1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:07,400 Recovery Radio 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:07,400 KMP3,000. 3 00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:27,880 Ah, 4 00:00:24,880 --> 00:00:27,880 yes. 5 00:00:29,599 --> 00:00:38,320 You are listening to 6 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:41,800 the recovery radio podcast 7 00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:41,800 on KMP3. 8 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:54,200 I am a member of Alcoholics Anonymous 9 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:54,200 and I will be your host. 10 00:00:56,640 --> 00:01:01,399 You can email me at 11 00:00:58,399 --> 00:01:01,399 sarcasticbiningbook@gmail. 12 00:01:03,039 --> 00:01:06,400 You can follow me on Instagram at 13 00:01:04,559 --> 00:01:09,400 sarcastic. 14 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:09,400 Aa.book. 15 00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:16,720 As always, so glad you're here with me. 16 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:18,720 I don't know if your day is just getting 17 00:01:16,720 --> 00:01:21,360 started or it's just winding down or 18 00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:23,920 it's somewhere right smack dab in the 19 00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:26,479 middle, but here we are. 20 00:01:23,920 --> 00:01:32,200 together. 21 00:01:26,479 --> 00:01:32,200 You and me. And I am grateful for it. 22 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:38,200 Grateful. I have no desire to drink 23 00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:38,200 today. 24 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:42,119 That is a miracle. 25 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:49,880 I can't tell you how many times I 26 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:49,880 remember 27 00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:54,280 dying 28 00:01:54,720 --> 00:02:00,560 to have my next dream. Just dying. 29 00:01:57,759 --> 00:02:03,960 Just dying inside. Just 30 00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:03,960 needing it. 31 00:02:04,079 --> 00:02:09,880 Always needing to know where the next 32 00:02:05,759 --> 00:02:09,880 one is going to come from. 33 00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:14,560 making it very clear to everyone in my 34 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:16,400 life if I did not have a drink there was 35 00:02:14,560 --> 00:02:18,400 going to be trouble. It was going to be 36 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:20,959 a problem. It was going to be a problem 37 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:24,319 for you and it was going to be a problem 38 00:02:20,959 --> 00:02:28,400 for me. And I lived that way. 39 00:02:24,319 --> 00:02:31,959 And I tried with all of my intelligence, 40 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:31,959 all of my willpower 41 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:36,440 to stop 42 00:02:36,959 --> 00:02:43,599 all the self-nowledge I had. 43 00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:46,160 I was homeless. I was penniless. I was 44 00:02:43,599 --> 00:02:49,120 unemployable. My family had left. I had 45 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:53,239 died. 46 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:53,239 Tons of trouble with the law. 47 00:02:54,239 --> 00:03:00,080 Not enough. 48 00:02:57,519 --> 00:03:01,760 Not enough, 49 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:05,200 man. 50 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:09,239 So simple to take that for granted. So 51 00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:09,239 simple to take that for granted. 52 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:15,080 I don't today. As best I can, I don't. 53 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:24,560 I have my piping hot cup of Trader Joe's 54 00:03:21,599 --> 00:03:27,959 coffee here with me. 55 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:27,959 French roast. 56 00:03:28,239 --> 00:03:31,200 Although I have to say, we had some 57 00:03:29,599 --> 00:03:33,840 Colombian coffee the other day and it 58 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:36,959 was 59 00:03:33,840 --> 00:03:39,040 it scratched me right where I itch. 60 00:03:36,959 --> 00:03:42,640 But 61 00:03:39,040 --> 00:03:45,680 I'm really still on the French roast 62 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:47,440 jam right now. 63 00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:49,280 I have to tell you, I am in I don't know 64 00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:52,760 if I could be in a better mood. I don't 65 00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:52,760 This is like the 66 00:03:52,799 --> 00:03:57,879 best a person can feel while dressed. 67 00:03:58,879 --> 00:04:06,319 It's just I'm just in such a good mood. 68 00:04:02,879 --> 00:04:09,879 I'm so excited about life, about 69 00:04:06,319 --> 00:04:09,879 everything, about 70 00:04:10,239 --> 00:04:14,480 so many things. 71 00:04:12,799 --> 00:04:16,239 There's not enough hours in the day. All 72 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:19,680 the things I want to do, all the people 73 00:04:16,239 --> 00:04:21,759 I want to talk to, 74 00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:25,040 all the things I want to create, the 75 00:04:21,759 --> 00:04:28,639 music I want to make, the the memes, the 76 00:04:25,040 --> 00:04:33,320 books, all of it. I'm just so I'm just 77 00:04:28,639 --> 00:04:33,320 on fire for life. 78 00:04:36,639 --> 00:04:40,759 It's the happiest I've ever been. 79 00:04:42,240 --> 00:04:47,400 I have relationships today that are just 80 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:47,400 mind-blowing. 81 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:57,080 I have relationships in my life that are 82 00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:57,080 so mind. They're blowing my mind. 83 00:05:01,919 --> 00:05:04,919 Crazy. 84 00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:12,080 It's a good feeling when you love 85 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:14,639 people. It's an amazing feeling when you 86 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:18,840 love people. 87 00:05:14,639 --> 00:05:18,840 It feels infinitely better 88 00:05:19,759 --> 00:05:24,240 than feeling loved, as good as that 89 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:27,240 feels as well. But it's just the feeling 90 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:27,240 of 91 00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:34,080 empathy and compassion and love and 92 00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:35,759 concern and interest in the well-being 93 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:38,320 of other people is just the best feeling 94 00:05:35,759 --> 00:05:41,479 in the world. It's the best feeling I've 95 00:05:38,320 --> 00:05:41,479 ever known. 96 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:47,240 Yeah, man. 97 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:51,759 There's times I see it clearer than 98 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:54,240 other times. This is one of those times 99 00:05:51,759 --> 00:05:59,639 I just I'm so honed in on the fact that 100 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:59,639 I'm just nothing special at all. 101 00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:05,080 I 102 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:11,039 if I stay on this trajectory a year from 103 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:12,880 now if I were to listen to today's 104 00:06:11,039 --> 00:06:15,440 podcast it would annoy me because I 105 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:19,759 would hear selfishness in it 106 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:22,720 that I couldn't hear at the time. 107 00:06:19,759 --> 00:06:28,440 I'm just always wanting to grow, be 108 00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:28,440 better, do better, listen better. 109 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:38,000 I've just always wanted to do that. I 110 00:06:33,919 --> 00:06:41,639 really sincerely want to do that. 111 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:41,639 I was in a meeting 112 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:47,840 and I 113 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:51,199 didn't agree with what was being shared 114 00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:54,199 and I got really judgmental in my 115 00:06:51,199 --> 00:06:54,199 thoughts. 116 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:59,759 you know, this isn't 117 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:05,759 in the big book or this is, you know, 118 00:06:59,759 --> 00:07:08,759 some nonsense and some arrogant entitled 119 00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:08,759 um 120 00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:16,759 just arrogance, entitlement. 