WEBVTT

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Welcome to Don't Scare the Newbies, a podcast

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where we talk kink, raw and unfiltered. I'm Carizal,

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a lifestyle submissive in a 24 -7 dynamic who

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likes their kink heavy, intense and scary. And

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I'm S, Carizal's dominant who knows how to deliver

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all of the above. And today we're going to be

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talking all about appearance control, especially

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with elements of it that we tie into bimbofication,

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which is something that we started exploring

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at the beginning of this year. Yes. Yes. Yes.

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I was looking at you expecting a funny little

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one -liner like we usually get, but the tank

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is empty today. No, no, I have one. Oh, you have

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one? I have one. Come on, Barbie, let's go party.

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Sorry. It's okay. So appearance control is a

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really broad area of kink. I doubt we're going

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to be able to touch on even a tenth of the potential

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of it today. No, there is quite a lot to it.

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This is definitely one of those episodes where

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this is our take on it, our version of it. This

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is not the extent of it by any stretch. Definitely.

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I think as with anything we talk about, all we

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can really talk about is stuff from our experience

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or like at most we can draw on little bits and

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pieces we know from the people around us. Kink

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is such a... broad area in general and there's

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so much space for exploration and doing things

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your own way it's one of my favorite things about

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it is you get to basically create a completely

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bespoke relationship intimate life sex life All

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of these things that are so kind of laid out

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for you by society a lot of the time, you know,

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you get into a heterosexual marriage and you

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have two children and a dog and all of this stuff.

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And it's like, you can have all those things

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if you want, but here's a huge menu of other

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shit that you can add to it if you'd like. Yeah,

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cats, for example. Cats, for example, yes. But

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I think appearance control especially, it's very

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variable depending on what people are actually

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aiming for with it. So we're going to talk quite

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a lot about bimbofication because that's the

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direction that we've gone in with it. But that's

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not where appearance control has started for

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us. We have experimented with other elements

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of it in the past as well. Yeah, I think where

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we're at now with it, especially when we get

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on to talk about bimbofication, like you say,

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is very different to where we started and also

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quite different to... like my previous experience

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of it as well and you know the i guess the clue

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is in the name isn't it in in our um ds talk

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power exchange type of dynamic um i have quite

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a lot of control and and in theory have had quite

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a lot of control over your appearance aspects

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of your appearance um for a while yeah it definitely

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wasn't in the sort of first batch of rules that

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we introduced but We started exploring specifically

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the bimbofication elements of it at the beginning

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of this year, so January 2025. But I would say

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it was probably about halfway through 2024, at

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a rough guess, that we introduced some rules

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around appearance. And those early rules, it

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was that I would ask your input first about what

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you wanted me to wear. So when I got up in the

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morning, I would say, do you have any instructions

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for what you want me to wear today, mix? And

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back then, 99 % of the time, the answer was no,

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wear what you want. But even just that, I find

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is a really enjoyable element of control to have.

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Even if you don't use it very much, it's knowing

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that you can still add something to me. Yeah,

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there's that kind of process of checking in,

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isn't there, I suppose, with that, which gives

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me a degree of control. It's always a bit surprising

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to think back to that version of the rules. that

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I didn't take advantage of that control as much

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as I could. Yeah, I think I was sort of, there

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was a part of me that was surprised that you

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didn't take advantage of it more, but also there

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wasn't a lot of particularly varied choices in

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my clothes. Yeah, I think my style last year

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was kind of like a hippie librarian. Lots of

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big baggy jumpers. often crocheted by me um lots

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of sort of baggy kind of hippie pants and long

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skirts occasionally yeah um yeah because that's

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something people quite often comment on the process

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that we've gone over this year and and see it

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as like almost like forced feminization adjacent

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like you're changing my gender presentation but

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the thing is i was 90 percent of what was in

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my wardrobe was women's clothes they were just

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like more comfy practical types of women's clothes

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that don't sort of ping off the gender radar

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quite as much as wearing a yeah yeah and it's

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it's that it was because i really liked how you

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look i am going to keep returning to this yeah

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throughout this i thought you might with the

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many disclaimers yeah yeah yeah um i really liked

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that look that you had as well yeah it was it

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was a it was a variation on like androgyny is

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not quite the right word because of the way that

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people think when they hear the word androgyny

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yeah But you, yeah, it was that kind of combination

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of a lot of the clothes that you were wearing

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were actually designed for women. Yeah. But weren't

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giving a really feminine presentation to it.

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Yeah. I think a lot of the time when I shop for

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clothes for myself, just going off my own tastes,

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I tend to look for the stuff in the men's section

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that looks like it could have been in the women's

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section and the stuff in the women's section

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that looks like it could have been in the men's

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section. And I very much drift naturally towards

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what I would call like chaotic androgyny. So

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the stereotypical androgyny is like sort of grey,

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beige, neutral colours, kind of quite featureless

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plain clothes, lots of pants and blazers and

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baggy tops that hide your shape. And it's always,

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you know, the general perception of androgyny

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is very much that it's a skinny white assigned

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female at birth person's thing. yeah and i'm

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white and assigned female at birth but i am i'm

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not skinny um and androgyny can break out of

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all of those categories and be its own thing

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and i always preferred the version of androgyny

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where it was instead of stripping away all the

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features that can be gendered is include all

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of the features that can be gendered in either

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direction and let people figure out what to do

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with the mess yeah yeah um yeah so yeah it's

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it's it's almost the anti nothing against h &m

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they do some very nice clothes But it's almost

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the anti -HNM kind of unisex, androgynous vibe.

