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Welcome to this curated educational transcript of the Joe Rogan Experience. In this session, we provide a deep-dive examination of the critical perspectives and historical dialogues presented in Episode #1080. Our mission is to offer a high-fidelity, searchable research resource for students of cultural history, emerging technology, and global discourse. This transcript has been specifically optimized for academic reference, linguistic study, and archival preservation regarding Human Performance, Mental Toughness, and SEAL Team Endurance Protocols
Five four three two one Boom and we're live.

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Thanks for doing this man. I appreciate it. Thank

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you for having me. I appreciate that You're the

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only guy I've ever had in the studio where when

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I showed up you were working out That's what

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I do man. That's my life. That's my life. It's

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pretty crazy though I mean how much time did

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you have when you got here? I got here about

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an hour early. Oh Okay. Yeah, okay. We got a

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little early. So I got here shirt off doing chin

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-ups. It was hilarious I didn't get my camera

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out in time before you saw me. I wanted to take

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some pictures Well, maybe next time next time.

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Well, I'll catch you after the show You are a

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guy that for a lot of people you sort of embody

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the idea Hardening your mind and figuring out

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a way To do things that most people think are

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impossible That's you've sort of become that

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guy Over your life and you've become that guy

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for a lot of people including me online We've

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talked about you on the podcast a ton of times.

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So having you in here has been it's very exciting

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to me I appreciate that. Thank you. How'd you

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become that guy? You know what? I grew up not

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that guy yeah so a lot of people put a title

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on me they want to uh they see me now they see

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me now as the guy that with his shirt off who

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can do 4030 pull -ups in 17 hours you can run

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205 miles in 39 hours who can do all this crazy

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shit but what they don't understand is they don't

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understand the journey that it took me to get

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to this point and what got me to this point was

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i was just the opposite of what i am today i

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was that guy who ran away from absolutely everything

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that got in front of me. But not many people

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knew that. I had two people. Like the real me

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was like this very scared, insecure, stuttering,

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got beat up by his dad, all this kind of stuff.

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And then I built this fake person that walked

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around like my shit didn't stink, you know? Yeah,

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so that's kind of how I did it. And through process

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of time, I realized that I was lying to myself

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and lying to people. But that it's a fascinating

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journey though because you are that guy now,

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right? You genuinely are legit badass right at

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one point in time. You were a Legit terrified

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person. Yes. So what was the process like how

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did how did you step forth? Well, it's a it's

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a long process, right? I My dad beat the shit.

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I mean I was growing up. We I was the first black

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baby born in this hospital called Miller Fillmore

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in Buffalo, New York. My dad owns skating rinks.

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He owned bars. He ran prostitutes from Canada

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to Buffalo, New York. My dad was a big time pimp,

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big time. Anything bad about a person, big time

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hustler. He was American. You know, I'm with

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him, Daniel Washington. He was that, but not

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that bad. He wasn't that big, but that's what

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it reminds me of. He was that kind of guy. And

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beat the shit out of me, out of my mom. There

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was an incident one time when my mom got knocked

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out on top of the stairs and he drug her down

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the stairs by her hair. And at six years old,

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I'll never forget this. In my mind, I was always

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afraid. My whole life I was afraid, but I had

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this fucking voice, this conscience that would

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always be battling me saying, hey, you gotta

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get up and do something. I didn't wanna do shit.

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I was just afraid, but I would... That voice

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would force me to get up and my dad, you know,

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I try to beat him up whatever at six and I get

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my ass kicked. So this went on for several years

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and I have a big time learning disability because

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my dad didn't believe in us going to school.

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So my dad, it was about the business, the skating

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rink and the bar. So the skating rink opened

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about seven o 'clock at night. And this is the

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time I was able to walk. So about five, you know,

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four or five, six years old, eight, nine, and

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I go to the skating rink. seven o 'clock at night

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and I worked the skating rink until 10 at night

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and then we would scrape the gum off the floors

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and we cleaned the whole skating rink up and

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then my dad had an office and my brother and

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myself would sleep in the office and my mama

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would go upstairs and work the bar until three

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o 'clock in the morning and then they cleaned

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the bar up so after all that shit was done with

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going to school rarely happened so when I went

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to school I was all kind of you know my my learning

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disability I had Social anxiety. I was just a

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jacked -up kid from living in this tortured home

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from the outside looking in we live in the all

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-white neighborhood and then we would travel

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to the ghetto of Buffalo New York with the skating

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because that So we you know, we worked around

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mostly blacks and I lived around mostly whites

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But no one knew what was going on that house

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that on 201 Paradise Road. You know, it's crazy,

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but um My mom got courage to finally leave him

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when I was about eight years old. We moved to

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a small town in Brazil, Indiana. And that's when

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the real war started for me. And Brazil, Indiana

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is a small town, great people, a lot of great

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people. And I say that because a lot of people

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get offended. And I'm going to get to the point

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where they get offended. There was about maybe

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10 black families at about 10 ,000 people in

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the town. And in 1995, the KKK marched in the

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Fourth of July parade. So this was a Not everybody

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was racist. There was a lot of good people, some

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of the best people I knew was there, but there

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was also a lot of racism there. So me being one

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of the few black kids in that, you know, in that

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area, you know, it kind of haunts you. I had

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stuff on my notebook, you know, nigga, we're

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going to kill you on my Spanish notebook. They

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had that on my car, nigga, we're going to kill

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you. This is early 90s. And so even though I

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showed it didn't hurt me, it was jacking me up.

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So all the insecurities I have when I was a kid

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with my father, I moved into this area here and

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It just got worse and worse and worse. And the

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shit haunted me. And that voice that I talked

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about, it kept talking louder and louder and

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louder. But I was doing nothing about it. And

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I decided to make moves. And I cheated all through

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school. And it's kind of humbling to talk about

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my stories sometimes. And it's also embarrassing.

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But it's real. It's who the fuck I am. It's what

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I am. It's what created me. and copy from the

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fourth grade to my junior year in high school

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on every assignment. And I want to get in the

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military. I want to join the Air Force. And the

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guy gave me an ASVAB test. It was like a watered

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down SAT. And I couldn't copy on it because the

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guy beside me had a test A. I had test B. The

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guy on my right had test C. So I looked to copy

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on this test, and I couldn't copy on it. So I

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got like a 20. And I wanted to be an Air Force

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pair of rescuemen. It's guys that jump out of

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airplanes and save down pilots. It's a special

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operator in the Air Force. And my score was so

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horribly low that I had to retake it again. And

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he said, hey, I got like an 18 the second time,

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even worse. I need to get a 50 out of a 99. And

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so my mom and I, for a while, we lived in the

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government subsidized apartments, $7 a month,

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and also food stamps. And we slowly moved up

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to a $230 a month place. But at the time, we

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were pretty poor. But my mom afforded enough

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money for me to go to see a tutor one hour a

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week. So for four hours a month, I had six months

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to study for my last test. I'd only take the

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ASRA test three times. And I studied my ass off

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and passed it. And I got in the Air Force and

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realized there was more things in front of me.

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I was afraid of the water, terrified of the water.

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I learned how to swim, but what gets everybody

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in this training, in all special ops training,

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is the water confidence, where they try to pretty

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much drown your ass. You know, all of our lives

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we've been breathing. And they take that from

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you, and they want to see how comfortable you

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are in the water. And there's only 1 % African

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Americans in special operations. And I didn't

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know anything about African, like a lot of them

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are negative buoyant, which I am, because of

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the bone density. I struggled. But I'm six weeks

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in the program. There was about 25 guys left

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out of about 150 I was there and I was never

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I didn't go to sleep for six weeks the program

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and I wanted to quit so badly, but I quit everything

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in my life. I copied through school I want to

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prove people wrong And so here I am in this Air

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Force program starting to get a little more confidence

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but this water was kicking my ass and Six weeks

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in the program. The doctor gave me a blood test.

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It was that sickle cell Sickle cell trait not

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the anemia, but it still killed people But so

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they pulled me out training for a week and when

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you go from being very uncomfortable in that

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water situation And then now you're comfortable

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and I'm sitting back watching the guys drown

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come not you know I'm not part of the activities

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anymore for this week. I Don't want to get back

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in that damn water again So the fear overcame

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me and all my insecurities for my dad from this

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small town from everything started coming back

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And even though no one knew how fucked up I was,

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to kind of create this other person who was tough,

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I lived with this shit all the time. So me not

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wanting to go back in that water, the doctor

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called me back up. I thought I was going to get

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like a medical kick out of the military. So no

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quitting for me. They'll kick me out so I can

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have some pride. The doctor said, no, man, we

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could put you back in the training. And I was

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like, fuck. But after a week, I'm like, you know

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what? I missed one week. There's only three weeks

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left. There's a good chance, you know, I could

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tough this shit out and go on. But I went back

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to the CEO and the command officer of the program

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and the sergeant said, hey, you got to start

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from day one because you missed that week of

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training. And I broke. I broke. I couldn't imagine

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going back through that again. So I made up a

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lie. And I said, man, the sickle cell thing is

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really scaring me. It was the fucking water.

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It wasn't sickle cell. And I pretty much quit,

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even though they gave me a medical. I quit. So

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from the age of 19 to the age of 22, I went into

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the job called TACP, where you control fast movers

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behind enemy lines. Cool job, but there's no

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water. I was afraid of the water, so I avoided

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it. And I gained 125 pounds in that time frame.

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I went from 175 to almost 300. To 297 was my

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heaviest. And I started finding things that was

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comfortable. And the more things I found comfortable,

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the more uncomfortable my mind was. Because that

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voice I was telling you about, it always was

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there. I was just trying to avoid that conscience.

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I wanted to be left alone from that conscience,

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and it wouldn't leave me alone. So I got out

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of the Air Force, and I started working for a

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job called EcoLab, where you spray for cockroaches

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at 24. And I'm spraying at different steak and

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shakes, red lobster, whatever, from 11 o 'clock

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at night to 7 o 'clock in the morning. And what

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changed, I came home and watched this Discovery

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Channel show, Class 224. Came home from steak

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and shake I sprayed down last get a big old large

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42 ounce shake Well across the street and get

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a box of mini doughnuts from 7 -eleven and I

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would drive home for 45 minutes This big old

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fat guy who yeah, I worked out, but I was fat.

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I didn't run didn't PT. I just hit the gym So

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I'm driving home turn the TV on and what comes

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on discovery channel. So and that's where everything

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changed for me Was taking a shower. I walked

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out heard these guys and I watched the show and

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it made me reflect Big time on the piece of shit

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that I am and I'm exactly what people said I

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was gonna be So so what was on this show that

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really struck home it was um I saw these guys

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going in the water, so I was terrified of it

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I mean I can't even express have you had a big

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fear And I know a lot of fighters have fears

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and stuff like that, but they get over them But

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a lot of us have these fears that you just don't

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want to fucking face And I have a lot of them

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had a lot of them and that's what created the

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person who's in front of you today And it will

00:11:48.950 --> 00:11:52.690
get into that But I'm just a scared bitch is

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what I was and But I was watching these guys

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going through hell week class 224 and these guys

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ringing the bell quitting dropping their helmet

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down rolling out a lot of guys just leaving and

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It made me reflect on my fears my insecurities

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And I saw real men when I thought were real men

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who were staying who are overcoming adversity,

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who are overcoming all these different things

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that I had blamed so many fucking people in my

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life, my dad, my mom for not being there. When

00:12:23.009 --> 00:12:25.970
I was 14 years old, my mom was gonna get remarried

00:12:25.970 --> 00:12:28.669
to this great guy. He got murdered. And then

00:12:28.669 --> 00:12:32.509
I moved back to a small town in Brazil and everybody

00:12:32.509 --> 00:12:35.649
was a blame. My learning disability, my skin

00:12:35.649 --> 00:12:40.139
color, me being everything. And so I sat there

00:12:40.139 --> 00:12:43.480
for a while and I was like, man, I got it. No

00:12:43.480 --> 00:12:46.080
one's going to fucking come to help me. No one's

00:12:46.080 --> 00:12:47.519
going to fucking come to help me. It's fucking

00:12:47.519 --> 00:12:51.159
me against me, period. And so I had the man up.

00:12:51.539 --> 00:12:52.940
And I said, the first thing I started doing is

00:12:52.940 --> 00:12:56.000
facing every fucking fear I have. What the fuck

00:12:56.000 --> 00:12:58.899
it is, man. And these things would keep me up.

00:12:59.080 --> 00:13:01.779
And people who are hearing this shit, they will

00:13:01.779 --> 00:13:05.299
never really understand and grasp. When you face

00:13:05.299 --> 00:13:07.240
these things and so many things how they keep

00:13:07.240 --> 00:13:09.419
you up and haunt you at night I think there's

00:13:09.419 --> 00:13:10.759
a lot of people out there that know what you're

00:13:10.759 --> 00:13:13.019
talking about. I mean and um, so that's what

00:13:13.019 --> 00:13:18.440
it did and I I had two options to either Be that

00:13:18.440 --> 00:13:20.679
300 pound guy who sprayed for cockroaches and

00:13:20.679 --> 00:13:24.259
made a thousand dollars a month And at 24 years

00:13:24.259 --> 00:13:26.840
old knowing when i'm 50 fucking years old I can

00:13:26.840 --> 00:13:29.080
reflect on this and think about what guy I never

00:13:29.080 --> 00:13:33.679
became or I can totally just sack it up and fail

00:13:33.679 --> 00:13:37.159
and fail and fail until I succeed. So I started

00:13:37.159 --> 00:13:38.899
calling recruiters up. I said, I'm gonna go be

00:13:38.899 --> 00:13:41.840
a fucking Navy SEAL. And every recruiter, so

00:13:41.840 --> 00:13:44.139
there's a weight and height, so the weight and

00:13:44.139 --> 00:13:47.240
height limit to get in the military. And I was

00:13:47.240 --> 00:13:50.840
six foot one and 297. And I had prior service,

00:13:50.840 --> 00:13:53.379
which was a big deal. So I called all these recruiters

00:13:53.379 --> 00:13:55.100
up and all of them said, hey, how tall are you?

00:13:55.320 --> 00:13:56.679
Blah, blah, blah, blah. They got into conversations

00:13:56.679 --> 00:13:59.440
to see if I was even qualified. And by the time

00:13:59.440 --> 00:14:01.710
I got to my weight, phone would hang up pretty

00:14:01.710 --> 00:14:03.549
much like, hey, you know what, call somebody

00:14:03.549 --> 00:14:05.909
else, you know, try to get in the reserves. So

00:14:05.909 --> 00:14:07.870
I try to get in the reserves and I call this

00:14:07.870 --> 00:14:09.710
guy, Steven Saljo, recruiter up and he said,

00:14:09.710 --> 00:14:12.470
Hey, come on in. He saw me, put me through the

00:14:12.470 --> 00:14:14.909
weight standard, all this other stuff. And to

00:14:14.909 --> 00:14:16.590
get into the class, I had to get into how to

00:14:16.590 --> 00:14:20.330
lose 106 pounds in less than three months. So

00:14:20.330 --> 00:14:22.929
I was like, fuck that. I can't do that. I grabbed

00:14:22.929 --> 00:14:24.769
my chocolate milkshake and went back to equal

00:14:24.769 --> 00:14:27.049
lab. I'm going back to work, man. This is my

00:14:27.049 --> 00:14:31.590
life. So in this job, you look Looking for cockroaches

00:14:31.590 --> 00:14:33.690
looking for rodents and stuff like that and this

00:14:33.690 --> 00:14:36.690
next morning or this next night I went to work

00:14:36.690 --> 00:14:40.210
and I hit the I don't like cockroaches too much.

00:14:40.210 --> 00:14:43.750
I hit the motherload of cockroaches and This

00:14:43.750 --> 00:14:46.090
restaurant got full of cockroaches and rodents

00:14:46.090 --> 00:14:48.629
and everything else and I sat there. I said this

00:14:48.629 --> 00:14:51.730
is my life. I Said this is my life. You are exactly

00:14:51.730 --> 00:14:55.830
who the fuck This is it and I said this ain't

00:14:55.830 --> 00:14:59.990
gonna be it for me so in that restaurant Quit

00:14:59.990 --> 00:15:02.789
my job left my canister in that restaurant my

00:15:02.789 --> 00:15:06.370
spray canister got back in my eco lab truck And

00:15:06.370 --> 00:15:09.529
I went home and I started working out like somebody

00:15:09.529 --> 00:15:12.990
I was I became the most obsessed person on the

00:15:12.990 --> 00:15:18.169
planet Earth and I was basically I Had to invent

00:15:18.169 --> 00:15:21.389
a guy that didn't exist I had to invent a guy

00:15:21.389 --> 00:15:23.350
that can take any pain any suffering any kind

00:15:23.350 --> 00:15:26.659
of judgment be called nigger, be called whatever

00:15:26.659 --> 00:15:28.279
the fuck in the world and be able to stand in

00:15:28.279 --> 00:15:30.320
a fucking room and say go fuck yourself. I had

00:15:30.320 --> 00:15:33.580
to build this callous mind and I built it through

00:15:33.580 --> 00:15:36.580
suffering. I built it through downright fucking

00:15:36.580 --> 00:15:38.940
just crushing myself. If it was raining outside

00:15:38.940 --> 00:15:40.019
at three o 'clock in the fucking morning, it

00:15:40.019 --> 00:15:42.919
was snowing, the first instinct is don't go out

00:15:42.919 --> 00:15:46.419
there and do shit. My instinct was we gotta fucking

00:15:46.419 --> 00:15:49.299
go out there. Anything that was fucking horrible

00:15:49.299 --> 00:15:53.100
in my life that I would normally say no, that

00:15:53.100 --> 00:15:56.340
was inhumane to most people, I had to go do it.

00:15:57.039 --> 00:15:59.440
And I started callous in my mind at this point

00:15:59.440 --> 00:16:03.100
in my life. And I lost the weight. I lost the

00:16:03.100 --> 00:16:05.240
weight. And I went back to recruiter. I got into

00:16:05.240 --> 00:16:09.120
that class. And I went through three Navy SEAL

00:16:09.120 --> 00:16:11.899
hell weeks in one year. Only guy to ever be in

00:16:11.899 --> 00:16:13.679
three hell weeks in one year, to my knowledge.

00:16:14.240 --> 00:16:15.700
The first one I didn't make it through, the next

00:16:15.700 --> 00:16:22.240
two I did. didn't I didn't stop anymore from

00:16:22.240 --> 00:16:25.000
there and I started realizing through this through

00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:29.299
this process that The fucking mind is what you

00:16:29.299 --> 00:16:31.840
created and I started opening different doors

00:16:31.840 --> 00:16:33.759
that I didn't think were even there They didn't

00:16:33.759 --> 00:16:36.279
think even existed and the more doors open up

00:16:36.279 --> 00:16:38.759
the more I start realizing that my potential

00:16:38.759 --> 00:16:42.659
is damn near endless and It changed my whole

00:16:42.659 --> 00:16:45.220
mindset. So I went from David Goggins and I created

00:16:45.220 --> 00:16:50.240
Goggins and that journey is a priceless journey

00:16:50.240 --> 00:16:51.919
that is hard for me to even explain to people

00:16:51.919 --> 00:16:54.159
because it sounds so quick and easy, like I lost

00:16:54.159 --> 00:16:56.159
this weight and I went through three hell weeks,

00:16:56.240 --> 00:16:57.720
I went to Ranger school, went to Delta Force,

00:16:57.799 --> 00:17:01.159
Lexington, whatever it is. It was brutal. It's

00:17:01.159 --> 00:17:03.360
a brutal journey every fucking day. And everybody

00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:06.819
goes, are you happy? If anybody knows my life

00:17:06.819 --> 00:17:09.000
story, I'll try to give you just a snippet of

00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:11.539
it. Where I'm at today is in front of Joe Rogan

00:17:11.539 --> 00:17:14.779
telling you my life. To get through where I became,

00:17:15.339 --> 00:17:17.690
to get through where I'm at now, There's nothing

00:17:17.690 --> 00:17:19.869
but pride I have for myself that I can't really,

00:17:20.069 --> 00:17:22.269
I can't really show people. Because I have this

00:17:22.269 --> 00:17:24.670
face, I have this face that they see like, are

00:17:24.670 --> 00:17:26.970
you happy? What's wrong with you? I'm driven.

00:17:27.750 --> 00:17:30.670
I'm obsessed. And that's what you see. That's

00:17:30.670 --> 00:17:33.970
it. People need to hear this story. This is a,

00:17:33.970 --> 00:17:35.970
this is an exciting story for people because

00:17:35.970 --> 00:17:37.710
there's a lot of people out there that feel trapped

00:17:37.710 --> 00:17:39.670
and they feel stuck and they feel like they can't

00:17:39.670 --> 00:17:42.369
do anything. This is who they are. You're a guy

00:17:42.369 --> 00:17:45.589
who felt that exact same way, but figured out.

00:17:45.720 --> 00:17:48.359
How to not be that person and be a person that

00:17:48.359 --> 00:17:51.559
you would admire How did you what were the first

00:17:51.559 --> 00:17:54.619
steps? Like you had some slips before right because

00:17:54.619 --> 00:17:56.720
you you quit because of the water thing Right,

00:17:56.720 --> 00:17:58.380
but then when you went back the second time you

00:17:58.380 --> 00:17:59.880
decided you're gonna lose all that weight and

00:17:59.880 --> 00:18:03.759
you quit that job Did did you was it just straightforward

00:18:03.759 --> 00:18:05.859
from there or were there some days where you

00:18:05.859 --> 00:18:08.660
just failed? And then you picked it back up again.

00:18:08.680 --> 00:18:11.299
So my first run when I decided to lose the weight

00:18:11.299 --> 00:18:15.279
I was like I said 297 I was about 32 body fat

00:18:16.180 --> 00:18:19.660
And I went, my idea was to run four miles for

00:18:19.660 --> 00:18:21.920
my first run. I didn't know how bad it's gonna

00:18:21.920 --> 00:18:23.920
fucking hurt me. I used to run before I was fat

00:18:23.920 --> 00:18:26.160
and I was like, fuck it, I can do this. I ran

00:18:26.160 --> 00:18:28.960
a quarter mile and walked home. I walked home

00:18:28.960 --> 00:18:31.720
and sat on my couch and cried. I went to my mom's

00:18:31.720 --> 00:18:34.700
house, who was about 40, about maybe 20 minutes

00:18:34.700 --> 00:18:36.200
down the road and cried and getting her couch

00:18:36.200 --> 00:18:37.740
saying, man, I can't fucking do this shit. I

00:18:37.740 --> 00:18:41.339
don't know what I'm gonna do. I just got somebody

00:18:41.339 --> 00:18:43.869
pregnant. My life was just fucked. I was making

00:18:43.869 --> 00:18:46.549
$1 ,000 a month. My rent was $8, $10 a month.

00:18:47.029 --> 00:18:49.690
And my mind just kept fucking with me. And kept

00:18:49.690 --> 00:18:51.170
fucking, you're not good enough, man. This isn't

00:18:51.170 --> 00:18:52.890
for you, man. These guys are the baddest motherfuckers

00:18:52.890 --> 00:18:57.690
on the planet Earth. You're not that. And what

00:18:57.690 --> 00:19:00.329
it was, and it's kind of funny, I was obsessed

00:19:00.329 --> 00:19:06.549
with Rocky. Rocky I, in particular. And when

00:19:06.549 --> 00:19:08.309
I was a kid, I'd come home every day and I'd

00:19:08.309 --> 00:19:10.900
watch this fucking show, Rocky. And I would fast

00:19:10.900 --> 00:19:15.140
forward with the little VHS tapes to round 14.

00:19:15.880 --> 00:19:18.599
Round 14 fucked me up like nobody's business.

