Speaker: Welcome to tongue first, the
Speaker: queer curiosity podcast with a
Speaker: bite.
Speaker: In this debut episode, Siren and Wendy bear it all.
Speaker: Who they are, how they met, and what happens when two Geminis
Speaker: with matching tattoos and filthy minds start a show together.
Speaker: They talk trans awakenings, lesbian stereotypes, love, loss
Speaker: and lube, all with laughter, honesty and just the right
Speaker: amount of chaos.
Speaker: So grab your coffee, your cooter, or both, and get ready
Speaker: to get moist.
Speaker: Because on tongue, first,
Speaker: curiosity is sexy and consent is
Speaker: hotter.
Siren: I feel like there'd be intro music.
Wendy: Can we have, like, Meg the Stallion?
Siren: Yeah, for sure.
Wendy: Or some shit like that.
Siren: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wendy: some ratchet ass hoe How can we get that.
Siren: some ratchet ass hoe shit?
Siren: So input ratchet ass shit right
Wendy: And put it right there.
Siren: welcome in everybody.
Siren: Hey, babies.
Siren: Hey, Fram.
Siren: What's up?
Siren: Baz?
Siren: Um, this is.
Wendy: The.
Siren: The Fram. Baz. This is the first episode of Wendy and I's new
Siren: podcast called tongue first tongue, first tongue first.
Siren: Because if you're gonna do anything, you might as well put
Siren: your whole mouth on it.
Wendy: Mouth on.
Wendy: Oh, I'm just kidding.
Siren: Oh, my gosh. So, Wendy, I love the byline you came up with.
Siren: A queer curiosity podcast with bite.
Wendy: Yes, a queer curiosity.
Siren: Awesome.
Wendy: Because we are.
Wendy: We are queer.
Wendy: Read the sticker.
Siren: I love the sticker.
Siren: It's so pretty.
Siren: All of these people in podcast land that can't see the sticker
Siren: are really missing out.
Wendy: Yeah, we'll have to.
Wendy: describe it to you.
Wendy: It's too sexy ass motherfuckers.
Wendy: Just existing, That's all you need to know.
Siren: Do you know what, Wendy?
Siren: Maybe we should start there.
Siren: Maybe we should introduce ourselves
Wendy: Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Wendy: The sticker is going to make
Wendy: your cooter tingle is just what
Wendy: I'm saying.
Wendy: Okay, so if you know, if you know, you know.
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy: Ladies first siren.
Wendy: You're up, baby,
Siren: Okay. All right.
Siren: So, Hello, my friends in podcast lands.
Siren: I usually say chat, and I'm probably gonna say chat a lot
Siren: because, Wendy and I are both live streamers and content
Siren: creators on TikTok.
Siren: That's how I kind of got my start here.
Siren: That's why we're doing the whole podcast in the first place.
Siren: I am a thirty seven year old queer trans woman.
Siren: My pronouns are she her.
Siren: I am the mom of two amazing children.
Siren: I identify as a lesbian.
Siren: I play roller derby, I was a youth pastor for eleven years.
Siren: And I was thirty three years old when I started to come to terms
Siren: with who I was.
Siren: But what about you, baby?
Siren: Introduce yourself.
Siren: Wendy.
Wendy: All right.
Wendy: Who the fuck are we?
Wendy: Who the fuck am I?
Wendy: My name is.
Wendy: Wendy, aka, uh.
Wendy: Whatever.
Wendy: I didn't have an aka.
Wendy: I don't know why I said that.
Wendy: I digress, I am a seasoned forty
Wendy: four year old cis woman lesbian
Wendy: lesbian?
Wendy: I hate when fucking lesbians say that.
Siren: Why did you say it?
Wendy: I don't know, so dumb.
Wendy: I am a big advocate of mental
Wendy: health and sexual assault
Wendy: awareness, as well as a
Wendy: motherfucking Gemini.
Wendy: And oh, look, that's that's the kicker.
Wendy: Siren and I both have the same birthday.
Siren: We do, we do.
Wendy: June eighteenth. June eighteenth.
Wendy: We're Geminis.
Siren: I wish it didn't freak me out as much as it does.
Siren: It just it's it freaks me out.
Siren: Wendy.
Siren: It does.
Siren: It freaks me out.
Siren: It's wild.
Wendy: it's nothing to me because I have a twin.
Wendy: So now I get to just share my birthday with more you fuckers.
Wendy: Why can't I just have my own fucking day?
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy: I say fuck a lot if you don't like it, I don't fucking care.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: You know what a bad word is?
Siren: Where does it hurt people if you ask me?
Siren: You tell me.
Wendy: What a bad word is for most people.
Wendy: Moist.
Siren: Yeah. Yeah.
Wendy: Less people would rather hear that than fuckity.
Wendy: Fuck fuck fuck.
Siren: That's. That's so true.
Siren: I will say that, if you are part
Siren: of this podcast for long, you
Siren: should probably expect to get
Siren: rather moist.
Wendy: Yes.
Siren: Yeah. I mean, it could get rather moist.
Siren: Wherever you are.
Wendy: Your panty.
Wendy: Your your pantaloons will be.
Wendy: Condensated.
Wendy: Anyways, not only do I share a
Wendy: birthday with my twin who I'm a
Wendy: fraternal twin.
Wendy: I also share it with siren, which we met through TikTok.
Wendy: We're vibing and thriving.
Wendy: It was love at first sight.
Wendy: if you tell siren that they are a good girl, she will just melt.
Siren: This is true.
Siren: This is.
Wendy: True. She'll hide in the side chat.
Wendy: I have a fifteen year old dachshund.
Wendy: That's my son, I birthed him, I pushed him out of my cooter cat.
Wendy: You can't tell me any different.
Siren: one of the things that drew me to you and one of the things
Siren: that got us together because I think that's that's one of the
Siren: people's big questions, right?
Siren: Is like, what brought us together?
Siren: and I think this idea, well, there's a lot of things that
Siren: brought us together.
Siren: I think I probably spotted you
Siren: before you spotted me the first
Siren: time.
Siren: Um, you.
Wendy: Peeping me out, you creeper.
Wendy: I love it.
Siren: Just a little bit.
Siren: I was stalking.
Siren: You know, we both have a very
Siren: similar live, a very similar
Siren: vibe when it comes to our
Siren: morning thing.
Siren: And you often started earlier than me.
Siren: So when I'm getting ready with
Siren: my makeup and things like that,
Siren: I would always swipe through
Siren: TikTok.
Siren: And one of the first people I come across was you, and you
Siren: were always sitting there like chatting with people over your
Siren: coffee and I'm like, damn, like, okay, like this is like if.
Wendy: Damn.
Siren: Like that.
Siren: But like in a way, in a way, if
Siren: I'm gonna be honest like this,
Siren: this, this.
Siren: I'm not sure if this is gonna gas you up or how this is gonna
Siren: make you feel, but, like.
Wendy: Gas me.
Siren: Up, but, like, I was like, damn.
Siren: Like, if I was.
Siren: If I was born.
Siren: Sis, this this was probably potentially where I might be at.
Siren: You know what I mean?
Siren: Like, this is the vibe.
Siren: This is the energy that I would be living into.
Siren: and it just kind of drew me in with that, I think with our
Siren: energy and our matching style.
Siren: I didn't even know what at that
Siren: point, that we had the same
Siren: birthday.
Siren: You know what I mean?
Wendy: Like, no, I didn't even know that we were gonna vibe out as
Wendy: much as we did.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: And we have the same tattoo on our finger.
Siren: We do?
Siren: That's freaking crazy.
Siren: You guys can't see this in the podcast land.
Siren: But in the TikToks, we have the same facing the same direction
Siren: too, which is crazy.
Wendy: Crazy?
Wendy: Tell me it's not meant to be.
Wendy: It's meant to be.
Wendy: Be.
Siren: Oh my gosh.
Wendy: Me, me.
Siren: That's that's the note.
Siren: That's what we were going for.
Wendy: Um, giving Twilight glitter, motherfucker.
Wendy: Okay.
Siren: beyond that, I feel like one of the things that drew me to you
Siren: is our similar, vibe in terms of, would I like to call
Siren: abundance and scarcity?
Siren: And you often say, like when one of us wins, we all win.
Wendy: When we're all together and we unite.