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Yeah. Isn't it? Which just, I actually remember,

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just to go completely off topic, I remember when

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we were at Kendall Calling, we saw a little store,

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didn't we, that was selling, but marketed as

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androgynous clothes or unisex clothes. Yeah.

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And it was just baggy t -shirts. Pastel -coloured

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baggy t -shirts, yeah. That's not, that's not.

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androgyny that's just they're just t -shirts

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yeah so yeah like I think because my look was

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It was a lot of stuff that was all kind of a

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similar vibe. It maybe didn't give you a lot

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to work with in terms of taking that control.

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You couldn't sort of go, this is the image I

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want to create today because whatever you pull

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down my wardrobe, you're going to get more or

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less the same. But I think part of it is it's

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a lot easier to do appearance control when you

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have a goal in mind of what you're trying to

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create rather than just outfit picking. It's

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trying to do something and it's obviously something

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that we have now with you very much. creating

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the bimbo look you have a lot of oversight over

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the clothes that i buy and you have daily oversight

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over what i wear and a lot of other things as

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well that we'll talk about as we go on but but

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that then gives you sort of a dressing up box

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to play with with me to create the image that

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you're going for and that was something that

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with my previous experience of appearance control

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as well in my last relationship was also a feature

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we weren't doing bimbofication or anything else

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that had a very sort of defined look to it but

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my ex -partner had an aesthetic that she particularly

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liked and thought suited me yeah and we we did

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some again that sort of clothes shopping with

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oversight to stock my wardrobe with the kind

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of things that that fit that look yeah and then

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i would dress in that way um so she wanted very

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much a kind of like she's going to crucify me

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for this because i don't know all the gen z language

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for it but basically like a sort of old boy like

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a little bit emo like emo guy style baggy hoodies

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and kind of baggy pants and stuff when she was

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dressing me I got stopped by the police more

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times than I ever have in my life before including

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when I was an actual drug addict because every

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time they saw me smoking a cigarette in public

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they assumed it was weed so she'd nailed the

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look I looked like a little teenager reprobate

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and I don't know what the words are either because

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I'm infinitely older than you but i could yeah

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i recognize the look and kind of looking at photos

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of you from that time yeah i'm like yeah actually

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she did quite a good job of nailing that particular

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aesthetic yeah um nightmare though because i

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was still getting regularly id'd buying like

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alcohol or cigarettes back then i mean the clothes

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she put me in i had no chance if i'd forgotten

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my id like no one believed for a second that

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i was an adult yeah yeah it was crazy I was skinnier

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then and have quite a baby face. So dressing

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me like that immediately takes another five years

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off me that I really don't have going spare.

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Teenage boy sometimes. Yeah. That's fair. I think

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in my previous dynamic as well, it was a variation

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on that. It wasn't necessarily kind of trying

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to create a look, but actually I would pick outfits

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every day. Yeah. I think the difference. and

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I still find this a bit of a struggle today is

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being able to narrow down options like on the

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fly sort of thing what happened in my previous

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relationship partly to make my life easier partly

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because we were a lot of distance is that um

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we had a bunch of photos of different outfits

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and different tops and different bottles and

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stuff like that and I would pick from those yeah

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so I had this like reference library or um sometimes

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um because obviously she was uh working as well

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so i had to dress a particular way for work it

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would be like would you want this outfit or this

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outfit yeah kind of thing um i would make the

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decision between the options that were presented

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to me so it wasn't like complete control over

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how she looked but it was still the final decision

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and yeah making the final decision on it which

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worked really well as well and i think that's

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the cool thing about appearance control within

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these kind of dynamics is there's all sorts of

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stuff that you can do with it you know at one

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end you can go full on the way that we have with

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big modification right to actually just wear

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that top yeah or even just a fit check yeah yes

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because that's what we we did when on days when

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you didn't give me any instructions on what to

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wear I still had to then come and present to

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you what I was wearing yeah for final approval

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yeah and again more often than not you were just

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like yeah that's fine But it's still, it was

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that other little layer of power to it where

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you could leave it up to me and then I could

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have come out in an outfit and you'd gone, actually,

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now I want you in a red top, not a blue top,

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go change it. Yeah. So it gave you another little

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option to pull on the reins if you wanted to.

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Yeah. Yeah. And there's, you know, all different

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ways that I've seen people doing it. If it's

00:11:24.159 --> 00:11:26.059
just about doing it in scenes and stuff like

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that, particular. Shush, cookie. No, you're not.

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You're not in this episode. I will edit you out.

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You can stay if you'll be quiet. You have to

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be quiet. There's all sorts of variations that

00:11:46.330 --> 00:11:49.149
you can do with it. So we were looking at like

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day -to -day, like daily outfits. Yeah. And that's

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what I was doing in my previous dynamics, what

00:11:54.250 --> 00:11:55.889
you did in your previous relationship and what

00:11:55.889 --> 00:11:59.169
we did at the start. But there's like scene -specific

00:11:59.169 --> 00:12:01.730
things as well. It always sounds a bit kind of...

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cliche I suppose but like picking out the underwear

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that someone wears yep you know can be a subtle

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way of doing it like if you do a job where you've

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got to wear a certain outfit or a certain uniform

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you know if you worked retail or hospitality

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or something like that we couldn't do appearance

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control in the way that we did no but I could

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say wear that bra or wear that those that underwear

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yeah and there would still be that level of control

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But I suppose it's one of those areas which is

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just there's loads of possibilities for it. It's

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dead exciting. Yeah. Yeah, you've got a lot of

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flexibility with it. Like you say, things that

00:12:36.019 --> 00:12:38.200
can be very subtle like that, like what you had

00:12:38.200 --> 00:12:40.360
with your last relationship where you were choosing

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between two outfits sometimes. Yeah. That person

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still had full control, really, of their image.