00:19:18.980 --> 00:19:21.279
Why? The song came on, right? So when I bought

00:19:21.279 --> 00:19:22.920
the pull -up record, I listened to the song for

00:19:22.920 --> 00:19:26.940
17 hours. It's two minutes and 13 seconds. And

00:19:26.940 --> 00:19:32.500
I'm able to visualize and dream like nobody's

00:19:32.500 --> 00:19:35.200
business. And I know that I can create a vision

00:19:35.200 --> 00:19:38.369
that many people can't. And I worked for it,

00:19:38.369 --> 00:19:41.130
so the vision I had was when Apollo Cree beat

00:19:41.130 --> 00:19:43.490
the fucking shit out of Rocky, beat the shit

00:19:43.490 --> 00:19:47.289
out of him, he kept fighting. He was a dumb fighter,

00:19:47.730 --> 00:19:49.490
couldn't read, couldn't fuck, that was me. Couldn't

00:19:49.490 --> 00:19:52.690
read, couldn't write, just punchy, everything

00:19:52.690 --> 00:19:55.450
about him. And Rocky beat the shit, or Apollo

00:19:55.450 --> 00:19:56.569
beat the shit out of him. He was in that corner,

00:19:56.630 --> 00:19:59.990
everybody was saying, stay the fuck down. And

00:19:59.990 --> 00:20:03.549
him getting up, him getting up, Apollo Cree raised

00:20:03.549 --> 00:20:04.849
his arms up in the fucking air, turned around,

00:20:04.930 --> 00:20:07.430
thought he wanted to fight. He turns around and

00:20:07.430 --> 00:20:09.930
sees this guy getting up, and it was the face

00:20:09.930 --> 00:20:13.390
of Apollo Creed that changed my life. The face

00:20:13.390 --> 00:20:16.109
of Apollo Creed. It was like, just by that motherfucker

00:20:16.109 --> 00:20:19.789
getting up. Not winning. Just by him getting

00:20:19.789 --> 00:20:23.049
the fuck up. Apollo Creed was his champ. He was

00:20:23.049 --> 00:20:27.289
the best. Rocky had taken his soul. Had literally

00:20:27.289 --> 00:20:29.769
taken his soul. His head goes down. He looks

00:20:29.769 --> 00:20:33.190
at him like, what the fuck are you? I wanted

00:20:33.190 --> 00:20:36.740
to be that. Not Rocky. Want to be the guy that

00:20:36.740 --> 00:20:38.359
people looked at I don't keep you like me or

00:20:38.359 --> 00:20:40.859
didn't like I don't care But said this motherfucker

00:20:40.859 --> 00:20:44.420
is gonna keep coming after Whatever the fuck

00:20:44.420 --> 00:20:48.000
is in front of them. I wanted that I wanted that

00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:50.819
I wanted that worse than anything in the world

00:20:50.819 --> 00:20:56.960
So that is I kept picturing me Falling down and

00:20:56.960 --> 00:20:58.759
getting up and every motherfucker to call me

00:20:58.759 --> 00:21:02.420
nigger. I was dumped even myself even myself

00:21:02.700 --> 00:21:05.720
I wanted to feel something besides the feet.

00:21:06.619 --> 00:21:09.559
I wanted to just go the distance. And that going

00:21:09.559 --> 00:21:12.920
the distance pushed me to a point of where now

00:21:12.920 --> 00:21:16.200
I go way past the distance. So you go the first

00:21:16.200 --> 00:21:18.640
day, you run a quarter mile and then you walk

00:21:18.640 --> 00:21:21.779
back home and you're upset. How do you move forward?

00:21:22.039 --> 00:21:25.559
So basically what I did was I came home and I

00:21:25.559 --> 00:21:28.400
had a tucking milkshake. I sat down and I gave

00:21:28.400 --> 00:21:30.640
up. I said this ain't gonna fucking happen, man.

00:21:30.640 --> 00:21:32.500
I could lose 106 pounds and I can't even go a

00:21:32.500 --> 00:21:38.420
quarter of a fucking mile. I started being able

00:21:38.420 --> 00:21:43.680
to take negative shit and be happy. And this

00:21:43.680 --> 00:21:46.539
whole, I say what if a lot, it sounds corny and

00:21:46.539 --> 00:21:50.559
it sounds weak, but it's true. One of the recruiters

00:21:50.559 --> 00:21:52.539
said, there's not many black Navy SEALs. Matter

00:21:52.539 --> 00:21:54.400
of fact, I was the 36th African American SEAL

00:21:54.400 --> 00:21:58.420
in history. Over seven years. Because the fucking

00:21:58.420 --> 00:22:00.599
water, you know, I mean people get mad at me.

00:22:00.599 --> 00:22:05.660
It's fucking true. Just get over it and so I

00:22:05.660 --> 00:22:09.200
was like Matt What story would it be if my fucking

00:22:09.200 --> 00:22:13.960
fat dumb? Lying to be friends with people insecure

00:22:13.960 --> 00:22:18.380
ass can overcome this shit and that what -if

00:22:18.380 --> 00:22:21.460
mentality like That that that dreamer mentality

00:22:21.460 --> 00:22:24.380
just would always fuel me. It was true man. What

00:22:24.380 --> 00:22:27.700
if I can be what if I can be a seal man? What

00:22:27.700 --> 00:22:29.519
if I can go from one and a quarter of a fucking

00:22:29.519 --> 00:22:34.099
mile? Now I run 205 miles. What if I can go?

00:22:34.440 --> 00:22:37.079
Just what if I can go? And what if, how would

00:22:37.079 --> 00:22:39.279
that feel if I'm graduating? Can I not forget

00:22:39.279 --> 00:22:40.880
at that graduation thing I was talking about,

00:22:40.900 --> 00:22:44.099
224, like the video I sat down and watched. This

00:22:44.099 --> 00:22:46.680
command officer stood up and he said to the graduation

00:22:46.680 --> 00:22:49.599
guys who are graduating buds, like 18 of them,

00:22:50.000 --> 00:22:51.920
he said, we live in a society where mediocrity

00:22:51.920 --> 00:22:54.500
is often rewarded. And he went on to say something

00:22:54.500 --> 00:22:59.059
about these men detest mediocrity. And I wanted

00:22:59.059 --> 00:23:01.900
to be a man that the test mediocrity You know

00:23:01.900 --> 00:23:04.680
it got me a lot of trouble in the seal teams

00:23:04.680 --> 00:23:07.039
and going forward in my life because I just I

00:23:07.039 --> 00:23:08.960
started looking down on people for not going

00:23:08.960 --> 00:23:12.539
hard as fucking shit and I started to create

00:23:12.539 --> 00:23:13.839
different things, but that's for a different

00:23:13.839 --> 00:23:16.660
day But I just believe that you know my whole

00:23:16.660 --> 00:23:18.920
mind changed That is a problem that a lot of

00:23:18.920 --> 00:23:21.480
people who work hard do have you get angry at

00:23:21.480 --> 00:23:23.759
people who don't work hard to the point where

00:23:23.759 --> 00:23:26.099
you you know you want to insult them you want

00:23:26.099 --> 00:23:28.950
to You want to smack them. And it's really because

00:23:28.950 --> 00:23:31.029
you're scared of seeing that in yourself. Yeah,

00:23:31.369 --> 00:23:33.390
that's probably the truth. That's probably the

00:23:33.390 --> 00:23:36.349
truth. So I guess a lot of times in my life,

00:23:36.349 --> 00:23:38.730
I would see people and it probably was a direct

00:23:38.730 --> 00:23:41.650
reflection of who I was. And I would get mad

00:23:41.650 --> 00:23:43.130
at them, but in reflection, it's probably just

00:23:43.130 --> 00:23:45.230
me getting mad at myself. Yeah, that's for me

00:23:45.230 --> 00:23:47.710
100%. When I see people that are half -assed

00:23:47.710 --> 00:23:49.869
and things, I get terrified of seeing that in

00:23:49.869 --> 00:23:53.769
myself and I get mad at them. Right. And it's

00:23:53.769 --> 00:23:55.930
not a good way to handle it. No, you know, but

00:23:55.930 --> 00:23:57.950
it's it's natural because you're just terrified

00:23:57.950 --> 00:24:00.809
of seeing that trait right and it cost me so

00:24:00.809 --> 00:24:04.430
you come back You do the quarter mile right you

00:24:04.430 --> 00:24:07.049
walk back home. How do you regroup? So what I

00:24:07.049 --> 00:24:10.210
did I sat down there and I put rocky in I Got

00:24:10.210 --> 00:24:12.390
my milkshake put rocky. I see know what I was

00:24:12.390 --> 00:24:16.470
big time in rocky and platoon Why platoon? I

00:24:16.470 --> 00:24:19.490
love to see people who were getting beat down

00:24:19.490 --> 00:24:22.170
and this there's there's scenes There's scenes

00:24:22.170 --> 00:24:24.450
that just drove me and people in my hell weeks,

00:24:24.589 --> 00:24:26.410
you know, I was in three of them. They'd always

00:24:26.410 --> 00:24:29.230
hear me singing these songs, these songs, humming

00:24:29.230 --> 00:24:31.950
these songs in torturous situations. When you're,

00:24:32.069 --> 00:24:33.730
when everybody's quitting this fucking code,

00:24:34.009 --> 00:24:37.869
I would be somewhere gone, somewhere fucking

00:24:37.869 --> 00:24:40.269
gone and somewhere fucking dark as shit. There's

00:24:40.269 --> 00:24:43.029
a scene of platoon when Elias, when Barnes shoots

00:24:43.029 --> 00:24:46.210
Elias and you know, they think Elias is dead.

00:24:46.950 --> 00:24:49.750
The choppers are taking off and Charlie Sheen

00:24:49.750 --> 00:24:53.130
is asking, you know, Tom Berenger. Where's Elias?

00:24:53.250 --> 00:24:55.650
Where's Elias? William Dafoe? Oh, I found him

00:24:55.650 --> 00:24:59.250
back there dead somewhere and Through the woods

00:24:59.250 --> 00:25:01.349
the Vietcong is chasing Elias through the woods

00:25:01.349 --> 00:25:03.269
and then shoot him in his fucking back And all

00:25:03.269 --> 00:25:04.930
he wants to do is get to the fucking chopper.

00:25:04.970 --> 00:25:06.430
He's getting shot in his back. He's getting up

00:25:06.430 --> 00:25:08.410
He's getting shot in the base getting up and

00:25:08.410 --> 00:25:11.430
you see this guy just fighting I love the fucking

00:25:11.430 --> 00:25:14.549
guy who just fucking fights. And so I put these

00:25:14.549 --> 00:25:17.170
things in as reminders that you're gonna have

00:25:17.170 --> 00:25:21.130
to fucking suffer, man. This fucking .25, man,

00:25:21.130 --> 00:25:23.690
this is... Man, you're gonna have to fucking

00:25:23.690 --> 00:25:28.730
suffer to go from this fat insecure motherfucker

00:25:28.730 --> 00:25:30.490
to one of the best guys on the planet Earth.

00:25:31.109 --> 00:25:33.410
This journey is gonna take something that is

00:25:33.410 --> 00:25:37.069
gonna be incomprehensible to most people. And

00:25:37.069 --> 00:25:40.759
these different visualizations how I visualize

00:25:40.759 --> 00:25:43.619
them in my self -talk, it became so nasty and

00:25:43.619 --> 00:25:46.180
dirty that I almost liked the fact that I went

00:25:46.180 --> 00:25:50.460
.25. So it became from being defeated to like,

00:25:50.619 --> 00:25:52.700
man, all right, motherfucker, maybe tomorrow

00:25:52.700 --> 00:25:56.579
I'm going to go .75. It just became this different

00:25:56.579 --> 00:25:59.279
mindset. I turned negatives into positives. So

00:25:59.279 --> 00:26:01.599
I would take it like, who would even think about

00:26:01.599 --> 00:26:03.180
doing this? So I would sit on my couch saying,

00:26:03.599 --> 00:26:06.440
who at 297, who can't fucking swim that great,

00:26:06.599 --> 00:26:08.440
who's scared of the fucking water, would have

00:26:08.440 --> 00:26:11.319
the fucking balls, who have the balls to fucking

00:26:11.319 --> 00:26:15.099
man up, quit a job, and go, and to put everything

00:26:15.099 --> 00:26:18.960
on himself? So it's how I start talking to myself,

00:26:19.319 --> 00:26:20.920
and put myself in a whole different category,

00:26:20.940 --> 00:26:22.539
and that would fuel me the next day, and I just

00:26:22.539 --> 00:26:25.220
kept using that as fuel, and fuel. No one would

00:26:25.220 --> 00:26:27.299
do this shit. No one would do this shit. You're

00:26:27.299 --> 00:26:28.980
the baddest motherfucker around. You're the baddest

00:26:28.980 --> 00:26:31.420
motherfucker that ever lived. And I just kept

00:26:31.420 --> 00:26:34.500
fueling me with the right kind of message that

00:26:34.500 --> 00:26:36.400
I needed to hear that I was never telling myself.

00:26:36.900 --> 00:26:41.440
And through time, it became reality to myself.

00:26:42.359 --> 00:26:45.880
So you start out on the first day, and then do

00:26:45.880 --> 00:26:47.599
you start running again the second day? Yeah,

00:26:47.599 --> 00:26:48.980
the second day, we're right back after it again.

00:26:49.380 --> 00:26:51.920
But I start realizing I can't run that far. So

00:26:51.920 --> 00:26:54.470
what I did was I became damn near professional

00:26:54.470 --> 00:26:57.190
cyclist with the miles I put on the bike. So

00:26:57.190 --> 00:27:01.049
I never, whenever I watched TV, I had to be doing

00:27:01.049 --> 00:27:03.329
something. So I was riding the bike. I rode a

00:27:03.329 --> 00:27:06.329
bike a lot to lose the first initial kind of

00:27:06.329 --> 00:27:08.630
weight because my bones were just hurting so

00:27:08.630 --> 00:27:10.670
bad. My body was just broken. And I learned to

00:27:10.670 --> 00:27:12.809
get over that also. And I tried to swim a lot.

00:27:12.930 --> 00:27:14.890
I wasn't a great swimmer, but putting fins on

00:27:14.890 --> 00:27:16.950
kind of equalized my body. I wasn't so negative

00:27:16.950 --> 00:27:19.910
boy. So I started fitting a whole bunch and I

00:27:19.910 --> 00:27:22.819
spent hours in the pool. Hours in the pool trying

00:27:22.819 --> 00:27:24.259
to get more and more comfortable not because

00:27:24.259 --> 00:27:26.519
I was going underwater I was so scared of the

00:27:26.519 --> 00:27:29.579
water that I had to live in the water I had to

00:27:29.579 --> 00:27:32.759
become one with the water. So going to the pool

00:27:32.759 --> 00:27:36.259
used to scare me So I went to the pool an awful

00:27:36.259 --> 00:27:40.480
awful lot and then the bike got easier I was

00:27:40.480 --> 00:27:43.900
able to run more I went from like one mile one

00:27:43.900 --> 00:27:46.400
mile is a great accomplishment two miles and

00:27:46.400 --> 00:27:48.559
then from two to three was a big one then I went

00:27:48.559 --> 00:27:51.880
from three to six and then Like they have a warning

00:27:51.880 --> 00:27:53.599
order that they give people to get ready for

00:27:53.599 --> 00:27:56.019
buds. And the whole thing was running six miles,

00:27:56.079 --> 00:27:59.380
five days a week. And that was my goal. And so

00:27:59.380 --> 00:28:02.480
I just kept, I failed. I go back to scratch.

00:28:02.960 --> 00:28:05.380
I use some positive motivation. I have like one

00:28:05.380 --> 00:28:07.859
day where I'm like fucking defeated. But I started

00:28:07.859 --> 00:28:09.440
realizing this is part of the process. This is

00:28:09.440 --> 00:28:11.279
part of the journey. I had to realize this is

00:28:11.279 --> 00:28:14.200
part of my process versus just saying, like I

00:28:14.200 --> 00:28:16.579
used to, I'm just not good enough. If I'm not

00:28:16.579 --> 00:28:18.319
good enough, we always say that shit. I'm just

00:28:18.319 --> 00:28:19.740
not good enough. And then we try something else.

00:28:20.140 --> 00:28:22.680
I'm gonna fucking make myself good enough. And

00:28:22.680 --> 00:28:25.279
that became my mentality. I'm gonna make myself

00:28:25.279 --> 00:28:29.140
good enough. And so I misunderstood a lot, but

00:28:29.140 --> 00:28:32.079
that's all it came down to. I made myself good

00:28:32.079 --> 00:28:35.119
enough. And the days I couldn't run that far,

00:28:35.420 --> 00:28:39.900
the next week, I would do two a days. So on the

00:28:39.900 --> 00:28:42.980
running, if I ran a quarter of a mile, I wait

00:28:42.980 --> 00:28:44.700
a fucking couple of hours, it haunt me, bother

00:28:44.700 --> 00:28:46.759
me, I try to run a half a mile the next time.

00:28:46.900 --> 00:28:50.289
Same day. You can do more than this. If I had

00:28:50.289 --> 00:28:52.130
to walk, I had to walk. It just became just a

00:28:52.130 --> 00:28:54.950
process of grinding and grinding. And grinding

00:28:54.950 --> 00:28:57.130
is not even a good word for it. It's not even

00:28:57.130 --> 00:29:00.970
a good word for it. And just going further and

00:29:00.970 --> 00:29:02.309
further. And then when I got through running,

00:29:02.670 --> 00:29:05.289
I go to the bike. I go to the pool. If I got

00:29:05.289 --> 00:29:08.089
tired somewhere, my legs are tired, I go to the

00:29:08.089 --> 00:29:10.450
gym. And I developed this crazy workout where

00:29:10.450 --> 00:29:15.150
I was doing volume. two, three hundred reps of

00:29:15.150 --> 00:29:17.170
like very light weight. People always say, you

00:29:17.170 --> 00:29:18.490
know, how come you don't have any like loose

00:29:18.490 --> 00:29:21.670
skin? My workout routine in the gym became sick.

00:29:22.190 --> 00:29:24.289
It became sick. I was just doing two, three hundred

00:29:24.289 --> 00:29:26.950
reps, four hundred reps on like chest. Just like

00:29:26.950 --> 00:29:31.809
for one simple exercise. The bench press. And

00:29:31.809 --> 00:29:34.190
I rack it, get back on it, just rep it out. Trying

00:29:34.190 --> 00:29:35.710
to burn as many calories as I can, build that

00:29:35.710 --> 00:29:38.809
muscle mass. And I just became, just became obsessed

00:29:38.809 --> 00:29:41.309
with it. So when you're doing this are you worried

00:29:41.309 --> 00:29:43.990
at all about repetitive stress injuries or the

00:29:43.990 --> 00:29:45.589
fact that your body's not conditioned for this?

00:29:45.769 --> 00:29:47.470
And you you're basically taking your body where

00:29:47.470 --> 00:29:49.990
you had abused it right and now you're you're

00:29:49.990 --> 00:29:52.509
Forcing it to live like an elite athlete, right?

00:29:52.789 --> 00:29:55.150
I didn't care. I didn't know any better. I didn't

00:29:55.150 --> 00:29:58.049
think about it Wow, I didn't I I didn't know

00:29:58.049 --> 00:30:01.029
That working out that hard, but fuck you up.

00:30:01.029 --> 00:30:03.230
I did it. Fuck you up. Oh, yeah Yeah, that's

00:30:03.230 --> 00:30:04.369
one reason why I'm with you three hell weeks.

00:30:04.369 --> 00:30:08.390
So I Don't talk about a lot but um the stress

00:30:08.390 --> 00:30:11.789
of my life getting to 24 caused me to have some

00:30:11.789 --> 00:30:13.690
serious psoas issues. I didn't know anything

00:30:13.690 --> 00:30:16.049
about this shit. The psoas muscle is what we

00:30:16.049 --> 00:30:18.390
use. It's your hip flexor muscle. And basically

00:30:18.390 --> 00:30:21.650
under stress, it starts to tighten up. And I

00:30:21.650 --> 00:30:24.569
stuttered from the time I was in third grade,

00:30:24.670 --> 00:30:26.230
the time I was in seventh grade, white blotches

00:30:26.230 --> 00:30:30.769
on my skin. I was a nutcase. And so the insides

00:30:30.769 --> 00:30:34.329
of me are also getting fucked up. So in this

00:30:34.329 --> 00:30:38.150
process, My so as muscle got real tight to my

00:30:38.150 --> 00:30:41.029
t12 I can show you the bump in the back of my

00:30:41.029 --> 00:30:43.670
head after this shows over But I had I started

00:30:43.670 --> 00:30:46.190
growing this fucking like large tumor looking

00:30:46.190 --> 00:30:49.349
bump on the back of my head from my body compressing

00:30:49.349 --> 00:30:51.089
So I'm six foot one, but my muscles were like

00:30:51.089 --> 00:30:54.170
five foot nine because I just started just the

00:30:54.170 --> 00:30:57.589
muscle tightness for my so as Going to my t12.

00:30:57.609 --> 00:30:59.809
I was just getting tighter my quads everything

00:30:59.809 --> 00:31:02.630
getting tired from distress just stress in my

00:31:02.630 --> 00:31:05.970
life So the more I stress my body with the workouts,

00:31:06.730 --> 00:31:10.150
my lower body became out of balance. So I had

00:31:10.150 --> 00:31:12.250
a bunch of stress fractures, a bunch of injuries

00:31:12.250 --> 00:31:15.549
going through buds. And how I got through buds

00:31:15.549 --> 00:31:18.309
was they gave me my third time, was my last time

00:31:18.309 --> 00:31:21.109
going through hell week. I basically put a black

00:31:21.109 --> 00:31:23.210
sock on at four o 'clock in the morning and I

00:31:23.210 --> 00:31:26.190
would get duct taped. I had numerous stress fractures

00:31:26.190 --> 00:31:28.549
on both of my legs because my because my body

00:31:28.549 --> 00:31:31.710
was literally like coming in on itself. And my

00:31:31.710 --> 00:31:34.269
legs were like, I was pronating it really bad

00:31:34.269 --> 00:31:37.910
and putting stress on my shins. And so I would

00:31:37.910 --> 00:31:40.089
put duct tape. I would duct tape my feet and

00:31:40.089 --> 00:31:41.490
I would show you the top of them where I have

00:31:41.490 --> 00:31:43.970
pressure ulcers that are the size of quarters

00:31:43.970 --> 00:31:47.269
from, you know, how the ankle joint, so the foot

00:31:47.269 --> 00:31:50.710
goes to the shin and how you move this. Where

00:31:50.710 --> 00:31:53.849
the tape was so tight, it just created a nice

00:31:53.849 --> 00:31:59.039
ulcer right there. Just just kept going through

00:31:59.039 --> 00:32:01.119
it. So you just use that tape to just support

00:32:01.119 --> 00:32:03.740
your ankles, right? So I basically cast myself

00:32:03.740 --> 00:32:06.200
and for the first 30 45 minutes the pain was

00:32:06.200 --> 00:32:10.420
excruciating But then it would go numb and I

00:32:10.420 --> 00:32:12.839
would go numb and then that's how I got through

00:32:12.839 --> 00:32:17.599
Wow Did that do any long -term damage? Oh Yeah,

00:32:17.599 --> 00:32:20.779
I've been out for five years. So I retired from

00:32:20.779 --> 00:32:22.359
them. I did 21 years in the military I did time

00:32:22.359 --> 00:32:24.480
in the Air Force and I did about 16 years in

00:32:24.480 --> 00:32:28.099
the Navy told you 43 She looks like you're 30.

00:32:28.180 --> 00:32:30.180
That's good. That's good. You really you look

00:32:30.180 --> 00:32:32.359
very young for your age whenever I'm stressed

00:32:32.359 --> 00:32:36.440
I get after it I Fixed was ever bothering me

00:32:36.440 --> 00:32:41.500
so I Basically over the last five years everything

00:32:41.500 --> 00:32:43.819
I've done in my life. I did it being very unhealthy

00:32:43.819 --> 00:32:46.779
I've never talked about it. I just kept going

00:32:47.720 --> 00:32:50.200
And it cost me pretty much, I was choking my

00:32:50.200 --> 00:32:52.619
insides out. Adrenal issues, tons of adrenal

00:32:52.619 --> 00:32:55.339
issues, thyroid issues, anything with endocrine

00:32:55.339 --> 00:32:58.500
system pretty much shut down on me. My organs

00:32:58.500 --> 00:33:00.460
were pretty much shutting down. And I went from

00:33:00.460 --> 00:33:02.599
a guy who could run 205 miles to a guy who couldn't

00:33:02.599 --> 00:33:04.859
get out of bed. And the doctors were trying to

00:33:04.859 --> 00:33:06.240
search what was wrong. That's why I figured out

00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:09.420
the psoas muscle. No one figured it out. And

00:33:09.420 --> 00:33:13.900
I hit it by accident. So I've missed two days

00:33:13.900 --> 00:33:17.420
of stretching out in five years. What happened

00:33:17.420 --> 00:33:19.400
was all the shit I did to myself, the stress

00:33:19.400 --> 00:33:22.240
I was under, physical, mental, all kind of shit,

00:33:22.799 --> 00:33:26.759
it just choked me out from the inside and doctors

00:33:26.759 --> 00:33:29.059
put me on all kind of medication. And the medication

00:33:29.059 --> 00:33:30.619
started doing the exact opposite of what it should.

