Hey everybody, welcome to Roll for Heresy, a
Wrath and Glory actual play podcast set in the
Warhammer 40k universe. I'm Kevin the Game Master,
narrator and voice of the world. Together with
my three best friends, we will be playing an
original story set in the grim darkness of the
far future. Introducing the players, we have
Tim, the rules scholar and Raven's Guard aficionado,
always has a secret in the back of his pocket,
Walton. Warhammer lore expert and Black Templar
player. He knows that canon matters until he
writes a 400 page fanfic of our own game. There's
Cliff, the Warhammer newbie with a hopeful optimistic
outlook on the 40k universe. I'm sure we'll fix
that soon. And me, your GM. Chaos loving heretic
who provides bad accents and worse vocal continuity.
So thanks for tuning in. We appreciate your time
and we're glad you chose to listen. We're always
refining how we put the game together, sharpening
the pacing, tightening the edits, and making
the story clearer for you. We hope this show
helps you learn a little more about Wrath and
Glory, inspires your own tabletop session, and
offers a fun, inclusive place to enjoy Warhammer
40k storytelling. So, laugh with us, argue with
us, and grow with us as we venture deep into
the warp. Now grease your chainsword, refuel
your flamers, as we embark on this chaotic adventure
together. and Roll for Heresy. Chet Longbottom,
a rat -like sniper, a very short, very ornery
survivalist, and he is trying to not get 8. Hi,
I'm Tim, and I've been playing RPGs for about
18 years, and I've been into 40k lore for just
about as long. I'm playing Squigs the Scribe.
He's about 5 '5", with mid -length, unkept salt
and pepper hair, and a scruffy beard. He's been
shuffled around the Imperium for most of his
life as part of its endless tides of faceless
bureaucrats, and he's always trying to stay unnoticed
and out of trouble. The Crimson Meridian is a
low -lit cathedral of brass and glass. A battered
hollow screen dominates one wall, its feed jagged
and grainy as it relays the latest Drukari raid
on an Imperial resource caravan. Below the screen,
a polished table of dark obsidian holds maps
and projected terrain, orbital lanes, and supply
vectors in thin blue tracery. Through a broad
viewport, The void beyond glitters cold. Streaks
of distant light mark travel lanes picked clean
by raiders. Voices murmuring in the corridor
die when the raid footage resumes, and each officer
in the room leans inward. The hollow screen shows
Drukari warriors moving like shadows across the
scorched hull and wrecked cargo skiffs. Their
helmets tilt to the camera in deliberate, contemptuous
gestures. A blade flashes. A detonator is triggered.
and crates erupt in a geyser of flames and black
smoke. The raiders laugh, an ugly, high sound
that filters through the grainy speakers. They
brandish gutted containers of food, med supplies,
and guardsmen's heads like trophies. Lounging
deeply in their chair, rogue traitor Cassian
Volaris. Tall, lean, and impeccably tailored
in a coat of deep crimson trimmed with gold,
her unruly fiery hair is kept shoulder -length.
She wears a weathered navigational sigil hanging
at her throat while her left hand bears a ring
of office that seems to reflect light even in
the shadows. They make a spectacle of it, don't
they? Taunting our cameras like they're at a
masquerade makes the loss taste worse. She traces
the map where the supply lines thin to a pinprick
and vanishes. She sits up from her slouched position
and straightens her coat, her eyes narrow with
a dangerous mix of irritation and hunger. It's
abhorrent. These spectacles, Cassian, starve
my men." Standing with his gaze fixed to the
hollow screen, Lord Commander Arcturus Vale broad
-shouldered and squared off, a statue of a man.
His scarred face is unyielding, framed by cropped
gray hair and a chiseled jaw set in grim determination.
His uniform is utilitarian, except for an iron
pauldron, etched with the names of his lost companies.
Every convoy lost is another week my men go to
watch and wait. Food, rations, replacement parts,
these are not curiosities. They are bone and
breath. We patch morale with promises and men
with half rations do not march well." Leaning
with his hands firmly planted on the obsidian
table, Inquisitor Zell Cain, slender and sharp.
His dress adorned in bone and ebony covered in
symbols of the Ordo Xenos. His angular clean
shaven face is framed by white hair and set with
sharp pale gray eyes. A compact holster at his
hip holds interrogation tools and faint sigils
scar the inside of his forearm. His cold gaze
is piercing but clinical. You waste your words
on spectacles and logistics. Crush the Raiders.
hunt their lairs, break their chains of raids.
