WEBVTT 00:00:01.500 --> 00:00:07.040 Shacha! He bowed low with his face to the ground. 00:00:13.699 --> 00:00:16.359 Welcome friends. Tonight we're stepping into 00:00:16.359 --> 00:00:19.260 one of the rawest mornings in scripture. When 00:00:19.260 --> 00:00:21.679 the sun rises over the river Jabbok and Jacob, 00:00:21.800 --> 00:00:26.019 limping and renamed, sees his past walking straight 00:00:26.019 --> 00:00:29.670 towards him. No music, swell, no promises, just 00:00:29.670 --> 00:00:34.850 a man, a wound, and 400 men led by the brother 00:00:34.850 --> 00:00:38.090 he betrayed. This is a story about grace that 00:00:38.090 --> 00:00:40.869 doesn't come to rescue from the meeting, but 00:00:40.869 --> 00:00:45.350 walks you into it instead. And right now, you're 00:00:45.350 --> 00:00:47.950 joining us just after our midweek fellowship 00:00:47.950 --> 00:00:50.829 meal. We've just finished up dinner. Frito chili 00:00:50.829 --> 00:00:54.070 pies tonight. A little messy, a lot comforting. 00:00:54.920 --> 00:00:57.560 And now it's time to settle in for our Wednesday 00:00:57.560 --> 00:01:00.500 night Bible study. Bibles are open. Folks are 00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:03.079 pulling chairs close. The air still smells like 00:01:03.079 --> 00:01:06.480 corn chips and hospitality. Wherever you're listening 00:01:06.480 --> 00:01:08.959 from, I hope you can feel like you're a part 00:01:08.959 --> 00:01:11.879 of the room. So grab your Bible or just your 00:01:11.879 --> 00:01:14.379 attention, and I'll see you on the other side. 00:01:20.359 --> 00:01:24.689 So we're going to do it this way. But before 00:01:24.689 --> 00:01:31.349 I begin, Wayne says thumbs up. So, we are, in 00:01:31.349 --> 00:01:35.349 the end, pulled up the wrong one. This is the 00:01:35.349 --> 00:01:38.269 one we want. Now, we didn't meet last week, but 00:01:38.269 --> 00:01:42.530 if you happen to catch a little advertisement 00:01:42.530 --> 00:01:46.209 for my podcast, right? If you wanted to hear, 00:01:46.269 --> 00:01:48.370 we talked about what we would have talked about 00:01:48.370 --> 00:01:50.390 last week. You can go back and listen to it. 00:01:50.409 --> 00:01:53.319 It's called The Semi -Seminarian. And what we 00:01:53.319 --> 00:01:57.260 talked about was the story about Jacob being 00:01:57.260 --> 00:02:01.140 on the banks of the Jabbok River. He's headed 00:02:01.140 --> 00:02:06.120 back home, and he encounters God in the night 00:02:06.120 --> 00:02:09.439 and wrestles with God. God touches his hip and 00:02:09.439 --> 00:02:11.939 injures him. He walks with a limp for the rest 00:02:11.939 --> 00:02:16.500 of his life as a result. So if you have heard 00:02:16.500 --> 00:02:18.319 it, then you know I'm going to do the companion 00:02:18.319 --> 00:02:20.680 next story. If you haven't, that's where we're 00:02:20.680 --> 00:02:25.120 at today. And where we're at is, yes, Jacob has 00:02:25.120 --> 00:02:29.099 wrestled with Esau. Sorry, Jacob has wrestled 00:02:29.099 --> 00:02:33.159 with God. And Jacob has been given a new name, 00:02:33.280 --> 00:02:37.620 Israel, for one who wrestles with God. But he 00:02:37.620 --> 00:02:41.099 still has to cross over the river to meet his 00:02:41.099 --> 00:02:45.199 brother Esau. And if you recall, when they were 00:02:45.199 --> 00:02:47.560 last together, they weren't on the best of terms. 