00:12:46.559 --> 00:12:48.259
Yeah, yeah. But you were getting that specific

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final say. With something like underwear, it's

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not perceivable by anyone else at all. Yeah.

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Generally. what underwear you're wearing for

00:12:55.259 --> 00:12:58.320
bikini wax or something yeah um so that's something

00:12:58.320 --> 00:12:59.980
that's just between the two of you and it's like

00:12:59.980 --> 00:13:02.559
a little a little secret yes which can be really

00:13:02.559 --> 00:13:05.539
hot not maybe though it is fun when you have

00:13:05.539 --> 00:13:07.559
it as full on as we do because you get the reaction

00:13:07.559 --> 00:13:10.389
of everybody else to it and i'm not saying It's

00:13:10.389 --> 00:13:12.149
not like an exhibitionistic thing and it's not

00:13:12.149 --> 00:13:14.950
involving people in the kink, but you get to

00:13:14.950 --> 00:13:18.009
get the feedback from others that tells you that

00:13:18.009 --> 00:13:19.769
the dynamic is changing you in a way, which I

00:13:19.769 --> 00:13:22.470
really like. I like the fact that the relationship

00:13:22.470 --> 00:13:26.330
that we have is having a significant impact on

00:13:26.330 --> 00:13:28.889
how I'm perceived by the rest of the world. yeah

00:13:28.889 --> 00:13:30.730
um and it's really cool like a lot of the time

00:13:30.730 --> 00:13:32.850
the response i get to is people thinking i've

00:13:32.850 --> 00:13:34.789
had like a massive glow up sometimes people questioning

00:13:34.789 --> 00:13:36.210
if there's something a bit fucky going on with

00:13:36.210 --> 00:13:39.309
my gender because it's a bit there um but generally

00:13:39.309 --> 00:13:41.029
it's been like a really positive response to

00:13:41.029 --> 00:13:42.870
it and it's like yeah my relationship made me

00:13:42.870 --> 00:13:48.370
hotter that's pretty cool disclaimer number two

00:13:48.370 --> 00:13:53.549
no it didn't the third party feedback appears

00:13:53.549 --> 00:14:00.070
to be Yeah, OK, I will accept that. I will accept

00:14:00.070 --> 00:14:03.889
that. Although somewhat frustratingly, people

00:14:03.889 --> 00:14:07.190
seem to be struggling to gender you correctly.

00:14:08.029 --> 00:14:09.990
People have always struggled to gender me correctly,

00:14:10.169 --> 00:14:13.850
thanks. Right, that's fair, yeah. OK. Sometimes

00:14:13.850 --> 00:14:16.090
the direction that they're typically getting

00:14:16.090 --> 00:14:18.990
it wrong in moves from one to the other, but...

00:14:18.990 --> 00:14:24.929
Yeah, yeah. It's generally wrong. Yeah. fair

00:14:24.929 --> 00:14:26.350
but we shouldn't actually we shouldn't laugh

00:14:26.350 --> 00:14:30.110
about that that is not okay but i can kind of

00:14:30.110 --> 00:14:32.850
understand it i suppose yeah from a perspective

00:14:32.850 --> 00:14:34.529
of people who don't know you and just see you

00:14:34.529 --> 00:14:37.929
on the internet yeah they go if it looks like

00:14:37.929 --> 00:14:46.250
a duck it's probably a woman we will be circling

00:14:46.250 --> 00:14:47.950
back to some stuff about gender at some point

00:14:47.950 --> 00:14:50.690
but first i thought seeing as we've talked a

00:14:50.690 --> 00:14:52.929
little bit about bimbofication but in our typical

00:14:52.929 --> 00:14:54.490
way of getting ahead of ourselves. We haven't

00:14:54.490 --> 00:14:56.950
explained at all what that is. I thought I would

00:14:56.950 --> 00:15:00.110
ask you to give us a little rundown of what bimbofication

00:15:00.110 --> 00:15:03.830
is and why it appealed to you. Okay, this is

00:15:03.830 --> 00:15:07.809
my own take on bimbofication. But actually, for

00:15:07.809 --> 00:15:10.269
me, bimbofication is a pretty straightforward

00:15:10.269 --> 00:15:13.970
idea. It is the process of turning someone into

00:15:13.970 --> 00:15:16.929
a bimbo. And there are all kinds of ways that

00:15:16.929 --> 00:15:21.190
you can define that. But for us, it is the process

00:15:21.190 --> 00:15:26.470
of turning you into a very overly feminine sexual

00:15:26.470 --> 00:15:29.870
object. Yes. From an appearance perspective.

00:15:30.210 --> 00:15:33.070
Yes. Respecting your gender identity at all times.

