WEBVTT 00:00:02.460 --> 00:00:06.780 Alright, so we're beginning here what will be 00:00:06.780 --> 00:00:12.240 a series on the family. And so, in the weeks 00:00:12.240 --> 00:00:16.339 to come, we'll deal with a handful of topics. 00:00:17.879 --> 00:00:20.039 The family, we're going to deal with what is 00:00:20.039 --> 00:00:22.679 biblical manhood, what is biblical womanhood, 00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:26.100 what is biblical discipline, what is biblical 00:00:26.100 --> 00:00:32.950 child rearing, things like that. So I hope that 00:00:32.950 --> 00:00:35.409 you'll be here. I hope that you will benefit 00:00:35.409 --> 00:00:42.409 from it. I wasn't planning on beginning at this 00:00:42.409 --> 00:00:46.770 point. You may find that strange. But I want 00:00:46.770 --> 00:00:49.090 to ask the question this morning, what is the 00:00:49.090 --> 00:00:51.789 family? If we're going to talk about family, 00:00:51.950 --> 00:00:56.149 we better know what we're talking about. I asked 00:00:56.149 --> 00:00:58.969 some of my kids yesterday, what's the family? 00:00:59.599 --> 00:01:03.159 And they gave me some good answers and so I think 00:01:03.159 --> 00:01:07.439 I think we're in agreement here. I hope But we 00:01:07.439 --> 00:01:09.540 better be and so we're just going to start with 00:01:09.540 --> 00:01:12.859 some basic things here. And so what is a family? 00:01:13.840 --> 00:01:16.560 When the Bible speaks of a family, what does 00:01:16.560 --> 00:01:20.900 it mean? Okay, where do we get the family? Is 00:01:20.900 --> 00:01:25.500 this just some? Something that we've just kind 00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:28.400 of established over time or is Is this something 00:01:28.400 --> 00:01:30.560 biblical? Is this something scriptural? Do we 00:01:30.560 --> 00:01:34.700 go to the Bible for it? Well, we obviously think 00:01:34.700 --> 00:01:38.280 it is biblical, it is scriptural, that we have 00:01:38.280 --> 00:01:42.219 warrant for what a family is in the Bible. And 00:01:42.219 --> 00:01:44.540 so the first verse that we're gonna look at here 00:01:44.540 --> 00:01:48.959 is out of Genesis. I'm gonna go to the very beginning, 00:01:49.120 --> 00:01:53.519 the book of beginnings, Genesis chapter two. 00:01:54.540 --> 00:01:58.680 And we'll begin reading here in verse 18. Then 00:01:58.680 --> 00:02:01.180 the Lord God said it is not good for the man 00:02:01.180 --> 00:02:04.700 to be alone. I will make him a helper suitable 00:02:04.700 --> 00:02:07.620 for him out of the ground the Lord God formed 00:02:07.620 --> 00:02:09.979 every beast of the field and every bird of the 00:02:09.979 --> 00:02:12.219 sky and brought them to the man to see what he 00:02:12.219 --> 00:02:15.580 would call them and Whatever the man called a 00:02:15.580 --> 00:02:19.229 living creature. That was its name The man gave 00:02:19.229 --> 00:02:21.289 names to all the cattle, to the birds of the 00:02:21.289 --> 00:02:23.750 sky, to every beast of the field, but to Adam 00:02:23.750 --> 00:02:26.189 there was not found a helper suitable for him. 00:02:26.210 --> 00:02:29.330 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon 00:02:29.330 --> 00:02:33.270 the man and he slept. Then he took one of his 00:02:33.270 --> 00:02:35.550 ribs and closed up the flesh at the place. The 00:02:35.550 --> 00:02:39.110 Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which 00:02:39.110 --> 00:02:41.250 he had taken from the man and brought her to 00:02:41.250 --> 00:02:43.930 the man. The man said, this is now bone of my 00:02:43.930 --> 00:02:46.590 bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called 00:02:46.590 --> 00:02:51.020 woman. Because she was taken out of man For this 00:02:51.020 --> 00:02:53.520 reason a man shall leave his father and his mother 00:02:53.520 --> 00:02:56.379 and be joined to his wife And they shall become 00:02:56.379 --> 00:02:58.979 one flesh and the man and his wife were both 00:02:58.979 --> 00:03:02.180 naked and were not ashamed Here's the beginning 00:03:02.180 --> 00:03:05.620 of the family the man and a woman Adam and Eve 00:03:05.620 --> 00:03:14.419 here Jesus speaks of the same things Paul brings 00:03:14.419 --> 00:03:18.219 up Genesis, right? Ephesians when he's giving 00:03:18.219 --> 00:03:22.819 instructions regarding the family he says he 00:03:22.819 --> 00:03:25.599 quotes Genesis there in Ephesians 5 we'll maybe 00:03:25.599 --> 00:03:28.719 deal with that in a little bit but this is where 00:03:28.719 --> 00:03:34.139 it begins begins in Genesis it begins by whose 00:03:34.139 --> 00:03:38.939 design was it Adams design that he wanted a wife 00:03:38.939 --> 00:03:42.759 and so he decided I'm gonna start a family no 00:03:42.759 --> 00:03:46.530 it wasn't Adams design right It was God's design. 00:03:46.610 --> 00:03:48.909 He said it's not good for the man to be alone. 00:03:49.889 --> 00:03:52.830 And so he brought all these animals to him. Have 00:03:52.830 --> 00:03:54.569 you ever thought of that? This is a side note. 00:03:55.189 --> 00:03:57.810 Adam named all the animals. I mean that's phenomenal. 