WEBVTT

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Welcome to Don't Scare the Newbies, a podcast

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where we talk kink, raw... I've lost it again.

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I was doing so good. Welcome to Don't Scare the

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Newbies, a podcast where we talk kink, raw and

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unfiltered. I'm Carizal, a lifestyle submissive

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and a 24 -7 dynamic who likes their kink heavy,

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intense and scary. And I'm S, Carizal's dominant

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who knows how to deliver all of the above. And

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today we're going to be talking about impact

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play. Going to hit you with some hard truths.

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And some hard wood as well. Oh, yes. So, impact

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play. Yeah. It feels nuts that we've done over

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50 episodes and we've only just got around to

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this. Yes, it does. It does seem a little bit

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silly. Bit of an oversight on our part. Because

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I think it's safe to say this is one of the main

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things we do. Like most scenes we do involve

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some level of hitting. Yes, I do like to hit

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you with stuff. You do. Which for anyone not

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familiar with the term impact play, that is essentially

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what we're talking about today is hitting people

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with stuff. Yes. Or with your hands. Yeah. Hitting

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people with anything at all is what impact play

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is, in a consensual way. See you next time. Yes,

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that is basically it. And it's probably the most

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obvious or accessible version of kink that people

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see outside of kink spaces. Yeah, it's one of

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those things that a lot of people who consider

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themselves fairly vanilla will have probably

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experimented with a little bit of either spanking

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or face slapping are quite common ones that people...

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have a little dabble with yeah yeah it's like

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this idea that kind of bdsm is basically tying

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people up and hitting people with stuff yeah

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so we haven't done one on bondage no well we

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need to get a guest for that because we don't

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really do a lot of the tying people up stuff

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no no we don't it's too fiddly for me yeah i

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mean we do a lot of restraint we do a lot of

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things that fit within the bondage umbrella lots

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of handcuffs uh lots of sort of restraint sets

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yeah and i really like chains i really like being

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chained up that's one of my big things which

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is a form of bondage but yes i think if we're

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going to do a whole episode about bondage we

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need the people who know how to do the cool fiddly

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stuff with ropes to talk to us probably probably

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so keep an eye out for that at some point yeah

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in two years time But today we are talking about

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hitting people with stuff. Yes, we are. Let's

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not get off topic. Three minutes into the recording.

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Keep on track. On track. So I thought a good

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place to start would be where that started for

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us. Our early experiences with Impact Play. Because

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Impact Play is actually your kinky origin story,

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isn't it, Mix? Yes. Yes, kind of. I wasn't hitting

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people with stuff, but I was hitting people.

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People who have stuck around since the beginning

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will remember. I've said a couple of times my

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kind of kink origin story was a hookup one night

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when I was at university and the lovely young

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woman I was with said, if you want me to come,

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you're going to have to hit me. So I did with

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my hands on her butt and her face. Nice. Which

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was great fun. Yes. Did she cum mix? Yes. You

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look so offended. Very offended by that question.

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Never leave people unsatisfied. To be fair, I

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can confirm that. Bragging unnecessarily. I do

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not have a 100 % success rate, but not far off.

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Just to brag a little bit. I think that's fair.

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Yeah. So you hit her. You had a good time. I

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had a very good time. Yes. And didn't. really

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explore a lot further than what people might

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experience it like it's like you say who are

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relatively vanilla so not like getting really

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kind of deep into it just treating it as like

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oh yeah it's fun to slap people on the butt or

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relatively gently if i look back now i realize

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that what i may have considered at the time to

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be hitting someone quite hard really wasn't I

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think a lot of that change probably came when

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you met me, didn't it, Max? A good chunk of it,

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yeah. I think there was a lot of consciously,

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unconsciously, not really sure, holding back

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in that early period. Yeah. And then trying different

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things, trying different tools, getting more

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confident with that. I guess it got a little

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bit harder, got a little bit more imaginative

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with it. And then I met you and just started

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beating the shit out of you. Yeah. basically

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because you could take it yeah and actively encourage

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and actively encourage me to to be worse that

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is often i think my main role in this relationship

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is just making you worse yeah you're very not

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very much not a um i can i can fix them person

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i you know i can make them worse i can make them

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worse yeah um And yeah, it was just a fun thing

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to do. Like at that time in my life, it was just

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like, yeah, that's what you do if you want to

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spice things up a little bit. A little bit of

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slap and tickle kind of thing. But I really enjoyed

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it. And the people that I did it with really

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enjoyed it as well. It's just fun to be mean

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in it. Yeah. Definitely. I think that's probably

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as well as it being really accessible. I think

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that's part of why it's common is if people have

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a little bit of an interest in being a little

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bit mean. That's something that feels not like

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you're doing anything too intense or too crazy.

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It's not like you're cutting someone, piercing

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them, you know, doing the emotional sadism stuff

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that you've got into through, again, me making

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you worse. It's stuff that is, you know, surface

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level. If you're doing it relatively safely or

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relatively gently or ideally both, pretty harmless.

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Yeah. It's a good little, like, beginner's entry

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point into sadism. Yeah, definitely. And, you

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know, I shit on Love, Honey and Ann Summers and

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places like that. They do perfectly good tools

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and toys for that sort of thing. Reasonable quality,

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reasonable weight and design. They'll achieve

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what you want them to achieve. For that entry

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-level stuff, yeah. For that entry -level stuff.

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Yeah, definitely. And relatively cheap as well.

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I think as we will get on to, I think one of

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the great things about impact play is that you

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can spend an absolute fortune on things to hit

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people with, but you really don't have to. Yeah.

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But that's a bit of a spoiler, so stick around.

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We are going to get into all of the kit stuff.

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Like 20 minutes. But how about you? Where did

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it start with you? Quite a bit earlier, Mix.

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Well, quite a bit younger, chronologically speaking,

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probably still later due to your advanced years.

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Because I am very old, blah, blah, blah. Yeah.

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So I... Wouldn't have thought of myself as kinky

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until I was 16, and then thought of myself as

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kinky very briefly in a relationship that I was

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in then, and then stopped thinking of myself

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as kinky until I was 31. But in that very small

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window, when I was 16, I was involved with a

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guy who had, at the time it seemed like loads

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of experience with kink, and he was a year older

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than me and had probably been kinky for about

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six months, so actually it wasn't that much,

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but he knew how to hit somebody. So we did quite

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a lot of impact. But I think... Probably like

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you when you were young, there was quite an element

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of holding back with him. So I wasn't getting

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hit. as hard as i was immediately curious to

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uh so around that time i had a house party with

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a bunch of friends at my house and my mom had

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a riding crop that she didn't even ride anymore

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she hadn't ridden a horse for years but it was

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one she'd had like when she was in her 20s that

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she kept around the house and i got this riding

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crop out at about two in the morning when my

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parents had gone to bed drunk at this house party

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with my friends and i was like does everyone

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want to take turns hitting me with this and they

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did drunk teenagers like yeah that sounds like

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a good time yeah so all of these friends all

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took it in turns hitting me again and again and

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again across my back which is not a great spot

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to be hitting really hard with a riding crop

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that's not something i would recommend no um

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but i got bruises like I think I bruised easier

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when I was younger, but also alcohol really helps

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with that. And I had just like black all down

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my back. And then like going into school and

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getting changed for PE and things like that.

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And hanging around like at home and wearing strappy

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tops. Everyone was like, what the fuck has happened

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to your back? I was like, oh yeah, I just got

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drunk and we're like hitting each other. It's

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fine. Perfectly normal thing to do. Completely.

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I'm too fair for drunk teenagers. That probably

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is. They do dumb stuff. It's like the festival

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we were at last year. Last week, seen all the

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videos from, not last week in podcast time, last

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week in real time. Seen all the videos of teenagers

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like running at each other, holding airbeds and

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bouncing through the tents and stuff. That was,

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yeah, the airbed jousting thing was just brilliant.

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Only saw it on video. Would have probably had

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a different view of it if it was happening next

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to my tent. Yeah, we do not camp in 24 hour party

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people. We camp in the nice posh camping. It's

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relatively quiet there. Because I am not a 24

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hour party person. No, we go to bed at 11pm.

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Yeah, at a fucking festival. Yeah. See the headliner,

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go to bed. Yeah. The way it should be. So yeah,

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that was my awakening into Impact Play. But then

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that relationship turned out to be a bit of a

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shit show and it put me off kink for a... a while

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and i had loads of shame like at the time there

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were certain kinks of mine that i was ready to

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explore and certain i was like if anyone ever

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finds out i think about this in my brain i will

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simply die um so i wasn't ready to really deal

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with it yet for various reasons and that all

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just went back in the box so when i was 31 and

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i knew i wanted to start exploring kink i didn't

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know exactly how much of it i wanted to explore

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and what i'd be into and there were a lot of

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things i'm into now i hadn't even heard of but

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i knew i wanted to get hit that was straight

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away top of the list so i was saying to people

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i was hooking up with like i want rough sex i

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like my hair pulled i like choking because i

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didn't know any better then and i like being

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slapped around the face and spanked yeah let's

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see where we go from there um it was on my like

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beginner kink list yes and that's what we did

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wasn't it yeah when we first hooked up i hit

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you with a bunch of stuff yeah it was great including

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one that we now call the evil one yes because

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it is evil because it is evil but also a spiky

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paddle yes you were my introduction to blood

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play hurrah if you want to hear more about that

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go listen to the blood play episode yeah i made

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you worse you did mutually making each other

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worse is the best way to do kink i think yes

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i agree so after we just said it's always fun

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to be mean and we don't need to get too analytical

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about it let's get analytical about it oh wow

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what do you get from impact play mix um Impact

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play is a really funny one for me because I really

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enjoy it, but it's not one of the kinks that

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is particularly sexual for me. So we are a couple

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where the Venn diagram of kink and sex is maybe

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not a circle, but also not two separate circles.

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It's a weird one where it doesn't tap into that

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need for kind of... power or like control which

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is a feature of a lot of for me a feature of

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a lot of my kinks it genuinely is just something

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that's really fun to do like I enjoy because

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I'm a sadist I enjoy inflicting pain but I really

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like the I really enjoy the wide range of reactions

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that you get to it from person to person but

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also from thing to thing whether i'm using my

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hands whether i'm using something really heavy

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whether i'm using something really light and

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and whippy and awful and and awful so i don't

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get massively turned on by it i don't feel that

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kind of power trip i think it is there is there

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is obviously a really strong sadistic element

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to it if i enjoy consensually inflicting pain

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on other people that is just that is a fun thing

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to do which is a really weird thing to say out

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loud like it's it's fun in its own right and

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and just as it is quite satisfying quite yeah

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satisfying quite visceral i just like king people

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and i enjoy the response and and i think impact

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is one of those kink activities where you tailor

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it to the person yeah so you know we always say

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kink is not a competition brackets unless we're

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winning um but i You know, you've said to me

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on occasion, because you are used to taking a

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really big beating and properly getting the shit

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beat out of you. Yeah. But there are some days

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where your pain tolerance is lower. Yeah. You

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are able to withstand less. And we get to the

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end of a scene, either we finish maybe sooner

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than you would have liked or it's not quite as

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hard or heavy or intense as you would have wanted.

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And you say, oh, I feel like I'm being a pussy.

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Kind of thing. I feel like I'm... being really

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weak and not really taking very much but in from

00:13:49.340 --> 00:13:53.379
my perspective that's that's like the best outcome

00:13:53.379 --> 00:13:56.799
for an impact scene is you've taken as much as

00:13:56.799 --> 00:13:59.000
you can and now we're going to stop and i really

00:13:59.000 --> 00:14:04.440
like that that variability of of experience that

00:14:04.440 --> 00:14:05.980
you would have either with the same person over

00:14:05.980 --> 00:14:09.299
time or with different people because there are

00:14:09.299 --> 00:14:11.899
other people that i could hit them as hard as

00:14:11.899 --> 00:14:15.549
i hit you And they would immediately call red

00:14:15.549 --> 00:14:18.210
and run for the hills. Yeah. And there are probably

00:14:18.210 --> 00:14:20.830
other people that I could hit as hard as I hit

00:14:20.830 --> 00:14:23.330
you and would look at me with a smirk on their

00:14:23.330 --> 00:14:26.370
face going, is that all you've got? Yeah, probably.

00:14:26.629 --> 00:14:29.690
I really like that it gives you that option to

00:14:29.690 --> 00:14:32.429
safely and consensually kind of push someone

00:14:32.429 --> 00:14:34.350
in that way. You know, I have a habit of not

00:14:34.350 --> 00:14:36.169
giving you much of a warm up because I enjoy

00:14:36.169 --> 00:14:39.149
being particularly mean to you. Yeah. But that

00:14:39.149 --> 00:14:41.389
idea of ramping up over time, starting really

00:14:41.389 --> 00:14:44.279
gently, kind of building up, getting... harder

00:14:44.279 --> 00:14:46.620
or faster or using different things to the point

00:14:46.620 --> 00:14:49.100
where you can see they're just about at their

00:14:49.100 --> 00:14:52.059
at their limit and stop short of that i just

00:14:52.059 --> 00:14:54.340
really enjoy all of that it's a different experience

00:14:54.340 --> 00:14:58.220
every time yeah yeah it's weirdly satisfying

00:14:58.220 --> 00:15:01.059
thing to do no that makes a lot of sense definitely

00:15:01.059 --> 00:15:05.100
i would say i you say that impact isn't a particularly

00:15:05.100 --> 00:15:07.379
sexual thing for you i think if we set out to

00:15:07.379 --> 00:15:09.419
do impact or we set out to do impact and other

00:15:09.419 --> 00:15:11.159
stuff that isn't particularly sexual on its own

00:15:11.159 --> 00:15:15.820
for you That is true. If we are having sex, impact

00:15:15.820 --> 00:15:19.000
does seem to add quite a lot for you. There have

00:15:19.000 --> 00:15:21.240
been times when your penis was maybe being a

00:15:21.240 --> 00:15:23.919
little bit mischievous and not fully getting

00:15:23.919 --> 00:15:27.360
on board with the situation at hand. And you

00:15:27.360 --> 00:15:29.980
will just start punching and slapping me. And

00:15:29.980 --> 00:15:32.500
then suddenly it's like, ah, I see a sexy thing

00:15:32.500 --> 00:15:36.860
is happening. I will attend this function. Yeah,

00:15:36.919 --> 00:15:39.240
yeah, that's fair. I suppose I'm thinking about

00:15:39.240 --> 00:15:41.299
specifically a scene where we're going. right,

00:15:41.299 --> 00:15:43.539
we'll go upstairs and I will give you a big beating.

00:15:43.700 --> 00:15:47.039
Yeah. That's less likely to have that effect

00:15:47.039 --> 00:15:49.299
on me. Your penis is less likely to attend that

00:15:49.299 --> 00:15:51.840
function. Yeah. But if we're doing other stuff

00:15:51.840 --> 00:15:56.120
or in a CNC kind of context, because obviously

00:15:56.120 --> 00:15:58.360
when we're doing, when we're having CNC sex,

00:15:58.620 --> 00:16:00.980
we will also do impact because I will slap you

00:16:00.980 --> 00:16:03.419
around. Yeah. And sometimes I'll slap you around.

00:16:03.539 --> 00:16:08.639
And sometimes you'll slap me around. Yes. Or

00:16:08.639 --> 00:16:10.879
spit at you. I have discovered a great love for

00:16:10.879 --> 00:16:13.600
spitting at you. Yes. Which is interesting in

00:16:13.600 --> 00:16:16.620
itself and a completely different topic is I

00:16:16.620 --> 00:16:19.600
would have imagined before we started doing that

00:16:19.600 --> 00:16:21.100
kind of thing that that would be a bit of a turn

00:16:21.100 --> 00:16:24.960
off for me. Yeah. Like you really fighting back

00:16:24.960 --> 00:16:26.539
and hitting me and spitting at me and stuff like

00:16:26.539 --> 00:16:29.440
that. It's really not. I can tell it's not. Yeah,

00:16:29.500 --> 00:16:32.419
I can tell you like it. I get kind of mad about

00:16:32.419 --> 00:16:37.259
it, which feeds into that. Yeah. So yeah, I think

00:16:37.259 --> 00:16:39.820
that's a fair point. If it's part of a scene

00:16:39.820 --> 00:16:43.519
which has a slightly different focus, then yeah,

00:16:43.600 --> 00:16:45.259
sometimes it can be sexual, but I think it's

00:16:45.259 --> 00:16:48.039
that combination of things that does it for me.

00:16:48.120 --> 00:16:50.500
And weirdly meditative sometimes. I wondered

00:16:50.500 --> 00:16:52.139
that because it's often quite meditative for

00:16:52.139 --> 00:16:55.059
me, depending on how we're doing it. So I wondered

00:16:55.059 --> 00:16:56.860
if it was similar for you as well, because I

00:16:56.860 --> 00:16:59.340
can imagine it being quite calming, like a stress

00:16:59.340 --> 00:17:02.779
ball. Yeah, I think there is a little bit of

00:17:02.779 --> 00:17:04.500
that kind of working out the tension in the...

00:17:04.759 --> 00:17:07.940
in the muscles as well but particularly if we're

00:17:07.940 --> 00:17:09.960
doing i think it becomes a bit of a feedback

00:17:09.960 --> 00:17:12.920
loop like especially if we're doing a like a

00:17:12.920 --> 00:17:16.619
longer thuddier beating where you can just take

00:17:16.619 --> 00:17:21.720
it for hours and hours and hours um you do kind

00:17:21.720 --> 00:17:24.119
of get into that rhythm a little bit and i don't

00:17:24.119 --> 00:17:27.880
you know i don't notice kind of time passing

00:17:27.880 --> 00:17:31.920
and i think having to kind of be conscious about

00:17:33.579 --> 00:17:36.460
where you're hitting as well so like making sure

00:17:36.460 --> 00:17:38.180
that i'm staying in the in the good zone helps

00:17:38.180 --> 00:17:40.240
with that kind of focus as well so maybe for

00:17:40.240 --> 00:17:43.240
different reasons to you but becomes quite meditative

00:17:43.240 --> 00:17:45.880
as well well what about you what do you get from

00:17:45.880 --> 00:17:49.759
it you weird little masochist yeah i imagine

00:17:49.759 --> 00:17:51.160
this is the bit that's hard for you to get your

00:17:51.160 --> 00:17:52.539
head around because i know sometimes when you

00:17:52.539 --> 00:17:55.160
get a new toy you'll hit yourself with it then

00:17:55.160 --> 00:17:57.519
be like ow ow that really hurts that's awful

00:17:57.519 --> 00:18:00.029
who would do that and i'm like me I would want

00:18:00.029 --> 00:18:03.930
that. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. I always mock you for

00:18:03.930 --> 00:18:05.970
it as well because you're such not a masochist.

00:18:05.970 --> 00:18:07.609
You always have such a strong reaction. I am.

00:18:08.190 --> 00:18:12.539
So. Yeah, I would be so dull for an impact top,

00:18:12.660 --> 00:18:14.380
I think. I would just nope out really, really

00:18:14.380 --> 00:18:16.940
quickly. Oh yes, hit me with your feather flogger.

00:18:17.319 --> 00:18:20.700
Would be about my limit, I think. Yeah. So I

00:18:20.700 --> 00:18:22.519
like different kinds of impact in different ways.

00:18:22.640 --> 00:18:25.579
A lot of it is sexual for me. Even the stuff

00:18:25.579 --> 00:18:27.400
that doesn't really feel sexual, I'll quite often

00:18:27.400 --> 00:18:29.099
afterwards realise I'm really physically turned

00:18:29.099 --> 00:18:31.619
on. So I haven't necessarily gone into a sexy

00:18:31.619 --> 00:18:33.039
headspace, but then afterwards I'll be like,

00:18:33.140 --> 00:18:38.619
why am I wet? How did this occur? But... Different

00:18:38.619 --> 00:18:40.319
kinds of impact definitely meet different needs.

00:18:40.519 --> 00:18:43.420
So spanking, like barehanded spanking, especially

00:18:43.420 --> 00:18:46.359
over the knee spanking is like an instant subspace

00:18:46.359 --> 00:18:49.359
trigger. I just drop straight into subspace,

00:18:49.359 --> 00:18:52.180
really deep, go really floaty, feel like really

00:18:52.180 --> 00:18:54.140
intimate and loved up. It's such a nice headspace.

00:18:54.880 --> 00:18:58.059
And that one's quite a sexual one as well. Like

00:18:58.059 --> 00:19:00.480
the sensation of that is a massive turn on for

00:19:00.480 --> 00:19:04.140
me. I think it's just like physically it will

00:19:04.140 --> 00:19:05.779
do that. If you're spanking someone on the butt

00:19:05.779 --> 00:19:08.470
when they're... like they've got bare butt and

00:19:08.470 --> 00:19:10.069
you're using your hand and you're hitting like

00:19:10.069 --> 00:19:11.789
the lower part of the butt you're sort of pushing

00:19:11.789 --> 00:19:15.950
vibrations like into the the genital area you're

00:19:15.950 --> 00:19:17.509
bringing blood to the surface everything's getting

00:19:17.509 --> 00:19:19.250
more sensitive like i think that's why spanking

00:19:19.250 --> 00:19:21.690
is really commonly a sexy one and it definitely

00:19:21.690 --> 00:19:24.609
is for me yeah um is it the is there an element

00:19:24.609 --> 00:19:26.309
of it because that's probably the most physically

00:19:26.309 --> 00:19:29.069
intimate version of impact we do as well like

00:19:29.069 --> 00:19:30.609
unless you're doing it as part of like a really

00:19:30.609 --> 00:19:34.289
rough cnc scene But if we do other types of impact,

00:19:34.430 --> 00:19:36.869
you're usually lying on the bed or lying on something

00:19:36.869 --> 00:19:38.769
and I'm kneeling or standing next to you. Whereas

00:19:38.769 --> 00:19:40.910
with spanking, you are usually across my knee.

00:19:41.289 --> 00:19:43.589
Yeah, I think that's definitely a part of it.

00:19:44.029 --> 00:19:46.329
So that one, just the whole combination of everything

00:19:46.329 --> 00:19:49.589
with it is just really nice. We've talked a little

00:19:49.589 --> 00:19:52.269
bit about like thuddy versus stingy. So the kind

00:19:52.269 --> 00:19:54.529
of different types of pain that I think of, I

00:19:54.529 --> 00:19:56.109
branch out a little bit more from just thud and

00:19:56.109 --> 00:19:58.970
sting. There's thuddy, which is things like...