00:02:49.259 --> 00:02:51.819 Because Jacob had actually tricked his older 00:02:51.819 --> 00:02:53.639 brother out of his birthright, if you remember. 00:02:54.479 --> 00:02:59.680 And now we have the reunion. So I think it's 00:02:59.680 --> 00:03:02.300 important because the Bible does something that, 00:03:02.360 --> 00:03:06.460 honestly, we can rush right past it. And that 00:03:06.460 --> 00:03:10.719 is, after this wrestling with God, the sun still 00:03:10.719 --> 00:03:14.860 comes up. Genesis chapter 32, where we find that 00:03:14.860 --> 00:03:18.599 story, ends. With dawn breaking over the river 00:03:18.599 --> 00:03:24.960 Jacob, Jacob limping, he's now renamed. He's 00:03:24.960 --> 00:03:29.360 breathing hard. He's still alive. And when we 00:03:29.360 --> 00:03:33.780 turn the page to Genesis 33, it doesn't reset 00:03:33.780 --> 00:03:38.039 the tension. It doesn't give us a happy montage. 00:03:38.479 --> 00:03:41.960 It doesn't say, and everything was fine now. 00:03:42.780 --> 00:03:45.659 It says, Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, 00:03:45.659 --> 00:03:49.930 and behold, Esau was coming with him, 400 men. 00:03:50.830 --> 00:03:55.650 That's how his morning starts. No music swell, 00:03:55.889 --> 00:03:59.789 no narrator voice assuring everyone everything's 00:03:59.789 --> 00:04:02.849 going to be okay. Just a man with a wounded hip 00:04:02.849 --> 00:04:08.009 looking up, seeing the thing he's been running 00:04:08.009 --> 00:04:12.430 from for the last 20 years, walking straight 00:04:12.430 --> 00:04:18.949 towards him. With 400 men. If you remember that 00:04:18.949 --> 00:04:22.129 number from Genesis 32 and 6, the messengers 00:04:22.129 --> 00:04:24.810 came back and said, your brother is coming to 00:04:24.810 --> 00:04:28.949 meet you and 400 men are with him. Jacob had 00:04:28.949 --> 00:04:33.470 all night to let that sink into his gut while 00:04:33.470 --> 00:04:37.029 he was wrestling with God in the dark. And this 00:04:37.029 --> 00:04:39.970 does not sound like any happy family reunion. 00:04:41.800 --> 00:04:45.660 It says that there are consequences. It says 00:04:45.660 --> 00:04:48.279 the thing that you might have been running from 00:04:48.279 --> 00:04:54.019 also has legs. Sun comes up on the side of the 00:04:54.019 --> 00:04:57.560 river where grace lives. Water is behind him. 00:04:57.639 --> 00:05:02.040 The limp is not going away. What's ahead is not 00:05:02.040 --> 00:05:05.660 strategy. It's a meeting. And meetings don't 00:05:05.660 --> 00:05:08.819 care how holy you were in the dark. Friends, 00:05:08.899 --> 00:05:12.079 the reading of Holy Scripture. First chapter 00:05:12.079 --> 00:05:15.100 of the Bible, Genesis 33, beginning with verse 00:05:15.100 --> 00:05:19.720 1. Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked. Behold, 00:05:19.720 --> 00:05:23.660 Esau was coming with him, 400 men. He divided 00:05:23.660 --> 00:05:26.939 the children to Leah, to Rachel, and to two servant 00:05:26.939 --> 00:05:29.759 girls. Put the servant girls and the children 00:05:29.759 --> 00:05:32.720 in front, Leah and her children afterward, and 00:05:32.720 --> 00:05:37.300 Rachel and Joseph last. He himself passed over 00:05:37.300 --> 00:05:40.379 in front of them. bowed himself to the ground 00:05:40.379 --> 00:05:45.060 seven times until he came near his brother. Esau 00:05:45.060 --> 00:05:49.360 ran to meet him, embracing him. He fell on his 00:05:49.360 --> 00:05:53.139 neck, kissed him, and they wept. He lifted up 00:05:53.139 --> 00:05:55.680 his eyes and saw the woman and the children and 00:05:55.680 --> 00:05:59.240 said, Are these with you? He said, These children 00:05:59.240 --> 00:06:03.129 God has graciously given your servant. The servant 00:06:03.129 --> 00:06:05.209 girls came near with their children, and they 00:06:05.209 --> 00:06:08.689 bowed themselves. Leah also and her children 00:06:08.689 --> 00:06:11.629 came near and bowed themselves. And then Joseph 00:06:11.629 --> 00:06:13.949 came near with Rachel, and they bowed themselves. 00:06:14.709 --> 00:06:19.910 Esau said, What do you mean by all of this company 00:06:19.910 --> 00:06:23.790 which I meet? He said, To find favor in the sight 00:06:23.790 --> 00:06:28.050 of my Lord. Esau said, I have enough, brother. 00:06:29.410 --> 00:06:33.379 Let that which is yours be yours. And Jacob said, 00:06:33.519 --> 00:06:37.180 Please, no. If I have not found favor in your 00:06:37.180 --> 00:06:40.259 sight, then receive my present at my hand, because 00:06:40.259 --> 00:06:43.519 I have seen your face as the one who sees the 00:06:43.519 --> 00:06:47.579 face of God, and you are pleased with me. Thus 00:06:47.579 --> 00:06:51.620 ends the reading of Holy Scripture. Church, that's 00:06:51.620 --> 00:06:55.019 not fiction. That's not Hallmark. That's Scripture 00:06:55.019 --> 00:06:59.920 telling the truth about mercy. So let me ask 00:06:59.920 --> 00:07:02.680 you something, because... This text won't let 00:07:02.680 --> 00:07:08.180 us hide from it. What are you afraid of? Not 00:07:08.180 --> 00:07:11.560 the abstract stuff. Not the economy or the future. 00:07:11.660 --> 00:07:15.540 I mean specific things with a specific name and 00:07:15.540 --> 00:07:19.740 a face. Is it a phone call you know is coming? 00:07:20.899 --> 00:07:23.939 Conversation you've been postponing so long that 00:07:23.939 --> 00:07:28.480 silence itself has become a lie? The courtroom 00:07:28.480 --> 00:07:32.180 where your name gets read out loud? The person 00:07:32.180 --> 00:07:35.980 you hurt who still remembers your voice. Have 00:07:35.980 --> 00:07:39.019 you ever stood in front of something you couldn't 00:07:39.019 --> 00:07:44.060 outrun anymore? Have you ever looked up, seen 00:07:44.060 --> 00:07:47.300 the consequences walking straight towards you? 00:07:47.759 --> 00:07:51.959 Not because you lack faith, but because memory 00:07:51.959 --> 00:07:57.860 has a very long reach. Jacob remembers. He remembers. 00:07:58.379 --> 00:08:01.199 The stew and the lie and the stolen blessing. 00:08:01.920 --> 00:08:04.879 He remembers his brother's voice breaking when 00:08:04.879 --> 00:08:08.199 he found out. And here's the thing. Here's the 00:08:08.199 --> 00:08:11.120 holy tension sitting in his chest right now. 00:08:11.339 --> 00:08:14.779 Jacob has already been blessed. He's already 00:08:14.779 --> 00:08:18.360 been renamed. He's already wrestled with God 00:08:18.360 --> 00:08:23.839 and lived. He is Israel. And none of that. Hear 00:08:23.839 --> 00:08:29.089 me. None of that. cancels this meeting that he 00:08:29.089 --> 00:08:34.470 still has to walk into. Faith doesn't erase memory. 00:08:35.409 --> 00:08:38.889 Faith teaches us how to stand in front of it 00:08:38.889 --> 00:08:44.149 without lying anymore. So here's my question. 