Hello, and welcome to another episode of In My
Experience with yours truly, Christine DiGinto.
This podcast is a space where I speak from lived
experience. The moments that shaped me, challenged
me, and changed the way that I understand myself
in the world. The awakenings, the breakdowns,
the moments that cracked me open, asked me to
stay present, be embodied, and be honest with
myself. I share my stories not to persuade or
define truth for anyone else, but to offer perspective,
to explore the gray areas we don't often have
language for, to slow things down and listen
more closely to what's happening beneath the
surface. You'll hear solo episodes where I reflect
on my own initiations, spiritual gifts, and the
systems that try to define me. and conversations
with guests who have walked strange, beautiful,
and sometimes painful paths of their own and
come back with wisdom to share with us. I invite
you to take what resonates, leave the rest, and
trust your own experience as valid. Thank you
for being here. This is In My Experience. Today
I have a special episode. I want to share a recorded
reading that I had done by Eagle Skyfire in January
of 2022. I wanted to share this because it was
the first time about eight months after I had
the timeline jumping experience where I sought
guidance for the first time. Um, in words, I'd
had some Reiki done, reflexology, other readings,
but none as detailed and direct as this. Uh,
so I really, really appreciated her guidance
and talking about that event that occurred for
me four years ago, or maybe even five at this
point, 2021. Yep. Five. it is, it still blows
my mind to think about. And the farther away
I go in time from that event, what sticks with
me is the feeling of fear I had. That same level
of shock is still present in my body. Like when
I think about what I felt like when I came back
into my body and I looked up and saw that screen
and person I was with was like laughing. I was
like, Oh my God, I'm done for. Um, turns out
that is not the case. So, uh, I'm just rambling
at this point, but I did ask permission from
Eagle Skyfire to share this. Uh, I talked with
her and she said it brought a smile to her face.
She was very happy to hear that. I was, uh, first
of all, listening again to the recording second
wanting to share it because the guidance that
she provided me i think would be helpful for
for many different situations and especially
if you were ever under psychic attack or have
the um you know uh empath narcissist type of
relationship or any any type of patterns where
you have been harmed by people that you love
and it's confusing um Excuse this audio. I just
listened back to see what I had so far and I
can hear myself like rubbing on my leg. I'm trying
to calm myself down, you guys. This is actually
really vulnerable to share. And the experience
that I had was very personal and very difficult
to describe within the framework of the language
that I use, which is English. Most of the time,
sometimes it's cursive. I'm just kidding. But
as I heard this again today, I listened to this
recording again all the way through. And I was
so, I just want to say it. I was so proud of
myself. I was, I am proud of myself. Not was,
I am. I am proud of myself for how I handled
that in the moment. And for how I have handled
it every moment since then. With love and compassion
to this day for that person. Because I understand.
I understand the complexities. And I'm not trying
to put him on a pedestal. As you'll hear, she
really recommends against that. But again, since
this, because again, this is 2022. We're now
in 2026. His soul has had time. Because I did
this soul retrieval that she suggested after
we got off the recording. I did the soul retrieval.
I have done many specific intentional journeys
to connect or disconnect with him and rather.
But there is something in my heart that won't
let him go. And that he's not the only one. I
hold many people. in my heart that have caused
me harm. And it's a difficult thing to do, to
choose yourself. When you have that level of
love, unconditional love and understanding, compassion,
forgiveness, as I am templated to have, it's
not easy. It's a hard knock life, let me tell
you. The hardest thing has been letting people
go and allowing the understanding that it's not
the first time and it won't be the last time
that people have tried to manipulate me for my
energy and power because there is an abundance
and it is so fucking bright. Of course they want
to snatch it up. So it's just been... It's been
a journey to come to that realization without
shame, without second guessing myself. And also
without ego. It really truly is from a place
in my soul of deep love for myself. And I really
am very proud of myself for trusting myself,
even when I didn't. And you'll hear in this.
upcoming recording, how difficult it was for
me to even give language. I mean, it took me
eight months to even be able to describe what
I was describing. And that took a lot of research
to even be able to piece together what I thought
happened to put it into words that someone else
might be able to understand. So keep that in
mind as you listen and know that I've come a
long way. But even from the very beginning, I
fucking knew. So I love it. I love it. And I
hope that this inspires you to trust yourself
as well. It's very important for us at this time
to trust our intuition and use our discernment,
even when it's not logical. We also started recording,
or my session with her was, I believe, on the
end of the week day. end of the day and it was
supposed to be a one hour session and it was
obviously more than that so God bless Eagle Skyfire.
And you can hear at some point she's really,
really very good. And I would love to learn from
her about how to even maintain time when you're
working at a level like that. Her ability to
go through what I'm saying, what my guides are
saying, what her guides are saying. I mean, like
there's a million people talking in the room
and I have other. recordings with her as well
that I'll share in the future, uh, where if,
if that's okay with her, I mean, well, I have,
like I said, in the first episode, I have so
many, so many hours of recordings that are, I
feel like it's just should be shared. So I hope
you agree. Let me know. Let me know. Send me
an email, send me a DM, rate, review, subscribe,
whatever. Let me know. Do you like this? I'm
going to do it anyway, even if you don't. But,
you know, that's me. I talked with Eagle Skyfire.
As I mentioned, I got her permission. And we
also talked about having her on as a guest. So
I'm really looking forward to that. And I'm sure
you all are as well. I haven't done it yet. I'll
let you know. But for now, enjoy. What would
you like me to look into for you today? I feel
like I need clarity. I had some sort of an awakening
within the past eight months. But I'm not sure
if it was actually spiritual or if it was interfered
with by some darkness. I don't know what I agreed
to. I think that I might have, like, I saw some
things. I know that I saw something on a level
I was shown by someone else. But I believe they
were channeled. And I didn't know about any of
these, even terms, when it happened. Right. You
were just in the middle of it happening. Yes.
So I was just responding to that. I've always
had an open mind. But I... Have shut things down
in the past because I was afraid of it. Sure.
Now I'm not afraid. Good. Because that's a big
plus. It's been so much that can't be. Right.
I can't dismiss it. Yeah. I need to address it.
Especially once you see it. Yeah. You can't unsee
it. That's the thing. But the thing is, I don't
remember what I actually saw. I remember my reaction
to it. I see. And I would like to, at some point
in the near future, go on a journey and re -see
that to have a better understanding or to understand
my karma, my past lives, why this was shown to
me, what I did wrong, what I did right, what
I need to do. Okay. It's just kind of... Lots
of things intersected, and I'm trying to figure
it out logically, and it's not all logical. No,
it's not. You're right. You're right in the square.
Well, let's do this. So the reading of spirit
is definitely the correct one for this. And in
the Native American tradition, we always start
and end with a blessing. And I think you can
tell I'm rather easygoing, so if you have questions,
you just jump in at any time. So what I'm going
to ask for you to do is, if you could put your
hands like this in a cloth, we'll begin. In a
kitchen, you open up your hands, you open up
your heart. At this time, I'd like to ask your
guardian spirit to gently guide me around your
spirit, that I may tell you the things that are
important for you to know, and kindly to remain
this way. You can sit back and relax, hang in
between what you like, and then we'll try to
disentangle as much as possible in the time that
we have. But let me start first with what's called
the flow of the river. It's your personal karmic
undercurrent that is influencing the different
things you're experiencing. So let me get to
where it's trying to get you to, and then we'll
backslide to the present to have a frame of reference.
Where it's trying to get you to is to a place
of, I'm going to say, integration. So it's not
just the spiritual. extending of your senses
if you notice there's different areas of your
life and we'll talk about how it looks like earth
girl so i'm going here from your garden spirits
perspective so it's the idea is to be able to
integrate everything all different aspects working
kind of like you you we're grateful that the
parts of our cars work in harmony so that we
can get places when we're backsliding to the
present you're being shown different elements
but classic you You don't like wasting time.