Wendy: We're a fucking force when the world is trying to fucking mute
Wendy: us in every fucking way.
Siren: Did you say yeet us or eat us?
Wendy: I said mute, but yeet sounds really fine to eat meat.
Wendy: All the queers.
Wendy: Meat.
Wendy: That sounds.
Wendy: I mean, that sounds better.
Wendy: Honestly, they are trying to eat us.
Wendy: But here we are.
Wendy: it's a motherfucking movement, and it's beautiful.
Siren: just so everybody's aware as
Siren: we're going into this, this
Siren: being our first time through the
Siren: podcast, we want to set this
Siren: tone.
Siren: Like we're generally not going
Siren: to be getting into the science
Siren: end of things or much it's going
Siren: to be mostly our personal
Siren: experience here.
Siren: Right, Wendy.
Wendy: Um.
Siren: So like with that in mind, We're going to be talking about things
Siren: that we're curious about, things that we queer people, as LGBTQ
Siren: community, even the allies, advocates and the people on the
Siren: outside of this community that have questions for us can ask in
Siren: a comfortable way
Wendy: As long as you're respectful.
Wendy: Right.
Wendy: I'm an open book, baby.
Wendy: Let's go, let's go.
Siren: Right.
Siren: So with that, we are recording live on TikTok right now.
Siren: We have an audience here.
Siren: currently, as we're recording this episode, we got, what,
Siren: thirty two on this side?
Siren: How many you got over there, Wendy?
Wendy: Thirty four?
Siren: Hell yeah.
Siren: So There's sixty plus people
Siren: listening to this live right
Siren: now.
Siren: on TikTok as we record this, which is amazing.
Wendy: Anything can.
Wendy: Happen.
Siren: And anything can happen, right?
Siren: Especially when our tongues are out.
Siren: I'm fucking here for it.
Siren: Oh my God.
Siren: So number one.
Siren: We made it.
Siren: How long has it been recording for?
Siren: Seventeen minutes.
Siren: Seventeen minutes, which we can cut some time out of.
Siren: Good job.
Wendy: Yes, we did it.
Wendy: We did it.
Wendy: Segment one.
Siren: so we don't have a full title for segment one yet, but right
Siren: now is, The Spark.
Siren: we've talked about cold questions.
Siren: We have these like hot reaction
Siren: questions where Wendy and I came
Siren: up with some questions ahead of
Siren: time that we were going to ask
Siren: each other to get some cold
Siren: responses before they could be
Siren: flirty.
Siren: They'd be deep, chaotic.
Siren: downright off the wall.
Siren: Weird.
Siren: It could be something to do with something spicy.
Siren: It could be something to do with something.
Siren: anything.
Siren: Anything fucking anything.
Wendy: Dame. anything is game.
Wendy: All right, My first question.
Siren: one of us is probably going to overshare.
Siren: Spoiler.
Siren: It's probably going to be me
Wendy: Okay, so something I was very
Wendy: curious about is when did you
Wendy: realize that you wanted to
Wendy: transition?
Wendy: And, what made you decide to hard sell that shit?
Wendy: Especially with, how your family
Wendy: would react and your
Wendy: relationship and everyone around
Wendy: you.
Wendy: So I was curious to know how that looked.
Siren: So I came out late in life.
Siren: I didn't really have a lot of
Siren: time to explore who I was when I
Siren: was younger.
Siren: And I think a lot of that had to do with the era that I lived in.
Siren: I didn't know that other queer
Siren: people, especially other trans
Siren: people, even existed in the
Siren: world until, I was like Thirteen
Siren: or fourteen.
Siren: And by then I was really just, so entrenched in the church and
Siren: youth ministries and stuff.
Siren: And then in the two thousand, which if you were a part of
Siren: that, you know very well, how crazy some of that, some of the
Siren: stuff in there could get in terms of like making you want to
Siren: not be yourself.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: so it wasn't until I was thirty
Siren: three years old, right around
Siren: this time, actually, right in
Siren: the beginning of October, my
Siren: oldest, was thinking of
Siren: Halloween costumes for the
Siren: family and was obsessed with
Siren: Scooby-Doo at the time and
Siren: wanted to go Scooby-Doo and the
Siren: gang.
Siren: he wanted to be Shaggy.
Siren: We had a dog.
Siren: My ex and I. I'm named Roscoe, who went to Scooby.
Siren: Obviously my ex really wanted to go as Daphne, and then we had my
Siren: youngest, who was assigned male at birth, and then myself.
Siren: between Fred and Velma, my ex
Siren: when we were figuring this out
Siren: was like, we can dress, we can
Siren: get we can get Huxley up as as
Siren: Velma.
Siren: That's fine.
Siren: You can be Fred like, it's it's fine.
Siren: And I sat in that moment.
Siren: I remember in the car we were going up to, like, her parents
Siren: house for something, probably like, I don't know, the
Siren: beginning of, like this.
Siren: This is the lore drop.
Siren: You ready for a big ass lore drop?
Siren: Um, probably the beginning of archery season.
Siren: Like hunting season.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Um, I have may or may not.
Siren: Have I hit a deer with multiple arrows before in my life?
Siren: Um, all of them have survived.
Wendy: Oh.
Siren: Yeah. I'm a terrible shot, guys.
Siren: I'm awful.
Siren: So don't don't get me involved in it.
Siren: Don't get me involved in it.
Siren: Yes, but I have I have attempted, um, that before.
Siren: So that's probably when it was.
Siren: But, um, on our way up there, I was like, I told her this.
Siren: I was like, I don't know why, but I kind of want to be Velma.
Siren: And in that moment, I didn't say this out loud at the time, but I
Siren: was like, I need to figure out what that means.
Siren: Yeah, because, I had started, hearing more about, just the
Siren: trans story and like that, from other people's perspective.
Siren: I hadn't really dived in entirely.
Siren: But at that point in life, it had unlocked something.
Siren: I think that that feeling had unlocked something.
Siren: Over the next month, I explored
Siren: it and I think the hard sell
Siren: moment.
Siren: I think it would help me more than anything else.
Siren: Was my my former partner.
Siren: Um, at the time.
Siren: Uh, I'm not gonna name her right now because.
Siren: I don't know, I don't have her permission to name her, but.
Wendy: Right.
Wendy: Mind your business.
Wendy: Right.
Siren: Um, but she was incredible.
Siren: She was incredibly supportive.
Siren: And every time that I like, after I had after my egg had
Siren: cracked, and I kind of realized what was going on and who I was,
Siren: and, like, all these memories kept flooding back in.
Siren: Every time I'd have a crash, I'd be like, I can't do this.
Siren: This is crazy.
Siren: Like, what the hell?
Siren: This is insane.
Siren: Like, I'm just like, no, no, no. It's like, I'll just.
Siren: I'll put up with it.
Siren: I'll bear with it.
Siren: It's fine.
Siren: I'll just.
Siren: I'll deal with it every single time.
Siren: Every single time she came at me was like, you have everything to
Siren: gain basically like this is the opportunity to be who you are.
Siren: Like, you can't throw that away.
Siren: You would never tell anybody else to throw that away.
Siren: And like like she was just so encouraging in those moments.
Wendy: That's really awesome.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Yeah. I had to drop it on my mom and my dad.
Siren: My dad took it really well.
Siren: My mom did not.
Siren: Took it as expected.
Wendy: How long from you figuring that out and starting the process
Wendy: with, like, your ex partner?
Wendy: Did you decide to tell your parents?
Siren: I'm pretty sure I told them,
Siren: like, early November, And I
Siren: basically was like, I don't
Siren: really know what this is, but
Siren: it's something.
Siren: And I might be trans, I don't
Siren: know, but I'm gonna explore it
Siren: and.
Siren: I hope I have your support.
Wendy: Right.
Siren: was kind of that conversation.
Wendy: Now, did you lose anyone over this?
Siren: Oh my God, countless people.
Wendy: People that were, like, really, really close to you.
Siren: I mean, at this point, I haven't
Siren: talked to my dad for, like, nine
Siren: months.
Siren: that's less over me and more over how I support my kid.
Wendy: Right?
Siren: But.
Wendy: That's very brave.
Wendy: I'm proud of you.
Siren: Thank you.
Wendy: Very, very brave.
Wendy: I'm like.