00:33:30.619 --> 00:33:35.359
What kind of shit? I was on DHEA, I was on some

00:33:35.359 --> 00:33:38.359
different things for my estrogen, different things

00:33:38.359 --> 00:33:43.259
for my... I was on anything to do with your endocrine

00:33:43.259 --> 00:33:48.160
system. Thyroid medicine, Good God, I was on

00:33:48.160 --> 00:33:51.740
cortisol, all kind of shit to get my stuff. I

00:33:51.740 --> 00:33:54.000
had like this lump in my throat from like the

00:33:54.000 --> 00:33:56.500
heart was always, I couldn't run down the street.

00:33:57.099 --> 00:33:59.359
My body was just jacked up, couldn't sleep. My

00:33:59.359 --> 00:34:01.579
whole body was just down, shutting down. I could

00:34:01.579 --> 00:34:02.740
give you a lot more than that, but just to give

00:34:02.740 --> 00:34:05.920
you an example, I was fucking dying. And so I

00:34:05.920 --> 00:34:07.859
couldn't do anything. I went from a guy who was

00:34:07.859 --> 00:34:10.619
this guy to a guy who can't do shit. And doctors

00:34:10.619 --> 00:34:11.679
like, I don't know what's wrong with you, man.

00:34:12.300 --> 00:34:15.320
Is it your labs or this? Is it PTSD? What's going

00:34:15.320 --> 00:34:18.599
on? I knew it wasn't any of that shit. So I sat

00:34:18.599 --> 00:34:20.420
in the bed one day and I realized, man, my life

00:34:20.420 --> 00:34:23.840
is over. This is it. But it gave me time to reflect

00:34:23.840 --> 00:34:26.159
on everything I had accomplished. I had never

00:34:26.159 --> 00:34:30.260
taken time to reflect on the kid I was to the

00:34:30.260 --> 00:34:32.739
man I am now. So honestly, the time I wasn't

00:34:32.739 --> 00:34:35.239
working out, it was the best time of my life

00:34:35.239 --> 00:34:36.900
because I got a chance to really reflect back

00:34:36.900 --> 00:34:39.840
and be proud of who I became. I never took time

00:34:39.840 --> 00:34:42.730
to do that. It was like one after another get

00:34:42.730 --> 00:34:44.769
the fuck after get after get after you ain't

00:34:44.769 --> 00:34:47.329
good enough my fuck get after it get after it

00:34:47.329 --> 00:34:51.690
and um I got halted So anyway this process went

00:34:51.690 --> 00:34:53.489
on for a while more medication. This isn't working.

00:34:53.510 --> 00:34:56.070
That's not working. No doctor can figure it out

00:34:56.070 --> 00:35:00.010
I'm like fuck it. I saw this doc about eight

00:35:00.010 --> 00:35:02.210
years before this happened. He was like, hey

00:35:02.210 --> 00:35:04.489
man, you're so fucking tight I've never seen

00:35:04.489 --> 00:35:07.610
anybody in my life as tight as you you need 50

00:35:07.610 --> 00:35:09.809
,000 hours of stretching. He's throughout some

00:35:09.849 --> 00:35:13.269
Crazy number I Like whatever stretching, you

00:35:13.269 --> 00:35:16.489
know stretch stretch is bad for you. So you thought

00:35:16.489 --> 00:35:19.030
stretch was bad for you Why'd you think that

00:35:19.030 --> 00:35:21.309
I read some article, you know, you know, you

00:35:21.309 --> 00:35:23.889
know, man fucking fuck stretching man, you know

00:35:23.889 --> 00:35:26.190
I worked out so hard. I'd have time to stress

00:35:26.190 --> 00:35:28.809
mouse. I was running 150 miles a week I was back

00:35:28.809 --> 00:35:30.449
in the work mouse. I was getting after it man.

00:35:30.449 --> 00:35:33.710
I was working a full -time job and Stretching

00:35:33.710 --> 00:35:36.389
and doing that So my body was literally getting

00:35:36.389 --> 00:35:38.050
tighter and tighter, not just from what I was

00:35:38.050 --> 00:35:39.190
doing. Everybody thinks, oh, because you ran

00:35:39.190 --> 00:35:42.750
this. No, it wasn't that, man. And so I said,

00:35:42.809 --> 00:35:45.250
no, I'm going to try and stretch out. So I don't

00:35:45.250 --> 00:35:48.690
do anything for like 10 minutes, or I don't do

00:35:48.690 --> 00:35:51.190
no six minute abs bullshit. So I started stretching

00:35:51.190 --> 00:35:54.469
out, one hour, hour and a half. Long story short,

00:35:54.650 --> 00:35:57.130
man, I shaved my head almost every morning. And

00:35:57.130 --> 00:35:59.170
that bump, that was on the back of my fucking

00:35:59.170 --> 00:36:01.260
head, I started realizing it was shrinking. For

00:36:01.260 --> 00:36:03.199
some fucking reason I don't know why because

00:36:03.199 --> 00:36:05.500
I shaved my head back and I was like it's getting

00:36:05.500 --> 00:36:09.480
smaller Smaller that bump got healthier. I got

00:36:09.480 --> 00:36:11.519
Smaller that bump got I was like, oh hold up

00:36:11.519 --> 00:36:14.260
motherfucker. What's going on? That's so as muscle

00:36:14.260 --> 00:36:15.940
started getting more and more stressed out more

00:36:15.940 --> 00:36:18.400
more relaxed and over a period of five years

00:36:18.400 --> 00:36:20.940
I'm the best shape my damn life right now from

00:36:20.940 --> 00:36:24.139
stretching out Wow, that's all it was I went

00:36:24.139 --> 00:36:26.500
from like I came and count the medications I

00:36:26.500 --> 00:36:30.300
was on now I'm on a very low -dose thyroid pill

00:36:30.960 --> 00:36:34.719
Period do you ever do yoga all the time man all

00:36:34.719 --> 00:36:37.840
the time and I? If I were to tell somebody one

00:36:37.840 --> 00:36:41.039
thing right now, man That's so as muscle and

00:36:41.039 --> 00:36:43.539
getting that hip flexor opened up because we're

00:36:43.539 --> 00:36:46.320
all stressed the fuck out It was it's a much

00:36:46.320 --> 00:36:50.139
worse than others. It changed my life Yeah, um,

00:36:50.340 --> 00:36:52.559
how do you say Nick Gregor Gordius? How do you

00:36:52.559 --> 00:36:55.420
say his last name the? Brazilian jiu -jitsu black

00:36:55.420 --> 00:36:59.570
belt from England Greek fella he has a great

00:36:59.570 --> 00:37:02.570
quote about yoga He said yoga is a martial art

00:37:02.570 --> 00:37:05.389
you do against yourself. Yep It's a great way

00:37:05.389 --> 00:37:06.869
of putting it a hundred percent. It's what it

00:37:06.869 --> 00:37:08.429
feels like when you're in there right hundred

00:37:08.429 --> 00:37:13.650
percent and so you How many years ago was this

00:37:13.650 --> 00:37:15.690
was five years ago? We couldn't do anything and

00:37:15.690 --> 00:37:17.409
how long was there a period where you couldn't

00:37:17.409 --> 00:37:20.460
work out at all there was about So I always try

00:37:20.460 --> 00:37:22.340
to do something, but I couldn't run hardly at

00:37:22.340 --> 00:37:25.440
all. I could run maybe half a mile, and all that

00:37:25.440 --> 00:37:27.280
heart shit would happen, and my heart would get

00:37:27.280 --> 00:37:29.639
afib, and all kind of stuff would happen. And

00:37:29.639 --> 00:37:31.559
I started just stretching, and also I tried to

00:37:31.559 --> 00:37:33.719
do pull -ups every now and then, but everything

00:37:33.719 --> 00:37:36.570
was just, I didn't have the energy. Didn't have

00:37:36.570 --> 00:37:38.590
anything. I mean nothing was processing right

00:37:38.590 --> 00:37:41.070
for me. So did you think that you had just broken

00:37:41.070 --> 00:37:43.190
your body? Oh, yeah pushed it too hard hundred

00:37:43.190 --> 00:37:46.690
percent I I sat back in that bed that night and

00:37:46.690 --> 00:37:48.409
I had a lot of time to reflect I see no what

00:37:48.409 --> 00:37:50.829
I was actually kind of proud of myself in a very

00:37:50.829 --> 00:37:54.630
sick twisted way I I Even though people don't

00:37:54.630 --> 00:37:57.889
understand it. I had to do what I had to do and

00:37:57.889 --> 00:38:00.650
You know and I did it like I didn't tell you

00:38:00.650 --> 00:38:02.730
how I got into ultra running You know, there's

00:38:02.730 --> 00:38:06.980
a lot of things that so I pushed it extremely

00:38:06.980 --> 00:38:10.860
hard. I went way beyond what I thought was capable

00:38:10.860 --> 00:38:13.980
like my first ultra race I did I was uh, I was

00:38:13.980 --> 00:38:16.579
heavier I was in Iraq, you know the Marcus the

00:38:16.579 --> 00:38:19.420
trail lone survivor I was in buds I was in three

00:38:19.420 --> 00:38:21.659
hell weeks as you know as I said many times and

00:38:21.659 --> 00:38:23.739
I knew a lot of guys that died in the operation

00:38:23.739 --> 00:38:25.900
I was at freefall school with Morgan the trail

00:38:25.900 --> 00:38:28.519
who's his twin brother during the operation web

00:38:28.519 --> 00:38:31.539
wings where Marcus chose only survivor I knew

00:38:31.539 --> 00:38:35.179
Marcus trail well And I was about 200 some odd

00:38:35.179 --> 00:38:37.800
pounds and I didn't run hardly at all at this

00:38:37.800 --> 00:38:40.900
time I was a seal but I was like a bodybuilder

00:38:40.900 --> 00:38:43.719
and I did it elliptical trainer 20 minutes on

00:38:43.719 --> 00:38:47.219
Sunday all I did So I did fuck that cardio stuff.

00:38:47.360 --> 00:38:51.860
I was never about it until this happened So that

00:38:51.860 --> 00:38:53.360
happened and I was like man. I gotta find a way

00:38:53.360 --> 00:38:56.219
to raise money for these families. So I googled

00:38:56.219 --> 00:38:59.599
it I found a foundation, Special Operations Warrior

00:38:59.599 --> 00:39:02.420
Foundation, and I googled the 10 hardest races

00:39:02.420 --> 00:39:05.280
in the world. I knew nothing about ultra running.

00:39:05.699 --> 00:39:07.679
The first I'd ever run was 20 miles at one time.

00:39:08.320 --> 00:39:11.860
And so what came up was the Badwater 135, 135

00:39:11.860 --> 00:39:13.699
mile run through Death Valley in the summertime.

00:39:14.800 --> 00:39:16.730
I thought it was a fucking stage race. I know

00:39:16.730 --> 00:39:19.230
people can run 135 miles at one time. I had no

00:39:19.230 --> 00:39:20.289
idea it was even possible. What do you mean a

00:39:20.289 --> 00:39:22.889
stage race? Where you run like 20 miles, camp

00:39:22.889 --> 00:39:26.349
out, and then run 20 more until you get 135 miles.

00:39:26.469 --> 00:39:28.809
Right. So I wanted an ultra runner to know what

00:39:28.809 --> 00:39:30.250
an ultra runner was. I called the race director

00:39:30.250 --> 00:39:33.769
up, Chris Costman of the Badwater, and he said,

00:39:34.190 --> 00:39:36.710
are you an ultra runner? And I was like, I don't

00:39:36.710 --> 00:39:38.630
know what that is. He goes, have you run 100

00:39:38.630 --> 00:39:41.780
miles in 24 hours or less? I was like, no, but

00:39:41.780 --> 00:39:44.219
I said, I'm a Navy SEAL. I was in three hell

00:39:44.219 --> 00:39:45.820
weeks. I was a range. I gave him some resume.

00:39:45.860 --> 00:39:48.300
He didn't give a shit. He said, I don't care.

00:39:48.320 --> 00:39:50.960
You got to qualify for my race. And the deadline

00:39:50.960 --> 00:39:53.000
was up in two months for this bad water race.

00:39:53.719 --> 00:39:56.480
And basically he said, there's two more races

00:39:56.480 --> 00:39:59.039
you can do to qualify. And I might consider you

00:39:59.039 --> 00:40:01.039
my race. We select top 90 athletes in the world

00:40:01.039 --> 00:40:03.619
and you're not even ultra runner, but I like

00:40:03.619 --> 00:40:05.840
your cause, like what you're doing. He said,

00:40:05.840 --> 00:40:08.840
uh, I call him up on a Wednesday and he goes,

00:40:08.900 --> 00:40:11.630
there's a race on Saturday. In San Diego, San

00:40:11.630 --> 00:40:13.889
Diego one day, where you run around a one mile

00:40:13.889 --> 00:40:15.869
track for 24 hours. See how many miles you can

00:40:15.869 --> 00:40:18.750
get. If you get 124 hours, I will consider you

00:40:18.750 --> 00:40:22.550
in my race. I did the math, 14 some minute mile,

00:40:22.650 --> 00:40:26.949
fuck it, I can do that. Dumb shit thinking, I'll

00:40:26.949 --> 00:40:28.969
tell you that right now. It was rough. The worst

00:40:28.969 --> 00:40:30.650
pain I've been in my entire life was this race.

00:40:31.429 --> 00:40:34.429
So I have my wife at the time, she's now my ex

00:40:34.429 --> 00:40:36.690
-wife. We go to Walmart, get a blue lawn chair,

00:40:36.809 --> 00:40:39.260
rich crackers, and mileplex. That's what I'm

00:40:39.260 --> 00:40:42.099
gonna have for a 100 mile run. So, show up at

00:40:42.099 --> 00:40:45.559
the start line of this race. It was the AUA National

00:40:45.559 --> 00:40:48.300
Championships. It's like the best ultra runners

00:40:48.300 --> 00:40:50.780
compete against each other to see how many miles

00:40:50.780 --> 00:40:54.480
you can get in 24 hours. And I'm this big, bodybuilder

00:40:54.480 --> 00:40:55.679
looking guy with his shirt on. How much did you

00:40:55.679 --> 00:40:59.739
weigh back then? I would say I was at least 230.

00:41:00.279 --> 00:41:02.900
At least it may have been more than jacked. Yeah,

00:41:02.900 --> 00:41:04.820
I would yeah, I was ripped the fuck up I was

00:41:04.820 --> 00:41:07.320
big old chest out big. I was I was jacked up.

00:41:07.320 --> 00:41:09.000
There's a picture of me He definitely didn't

00:41:09.000 --> 00:41:10.940
look like someone who could run a harm. No, not

00:41:10.940 --> 00:41:15.159
at all So basically I start running and I get

00:41:15.159 --> 00:41:18.480
to about mile 40 mile 50 and I'm feeling pretty

00:41:18.480 --> 00:41:24.480
good I get to mile 70 and It was the worst pain

00:41:24.480 --> 00:41:27.380
of my life. I sat down this blue lawn chair at

00:41:27.380 --> 00:41:32.059
mile 70 and My the Ritz crackers after mile 20

00:41:32.059 --> 00:41:33.940
became wrist cracker balls. I wouldn't hydrate

00:41:33.940 --> 00:41:36.619
and correctly I know what to do I was drinking

00:41:36.619 --> 00:41:39.039
mileplex for my nutrition because I couldn't

00:41:39.039 --> 00:41:41.579
eat these wrist crackers have very minimal water

00:41:41.579 --> 00:41:44.559
if any at all and I was just dying so I sat down

00:41:44.559 --> 00:41:46.760
this blue lawn chair as I was watching these

00:41:46.760 --> 00:41:49.139
runners go around in this circle I was all dizzy

00:41:49.139 --> 00:41:50.679
and light -headed hadn't gone to the bathroom.

00:41:50.679 --> 00:41:52.539
It's been about 12 hours I went 70 miles about

00:41:52.539 --> 00:41:55.780
12 hours, which is good and I looked at my ex

00:41:55.780 --> 00:41:58.860
-wife now and I was like am fucked I started

00:41:58.860 --> 00:42:02.400
seeing like three of her and once my body stopped

00:42:02.400 --> 00:42:06.199
my mind just went off and I had to go to the

00:42:06.199 --> 00:42:08.460
bathroom and the bathroom was like it's like

00:42:08.460 --> 00:42:11.260
20 feet away from me if that and I couldn't and

00:42:11.260 --> 00:42:13.480
so I sat there and pee blood down my leg and

00:42:13.480 --> 00:42:15.739
started crapping up my back and with 30 miles

00:42:15.739 --> 00:42:19.639
to go I and my feet were broken I was just in

00:42:19.639 --> 00:42:22.880
the worst shape and once you stop running Not

00:42:22.880 --> 00:42:24.739
running like that. I mean, I hadn't run in almost

00:42:24.739 --> 00:42:28.159
a year. I was just doing bodybuilding stuff and

00:42:28.159 --> 00:42:30.719
20 minutes of an elliptical trainer. No running

00:42:30.719 --> 00:42:35.599
at all. I probably ran no shit, no shit, no more

00:42:35.599 --> 00:42:39.320
than 50 miles the whole year. That wasn't my

00:42:39.320 --> 00:42:42.280
thing. I wanted to be like Jack. I didn't want

00:42:42.280 --> 00:42:45.659
to be cardio guy. I wanted to be ripped big Navy

00:42:45.659 --> 00:42:50.539
SEAL guy. And the day before this race, it's

00:42:50.539 --> 00:42:53.219
funny. This guy named Joe Burns, who put me through

00:42:53.219 --> 00:42:55.440
my hell weeks, a seal guy, he's one of the hardest

00:42:55.440 --> 00:42:58.039
guys out there. He was in the gym the Friday

00:42:58.039 --> 00:43:00.360
before I did this race. And he was doing a full

00:43:00.360 --> 00:43:03.239
body squats, deadlifts, power cleans. I said,

00:43:03.380 --> 00:43:05.559
fuck it, man. He's a guy that approved me to

00:43:05.559 --> 00:43:08.699
do this race. He gave me the approval to go do

00:43:08.699 --> 00:43:10.980
this race and signed off on it. So I'm in the

00:43:10.980 --> 00:43:14.039
gym. I went in there and did a full body hardcore

00:43:14.039 --> 00:43:16.539
squats, deadlifts, and everything with this guy.

00:43:16.940 --> 00:43:19.550
Because I knew He was going to come watch me

00:43:19.550 --> 00:43:22.150
in this race. So I've always been about, all

00:43:22.150 --> 00:43:23.369
right, man, you're going to see me come in here

00:43:23.369 --> 00:43:24.849
and jack this weight, and then tomorrow you're

00:43:24.849 --> 00:43:27.510
going to watch me do a 100 -mile run. Where are

00:43:27.510 --> 00:43:30.170
you going to think about that? So basically,

00:43:30.690 --> 00:43:33.989
I paid for it. So he came out there with my favorite

00:43:33.989 --> 00:43:36.349
thing, chocolate mini donuts, because he knew

00:43:36.349 --> 00:43:39.250
my story of my past life, and brought the six

00:43:39.250 --> 00:43:41.110
mini donuts out there. And I had my hat pulled

00:43:41.110 --> 00:43:43.949
down. And at mile 70, man, it was torturous.

00:43:44.889 --> 00:43:47.570
And there was blood down my leg. 30 miles to

00:43:47.570 --> 00:43:52.550
go, I started reaching the cookie jars, man.

00:43:52.650 --> 00:43:55.650
I started pulling off all kind of stuff. I reached

00:43:55.650 --> 00:43:58.329
in my mind and a lot of us when we have bad times

00:43:58.329 --> 00:44:00.429
in life, even the hardest person where we forget

00:44:00.429 --> 00:44:04.349
how badass we are during that hard time. I have

00:44:04.349 --> 00:44:06.309
a thing where I take a couple seconds to reflect

00:44:06.309 --> 00:44:08.809
on, hang on man, you've been through this, you've

00:44:08.809 --> 00:44:10.309
been through that, you overcame this, overcame

00:44:10.309 --> 00:44:13.829
that. I don't ever close my mind to the fact

00:44:13.829 --> 00:44:17.039
that this can't be done. And I knew I had to

00:44:17.039 --> 00:44:18.760
get up, I needed nutrition, I needed hydration,

00:44:18.880 --> 00:44:22.280
I needed to stop being dizzy. So that's the first

00:44:22.280 --> 00:44:24.260
thing I did. I didn't panic on, I had 30 more

00:44:24.260 --> 00:44:27.239
miles to go to get 100. I start about the process.

00:44:28.039 --> 00:44:30.239
Slowly but surely I was able to stand up and

00:44:30.239 --> 00:44:32.980
I was literally hobbling around this track, just

00:44:32.980 --> 00:44:35.480
walking. No running at all, I couldn't run, my

00:44:35.480 --> 00:44:37.380
feet were in the worst pain. This is the worst

00:44:37.380 --> 00:44:39.860
pain I've been in my entire life. Nothing in

00:44:39.860 --> 00:44:42.000
any training is even comparable to this last

00:44:42.000 --> 00:44:46.730
30 miles. And what happened was, my ex -wife

00:44:46.730 --> 00:44:49.489
looked at me and she's like, man, we agreed I'm

00:44:49.489 --> 00:44:51.409
not going to make the time. I was going way too

00:44:51.409 --> 00:44:55.429
slow. And at that time, at Mount 81, something

00:44:55.429 --> 00:44:57.530
clicked that I'll never probably be able to do

00:44:57.530 --> 00:45:00.190
again with my mind, body, spirit, soul, everything

00:45:00.190 --> 00:45:03.070
that's connected. And my mind knew I wasn't fucking

00:45:03.070 --> 00:45:05.809
around anymore. It knew I wasn't going to quit.

00:45:06.150 --> 00:45:08.789
It knew that guy was dead and buried and gone.

00:45:09.389 --> 00:45:11.610
And I was going to die out here on this fucking

00:45:11.610 --> 00:45:14.139
one -mile foot. For whatever reason why, I was

00:45:14.139 --> 00:45:16.039
going to get through this motherfucker. I didn't

00:45:16.039 --> 00:45:18.420
give a damn. There was no fucking crowds. There

00:45:18.420 --> 00:45:21.139
was no trophy at the end. I wasn't even in a

00:45:21.139 --> 00:45:25.079
race in my mind. It was nothing. It wasn't about

00:45:25.079 --> 00:45:26.920
nothing. There was no nothing. It was a bunch

00:45:26.920 --> 00:45:28.739
of people who didn't know who the fuck I was.

00:45:29.179 --> 00:45:32.760
And it was me against me. And I used all these

00:45:32.760 --> 00:45:34.920
different dark places to start bringing out light

00:45:34.920 --> 00:45:37.239
and just fucking going deeper and deeper. Ended

00:45:37.239 --> 00:45:40.059
up running the next 20 miles. I ran 101 miles.

00:45:40.820 --> 00:45:44.090
And I ran the next 20 miles. Ran. at about a

00:45:44.090 --> 00:45:48.489
1030 pace and I did 101 miles in 18 hours and

00:45:48.489 --> 00:45:52.949
56 minutes sat back down that blue porta potty

00:45:52.949 --> 00:45:56.050
now my chair that got from Walmart and that's

00:45:56.050 --> 00:46:00.329
when the body realized I was done and this great

00:46:00.329 --> 00:46:02.630
feeling came over me but also the worst pain

00:46:02.630 --> 00:46:05.489
in my life I that's when I took a humongous shit

00:46:05.489 --> 00:46:09.090
on myself literally like I like a fucking log

00:46:09.090 --> 00:46:11.710
up my fucking back Pissed so much blood down,

00:46:11.829 --> 00:46:15.150
and my wife was, she was a nurse. And she was

00:46:15.150 --> 00:46:17.590
freaked out. I couldn't get up. I couldn't stand

00:46:17.590 --> 00:46:20.889
up. She backed this Camry on the knoll of the

00:46:20.889 --> 00:46:24.170
grassy area I was at. And we were both lifters

00:46:24.170 --> 00:46:25.889
at the time, so she was decently strong. I put

00:46:25.889 --> 00:46:28.389
my arms around her neck. She got me to the back

00:46:28.389 --> 00:46:29.769
seat of the car, let the windows down, kind of

00:46:29.769 --> 00:46:32.989
smelled like horrible shit. And I had this poncho

00:46:32.989 --> 00:46:34.449
on it, because it was November in San Diego,

00:46:34.469 --> 00:46:35.630
so I'm sitting there jacking him in the back

00:46:35.630 --> 00:46:37.829
of his car. And she was terrified. I need to

00:46:37.829 --> 00:46:40.650
get the doctor. I need to get the doctor. So

00:46:40.650 --> 00:46:42.489
I said, just take me home. So we lived in the

00:46:42.489 --> 00:46:45.590
second story or the second deck of this apartment

00:46:45.590 --> 00:46:48.829
complex in San Diego. I got to the first deck,

00:46:49.090 --> 00:46:50.969
so I get out of the car and I could stand up,

00:46:50.969 --> 00:46:53.210
but with my arms around her neck. So I was just

00:46:53.210 --> 00:46:54.869
leaning down because I was going to pass out.