00:15:33.230 --> 00:15:37.009
But that's what it is for us. It's that kind

00:15:37.009 --> 00:15:40.669
of, I wouldn't go so far as to say hyper -feminized,

00:15:40.669 --> 00:15:43.629
but they're kind of, you know, slightly over

00:15:43.629 --> 00:15:47.350
the top. kind of feminine presentation yeah and

00:15:47.350 --> 00:15:50.429
the idea of turning you into a sexual object

00:15:50.429 --> 00:15:55.450
that i own and control yes i think is how i would

00:15:55.450 --> 00:15:57.870
how i would define it yes you look terrified

00:15:57.870 --> 00:15:59.389
you think the bimbos are going to come for you

00:15:59.389 --> 00:16:02.070
if you get this wrong yeah yeah i am because

00:16:02.070 --> 00:16:03.990
there's all sorts of versions of it that's the

00:16:03.990 --> 00:16:06.210
that's the really fascinating thing about it

00:16:06.210 --> 00:16:10.149
you look at people who you know look at people

00:16:10.149 --> 00:16:12.450
on felt like who identify as a bimbo people on

00:16:13.220 --> 00:16:15.700
instagram tiktok or whatever who identify as

00:16:15.700 --> 00:16:21.580
a as a bimbo and there's just such variety in

00:16:21.580 --> 00:16:24.600
it and and you know some of it is about appearance

00:16:24.600 --> 00:16:27.399
some of it is about attitude yeah you know there

00:16:27.399 --> 00:16:29.519
was that whole movement a few years ago wasn't

00:16:29.519 --> 00:16:32.559
there where kind of being a bimbo was was um

00:16:32.559 --> 00:16:35.740
kind of reclaimed by people really taking care

00:16:35.740 --> 00:16:37.259
of themselves and having a particular attitude

00:16:37.259 --> 00:16:40.019
to life and really being empowered by that all

00:16:40.019 --> 00:16:42.259
the positive messages around the barbie movie

00:16:42.259 --> 00:16:46.120
i suppose yeah um because it can be very barbie

00:16:46.120 --> 00:16:48.940
adjacent yeah definitely i think there's a there

00:16:48.940 --> 00:16:51.500
were there are sort of different kind of physical

00:16:51.500 --> 00:16:54.039
styles that you could associate with bimbofication

00:16:54.039 --> 00:16:56.600
yeah and we had some discussion you were kind

00:16:56.600 --> 00:16:59.019
of considering like the sort of goth bimbo look

00:16:59.019 --> 00:17:01.279
yeah and i was like love that for other people

00:17:01.279 --> 00:17:05.119
but i cannot pull off all that black wrong coloring

00:17:05.119 --> 00:17:07.859
for it whether i'm pale or tan i don't suit i

00:17:07.859 --> 00:17:10.180
don't suit that i'm not good at the makeup i

00:17:10.180 --> 00:17:12.559
don't want black hair like if you ordered me

00:17:12.559 --> 00:17:14.859
to do it i would do it but i would hootle and

00:17:14.859 --> 00:17:17.619
fuss about it um yeah and i was very keen that

00:17:17.619 --> 00:17:19.059
if we were going to do bimbofication we were

00:17:19.059 --> 00:17:21.480
going to go down the sort of the kind of barbie

00:17:21.480 --> 00:17:24.960
slash porn star slash little bit of drag in there

00:17:24.960 --> 00:17:29.500
yeah lots of pink lots of makeup yeah just everything

00:17:29.500 --> 00:17:32.869
everything to the maximum we kind of settled

00:17:32.869 --> 00:17:35.210
on a almost yeah like that kind of slightly trashy

00:17:35.210 --> 00:17:38.269
kind of bimbo aesthetic didn't we have yeah you

00:17:38.269 --> 00:17:40.089
know like i said lots of the pink lots of tracksuits

00:17:40.089 --> 00:17:44.289
lots of animal print yeah kind of kind of thing

00:17:44.289 --> 00:17:46.250
you'd sit there smiling when you're talking it's

00:17:46.250 --> 00:17:49.210
so much fun i love it i just i just feel like

00:17:49.210 --> 00:17:53.269
i'm barbie every day it's great yeah yeah i think

00:17:53.269 --> 00:17:55.269
the idea of it really appeals to me one is because

00:17:55.269 --> 00:17:58.230
it's another level of control yeah within our

00:17:58.230 --> 00:18:01.730
dynamic layer of autonomy that you are ceding

00:18:01.730 --> 00:18:06.369
to me and and letting me kind of define that

00:18:06.369 --> 00:18:09.210
but also the kind of the kind of the objectification

00:18:09.210 --> 00:18:11.789
part of it for me is really hot you know it's

00:18:11.789 --> 00:18:15.890
baked into our contract and our rules that your

00:18:15.890 --> 00:18:20.509
your role is to make yourself a sexually attractive

00:18:20.509 --> 00:18:23.210
object for me and that's just that that's just

00:18:23.210 --> 00:18:25.710
really hot to me i really like that idea and

00:18:25.710 --> 00:18:27.990
it ties in with free use and stuff like that

00:18:27.990 --> 00:18:30.819
your purpose is as a source of sexual pleasure

00:18:30.819 --> 00:18:33.779
yeah which is definitely the part of it that

00:18:33.779 --> 00:18:35.740
appealed to me i think when you first suggested

00:18:35.740 --> 00:18:38.700
it i was i was up for it because i will try anything

00:18:38.700 --> 00:18:43.079
at least twice to make sure and like i like appearance

