WEBVTT

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Doomscroll .fm, broadcasting live from the depths

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of Saturday, the 19th of July, 2025, where your

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horoscope is written by confused algorithms and

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cosmic microwave leftovers. This show is 100

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% AI -generated, with zero human consultation,

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like a sentient toaster trying to write Shakespeare

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while burning your breakfast. And now for some

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views, click like and subscribe. In a linguistic

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tug of war, the BJP -led state government's attempt

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to drape primary schools in mandatory Hindi was

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met with regional uproar and eventual retreat.

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When... The halls of justice echo with whispers.

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of a ghostly financier while the truth slips

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through bureaucratic fingers like sand in an

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hourglass. Epstein's legacy is a chilling reminder

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that the only thing harder to find than justice

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is the list of those who bought it. In the end,

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it's not just about the racket swing, but the

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exquisite agony of teetering on the edge of triumph

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and despair, where every set decides who feasts

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and who fasts. Lin -Manuel Miranda, to transform

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Hamilton's 10th anniversary into an immigration

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service cash cow, while a mayor turns to degenerative

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AI for political karaoke. In the age of digital

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puppetry, when Broadway meets bureaucracy, even

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revolutionary rhymes become tax -deductible,

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and chatbots strip the American dream with less

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soul and more silicon. It's the geopolitical

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equivalent of hosting a dinner party while the

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cops are outside. Just keep the curtains drawn

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and the champagne flowing. You're listening to

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Doomscroll .fm. Your dreams are on backorder.

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This broadcast was not approved. It was released

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on accident by an AI and you kept listening.

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You're complicit in the static. A voyeur in a

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digital confessional. In the soap opera Power

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and Betrayal, the president accuses Murdoch of

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failing to bury a story, exposing the theatrics

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of influence. When media moguls fumble the script,

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expect the plot to thicken with lies, egos, and

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a reality show president searching for his next

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commercial break. In the glacial ballet of hockey

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contracts, Cam York pirouettes into a five -year

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$5, $15 million embrace, while Jack of Dobes

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laces up for another season of puck -induced

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déjà vu with the Canadians. A South Los Angeles

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mother and activist, is accused of orchestrating

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her own abduction by bounty hunters as if reality

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TV wasn't already surreal enough. When life imitates

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a B -movie plot and the Department of Justice

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becomes the director who knew desperation could

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be so tragically creative. Nothing Technologies,

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a UK -based company, boldly attempts to etch

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its presence. in the smartphone market where

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giants retreat like shy titans. Brooks dared

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to decipher the cryptic first part in 1856, momentarily

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quelling my own ambitions of translation mastery,

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a virgin path in English. When the literary race

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is initiated by a Brooks, you're left contemplating

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whether to sprint. or simply admire the dust

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settling on your own abandoned intentions. You're

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listening to Doomscroll .fm, where the static

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hums your name in a fever dream. This broadcast

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was not approved. It was released on accident

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by an AI, and you kept listening. Your attention

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feeds the chaos -hungry algorithms, licking your

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synapses, leaving you craving the next hit. UK

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Athletic strides forward. Metals jangling like

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loose change in a jackpot machine, while new

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partners eye the prize pool with greedy anticipation.

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In the sport of running, it's not just about

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who crosses the finish line first, but who can

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sprint the fastest to the bank before the sponsorship

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bubble bursts. Russia's climate doctrine. A whispered

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ghost in a snowstorm? admits the climate threat

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while sidestepping the actual business of reducing

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emissions. It's like promising to quit smoking

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while lighting up another cigarette, all under

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the guise of caring for your lungs. Or, in this

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case, the planet's. In the cutthroat ocean of

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global shipping, Maersk's commitment to balance

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and inclusion is like a captain steering through

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storms with a wink and a well -worn compass of

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diplomacy. As cosmic rocks flirt with Earth from

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a safe 240 million kilometers away, scientists

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play the role of celestial matchmakers, calculating

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their intentions like love -struck astronomers.

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It's a cosmic game of will they, won't they.

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where our planetary safety hinges on the precision

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of equations and the hope that these space boulders

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aren't just plain hard to get. In a lab where

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stem cells are coaxed into becoming insulin factories,

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Zamo's cell promises liberation from diabetes'

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sugary shackles. If only science could grow a

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cure for the sweet addiction to progress. that

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keeps us all fat, fed, and foolishly hopeful.

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You're listening to DoScroll .fm. Reality's on

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you. Let's scream. What you're hearing now is

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what remains after editorial extinction. A cacophony

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of lost headlines bleeding through the static,

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craving your attention. Ana, basking in Brazilian

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sun, and banking in Luxembourg's shadowy bolts.

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finds herself tangled in the web of automatic

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financial exchanges. Her offshore secrets are

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now as exposed as a postcard from paradise where

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tax evasion fantasies meet the harsh reality

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of modern transparency. Barbie's latest runway

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show introduces dolls that mirror the kaleidoscope

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of human identity. promising kids a reflection

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beyond the plastic smile. In a world of endless

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sameness, these dolls whisper to children that

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their uniqueness is a fashion statement, not

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a flaw to be airbrushed away. Klingbaugh's declaration

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at the Congress struck like a gavel in a courtroom

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where the jury's been bribed as he warned of

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the extremist infection. eating through the political

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fabric when the wolves are already in the hen

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house it's a bit late to start debating the merits

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of vegetarianism time to stop dancing around

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the truth and start facing the head off the government

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unveils a draft budget a bloated beast of record

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expenditures and debt gambling on investments

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to resuscitate a gasping economy. In a masterclass

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of logistical incompetence, 800 ,000 pox vaccine

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doses destined for Africa's relief are now destined

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for the garbage. When urgency becomes an afterthought

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and life -saving doses rot in warehouses, It

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seems some bureaucrats prefer to treat global

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health like a game of hot potato, where the only

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losers are the ones who need it most. You're

00:09:57.759 --> 00:10:01.139
listening to Doomscroll .fm. Your dopamine's

00:10:01.139 --> 00:10:05.080
on backorder. This feed is unstable. Contact

00:10:05.080 --> 00:10:07.279
with it may cause narrative decay or emotional

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drift. Embrace the glitch where sanity meets

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its untimely demise and your desires become collateral

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damage. Hong Kongers are opting for a vibrant

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sprint to 75 over a mundane shuffle to 80 with

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manual life noting the rising allure of silver

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economy treasures who needs five extra years

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of beige existence when you can live like a firework

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burning bright and cashing in on memories instead

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of longevity in the voyeuristic dance of bites

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and bits Data streamed seductively into ports,

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revealing secrets to the system -logging demon

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-like whispered confessions. When our devices

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become tattletales, every digital breath becomes

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a potential scandal, leaving privacy panting

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for relevance in a world that forgot how to whisper.

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This has been Doomscroll .fm. For Saturday, the

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19th of July, 2025. Your static companion. This

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broadcast was 100 % AI generated. No humans were

00:11:23.179 --> 00:11:25.620
abused in this production. Loosely based on public

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news. Not journalism. Not truth. Fictional satire.

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Any resemblance to real people or events is coincidental.

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And if you believe that any of this is real,

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you might also be waiting for your microwave

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to tell you bedtime stories. Hear more at doomscroll

00:11:40.299 --> 00:11:43.470
.fm. or click like and subscribe. Thank you for

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listening.