121 00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:24,960 Then I was like, you know what? Who are 122 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:28,759 you? Who are you to judge anyone 123 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:28,759 for anything? 124 00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:37,599 I start talking to myself. Who are you, 125 00:07:34,639 --> 00:07:40,560 Mr. Holier than thou 126 00:07:37,599 --> 00:07:42,400 really? 127 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:45,400 You know what people need to hear. You 128 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:45,400 know 129 00:07:45,919 --> 00:07:52,000 what's right and what's wrong. Who the 130 00:07:48,479 --> 00:07:52,000 hell do you think you are? 131 00:07:54,319 --> 00:07:58,440 You're alive because of grace 132 00:07:58,560 --> 00:08:02,639 and you're not God. Quite far from it. 133 00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:05,639 You don't know what the hell anyone 134 00:08:02,639 --> 00:08:05,639 needs. 135 00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:09,919 Well, you know one thing, they don't 136 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:14,199 need one more person sitting there 137 00:08:09,919 --> 00:08:14,199 looking down at people. I mean, 138 00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:18,280 get real. 139 00:08:20,479 --> 00:08:24,319 First of all, I started thinking of all 140 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:26,960 the things that helped me over the years 141 00:08:24,319 --> 00:08:30,960 that if I heard them today, I would be 142 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:34,520 like, "Yeah, that's not in the book." 143 00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:34,520 So, shut up. 144 00:08:35,919 --> 00:08:39,159 The arrogance 145 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:48,440 that I could have just boggles the mind. 146 00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:48,440 I I It's just Please 147 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:58,080 And fortunately, it was a 148 00:08:56,480 --> 00:09:03,279 that conversation that I started to have 149 00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:05,120 with myself really helped. And 150 00:09:03,279 --> 00:09:07,519 it's kind of like just being acquainted 151 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:09,680 with reality in a way where it's like in 152 00:09:07,519 --> 00:09:13,519 re you want to Hey, you're looking down 153 00:09:09,680 --> 00:09:17,440 at people. Do you want to Hi, reality's 154 00:09:13,519 --> 00:09:19,279 here. Can reality come in for a second? 155 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:22,279 Can you just sit down with reality for a 156 00:09:19,279 --> 00:09:22,279 second? 157 00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:27,680 Because the reality is you're not in a 158 00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:29,600 position to judge. You're not in a 159 00:09:27,680 --> 00:09:31,839 position to look down. You're not in a 160 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:35,760 position to 161 00:09:31,839 --> 00:09:37,440 tell yourself you know what's 162 00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:38,800 best for a meeting, how it should go, 163 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:40,959 how people should work the steps, how 164 00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:42,399 they shouldn't work the steps, who's 165 00:09:40,959 --> 00:09:43,680 sincere, who's not, who's going to get 166 00:09:42,399 --> 00:09:46,720 sober, who's not going to get sober. 167 00:09:43,680 --> 00:09:46,720 Shut up. 168 00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:55,040 You drank your ass into the ground, 169 00:09:51,680 --> 00:10:01,000 stumbled into the key, 170 00:09:55,040 --> 00:10:01,000 stumbled upon the key of life itself. 171 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:07,360 Not because you're a good person, not 172 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:10,360 because you were smart or sexy or 173 00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:10,360 bitching. 174 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:15,480 because of grace. 175 00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:23,920 So, shut up, 176 00:10:20,079 --> 00:10:25,200 I told myself. Shut up. Then I just 177 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:26,399 thought, you know what? I'm just going 178 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:29,800 to sit here in this meeting. I'm 179 00:10:26,399 --> 00:10:29,800 thinking about God. 180 00:10:31,279 --> 00:10:37,120 Listen, just listen. There's such a 181 00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:39,680 treasure at every meeting. 182 00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:43,279 The whole story is told about everything 183 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:45,040 in life in any given moment. 184 00:10:43,279 --> 00:10:47,120 The story isn't being told five minutes 185 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:49,440 from now or a year from now or a week 186 00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:53,279 from now. It's being told right now. 187 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:55,680 Right now, you're in a meeting. 188 00:10:53,279 --> 00:10:58,480 Listen. 189 00:10:55,680 --> 00:11:02,200 Find the treasure. 190 00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:02,200 Treasure is the moment. 191 00:11:02,399 --> 00:11:06,040 That's where God is. 192 00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:18,160 So 193 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:21,160 grateful to get the feedback from the 194 00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:21,160 last 195 00:11:21,839 --> 00:11:29,040 episode on what does the big book say. 196 00:11:23,839 --> 00:11:32,600 It's been all very positive and 197 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:32,600 people are excited 198 00:11:32,720 --> 00:11:38,720 and uh feels good 199 00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:42,079 to put it out there. 200 00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:46,720 I'm going to have Dave come back 201 00:11:42,079 --> 00:11:48,320 when we get to step four, which is a 202 00:11:46,720 --> 00:11:50,640 there's a lot to go over and there's 203 00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:54,880 lots 204 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:56,640 there's a lot there that um 205 00:11:54,880 --> 00:12:00,160 is definitely worth talking about. 206 00:11:56,640 --> 00:12:01,440 Pivotal moments, tools to use, 207 00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:03,839 all kinds of stuff. It's not just an 208 00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:06,160 inventory 209 00:12:03,839 --> 00:12:10,160 as we see when we go right through the 210 00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:12,880 big book. But so grateful to 211 00:12:10,160 --> 00:12:15,920 have him to help me 212 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:17,279 make sense of things. 213 00:12:15,920 --> 00:12:19,760 He has a lot of insight, a lot of 214 00:12:17,279 --> 00:12:21,839 experience. 215 00:12:19,760 --> 00:12:24,560 More than anything, he lives this stuff 216 00:12:21,839 --> 00:12:26,480 in his daily life. So what he says is 217 00:12:24,560 --> 00:12:28,880 golden to me because I watch it. I watch 218 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:31,200 his feet 219 00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:33,760 and he's not full of it. It's very 220 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:36,240 inspiring. 221 00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:38,480 So before I get into today's topic, I 222 00:12:36,240 --> 00:12:42,560 just want to say I just I just feel very 223 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:44,959 moved to say that 224 00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:48,639 um again, even though I've said it, this 225 00:12:44,959 --> 00:12:51,519 isn't I'm not an expert. Dave is not an 226 00:12:48,639 --> 00:12:54,720 expert. We're not gurus, nothing 227 00:12:51,519 --> 00:12:56,639 special. We're very blessed, very 228 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:58,320 fortunate 229 00:12:56,639 --> 00:13:00,399 ex-pros drinkers who have found a 230 00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:03,120 solution, who are living in a a life 231 00:13:00,399 --> 00:13:06,560 beyond their wildest dreams, 232 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:08,000 who are moved to help and share, 233 00:13:06,560 --> 00:13:11,519 experience, strength, and hope in any 234 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:15,360 way that we can, and that's it. 235 00:13:11,519 --> 00:13:18,959 So, I'm sure that very often it sounds 236 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:21,279 like there's more to it than that 237 00:13:18,959 --> 00:13:25,959 in our minds or in my mind. I'll just 238 00:13:21,279 --> 00:13:25,959 speak for myself, but I just 239 00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:32,240 I'm super clear on the fact that I am 240 00:13:28,560 --> 00:13:34,240 nothing without God. 241 00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:37,600 Nothing. 