00:03:58.069 --> 00:04:01.509 That is amazing to think that Adam named all 00:04:01.509 --> 00:04:06.870 the animals. It's amazing. I mean just to think 00:04:06.870 --> 00:04:10.530 how many names he had to come up with. The intelligence 00:04:10.530 --> 00:04:13.990 that he must have had is amazing to think about. 00:04:14.759 --> 00:04:17.259 Anyway, that's a side note. But there was nothing 00:04:17.259 --> 00:04:19.079 there for him, right? There was nothing there. 00:04:19.180 --> 00:04:21.800 And so God makes a woman. He brings the woman 00:04:21.800 --> 00:04:25.220 to the man and says, here you go. And the first 00:04:25.220 --> 00:04:28.439 family is formed there with Adam and Eve. And 00:04:28.439 --> 00:04:31.060 so these are basic principles. And I think we're 00:04:31.060 --> 00:04:33.540 all in agreement here, right? I don't think I've 00:04:33.540 --> 00:04:35.319 got anybody sitting here telling me that I'm 00:04:35.319 --> 00:04:37.620 crazy thinking these things. And I don't think 00:04:37.620 --> 00:04:40.779 anybody here thinks anything different. But this 00:04:40.779 --> 00:04:44.480 is where it begins. Right here in Genesis, and 00:04:44.480 --> 00:04:48.220 so this is the foundation of our family, of our 00:04:48.220 --> 00:04:50.579 view of the family. It begins here in the Word 00:04:50.579 --> 00:04:55.220 of God by God's design, and it is good for us. 00:05:03.019 --> 00:05:05.180 Let's read a couple of the passages here. So 00:05:05.180 --> 00:05:09.240 if we go to the New Testament, in Ephesians there, 00:05:09.319 --> 00:05:12.990 we'll read... couple of verses here out of Ephesians. 00:05:13.689 --> 00:05:15.649 Maybe we'll just read this whole thing because 00:05:15.649 --> 00:05:18.610 we're going to make mention or reference it later 00:05:18.610 --> 00:05:25.250 on. Paul, he's giving instructions here. He says 00:05:25.250 --> 00:05:28.290 in verse 22 of chapter 5, wives be subject to 00:05:28.290 --> 00:05:31.290 your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband 00:05:31.290 --> 00:05:33.430 is the head of the wife as Christ also is the 00:05:33.430 --> 00:05:36.250 head of the church. He himself being the Savior 00:05:36.250 --> 00:05:39.000 of the body. But as the church is subject to 00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:42.360 Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their 00:05:42.360 --> 00:05:45.019 husbands and everything. Husbands, love your 00:05:45.019 --> 00:05:47.379 wives, just as Christ also loved the church, 00:05:47.920 --> 00:05:50.639 and gave himself up for her, so that he might 00:05:50.639 --> 00:05:53.019 sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing 00:05:53.019 --> 00:05:55.819 of water with the word, that he might present 00:05:55.819 --> 00:05:59.379 to himself the church in all her glory, having 00:05:59.379 --> 00:06:01.779 no spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that 00:06:01.779 --> 00:06:05.949 she would be holy and blameless. So husbands 00:06:05.949 --> 00:06:08.410 ought also to love their own wives as their own 00:06:08.410 --> 00:06:11.769 bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. 00:06:12.370 --> 00:06:15.170 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes 00:06:15.170 --> 00:06:18.389 and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the 00:06:18.389 --> 00:06:22.089 church. Because we are members of his body. For 00:06:22.089 --> 00:06:24.269 this reason, a man shall leave his father and 00:06:24.269 --> 00:06:26.129 mother, and shall be joined to his wife, and 00:06:26.129 --> 00:06:29.089 the two shall become one flesh. This mystery 00:06:29.089 --> 00:06:32.290 is great, but I am speaking with reference to 00:06:32.290 --> 00:06:35.759 Christ in the church. Nevertheless, each individual 00:06:35.759 --> 00:06:38.639 among you also is to love his own wife even as 00:06:38.639 --> 00:06:41.939 himself, and the wife must see to it that she 00:06:41.939 --> 00:06:46.319 respects her husband." So again, Paul there, 00:06:46.720 --> 00:06:49.899 he uses these words from Genesis in the very 00:06:49.899 --> 00:06:53.360 beginning in the establishment of the family 00:06:53.360 --> 00:06:57.459 as he gives instructions for husbands and wives. 00:07:10.149 --> 00:07:12.050 We've dealt with some of these things before 00:07:12.050 --> 00:07:14.290 so when I preach through Peter I don't want to 00:07:14.290 --> 00:07:17.470 rehash everything so I think we all understand 00:07:17.470 --> 00:07:21.129 it, but I'm just gonna say it There is an order 00:07:21.129 --> 00:07:24.089 in the family we read that here the husband is 00:07:24.089 --> 00:07:26.589 the head of the wife Just as Christ is the head 00:07:26.589 --> 00:07:29.810 of the church wives are to submit themselves 00:07:29.810 --> 00:07:33.029 to their husbands as the church submits to Christ 00:07:33.029 --> 00:07:37.649 That's pretty clear It should be it's clear to 00:07:37.649 --> 00:07:43.439 us. I hope There is this order in the family 00:07:43.439 --> 00:07:48.040 and it is God ordained And I want to stress this 00:07:48.040 --> 00:07:52.339 to us Because it is vital. It is critical. It 00:07:52.339 --> 00:07:59.399 is not optional. All right To have a family is 00:07:59.399 --> 00:08:03.060 not necessarily to have a biblical family Right, 00:08:03.379 --> 00:08:05.699 can we all agree with that? Just because we have 00:08:05.699 --> 00:08:07.699 a family doesn't mean it's a biblical family 00:08:07.699 --> 00:08:10.750 even if we're in church every Sunday It means 00:08:10.750 --> 00:08:16.370 nothing. If the husband is not leading the wife, 00:08:17.129 --> 00:08:20.610 if he is not the head of the home, if he doesn't 00:08:20.610 --> 00:08:25.389 wear the pants, it's not a biblical home. It's 00:08:25.389 --> 00:08:29.990 not a biblical family. Let's be very clear about 00:08:29.990 --> 00:08:33.870 that. You can come to church every Sunday. You 00:08:33.870 --> 00:08:37.990 can even have your devotions every day and not 00:08:37.990 --> 00:08:41.049 be leading your wife. as the Bible tells you 00:08:41.049 --> 00:08:46.549 to be, and you have an unbiblical family. That's 00:08:46.549 --> 00:08:49.429 just the reality of it. So there is an order. 00:08:51.330 --> 00:08:55.330 Again, you can be the most spiritual wife in 00:08:55.330 --> 00:09:00.009 so many ways, spending time in the Word, at church 00:09:00.009 --> 00:09:02.710 every Sunday, Wednesday, when the doors are open, 00:09:02.970 --> 00:09:05.090 and not be submissive to your husband, and you 00:09:05.090 --> 00:09:07.870 don't have a biblical family. You're failing. 00:09:09.120 --> 00:09:12.360 That's the crux of the matter, right? That's 00:09:12.360 --> 00:09:15.200 the realities that we're dealing with. Is that 00:09:15.200 --> 00:09:19.139 okay? No, it's not. It's not okay. And so that's 00:09:19.139 --> 00:09:22.179 why we're teaching on these things. To make sure 00:09:22.179 --> 00:09:25.039 that we're all clear on these. And that we can 00:09:25.039 --> 00:09:27.419 all change and conform our lives to Scripture. 00:09:27.600 --> 00:09:33.759 That's the goal. A very simple, clear example 00:09:33.759 --> 00:09:35.940 Paul gives us here with Christ and the Church. 00:09:38.420 --> 00:09:41.019 Christ is the head of the church as the husband 00:09:41.019 --> 00:09:44.200 is the head of the wife Does the church say to 00:09:44.200 --> 00:09:48.759 Christ? Hey, I don't really appreciate what you 00:09:48.759 --> 00:09:51.080 did here. I don't like this teaching that you 00:09:51.080 --> 00:09:54.480 gave us here and so We're not going to do that 00:09:54.480 --> 00:10:00.159 That's laughable right we all would say that's 00:10:00.159 --> 00:10:05.799 ludicrous that's insanity and yet That happens 00:10:05.799 --> 00:10:10.600 all the time In the church. Church in quotation 00:10:10.600 --> 00:10:13.879 marks there. But then also in the husband -wife 00:10:13.879 --> 00:10:18.059 relationship. The wives do the same thing. Well, 00:10:18.059 --> 00:10:20.600 I'm not going to follow that. I'm not going to 00:10:20.600 --> 00:10:24.679 do that one. That sounds nice. Go ahead. But 00:10:24.679 --> 00:10:29.759 that's not for me. That's not a biblical family. 00:10:30.419 --> 00:10:38.580 You're in sin. Husbands. Lead. Right? How did 00:10:38.580 --> 00:10:41.000 Christ lead the church? He gave clear instruction. 00:10:41.360 --> 00:10:47.139 He gave guidance. He gave leadership. He loved 00:10:47.139 --> 00:10:51.659 the church. He laid down his life for the church. 00:10:53.139 --> 00:10:56.679 We look at Christ. All that he did, all that 00:10:56.679 --> 00:10:59.200 he accomplished, all that he went through for 00:10:59.200 --> 00:11:02.720 us. And we say what wondrous love is this? Oh 00:11:02.720 --> 00:11:07.450 my soul. Is that how you're leading your wife? 00:11:08.929 --> 00:11:11.789 Is that what your wife's saying to you? What 00:11:11.789 --> 00:11:15.330 a wonderful love he shows me as he leads me in 00:11:15.330 --> 00:11:21.809 these things. Let me follow him. We know these 00:11:21.809 --> 00:11:24.929 things. Are we putting them into practice? Are 00:11:24.929 --> 00:11:29.990 we loving? Are we leading? Are we submitting 00:11:29.990 --> 00:11:35.759 as we should as husbands and wives? Like I said, 00:11:35.919 --> 00:11:38.759 we've talked about these things before, so I 00:11:38.759 --> 00:11:42.580 think we're all in agreement. But are we doing 00:11:42.580 --> 00:11:46.120 them? It's one thing to say, yes, I agree. It's 00:11:46.120 --> 00:11:53.919 another thing to do it. You young couples, it 00:11:53.919 --> 00:11:59.340 is vital that as you begin your relationship, 00:12:00.200 --> 00:12:05.149 these things are established now. It only gets 00:12:05.149 --> 00:12:10.389 harder. It only gets harder. Have you ever been 00:12:10.389 --> 00:12:14.309 at work? So this is my experience at work. When 00:12:14.309 --> 00:12:18.269 I don't lead well, it goes poorly. So we get 00:12:18.269 --> 00:12:22.230 some guys, maybe some new guys, and you know, 00:12:22.230 --> 00:12:24.289 you want to be nice, you want to get along, you 00:12:24.289 --> 00:12:26.009 know, you want to show them, hey, I'm not a big 00:12:26.009 --> 00:12:29.809 over, even though I am. And so, you know, so 00:12:29.809 --> 00:12:31.009 we're going to, you know, we're going to make 00:12:31.009 --> 00:12:34.220 it, you know, just get along here. You know, 00:12:34.220 --> 00:12:35.740 they're doing some things that you're thinking, 00:12:35.980 --> 00:12:37.700 oh, well, you know, they're new. It's their first 00:12:37.700 --> 00:12:42.840 week. Let's... What happens? It doesn't change. 