00:19:59.349 --> 00:20:01.990
hammers clubs sort of if you think about like

00:20:01.990 --> 00:20:04.410
hard heavy objects without a lot of flat surfaces

00:20:04.410 --> 00:20:07.190
that's your thuddy impact and that feels like

00:20:07.190 --> 00:20:10.269
a punch it's a deep sort of quite a warm feeling

00:20:10.269 --> 00:20:13.670
pain um there is stingy which is things like

00:20:13.670 --> 00:20:18.230
whips and canes are stingy so thin quite a sharp

00:20:18.230 --> 00:20:20.289
pain some people describe it as cold or it can

00:20:20.289 --> 00:20:24.390
feel like very hot pain um sort of more like

00:20:25.289 --> 00:20:27.930
if you have ever accidentally like snapped an

00:20:27.930 --> 00:20:29.630
elastic band and got yourself with it that's

00:20:29.630 --> 00:20:32.589
stingy pain uh slappy which a lot of people lump

00:20:32.589 --> 00:20:34.369
in with stingy but i definitely feel them as

00:20:34.369 --> 00:20:37.150
two very different things is like the flat side

00:20:37.150 --> 00:20:39.809
of a fairly lightweight paddle flat side of any

00:20:39.809 --> 00:20:41.890
paddle will be slappy but the more the more light

00:20:41.890 --> 00:20:43.990
it is the worse that is the more slap comes through

00:20:43.990 --> 00:20:45.970
and overpowers any thud that there might be from

00:20:45.970 --> 00:20:49.339
the weight um and that's like being slapped um

00:20:49.339 --> 00:20:51.740
and the reason i separate that out from stingy

00:20:51.740 --> 00:20:53.700
is partly because of a really good impact play

00:20:53.700 --> 00:20:55.400
talk we went to that actually explained the difference

00:20:55.400 --> 00:20:57.019
and i was like oh shit yeah there is a difference

00:20:57.019 --> 00:20:59.460
but also because i used to really struggle with

00:20:59.460 --> 00:21:01.660
explaining to people before that that i like

00:21:01.660 --> 00:21:03.619
some stingy and not other stingy and what i like

00:21:03.619 --> 00:21:06.180
is stingy and what i don't like is slappy um

00:21:06.180 --> 00:21:09.119
so slappy is really hard for me to take stingy

00:21:09.119 --> 00:21:11.779
the right kind of sting can be really good i

00:21:11.779 --> 00:21:16.950
love caning um so stingy like cane sort of stingy

00:21:16.950 --> 00:21:19.829
impact is one where at first it's really hard

00:21:19.829 --> 00:21:21.670
to take but once i'm warmed up if i either have

00:21:21.670 --> 00:21:23.650
a good warm -up before it or you start gently

00:21:23.650 --> 00:21:26.069
with the cane and then ramp up that one's a really

00:21:26.069 --> 00:21:27.990
meditative one for me where the pain becomes

00:21:27.990 --> 00:21:31.910
almost like a like a mantra it's like a focal

00:21:31.910 --> 00:21:35.450
point and it takes me to a really nice like it's

00:21:35.450 --> 00:21:37.470
a subspace where i feel like i'm going up instead

00:21:37.470 --> 00:21:40.839
of dropping down if that makes sense um like

00:21:40.839 --> 00:21:43.420
like my mind is expanding it's really cool yeah

00:21:43.420 --> 00:21:47.859
um slappy impact i say i hate it but i like doing

00:21:47.859 --> 00:21:50.059
stuff i hate so that's like if i want to suffer

00:21:50.059 --> 00:21:52.400
we're doing a lot of slappy stuff so more like

00:21:52.400 --> 00:21:54.619
the rubber whip some more slap than sting they've

00:21:54.619 --> 00:21:56.339
got a sting to them as well but they've got a

00:21:56.339 --> 00:21:59.859
slappiness right flat paddles um like technically

00:21:59.859 --> 00:22:01.900
speaking spanking would come under slappy as

00:22:01.900 --> 00:22:05.240
well but it's it's a more gentle slappy so that's

00:22:05.240 --> 00:22:09.109
good yeah um and then the final one for me is

00:22:09.109 --> 00:22:11.670
uh bloody impact which i think of as like warm

00:22:11.670 --> 00:22:14.490
impact because of the the breaking of the skin

00:22:14.490 --> 00:22:17.109
it becomes really really warm and tingly and

00:22:17.109 --> 00:22:19.089
that can be either really pleasurable or really

00:22:19.089 --> 00:22:20.910
painful depending on where my pain threshold's

00:22:20.910 --> 00:22:22.589
at how much warm -up i've had how hard we're

00:22:22.589 --> 00:22:25.490
doing it but either way that feels a lot more

00:22:25.490 --> 00:22:29.069
primal it's it awakens something like i am being

00:22:29.069 --> 00:22:30.930
wounded even though they're tiny tiny little

00:22:30.930 --> 00:22:34.630
wounds and that brings on a more I don't know

00:22:34.630 --> 00:22:36.089
how to describe it, just a different headspace

00:22:36.089 --> 00:22:39.369
again. But all of them can be sexual for me in

00:22:39.369 --> 00:22:42.329
a sexual context. None of them are ever completely

00:22:42.329 --> 00:22:46.230
non -sexual, I think, from my perspective. But

00:22:46.230 --> 00:22:48.369
they don't necessarily have to lead to sex or

00:22:48.369 --> 00:22:50.809
involve sexual contact. Like if they are sort

00:22:50.809 --> 00:22:52.930
of part of foreplay or part of a scene where

00:22:52.930 --> 00:22:54.589
the sexual stuff going on as well, that's awesome.

00:22:54.769 --> 00:22:57.190
But it's just as satisfying to just get hit a

00:22:57.190 --> 00:22:58.950
whole bunch and then be a little bit horny afterwards.

00:22:59.670 --> 00:23:03.079
That's great. Yeah. And it's interesting you

00:23:03.079 --> 00:23:05.839
talk about bloody impact. I think that's probably

00:23:05.839 --> 00:23:08.319
the most sexual for me. Yeah. Probably for the

00:23:08.319 --> 00:23:11.059
same reason as you. It's a little bit more primal

00:23:11.059 --> 00:23:14.599
and really visual as well. Yeah. Like immediately

00:23:14.599 --> 00:23:21.279
visual. Yeah. But I'm curious about the way that

00:23:21.279 --> 00:23:25.140
you respond to the different types of impact

00:23:25.140 --> 00:23:29.099
that we do. Because with my perception of it

00:23:29.099 --> 00:23:35.500
is that with... the heavy impact tools you can

00:23:35.500 --> 00:23:41.000
just kind of float away yeah and and just you

00:23:41.000 --> 00:23:44.079
get to that point where you you're not really

00:23:44.079 --> 00:23:48.640
responsive to what i'm doing yeah thuddy is the

00:23:48.640 --> 00:23:51.059
most relaxing and meditative kind of impact play

00:23:51.059 --> 00:23:54.240
for me um with any kind of impact you know i've

00:23:54.240 --> 00:23:56.059
mentioned we've both mentioned warm -ups a couple

00:23:56.059 --> 00:23:58.960
of times so the sort of the way that i would

00:23:58.960 --> 00:24:01.220
recommend a beginner or someone with a new partner

00:24:01.220 --> 00:24:03.420
to do impact definitely is start with like a

00:24:03.420 --> 00:24:05.240
gentle spanking and then you work up to a bit

00:24:05.240 --> 00:24:06.960
of a harder spanking and then you use some of

00:24:06.960 --> 00:24:08.519
the toys that are quite nice that you know the

00:24:08.519 --> 00:24:12.640
bottom enjoys at a light intensity and gradually

00:24:12.640 --> 00:24:14.799
ramp up and it sort of gets the blood flowing

00:24:14.799 --> 00:24:17.079
gets a little bit color into the skin and gets

00:24:17.079 --> 00:24:18.759
people mentally adjusted to the fact they're

00:24:18.759 --> 00:24:20.519
getting hit as well because however much you

00:24:20.519 --> 00:24:23.160
like it there's still We have natural instincts

00:24:23.160 --> 00:24:25.240
to try to avoid being in pain, so when someone

00:24:25.240 --> 00:24:26.740
starts hitting you there's a little bit of a

00:24:26.740 --> 00:24:29.240
natural panic response that happens, so a warm

00:24:29.240 --> 00:24:31.619
-up can kind of ease you past some of that before

00:24:31.619 --> 00:24:34.079
you... start hitting someone really hard we often

00:24:34.079 --> 00:24:36.220
play with very little or no warm -up because

00:24:36.220 --> 00:24:38.319
i like to suffer and you like to be really mean

00:24:38.319 --> 00:24:42.900
um so if you start thuddy impact and i'm not

00:24:42.900 --> 00:24:45.819
warmed up i will still kind of wriggle and squeak

00:24:45.819 --> 00:24:48.099
and struggle with it a little bit but it doesn't

00:24:48.099 --> 00:24:49.720
take me very long at all to get through that

00:24:49.720 --> 00:24:51.660
stage even with no warm -up at all even if you're

00:24:51.660 --> 00:24:53.960
really going for it because it's such a pleasurable

00:24:53.960 --> 00:24:57.079
feeling for me and then the combination of the

00:24:57.079 --> 00:25:00.789
pleasure the rhythm of it the subspace kicking

00:25:00.789 --> 00:25:02.990
in where i'm feeling like because because i'm

00:25:02.990 --> 00:25:05.170
your submissive as well as being a masochist

00:25:05.170 --> 00:25:08.470
doing that with you feels like doing that for

00:25:08.470 --> 00:25:10.630
you feels like an act of submission even if not

00:25:10.630 --> 00:25:13.109
consciously bringing in any power play yeah so

00:25:13.109 --> 00:25:15.490
all of those things start to blur together and

00:25:15.490 --> 00:25:17.230
i just kind of drift off into it and it sometimes

00:25:17.230 --> 00:25:19.289
doesn't take long at all if you're hitting me

00:25:19.289 --> 00:25:21.710
at kind of middle intensity in quite a rhythmic

00:25:21.710 --> 00:25:24.650
way only using stuff that i like i'm just gonna

00:25:24.650 --> 00:25:27.589
float off into space and it's amazing yeah yeah

00:25:27.589 --> 00:25:30.500
yes And sometimes I have to snap you out of it.

00:25:30.759 --> 00:25:33.619
You don't have to snap me out of it, Mix. You

00:25:33.619 --> 00:25:35.720
like to snap me out of it because you're a mean,

00:25:35.799 --> 00:25:42.220
mean sadist. I mean, yes. But there is, in my

00:25:42.220 --> 00:25:47.319
defence, there is also a mild safety aspect to

00:25:47.319 --> 00:25:49.980
it as well. Making sure that you aren't so far

00:25:49.980 --> 00:25:52.680
gone that I could start... stabbing you and you

00:25:52.680 --> 00:25:55.359
wouldn't notice yeah but i think the fact that

00:25:55.359 --> 00:25:57.299
you can snap me out of it probably proves that

00:25:57.299 --> 00:26:00.279
i'm never that far gone no because that was when

00:26:00.279 --> 00:26:01.740
me and hope were together that was a concern

00:26:01.740 --> 00:26:03.680
she had once i got to that floaty stage she would

00:26:03.680 --> 00:26:05.220
be like okay now it's time to wrap things up

00:26:05.220 --> 00:26:07.339
because if i do something wrong and injure you

00:26:07.339 --> 00:26:08.799
i don't know if you're going to actually be able

00:26:08.799 --> 00:26:11.839
to respond to tell me yeah um but what you found

00:26:11.839 --> 00:26:14.240
through experimentation is that if you swap from

00:26:14.240 --> 00:26:15.779
hitting me with some nice study thing that i'm

00:26:15.779 --> 00:26:18.180
really enjoying to giving me a big whack with

00:26:18.180 --> 00:26:21.170
a rubber whip i will Become responsive again

00:26:21.170 --> 00:26:26.009
very quickly. Yeah. Yeah. It is a good temperature

00:26:26.009 --> 00:26:28.630
check of if I hit you with something that I know

00:26:28.630 --> 00:26:31.970
usually elicits the kind of response that I like

00:26:31.970 --> 00:26:35.829
to see. But I know you're okay. Yeah. Kind of

00:26:35.829 --> 00:26:37.849
thing. You are still capable of responding to

00:26:37.849 --> 00:26:40.250
something going wrong. Yeah. I still think you

00:26:40.250 --> 00:26:42.430
just do it to be mean. I mean, I also do it to

00:26:42.430 --> 00:26:44.589
be mean. I'm not saying, I'm not denying that.

00:26:45.369 --> 00:26:49.609
But it serves two purposes. That's fair. It's

00:26:49.609 --> 00:26:52.049
sometimes fun when you try to snap me out of

00:26:52.049 --> 00:26:54.789
it and you can't straight away. Like, you can

00:26:54.789 --> 00:26:56.769
tell that I'm okay, but there's been times where

00:26:56.769 --> 00:26:58.529
you would hit me really hard with something really

00:26:58.529 --> 00:27:00.490
slappy and I'll just sort of lie there and giggle

00:27:00.490 --> 00:27:02.750
at you. Yeah, yeah. And you're like, oh, that's

00:27:02.750 --> 00:27:04.690
not working. And then you'll hit me with something

00:27:04.690 --> 00:27:06.750
a bit worse and I'm like, hee, hee, hee. Yeah,

00:27:06.750 --> 00:27:08.549
yeah. Oh my God, that's not working. And then

00:27:08.549 --> 00:27:10.190
you get something awful and then I'm like, ah,

00:27:10.210 --> 00:27:13.549
ah. And you're like, okay, it does work. Yes,

00:27:13.589 --> 00:27:16.789
yes, yes. Yeah, you do sometimes go quite giggly.

00:27:16.990 --> 00:27:20.079
Yeah. um either completely silent or i just get

00:27:20.079 --> 00:27:23.680
the giggles yeah yeah and i have to work quite

00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:25.880
hard to get you back to making the noises that

00:27:25.880 --> 00:27:30.859
i that i enjoy yeah i don't always do that sometimes

00:27:30.859 --> 00:27:32.799
i do just give you the big thuddy beating that

00:27:32.799 --> 00:27:35.720
you that you like yeah usually like if i've had

00:27:35.720 --> 00:27:37.740
like a really stressful day and i've asked for

00:27:37.740 --> 00:27:40.460
a big thuddy beating to cheer me up you do just

00:27:40.460 --> 00:27:43.069
let me go into that space and stay there Yeah.

00:27:43.410 --> 00:27:45.329
You might still try to snap me out of it with

00:27:45.329 --> 00:27:47.730
the occasional like extra hard wag, but you won't.

00:27:47.990 --> 00:27:50.930
You won't pick up the evil one, for example,

00:27:51.049 --> 00:27:53.109
or one of the rubber whips. No. You'll let me

00:27:53.109 --> 00:27:55.490
have a nice time. No, I will. I will. So I thought

00:27:55.490 --> 00:27:59.529
we should talk about some equipment. Oh, yes.

00:28:00.009 --> 00:28:01.930
So by the time this comes out, this is going

00:28:01.930 --> 00:28:03.150
to be a surprise for you. You're about to look

00:28:03.150 --> 00:28:04.930
baffled. There will be a video on our Patreon

00:28:04.930 --> 00:28:08.970
of a little tour of some of our kit. Will there?

00:28:09.289 --> 00:28:12.009
Yes, Mix. Someone requested it last month when

00:28:12.009 --> 00:28:14.650
we did the bonus episode. Right. And I promised

00:28:14.650 --> 00:28:17.170
I would do it. Okay. So that is on my to -do

00:28:17.170 --> 00:28:19.250
list this week. So by the time this episode comes

00:28:19.250 --> 00:28:22.569
out, it will be on Patreon. Ah, nice. So if anyone

00:28:22.569 --> 00:28:24.650
wants to have a little nosy at not just the impact

00:28:24.650 --> 00:28:26.269
stuff we have, though that'll probably be most

00:28:26.269 --> 00:28:29.309
of it, but all of the weird and wonderful things

00:28:29.309 --> 00:28:31.569
we have. I used to do like toy box tours quite

00:28:31.569 --> 00:28:34.210
regularly on TikTok back in the day. Right. I

00:28:34.210 --> 00:28:36.690
had a lot less kit to show off, but also TikTok

00:28:36.690 --> 00:28:39.549
was a lot less. arsey about showing things like

00:28:39.549 --> 00:28:41.890
that back then and last time i tried to show

00:28:41.890 --> 00:28:44.250
off a toy on tiktok i got a community guidelines

00:28:44.250 --> 00:28:46.509
violation so i don't do that anymore but i can

00:28:46.509 --> 00:28:48.670
do it on patreon yeah you do it like on patreon

00:28:48.670 --> 00:28:50.750
you can do quite a lot on patreon yeah like the

00:28:50.750 --> 00:28:55.779
wild west over there But we are going to be just

00:28:55.779 --> 00:28:58.400
verbally talking about some kit today. So I thought

00:28:58.400 --> 00:29:00.180
I would start off by going through what I consider

00:29:00.180 --> 00:29:02.420
the five levels of kink equipment. This is a

00:29:02.420 --> 00:29:04.240
little system I came up with for classifying

00:29:04.240 --> 00:29:06.900
out how unhinged things are a while ago. And

00:29:06.900 --> 00:29:09.339
it's not just for impact play, but you can get

00:29:09.339 --> 00:29:12.240
impact toys in, I would say, the first four levels

00:29:12.240 --> 00:29:16.769
of this. um so level one is sex shops so that's

00:29:16.769 --> 00:29:18.890
your ann summers you love honey but also like

00:29:18.890 --> 00:29:21.490
actual physical sex shops you can find quality

00:29:21.490 --> 00:29:23.549
can be a little bit variable but everything in

00:29:23.549 --> 00:29:26.730
there very much definitely looks like a normal

00:29:27.319 --> 00:29:29.220
kink piece of equipment that you would expect

00:29:29.220 --> 00:29:31.759
so with impact toys you're going to find paddles

00:29:31.759 --> 00:29:33.599
you're going to find crops you might find some

00:29:33.599 --> 00:29:36.460
canes yep you might potentially find some whips

00:29:36.460 --> 00:29:38.059
but it's a bit less common because whips are

00:29:38.059 --> 00:29:39.640
a bit spicy for most people who are shopping

00:29:39.640 --> 00:29:41.740
at that level um but you'll find things that

00:29:41.740 --> 00:29:43.779
you look at and immediately go i know what that's

00:29:43.779 --> 00:29:46.460
for and how you hit somebody with it yep you've

00:29:46.460 --> 00:29:49.460
then got actual kink suppliers so that'd be websites

00:29:49.460 --> 00:29:53.670
like bondara for example where they only or primarily

00:29:53.670 --> 00:29:56.150
sell stuff that is actually for doing kink it's

00:29:56.150 --> 00:29:57.890
not just a generalized sex shop that has a little

00:29:57.890 --> 00:30:01.029
bit of a black leather section um and that will

00:30:01.029 --> 00:30:02.789
generally be a little bit better made and you

00:30:02.789 --> 00:30:04.569
might see a few more slightly unusual things

00:30:04.569 --> 00:30:07.049
you'll definitely find whips there you'll find

00:30:07.049 --> 00:30:09.009
sort of slightly more interesting paddles and

00:30:09.009 --> 00:30:12.769
floggers and i got a chain flogger from it was

00:30:12.769 --> 00:30:15.009
a sex shop but it was a kink specific sex shop

00:30:15.009 --> 00:30:18.329
um and that was like definitely a bit more edgy

00:30:18.329 --> 00:30:20.130
than what you would find in in your handsomers

00:30:20.130 --> 00:30:22.069
and love honey type places yeah and websites

00:30:22.069 --> 00:30:24.930
like uber kinky and yes sinful and places like

00:30:24.930 --> 00:30:27.430
that yeah so you'll have a bigger range a little

00:30:27.430 --> 00:30:29.710
bit more specialized but still all stuff where

00:30:29.710 --> 00:30:31.390
you can look at it and immediately know what

00:30:31.390 --> 00:30:34.480
you do with it yeah Then you've got your specialist

00:30:34.480 --> 00:30:37.339
kink makers. So that's the independent businesses

00:30:37.339 --> 00:30:39.559
that you'll find trading at kink markets. You'll

00:30:39.559 --> 00:30:41.900
find on places like Etsy. You'll find a lot through

00:30:41.900 --> 00:30:43.960
FetLife as well. A lot of people already promote

00:30:43.960 --> 00:30:46.819
stuff on there. So we've talked about a couple

00:30:46.819 --> 00:30:49.119
of paddles we've got from Venator Customs, which

00:30:49.119 --> 00:30:52.460
is a very specialist kink maker. He does very,

00:30:52.539 --> 00:30:54.980
very limited batches of toys, usually a couple

00:30:54.980 --> 00:30:56.859
of times a year, and they sell out in about five

00:30:56.859 --> 00:31:00.059
minutes. Really hard to get hold of. slightly

00:31:00.059 --> 00:31:01.980
less difficult to get hold of than that we've

00:31:01.980 --> 00:31:04.319
got people like mav's toy box who i believe might

00:31:04.319 --> 00:31:06.259
have mentioned on patreon not on here but fuck

00:31:06.259 --> 00:31:09.039
it shout out to mav um because mav has made the

00:31:09.039 --> 00:31:12.259
worst thing that i've ever been hit with um and

00:31:12.259 --> 00:31:15.799
there are a lot of places like that like your

00:31:15.799 --> 00:31:18.019
local area will have like the ones that are known

00:31:18.019 --> 00:31:20.460
in your area local kink markets to you will have

00:31:20.460 --> 00:31:22.740
the ones that are really good for you and again

00:31:22.740 --> 00:31:24.759
it'll generally be stuff you more or less can

00:31:24.759 --> 00:31:26.200
look at and see what it's for but you'll see

00:31:26.200 --> 00:31:28.819
some more weird and wonderful stuff there i often

00:31:28.839 --> 00:31:31.480
and think about that ridiculous like five foot

00:31:31.480 --> 00:31:33.420
long thing that looked like a big wooden sword

00:31:33.420 --> 00:31:36.259
that we saw at the BBB once. Yes. I was like,

00:31:36.319 --> 00:31:37.819
oh my God, I want that. And you were like, no,

00:31:37.940 --> 00:31:40.359
I am not strong enough to pick that up. I'm not

00:31:40.359 --> 00:31:44.180
hitting you with it. Yeah. It's all stuff that

00:31:44.180 --> 00:31:46.839
is even to a relatively untrained eye. You can

00:31:46.839 --> 00:31:49.240
kind of tell what it is. It's really well made,

00:31:49.279 --> 00:31:51.259
but it's also kind of quite interesting takes

00:31:51.259 --> 00:31:54.160
on some of it. So Mav, who we just mentioned,

00:31:54.339 --> 00:31:58.789
makes a lot of toys with like fire hose. Yeah.

00:31:59.750 --> 00:32:02.710
You know, kind of fire hose paddles and... You

00:32:02.710 --> 00:32:04.390
keep threatening to buy one of those. I am not

00:32:04.390 --> 00:32:07.009
looking forward to it. Yeah. I think it was Mav

00:32:07.009 --> 00:32:13.130
who made the boot sole thing that we've got.

00:32:13.349 --> 00:32:16.670
Yes, the boot sole on a paddle is from Mav's

00:32:16.670 --> 00:32:18.730
toy box. I really like that. It's got a bit of

00:32:18.730 --> 00:32:20.369
slap to it, but if I'm warmed up, it's mostly

00:32:20.369 --> 00:32:23.190
thud. It's really nice. Yeah. And what was the

00:32:23.190 --> 00:32:26.769
thing that he made where it was massive? It was

00:32:26.769 --> 00:32:29.269
like something you would see on fucking gladiators.

00:32:30.029 --> 00:32:33.089
But it was like a big plastic tube and he'd filled

00:32:33.089 --> 00:32:36.710
it with that expanding foam. Yeah. I can't remember

00:32:36.710 --> 00:32:38.849
what the tubes are, like some sort of gym equipment,

00:32:38.970 --> 00:32:41.869
I think. Possibly. It was ridiculous. Yeah. But

00:32:41.869 --> 00:32:44.569
it was absolutely huge. Yeah, he was selling

00:32:44.569 --> 00:32:46.170
some at an event and people were just buying

00:32:46.170 --> 00:32:47.670
them and wandering around whacking each other

00:32:47.670 --> 00:32:49.569
with them. Yeah, yeah. Absolutely brilliant.