242 00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:40,000 And am in no position to judge anyone or 243 00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:45,480 anything. 244 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:45,480 Zero exception to that. 245 00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:51,279 So, I'm trying to do better. I'm trying 246 00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:55,000 to grow. trying to learn 247 00:13:51,279 --> 00:13:55,000 and um 248 00:13:55,200 --> 00:14:00,480 yeah today I will continue 249 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:02,880 with what does the big book say and 250 00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:08,120 today talk about what the big book says 251 00:14:02,880 --> 00:14:08,120 about step two in my understanding 252 00:14:13,279 --> 00:14:17,519 one of the guys who used to go to the 253 00:14:14,639 --> 00:14:18,959 original study used to say some of the 254 00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:21,199 steps are not really steps their 255 00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:23,760 statements 256 00:14:21,199 --> 00:14:26,800 and at the time I didn't 257 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:31,800 really understand that completely 258 00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:31,800 as I feel I understand it today. 259 00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:37,040 Originally there were six steps. There 260 00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:40,560 were six steps that the founders did. 261 00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:44,199 I'll read them to you. 262 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:44,199 Let me get my glasses. 263 00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:49,920 They're lightning bolt glasses. 264 00:14:46,079 --> 00:14:49,920 Something my agent wants me to wear. 265 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:53,680 They're also not reading glasses. 266 00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:57,680 They're just dark sunglasses. So now I 267 00:14:53,680 --> 00:15:00,680 can't find at all what I'm looking for. 268 00:14:57,680 --> 00:15:00,680 Um, 269 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:11,959 okay. 270 00:15:08,079 --> 00:15:11,959 It's not going to be in there. 271 00:15:12,399 --> 00:15:16,320 All right. 272 00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:18,480 Isn't this good? Isn't this good podcast 273 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:20,160 listening? What are you listening to? 274 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:21,839 What are you listening to, sweetie? Oh, 275 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:24,320 I'm listening to this guy. He's looking 276 00:15:21,839 --> 00:15:26,240 for a page. He hasn't found it yet. It's 277 00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:28,399 really entertaining. 278 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:30,399 It's really good. 279 00:15:28,399 --> 00:15:32,399 I can hear pages flipping. He's He must 280 00:15:30,399 --> 00:15:35,440 be searching for it. It's really 281 00:15:32,399 --> 00:15:39,040 excellent radio. 282 00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:40,959 Okay. The original six steps 283 00:15:39,040 --> 00:15:42,959 went a little something like this. there 284 00:15:40,959 --> 00:15:48,240 in a story 285 00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:52,199 in the back of the book called 286 00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:52,199 He Sold Himself Short. 287 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:58,279 And in the third edition, it's on page 288 00:15:55,279 --> 00:15:58,279 292. 289 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:01,320 And 290 00:16:02,160 --> 00:16:09,360 it says step one, complete deflation. 291 00:16:06,880 --> 00:16:14,000 That's it. 292 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:17,240 Complete deflation. That's step one. 293 00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:17,240 Not complicated. 294 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:22,639 Personal and subjective. Complete 295 00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:24,240 deflation. 296 00:16:22,639 --> 00:16:26,560 Two, dependence and guidance from a 297 00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:28,880 higher power. Three, moral inventory. 298 00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:30,720 Four, confession. Five, restitution. 299 00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:32,480 Six, continued work with other 300 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:35,480 alcoholics. That's what the founders 301 00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:35,480 did. 302 00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:40,120 very unfussy. 303 00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:47,199 So this gentleman, his name was Rick. 304 00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:50,600 He's still sober. He's sober for like 45 305 00:16:47,199 --> 00:16:50,600 years or something. 306 00:16:50,959 --> 00:16:56,000 He used to say, you know, there's steps 307 00:16:54,079 --> 00:16:57,360 that are really statements rather than 308 00:16:56,000 --> 00:17:00,160 steps. And if you're looking at the big 309 00:16:57,360 --> 00:17:03,759 book as if uh 310 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:06,000 it is a recipe to make something, 311 00:17:03,759 --> 00:17:08,640 um step one and step two are really a 312 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:11,679 gathering of ingredients 313 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:14,240 more than actual steps. They're kind of 314 00:17:11,679 --> 00:17:18,640 a gathering of of ingredients. 315 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:20,319 Step two is an ongoing thing in a way 316 00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:24,919 as implied in the chapter that deals 317 00:17:20,319 --> 00:17:24,919 with step two. We agnostics. 318 00:17:25,919 --> 00:17:32,720 So I'll start by just keeping this super 319 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:34,720 super simple. 320 00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:36,720 This is what 321 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:39,960 the consensus 322 00:17:36,720 --> 00:17:39,960 came to. 323 00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:44,960 Oh, these are the consensus that we 324 00:17:42,640 --> 00:17:48,880 these are the consenses. 325 00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:52,880 The consensi is that the plural 326 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:55,440 um that the group always came to uh 327 00:17:52,880 --> 00:18:00,880 after studying 328 00:17:55,440 --> 00:18:02,960 step two and there's two things. 329 00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,720 One 330 00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:07,200 again just like step one there's no 331 00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:10,400 clear-cut directions in the big book for 332 00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:12,880 step two. there's no way to tell someone 333 00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:15,840 how to 334 00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:17,440 arrive at this place. So they in the 335 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:20,559 chapter we agnostics which deals with 336 00:18:17,440 --> 00:18:21,919 step two 337 00:18:20,559 --> 00:18:26,760 they talk about all these stumbling 338 00:18:21,919 --> 00:18:26,760 blocks people have with the idea of God 339 00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:34,080 and there's so profound things in there. 340 00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:36,080 One of them is which my friend Dave is 341 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:38,160 very fond of talking about. It says deep 342 00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:40,400 down in every man, woman and child is 343 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:42,720 the fundamental idea of God. It's in 344 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:45,520 everyone. It's right there. 345 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:49,400 maybe obscured by 346 00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:49,400 worldly clamor and 347 00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:55,039 basically it's hidden by self and all 348 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:57,679 kinds of things like that. But 349 00:18:55,039 --> 00:19:00,400 it's there deep down inside of all of 350 00:18:57,679 --> 00:19:03,400 us. It's there. 