00:12:43.519 --> 00:12:45.259 And then you just got to put the hammer down 00:12:45.259 --> 00:12:48.100 eventually. Maybe you even say, hey, you know, 00:12:48.100 --> 00:12:50.419 you know, nice. Maybe we don't want to do it 00:12:50.419 --> 00:12:52.620 like that. But you don't really tell them, hey, 00:12:52.659 --> 00:12:54.679 that's not an option. We're doing it like this. 00:12:56.220 --> 00:12:59.519 It's the same with your wife and your husbands. 00:12:59.620 --> 00:13:02.549 It's the same thing. Just getting along. Oh, 00:13:02.549 --> 00:13:04.529 everything's all great. Let's just get along 00:13:04.529 --> 00:13:07.669 here and move on through Ten years later. Nothing's 00:13:07.669 --> 00:13:10.110 changed and you've walked down this road and 00:13:10.110 --> 00:13:12.970 there's no turning back it feels like Because 00:13:12.970 --> 00:13:16.590 these habits are set the patterns have been the 00:13:16.590 --> 00:13:20.509 way they are So you young people establish a 00:13:20.509 --> 00:13:26.590 biblical pattern now? Husbands lead your wives 00:13:26.590 --> 00:13:33.389 wives submit to your husbands It's important. 00:13:33.990 --> 00:13:39.669 It's important I'm gonna say this later on I'm 00:13:39.669 --> 00:13:41.710 gonna say it now and maybe I won't say it later. 00:13:41.710 --> 00:13:44.870 Does it does it really matter? Okay, we're gonna 00:13:44.870 --> 00:13:47.529 talk about biblical manhood. We're gonna talk 00:13:47.529 --> 00:13:49.970 about raising children disciplining children 00:13:49.970 --> 00:13:53.529 Does it really matter if at the end of the day? 00:13:54.110 --> 00:13:57.129 We stay married for 50 years. I mean, is this 00:13:57.129 --> 00:13:59.950 really that important that we live like this? 00:13:59.929 --> 00:14:02.370 Is it important that we discipline our children 00:14:02.370 --> 00:14:04.309 a certain way as long as they turn out to be 00:14:04.309 --> 00:14:07.429 good citizens? As long as they're productive 00:14:07.429 --> 00:14:10.350 in society and they're responsible? Does it really 00:14:10.350 --> 00:14:13.409 matter? You know, so -and -so raised five kids 00:14:13.409 --> 00:14:15.490 and they didn't do any of these things you're 00:14:15.490 --> 00:14:18.149 talking about. I know somebody who's been married 00:14:18.149 --> 00:14:21.690 60 years and they don't do these things. Does 00:14:21.690 --> 00:14:28.730 it matter? Yeah, it matters. Why does it matter? 00:14:31.050 --> 00:14:33.970 Because we've been given instructions. We've 00:14:33.970 --> 00:14:37.690 been commanded to do things a certain way. It 00:14:37.690 --> 00:14:40.429 doesn't matter what you like. It doesn't matter 00:14:40.429 --> 00:14:43.409 how you feel. It doesn't matter what worked for 00:14:43.409 --> 00:14:47.490 somebody else, quote unquote. What matters is 00:14:47.490 --> 00:14:51.990 are you being obedient to God? That's the Christian 00:14:51.990 --> 00:14:55.389 life, right? Are we to just make up our own rules 00:14:55.389 --> 00:14:59.529 as we go? No, God has given us instructions. 00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:03.679 He has told us to do things a certain way. If 00:15:03.679 --> 00:15:07.159 we neglect that, we're in sin, plain and simple. 00:15:09.179 --> 00:15:13.679 Okay? So, my goal, as we go through all of these 00:15:13.679 --> 00:15:16.659 things, is to give you what the Bible says. Now, 00:15:16.659 --> 00:15:18.759 obviously, there are some things where I'm gonna 00:15:18.759 --> 00:15:24.340 give my counsel, my experience in life, but it's 00:15:24.340 --> 00:15:30.649 hopefully based upon biblical principles. If 00:15:30.649 --> 00:15:33.169 you neglect those biblical principles, you are 00:15:33.169 --> 00:15:37.809 in sin. Plain and simple. If you do not discipline 00:15:37.809 --> 00:15:40.830 your children according to scripture, you are 00:15:40.830 --> 00:15:45.830 in sin. If you do it your way and not God's way, 00:15:46.330 --> 00:15:51.909 you are in sin. Is God glorified in that? No. 00:15:52.889 --> 00:15:55.009 What are our lives supposed to be? What's our 00:15:55.009 --> 00:15:59.429 main goal? What's our objective? To glorify God. 00:15:59.740 --> 00:16:03.299 Why are we put on this earth? To glorify God. 00:16:04.879 --> 00:16:10.139 We're failing at level one if we refuse to do 00:16:10.139 --> 00:16:14.940 what God has called us to do. So the family, 00:16:15.220 --> 00:16:18.360 we start here with the husbands and wives. It 00:16:18.360 --> 00:16:21.919 is essential that these things be done in order. 00:16:22.720 --> 00:16:25.700 That the husbands lead. That the wives submit. 00:16:26.919 --> 00:16:29.659 The husband loves his wife and lays down his 00:16:29.659 --> 00:16:33.740 life for her. These are essential. These are 00:16:33.740 --> 00:16:53.240 essential to the family. Briefly then. That is 00:16:53.240 --> 00:16:57.269 essential that the husband leads. But does every 00:16:57.269 --> 00:17:04.690 family look the same? What does it look like 00:17:04.690 --> 00:17:08.569 to lead? We'll deal with this more later on, 00:17:08.670 --> 00:17:15.029 but consider that. A simple example. One thing 00:17:15.029 --> 00:17:18.150 that I tell every married couple that I counsel. 