00:18:43.079 --> 00:18:45.740
control i i really like appearance control and

00:18:45.740 --> 00:18:47.880
i was very keen on anything that would encourage

00:18:47.880 --> 00:18:50.019
you to lean into that more and use it a little

00:18:50.019 --> 00:18:52.519
bit more so i figured like having a theme to

00:18:52.519 --> 00:18:57.730
work to would be okay um but the bimbofication

00:18:57.730 --> 00:19:00.349
had never been on my list of kinks to try it

00:19:00.349 --> 00:19:01.690
had never been something that grabbed me and

00:19:01.690 --> 00:19:04.250
i think to be honest what it was was a little

00:19:04.250 --> 00:19:07.250
bit of someone needs to invent a word for like

00:19:07.250 --> 00:19:10.930
the kink version of toxic masculinity like this

00:19:10.930 --> 00:19:13.910
attitude that i have to look a certain way to

00:19:13.910 --> 00:19:15.750
be kinky i have to act a certain way to be kinky

00:19:15.750 --> 00:19:17.990
i have to prove how serious and dark my kink

00:19:17.990 --> 00:19:20.210
is all the time yeah so kink should be like black

00:19:20.210 --> 00:19:24.150
leather and chains and like crying in a dungeon

00:19:24.150 --> 00:19:30.259
and just being like really like and i thought

00:19:30.259 --> 00:19:34.920
some of our kink is very bad yeah um but i always

00:19:34.920 --> 00:19:37.900
felt like sort of bimbofication dollification

00:19:37.900 --> 00:19:42.019
a lot of the um like aesthetic that littles go

00:19:42.019 --> 00:19:44.259
for and things like that i mean i i don't have

00:19:44.259 --> 00:19:47.000
an interest in an age play anyway for for various

00:19:47.000 --> 00:19:50.579
reasons but those aesthetics never seemed like

00:19:50.579 --> 00:19:52.440
things i would want because i felt like it would

00:19:52.440 --> 00:19:55.319
take some of my dark and serious edge player

00:19:56.279 --> 00:19:59.680
vibe away from me yeah um and it was like that's

00:19:59.680 --> 00:20:02.619
great for you guys but but but i am a serious

00:20:02.619 --> 00:20:05.519
heavy player i can't be dabbling with that pink

00:20:05.519 --> 00:20:09.019
pretty yeah and it's like actually i can dabble

00:20:09.019 --> 00:20:10.579
with the pink pretty nonsense like i have a really

00:20:10.579 --> 00:20:12.579
fun time with it and actually the kink has got

00:20:12.579 --> 00:20:14.779
darker heavier and edgier since i've been doing

00:20:14.779 --> 00:20:17.779
it so the two can join together but i think when

00:20:17.779 --> 00:20:19.480
you're new to kink you sometimes feel like you've

00:20:19.480 --> 00:20:22.539
kind of got to prove yourself and at least i

00:20:22.539 --> 00:20:24.240
did i sort of absorbed this thing of like if

00:20:24.240 --> 00:20:25.680
people think that i'm a newbie that doesn't know

00:20:25.680 --> 00:20:27.579
what i'm talking about i need to prove i'm really

00:20:27.579 --> 00:20:35.019
serious yeah yeah it's it's a weird kind of yeah

00:20:35.019 --> 00:20:36.940
they did you're right the people need to invent

00:20:36.940 --> 00:20:40.339
a new word for it the kink version of toxic masculinity

00:20:40.339 --> 00:20:43.640
yeah because it's it's it it's that kind of one

00:20:43.640 --> 00:20:48.000
true way sort of yeah vibe which i despise same

00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:50.319
and i never i never applied that standard to

00:20:50.319 --> 00:20:53.420
anybody else yeah but it was that sort of quite

00:20:53.420 --> 00:20:55.880
unhealthy need to prove myself and be quite competitive

00:20:55.880 --> 00:20:59.980
with how i did kink like i felt like everyone

00:20:59.980 --> 00:21:02.180
was sort of analyzing my kinkiness and putting

00:21:02.180 --> 00:21:04.740
me into a box and i needed to be constantly telling

00:21:04.740 --> 00:21:07.220
them which box that should be yeah and actually

00:21:07.220 --> 00:21:09.680
the boxes are not important and people will generally

00:21:09.680 --> 00:21:11.480
move between a lot of them in their time doing

00:21:11.480 --> 00:21:14.180
kink and yeah and there is no one true way no

00:21:14.180 --> 00:21:17.480
there's a few true wrong ways but yeah but there's

00:21:17.480 --> 00:21:20.380
a lot of true right ways yeah i think that i

00:21:20.380 --> 00:21:22.500
think i think that's a really i think that's

00:21:22.500 --> 00:21:24.019
a really good way to put it isn't it but yeah

00:21:24.019 --> 00:21:26.480
it's interesting that you say it wasn't really

00:21:26.480 --> 00:21:30.220
something that was on your radar because i it's

00:21:30.220 --> 00:21:33.000
before i met you it wasn't either for me yeah

00:21:33.000 --> 00:21:37.259
really i've done a little bit in the previous

00:21:37.259 --> 00:21:42.119
relationship but really quite light sort of um

00:21:42.119 --> 00:21:45.710
aspects of it so you know as we'll get on to

00:21:45.710 --> 00:21:47.490
the i talk about the mental side of it kind of

00:21:47.490 --> 00:21:50.109
regular edging and stuff like that and and kind

00:21:50.109 --> 00:21:53.450
of playing dress up sometimes yeah but not really

00:21:53.450 --> 00:21:56.410
kind of leaning into that quite extensive process

00:21:56.410 --> 00:21:59.289
of transformation which bimbofication is about

00:21:59.289 --> 00:22:01.329
which i think is a really interesting thing with

00:22:01.329 --> 00:22:03.250
it it's not necessarily the outcome it is the

00:22:03.250 --> 00:22:06.670
process yeah that is really interesting and exciting

00:22:06.670 --> 00:22:09.549
for me yeah i think if you ever sort of get to

00:22:09.549 --> 00:22:12.539
like the final version We'll probably then look

00:22:12.539 --> 00:22:14.440
for something different. Yeah, Bimbo and Nirvana.

00:22:15.740 --> 00:22:18.799
But actually, as we're talking, I'm trying to

00:22:18.799 --> 00:22:21.680
remember. I can remember us having the conversation

00:22:21.680 --> 00:22:23.259
with her. I can even remember where we were.