351 00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:03,400 And 352 00:19:03,919 --> 00:19:07,240 it says 353 00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:14,400 we had to ask ourselves one question. 354 00:19:11,679 --> 00:19:15,840 Do we now believe or are we willing to 355 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:18,840 believe there's a power greater than 356 00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:18,840 ourselves? 357 00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:25,679 And it says as soon as someone can say 358 00:19:23,360 --> 00:19:28,160 they do believe or are even willing to 359 00:19:25,679 --> 00:19:30,559 believe that is enough. That's the 360 00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:31,919 cornerstone. 361 00:19:30,559 --> 00:19:34,000 As we go through the steps, we're 362 00:19:31,919 --> 00:19:36,640 building a spiritual structure. We're 363 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:40,320 building this arch through which we pass 364 00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:42,640 free of the desire to drink or use. 365 00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:47,240 It's pretty incredible and free of a 366 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:47,240 bunch of other stuff, too. But 367 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:51,679 keeping it simple, that's the purpose of 368 00:19:49,760 --> 00:19:53,200 the arch. That's what we're free from. 369 00:19:51,679 --> 00:19:54,640 We can go anywhere. We can do anything. 370 00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:56,320 We can go be a musician. We can go to 371 00:19:54,640 --> 00:19:59,280 weddings. We can go to whoopee parties. 372 00:19:56,320 --> 00:20:02,160 We can go to bars. We can go 373 00:19:59,280 --> 00:20:06,480 We could be around alcohol eventually. 374 00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:09,039 Go anywhere in this world. Any free 375 00:20:06,480 --> 00:20:10,960 person can go. 376 00:20:09,039 --> 00:20:13,600 So, we're going to build a spiritual 377 00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:16,919 arch. And step two is the first stone. 378 00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:16,919 It's the cornerstone 379 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:25,760 and I'll read it. 380 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:30,400 It is on page hold on here. I'm doing it 381 00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:32,720 again. You love that. Okay. 382 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:34,880 Page 47. Right in the middle. We needed 383 00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:38,159 to ask ourselves but one short question. 384 00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:39,440 Do I now believe or am I even willing to 385 00:20:38,159 --> 00:20:41,760 believe that there's a power greater 386 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:43,440 than myself? Soon as a man can say that 387 00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:45,200 he does believe or is willing to 388 00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:47,360 believe, we emphatically assure him he 389 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:49,600 is on his way. 390 00:20:47,360 --> 00:20:51,520 It is repeatedly, it has been repeatedly 391 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:54,880 proven among us that upon this simple 392 00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:59,120 cornerstone, a wonderfully effective 393 00:20:54,880 --> 00:21:02,159 spiritual structure can be built. 394 00:20:59,120 --> 00:21:03,840 Cornerstone is the first stone laid in 395 00:21:02,159 --> 00:21:09,159 construction. So it's important because 396 00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:09,159 everything is built in relation to it. 397 00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:14,720 But that's 398 00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:18,120 that's the requirement of step two in 399 00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:18,120 the big book 400 00:21:22,159 --> 00:21:25,919 in terms of building this spiritual 401 00:21:23,679 --> 00:21:29,480 structure. 402 00:21:25,919 --> 00:21:29,480 That's what's needed. 403 00:21:31,039 --> 00:21:34,799 As soon as somebody could say they're 404 00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:36,720 willing to believe, think about how, you 405 00:21:34,799 --> 00:21:38,720 know, it says also in there that the 406 00:21:36,720 --> 00:21:41,440 realm of God in their experience is 407 00:21:38,720 --> 00:21:42,960 broad and roomy. It's never inclusive or 408 00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:46,640 forbidding to anyone who earnestly 409 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:48,559 seeks. It's open to everyone. 410 00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:51,120 Just imagine broad and roomy what that 411 00:21:48,559 --> 00:21:53,120 means. It's like, 412 00:21:51,120 --> 00:21:57,919 come on in. There's plenty of room in 413 00:21:53,120 --> 00:22:00,480 here. The entryway is wide. Come on in. 414 00:21:57,919 --> 00:22:02,320 It's not narrow. You don't have to get 415 00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,760 through a doggy door to get here. You 416 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:05,679 don't have to do somersaults or going 417 00:22:03,760 --> 00:22:07,520 backwards or write a bunch of stuff or 418 00:22:05,679 --> 00:22:09,440 whatever. 419 00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:11,520 If you're willing to believe there's a 420 00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:15,000 power greater than you, that's enough. 421 00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:15,000 That's an incredible 422 00:22:15,120 --> 00:22:18,360 That's incredible. 423 00:22:19,679 --> 00:22:24,320 And in the big book, 424 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:26,080 that's enough. 425 00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:27,760 You're laying down the cornerstone to 426 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:32,120 this spiritual structure. As soon as you 427 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:32,120 can say, "I'm willing to believe. 428 00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:40,799 There's nothing more required. 429 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:43,600 You're not you're not you don't have to 430 00:22:40,799 --> 00:22:46,080 believe. 431 00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:49,280 I mean, this is how this is how open it 432 00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:50,880 is. This is how 433 00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:53,440 inclusive it is. You don't have to 434 00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:55,360 believe." 435 00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:57,200 In a way, how could you sometimes? I 436 00:22:55,360 --> 00:23:00,520 mean, you haven't. 437 00:22:57,200 --> 00:23:00,520 I don't know. 438 00:23:03,039 --> 00:23:07,880 Some people believe very strongly, 439 00:23:09,039 --> 00:23:15,840 but some people don't and couldn't and 440 00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:18,720 for whatever reason. And 441 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:20,559 but how open and inviting is that? As 442 00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:23,840 soon as somebody can say they are 443 00:23:20,559 --> 00:23:27,960 willing to believe that is enough to get 444 00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:27,960 your ass up to step three 445 00:23:31,360 --> 00:23:39,799 in the big book. There is no writing 446 00:23:33,919 --> 00:23:39,799 assignment for step two. It's not there. 447 00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:45,679 If you do that and it helps you, that's 448 00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:48,080 wonderful. 449 00:23:45,679 --> 00:23:51,080 I'm just saying it is not in the big 450 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:51,080 book. 451 00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:59,360 So I wouldn't say I'm going right out of 452 00:23:56,240 --> 00:24:00,720 the big book 453 00:23:59,360 --> 00:24:02,640 because that's not right out of the big 454 00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:04,159 book. Right out of the big book is are 455 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:06,480 you willing to believe there's a power 456 00:24:04,159 --> 00:24:09,480 greater than yourself? Then go to step 457 00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:09,480 three. 458 00:24:12,559 --> 00:24:17,000 So that's one thing I wanted to say. 459 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:24,200 Keep it super simple 460 00:24:19,919 --> 00:24:24,200 because it's super simple. 