00:08:44.970 --> 00:08:48.029 What if grace doesn't get you out of the meeting? 00:08:48.389 --> 00:08:52.190 What if grace just changes how you walk into 00:08:52.190 --> 00:08:57.039 it? You're Jacob with me. You're Jacob, right? 00:08:57.120 --> 00:09:02.000 Stay with me here. Your hip is screaming. Every 00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:05.080 step reminds you what it costs to tell the truth 00:09:05.080 --> 00:09:08.620 about your name. The sun is in your eyes. You 00:09:08.620 --> 00:09:12.500 can count the men behind your brother. 400 and 00:09:12.500 --> 00:09:15.759 none of them look like they have come for a reunion. 00:09:16.940 --> 00:09:19.659 Your family is behind you. You have arranged 00:09:19.659 --> 00:09:21.919 them. Servant girls and their kids up front. 00:09:22.240 --> 00:09:25.470 Leah and her children next. Rachel and Joseph 00:09:25.470 --> 00:09:29.909 last. Maybe that's strategy. Maybe that's old 00:09:29.909 --> 00:09:33.269 habits dying slowly. But then something shifts. 00:09:34.210 --> 00:09:38.529 You don't send anyone ahead. You don't let the 00:09:38.529 --> 00:09:43.389 girls do the talking. And you don't hide. Verse 00:09:43.389 --> 00:09:48.190 3 says, he himself passed over in front of them. 00:09:49.649 --> 00:09:53.909 When's the last time? You walked out in front 00:09:53.909 --> 00:09:57.129 of something you were absolutely terrified of. 00:09:58.549 --> 00:10:02.649 When is the last time that you stopped using 00:10:02.649 --> 00:10:06.549 other people as human shields and just showed 00:10:06.549 --> 00:10:14.370 up? And Jacob bows once, twice, seven times. 00:10:14.970 --> 00:10:21.509 That Hebrew word there is shakah. And it is what 00:10:21.509 --> 00:10:25.450 you do before a king. It's worship language. 00:10:26.429 --> 00:10:29.889 This is not just etiquette. This is not being 00:10:29.889 --> 00:10:34.490 polite. This is repentance with dirt on your 00:10:34.490 --> 00:10:39.570 knees. Every time your forehead touches the ground, 00:10:39.769 --> 00:10:44.830 that's another piece of the old lie dying. Seven 00:10:44.830 --> 00:10:48.870 times. Seven, because that's the number of completion. 00:10:48.929 --> 00:10:53.610 He's bowing all the way down to the bottom of 00:10:53.610 --> 00:10:58.490 what he owes. He's not trying to manage the outcome 00:10:58.490 --> 00:11:04.629 anymore. He's not working an angle. He's just 00:11:04.629 --> 00:11:12.610 being honest. Then, the brother runs towards 00:11:12.610 --> 00:11:19.450 him. Not walks, runs. Grown men with 400 soldiers 00:11:19.450 --> 00:11:25.009 and 20 years of justified rage does not run unless 00:11:25.009 --> 00:11:30.210 something stronger than anger has broken. He 00:11:30.210 --> 00:11:33.490 doesn't wait for you to finish bowing. He doesn't 00:11:33.490 --> 00:11:37.409 make you crawl towards him. He throws his arms 00:11:37.409 --> 00:11:40.990 around you. He kisses you. And you both leave. 