Resources follow from security, not from placation.
Let me take agents and a strike unit. Leave the
rest to me." Security is necessary, but not sufficient.
Resting upon his subphemeral augmentics, Magos
verdant Kull. emaciated beneath layered utility
robes of Martian red. They half -hide arrays
of grafted wiring and metallic plating. A crown
of mechadendrites coil from his shoulders with
every move accompanied by soft hiss of servos.
His face is dominated by ocular implants that
glow faintly and a vox caster crackling in binaeric.
He leans close to the hollow screen. fingers
ghosting over the feed until the projector folds
into a schematic of a small distant world. Yields
are higher than planetary average, and the root
stores galore density and fibrous tubers suitable
for long -term preservation. No root. Prime food
starch for the crusades? Tell me where I signed
the charter. She smiles. The idea of a new world
wets her appetite. We need stores, and I need
novelty. Strel gives both, I've voyaged for less.
If it gives rations quicker, then we should funnel
what we can spare. He folds his hands. My men
and I will not be bartered for the promise of
distant crops. But if Strahl shortens the march
to full rations, I'll support the allocation.
You would bet lives on root grown in shadows?
His gaze narrows on Verdict Co. Strahl is distant.
Deployment diverted will leave gaps for the Drukari
to exploit. I will not allow another root to
be bled because of the Magos' whim. It is not
whim. He produces a thin data plate, and projects
a cycle that cascades into numbers, graphs, and
climate curves. Two moons produce fortnital tidal
irrigation. The red sun's spectra induce a higher
carotenoid content. and the tubers biochemistry
permits fermentation into concentrated rations.
With additional supply brigades and a basic processing
mill, the harvest cycles could net a suitable
yield within two years. The native populace is
compliant. Low -level governance, simple settlements,
minimal industrial resistance. Development there
consumes fewer imperial assets per unit yield,
then attempts to rebuild raided lanes here. Simple
people are easier to bring into our fold than
compromised trade routes. She rubs her chin.
Grail offers opportunity and a chance to stamp
my house across the New World. I prefer the trouble
that pays. And I worry for the cost of blood.
He glances at the hollow screen, where a Drukhari
fighter removes the limbs of a guardsman and
tosses them at the camera. If Strahl can be raised
without stripping the front, I'll accept the
transfers, but my first obligation remains to
my command. Then secure the front first, and
I will coordinate strikes into Drukhari staging
grounds. If you divert resources to Strahl without
neutralizing the raiders, you will doom both
projects. He inclines his head once decisively.
Find me the coordinates of their last staging
point and I will send a purge. Both objectives
are compatible. He watches them as if they were
a chemical reaction. A small specialized contingent
can oversee Strahl's initial cultivations. A
separate escort led by Inquisitor Zell. will
secure the route to the nearest orbital parcel.
The rest of the convoy capacity should be reallocated
to a forward strike group that I can help provision
algorithmically. Strahl's early planting will
demand seed stock and minimal processing hardware.
The returns are exponential. There is one significant
obstacle I have not emphasized. Straw is not
all open plain and obedient hamlet. A vast primordial
jungle occupies nearly one -third of the habitable
hemisphere. Its canopy is multilayered, hydrodynamically
dense, and biologically aggressive. Native flora
exhibits rapid clonogenic growth and synaptic
mimicry in certain finds. Until that jungle is
surveyed, and brought under management. Full
planetary control and uninterrupted yields are
impossible. A jungle? Sounds romantic. I mean,
until it eats you. She grins, but the grin tightens.
Taming a jungle is expensive. And dramatic. Exactly
my kind of venture if the profit margin survives
the bite. Taming or clearing. Either way, men
will die. He clenches his jaw. Those ecosystems
hide ambushes, disease vectors, and terrain that
will break formations. Escorting a convoy through
that green will require scouting parties, path
clearers, and long -term garrisoning. I will
not commit my battalions to be swallowed by flora.
Jungles make for perfect sanctuaries for the
depraved and the strange. His eyes narrow. If
Jukari or worse hide there, then Strahl becomes
another thorn. Send reconnaissance and targeted
purge teams. Let the jungle be catalogued and
stripped of its strategic cover before any large
-scale settlement or processing infrastructure
is established. He taps the overlay and a series
of mitigation options unfurl. Controlled corridors,
inoculation points, enzymatic suppressors, and
arboreal engineering nodes. We can establish
managed corridors that channel water and growth
cycles into productive margins. Deploy a modest
research and containment detachment first. Xenobotanists,
a handful of servitors with catalytic burners.
and engineers to implant microclimate regulators.