00:32:51.379 --> 00:32:53.799
so yeah you find stuff there that you'll find

00:32:53.799 --> 00:32:55.900
through like kink markets and and sellers through

00:32:55.900 --> 00:32:58.859
etsy and fetlife will often be more specialized

00:32:58.859 --> 00:33:01.339
usually a little bit more expensive sometimes

00:33:01.339 --> 00:33:03.480
a lot more expensive but really good quality

00:33:03.480 --> 00:33:05.660
and especially if you're buying at markets you

00:33:05.660 --> 00:33:07.160
get to get really hands -on with stuff as well

00:33:07.160 --> 00:33:09.140
so if a toy is 300 pound you get to pick it up

00:33:09.140 --> 00:33:11.099
and see if it feels like 300 pound worth of toy

00:33:11.099 --> 00:33:13.039
rather than just placing an order and hoping

00:33:13.039 --> 00:33:16.259
it's decent quality when it turns up And not

00:33:16.259 --> 00:33:18.059
everything is expensive. A lot of the time it

00:33:18.059 --> 00:33:19.859
depends on the materials. It depends on how labor

00:33:19.859 --> 00:33:21.920
intensive it is to make. Sometimes it might just

00:33:21.920 --> 00:33:24.000
be like a really clever idea that no one's done

00:33:24.000 --> 00:33:26.359
before, but it's made out of cheap materials

00:33:26.359 --> 00:33:27.819
and they can do it in 10 minutes. So you pick

00:33:27.819 --> 00:33:29.960
it up for next to nothing. Yeah. I mean, one

00:33:29.960 --> 00:33:31.380
of your favorite things that you picked up from

00:33:31.380 --> 00:33:32.940
a kink market was a little strip of rubber that

00:33:32.940 --> 00:33:35.359
cost two pounds. Yes. And you've made my life

00:33:35.359 --> 00:33:38.279
hell with it ever since. Yes. Literally like

00:33:38.279 --> 00:33:42.859
inch and a half by six inches of rubber. And

00:33:42.859 --> 00:33:47.539
it was, yeah. fucking hated yeah yeah something

00:33:47.539 --> 00:33:49.180
i tossed in the bag while we were buying something

00:33:49.180 --> 00:33:51.700
that was significantly more expensive yeah than

00:33:51.700 --> 00:33:55.119
that but yeah well that was at the birmingham

00:33:55.119 --> 00:33:57.440
bizarre bizarre it was yes mix which is an amazing

00:33:57.440 --> 00:33:59.720
place yes if people get a chance to go there

00:33:59.720 --> 00:34:01.460
we definitely recommend that we always spend

00:34:01.460 --> 00:34:03.759
way more than we intended to when we go yeah

00:34:03.759 --> 00:34:06.539
but it's so worth it and again it's that hands

00:34:06.539 --> 00:34:08.969
-on experience of getting to to get your hands

00:34:08.969 --> 00:34:11.570
in the stuff and be like oh yeah i could i could

00:34:11.570 --> 00:34:13.050
hit someone with that or i could get hit with

00:34:13.050 --> 00:34:16.610
that and it'd be awesome yeah um but then the

00:34:16.610 --> 00:34:19.449
next level is buying kink stuff from places that

00:34:19.449 --> 00:34:23.710
are not for kink or sex at all um so that is

00:34:23.710 --> 00:34:27.489
your kitchen utensils that is your hardware shops

00:34:27.489 --> 00:34:29.949
that is your equestrian suppliers your farming

00:34:29.949 --> 00:34:33.150
suppliers um all of those kind of places i am

00:34:33.150 --> 00:34:36.090
an absolute menace for doing this i'm like we

00:34:36.090 --> 00:34:38.139
need to go to ikea to get piece of furniture

00:34:38.139 --> 00:34:42.139
and then we just go crazy in the the kitchenware

00:34:42.139 --> 00:34:44.460
section picking up all the different spoons and

00:34:44.460 --> 00:34:46.159
having a feel of them and saying hmm would this

00:34:46.159 --> 00:34:48.480
be any good would this be good yeah yeah and

00:34:48.480 --> 00:34:50.179
you can get really creative in places like that

00:34:50.179 --> 00:34:51.659
as well the obvious thing is looking at things

00:34:51.659 --> 00:34:53.739
like wooden spoons or looking at riding crops

00:34:53.739 --> 00:34:55.739
in an actual equestrian store instead of a sex

00:34:55.739 --> 00:34:58.730
shop or yeah you know hitting someone with a

00:34:58.730 --> 00:35:01.829
plank of wood in b &q i guess um but you can

00:35:01.829 --> 00:35:03.570
also go for the really weird stuff so we got

00:35:03.570 --> 00:35:06.010
that uh we've got a couple of barbecue brushes

00:35:06.010 --> 00:35:08.230
from ikea and we got a brush that was i think

00:35:08.230 --> 00:35:10.650
for cleaning out like bottles and jars yeah you

00:35:10.650 --> 00:35:12.789
have hit me with um which is really fun but you

00:35:12.789 --> 00:35:14.929
have also used it to violently internally scrub

00:35:14.929 --> 00:35:19.329
me which i'm a big fan of yeah yeah always always

00:35:19.329 --> 00:35:22.949
good fun was that also where we got the the kneader

00:35:23.320 --> 00:35:25.079
from no i think we got that from amazon didn't

00:35:25.079 --> 00:35:27.139
we i think that was from amazon mix so i've got

00:35:27.139 --> 00:35:29.920
uh because i get massive sensory issues putting

00:35:29.920 --> 00:35:32.320
my hands in things when i'm baking before i got

00:35:32.320 --> 00:35:35.860
a food processor for making pastry i got um like

00:35:35.860 --> 00:35:37.800
a paste i think it's called like a pastry cutter

00:35:37.800 --> 00:35:40.260
so it's essentially like a giant knuckle duster

00:35:40.260 --> 00:35:44.340
but yeah with sort of slits in it um that cuts

00:35:44.340 --> 00:35:46.760
up the the butter into the pastry so you're not

00:35:46.760 --> 00:35:48.480
having to rub it in with your fingers yeah you

00:35:48.480 --> 00:35:50.099
generally still have to finish it off a little

00:35:50.099 --> 00:35:52.179
bit by hand but it made it a lot easier for me

00:35:52.179 --> 00:35:54.099
to deal with so i wasn't like cringing at the

00:35:54.099 --> 00:35:55.739
bits of butter and flour getting under my nails

00:35:55.739 --> 00:35:58.619
um and i got one of those to use in the kitchen

00:35:58.619 --> 00:36:00.179
and when it arrived i sort of looked at it and

00:36:00.179 --> 00:36:02.500
held it up and i was like this will be good so

00:36:02.500 --> 00:36:07.579
we got a second one for that yeah um and then

00:36:07.579 --> 00:36:09.260
the fifth level is things that are completely

00:36:09.260 --> 00:36:11.440
and utterly incomprehensible and this is why

00:36:11.440 --> 00:36:13.320
i said probably the first four is where you find

00:36:13.320 --> 00:36:17.079
good impact toys because level five is when someone

00:36:17.079 --> 00:36:19.519
could literally look at you know you're a kinky

00:36:19.519 --> 00:36:21.800
person look at the stuff you've bought and still

00:36:21.800 --> 00:36:23.980
not figure it out my favorite example of that

00:36:23.980 --> 00:36:26.079
was when we put in the amazon order for a packet

00:36:26.079 --> 00:36:28.940
of cheesecloth and uh 10 liters of distilled

00:36:28.940 --> 00:36:31.679
water and a watering can yeah people who've listened

00:36:31.679 --> 00:36:33.260
to our podcast for a while will know exactly

00:36:33.260 --> 00:36:36.000
where that was going but i feel like well i know

00:36:36.000 --> 00:36:38.119
because i i sent a picture of the order to one

00:36:38.119 --> 00:36:39.539
of my vanilla friends and was like what do you

00:36:39.539 --> 00:36:42.619
think's going on and she was like what yeah what

00:36:42.619 --> 00:36:44.940
and then because she's really into reading a

00:36:44.940 --> 00:36:46.360
lot of thrillers and stuff she was like oh shit

00:36:46.360 --> 00:36:48.980
waterboarding but it took her a minute yeah i

00:36:48.980 --> 00:36:51.579
think it was the watering the little green watering

00:36:51.579 --> 00:36:53.559
can that threw her wasn't it yeah i don't think

00:36:53.559 --> 00:36:56.019
she had ever associated those nice little green

00:36:56.019 --> 00:36:58.039
watering cans with waterboarding before yeah

00:36:58.800 --> 00:37:01.960
True. So yes, you kind of run out of traditional

00:37:01.960 --> 00:37:03.860
things to use for kink and you're like, oh yes,

00:37:03.900 --> 00:37:07.300
let's go to B &Q, let's go to Ikea. Yeah. One

00:37:07.300 --> 00:37:09.280
thing I am genuinely curious about though, kind

00:37:09.280 --> 00:37:13.460
of, because crops are quite a popular thing to

00:37:13.460 --> 00:37:17.860
hit people with. But like a crop that you would

00:37:17.860 --> 00:37:20.099
buy from Ann Summers or Love Honey or even somewhere

00:37:20.099 --> 00:37:23.820
like Bondara or Ubi Kinky is different from an

00:37:23.820 --> 00:37:31.530
actual riding crop, isn't it? horse shop is really

00:37:31.530 --> 00:37:34.789
quite mean yeah they tend to be better made even

00:37:34.789 --> 00:37:36.530
than the ones that you'll get in a nice kink

00:37:36.530 --> 00:37:38.969
market they are designed because horses have

00:37:38.969 --> 00:37:41.210
got really thick skin better designed that you

00:37:41.210 --> 00:37:42.530
can hit a horse really hard with them if you

00:37:42.530 --> 00:37:45.769
need to um and they are designed to last for

00:37:45.769 --> 00:37:47.750
a long time their sports equipment so yeah so

00:37:47.750 --> 00:37:50.409
they're good quality um i haven't been hit with

00:37:50.409 --> 00:37:53.469
one since i was a teenager like so my my memory

00:37:53.469 --> 00:37:56.070
of that is a little uh rusty but from what i

00:37:56.070 --> 00:37:59.619
remember it was Like it was thicker and heavier.

00:37:59.880 --> 00:38:01.519
Yeah, because I can imagine the ones that you

00:38:01.519 --> 00:38:04.079
get in a, I called them a horse shop earlier

00:38:04.079 --> 00:38:08.239
on, an equestrian shop. In the horse shop. In

00:38:08.239 --> 00:38:11.239
the horse shop. Buying horses. Sounds like the

00:38:11.239 --> 00:38:15.400
worst shop ever. I can imagine the ones that

00:38:15.400 --> 00:38:18.280
like the proper equestrian ones, like the shafts

00:38:18.280 --> 00:38:20.300
are really, I can imagine they're quite stiff.

00:38:21.099 --> 00:38:23.179
They still need to be flexible mix, but they

00:38:23.179 --> 00:38:25.880
are more sturdy. They're a little bit less sort

00:38:25.880 --> 00:38:29.179
of easily bent. Yeah. right we should get one

00:38:29.179 --> 00:38:30.860
we should get one for science because it has

00:38:30.860 --> 00:38:32.219
been a very long time since i've been hit with

00:38:32.219 --> 00:38:35.599
one yeah using a proper one that you could use

00:38:35.599 --> 00:38:38.320
on a horse i think would be quite interesting

00:38:38.320 --> 00:38:40.800
for when i'm being a naughty horse but for when

00:38:40.800 --> 00:38:44.699
you're being a naughty horse yeah or when even

00:38:44.699 --> 00:38:46.119
when you're not being a naughty horse just because

00:38:46.940 --> 00:38:48.400
just because i want to hit you with something

00:38:48.400 --> 00:38:50.659
yeah what you should do is you should have one

00:38:50.659 --> 00:38:52.820
in the car and every time i point out horses

00:38:52.820 --> 00:39:00.099
and go horses give me a whack with it yeah yeah

00:39:00.099 --> 00:39:03.599
for what purpose that wouldn't discourage you

00:39:03.599 --> 00:39:08.139
no i just for fun mix for enjoyment wouldn't

00:39:08.139 --> 00:39:10.360
stop you pointing out all of the horses to me

00:39:10.360 --> 00:39:13.230
no It's quite a mean thing I do, really, because

00:39:13.230 --> 00:39:15.090
you're terrified of horses. Yeah. And that's

00:39:15.090 --> 00:39:16.650
not why I do it. I do it because I'm excited

00:39:16.650 --> 00:39:20.489
to see the horses. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And to be

00:39:20.489 --> 00:39:22.409
fair, I will point out horses as well. Yeah.

00:39:22.469 --> 00:39:25.110
I will do the horses. Horses. And we point out

00:39:25.110 --> 00:39:28.710
other animals. Cows and sheeps. Yeah. And you

00:39:28.710 --> 00:39:31.789
taught me not long ago, actually, that it is

00:39:31.789 --> 00:39:35.150
always plural. Yes. If there is one cow or one

00:39:35.150 --> 00:39:40.929
sheep in a field, it's still cows. Yeah. Or sheeps.

00:39:40.969 --> 00:39:44.329
Yeah, or horses. Or horses. Yeah. And I don't

00:39:44.329 --> 00:39:47.909
think I realised that there are always multiple.

00:39:48.670 --> 00:39:49.949
Yeah, because there were a few times where you

00:39:49.949 --> 00:39:55.969
went horse and I went horses. One horses. And

00:39:55.969 --> 00:39:57.789
I like to point out when there's chickens, and

00:39:57.789 --> 00:39:59.329
especially if they are free chickens because

00:39:59.329 --> 00:40:01.070
they've escaped onto the road, and then I think

00:40:01.070 --> 00:40:03.309
we should invite them to come for a drive with

00:40:03.309 --> 00:40:05.730
us. Well, yeah, that's because you fundamentally

00:40:05.730 --> 00:40:08.559
misunderstand the word free. In that context,

00:40:08.639 --> 00:40:11.940
they're not free chickens. They're free chickens.

00:40:16.019 --> 00:40:23.360
You know, it's a very subtle. People listening

00:40:23.360 --> 00:40:25.440
to that going, what the fuck are they talking

00:40:25.440 --> 00:40:27.639
about? They just said the same thing twice. Yeah.

00:40:29.739 --> 00:40:31.619
They're not chickens that you can obtain at no

00:40:31.619 --> 00:40:36.400
cost. They are liberated chickens. That you could

00:40:36.400 --> 00:40:39.179
also obtain at no cost if you just pulled the

00:40:39.179 --> 00:40:41.199
car over. Well, no, because they're quite happy

00:40:41.199 --> 00:40:43.340
where they are. You don't know that. You don't

00:40:43.340 --> 00:40:47.159
speak chicken. Neither do you. That is true.

00:40:48.219 --> 00:40:51.880
Anyway. Ridiculous, ridiculous person. So I thought

00:40:51.880 --> 00:40:53.920
we'd talk about a few of our favourites now that

00:40:53.920 --> 00:40:56.519
I've gone through the range of different types

00:40:56.519 --> 00:40:58.920
of things that we can have. Yeah. Get into some

00:40:58.920 --> 00:41:01.139
specifics. What are a couple of your favourites

00:41:01.139 --> 00:41:03.980
of our toys mix? A couple of my favourites are

00:41:03.980 --> 00:41:07.139
probably your least favourites. That makes sense.

00:41:07.340 --> 00:41:13.860
Yeah. My absolute favourite is a Mav Toybox creation.

00:41:14.340 --> 00:41:17.739
I think on his website it is called a Flick Whip,

00:41:17.760 --> 00:41:21.460
but it is commonly known as the Cariesel Breaker.

00:41:21.860 --> 00:41:24.360
Yes, one of our friends literally went to his

00:41:24.360 --> 00:41:26.300
stall and said, can I have one of the whips that

00:41:26.300 --> 00:41:31.889
broke Cariesel? Yeah. It is... two it's a two

00:41:31.889 --> 00:41:36.230
tail whip two fairly long strips of uh pvc one

00:41:36.230 --> 00:41:40.269
orange one black purely for aesthetics um which

00:41:40.269 --> 00:41:46.909
is just nasty it is a nasty stingy whippy wrap

00:41:46.909 --> 00:41:51.289
around whatever it's hitting just awful to experience

00:41:51.289 --> 00:41:55.469
and i absolutely love it yeah and it it became

00:41:55.469 --> 00:41:58.239
known to us and probably a few of our friends

00:41:58.239 --> 00:42:00.840
at this point as the carousel breaker um because

00:42:00.840 --> 00:42:02.980
of the unhinged whipping that we reference all

00:42:02.980 --> 00:42:05.659
the time that we did at kinky camping last year

00:42:05.659 --> 00:42:09.280
um where you hit me 65 times with it as hard

00:42:09.280 --> 00:42:11.579
as you could and i cried and said i hated you

00:42:11.579 --> 00:42:14.840
and pissed myself yes would you like ideal outcome

00:42:14.840 --> 00:42:17.900
and then it broke me again at kinky camping yeah

00:42:17.900 --> 00:42:22.099
this year during the witch trial yes it's amazing

00:42:22.099 --> 00:42:26.610
um but it's I mean, I like it because of the

00:42:26.610 --> 00:42:28.949
effect that it has on you. So the sadist in me

00:42:28.949 --> 00:42:32.489
really likes it. But it's very well made, but

00:42:32.489 --> 00:42:35.349
quite simple. Yeah. It's like you get, you see

00:42:35.349 --> 00:42:38.230
some of these, some impact toys and they're kind

00:42:38.230 --> 00:42:41.510
of really, you can see that the maker has really

00:42:41.510 --> 00:42:43.489
thought about it and kind of put an awful lot

00:42:43.489 --> 00:42:47.409
of work into getting the angles of everything

00:42:47.409 --> 00:42:50.329
just right. This is basically two strips of PVC

00:42:50.329 --> 00:42:53.750
on a bit of wood and brilliantly made, really

00:42:53.750 --> 00:42:57.269
good quality. very good attention to detail mavi

00:42:57.269 --> 00:42:59.769
is really good at what he does but it's dead

00:42:59.769 --> 00:43:03.230
simple from like from my perspective yeah i just

00:43:03.230 --> 00:43:08.590
i just love it um and then the other one is what

00:43:08.590 --> 00:43:13.269
we uh lovingly refer to as the evil one uh which

00:43:13.269 --> 00:43:15.909
you lovingly refer to it as the evil one i mean

00:43:15.909 --> 00:43:22.699
it yeah yes um Which is a paddle. It's a rubber

00:43:22.699 --> 00:43:26.500
paddle with a tyre tread on it. And it's, again,

00:43:26.559 --> 00:43:32.559
really light. Dead easy to handle. But I think

00:43:32.559 --> 00:43:35.679
it's the worst possible combination of slap and

00:43:35.679 --> 00:43:41.400
sting. Yeah. For you. And it leaves really good

00:43:41.400 --> 00:43:44.400
marks, even on you, even now. Yeah. As difficult

00:43:44.400 --> 00:43:47.500
as you can be to bruise. um it leaves really

00:43:47.500 --> 00:43:51.119
really satisfying marks in the moment yeah even

00:43:51.119 --> 00:43:53.480
if they don't fully bruise on me in the moment

00:43:53.480 --> 00:43:55.880
you get the actual tire tread which is very cool

00:43:55.880 --> 00:44:00.300
yeah yeah um i think i got that from etsy yeah

00:44:00.300 --> 00:44:04.619
i think that's an etsy um purchase it's just

00:44:04.619 --> 00:44:07.760
brilliant i really really enjoy using it and

00:44:07.760 --> 00:44:10.420
that's the kind of thing that i really like because

00:44:10.420 --> 00:44:16.440
i'm a nasty old sadist i really like using lightweight,

00:44:16.440 --> 00:44:23.039
whippy, stingy things. Partly because I'm a sadist,

00:44:23.039 --> 00:44:25.099
partly because it means it doesn't hurt my shoulder.

00:44:25.360 --> 00:44:31.179
That is very valid. Your passion for thuddy impact

00:44:31.179 --> 00:44:36.280
does not get on well with my 47 -year -old shoulder

00:44:36.280 --> 00:44:38.619
sometimes. Yeah, I can tell sometimes when I

00:44:38.619 --> 00:44:40.179
pick something up at a market and you're like,

00:44:40.260 --> 00:44:42.849
no. No, I will hurt myself. No. And I'm like,

00:44:42.889 --> 00:44:44.849
but it's so nice. And you're like, no. Yeah.

00:44:44.929 --> 00:44:47.409
I'm not hitting you with that. I will ruin my

00:44:47.409 --> 00:44:51.369
body. Like that massive wooden sword, almost

00:44:51.369 --> 00:44:54.190
as tall as me. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Bring that around

00:44:54.190 --> 00:44:56.309
in the bedroom. And there was a stall somewhere,

00:44:56.349 --> 00:44:58.369
an event we were at, where someone had got like

00:44:58.369 --> 00:45:03.570
these big sort of like D20 dice, dies, dice,

00:45:03.570 --> 00:45:06.960
dices on like a chain. yeah and you're like those

00:45:06.960 --> 00:45:09.380
are so cool and so nerdy and they look like they

00:45:09.380 --> 00:45:11.380
would be really like they would feel really nice

00:45:11.380 --> 00:45:14.139
to be hit with for you yeah but i'm gonna either

00:45:14.139 --> 00:45:16.219
hit myself with that or wrench my shoulder out

00:45:16.219 --> 00:45:19.239
of its joint i'm not doing yeah yeah yeah yeah

00:45:19.239 --> 00:45:22.940
yes because i do like because it was like a flogger

00:45:22.940 --> 00:45:25.340
wasn't it was it a flogger i think these were

00:45:25.340 --> 00:45:27.320
just a single one on a chain but we have we've

00:45:27.320 --> 00:45:28.900
seen floggers that were similar as well as like

00:45:28.900 --> 00:45:31.780
big heavy sort of balls or some kind of object

00:45:31.780 --> 00:45:33.760
on the end of them and it's often the problem

00:45:33.760 --> 00:45:35.920
is that you're like i'm gonna put my shoulder

00:45:35.920 --> 00:45:38.699
out doing that yeah yeah but also i'm not sure

00:45:38.699 --> 00:45:41.460
how you would i'm not sure i'm skilled enough

00:45:41.460 --> 00:45:43.340
with a flogger to be able to kind of wield that

00:45:43.340 --> 00:45:46.019
that's fair properly yeah i'm all right with

00:45:46.019 --> 00:45:48.860
a more traditional looking flogger but when there's

00:45:48.860 --> 00:45:51.260
weight on the end of it it feels like it's just

00:45:51.260 --> 00:45:54.039
gonna flail everywhere yeah and it's like hit

00:45:54.039 --> 00:45:58.150
me hit the hit you hit me hit the window Hit

00:45:58.150 --> 00:46:00.309
all the things on the side. Yeah. Hit anyone

00:46:00.309 --> 00:46:05.469
who's standing nearby. No, that's fair. No. How

00:46:05.469 --> 00:46:06.869
about you? What are a couple of your favourites?

00:46:06.949 --> 00:46:08.550
A big favourite for me, we've got a few of these,

00:46:08.590 --> 00:46:12.289
is any kind of ball on a stick type toy. So we've

00:46:12.289 --> 00:46:15.710
got one that's like a little rubber ball, I think

00:46:15.710 --> 00:46:17.369
weighted with something on the inside that's

00:46:17.369 --> 00:46:20.230
on a rigid steel stick. And you just whack me

00:46:20.230 --> 00:46:23.670
with the ball. We've got one that is, I want

00:46:23.670 --> 00:46:26.650
to say a softball. possibly i think so something

00:46:26.650 --> 00:46:29.510
like that like a medium -sized sports ball again

00:46:29.510 --> 00:46:32.809
on a on a stick yeah and they're generally pretty

00:46:32.809 --> 00:46:34.409
easy for you to use because you're just waving

00:46:34.409 --> 00:46:36.989
a stick around yeah and the ball delivers a really

00:46:36.989 --> 00:46:40.110
nice intense thud when it lands yeah and we used

00:46:40.110 --> 00:46:41.489
to have one that was a cricket ball on a sort

00:46:41.489 --> 00:46:43.250
of wibbly noodle but you found the wibbly noodle

00:46:43.250 --> 00:46:46.550
a little bit difficult to navigate so yeah i

00:46:46.550 --> 00:46:49.929
think it's the because the softball the medium

00:46:49.929 --> 00:46:52.289
-sized sports ball the thing that that's on it

00:46:52.289 --> 00:46:55.199
has got a little bit of wibble in it but it's

00:46:55.199 --> 00:46:59.139
quite thick braided wire, I think. Yeah. So it

00:46:59.139 --> 00:47:02.019
doesn't kind of ricochet about when you're kind

00:47:02.019 --> 00:47:05.699
of moving your hand. Whereas the cricket ball

00:47:05.699 --> 00:47:10.019
is really fun, but is quite hard to get a rhythm

00:47:10.019 --> 00:47:12.820
with because it's constantly kind of bouncing

00:47:12.820 --> 00:47:16.440
back and forth when I'm... wielding it yeah so

00:47:16.440 --> 00:47:18.659
that one's gone into the bag of kit that we are

00:47:18.659 --> 00:47:21.079
we love to make it sound as weird as possible

00:47:21.079 --> 00:47:22.659
by saying it's a bag of kink stuff we're giving

00:47:22.659 --> 00:47:24.400
to the kids we are talking about hope and ash

00:47:24.400 --> 00:47:26.940
when we say the kids yes um because they are

00:47:26.940 --> 00:47:29.380
sort of our adopted children yeah they're weird

00:47:29.380 --> 00:47:31.980
everyone here is an adult and talks about kink

00:47:31.980 --> 00:47:36.039
in the group chat way yes but i like the uh the

00:47:36.039 --> 00:47:40.679
medium -sized sports ball um a because the like

00:47:40.679 --> 00:47:42.340
the shaft of it, the thing that it is on is that

00:47:42.340 --> 00:47:44.719
little bit stiffer. But I also feel like it kind

00:47:44.719 --> 00:47:46.920
of gives that. Gotta love a nice stiff shaft.