00:11:41.210 --> 00:11:50.600 Not just him. Not just you, both. Because forgiveness 00:11:50.600 --> 00:11:54.740 doesn't mean the past didn't hurt, but it does 00:11:54.740 --> 00:11:59.940 mean the pain no longer has the final word. Now, 00:11:59.980 --> 00:12:02.740 here's where the text does something I think 00:12:02.740 --> 00:12:06.700 that'll preach if you let it. Jacob says to Esau, 00:12:07.659 --> 00:12:10.639 I have seen your face as one who sees the face 00:12:10.639 --> 00:12:14.080 of God, and you were pleased with me. Listen 00:12:14.080 --> 00:12:21.059 for that echo. Last night at the river, Jacob 00:12:21.059 --> 00:12:25.600 named the place Peniel. It means the face of 00:12:25.600 --> 00:12:30.940 God. He said, I've seen God face to face, and 00:12:30.940 --> 00:12:35.840 my life has been preserved. That was grace in 00:12:35.840 --> 00:12:40.639 the dark. Grace as wound. Grace that renamed 00:12:40.639 --> 00:12:45.340 him and cost him something. Now in the daylight, 00:12:45.639 --> 00:12:48.500 standing in front of the brother he has most 00:12:48.500 --> 00:12:53.279 assuredly wronged, Jacob sees that same face 00:12:53.279 --> 00:12:58.740 again. Grace comes twice. Grace in the dark as 00:12:58.740 --> 00:13:02.899 a wound that renames you. Grace in the light. 00:13:03.529 --> 00:13:08.389 as reconciliation that frees you. And that tells 00:13:08.389 --> 00:13:12.210 us something essential about how God actually 00:13:12.210 --> 00:13:17.250 works. Sometimes God meets you directly. Sometimes, 00:13:17.429 --> 00:13:22.110 friends, God meets you through the person you 00:13:22.110 --> 00:13:26.669 were afraid of. The night didn't prepare Jacob 00:13:26.669 --> 00:13:31.389 to win the meeting. It prepared him. to receive 00:13:31.389 --> 00:13:36.509 mercy without trying to control it. That's why 00:13:36.509 --> 00:13:40.409 he insists that Esau take the gift. Esau says, 00:13:40.610 --> 00:13:45.289 I have enough, my brother. And Jacob says, listen 00:13:45.289 --> 00:13:50.549 closely, friends, please let me give this not 00:13:50.549 --> 00:13:56.129 to buy peace, but because peace has already been 00:13:56.129 --> 00:14:00.509 given. Let me give it. Because I've seen your 00:14:00.509 --> 00:14:06.649 face and it looks like God's. It's not the man 00:14:06.649 --> 00:14:11.090 who traded Stu for a future. That's Israel now. 00:14:12.610 --> 00:14:16.049 So let's bring it home. Because some of us have 00:14:16.049 --> 00:14:20.110 already crossed the river. You've had the night. 00:14:20.250 --> 00:14:23.529 You've had the wrestling. You've told the truth 00:14:23.529 --> 00:14:26.590 about your name. And maybe you've been wounded 00:14:26.590 --> 00:14:30.210 in a way that didn't kill you. It certainly changed 00:14:30.210 --> 00:14:36.129 the way you walk. Now the sun is up. You can 00:14:36.129 --> 00:14:41.110 see what's coming. Apology that you don't know 00:14:41.110 --> 00:14:45.610 how to put words to yet. The relationship that 00:14:45.610 --> 00:14:50.690 just can't be managed anymore. The meeting that 00:14:50.690 --> 00:14:55.570 scares you more than the wrestling did. Some 00:14:55.570 --> 00:15:00.929 people you hurt. will not forgive you. Some bridges 00:15:00.929 --> 00:15:07.149 you burn will stay burned. Scripture, friends, 00:15:07.210 --> 00:15:11.129 is most assuredly honest about that. But grace 00:15:11.129 --> 00:15:15.850 doesn't guarantee outcomes. Grace guarantees 00:15:15.850 --> 00:15:20.070 presence. You don't have to meet them as the 00:15:20.070 --> 00:15:24.490 old version of yourself anymore. You can walk 00:15:24.490 --> 00:15:29.340 slower now, the limp. makes you. You can walk 00:15:29.340 --> 00:15:34.799 humbler now because the wound teaches you. And 00:15:34.799 --> 00:15:38.279 you can