With careful intervention, we will convert only
the buffer zones necessary for planting and processing,
preserving the rest for ecological stability
and long -term resource harvest. Microclimate
regulators and catalytic burners sound expensive
and dramatic. She leans back, already imagining
contracts and showmen. Microclimate regulators
are not. This needs manpower and time." He looks
at Cole. If you require specialist attachments,
they come under my command or not at all. I could
spare a corvette and a few barges. I will send
adventurers and fighters. They will make a name
for themselves, bring back food and stories,
maybe new alliances. She glances at Arcturus
with a reckless grin. They will operate as a
joint task cadre under custodial oversight. Minimal
troops, maximum technological leverage. The jungle
can be coerced into servitude rather than raised.
That preserves labor, curbs ecological backlash,
and accelerates yield cycles. Coerced jungles
breed resentment and opportunists. I will oversee
any purge operations, and approve borders for
containment." His eyes flicked to the two moons
on the render. I will also audit any operation
I choose. Noted. He tilts his head to Inquisitor
Zell. Zell, if you can promise me a credible
strategy, I will earmark our last battalion's
worth of escorts for Cassian's convoy. I do not
promise. I act. Send the strike teams. I will
choose the method. Promptly, then. He smooths
his robes, and for an instant, his optics flare
with a faint, unreadable light. Strahl will not
require our full retinue if initial stages succeed.
I shall provide detailed field schematics for
immediate deployment. Central Command will be
like the prospect of a new agricultural node.
They will be quicker to supplement once they
see potential. That's agreed. A multi -pronged
approach. Adventure for me, assurance for Arcturus,
decisive blows for Zell, and scientific victory
for Call. She raises a glass of stale brandy
in a gesture, half jest, half pledge. To the
Crimson Meridian's next profitable gamble. For
the Emperor. He accepts the toast with a grim
nod. Zell raises his blade. To the purge. In
accordance with the Omnissiah's divine calculations.
Kull raises a writhing crown of mechadendrites
towards the vaulted ceiling. Servos whining and
lenses focusing as he bends his head in a slow,
formal homage to the Omnissiah. When he straightens,
his ocular implants meet Inquisitor Zell's gaze.
Zell catches the faintest. almost imperceptible
glimmer beneath Kull's usual cold, calculating
visage. Suspicion that the Magos had run the
numbers and quietly concealed a variable of his
own. Verdant Kull's proposal creates a new, immediate
requirement. A small, highly technical insertion
team to map and begin controlled taming of Stryle's
jungle. before mass resource allocations. A small
portion of freight and one corvette will be sent
to Strahl, escorted by a light battalion drawn
from Vale's command. An inquisitorial strike
will be mounted against the Drukhari. Cassian
will fund and charter contracts and fighters
to seed Strahl's initial plantations. The room
exhales and the projector stutters. The recorded
laughter of the Jukari warps into a thin line
of static as the hollow screen dims. A new set
of operational markers rise in its place. Stral.
You all find yourself in the Stral system on
the planet Stral, a backwater agriworld that
has just been discovered. by the Imperium and
the Mechanicus. They thoroughly enjoy the Strahl
Root that you have been producing for many moons.
This is a boon and a curse, as they've given
you much new technology to increase production,
but they demand increased production. Sent to
develop the world further are the Katakan Jungle
Fighters. They will map out and destroy all that
stands in the way of further progress. Here on
the planet, others have joined the guardsmen
and decided to increase their standing amongst
the crowd. Others, even so, have a history of
doing political paperwork and continue to do
so. So, let's start with Chet. Yes, that's me.
You are in the barracks and it is a closed barracks.
The... You are, you know, you're a criminal.
You were shipped here from far away Birmingham.
You are very unfamiliar with the area and you're
always looking over your shoulder. Oh, chat.
Hey, come over here. All right, so calm down.
I'm coming. You know, I got small legs, so it
takes me a little bit longer to get places. I
swear to God, if you use that excuse every time
you walk. We're gonna grow any bigger Ain't none
of us figured you ever would listen We got a
new assignment for you, you know You guys you
pushed you pushed as far west as you can go The
big the big bosses they want you to start going
east eastbound, but they want to start shipping
in new equipment And you know out there. It's
all trees So we're gonna have to have you get
some other people and we're gonna have to make
a good place to land Some landing area. I don't
know listen. I know there's some some Guardsmen
that know how to fly. Maybe they can help you
go go to the other mess hall and try to suss
them out So I can just go over there. I don't
have to have an escort or nothing because every
time I try to go to the bathroom one of you big
Jamux tried Watch me pee and I'm not really I'm
not really down for that. So if I can walk over
there by myself, I have no problem Listen you
know that I was implying you'd get an escort.