Wendy: Can you imagine, like people listening?
Wendy: The viewers.
Wendy: Can you.
Wendy: Can you fucking imagine how that would be just to do that?
Wendy: That takes a lot of courage.
Wendy: You know, takes a lot of courage.
Siren: Someone had just asked, um, what did the exploring part of your
Siren: life look like?
Siren: I think especially in that point, the exploring was very
Siren: like behind closed doors.
Siren: My ex knew about it, and my kids were too young to kind of
Siren: realize what was going on, especially my youngest.
Siren: she was two.
Wendy: So really, she's only known you as.
Siren: Oh, yeah.
Wendy: Mom.
Siren: Oh, yeah.
Siren: Yeah. I've only ever been mom to her.
Wendy: So is it like Mom and mommy or what?
Wendy: Yeah. Like. Okay.
Wendy: And your oldest, how does your oldest handle.
Wendy: Like how did they handle it?
Siren: I mean, he was five, so he was also kind of.
Siren: He didn't really, you know, kids.
Siren: Kids love you.
Siren: They love you as a person they don't like.
Siren: It's so beyond their understanding of you is so
Siren: beyond your gender.
Wendy: Have they ever, like, rebelled against that at all?
Wendy: Or. They've just been totally like they moved right into it.
Siren: My, they they goof about it when
Siren: they don't realize that it hurts
Siren: me.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: You know, like calling me dad, like, jokingly calling me dad,
Siren: but they don't realize that it hurts me sometimes.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: but they've never done it intentionally.
Wendy: You can.
Wendy: Drop them off at the fire station for a couple.
Wendy: Days.
Siren: No, no, they're they're incredible kids, to be honest.
Siren: Like, I love them so much.
Siren: I just, I love I love being a mom.
Siren: That was a that was a big that was a big, deep question to kind
Siren: of jump us off with.
Siren: I was starting with like some like silly like kind of spicy
Siren: things, but like.
Wendy: Nope.
Wendy: We're getting.
Wendy: Deep.
Siren: No. Okay.
Wendy: Yeah. We'll get spicy later.
Wendy: Well, I go, you go.
Wendy: You're tagged in, baby.
Wendy: What do you got for me?
Siren: We've never talked about this.
Siren: Do you have children?
Wendy: I do not.
Siren: You don't have kids?
Wendy: I consider some my kids, but I have not given birth to any
Wendy: children besides Titus, my dog.
Siren: Do you regret not having children?
Wendy: I think that, when I was younger, I wanted to have kids
Wendy: because I love kids.
Wendy: And I'm like, kids are very drawn to me.
Wendy: And I'm very Mama bear with kids
Wendy: and protective I just am able to
Wendy: understand a kid and freely,
Wendy: just, like, have fun with them,
Wendy: but also try to like, teach them
Wendy: without being like making them
Wendy: think that you're judging them
Wendy: or.
Wendy: But I have twenty one nieces and
Wendy: nephews and ten greats, so like
Wendy: I had to help raise half of
Wendy: these kids.
Wendy: So, once I got to a certain age,
Wendy: I was like, you know, you have
Wendy: to run after these little
Wendy: motherfuckers.
Wendy: Like, have you ever chased a two year old around?
Wendy: I know you have.
Wendy: They fucking are so fast.
Wendy: They're fast as fuck.
Siren: There's a moment when you're a parent.
Siren: There's parents out there that realize this.
Siren: And aunts and uncles, I assume,
Siren: that, are out there that realize
Siren: this, too.
Siren: There's a moment where the child
Siren: can run faster than you can
Siren: walk.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: And that moment, you're fucking done for when you have to trot
Siren: or run to keep up with them.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Like.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Oh my God. All bets.
Wendy: Are off.
Wendy: I got to the age where I was like, you know what?
Wendy: I'm getting too old to chase you around.
Wendy: And not only that, I don't want to chase you around.
Wendy: So, I was like, I have enough
Wendy: nieces and nephews, and I'm open
Wendy: to, like, my partner having
Wendy: kids.
Wendy: I would say, being married twice
Wendy: and being with someone in my
Wendy: first marriage.
Wendy: No kids, just my nieces and nephews, mainly that were around
Wendy: and they were younger.
Wendy: And then being in a relationship
Wendy: with someone who actively had
Wendy: kids in the house was very
Wendy: different.
Wendy: Like it brought up a lot of my
Wendy: kind of trauma with having a big
Wendy: family and like, don't touch my
Wendy: shit.
Wendy: Don't touch.
Wendy: Like with the kids.
Wendy: It's like there's nothing that's not off bounds, you know?
Wendy: Like, you want to share my clothes and, like, wear my shoes
Wendy: and like, oh my God, you might fucking stain it.
Wendy: And that was like a control thing that I had to, sort of get
Wendy: over and just be whatever, kid.
Wendy: Go go through the closet if you want to wear something.
Wendy: But at first it was hard because I was used to having to hide
Wendy: stuff from my family because, I moved out at sixteen and
Wendy: everything that I worked for, these motherfuckers tried to
Wendy: take all the time.
Wendy: so, a lot of trauma responses with stuff.
Wendy: I'm forty four now, so I'm ready to maybe be a little Grandma
Wendy: Wendy, maybe like Ma'am.
Wendy: All up in this bitch.
Wendy: Let's go.
Wendy: Will we have the little baby?
Wendy: And then we send the baby back to the parents after a day or
Wendy: two, you know?
Wendy: Yeah, and I'm okay with that.
Siren: Yeah, absolutely.
Siren: I think that's that's a role that, like, every kid needs in
Siren: their life, too.
Siren: It's not just like the parent role.
Siren: Like, honestly, kids need adults in their life.
Siren: They don't need adults in their life.
Siren: They're gonna act like kids, or they just need adults in their
Siren: life who aren't gonna get mad at them for acting like kids.
Siren: Yeah, you know what I mean?
Siren: And that aren't their parents.
Siren: They need adults that they can
Siren: trust that aren't gonna get mad
Siren: at them for acting like kids
Siren: and, like, you know, that's what
Siren: that's what.
Wendy: Just let him.
Wendy: Be.
Siren: Yeah.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: Because, look, we're all.
Wendy: We're all learning this life together.
Wendy: You know, there's no manual.
Wendy: There's no handbook.
Wendy: those are good ones.
Wendy: Those were good ones.
Wendy: Let's go.
Siren: Okay, I'm gonna loosen it up just a little bit.
Siren: I'm just gonna loosen it up just a little bit.
Wendy: Okay.
Siren: What is the worst lesbian stereotype that you accidentally
Siren: lived up to.
Wendy: That.
Wendy: You accidentally lived up to?
Siren: Yeah. Like, what stereotype did you like that you.
Siren: That you accidentally.
Siren: Just like you just like, were like.
Siren: You know what?
Siren: Fuck it.
Siren: It's me.
Siren: We're going for it.
Wendy: Oh, no.
Wendy: Did I live up to a stereotype?
Wendy: You hauling?
Wendy: Yeah, for sure.
Siren: You you definitely.
Siren: You you hard as a.
Wendy: Oh, yeah.
Wendy: I've done it with both.
Wendy: Both marriages.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Oh my gosh.
Siren: How how long did it take.
Wendy: Um.
Wendy: The first one like three weeks.
Wendy: But we were together for thirteen years after.
Siren: After those three weeks.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Wow.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: And then the second one, it's different because we knew each
Wendy: other for nine years before, like we were friends.
Wendy: we always had this, connection
Wendy: and chemistry, but we never
Wendy: acted on it because we were with
Wendy: someone.
Wendy: So we just, like, were always drawn to each other.
Wendy: And then, um, I don't know, um, like day two, we started dating
Wendy: and then we moved in.
Wendy: We literally she proposed to me within two and a half months of
Wendy: us dating, and we were living together and married before a
Wendy: year was up.
Wendy: And then we were we were
Wendy: divorced and separated within
Wendy: that year.
Siren: So listen.
Wendy: Welcome to my life.
Siren: No one ever said being a lesbian was easy.
Siren: No one ever said that.
Wendy: To get divorced, married and divorce all New Years.
Wendy: Wild behavior.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: Wild.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: But
Siren: we learn and we grow.
Wendy: I mean, yes, when you know better, you do better.
Siren: you know what?
Siren: You know what's funny?