00:17:19.910 --> 00:17:21.869 Your family may look a little different than 00:17:21.869 --> 00:17:24.349 mine. The way things run in your home may look 00:17:24.349 --> 00:17:29.089 differently than mine. And that's okay. Because 00:17:29.089 --> 00:17:32.569 the way I lead and the way you lead may be slightly 00:17:32.569 --> 00:17:35.670 different. And the things that you require, I 00:17:35.670 --> 00:17:41.009 may not require. But whatever those things are, 00:17:41.529 --> 00:17:44.150 the husband is to lead in them. So for example, 00:17:44.529 --> 00:17:47.490 does it matter who cooks dinner? Does it matter 00:17:47.490 --> 00:17:50.490 who cleans the house? Does it matter who pays 00:17:50.490 --> 00:17:56.710 the bills? Does the Bible tell us who's to do 00:17:56.710 --> 00:18:01.150 each one of those things? Not necessarily. But 00:18:01.150 --> 00:18:02.970 does the Bible tell us that those things are 00:18:02.970 --> 00:18:08.349 supposed to be done? Yes. And so it's the husband's 00:18:08.349 --> 00:18:13.569 job to what? See to it that they get done. If 00:18:13.569 --> 00:18:17.509 that means delegation, if that means doing it 00:18:17.509 --> 00:18:22.730 himself, it doesn't matter. He is to lead in 00:18:22.730 --> 00:18:29.470 that. Leading is commanding. Leading is giving 00:18:29.470 --> 00:18:34.650 instruction. Leading is saying this will be done 00:18:34.650 --> 00:18:39.250 today. The house will be cleaned every whatever. 00:18:41.049 --> 00:18:43.509 Dinner is going to be on the table for the family 00:18:43.509 --> 00:18:47.009 so that we can all eat together. The bills are 00:18:47.009 --> 00:18:51.029 going to be paid on such and such a date by me, 00:18:51.069 --> 00:18:55.640 by you, by whoever. So that may look differently, 00:18:56.200 --> 00:18:58.980 but it's all to be done. Those are three simple 00:18:58.980 --> 00:19:03.220 things, but that branches out into all manner 00:19:03.220 --> 00:19:08.420 of areas in your personal life, your family traditions, 00:19:08.579 --> 00:19:11.920 things like that that you do. It's gonna look 00:19:11.920 --> 00:19:15.200 different from home to home, but husbands are 00:19:15.200 --> 00:19:26.079 to lead in all of those things. Okay. Why is 00:19:26.079 --> 00:19:29.980 this so important? Why is the family so important? 00:19:30.500 --> 00:19:32.960 Or is the family very important? Maybe I should 00:19:32.960 --> 00:19:39.940 ask that question. Is the family important? Have 00:19:39.940 --> 00:19:42.259 you thought about that? I mean, I think we all 00:19:42.259 --> 00:19:44.140 think the family. We all love our families, and 00:19:44.140 --> 00:19:46.019 so we're all thinking, well, yeah, family's important. 00:19:46.180 --> 00:19:50.680 I love my family. But the family unit and the 00:19:50.680 --> 00:19:53.059 way that the family is structured and organized 00:19:53.059 --> 00:19:55.559 and run and so on so forth is that important? 00:19:57.259 --> 00:20:02.160 It's vitally important It's pivotal. It's key 00:20:02.160 --> 00:20:06.559 We cannot stress enough the importance of it 00:20:06.559 --> 00:20:11.619 The world sees the importance of the family I 00:20:11.619 --> 00:20:15.440 looked at one one website And they were talking 00:20:15.440 --> 00:20:18.160 about how important the family is. And here's 00:20:18.160 --> 00:20:19.940 the reasons why. And they were good reasons. 00:20:20.039 --> 00:20:27.819 They were really good reasons. The problem with 00:20:27.819 --> 00:20:32.140 the website was their view of what the family 00:20:32.140 --> 00:20:37.059 was wasn't biblical. What is the family? Two 00:20:37.059 --> 00:20:41.000 men? Two women? Two women and some children? 00:20:43.819 --> 00:20:46.839 Well, yeah, they think all these things are true 00:20:46.839 --> 00:20:49.500 regarding the family, but they don't have a biblical 00:20:49.500 --> 00:20:53.079 view of the family So the world thinks family 00:20:53.079 --> 00:20:57.039 is important Because it is impactful in the lives 00:20:57.039 --> 00:21:02.279 of children impactful on society and That is 00:21:02.279 --> 00:21:07.960 true Do you realize the importance? The huge 00:21:07.960 --> 00:21:11.579 role that you play as a husband and as a father 00:21:11.579 --> 00:21:15.880 in the lives of your children We are shaping 00:21:15.880 --> 00:21:21.119 our children, either in a good way or a bad way. 00:21:21.799 --> 00:21:24.640 There's a huge responsibility upon our shoulders 00:21:24.640 --> 00:21:30.240 as parents. Here's a list of things that this 00:21:30.240 --> 00:21:35.140 website talked about. Socialization, behavior, 00:21:36.819 --> 00:21:40.700 identity, your children's identity, the values 00:21:40.700 --> 00:21:45.769 that they grow up with. social skills, education, 00:21:46.349 --> 00:21:52.009 providing physical needs, emotional needs, emotional 00:21:52.009 --> 00:21:55.289 support, stress, anxiety, depression, all these 00:21:55.289 --> 00:21:58.670 different things. If the world sees how important 00:21:58.670 --> 00:22:04.109 the family is in the life of a child, as a church 00:22:04.109 --> 00:22:07.289 do we see the importance of the family in the 00:22:07.289 --> 00:22:13.200 lives of our children? We are to instruct them 00:22:13.200 --> 00:22:18.799 in godliness, in the gospel. The values that 00:22:18.799 --> 00:22:21.519 we share are not the values that the world shares. 