I've failed plenty of times. Oh that was all
off. You know why? Because it's definitely not
that. It's not that. No. Yeti or not, here we
come. Welcome back y 'all. We're doing it again.
Mostly out of a weird desperation. Please like
and subscribe you Oh Every time to do it. It's
right now right now before Before things pop
off you can be an og or what I write down this
area There'll be a thing because that we're gonna
put are we gonna put it here? I don't know last
time. I was like I'll put it up right here, and
then I just put Because you know what it's a
lot of Extra work going and doing all that stuff
and editing and it's like, you know, it's really
cool two people saw this and We appreciate you
all of you. Yeah all two of you all of them It
just is what it is and we're just gonna keep
doing it until There's no more stories yeah,
we're gonna do it until all the mysteries are
solved. Yeah, let's talk about I guess That's
how that's going down. We are going to never
stop. That's that one. Keep on keeping on. All
right. What do we got? All right. Today, a story.
Let me let me set the scene for you. OK. In the
shadowy depths of. Oh, OK. We've got to set it.
Yeah. All right. Here we go. Perfect. In the
shadowy depths of West Virginia's Appalachian
forests where legends like Mothman and Bigfoot
roam the collective imagination. Lurks a lesser
known oddity. The vegetable man. What the f***?
Yeah. The vegetable man. When you told me about
that, I was like, pretty much that was it. Like,
what? The vegetable man? Yeah, I came across
that. I was like, I got it. No more. You know
what? This makes sense because it's like in the
Appalachian Mountains where they're all like,
my sister's my mom. Damn vegetables coming after
me. No offense. I mean. We know that's not a
real thing. That's a total stereotype. Yeah,
inbreeding doesn't happen there. Yeah. And well,
you you let into it. So this works. Oh, I had
no idea. But so the vegetable man or commonly
called the veggie man, often mistakenly associated
with North Virginia. Did a regional mix -ups
and folk the folklore bleeds this cryptid is
firm firmly rooted in the northern West, Virginia.
Oh Mary County West Virginia not just regular.
Virginia. Just Virginia. It's strictly West Virginia
I Lost my spot already, you know, that's great
because of all the awesome comments that we would
get on social media where somebody has to be
like, oh, hey, you just like learn to talk before
you say stuff. You're right. I should. OK, I'm
not going to disagree with you. Yeah, 100%. You're
right. But also mostly because you're not going
to watch the whole thing. You watch the 15 second
clip that I put up. We'll just not make a clip
of that. Yeah. And no one will know. You have
no idea. Whatever. You know, I just stop. I was
like, I can't look at this stuff all day long.
I'm just going to delete it on there. Like, it's
good if everybody else is following along. Like,
I can't. I keep looking at it. And then I want
to be like, did you? I'm like, I don't know.
I don't know why I get even upset. Like, why
does it matter? Like, I don't know this guy.
Who cares? They hate us because they ain't us,
man. Exactly. Probably not. But whatever everybody
is just that's what you do. If you want to get
the most comments, our biggest thing is the one
that triggers people. It's like, oh, what are
you? I don't even remember what the video was
about. The Moss at the Moss. Yeah. And people
get off. If you haven't seen that one, go check
it out. The Mima Mounds went and checked it out.
Solved some mysteries maybe. Yeah, I solved that.
It's just a bunch of hills that I don't know
what made it and nobody does and neither do you.
So we talked to some people on the scene. It
was a good one. Go check it out. Yeah, there
were aliens there. Alien people. That's right.
There are O US's. Yes. That was a theory. There's
a lot of things. Yes. Anyway, I needed to get
that out of this. That's that's this is what
this is. This is mental health. Yeah, it's a
healthy their channel Mainly just for our own
health everybody else what you know, you get
out of it Maybe probably not but it helps me.
So that's that's fine. That's all I care about
me. Maybe you I care about. I mean, okay, I care
about a lot. I care about you. I care a lot.