Siren: I to answer my own question.
Siren: I'm not sure if you want to, like, change it up and throw it
Siren: back at me, but to answer my own question, I actually think,
Siren: looking back, I'm pretty sure my ex and I kind of.
Siren: Uvalde.
Siren: Yeah, yeah.
Siren: Like I.
Wendy: I'm not.
Wendy: Surprised you're a lesbian.
Wendy: Hello.
Siren: I know this is what I'm saying
Siren: is like like she basically moved
Siren: in with me two months after we
Siren: started dating.
Siren: Was like, lived in my house.
Siren: and we were together for a long time after that.
Wendy: Look, I think not only lesbians can.
Wendy: Newhall.
Wendy: I think that's true.
Wendy: Of heterosexual people.
Wendy: Newhall, too.
Siren: That's true.
Siren: Absolutely, absolutely.
Siren: It's just one of those stereotypes.
Siren: the other one for sure, one hundred percent.
Siren: Subaru knew I was a lesbian before I knew I was a lesbian.
Wendy: I fucking.
Wendy: Hate it.
Siren: one hundred percent.
Wendy: Everyone that comes into the chat when they see me because
Wendy: I'm blatantly a lesbian.
Wendy: What kind of Subaru are you driving?
Wendy: And what do I say?
Wendy: Ask your mom because I was fucking her in.
Wendy: It last night.
Wendy: So ask your motherfucking mama because she liked my Subaru all
Wendy: up in her coochie ru.
Speaker 5: Oh my God.
Wendy: Oh, good.
Speaker 5: Oh my God.
Wendy: I digress.
Siren: We all digress.
Wendy: Yes, someone said I have a Honda Fit because I'm a pansexual.
Wendy: Well, I know a pansexual that
Wendy: has a big ass Chevy fucking
Wendy: truck.
Siren: So did they put, um, like, uh, cojones on the back?
Wendy: No, no.
Wendy: No. That is so stupid.
Speaker 5: Well, I mean.
Siren: If you want to make your truck trans like your truck, if you.
Wendy: Put.
Siren: If you put testicles on a truck, you'd make it transgender.
Wendy: Oh.
Wendy: Why can't why can't we get, like, pussy lips for the back of
Wendy: the truck, though?
Wendy: Why?
Wendy: I always thought that'd be like.
Siren: God, that'd be so good, though.
Siren: Oh my.
Wendy: God.
Wendy: But you don't ever see, like, a pair of tits or fucking.
Wendy: You're flapping ass pussy.
Siren: Well, like, here's the thing.
Siren: Well, the thing with the the the balls too.
Siren: Like what?
Siren: Like, who wants to see that?
Siren: Like, I don't want to see that.
Wendy: Who likes balls?
Wendy: Like, honestly, who likes them?
Wendy: Exactly.
Wendy: Crickets.
Wendy: Crickets boys.
Siren: Maybe. Yeah, I don't know.
Siren: Anybody.
Siren: Can we get.
Siren: This is a quick poll of the of the TikTok live chat.
Siren: Can we get, um, can we get this is this is no judgment.
Siren: No judgment whatsoever.
Siren: Everybody, everybody close your eyes.
Siren: Everybody.
Siren: No. No peeking.
Siren: Close your eyes.
Wendy: No peeking.
Siren: And if if you if you like.
Siren: If you like balls in a in.
Wendy: A in.
Wendy: In.
Wendy: The chat.
Siren: In that sort of sense.
Siren: Put a check mark in the chat.
Wendy: Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah.
Siren: And we're not going to say the name.
Siren: We're not going to say the name.
Siren: I'm just going to count how many check marks come up.
Wendy: Yeah. Just who likes it.
Wendy: I got one.
Siren: I got one I got one over here.
Wendy: Yeah one.
Wendy: Okay, okay.
Wendy: We got one, two.
Siren: You got one over there.
Siren: Maybe that's why we're lesbians.
Wendy: From.
Wendy: Time to time.
Wendy: You got some explaining to do later.
Siren: But maybe that's why we're lesbians.
Siren: Maybe.
Siren: I got two over here.
Siren: I got another one over here.
Siren: Okay, we can't find the.
Siren: Okay, fine.
Siren: Okay, fine I this is why I'm a lesbian.
Siren: This is why I'm a lesbian.
Wendy: You're gonna have some explaining to do.
Wendy: Okay?
Wendy: V, get out of here.
Siren: Okay, so I'm gayer than I thought I was.
Siren: love this for me.
Wendy: Okay, so.
Wendy: Now it's my turn to ask you.
Wendy: A question.
Wendy: Yes.
Wendy: Wrong. Question two.
Wendy: Question two.
Wendy: You know how, like, if you're aroused, you're entranced.
Wendy: You're engorged.
Wendy: Your fucking body's on fire when it comes to someone.
Wendy: Or you could just look at a picture or you have a thought.
Wendy: Does your cooter ever tingle?
Siren: Oh, yes.
Wendy: Does she?
Siren: Oh my God, yes.
Wendy: Oh my gosh.
Wendy: Isn't that the best thing ever?
Wendy: How do you feel about that?
Siren: Oh it's amazing.
Siren: It's amazing.
Wendy: Shimmy purring.
Siren: Yeah. And I think at first, like the crazy part, when I was
Siren: healing because I like.
Siren: I've had my bottom surgery,
Siren: which means I was assigned male
Siren: at birth.
Siren: I had the dangly bits, but I
Siren: don't have any dangly bits
Siren: anymore.
Wendy: They anymore.
Wendy: They.
Siren: Changed it all around so that there's no more dangly bits.
Siren: And it looks like it not.
Siren: It just looks like it is.
Siren: It's.
Siren: It's beautiful.
Siren: Beautiful, pristine vulva.
Siren: when she was healing, when the
Siren: nerves were kind of reconnecting
Siren: in that whole area, this was
Siren: even like beyond moments of,
Siren: being aroused.
Siren: This was just literally the
Siren: muscles would twitch and things
Siren: like that.
Siren: And I'm just like, sitting here
Siren: and like, the muscle would just
Siren: go like, I'm like, what are you
Siren: doing?
Siren: What are you doing?
Wendy: She's fucking raring.
Wendy: Up.
Siren: I guess.
Siren: Um, and like, no, you can, like, you can tell like, when I'm
Siren: even, like by by feeling my partner can tell by touching.
Siren: That I am aroused, that I am
Siren: like, that my body is aroused by
Siren: by touch, by feel of how they
Siren: did it.
Siren: So that's that's kind of cool.
Siren: That's a good.
Wendy: Question.
Wendy: Can't be tingling.
Wendy: Like, do you feel feral?
Wendy: Because I'll be, like, feral as
Wendy: fuck over like the smallest
Wendy: shit.
Wendy: A picture, a thought, like you looking jacked up with your
Wendy: fucking hair a mess and your fucking bummy clothes and, like,
Wendy: whatever, I'm gonna we're gonna.
Wendy: Shit's gonna happen in person.
Siren: Yes. It doesn't usually happen with a picture.
Wendy: Have to be in person.
Wendy: Like it will legit happen if we're separate.
Siren: Yeah.
Wendy: And something is said or we're
Wendy: FaceTiming or we're on the phone
Wendy: or there's a picture sent that's
Wendy: just the person, not even a
Wendy: spicy picture.
Wendy: Mhm.
Siren: She purrs I've, I've had um,
Siren: this was even before I had
Siren: surgery.
Siren: This was the first time I
Siren: noticed a difference in how my
Siren: brain and body reacted to being
Siren: aroused.
Siren: Just on hormones like body.
Siren: Exactly the same.
Siren: it was the first time I went out with a boy.
Siren: The first time I went out with, like, a I was a trans guy.
Siren: we went on a first date.
Siren: It was cute.
Siren: We didn't do anything.
Siren: We didn't even kiss or anything.
Siren: It was just a cute date.
Siren: And then the second date, we went on a hike.
Siren: And after the hike, we were chatting.
Siren: This was the cutest moment ever.
Siren: I'm leaning up against his Subaru.
Siren: because he used to be, married to a woman, before he came out,
Siren: so obviously owned a Subaru, as we've previously discussed or
Siren: discussed Anyway, um, so I'm leaning up against a Subaru, And
Siren: he's doing the thing where he's like talking to me, but he's
Siren: like starting on one side and then, like, moves slowly around
Siren: to like the other side.