00:22:22.440 --> 00:22:25.799 They say instruct them in these good values. 00:22:27.200 --> 00:22:32.220 What are they based on? Whatever. Doesn't matter, 00:22:32.339 --> 00:22:34.079 right? Just as long as the family's together. 00:22:34.839 --> 00:22:36.500 Just as long as you instruct them in whatever 00:22:36.500 --> 00:22:42.059 it is. But no. The family is vital for those 00:22:42.059 --> 00:22:48.839 reasons because we are training, disciplining, 00:22:49.119 --> 00:22:56.740 teaching, shaping our children. It is critically 00:22:56.740 --> 00:23:04.660 important, this family structure. It's important 00:23:04.660 --> 00:23:06.900 in society and it's important in the church. 00:23:08.140 --> 00:23:15.359 Do we view it in that way? Do you see how impactful 00:23:15.359 --> 00:23:39.720 the family is? Couple of quotes here. As the 00:23:39.720 --> 00:23:42.500 family goes, so goes the church and society. 00:23:46.259 --> 00:23:50.859 That's true. That is true. As the family goes, 00:23:51.200 --> 00:23:57.119 so goes the church and so goes society. A wise 00:23:57.119 --> 00:24:02.720 man has said that. Here's another one. This is 00:24:02.720 --> 00:24:08.000 from Joel Beeke. Godly husbands and fathers are 00:24:08.000 --> 00:24:11.920 at the center of biblically ordered families. 00:24:13.799 --> 00:24:16.319 Biblically ordered families are vital to the 00:24:16.319 --> 00:24:20.119 health of the church. The church is the beachhead 00:24:20.119 --> 00:24:23.500 of God's kingdom and both the salt and light 00:24:23.500 --> 00:24:31.579 of society. The family impacts the church and 00:24:31.579 --> 00:24:36.039 society. The breakdown of the family is a breakdown 00:24:36.039 --> 00:24:41.140 in society. It is a breakdown of the church. 00:24:42.940 --> 00:24:53.240 It is key that we maintain the true biblical 00:24:53.240 --> 00:25:00.980 family that we are given in the Word. We see 00:25:00.980 --> 00:25:04.359 the destruction of it in our society. Okay? So 00:25:04.359 --> 00:25:07.609 I want to make that clear. So this website that 00:25:07.609 --> 00:25:11.269 I got on to look at these things, they had some 00:25:11.269 --> 00:25:14.349 nice things to say. They were some good things. 00:25:15.529 --> 00:25:18.109 This list that I said, how parents impact and 00:25:18.109 --> 00:25:20.130 the family impacts the children, that's true. 00:25:22.849 --> 00:25:25.849 But they tear down the family because they don't 00:25:25.849 --> 00:25:28.950 hold the family for what it really is. They don't 00:25:28.950 --> 00:25:32.869 view the family in a biblical way. It doesn't 00:25:32.869 --> 00:25:36.460 matter what the family looks like to them. Whatever 00:25:36.460 --> 00:25:40.559 that family may be, they're happy with that. 00:25:42.160 --> 00:25:48.400 That's not okay. It's not okay that two men have 00:25:48.400 --> 00:25:52.859 children. Of course, it's physically impossible, 00:25:52.960 --> 00:25:55.059 but they shouldn't be adopting children. That's 00:25:55.059 --> 00:25:59.740 not a family. That's not a good thing. Is that 00:25:59.740 --> 00:26:03.579 child going to grow up with healthy values, with 00:26:03.579 --> 00:26:08.660 biblical values? with a proper view on all these 00:26:08.660 --> 00:26:13.119 different things? No, of course not. But the 00:26:13.119 --> 00:26:15.660 world loves that. They think that's such a wonderful, 00:26:15.660 --> 00:26:18.680 loving thing that these guys have adopted some 00:26:18.680 --> 00:26:21.079 children and now they've got this wonderful family. 00:26:22.900 --> 00:26:32.180 It's not. It's horrible. It's a total disregard 00:26:32.180 --> 00:26:38.849 of all truth. We should be willing to stand for 00:26:38.849 --> 00:26:44.089 the family. Saying what I'm saying here, the 00:26:44.089 --> 00:26:47.089 family is what it is according to Scripture. 00:26:48.069 --> 00:26:52.150 Husbands and wives, children, husbands and wives 00:26:52.150 --> 00:26:57.009 in this biblical relationship leading, submitting, 00:26:57.950 --> 00:27:02.630 children obeying. We have got to stand for those 00:27:02.630 --> 00:27:08.579 things. Satan's desire. is to destroy the family. 00:27:09.539 --> 00:27:12.640 And we see that. We see that in our society now. 00:27:13.619 --> 00:27:15.819 I remember years ago, what was the big thing? 00:27:15.980 --> 00:27:19.920 It takes a village to raise children. Right? 00:27:20.359 --> 00:27:22.980 Maybe they still spout that, I don't know. I 00:27:22.980 --> 00:27:26.599 remember Hillary Clinton was all big into that. 00:27:26.859 --> 00:27:29.000 Was that back in the early 90s or something like 00:27:29.000 --> 00:27:34.380 that. That's nonsense. That's foolishness. That's 00:27:34.380 --> 00:27:38.700 the devil. Takes a village to raise a child. 00:27:38.839 --> 00:27:42.339 No, it doesn't It takes two godly parents. That's 00:27:42.339 --> 00:27:45.579 what it takes Relying upon God led of the spirit. 