So it's like, can you just, can we just please
get this at worth? Can you just please show me
all at once? Okay. Boom. Yeah. More than one.
It was like, oh, great. So now we're going to
begin to disentangle it. So I'm going to go,
your guardian wants me to stay. Okay. So we're
going to stay here from karmic soul agreement
to give again, another level of perspective.
And then we're going to start coming down here
in the native tradition. it's always a circle
of giving and receiving. I'm borrowing the word
karma, but we don't really use that. The rough
translation would be soul lessons. So the way
that we believe is that Great Spirit gives us
lessons to learn, but we have free will on how
we want to experience them, hence the soul agreements
and different things that go on. So when you
came here, part of what you gave to the planet
was basically... You challenge people to why
are they thinking the way they're thinking. It
doesn't have to be confrontational necessarily.
But, you know, you're the one who, I'm going
to say, lights set fire, plants the seeds. All
right. So that's what you brought. And so it
makes sense. I mean, let's look at the times
that are around us. Like, duh, makes perfect
sense. But your soul also came here to study
something. So what you are receiving that's back
on this end. is how, I'm going to say, how harmony
works. I know it sounds rather broad, but when
you're here, that's why, if I look at your incarnation
right now, that's why you always come into things
where they're either ready to blow apart or they're
messy and you just don't even know how to put
them back together again. That has always been
your life, but that's your destiny. That's what
you're here to help with. But with that, your
soul is trying to understand why would, people
choose things to be fragmented. Like, why would
they not choose harmony? You know, it's a big
curiosity. It's kind of like Spock from Star
Trek trying to understand why humans who choose
emotions and logic could solve everything, right?
So the way that it, so now we're going to get
more into current time, but you can see as to
why in this lifetime you love solving problems
you like for helping things to, I'm going to
say, move along. But you can also see why in
this lifetime, and you're getting better, things
would always be, I'm going to say dramatic, like
one extreme, like this, like, oh my God, you
know, get seasick watching the pendulum go. So
now you are at a stage not only of chronological
maturity, you're now at a stage of soul maturity.
Up now beginning to understand how things really
work. It's taking you this long to see all the
different elements of everything. And then we're
going to go about divine law and all this other
stuff, right? So here, because in order to be
able to live your life more fully, in order to
be able to help people and also like helping
animals more fully, this is a work of heart as
much as it is of mind, right? So with that, part
of what is happening now is a, I'm going to say,
a reestablishing. Right now, the way things have
been done, I don't quite agree with, but we'll
get to that in a moment. So because, and of course,
you know, you have your personal goals, this
goes to say, so not everything is going to be,
again, that's why I'm a nerd, like Star Trek,
logical, like Vulcan, Spock world. It's a work
of heart. It's a work of feeling and instinct
as much as it is anything else. I'm going to
go how part of a past life broke through into
this one and then how to smooth things over.
The way that you had, you're calling it an awakening,
I guess it was. I don't agree with the way that
it happened. I'm going to take a little sidestep.
What it reminds me of is when you have a child
and you introduce them to sex in the wrong way
and too early. I'll just be blunt about it. It's
my opinion. So it's knowledge that needs to come
if you're going to be human. But there's a way
of introducing things and the timing to all things.
This was violated with you. Right? So we're going
to work with it. Part of a past life. that ran
into this one is that I'm going to say the person
or the agent that introduced this, pardon me.
So all my eyes, um, I'm feeling as if this was
a piece of spider revenge, just like here, like
this versus what it was supposed to be a gentle
introduction. Right. So that's why, and pardon
me when I, when I'm using the sexual thing as
a parallel, because, you know, The act of intimacy
itself is not a curse, but if introduced the
wrong way, it can feel like it and leave permanent
mark. What I'm feeling here energetically is
that from this past life, this person and the
spirit attached, in essence, you said, no, you
chose a different path. You didn't like the way
they were going. Rightfully so. And in this lifetime,
Because I feel there's a person attached to it,
such as a spirit. It's like the feeling of one
-upmanship or getting even, like this. Or the
rude gesture. But you know what I mean? So, this
was the method that was chosen. Right? Good news.
You're not cursed. You're not hexed. Right? Is
it screwing things up? Yes. That's why when you
introduce intimacy in the wrong way, it can totally
screw somebody up. So we're going to take a step
backwards. So I'm going to disentangle a little
bit more. Fortunately for you, I'm going to see
your destiny, your karma has not been, you know,
completely derailed. Okay. You're still on track.
Okay. All right. So let's just establish. Let's
get rid of that boogeyman right now. All right.
What you want to grow in your career and for
yourself is still on track, right? This is meant
to be a gift. That's what it's meant to be. It
was introduced this way so that it can enhance
what you're wanting to grow in your life. And
ultimately, it's going to get there, right? I'm
just dealing with the, I'm going to call it a
wound that was created right now. So any questions
so far? Before we go any further. I totally agree
with everything you said. And it's clear that
you have direct knowledge. I don't know if this
was my husband or a situation that I went outside
of. Like, I don't know who did it. I don't know.
Like I did it. I allowed it ultimately. Yes,
I know. But that's like saying, pardon me. That's
like saying a sex victim. You allowed it. You
know what I'm saying? Kind of. I don't buy that.
I'm sorry. I mean, I humbly agree to disagree
with you. Yes. I went outside of my marriage
and this happened, but I don't know if it was
actually this person or if. Something came into
them. Like I literally was like, I think you're
the devil, but I. Yeah. I'm not sensing it's
your husband, to be honest with you. I saw that
it actually was a gift though, to even have this
information and be able to reflect and be open
to. Right. All of it. Right. It's very painful.
Sure. But from pain comes growth. Like it's was,
but it just was so much. So it's, it hurts me.
Yeah. And I. I still care about that person.
Right. Even though I'm pretty sure he hurt me.
Yeah, I'm not getting this from your husband.
No, no. With your husband, it's not his style.
And if you pardon me saying so, he just, I'll
just keep it as not his style. Like, it's not
his style. I'm not going to move beyond that.
I can't go beyond that. The other individual.
Yeah, it is. Yeah, it is. And emotional manipulation
is not an unusual thing. So it's not just you.
So I feel compassion for someone that doesn't
know love or show and not show true love. Like
it hurts me. So I want to show compassion. If
that makes sense. It does. It does. And that
speaks to you. But let's separate things. Right?
Let's separate things. And I'm going to talk
about what this person did and also honor you
as well. For me, this is part, again, of that
past life and wanting that revenge. Because you
walked away in the past life. And now it's like
this. I'm going to take you completely out of
the picture for the moment and look at this individual,
right? They're not evil, but they can be vindictive.
And messing with emotions is not an unusual thing.
Bringing you back into the picture, getting you
hooked emotionally. And trying to create a codependent
relationship. I'll put it into 21st century terms.
Right? And I'm sorry, but I also see as if gaslighting
took place as well. Right? So, you know, your
gut is telling you one thing and this person
is telling you something else. Regardless of
which. So the reason why I'm looking at the mechanics
of it and then we're going to look at the spiritual
overlay. is with that, your karma with this individual
is done. Right? So, how can I say? There was
the opportunity, if we were to go, I'm going
to say the opportunity was for there to be a
reintroduction of the two of you at a better
time. And allowing, instead of forcing things
like we tried to force things back then too,
for things to evolve i'm going to see with more
respect and more naturally we didn't do it this
time yet so that's why it's not your destiny
to be attached to this individual and what they
have to work through and for you to go on track
with your life i understand that you have compassion
for this individual and i think that's great
but let's talk about the type of compassion One
form of compassion is not enabling behavior.