Siren: It takes like it takes a solid, like forty five seconds, right?
Siren: To get from one side of me to
Siren: the other side, like through the
Siren: conversation.
Siren: It makes sense, like in the flow and the banter, like moving
Siren: around and taking steps.
Siren: But I can, I can tell because I've been on that side.
Siren: I can tell that he wants to, come in and kiss me And I'm
Siren: like, three laps around, I'm like, I feel like there's
Siren: something on your mind.
Siren: Is there something that you want to do right now?
Siren: Um, and eventually I had my first.
Siren: The first time I kissed a boy was that was in that moment.
Siren: That was like what I talked about in that poem.
Siren: Like the first time I kissed a boy felt like fireworks began.
Siren: And the craziest part about it wasn't even the moment.
Siren: I mean, I felt it like I felt
Siren: like I felt like the kind of
Siren: start, like kind of a core, like
Siren: sacral chakra area, which is not
Siren: where that usually started for
Siren: me.
Siren: but the crazy part it was an
Siren: hour and a half later, after he
Siren: had left to go do something
Siren: else, and I go to the grocery
Siren: store to do some grocery
Siren: shopping.
Siren: I remember this moment, and I swear to God, Wendy, if I was
Siren: not holding on to a grocery cart, I would have hit the
Siren: fucking ground because my legs gave out from under me.
Siren: Like.
Siren: Like I had never felt anything like that before.
Siren: Like my legs were gone.
Wendy: That's the power of the pussy, baby.
Wendy: Let's go.
Siren: I know, but it's.
Siren: It's hormones.
Siren: It's crazy.
Siren: It's like it's freaking.
Siren: It's so crazy.
Siren: And, like, that's something we
Siren: can get into another time, too,
Siren: is how much like, truly, your
Siren: experience of being a woman is
Siren: about the hormones that are in
Siren: your body?
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: More than the body parts you were born with.
Wendy: just for for funsies.
Wendy: Did you, you rather orgasm with your new.
Siren: Oh my God. Fuck, yeah.
Siren: Oh my God.
Siren: Yes.
Siren: So many thousand million.
Siren: Two like I can't even.
Siren: They're not on same.
Siren: They're playing different games.
Siren: They're different games.
Wendy: They're on different books.
Siren: Well again it's like it's less the body part and it's more the
Siren: hormones because it was before the body part change.
Siren: that it like, started feeling
Siren: different and an orgasm With T
Siren: as your primary hormone It's
Siren: very like trumpet loud all at
Siren: once.
Siren: Like like we're gonna like,
Siren: everything is all at once and
Siren: it's done.
Siren: Okay.
Siren: you can kind of feel the trumpet like gathering their things
Siren: together, like to, to start.
Siren: But once it starts, it's going to be fucking loud and quick and
Siren: then it's going to be done.
Siren: and it's great.
Siren: Right?
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: But it's like a fucking.
Siren: It's like an orchestra, baby.
Siren: It's like.
Siren: Like the antithesis is like.
Siren: It's like you can hear the
Siren: string section warming up and
Siren: you move into, like the next,
Siren: like fucking axe and modes of
Siren: this song as things rise and
Siren: fall and those moments of pause
Siren: and break.
Siren: I swear to fucking God.
Siren: Do you have any idea how much hotter it is when you break for,
Siren: like, five minutes?
Siren: Do you just take a five minute break?
Siren: Get a drink of water and then just jump back into it?
Siren: Holy shit.
Siren: Guys.
Siren: Like it's an anthology.
Siren: A beautiful anthology.
Siren: Exactly.
Siren: Oh my God.
Siren: And it lasts like.
Siren: Yes, there's like, there is one climactic moment.
Siren: Right?
Siren: But it's it's every moment
Siren: before and every moment after
Siren: that is like, oh, my God, it's
Siren: so hot.
Wendy: Also, don't touch me because I
Wendy: might fucking jump out of my
Wendy: goddamn skin.
Wendy: Stop it!
Wendy: Don't touch me.
Wendy: Just pause where you're at.
Wendy: Don't fucking move.
Wendy: Just let me.
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy: That was a good one.
Speaker 6: That was a good one.
Siren: Wendy's getting a little feral.
Siren: Guys.
Wendy: I'm always Pharrell.
Siren: Do you want one more question?
Wendy: One more question.
Wendy: Okay.
Siren: Yeah. Yeah. the biggest difference to make note of
Siren: Wendy, you've been in like lesbian culture for how long?
Wendy: Twenty three years.
Siren: Twenty three years.
Siren: So and I've been a part of it
Siren: for four years, barely I say,
Siren: barely, because for the first
Siren: couple years, I wasn't putting
Siren: myself anywhere out in the
Siren: world.
Siren: Not that I wasn't accepted, I just I wasn't like.
Wendy: Just trying.
Wendy: To figure it.
Wendy: Out.
Siren: Trying to figure out who the fuck I was.
Siren: You know.
Wendy: It's hard.
Wendy: Yeah, absolutely.
Siren: Okay, so, the L word.
Siren: I'm assuming you've seen the L word, right?
Wendy: Yes. Okay.
Siren: Who do you most identify with on the L word, and who do you most
Siren: identify with on the L word?
Siren: And then who would you fuck on the L word?
Siren: I would say fuck, marry, kill,
Wendy: Oh, yes. Fuck. Marry. Kill. Please.
Wendy: Fuck. Marry.
Wendy: Kill.
Siren: Fuck. Marry. Kill. On, uh.
Siren: On the l word.
Siren: Go for it.
Wendy: Kill. Jenny.
Siren: Jenny!
Wendy: Goodbye, bitch.
Wendy: Uh, bye.
Siren: I loved season one.
Siren: Jenny.
Siren: For a little bit.
Wendy: A little bit like a fucking 20s.
Wendy: And then that bitch was gone.
Wendy: Canceled.
Wendy: Uh, fuck.
Wendy: Carmen.
Wendy: Mary.
Wendy: Bet.
Wendy: Oh, my fucking God!
Wendy: Jennifer.
Wendy: Beals.
Wendy: Holy shit, Holy shit, Holy shit.
Wendy: Yes.
Siren: When did you watch the L word?
Wendy: Uh, right when it came out.
Wendy: Locked in.
Siren: Like, two years ago, two and a half years ago is when I watched
Siren: it, and I was like, Holy shit.
Siren: Like, if I watch this, if I had watched this ten years ago, I
Siren: would have known then.
Siren: Moving on.
Siren: Wendy, what's your question?
Wendy: I'm mostly stemming on like your transition, if that's okay.
Siren: That's totally fine.
Wendy: do you ever regret your transitioning because of how
Wendy: fucking hateful everyone is in in the world?
Wendy: Do you ever, like, regret it?
Wendy: Because I'm sure things could be a lot easier if you were just a
Wendy: regular cis man.
Wendy: You know what I mean?
Wendy: Like, it's it's took a lot of bravery and heart and, like, you
Wendy: have to deal with a lot of adversaries, like coming out and
Wendy: being your like, true self.
Wendy: Has there ever been a point in time where you're like, I should
Wendy: not have fucking done this because I feel sad?
Siren: A great question, Wendy. And I don't take it lightly, because I
Siren: think there were definitely moments Especially earlier on
Siren: when I was in, like, the really deep despair of losing my ex.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: That I wish this had never
Siren: happened to me or I wish I
Siren: hadn't made the decision, but as
Siren: soon as I spoke it out loud, as
Siren: soon as I would say something
Siren: like that.
Siren: Yeah, it would instantly like my
Siren: brain would be like, what the
Siren: fuck?
Siren: Like, are you serious?
Siren: Like, like listing off all of the other things of, like.
Siren: how much worse it would be if I
Siren: had done like gone back the
Siren: other way, but like, honestly at
Siren: this point, like how if I'd even
Siren: be alive?
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: because I'll tell you what.
Siren: Like the hardest thing.
Siren: When I was, when I was a
Siren: Christian, when I was doing,
Siren: when I was going to church all
Siren: the time and like, um, like
Siren: doing the youth pastor thing, it
Siren: was easy to hide this version of
Siren: me because I wasn't trying to be
Siren: myself.