00:46:55.050 --> 00:46:58.789
I got to the first deck, went down. Just couldn't

00:46:58.789 --> 00:47:01.789
stand up anymore. Got her around her neck, worked

00:47:01.789 --> 00:47:05.070
up my way up the railing, got my arms around

00:47:05.070 --> 00:47:07.389
her neck again, walked to the kitchen area, which

00:47:07.389 --> 00:47:09.599
was right in the front door. I was laying on

00:47:09.599 --> 00:47:13.079
the puncture liner, crap was everywhere. I managed,

00:47:13.179 --> 00:47:16.739
she helped me manage to get into the tub and

00:47:16.739 --> 00:47:18.800
it was like dirt was coming out of my penis.

00:47:18.880 --> 00:47:20.920
This looked horrible, just the grossest thing

00:47:20.920 --> 00:47:23.679
in the world. It was the worst pain I could ever,

00:47:23.679 --> 00:47:26.599
ever, ever be in in my life. And the craziest

00:47:26.599 --> 00:47:27.800
thing, I'll tell you a story because it's right

00:47:27.800 --> 00:47:29.860
now, I'm not sadistic, I'm not crazy. People

00:47:29.860 --> 00:47:32.039
may think that, they may want to put a title

00:47:32.039 --> 00:47:33.820
on me after hearing me because it makes them

00:47:33.820 --> 00:47:36.619
feel better. Because they think wow this guy

00:47:36.619 --> 00:47:39.380
must be some special or just fucked up crazy,

00:47:39.380 --> 00:47:43.420
dude No, I'm a guy that came from nothing anybody's

00:47:43.420 --> 00:47:46.920
capable of doing shit like this anybody and I

00:47:46.920 --> 00:47:50.019
sat in that tub She put the water on me She called

00:47:50.019 --> 00:47:52.860
my mom up and my mom was dating a doctor at the

00:47:52.860 --> 00:47:54.940
time the doctor said you need to get him to a

00:47:54.940 --> 00:47:57.780
hospital now She came back in all I want to do

00:47:57.780 --> 00:47:59.619
is call Chris cost on the phone the race director

00:47:59.619 --> 00:48:02.460
of bad waters. I fucking did it So she said I'm

00:48:02.460 --> 00:48:04.420
taking to the doctor. I said no Let me sit here

00:48:04.420 --> 00:48:07.539
and enjoy this pain. She said, what are you talking

00:48:07.539 --> 00:48:10.500
about? I said, you know, I go, I need to go to

00:48:10.500 --> 00:48:13.639
the doctor. I realized that, but I never thought

00:48:13.639 --> 00:48:18.619
it was humanly possible to do what I did. I went

00:48:18.619 --> 00:48:24.980
70 miles at 70 miles. I was dead. I was at a

00:48:24.980 --> 00:48:27.599
hundred percent. What I thought, what I thought

00:48:27.599 --> 00:48:32.429
was a hundred percent. I went 30. 31 more miles

00:48:32.429 --> 00:48:35.489
after being in the worst physical shape I've

00:48:35.489 --> 00:48:39.429
ever been in in my life and all the All that

00:48:39.429 --> 00:48:41.150
pain and suffering and thing was going through

00:48:41.150 --> 00:48:43.789
my fucking body and I sat in that tub and the

00:48:43.789 --> 00:48:47.730
waters hit me and it was the most Amazing feeling

00:48:47.730 --> 00:48:51.190
of accomplishment and I want to be numb. I Don't

00:48:51.190 --> 00:48:53.110
want people to give me drugs in the numbness

00:48:53.110 --> 00:48:56.610
fucking pain. I wanted to I did this Over as

00:48:56.610 --> 00:48:59.369
crazy as it sounds it was the most amazing moment

00:48:59.369 --> 00:49:02.780
of my entire life to overcome such, to come from

00:49:02.780 --> 00:49:06.360
this kid who was mentally torched himself and

00:49:06.360 --> 00:49:09.199
was tortured, it's all to this kid, to this guy

00:49:09.199 --> 00:49:12.820
now, who was able to overcome such amazing odds

00:49:12.820 --> 00:49:15.380
and obstacles. And I called Chris Cosmo, the

00:49:15.380 --> 00:49:18.300
race director of Badwater, and he said, the idea

00:49:18.300 --> 00:49:21.800
of a 24 -hour race is to run 24 hours. You only

00:49:21.800 --> 00:49:25.139
ran 19. And he put doubt in my mind that he would

00:49:25.139 --> 00:49:28.639
let me into Badwater. So a month later or so

00:49:28.639 --> 00:49:29.880
about a month and a half later. I went to this

00:49:29.880 --> 00:49:32.019
race called the hurt 100 It's a hundred mile

00:49:32.019 --> 00:49:35.519
race in Hawaii 26 ,000 feet of car was all he

00:49:35.519 --> 00:49:38.840
said. That's all he said That's so crazy. I mean,

00:49:38.840 --> 00:49:41.159
he's a hardcore dude, but he didn't know how

00:49:41.159 --> 00:49:45.260
fucked up I was right and he said He didn't say

00:49:45.260 --> 00:49:47.619
well, you know, he can say no I'm not gonna let

00:49:47.619 --> 00:49:49.920
you in he put enough doubt in my mind and say

00:49:49.920 --> 00:49:55.159
Matt. I got to do more So I was broken I was

00:49:55.159 --> 00:49:58.469
broken bad Like how long did it take you to recover

00:49:58.469 --> 00:50:00.630
physically the funniest thing about this? I don't

00:50:00.630 --> 00:50:03.289
tell a story very often. I had signed up for

00:50:03.289 --> 00:50:06.550
I'm getting to that answer. It's right now I

00:50:06.550 --> 00:50:08.449
went in deployment and me and my wife my mom

00:50:08.449 --> 00:50:11.190
signed up for the first Las Vegas marathon down

00:50:11.190 --> 00:50:15.429
the strip of Las Vegas and That incident happened.

00:50:16.230 --> 00:50:20.289
So I ran a hundred miles before I ran a marathon

00:50:20.289 --> 00:50:25.119
two weeks later roughly December 5th was this

00:50:25.119 --> 00:50:27.059
marathon that we all signed up for. I couldn't

00:50:27.059 --> 00:50:33.199
walk. I could not walk. I was fucked up. So 10

00:50:33.199 --> 00:50:35.719
days or two weeks after this 100 mile in one

00:50:35.719 --> 00:50:40.280
race I did, this marathon, December 5th in Las

00:50:40.280 --> 00:50:41.900
Vegas, I said, you know what's the first one?

00:50:41.960 --> 00:50:45.300
I can't run. Maybe I can walk with my mom. So

00:50:45.300 --> 00:50:47.559
I tried to go out to this little knoll around

00:50:47.559 --> 00:50:49.760
our grassy area in San Diego. I tried to run,

00:50:50.300 --> 00:50:51.840
legs were broken. I said, fuck, I can't even,

00:50:52.079 --> 00:50:55.900
I'm jacked. Can't do shit. So I said, you know

00:50:55.900 --> 00:50:58.320
what? Maybe I want you guys do the marathon and

00:50:58.320 --> 00:51:00.539
I'll cheer you guys on whatever and I said I'll

00:51:00.539 --> 00:51:03.800
try to rock with my mom December 5th happened

00:51:03.800 --> 00:51:08.960
that gun went off 2005 14 days after I broke

00:51:08.960 --> 00:51:12.420
myself off and I qualified for the Boston Marathon

00:51:12.420 --> 00:51:18.059
around 308 That's crazy and what's funny about

00:51:18.059 --> 00:51:19.699
I know people are here says motherfucker even

00:51:19.699 --> 00:51:23.460
when I tell you the story Dropped I want to drop

00:51:23.460 --> 00:51:25.960
so many names Google it look it up. I don't give

00:51:25.960 --> 00:51:28.760
a fuck like It almost seems like I'm making my

00:51:28.760 --> 00:51:31.880
own story up. It does almost seems like it to

00:51:31.880 --> 00:51:34.059
you It does like when I tell it if I were to

00:51:34.059 --> 00:51:37.630
hear somebody Let's say I listen to Joe Rogan's

00:51:37.630 --> 00:51:40.269
podcast. I heard some black dude from fucking

00:51:40.269 --> 00:51:42.329
Brazil in the end talking about, this happened,

00:51:42.369 --> 00:51:44.210
this happened, three hell weeks, ranger school,

00:51:44.630 --> 00:51:46.309
ran a hundred miles, broke my feet, broke my

00:51:46.309 --> 00:51:49.210
body. I'm like, he's the biggest fucking liar

00:51:49.210 --> 00:51:50.909
on the planet. Ain't nobody doing that shit.

00:51:51.070 --> 00:51:53.550
Even when I tell him my story, it almost sounds

00:51:53.550 --> 00:51:56.710
like some made up shit. It sounds so crazy as

00:51:56.710 --> 00:51:59.090
you ran a hundred miles before you ever ran a

00:51:59.090 --> 00:52:01.570
marathon, then you didn't run again at all and

00:52:01.570 --> 00:52:03.769
you still qualified for the Boston Marathon.

00:52:03.829 --> 00:52:07.909
So you ran a 308 right for the first marathon

00:52:07.909 --> 00:52:10.550
you ever did ever did two weeks after you ran

00:52:10.550 --> 00:52:12.909
a hundred miles right with no training and nothing

00:52:12.909 --> 00:52:15.869
in between but it gets better than that you can

00:52:15.869 --> 00:52:18.789
see my training log that actually posted up so

00:52:18.789 --> 00:52:23.650
that's when i started training for the hurt 100

00:52:23.650 --> 00:52:27.389
so basically what happened was after that i had

00:52:27.389 --> 00:52:29.769
about four weeks what did it feel like to run

00:52:29.769 --> 00:52:33.070
that 308 if you could barely walk when that gun

00:52:33.070 --> 00:52:37.599
went off Something went off in my head and I

00:52:37.599 --> 00:52:40.440
didn't feel that much pain at all Afterwards

00:52:40.440 --> 00:52:43.699
I did But something happened where I was like

00:52:43.699 --> 00:52:47.059
the gun went off and that thing came back like

00:52:47.059 --> 00:52:51.639
all right, man What if? Because I want to qualify

00:52:51.639 --> 00:52:55.059
for Boston. That was my goal But I was I was

00:52:55.059 --> 00:52:58.320
jacked up, you know, and I didn't run as much

00:52:58.320 --> 00:53:01.900
as I should have at all over my Iraq training

00:53:01.900 --> 00:53:05.190
I hit the weights And, but my job, but my goal

00:53:05.190 --> 00:53:08.070
was when I signed up for it a year early, I wanted

00:53:08.070 --> 00:53:09.769
to qualify for Boston, which was a three, 10,

00:53:09.809 --> 00:53:13.670
59. And I was like, what, if you can qualify

00:53:13.670 --> 00:53:15.170
for Boston, man, you should run a hundred. So

00:53:15.170 --> 00:53:18.289
it helped me out. I spent a hundred and one miles.

00:53:19.489 --> 00:53:22.909
What the fuck is 26 miles to me now? So the mindset

00:53:22.909 --> 00:53:26.170
going into it was like, I ran 75 more miles in

00:53:26.170 --> 00:53:30.309
this. So I use it to my advantage. So after that

00:53:30.309 --> 00:53:33.489
happened, I ran my feet pretty much broken. I

00:53:33.489 --> 00:53:35.809
would go to the physical therapist and they had

00:53:35.809 --> 00:53:38.170
this compression tape. Compression tape helped

00:53:38.170 --> 00:53:41.190
because my feet were pretty bad off. And I would

00:53:41.190 --> 00:53:44.929
run 70, 80, 100 mile weeks. And then I went to

00:53:44.929 --> 00:53:48.210
the Hurt 100, racing Hawaii, 26 ,000 feet of

00:53:48.210 --> 00:53:50.769
climbing over 100 miles. Probably one of the

00:53:50.769 --> 00:53:53.030
top five hardest 100 mile races in the world.

00:53:53.929 --> 00:53:57.110
I wasn't even a real runner. I had banked a lot

00:53:57.110 --> 00:53:59.949
of miles by the last, what? Two and a half, about

00:53:59.949 --> 00:54:02.829
two months. But I won a runner. Went out there

00:54:02.829 --> 00:54:05.690
and got through the race. Did in 33 hours, was

00:54:05.690 --> 00:54:08.090
the ninth place finisher. Not many people finished

00:54:08.090 --> 00:54:11.050
that year. And I qualified for bad water and

00:54:11.050 --> 00:54:14.789
got in. And I went on to lose weight and train

00:54:14.789 --> 00:54:16.489
hard. And I got fifth my first year and went

00:54:16.489 --> 00:54:18.969
back my second year and got third. When you say

00:54:18.969 --> 00:54:21.630
you lost weight, what were you eventually weighing?

00:54:22.509 --> 00:54:25.429
So I went to the race about 190, 195. So you

00:54:25.429 --> 00:54:27.369
lost quite a bit from your bodybuilding time.

00:54:27.389 --> 00:54:29.469
Right. That's over a short period of time. Right.

00:54:29.550 --> 00:54:31.329
How did you lose all that weight? Once again,

00:54:31.469 --> 00:54:34.869
I just worked out hard. I stopped taking my protein

00:54:34.869 --> 00:54:37.809
so much. I got off, I was on this stuff called

00:54:37.809 --> 00:54:41.570
Nitro Tech. And I got off all the protein stuff.

00:54:41.730 --> 00:54:43.090
I just started, I stopped hitting the weights

00:54:43.090 --> 00:54:48.389
so hard. And I just became a running fool. Became

00:54:48.389 --> 00:54:50.920
the black forest gut man, pretty much. Pretty

00:54:50.920 --> 00:54:52.820
simple, man. That's what happened. Now when you

00:54:52.820 --> 00:54:55.039
say you were using compression tape on your feet

00:54:55.039 --> 00:54:56.920
and that your feet were jacked up, what was the

00:54:56.920 --> 00:54:59.820
extent of the injuries? So basically, because

00:54:59.820 --> 00:55:01.739
of my pronation that I never figured out because

00:55:01.739 --> 00:55:06.139
of my psoas muscles, I always had issues with

00:55:06.139 --> 00:55:08.460
stretch, fracture, shin splints. So I put a lot

00:55:08.460 --> 00:55:11.460
of pressure on the inside of my ankles. And so

00:55:11.460 --> 00:55:14.760
there's this tendon that goes up the back side

00:55:14.760 --> 00:55:18.969
of your, I don't know if it's your fibula. on

00:55:18.969 --> 00:55:20.789
the backside of that little bone, on the backside

00:55:20.789 --> 00:55:23.989
of your foot, it goes right alongside that bone.

00:55:24.789 --> 00:55:27.789
And that thing was just so flared up on both

00:55:27.789 --> 00:55:30.829
sides that even this flexing of my foot was just

00:55:30.829 --> 00:55:35.010
killing me. So I realized when you cast that

00:55:35.010 --> 00:55:37.489
thing up, casting my feet always helped me out.

00:55:37.909 --> 00:55:40.469
Because it locked my foot into a position that

00:55:40.469 --> 00:55:42.969
wouldn't make me pronate as much. So between

00:55:42.969 --> 00:55:45.630
the casting of that, and if you watched the Badwater

00:55:45.630 --> 00:55:49.050
video of 2006, you see me crossing the finish

00:55:49.050 --> 00:55:52.289
line with this compression tape literally like

00:55:52.289 --> 00:55:55.030
flying on my ankles because I went to the race

00:55:55.030 --> 00:55:58.170
with compression tape on my ankles and so basically

00:55:58.170 --> 00:56:02.190
I'd have that on my you know on my ankles I had

00:56:02.190 --> 00:56:05.230
inserts in my you know in my shoes and also this

00:56:05.230 --> 00:56:09.090
wedge on the back heel of my left foot so then

00:56:09.090 --> 00:56:10.909
it would keep me from pronating that heel so

00:56:10.909 --> 00:56:14.150
much so I had all that on just to go around and

00:56:14.150 --> 00:56:18.469
I Ran my ass off and went to Badwater 2006 and

00:56:18.469 --> 00:56:23.010
with compression tape on my feet and walked a

00:56:23.010 --> 00:56:25.610
lot, but I got third place. Do you always run

00:56:25.610 --> 00:56:28.050
with regular running shoes? I do, yeah. So now

00:56:28.050 --> 00:56:30.469
I don't have those issues anymore. All the stretching

00:56:30.469 --> 00:56:32.909
has opened my body up to where, how it should

00:56:32.909 --> 00:56:35.469
have been. So my alignment is pretty good. It's

00:56:35.469 --> 00:56:37.949
not perfect. So now I just run in regular running

00:56:37.949 --> 00:56:40.190
shoes now. No more compression tape, no more

00:56:40.190 --> 00:56:41.750
none of that stuff. So if you see now, if you

00:56:41.750 --> 00:56:44.070
look down there, you'll see The compression tape,

00:56:44.070 --> 00:56:47.030
and you'll see my ex -wife here in a second taking

00:56:47.030 --> 00:56:49.389
the compression tape off of me. She's doing it

00:56:49.389 --> 00:56:52.010
right now. You see her right now? You see the

00:56:52.010 --> 00:56:54.210
tape? Yeah. So that's the tape right there that

00:56:54.210 --> 00:56:56.510
I had to wear every day of my life to run. Wow.

00:56:56.809 --> 00:57:00.010
So as you see, the story may be kind of unbelievable,

00:57:00.250 --> 00:57:03.110
but there's some proof right there. Fuck, man.

00:57:03.650 --> 00:57:06.090
That looks so painful. Yeah, I was pretty fucked

00:57:06.090 --> 00:57:08.190
up. As you see right now, me trying to get up.

00:57:08.309 --> 00:57:10.889
Oh, man. Yeah, I'm pretty destroyed right there.

00:57:11.579 --> 00:57:13.500
What is the most amount of miles you've ever

00:57:13.500 --> 00:57:19.059
run at one time? Yeah, 205 in 39 hours Wow non

00:57:19.059 --> 00:57:23.460
-stop Whoo Yeah, I've had quite a few people

00:57:23.460 --> 00:57:26.239
on I've met quite a few people now over the last

00:57:26.239 --> 00:57:29.159
year or so that have run ultras Courtney Doe

00:57:29.159 --> 00:57:32.440
Walter, you know, she is She won the Moab. Okay.

00:57:32.440 --> 00:57:34.559
Yeah, I heard about 40 rather heard about her.

00:57:34.579 --> 00:57:38.610
Yeah. She she beat all the men by 22 miles something

00:57:38.610 --> 00:57:41.030
like that some crazy thing. She was first place

00:57:41.030 --> 00:57:43.050
winner. She beat everybody else second place

00:57:43.050 --> 00:57:46.909
winner, but and With her I mean you would never

00:57:46.909 --> 00:57:49.530
believe it when you talk to her. She seems so

00:57:49.530 --> 00:57:52.389
normal, right? She drinks beer and eats nachos

00:57:52.389 --> 00:57:54.989
and eats candy ultra winner, man She's just silly

00:57:54.989 --> 00:57:58.329
and she's fun. Yep, and there's no demon there

00:57:58.400 --> 00:58:00.800
Not waiting to meet a demon right, you know,

00:58:00.800 --> 00:58:02.699
I'm like, where's your demon? Right. How you

00:58:02.699 --> 00:58:05.699
getting through that? Her demons a quiet demon,

00:58:05.920 --> 00:58:08.579
right? It's it's there it has to be there's something

00:58:08.579 --> 00:58:11.079
there has to be there's no other people that

00:58:11.079 --> 00:58:13.460
Everybody I know that that can do that as a demon

00:58:13.460 --> 00:58:15.519
a lot of us don't want to admit the shit Yeah,

00:58:15.699 --> 00:58:18.500
we got him a hundred percent. It has to be yeah

00:58:18.500 --> 00:58:24.519
so when you do this and You you qualify and you

00:58:24.519 --> 00:58:27.019
you do that race in Hawaii, right? They just

00:58:27.019 --> 00:58:29.840
let you in after that? No, so the race in Hawaii,

00:58:30.440 --> 00:58:31.739
um, yeah, I actually called the race director

00:58:31.739 --> 00:58:34.579
up and there wasn't like a big time, like I didn't

00:58:34.579 --> 00:58:37.659
have 100 mile race. I believe this I had and

00:58:37.659 --> 00:58:40.559
so, you know, 100 mile, you did the Boston or

00:58:40.559 --> 00:58:43.099
you did the Vegas marathon. Yeah. So I did a

00:58:43.099 --> 00:58:45.880
hundred mile, a hundred mile, the Vegas marathon

00:58:45.880 --> 00:58:48.900
went to hurt 100. Did that hundred -miler. And

00:58:48.900 --> 00:58:50.900
all this is in a very short amount of time. Yeah,

00:58:51.000 --> 00:58:53.659
so November was the first hundred -miler. December

00:58:53.659 --> 00:58:59.280
was the 26 -miler in Las Vegas. January was the

00:58:59.280 --> 00:59:00.880
next hundred -miler in Hawaii. Do you know how

00:59:00.880 --> 00:59:02.860
fucking crazy that is? Like, say if I was your

00:59:02.860 --> 00:59:04.960
friend and I called you up on October 20th, I'd

00:59:04.960 --> 00:59:06.539
go, hey man, how many times you run? You're like,

00:59:06.579 --> 00:59:08.070
ah. I run every now and then. You wanna see something

00:59:08.070 --> 00:59:09.269
crazy? I don't know if you can pull it up or

00:59:09.269 --> 00:59:10.610
not, but if you can pull up my race schedule

00:59:10.610 --> 00:59:13.710
for 2007, just pull up David Goggins race results.

00:59:13.909 --> 00:59:15.369
You're gonna see something real crazy in a second.

00:59:16.409 --> 00:59:20.110
And I gotta show you proof, because why? I know

00:59:20.110 --> 00:59:22.469
my story doesn't make any sense, but just look

00:59:22.469 --> 00:59:25.090
at the dates of these races, and we're gonna

00:59:25.090 --> 00:59:28.670
show it to you in a second. Just look at the

00:59:28.670 --> 00:59:31.130
hundred miles and 50 miles back -to -back weekends.

00:59:31.170 --> 00:59:34.030
How many weekends there were between races? So

00:59:34.030 --> 00:59:35.469
if you look right here, you can't really see

00:59:35.469 --> 00:59:38.230
it. So if you look at 2007, you gotta go all

00:59:38.230 --> 00:59:41.889
the way down Keep on going to those races there.

00:59:41.929 --> 00:59:44.550
Mm -hmm to that. Okay gets right there. So 100

00:59:44.550 --> 00:59:48.369
mile or Hawaii Oh, Jesus Christ two weeks later

00:59:48.369 --> 00:59:50.250
three weeks later. Another one. That's 50 mile

00:59:50.250 --> 00:59:54.469
or a 50 mile or a month later, they're looking

00:59:54.469 --> 00:59:59.789
at what 14 days later, another 50k, 50 mile a

00:59:59.789 --> 01:00:02.369
month later, then you look at less than a month,

01:00:02.610 --> 01:00:07.090
another 50 mile, 53 mile in June, July was another

01:00:07.090 --> 01:00:10.809
100 mile, Badwater was literally, Badwater was

01:00:10.809 --> 01:00:13.610
a month after I did that 100 mile, 135 mile,

01:00:13.769 --> 01:00:17.250
Leadville was less than a month after Badwater.

01:00:17.750 --> 01:00:20.909
The Plane 100 was three weeks after Leadville.