And with that, I know you'd like to do more and
so forth, but understand that now this person,
they're using this as a survival strategy, not
wanting to change. So that's why I had to pull
you out of the picture. I like looking at them
individually. This is a strategy we use over
and over again, not just with you. So the strategy
of getting somebody's, I'm going to say having
their vulnerabilities, knowing which emotional
buttons to push, and then confusing somebody
through their emotions to be able to go to the
direction that they want them to go. And you're
positive this isn't my husband? Because that
literally sounds like him in this life that I
just could never understand. Say one thing and
do another. But he doesn't have the spiritual
overlay. Okay. So even though with your husband
there can be similarities to what I'm talking
to you about, he doesn't have that spiritual
overlay. Because this individual also is using
what we call spiritual or psychic ability. Because
it happened naturally fast, like it's in a natural...
Yeah, I felt like I got broken into, basically.
Yeah. Yeah, it was like pressure here. And I
was, yeah, it was, yeah, that was, and he could
read my mind. Correct. And that's not your husband.
I was like, I mean, to be honest, I was impressed.
I was like, that's pretty cool because I've never
experienced anything like that. But I also felt
like it was not. It is. So let me describe what
that aspect is. Right. And if you notice, your
husband doesn't do that. No. Right. That's just
that I know it's on him. Okay. Not that I know
of. Unless he's better at hiding. Who knows?
Okay, don't be blunt about it. The guy is mostly
a muggle. Okay, okay, okay. All right. He's also
mostly a muggle. In the Native teaching, what
we call the throne of the soul, or heart with
a capital H, the voice is roughly from the chakra
that includes the third chakra to the solar plexus.
The throne of the soul is where you connect with
the creator. the creation into your higher sacred
self when someone tampers with that you begin
they can actually begin to you get as if you're
in a fog you get confused as to your thoughts
are they your thoughts it's like you get disconnected
from yourself and then your life starts going
sideways right and the reason being is that the
the throne of the soul the heart also is a mechanism
by which you know we each have a rhythm in our
lives that we consider to be normal. So considered
to be like the regulator. So when that gets interfered
with everyday life, things get to go crazy and
they make no logical sense. They just start flying
off the rails because the mechanism that helps
for things to synchronize spirit experience with
physical earth gets disabled. So if you found
that. bad luck or things started happening. That's
why it was more an awareness that it's, it can
be manipulated. Correct. And that I was not,
if you, if you control the heart of a person,
you control, you control it all. I felt like
I was getting, um, messages like I suddenly could.
I felt like I knew when people were around me,
like seeing outlines and hearing voices. And
it was not psychotic. It was not in my brain.
I'm a shaman, so you totally get it. I know how
to handle that. And I'm not sure if that happened
trying to warn me or if that happened just because
I was then open to stuff. But I don't think I
interpreted things correctly. Well, we're going
to get down piece by piece. So what happened
is when you were broken open, again, ahead of
time, then, as I said to you, to be able to have
extended senses, that was part of your soul agreement
with the Great Spirit. That was part of the original
thing that's supposed to play out. The matter
that it was done was not. So when that happened,
that became activated. Consider it to be, and
we're going to talk about the vision thing that
you saw. I'm just talking this overall ability
that became activated was a safety because it
allowed for you that even though your mind and
your emotions were confused, it's that what allowed
for you to have that awareness that something
was not right and the need to break away. And
then that ability remained open. It remained
open. What is this ability? Being able to see
spirits. Being able to communicate and receive
messages. And right now it is sensing and ultimately
it will be to channel energy. That's in its fully
fledged form. Right? But for now, that's why
we're going to talk about the experience that
you had. It was awakened early, but also used
to help to save you from the situation. Okay.
Because as far as I'm concerned, forgive me,
and you can see my eyes usually don't get hard,
that individual's a vampire. Okay. You know,
and that's why I know you can have the feelings
when I honor that. But it's like, you know, like
the vampires, they can make somebody desire them.
Mm -hmm. And do this. Yeah, I'm like, in my past,
I've been like, not like obsessive but it's like
strong feeling strongly yeah but not like this
yeah this is like not not not natural natural
yeah it's almost like my memories were like replaced
and it's like was he always there was he you
know that's part of the gaslighting i'm talking
about okay that's the gaslighting okay and confusing
yeah and then the part that was connected that
ability and also that that sense was your guardian
spirit and part of your higher self saying Even
though you can't hear me clearly, you know, there's
something wrong. Get away. Yeah. Yeah. I did
sense there was something wrong. Correct. And
I don't know how it went from that to being like,
okay, I don't, I, it's like, I saw something
and then I forgot what I saw like right away.
Correct. Because that's part of the control.
Okay. That's part of the control. Okay. That's
why I, when you listen to this recording, That's
the first thing that I tracked was, okay, how
far did she get pushed off of her, of her path?
And it's like, no, say here's your path and you're
like parallel like this. Okay. So it won't take
much to put you back. Okay. Like this. Cause
again, fortunately for you, you, you, these abilities
were supposed to be part of this incarnation.
Okay. I suppose that they've been not. then that's
something else entirely. There's still, the difference
being is now we help to remove the taint of this
individual. You embrace, you know, this is the
world of the X -Men. You discovered you're a
mutant. All right. Yeah. And then, and then you
train them out. That's it. And they begin to
enhance your life was, was, was the original
design and agreement with creator spirit. Okay.
So that's why with this individual, Let me just
ask the Thunder Brothers. They're the ones who
walk with me. And you can feel free. I know you
can see and sense them, so go ahead. Feel free.
See, I don't know what I sense. I feel like sometimes
I see little black spots moving around. It's
just kind of like a... We'll work with that together
before you leave so we can feel more comfortable.
Yeah. I mean, I'm not uncomfortable. I just don't
know what it is. We're going to work with them.
We're going to give you, we're going to, I'm
not going to leave you. I almost feel like I
could just, I wish I could just see them and
hear them. And it's like, I won't be scared.
No, but you can sense that at least I would know
what I'm dealing with. Right. But when I sense
it and I don't know what I'm dealing with, it
was a major trust breach of trust. And so then
I have fear and I feel like that's holding me
back. Correct. And that's why part of what I
want to do is to give you some basic tools so
you can go. Okay. Yeah. Let the shoulders drop
a little bit. You know what I'm saying? So with
that, what I'm being told is I'm going to give
you something very basic to do because this individual
still has some attachments on you. And that's
why if you notice it's, it's just irrational
that you keep on thinking in this, this draw.
Yeah. And it's very much like the legend of the
vampire when they begin to bite somebody, then
doing one of these. So. The reason being is that
when you gave yourself, it really was in a pure
way. It really was very, very pure. Because something
this malicious is out of your scope. Yeah. You
can't even imagine somebody operating at this
level. Yeah. It was basically an understanding
that people and things can be manipulated. But
I wasn't feeling that. It was more like I observed
things in my surroundings. Correct. And I felt
like I could. control things and then it's like
but i don't want to because if you want to then
you're dark like anyone who loves would never
try to control another person yeah like you can't
do that that's you cannot do that yeah so then
i um basically i guess the confusion was i thought
he was trying to help me right part of the gaslighting
yeah it's part of the gaslighting that i'm detecting
that's why i'll be blunt this person's new good
okay right um I would say borderline evil. I'm
sorry. I've been around for a long time. Good
news is I'm going to give you something basic
to do, right? Is what he did was, even though
you've done a good enough job of kind of shutting
the door, there's still a couple hooks here.
And in the shamanic way, he has a shard of you.