Thanks, man. Okay. Now that we got that out of
the way, we go back to our scary story here with
the festival. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hang on. Hang
on here. Hang on. First reported in 1968. It's
a tale of a tall plant like humanoid that allegedly
communicated telepathically. drain a hunter's
blood and vanished into the woods dismissed by
skeptics as a hoax or hallucination yet embraced
by cryptid enthusiasts the vegetable man blends
extraterrestrial vibes with an ecological horror
Horror horror my mom yelled at me for that word
once with it with an H not watching horror movies
Horror That's what I said. I got this big tongue
in my mouth and it's hard to get some of the
words out sometimes Yeah, let's dive into this
leafy enigma. No holds barred Including the gory
details of its vampiric encounter vampire vegetable
man. Yeah now before we get Before we get to
into the details that are true facts that grok
probably told us For some of the people that
are like well what your source is like none.
I don't care I just I'm just reading the story
and I'm having a good time with it the internet
is my source. Okay people That's the same place
everyone goes to get all their information. Yeah,
that's that's where everybody exactly. We're
just going to the internets Have you ever seen
the movie troll to I Don't think so, okay This
this you can't I don't know if you can see my
shirt there. You kind of can it's a weird movies
with mark He's a youtuber and he started just
doing like really bad Stupid movies. Okay, and
now he just he kind of changed it up like I don't
want to just do bad movies They can just be God,
you know weird. Okay, kind of like what we're
doing just weird stuff. I Love his channel and
that's why I wanted to represent a little bit
for him. Shout out to mark if he ever sees this
He talked about this movie a lot of youtubers
talk about this movie and It almost sounds exactly
like this. Okay in a way Just to sum it up. We'll
have to actually sit down and just watch this
like and and the the key might be something well
watch this um to sum it up this family is doing
an exchange with another family from out in the
country and they live in the city And apparently
this is supposed to be a normal thing. I've never
heard of that in my life. Switch homes. Yeah,
we're going to go be farmers for a week. That's
weird. Yeah. And it's this town called Nilbog.
Well, when they get to the town, the kid realizes
that the town spelt backwards is Goblin. The
movie is called Troll 2, mind you. In the town
of Goblin. Yes. Well, it was made by, I believe,
this French director. I don't know if he's really
ever done movies before, but it was like, this
is my passion. And this is where I feel like
maybe this is us. This guy doesn't know what
the hell he's doing, but he was really passionate
about it. Somehow it made this weird icon of
a movie that is just so bad. So the goblins,
yeah, goblins in the movie, their favorite food
is plants, but it can't just be plants. It's
got to be plants that were made from people,
and they feed them this thing that turns them
into plants. It's like... reverse vegetarians
when they're like, oh, we're going to eat meat.
Oh, well, we just made too quirky, but we put
a bunch of weird things and plumped it up and
try to make it taste like it. So it's like a
weird reversal. And the guy's wife wrote it because
she hated vegetarians. And anyway, it sounds
kind of like the vegetable man to me. You know,
that's where you might have ended up getting
it is these vegetable people just reminded me
of it. Oh, we can we go back to the story unless
you got input on that because We've never seen
the movie. We should totally watch that. I'll
check it out. Well, we'll do that sometime All
right. The story begins in July 1968 near Rip
Rivesville in Marion County, West Virginia a
coal mining region known for its dense woodlands
and eerie isolation Wait coal miners in West
Virginia. Oh, wow Jennings H Frederick a 22 year
old bow hunter and soon -to -be Air Force enlistee
was scouting the ground was scouting for groundhogs
when he heard an unnatural high -pitched whining
sound like a record player spinning on hyperspeed
We Something like that. I'm sure that was another
movie turning towards the noise He spotted a
seven to eight foot tall figure emerging from
the underbrush According to Frederick's account
first published in UFO hoaxer Gary Barker's 1976
newsletter the creature approached slowly its
body swaying like like a stalk in the wind It
communicated telepathically in a distorted voice
Saying you need not fear me. I wish to communicate
I come as a friend we come in peace We come in
peace Don't need to know what you do in your
office. Oh, you know harm I come from a planet
where that you people Like that you people call
the moon So he's saying he comes from the moon.