00:22:23.539 --> 00:22:25.559
As long as the walk at Tynemouth along the beach.

00:22:25.720 --> 00:22:27.460
Yeah, yeah. Because we were talking about it

00:22:27.460 --> 00:22:29.759
in the car on the way to Tynemouth. When you

00:22:29.759 --> 00:22:33.200
say Tynemouth, I say Tynemouth. I think that's

00:22:33.200 --> 00:22:35.079
because you have not integrated quite as well

00:22:35.079 --> 00:22:37.559
as a fake Geordie as I have. I think it's Tynemouth.

00:22:37.720 --> 00:22:40.960
Do you think? I think so, Max. If we have any

00:22:40.960 --> 00:22:43.559
listeners from the North East who are actually

00:22:43.559 --> 00:22:46.980
from here, tell us who is right. Yeah, Tynemouth

00:22:46.980 --> 00:22:51.339
or Tynemouth. Because down south it would be

00:22:51.339 --> 00:22:54.859
Muth, Tynemouth in Devon, I think. Portsmouth.

00:22:55.220 --> 00:22:57.960
Yes, but I think it's Muth here as well. I think

00:22:57.960 --> 00:23:00.740
it's in the middle where they say mouth. Right.

00:23:00.940 --> 00:23:05.279
I think. I think. Yeah. But then you've got Grangemouth,

00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:07.759
and I don't know where Grangemouth is. That doesn't

00:23:07.759 --> 00:23:09.539
help us if we don't know where it is. I think

00:23:09.539 --> 00:23:10.920
that's on the west coast somewhere. It might

00:23:10.920 --> 00:23:13.220
even be in Scotland. But that's not Grangemouth.

00:23:13.440 --> 00:23:18.380
That's Grangemouth. So yes, northeast listeners,

00:23:18.660 --> 00:23:26.019
tell us that I'm probably wrong. But anyway,

00:23:26.240 --> 00:23:28.319
I can't actually remember how we started the

00:23:28.319 --> 00:23:30.180
conversation in the car on the way to Tynemouth

00:23:30.180 --> 00:23:34.859
slash Mouth. I'm 100 % sure you brought it up

00:23:34.859 --> 00:23:36.779
because I remember having a moment of like, I

00:23:36.779 --> 00:23:39.940
don't know if I'd be into that, but I will give

00:23:39.940 --> 00:23:42.880
it a go. Yeah. But yeah, I'm not sure where it

00:23:42.880 --> 00:23:44.799
came from. I suspect because you spend a lot

00:23:44.799 --> 00:23:46.960
more time on Fat Life than me, reading things

00:23:46.960 --> 00:23:49.480
and looking at things and browsing through, you'd

00:23:49.480 --> 00:23:51.400
probably stumble across something that awoken

00:23:51.400 --> 00:23:55.259
something in you. Awoken. Yeah. Yeah, probably.

00:23:55.460 --> 00:23:56.920
But it was quite an interesting conversation

00:23:56.920 --> 00:24:01.329
because it was, it was. mostly me saying this

00:24:01.329 --> 00:24:03.529
is something that interests me but i don't want

00:24:03.529 --> 00:24:06.349
to disrespect your gender yes or my appearance

00:24:06.349 --> 00:24:08.650
you want to be very clear that it wasn't that

00:24:08.650 --> 00:24:10.730
i was not hot enough and you wanted to fix it

00:24:10.730 --> 00:24:13.470
yeah yeah definite which is not what it is about

00:24:13.470 --> 00:24:15.910
no disclaimer number three but yeah it was it

00:24:15.910 --> 00:24:18.250
was it was one of those conversations where i

00:24:18.250 --> 00:24:20.789
genuinely didn't think that anything would come

00:24:20.789 --> 00:24:22.769
of it i think i think i think you're probably

00:24:22.769 --> 00:24:24.269
right i think i've probably just seen something

00:24:24.269 --> 00:24:27.009
on set life and done a little bit of scooting

00:24:27.009 --> 00:24:30.420
about as you do and was like yeah this is this

00:24:30.420 --> 00:24:34.160
is an interesting idea um and then we just kind

00:24:34.160 --> 00:24:36.940
of kept having that conversation and by the end

00:24:36.940 --> 00:24:41.460
of the walk around time with flush mouth um we

00:24:41.460 --> 00:24:43.140
were like yeah let's let's work out how we can

00:24:43.140 --> 00:24:46.480
give it a go which is not how i expected that

00:24:46.480 --> 00:24:48.619
conversation to finish which you probably should

00:24:48.619 --> 00:24:50.140
have done because you know what i'm like if you

00:24:50.140 --> 00:24:57.779
mention it three times in my presence true Like

00:24:57.779 --> 00:24:59.839
the day you made a joke about Fyndon and now

00:24:59.839 --> 00:25:02.259
we are trying to figure out how we can make Fyndon

00:25:02.259 --> 00:25:05.380
work on my income. Yes. The answer may be that

00:25:05.380 --> 00:25:07.740
we can't, but it's hard to think about. Yeah.