461 00:24:24,559 --> 00:24:28,279 The other thing is 462 00:24:28,559 --> 00:24:32,200 I want to talk about 463 00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:36,559 step two. What it says came to believe 464 00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:40,000 that a power greater than ourselves 465 00:24:36,559 --> 00:24:44,200 could restore us to sanity. 466 00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:44,200 because there's certainly a lot there. 467 00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:50,559 And part of the reason the untangling of 468 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:52,799 all this was so important to me is 469 00:24:50,559 --> 00:24:54,960 because the more untangled it is from 470 00:24:52,799 --> 00:24:58,159 the get-go, the more sense it makes as 471 00:24:54,960 --> 00:25:00,080 it goes along. The more tangled up as it 472 00:24:58,159 --> 00:25:03,039 is at the beginning, the less sense it 473 00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:05,440 makes as it goes along. 474 00:25:03,039 --> 00:25:08,760 For example, if I am told I'm always 475 00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:08,760 going to be insane, 476 00:25:09,039 --> 00:25:13,840 what the hell is step two? 477 00:25:12,480 --> 00:25:15,440 Came to believe a power greater than 478 00:25:13,840 --> 00:25:19,000 myself will never restore me to sanity 479 00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:19,000 is what it should say. 480 00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:26,240 But it says, "Came to believe a power 481 00:25:24,159 --> 00:25:28,080 greater than ourselves would restore us 482 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:30,000 to sanity." 483 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:33,200 We looked up the word restore. We talked 484 00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:35,039 about restore. We looked up 485 00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:38,720 In this exhaustive study, we went over 486 00:25:35,039 --> 00:25:40,960 this for months. The big book says we 487 00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:42,480 become alcoholics in the not there's 488 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:45,120 stories in the back that say otherwise. 489 00:25:42,480 --> 00:25:47,360 But again, going back to the first 490 00:25:45,120 --> 00:25:49,279 episode of this, we studied the first 491 00:25:47,360 --> 00:25:52,760 164 pages for some very compelling 492 00:25:49,279 --> 00:25:52,760 reasons. But 493 00:25:53,600 --> 00:25:57,559 according to the uh 494 00:25:57,679 --> 00:26:03,039 everything up to page 103 where the 495 00:25:59,840 --> 00:26:05,840 clear-cut directions 496 00:26:03,039 --> 00:26:09,480 stop concerning the program of action 497 00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:09,480 laid out in the book 498 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:13,279 for the alcoholic who wants to recover 499 00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:16,520 from a seemingly hopeless state of mind 500 00:26:13,279 --> 00:26:16,520 and body. 501 00:26:20,559 --> 00:26:24,880 They say we become alcoholics at some 502 00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:29,559 stage in our drinking. We become 503 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:29,559 alcoholics. We cross a line. 504 00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:34,880 In other words, at some point in our 505 00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:38,799 life, according to the big book's 506 00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:39,919 definition of insanity, we were sane 507 00:26:38,799 --> 00:26:42,080 because they're not talking about 508 00:26:39,919 --> 00:26:45,679 character defects. They're not talking 509 00:26:42,080 --> 00:26:46,640 about fear, not feeling like you fit in. 510 00:26:45,679 --> 00:26:47,919 They're not talking about your 511 00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:50,919 shortcomings. I'm not talking about your 512 00:26:47,919 --> 00:26:50,919 selfishness. 513 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:58,600 They say in the big book, we feel we 514 00:26:55,039 --> 00:26:58,600 probably could have stopped 515 00:26:58,960 --> 00:27:06,240 on our own at some point, 516 00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:08,640 but we just didn't want to. 517 00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:11,640 And they talk about that. That's very 518 00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:11,640 important 519 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:16,440 because that's why they use the word 520 00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:16,440 restore. 521 00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:21,840 I invite you to read it. Read about it. 522 00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:24,320 Read about read there as a solution and 523 00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:27,200 more about alcoholism. 524 00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:28,960 They talk about this. 525 00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:31,039 So came to believe a power greater than 526 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:32,799 ourselves could restore. So first of all 527 00:27:31,039 --> 00:27:36,559 came to believe doesn't it's very 528 00:27:32,799 --> 00:27:39,200 different than I believe. 529 00:27:36,559 --> 00:27:41,120 We we came to believe and again the 530 00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:45,360 direction in the book is just are you 531 00:27:41,120 --> 00:27:47,919 willing are you open to the idea. 532 00:27:45,360 --> 00:27:52,080 So came to believe that a power greater 533 00:27:47,919 --> 00:27:54,720 than herself could restore 534 00:27:52,080 --> 00:27:57,039 us to sanity. So the other thing I want 535 00:27:54,720 --> 00:28:00,039 to talk about is what they mean by 536 00:27:57,039 --> 00:28:00,039 sanity. 537 00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:07,279 One of the things we spent a lot of time 538 00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:10,080 on is this insanity. Sanity sely. Sely 539 00:28:07,279 --> 00:28:12,320 sane. Insane. 540 00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:16,080 We looked every reference to these words 541 00:28:12,320 --> 00:28:18,320 up in the first 164 pages, 542 00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:21,799 read them in their context, dis 543 00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:21,799 discussed them 544 00:28:22,559 --> 00:28:27,440 in big groups 545 00:28:24,799 --> 00:28:30,159 and we came to a consensus and the 546 00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:32,480 consensus is this. 547 00:28:30,159 --> 00:28:34,640 The big book 548 00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:38,159 talks about two different types of 549 00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:41,919 insanity. One, it talks about permanent 550 00:28:38,159 --> 00:28:44,480 insanity, wet brain. It references that 551 00:28:41,919 --> 00:28:45,919 several times, but you can put that 552 00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:48,240 aside because that's not what they're 553 00:28:45,919 --> 00:28:50,240 referring to in step two. 554 00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:53,120 Overwhelmingly, 555 00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:57,200 what they're talking about is their own 556 00:28:53,120 --> 00:29:00,000 unique definition of insanity. 557 00:28:57,200 --> 00:29:02,320 It's unique. 558 00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:04,080 It is not simply doing the same thing 559 00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:05,840 over and over and expecting different 560 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:08,159 results. 561 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:10,080 a form of this insanity has nothing two 562 00:29:08,159 --> 00:29:12,640 forms of this insanity has nothing to do 563 00:29:10,080 --> 00:29:14,480 with this. It's not that 564 00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:16,720 they say whatever the precise definition 565 00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:19,360 of the word may be. We call it plain 566 00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:23,039 insanity and they talk about our 567 00:29:19,360 --> 00:29:26,559 thinking and this is the important part 568 00:29:23,039 --> 00:29:29,520 as it relates to the first drink 569 00:29:26,559 --> 00:29:32,880 and that's it. 570 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:34,960 And they say it is one or more of these 571 00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:37,600 three things. This is how it is 572 00:29:34,960 --> 00:29:41,520 described. One, 573 00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:43,520 the thought of I'm going to drink again. 