The moon is not a planet moron. They the entity
could make sense needed medical assistance Okay,
this all this makes sense. It's a Squash squash.
Yes, and it's also Apparently retarded So communicative
in case my shin in case my stuttering and my
mispronunciation of words. Yeah, don't make fun
of me either I'm just as dumb I'll sum up that
part. So this guy's in the woods. Okay hunting
for groundhogs and he sees coming through a Big
tall gangly thing. Okay that communicates with
him Telepathically saying hey, don't be afraid.
I'm not here to hurt you Need help I need medical
assistance. I'm from the moon and I need your
help. I think you could just skip this is okay
This is where I'm thinking this this is a kind
of stupid alien The best way to freak somebody
out is be like, hey, I'm talking to you. You
know, you normally use your mouth for all that
I'm using my brain to talk with you. But check
this out. Um, yeah, I come from the moon and
You could have just walked up and like hey, man,
I need help Yeah, even though you're eight foot
tall, I think you would have got a better response.
I agree. I'm just saying that seems like a bad
way to approach it. So, okay. At that point,
things turned horrific when the vegetable man
lashed onto Frederick's arm with its suction
cup fingers tipped with sharp needle -like thorns.
These pierced his skin deeply, drawing blood
in a vampiric extraction that lasted about a
minute. Imagine the pain of multiple hypodermic
needles burrowing in sucking vital fluid without
resistance. This sounds like Hollywood. Frederick
felt a jolt with but no lasting injury. The creature
released him expressed gratitude telepathically
and fled uphill with leaps covering 25 feet or
more leaving a faint sulfurous odor. Thanks for
the blood bro. Peace out. Later. Bounce. Frederick
kept silent initially fearing ridicule. Oh yeah
understandable. but later shared with Barker,
who sensationalized it as an alien encounter.
No photos exist, only sketches and retellings.
Well, that all makes perfect sense to me. Next
story. No, there's more. The vegetable man is
described as a semi -humanoid abomination. Abdomination.
Words are hard sometimes. I know. Blending plant
and flesh in ways that equal parts bizarre. Aw,
man. Blending plants and flesh in a way that's
equal parts bizarre and horrifying. Standing
over seven feet tall, it's slender and stalk
-like, with fibrous green skin resembling vines
or reeds. So it's like a Batman villain. Yeah,
made out of wood and stuff. Or Groot. No distinct,
yes. It's a Groot. It's a Groot. Oh, all right.
Yes. No distinct head, just two large, oscillating
yellow and red eyes. on flexible stalks protruding
from its upper torso flanked by pointed elf -like
ears. Its arms are reed thin, ending in three
-fingered hands with suction cups and those infamous
thorn -tipped needles. I should say needle -tipped
thorns, maybe? I don't know. Perfect for impaling
flesh and draining blood without mercy. It moves
with gliding, silent grace, emitting a high -frequency
whine and possesses superhuman speed and agility.
If encountered, it could theoretically latch
on, pierce arteries, and ex... Oh man, extenuate...
I'm sorry. My parents are so proud of me right
now, probably. My dad doesn't see this and say,
had a boy son. Good job, this is why your guys'
channel sucks and fails. Anyway, maybe we'll
put the picture up, but they gotta... That's
the oh, yeah Okay, it looks like the dr. Seuss
version of the hobgoblin kind of okay. Well,
we'll put it up on screen I'm not gonna actually
put it. It's not impressive, but I'll put it
up on screen somewhere here Yeah, just so you
guys can see the stupid picture. We're looking
at because we have to look at it. Yes I don't
know. I'm not trying to rip on whoever drew that
thing but Some kid maybe I am I could draw better
than that. I think we worked with this guy before
I Think we know I don't have you ever seen that
that Maddox book No, oh my god, I had the book
it was the funniest thing I've ever seen in my
life And this is where I would get a lot of my
like humor Does I just rip on stuff? And it's
not because like, oh, I really hate this person.
It's just like, it's fun to make fun of people.
And so like, he would take all these kids' pictures
and rate them. And of course, it's kids' pictures.
