude, thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you again for coming on.

1207
01:44:55,120 --> 01:44:58,880
Yeah, dude. Thank you so much, man. This has honestly been, I would say the most

1208
01:44:59,600 --> 01:45:04,720
freeing podcast I've ever done just because you have really good energy to you and positivity. And

1209
01:45:04,720 --> 01:45:09,280
you can always tell when someone's a good person and I appreciate the nice things you say. It really

1210
01:45:09,280 --> 01:45:19,280
meant a lot to me. So thank you.

1211
01:45:39,280 --> 01:45:49,280
Thank you.