That's what he does. It's like a piece missing,
like there's a piece missing, right? And that's
what I want to describe to you. It's not, um,
you know, you don't feel whole or solid. Like
there's still like some piece of feels off. Okay.
And I hope you don't mind. I'm kind of cramming
everything together and then I'm going to give
you steps to do. Okay. You're not in danger.
Right. Breathe. It's okay. If you can imagine
the soul again, where the heart is being like
a beautiful gem. A living gem. When it has a
little bit of pressure, like a gem, it can have
stress lines. Push a little bit more and some
shards fall out. So he pushed enough so a couple
shards fell out. But because, again, you know
love, you don't know this type of manipulation,
you willingly say, here's a part of me. And he
said, sure. If you notice, he never gave himself
equally back. Never equal. Because the idea is
to take power, to take energy. So here, what's
happening is that you're beginning to heal, but
that piece is missing. Which is why if you're
going to say, this is stupid, why do I keep on
thinking of this guy? Why this? Why this? Because
the soul will always long for itself. The good
news is that he's not so strong that it's not
going to be like, you know, the epic battle of
Godzilla versus King Kong here. So I'll give
you a very basic native way. It's basically what
it is. It's a soul retrieval. That's what it
is. So you can, again, in the native way, we
give everything back to creator spirit. And then
asking the name of creator spirit and everything,
again, that everything be restored in harmony
as it's meant to be. And you can get a candle
in your favorite color, whatever you want it
to be. And then we would say in native style.
You sit so that you're facing the north. So here,
like say, you know, here, this is actually south,
so the north facing north. The reason why we
say that is for us, we say that's where the sacred
beings are, the path, you call the path to heaven,
the path to the sacred. So say you're here, the
candle's here, giving back to creator that flame
represents the breath of the one God. Okay. And
then from here, you're going to ask your guardian
spirit, your guardian angel, if you will, to
please, if there's anything that you have of
his, which I don't feel that you do, but that
you want for it to be returned. And then your
guardian will do that. It gets purified through
that sacred fire. But if there's anything he's
holding on of you, that it gets retrieved. purified
through that sacred fire and then restored back
to you does that make sense yes and then what's
going to happen is here it's very interesting
oh here we go okay one of those like the music
of the ancestors to be playing in the background
okay and one of those one of those people so
what's going to happen is that don't be surprised
that after you dedicate everything back to the
creator spirit you know, the space, everything
for us, we'd say you bless up with smoke. That
you suddenly feel the need to say everything
that you've wanted to say. Don't leave anything
out. If that happens, you don't have to be nice.
Okay. Okay. You can get colorful if you like.
Okay. But the idea is that you're releasing,
you're not holding anything back. but then asking
your guardian don't be surprised if you feel
a beautiful warmth if you feel a beautiful warmth
what have you it won't be dark it won't be scary
it'll be very familiar because it'll be your
guardian spirit and the ones who love you i it's
so hard for me to understand i guess i was just
tricked but like those feelings were real but
they were the feelings were real but the way
that they were invoked were fake okay i i thought
that he gave me back a piece of my soul like
i felt i had all this energy like i don't know
what that was he it was like he implanted something
what apart that's what i'm saying that's why
this exchange needs to happen okay so even though
he did give part of i'm going to say his energy
he's smart enough to be a part of his own spirit
it acted like a catalyst that blew the rest of
this over okay that's like a jump start like
lightning yeah you know so that's what i said
to you so it acted as a jump start i'm trying
to explain the mechanism of it and not to be
weird but i don't know how i could ever be in
a relationship without like with anyone other
than someone that's like spiritual enough to
be like that but not dark I don't know. Like
there are people out there, right? Because I
can't, there are, I can't not. Yeah. I like need
that now. Cause it's like, I don't know how you
would just go back to being like, I can't, you
just go, you're a mutant. You can't go back to
being an army. That's correct. I can't. So that's
why I'm trying to share with you. So what happened
is that there was that implant of energy. So,
so how you can keep tabs and do what you want
it to do. And he willingly gave part of yourself.
So an even stronger time control. you're strong
-willed enough to begin shutting things down.
And this is now the last little bit. So don't
be too surprised that after you do this, number
one, you're going to feel solid and whole again.
That's just what I feel like. And you'll suddenly
this, because it's not obsession. We talked about
this weirdness. Yeah. That's going to go. It
is like a man. It's like it's images in my mind.
And I'm like, and it's also a weird feeling.
Yeah. And it's like, yeah, because they're connected.
Okay. That's going to go. And then what's going
to happen is part of your expanded senses are
going to dull. But that's okay. They were artificially
blown too far open. They're going to dull, not
shut completely, so that they can grow the way
that they're meant to. Okay. Gently. All right.
So because your eyes are now open, they're not
going to be shut again. They're not supposed
to be in this lifetime. We talked about that.
But instead of it being like this, and it's confusing
things, it'll go down to a level that it's meant
to be. Okay. And then with patience, teaching,
practice, then you choose how they're going to
grow and develop and to move versus this artificial
thing that's going on right now. Okay. Yeah.
Pardon me. I can't stand vampires. It's one of
my things. So any questions so far? Please, let's
do it. Was my, what I said after whatever I saw,
I saw. Let's talk about that. What exactly did
you see? Let's talk about it. I don't know what
I saw. Or if you can describe it. There were
two different things. Like, I was not asleep,
but I, it's like I could see things above me.
Sure. Kind of like a movie. I don't know how
to explain it. Yeah, no, I get it. But I saw
myself swinging a punch at my father. And then
when I saw that, then it stopped. And he laughed.
He was laughing. And I didn't know what that
was. And I felt like I was being made to do things.
Like I was being made to do that. Like in a dream
state. But somehow I caught it. And I'll never
forget it. And I know what happened. So then
whatever else I saw at another time, I don't
know how long this took. You know, when I jumped
up and said, oh, my God, is it like the Truman
Show? And then I had a really strong sense of
something happening to children. And that this
was like a regularly occurring thing that happens
to kids and people break into their dreams and
like hurt them somehow. I said, nothing weird
with kids. And then I thought about it for a
little bit and was like, maybe this is the way
it works. And I'm like, if that's how it works,
but you can't hurt kids. Like you can't hurt
kids. And my daughter is very. open and strong
and that's mostly what even made me be open -minded
besides when i was little sure and our own ancestral
whatever sure yeah it runs in bloodline so yeah
she is i fear that she gets like i don't know
if the word is channeled or whatever is happening
but things that she was saying to me were not
normal and i would try to just be normal. This
is all strange. Everyone is strange around me,
but I just am going to be me because that's who
I am. I don't know what else to do, but I'm going
to just try my best to put peace out there. And
I am concerned for my daughter and I, does anyone
have access to my daughter's mind or is she safe
enough? Well, she's safe enough. I'm talking
as a mom. And I know how critical that is. It
doesn't matter how old they are. Yeah. So the
ones who are with her are strong enough to, I'm
going to say, to protect her. But because of
this vampire, again, is able to have feelers.
So I'm going to give one mom to another. She's
safe. She's not going to be thrown off her track.
There's not going to be permanent scars. Because
I'd be very honest. All right. But that's why
even right now, let's put it this way. Since
you walked into this room that has certain sacred
seals in it, do you feel the difference in energy,
the quiet of mind? What do you sense? I feel
very warm. Yeah. I feel a lot of trust. And do
you feel more like yourself with a clear mind
than you have? Yeah. That's the tell. That's
the tell. So if you notice you feel more solid
than entirely, but you're now more together,
that's the tell. Good. Yeah, I feel like I'm
somewhere else. Like half of my, half of me is.
swirling down a drain like at all times and i'm
just like i don't know what i'm living for but
like i know that i don't need to die no like
i'm not i don't want to be negative i don't want
to be sad no but i feel very sad right so let's
let's sort it a little bit further so that's
why here um and in native way it's giving and
receiving equally so say if you choose again
this is a very simple with the candle you can
even write a same and burn it, and then release
the ashes. I release you after the exchange does.