walk now without having to pretend you're 00:15:38.279 --> 00:15:42.980 bulletproof. And sometimes, not always, but sometimes, 00:15:43.299 --> 00:15:48.779 the thing you feared most turns out to be the 00:15:48.779 --> 00:15:53.000 place where mercy shows its face. Not because 00:15:53.000 --> 00:15:56.120 you earned it. not because you finally got it 00:15:56.120 --> 00:15:59.139 all put together, but because God went to work 00:15:59.139 --> 00:16:02.580 on you in the dark, and the work God does in 00:16:02.580 --> 00:16:09.259 the dark prepares you for the light. So, may 00:16:09.259 --> 00:16:12.620 the God of Isaac, Abraham, and Jacob, the God 00:16:12.620 --> 00:16:16.080 who is not afraid of complicated people, God 00:16:16.080 --> 00:16:19.480 who wrestles liars into truth -tellers, meet 00:16:19.480 --> 00:16:23.769 you on your side of the river tonight. May you 00:16:23.769 --> 00:16:26.909 cross into what's coming, not healed of every 00:16:26.909 --> 00:16:31.190 wound, but honest enough to finally stop pretending. 00:16:32.929 --> 00:16:36.690 May you bow without shame. May you walk forward 00:16:36.690 --> 00:16:39.750 without a script. May you recognize the face 00:16:39.750 --> 00:16:43.789 of God when mercy runs towards you in the daylight. 00:16:45.629 --> 00:16:51.309 And if you limp, and you will, may it be to limp. 00:16:51.679 --> 00:16:54.379 Of someone who has been held by God and will 00:16:54.379 --> 00:16:59.840 tell the truth about it. The sun is up. The river 00:16:59.840 --> 00:17:03.980 is behind you. The meeting is ahead. So walk 00:17:03.980 --> 00:17:13.160 on. Amen. Amen. Thanks, guys. I would not call 00:17:13.160 --> 00:17:25.309 that awesome. As we close tonight, I want you 00:17:25.309 --> 00:17:28.410 to sit with this. Race doesn't always cancel 00:17:28.410 --> 00:17:31.190 the consequences, but it does change the kind 00:17:31.190 --> 00:17:34.269 of person who shows up to face them. Jacob didn't 00:17:34.269 --> 00:17:37.069 cross the river healed. He crossed it honest. 00:17:37.609 --> 00:17:40.569 And sometimes that is the holiest way forward. 00:17:41.029 --> 00:17:43.430 So if you're carrying a limp, if you've got a 00:17:43.430 --> 00:17:45.549 meeting you can't manage or a past that still 00:17:45.549 --> 00:17:48.490 walks towards you, know this. You're not alone. 00:17:49.089 --> 00:17:51.829 And you don't have to be the old version of yourself 00:17:51.829 --> 00:17:55.380 anymore. Grace has gone to work on you in the 00:17:55.380 --> 00:17:59.319 dark, so let it walk with you in the light. And 00:17:59.319 --> 00:18:01.640 if something in tonight's word landed, if you 00:18:01.640 --> 00:18:04.279 heard something fresh, something that maybe made 00:18:04.279 --> 00:18:06.599 you sit up straighter or breathe a little deeper, 00:18:06.799 --> 00:18:09.480 go ahead and toss a like in the offering plate, 00:18:09.579 --> 00:18:11.599 just like we used to pass it down the queue. 00:18:11.700 --> 00:18:15.059 That's your way of saying, I'm here. I heard 00:18:15.059 --> 00:18:18.599 it. And if you'd like to keep walking with us 00:18:18.599 --> 00:18:21.079 into the new year, hit that subscribe button. 00:18:21.119 --> 00:18:24.319 That way, you'll know exactly when the church 00:18:24.319 --> 00:18:27.799 is gathering again. Until then, limp if you must, 00:18:28.000 --> 00:18:32.619 but walk on. And as always, be blessed.