01:00:21.880 --> 01:00:25.679
Angel's crest was to attend a week after that

01:00:25.679 --> 01:00:29.780
hundred mile Earth the bear 100 was What 13 days

01:00:29.780 --> 01:00:32.239
after that hundred mile Earth? She's and then

01:00:32.239 --> 01:00:35.780
I ran the 200 and it said 203 .5 But I didn't

01:00:35.780 --> 01:00:38.920
ran tour is 205 miles around there But what's

01:00:38.920 --> 01:00:42.219
not in there was that McNaughton race I did in

01:00:42.219 --> 01:00:46.019
2000 so that 150 mile race I also did in 2007

01:00:46.019 --> 01:00:49.739
that wasn't listed. So that was just my 2007

01:00:49.739 --> 01:00:52.760
year That's insane. Yeah, so do you think that

01:00:52.760 --> 01:00:55.599
is what fucked your body up? No, no, no, cuz

01:00:55.599 --> 01:00:58.900
I I still run the same mileage now Well, fuck

01:00:58.900 --> 01:01:02.019
my body up was hell week Really? Oh, yeah, you

01:01:02.019 --> 01:01:03.500
don't go through three hell weeks in one year

01:01:03.500 --> 01:01:06.000
So I so what happened was when I realized that

01:01:06.000 --> 01:01:08.719
my body was really jacked up was I went I was

01:01:08.719 --> 01:01:12.500
a big -time squatter love squatting and I went

01:01:12.500 --> 01:01:14.900
through the first hell week got messed up. Second

01:01:14.900 --> 01:01:16.519
Hell Week, I got all the way through. Then third

01:01:16.519 --> 01:01:17.559
Hell Week, I got all the way through. And my

01:01:17.559 --> 01:01:19.760
third Hell Week, we had a guy die on Thursday.

01:01:20.420 --> 01:01:22.599
And then that Hell Week, and I graduated. How

01:01:22.599 --> 01:01:25.960
did he die? Pulmonary edema. It was a cold, his

01:01:25.960 --> 01:01:30.579
name was John Scop. Cold as fuck Hell Week. The

01:01:30.579 --> 01:01:33.219
Pacific Ocean's never warm. And it rained the

01:01:33.219 --> 01:01:35.280
whole time. The whole time it just rained. And

01:01:35.280 --> 01:01:37.880
he pretty much just... Drowning his own fluid

01:01:37.880 --> 01:01:40.480
pretty much we were in the pool doing some evolution.

01:01:40.480 --> 01:01:43.500
He sunk to the bottom His temperature was hot.

01:01:43.599 --> 01:01:45.980
He missed a lot of hell week for getting pulled

01:01:45.980 --> 01:01:48.579
out for different stuff He wouldn't go quit and

01:01:48.579 --> 01:01:51.539
he ended up dying hell week. But um, yeah, so

01:01:51.539 --> 01:01:55.320
anyway after hell week ended I want to go back

01:01:55.320 --> 01:01:57.639
to the gym, you know So second phase happened

01:01:57.639 --> 01:01:59.360
dive phase like I could get back in the gym start

01:01:59.360 --> 01:02:02.360
jacking my weight I love jacking weight and I

01:02:02.360 --> 01:02:05.500
realized I couldn't squat So I went from squatting

01:02:05.500 --> 01:02:07.239
a lot to I couldn't even squat the bar because

01:02:07.239 --> 01:02:09.079
my lower back was all fucked up I was like, I

01:02:09.079 --> 01:02:11.679
don't know what's going on It was because this

01:02:11.679 --> 01:02:15.320
this muscle so in Hell Week Your hip flexors

01:02:15.320 --> 01:02:17.659
are so and I went through so many of them so

01:02:17.659 --> 01:02:21.099
fast and so the hardest part of buds I went through

01:02:21.099 --> 01:02:24.079
three times not not the Hell Week part. Yes one

01:02:24.079 --> 01:02:25.800
of the hardest parts, but it was the initial

01:02:25.800 --> 01:02:29.039
part of the What everybody sees on TV, the log

01:02:29.039 --> 01:02:32.599
PT, the surf torture, the dad gone boats over

01:02:32.599 --> 01:02:34.500
your head, all that shit. I went through that

01:02:34.500 --> 01:02:38.880
person three times in one year. And over a period

01:02:38.880 --> 01:02:43.079
of time, my hip flexors got so tight that it

01:02:43.079 --> 01:02:45.260
has jacked me up. It jacked me up from my hip

01:02:45.260 --> 01:02:48.239
flexor, always being so cold and so stressed

01:02:48.239 --> 01:02:51.880
out. And everything lit up to it. But this really

01:02:51.880 --> 01:02:54.639
was the part that I noticed I could squat before

01:02:54.639 --> 01:02:57.460
Hell Week. or before my first time going to Bud's.

01:02:57.960 --> 01:03:02.940
After Bud's, I couldn't squat anymore. Do you

01:03:02.940 --> 01:03:04.960
just think it might just be because your body

01:03:04.960 --> 01:03:09.340
was exhausted? No. For 12 years, I would go back

01:03:09.340 --> 01:03:11.780
and tough it out, like with Joe Burns. He was

01:03:11.780 --> 01:03:13.079
squatting, so I said, fuck, I'm going to squat

01:03:13.079 --> 01:03:16.139
with Joe Burns. But I just couldn't squat because

01:03:16.139 --> 01:03:18.880
that muscle was attached to your T12. So what

01:03:18.880 --> 01:03:21.019
was it doing to? Is it locking up? It was just

01:03:21.019 --> 01:03:24.570
pulling. So it made my hips feel like I couldn't

01:03:24.570 --> 01:03:27.429
sink my ass. I couldn't think so. It's incredible

01:03:27.429 --> 01:03:31.070
pain and then with the weight Pushing me down

01:03:31.070 --> 01:03:33.869
and then trying to push up the pain was just

01:03:33.869 --> 01:03:35.710
is just too much So it's all this is all range

01:03:35.710 --> 01:03:37.650
of motion it already is emotion issues. Yeah

01:03:37.650 --> 01:03:39.829
Wow, that that's an important thing for my friend

01:03:39.829 --> 01:03:42.710
cam Haynes who doesn't stretch He's another friend

01:03:42.710 --> 01:03:45.849
of mine who runs ultra races. He ran that Moab

01:03:45.849 --> 01:03:49.869
240 He's run the Bigfoot 205. He's run a few

01:03:49.869 --> 01:03:53.130
of those right um. I know he's listening go stretch,

01:03:53.130 --> 01:03:55.489
dude Yeah, support man. It was especially if

01:03:55.489 --> 01:03:57.389
you're working that hard right if you're doing

01:03:57.389 --> 01:03:59.409
that much Yeah, you're you're definitely locking

01:03:59.409 --> 01:04:01.670
up. He could barely touch his toes. Yeah, that's

01:04:01.670 --> 01:04:04.130
not a good thing. That's not good No, no it comes

01:04:04.130 --> 01:04:06.090
back to hurt you inside pretty soon now How flexible

01:04:06.090 --> 01:04:07.570
are you now because I would imagine you probably

01:04:07.570 --> 01:04:09.670
a fucking ballerina at this point because sad

01:04:09.670 --> 01:04:13.039
knowing your brain I'm trying to get there. I'm

01:04:13.039 --> 01:04:14.539
trying to get there, so I stretch every night

01:04:14.539 --> 01:04:16.039
for at least two hours. There's a thing that

01:04:16.039 --> 01:04:18.699
people say that always pisses me off, because

01:04:18.699 --> 01:04:20.980
I'm pretty flexible. They say, oh, you're naturally

01:04:20.980 --> 01:04:22.739
flexible. People have a natural threshold. They're

01:04:22.739 --> 01:04:25.480
like, no, they don't. A doctor told me that.

01:04:25.579 --> 01:04:26.719
I go, you don't know what you're talking about.

01:04:26.980 --> 01:04:28.039
I'm like, you don't know what you're talking

01:04:28.039 --> 01:04:29.460
about, because most people don't push themselves

01:04:29.460 --> 01:04:32.280
past that pain, that stretch pain. Right. People

01:04:32.280 --> 01:04:33.800
want to put a title on you, man. It's easier

01:04:33.800 --> 01:04:35.760
for them. You're just fucking natural. Exactly.

01:04:35.760 --> 01:04:38.000
You're natural. Exactly. No, you don't work hard

01:04:38.000 --> 01:04:40.400
enough, motherfucker. Yeah, people don't like

01:04:40.400 --> 01:04:42.500
champs aren't usually flexible right you have

01:04:42.500 --> 01:04:44.480
to you have to force yourself to do that's right

01:04:44.480 --> 01:04:47.059
And I know it because I had a friend my friend

01:04:47.059 --> 01:04:49.719
Tom or dogna He was a football player Jack big

01:04:49.719 --> 01:04:52.420
thick dude Terrible flexibility was taking taekwondo

01:04:52.420 --> 01:04:54.519
with me right and over the course of a couple

01:04:54.519 --> 01:04:56.860
years I saw that dude eventually develop a full

01:04:56.860 --> 01:04:58.500
split there you go, and he just did it through

01:04:58.500 --> 01:05:00.840
his mind Yes was everybody else was done training

01:05:00.840 --> 01:05:03.500
that guy would be on the mat Constantly stretching

01:05:03.500 --> 01:05:06.139
always working out because he had built his body

01:05:06.139 --> 01:05:09.050
up so strong right all those years Squatting

01:05:09.050 --> 01:05:11.630
and lifting that he just you know, he was all

01:05:11.630 --> 01:05:14.030
tense. Everything was just like this super powerful,

01:05:14.349 --> 01:05:16.349
right? But all like very tense. That's why I

01:05:16.349 --> 01:05:18.369
stopped That's why I never stretched because

01:05:18.369 --> 01:05:20.610
I wanted that strength. Yeah, you want that tight

01:05:20.610 --> 01:05:23.090
muscle, but no, I don't think it's stupid Yeah,

01:05:23.090 --> 01:05:25.230
I think you're not supposed to stretch before

01:05:25.230 --> 01:05:28.010
you do big physical activities because I think

01:05:28.010 --> 01:05:30.329
it does like weaken you somewhat But I don't

01:05:30.329 --> 01:05:32.590
think being flexible overall makes you weaker

01:05:32.590 --> 01:05:35.809
not at all What certainly doesn't for martial

01:05:35.809 --> 01:05:38.460
arts because you need that flexing? To have leg

01:05:38.460 --> 01:05:40.800
dexterity to be able to kick right it's got to

01:05:40.800 --> 01:05:43.760
be fluid where it's not Tightened up by a restriction

01:05:43.760 --> 01:05:46.079
of the motion of your body. I get it. It's truth

01:05:46.079 --> 01:05:48.960
I just think people are for whatever reason and

01:05:48.960 --> 01:05:52.360
I'm a I'm one of those I Drone on too much about

01:05:52.360 --> 01:05:54.320
yoga. I'm like one of those vegans. It's like

01:05:54.320 --> 01:05:57.460
you got to do it man, right? I get annoying like

01:05:57.460 --> 01:05:59.239
a born -again Christian or something. It's like

01:05:59.239 --> 01:06:01.539
I'm getting that way now, man I'm getting that

01:06:01.539 --> 01:06:04.119
way now for anybody who does anything hard like

01:06:04.119 --> 01:06:07.780
you know if you do anything like with weightlifting

01:06:07.780 --> 01:06:10.539
type shit or martial arts type shit where it's

01:06:10.539 --> 01:06:13.619
just everything's explosion, it's lifting, it's

01:06:13.619 --> 01:06:17.139
heavy, it's push, push, push. Yoga just will

01:06:17.139 --> 01:06:20.360
bounce your shit out. It really will, man. And

01:06:20.360 --> 01:06:22.340
it's all these people that resist it. Like there

01:06:22.340 --> 01:06:24.380
was some article recently that was something

01:06:24.380 --> 01:06:27.599
along the lines of hot yoga is just trendy nonsense.

01:06:28.159 --> 01:06:30.780
I read that and then even in the article it talked

01:06:30.780 --> 01:06:33.059
about that there might be some benefits in terms

01:06:33.059 --> 01:06:35.780
of like the strengthening your arteries and they

01:06:35.780 --> 01:06:38.219
didn't even mention heat shock proteins. There's

01:06:38.219 --> 01:06:40.179
a study going on right now. I believe it's at

01:06:40.179 --> 01:06:42.639
Harvard. One of my friends was telling me about

01:06:42.639 --> 01:06:45.380
it where they're trying to find the benefits

01:06:45.380 --> 01:06:48.139
of 90 -minute hot yoga classes because they think

01:06:48.139 --> 01:06:51.179
it might mirror the observed benefits of sauna

01:06:51.179 --> 01:06:55.199
which they already know for a fact. Has big benefits

01:06:55.199 --> 01:06:57.739
because of your body producing heat shock proteins

01:06:57.739 --> 01:06:59.199
to deal with the heat, right? That's why I put

01:06:59.199 --> 01:07:01.239
that song in here man. I go in that fucker all

01:07:01.239 --> 01:07:03.139
the time Well, no one can tell me doesn't work.

01:07:03.219 --> 01:07:05.699
It's big. It's proof positive It changed my life

01:07:05.699 --> 01:07:08.059
that it wasn't a medication or this or a dread.

01:07:08.139 --> 01:07:10.500
It was stretching Yeah, it was yoga stretching

01:07:10.500 --> 01:07:12.579
all that stuff combined changed it Well, I just

01:07:12.579 --> 01:07:15.480
think it balances out your body in those static

01:07:15.480 --> 01:07:18.099
poses where you're just holding the holes and

01:07:18.349 --> 01:07:21.750
It just, it works you out in a weird way. A hundred

01:07:21.750 --> 01:07:24.269
percent. You just don't get lifting weights or

01:07:24.269 --> 01:07:25.710
hitting the bag or anything else. You're just

01:07:25.710 --> 01:07:27.670
not going to get that kind of working out. I

01:07:27.670 --> 01:07:29.489
can't agree with you more. And it's so difficult.

01:07:29.769 --> 01:07:31.269
That's what's crazy. You'll slit your ass off.

01:07:31.309 --> 01:07:33.170
You're in there with a bunch of housewives and

01:07:33.170 --> 01:07:34.989
shit and you're like, this is like the silent

01:07:34.989 --> 01:07:37.489
struggle. It's humbling. Nobody knows. No, it's

01:07:37.489 --> 01:07:39.909
humbling. If you see like two doorways, right,

01:07:40.130 --> 01:07:42.909
and one of them is like fucking C .T., Ollie,

01:07:43.210 --> 01:07:47.329
Fletcher's. Fucking super pump iron addicts gym,

01:07:47.670 --> 01:07:50.889
which is hard work right next to it is the yoga

01:07:50.889 --> 01:07:53.130
studio You're like, well once you get done with

01:07:53.130 --> 01:07:56.010
all that hard work, you'll go over to that yoga

01:07:56.010 --> 01:07:57.969
studio No, there's two different kinds of hard

01:07:57.969 --> 01:08:00.170
work going on. It's no joke two different kinds

01:08:00.170 --> 01:08:03.530
of hard work. Yes, sir So what do you do now

01:08:03.530 --> 01:08:06.940
in terms of like you got over this? Five years

01:08:06.940 --> 01:08:09.340
ago. You're in this bad situation when your body's

01:08:09.340 --> 01:08:11.059
not working right now. Everything's working great

01:08:11.059 --> 01:08:14.539
again Well, I had two heart surgeries also. Whoa

01:08:14.539 --> 01:08:18.680
So, you know your heart so I had a hole in it

01:08:18.680 --> 01:08:21.079
So, you know, you're not supposed to have a hole

01:08:21.079 --> 01:08:23.840
in your heart and be a seal and it was born with

01:08:23.840 --> 01:08:27.079
it I was born with it. It went undetected and

01:08:27.079 --> 01:08:30.859
Me pushing so hard. So in 2009 I was training

01:08:30.859 --> 01:08:34.369
for this race across America and I just couldn't

01:08:34.369 --> 01:08:36.770
go anymore. Another pitfall in my life was the

01:08:36.770 --> 01:08:39.770
hole, and I was pretty much off active duty seal

01:08:39.770 --> 01:08:42.050
for three years. You know, I had two heartstrings,

01:08:42.210 --> 01:08:44.149
them trying to fix it, so the hole was significantly

01:08:44.149 --> 01:08:47.529
large. Like how big? They say it was as big as

01:08:47.529 --> 01:08:49.550
a quarter. I'm like, how the hell is it as big

01:08:49.550 --> 01:08:51.130
as a quarter? Yeah, that's a pretty big hole

01:08:51.130 --> 01:08:53.289
in your heart, because they had two helix patches.

01:08:53.390 --> 01:08:56.090
I'm like, that's impossible. The helix patches,

01:08:56.229 --> 01:08:57.689
they're in my heart, so the two stents. What

01:08:57.689 --> 01:09:01.890
is a helix patch? It is like a little mesh, very...

01:09:01.869 --> 01:09:03.869
Like what they do for hernias? Like something

01:09:03.869 --> 01:09:05.770
like that? Maybe something like that. So they

01:09:05.770 --> 01:09:07.970
went through my femoral artery, and they placed

01:09:07.970 --> 01:09:10.029
this patch. To go through your artery? Yeah,

01:09:10.029 --> 01:09:11.909
they went through my femoral artery. Like with

01:09:11.909 --> 01:09:15.069
a camera? Yeah. So the camera was down through

01:09:15.069 --> 01:09:18.430
my throat. And they put this catheter through

01:09:18.430 --> 01:09:22.130
my femoral artery that went to my heart. They

01:09:22.130 --> 01:09:25.789
went and they took this Helix patch, they placed

01:09:25.789 --> 01:09:27.829
it in there, and then they found out six months

01:09:27.829 --> 01:09:29.989
later that the hole wasn't covered up enough

01:09:29.989 --> 01:09:32.390
yet. Because the whole was just I mean in the

01:09:32.390 --> 01:09:35.449
healers patch was very damn big so they put and

01:09:35.449 --> 01:09:38.430
they go back in there in 2010 How does the patch

01:09:38.430 --> 01:09:40.989
adhere to your heart? I guess your heart heals

01:09:40.989 --> 01:09:43.210
around the patch. So but how do they stick it

01:09:43.210 --> 01:09:46.090
in place? I I guess they put it where the holes

01:09:46.090 --> 01:09:49.109
at uh -huh, and then it kind of like inflates

01:09:49.109 --> 01:09:52.409
The hole is that and then that thing goes in

01:09:52.409 --> 01:09:54.670
there and then it kind of covers the hole and

01:09:54.670 --> 01:09:57.390
then the heart So there's two things in my heart

01:09:57.390 --> 01:09:59.390
right now that the heart is kind of covered up.

01:09:59.670 --> 01:10:02.609
Whoa Okay, so here's it. So there you go. Jamie's

01:10:02.609 --> 01:10:07.229
got a an image of it for us. Whoa So so it's

01:10:07.229 --> 01:10:10.430
attached to this little probe right and then

01:10:10.430 --> 01:10:13.609
they put it over the area where the injury is

01:10:13.609 --> 01:10:16.989
Wow, that's insane. Yeah atrial septum defective

01:10:16.989 --> 01:10:20.420
I had atrial septal defect So basically everything

01:10:20.420 --> 01:10:23.180
I've done, I don't got from medicine. Oh shit.

01:10:23.699 --> 01:10:26.979
I'd be done. That's so crazy. They could do that.

01:10:26.979 --> 01:10:29.220
Yeah. So I was out for, um, I was off active

01:10:29.220 --> 01:10:32.319
duty for three years. So I stuck, I was in a

01:10:32.319 --> 01:10:34.340
recruiting area for three years, trying to get

01:10:34.340 --> 01:10:37.500
back on active duty. And that's, that was my

01:10:37.500 --> 01:10:40.079
life for three years. So they put that patch

01:10:40.079 --> 01:10:42.880
in and now your heart's a hundred percent. It's

01:10:42.880 --> 01:10:45.260
a hundred percent. It's a hundred percent. Wow.

01:10:45.420 --> 01:10:47.760
Yeah. That's incredible. Yeah. I was a losing.

01:10:48.230 --> 01:10:51.229
You know blood and I was this I was a bad off

01:10:51.229 --> 01:10:53.149
Which is amazing that you were able to do all

01:10:53.149 --> 01:10:54.869
that with a hole in your heart That's what the

01:10:54.869 --> 01:10:56.350
doctors were saying, you know, because they know

01:10:56.350 --> 01:10:58.970
I was a seal so when I went in and the doctor

01:10:58.970 --> 01:11:01.649
that found the hole Are you like so they gave

01:11:01.649 --> 01:11:04.470
me EKG's all this stuff once again, man? You

01:11:04.470 --> 01:11:07.970
it's after I ran like 205 miles, you know, right

01:11:07.970 --> 01:11:09.789
that made you're in great shape. I'm like man

01:11:09.789 --> 01:11:12.970
I just don't feel good like walking up the stairs

01:11:12.970 --> 01:11:16.760
is making me jacked up. So The doctor, Doc Shrek,

01:11:17.079 --> 01:11:19.260
he's like, you know, gave me EKG. Go to the doctor,

01:11:19.359 --> 01:11:22.319
get an echocardiogram. So I'm in there, getting

01:11:22.319 --> 01:11:24.020
an echocardiogram, just chilling out in there.

01:11:24.460 --> 01:11:26.180
And the guy's talking to me, has his little wand

01:11:26.180 --> 01:11:28.619
in my heart. We're bullshitting about stuff.

01:11:28.779 --> 01:11:32.279
And he, when people get quiet, that's fucking

01:11:32.279 --> 01:11:34.699
not good, man. So he's in there, just has his

01:11:34.699 --> 01:11:37.100
wand in my heart, chilling out. Yeah, man, what

01:11:37.100 --> 01:11:38.479
are you doing? Yeah, you know, what's going on?

01:11:40.779 --> 01:11:44.020
And he says, I'll be right back. He goes and

01:11:44.020 --> 01:11:46.840
gets a doctor. Doctor comes in puts thing on

01:11:46.840 --> 01:11:51.899
my heart The doctor gets another doctor Now I'm

01:11:51.899 --> 01:11:54.000
just freaking the fuck out. I'm like, okay cuz

01:11:54.000 --> 01:11:55.340
when it comes to your heart, you know, it's a

01:11:55.340 --> 01:11:58.119
big deal So they come back in they say hey, we

01:11:58.119 --> 01:12:00.739
can stop the echocardiogram when they talk to

01:12:00.739 --> 01:12:03.420
you in the hallway you have a hole in your heart

01:12:03.420 --> 01:12:07.000
and The guy didn't know that I was he knew I

01:12:07.000 --> 01:12:08.720
was a Navy guy I don't think he was a seal cuz

01:12:08.720 --> 01:12:11.739
not many black guys are seals and he had a conversation

01:12:11.739 --> 01:12:14.539
about you know We gotta fix this real quick.

01:12:14.739 --> 01:12:16.340
I said yeah, I mean then I came up that I was

01:12:16.340 --> 01:12:19.460
the seal He said man, you could have died jumping.

01:12:19.560 --> 01:12:22.180
You can die diving You could have died and all

01:12:22.180 --> 01:12:24.119
this stuff because basically the hole in your

01:12:24.119 --> 01:12:26.779
heart if it gets plugged with something Like

01:12:26.779 --> 01:12:28.180
anything like, you know, let's say you get a

01:12:28.180 --> 01:12:30.859
bubble from diving or something like that. You're

01:12:30.859 --> 01:12:35.680
gonna die, right? So I I I call it luck. I call

01:12:35.680 --> 01:12:39.170
it luck Wow So I I got through two surgeries

01:12:39.170 --> 01:12:41.250
they put me back on I lost they give you the

01:12:41.250 --> 01:12:43.050
first one And then how much when do they realize

01:12:43.050 --> 01:12:45.010
that it's not not good enough So they take you

01:12:45.010 --> 01:12:47.609
back in you get a bubble study a bubble test

01:12:47.609 --> 01:12:50.569
So it's so they like literally send bubbles that

01:12:50.569 --> 01:12:53.270
way safe bubbles that way to see if the bubble

01:12:53.270 --> 01:12:56.350
goes through your heart So they have this this

01:12:56.350 --> 01:12:59.069
echo cardiogram again, and they hook you up I

01:12:59.069 --> 01:13:00.909
think to IV or something like that and they throw

01:13:00.909 --> 01:13:03.590
these bubbles through your heart and They see

01:13:03.590 --> 01:13:06.439
if it goes through After six months when I should

01:13:06.439 --> 01:13:10.100
have been healed up the bubble went through So

01:13:10.100 --> 01:13:13.119
they had to tell me then hey, we got a you know,

01:13:13.119 --> 01:13:17.199
you're not you're not good to go. So I had to

01:13:17.199 --> 01:13:20.500
take a year before I can have another surgery

01:13:20.500 --> 01:13:22.760
because one of two because that patch had to

01:13:22.760 --> 01:13:26.479
be completely Completely healed so they can go

01:13:26.479 --> 01:13:28.699
back in time. You knew you had a hole Right,

01:13:28.859 --> 01:13:30.380
so they knew I had a hole because of the heart

01:13:30.380 --> 01:13:32.220
surgery. Right, but all this time, like when

01:13:32.220 --> 01:13:34.079
you're waiting for it to heal, you know you have

01:13:34.079 --> 01:13:36.220
an extra hole. Yes, I know I have a hole. Yes.