Well, I need to hear you say it Listen take tenor
Tenor is gonna take you actually and he's gonna
take you to the mess hall and then you both are
gonna go looking for the guardsman who knows
what the hell he's doing with planes, all right?
I don't care who it is, just find somebody. All
right. Well, you're sticking me with Tenor, who's
probably one of the most perverted of the bunch,
but I ain't got much choice in it. Listen, this
is just a way for me to get Tenor out of the
building, so anything to help me and torture
you, I'm good with it. You know what? You're
a hard man to deal with. Yeah, well, at least
there's not a lot of you to deal with. Well,
that's just not nice what you just said. I gotta
tell you, Chet, it's a harsh world out there.
I don't know if you realize this. You know what?
Someone go get Tanner. Tanner, you some bitch?
Tanner, get your ass in here. Uh, hey, uh, we
ready to go to the mess hall? Well, we gotta
go to the mess hall and... It's not going to
be very exciting for you, I'm guessing, because
you're not going to be able to watch repeat.
But let's get on over there. You always take
such a long time. I'm curious what you're doing
in there. You know what, Tenor? I don't need
your lip. OK, Chet, whatever you say. Let's get
a mosey on. All right. This way. Maybe if we
get there on time, you know, a little early or
something, they might have some food that is
not. made out of people. Alright, you do that.
I'll look the other way if you grab something
for us both. Alright, don't get too excited.
Let's go. Alright, follow me, Chet. Alright,
you exit the closed barrack with your escort
in hand and you see a bustling military operation.
Your section is kind of like a pop -up building.
It was clearly not there for very long. It looks
very out of place. Much of the original architecture
is made of traditional wood and stone. All the
newer military pop -up bases are metal and tent
material. for quick assembly and disassembly
so there's this contrast between like new age
technology and like older modern building technology
as the planet becomes more developed so they
take you tenor takes you and he begins to lead
you towards the mess hall and you arrive and
the mess hall is You know, there's there's not
a lot of recruits for the guardsmen it's it's
mainly offworlders that have been pushing into
the the jungles and only There hasn't really
been a need for conscription. So only real volunteers
have have begun to show up show up for this kind
of activity so you enter and there's a handful
maybe a dozen people eating and right away one
person stands out and that'll be Francisco. Yeah
Francisco definitely stands out as you can see
even while he's eating his meal here. He is dressed
full pirate pilot garb he's got the cap on he's
got the little bomber jacket he is he looks like
he is like ready to hop into a cockpit at a moment's
notice. He's also sitting alone just sort of
poking at his food and like every time he takes
a bite of it he just sort of makes a face of
disgust. Alright Chet, find out which one of
these can do what the commander said. Alright,
I'll be here at the door. Alright, alright, I
just don't don't yeah you stand by the door don't
don't cramp my style this is a very sensitive
area we're gonna get into where I'm negotiating
with the strangers I've never met before. And
I don't need some big jmoke just standing over
my shoulder. I know how sensitive you are Chet,
don't worry. Dammit Tenet, alright you just go
stand by the door. He gives you a big wink. And
Chet's probably you know still in his prisoner
uniform that's not tailored at all so it looks
like you put a set of mechanics overalls on a
10 year old and he just kind of scans the room
and he sees Francis go and he kind of his eyes
kind of gleam a little bit and he kind of waddles
over there he's probably still wearing like ankle
irons not you know kind of shackled up so he
can't run but it just kind of waddles over there
towards him hey you uh you you look like you
uh fly fly ships you do that Fly yes, I fly I
definitely fly hello Yes, and you see him like
stand up from the table and immediately like
spill his tray and knock over his drink And he's
just like sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry. Can we get
other towels? I don't I don't All right calm
down calm. Oh, yes. Hello So first of all, I
didn't introduce myself. That's awfully rude
to me My name is Chet long bottom of the Birmingham
long bottoms. You've probably heard of us so
I'm in a bit of a pickle uh I was told by let's
say uh overseers of my current predicament and
he's clearly like motioning towards his uniform.