00:47:47.260 --> 00:47:54.980
You do. Yes. But I like the fact that it's weighted

00:47:54.980 --> 00:47:57.179
in a way that it kind of, once it's hit you,

00:47:57.219 --> 00:47:59.860
it kind of carries on a little bit. Yeah. You

00:47:59.860 --> 00:48:02.679
know, so it gives you that kind of deeper, deeper

00:48:02.679 --> 00:48:06.800
impact, which I quite like. Yeah. So yeah, balls

00:48:06.800 --> 00:48:09.099
on a stick. Balls on sticks. Yeah. Yeah. And.

00:48:09.679 --> 00:48:11.880
We've mentioned them briefly, but the two Venator

00:48:11.880 --> 00:48:15.760
paddles that we have. Way to humble brag, by

00:48:15.760 --> 00:48:17.360
the way. You said earlier on how difficult they

00:48:17.360 --> 00:48:19.159
are to get hold of, and we have two. We have

00:48:19.159 --> 00:48:21.360
two, yeah. I'm really good at buying stuff online.

00:48:21.579 --> 00:48:24.820
That's one of my skills. Veteran of the Taylor

00:48:24.820 --> 00:48:27.039
Swift Ticketmaster Wars here. I can get anything.

00:48:27.699 --> 00:48:31.199
So, yeah, we've got a couple of those. And if

00:48:31.199 --> 00:48:33.679
you are on FetLife, look up Venator Customs on

00:48:33.679 --> 00:48:37.500
FetLife to see the just insane quality of the

00:48:37.500 --> 00:48:40.199
stuff that he makes. they are the kind of thing

00:48:40.199 --> 00:48:41.920
you could just put on your wall if you didn't

00:48:41.920 --> 00:48:43.579
mind your house guests knowing you were kinky

00:48:43.579 --> 00:48:45.860
you could just have a whole display of them or

00:48:45.860 --> 00:48:47.840
or one seeing as they're hard to get a hold of

00:48:47.840 --> 00:48:50.519
on your wall they're beautiful like really good

00:48:50.519 --> 00:48:53.099
quality wood just the amount of work that goes

00:48:53.099 --> 00:48:55.360
into the finishing of them they've all got like

00:48:55.360 --> 00:48:58.800
gemstone inlays they've got brass inlays for

00:48:58.800 --> 00:49:03.300
added weight and they're just so pretty um but

00:49:03.300 --> 00:49:05.920
they are also really great to get hit with they're

00:49:05.920 --> 00:49:07.820
really versatile toys both of the ones we've

00:49:07.820 --> 00:49:10.670
got have got multiple edges that can be used

00:49:10.670 --> 00:49:12.809
in different ways so you've got like a point

00:49:12.809 --> 00:49:14.989
for sort of jabbing at people you've got a thin

00:49:14.989 --> 00:49:16.610
edge that will give you more of a thud you've

00:49:16.610 --> 00:49:19.889
got a flat side that gives you more slap um one

00:49:19.889 --> 00:49:22.170
of them has got like a section of sort of little

00:49:22.170 --> 00:49:25.070
points little ridges on it that will give more

00:49:25.070 --> 00:49:28.130
of an interesting kind of bumpy thud feel if

00:49:28.130 --> 00:49:29.429
you're using it gently and if you're using it

00:49:29.429 --> 00:49:31.949
hard it'll break the skin so they just do everything

00:49:31.949 --> 00:49:34.750
yeah they're really really fucking cool they

00:49:34.750 --> 00:49:38.429
are and dead easy to handle as well I don't know

00:49:38.429 --> 00:49:40.289
how they do it in the construction and the way

00:49:40.289 --> 00:49:42.309
they use the weights and stuff like that. But

00:49:42.309 --> 00:49:45.210
it's just a dream. It's really well balanced

00:49:45.210 --> 00:49:47.949
and really easy to kind of hold and wield and

00:49:47.949 --> 00:49:50.989
use. Yeah. I have zero experience hitting people

00:49:50.989 --> 00:49:52.469
with them, but I can tell just from picking them

00:49:52.469 --> 00:49:54.670
up, they feel really well balanced and comfortable

00:49:54.670 --> 00:49:59.570
to hold. So, yeah, they are like gold dust. But

00:49:59.570 --> 00:50:02.469
if you can get hold of one, very worth doing.

00:50:02.849 --> 00:50:05.449
Yes, definitely. Another thing I really like

00:50:05.449 --> 00:50:09.840
is a hammer. Yes. In the B &Q section of the...

00:50:11.179 --> 00:50:14.559
kink collection yeah b &q or ikea for that matter

00:50:14.559 --> 00:50:16.739
because a meat tenderizer does the same job so

00:50:16.739 --> 00:50:19.639
hammers and hammer like objects yeah it was so

00:50:19.639 --> 00:50:21.320
funny before we went to kinky camping this year

00:50:21.320 --> 00:50:22.960
i put a picture on instagram of all the stuff

00:50:22.960 --> 00:50:26.300
we were packing and there was some scary stuff

00:50:26.300 --> 00:50:28.500
in that picture i mean to be fair the um the

00:50:28.500 --> 00:50:30.219
flick whip that we were talking about before

00:50:30.219 --> 00:50:32.980
was like partially hidden behind a bag but i

00:50:32.980 --> 00:50:34.400
don't think people would have necessarily noticed

00:50:34.400 --> 00:50:37.059
it even if it had been right out there was stuff

00:50:37.059 --> 00:50:38.780
for waterboarding out there there were lots of

00:50:38.780 --> 00:50:41.260
really horrible stingy slappy things there was

00:50:41.260 --> 00:50:43.239
all of the stuff that i'm most scared of but

00:50:43.239 --> 00:50:45.019
there was also a hammer on the bed yeah and i

00:50:45.019 --> 00:50:46.699
got so many comments on instagram being like

00:50:46.699 --> 00:50:48.920
oh my god not the hammer please tell me you're

00:50:48.920 --> 00:50:50.460
taking that to like help with putting the tent

00:50:50.460 --> 00:50:52.019
up or something please tell me you're doing diy

00:50:52.019 --> 00:50:54.360
and it's like no that is the most chill thing

00:50:54.360 --> 00:50:56.480
on the bed that's the thing i specifically requested

00:50:56.480 --> 00:50:59.179
when i saw stuff was there i was like can we

00:50:59.179 --> 00:51:00.880
please take the hammer so i can have a nice time

00:51:00.880 --> 00:51:04.860
at some point yeah yeah i mean we did also take

00:51:04.860 --> 00:51:07.380
a mallet for both purposes yeah the mallet was

00:51:07.380 --> 00:51:11.880
needed for the tent need it to hit you yeah um

00:51:11.880 --> 00:51:13.880
dear mallets are another one in that category

00:51:13.880 --> 00:51:16.400
mallets meet tenderizers hammers already good

00:51:16.400 --> 00:51:19.340
because they are just pure thud most of the time

00:51:19.340 --> 00:51:21.079
you've discovered using the side of them to hit

00:51:21.079 --> 00:51:24.780
me with which ruins my day um the hammer specifically

00:51:24.780 --> 00:51:26.760
the mallet doesn't you seem to still like the

00:51:26.760 --> 00:51:29.159
mallet mallet side isn't too bad yeah it's not

00:51:29.159 --> 00:51:31.139
as nice as you using it the way i like it but

00:51:31.139 --> 00:51:32.780
it's it's not that slappy but the side of the

00:51:32.780 --> 00:51:35.280
hammer if i'm not warmed up is really slappy

00:51:35.280 --> 00:51:36.900
once i'm warmed up i get more of the third coming

00:51:36.900 --> 00:51:39.039
through from that as well yeah because you tried

00:51:39.039 --> 00:51:40.840
that the last 30 beating we did you're like haha

00:51:40.840 --> 00:51:43.039
a nasty surprise for the pick side of the hammer

00:51:43.039 --> 00:51:45.699
and i was like oh yes and you're like oh no no

00:51:45.699 --> 00:51:49.739
too floaty now too too far gone oh no yeah um

00:51:49.739 --> 00:51:52.460
but yeah stuff like that it looks really extreme

00:51:52.460 --> 00:51:54.199
it seems like it would be really extreme but

00:51:54.199 --> 00:51:57.710
it just delivers a really concentrated deep feeling

00:51:57.710 --> 00:51:59.949
it's more like a sort of painful massage you

00:51:59.949 --> 00:52:01.309
know when someone's really going for it with

00:52:01.309 --> 00:52:03.570
a massage it's like that and you obviously have

00:52:03.570 --> 00:52:05.469
to be careful about where you're using it we're

00:52:05.469 --> 00:52:07.769
going to talk a little bit about safety with

00:52:07.769 --> 00:52:10.190
impact a bit later on but particularly with things

00:52:10.190 --> 00:52:12.090
like hammers obviously if you hit someone in

00:52:12.090 --> 00:52:13.969
the face with a hammer they're going to go to

00:52:13.969 --> 00:52:16.269
hospital if you hit someone in the hands and

00:52:16.269 --> 00:52:18.130
the feet if you hit them on a joint if you hit

00:52:18.130 --> 00:52:20.130
them anywhere that that you shouldn't be it's

00:52:20.130 --> 00:52:22.590
really dangerous um but if you're hitting someone

00:52:22.590 --> 00:52:25.000
in the butt or the thighs with a hammer There's

00:52:25.000 --> 00:52:28.039
so much squish there. So you just get the really

00:52:28.039 --> 00:52:30.099
deep bruising feeling of it. And it's really

00:52:30.099 --> 00:52:32.480
nice. So I'm a big fan of a hammer. Big fan of

00:52:32.480 --> 00:52:34.880
hammers. What do you think of canes mix? Because

00:52:34.880 --> 00:52:37.000
I know I mentioned I really like canes. How do

00:52:37.000 --> 00:52:41.219
you find those? A good quality cane. A good quality

00:52:41.219 --> 00:52:44.139
cane is really fun. They're surprisingly versatile

00:52:44.139 --> 00:52:46.500
in terms of like where you can use them and how

00:52:46.500 --> 00:52:48.420
you can use them. Obviously, there is, as with

00:52:48.420 --> 00:52:50.500
any kind of impact toy, there are some limitations

00:52:50.500 --> 00:52:53.260
on where you can use different things. But like

00:52:53.260 --> 00:52:55.340
a cane is pretty versatile. You can kind of use

00:52:55.340 --> 00:52:57.639
it basically on your whole, pretty much your

00:52:57.639 --> 00:53:00.099
whole lower half. Yeah. Like you avoid joints

00:53:00.099 --> 00:53:02.599
and directly on bone and stuff like that. But

00:53:02.599 --> 00:53:04.880
there aren't big areas of the lower half of your

00:53:04.880 --> 00:53:07.019
body that you can't safely use them on, including

00:53:07.019 --> 00:53:11.380
feet. I really like bastinado foot caning. Good

00:53:11.380 --> 00:53:16.239
time. And like you can really vary the pace and

00:53:16.239 --> 00:53:19.019
the force and stuff like that and have really

00:53:19.019 --> 00:53:21.539
different effects. Yeah. With it, you know, kind

00:53:21.539 --> 00:53:26.579
of really. long hard swap down has a really different

00:53:26.579 --> 00:53:30.139
impact to starting off really light with lots

00:53:30.139 --> 00:53:32.280
of really fast taps and then the taps get harder

00:53:32.280 --> 00:53:34.599
i really like that that's my favorite way that

00:53:34.599 --> 00:53:36.579
you cane me yeah so of course what you often

00:53:36.579 --> 00:53:38.440
do is switch to a really big hard whack at some

00:53:38.440 --> 00:53:43.059
point yeah yeah and that's because they're dead

00:53:43.059 --> 00:53:46.340
light they're dead easy to to handle you can

00:53:46.340 --> 00:53:51.219
get really creative yeah with it And I do enjoy

00:53:51.219 --> 00:53:53.800
kind of doing the tap, tap, tap, tap, tap and

00:53:53.800 --> 00:53:55.159
getting harder and harder and harder and then

00:53:55.159 --> 00:53:57.940
just going wallop right across your butt. That

00:53:57.940 --> 00:54:04.159
is a fun thing to do. But we have a couple of

00:54:04.159 --> 00:54:06.800
different types of cane, don't we? We've got

00:54:06.800 --> 00:54:11.380
some wooden ones of different thicknesses and

00:54:11.380 --> 00:54:14.099
then we've got some delrin ones of different

00:54:14.099 --> 00:54:19.650
thicknesses. Thicknesses. I fucking hate the

00:54:19.650 --> 00:54:23.050
Delrin canes. Yeah. Because I really like wooden

00:54:23.050 --> 00:54:25.250
canes. And I'll be like to you, oh, can I have

00:54:25.250 --> 00:54:27.570
a nice caning? And you're like, oh, yes, a nice

00:54:27.570 --> 00:54:29.829
caning for the pig. And then you get the Delrin

00:54:29.829 --> 00:54:32.489
cane. I'm like, no, a nice caning. Mix a nice

00:54:32.489 --> 00:54:35.650
caning. I don't actually know what Delrin is.

00:54:35.730 --> 00:54:37.429
It's like plastic, isn't it? It's type of plastic.

00:54:37.530 --> 00:54:41.650
Yeah, mix. Yeah. I think they make tubes with

00:54:41.650 --> 00:54:44.309
it. I think it's used for sort of. pipes and

00:54:44.309 --> 00:54:46.929
tubes possibly right i don't know maybe someone

00:54:46.929 --> 00:54:49.050
who is less kinky and more practical than us

00:54:49.050 --> 00:54:51.570
can tell us what delrin is for yeah for us it's

00:54:51.570 --> 00:54:54.090
for hitting people yeah but we've also got the

00:54:54.090 --> 00:54:56.429
really thick delrin cane as well haven't we yeah

00:54:56.429 --> 00:54:58.949
i like that one which is you you really like

00:54:58.949 --> 00:55:01.230
because it's really thuddy yeah so that one i'm

00:55:01.230 --> 00:55:03.210
sure it's like an inch and a half thick solid

00:55:03.210 --> 00:55:05.449
piece of delrin that one of our friends managed

00:55:05.449 --> 00:55:08.500
to get hold of Because Delrin usually comes in

00:55:08.500 --> 00:55:11.079
thinner thicknesses than that. And this friend

00:55:11.079 --> 00:55:12.940
managed to find the big, chonky lump of Delrin

00:55:12.940 --> 00:55:15.880
and gave us a piece. And it's so good. It's so

00:55:15.880 --> 00:55:20.619
good. It's like a club. It's just thuddy. Thuddy.

00:55:20.739 --> 00:55:23.019
Good time. But the two Delrin canes that you

00:55:23.019 --> 00:55:25.760
really like are both skinny little fuckers. Yes.

00:55:25.880 --> 00:55:29.219
And hurt so much more than wood. Yes. Great fun.

00:55:29.440 --> 00:55:32.800
And more durable as well. Because we've got through

00:55:32.800 --> 00:55:37.369
a few canes. We have. two and a half ish years

00:55:37.369 --> 00:55:40.590
we've been together yeah because of your indestructible

00:55:40.590 --> 00:55:45.369
butt yeah i felt so bad that not our first hookup

00:55:45.369 --> 00:55:47.510
a couple of years before we got together but

00:55:47.510 --> 00:55:49.610
the first hookup this time around when we met

00:55:49.610 --> 00:55:52.250
again you broke you had a quite nice wooden cane

00:55:52.250 --> 00:55:55.289
and you broke it on me on a hookup yeah and i

00:55:55.289 --> 00:55:57.670
i bought you a new one and then we broke that

00:55:57.670 --> 00:56:03.840
yeah yes And I suppose I should, you know, I

00:56:03.840 --> 00:56:05.519
probably should take some responsibility for

00:56:05.519 --> 00:56:06.820
that because I was the one hitting you hard enough

00:56:06.820 --> 00:56:08.920
to break it. Yeah. But you are the one with the

00:56:08.920 --> 00:56:15.820
iron butt. So good quality wooden canes. The

00:56:15.820 --> 00:56:17.400
two wooden canes that we've got have lasted a

00:56:17.400 --> 00:56:18.920
while though. They have, yeah. I don't know if

00:56:18.920 --> 00:56:20.579
that's just because we're not doing as much caning

00:56:20.579 --> 00:56:22.440
as we maybe were at the time or if they are better

00:56:22.440 --> 00:56:25.199
quality. But I think inevitably wooden canes

00:56:25.199 --> 00:56:26.659
aren't going to last forever if you're using

00:56:26.659 --> 00:56:30.369
them hard. But then also not generally particularly

00:56:30.369 --> 00:56:32.769
expensive. No, they're usually pretty, pretty

00:56:32.769 --> 00:56:37.050
cheap. We don't have any bamboo cane, do we?

00:56:37.050 --> 00:56:40.829
Like the traditional cane. Yeah, bamboo is a

00:56:40.829 --> 00:56:43.349
little risky. If you take good care of it and

00:56:43.349 --> 00:56:45.909
you're not using it too hard and you are keeping

00:56:45.909 --> 00:56:48.949
a close eye on the quality of it, like some people

00:56:48.949 --> 00:56:51.489
really like it and swear by it. But if bamboo

00:56:51.489 --> 00:56:54.559
does break, it splinters. yeah it goes into like

00:56:54.559 --> 00:56:57.420
these really sharp shards that can cut someone

00:56:57.420 --> 00:57:00.579
quite badly um people end up with scars and quite

00:57:00.579 --> 00:57:03.739
nasty injuries from them so i my first ever cane

00:57:03.739 --> 00:57:06.719
was bamboo and it never broke but i have avoided

00:57:06.719 --> 00:57:09.300
it since i think as i've ramped up how hard i

00:57:09.300 --> 00:57:11.139
like to get caned it doesn't seem like the best

00:57:11.139 --> 00:57:14.300
idea for me yeah that's fair because you had

00:57:14.300 --> 00:57:16.659
the really nice one didn't you which was like

00:57:16.659 --> 00:57:18.920
i had a crook on on the top it looks really fancy

00:57:18.920 --> 00:57:21.769
but it was a tenner was it yeah yeah it was a

00:57:21.769 --> 00:57:23.690
really cheap one but it does look nice because

00:57:23.690 --> 00:57:26.170
it's got that kind of hook top yeah um and then

00:57:26.170 --> 00:57:27.929
i got that when me and hope were together and

00:57:27.929 --> 00:57:29.250
because of the pain that she gets in her hands

00:57:29.250 --> 00:57:31.230
and wrists i made a padded handle for it yeah

00:57:31.230 --> 00:57:33.829
which made it even fancier yeah yeah no i remember

00:57:33.829 --> 00:57:37.050
seeing that um we should probably talk about

00:57:37.050 --> 00:57:40.250
one which you made the baseball bat shit yeah

00:57:40.250 --> 00:57:42.530
the baseball bat i went completely blank then

00:57:42.530 --> 00:57:45.050
i was like what yes i haven't done a lot of toy

00:57:45.050 --> 00:57:48.389
making but i did I modified a baseball bat. I

00:57:48.389 --> 00:57:50.329
didn't make the baseball bat from scratch. True.

00:57:50.429 --> 00:57:53.250
I bought a baseball bat from eBay. And then I

00:57:53.250 --> 00:57:56.610
bought a pack of the Lotus discs, which are the

00:57:56.610 --> 00:57:58.989
spiky discs that you get on acupressure mats.

00:57:59.309 --> 00:58:02.230
Yep. You can buy those just loose. I got a pack

00:58:02.230 --> 00:58:04.269
of 100 of them. And I screwed a bunch of them

00:58:04.269 --> 00:58:06.869
onto a baseball bat. Yeah. And it's brilliant.

00:58:07.210 --> 00:58:10.130
Yeah. That toy exists because me and Hope were

00:58:10.130 --> 00:58:15.309
watching The Walking Dead. And... Uh -huh. And

00:58:15.309 --> 00:58:17.349
you know exactly where this is going. Yeah. To

00:58:17.349 --> 00:58:18.949
the bit where there's the baseball bat wrapped

00:58:18.949 --> 00:58:21.010
in barbed wire. And I did that face I do when

00:58:21.010 --> 00:58:23.250
I see something unhinged on TV. Yes. And Hope

00:58:23.250 --> 00:58:26.050
did the thing that you do where you go, no, no,

00:58:26.090 --> 00:58:29.409
no, you can't have that. No, I'm not doing that.

00:58:29.909 --> 00:58:32.929
And I said, what about like we scale it down

00:58:32.929 --> 00:58:36.090
a little bit? We make like the safe Lucille.

00:58:37.949 --> 00:58:40.710
And that's how the spiky baseball bat came to

00:58:40.710 --> 00:58:43.409
exist. Yeah. And it's brilliant. It is. It's

00:58:43.409 --> 00:58:47.300
such a good. such a it's such a good idea but

00:58:47.300 --> 00:58:50.760
also such a good thing for when we do like a

00:58:50.760 --> 00:58:53.719
bloody impact yeah uh scene it's what we use

00:58:53.719 --> 00:58:56.219
at the end of a bloody impact scene because it

00:58:56.219 --> 00:58:59.619
creates quite a mess yeah it really does it is

00:58:59.619 --> 00:59:02.960
the scene finisher yes but it's it's really good

00:59:02.960 --> 00:59:05.260
it feels way nicer than a lot of spiky impact

00:59:05.260 --> 00:59:07.340
stuff as well because of how heavy the bat is

00:59:07.340 --> 00:59:09.219
it's got a really nice thud to it so that warm

00:59:09.219 --> 00:59:10.880
pain i was talking about earlier that can feel

00:59:10.880 --> 00:59:14.219
intensely pleasurable or intensely painful yeah

00:59:14.219 --> 00:59:16.659
it sort of overrides that a little bit and stops

00:59:16.659 --> 00:59:18.780
it being too overwhelming in either direction

00:59:18.780 --> 00:59:20.460
and goes but here's some nice thud here's some

00:59:20.460 --> 00:59:23.000
nice thud yeah so it's it's a really nice scene

00:59:23.000 --> 00:59:24.960
finisher and if it wasn't for the fact that it

00:59:24.960 --> 00:59:26.840
would take all of my skin off i could probably

00:59:26.840 --> 00:59:30.739
use that for hours yes yeah it would turn your

00:59:31.119 --> 00:59:35.760
butt into actual mincemeat. Yeah. And I'm probably

00:59:35.760 --> 00:59:38.880
a little bit more cautious than perhaps I need

00:59:38.880 --> 00:59:41.699
to be, which is always a sensible thing to do.

00:59:41.760 --> 00:59:45.719
But because it has such an effect on you, it's

00:59:45.719 --> 00:59:48.320
sometimes difficult to see what is occurring

00:59:48.320 --> 00:59:52.659
on the butt. Yeah. So I kind of go, I need to

00:59:52.659 --> 00:59:55.960
stop and wipe it away so I can see what's happening

00:59:55.960 --> 00:59:58.739
underneath all of the blood all over your butt.

