WEBVTT 00:00:00.699 --> 00:00:03.879 You are stronger than you think. And I don't 00:00:03.879 --> 00:00:07.099 say that as a feel -good phrase. I say it because 00:00:07.099 --> 00:00:09.800 I see it every single day in the homes of seniors 00:00:09.800 --> 00:00:13.119 and family caregivers. In today's episode, I'm 00:00:13.119 --> 00:00:15.160 going to help you recognize the strength you 00:00:15.160 --> 00:00:17.679 already have, especially when aging in place 00:00:17.679 --> 00:00:20.820 feels overwhelming, exhausting, or uncertain. 00:00:21.519 --> 00:00:24.019 You'll walk away with simple ways to see your 00:00:24.019 --> 00:00:26.899 progress, not just your problems. And if you're 00:00:26.899 --> 00:00:29.940 new here, I'm Robin Schiltz, a Senior Home Safety 00:00:29.940 --> 00:00:32.960 Specialist. I've spent years helping older adults 00:00:32.960 --> 00:00:35.899 stay safe and independent at home, and I've seen 00:00:35.899 --> 00:00:38.880 firsthand how much quiet strength people actually 00:00:38.880 --> 00:00:42.780 carry. Many of the seniors and caregivers I work 00:00:42.780 --> 00:00:46.039 with don't feel strong. They feel stretched and 00:00:46.039 --> 00:00:49.479 tired and like they're barely keeping up. Maybe 00:00:49.479 --> 00:00:52.159 that's you. Maybe you're caring for a spouse 00:00:52.159 --> 00:00:55.079 with memory loss, or helping with a parent who's 00:00:55.079 --> 00:00:58.200 losing balance, or maybe you are the older adult 00:00:58.200 --> 00:01:00.780 trying to adapt to changes in your own body. 00:01:01.619 --> 00:01:04.140 Some days it just feels like too much, doesn't 00:01:04.140 --> 00:01:08.260 it? But here is what I want you to hear me say 00:01:08.260 --> 00:01:12.159 clearly. Strength does not always look like confidence, 00:01:12.439 --> 00:01:15.400 and it doesn't always look like energy, and strength 00:01:15.400 --> 00:01:18.659 does not always look like optimism. Sometimes 00:01:18.659 --> 00:01:21.599 strength looks like just getting up anyway, or 00:01:21.599 --> 00:01:24.120 it looks like just making one more phone call. 00:01:24.680 --> 00:01:27.140 Sometimes strength looks like installing one 00:01:27.140 --> 00:01:29.939 grab bar even when you wish you didn't need it. 00:01:30.459 --> 00:01:33.019 I've walked into homes where people apologize 00:01:33.019 --> 00:01:36.000 to me and say, I should have handled this sooner, 00:01:36.299 --> 00:01:39.340 or I feel like a failure. But when I look around, 00:01:39.480 --> 00:01:42.439 I see something very different. I see someone 00:01:42.439 --> 00:01:46.120 who is adjusting. who is trying, and who is learning 00:01:46.120 --> 00:01:50.099 new skills at age 70, 80, or even 90 years old. 00:01:50.439 --> 00:01:53.799 Let me tell you, that is strength. Let's talk 00:01:53.799 --> 00:01:56.400 about why it's so hard to see our own strength. 00:01:57.340 --> 00:02:00.400 First, we compare ourselves to who we used to 00:02:00.400 --> 00:02:03.659 be. You may be thinking something like, well, 00:02:03.659 --> 00:02:06.299 I used to climb ladders and lift heavy boxes. 00:02:06.480 --> 00:02:09.879 I used to be able to drive at night. Well, and 00:02:09.879 --> 00:02:13.469 now you can't. So you assume you're weaker. But 00:02:13.469 --> 00:02:17.030 strength changes shape over time. At 30, strength 00:02:17.030 --> 00:02:20.770 might be physical. At 75, strength might be wisdom. 00:02:21.250 --> 00:02:25.229 At 85, strength might be patience. At any age, 00:02:25.689 --> 00:02:28.009 strength can be the courage to ask for help as 00:02:28.009 --> 00:02:31.250 well. That takes more bravery than most people 00:02:31.250 --> 00:02:35.530 realize. Second, we tend to focus on what is 00:02:35.530 --> 00:02:38.810 going wrong, not what's going right. When someone 00:02:38.810 --> 00:02:42.030 falls, that one moment can erase months of success 00:02:42.030 --> 00:02:44.830 in your mind. Or when you forget an appointment, 00:02:45.030 --> 00:02:46.930 you might ignore the hundred other things you 00:02:46.930 --> 00:02:50.150 actually remembered. Our brains are wired to 00:02:50.150 --> 00:02:53.270 notice danger. That's normal, but it can hide 00:02:53.270 --> 00:02:56.849 your progress from you. So here's something simple 00:02:56.849 --> 00:03:00.210 I encourage people to do. Start tracking what 00:03:00.210 --> 00:03:03.469 is working. Did you use your walker consistently 00:03:03.469 --> 00:03:06.629 this week? Did you speak up at a doctor's appointment? 