I uh I've been going west for a bit clearing
out the jungles and scouting and now they want
me to go all the way east and not only go all
the ways they want me to carry a bunch of gear
and crap for Stuff that I it's not in my business
really. I don't have any mind to what they're
doing I just do what I'm told because I have
to and I was looking to see if someone could
fly that stuff over there So I didn't have to
lug it all the way there by myself. Is that something
you think you might be able to do? you see that
as Francisco stands up to his full height he's
about he's about five seven or so five eight
maybe so you know taller than you but most people
are he he looks at your chains and he seems visibly
confused by the situation but he puts it aside
it just says yes hi I'm Francisco he puts out
his hand to shake yours Francisco Francisco torrent
I'd be happy to fly you out east. Well, Francisco,
it's nice to meet you. You know, if I don't shake
your hands, I apologize, you know, with the chains
and everything. But if you can do that for us,
that'd be a real solid because if they want me
to lug all this crap all the way back east, it's
going to take, I don't know, a couple of months
and then I'll probably get killed or eight or
something while I'm doing. Oh, I will definitely
do my best to make sure you do not get killed
or eight. uh the chains seem like they would
make things difficult i don't want to be rude
or presumptuous but uh what's what's up with
the chains what's the deal with the chains what's
uh what's going on with the chains no no no these
are just a good question so i i did some stuff
and things that i'm not going to really get into
and uh as part of doing that i am now what you
might consider a prisoner quote unquote prisoner
so they they ship me out And said, hey, you're
going to fight with them jungle fighters. And
I said, OK, well, I don't have a choice there,
boss. So that's why I'm here now. Oh, I didn't
know. I didn't know that was the thing the Imperium
did. So so you're you were criminal, but now
you're. No, no, I'm still criminal. Oh, OK. Oh,
all right. Let's I who am I to judge? We've all
done something. Not horrible terrible, but things
right right? Well, yeah, we've all done stuff,
but you know not all of us are currently serving
Punishment for said things that may or may not
have occurred and I will not incriminate myself
by saying anything further on that matter right
Yes, and you see him Francisco like we get you,
but then realize like he has no idea what he's
doing But he's like so yes, I can fly Where should
I? go to do that are you ready to go now we could
head out uh well yeah i still gotta find i think
a couple more people uh tenant that big weird
guy over there in the corner he's he's my escort
uh so i'm assuming once i find all the the requisite
people for this uh job here that tenant will
bring his weird self back over here and take
us uh whoever's gonna issue out our our gear
and give me my rifle back They don't let me have
my rifle because last time they gave me my rifle
I shot someone and you think that would be fine
But apparently you can only shoot people when
they tell you it's okay, which seems a little
bit restricted if you ask me Yeah, I mean for
the military it would make the most sense to
shoot people also hi tenor and he waves a tenor
and then he whispers down to you like he leans
low because you're shorter and he's just like
tenor tenor is weird right like every time we're
in the urinal together he keeps like Shifting
his eyes towards me. I don't understand why.
That is what I've been saying this whole time.
Okay, all right, not just me then, not just me.
Goddamn. Sorry, Kevin. No, do it. I love it.
Then yeah, I'm good to go. Let me just get some
towels to mop this up, but I'll follow you and
Tenor to the rest of the repositioning. All right,
well, I'm not going anywhere, you know, on account
of the chains. I can't. Right, those will come
off for the mission, I assume. Ah, they usually
do. One time they didn't take my leg irons off,
and then they asked me, why'd it take you three
weeks to get to this checkpoint? I was like,
well, you left my damn leg irons on, stupid.
Right, that could definitely cause problems.
Am I? So Tenor, you know what, I'll save that
question for later. But yeah, I'm ready to go
whenever you are. All right. So we look around,
see if there's anybody else interesting in the
mess hall. Uh, you don't see anyone else of note.
Uh, you feel that, you know, you found the one
person you - you came to see, so, uh, Tenor kinda
is watching you talk for a while, and then he
- he walks over. Ahem. Hey, have ya? Oh, I see.
How ya doin', Francisco? Long time no see. Great!
Let me take you back to - Staff Sergeant Boussaint.
He'll fill you in. Come on, Chet. Let's go back.
Alright, Kenny. I told you to stop being weird.
You don't gotta... Alright, just go. We'll follow
you. You guys are... You guys are so mean. I'm
not weird. And you see he's like pushing bits
of food into his pockets that he's clearly stolen.