But giving and receiving equally. So even you
say in the name of creator and in gratitude for
my healing that is coming, it could be an act
of kindness. It could be feeding the animals
who are going to be dealing with the frosty cold.
So we always give, we're a gifting culture, giving
and receiving equally. And then what's going
to happen? So again, If you noticed, I guess
for me, the most important is that we shut the
door on this one. So, and that's to say, if you
want the acid test, and I firmly believe a skeptical
mind is important. You can be completely spiritual
and have a skeptical mind. That's why I'm a shaman.
I like science. Okay. It's like, what? It's like,
yeah, I'm a spiritual teacher and I like science.
Get over it. Yeah. All right. That makes sense
to me. The heart and the mind are meant to work
together. That's the point of it, you know? Yeah.
But if you want to do the asset test and I would
invite you and try to say, this is all in my
head, really try it. Cause it's kind of like
if you stand up and you scream in this chair,
that it's an elephant, it's still going to be
a chair, right? No matter what you do to it.
Yeah. So what I would like for you to do is walk
outside of this room, check in and see how you
feel and say, you know what? Feeling different
in Skyfire's room is all in my head. Try and
bust it. Go ahead. Give it a shot. And then come
back in here and you tell me. I want you to try
it. And this is part of it. This is the difference
between good and evil. Good will say test it.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Go ahead and try it. But see
what happens. Be open. Now come in here without
saying anything and still try to test it, refute
it, try to debunk it. No, I feel lighter in my
heart. I just, I feel like it's easier to breathe
when you're in here. Correct. And if you notice
the clarity, find it. And how did it feel when
you went out there? It's like physical and emotional.
Let me try to like, but did you notice how you
started going out of alignment when you're out
there? And when you came in here? Yeah. I started
to think about, um, the person like kind of entered
my mind again, like right away. Yeah. And I said,
I want you to try it, debunk it, push it because
truth will stand. That's the thing. Truth stands.
So that's why I said, yeah, I don't want you
to say, oh, yeah. No, I said, you know, it was
just on my head that I felt good in Skyfire's
room. It's just, you know, whatever. It's because
I wanted to. But if you noticed, boom, there
it was. Yeah. Right? So that's proof. So the
good news is that the fact that this attachment
is so easily dispelled is that you can do this.
Okay. You can do this. But notice the difference
of how you feel. Yeah. Now I'm scared to let
go. Don't be scared. I feel like there's a lot
where I am. There's a lot. Yeah. It's not mine.
We're going to go step by step. Okay. But this
is important. So the reason why I needed for
you to test and to push, because that is the
difference between good and evil. Anybody's worth
a damn. If you test respectfully, he's not going
to mind it at all. It should be. So. That's why
I would say to you, in Native way, for us to
be the smudging and the gifting to the seven
directions. But even if you go in a sacred space
that's clean and clear and say, you know, you
could do it without smoke, you could even do
it with music. And say, and I'm dedicating this
back to a creator. And asking, and in gratitude
to the creator and those who are with me, to
help me to reclaim and to... release what is
not mine and then just open your heart and you
could even have a whispering from your own guardian
spirit saying maybe an act of kindness to the
animals that are dealing with the cold you know
doing this it comes and then again that light
representing the fire of the creator spirit and
that candle becomes a secret candle as much as
it be in any synagogue church ashram So that
when you begin to pray and meditate and center,
it carries the blessing. And if you want, I don't
have to do it because you have the power to do
it. But I'll be happy to bless it. But think
about it as a mom. Don't you always bless everything
for your child so she can be safe? Yeah. And
the love and energy you put in it? I used to.
Now I'm not myself, to be honest. Yeah, because
of this interference. Yeah. Because this energy,
is poison to a vampire. It's poisonous. Good.
Yeah. Good. So when you reconnect with that...
Then why would he want that? Why would he, like,
I guess... Think about it. Because it's valuable?
Because it was pure? Valuable, it was pure, it
was power. Yeah. You know, it's kind of like,
I'm going to be a total nerd, but it's kind of
like... Have you ever seen Harry Potter? When
Voldemort kills the unicorn? And he becomes a
cursed being. He gets to live, but he lives as
a cursed being because he killed something so
innocent and pure. Oh, well, that makes sense.
So here is not physical death, nor is it your
destiny. Okay. But to hold something like this,
and that's what I'm looking at. Sorry, you can
just see the look in my eyes. It's like, oh,
I know your number, honey. I see you many times.
Your time. All right. But the good news is this
one has basically no power over you. That's why
it's as simple as this. And he passed away in
this life. Mm -hmm. Yeah, but holding on to this,
he, by doing this... That was me because I was
confused. And by holding on to this piece of
you, he hopes to not have to go to complete.
what he has earned. If I hold on to this part
of you to try to hold himself closer to the earth
plane, I'd have to answer to his conduct. Yeah,
we don't have a view of heaven and hell in the
native way, but we believe it is a secret wheel
of giving and receiving. As you do, it comes
back to you. Yeah. So by doing this, it's wanting
to cheat that. Yeah, you can't. It's funny because
I thought that that was like the feelings and
thoughts that I had trying to rationalize. And
also it's like visions and feeling. It's like
all the pain in the world hurt me. And then it's
like, but we choose this. And some things we
don't choose, but the pain creates growth, creates
strength, creates value, creates wisdom. I'm
like, it all just is, even though I wish it didn't
happen. Right. But there's a place where you
could go beyond that. And people who do things
like that are allowed. And I know that for sure.
But I was like, it's not like a place like everything
is here. It's just levels of energy. Yeah. And
I'm like. And then, yeah, you're correct. You're
not crazy. You are correct. But you have people
who choose to behave in an evil way. I'm sorry,
I'm going to call it. You know, he's not evil
yet. Souls can't evolve. And by doing this, hope
to cheat versus the way that you're doing it
is the right way. You are aware. In the old way,
we say, and I'm going to 21st century it. Pain
in life is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
Yeah. Right. But you're doing it the right way.
It's like, you know what? I will own what is
mine. And with that, I will gain wisdom, whether
it be greater joy or greater depth. But you don't
hold anyone captive. You're not, you see what
I'm saying? This person, all they want is what
they can hold in this way. so that's why you
want to and what i would ask is when you do this
bit with the releasing ceremony we'd call releasing
you have the person same and even because it's
like releasing somebody's physical ashes okay
is ask for and i'm gonna i want to work with
your traditions and i'll translate is there a
particular um set of spiritual traditions or
Okay. Not at all. Okay. It's just love. Just
everything. Yeah, that's what it is. I don't
have a religion. It just is. Neither do we. For
ours, it's a spiritual walk. That's all it is.
So when you do this, giving everything back to
Creator, in addition to your guardian spirit,
ask that we, well, it would be, say, the Lord
of Transformation. There's a particular spirit
or an angel in this culture that makes sure,
that everyone and everything is where they need
to be. You know, if I go for the angelic, I believe
it's Asriel, I believe. But in the native, we
would just say, again, because there's only one
king. So we would ask this, again, that a sacred
spirit be sent to help with this soul healing.
Everybody gets back what is theirs. And that
for everyone to go to where they are supposed
to be. And that's what you're doing. So you are
restored and you're back here with your daughter,
your household and the stuff that you know. And
that this individual goes to where they need
to be and is escorted so they harm no one else
in the meantime. And with that, a natively very
firm believer said everyone receives what they've
earned. That's what it is. You know? Yeah. That's
it. And even though when you begin to do this,
expect for the phone to ring, interruptions,
expect all of these, some of these shadows to
appear because everything will be done to stop.