Siren: I was trying to be what they wanted me to be.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: So as soon as I let go of that and started trying to be me and
Siren: started uncovering all the the pages and all the gunk that had
Siren: piled up over this truth.
Siren: once I started pulling that
Siren: away, I couldn't get away from
Siren: this.
Siren: there was no hiding it again.
Wendy: You couldn't imagine going back to that?
Siren: No. I would have to go back to so much like to be able to cover
Siren: it up effectively would be.
Siren: I wouldn't be able to do it.
Siren: So even if I wanted to, like, my brain wouldn't, there's no way
Siren: my brain would allow me to.
Siren: and I would circle into, like, a fucking despair.
Siren: Like it would be awful.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Have you ever seen, the movie?
Siren: I saw the TV glow.
Siren: I'd be seeing.
Siren: I saw the TV glow.
Siren: Uh, you need to watch that.
Siren: it's a horror movie.
Siren: I say that loosely.
Siren: They have it categorized as that, but it is a allegory of,
Siren: the experience of being trans. this main character who.
Siren: Lives her whole life with seeing it and like, never allowing it
Siren: to be, like, reconciled or unburied and like, just like
Siren: this incredibly deep emotional representation of how that
Siren: feels, especially at the end.
Siren: Yeah.
Siren: segment number two, we want to do, Queerly controversial.
Siren: Let's get messy with love.
Siren: I love this, what do we want to talk about today?
Wendy: Do you have a topic?
Siren: Well, the original one was
Siren: Should queer people gatekeep
Siren: queer spaces?
Siren: More or less.
Wendy: Should queer people gatekeep queer spaces?
Wendy: More or less.
Wendy: See, I think this is like a double edged sword for me.
Wendy: You know what I mean?
Wendy: just because the fucking world
Wendy: is on fire, you know it's
Wendy: fucking twenty twenty five,
Wendy: almost twenty twenty six right
Wendy: now.
Wendy: The date is October second, twenty twenty five.
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy: Y'all know what's going on in the world.
Wendy: a big part of me, I'd say fifty
Wendy: or sixty percent says yes, and
Wendy: my yes is because I feel like I
Wendy: can't trust people that are not
Wendy: in the queer community to not
Wendy: hurt us.
Wendy: and that sucks to have to feel that way.
Wendy: You know what I mean?
Wendy: Because, if you want to come hang out in our fucking space
Wendy: I'm all for it.
Wendy: Like, get on over here, and let's paint the town gay.
Wendy: But a big part of me is like, I
Wendy: don't know if I can trust you
Wendy: because are you going to put me
Wendy: in danger?
Wendy: Are you going to put my friends in danger?
Wendy: And that is something that's really scary to me.
Wendy: But then another part of me is just like, I have six friends
Wendy: that are heterosexual that like, they love to hang out with the
Wendy: queer people and they have such a good time.
Wendy: So I think that's it's very much situational.
Siren: Yeah.
Wendy: It would depend on what we were doing.
Wendy: You know what we had planned,
Wendy: what we were doing, where we
Wendy: were going.
Wendy: And I might have to say hard.
Wendy: No.
Siren: Yeah.
Wendy: Yeah. It's tough.
Wendy: Outnumber us.
Wendy: It's really a hard no.
Siren: Right, exactly. And I mean, I've
Siren: been to I went to my first gay
Siren: bar recently.
Siren: like two summers ago.
Siren: I went to Woody's in Philadelphia.
Siren: Shout out Philly, shout out Woody's.
Wendy: Uh, Woody.
Siren: And
Wendy: They got the wood.
Siren: It was the first time I gone.
Siren: I went to a gay club.
Siren: It was the first time to a club in general for me since I was,
Siren: like, twenty years old, nineteen or twenty years old, and snuck
Siren: into the Iguana Cantina in Baltimore with my friends and
Siren: I'm now like thirty seven.
Siren: so it had been a minute.
Siren: And to go like what I had hoped to be more of like a safe haven
Siren: for queer people There were way more straight people there than
Siren: were there was any gay people like there was so many.
Siren: It was a tourist.
Siren: They were tourists.
Siren: It was crazy and like to the point where I'd be hanging out
Siren: with people and like, dancing with my friends or like meeting
Siren: new people there.
Siren: And there would be men walking up to women that were clearly
Siren: dancing together and like, not there for them and would like
Siren: introduce, like would interrupt their dancing and like hit on
Siren: them and stuff.
Siren: It was crazy.
Siren: so in spaces like that I want to say like, yeah, like gatekeeping
Siren: to an extent, but like, at what point at like to what point?
Siren: To what end?
Siren: I mean, we saw what happened in
Siren: Orlando and like all these other
Siren: places and like, you know, clubs
Siren: like that, like we want to be
Siren: careful.
Siren: So like, I see both edges.
Siren: I know that I feel less.
Wendy: Safe.
Siren: In some spaces than others.
Wendy: yeah.
Wendy: And that's the sucky thing about it, is that you can immediately
Wendy: go somewhere and tell you're not going to feel safe.
Wendy: You're going to be stared at.
Wendy: You're going to be judged, you know?
Wendy: You know, just like I told you
Wendy: about the concert I went to,
Wendy: that's not the first time that's
Wendy: happened.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: You know.
Wendy: it was a couple years ago.
Wendy: I am from Indianapolis.
Wendy: I was at work.
Wendy: My job was at near the side of
Wendy: town that I was going to go to a
Wendy: concert to.
Wendy: So I. Went ahead and went to the concert and I was meeting my
Wendy: best friend there.
Wendy: could have been a country concert, I don't know.
Wendy: She she likes a lot of country music, so I'm just standing
Wendy: outside of the venue.
Wendy: Deer Creek.
Wendy: We call it Deer Creek, but it's not that anymore.
Wendy: But if you're from Indiana, you call it Deer Creek.
Wendy: And I'm standing there just
Wendy: waiting on my friend and by
Wendy: myself.
Wendy: And this cis white male walked
Wendy: up to me and said, uh, you look
Wendy: like you're a faggot, aren't
Wendy: you?
Wendy: I should I should beat your ass.
Wendy: And I was literally just standing there not saying
Wendy: anything, not doing anything, just waiting for my friend.
Wendy: And that's a situation where, I could have been hurt.
Wendy: you were so bold enough to come
Wendy: up to me and say that, it's
Wendy: crazy.
Wendy: that's not the first time that's happened that I've been called
Wendy: out my name or, like, threatened just because of the way I look.
Wendy: How long ago was this?
Wendy: This was just a couple.
Wendy: A couple years ago.
Wendy: Maybe three at the most.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Yeah. I'm sorry.
Wendy: That happened.
Wendy: And it's just getting worse.
Wendy: I mean, you just had some shit
Wendy: happen to you like, fucking two
Wendy: weeks ago.
Wendy: You know what I mean?
Wendy: Like, this shit is crazy.
Siren: I should happen to me all the time.
Wendy: Um, yeah.
Wendy: I mean, the the amount of times that we go somewhere and you
Wendy: can't unsee the fact that I'm.
Wendy: I'm gay because I am a lesbian, and people just fucking stare at
Wendy: you, or they talk or.
Wendy: You know what I mean?
Wendy: And then you just can't be comfortable in your own space,
Wendy: and all you're doing is grocery shopping or going to an event
Wendy: with your family, or, you know what I mean?
Wendy: Going to a fucking movie or a concert.
Wendy: When.
Siren: You know the eyes are on you and
Siren: you know that the whispers are
Siren: about you.
Siren: It's it's a lot of it's hard, especially when you don't feel
Siren: safe in the space already.
Wendy: Yeah yeah.
Siren: Yeah, yeah.
Wendy: And to have to have, you know, when me and my ex-wife were
Wendy: together, we went to her first pride in Indy.
Wendy: And we're on the way.
Wendy: We're on we're either on the way there or there, and I said, so
Wendy: we need to have a game plan if we're ready to leave.
Wendy: And she goes, what?
Wendy: Like if if like somebody's
Wendy: talking your ear off and you
Wendy: don't want to stick around, I'm
Wendy: like, no, if someone starts like
Wendy: mass shooting because we're at a
Wendy: pride event.
Wendy: and that was something I never
Wendy: talked about before, but I
Wendy: thought it was important to
Wendy: like, have a conversation with
Wendy: her just in case that might pop
Wendy: off.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: Of what to do.