So he'd just be like, that looks like ass. I
can draw way better than that. Yeah, he had a
whole book. and it started out on this Internet
web page that he made. And eventually he made
a book and I found out about like, I have to
buy that book. And I don't know where it went
once in a while. I pull it out and bring it.
I think I brought to work one day. I was like,
you guys got to read this book. It's hilarious.
And brought a picture book to work. Yeah, it
was a picture book where he basically like, oh,
look at this cool Batmobile that drew. He's like,
well, it looks like absolute I can draw way better
than that. Look at this. And then like he can
actually draw. But well, of course you can't
but it's part of the joke. So remember all the
dumb things I say is like Billy Madison playing
dodgeball. Yeah, you just hammer on those kids.
Well, it was fun. Yeah. Well, but he do ball.
It's dodgeball. So it's all it's all, you know,
take it with a grain of salt because people are
really harsh on the Internet. If you haven't
noticed, it's people will let you hear it like
that. Give it to you straight. Well, and that's
it's not even straight. It's just them like Watch
this. Screw you, guy. It's a lot of that. I don't
like how the internet and all this new technology
has come up in our generation has made it so
like people just... They would never tell you
that stuff face to face. No. Because you'd catch
the hands, you know? Yeah. But people are like
window warriors, you know? It's like, oh, well,
I'm safe, so I'm just going to... Trying to eviscerate
you verbally. It's a good and really hurts your
feelings because it's not Opposed you pose no
risk to me. So I'm just yeah Well, and sometimes
you just I mean you say stuff whatever and then
people get offended and it's like I don't really
mean like I don't even care just saying stuff
but there's a good example where say people just
The internet's real and then I'll just say whatever
I want like that youtuber that was going He's
like all just like hitting on your girlfriend
in front of you in front of Larry Wills and he's
oh, yeah what? Just slaps him in the face and
then I don't even know a little almost looks
like it's the same place and starts talking to
the former MMA guy and he's just like Cotton
elbow. I don't like the way you're talking to
me. I don't even like you and he's like, yeah
Well, I don't like you. I'd slap you I'd knock
you out right and he's like He goes okay. Those
are you serious? Okay elbow right to the face
and Then that guy started crying like you know
what? That's how things are supposed to go, but
we have this weird internet Thing we're like
like this. I'll just say whatever I want and
then people say whatever they want and you know
would be awesome If that guy saw this, I was
like, I'm going to go talk shit to that guy.
See if I can get him to slap me too. Yeah. You
know, that's probably all he was doing is like,
oh, I'm just going to talk a bunch of smack.
And when I get smacked, people will watch. If
I knew the video would go viral, like the next
day, I'd let one of those dudes slap me or elbow
me in the face. Like if you've seen Mike Tyson,
he was part of this thing where like, oh yeah,
would you fight Mike Tyson? And then... They
were talking into this microphone. They're like,
oh, yeah Yeah, I would I would take him out man.
Whatever mike tyson's a punk and then he'd jump
out and be like, hey man, what's up? But like
yeah that that's I mean You're right. So like
would you fight mike tyson? Yeah, because everybody
be watching I guess I don't really want to get
beat up a guarantee he It whooped my ass. Oh
for sure. Yeah, I wouldn't stand a chance No,
I don't care what kind of youtuber you are and
how much you say that you've trained It wasn't
real. You can still probably beat me up that
guy could probably Jake Paul probably beat me
up too or whatever the Paul brothers They probably
both beat me up. They got all the steroids. I
don't have any so they I got none. Yeah, I'm
all out That's why I'm so weak. There's There's
a festival About this. Oh, yeah, we were talking
about vegetable. Yeah, I totally forgot to that
looked at my phone. Oh, yeah That's what we're
doing. We're doing a thing right now. Okay? vegetable
man for decades vegetables That's a good transition
It's vegetable man for decades vegetable man
remain niche appearing in books like Brad Stegers
real alien space beings and creatures from other
worlds and online Wikipedia things But recent
years have seen a revival Marion County hosts
veggie man day an annual and place an annual
man They host that chief. I'm sorry. I don't
mean to laugh at you. Just your disability. Yes.