00:03:06.889 --> 00:03:09.330 Did you finally move that throw rug that kept 00:03:09.330 --> 00:03:12.789 sliding? Well, that is not small. That is strength 00:03:12.789 --> 00:03:16.009 in action. And caregivers, I want to speak to 00:03:16.009 --> 00:03:19.189 you for a moment. You're carrying way more than 00:03:19.189 --> 00:03:22.389 you let on. You're managing medications. You're 00:03:22.389 --> 00:03:26.430 monitoring safety. You answer the same questions 00:03:26.430 --> 00:03:30.009 over and over. Calm down fears that are not even 00:03:30.009 --> 00:03:33.349 your own. And most of the time, no one applauds 00:03:33.349 --> 00:03:38.270 that. But I see it, and it matters. Strength 00:03:38.270 --> 00:03:41.349 is not just about doing more. It's also about 00:03:41.349 --> 00:03:44.349 setting limits. Sometimes strength means saying, 00:03:44.629 --> 00:03:47.689 I need help. It might mean bringing in a home 00:03:47.689 --> 00:03:50.349 care aide for a few hours or installing better 00:03:50.349 --> 00:03:52.870 lighting in the hallway. It might mean admitting 00:03:52.870 --> 00:03:55.789 that something has changed. That is not giving 00:03:55.789 --> 00:03:59.750 up. That is adapting. And adaptation is one of 00:03:59.750 --> 00:04:03.039 the greatest forms of strength. In my work, I 00:04:03.039 --> 00:04:06.120 often tell families, the goal is not perfection. 00:04:06.439 --> 00:04:10.300 The goal is progress. The goal is a safer bathroom, 00:04:10.639 --> 00:04:13.860 a phone placed within reach, a clearer path from 00:04:13.860 --> 00:04:16.959 the bed to the bathroom. These are small steps, 00:04:17.079 --> 00:04:20.899 but those small steps add up. Think about this. 00:04:21.300 --> 00:04:24.040 You're navigating aging in place in a world that 00:04:24.040 --> 00:04:28.250 moves fast. Technology changes overnight. Healthcare 00:04:28.250 --> 00:04:31.910 systems change, insurance rules change, and you 00:04:31.910 --> 00:04:35.009 are still here, still learning, and still trying. 00:04:35.649 --> 00:04:39.350 That tells me something important. You are resilient. 00:04:40.310 --> 00:04:43.370 Resilience is not loud, but it is steady and 00:04:43.370 --> 00:04:46.550 quiet, and it shows up in daily routines. It 00:04:46.550 --> 00:04:49.370 shows up in the decision to try again tomorrow. 00:04:50.209 --> 00:04:52.550 So how do you start believing that you're stronger 00:04:52.550 --> 00:04:55.269 than you think? There are three simple things 00:04:55.269 --> 00:04:59.769 you can do. First, Pause and look back. Where 00:04:59.769 --> 00:05:03.550 were you one year ago? What has improved? Even 00:05:03.550 --> 00:05:07.250 one improvement counts. Second, ask someone you 00:05:07.250 --> 00:05:10.009 trust what they see in you. You might be very 00:05:10.009 --> 00:05:13.509 surprised. Often others see our strength long 00:05:13.509 --> 00:05:17.370 before we do. Third, give yourself credit for 00:05:17.370 --> 00:05:21.129 effort. Not just results. Effort. It matters. 00:05:21.470 --> 00:05:24.529 Especially in this season of life. I've worked 00:05:24.529 --> 00:05:26.850 with people who rebuilt their confidence after 00:05:26.850 --> 00:05:29.370 a fall, and I've worked with caregivers who learned 00:05:29.370 --> 00:05:33.350 to manage complex care routines. I've seen couples 00:05:33.350 --> 00:05:36.269 adjust to using walkers and hearing aids and 00:05:36.269 --> 00:05:39.009 stair lifts and still laugh together in the kitchen. 00:05:39.709 --> 00:05:43.430 That is strength. Everyday strength. Not just 00:05:43.430 --> 00:05:45.610 because everything is easy to them, but because 00:05:45.610 --> 00:05:48.850 they just keep going. If today feels heavy, I 00:05:48.850 --> 00:05:51.730 want you to remember this. You do not need to 00:05:51.730 --> 00:05:54.589 solve everything at once. You only need to take 00:05:54.589 --> 00:05:58.750 the next safe step. Move one obstacle. Make one 00:05:58.750 --> 00:06:02.310 appointment. Have one honest conversation. That 00:06:02.310 --> 00:06:05.110 is enough for today. And when you look at yourself 00:06:05.110 --> 00:06:07.750 in the mirror tonight, I hope you don't see only 00:06:07.750 --> 00:06:10.829 the fatigue you probably feel. I hope you also 00:06:10.829 --> 00:06:14.529 see the courage, because it is there. You are 00:06:14.529 --> 00:06:18.009 stronger than you think. So thanks for joining 00:06:18.009 --> 00:06:20.740 me today. Please share this episode with someone 00:06:20.740 --> 00:06:23.000 you care about who could use the information 00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:26.500 to make their life safer. You'll find more resources 00:06:26.500 --> 00:06:29.160 for seniors and caregivers on our website at 00:06:29.160 --> 00:06:32.339 seniorsafetyadvice .com. And if you're searching 00:06:32.339 --> 00:06:35.019 for an Aging in Place specialist, please visit 00:06:35.019 --> 00:06:38.759 our sister website at aginginplacedirectory .com. 00:06:39.399 --> 00:06:41.959 Also, if you haven't subscribed to our YouTube 00:06:41.959 --> 00:06:44.920 channel or to this podcast yet, go ahead and 00:06:44.920 --> 00:06:47.569 do that right now. and then come back tomorrow 00:06:47.569 --> 00:06:50.550 for another Daily Moment of guidance and encouragement 00:06:50.550 --> 00:06:53.910 right here on the Senior Safety Advice Podcast. 00:06:54.529 --> 00:06:57.970 Until next time, thanks for listening. Take care. 00:06:58.490 --> 00:06:58.870 Bye!