00:27:46.039 --> 00:27:49.700 That's what it takes to raise children It doesn't 00:27:49.700 --> 00:27:54.759 take a village Black lives matter. I was that 00:27:54.759 --> 00:27:56.720 came to my mind for some reason this week. And 00:27:56.720 --> 00:28:00.259 so I was looking up some stuff and Did they were 00:28:00.259 --> 00:28:02.660 they really seeking to destroy the family and 00:28:02.660 --> 00:28:04.579 you know, you get all these different articles 00:28:04.859 --> 00:28:07.539 Some people say, well, no, they weren't. Some 00:28:07.539 --> 00:28:11.220 say they were. They went about it in a roundabout 00:28:11.220 --> 00:28:16.059 way. Saying, well, yeah, we don't want to destroy 00:28:16.059 --> 00:28:19.500 the family. We just don't think that the family 00:28:19.500 --> 00:28:22.700 as it used to be is really very tenable any longer. 00:28:23.859 --> 00:28:25.559 And so what is that? That's a destruction of 00:28:25.559 --> 00:28:29.279 the family. It's no good. It's no longer okay 00:28:29.279 --> 00:28:33.920 in this way. Family is more this, community. 00:28:34.619 --> 00:28:37.200 And, you know, too many single people. And so, 00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:38.740 you know, that's the family. And that's what 00:28:38.740 --> 00:28:42.059 we need to nurture and encourage now. That's 00:28:42.059 --> 00:28:46.420 not family. It's not a biblical family. Do we 00:28:46.420 --> 00:28:48.619 have single mothers and fathers raising children? 00:28:48.619 --> 00:28:52.039 We do. And we love and support and help them 00:28:52.039 --> 00:28:54.299 all that we can. But we don't say that's a good, 00:28:54.359 --> 00:28:58.299 biblical, fine role model to have their single 00:28:58.299 --> 00:29:01.319 parents with children. That's not a good thing. 00:29:02.349 --> 00:29:05.109 That's not okay if that's just how it happened 00:29:05.109 --> 00:29:10.430 to play out. It's not acceptable. In society, 00:29:10.609 --> 00:29:14.049 it's acceptable any longer, right? Anything goes. 00:29:15.690 --> 00:29:21.369 That's not family. And you see our society falling 00:29:21.369 --> 00:29:25.170 further and further and further because of it. 00:29:27.230 --> 00:29:31.880 We should stand for truth. and stand for a biblical 00:29:31.880 --> 00:29:36.579 family. It is essential. Satan would seek to 00:29:36.579 --> 00:29:39.940 tear it down, corrupt, diminish, and destroy 00:29:39.940 --> 00:29:43.019 of the biblical family. And he has done that 00:29:43.019 --> 00:29:48.680 in many ways in our society. And so, be on guard 00:29:48.680 --> 00:29:54.259 against that. It's not a family, all of these 00:29:54.259 --> 00:30:29.779 other things. It's not. Alright. So. Let me conclude 00:30:29.779 --> 00:30:39.000 like this then. As I've already said, I want 00:30:39.000 --> 00:30:40.920 to look at these things from a biblical point 00:30:40.920 --> 00:30:43.079 of view. I don't want to just give you my opinions. 00:30:43.519 --> 00:30:46.259 And that's why we started here. We started with 00:30:46.259 --> 00:30:52.259 the family. We started in Genesis there. We looked 00:30:52.259 --> 00:30:54.440 at this passage in Ephesians that Paul deals 00:30:54.440 --> 00:30:56.900 with, where he deals with husbands and wives, 00:30:56.980 --> 00:31:02.849 talks about the family. We are going to deal 00:31:02.849 --> 00:31:06.509 with these other topics that I've already mentioned 00:31:06.509 --> 00:31:11.250 And it's not an easy thing I just want everybody 00:31:11.250 --> 00:31:16.130 to know that for me to stand here It's not an 00:31:16.130 --> 00:31:22.509 easy thing What am I going to say to you regarding 00:31:22.509 --> 00:31:29.009 manhood what is it to be a biblical man Do you 00:31:29.009 --> 00:31:34.480 think I'm perfect in that No, I'm not. But I 00:31:34.480 --> 00:31:37.599 can look out here and I can see too. You guys 00:31:37.599 --> 00:31:41.319 aren't perfect in this. And so what am I gonna 00:31:41.319 --> 00:31:47.039 do? I'm gonna be calling you out, right? Again, 00:31:47.039 --> 00:31:49.000 I'm not gonna try to call you out personally, 00:31:49.019 --> 00:31:52.599 obviously. But it's not an easy thing to sit 00:31:52.599 --> 00:31:55.119 here and say these things when we start dealing 00:31:55.119 --> 00:31:59.640 with children. That's not an easy thing either. 00:32:01.059 --> 00:32:04.400 I want you all to know it's not easy for me to 00:32:04.400 --> 00:32:06.180 say the things that I say if you're offended 00:32:06.180 --> 00:32:11.519 by them. That's not my goal to offend you. My 00:32:11.519 --> 00:32:16.539 goal is to nurture and to grow you up in the 00:32:16.539 --> 00:32:21.039 truth. To help you along the way. That's my goal. 00:32:21.720 --> 00:32:26.759 Because I love you. So if I offend you, I'm sorry. 00:32:27.660 --> 00:32:30.809 I don't mean to be offensive. But if the truth 00:32:30.809 --> 00:32:36.529 is offensive, then good. I hope that it strikes 00:32:36.529 --> 00:32:39.990 a nerve, strikes a chord, and it changes you. 00:32:40.509 --> 00:32:44.230 I hope the truth is transforming. That's my desire. 00:32:44.490 --> 00:32:48.549 That's my goal. Not to be offensive because I'm 00:32:48.549 --> 00:32:52.349 saying the things in a way I shouldn't say them. 00:32:52.349 --> 00:32:55.809 That's not what I want. I want to say them in 00:32:55.809 --> 00:33:00.000 a way that helps, that encourages. you to change. 