01:00:00.949 --> 01:00:02.610
So I could probably do a little bit more with

01:00:02.610 --> 01:00:04.469
it, but it's one of those things I really enjoy

01:00:04.469 --> 01:00:07.690
using it. And for being a baseball bat that you

01:00:07.690 --> 01:00:10.550
bought off eBay, again, actually quite nicely

01:00:10.550 --> 01:00:13.070
weighted, really easy to use because I don't

01:00:13.070 --> 01:00:17.050
need to use it all that hard. But I think I've

01:00:17.050 --> 01:00:18.849
probably stopped short of where I potentially

01:00:18.849 --> 01:00:22.750
could. Yeah. Which is probably the right side

01:00:22.750 --> 01:00:25.329
of that. Yeah. It's good for one of us to be

01:00:25.329 --> 01:00:27.670
sensible because I'm always like, another, another.

01:00:27.809 --> 01:00:33.519
And you're like. No, don't think so. Again! Again!

01:00:35.219 --> 01:00:37.440
I can never remember what that's from. It just

01:00:37.440 --> 01:00:41.739
feels like the noise inside my brain. Yeah. I

01:00:41.739 --> 01:00:43.480
can't remember what it's from either. Something

01:00:43.480 --> 01:00:45.980
we haven't talked as much about as a lot of other

01:00:45.980 --> 01:00:47.760
types of toys is floggers. We've touched on whips

01:00:47.760 --> 01:00:49.440
a little bit, but floggers we haven't really

01:00:49.440 --> 01:00:52.239
talked about loads. I think a really important

01:00:52.239 --> 01:00:54.820
thing that people should know if they're new

01:00:54.820 --> 01:00:56.800
to impact play or just starting to expand with

01:00:56.800 --> 01:00:59.809
impact play. is stuff like floggers particularly

01:00:59.809 --> 01:01:02.190
you will often see in sort of beginner sections

01:01:02.190 --> 01:01:03.949
and you'll see them in Ann Summers and things

01:01:03.949 --> 01:01:06.030
like that. Floggers are actually really fucking

01:01:06.030 --> 01:01:09.510
hard to use and whips even more so. Yeah. You've,

01:01:09.510 --> 01:01:12.670
I know, done a lot of practice to kind of get

01:01:12.670 --> 01:01:15.269
up to speed with what you need to do to hit me

01:01:15.269 --> 01:01:16.690
really hard with those sort of things because

01:01:16.690 --> 01:01:19.550
you had a flogger when we met. Yeah. But I think

01:01:19.550 --> 01:01:22.070
you'd not used it a lot and you hadn't ever hit

01:01:22.070 --> 01:01:23.630
someone properly hard with it. Is that right,

01:01:23.690 --> 01:01:26.750
Mix? Yeah. Between us, we've got a few floggers.

01:01:27.260 --> 01:01:31.440
uh now but whips and floggers are things that

01:01:31.440 --> 01:01:33.480
have always kind of scared me a little bit like

01:01:33.480 --> 01:01:36.380
needing to be able to control it both control

01:01:36.380 --> 01:01:39.559
it as it's as you're wielding it and it's moving

01:01:39.559 --> 01:01:41.579
through the air but also kind of where it's where

01:01:41.579 --> 01:01:44.860
it's hitting as well so with with a paddle or

01:01:44.860 --> 01:01:49.800
a cane or a ball on a stick or or whatever you

01:01:49.800 --> 01:01:54.019
can be pretty sure about your trajectory matches

01:01:54.019 --> 01:01:56.460
where you're going to land you can kind of predict

01:01:56.460 --> 01:02:01.340
that pretty accurately most of the time um with

01:02:01.340 --> 01:02:04.840
some floggers that feels a lot less certain for

01:02:04.840 --> 01:02:08.980
me so i kind of had to had to practice making

01:02:08.980 --> 01:02:12.659
sure that kind of when it lands it's not just

01:02:12.659 --> 01:02:15.099
fully splayed out and going everywhere and potentially

01:02:15.099 --> 01:02:18.659
hitting something that i shouldn't both in terms

01:02:18.659 --> 01:02:20.199
of hitting you, but also kind of if we're in

01:02:20.199 --> 01:02:22.920
a dungeon, for example. Yeah. And it's not hitting

01:02:22.920 --> 01:02:25.519
somebody else. Or hitting yourself. Or hitting

01:02:25.519 --> 01:02:27.119
myself. Which is always a risk. And you've definitely

01:02:27.119 --> 01:02:30.960
done a few times. Yes. Yeah, yeah. So I think

01:02:30.960 --> 01:02:34.219
I'm a lot more confident with floggers now. We've

01:02:34.219 --> 01:02:36.780
got a small one, which was really helpful because

01:02:36.780 --> 01:02:40.159
that just helps you get into the, get used to

01:02:40.159 --> 01:02:43.159
making the shape with your arms and your hands

01:02:43.159 --> 01:02:45.460
that you need to make. Yeah, I got that for you.

01:02:45.969 --> 01:02:48.090
with the idea that it would help you as a practice

01:02:48.090 --> 01:02:50.130
flogger but those are actually being sold as

01:02:50.130 --> 01:02:52.909
like um pussy or cock floggers they're little

01:02:52.909 --> 01:02:54.809
tiny mini ones that are designed for just whacking

01:02:54.809 --> 01:02:56.550
someone in the genitals with because you don't

01:02:56.550 --> 01:02:58.250
obviously need a huge flogger to hit a small

01:02:58.250 --> 01:03:00.769
area um and you've definitely used it for that

01:03:00.769 --> 01:03:02.869
yeah it's quite mean for that yeah but it's also

01:03:02.869 --> 01:03:05.050
really good as like a practice flogger or a warm

01:03:05.050 --> 01:03:06.989
-up flogger you'll quite often use that if you're

01:03:06.989 --> 01:03:08.909
going to be doing some flogging or whipping yeah

01:03:08.909 --> 01:03:10.769
so just do little tiny hits all over my back

01:03:10.769 --> 01:03:12.269
and my butt and my thighs just get everything

01:03:12.269 --> 01:03:14.750
warmed up yeah so it's a really good little versatile

01:03:14.750 --> 01:03:18.519
one Yeah. But the one that I had is quite a big

01:03:18.519 --> 01:03:22.460
one. Yeah. So that took a little bit more practicing.

01:03:22.539 --> 01:03:24.360
So I spent quite a bit of time kind of practicing

01:03:24.360 --> 01:03:27.039
on a cushion, making sure that I could kind of

01:03:27.039 --> 01:03:31.840
replicate where it was landing. So like setting

01:03:31.840 --> 01:03:34.719
up a cushion on the bed and then going through

01:03:34.719 --> 01:03:38.599
the motion and flogging the cushion to the point

01:03:38.599 --> 01:03:42.039
where I was always hitting the dent that I made

01:03:42.039 --> 01:03:44.769
on the first. Yeah. Impact. Kind of going, right,

01:03:44.809 --> 01:03:47.150
I want to hit it in the middle. So I'm making

01:03:47.150 --> 01:03:48.710
sure I hit it in the middle and I'm making sure

01:03:48.710 --> 01:03:50.550
that I'm repeatedly hitting the same spot rather

01:03:50.550 --> 01:03:53.769
than going all over the place. Yeah. So I feel

01:03:53.769 --> 01:03:56.090
a lot more kind of confident with those now.

01:03:56.329 --> 01:03:59.690
Whips, though, I still struggle with. Cariesel

01:03:59.690 --> 01:04:03.050
Breaker is a whip. Mm -hmm. Literally called

01:04:03.050 --> 01:04:07.050
a flick whip. But that feels to me a little bit

01:04:07.050 --> 01:04:09.289
more like a flogger. Yeah. Because of the way

01:04:09.289 --> 01:04:12.389
that it's designed. Yeah, two -tail whips are.

01:04:12.829 --> 01:04:14.610
They're kind of like a crossover between the

01:04:14.610 --> 01:04:17.630
two. Yeah, yeah. But we've also got a whip, which

01:04:17.630 --> 01:04:19.750
I don't think I've ever used on you. I just can't

01:04:19.750 --> 01:04:23.429
get my head around how to use it properly. Yeah,

01:04:23.469 --> 01:04:26.130
and it's not like a huge long one. It's probably

01:04:26.130 --> 01:04:28.349
about three or four feet long. Yeah. But it's

01:04:28.349 --> 01:04:30.710
quite a hefty one. I think you've given me a

01:04:30.710 --> 01:04:32.610
couple of gentle test whacks with it, and you've

01:04:32.610 --> 01:04:34.849
done a lot of whacking of a cushion. Yeah, yeah.

01:04:35.070 --> 01:04:38.070
More practice needed. Yeah. It just feels a little

01:04:38.070 --> 01:04:41.909
bit unwieldy. Yeah. And a little bit... like

01:04:41.909 --> 01:04:44.869
I wouldn't be able to be as consistent as I feel

01:04:44.869 --> 01:04:47.150
like I should be. Yeah. And I suppose it depends

01:04:47.150 --> 01:04:48.510
where I'm hitting you. If I'm doing it on your

01:04:48.510 --> 01:04:50.989
butt and your thighs, then making sure I hit

01:04:50.989 --> 01:04:54.389
the same spot every time, marginally less important.

01:04:54.829 --> 01:04:57.090
Yeah. But if I'm going to use it like on your

01:04:57.090 --> 01:05:01.329
shoulders, then all the meaty bits of your back,

01:05:01.449 --> 01:05:04.469
then I need to make sure that I can hit you in

01:05:04.469 --> 01:05:07.750
those spots. Yeah. And not the other spots. Yeah.

01:05:07.969 --> 01:05:09.869
But you get on all right with the shambok, which

01:05:09.869 --> 01:05:12.250
is, it's a short whip, but it's a whip. Yeah.

01:05:12.849 --> 01:05:16.730
Yeah. But I think, again, probably because it's

01:05:16.730 --> 01:05:21.250
so short, that feels more like a paddle to me.

01:05:21.730 --> 01:05:25.110
I still want to work out how to use that whip

01:05:25.110 --> 01:05:27.070
because it looks like it would be really fun

01:05:27.070 --> 01:05:29.769
and it's really cool. I would quite like you

01:05:29.769 --> 01:05:31.269
to learn to use it as well because then you might

01:05:31.269 --> 01:05:34.210
use it instead of the shambok and the flick whip.

01:05:35.599 --> 01:05:38.440
And then my life will be slightly better because

01:05:38.440 --> 01:05:40.619
it's a bit of a heavier leather one. So it's

01:05:40.619 --> 01:05:47.460
a bit thuddier. I doubt that very much. Just

01:05:47.460 --> 01:05:50.619
add it to the list of things to torment you with.

01:05:50.940 --> 01:05:53.639
Yeah. So I'm now going to hand over to you to

01:05:53.639 --> 01:05:56.280
talk about some stuff that I am of minimal use

01:05:56.280 --> 01:05:58.199
on. Do you want to tell us a little bit about

01:05:58.199 --> 01:06:01.460
some technique mix? Oh, yes. That is something

01:06:01.460 --> 01:06:05.250
that I can talk about. and i suppose i should

01:06:05.250 --> 01:06:07.130
preface this by some of what i'm about to say

01:06:07.130 --> 01:06:09.570
i learned from our friend some of it i knew already

01:06:09.570 --> 01:06:12.869
because i'd been hitting people for a while but

01:06:12.869 --> 01:06:15.789
um a friend of ours gave a talk at an event probably

01:06:15.789 --> 01:06:18.230
18 months ago maybe a little bit longer might

01:06:18.230 --> 01:06:21.150
be even longer yeah than that which really just

01:06:21.150 --> 01:06:23.230
distilled some of the stuff that was kind of

01:06:23.230 --> 01:06:26.010
vaguely floating in around in my head about how

01:06:26.010 --> 01:06:28.389
you can use these things Because there are more

01:06:28.389 --> 01:06:30.769
options available to you than just picking it

01:06:30.769 --> 01:06:33.210
up and hitting someone with it. You can get creative

01:06:33.210 --> 01:06:37.150
with the way that you use it. So you talked about

01:06:37.150 --> 01:06:42.429
the Venator paddles that we have. They're a really

01:06:42.429 --> 01:06:45.610
good example of that because they've got like

01:06:45.610 --> 01:06:49.090
six sides to them. If you buy a wooden paddle,

01:06:49.250 --> 01:06:52.610
the obvious thing to do with it is hit someone

01:06:52.610 --> 01:06:56.230
with the wide side of it. But actually, if you

01:06:56.230 --> 01:06:57.949
hit someone with the wide side of it, that will

01:06:57.949 --> 01:07:02.170
more than likely create a slappy kind of feel.

01:07:02.570 --> 01:07:05.449
But if you hit them with the edge of it, it creates

01:07:05.449 --> 01:07:07.809
a really thuddy feel because all of the weight

01:07:07.809 --> 01:07:10.010
is concentrated in a much smaller surface area

01:07:10.010 --> 01:07:14.809
going onto the skin. So it's really fun to kind

01:07:14.809 --> 01:07:17.750
of mix and match with that. And we've got a few

01:07:17.750 --> 01:07:19.650
things where I like to kind of twirl it around

01:07:19.650 --> 01:07:21.929
in my hand and kind of hit you with the different

01:07:21.929 --> 01:07:25.199
sides of it because you're... generally face

01:07:25.199 --> 01:07:28.980
down and facing away from me you you don't know

01:07:28.980 --> 01:07:31.820
what's coming yeah you know so like you mentioned

01:07:31.820 --> 01:07:33.559
with the hammer hitting you with the the ball

01:07:33.559 --> 01:07:36.360
bit of the the hammer and then every now and

01:07:36.360 --> 01:07:38.940
again just slapping you with the side of it is

01:07:38.940 --> 01:07:41.679
is a really fun way to kind of keep it interesting

01:07:41.679 --> 01:07:44.280
for me but also kind of mix it up for you yeah

01:07:44.280 --> 01:07:47.360
uh as well so kind of thinking about all of the

01:07:47.360 --> 01:07:49.199
different angles and the different sides of the

01:07:49.199 --> 01:07:52.659
thing that you are using is is always a good

01:07:52.659 --> 01:07:55.119
thing to do if we've got a club which is not

01:07:55.119 --> 01:07:59.119
not sharp squares but it's mostly square shape

01:07:59.119 --> 01:08:01.960
and and some of it is textured and some of it

01:08:01.960 --> 01:08:03.980
isn't so kind of hitting you with the different

01:08:03.980 --> 01:08:06.699
faces or hitting you with the edge one of the

01:08:06.699 --> 01:08:08.579
one of the corners of the square makes life more

01:08:08.579 --> 01:08:10.860
interesting for both the top and the bottom yeah

01:08:10.860 --> 01:08:12.860
and even like flipping stuff around using the

01:08:12.860 --> 01:08:14.840
handle i remember was something that person mentioned

01:08:14.840 --> 01:08:16.779
during the talk like yeah look at all of your

01:08:16.779 --> 01:08:18.439
toys and look at all of the different ways you

01:08:18.439 --> 01:08:20.439
could hit someone with it and yeah start mixing

01:08:20.439 --> 01:08:25.899
it up Yeah. Yeah. Inspiring stuff. And it takes

01:08:25.899 --> 01:08:27.840
a little bit of practice. It's easier with some

01:08:27.840 --> 01:08:32.260
other things than others than to kind of flip

01:08:32.260 --> 01:08:34.640
them around in your hand quickly enough. Because

01:08:34.640 --> 01:08:36.739
what I like to be able to do is do it in a way

01:08:36.739 --> 01:08:38.359
where you don't know I'm doing it. Sometimes

01:08:38.359 --> 01:08:40.239
with some of the things that we've got, I have

01:08:40.239 --> 01:08:43.340
to stop, turn it and then hit you again. But

01:08:43.340 --> 01:08:46.640
if I get the pace of the hits right, I've got

01:08:46.640 --> 01:08:48.779
enough time. to kind of twirl it around in my

01:08:48.779 --> 01:08:50.859
hand so that you don't notice that it's a different

01:08:50.859 --> 01:08:54.640
period of time in between each. Yeah, one of

01:08:54.640 --> 01:08:57.319
the ones that you are, like, just so mean with.

01:08:57.619 --> 01:08:59.300
I feel like this whole episode is me complaining

01:08:59.300 --> 01:09:01.279
about you being mean. I like mean. Mean is really

01:09:01.279 --> 01:09:04.699
hot. But you are so mean. So we've got a paddle

01:09:04.699 --> 01:09:06.619
that's a resin paddle that has got a couple of

01:09:06.619 --> 01:09:09.159
stress balls set into one side. Yes. So the side

01:09:09.159 --> 01:09:11.260
with the stress balls on, because of the squishiness

01:09:11.260 --> 01:09:12.840
of them, because they're quite big, chunky ones.

01:09:13.479 --> 01:09:16.220
all really thuddy really quite gentle like even

01:09:16.220 --> 01:09:17.960
if you hit full force with that it's never going

01:09:17.960 --> 01:09:19.979
to be unbearably painful it's it's just a really

01:09:19.979 --> 01:09:22.199
nice thing to be hit with yeah but the completely

01:09:22.199 --> 01:09:24.899
flat completely smooth resin side of the paddle

01:09:24.899 --> 01:09:28.359
yeah is awful it's so slappy like resin is a

01:09:28.359 --> 01:09:31.199
particularly nasty material for slappy toys yeah

01:09:31.199 --> 01:09:33.239
so you'll quite often hit me with that and you'll

01:09:33.239 --> 01:09:35.300
be like bop bop bop with the nice side and i'm

01:09:35.300 --> 01:09:37.060
like oh yeah having a great time and then you

01:09:37.060 --> 01:09:38.840
flip it around you're really hard whack with

01:09:38.840 --> 01:09:42.479
the flat resin i'm like what the fuck yeah yeah

01:09:43.860 --> 01:09:47.100
And that toy is really easy to get into that

01:09:47.100 --> 01:09:49.920
rhythm with. So I'm not actually kind of turning

01:09:49.920 --> 01:09:52.859
my wrist when I do it. I'm letting go of it and

01:09:52.859 --> 01:09:56.300
letting it turn in the air and then catching

01:09:56.300 --> 01:09:59.899
it on the way back down. Just like ever so slightly

01:09:59.899 --> 01:10:02.760
kind of loosening my grip so it twists around

01:10:02.760 --> 01:10:04.960
and then bringing it back down again without

01:10:04.960 --> 01:10:07.439
there being any break in the rhythm. Yeah. So

01:10:07.439 --> 01:10:09.399
you don't know what's coming. I don't know what's

01:10:09.399 --> 01:10:14.159
coming, yeah. And that takes some practice because

01:10:14.159 --> 01:10:17.640
obviously it's better for your wrist than doing

01:10:17.640 --> 01:10:23.199
that. We're not a video podcast. Yes, it's better

01:10:23.199 --> 01:10:26.359
for your wrist than doing that. It's better for

01:10:26.359 --> 01:10:28.079
your wrist than kind of keeping a hold of it

01:10:28.079 --> 01:10:29.859
and twisting your wrist every time you want to

01:10:29.859 --> 01:10:32.920
change it. So kind of getting some things you

01:10:32.920 --> 01:10:35.420
can kind of let go of them a little bit, let

01:10:35.420 --> 01:10:36.840
them twist in the air and then catch them on

01:10:36.840 --> 01:10:39.439
the way back down. And you maintain the rhythm.

01:10:39.739 --> 01:10:43.460
Yeah. It's a cool little skill to have. That

01:10:43.460 --> 01:10:45.180
sounds very cool. I'm sad that I don't get to

01:10:45.180 --> 01:10:46.680
watch you doing it because I am pretty much always

01:10:46.680 --> 01:10:48.619
face down or bent over sometimes when I'm watching.

01:10:49.300 --> 01:10:52.000
Yeah. That talk we went to as well, I think I

01:10:52.000 --> 01:10:54.619
remember that you picked up some nasty techniques

01:10:54.619 --> 01:10:57.119
there about even just using the same toy, using

01:10:57.119 --> 01:10:59.119
the same edge of the toy, different ways to hit

01:10:59.119 --> 01:11:03.560
with it. So, like, whether you sort of bring

01:11:03.560 --> 01:11:05.100
it down and straight back up, whether you bring

01:11:05.100 --> 01:11:07.960
it down and drag, that kind of stuff. Yeah, yeah.

01:11:09.319 --> 01:11:11.199
So yeah, the way that you're actually hitting

01:11:11.199 --> 01:11:13.619
someone has an impact on it as well. So yeah,

01:11:13.640 --> 01:11:17.220
kind of, especially with like really heavy things

01:11:17.220 --> 01:11:19.739
or like more thuddy things, bringing it down

01:11:19.739 --> 01:11:23.199
and then really kind of pushing through. So you're

01:11:23.199 --> 01:11:25.899
kind of pushing the thing deeper into the person,

01:11:26.079 --> 01:11:28.899
the effect of the hit, and then kind of immediately

01:11:28.899 --> 01:11:30.420
going, yeah, I'm going to make this a little

01:11:30.420 --> 01:11:33.560
bit worse by really putting my weight down on

01:11:33.560 --> 01:11:37.039
it, as opposed to kind of hitting straight down

01:11:37.039 --> 01:11:39.229
and straight back up again. i feel like is a

01:11:39.229 --> 01:11:44.930
more slappy yeah slappy thing um or um doing

01:11:44.930 --> 01:11:47.310
like a more glancing blow so dragging it across

01:11:47.310 --> 01:11:50.930
your butt rather than straight down onto it um

01:11:50.930 --> 01:11:54.229
i don't know what effect that has actually what

01:11:54.229 --> 01:11:56.050
effect does that have when i'm doing it that

01:11:56.050 --> 01:11:58.529
way it's it depends a lot on the toy so i think

01:11:58.529 --> 01:12:01.010
what you generally do probably without even consciously

01:12:01.010 --> 01:12:02.989
thinking about it at this point is you try a

01:12:02.989 --> 01:12:05.789
few different ways of hitting with a toy yeah

01:12:05.789 --> 01:12:07.689
pay attention to what gets the most noise out

01:12:07.689 --> 01:12:10.890
of me and then keep doing that but i remember

01:12:10.890 --> 01:12:12.729
after we went to that talk because it was a talk

01:12:12.729 --> 01:12:14.430
at the beginning of a play event so we went to

01:12:14.430 --> 01:12:16.770
play afterwards yeah you started hitting me and

01:12:16.770 --> 01:12:19.609
i was like what the fuck did you teach my partner

01:12:19.609 --> 01:12:24.109
the fuck is this i am being tormented in ways

01:12:24.109 --> 01:12:27.930
i did not know were possible and you're already

01:12:27.930 --> 01:12:29.390
pretty good at a lot of that like the stuff we

01:12:29.390 --> 01:12:30.569
talked about earlier where you do the little

01:12:30.569 --> 01:12:32.449
tappy taps with the cane and then do a big whack

01:12:32.449 --> 01:12:34.710
yeah you'd obviously got some of those techniques

01:12:34.710 --> 01:12:36.850
already but i think having someone really lay

01:12:36.850 --> 01:12:39.289
it out and demonstrate it and explain why it

01:12:39.289 --> 01:12:41.829
feels different you just came away with so many

01:12:41.829 --> 01:12:45.310
horrible ideas yes yeah yeah and this is why

01:12:45.310 --> 01:12:48.869
we don't let sadists talk to each other no no

01:12:48.869 --> 01:12:51.800
oh this is why we do to be fair yeah this is

01:12:51.800 --> 01:12:55.439
why we do friends with sadists yeah me and my

01:12:55.439 --> 01:12:57.579
masochist pals all just vibrating while our sadists

01:12:57.579 --> 01:12:59.779
talk to each other like oh yeah we're in so much

01:12:59.779 --> 01:13:04.119
trouble it's gonna be so good but my favorite

01:13:04.119 --> 01:13:07.000
thing to do the the kind of a glancing thing

01:13:07.000 --> 01:13:10.739
um with where i'm kind of scraping it across

01:13:10.739 --> 01:13:13.659
rather than straight down onto you is the little

01:13:13.659 --> 01:13:17.159
cheese grater of course yes that we have uh another

01:13:17.159 --> 01:13:20.899
ikea purchase it's like a little little cheese

01:13:20.899 --> 01:13:24.119
grater with a with a little handle on it so presumably

01:13:24.119 --> 01:13:27.479
for like parmesan i think so yeah like if you're

01:13:27.479 --> 01:13:31.939
wanting to dust parmesan or zest a lime over

01:13:31.939 --> 01:13:35.340
something that's what it's for but i really like

01:13:35.340 --> 01:13:40.979
to kind of swipe it across your ass yeah because

01:13:40.979 --> 01:13:44.199
it's not as effective straight up and down no

01:13:44.199 --> 01:13:46.000
it's just like a little metal paddle at that

01:13:46.000 --> 01:13:48.659
point yeah if you swipe it yeah it's not It's

01:13:48.659 --> 01:13:50.880
not sharp enough to actually grate my butt. This

01:13:50.880 --> 01:13:52.760
is not a toy that's ever made me bleed, I don't

01:13:52.760 --> 01:13:54.619
think. Maybe, like, the tiniest graze, if you're

01:13:54.619 --> 01:13:57.319
really going for it. But it feels abrasive. It

01:13:57.319 --> 01:13:59.500
feels like it could graze. So it's an interesting

01:13:59.500 --> 01:14:03.399
toy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I think one last thing

01:14:03.399 --> 01:14:08.300
that I definitely picked up from that little

01:14:08.300 --> 01:14:12.819
talk was the use of the ends, especially if you've

01:14:12.819 --> 01:14:14.380
got, like, something that's a little bit pointed.