Chet looks at Francisco, it's like, this is why
I don't talk to, I don't talk to Pinnit, if I
can avoid it. Yeah, if we could just avoid Tanner
for the rest of it, but Sergeant Busan sounds
great, I'm very excited. Okay, come on. Back
to base. Er, not base, we're at base. Back to
the office. Okay, so as you exit, you know, the
streets are a hustle and bustle, you see various
planes and... flying overhead as you know They're
their delivery planes. So they're gonna have
you know, different kinds of shipping containers
that they're carrying to various places So it's
kind of noisy as you walk outside You know this
nice agri world that you're on the air is was
very fresh but it's beginning to smell a little
bit like used fuel as development and infrastructure
begins to dominate this area. Yeah, uh, Francisco,
you'd probably see, like, if you're walking,
you'd probably notice that if you're looking
at Chet, he's actively fiddling with his leg
irons and his arm irons while he's walking. Like,
he's eyeing chances to break out. Alright. Sorry
that those things are so itchy, Chet. You'll
get them off soon enough. I'm just saying, Tenet,
if we're real buddies, you just take this off
for me right now and I can just walk like a normal
Rattling Man. Uh, you know I can't do that, Chet.
If you want, I could carry you, though. No, you
are not going to carry me, Tenet. You look like
you're fun to carry. That is offensive, and I
will not be carried by some strange jemoke like
you, Tenet. We do not have that kind of relationship.
Well, the offer is always on the table. You leave
that offer on the table, it ain't going nowhere.
Alright, go in and talk to Sergeant Busan. He'll
fill you in for the rest of it. You know, that
check kinda waddles in. Where's the sergeant
at? I brought this guy, I brought Francisco here.
He's gonna fly us all this gear. Ah, you're here.
You see a man turn. Turn the corner. He's holding
a clipboard with multiple frazzled pages, you
know barely hanging on in the clip The pen once
attached to the clipboard by like a string clearly
has broken and he's like trying to like write
with it But it's like out of ink and he's like
jamming it in there and he looks up. He's like,
oh You two must be here for the new Eastern job.
Yeah Sergeant Pizan guardsman Francisco torrent
reporting for duty and I stand at attention and
salute him Oh, good. He gives you a salute back.
At ease. At ease, Guardsman. Yes, the one in
irons. Yeah, you keep being relaxed too. Alright,
so I assume you've heard the new advancements
out to the east. We need a team to survey the
area and find a good landing zone. It seems that
Francisco, you've got some training as a pilot,
so you know a good place to land. So you're gonna
have to lead this little team to scout the area.
Yes, sir. Absolutely, sir. Looks like this catacan
jungle fighter, Chet. Yeah, you'll be there.
You watch out. This one, make sure he doesn't
run away. Now why would I go do something like
that? Why would I yearn for freedom? Listen,
son, we'll all be free soon enough. I don't like
the way you phrased that, but okay. You have
nothing to worry about, sir. What rank would
I call Chet? When I say private long bottom is...
I will look after Private Longbottom. What lore
rank would I use to call Chet Longbottom? I don't
know the hierarchy of a penal jungle fighter.
Yeah, I guess Private would be acceptable. All
right, I would be like then yeah, uh, you have
nothing to worry about Sarge was on a private
long bottom is will be looked after and The mission
will be carried out without a hitch. I'm very
certain I can I can I can fly any ship anywhere.
I can thread that needle I can land in the jungle.
I've got plenty of experience. I'm gonna I'm
gonna stop now Good no son, that's good. We like
your enthusiasm, but there ain't no flying here
You're just gonna be scouting for a landing zone.
You know that, right? Oh. Oh, right. Yeah, that's...
No, well, definitely. Yeah, definitely. We'll
scout for the landing zone. I'll... Yes, that
makes sense. And he looks very disappointed,
but doesn't say anything else. Anyway, so, one
more thing. You're gonna need somebody who's
good with maps. A cartographer, I think they're
called. Go to the mutatorium. Find somebody there
who looks bored. Let me I'll tell you they all
look bored and You're gonna need someone to come
with you that that'll be able to record your
your position out there and Record a good Topographical
location so we understand where we're actually
flying to that makes sense every time y 'all
send me I just point me in a random direction
and tell me to start walking we're getting the
map guy now Well, yeah, because, you know, the
last time we sent you out walking, you almost
walked off a cliff. So this time we're gonna
try a little harder. Alright, well, I guess we'll
go over to, uh, the Munatorium. See if we can,
uh, scrounge up there, eh, friend? Just go...