00:33:01.940 --> 00:33:04.660 All of these topics are important for every one 00:33:04.660 --> 00:33:13.420 of you. You young women. Izzy. Julia. I'm sorry, 00:33:13.680 --> 00:33:22.000 I don't know your name. Mia, that's right. Biblical 00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:24.640 manhood. Does that mean anything to you guys? 00:33:25.059 --> 00:33:29.170 Is that important to you? It is, it should be. 00:33:29.750 --> 00:33:32.029 Because you're gonna seek for a man one day to 00:33:32.029 --> 00:33:35.269 be married, hopefully. And when you do have a 00:33:35.269 --> 00:33:38.390 man, hopefully you'll have children, and you 00:33:38.390 --> 00:33:45.930 wanna raise them up to be men. Men of God. Charlie, 00:33:46.670 --> 00:33:53.950 Josh, Mike and Marty, Ben. What does a biblical 00:33:53.950 --> 00:33:57.519 woman look like? You guys are going to look for 00:33:57.519 --> 00:34:06.779 those one day. It's important, right? Womanhood, 00:34:07.200 --> 00:34:12.960 manhood, children, it applies to all of us. Grandparents, 00:34:13.699 --> 00:34:17.519 we, we've got something, right? We should be 00:34:17.519 --> 00:34:19.960 able to give wisdom and instruction in these 00:34:19.960 --> 00:34:24.079 things. So it's important for us to know what 00:34:24.079 --> 00:34:30.530 these things are. It applies to all of us. And 00:34:30.530 --> 00:34:35.550 so just because I'm not speaking to you to change 00:34:35.550 --> 00:34:38.429 your life doesn't mean you shouldn't be thinking 00:34:38.429 --> 00:34:41.190 about what these things mean in the lives of 00:34:41.190 --> 00:34:43.789 the ones you're looking to in the future and 00:34:43.789 --> 00:34:48.829 your children and so on. So they are of vital 00:34:48.829 --> 00:34:54.409 importance to us. I want us to take these things 00:34:54.409 --> 00:34:58.590 to heart. I want us to change. I want to change. 00:35:01.010 --> 00:35:04.429 I want to be a better man. I want to be a better 00:35:04.429 --> 00:35:09.289 father. A better husband. I have not arrived, 00:35:10.289 --> 00:35:16.510 as you all well know. Growth and maturity in 00:35:16.510 --> 00:35:19.570 these things is the goal. To the glory of God. 00:35:20.429 --> 00:35:27.519 To the honor of Christ. I want to say that just 00:35:27.519 --> 00:35:30.360 as we begin here. These things that I've already 00:35:30.360 --> 00:35:37.099 said, we know those things. They're clear. Hopefully, 00:35:37.760 --> 00:35:40.039 we're striving after those things or changing 00:35:40.039 --> 00:35:43.139 our lives to be better husbands and wives in 00:35:43.139 --> 00:35:49.539 that regard. I didn't want to say this because 00:35:49.539 --> 00:35:54.619 I think this goes to what I said earlier. The 00:35:54.619 --> 00:35:57.940 means do not justify the ends, okay? I said that. 00:35:58.480 --> 00:36:00.900 You don't, it doesn't matter that so -and -so 00:36:00.900 --> 00:36:03.320 raised their children and they didn't apply any 00:36:03.320 --> 00:36:05.559 biblical principles and their kids seemed great. 00:36:06.019 --> 00:36:09.059 It doesn't give us license to do that. I was 00:36:09.059 --> 00:36:13.960 reminded here of the story of Moses in Numbers 00:36:13.960 --> 00:36:18.960 20, where the people complained and the Lord 00:36:18.960 --> 00:36:21.239 told them take your staff and go speak to the 00:36:21.239 --> 00:36:24.539 Rock. Remember that? And what did he do? He goes 00:36:24.539 --> 00:36:27.300 and strikes the rock and the rock brings forth 00:36:27.300 --> 00:36:31.460 water. It was the same end. The people got their 00:36:31.460 --> 00:36:35.719 water just like God wanted. But it didn't happen 00:36:35.719 --> 00:36:38.199 in the way that it was supposed to happen. What 00:36:38.199 --> 00:36:41.800 were the repercussions of that? Moses didn't 00:36:41.800 --> 00:36:51.699 enter the promised land. That's huge. Have you 00:36:51.699 --> 00:36:57.139 thought of that? I mean, I sympathize with Moses. 00:36:57.519 --> 00:37:00.519 Here he's got a stiff neck, rebellious people. 00:37:01.179 --> 00:37:04.460 Constantly dealing with them. Constantly bringing 00:37:04.460 --> 00:37:07.900 them to the Lord. Trying to get between them 00:37:07.900 --> 00:37:09.599 to the Lord that the Lord wouldn't wipe them 00:37:09.599 --> 00:37:12.780 out. And he's had enough. He strikes the rock. 00:37:16.400 --> 00:37:21.420 He doesn't enter. That's amazing to me. That's 00:37:21.420 --> 00:37:26.619 how serious obedience to the Lord is. It's not 00:37:26.619 --> 00:37:34.039 a small thing. The same end came about. The people 00:37:34.039 --> 00:37:38.860 were given the water, but God was not glorified 00:37:38.860 --> 00:37:50.000 in that. And Moses suffered for it. must be obedient 00:37:50.000 --> 00:37:56.360 no matter what. Or we will suffer the consequences 00:37:56.360 --> 00:38:01.519 of that. Our children will suffer for that. Our 00:38:01.519 --> 00:38:04.019 wives and our husbands will suffer for that. 00:38:04.539 --> 00:38:07.219 Society will suffer. The church will suffer. 00:38:09.619 --> 00:38:15.139 Obedience is paramount. Obedience to the Lord. 00:38:17.130 --> 00:38:20.170 in every area of our lives.