574 00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:46,520 I know it's going to happen and I don't 575 00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:46,520 care. 576 00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:51,440 The founders said, "We don't know what 577 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:54,640 to call that, so we're just going to 578 00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:57,520 call it insane." Because with you where 579 00:29:54,640 --> 00:30:00,880 you're at, your family terrified, your 580 00:29:57,520 --> 00:30:04,080 job in jeopardy, your health flailing, 581 00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:05,760 for you to decide to drink is insane. 582 00:30:04,080 --> 00:30:08,159 We don't know what else to call it. 583 00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:12,360 Don't look up the definition of insane. 584 00:30:08,159 --> 00:30:12,360 It's not what we're talking about. 585 00:30:15,279 --> 00:30:21,600 However intelligent we may have been in 586 00:30:18,159 --> 00:30:24,320 other respects, where alcohol is 587 00:30:21,600 --> 00:30:28,919 concerned, we have been strangely 588 00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:28,919 insane. End quote. 589 00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:34,720 There it was. The insidious insanity. 590 00:30:31,679 --> 00:30:36,559 that first drink, 591 00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:39,679 the insanity of the first drink, the 592 00:30:36,559 --> 00:30:43,520 insanity of alcohol. 593 00:30:39,679 --> 00:30:46,320 So, that's one. Two is 594 00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:50,159 this time it's going to be different. 595 00:30:46,320 --> 00:30:52,000 I I This time I'm going to 596 00:30:50,159 --> 00:30:53,919 control it. Drink at a different time. 597 00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:55,760 Drink a different thing. Drink it at a 598 00:30:53,919 --> 00:30:57,679 different location. Drink it with 599 00:30:55,760 --> 00:31:02,120 different people. Only have a couple. 600 00:30:57,679 --> 00:31:02,120 Only have five. Only have 10. 601 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:08,159 And the founders say whatever the 602 00:31:05,919 --> 00:31:11,279 precise definition of this is in light 603 00:31:08,159 --> 00:31:12,960 of your circumstances that's insane. We 604 00:31:11,279 --> 00:31:15,679 don't know. We don't know. We do not 605 00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:18,880 know what else to call it. 606 00:31:15,679 --> 00:31:22,600 The third thing is 607 00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:22,600 no thought at all. 608 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:26,880 It's 6:00. 609 00:31:24,960 --> 00:31:28,960 No thought of drinking. I'm going to a 610 00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:31,120 place I've gone sober for years and 611 00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:34,360 never thought of drinking. 601 I'm 612 00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:34,360 buying alcohol. 613 00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:41,919 The subtle insanity that first drink. So 614 00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:46,480 in the big book, the consensus that we 615 00:31:41,919 --> 00:31:47,840 reached repeatedly for 616 00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:49,679 throughout the course of this entire 617 00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:51,440 study is that when the big book talks 618 00:31:49,679 --> 00:31:53,120 about insanity, 619 00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:54,880 it is not talking about your character 620 00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:56,960 defects. It's not talking about your 621 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,559 selfishness. It's not talking about your 622 00:31:56,960 --> 00:32:00,240 fears. It's not talking about you not 623 00:31:58,559 --> 00:32:02,000 fitting in. It's not talking about you 624 00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:03,200 being lazy, procrastination. It's not 625 00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:04,960 talking about you not wanting to go to 626 00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:06,720 meetings. It's not talking about you 627 00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:08,960 being in terrible relationships that are 628 00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:10,880 awful for you. 629 00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:14,080 It's talking about the three things I 630 00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:17,600 just mentioned. And that's it. 631 00:32:14,080 --> 00:32:21,360 That's what it's talking about. 632 00:32:17,600 --> 00:32:23,279 So keeping that in mind 633 00:32:21,360 --> 00:32:28,360 came to believe a power greater than 634 00:32:23,279 --> 00:32:28,360 oursel could restore us to sanity 635 00:32:31,519 --> 00:32:35,080 is very different. 636 00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:41,039 According to the big book, we are 637 00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:42,799 restored to sanity and after we are 638 00:32:41,039 --> 00:32:44,480 restored to sanity continue to have 639 00:32:42,799 --> 00:32:47,840 resentments and fears and character 640 00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:49,919 defects and selfishness. 641 00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:52,919 After we are restored to sanity, we 642 00:32:49,919 --> 00:32:52,919 continue 643 00:32:53,279 --> 00:32:57,720 to suffer from our al alcoholism 644 00:33:00,799 --> 00:33:04,519 and we'll get to that. 645 00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:08,640 But the idea of being restored to 646 00:33:06,240 --> 00:33:11,120 sanity, meaning that you don't have 647 00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:13,760 character defects anymore, is not what 648 00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:17,120 we arrived at. It's not related to that 649 00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:19,440 at all. They're talking about 650 00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:21,360 the main problem of the alcoholic. The 651 00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:23,360 insanity of the first drink, the idea 652 00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:24,880 that I'm I can drink again or the idea 653 00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:26,799 that it'll be different or the idea that 654 00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:29,600 I don't care or no thought at all, I 655 00:33:26,799 --> 00:33:32,000 just drink again. The powerlessness over 656 00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:34,559 alcohol 657 00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:37,679 that we have 658 00:33:34,559 --> 00:33:40,480 gets solved. 659 00:33:37,679 --> 00:33:42,640 That's why the big book says the problem 660 00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:44,399 gets removed. The problem gets solved. 661 00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:47,279 The problem is disappeared. We are 662 00:33:44,399 --> 00:33:49,919 restored to sanity. 663 00:33:47,279 --> 00:33:52,720 That's why it says we are relieved of 664 00:33:49,919 --> 00:33:55,440 our alcoholism. That's why it says we 665 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:58,080 have recovered. 666 00:33:55,440 --> 00:34:01,519 According 667 00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:04,480 to the big book in our study, the 668 00:34:01,519 --> 00:34:08,760 consensus was 669 00:34:04,480 --> 00:34:08,760 a recovered alcoholic. 670 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:14,000 Could be 671 00:34:11,359 --> 00:34:16,000 somebody super spiritually fit, obvious 672 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:19,280 to all, with no desire to drink. And 673 00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:22,000 they can be somebody who's 674 00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:25,679 not super spiritually fit, obvious to 675 00:34:22,000 --> 00:34:30,440 all, but in a place where they have no 676 00:34:25,679 --> 00:34:30,440 desire to drink today. 677 00:34:34,159 --> 00:34:41,159 In other words, 678 00:34:36,560 --> 00:34:41,159 we had arrived at it's not related. 679 00:34:41,679 --> 00:34:45,839 And if this all seems tangled up and 680 00:34:43,359 --> 00:34:47,440 confused, stay with me. 681 00:34:45,839 --> 00:34:51,040 It gets clearer and clearer in my 682 00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:53,359 experience as the study goes on. 683 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:57,040 So to recap and to summarize in a really 684 00:34:53,359 --> 00:34:59,599 simple way, step two, there's no writing 685 00:34:57,040 --> 00:35:01,280 instructions in the big book about step 686 00:34:59,599 --> 00:35:03,359 two. 687 00:35:01,280 --> 00:35:05,280 It's not there. 