Does Tenet have to keep coming with me? I mean,
we're obviously doing something important. If
you got my irons on, I don't see why you need
this big weirdo following us around. Uh, no.
Tenor can go back to the barracks. Francisco,
you're in charge of watching Chet now. Off you
go. I've got stuff to do. And he continues to
scribble. Why won't this fucking pen work? God
damn it. Understood, sir. I will look after Private
Longbottom and I will find us a cartographer
at the Munitorre. He sits down in his chair.
Fantastic. Now, move along. Fuck! He rips out
a page, crumples it up and throws it on the ground.
Continues to write. And I sort of, like, just
start to leave, but I hold the door open for
Chet. Oh, well, I appreciate that. It's very
nice of you. And he kind of shuffles, duck walks
his way through the door. Tenor looks over and
goes, Oh, are you two ready? Tenor, you've been
relieved of your... If you're watching over me
duties, you can go back to the barracks and being
a weirdo friend. Sarge, what's your rank there,
Francis? That's a great question. I assume I'm
still private. It's very early in my thing, I
assume. Yeah. Yeah. Private. Private torrent.
My fellow private non -prisoner guy is going
to escort me to the mutatorium and we're going
to try and find another guy to fill out this
outfit. Alright, if that's the order, here Francisco,
you'll need this. And he rumbles in his pockets,
and he pulls out a key that's covered in food,
and he hands it to you. I take it, and I don't
see anything. Chat ties get super wide. Does
he see the keys? Yeah, that's the key to your
shackles. Okay, alright. Oh, oh, I did it. If
you look under my bunk, I left a corpse starch
cookie under there. Oh, that's very kind of you.
I didn't say you could eat it. I'm just letting
you know it's there. Oh, I get it. Wink, wink.
I'll see you later, Chet. Damn, he's gonna eat
that kagashin that told him nothing about it.
You should have kept the cookie quiet. He is
eating that cookie. He's gonna eat that cookie.
Damn it. He continues to lumber. He starts to
eat the food that's in his pockets and he's like
licks his fingers and like the food is covered
in lint And then he walks away. I almost rather
eat it now because his hands are all nasty. No
Whatever let's get out of here. Let's get out
of here. I wiped the key down Somewhere and then
I just exit out. Yeah, we can go to the you know,
the mutatory you called it I Believe that's unmuted
Mutatorium is that correct him? Yeah, the mutatorium
or like the administratum Whatever pig land you
want to use mutatorium does all their bullets
of bullshit It's the reason nobody has okay reason
nobody has any bullets because they're busy counting
them all the time Right. So the mutatorium is
for munitions. Mm -hmm, and we can just whatever
it's fine You can just go to the mutatorium where
alone you're on loan. Yeah Okay So you venture
off to the mutatorium This moderately sized building
you can smell the gunpowder and you can you can
like feel the air is Kind of weird over here
as it's just stacks upon stacks of ammunition
And it's like floor to ceiling There's a bunch
of people walking around holding scrolls of various
lengths and they're recording stuff. They're
in like a hustle and bustle and nobody's paying
attention to you. Tim, where would you like to
be? Squigs, where are you in this area? Squigs
would probably be sitting on a crate of munitions
of some sort with another crate in front of him
just going through sheets and sheets of paper.
basically just doing accounting this here okay
this checks this checks it's like cross -checking
things you see there is just a stacks upon stacks
of paperwork all around him kind of in a corner
of a warehouse probably what's actually verify
occasionally what's there and just engrossed
with looking over charts I'm like this The handwriting
doesn't even fucking matter. Okay, no, okay.
All right, that's good. Just sheafing through
paperwork. All right, so you see all of this
when you arrive and as soon as you walk in a
floating servo skull comes and addresses you.
Good day. How may the mutatorium be of assistance?
Private. Yes, this is Private Torrent. I'm looking
for a cartographer on behalf of Sergeant Busan's
latest request. Sergeant Busan, requisition accepted.
Follow me. And the server skull begins to float.
And as it floats, first it takes you to a young
man. who's got a scroll and he's furvishly writing
stuff down. He goes, mm, not available, continuing.
And next he takes you down the line and this
continues for a little while as it starts scanning
each different person there until it stops at
a middle -aged man in his forties sitting on
a crate as described previously. And he goes,
mm, this one is on loan. and may be relinquished.