Wendy: Yeah. I was to have to live in that space.
Siren: I was just walking back from my
Siren: car to start, like back into my
Siren: job, someone yelled from a
Siren: truck, um, across the parking
Siren: lot, called me the f word, the f
Siren: word, and.
Siren: I feel I'm pretty fucking confident person.
Siren: You know what I mean?
Siren: So I stand up and I say, like, you want to say that a little
Siren: bit louder and a little bit to my face because I know they just
Siren: fucking drive away.
Siren: I was feeling it that day.
Wendy: Right.
Wendy: You were like, fuck around.
Siren: Guy revs his engine to two high school kids stand up in the bed
Siren: of the truck.
Siren: I there's not one person in the
Siren: truck, but four people in truck
Siren: six total.
Siren: If you include the two in the back and the revs, the engine
Siren: drives towards me like speeding up towards me.
Siren: He would have had to jump a curb to get there, I was the most
Siren: scared I've ever been in my entire life was in that moment.
Siren: and I was standing outside of my
Siren: job at, like, two in the
Siren: afternoon.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: So it's scary and it's scary.
Siren: And it's like when we want a safe space as like people who
Siren: are visibly queer to exist.
Wendy: We don't get that safe space.
Siren: We need a little gatekeeping.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: and you know what?
Wendy: honestly, it makes me think a
Wendy: lot about, like, people of color
Wendy: when I came out and, you're
Wendy: blatantly just fucking hated on
Wendy: it makes me realize that this is
Wendy: just a fucking fragment of what
Wendy: people of color have had to go
Wendy: through for so many fucking
Wendy: years, and it's just so it's
Wendy: sad.
Wendy: Terrifying, infuriating.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: So the question Again is should we gatekeep queer spaces?
Siren: More or.
Wendy: Less.
Wendy: I'm changing my answer to fuck yeah.
Siren: Yeah.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: I think yes.
Siren: But then the question is, how do we do that?
Siren: because yes, there are some people who there are people who
Siren: I've had to block from my community because of how they.
Siren: Choose to interact with people
Siren: and how they choose to hold
Siren: themselves.
Siren: For everybody's safety.
Wendy: And like.
Wendy: Look, we have some amazing allies, right?
Wendy: So we're not putting everybody in a box because we have amazing
Wendy: allies that will fucking fight ten toes down for us, But We'll
Wendy: let them in the back door.
Wendy: But we don't like butt stuff, so calm down.
Siren: We haven't we haven't gotten.
Wendy: To the episode in there.
Siren: We haven't gotten to the episode where we talk about butt stuff
Siren: because we probably should talk about butt stuff.
Wendy: We will.
Wendy: I'll put that on the list.
Wendy: Butt stuff along with deal breakers.
Siren: So a teaser for a future episode.
Siren: I'm a trans woman.
Siren: I had my bottom surgery, but I had a vulva plasty.
Siren: Which means that I didn't put another box.
Siren: I didn't get a build a box as part of my surgery.
Siren: So there's no there's no other extra holes down there.
Siren: So if we want to talk about the
Siren: other entryway, Like we can talk
Siren: about that.
Siren: And, you I got some I got some first hand experience here.
Siren: So like again, nothing's off limits.
Wendy: okay okay.
Wendy: Okay. Are we wrapping this up and going into segment three?
Siren: Yeah, I think so.
Wendy: Tongues out Q and a Q and A. So you want to do a couple
Wendy: questions from each chat.
Wendy: We'll just go back and forth.
Siren: Yeah. Let's do a couple questions from each chat.
Siren: So I have one in the discord to start.
Siren: what's one position that works
Siren: best, but, like, what's your
Siren: favorite position?
Wendy: Can we do we have a category or like.
Siren: I mean, there should be categories, right?
Wendy: The I want to do or that's done to me.
Wendy: Which which one are we like?
Siren: Where do you hope to find yourself.
Wendy: In someone's pussy at all times?
Siren: Okay. Valid.
Wendy: I.
Wendy: Will smother myself to death before I come up for air.
Siren: Perfect.
Wendy: If you don't come, I'm not gonna
Wendy: fucking take a breath until you
Wendy: come.
Wendy: And I don't care how long I'm down there.
Siren: what we're hearing.
Siren: be careful with the words.
Siren: Keep going if you're with Wendy.
Siren: Because, like, like she's gonna
Siren: keep going until she just can't
Siren: keep going.
Wendy: Yeah, I mean, you're gonna fucking tap out.
Wendy: We're not like, oh, my God, you're taking too long.
Wendy: Like grow up.
Wendy: No, we.
Siren: Blocked the entire night off.
Siren: This is an event.
Wendy: For.
Wendy: A snorkel, a snorkel.
Wendy: So it's just we can put it in the nose and it just.
Wendy: You can take a little.
Wendy: Breath.
Wendy: Because I've literally I almost passed out.
Siren: It happens.
Wendy: It happens.
Wendy: Passed out.
Wendy: Before.
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy: You go.
Siren: I think for me is I think it
Siren: really depends on the person, I
Siren: feel like it's less about
Siren: position.
Siren: Is that am I am I skirting the question?
Wendy: Yeah you are.
Wendy: Answer.
Wendy: It.
Siren: position I mean like honestly
Siren: hands bound above my head would
Siren: be perfect.
Siren: Yeah, I mean, that's kind of ideal.
Siren: Beyond that, I don't give a shit.
Wendy: I mean, let's go.
Wendy: we have a question in the chat from Katie Tater Tot.
Wendy: I have only had queer relations once.
Wendy: It was not for me.
Wendy: Do you judge straight folks for trying?
Wendy: No. Sexuality is a spectrum I love.
Wendy: We do not judge.
Wendy: If you're exploring and like, that's it's consensual.
Wendy: Like there's nothing wrong with you exploring what you like.
Wendy: You like what you like.
Wendy: I don't like dick.
Wendy: I don't like boys.
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy: And we know that.
Wendy: We tried it.
Wendy: We didn't like it.
Wendy: You know.
Siren: We don't need to get into the details.
Siren: It's scientific.
Speaker 9: Why would why would we why would we judge, you know?
Wendy: No. Absolutely not.
Wendy: Yeah. No.
Siren: You have to explore.
Siren: You have to try new things.
Siren: And like, consent is fucking everything.
Siren: Consent is everything.
Siren: Okay?
Siren: And if you decide that you don't
Siren: like it, you can just not like
Siren: it.
Siren: You can just be like, hey guys, I'm out.
Siren: I'm done.
Siren: Like, nope, nope.
Siren: I say, guys, is like this, this fictitious whatever I'm doing,
Siren: there are multiple men there.
Siren: I'm like, what?
Siren: Okay.
Wendy: There's twenty.
Wendy: And we're like.
Wendy: Look.
Siren: Look, guys, we're done.
Siren: We're done boys, let's go.
Wendy: Being tossed.
Wendy: Around here, there's too many dicks coming out.
Siren: Oh my God, that's way too many.
Siren: That's way too many.
Wendy: Way.
Wendy: Too many dicks coming at.
Wendy: Me. I would.
Wendy: Say that about a vagina never.
Wendy: Coming at me.
Wendy: Do you prefer monogamous relationships?
Wendy: Yes. I'm very monogamous.
Siren: Yes and.
Wendy: No.
Wendy: A a relationship person.
Siren: I'm not trying to skirt the question.
Siren: Yes and no. Like.
Siren: I have only been in monogamous relationships, but monogamous in
Siren: the way that like, we can still make out with our friends
Wendy: Do you want to make out with me?
Wendy: Is that what you're saying?
Wendy: It was like one time I made out
Wendy: with my friend and we got
Wendy: married.
Siren: Is this the one you U-Haul with?
Siren: Is this the one you U-Haul with the second time?
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: one of them.
Siren: One of.
Wendy: Them?
Wendy: I mean.
Wendy: Technically, she fucking U-Haul
Wendy: with me because she's going to
Wendy: ask me to marry her and to move
Wendy: in.
Wendy: just because.
Siren: They call it a U-Haul doesn't
Siren: mean you get to, like, blame the
Siren: other person.
Siren: It's a we.
Wendy: Hall.
Wendy: Not a we.
Wendy: Hall.
Wendy: two guilty parties.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: Two guilty parties.