00:25:09.200 --> 00:25:12.440
Well, I've even taken, you know, when you send

00:25:12.440 --> 00:25:14.440
me grocery food shopping money or something like

00:25:14.440 --> 00:25:16.660
that. Yeah. I've taken to replying to the text

00:25:16.660 --> 00:25:18.880
message saying, good piggy. I know, it's really

00:25:18.880 --> 00:25:22.640
hard. There you go. Maybe that's the extent of

00:25:22.640 --> 00:25:26.910
it. Maybe that's as affordable as it is. pretending

00:25:26.910 --> 00:25:31.690
like i'm training you or something yeah but yeah

00:25:31.690 --> 00:25:34.630
i think i'm i'm a general purpose kinky person

00:25:34.630 --> 00:25:37.730
apart from a few limits i can i can get into

00:25:37.730 --> 00:25:40.410
most things pretty quick and a lot of what makes

00:25:40.410 --> 00:25:43.710
kink hot to me is seeing how how you respond

00:25:43.710 --> 00:25:46.309
to it as well so there's things that you're into

00:25:46.309 --> 00:25:48.670
that i either hadn't had previous interest in

00:25:48.670 --> 00:25:50.710
or that i was just kind of like yeah that's kind

00:25:50.710 --> 00:25:53.230
of fun but it's not not top of my list i'm now

00:25:53.230 --> 00:25:56.089
a lot more into because i like seeing I like

00:25:56.089 --> 00:25:58.069
seeing that effect on you yeah I'm probably saying

00:25:58.069 --> 00:25:59.369
the other way around as well where there'll be

00:25:59.369 --> 00:26:01.170
things that you've got into through seeing how

00:26:01.170 --> 00:26:04.150
much I get off on them definitely yeah yeah definitely

00:26:04.150 --> 00:26:06.630
there's yeah some of the things that I've never

00:26:06.630 --> 00:26:09.869
done before before I met you and and you know

00:26:09.869 --> 00:26:11.410
driven by the fact that you're really into them

00:26:11.410 --> 00:26:14.289
and I enjoy I enjoy doing them but also enjoy

00:26:14.289 --> 00:26:17.069
that you you really get off on them as well yeah

00:26:17.069 --> 00:26:22.009
which is cool um So having established that we

00:26:22.009 --> 00:26:24.349
wanted to explore bimbification, we kind of went

00:26:24.349 --> 00:26:27.349
for it with some gusto. As we tend to, yeah.

00:26:27.470 --> 00:26:30.089
As we tend to. With very all or nothing. Yeah,

00:26:30.089 --> 00:26:33.690
yeah. And introduced, I don't think we, the rules

00:26:33.690 --> 00:26:36.130
that we've got now are much more detailed than

00:26:36.130 --> 00:26:40.049
they were at the start, I think. But we still

00:26:40.049 --> 00:26:42.130
made quite a lot of changes. Yeah, I'm trying

00:26:42.130 --> 00:26:44.430
to remember because we have definitely, in some

00:26:44.430 --> 00:26:46.130
cases, just clarified them a bit, but there's

00:26:46.130 --> 00:26:47.670
some that have been fully added as we've gone

00:26:47.670 --> 00:26:50.950
along. i think initially um obviously we kept

00:26:50.950 --> 00:26:52.549
the rule we had about appearance control but

00:26:52.549 --> 00:26:54.049
you made the decision that you were going to

00:26:54.049 --> 00:26:58.089
start doing it more yeah um you added a rule

00:26:58.089 --> 00:27:00.089
that i would wear makeup when instructed it wasn't

00:27:00.089 --> 00:27:02.009
every day initially but it was when instructed

00:27:02.009 --> 00:27:05.809
um that my hair would be styled in some way every

00:27:05.809 --> 00:27:07.970
day Because I'd been in a bit of a bad habit

00:27:07.970 --> 00:27:09.369
of sometimes letting my hair get really greasy

00:27:09.369 --> 00:27:11.069
and messy and then shoving a hat on for two days

00:27:11.069 --> 00:27:13.190
straight. Yeah. So you put a stop to that. And

00:27:13.190 --> 00:27:15.849
there was a rule in there that I could only wear

00:27:15.849 --> 00:27:18.650
one of a selection of approved bras. Yeah. So

00:27:18.650 --> 00:27:20.990
no sort of sports bras unless I was sleeping

00:27:20.990 --> 00:27:23.009
or doing sports. Like I could, the rest of the

00:27:23.009 --> 00:27:24.650
time I had to be wearing a proper bra. Yeah.

00:27:24.950 --> 00:27:29.250
And that may have been about, oh and tanning.

00:27:29.329 --> 00:27:32.390
We started the tanning stuff then as well. Yeah.

00:27:32.410 --> 00:27:36.440
And I got my first two mil of lip filler. Yeah.

00:27:36.559 --> 00:27:38.200
That went into the rules as well from the beginning

00:27:38.200 --> 00:27:40.940
that I would maintain filled lips and a tan.

00:27:41.440 --> 00:27:43.859
Yeah. Yeah. And we went on our proper shopping

00:27:43.859 --> 00:27:45.920
spree, didn't we? We did, yeah. A 10U shopping

00:27:45.920 --> 00:27:47.660
spree. A 10U shopping spree. Yeah, it's a 10U

00:27:47.660 --> 00:27:49.140
shopping spree. Because I'm on a budget. That's

00:27:49.140 --> 00:27:52.460
why I'm not into Fyndon. But we bought loads.

00:27:52.599 --> 00:27:58.000
We spent ages scrolling through 10U and we got

00:27:58.000 --> 00:28:02.359
all sorts of things. We got loads of skimpy little

00:28:02.359 --> 00:28:04.690
tops. I think you might have got some new bras

00:28:04.690 --> 00:28:07.130
because we want push -up -y, gooby -type bras.

00:28:07.210 --> 00:28:09.789
Yeah, I think I had one approved bra before we

00:28:09.789 --> 00:28:12.690
started, which we used to call Nice Bra with

00:28:12.690 --> 00:28:15.690
capital N, capital B. Yeah, Nice Bra. And if

00:28:15.690 --> 00:28:18.730
I wanted sex, I would wear Nice Bra and wander

00:28:18.730 --> 00:28:22.430
around the house in Nice Bra to get your attention.