01:14:14.520 --> 01:14:17.149
Yeah. So if you've been... working on a particular

01:14:17.149 --> 01:14:19.390
part of the body, working on your butt with something

01:14:19.390 --> 01:14:23.149
and giving you a rest by kind of poking you with

01:14:23.149 --> 01:14:25.810
the end of it. Yeah. Or is this hurting? Is this

01:14:25.810 --> 01:14:28.810
going to bruise? poke poke poke yeah dig it in

01:14:28.810 --> 01:14:31.609
yeah and i'm not always super responsive to that

01:14:31.609 --> 01:14:34.689
actually during play if i'm either in subspace

01:14:34.689 --> 01:14:36.770
if i'm sort of a little bit blissed out or just

01:14:36.770 --> 01:14:38.970
if i'm not really that sore yet that doesn't

01:14:38.970 --> 01:14:40.470
always get the reaction from me that you want

01:14:40.470 --> 01:14:42.569
and you're poking me going is the pig broken

01:14:42.569 --> 01:14:44.510
it's like no it's just that that's not painful

01:14:44.510 --> 01:14:46.550
but when you really do get a strong reaction

01:14:46.550 --> 01:14:48.569
from that is a few hours after play if i have

01:14:48.569 --> 01:14:50.810
bruised or even if i haven't visibly bruised

01:14:50.810 --> 01:14:52.770
i've often got sort of tender kind of lumpy feeling

01:14:52.770 --> 01:14:55.090
spots and then if you poke one of them i'm like

01:14:55.090 --> 01:14:57.560
ah yes you were really enjoying that after the

01:14:57.560 --> 01:14:59.779
witch trial because i got a giant like black

01:14:59.779 --> 01:15:01.899
bruise on one thigh from being whipped over and

01:15:01.899 --> 01:15:04.659
over again yeah yeah um and a few hours later

01:15:04.659 --> 01:15:07.359
that came up in a big black lump and you spent

01:15:07.359 --> 01:15:09.760
the rest of the weekend anytime you had any kind

01:15:09.760 --> 01:15:13.600
of toy or stick or any kind of item in your hand

01:15:13.600 --> 01:15:16.460
jabbing me with it in the bruise yeah yeah yeah

01:15:16.460 --> 01:15:19.579
or just my my hands just coming up yeah poke

01:15:19.579 --> 01:15:27.170
dig my finger into it yeah for fun But I think

01:15:27.170 --> 01:15:31.449
it's fair to say, isn't it, we tend to do impact

01:15:31.449 --> 01:15:35.329
for one of two reasons, really. One, either because

01:15:35.329 --> 01:15:38.149
we want to turn your brain off with a really

01:15:38.149 --> 01:15:42.350
big, bloody impact scene. Or because I want to

01:15:42.350 --> 01:15:44.510
be really mean to you. Yeah. Or you want me to

01:15:44.510 --> 01:15:46.229
be really mean to you, which is usually more

01:15:46.229 --> 01:15:49.470
kind of stingy and sappy type of things. But

01:15:49.470 --> 01:15:52.149
there is a way of doing impact which is actually

01:15:52.149 --> 01:15:55.659
quite sensual. And it's more about kind of sensation,

01:15:55.859 --> 01:16:00.000
I guess, in a more relaxing way. Isn't there?

01:16:00.039 --> 01:16:02.600
It doesn't have to be kind of big, heavy beatings,

01:16:02.600 --> 01:16:04.560
especially with things like floggers. I think

01:16:04.560 --> 01:16:07.800
kind of people do those in more sensual kind

01:16:07.800 --> 01:16:11.079
of calm ways. Definitely. And this is is not

01:16:11.079 --> 01:16:13.779
our area with impact because. because i like

01:16:13.779 --> 01:16:15.539
it really hard and you like hit me really hard

01:16:15.539 --> 01:16:17.600
and that's the zone we tend to stick in yeah

01:16:17.600 --> 01:16:19.359
but one of the things that's really cool about

01:16:19.359 --> 01:16:22.840
impact is how versatile it is so people doing

01:16:22.840 --> 01:16:25.260
sort of quite long quite gentle flogging sessions

01:16:25.260 --> 01:16:28.420
um people using a big range of toys not so much

01:16:28.420 --> 01:16:30.119
to get a strong reaction out of someone but more

01:16:30.119 --> 01:16:32.699
to get them to experience different textures

01:16:32.699 --> 01:16:34.420
and different amounts of pressure and things

01:16:34.420 --> 01:16:36.840
like that it's it doesn't always have to be about

01:16:36.840 --> 01:16:38.819
causing pain it can sometimes just be a way of

01:16:38.819 --> 01:16:40.340
exploring the different sensations that your

01:16:40.340 --> 01:16:43.119
body can have yeah um I've just diverted straight

01:16:43.119 --> 01:16:44.600
past all of that and gone straight into just

01:16:44.600 --> 01:16:47.840
hit me with your car. Yes. But for a lot of people,

01:16:47.859 --> 01:16:50.260
that is the point of impact. It doesn't always

01:16:50.260 --> 01:16:52.520
have to be like there's this perception that

01:16:52.520 --> 01:16:54.479
kink is all about violence. And then people come

01:16:54.479 --> 01:16:56.100
and listen to us and get the perception that

01:16:56.100 --> 01:16:57.680
kink is all about violence because we fucking

01:16:57.680 --> 01:17:00.800
love some violence. Yeah. But there are so many

01:17:00.800 --> 01:17:03.979
versions of even the stuff that we can do in

01:17:03.979 --> 01:17:05.760
quite a violent way that you can do in a way

01:17:05.760 --> 01:17:07.699
that really isn't. Hitting doesn't have to be

01:17:07.699 --> 01:17:10.079
about causing pain. Hitting is just about having

01:17:10.079 --> 01:17:16.079
an impact. Yeah. I agree. Very well put. Well,

01:17:16.159 --> 01:17:19.380
we've spent a lot of time today talking about

01:17:19.380 --> 01:17:23.060
objects that you can use to hit people with,

01:17:23.100 --> 01:17:26.699
objects to use as part of impact play. But another

01:17:26.699 --> 01:17:29.939
part of impact play that we do quite a lot is

01:17:29.939 --> 01:17:32.159
kind of face slapping. Yeah. Or slapping generally.

01:17:32.380 --> 01:17:34.340
Slapping generally. You discovered stomach slapping

01:17:34.340 --> 01:17:36.859
recently. Yes, I did. An awful and intriguing

01:17:36.859 --> 01:17:40.859
discovery. Yes. But yes, face slapping we do

01:17:40.859 --> 01:17:44.340
like. Yes. Tell us about that. Yeah. Face slapping

01:17:44.340 --> 01:17:46.239
is, I think I mentioned it earlier on, is one

01:17:46.239 --> 01:17:48.779
of my sort of like starter kit kinks that I had

01:17:48.779 --> 01:17:50.500
when I started exploring properly in my early

01:17:50.500 --> 01:17:52.699
30s. Yeah. Was I knew I wanted to get slapped

01:17:52.699 --> 01:17:56.079
around the face. And I have continued to love

01:17:56.079 --> 01:17:59.180
it ever since. It's not dropped out of the list

01:17:59.180 --> 01:18:01.359
of things that I really like. I think particularly

01:18:01.359 --> 01:18:05.079
with any type of CNC play, especially rape play,

01:18:05.140 --> 01:18:07.020
but not exclusively like if you're doing sort

01:18:07.020 --> 01:18:09.819
of an interrogation or a beating where I'm pretending

01:18:09.819 --> 01:18:12.250
I don't want it. pausing to slap me across the

01:18:12.250 --> 01:18:15.430
face it's just so personal yeah it's similar

01:18:15.430 --> 01:18:16.909
to what i was talking about with spanking earlier

01:18:16.909 --> 01:18:19.670
but in a very different way it's so up close

01:18:19.670 --> 01:18:22.890
and personal it feels i've just been saying kink

01:18:22.890 --> 01:18:24.489
doesn't have to be violent but it feels really

01:18:24.489 --> 01:18:26.850
fucking violent yeah it feels more violent than

01:18:26.850 --> 01:18:29.369
a lot of more extreme violence that we do um

01:18:29.369 --> 01:18:33.350
because it is such a personal attack i think

01:18:33.350 --> 01:18:35.210
there's a very natural panic response that happens

01:18:35.210 --> 01:18:38.729
when you get hit in the face as well it's a very

01:18:38.729 --> 01:18:41.789
instinctive feeling that you are in danger and

01:18:41.789 --> 01:18:43.989
feeling that your boundaries have been violated

01:18:43.989 --> 01:18:45.930
in some way and it's very shocking and it's very

01:18:45.930 --> 01:18:48.489
sudden um and all of that makes it really exciting

01:18:48.489 --> 01:18:51.170
to me it sort of ties together masochism and

01:18:51.170 --> 01:18:54.590
fear play and cnc and all of that stuff that

01:18:54.590 --> 01:18:57.550
i really like yeah um so i'm a big fan of a good

01:18:57.550 --> 01:18:59.810
slap around the face and i do like being punched

01:18:59.810 --> 01:19:02.630
in the face as well which is generally considerably

01:19:02.630 --> 01:19:05.609
more risky however cautious you are with it that

01:19:05.609 --> 01:19:08.520
is a a higher risk one but there is something

01:19:08.520 --> 01:19:12.359
so just viscerally evil about being punched in

01:19:12.359 --> 01:19:15.539
the face that just goes straight to my clit i'm

01:19:15.539 --> 01:19:20.359
so here for it filthy little pervert yeah yeah

01:19:20.890 --> 01:19:23.430
um but there are risks with any kind of facial

01:19:23.430 --> 01:19:25.850
impact i think like with a lot of stuff that

01:19:25.850 --> 01:19:27.789
gets lumped into the sort of starter kit of kinks

01:19:27.789 --> 01:19:29.569
i mentioned that one of mine in my starter kit

01:19:29.569 --> 01:19:31.550
was being choked which isn't something i do anymore

01:19:31.550 --> 01:19:33.970
yeah i'll quite happily get waterboarded i will

01:19:33.970 --> 01:19:35.810
get bagged but i don't let people strangle me

01:19:35.810 --> 01:19:38.050
because it's so dangerous but people put it in

01:19:38.050 --> 01:19:40.409
that well it's almost vanilla isn't it box and

01:19:40.409 --> 01:19:42.250
face slapping is another one that's nowhere near

01:19:42.250 --> 01:19:44.909
as dangerous as choking in my opinion but it's

01:19:44.909 --> 01:19:47.329
not as safe as people think it is yeah it's not

01:19:47.329 --> 01:19:49.050
something i would necessarily say is where you

01:19:49.050 --> 01:19:51.260
should start with any kind of hitting like the

01:19:51.260 --> 01:19:54.159
face is a high risk area you've got your mouth

01:19:54.159 --> 01:19:56.739
there all of your teeth all of your lips all

01:19:56.739 --> 01:19:58.899
of your lips all of your lips yes you've got

01:19:58.899 --> 01:20:00.619
your nose which is a delicate facial structure

01:20:00.619 --> 01:20:03.020
you've got your eyes which are incredibly delicate

01:20:03.020 --> 01:20:06.100
you've got your ears as well yeah and you've

01:20:06.100 --> 01:20:08.159
got the risk of head injury less likely from

01:20:08.159 --> 01:20:10.760
slapping than punching but you're still if your

01:20:10.760 --> 01:20:12.340
head's not supported and it's getting jolted

01:20:12.340 --> 01:20:13.960
around anything that rattles your brain is bad

01:20:13.960 --> 01:20:16.380
news yeah you can get neck injuries as a result

01:20:16.380 --> 01:20:18.630
of that there's just every part of your head

01:20:18.630 --> 01:20:21.550
and face and your neck are these fragile structures

01:20:21.550 --> 01:20:23.369
that are really vital to you living your day

01:20:23.369 --> 01:20:25.409
-to -day life so it is worth approaching with

01:20:25.409 --> 01:20:28.930
a little bit of caution yeah yeah but we do like

01:20:28.930 --> 01:20:30.670
a bit of face that thing don't we we really do

01:20:30.670 --> 01:20:32.590
make and we try and mitigate some of that and

01:20:32.590 --> 01:20:36.689
we have tried me and you have tried some very

01:20:36.689 --> 01:20:40.529
light punching yeah but i i think i am i'm a

01:20:40.529 --> 01:20:43.449
little bit afraid of that yeah i've done it more

01:20:43.449 --> 01:20:47.289
in the past with hope because hope has a combination

01:20:47.289 --> 01:20:50.449
of a background in boxing so she really knows

01:20:50.449 --> 01:20:54.689
how to aim a punch and yeah what happens when

01:20:54.689 --> 01:20:57.430
you punch someone and she also has some level

01:20:57.430 --> 01:21:00.069
of medical training yeah um so knows what to

01:21:00.069 --> 01:21:02.569
do if that goes wrong so that gave her a lot

01:21:02.569 --> 01:21:04.229
of confidence with it and therefore me quite

01:21:04.229 --> 01:21:06.029
a lot of confidence with letting her do it i

01:21:06.029 --> 01:21:07.729
trust you enough to let you do it but i don't

01:21:07.729 --> 01:21:10.090
think you quite trust yourself enough to go beyond

01:21:10.090 --> 01:21:13.880
what we've done no and i have I had two concussions

01:21:13.880 --> 01:21:15.539
in the past from asking people to punch me in

01:21:15.539 --> 01:21:18.039
the face. So even when you do everything right,

01:21:18.180 --> 01:21:20.000
it can still go wrong. It can still go wrong.

01:21:20.100 --> 01:21:22.380
Yeah, yeah. But we do do quite a lot of face

01:21:22.380 --> 01:21:25.340
slapping, don't we? And I think for similar reasons

01:21:25.340 --> 01:21:27.479
to you, there is just something, there's almost

01:21:27.479 --> 01:21:29.680
something a little bit taboo about it. Yeah.

01:21:30.539 --> 01:21:32.699
Is slapping someone across the face. It feels

01:21:32.699 --> 01:21:37.420
like such a personal attack, but also such an

01:21:37.420 --> 01:21:41.500
effective thing as well. Yeah. Like the, it is.

01:21:42.780 --> 01:21:47.020
It is shockingly easy to make you cry with slapping

01:21:47.020 --> 01:21:49.600
you. Yeah. Yeah, it is. Because it just makes

01:21:49.600 --> 01:21:52.439
your eyes water anyway. And because it's so shocking

01:21:52.439 --> 01:21:54.859
as well, it's a really good shortcut if we want

01:21:54.859 --> 01:21:58.960
some tears in a scene. Yes. Yeah. But we do try

01:21:58.960 --> 01:22:02.920
and mitigate the great long list of risks that

01:22:02.920 --> 01:22:06.640
you described. So generally speaking, I will

01:22:06.640 --> 01:22:09.399
grab a hold of your head on one side and I will

01:22:09.399 --> 01:22:11.720
slap you on the other side. So usually I will

01:22:11.720 --> 01:22:13.920
grab your head with my left hand and hit you

01:22:13.920 --> 01:22:16.539
with my right hand. I am generally pretty good

01:22:16.539 --> 01:22:20.399
at aiming into the fleshy bit of your cheeks,

01:22:20.579 --> 01:22:22.060
but there has been a couple of times where I've

01:22:22.060 --> 01:22:24.800
got that wrong. Yeah, and it is rare. I think

01:22:24.800 --> 01:22:27.420
the most sort of major one was a time when I

01:22:27.420 --> 01:22:28.920
was hooded so you couldn't actually see where

01:22:28.920 --> 01:22:30.840
you were hitting, which was definitely a learning

01:22:30.840 --> 01:22:33.960
experience for us. Not that we've never done

01:22:33.960 --> 01:22:36.100
that again, but we do it with a lot more caution

01:22:36.100 --> 01:22:37.600
now and you make sure you know exactly where

01:22:37.600 --> 01:22:39.520
all of the bits are because that was the time

01:22:39.520 --> 01:22:42.350
that you... went too far back and hit me directly

01:22:42.350 --> 01:22:44.689
in the ear instead of across the cheek and i

01:22:44.689 --> 01:22:47.550
got a minor and completely healed with no problems

01:22:47.550 --> 01:22:50.989
eardrum rupture which is horrible horrible for

01:22:50.989 --> 01:22:53.210
you i think more horrible for you yeah i was

01:22:53.210 --> 01:22:54.750
like okay so my ear's ringing a bit and it's

01:22:54.750 --> 01:22:56.909
sore but google says this will probably heal

01:22:56.909 --> 01:22:59.329
up in a few days no bother i'm not stressed but

01:22:59.329 --> 01:23:05.310
you were like crashing out yeah i was yeah yes

01:23:06.550 --> 01:23:09.630
which i think is the appropriate response i get

01:23:09.630 --> 01:23:12.430
that i would be the same to be fair um but i

01:23:12.430 --> 01:23:14.050
felt really bad for you because it really wasn't

01:23:14.050 --> 01:23:16.250
a big deal yeah you know these things happen

01:23:16.250 --> 01:23:18.550
if you enjoy getting it in the face there is

01:23:18.550 --> 01:23:20.689
a risk of stuff going wrong and you kind of accept

01:23:20.689 --> 01:23:22.529
that when you get into it you hadn't done it

01:23:22.529 --> 01:23:24.229
on purpose you hadn't been stupid and reckless

01:23:24.229 --> 01:23:26.729
we maybe hadn't thought through the potential

01:23:26.729 --> 01:23:28.670
added risk of having a hood on but i hadn't thought

01:23:28.670 --> 01:23:30.850
about that either and personal responsibility

01:23:30.850 --> 01:23:32.770
is a thing i could have said that's too risky

01:23:32.770 --> 01:23:35.979
i'm not doing it and i didn't um And we learned.

01:23:36.800 --> 01:23:40.340
Yeah. Yeah. But it is something we enjoy doing.

01:23:40.619 --> 01:23:42.659
Very much. We do very much enjoy slapping you

01:23:42.659 --> 01:23:47.420
around the face. Yeah. Yeah. I think the risks

01:23:47.420 --> 01:23:51.329
of slapping are not... not small risks but they're

01:23:51.329 --> 01:23:54.069
also not too high to mitigate and to accept a

01:23:54.069 --> 01:23:56.350
certain level of risk the really important thing

01:23:56.350 --> 01:23:58.310
is making sure to avoid getting hit in the eye

01:23:58.310 --> 01:24:01.289
that's the most delicate place and it's not particularly

01:24:01.289 --> 01:24:03.390
hard to detach a retina someone that i used to

01:24:03.390 --> 01:24:05.609
work with got a detached retina from playing

01:24:05.609 --> 01:24:07.550
with her dog and her dog hit her in the eye with

01:24:07.550 --> 01:24:09.930
its paw like not even straight on in the eye

01:24:09.930 --> 01:24:11.609
just like on the edge of her eye socket and then

01:24:11.609 --> 01:24:14.210
she didn't think anything of it at the time and

01:24:14.210 --> 01:24:15.649
then a few days later her vision started going

01:24:15.649 --> 01:24:17.250
blurry went to the doctor and she had a detached

01:24:17.250 --> 01:24:20.449
retina so that has always terrified me so not

01:24:20.449 --> 01:24:22.149
getting hit in the eye is the most important

01:24:22.149 --> 01:24:24.359
bit If you're going to get hit anywhere, you

01:24:24.359 --> 01:24:26.020
shouldn't be hit in the face. That's the one

01:24:26.020 --> 01:24:29.420
to try to avoid. I've had missed hits sort of

01:24:29.420 --> 01:24:31.380
get my nose and I've never broken my nose yet.

01:24:31.960 --> 01:24:33.779
I've had missed hits get my mouth and I've split

01:24:33.779 --> 01:24:37.159
my lip, which I find very sexy, actually. But

01:24:37.159 --> 01:24:39.579
I've never had any tooth damage from it. And

01:24:39.579 --> 01:24:41.119
we've had the missed hit hitting me in the ear.

01:24:41.529 --> 01:24:44.770
Yeah. Punching is where it gets riskier. I think

01:24:44.770 --> 01:24:46.970
the reason I ended up with concussion was largely

01:24:46.970 --> 01:24:49.510
my fault because I really wanted a black eye

01:24:49.510 --> 01:24:51.350
and I'd done quite a lot of being punched in

01:24:51.350 --> 01:24:53.329
the face and I hadn't had a black eye and I was

01:24:53.329 --> 01:24:55.810
getting sick of it. Like it is, you should never

01:24:55.810 --> 01:24:58.569
play for bruises, but when you never really bruise,

01:24:58.630 --> 01:25:01.050
it is so fucking annoying. You're like, I did

01:25:01.050 --> 01:25:03.210
all this really cool stuff and there's no evidence

01:25:03.210 --> 01:25:05.970
of it. The fuck is this? So I was continuously

01:25:05.970 --> 01:25:07.710
getting hit harder and harder and harder trying

01:25:07.710 --> 01:25:10.930
to get a black eye. the person that I was doing

01:25:10.930 --> 01:25:13.890
this with said, I think I'm hitting you hard

01:25:13.890 --> 01:25:17.529
enough now that this could be a risk for a concussion

01:25:17.529 --> 01:25:18.909
and I don't really want to hit you any harder.

01:25:19.250 --> 01:25:21.250
And I was like, can we just do a little bit harder?

01:25:21.409 --> 01:25:23.869
Just a little bit. So I can see if I can get

01:25:23.869 --> 01:25:26.470
a black eye. And I got a concussion. And the

01:25:26.470 --> 01:25:28.449
second time was pushing at that line again. So

01:25:28.449 --> 01:25:30.149
it turns out basically my concussion threshold

01:25:30.149 --> 01:25:32.149
is lower than my black eye threshold. I was just

01:25:32.149 --> 01:25:34.310
about to ask, did you get a black eye? No, no

01:25:34.310 --> 01:25:36.409
mix. I've still never had a black eye. Oh no,

01:25:36.569 --> 01:25:40.090
that's terrible. And I am unlikely to be able

01:25:40.090 --> 01:25:43.770
to deliver one to you because I don't think I

01:25:43.770 --> 01:25:47.529
feel, unless I do boxing training and medical

01:25:47.529 --> 01:25:50.050
training. I don't think I can safely get one.

01:25:50.130 --> 01:25:51.829
I think that was the lesson from that is both

01:25:51.829 --> 01:25:53.750
times I've attempted it, I've ended up with concussion

01:25:53.750 --> 01:25:55.989
and no black eye. So I think I just don't bruise

01:25:55.989 --> 01:25:59.310
that way. Yeah. Not without like a potentially

01:25:59.310 --> 01:26:02.029
life -changing injury. So let's not. Let's not

01:26:02.029 --> 01:26:06.210
do that. No, no. Well, while we're on the topic

01:26:06.210 --> 01:26:08.850
of safety. We should probably talk about some

01:26:08.850 --> 01:26:10.909
safety. We should talk about some safety, yeah.