I'm not laughing at you I'm just laughing at
you. It's different. It's different because I
said so All right, so every year in Pleasant
Valley The third event in June 2025 featured
costumes, veggie -themed foods, cryptid vendors,
and Appalachian music. We gotta go. That would
be fun, man. We're going to Veggie Fest. What
is it even called? Veggie Man Day. Everybody
out there, hashtag Veggie Man Day. Let's do this.
This is where I thought it was cool, man, where
it kind of comes together a little bit for us.
The whole deal? Apparently was organized by a
podcast called moth boys. Oh Well, I don't know
who they are, but Check it out. Oh, hold on.
I should too probably I'm gonna have to look
that up So I don't forget so and apparently it's
it's like kind of family -friendly. It says it's
wholesome It's a wholesome celebration of West
Virginia's quirky lore and then you're called
the moth boys the moth boys Yeah, I got it. So
we don't forget. All right, we gotta gotta look
that up We are not exactly family friendly. I
try to be but we're trying I think we're I'm
kind of dumb. We're more family friendly than
a lot of stuff out there true that makes it on
people's Reels and stuff true half the stuff.
My cat was probably better. All right, you could
but that's the problem You can always be better
the but like we're trying to be better. That's
that's what's important guys. Yeah, you're trying
That's the Christian thing to do is just say
that you tried But you actually know it's not
you actually I try yes, okay But yeah a lot of
the stuff that kids go through shorts on this
one bag your band You can't watch those I watched
them and I'm like, why am I watching this? Yeah?
Just it's awful. I wouldn't even put them off
if we had a choice But what up? Oh Shorts, yeah
Anyway, that's that's the name of the game now,
man. Anyway, so is it real or not? I don't know
Yes, I Think it's just a tall tale. No, it's
real Well, oh was that the story? Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Oh, okay We did the whole story without
interrupting ourselves that much oh boy, I think
Well, if it is real it's probably good explanation
as to why no one's like seen it because And blend
in really good, you know Well, yeah, it would
plant it would blend in better to the surrounding
forests and like the Sasquatch or anything would
I think I like the theory of it's like Some sort
of a gourd squash, you know, so that's like a
squash squash. I like that term too squash That's
a hurt hard to say those squash squash squash
squash squash. If you just say it real fast squash
Yeah, so it's you know part plant and half man
and half pig and half How's that possible? Yes,
I am Al Gore. Okay, for real, I don't think anybody
saw. I don't think it was real. For real. No,
I don't think anybody saw anything. That doesn't
mean that they didn't see something that they
interpreted as, oh, it had to be some tall plant
thing. The only guy who who did anything with
the story was a guy who's known for like making
up stories, making up UFO stories. Oh my God.
He's Joseph Smith. Oh, now we just pissed off
all the Mormons. Oh, man. I don't think they're
allowed to have. I don't think they're allowed
to watch YouTube. Yeah, they're not allowed to.
listen to podcasts or watch YouTube or TikTok
or any of that. If you're Mormon and we're wrong,
please let us know in the comments. Oh, yeah.
Put that in the comments, you guys. And tell
us that we're wrong and tell us how much you
hate us. We love it. Love it. Love it. Anyway,
so that's okay. Yeah, I don't think it's real.
We got Sasquatch, Festival Man, Squash Watch,
and I don't think it's real, but there is a festival
that There is a real festival. It's coming up
then. Yeah. How do we get? Is it West Virginia?
Yeah, in Marion County. Pleasantville. Anyone's
called Pleasantville is the name of the town.
We got to go somehow. I don't know. That would
be fun. But that would be an awesome trip. Yeah.
Yeah. Pleasant Valley. And with that. June 2025.
Everybody, let's go. Hashtag whatever fest. Veggie
man day. Veggie man day. That would be a different
thing. Vegetable man day. We'll see you there.
We're gonna do it, yeah. Party on. Party on,
Wayne. Party on, Garth.