01:13:36.220 --> 01:13:37.899
What were you allowed to do with your body then?

01:13:38.159 --> 01:13:39.960
Well, at that time, they go, you know, do how

01:13:39.960 --> 01:13:44.020
you feel comfortable. And so, you know, the hole

01:13:44.020 --> 01:13:46.819
is not going to kill you right now, but you can't

01:13:46.819 --> 01:13:49.020
dive, you can't jump, you pretty much wouldn't

01:13:49.020 --> 01:13:50.640
steal anymore, so I was a recruiter for a period

01:13:50.640 --> 01:13:56.079
of time. So basically, I... Was crazy about that

01:13:56.079 --> 01:13:59.000
is before my second surgery. I was actually training

01:13:59.000 --> 01:14:02.859
for Delta Force I was I I wanted to go to Delta

01:14:02.859 --> 01:14:07.420
and I was rucking ruck running a lot and Before

01:14:07.420 --> 01:14:08.920
my second ruck running mean you're running with

01:14:08.920 --> 01:14:10.600
a pack. Yeah a pack on my back with some weight

01:14:10.600 --> 01:14:13.279
on How heavy is the pack 50 60 pounds and you

01:14:13.279 --> 01:14:15.340
run with that on well? You're supposed to hike

01:14:15.340 --> 01:14:19.079
or hump like ruck humping right I ran with it

01:14:19.079 --> 01:14:21.539
because I went because you know I that's what

01:14:21.539 --> 01:14:25.020
I did right so the day before the day of The

01:14:25.020 --> 01:14:28.560
day of heart surgery, I did a ruck run. Jesus

01:14:28.560 --> 01:14:30.680
Christ. Because I knew I was going to be out

01:14:30.680 --> 01:14:33.840
of commission for a while. So fuck it, man. I'll

01:14:33.840 --> 01:14:36.399
get my last one in, dude. Jesus Christ. So all

01:14:36.399 --> 01:14:38.579
I could do, I have my training log, so after

01:14:38.579 --> 01:14:40.260
my second heart surgery, all I could do was walk.

01:14:40.840 --> 01:14:43.539
So I became an ultra walker. I fucking walked

01:14:43.539 --> 01:14:46.699
my fucking ass off. And over a period of time,

01:14:46.699 --> 01:14:48.319
it took a year for that thing to heal up and

01:14:48.319 --> 01:14:51.060
to heal. You know, my first bubble study after

01:14:51.060 --> 01:14:53.920
my second heart surgery came back negative. or

01:14:53.920 --> 01:14:56.840
positive the bubble went through again oh no

01:14:56.840 --> 01:14:59.699
and they're going to crack me open oh man over

01:14:59.699 --> 01:15:01.680
that period of time my heart healed around that

01:15:01.680 --> 01:15:04.359
thing nicely and i passed the second bubble test

01:15:04.359 --> 01:15:07.100
so the first bubble test was how long after a

01:15:07.100 --> 01:15:08.920
year it was so the first bubble test after the

01:15:08.920 --> 01:15:11.680
first surgery was six months And then you had

01:15:11.680 --> 01:15:13.859
to go through a full six months after that for

01:15:13.859 --> 01:15:15.600
it to totally heal. Then you have the second

01:15:15.600 --> 01:15:17.600
heart surgery. And when does the bubble test

01:15:17.600 --> 01:15:19.880
fail after the second heart surgery? It was about

01:15:19.880 --> 01:15:22.500
six months. Jesus Christ. And the doctor looked

01:15:22.500 --> 01:15:24.699
at me and said, you know, I'm sorry to inform

01:15:24.699 --> 01:15:26.180
you, man. We're going to have to crack your chest

01:15:26.180 --> 01:15:28.880
open the next time we get in there. And so I

01:15:28.880 --> 01:15:30.520
sat back thinking this could be a third heart

01:15:30.520 --> 01:15:35.899
surgery. And then they said we have to wait for

01:15:35.899 --> 01:15:37.699
six months to see if this thing's going to close

01:15:37.699 --> 01:15:40.159
up. Right. And I came back thinking, man, I'm

01:15:40.159 --> 01:15:43.359
about to get cracked the fuck open and that bubble

01:15:43.359 --> 01:15:46.560
got pinned up, man. Wow. Didn't go through. Maybe

01:15:46.560 --> 01:15:48.420
force it through with your mind. I know, right?

01:15:48.500 --> 01:15:51.699
Pulls that pitch up. When you're visualizing.

01:15:51.699 --> 01:15:53.479
That's it, man. That's something to visualize.

01:15:54.260 --> 01:15:57.140
Holy shit, man. That is crazy. It's crazy you

01:15:57.140 --> 01:15:58.819
went on a ruck run with a hole in your heart,

01:15:59.060 --> 01:16:00.880
too. Well, I did it for several years, so I said,

01:16:00.979 --> 01:16:05.680
fuck it. I'm about to keep on going, man. That's

01:16:05.680 --> 01:16:08.460
amazing now after all said and done Everything's

01:16:08.460 --> 01:16:10.600
good now. Yeah, everything I mean, i'm sure something

01:16:10.600 --> 01:16:12.260
must have popped up in my fucking ass not to

01:16:12.260 --> 01:16:14.520
do that, you know Everything's good right now.

01:16:14.800 --> 01:16:16.300
I'm always waiting for the next thing to pop

01:16:16.300 --> 01:16:18.300
up and I handle it the same way I'll attack it.

01:16:18.300 --> 01:16:19.739
But yeah as of right now i'm in the best shape

01:16:19.739 --> 01:16:24.020
at 43 years old just turned 43 february 17th

01:16:24.020 --> 01:16:26.619
I am in The best shape in my life. I'm not knocking

01:16:26.619 --> 01:16:29.619
on wood because life fuck it life comes at you,

01:16:29.699 --> 01:16:31.640
dude So right fucking knocking on wood come at

01:16:31.640 --> 01:16:33.800
me. I mean, I would think that you would be a

01:16:33.800 --> 01:16:37.430
go -to guy for injuries. Like if anybody's had...

01:16:37.430 --> 01:16:40.529
I've had them all, dude. I've had them all. I've

01:16:40.529 --> 01:16:41.970
had them all. When you broke the world record

01:16:41.970 --> 01:16:43.750
for chin -ups, didn't you rip your arm apart?

01:16:43.949 --> 01:16:45.550
Pull -ups, yeah. So if you pull up the picture,

01:16:45.649 --> 01:16:47.430
man, there's a picture of my hand. You'll see,

01:16:47.430 --> 01:16:50.170
I don't know... What is it? Pull -ups are...

01:16:50.170 --> 01:16:52.109
So pull -ups are here. Hands out. Yeah, hands

01:16:52.109 --> 01:16:53.869
out. And chin -ups are hands forward. Right,

01:16:53.869 --> 01:16:56.329
hands forward. So I failed three times. I failed

01:16:56.329 --> 01:16:58.789
twice before I finally got it the third time.

01:16:59.810 --> 01:17:02.689
And the first time I ripped the shit out of my

01:17:02.689 --> 01:17:06.760
forearm, Then the second time you'll see there's

01:17:06.760 --> 01:17:10.579
a picture of my hand and it it's a third degree

01:17:10.579 --> 01:17:15.260
burn. So that's my hand Oh Jesus man, what in

01:17:15.260 --> 01:17:17.579
the fuck is going to look at you a bit by a wolf

01:17:17.579 --> 01:17:19.920
So what's funny about that is you see that uh,

01:17:20.260 --> 01:17:22.979
that doesn't create after one pull -up So if

01:17:22.979 --> 01:17:24.680
you can imagine the pain of because you know,

01:17:24.819 --> 01:17:27.579
you have one contact point. That's it You're

01:17:27.579 --> 01:17:29.680
like running you can overcome it cuz you these

01:17:29.680 --> 01:17:32.640
big giant legs and right it's different when

01:17:32.640 --> 01:17:35.619
you have these little fragile Punk -ass hands

01:17:35.619 --> 01:17:39.699
touching the bar, you know imagine 4030 pull

01:17:39.699 --> 01:17:41.859
-ups how many times you're coming on that bar

01:17:41.859 --> 01:17:45.220
coming off right now way 207 pounds at the time

01:17:45.220 --> 01:17:48.800
so I was a bigger guy I'm like 195 or 185 now

01:17:48.800 --> 01:17:52.199
so I was almost 22 pounds heavier So, I was a

01:17:52.199 --> 01:17:53.979
lot bigger than I am right there. Bam! You look

01:17:53.979 --> 01:17:56.420
pretty thick. Get that shit, man. So, you were

01:17:56.420 --> 01:17:59.899
doing it in sets of five? Sets of five. So, as

01:17:59.899 --> 01:18:02.119
you see, I have these different people who are

01:18:02.119 --> 01:18:05.180
witnessing you. You have to have your number

01:18:05.180 --> 01:18:08.779
there to make sure that you're, you know, qualified

01:18:08.779 --> 01:18:10.260
for the Guinness Book of World Records. That's

01:18:10.260 --> 01:18:12.199
14, 15. I have a long way to go. I have another

01:18:12.199 --> 01:18:17.279
4 ,015 pull -ups to go. Jesus Christ. So yeah,

01:18:17.300 --> 01:18:19.600
and how long did you do this over 24 hours? It

01:18:19.600 --> 01:18:22.939
was seven. So I broke it at 17 Wow, and I was

01:18:22.939 --> 01:18:26.880
fucking over it What did it feel like in the

01:18:26.880 --> 01:18:28.680
last chin up, you know, what actually there's

01:18:28.680 --> 01:18:32.300
a video that we have and I was chasing this guy

01:18:32.300 --> 01:18:35.279
named Steven Highland So this guy named Steven

01:18:35.279 --> 01:18:38.600
Highland had the record and the video is my last

01:18:38.600 --> 01:18:40.399
three pulls for broke the record I'm talking

01:18:40.399 --> 01:18:42.859
so much shit to this motherfucker. I'm like,

01:18:43.000 --> 01:18:44.300
hey motherfucker. You thought I wasn't gonna

01:18:44.300 --> 01:18:46.750
get it, huh? Told you bitch -ass motherfucker.

01:18:46.750 --> 01:18:49.329
I'm coming after you. I'm here now. It's just

01:18:49.329 --> 01:18:51.590
me talking shit It's a cool video, but I felt

01:18:51.590 --> 01:18:54.750
um I felt nothing. I was just happy I have to

01:18:54.750 --> 01:18:58.329
do more I did 67 ,000 pull -ups in nine months

01:18:58.329 --> 01:19:02.890
G in training for a record for 4 ,000 and The

01:19:02.890 --> 01:19:05.649
failures so I did the first time in September

01:19:05.649 --> 01:19:09.149
Failed miserably on this a day, so I did 2 ,588

01:19:09.149 --> 01:19:11.329
or something like that. They'll miss me for millions

01:19:11.329 --> 01:19:15.859
of people two months later November, tried again,

01:19:16.439 --> 01:19:19.880
failed again. Two months later, in January 19th,

01:19:20.359 --> 01:19:23.340
I finally fucking got it. So after I got it,

01:19:23.479 --> 01:19:26.020
it wasn't like I'm happy. It was like I ain't

01:19:26.020 --> 01:19:27.779
got to do more fucking pull -ups anymore, Roger

01:19:27.779 --> 01:19:30.520
that. That's all it was. I had to fucking check

01:19:30.520 --> 01:19:33.520
that bitch off, man. But you were doing them

01:19:33.520 --> 01:19:35.100
when I got here today. You know what? Because

01:19:35.100 --> 01:19:37.220
now it's a part of me, dude. It's a part of me,

01:19:37.579 --> 01:19:39.279
man. Don't like doing them. So we're gonna get

01:19:39.279 --> 01:19:41.100
some we're gonna get we're not some out You don't

01:19:41.100 --> 01:19:42.899
like doing them. So you got to do them. That's

01:19:42.899 --> 01:19:44.739
my whole life Isn't it like someone someone gets

01:19:44.739 --> 01:19:47.439
drunk on a certain whiskey? Like if they smell

01:19:47.439 --> 01:19:50.300
it they'll get disgusted like like Jager meister

01:19:50.300 --> 01:19:52.840
or something like that. They smell it. No, right

01:19:52.840 --> 01:19:54.500
Is that what it's like with you with chin ups

01:19:54.500 --> 01:19:56.619
with a lot of pull -ups with a lot of a lot of

01:19:56.619 --> 01:19:58.220
things Yeah, right. I don't like running out

01:19:58.220 --> 01:19:59.680
like and people don't believe it but you know

01:19:59.680 --> 01:20:04.000
I was I was a big guy twice in my life so hence

01:20:04.000 --> 01:20:06.399
the reason why I Just don't like running, man.

01:20:06.439 --> 01:20:08.300
It hurts. It's brutal. It sucks going out and

01:20:08.300 --> 01:20:10.859
I'm gonna be gone for two hours or I'm gonna

01:20:10.859 --> 01:20:13.479
be gone for 39 hours. Right. Running on a one

01:20:13.479 --> 01:20:17.159
mile track. Fuck, I'm not crazy, man. This shit

01:20:17.159 --> 01:20:19.520
sucks. I mean, you know, people put me in this

01:20:19.520 --> 01:20:22.300
category of you must be some crazy guy who loves

01:20:22.300 --> 01:20:25.739
it. No, man. No, that's why I do it though. That's

01:20:25.739 --> 01:20:27.300
the only way to callous your fucking brain, man.

01:20:27.319 --> 01:20:28.760
It's the only way to get hard in life. People

01:20:28.760 --> 01:20:30.859
take these classes on mental toughness. Like

01:20:30.859 --> 01:20:33.220
even Seals, you have the class about Visualization,

01:20:33.479 --> 01:20:35.500
self -talk, eat an elephant one bite at a time,

01:20:35.659 --> 01:20:38.920
breathing control. Roger that. You gotta put

01:20:38.920 --> 01:20:41.939
yourself in a hellacious situation. It's a lifestyle.

01:20:42.899 --> 01:20:45.460
How are you gonna react? How are you gonna react?

01:20:45.680 --> 01:20:48.300
All that training goes out the fucking door when

01:20:48.300 --> 01:20:50.680
you're in the fucking cold water and you're fucking

01:20:50.680 --> 01:20:53.460
miserable and it's the first hour of 130 hours

01:20:53.460 --> 01:20:55.840
of hell week and that first wave goes over your

01:20:55.840 --> 01:20:57.720
head and you're the coldest you've been in your

01:20:57.720 --> 01:20:59.920
life and your mind goes from hour one to hour

01:20:59.920 --> 01:21:03.039
one fucking 30. All that fucking self -talk and

01:21:03.039 --> 01:21:05.000
shit, dude. You ain't think about anything about

01:21:05.000 --> 01:21:07.079
getting the fuck out of here. But if you live

01:21:07.079 --> 01:21:10.020
this shit on a daily basis and know how to calm

01:21:10.020 --> 01:21:12.760
your mind down, the self -talk will help. All

01:21:12.760 --> 01:21:15.939
that stuff will help. But usually we react. We

01:21:15.939 --> 01:21:18.000
have pain. We have suffering. We react. And we

01:21:18.000 --> 01:21:21.119
react about, get the fuck out of here. We gotta

01:21:21.119 --> 01:21:23.479
go. It's those people who are able to control

01:21:23.479 --> 01:21:26.340
that fucking feeling of fucking flight and say,

01:21:26.560 --> 01:21:28.739
nah motherfucker, there's a way through this.

01:21:29.440 --> 01:21:31.119
It's not gonna be here forever. I'm not cold

01:21:31.119 --> 01:21:33.720
right now. I went through three of them. I'm

01:21:33.720 --> 01:21:36.020
not cold now I'm in a nice warm studio with you.

01:21:36.180 --> 01:21:38.319
You got to think about that shit. It's just gonna

01:21:38.319 --> 01:21:40.600
end It's gonna end but we don't know that we

01:21:40.600 --> 01:21:42.439
don't think that at that time is gonna last forever

01:21:42.439 --> 01:21:44.619
and then you get to sit back on Friday with everybody

01:21:44.619 --> 01:21:47.560
walking across the You know back on the grinder

01:21:47.560 --> 01:21:50.300
all the 16 17 18 guys that graduated Hill week

01:21:50.300 --> 01:21:52.979
and you get a chance to watch these guys victorious

01:21:52.979 --> 01:21:55.180
And then you get the chance think about that

01:21:55.180 --> 01:21:57.949
you take that hot warm shower First thing that

01:21:57.949 --> 01:21:59.310
comes to your fucking mind is why the fuck did

01:21:59.310 --> 01:22:02.729
I quit? So what keeps me going? I've quit several

01:22:02.729 --> 01:22:05.789
things I know what's on the back end of fucking

01:22:05.789 --> 01:22:08.729
quitting It's a lifetime of thinking about why

01:22:08.729 --> 01:22:12.090
the fuck did I do that? And I ain't fucking doing

01:22:12.090 --> 01:22:15.369
that There's something about talking to a guy

01:22:15.369 --> 01:22:18.329
like you that a lot of people hope that you're

01:22:18.329 --> 01:22:20.909
going to say some magic thing that's going to

01:22:20.909 --> 01:22:22.770
click in their brain, and it's going to change

01:22:22.770 --> 01:22:24.850
who they are. Like, what is it? What is the thing?

01:22:24.909 --> 01:22:28.170
That's why people go to these self -help conferences.

01:22:28.970 --> 01:22:32.829
And they take these classes and they hope that

01:22:32.829 --> 01:22:35.430
someone's gonna say something that changes the

01:22:35.430 --> 01:22:37.789
way their mind works It's hilarious to me. It

01:22:37.789 --> 01:22:39.949
is it's kind of hilarious to me, too But what

01:22:39.949 --> 01:22:42.909
is also hilarious is that what you're saying

01:22:42.909 --> 01:22:47.550
is that you have to? Do those things you have

01:22:47.550 --> 01:22:50.130
to suffer you have to live in it you have to

01:22:50.130 --> 01:22:54.449
be comfortable in it and then Maybe some of that

01:22:54.449 --> 01:22:56.189
shit will help you a little bit along the way

01:22:56.189 --> 01:23:00.770
period and I went to When I was a SEAL recruiter,

01:23:00.850 --> 01:23:03.890
I got invited to MIT. Smart -ass motherfuckers

01:23:03.890 --> 01:23:06.489
there, man. I'm not that. I'm just a geranimal.

01:23:06.489 --> 01:23:10.689
I'm a knuckle -draggar. And there was this guy

01:23:10.689 --> 01:23:12.170
there. I forget his name, but he was like the

01:23:12.170 --> 01:23:16.949
top head guy. Old white guy, all geniused out.

01:23:17.250 --> 01:23:20.090
And we were on this panel. And they were asking

01:23:20.090 --> 01:23:22.189
us all these questions about the mind, mental

01:23:22.189 --> 01:23:23.550
toughness, and shit. And he was answering them.

01:23:23.550 --> 01:23:25.810
And I wasn't answering many questions. And I'll

01:23:25.810 --> 01:23:27.529
never forget, he was just answering them off

01:23:27.529 --> 01:23:30.300
of theory. Mmm, he never put his fucking ass

01:23:30.300 --> 01:23:32.960
in shit You read a bunch of fucking books and

01:23:32.960 --> 01:23:34.560
you think that you know how the fucking mind

01:23:34.560 --> 01:23:36.619
works and shit I had gone through hell since

01:23:36.619 --> 01:23:39.760
a kid and then all the way up until now, right?

01:23:39.819 --> 01:23:44.699
So I know So that theory is bullshit. Yeah, there's

01:23:44.699 --> 01:23:46.399
a lot of good stuff out there You can read from

01:23:46.399 --> 01:23:50.539
people but I had lived hell and when you put

01:23:50.539 --> 01:23:53.119
yourself in hell That's the only time you can

01:23:53.119 --> 01:23:55.279
figure out how the fuck to get through that motherfucker.

01:23:55.460 --> 01:23:58.899
You can't read somebody else's book about some

01:23:58.899 --> 01:24:00.880
theory on how to do shit. Some guy who sat up

01:24:00.880 --> 01:24:04.279
in their nice warm office and wrote some book

01:24:04.279 --> 01:24:05.960
with a nice cup of coffee in the fucking hand.

01:24:06.060 --> 01:24:10.640
No. I want to see that guy who immersed himself

01:24:10.640 --> 01:24:13.520
in fucking hell and he thought about quitting

01:24:13.520 --> 01:24:16.159
and leaving and his wife and his kids and why

01:24:16.159 --> 01:24:19.579
am I here? Is it worth it? All this crazy shit

01:24:19.579 --> 01:24:23.250
is still said. and found out a way to get through

01:24:23.250 --> 01:24:27.529
it. So basically that's the bottom line of it

01:24:27.529 --> 01:24:30.970
all. We all want to read about how we can quickly

01:24:30.970 --> 01:24:33.350
get somewhere. That's why the six minute abs

01:24:33.350 --> 01:24:36.609
and all that sort of shit is so powerful. You

01:24:36.609 --> 01:24:38.449
may get some results from it, but they're not

01:24:38.449 --> 01:24:42.170
permanent. The permanent result comes from you

01:24:42.170 --> 01:24:45.890
fucking, I say it all the time, you have to suffer.

01:24:46.830 --> 01:24:50.050
You have to make that a tattoo on your fucking

01:24:50.050 --> 01:24:53.350
brain. So when that hard time comes again, you

01:24:53.350 --> 01:24:56.750
don't forget it You may forget it for a second,

01:24:56.750 --> 01:24:58.510
but you can go back in the cookie jar. I call

01:24:58.510 --> 01:25:01.470
it. It's a It's something that we've all endured

01:25:01.470 --> 01:25:03.890
I call it the cookie jar and we often forget

01:25:03.890 --> 01:25:06.630
how hard we are but you gotta reflect back take

01:25:06.630 --> 01:25:08.270
a couple seconds reflect I've been through this

01:25:08.270 --> 01:25:10.569
I've been through that and then remind yourself.

01:25:10.569 --> 01:25:14.130
I'm a bad motherfucker and Then you can get through

01:25:14.130 --> 01:25:16.569
that shit. But if you don't believe it You ever

01:25:16.569 --> 01:25:20.090
endured shit? You're just blowing smoke, man.

01:25:20.350 --> 01:25:21.409
And you're not gonna get through anything. What

01:25:21.409 --> 01:25:23.649
was this guy saying? Like what was his theories

01:25:23.649 --> 01:25:25.050
that he was throwing out there? His theories

01:25:25.050 --> 01:25:27.090
was about, I forget exactly what it was, but

01:25:27.090 --> 01:25:29.470
it was something about what the mind does under

01:25:29.470 --> 01:25:33.989
stress. And how we can't, he said how we can't

01:25:33.989 --> 01:25:38.590
do something. And I did it. I did what he said

01:25:38.590 --> 01:25:40.310
we couldn't do. Like what was he saying he couldn't

01:25:40.310 --> 01:25:44.850
do? It was something about if you're born, If

01:25:44.850 --> 01:25:48.390
you're born a certain way, if you're born a certain

01:25:48.390 --> 01:25:53.069
way, you can't become this way. It was totally

01:25:53.069 --> 01:25:56.630
saying that who I am now, like I had to be born

01:25:56.630 --> 01:26:01.350
with some, not genetic power or some gift from

01:26:01.350 --> 01:26:03.590
God, but I had to have some kind of special gift.

01:26:04.449 --> 01:26:05.470
I had to have some kind of special gift. And

01:26:05.470 --> 01:26:07.770
I forget what set me off, but it was that we

01:26:07.770 --> 01:26:11.069
had to be, to be somewhere, you had to be born

01:26:11.069 --> 01:26:14.210
with it. What was the concept and I know what

01:26:14.210 --> 01:26:18.050
I was born with and I know the battle that I

01:26:18.050 --> 01:26:21.350
had in my mind So when he said it I just sat

01:26:21.350 --> 01:26:22.529
there look at my face and somebody the crowd

01:26:22.529 --> 01:26:25.289
asked me a question And I totally contradicted

01:26:25.289 --> 01:26:27.710
everything he said and I was like nah, man I

01:26:27.710 --> 01:26:31.430
mean I fucking know for a fact that you can be

01:26:31.430 --> 01:26:35.729
this fucked up, dude Like really fucked up dude

01:26:35.729 --> 01:26:40.439
and with the right mindset It sounds so easy

01:26:40.439 --> 01:26:43.760
with the right mindset doesn't sound easy I know

01:26:43.760 --> 01:26:45.399
what you're saying. It sounds very simplistic

01:26:45.399 --> 01:26:49.319
answer right you can You can but you have to

01:26:49.319 --> 01:26:52.199
go into those dark chambers that we often shut

01:26:52.199 --> 01:26:54.600
off You got to open them up you got open up and

01:26:54.600 --> 01:26:57.000
fight that fucking demon Get in there talk to

01:26:57.000 --> 01:26:59.840
that motherfucker say what's up? And we often

01:26:59.840 --> 01:27:02.420
take the we all like to take this four lane highway

01:27:02.420 --> 01:27:06.319
the easy highway has It has fucking signs, it

01:27:06.319 --> 01:27:09.239
has restaurants. We all love that four lane highway.