01:26:11.229 --> 01:26:16.310
Yeah. If you get hit, it can be dangerous. Good

01:26:16.310 --> 01:26:26.170
talk. See you next time. So the first thing is

01:26:26.170 --> 01:26:30.409
thinking about where to hit someone, particularly

01:26:30.409 --> 01:26:34.050
if you're using impact toys or impact tools or

01:26:34.050 --> 01:26:36.210
whatever word you want to use to describe them.

01:26:37.760 --> 01:26:40.439
But it's a slightly weird one, isn't it? Because

01:26:40.439 --> 01:26:42.699
the topic of what are the good areas and bad

01:26:42.699 --> 01:26:45.640
areas to hit someone, there isn't like a universal

01:26:45.640 --> 01:26:48.899
truth on that. No, pretty much everyone's agreed

01:26:48.899 --> 01:26:51.560
the but is fine. Yeah. And once you move anywhere

01:26:51.560 --> 01:26:53.399
other than the but, everyone's got their own

01:26:53.399 --> 01:26:56.020
take on it. Their own thoughts on it. So this

01:26:56.020 --> 01:26:59.579
is not necessarily the gospel truth, but this

01:26:59.579 --> 01:27:03.079
is what makes most sense to me. So generally

01:27:03.079 --> 01:27:06.289
speaking... The meatier an area is, the safer

01:27:06.289 --> 01:27:12.869
it is to hit someone. But thighs, all around

01:27:12.869 --> 01:27:17.689
the thighs, if you've got squishy bits on your

01:27:17.689 --> 01:27:23.670
back, around your shoulders, are generally okay

01:27:23.670 --> 01:27:26.670
places to hit. Yeah. Yeah, so that's very dependent

01:27:26.670 --> 01:27:28.630
on how much muscle and fat you've got there.

01:27:28.850 --> 01:27:30.689
So when I first got into kink, I was quite a

01:27:30.689 --> 01:27:32.729
lot skinnier and I don't know if it was necessarily

01:27:32.729 --> 01:27:34.850
dangerous, but it did not feel particularly safe

01:27:34.850 --> 01:27:36.630
getting hit in the back and it was very intensely

01:27:36.630 --> 01:27:40.130
painful. So I did almost none. And then as I've

01:27:40.130 --> 01:27:41.850
gained weight, I found I can take a fair bit

01:27:41.850 --> 01:27:44.489
across, like not down the spine, but across like

01:27:44.489 --> 01:27:49.390
the meaty upper back area. Yeah, yeah. And the

01:27:49.390 --> 01:27:52.649
reverse of that is the bonier an area is, the

01:27:52.649 --> 01:27:55.550
more carefully you have to tread. Yeah. And I'm

01:27:55.550 --> 01:27:58.149
being quite specific there, which might be a

01:27:58.149 --> 01:28:01.489
departure from the gospel truth. Because I think

01:28:01.489 --> 01:28:03.649
it's not just about the meatiness of the person,

01:28:03.689 --> 01:28:05.090
it is about the thing that you're hitting them

01:28:05.090 --> 01:28:08.369
with. Yeah. So we've got a really, really heavy

01:28:08.369 --> 01:28:13.149
wooden club that I would not put anywhere near

01:28:13.149 --> 01:28:17.430
any part of you which is bony. Yeah. But when

01:28:17.430 --> 01:28:21.310
we did the witch trial interrogation at camping...

01:28:21.760 --> 01:28:24.539
I was wailing on your back with a thin rubber

01:28:24.539 --> 01:28:30.100
strap. Yeah. And that's... Well, it wasn't pleasant.

01:28:30.899 --> 01:28:33.039
It definitely wasn't pleasant, but it didn't

01:28:33.039 --> 01:28:35.100
feel unsafe. But it wasn't unsafe either. Yeah.

01:28:36.380 --> 01:28:38.680
But generally speaking, the bonier an area is,

01:28:38.779 --> 01:28:43.000
the wider a berth you should give it. So down

01:28:43.000 --> 01:28:46.399
your spine, on any of your joints, on the fronts

01:28:46.399 --> 01:28:53.319
of your shins, hands and feet. We've just talked

01:28:53.319 --> 01:28:55.140
about your head as well, kind of if you're going

01:28:55.140 --> 01:28:57.859
to do slapping or punching, be very, very careful

01:28:57.859 --> 01:29:00.760
about where and how you're doing that. I don't

01:29:00.760 --> 01:29:02.520
think I would ever hit you in the face with an

01:29:02.520 --> 01:29:07.859
impact. toy no i think the kinds of things that

01:29:07.859 --> 01:29:09.300
you would have enough control over to hit the

01:29:09.300 --> 01:29:11.640
right spots would be too heavy yeah and the kind

01:29:11.640 --> 01:29:13.539
of things that would be light enough to be safe

01:29:13.539 --> 01:29:15.180
on the right spots there'd be a good chance of

01:29:15.180 --> 01:29:17.300
going in the wrong spots yeah so something like

01:29:17.300 --> 01:29:18.840
that little rubber strap that you love to whack

01:29:18.840 --> 01:29:20.899
me with would be safe across my cheek but the

01:29:20.899 --> 01:29:23.439
chances of it hitting my eye are way too high

01:29:23.439 --> 01:29:29.560
yeah yeah yeah um leaving the kidney areas alone

01:29:30.600 --> 01:29:33.399
generally probably a good idea yeah it's an interesting

01:29:33.399 --> 01:29:35.180
one because when i first got into kink that was

01:29:35.180 --> 01:29:37.560
basically treated as absolute gospel from everyone

01:29:37.560 --> 01:29:39.220
i spoke to like if you hit someone across the

01:29:39.220 --> 01:29:41.020
kidneys you might as well be trying to kill them

01:29:41.020 --> 01:29:43.880
it is just so dangerous um and then i've talked

01:29:43.880 --> 01:29:46.520
to other people um and people with like backgrounds

01:29:46.520 --> 01:29:48.539
in contact sports and historical reenactment

01:29:48.539 --> 01:29:50.479
and stuff who are like no whacking someone across

01:29:50.479 --> 01:29:52.699
the kidneys is absolutely fine like they're well

01:29:52.699 --> 01:29:56.579
protected crack on but given that it is debatable

01:29:56.579 --> 01:29:58.600
and if it does go wrong the consequences can

01:29:58.600 --> 01:30:01.140
be really major And I've had some issues with

01:30:01.140 --> 01:30:03.000
my kidneys in the past. I'm just like, leave

01:30:03.000 --> 01:30:06.479
that area alone. We stay above. And particularly

01:30:06.479 --> 01:30:09.300
being careful down the spine itself and being

01:30:09.300 --> 01:30:11.260
really, really careful in the lower back area,

01:30:11.319 --> 01:30:13.119
actually a little bit below the kidneys because

01:30:13.119 --> 01:30:15.659
it's so bony. You've got your coccyx there. If

01:30:15.659 --> 01:30:17.600
you go down sort of into the butt crack, you've

01:30:17.600 --> 01:30:19.920
got the kind of crest of your hips, which aren't

01:30:19.920 --> 01:30:22.180
particularly fragile bone, but... but they're

01:30:22.180 --> 01:30:23.899
jutting right out. If anything's going to get

01:30:23.899 --> 01:30:26.640
damaged, they're right there. So the lower back

01:30:26.640 --> 01:30:29.720
and, debatably, the mid -back are to be avoided,

01:30:29.739 --> 01:30:32.039
but the upper back, avoiding the spine, is a

01:30:32.039 --> 01:30:35.039
good place. Yeah, yeah. And I have a thing that

01:30:35.039 --> 01:30:39.579
I do to try and avoid your coccyx area, where

01:30:39.579 --> 01:30:43.060
your butt meets your back. That's generally where

01:30:43.060 --> 01:30:46.659
I will put my hand if I'm doing impact on your

01:30:46.659 --> 01:30:49.279
butt, so I stay in the right zone. But also,

01:30:49.359 --> 01:30:52.100
if I'm using something like the hammer, Which

01:30:52.100 --> 01:30:55.680
is not going across the whole of your butt. Because

01:30:55.680 --> 01:30:58.100
it's not big enough. The hammer is not big enough.

01:31:01.800 --> 01:31:03.859
Then kind of making sure that I'm right in the

01:31:03.859 --> 01:31:06.560
bottom of your butt. Yeah. Almost like I'm coming

01:31:06.560 --> 01:31:09.100
up your body rather than straight down onto it.

01:31:09.239 --> 01:31:12.760
Yeah. Is generally a good way to kind of avoid

01:31:12.760 --> 01:31:18.010
those. Fairly strong, but if they break. pretty

01:31:18.010 --> 01:31:21.430
catastrophic uh bones yeah the heavier the toy

01:31:21.430 --> 01:31:23.010
the more squish you want to try to get underneath

01:31:23.010 --> 01:31:25.789
it for sure yeah um and people always talk about

01:31:25.789 --> 01:31:27.729
the butt is safe to hit but really specifically

01:31:27.729 --> 01:31:30.470
like the lower half of the butt and not in the

01:31:30.470 --> 01:31:32.829
butt crack so if you hit someone in the butt

01:31:32.829 --> 01:31:34.289
crack you've got a high chance of getting the

01:31:34.289 --> 01:31:37.210
coccyx you've got a chance of damaging like their

01:31:37.210 --> 01:31:39.369
butthole you know if you get a toy right down

01:31:39.369 --> 01:31:40.689
there you could tear them up in a place they

01:31:40.689 --> 01:31:42.409
really don't want to be torn up or maybe they

01:31:42.409 --> 01:31:45.340
do No judging. So you try to avoid going down

01:31:45.340 --> 01:31:47.420
the butt crack, but also at the top half of the

01:31:47.420 --> 01:31:50.859
butt is where you could get the lower part of

01:31:50.859 --> 01:31:52.279
the spine as well. You can get the hip bones,

01:31:52.380 --> 01:31:54.380
things like that. So keeping it in that meaty,

01:31:54.380 --> 01:31:57.699
squishy area. I think it's really important for

01:31:57.699 --> 01:31:59.319
bottoms not to be afraid to speak up as well

01:31:59.319 --> 01:32:00.819
if something either doesn't feel right or they

01:32:00.819 --> 01:32:03.779
spot something that they know isn't right. I've

01:32:03.779 --> 01:32:07.199
had this before with a previous partner. podcast

01:32:07.199 --> 01:32:09.720
guest hope she would never um someone before

01:32:09.720 --> 01:32:12.460
that who was hitting me really hard across the

01:32:12.460 --> 01:32:14.460
kidneys with a flogger and like i just said the

01:32:14.460 --> 01:32:16.619
kidney thing is a little bit debatable but given

01:32:16.619 --> 01:32:18.180
that it's debatable i shouldn't have just been

01:32:18.180 --> 01:32:20.399
happening without any discussion about our risk

01:32:20.399 --> 01:32:22.960
profiles first and i piped up and said that doesn't

01:32:22.960 --> 01:32:24.979
feel safe you're hitting me in the kidneys and

01:32:24.979 --> 01:32:27.300
that person was really defensive and was like

01:32:27.300 --> 01:32:29.260
well i've never heard anything about that being

01:32:29.260 --> 01:32:32.359
a problem i think it's fine and it's like no

01:32:32.359 --> 01:32:34.579
no definitely not because we haven't discussed

01:32:34.579 --> 01:32:37.420
this i think it's a risk there's plenty of other

01:32:37.420 --> 01:32:40.119
places to hit me that's not on so i will always

01:32:40.119 --> 01:32:41.800
pipe up and sometimes it's just that someone

01:32:41.800 --> 01:32:44.359
accidentally misses a spot or they've drift yeah

01:32:44.359 --> 01:32:47.479
or they've drifted um yeah so i've i've mentioned

01:32:47.479 --> 01:32:48.819
that to you a couple of times where you're not

01:32:48.819 --> 01:32:50.640
doing anything catastrophically dangerous but

01:32:50.640 --> 01:32:52.220
you're just sort of gradually drifting up my

01:32:52.220 --> 01:32:54.039
butt a little bit and i'll say that's feeling

01:32:54.039 --> 01:32:55.659
a little bit high for this toy mix and you're

01:32:55.659 --> 01:32:57.640
like oops sorry and you budge back down yeah

01:32:57.640 --> 01:33:00.659
i think bottoms sometimes feel like you're not

01:33:00.659 --> 01:33:02.859
a proper submissive or you're not bottoming correctly

01:33:03.630 --> 01:33:06.130
Or you're not a hard enough masochist if you

01:33:06.130 --> 01:33:08.149
offer any kind of correction to the top or they'll

01:33:08.149 --> 01:33:10.750
say it's topping from the bottom. And it's absolutely

01:33:10.750 --> 01:33:12.689
not. I mean, I don't like that term anyway. I

01:33:12.689 --> 01:33:14.649
don't know. I struggle to think of anything that

01:33:14.649 --> 01:33:16.789
I think that's a reasonable criticism of. But

01:33:16.789 --> 01:33:19.409
advocating for your own safety definitely isn't

01:33:19.409 --> 01:33:21.350
topping from the bottom. That is just advocating

01:33:21.350 --> 01:33:23.670
for your safety. If something doesn't feel like

01:33:23.670 --> 01:33:27.869
it's quite right, pipe up. Yeah. Yeah. Topping

01:33:27.869 --> 01:33:30.869
from the bottom is such a weird phrase to me.

01:33:31.800 --> 01:33:33.859
what submissives with opinions and desires of

01:33:33.859 --> 01:33:40.039
their own what can't be having that and yeah

01:33:40.039 --> 01:33:41.640
there's been a good few times where you've given

01:33:41.640 --> 01:33:43.659
me that kind of feedback of well that's a little

01:33:43.659 --> 01:33:46.079
bit high or that's a little bit low or whatever

01:33:46.079 --> 01:33:47.760
it's like like you say kind of if i'm drifting

01:33:47.760 --> 01:33:50.960
up your butt before or if i'm drifting too far

01:33:50.960 --> 01:33:54.119
down the back of your thighs yeah because like

01:33:54.119 --> 01:33:56.380
the the thighs are a really good place for for

01:33:56.380 --> 01:33:59.869
a lot of a lot of things but like if you go too

01:33:59.869 --> 01:34:02.010
far down you start to get into the tendons that

01:34:02.010 --> 01:34:04.369
connect to your knees yeah it's a really common

01:34:04.369 --> 01:34:07.250
sort of thing that people don't think about is

01:34:07.250 --> 01:34:09.430
the backs of the knees a lot of people will realize

01:34:09.430 --> 01:34:11.210
you shouldn't hit directly into the knee joint

01:34:11.210 --> 01:34:14.050
itself but not realizing quite how much of your

01:34:14.050 --> 01:34:16.010
leg actually counts as knee joint because there's

01:34:16.010 --> 01:34:17.689
so much tendon there there's a lot of nerves

01:34:17.689 --> 01:34:19.789
that run really near the surface there i like

01:34:19.789 --> 01:34:21.930
to try to leave six clear inches above my knee

01:34:21.930 --> 01:34:25.050
yeah at the back especially yeah i feel like

01:34:25.050 --> 01:34:26.250
you've probably got a little bit more wiggle

01:34:26.250 --> 01:34:28.789
room at the front but at the back that's where

01:34:28.789 --> 01:34:31.489
all of the action is happening yeah um so i like

01:34:31.489 --> 01:34:33.630
to try to not get hit less than six inches from

01:34:33.630 --> 01:34:36.529
the actual fold of my knee joint yeah um and

01:34:36.529 --> 01:34:38.109
that's sometimes hard to gauge especially if

01:34:38.109 --> 01:34:39.789
i'm wiggling about so i will sometimes say to

01:34:39.789 --> 01:34:42.210
you can come up with a little bit please yeah

01:34:42.210 --> 01:34:45.470
yeah yeah yeah and that's obviously a good thing

01:34:45.470 --> 01:34:48.010
because i don't want to damage you in an unfun

01:34:48.010 --> 01:34:51.109
way yeah you know we're only only for only here

01:34:51.109 --> 01:34:56.659
for fun damage We do like some fun damage. Yes.

01:34:58.140 --> 01:34:59.880
Feet are another one to be careful of as well,

01:34:59.920 --> 01:35:01.779
much as I've just been piping up repeatedly about

01:35:01.779 --> 01:35:04.659
how much I fucking love Bastinado. Like the feet

01:35:04.659 --> 01:35:07.199
are full of bones, nerves, delicate little joints.

01:35:07.520 --> 01:35:10.220
And that's sort of probably our only exception

01:35:10.220 --> 01:35:14.560
to... like not avoiding directly hitting bony

01:35:14.560 --> 01:35:16.640
areas because we do like to go for the soles

01:35:16.640 --> 01:35:18.520
of the feet but we only do the soles never the

01:35:18.520 --> 01:35:21.380
tops um and we use very lightweight stuff there

01:35:21.380 --> 01:35:24.100
so generally canes and you've used you've definitely

01:35:24.100 --> 01:35:26.020
used the evil one on my feet before which i was

01:35:26.020 --> 01:35:29.380
not a fan of but safety wise absolutely fine

01:35:29.380 --> 01:35:31.340
lightweight rubber toys like that as long as

01:35:31.340 --> 01:35:34.659
you're not absolutely belting it out full force

01:35:34.659 --> 01:35:37.939
yeah then you can do that yeah but and i think

01:35:37.939 --> 01:35:40.689
that's what makes it so tricky to kind of For

01:35:40.689 --> 01:35:43.029
there to be definitive advice, isn't there? There

01:35:43.029 --> 01:35:47.930
are some general areas of the body that are safer

01:35:47.930 --> 01:35:50.470
and less safe than each other, but it's down

01:35:50.470 --> 01:35:53.250
to the individual's body. So if you're carrying

01:35:53.250 --> 01:35:54.750
a little bit more muscle or carrying a little

01:35:54.750 --> 01:35:56.289
bit more fat, then you're likely to have more

01:35:56.289 --> 01:35:59.829
squishy areas or your squishy areas will be larger.

01:36:01.529 --> 01:36:05.090
It depends on what you're using. Are you using

01:36:05.090 --> 01:36:08.409
a heavy wooden club or a lightweight little bit

01:36:08.409 --> 01:36:12.039
of rubber? but also just what the person is comfortable

01:36:12.039 --> 01:36:14.859
about, like what you just said with being hit

01:36:14.859 --> 01:36:18.960
in the kidneys. That person did not react particularly

01:36:18.960 --> 01:36:21.460
well in that situation, but they might have had

01:36:21.460 --> 01:36:25.039
someone else they were hitting who would have

01:36:25.039 --> 01:36:28.260
said, yeah, it's fine. Yeah. Personal risk profile

01:36:28.260 --> 01:36:30.539
definitely plays a big role because there's very

01:36:30.539 --> 01:36:32.819
few areas where you can say that is absolutely

01:36:32.819 --> 01:36:35.119
100 % safe. There's probably not any really because,

01:36:35.159 --> 01:36:37.840
you know, even a bruise can have serious medical

01:36:37.840 --> 01:36:39.739
complications from it if you're unlucky and you've

01:36:39.739 --> 01:36:43.180
got underlying health conditions. So at a certain

01:36:43.180 --> 01:36:45.239
point, all of it is about what level of risk

01:36:45.239 --> 01:36:47.399
you're comfortable with. So some of the common

01:36:47.399 --> 01:36:49.439
areas that you'll see on these sort of body maps

01:36:49.439 --> 01:36:52.039
about the safe areas, areas marked in red for

01:36:52.039 --> 01:36:54.699
like do not touch, is often face, hands, feet.

01:36:55.319 --> 01:36:57.619
and it'll sometimes include the shins because

01:36:57.619 --> 01:36:59.640
one of the bones like the small bone that runs

01:36:59.640 --> 01:37:02.960
down just behind that is really fragile um so

01:37:02.960 --> 01:37:04.979
the there's a kind of potential risk there obviously

01:37:04.979 --> 01:37:07.260
all the joints are in red i have also met people

01:37:07.260 --> 01:37:09.140
who get hit in every single one of those areas

01:37:09.140 --> 01:37:12.520
and i like feet and face um yeah so that it's

01:37:12.520 --> 01:37:15.289
not that you can't ever Do anything in those

01:37:15.289 --> 01:37:17.710
areas. But it's just to highlight if you are

01:37:17.710 --> 01:37:19.569
playing with getting hit in those areas, there

01:37:19.569 --> 01:37:21.630
may be some specific risks or some higher risks

01:37:21.630 --> 01:37:23.590
that you need to be aware of. Try to mitigate

01:37:23.590 --> 01:37:25.789
for and make a decision for yourself whether

01:37:25.789 --> 01:37:30.609
they're acceptable. Yeah. But I think the really

01:37:30.609 --> 01:37:32.789
important safety topic that we need to discuss

01:37:32.789 --> 01:37:35.810
is the safety of the top. Yes, of course. How

01:37:35.810 --> 01:37:42.579
could I forget the priority? Is it okay to mock

01:37:42.579 --> 01:37:46.659
Hope? Oh, always, mate. She doesn't listen to

01:37:46.659 --> 01:37:50.739
the podcast anyway. I mean, we joke, but it is

01:37:50.739 --> 01:37:56.779
worth thinking about at the top. I have lots

01:37:56.779 --> 01:37:59.380
of experience of accidentally hitting myself

01:37:59.380 --> 01:38:03.960
with the things that I am swinging at you. I

01:38:03.960 --> 01:38:06.739
said earlier on, I kind of, as a guide to make

01:38:06.739 --> 01:38:08.560
sure I don't get too high up your butt, I put

01:38:08.560 --> 01:38:12.390
my hand on your butt. at the point where that

01:38:12.390 --> 01:38:15.270
would be too high sometimes my fingers are splayed

01:38:15.270 --> 01:38:18.649
out and sometimes i catch my thumb when i am

01:38:18.649 --> 01:38:20.270
hitting you with something which is usually quite

01:38:20.270 --> 01:38:22.090
heavy because i'm doing it on your butt yeah

01:38:22.090 --> 01:38:26.109
so that's never a pleasant experience um there

01:38:26.109 --> 01:38:29.130
is a risk of hitting yourself in the swing as

01:38:29.130 --> 01:38:33.079
well which uh hope is intimately familiar with

01:38:33.079 --> 01:38:36.100
she has this very strange habit of hitting herself

01:38:36.100 --> 01:38:40.060
in the penis on a very regular basis suspiciously

01:38:40.060 --> 01:38:43.159
regular yeah i'm waiting for her to just acknowledge

01:38:43.159 --> 01:38:45.260
one day that she's really into cbt and that's

01:38:45.260 --> 01:38:47.279
what it's been about this whole time yeah it

01:38:47.279 --> 01:38:49.380
was honestly when we were together it was almost

01:38:49.380 --> 01:38:51.779
every time we played and now that she's with

01:38:51.779 --> 01:38:54.000
ash every conversation i have with them what

01:38:54.000 --> 01:38:55.880
have you been up to oh i hope was hitting me

01:38:55.880 --> 01:39:00.890
and hit herself in the penis Which I've done

01:39:00.890 --> 01:39:05.170
a couple of times as well. If you're using whippy

01:39:05.170 --> 01:39:08.569
type things or floggers or stuff like that, I've

01:39:08.569 --> 01:39:10.930
hit myself on the back because I've done a big

01:39:10.930 --> 01:39:14.710
reach back to hit you and managed to flog myself

01:39:14.710 --> 01:39:19.609
on the back. So, you know, not quite the same

01:39:19.609 --> 01:39:21.350
level of, I will acknowledge that they are not

01:39:21.350 --> 01:39:23.810
quite the same level of risk. But as a top, you

01:39:23.810 --> 01:39:26.710
need to have some spatial awareness for yourself.