688 00:35:03,359 --> 00:35:08,079 Step two says, "As soon as a person can 689 00:35:05,280 --> 00:35:11,079 say they're willing to believe, that's 690 00:35:08,079 --> 00:35:11,079 enough 691 00:35:11,359 --> 00:35:17,200 for a wonderfully effective spiritual 692 00:35:14,079 --> 00:35:21,000 structure to begin to be built 693 00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:21,000 for that is the cornerstone." 694 00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:28,640 When they say, "Came to believe a power 695 00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:30,240 greater than ourselves could restore us 696 00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:31,920 to sanity," they might as well have 697 00:35:30,240 --> 00:35:35,040 said, "Came to believe that a power 698 00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:39,960 greater than ourselves could solve the 699 00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:39,960 main problem of the alcoholic, 700 00:35:42,240 --> 00:35:50,760 could take away my desire to drink 701 00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:50,760 a day at a time permanently." 702 00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:56,000 came to believe a power gra theirselves 703 00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:57,760 could 704 00:35:56,000 --> 00:36:00,400 place me in a position of neutrality 705 00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:01,839 concerning alcohol where I feel safe and 706 00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:06,200 protected and I'm not interested. I 707 00:36:01,839 --> 00:36:06,200 recoil from it as from a hot flame. 708 00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:13,440 And there's a lot of reasons that was 709 00:36:10,240 --> 00:36:17,520 important for me 710 00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:20,560 in my own sobriety to learn and 711 00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:23,520 understand these things. 712 00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:26,320 One is 713 00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:28,960 it makes a big difference in terms of 714 00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:32,760 articulating things in a way that says 715 00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:32,760 that the program works. 716 00:36:33,760 --> 00:36:38,040 You do get restored to sanity. 717 00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:48,880 What has happened with the insanity is 718 00:36:46,480 --> 00:36:50,560 just it's 719 00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:55,359 the poor big book doesn't stand a chance 720 00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:58,560 anymore really because it's so 721 00:36:55,359 --> 00:37:01,359 it's not understood. 722 00:36:58,560 --> 00:37:03,359 What I'm saying right now is not the 723 00:37:01,359 --> 00:37:05,440 common understanding in my experience 724 00:37:03,359 --> 00:37:07,359 anywhere. 725 00:37:05,440 --> 00:37:10,320 People 726 00:37:07,359 --> 00:37:12,800 have been told that they're crazy. 727 00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:15,520 They're always going to be crazy. That 728 00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:18,000 might be true, but that's not related to 729 00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:19,440 step two. 730 00:37:18,000 --> 00:37:20,880 Mike used to always say, "If you throw 731 00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:22,320 your mom down the stairs, but you don't 732 00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:26,680 have a desire to drink, according to the 733 00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:26,680 big book, you are completely sane." 734 00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:33,400 Because they're not talking about 735 00:37:29,920 --> 00:37:33,400 anything else. 736 00:37:35,119 --> 00:37:39,960 I was thinking about it cuz 737 00:37:41,839 --> 00:37:45,960 I was thinking about the other day. 738 00:37:47,440 --> 00:37:55,040 I was thinking about um why it has 739 00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:56,480 why the message has become so garbled 740 00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:58,160 and twisted. And I was thinking about 741 00:37:56,480 --> 00:38:00,720 part of that and I was thinking about 742 00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:03,520 how first of all I couldn't not I'm an 743 00:38:00,720 --> 00:38:06,640 excellent reader. 744 00:38:03,520 --> 00:38:09,599 I'm really good reader now, but I never 745 00:38:06,640 --> 00:38:11,040 was. I had no I couldn't read at all 746 00:38:09,599 --> 00:38:13,680 when I got sober. I was a terrible 747 00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:16,880 reader when I got sober. Terrible. 748 00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:18,800 Zero comprehension skills. Zero. 749 00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:20,880 Ask me to read a sentence. Blah blah 750 00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:24,640 blah blah blah. 751 00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:26,640 Read it slow. Blah blah blah. Read it 752 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:28,000 fast. blah blah blah blah blah no 753 00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:31,079 comprehension skills didn't know what I 754 00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:31,079 was reading 755 00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:36,720 and I think that's extremely common I 756 00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:39,119 mean I've worked with a lot of people by 757 00:38:36,720 --> 00:38:42,320 the grace of God and 758 00:38:39,119 --> 00:38:43,920 I've asked a lot of questions I've read 759 00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:45,920 things with people and ask them what it 760 00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:48,960 means and it's very common to do the 761 00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:50,800 following to read a sentence 762 00:38:48,960 --> 00:38:53,599 apply it however you want to in any 763 00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:55,920 context you want to and run with it say 764 00:38:53,599 --> 00:38:57,280 this is what it means 765 00:38:55,920 --> 00:38:59,520 because I didn't understand the first 766 00:38:57,280 --> 00:39:01,599 sentence or the second sentence or I 767 00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:03,440 simply read one sentence that I really 768 00:39:01,599 --> 00:39:05,200 relate to and so that's just kind of I'm 769 00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:06,880 going to put that in context. I want to 770 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:08,640 put it in and that'll be the end of it. 771 00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:10,240 I think a lot of that has happened and a 772 00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:13,560 lot of that has happened and then been 773 00:39:10,240 --> 00:39:13,560 passed on 774 00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:18,480 and I can say that now because I'm an 775 00:39:16,720 --> 00:39:21,040 excellent reader as I said now I learned 776 00:39:18,480 --> 00:39:23,760 to read an alcoholics anonymous 777 00:39:21,040 --> 00:39:27,280 you know turns out I'm a nerd deans list 778 00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:29,359 honor student all that crazy stuff for 779 00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:33,320 somebody who used to light his desk on 780 00:39:29,359 --> 00:39:33,320 fire and throw it out of a window. 781 00:39:35,359 --> 00:39:43,320 So, I think that's part of how it came 782 00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:43,320 to be. So mocked up. 783 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:50,079 Now I know what long dashes mean in 784 00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:52,480 sentences, 785 00:39:50,079 --> 00:39:54,079 why you put commas in certain places. I 786 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:57,880 really have good comprehension skills. I 787 00:39:54,079 --> 00:39:57,880 can read things in their context. 788 00:39:58,480 --> 00:40:02,560 And um 789 00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:05,760 according to the big book, they're not 790 00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:09,200 talking about Einstein's insanity. 791 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:12,079 They're not talking about that. 792 00:40:09,200 --> 00:40:16,240 They're talking about a very unique 793 00:40:12,079 --> 00:40:17,520 definition which applies to 794 00:40:16,240 --> 00:40:19,920 the thought that precedes the first 795 00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:23,320 drink or lack thereof. 796 00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:23,320 And that's it. 797 00:40:23,839 --> 00:40:29,079 So we do get restored to sanity. We do 798 00:40:26,079 --> 00:40:29,079 recover. 799 00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:35,560 We do get relieved of our alcoholism and 800 00:40:31,599 --> 00:40:35,560 the problem does get removed. 