The minute that you do this, he's forced to go
to answer and to go forward on the journey that
he's been trying to avoid. I don't know why that
still scares me. It's funny when I'm by myself,
I know that like my mind is, I don't know, like
accounted for. Sure. Like, and someone has access
to it more than one person. And it kind of scared
me. Like I really felt like someone was in my
soul. Like I didn't want to look in the mirror.
I felt funny in the shower. I felt like people
were like above me. More than one person, even.
Like, I feel like he let other people in. Of
those who were attached to him. Yeah. Yeah. But
that's why when you do this, all of that, everyone
and everything and everybody, it's restored to
where they're supposed to be. Okay. That's the
point. Okay. It's funny. It felt like, it did
feel like he was making fun of me and like it
was a joke. Yeah. But I was like, but even if
it is, this is how I feel. And even if he's hurting
me, that's how I felt. And I'm not stupid and
I'm not silly. And love is love and love is powerful.
I am okay. I'm a good person. I'm not a bad person.
And anyone who would make fun of you for being
like that or thinking like that is not good.
And it's funny that I did think that way, but
I still thought of him as giving me a gift to
even be able to realize that. And I still like
idolize because it's like, well, I would never
take it back because now I have such a deep understanding
of that is real. And thank goodness you've turned
it. It is a gift and you've turned and you recognize
and you turn it into the way that it was given
was still incorrect. Yeah. That sense when you
listen to the beginning of this recording. Right.
Yeah. Learning about this is a very intimate
thing. Yeah. And there's a way of having it unfold.
That wasn't it. Yeah. And wanting to hold on
to it and misuse it. That's not it. Yeah. I would
never. Yeah. And that's beyond your scope of
imagining. Yeah. An average good person doesn't
operate that way. But someone who is like that,
they do. Say, well, somebody wouldn't do this
unless they love me in some way. Because that's
the way you operate. That's not the way someone
like that operates. Yeah. Yeah. So that's where
the mind is trying to reconcile. Yeah. You know,
and say, well, you know what? Let me reconcile
it with it that I am a good person and there
was a part of me that this was out of my scope
of awareness and he took advantage of that nativity.
Yeah. He took wrongful advantage of it. But I
think, like, it's feeling that way and then it's
like, but I definitely was. Your feelings were
genuine. Yeah. Your feelings were genuine, but
the way he, he made them happen was artificial.
Yeah. It definitely seemed manipulated. Correct.
Energy, like literal electricity and things.
I'm like, well, if anyone, if you can do that,
then like nothing's real and nothing matters,
but we're here in this life and everything does
matter. And I would never be dangerous or hurt
anymore because everything does matter. But on
a level, nothing matters because it's over and
over and over. And if you can do things like
that, then this is real. And it does matter because
it's like trying to understand to. And this is
what we would call the balance. So because you
are good and it's not your destiny, so you're
sitting here. Because of his way and what he
has earned is why he's not. So yeah, it does
matter. It does matter. And if you want to talk
about manipulation, let me give you something
that we actually enjoy and do every day. Think
about when you watch a favorite program. You
let yourself be open and the soundtrack and the
actors and you can cry because you allow yourself
to be manipulated in that moment. That attachment
to his emotions. He did something similar. But
this is a movie that he didn't sign up to see
it by the ticket. Yeah. Yeah. It's interesting.
I thought it was simple. I thought maybe everyone
went through this. I'm like, is it because I
sinned? Is it because I went against my husband?
Is it like... No. Like it was like the literal...
Sure. Yeah, well, you're trying to figure out
the cause and effect. Like, what happened? Yeah.
No. Again, that's where I want to go from a past
life. And what was the potential, which was...
for this individual in their lifetime was female
to behave differently in this lifetime? Or we
just did the same thing again? Was I male in
this past life? In that past life, you were the
male. That's funny because I did also think that
there was a question like bodies don't matter
because righteousness can be anywhere. Anything
can be manipulated. on a crazy level like i was
like philosophically and like you know i was
like wow that makes sense and then the more i
was like huh maybe the crazier shit got and i
was like well that's i mean that is that is happening
and this person just said that or i just saw
that or this is what i felt and that's okay because
i'm here and i'm me and I'm safe. And you are.
And let's share. So I'm going to share with you
the teachings from my people. For us, we say,
again, what the Great Spirit, it's the Great
Spirit who brings our souls into being, that
designs us, if you will. And it is the Great
Spirit that chooses what we need to do and what
we're meant to learn. However, we have the gift
of free will to choose and have experience. Hence,
soul agreements like this. So for us, it's a
co -creation always of mutual respect that comes.
It's not a dictation like this. So yes, we are
beings of light. We're part of the breath of
the creator spirit. In Native, this lifetime,
we're human. Maybe next lifetime, if we need
to learn cooperation, we might come back as a
honeybee. Who knows? But it's still that safe
creator says, I need you to learn to work in
greater coordination. So, but you don't need
a long lesson. A honeybee worker bee only lives
six weeks. And you say, well, you know what?
Maybe I would like to learn that, but maybe where
I could really feel surrounded by a lot of love
and sisterhood. Do you see what I mean? So it's
always a co -creation. And not just, so this
is when you're saying, and this is like, Yeah,
we're beings of light and so forth, but it's
not a random anybody gets free range. We call
it the dream weave of which, aka the dream catchers,
are symbolic of that. It's not just capturing
bad dreams. One of the deeper teachings is that
we weave with the creator. We weave. So in this
lifetime, because there's a part of you that
wondered, is not only to experience the feminine
and divine feminine but wondered what that experience
would be like you know and at this point if we
go with the greater you're not the only wheel
that's turning right now we need the divine feminine
to get this planet back in balance yeah i was
seeing basically that the i thought that since
we're all magic can't we all put our intention
to heal and we don't need to be here because
here is any but not getting crazy because it's
like i would never run out in the street and
like yell at someone i would never hurt myself
or anyone else because i know that i'm just here
but also thinking and feeling. And it's like
getting confused sometimes by other people's
thoughts and feelings. Like I take that in and
I'm like, yeah, that's probably not mine. But
yeah, I basically thought that I was like getting
a chance to be reset and that I can literally
make anything in my life be. And it's like, well,
what, what body do you want to be? Like, are
you a girl or a boy? Obviously I'm a girl. And
I'm not gay. And I look like me. I'm me. I'm
me. I don't need to be somebody else. But I really
thought that it was like, you can just take over
other people's bodies. That's what I was getting.
That's what I was getting. And I'm like, you
can't do that, though. You cannot do that. That's
evil. In Native, we call them skinwalkers. Okay.
I felt like he wasn't really actually the person
that I knew. Correct, because he started being
taken over by the things that he was, I'm going
to say, working with. So he consciously did that,
and something jumped into him that was connected
to me in a past life? That was probably trying
to get me, maybe. That's what I'm saying. So
this comes to here. Good news is that we can
get off this whirly gig. Okay, good. And that
he and the beings that are attached to him can
go where they need to go. And you and the ones
who walk with you are here and you grow healthy
and strong on your path. That's all that needs
to be focused on right now. Okay. Thank you for
saying that and verifying that because I really
did feel like he was not even like actually him.