01:27:09.640 --> 01:27:13.060
We always step over the shovel. And all I did

01:27:13.060 --> 01:27:15.300
was I picked up that fucking shovel, and that

01:27:15.300 --> 01:27:17.899
shovel, I made my own path. And you may have

01:27:17.899 --> 01:27:20.239
big boulders and shit, they may be getting 200

01:27:20.239 --> 01:27:22.659
miles up the road faster than you, but going

01:27:22.659 --> 01:27:24.600
through this path of life, this journey over

01:27:24.600 --> 01:27:27.279
here that you make yourself, that's incredibly

01:27:27.279 --> 01:27:30.159
difficult. What comes out the other end of that

01:27:30.159 --> 01:27:32.800
motherfucker is some glorious shit that you can't

01:27:32.800 --> 01:27:36.439
even explain to people. And we're afraid. Bottom

01:27:36.439 --> 01:27:37.840
line is most of us, even the people who have

01:27:37.840 --> 01:27:41.039
all these theories and shit, it's easier to accept

01:27:41.039 --> 01:27:45.079
the fact that I'm just not good enough. I wasn't

01:27:45.079 --> 01:27:47.500
made to do that. And yeah, some of us can't be

01:27:47.500 --> 01:27:50.199
LeBron fucking James. But I'll tell you right

01:27:50.199 --> 01:27:52.300
now, man, we can do a lot of shit when it comes

01:27:52.300 --> 01:27:54.720
to this pure arm guts and willpower and getting

01:27:54.720 --> 01:27:57.119
through shit. We have a lot more with a lot.

01:27:57.239 --> 01:27:59.319
more than we think we have. Yeah, the problem

01:27:59.319 --> 01:28:01.220
with a guy like that, with his theory, is that

01:28:01.220 --> 01:28:03.159
his theories are based on results. And those

01:28:03.159 --> 01:28:05.539
results are based on human beings. And most human

01:28:05.539 --> 01:28:07.399
beings, there's certain people that are born

01:28:07.399 --> 01:28:09.640
with certain gifts, like a guy like LeBron James,

01:28:10.119 --> 01:28:12.399
obvious physical talent. You know, John Jones

01:28:12.399 --> 01:28:16.600
in MMA, obvious physical talent. But there's...

01:28:16.600 --> 01:28:20.220
When you look at someone who's super successful,

01:28:20.600 --> 01:28:23.439
you always assume... that it has to be because

01:28:23.439 --> 01:28:25.640
of some sort of physical gifts because people

01:28:25.640 --> 01:28:29.119
look at themselves and I'm sure this doctor this

01:28:29.119 --> 01:28:31.699
old dude probably had like a little gut and probably

01:28:31.699 --> 01:28:34.380
exactly how he looked little tiny arms and weak

01:28:34.380 --> 01:28:36.920
shoulders and probably thought well there's certain

01:28:36.920 --> 01:28:38.800
people that are just mesomorphic and probably

01:28:38.800 --> 01:28:40.699
broke it down all these scientific terms right

01:28:40.699 --> 01:28:43.420
you know they they they just have a fast twitch

01:28:43.420 --> 01:28:45.439
muscle fibers and they'll say all this crazy

01:28:45.439 --> 01:28:48.979
shit that is true at the very highest levels

01:28:48.979 --> 01:28:51.399
of the winners right But it doesn't mean that

01:28:51.399 --> 01:28:53.819
you can't become that. No. It just means that

01:28:53.819 --> 01:28:55.880
it's too painful for most people to go through.

01:28:56.079 --> 01:28:57.819
So very few people ever get there. So if you

01:28:57.819 --> 01:29:00.260
look at the actual results, he would be correct.

01:29:00.439 --> 01:29:03.199
But he's not correct because he doesn't take

01:29:03.199 --> 01:29:05.640
the shovel. Exactly. That's the moral of the

01:29:05.640 --> 01:29:08.819
story. Does not some easy lit up street life

01:29:08.819 --> 01:29:12.079
path with nice smooth roads. That's right. It's

01:29:12.079 --> 01:29:13.859
a difficult motherfucker where you're going to

01:29:13.859 --> 01:29:16.220
fail and you're going to be in your head. You

01:29:16.220 --> 01:29:18.539
could be saying, I'm not good enough. And it's

01:29:18.539 --> 01:29:21.229
how you get through that. how you get through

01:29:21.229 --> 01:29:23.409
that on a daily basis when that thing is saying

01:29:23.409 --> 01:29:28.350
man I'm 43 I've done so much you start to become

01:29:28.350 --> 01:29:31.390
civilized the refrigerator gets full you start

01:29:31.390 --> 01:29:35.090
making money and you start I'm not getting cold

01:29:35.090 --> 01:29:39.189
anymore I'm retired once in at 40 people shouldn't

01:29:39.189 --> 01:29:42.010
be playing basketball or football or beating

01:29:42.010 --> 01:29:45.319
you start to believe this shit It becomes in

01:29:45.319 --> 01:29:47.199
your fucking mind like there's people who are

01:29:47.199 --> 01:29:48.979
retiring, you know at 40 something years old

01:29:48.979 --> 01:29:51.319
or 30 something years old at 43 I'm still putting

01:29:51.319 --> 01:29:53.979
a hundred mile weeks still doing thousands of

01:29:53.979 --> 01:29:56.779
pull -ups do thousands of push -ups Because I'm

01:29:56.779 --> 01:29:59.479
not allowing myself to become civilized the worst

01:29:59.479 --> 01:30:01.659
thing that happened to a man has become civilized

01:30:01.659 --> 01:30:05.100
You lose that fucking fight. You lose that why

01:30:05.100 --> 01:30:08.800
the fuck am I doing this shit? I'm good You ain't

01:30:08.800 --> 01:30:11.930
good man. You ain't never fucking arrived And

01:30:11.930 --> 01:30:13.529
that's just my mentality. You may have more,

01:30:13.550 --> 01:30:15.550
but you never fucking arrive. You want to be

01:30:15.550 --> 01:30:20.029
uncommon amongst uncommon people. Period. Uncommon

01:30:20.029 --> 01:30:22.250
amongst uncommon people is one of the greatest

01:30:22.250 --> 01:30:27.109
ways to put it. That's it. For me, what got me

01:30:27.109 --> 01:30:29.770
in trouble with the Navy SEALs is I wanted to

01:30:29.770 --> 01:30:33.970
be one so bad. So bad, I fought my ass off. And

01:30:33.970 --> 01:30:36.810
I saw them as uncommon people. Very uncommon.

01:30:37.250 --> 01:30:39.829
But once you become a Navy SEAL, You're all Navy

01:30:39.829 --> 01:30:41.270
SEALs, so guess what happens? You're fucking

01:30:41.270 --> 01:30:45.390
common again. I wanted to be uncommon amongst

01:30:45.390 --> 01:30:49.149
uncommon people. I wanted to be the guy, I don't

01:30:49.149 --> 01:30:50.229
care if you fucking like me, I don't care if

01:30:50.229 --> 01:30:52.010
you don't understand me. I didn't give a fuck.

01:30:52.090 --> 01:30:53.789
Once I went through this fucking journey, this

01:30:53.789 --> 01:30:56.229
path of life, you ain't got a whole bunch of

01:30:56.229 --> 01:30:58.130
fucking guys that don't fucking like me. I don't

01:30:58.130 --> 01:31:01.430
give a fuck. I'm a warrior. Period. There's a

01:31:01.430 --> 01:31:02.970
lot of guys that have been in a lot more combat

01:31:02.970 --> 01:31:07.210
than me. A warrior's not always that. A warrior's

01:31:07.210 --> 01:31:09.720
a motherfucker who says, hey, I'm here again

01:31:09.720 --> 01:31:12.199
today. I'm here again tomorrow. I'm going to

01:31:12.199 --> 01:31:14.560
be here the next day. I'm 50 years old. I'm still

01:31:14.560 --> 01:31:16.500
fucking getting after it. It's a person that

01:31:16.500 --> 01:31:19.520
puts no fucking limit on what's possible. And

01:31:19.520 --> 01:31:21.279
that's what got me in trouble a lot. That's why

01:31:21.279 --> 01:31:23.399
I went to Ranger school as a SEAL. That's why

01:31:23.399 --> 01:31:26.560
I try to go to Delta Force twice. I've been through

01:31:26.560 --> 01:31:28.140
all these different training programs, because

01:31:28.140 --> 01:31:31.439
I was looking for, in the military what I saw

01:31:31.439 --> 01:31:35.300
is, in the training, these people get their ass

01:31:35.300 --> 01:31:37.649
handed to them. After they get out a lot of them

01:31:37.649 --> 01:31:41.590
get civilized. I Always wanted to go back into

01:31:41.590 --> 01:31:43.949
training No matter where I was at I wanted to

01:31:43.949 --> 01:31:46.270
go back to war and the war was in that training

01:31:46.270 --> 01:31:48.750
program Where you see guys who can quit guys

01:31:48.750 --> 01:31:50.590
who are brutal guys who are suffering guys who

01:31:50.590 --> 01:31:53.590
are you go? So as a CEO you don't volunteer for

01:31:53.590 --> 01:31:56.329
Ranger school I did I put in seven chips got

01:31:56.329 --> 01:31:58.470
turned down my eighth get you know got accepted.

01:31:58.770 --> 01:32:03.069
I went at 28 29 years old and They go why did

01:32:03.069 --> 01:32:05.590
you go? Because I started becoming civilized.

01:32:05.609 --> 01:32:09.010
I started becoming complacent. I Need to get

01:32:09.010 --> 01:32:11.430
my fucking ass kicked again And when you go as

01:32:11.430 --> 01:32:13.710
a seal going down to you have no rank in Ranger

01:32:13.710 --> 01:32:16.609
school, you could be a major You're just fucking

01:32:16.609 --> 01:32:20.090
Joe Brown. You're nobody and you're not eating

01:32:20.090 --> 01:32:22.489
you're not sleeping So I always would put myself

01:32:22.489 --> 01:32:24.770
I would immerse myself in shit like that. Even

01:32:24.770 --> 01:32:27.750
I would climb the ladder And I intentionally

01:32:27.750 --> 01:32:29.869
fall back down that motherfucker to say all right,

01:32:29.869 --> 01:32:34.189
man Getting soft dude getting soft Kick your

01:32:34.189 --> 01:32:37.090
fucking ass again. Yeah, you know it's kind of

01:32:37.090 --> 01:32:39.369
the process Did you find resistance from that

01:32:39.369 --> 01:32:42.369
amongst other guys? That didn't like to make

01:32:42.369 --> 01:32:44.109
that you were making them uncomfortable because

01:32:44.109 --> 01:32:46.890
that is something that people There's a natural

01:32:46.890 --> 01:32:48.829
instinct that people have when someone's working

01:32:48.829 --> 01:32:50.930
harder than them to somehow another diminish

01:32:50.930 --> 01:32:53.729
that person Well, I know that a lot of guys don't

01:32:53.729 --> 01:32:56.170
want me for a lot of reasons and I realize that

01:32:56.170 --> 01:32:58.649
I am a guy that doesn't care if you like me or

01:32:58.649 --> 01:33:01.630
not and When you're an alpha male and you're

01:33:01.630 --> 01:33:04.989
against other alpha males and we eat our own

01:33:04.989 --> 01:33:08.590
alpha males eat their own and i love that shit

01:33:08.590 --> 01:33:11.710
let's fucking go man i want to eat hey man i'm

01:33:11.710 --> 01:33:14.189
all about that kind of mentality but i would

01:33:14.189 --> 01:33:16.529
sometimes take it to another level you know i

01:33:16.529 --> 01:33:18.689
wasn't part of a of a good old boy network i

01:33:18.689 --> 01:33:20.569
didn't want to be part i wanted to be david fucking

01:33:20.569 --> 01:33:24.229
goggins for too long in my life and it got me

01:33:24.229 --> 01:33:25.609
in trouble for too long in my life i wanted to

01:33:25.609 --> 01:33:29.449
be accepted growing up Lied I fucking did what

01:33:29.449 --> 01:33:32.729
I could if you fucking like UFC and I didn't

01:33:32.729 --> 01:33:35.470
I love it I love it man. Let's go fucking watch

01:33:35.470 --> 01:33:38.310
me be my friend be my buddy that fucking weak

01:33:38.310 --> 01:33:41.390
-ass shit I found out through this path of life.

01:33:41.630 --> 01:33:46.149
Who is David Goggins? Who am I? So going through

01:33:46.149 --> 01:33:49.050
all I did it alone There was no fucking trophy

01:33:49.050 --> 01:33:50.869
on the fucking wall the mantle that trophies

01:33:50.869 --> 01:33:53.479
in my fucking brain No one helped me get to know

01:33:53.479 --> 01:33:55.180
my pay my fucking bills. No one did shit for

01:33:55.180 --> 01:33:57.119
me No one ran those fucking miles lost that fucking

01:33:57.119 --> 01:33:59.699
weight with look I suffered on my own and developed

01:33:59.699 --> 01:34:03.640
this man who said it's who I am man a very competitive

01:34:03.640 --> 01:34:06.539
ultra competitive do that Take it what you want,

01:34:06.539 --> 01:34:10.119
man. I call that personal sovereignty Exactly.

01:34:10.180 --> 01:34:12.140
There's not a lot of people that have that that's

01:34:12.140 --> 01:34:14.659
me There's a lot of people that change who they

01:34:14.659 --> 01:34:17.439
are depending upon what people want from them

01:34:17.439 --> 01:34:20.050
and that's that's me. Yeah That's important,

01:34:20.270 --> 01:34:22.409
man. And most people struggle their whole life

01:34:22.409 --> 01:34:25.189
to find out who they are. Struggle their whole

01:34:25.189 --> 01:34:27.670
life to find out what defines them, what they

01:34:27.670 --> 01:34:29.390
actually enjoy, and what they don't. You start

01:34:29.390 --> 01:34:31.850
putting yourself in situations that suck, you'll

01:34:31.850 --> 01:34:34.270
find yourself. Yeah. You'll find it real quick.

01:34:34.470 --> 01:34:36.170
That is the thing, right? And that's one of the

01:34:36.170 --> 01:34:38.029
things that I've gotten from paying attention

01:34:38.029 --> 01:34:42.310
to you is that what you're preaching, what you're

01:34:42.310 --> 01:34:44.729
talking about is finding yourself through struggle.

01:34:44.850 --> 01:34:46.800
That's it. It's the only way to find yourself.

01:34:47.239 --> 01:34:48.920
You don't find yourself. If you like bench pressing,

01:34:49.279 --> 01:34:50.699
and you bench press all the fucking time, what

01:34:50.699 --> 01:34:53.479
are you finding out? If you like to swim, that's

01:34:53.479 --> 01:34:55.979
all you want to do is swim, what are you finding

01:34:55.979 --> 01:35:01.140
out? People talk about triple down on your fucking

01:35:01.140 --> 01:35:03.479
strengths. That's the fucking weakest shit in

01:35:03.479 --> 01:35:06.850
the world. No. Triple down on your fucking weaknesses.

01:35:07.050 --> 01:35:09.109
Yeah, find out something about yourself. You

01:35:09.109 --> 01:35:10.569
already know that the good shit You already know

01:35:10.569 --> 01:35:12.989
the happy shit, right? That's why I'm I on my

01:35:12.989 --> 01:35:15.109
face because well, don't you talk about good

01:35:15.109 --> 01:35:17.069
times? You know how to get through that shit

01:35:17.069 --> 01:35:20.750
motherfucker You don't need a fucking you you

01:35:20.750 --> 01:35:22.210
don't need no one tell you how to get to that's

01:35:22.210 --> 01:35:25.029
happy, right? That's easy shit, right? I'm gonna

01:35:25.029 --> 01:35:27.470
tell you how you can help yourself get through

01:35:27.470 --> 01:35:31.149
the times that suck real life This is real life

01:35:31.149 --> 01:35:34.979
90 % of your life will suck Ten percent will

01:35:34.979 --> 01:35:37.699
be fucking happy. You may be lucky guy and have

01:35:37.699 --> 01:35:39.239
a lot of fucking money have a great ass woman

01:35:39.239 --> 01:35:42.000
all this shit Trust me one -on -one with that

01:35:42.000 --> 01:35:44.579
fucking guy. He's missing something His life

01:35:44.579 --> 01:35:46.619
still sucks because he hasn't faced something

01:35:46.619 --> 01:35:49.079
that bothered him his whole fucking life Something

01:35:49.079 --> 01:35:52.119
still eating that motherfucker up almost everybody

01:35:52.119 --> 01:35:54.800
everybody eating you the fuck up But maybe you

01:35:54.800 --> 01:35:57.939
found a good way how I did growing up on how

01:35:57.939 --> 01:36:01.300
to ignore that voice as saying You ain't facing

01:36:01.300 --> 01:36:04.819
some shit Period man. I'm not special. I just

01:36:04.819 --> 01:36:08.300
stopped listening. I listened to that voice It

01:36:08.300 --> 01:36:10.720
was why I talked so fucking aggressive people

01:36:10.720 --> 01:36:13.300
said man. Do you believe in God you cuss so much?

01:36:14.119 --> 01:36:18.600
When I say fuck It's it's letting you know what

01:36:18.600 --> 01:36:21.579
I'm thinking if I try to make it all pretty and

01:36:21.579 --> 01:36:25.100
shit. That's not what my life was It was a violent

01:36:25.100 --> 01:36:29.420
violent struggle daily To get where I'm at today.

01:36:29.960 --> 01:36:32.020
I'm not gonna water it down I'm not gonna water

01:36:32.020 --> 01:36:34.859
it down. This shit wasn't fun. It ain't fun today.

01:36:35.640 --> 01:36:39.840
But I'm happy. Don't you think that your happiness

01:36:39.840 --> 01:36:44.560
is probably elevated by the amount of pain that

01:36:44.560 --> 01:36:47.279
you've gone through? 100%. So the amount of suffering

01:36:47.279 --> 01:36:49.239
that you understand, the amount of pain that

01:36:49.239 --> 01:36:51.920
you've gone through makes you appreciate the

01:36:51.920 --> 01:36:54.720
happiness and the beautiful moments with much

01:36:54.720 --> 01:36:56.659
more intensity? That's what weak people miss

01:36:56.659 --> 01:36:59.970
about my story. Weak people hear this soft kid.

01:36:59.970 --> 01:37:01.989
Oh my god. He must be miserable. Oh my god What

01:37:01.989 --> 01:37:03.829
the hell is wrong with him? You're missing the

01:37:03.829 --> 01:37:06.770
fucking story. You're not listening to the story,

01:37:06.770 --> 01:37:12.010
man Look what I overcame If that is a put some

01:37:12.010 --> 01:37:14.229
badge of honor tattooed in your fucking brain

01:37:14.229 --> 01:37:16.750
for the rest of your life You can die today talking

01:37:16.750 --> 01:37:20.789
to Joe Rogan You're missing the story man. Am

01:37:20.789 --> 01:37:23.500
I happy? What the fuck do you think? Don't miss

01:37:23.500 --> 01:37:25.420
it. Don't misunderstand the passion in which

01:37:25.420 --> 01:37:29.020
I speak for not being intensely happy happiest

01:37:29.020 --> 01:37:33.319
person in the world But I'm not done So not gonna

01:37:33.319 --> 01:37:35.539
speak to you like oh, man. Everything is great.

01:37:35.619 --> 01:37:39.199
No, I have a lot more shit to do a lot more shit

01:37:39.199 --> 01:37:42.060
to do Well, this is in the same use of the word

01:37:42.060 --> 01:37:45.260
that you used the warrior's mentality the warrior's

01:37:45.260 --> 01:37:48.760
life, right? This is this is the way that you

01:37:48.760 --> 01:37:51.899
can keep balanced and sane right and and keep

01:37:52.650 --> 01:37:56.090
good grip on who you are period and like there's

01:37:56.090 --> 01:37:57.989
a quote that was said I don't know who said it

01:37:57.989 --> 01:38:01.789
but it was a great quote this guy said going

01:38:01.789 --> 01:38:04.390
into combat going into war out of the hundred

01:38:04.390 --> 01:38:06.970
men that go into war ten shouldn't even fucking

01:38:06.970 --> 01:38:12.270
be there 80 of them are just targets ten do most

01:38:12.270 --> 01:38:15.609
or nine do most of fighting one is a warrior

01:38:15.609 --> 01:38:21.119
and it's a true quote to life Saw it going through

01:38:21.119 --> 01:38:23.260
training. I saw it everywhere. I went there's

01:38:23.260 --> 01:38:26.399
so many people who just show up to life that

01:38:26.399 --> 01:38:29.060
shouldn't even fucking be around and There's

01:38:29.060 --> 01:38:30.979
a few people do all the work. I wanted to be

01:38:30.979 --> 01:38:34.279
part of that nine and I'm working towards being

01:38:34.279 --> 01:38:37.079
that one and That's just how I live my life.

01:38:37.439 --> 01:38:38.880
Now. What are you doing with your life these

01:38:38.880 --> 01:38:42.800
days right now? I keep the same. I'm very routine.

01:38:43.119 --> 01:38:46.539
I get every morning I run I go to the gym and

01:38:46.539 --> 01:38:49.899
then at nighttime I stretch out I am Just trying

01:38:49.899 --> 01:38:52.300
to develop a business, costing me a lot of money

01:38:52.300 --> 01:38:54.760
trying to do that. I'm just getting out. I'm

01:38:54.760 --> 01:38:57.539
an introvert. So I never want to get on social

01:38:57.539 --> 01:39:01.300
media. I'm not big on that. I'm big on being

01:39:01.300 --> 01:39:06.439
with yourself. I believe all these fucking cameras

01:39:06.439 --> 01:39:09.359
and phones and shit. It takes you away from the

01:39:09.359 --> 01:39:11.100
most powerful thing in the world, which is your

01:39:11.100 --> 01:39:14.479
fucking mind. So I try hard to continue to grow

01:39:14.479 --> 01:39:16.720
that I'm trying to break a record again I'm trying

01:39:16.720 --> 01:39:19.239
to cross Death Valley as fast as possible top

01:39:19.239 --> 01:39:22.199
of Mount Whitney and I'm constantly trying to

01:39:22.199 --> 01:39:23.579
put goals in for me, but the biggest thing is

01:39:23.579 --> 01:39:26.260
I'm trying to find more of myself and only way

01:39:26.260 --> 01:39:28.680
I can find more is to silence the world out as

01:39:28.680 --> 01:39:31.020
much as I can because it's getting busier every

01:39:31.020 --> 01:39:34.020
day it's getting faster and the faster it gets

01:39:34.020 --> 01:39:37.300
the more you are Missing who the fuck you are

01:39:37.760 --> 01:39:40.319
So I trap my own mind a lot and say look man

01:39:40.319 --> 01:39:42.619
I put my phone away I put shit away and I go

01:39:42.619 --> 01:39:45.699
dark I go dark a lot and it's because I have

01:39:45.699 --> 01:39:48.800
to find out I'm on a journey of life and we all

01:39:48.800 --> 01:39:50.920
have a different journey and I want to be in

01:39:50.920 --> 01:39:53.539
my fucking pine box and I believe your spirit

01:39:53.539 --> 01:39:55.699
lives forever has to it's too fucking powerful

01:39:55.699 --> 01:39:58.399
no way in hell that thing just dies when you

01:39:58.399 --> 01:40:00.899
die I want to be able to look back on my life

01:40:00.899 --> 01:40:02.600
when I'm all dead and be so fucking proud of

01:40:02.600 --> 01:40:06.279
myself forever this is all temporary shit to

01:40:06.279 --> 01:40:09.039
me I want to be forever proud of who I was as

01:40:09.039 --> 01:40:13.279
a man and change who I used to be. The liar,

01:40:13.520 --> 01:40:15.779
the insecure guy, the guy who can, whatever.