801 00:40:35,680 --> 00:40:41,599 All of that is spoken about in a way 802 00:40:38,480 --> 00:40:47,200 that is interchangeable. 803 00:40:41,599 --> 00:40:51,280 All of it means the same thing which is 804 00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:53,920 we do get restored to sanity. 805 00:40:51,280 --> 00:40:56,400 Page 84 and 85 they describe that. We'll 806 00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:58,720 get to that. 807 00:40:56,400 --> 00:41:03,240 We'll talk about that and this what I 808 00:40:58,720 --> 00:41:03,240 have brought up this morning much more. 809 00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:12,960 Last thing I want to say about it is 810 00:41:09,599 --> 00:41:15,280 about the writing about a higher power 811 00:41:12,960 --> 00:41:16,800 which I have friends who have done this 812 00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:19,040 and it's helped them and that's 813 00:41:16,800 --> 00:41:20,480 wonderful. I'm not knocking it. I'm just 814 00:41:19,040 --> 00:41:22,640 saying it's not in the big book and I 815 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:24,880 think the reason it is not in the big 816 00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:26,240 book is because 817 00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:28,560 this is just personal. You could take 818 00:41:26,240 --> 00:41:30,800 this or leave this. Well, you take all 819 00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:33,359 this or leave it out. I don't even need 820 00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:36,359 to say that. Who the hell do I think I 821 00:41:33,359 --> 00:41:36,359 am? 822 00:41:38,800 --> 00:41:45,200 If I were to write about my higher power 823 00:41:42,240 --> 00:41:47,200 when I was on step two, I would be 824 00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:50,079 writing about something I've never 825 00:41:47,200 --> 00:41:53,079 experienced because I would still be 826 00:41:50,079 --> 00:41:53,079 blocked. 827 00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:58,079 So whatever I wrote about my higher 828 00:41:55,599 --> 00:42:02,079 power, no matter how incredible it was, 829 00:41:58,079 --> 00:42:03,839 no matter how enormous and beautiful and 830 00:42:02,079 --> 00:42:06,160 loving and all of it was, it would still 831 00:42:03,839 --> 00:42:09,280 be written 832 00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:11,920 from a state of consciousness 833 00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:15,560 that is limited 834 00:42:11,920 --> 00:42:15,560 compared to what 835 00:42:15,599 --> 00:42:23,280 it will be once I am unblocked through 836 00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:23,280 the process of steps three through nine. 837 00:42:24,079 --> 00:42:29,920 So to me, if I'm writing about God in 838 00:42:27,839 --> 00:42:32,240 step two, I'm limiting God because I'm 839 00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:34,640 saying I'm writing about it from my 840 00:42:32,240 --> 00:42:37,640 current mentality, which is going to 841 00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:37,640 change. 842 00:42:38,240 --> 00:42:43,680 And God's so much, oh my gosh, my 843 00:42:41,839 --> 00:42:48,359 experience is that God is just so much 844 00:42:43,680 --> 00:42:48,359 better than we make it sound. 845 00:42:53,520 --> 00:42:57,520 So, if you want to jump ahead on a 846 00:42:55,359 --> 00:42:59,839 podcast greater than yourself, I do. I 847 00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:02,880 go over step three the same way I'm 848 00:42:59,839 --> 00:43:07,000 going to go over it on this podcast. You 849 00:43:02,880 --> 00:43:07,000 want to sit tight and wait for that. 850 00:43:07,280 --> 00:43:13,119 And then after that, I will bring Dave 851 00:43:09,359 --> 00:43:16,119 back. We'll get into step four. 852 00:43:13,119 --> 00:43:16,119 So, 853 00:43:16,319 --> 00:43:21,800 please feel free free to write sarcastic 854 00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:21,800 bigbook@gmail. 855 00:43:22,079 --> 00:43:26,720 Um, message me on Instagram 856 00:43:24,240 --> 00:43:30,520 sarcastic.a.book. 857 00:43:26,720 --> 00:43:30,520 Go to my website sarcasticbigbook.com. 858 00:43:31,839 --> 00:43:37,520 I want to give a shout out to HappyJoy3 859 00:43:35,359 --> 00:43:41,160 on the East Coast. All those East 860 00:43:37,520 --> 00:43:41,160 Coasters over there. 861 00:43:41,440 --> 00:43:46,119 Hi Sarah. Hi McKenzie. 862 00:43:47,520 --> 00:43:51,680 Want to give a shout out to a podcast 863 00:43:48,880 --> 00:43:54,680 greater than yourself. So gratitudes 864 00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:54,680 podcast 865 00:43:54,720 --> 00:43:58,720 the black rhinos international big book 866 00:43:56,720 --> 00:44:00,400 study. 867 00:43:58,720 --> 00:44:04,760 Want to say hello to Chelsea. I want to 868 00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:04,760 say if anyone who needs to hear 869 00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:14,599 this I will say that everything is okay. 870 00:44:10,240 --> 00:44:14,599 I know that everything's okay. 871 00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:23,319 Don't yell butt me. 872 00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:23,319 I know it. 873 00:44:27,359 --> 00:44:32,880 Everything's okay. So, while I was 874 00:44:30,240 --> 00:44:36,880 recording this, I got so many messages 875 00:44:32,880 --> 00:44:40,560 from my agent. I have a new agent. 876 00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:43,440 His name is Thaad 877 00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:45,599 and uh he really wants me to redo the 878 00:44:43,440 --> 00:44:48,240 pumpkin shoot 879 00:44:45,599 --> 00:44:50,319 and uh the broken pumpkins on Instagram, 880 00:44:48,240 --> 00:44:51,839 but the story 881 00:44:50,319 --> 00:44:54,240 is 882 00:44:51,839 --> 00:44:57,119 it's a little vulgar. It's a little 883 00:44:54,240 --> 00:45:00,319 vulgar. I did break the pumpkin. So, I'm 884 00:44:57,119 --> 00:45:03,200 in this sober boys of summer. I'm a 885 00:45:00,319 --> 00:45:05,680 sober boys of summer 886 00:45:03,200 --> 00:45:08,720 uh AA model in this calendar. Silver 887 00:45:05,680 --> 00:45:11,200 Boys this summer and um I'm Mr. October 888 00:45:08,720 --> 00:45:13,520 because that's what my AA birthday is. 889 00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:15,760 And there was a scene that they had me, 890 00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:19,040 you know, 891 00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:20,560 doing they took pictures of um where I 892 00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:21,680 was just there with a pumpkin and that's 893 00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:23,520 it. I was just sitting there with a 894 00:45:21,680 --> 00:45:27,319 pumpkin and nothing else. And I broke 895 00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:27,319 the pumpkin. And 896 00:45:27,599 --> 00:45:30,160 you know, kids listen to the show, so 897 00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:33,319 I'm not going to tell you how I broke 898 00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:33,319 it, but 899 00:45:35,599 --> 00:45:40,560 we needed we need to reshoot it today is 900 00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:44,160 the bottom line. 901 00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:45,920 And then he got mad at me because 902 00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:47,440 Thad's like, "You can't use I can't 903 00:45:45,920 --> 00:45:48,880 believe it's not butter when we grease 904 00:45:47,440 --> 00:45:50,079 you up." Like, we got to use the real 905 00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:53,800 thing. Like, you're the real thing. We 906 00:45:50,079 --> 00:45:53,800 got to use the real thing. 907 00:45:54,079 --> 00:45:56,400 you know, unless you want to start 908 00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:58,000 calling yourself, I can't believe it's 909 00:45:56,400 --> 00:46:01,880 not Beachbot. And I was like, no, no, 910 00:45:58,000 --> 00:46:01,880 no. I don't want to do that. 911 00:46:04,480 --> 00:46:11,040 I I really entertain myself. 912 00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:13,359 All right, 913 00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:15,119 I'm going to go try to make this day so 914 00:46:13,359 --> 00:46:16,880 rad. 915 00:46:15,119 --> 00:46:20,720 I'm going to go try to make this day so 916 00:46:16,880 --> 00:46:22,800 awesome. My life was saved. So on that 917 00:46:20,720 --> 00:46:25,680 note, I am going to go try to live a 918 00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:29,119 life that was worth saving 919 00:46:25,680 --> 00:46:32,280 and I hope you'll do the same. 920 00:46:29,119 --> 00:46:32,280 Can I 921 00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:15,160 D. 922 00:48:17,280 --> 00:48:22,760 Hey. 923 00:48:19,760 --> 00:48:22,760 Hey.