01:39:27.239 --> 01:39:29.359
And for other people as well, especially if you're

01:39:29.359 --> 01:39:32.300
using bigger things, floggery type things. If

01:39:32.300 --> 01:39:33.859
you're playing in a dungeon, you definitely have

01:39:33.859 --> 01:39:36.079
to be aware. You would hope other people will

01:39:36.079 --> 01:39:37.960
be aware as well and not come toddling up behind

01:39:37.960 --> 01:39:39.880
you while you're swinging a whip about. But they

01:39:39.880 --> 01:39:42.319
might. So a little bit of spatial awareness from

01:39:42.319 --> 01:39:46.460
the top is necessary as well. Yes. Yeah. And

01:39:46.460 --> 01:39:48.380
the biggest risk to you, of course, is sadist's

01:39:48.380 --> 01:39:52.159
shoulder. Yes. Yeah, that is true. That is true.

01:39:52.220 --> 01:39:55.079
I am at the age where my joints are starting

01:39:55.079 --> 01:39:59.279
to complain. uh about things repeatedly swinging

01:39:59.279 --> 01:40:02.180
your arm back and forwards is gonna is gonna

01:40:02.180 --> 01:40:04.579
fuck up your shoulder and your elbow so kind

01:40:04.579 --> 01:40:08.159
of take care of it you know um if i had realized

01:40:08.159 --> 01:40:10.479
during the witch trial how much pain your shoulder

01:40:10.479 --> 01:40:12.560
was in i might have held out a little longer

01:40:12.560 --> 01:40:13.920
because i think the amount of time you could

01:40:13.920 --> 01:40:15.539
have kept using those whips was running really

01:40:15.539 --> 01:40:22.500
short yeah yeah it yeah i think i think i probably

01:40:22.500 --> 01:40:24.739
had a good while left in me but i was starting

01:40:24.739 --> 01:40:27.729
to feel it And I was starting to think I am going

01:40:27.729 --> 01:40:31.810
to have to open up the other bottle of distilled

01:40:31.810 --> 01:40:34.409
water. I'm going to have to go and leave you

01:40:34.409 --> 01:40:37.229
there while I go and sort out the nettles, stuff

01:40:37.229 --> 01:40:39.050
like that, just to give myself a bit of a break

01:40:39.050 --> 01:40:46.050
from the hitting you. It's probably one of the

01:40:46.050 --> 01:40:48.430
other practical things to think about is noise.

01:40:50.210 --> 01:40:54.210
Definitely. As well, like less relevant, but

01:40:54.210 --> 01:40:56.399
not... completely irrelevant if you're doing

01:40:56.399 --> 01:41:00.579
it in a in a dungeon at a kink event like people

01:41:00.579 --> 01:41:03.800
expect to hear people expect to hear some noises

01:41:03.800 --> 01:41:06.500
at those events but if you're doing impact at

01:41:06.500 --> 01:41:11.720
home um the noise of both the impact and the

01:41:11.720 --> 01:41:15.220
person being impacted is something to to factor

01:41:15.220 --> 01:41:17.100
definitely yeah especially if you're in like

01:41:17.100 --> 01:41:19.840
a flat with thin walls but even for us in a pretty

01:41:19.840 --> 01:41:22.159
old house with thick walls it's a terrorist house

01:41:22.159 --> 01:41:25.409
and we've yeah agitated one of our neighbors

01:41:25.409 --> 01:41:27.229
a couple of times in the early days before we

01:41:27.229 --> 01:41:29.510
figured out how to manage things yes yeah yeah

01:41:29.510 --> 01:41:34.069
one of the ways that we mitigate i think more

01:41:34.069 --> 01:41:37.890
the noise of hitting you is by putting music

01:41:37.890 --> 01:41:40.310
on when we're doing it yeah so there's music

01:41:40.310 --> 01:41:43.909
where we are fancy with speakers in every room

01:41:43.909 --> 01:41:46.390
in the house so we can put music on throughout

01:41:46.390 --> 01:41:49.199
the whole house which kind of covers up the the

01:41:49.199 --> 01:41:51.640
actual impact bit of it yeah especially because

01:41:51.640 --> 01:41:53.359
you often hit me in time with the music so it

01:41:53.359 --> 01:41:55.979
blends in really well yes yeah i do enjoy doing

01:41:55.979 --> 01:41:57.859
that and i think that helps you with pain processing

01:41:57.859 --> 01:42:00.520
as well in a weird kind of way it does yeah mix

01:42:00.520 --> 01:42:02.680
definitely especially if it's music that i really

01:42:02.680 --> 01:42:04.439
like and i'm sort of like wiggling my feet along

01:42:04.439 --> 01:42:06.420
to or it's something that i can sing along to

01:42:06.420 --> 01:42:08.800
yeah i love singing along to taylor swift while

01:42:08.800 --> 01:42:10.760
i'm getting beat up like my pain threshold goes

01:42:10.760 --> 01:42:15.779
way up but it's harder to mitigate the noise

01:42:15.779 --> 01:42:19.029
that's coming from the person with music Yeah,

01:42:19.090 --> 01:42:20.710
it can muffle it a little bit, but obviously

01:42:20.710 --> 01:42:22.430
we don't want to be putting on music so loud

01:42:22.430 --> 01:42:24.130
that it drowns me out completely, because then

01:42:24.130 --> 01:42:25.569
that would also annoy the neighbours from us

01:42:25.569 --> 01:42:29.289
blasting music. So the idea of music is to sort

01:42:29.289 --> 01:42:32.430
of blend with the noise and make it unidentifiable,

01:42:32.449 --> 01:42:35.430
but not be a noise problem in itself. So there's

01:42:35.430 --> 01:42:37.050
other things that we do to keep the noise levels

01:42:37.050 --> 01:42:40.369
generally low. A lot of the time when we're doing

01:42:40.369 --> 01:42:42.470
impact or doing a lot of things, I'm often face

01:42:42.470 --> 01:42:44.430
down. So I can kind of scream into a pillow,

01:42:44.590 --> 01:42:46.970
shove a pillow into my mouth, burrow my face

01:42:46.970 --> 01:42:48.449
down between the pillows. That muffles quite

01:42:48.449 --> 01:42:53.130
a lot. We have used gags sometimes. Some of the

01:42:53.130 --> 01:42:55.310
gags we use just for fun. You know, things like

01:42:55.310 --> 01:42:57.329
spider gags and mouth hooks. They're not going

01:42:57.329 --> 01:42:59.770
to keep you quiet at all, even a ball gag. It

01:42:59.770 --> 01:43:01.770
will stop you from speaking clearly, but it won't

01:43:01.770 --> 01:43:04.390
stop you making a big loud noise. But shoving...

01:43:05.069 --> 01:43:06.810
pair of socks into my mouth or a pair of underwear

01:43:06.810 --> 01:43:08.909
as well as being a really good time for me especially

01:43:08.909 --> 01:43:12.210
if they're really sweaty um it does it works

01:43:12.210 --> 01:43:14.270
a lot better it's similar to the pillow i can

01:43:14.270 --> 01:43:16.430
sort of bite down on it to actively try to muffle

01:43:16.430 --> 01:43:18.869
myself and it naturally muffles quite a lot yeah

01:43:18.869 --> 01:43:20.649
you combine those two together especially if

01:43:20.649 --> 01:43:22.090
i've got a hood on or something as well and then

01:43:22.090 --> 01:43:23.569
you've got layers and layers and layers kind

01:43:23.569 --> 01:43:25.909
of keeping the screams in yeah um but there's

01:43:25.909 --> 01:43:29.170
a lot that i do with trying to process the pain

01:43:29.170 --> 01:43:31.810
in a way that makes me able to control my reaction

01:43:31.810 --> 01:43:34.680
to it more we've never wanted to fully train

01:43:34.680 --> 01:43:36.560
me out of making noise because you like to hear

01:43:36.560 --> 01:43:38.460
it and I like to be able to have a big feral

01:43:38.460 --> 01:43:40.699
scream when we go to an event, but being able

01:43:40.699 --> 01:43:44.039
to control quite how screamy I am so that I can

01:43:44.039 --> 01:43:46.810
keep volume a bit lower and... keep the screams

01:43:46.810 --> 01:43:49.689
less frequent when I'm at home is helpful. So

01:43:49.689 --> 01:43:53.090
I do a lot of like focusing on my breathing and

01:43:53.090 --> 01:43:54.750
trying to actively slow my breathing down so

01:43:54.750 --> 01:43:56.310
that I'm not in a panic state because a lot of

01:43:56.310 --> 01:43:58.890
the screaming is more fear than it is pain. A

01:43:58.890 --> 01:44:00.590
lot of what we think of as pain responses are

01:44:00.590 --> 01:44:03.470
actually fear responses. Our bodies are so deeply

01:44:03.470 --> 01:44:05.890
programmed to respond to any kind of injury with

01:44:05.890 --> 01:44:07.609
fear because we see it as a threat to safety.

01:44:07.810 --> 01:44:11.489
So a lot of our response to pain is our response

01:44:11.489 --> 01:44:14.489
to the threat of being permanently damaged. So

01:44:14.489 --> 01:44:17.069
if you can calm yourself you can usually manage

01:44:17.069 --> 01:44:19.689
that a lot better so breathing exercise is good

01:44:19.689 --> 01:44:21.689
for that music is really helpful for that not

01:44:21.689 --> 01:44:23.409
just for drowning things out but like i say singing

01:44:23.409 --> 01:44:26.149
along tapping my feet things like that yeah um

01:44:26.149 --> 01:44:30.649
i find that being able to wiggle around a little

01:44:30.649 --> 01:44:32.770
bit can be really helpful for me so sort of having

01:44:32.770 --> 01:44:35.229
a bit of a physical struggle against it i don't

01:44:35.229 --> 01:44:38.310
need to verbally struggle as much um But also

01:44:38.310 --> 01:44:41.170
some of the techniques that I used from the interrogations.

01:44:41.550 --> 01:44:43.750
So looping a song in my head, like I did in the

01:44:43.750 --> 01:44:46.090
first interrogation. And I have tried out my

01:44:46.090 --> 01:44:48.069
insane monologue during a normal impact scene.

01:44:48.189 --> 01:44:50.310
It was before the interrogation, so I didn't

01:44:50.310 --> 01:44:52.029
do it out loud, but I was whispering it into

01:44:52.029 --> 01:44:54.569
the pillow. And that was fun because you started

01:44:54.569 --> 01:44:56.090
hitting me with the dragon tail that usually

01:44:56.090 --> 01:44:58.670
makes me shriek. And I just gave you no reaction.

01:44:59.189 --> 01:45:01.550
And you were there like, what the fuck? It was

01:45:01.550 --> 01:45:03.350
a great pre -interrogation head fuck as well,

01:45:03.369 --> 01:45:05.210
because that really threw you off. You're like...

01:45:05.550 --> 01:45:07.550
How good is this new system that they've got?

01:45:07.609 --> 01:45:14.909
Yeah. Witchcraft. Witchcraft. So, yeah, having

01:45:14.909 --> 01:45:16.989
something to focus on, something that I'm saying

01:45:16.989 --> 01:45:21.409
or singing or listening to or doing, I sometimes

01:45:21.409 --> 01:45:24.250
will focus on a single spot and stare at it as

01:45:24.250 --> 01:45:26.470
well. So that's one, not so much if I'm face

01:45:26.470 --> 01:45:28.989
down on our bed, but if we're in a dungeon, I

01:45:28.989 --> 01:45:31.270
will focus at like a chip of paint on the wall

01:45:31.270 --> 01:45:34.109
or someone's shoe that I can see in my peripheral

01:45:34.109 --> 01:45:35.989
vision or something. And I will just stare at

01:45:35.989 --> 01:45:38.210
that and focus on it. And then you're not focused

01:45:38.210 --> 01:45:40.770
on the pain as much. That allows me to take a

01:45:40.770 --> 01:45:42.590
little bit more, which is always fun. It's nice

01:45:42.590 --> 01:45:44.609
to kind of challenge myself, but it also means

01:45:44.609 --> 01:45:47.289
that I can process what I'm feeling a bit better

01:45:47.289 --> 01:45:49.569
and not go into the panicked feral shrieking

01:45:49.569 --> 01:45:52.670
that upsets friends and neighbours all around

01:45:52.670 --> 01:45:56.409
the place. Yes. So those are my tips. Very good

01:45:56.409 --> 01:45:58.869
tips. Very good tips indeed. One other thing

01:45:58.869 --> 01:46:02.050
to think about is the potential for broken skin.

01:46:02.390 --> 01:46:04.489
So we do quite a lot of bloody impact where the

01:46:04.489 --> 01:46:08.130
point is to break your skin because it's fun

01:46:08.130 --> 01:46:12.229
to do that. But that can sometimes happen unintentionally,

01:46:12.229 --> 01:46:14.189
especially I find more with like resin toys,

01:46:14.310 --> 01:46:16.250
which aren't necessarily finished off on the

01:46:16.250 --> 01:46:18.430
edges. They can sometimes kind of accidentally

01:46:18.430 --> 01:46:22.340
cause a little bit of. yeah or stuff with a textured

01:46:22.340 --> 01:46:24.199
surface even if you don't touch it and feel like

01:46:24.199 --> 01:46:27.199
it's sharp if it's slightly rough over time that

01:46:27.199 --> 01:46:28.720
can start to wear the skin down especially if

01:46:28.720 --> 01:46:30.060
you're sort of hitting and dragging a little

01:46:30.060 --> 01:46:33.899
bit yeah um and because i've got some scarring

01:46:33.899 --> 01:46:36.180
on my butt from like cigarette burns that i've

01:46:36.180 --> 01:46:38.720
done as part of play and from blood play and

01:46:38.720 --> 01:46:41.970
just from life stuff scarring creates weak spots

01:46:41.970 --> 01:46:43.909
so sometimes just getting hit with a completely

01:46:43.909 --> 01:46:46.029
smooth completely normal toy not particularly

01:46:46.029 --> 01:46:48.350
hard will cause one of those weak spots to split

01:46:48.350 --> 01:46:50.970
and what you do kind of depends on your comfort

01:46:50.970 --> 01:46:53.029
level with it for some people broken skin is

01:46:53.439 --> 01:46:55.319
scene ending like they don't want that to happen

01:46:55.319 --> 01:46:57.659
if that happens something's gone wrong um so

01:46:57.659 --> 01:46:59.779
that would be the end of the scene but it's thinking

01:46:59.779 --> 01:47:01.720
about making sure you've always got some first

01:47:01.720 --> 01:47:03.359
aid stuff on hand even if you're not planning

01:47:03.359 --> 01:47:06.560
to break skin because it might happen um if you

01:47:06.560 --> 01:47:08.239
are playing at home it might be a bit less of

01:47:08.239 --> 01:47:10.399
a concern but if you're in a dungeon sometimes

01:47:10.399 --> 01:47:12.180
they'll have rules completely against any blood

01:47:12.180 --> 01:47:14.260
play and will require you to fully stop the scene

01:47:14.260 --> 01:47:16.619
if that happens some of them they might be okay

01:47:16.619 --> 01:47:18.279
with you continuing but they'll have different

01:47:18.279 --> 01:47:20.930
rules about how you play if you're making someone

01:47:20.930 --> 01:47:23.069
bleed so if you decide you want to continue your

01:47:23.069 --> 01:47:24.850
scene you might need to pause to put some plastic

01:47:24.850 --> 01:47:27.949
sheeting down and things like that um if you're

01:47:27.949 --> 01:47:30.710
using borrowed equipment and that happens obviously

01:47:30.710 --> 01:47:32.569
you need to tell the owner of the equipment it

01:47:32.569 --> 01:47:34.729
is clean up best you can and make them aware

01:47:34.729 --> 01:47:36.449
of it so they can do anything that they want

01:47:36.449 --> 01:47:39.149
to do about that um so that you're not passing

01:47:39.149 --> 01:47:41.670
a toy on to someone else to use that's got someone

01:47:41.670 --> 01:47:43.229
else's blood on it because that can be a safety

01:47:43.229 --> 01:47:45.390
risk yeah and just an ick for a lot of people

01:47:45.390 --> 01:47:50.329
um and thinking about then Once you have bled

01:47:50.329 --> 01:47:53.390
on a toy, what your risk and what any partner's

01:47:53.390 --> 01:47:56.609
risks are about who else uses that toy. So if

01:47:56.609 --> 01:47:57.949
you're someone who plays with a lot of different

01:47:57.949 --> 01:48:00.970
people and one of your personal toys has broken

01:48:00.970 --> 01:48:04.310
someone's skin, you really need to either not

01:48:04.310 --> 01:48:06.229
use that with anyone else in future or at an

01:48:06.229 --> 01:48:08.189
absolute bare minimum be disclosing that to other

01:48:08.189 --> 01:48:10.310
people and finding out what their comfort with

01:48:10.310 --> 01:48:12.829
that is. Because even if it is a tiny spot of

01:48:12.829 --> 01:48:14.229
blood and you've wiped it all clean and you've

01:48:14.229 --> 01:48:16.390
used alcohol wipes and everything that you can

01:48:16.390 --> 01:48:19.720
do, it's not a zero risk anymore. So that's something

01:48:19.720 --> 01:48:22.640
that needs to be navigated responsibly. Yeah,

01:48:22.699 --> 01:48:26.939
that is very true. That is all very good. And

01:48:26.939 --> 01:48:29.880
kind of connected to that last bit is kind of

01:48:29.880 --> 01:48:33.079
just generally taking care of the things that

01:48:33.079 --> 01:48:34.979
you're using, taking care of your tools and toys

01:48:34.979 --> 01:48:38.420
and things like that. So, you know, particularly

01:48:38.420 --> 01:48:41.840
with things that are wooden or made of resin

01:48:41.840 --> 01:48:44.000
or a little bit more kind of delicate, kind of

01:48:44.000 --> 01:48:47.760
checking them for... chips and scratches and

01:48:47.760 --> 01:48:49.659
splits and things like that you know kind of

01:48:49.659 --> 01:48:51.920
we've we said earlier on we've broken a couple

01:48:51.920 --> 01:48:56.739
of canes at least one of them kind of broke at

01:48:56.739 --> 01:49:00.939
the top but actually at the end of it but actually

01:49:00.939 --> 01:49:05.720
that made it less strong as a whole piece so

01:49:05.720 --> 01:49:07.739
it kind of didn't didn't continue to use it because

01:49:07.739 --> 01:49:09.859
it was just going to get worse and nothing worse

01:49:09.859 --> 01:49:12.720
than getting a really big splinter in you but

01:49:12.720 --> 01:49:15.180
mid impact scene so kind of making sure that

01:49:15.180 --> 01:49:16.899
they're not visibly damaged making sure that

01:49:16.899 --> 01:49:20.619
they're kind of still uh in one piece yeah because

01:49:20.619 --> 01:49:23.260
even like a tiny little chip or a scratch in

01:49:23.260 --> 01:49:25.539
a toy that seems pretty harmless when you're

01:49:25.539 --> 01:49:27.779
hitting someone with a great amount of force

01:49:27.779 --> 01:49:29.560
yeah that's going to make it a lot more likely

01:49:29.560 --> 01:49:31.319
to break their skin and more likely that the

01:49:31.319 --> 01:49:33.659
toy is going to break more seriously so something

01:49:33.659 --> 01:49:35.399
that looks like it's like oh that could give

01:49:35.399 --> 01:49:37.220
someone a splinter you hit them with it really

01:49:37.220 --> 01:49:39.380
hard and the toy splits in half now you've like

01:49:39.380 --> 01:49:42.300
stab them with it basically yeah um so yeah once

01:49:42.300 --> 01:49:44.079
toys start to break down they should generally

01:49:44.079 --> 01:49:48.260
be replaced be replaced yeah and trying to keep

01:49:48.260 --> 01:49:49.859
them clean as best you can especially if you

01:49:49.859 --> 01:49:52.819
are gonna kind of share if you're going to use

01:49:52.819 --> 01:49:54.699
the same thing on on multiple people kind of

01:49:54.699 --> 01:49:57.560
wiping them down using alcohol wipes to to wipe

01:49:57.560 --> 01:49:59.840
them down thinking about how and where you're

01:49:59.840 --> 01:50:03.699
storing them um it's probably something we do

01:50:03.699 --> 01:50:06.729
less Because most of the time I'm hitting you.

01:50:07.069 --> 01:50:09.550
Yeah, there's less of a risk of that. Less opportunity

01:50:09.550 --> 01:50:13.430
for you to be using toys on other people. You've

01:50:13.430 --> 01:50:15.710
definitely obviously taken extra measures with

01:50:15.710 --> 01:50:17.189
it when you're doing blood play with other people,

01:50:17.229 --> 01:50:20.689
but with regular impact, generally making sure

01:50:20.689 --> 01:50:23.390
things are clean and in good condition and letting

01:50:23.390 --> 01:50:25.329
people know that they have been used before and

01:50:25.329 --> 01:50:27.550
letting them make their own choices. So considering

01:50:27.550 --> 01:50:30.560
that impact play is something that... that most

01:50:30.560 --> 01:50:32.739
kinky people have at least tried and a lot of

01:50:32.739 --> 01:50:34.319
vanilla people have had a little bit of a dabble

01:50:34.319 --> 01:50:36.159
with yeah there's actually quite a lot to it

01:50:36.159 --> 01:50:37.800
i thought this might be quite a quick one but

01:50:37.800 --> 01:50:40.340
we've had a lot to say yeah i think because it

01:50:40.340 --> 01:50:42.279
is such a varied kink that could be done in so

01:50:42.279 --> 01:50:44.380
many different ways like it can be really sensual

01:50:44.380 --> 01:50:47.579
it can be really sadistic it can be really playful

01:50:47.579 --> 01:50:50.319
and giggly and silly it can be really serious

01:50:50.319 --> 01:50:52.420
and dark with lots of crying and yelling and

01:50:52.420 --> 01:50:55.600
saying that i hate you yeah um and i think that's

01:50:55.600 --> 01:50:58.880
probably why it comes up in almost every scene

01:50:58.880 --> 01:51:00.340
that we do there'll be at least a little bit

01:51:00.340 --> 01:51:03.420
of hitting going on yeah because you can use

01:51:03.420 --> 01:51:05.500
it in so many different ways to add a little

01:51:05.500 --> 01:51:08.000
bit of extra spice yeah to anything that you're

01:51:08.000 --> 01:51:11.000
doing yeah i would agree so give it a go whack

01:51:11.000 --> 01:51:13.520
the hell out your partners yeah with contentually

01:51:18.480 --> 01:51:20.680
don't just turn the podcast off and go and slap

01:51:20.680 --> 01:51:23.220
them across the face oh god please don't uh there

01:51:23.220 --> 01:51:25.119
was that time on a night out where a woman came

01:51:25.119 --> 01:51:26.819
up to me and said that her content had inspired

01:51:26.819 --> 01:51:28.680
me to punch her boyfriend in the face during

01:51:28.680 --> 01:51:32.000
sex and that was that was where it started no

01:51:32.000 --> 01:51:34.079
conversation or anything um so yeah please don't

01:51:34.079 --> 01:51:36.500
do that no we i ended up having to give a very

01:51:36.500 --> 01:51:41.510
drunk lecture on consent and safety I'm sure

01:51:41.510 --> 01:51:43.949
it was a very good lecture. Probably, probably.

01:51:44.149 --> 01:51:46.649
I feel like I have a lot more to say when I'm

01:51:46.649 --> 01:51:48.770
drunk than when I'm sober, honestly, so I probably

01:51:48.770 --> 01:51:51.529
went on a bit. I'm sure she learned some things.

01:51:51.670 --> 01:51:54.130
If she's still stuck around and listening to

01:51:54.130 --> 01:51:56.170
the podcast, hi, I'm sorry I always use you as

01:51:56.170 --> 01:51:58.789
the cautionary tale, but please don't do that.

01:52:00.069 --> 01:52:03.229
Hope you're doing well. Yes, and hopefully not

01:52:03.229 --> 01:52:04.770
punching anyone in the face unless they've asked

01:52:04.770 --> 01:52:07.590
for it. Yep. And on that note, I think we're

01:52:07.590 --> 01:52:29.189
done. Yep. Bye! See you next time!