01:40:15.960 --> 01:40:18.119
I want to be proud. If I die now, if I die at

01:40:18.119 --> 01:40:19.819
80, if I die at 90, 100, I want to look at myself

01:40:19.819 --> 01:40:25.520
and say, proud of myself. because you've gone

01:40:25.520 --> 01:40:27.960
through so much struggle, you appreciate happiness,

01:40:28.220 --> 01:40:30.539
true happiness. Do you think that you appreciate

01:40:30.539 --> 01:40:32.579
discipline because you weren't disciplined? Do

01:40:32.579 --> 01:40:34.539
you think you appreciate the hard work you put

01:40:34.539 --> 01:40:36.819
in because you used to be weak? Yes, I appreciate

01:40:36.819 --> 01:40:39.640
self -discipline. Yes. I never had, and the crazy

01:40:39.640 --> 01:40:42.079
thing about, you know, you say that, I didn't

01:40:42.079 --> 01:40:44.600
have a motherfucker come wake me up at three

01:40:44.600 --> 01:40:45.720
o 'clock in the fucking morning and say, hey,

01:40:45.760 --> 01:40:47.600
you gotta get your shit in. I had no trainer.

01:40:48.199 --> 01:40:51.279
I didn't have a nutritionist. It was the self

01:40:51.279 --> 01:40:53.859
-discipline that I had to survive, not survive,

01:40:53.899 --> 01:40:58.119
I was weak, to thrive. No one said, hey man,

01:40:58.220 --> 01:41:01.939
you're 297 pounds, man. I'm gonna help you out.

01:41:02.560 --> 01:41:04.119
I'm gonna help, hey man, you're fucking, you're

01:41:04.119 --> 01:41:08.680
not smart. I'm gonna help you out. I had to work

01:41:08.680 --> 01:41:15.359
at all this shit. I had to overcome. Self -discipline

01:41:15.359 --> 01:41:17.539
is everything. If you don't have it, I don't

01:41:17.539 --> 01:41:19.000
look at you right, because I know you're capable

01:41:19.000 --> 01:41:21.859
of more. It's not discipline so much for me.

01:41:22.180 --> 01:41:26.579
It's all on you. It's all on you. The self part

01:41:26.579 --> 01:41:29.720
is what's big. We need someone to hold people

01:41:29.720 --> 01:41:33.579
accountable. Fuck that shit, man. Fuck that shit.

01:41:33.880 --> 01:41:37.180
We count on people too much to get us through

01:41:37.180 --> 01:41:39.800
shit. And we look to our right, we look to our

01:41:39.800 --> 01:41:41.720
left, we're looking for help. And if you can

01:41:41.720 --> 01:41:45.000
build that self, you can build that total accountability

01:41:45.000 --> 01:41:48.399
in one self. And it's not about being selfish.

01:41:48.810 --> 01:41:51.409
I'm trying to create a better me. So hopefully

01:41:51.409 --> 01:41:53.069
people who are hearing this are taking it the

01:41:53.069 --> 01:41:56.829
right way. You can say I Can run a mile ain't

01:41:56.829 --> 01:41:58.909
about running 205 fucking miles doing fourth

01:41:58.909 --> 01:42:01.090
arc being a city about all that shit shit doesn't

01:42:01.090 --> 01:42:04.430
matter I want you to see how fucking far you

01:42:04.430 --> 01:42:08.310
can go and that's all it's about yourself and

01:42:08.310 --> 01:42:10.250
That's where it all comes from Wilson I guarantee

01:42:10.250 --> 01:42:12.789
you've already done that what you experienced

01:42:12.789 --> 01:42:15.750
from watching that television show and what what

01:42:15.750 --> 01:42:18.770
got you out the door what got you to sort of

01:42:18.729 --> 01:42:20.930
take the first steps to change your life. What

01:42:20.930 --> 01:42:24.569
you experience by watching Rocky, those moments

01:42:24.569 --> 01:42:27.090
of inspiration, those are critical for people.

01:42:27.189 --> 01:42:28.970
They need to know that someone's done something,

01:42:29.069 --> 01:42:30.810
that someone's done something that's greater

01:42:30.810 --> 01:42:32.970
than what they can imagine themselves doing,

01:42:33.090 --> 01:42:36.189
and they want to take a step towards trying to

01:42:36.189 --> 01:42:39.609
be better. That inspiration is gigantic, and

01:42:39.609 --> 01:42:42.710
sometimes it comes across as corny. People read

01:42:42.710 --> 01:42:47.920
too much of it online. It drowns out. You lose

01:42:47.920 --> 01:42:50.100
that the meaning gets lost. I mean, there's and

01:42:50.100 --> 01:42:52.159
there's a lot of posers. There's a lot of people

01:42:52.159 --> 01:42:55.239
out there that are They're pretending that they're

01:42:55.239 --> 01:42:57.779
trying to offer up inspiration or a true honest

01:42:57.779 --> 01:43:00.220
account of their experiences But really what

01:43:00.220 --> 01:43:02.399
they're trying to do is say something that's

01:43:02.399 --> 01:43:04.460
gonna get likes, right? You know, they're trying

01:43:04.460 --> 01:43:06.300
to say things that they think people are gonna

01:43:06.300 --> 01:43:08.819
go. Yeah double high -five, right? You know,

01:43:08.859 --> 01:43:11.159
there's a thing that people are doing when they're

01:43:11.159 --> 01:43:14.960
just trying to just Get social cred. That's it.

01:43:14.960 --> 01:43:17.460
Yeah social media is man. I'm gonna paint you

01:43:17.460 --> 01:43:20.260
the picture of my fake life, right? Right, I

01:43:20.260 --> 01:43:22.699
paint you a picture of my fucking real life Yeah.

01:43:22.899 --> 01:43:26.140
Period. Like it or not, man. But that real life

01:43:26.140 --> 01:43:29.439
is fuel for people. It's fuel for me. I mean,

01:43:29.600 --> 01:43:32.279
I love that shit. I live off of it. There's a

01:43:32.279 --> 01:43:34.319
lot of people that I follow online, and you're

01:43:34.319 --> 01:43:37.539
one of them, that I can get something out of

01:43:37.539 --> 01:43:40.020
that. I could watch a short clip of you talking.

01:43:40.100 --> 01:43:42.300
I'm sure clips of this podcast, people are gonna

01:43:42.300 --> 01:43:44.359
play these clips and go for fucking crazy runs

01:43:44.359 --> 01:43:46.699
afterwards. Right. Well, I hope so. Fuck yeah,

01:43:46.779 --> 01:43:48.579
they're gonna. You don't even have to hope. It's

01:43:48.579 --> 01:43:50.880
gonna happen. That's good. It's good. What is

01:43:50.880 --> 01:43:53.560
this business you're doing? Well, it's my own

01:43:53.560 --> 01:43:58.279
Goggins LLC Basically, I I'm investing in myself

01:43:58.279 --> 01:44:01.479
I'm investing in myself and I hope that this

01:44:01.479 --> 01:44:06.880
story is can can change Somebody's life not to

01:44:06.880 --> 01:44:09.960
be me because they about me and I and I I try

01:44:09.960 --> 01:44:12.439
to be as real as I can Because we're all fucking

01:44:12.439 --> 01:44:14.500
suffering in this world. We're all hurting and

01:44:14.500 --> 01:44:17.319
I try to Take away all titles you want to give

01:44:17.319 --> 01:44:19.520
me that you know that I did not come from that

01:44:19.520 --> 01:44:21.399
shit That's why I have to be so authentic and

01:44:21.399 --> 01:44:24.140
so real about my own insecurities, my own faults,

01:44:24.279 --> 01:44:27.420
just being a fucked up person. I'm not the best

01:44:27.420 --> 01:44:31.140
at anything. I'm not gifted. I'm just driven.

01:44:31.880 --> 01:44:34.239
And it's all about trying to share that message

01:44:34.239 --> 01:44:37.760
with people. This is all about, I speak to a

01:44:37.760 --> 01:44:41.239
lot of people and that's what I do now. And how

01:44:41.239 --> 01:44:44.159
are you doing it as a business? I do some motivational

01:44:44.159 --> 01:44:46.899
speaking, but right now I'm not really trying

01:44:46.899 --> 01:44:48.840
to make a lot of fucking money. I'm just trying

01:44:48.840 --> 01:44:51.380
to build the brand as authentic as possible because

01:44:51.380 --> 01:44:54.159
I don't want to build it too fast because my

01:44:54.159 --> 01:44:56.659
biggest fear in life is people can read right

01:44:56.659 --> 01:44:59.260
through a motherfucker that's not real. I do

01:44:59.260 --> 01:45:01.340
it all the time. Like a lot of people have these

01:45:01.340 --> 01:45:05.760
great quotes and they mass produce. I can't mass

01:45:05.760 --> 01:45:08.119
produce something, man. Right. And they have

01:45:08.119 --> 01:45:09.920
these great quotes and shit, but are you living

01:45:09.920 --> 01:45:13.069
that motherfucker? What you just quoted? and

01:45:13.069 --> 01:45:16.029
how powerful it may sound, are you getting up

01:45:16.029 --> 01:45:17.930
every fucking morning? I'm not working out, whatever.

01:45:18.050 --> 01:45:20.569
Are you really getting the fuck after? Are you

01:45:20.569 --> 01:45:23.310
just talking to motivate people? Right. And I

01:45:23.310 --> 01:45:24.970
don't want to be that guy. Are you talking to

01:45:24.970 --> 01:45:26.510
pretend that you're really getting after it?

01:45:26.689 --> 01:45:27.989
Exactly. And a lot of people make this big money

01:45:27.989 --> 01:45:29.270
over here to the side, which is why I've been

01:45:29.270 --> 01:45:34.109
made a lot. And they talk this shit. And they're

01:45:34.109 --> 01:45:36.489
off this and it's gone. They're not authentic

01:45:36.489 --> 01:45:39.930
at all, man. It's all this shit. And I read it

01:45:39.930 --> 01:45:41.449
all the time. I'm like, man, this guy ain't bullshit.

01:45:42.109 --> 01:45:44.550
Bullshit, man. Fucking wake up, get after it,

01:45:44.550 --> 01:45:46.890
live what you're saying, and then it comes, people

01:45:46.890 --> 01:45:50.729
can see. When I talk, the reason I talk so fucking

01:45:50.729 --> 01:45:53.529
dispassionate, because I'm reliving my fucking

01:45:53.529 --> 01:45:56.710
life. I'm reliving this morning when I got up.

01:45:56.789 --> 01:45:58.829
I didn't want to do that shit. I'm reliving everything

01:45:58.829 --> 01:46:01.510
I did, and I can't speak to you like all calm

01:46:01.510 --> 01:46:04.689
and shit. Shit sucks. It sucks man. So whenever

01:46:04.689 --> 01:46:06.529
I start talking about like after this podcast,

01:46:06.529 --> 01:46:08.970
you'll see man. God you're so calm right now

01:46:08.970 --> 01:46:12.050
What the fuck is wrong with you? I'm not going

01:46:12.050 --> 01:46:13.829
back through that shit, man I'm not I'm not going

01:46:13.829 --> 01:46:15.890
back through the the suffering and shit that

01:46:15.890 --> 01:46:18.390
it took to become who I am today So I'm slowly

01:46:18.390 --> 01:46:19.909
trying to build this brand to the point where

01:46:19.909 --> 01:46:23.050
I can slowly Hopefully make people from motivated

01:46:23.050 --> 01:46:26.390
to driven because motivation is crap. It's shit

01:46:26.390 --> 01:46:28.569
people right now Maybe listen to this shit. They'd

01:46:28.569 --> 01:46:31.189
be motivated to go run if it's cold somewhere

01:46:31.189 --> 01:46:32.920
where they're at A lot of my friends will shut

01:46:32.920 --> 01:46:34.859
that door, go back inside. That's motivation.

01:46:35.380 --> 01:46:39.159
It comes and go as how you feel. If you and your

01:46:39.159 --> 01:46:40.739
wife are good, if you and your kids are good,

01:46:40.760 --> 01:46:44.560
if you're good at work, you're motivated. I like

01:46:44.560 --> 01:46:47.500
a motherfucker whose life is imploded, ain't

01:46:47.500 --> 01:46:51.600
got shit in life, and says, I still got to fucking

01:46:51.600 --> 01:46:53.880
get after it today, man. That's what it's about.

01:46:53.939 --> 01:46:56.159
So that's when you move from motivation to driven

01:46:56.159 --> 01:46:58.760
to obsessed. And I want people to realize, once

01:46:58.760 --> 01:47:00.880
you get to this person over here, the driven

01:47:00.880 --> 01:47:04.300
obsessed part, You're unstoppable this commitment

01:47:04.300 --> 01:47:06.800
that you have to authenticity is one of the reasons

01:47:06.800 --> 01:47:09.420
why people are connected to what your message

01:47:09.420 --> 01:47:11.760
is That's one of the reasons why what you're

01:47:11.760 --> 01:47:13.760
saying. You don't want to grow it too fast. You

01:47:13.760 --> 01:47:15.479
don't want it to be bullshit You're terrified

01:47:15.479 --> 01:47:17.399
of that thing just like we were talking about

01:47:17.399 --> 01:47:19.640
with weak people terrified of seeing that weakness

01:47:19.640 --> 01:47:22.739
in yourself, right? You know, we all see that

01:47:22.739 --> 01:47:25.180
we've all seen motivational things that are bullshit

01:47:25.180 --> 01:47:27.819
We've all talked to people that are talking and

01:47:27.819 --> 01:47:30.630
you realize there's nothing really They're connected

01:47:30.630 --> 01:47:32.449
to they're not really connected to their words

01:47:32.449 --> 01:47:34.590
the words just a bunch of words they've pieced

01:47:34.590 --> 01:47:36.590
together because they sound like something that

01:47:36.590 --> 01:47:39.409
someone who's You know enlightened on the subject

01:47:39.409 --> 01:47:42.470
would say right? Yeah, it doesn't it doesn't

01:47:42.470 --> 01:47:45.970
doesn't connect at all so your struggle now is

01:47:45.970 --> 01:47:48.930
to try to figure out how to stay you and Get

01:47:48.930 --> 01:47:51.609
the message out, but still be fully connected

01:47:51.609 --> 01:47:54.170
to that message right? That's you know it's not

01:47:54.170 --> 01:47:56.949
so much a struggle because I'm not really about

01:48:00.810 --> 01:48:03.050
I'm not driven by the business. I'm not driven

01:48:03.050 --> 01:48:06.289
by trying to be... I make a very small salary

01:48:06.289 --> 01:48:08.210
from being retired from the military. That's

01:48:08.210 --> 01:48:12.090
all I need. So I'm not fast to... I'm a minimalist

01:48:12.090 --> 01:48:15.189
motherfucker. Give me a backpack, a fucking ground

01:48:15.189 --> 01:48:18.250
to sleep on and a pull -up bar and a fucking...

01:48:18.250 --> 01:48:20.810
some running shoes and a subway sandwich or some

01:48:20.810 --> 01:48:24.750
shit and I'm fucking straight. So it's... I believe

01:48:24.750 --> 01:48:28.350
in patience. I'm a patient dude. I can watch

01:48:28.350 --> 01:48:31.210
a piece of grass grow for 20 years. Because I

01:48:31.210 --> 01:48:35.430
know that this is how you get somewhere in life.

01:48:35.909 --> 01:48:39.729
By being that monk -like mentality and being

01:48:39.729 --> 01:48:42.770
able to watch something grow very calmly, patiently.

01:48:43.289 --> 01:48:44.829
And that's all I'm doing right now. It's not

01:48:44.829 --> 01:48:46.170
about money. It's not about people knowing me.

01:48:46.250 --> 01:48:48.189
I don't care if you like me. Whoever wants to

01:48:48.189 --> 01:48:50.329
hear this, it's out there. It's out there. So

01:48:50.329 --> 01:48:54.109
your goal is to grow this? Right. Slowly. Very

01:48:54.109 --> 01:48:58.090
slowly. And your goal is to grow this in order

01:48:58.090 --> 01:49:01.060
to impact people? Period. That's it. It's not

01:49:01.060 --> 01:49:05.239
about me. What do you get out of impacting people?

01:49:07.479 --> 01:49:09.659
It's a good question. I don't get anything out

01:49:09.659 --> 01:49:12.939
of it. I'm a tool. But you must get something.

01:49:13.100 --> 01:49:14.899
There must be personal satisfaction. There must

01:49:14.899 --> 01:49:18.600
be a connection to those people. It must be enriching

01:49:18.600 --> 01:49:20.340
to you. It's hard to connect with people because

01:49:20.340 --> 01:49:22.800
there's quite a few now that are coming in. Right.

01:49:23.619 --> 01:49:28.420
It's my duty. It's my duty to share. It's kind

01:49:28.420 --> 01:49:32.220
of like, it's somebody who discovered a new earth,

01:49:32.680 --> 01:49:36.100
you know, and discovered the people in the water

01:49:36.100 --> 01:49:39.880
source and the food source. I discovered a whole

01:49:39.880 --> 01:49:42.779
other part of your fucking brain that a lot of

01:49:42.779 --> 01:49:46.460
people don't even know about. It's my job by

01:49:46.460 --> 01:49:48.439
being a fucking honest journey, being a discovery

01:49:48.439 --> 01:49:50.920
person, and being the person that maybe I didn't

01:49:50.920 --> 01:49:53.359
discover this part. I discovered a very important

01:49:53.359 --> 01:49:56.039
part that I haven't met many people that have

01:49:56.039 --> 01:49:58.319
discovered this part. I'm sure there's a lot

01:49:58.319 --> 01:50:01.760
out there, but it's my job now take these weak

01:50:01.760 --> 01:50:04.779
people in the category that I was in and say

01:50:04.779 --> 01:50:08.020
uh -uh Stop reading the bullshit stop listening

01:50:08.020 --> 01:50:12.220
to the bullshit And if my story of success can

01:50:12.220 --> 01:50:15.380
impact somebody it is my job is my duty To share

01:50:15.380 --> 01:50:17.859
the story as much as I'm not really fond of it

01:50:17.859 --> 01:50:19.899
I I'm not I'm the kind of guy that wants to sit

01:50:19.899 --> 01:50:23.260
in the fucking room and just be me Just be me

01:50:23.260 --> 01:50:28.010
alone by myself It's who I am But I have to get

01:50:28.010 --> 01:50:30.550
uncomfortable and tell people all this shit.

01:50:30.750 --> 01:50:32.890
I think it feels good telling people I had a

01:50:32.890 --> 01:50:35.170
fourth grade reading level in high school. I

01:50:35.170 --> 01:50:37.770
stuttered. I lied to people to be their fucking

01:50:37.770 --> 01:50:40.869
friends. It doesn't feel good. It doesn't feel

01:50:40.869 --> 01:50:44.369
good at all. But maybe somebody's doing the same

01:50:44.369 --> 01:50:47.630
shit. And maybe they can realize, wow, that motherfucker

01:50:47.630 --> 01:50:51.510
was a piece of shit. And he fucking now is a...

01:50:51.500 --> 01:50:55.060
Navy SEAL retired guy and runs these miles and

01:50:55.060 --> 01:51:00.039
was 297 pounds and pathetic fucker and wow And

01:51:00.039 --> 01:51:01.720
people say why are you talking so it's the fucking

01:51:01.720 --> 01:51:05.279
truth. I was a fucking pathetic motherfucker,

01:51:05.340 --> 01:51:07.760
man People cannot say that to themselves this

01:51:07.760 --> 01:51:10.279
we have to choose these great fucking magical

01:51:10.279 --> 01:51:13.760
words that that makes that make people feel good

01:51:13.760 --> 01:51:17.000
Tell yourself the truth If someone calls you

01:51:17.000 --> 01:51:20.140
fucking fat They may be bullying you, but you

01:51:20.140 --> 01:51:23.619
might be fucking fat Someone calls you dumb.

01:51:23.859 --> 01:51:28.220
It's mean, but you might be fucking dumb It's

01:51:28.220 --> 01:51:30.920
life man take it for what it's worth and change

01:51:30.920 --> 01:51:33.439
it and that terrible feeling when someone does

01:51:33.439 --> 01:51:36.260
tell you they're fat You can use that as fuel

01:51:36.260 --> 01:51:40.119
as fuel period and that's all this is about and

01:51:40.119 --> 01:51:44.060
where it goes if it goes somewhere and Whatever,

01:51:44.319 --> 01:51:47.239
you know Don't give a shit. Well, you said something

01:51:47.239 --> 01:51:50.279
that I think of when I run and it's that most

01:51:50.279 --> 01:51:53.079
people quit at 40 % I said that's my 40 % rule

01:51:53.079 --> 01:51:57.180
man. I love that my 40 % rule man and I am I

01:51:57.180 --> 01:51:59.300
Really developed that through my heart surgeries

01:51:59.300 --> 01:52:00.880
and I developed that through that first hundred

01:52:00.880 --> 01:52:04.140
mile run is I thought I had given a hundred percent

01:52:04.140 --> 01:52:06.380
But I was on that chair at mile 70. I was fucked

01:52:06.380 --> 01:52:09.119
up. I thought I'd given a hundred percent and

01:52:09.119 --> 01:52:13.079
to go that last I go man There has this I wasn't

01:52:13.079 --> 01:52:16.949
even nearer 100 % so I came up with this thing

01:52:16.949 --> 01:52:20.350
called the 40 % rule. It's basically where you

01:52:20.350 --> 01:52:24.289
it's like a car you put a governor on a car and

01:52:24.289 --> 01:52:26.430
They say the car can go 130 that governor stops

01:52:26.430 --> 01:52:29.109
the car at 91 and you're driving thinking man

01:52:29.109 --> 01:52:31.189
I want to fucking floor it but I can't go I can't

01:52:31.189 --> 01:52:33.649
go any faster We do that to our brain. We put

01:52:33.649 --> 01:52:35.649
a governor in our brain second. We feel pain

01:52:35.649 --> 01:52:38.590
discomfort Suffering all those words that we

01:52:38.590 --> 01:52:40.489
hate to say because we in this happy peaceful

01:52:40.489 --> 01:52:45.569
world. We live in now We stop We slow down and

01:52:45.569 --> 01:52:47.550
if you can get through these different barriers

01:52:47.550 --> 01:52:50.170
and gain five percent two percent three percent

01:52:50.170 --> 01:52:53.189
that forty percent becomes sixty that sixty percent

01:52:53.189 --> 01:52:55.829
becomes seventy and eighty and ninety and Then

01:52:55.829 --> 01:52:58.510
you'll hopefully one day near a hundred. I don't

01:52:58.510 --> 01:52:59.970
I don't know many people who probably add a hundred

01:52:59.970 --> 01:53:01.550
I mean we think we're there, but there's so much

01:53:01.550 --> 01:53:03.529
more isn't a hundred at death's door though.

01:53:03.529 --> 01:53:06.689
I was I loved that I think it's true I think

01:53:06.689 --> 01:53:09.149
that's 100 % true. I think when you were laying

01:53:09.149 --> 01:53:11.689
in that tub you'd knocked on the door. That is

01:53:11.689 --> 01:53:15.010
100 % true. No one has ever... That is 100 %

01:53:15.010 --> 01:53:18.369
true. I didn't give 100 % in that 101 mile run

01:53:18.369 --> 01:53:21.090
I did for the first time. So that's the scary

01:53:21.090 --> 01:53:23.170
thing. That's the scariest thing in the world.

01:53:23.270 --> 01:53:28.130
I didn't die. You probably gave 99 .9999 and

01:53:28.130 --> 01:53:30.090
got out of there with your life. I guarantee

01:53:30.090 --> 01:53:35.420
it. Man dude, I don't know how to end this any

01:53:35.420 --> 01:53:37.920
better than that. So let's just wrap this up

01:53:37.920 --> 01:53:41.560
If people want to find your stuff, what's the

01:53:41.560 --> 01:53:44.340
best place to go and look for it? I'm just at

01:53:44.340 --> 01:53:47.680
David Goggins man social media on Instagram Facebook

01:53:47.680 --> 01:53:50.659
I don't tweet that much stuff out because I'm

01:53:50.659 --> 01:53:54.500
I write these I write messages and I always link

01:53:54.500 --> 01:53:57.039
that, you know on Twitter to my Facebook and

01:53:57.039 --> 01:54:00.119
Instagram But it's just at David Goggins is an

01:54:00.119 --> 01:54:01.859
honor and a privilege, brother. Thanks very much,

01:54:02.000 --> 01:54:03.920
man. I really, really appreciate it. Thank you.

01:54:04.119 --> 01:54:06.800
David Goggins, ladies and gentlemen. Go after

01:54:06.800 --> 01:54:11.180
it, you motherfuckers! Come on! Dude, if that

01:54:11.180 --> 01:54:12.680
doesn't fire people up...