Siren: And like squeezy and I have been together for like a year and a
Siren: half, and we are monogamous in the sense that, like, we've
Siren: neither one has found anybody that we're like, hey, I want to
Siren: make this not monogamous anymore, but we're both open for
Siren: a conversation if we need to have a conversation.
Wendy: Have you ever cheated?
Siren: I, I have not, I have not
Siren: cheated on someone that I've
Siren: been dating, but I've been
Siren: cheated on, and I've helped
Siren: someone cheat.
Siren: I've been cheated with, I should say.
Siren: Does that make sense?
Siren: Like someone cheated on their person with me.
Wendy: With you?
Wendy: Mhm.
Siren: both in high school.
Wendy: did I ever have sex with another person?
Wendy: No. Did I cheat?
Wendy: Yes.
Wendy: my first wife, if y'all don't know, cheated on me on and off
Wendy: for thirteen years.
Wendy: And I did not love myself enough.
Wendy: And I stayed with her.
Wendy: but it got to the point where it happened, like, three times and
Wendy: someone showed interest in me.
Wendy: And it was nice having some attention from someone.
Wendy: So I emotionally cheated.
Wendy: And we.
Wendy: We made out.
Wendy: But I've never liked slept with another person and cheated on
Wendy: someone that way.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: I think for me, one of the
Siren: reasons why I never did it was
Siren: less about like, any sort of
Siren: moral obligation.
Siren: I mean, I had a moral obligation, but I never really
Siren: felt like I had the temptation.
Siren: And I think part of it was I never felt like I, I never felt
Siren: like anybody would liked me.
Siren: I feel like anybody was into me.
Siren: Like, why would anybody be into me?
Siren: Because I. I so loathed myself.
Siren: Every aspect of who I was in terms of my body, especially so
Siren: for someone to have a like a very, like, primal, like
Siren: physical crush on me, my brain could not oh fuck.
Siren: My brain could not.
Siren: I could never expect someone to do that because there was like,
Siren: I don't know, not at all.
Siren: But now it's different.
Siren: Do you have a relationship with the church or religion?
Wendy: Not really like that.
Wendy: I mean, I went to church when I was younger.
Wendy: I enjoyed going.
Wendy: Like, it was fun.
Wendy: I did it when I was younger, probably like eight to.
Wendy: Ten or eleven.
Wendy: And then I went to a Catholic school in eighth grade.
Wendy: And Catholic people They're another breed.
Wendy: you know, there's like slot machines, booze and cigarettes
Wendy: and, like, these priest house.
Wendy: And I'm just like, Holy shit, what's happening here?
Wendy: but I don't have religious
Wendy: trauma, from parents or anything
Wendy: like that.
Wendy: They weren't really into going to church or being religious.
Wendy: My grandmother was, I was close with her.
Wendy: she didn't judge me for being gay.
Wendy: She didn't preach to me, but there was always this underlying
Wendy: like, it's not okay, So yeah.
Wendy: I don't get into religion.
Wendy: It's just not for me.
Wendy: I don't yuck your yum if like it's something that you like and
Wendy: it gives you hope and something to believe in.
Wendy: Who am I to take that from you?
Wendy: It's just not for me.
Wendy: don't make me feel bad about it.
Wendy: don't squeeze it down my throat
Wendy: or make me try to stomach it I
Wendy: don't want.
Wendy: To.
Siren: Exactly. Yeah, I think that your
Siren: relationship with the church is
Siren: a little different than mine
Siren: you've been out for Twenty plus
Siren: years.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: I was heavily, deeply involved in religion and Christianity for
Siren: about twenty years.
Wendy: Yeah.
Siren: now, if someone asked me if God exists, I would say that God is
Siren: everything is all of it is me.
Siren: Is you, is them, is the air we breathe, is the thoughts we
Siren: think is the fucking TV screen in our living rooms?
Siren: Is all of it combined into one thing?
Siren: If we could do that, if we could
Siren: pull it all together, that's
Siren: God.
Siren: That's what I got.
Wendy: We got one more question.
Siren: Okay.
Wendy: your best advice for someone new
Wendy: to the lesbian dating scene from
Wendy: experience.
Wendy: I think you should be your most authentic self and surround
Wendy: yourself with people that let you freely be you.
Wendy: And don't make you feel bad about it.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: Do you have anything to add to that?
Siren: I feel like you're the authority on that, to be honest.
Siren: and we can get into this another time.
Siren: But my experience is like dating cis lesbians has been not great.
Wendy: Yeah.
Wendy: What's your favorite artificial flavor?
Siren: Purple.
Wendy: What's in my mouth right now?
Wendy: Purple.
Wendy: Purple and.
Wendy: Green.
Siren: Purple.
Wendy: Purple and green, baby.
Siren: And blue.
Siren: I really like.
Siren: I really like a sour blue.
Wendy: Like
Wendy: Blue raspberry.
Siren: Yeah, yeah yeah, yeah.
Siren: All right, so next episode, guys, what's coming up next?
Siren: we got some teaser topics to potentially look at for the next
Siren: episode of Tongues Out, the podcast that, who the fuck knows
Siren: what kind of chaos we're going to get into when we're here?
Wendy: What stuff is up next?
Siren: But stuff is on the list.
Wendy: Red flags.
Siren: I think navigating friendships like queer friendships
Siren: post-breakup, is an interesting topic for discussion.
Wendy: Yes.
Wendy: Yeah. What queer means to you.
Siren: Queer friendships in general.
Siren: Yeah. Oh my gosh.
Siren: Spicy like queer friendship is so spicy.
Siren: You just want to make out all the time.
Siren: But you can't because you're
Siren: like friends and you're like,
Siren: that person's dating that
Siren: person.
Siren: And like, oh my gosh, it's crazy.
Siren: It's crazy.
Wendy: Oh my God.
Wendy: Y'all will have to, let us know what you thought about it.
Wendy: If you're digging it, if you're
Wendy: feeling it, if you want us to
Wendy: record more, if you loved it, if
Wendy: you hate it, what we can do
Wendy: better.
Wendy: We couldn't do anything better because we're perfect.
Wendy: But other than that, you can drop your thought.
Wendy: I don't know if we'll pick it up, but you can drop it.
Wendy: And we appreciate you.
Wendy: And we love you.
Siren: Keep it queer.
Siren: Keep it spicy and maybe text your crush after this.
Wendy: This is the pilot of Tung Tung.
Wendy: Tung Tung.
Wendy: That's our name.
Wendy: Is it?
Wendy: Is it Tung?
Siren: I thought it was Tung.
Siren: Is it tongues out or tongue first?
Siren: Tongue first.
Wendy: Tongue first.
Siren: Tongue first.
Siren: Did I introduce it as tongues?
Siren: Out its tongue first.
Siren: Tongue first.
Wendy: Tongue.
Wendy: First. Tongue first.
Wendy: All right.
Wendy: We love you all.
Wendy: We appreciate you.
Wendy: We're going to stop the recordings now, and we're going
Wendy: to vibe the fuck out.
Wendy: Till next time.
Siren: Tongue tied.
Siren: Don't worry.
Siren: We'll loosen you up next time.
Siren: Oh my gosh.
Siren: Thank you for letting us be part of your queer little corner of
Siren: the world today.
Speaker: Thanks for tuning in to the very
Speaker: first episode of Tongue first,
Speaker: the Queer Curiosity podcast with
Speaker: a bite.
Speaker: If you laughed, learned, or even blushed a little, hit subscribe
Speaker: and leave a review wherever you get your podcasts.
Speaker: Your support keeps the mics hot
Speaker: and the conversations even
Speaker: hotter.
Speaker: New episodes drop every week, so we'll see you soon.
Speaker: Until next time, stay curious,
Speaker: stay queer, and don't forget to
Speaker: lick responsibly.
Speaker: Tongue.
Speaker: First is written and hosted by
Speaker: Aubrey Jane Jones and Wendy
Speaker: Reeves.
Speaker: Produced and edited by Aubrey Jane Jones.
Speaker: Recorded live with our Tik Tok
Speaker: communities where chaos and
Speaker: curiosity collide.
Speaker: Special thanks to our Tik Tok moderators for keeping things
Speaker: running smoothly, and to Brookdale for lending her voice
Speaker: to our intro and outro.