Like, I really did feel like it was other people
in his body, and I was aware of that, and I let
that happen. Like, I can say I sensed that he
was not him, and I still was like, okay. But
you couldn't have stopped it anyway because he
was choosing that. And the beings of evil, they
have no boundaries. Now you understand how evil
operates. Yeah, it was a lot. That's how evil
operates, my dear. I was concerned that that
was happening to my daughter. She is protected
enough, but the love of a mother is a very strong
thing. So with that, you can ask and empower
the ones who walk with her to give stronger strength
and protection. And it runs in bloodlines. So,
okay, you're here now. So the one would be learning
about how to handle your gift of empathy, which
is why if you walk, it's hard to discern the
boundaries between people's emotions and your
own. There is a part of you that's also telepathic.
So it's not just his. Once you remove him, part
of it's going to dull down again because this
is artificial, but not shut completely so it
can grow naturally. good because it's hard for
me to live a normal life like normal from like
what before what i thought like yep yep and then
i am like well i know what i used to do but for
whatever reason i like it's like really hard
for me to function right because of that awareness
right like well it is i still need to function
right but i feel so sad and i don't want to like
it's it's yeah yeah there's a lot that's going
on so What's going to happen? That's why I'm
letting you know that when you begin to do this
releasing and you ask these higher divine forces
to intercede, be prepared. That's so funny. This
is on random. That's part of the bear chant.
The bear is power, justice, protection. The bear
says what the lion is to European. so since you
have a child you know like aslan from narnia
uh -huh the bear would be like our like our aslan
oh okay that's just like okay that's okay got
it anyway it's on random as you know i'm not
touching the thing yeah that's yeah it was a
lots of interference that i'm i didn't know correct
seems manipulated though like it didn't seem
like god or spirit i was like this can't be Just
that. This is him and the ones attached to him
that are trying to cheat. So once you begin,
that's why I think it's very interesting. It's
like, okay. Persevere. Ask for these higher forces.
They're going to intercede for you and then also
for your daughter. And then from here, now that
you know that you're a mutant. it's funny because
i kind of always knew i just my husband would
dismiss me that when i was was so busy yeah doing
everyday things well sure sure this is it's all
right now it's like wandavision but anyway so
then you're going to learn a couple things the
first one is going to be um again just your gift
of empathy right then I'm going to recommend
a book now that you have to buy one. I'm a firm
believer, as you can tell, of testing, pushing,
looking first. And it's called Psychic Development
for Beginners. Okay. I use it as a textbook when
I teach people. What I like about Hewitt, he's
safe, he's ethical. You can roll up your sleeves
and they're good exercises. And what it does
is that it runs the whole gamut of different
abilities. So you see which ones go click and
others are going to go clunk. So you begin to
naturally go, oh, so even though, you know, it's
some spirit ability and so forth, but it gives
you exercises. What's really nice is that with
your daughter, how old's your daughter now? Four.
Okay. What's really nice is that you can even
work with her, like, you know, with colors, you
know, like the colors of the angels, like the
colors and connecting with the animals. And in
this way, she can even tell you, you know, like
connecting with your guardian spirit, there's
things that you can do as mom. So with that,
it's really nice so that you can begin to, the
heart, once it's restored, and the head are meant
to work together. And that's what you're doing
is heal and integration, as we did in the beginning
of this reading. Things integrating together.
And then as you become stronger, you don't have
to be sucking in everybody's everything. You
can create. just like in your home you know you
try to create a place of sanctuary like here
and the difference between good and evil is that
here it's ambient but it's still your choice
whether to embrace this energy or not i don't
ever force it you know we're evil you know you're
seeing how it operates yeah it's like the drug
pusher yeah you know here have a hidden before
you know it yeah the good news is that unlike
a drug that can really alter your chemistry and
you can be screwed forever, you're not anywhere
near that. Yeah. Thank you. You're not anywhere
near that. Good. Right. So that's what I want
to say to you. And you know you're getting close
because suddenly you're going to feel the interference
from the emotions and guilt and visions and da
-da -da. It's like, okay, I'm going to consider
it to be backhand compliment. The fact that all
this interference is coming up means I'm right
on the mark. how i felt yep that's how i felt
the whole time yep i'm like i know who i am i
know where i come from i know my family is strong
i know we are good yes i know that there's credits
and debts and i'm probably worth a lot because
why would that happen i'm like that's okay i'm
strong being be feeling is not weakness that
takes strength 100 and doing the right thing
and protecting and showing love takes strength
that's not weakness correct and it's i'm like
this painful but that's okay because i'm strong
like it's like but going beyond that in native
way again joy of life the joy of living so i
know a lot in western they have this a lot i
know i guess this is a remarking there's a lot
of idea of punishment and pain a lot but again
pain It is only a passing aspect. There's a greater
joy. You know, a greater light, a greater warmth.
See what I'm saying to you? So growth is not
always pain. Think of what you're doing for your
child, right? You know, you try to make it warm
and happy. So there's that cultivation, that
nourishment. Begin seeking that for yourself.
Okay. Cultivating nourishment. And if you're
saying it because his mom's in his busy 21st
century, say, you know what? Would I treat someone
I love the way that I'm treating me? And the
answer is no. Okay. See where I'm driving to?
Then say, well, what would I change or what would
I say? Then begin to take your own good medicine.
See what I mean? And then there's love and support.
Yeah. It's funny. I don't know why I hold that.
It's like I tell myself I don't deserve that,
but I would give it to somebody that I don't
even know before I get it, you know? And that's
all. There's the heart of your personal healing
journey. But that's what this vampire latched
onto. They're very good at seeing somebody's
weak spot. So you just need to distill two things.
This is part of your journey uninterrupted. Your
nature is to be giving. Part of your soul is
learning to receive. And there's also discernment,
right? Now, as her mom's going to talk to this
one mom to another, because when we were kids
too, we thought that... We were grown up enough
to be able to earn the right to eat all of the
ice cream. Because, yeah, we'll eat dinner, right?
I just think, so here, when you're thinking you're
not worthy, that's an old wound. That's an old
wound. Examine where it comes from. But if you
weren't worthy, I want you to look at some heart
evidence. Would you have the good people who
are around you? Would you have doors opening
to you like they are? Do you see what I'm saying?
Look at the hard evidence. Life is a reflection.
Yeah. You see what I mean? Yeah. Say, well, where
did this guy come from? Well, part of it was
a past life, and he blew it. But because you
want to make sure that you and others whom you
love don't get hurt. This is the equivalent of
the rope wave getting street smarts. Yeah. That's
what happens. Spiritual street smarts. Spiritual
street smarts. That's what you got. Yeah. I thought
I made a mistake by not asking questions. When
I'm by myself, I don't say things out loud. I
used to. And then I was getting more. Things
would literally appear or songs would come on.
Those are messages. So then it was a little bit
much for me. So then I was like, I'm not going
to say anything out loud. I'm just going to sleep.
Like I'm just going to, I can't handle it. Messages
come anyway. Yeah. I felt like I didn't want
to manipulate anything. I felt like I was making
things happen and I was like, but I don't want
to. There's a difference. And then we're going
to close to the blessing because I want to make
sure that you go home and that I know Bev wants
to go home too. Okay. Let's put it this way.
The difference between interaction versus manipulation
is manipulation is against the will. Or against
always something where someone was meant to be
interacted with. Right? But there needs to be
interaction. So, but if that interaction is one
where everybody knows the boundaries, setting
of expectations, then so be it. You know? So
that's the difference. That's the difference.
You know, so if anything, another thing with
street smarts that you learned is, you know,
if you're not open, if you're, you know, to the
idea that you can be manipulated and having a
stronger interaction with your protectors, when
the language happens. So in Native style, Saipanaman
is a sharing, it's a culture that I know. is
say if, with the spirit of the animals, I say,
you know, I would like to ask for a prayer fan
to be able to help others. Is there any bird
out there who would like to offer to help me?