Thank you, thank you. Hello, sir. I am Private
Francisco Torrent. Sergeant Busan has asked that
we find a cartographer. We're scouting a landing
zone out east. Could we... I don't know what
you're doing right now, but can we pull you away
from it? He looks up and just kind of sighs a
little bit, looks at the skull. with like, uh,
like, fine, this is, this is how it is, uh, and
stands up and is like, dusts himself off, files
his paperwork, uh, very A -type personality,
making sure everything's nice and clean and set
up, um, and then once his stuff is all squared
away, he finally turns to look at you, look at
both of you, um, and, uh, goes, I guess, yes,
alright. So, it looks back towards the skull,
I am relinquished? Yes. Squigs, Sage, Squigs
is now being reassigned to the scouting quest
out east. Fuck, okay. Private, is that all you
are here for? Uh, yes, that's all. Please leave
the mutatorium now that your business has concluded.
Alright, well... Come with me, I'll show you
out before this thing gets angry. Thanks. Squigs,
was it? Yes. Squigs. Squigs will do. Hi, Squigs.
I'm Francisco Torrent. This here is Chet Longbottom.
Squigs. Squigs puts a hand out very perfunctorily
to shake each of your hands. They shake back.
You can see, like... It's stained with ink and
he's got, like, paper cuts and his skin's kind
of almost prematurely leather. Haven't heard
of the Long Bottoms, though. I don't think there
are many of your... people? Here? Well, there's
only like 13 of us right now. There was 15 before
I entered my situation, but... Two of them got
smashed by a tank. Yep. Yep, the tracks. Yeah,
that's what ran them over, was the tracks. Oh,
well. Sorry for your loss. It's fine, it happens.
You mess with tanks, eventually one of them is
going to run you over. That's what my dad always
says. Oddly, my mother said the same thing. Yeah,
they taught us that in school. You mess with
tanks, eventually they're going to run you over.
Well, um, very well, let's... So, what are we
doing? What's the plan? Out east, they need a
new landing zone as they're starting to expand
in that direction, so I guess we're just scouting
it out. I don't know what other provisions if
we're gonna take a vehicle there. They said I'm
not allowed to fly out there, not yet, but we
should go find a place so that we have a landing
zone so we can fly there further in the future.
Oh. Okay. All right, yep. Yep. This is what I
wanted to do today Sure, let's go Sorry, they
said you're on loan. What does that mean exactly
if it's not too personal to ask the Munitorum
sent out plenty of the gestures towards our small
catachan fighter said sent out plenty of soldiers
ammunition and equipment and not enough quartermasters
to keep track of them and they requested very
nicely that some of our local sages and scroll
workers be assigned to them and as part of this
amenable deal I was taken off of my counting
and accounting tasks for our Various routes and
other such exports and assigned to count last
packs all the last packs every oh Okay But that's
okay last packs don't go anywhere or get used
often so it's a very easy job where no one bothers
the last packs so let's The farther the way from
the building we are I think the better I will
feel Agreed yeah, we can head out then because
I think we've got what we need Good good I What
do you need me for my counting trees steps? You're
a map guy oh Okay Very well you can you do maps
is that it's that a thing that you uh that you're
good at I can do maps I can make maps go I think
Sarge Busan mentioned topography. He wants the
topography of the area. You have to forgive me,
I'm not quite sure on cartography, terminology,
but does that all make sense to you? Yes. I think
I'll be able to manage that. Routes and maps
are just a different type of accounting. So,
yeah. Okay. It's been a while since I've seen
sunlight. Let's let's This this is new. Let's
let's let's go. Let's go farther away from the
building the better and He pulls a satchel and
he's got papers and a clipboard And several records
Plus his auto quill So he's uh He's just kind
of like walking behind you Unsure exactly like
he looks kind of unsure of exactly what he's
supposed to do with just like a pen and his Clipboard
yeah, your name is you said squigs. That's your
name squigs, right? Yes Squigs is my name. I'm
not trying to be insulting but uh What exactly
are you going to do? Do you have like a weapon
or? Anything of the nature to defend yourself?
Other than your clipboard and quill, which while
deadly looking, will probably not offer you much
protection in the wilds. The power of paperwork
conquers all. And if that doesn't work, I have
a las pistol. Okay, there we go. We're good.
Alright. I, um... Yes, it was, um... It was left
behind. This las pistol. Bureaucratic oversight,
as it were. Well, I'm sure you counted all the
laspacks, so, you know. I did count all the laspacks.
I'm not in charge of counting the las pistols.
Perfect for us, then. Thank you for listening
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