And so suddenly, this macaw, and the owner said,
or I'm saying the human companion said, by the
way, these are for you. Oh, my gosh. I don't
know why. I said, thank you. So I said, what
is your feather baby allowed to have? So I spoiled
that bird rotten. Oh. I said, thank you. Yeah.
So see what I'm saying? So there was an asking.
It's not taking. Correct. It's asking and then
receiving. That's the thing I have trouble with
is receiving. And you'll hear that. Is me asking?
I feel like I shouldn't be asking. Of course
you should. Of course you should. Let me tell
you what happens. I hope the world for everybody
else, but I don't want to ask. I don't know why
that is. Because of lessons you've had in this
lifetime and past lifetimes. But let me tell
you what happens when you don't. First of all,
you get weird crap like this, right? Not you're
going to have anything as bad as this again.
That much I do know. You're protected. But let's
do it in a microcosm. Imagine going into a restaurant
and your server goes, what would you like to
eat today? Welcome. And you go, I don't want
to ask for anything. You'll know the right thing
I want to eat. I have not. And the server goes,
uh, which is different than saying, you know
what? I'm in the mood for, um, you know, something
that's vegetarian. And what would you recommend?
Yeah. That's different than going and saying,
um, right. Yeah. yeah and then you get something
and you may or may not like it versus saying
this is what i'm asking for these are the parameters
of it yeah what you got yeah that's different
giving and receiving giving and receiving i need
to work on that giving and receiving so that's
why when you do this and if you have difficulty
i can help you but i firmly believe that you
are more than capable and I'm going to release
you from the Western mind because it's a pass
-fail mindset. Please stop. Yeah. You've been
through a lot. You're tired. So if you do this
and you feel like, I feel that I got it mostly,
but now you know the difference from walking
in and out of here. Yeah. Right. Then there's
nothing wrong with it. It's equated that, imagine
if somebody is sick and they make themselves
better, but they need that last antibiotic to
bump them into being. into being completely well.
Would you beat that person because they couldn't
magically create the antibiotics themselves?
No. Hello. So don't do that to yourself. Release
the judgment. Right? Say, you know what? I learned
a valuable lesson. I feel I can do this. And
if you do it most of the way, you know, but not
all of the way, say, you know what? I'm very
proud I was able to do this. But, you know, just
kind of like having an infection. I can strengthen
the body, but I might need like that spiritual
antibiotic to just kick it. Yeah. That's it.
Okay. That's it. That's all you have to do. Right.
And then like, so with your daughter, you know,
she's protected and this might be really nice
where she can learn from the very beginning that,
you know, these abilities is when I teach little
ones, it's like, I said, this is not like, you
know, like freak street. It's supernatural, which
means it's extremely natural. Yeah. All of our
ancestors around the world had this to some degree
so that we could survive and interact. It's only
in recent times with the wanting to control the
population that they cut the head from the heart.
Yeah. And try to have you be in the mind. Well,
what does the mind do? It operates on fear and
makes sure that you don't get eaten by a bear.
Defense the bear. But you get the idea. Yeah.
So now you're just reconnecting. That's it. love
it right thank you you're welcome notice that
you feel more like yourself you have nothing
to be afraid of so you know when you step outside
of there that that monkey will will creep on
your back but you know that this is a monkey
this is not king kong good yeah that's another
thing i was very afraid that it was like if i
did something wrong or whatever i was doing was
affecting the world because from just my perspective
Not saying like I control, not saying that, but
it's like, I'm perceiving this world. If I can
control what I perceive because I can control
my surroundings, I can make it a lovely place.
Like I was so happy. I was like, Oh, you can
just trust everyone and everyone is love. But
now you got, now you got spiritual street sports.
I, for whatever reason, really believe that.
Like, that's what I like felt. You know, if we
were truly in a state of balance and harmony,
that is correct. But we're here and that everybody
chooses to operate that way. Yeah. That's what
I knew before when I was normal head thinking,
just from like my growing up. But then I was
like, whoa, it's, I just felt like people could
see me like in a way that I didn't, I wasn't
aware. I wasn't aware that. of anything spiritual,
really. And then it was kind of just, and then
I didn't know what anything was. And I'm like,
well, who knows? It's all anything. It knows.
And just consider, you know, your senses have
become enhanced and that's when, so they're enhanced.
And then really that's when you said in your
head, you know, is this TMI? Yeah. Okay. Yeah.
But I do enjoy it. I just was very confused,
and I did feel at my core that that was wrong.
Right. But I still said yes to it. But that's
okay, because now... You've learned. Yeah. You've
learned, because, again, a predator knows that
you don't know exactly what you're saying yes
to. Yeah. Yeah. Consider that. Yeah. You thought
you knew what you were saying yesterday. And
that's the opposite of what I would ever want
for anyone. Correct. The opposite between good
and evil. You've got to have full disclosure.
Yeah. That's why, if you noticed here, that's
how good operates. I give you full disclosure,
and not only did I say full disclosure, I said
test it. Try to debunk it. Yeah. Rattle it around
respectfully. Rattle it around. Yeah. And come
to your own conclusions. Yeah. That's how it
operates. That's how it should be. Yeah. Okay.
So we're going to finish with a blessing as well,
if you can put your hands this way. Ahud is said,
and until we speak again, may the blessings of
clarity of mind, freedom of spirit, and strength
of the body be with you and those whom you love.
Thank you so much for coming to see me today.
Thank you. You're very, very welcome. And so
it is. What a beautiful way to articulate A complex,
multidimensional, multi -lifetime contract with
a flare of spite. That's the word. Spitefulness.
I can take it. That's why I'm here. It's what
I'm made for, baby. So I just really enjoyed
listening to this and it was very empowering
for me. I hope you're not thinking that I'm like
some cocky lady over here saying how much I love
myself and I'm proud of myself. But I really,
it's becoming more and more clear to me. This
is what I'm made for. This is why I'm here. I'm
built for this and more. So I'm excited to be
alive, actually. And I appreciate all of the
lessons that I've had throughout my lifetimes
to come to this conclusion and have the opportunity
to be here now to make a change for the positive.
And I hope you all feel the same every day. In
so many ways, you can make positive changes.
I have to cost money. It can be as simple as
your time or acknowledging someone in real time
instead of ignoring them, making those connections
and keeping an open mind. Thank you so much for
listening. And again, I hope you enjoyed this.
I would love to hear from you. I hope you enjoy.
whatever time of day it is, wherever you are,
all around the world. I see some listeners around
the world, unless it's VPNs. In any event, I
wanted to give a huge shout out to Jeremy Silva,
a .k .a. Steelo Free, who was our guest last
week. He offered his track, Lights and Shadows,
for the show. I asked if he had any music he'd
be willing to share. Because I'm kind of, you
know, I'm just starting. I don't know what I'm
doing. I'm finding different songs here and there.
I always like to include music. It's a huge part
of my life. And I really dig his music. You should
check him out. There are links in his show notes
to get to his Spotify. But from now on, you'll
be able to enjoy his track Lights and Shadows
in the intro and outro of the show. All right.
Take care. I'll see you next time. Bye. We'll
be right back. I had to find a way to be grateful
for them locked doors that you may close. When
doves cry, it's so painful, but the purple rain
is so graceful. Cause pressure may die. I'm fighting
battles, lost between the lights and the shadows.
Trying to shoot me down, I'm dodging all the
ammo. Left me hanging, I escape from the gallows.
Swim through the ether, blowing on a reefer.
Running like Rev when he rapped about Adidas.
It's like my flow is heaven sent. My energy can
shift the cards in your tarot deck. Life ain't
always what it seem. An alternate reality, I'm
living in a dream. I got the Stussy on the T
with the 501 gene. Peace. You know the rest.