00:28:22.589 --> 00:28:25.250
It was very effective. It was. Almost as effective

00:28:25.250 --> 00:28:27.450
as Big Hoodie No Pants. Big Hoodie No Pants is

00:28:27.450 --> 00:28:30.029
a good one. Yeah. Big Hoodie No Pants is better

00:28:30.029 --> 00:28:33.789
for winter. Quite cosy. But we bought all sorts.

00:28:33.829 --> 00:28:36.930
So we got some bras, loads of little tops, tight

00:28:36.930 --> 00:28:39.650
pants, like leggings and scrunched butt pants

00:28:39.650 --> 00:28:44.029
and stuff like that, didn't we? Lots of variations

00:28:44.029 --> 00:28:48.710
on leopard print and pink and stuff like that.

00:28:48.829 --> 00:28:52.369
It was quite a lot of fun just shopping for it.

00:28:52.470 --> 00:28:57.809
And I probably still do have a massive wish list

00:28:57.809 --> 00:29:01.000
in my 10U. on my Actemu app of stuff that I've

00:29:01.000 --> 00:29:03.799
seen before. And I do as well. I think we've

00:29:03.799 --> 00:29:05.180
been sort of holding off on getting any more

00:29:05.180 --> 00:29:07.059
because I'm also in the process of losing a little

00:29:07.059 --> 00:29:08.180
bit of weight at the minute. There's no point

00:29:08.180 --> 00:29:09.500
buying a load of clothes that probably won't

00:29:09.500 --> 00:29:12.779
fit me in six months. But yeah, always excited

00:29:12.779 --> 00:29:17.380
to restock the bimbo wardrobe. Yeah. I think

00:29:17.380 --> 00:29:20.299
what's been most fun for me in that way that

00:29:20.299 --> 00:29:22.880
once you get a kink, you just really fucking

00:29:22.880 --> 00:29:27.779
go for it. is kind of how much it's escalated

00:29:27.779 --> 00:29:31.240
from where we started yeah you know even in i

00:29:31.240 --> 00:29:33.000
suppose we're 10 months in now aren't we we started

00:29:33.000 --> 00:29:36.559
in january january ish it was it was the first

00:29:36.559 --> 00:29:38.819
january mix right treated it like a new year's

00:29:38.819 --> 00:29:42.140
resolution new year's resolution yeah yeah um

00:29:42.140 --> 00:29:46.000
so it's like we've gone from wearing makeup when

00:29:46.000 --> 00:29:49.160
instructed to having really detailed rules about

00:29:49.160 --> 00:29:51.799
what is acceptable makeup in different circumstances

00:29:51.799 --> 00:29:56.589
so really strict on makeup and and hair um really

00:29:56.589 --> 00:30:00.710
strict on um not just maintaining a tan but taking

00:30:00.710 --> 00:30:05.829
tanning injections to to boost it yep um putting

00:30:05.829 --> 00:30:09.230
more filler into your lips doing a lip flip talking

00:30:09.230 --> 00:30:13.970
about other kind of procedures yeah and because

00:30:13.970 --> 00:30:16.269
we've got it that you can instruct me to get

00:30:16.269 --> 00:30:19.670
any procedure yeah um and you haven't at this

00:30:19.670 --> 00:30:21.390
point told me to do anything that i wouldn't

00:30:21.390 --> 00:30:24.430
have wanted for myself yeah um and you haven't

00:30:25.070 --> 00:30:26.849
I wouldn't say you've stopped me from doing anything

00:30:26.849 --> 00:30:28.829
I would have wanted for myself, I think. No.

00:30:28.930 --> 00:30:30.609
I think last time I got some stuff done to my

00:30:30.609 --> 00:30:32.470
lips, you said if I wanted to do anything else

00:30:32.470 --> 00:30:34.470
to my face, you wanted to hold off until we'd

00:30:34.470 --> 00:30:36.289
kind of got used to that and the lips were fully

00:30:36.289 --> 00:30:39.509
settled in and things like that. But you haven't

00:30:39.509 --> 00:30:41.369
outright said you can't do that or that you have

00:30:41.369 --> 00:30:44.670
to do that. But it's that option. Again, sometimes

00:30:44.670 --> 00:30:47.470
some of the most fun that we have with rules

00:30:47.470 --> 00:30:48.890
are with rules that you actually don't really

00:30:48.890 --> 00:30:50.650
take advantage of, but it's just nice to have

00:30:50.650 --> 00:30:54.210
them there. Yeah, I can if I want. yeah sort

00:30:54.210 --> 00:30:58.269
of uh sort of thing yeah and i think the thing

00:30:58.269 --> 00:31:00.430
about your suggestions that you've made about

00:31:00.430 --> 00:31:03.029
other procedures for your face was i think mostly

00:31:03.029 --> 00:31:04.970
because we weren't sure whether we were done

00:31:04.970 --> 00:31:07.410
with your lips yeah if that makes sense we kind

00:31:07.410 --> 00:31:12.130
of we started off with a couple of mil of filler

00:31:12.130 --> 00:31:13.970
in your lips then you went back and added another

00:31:13.970 --> 00:31:16.869
couple of mil no what another one i don't think

00:31:16.869 --> 00:31:19.529
my lips would hold another uh and then you had

00:31:19.529 --> 00:31:23.359
a lip flip yeah done which is Botox, I think.

00:31:23.500 --> 00:31:26.319
It is, yes, Max. I love how you barely know what

00:31:26.319 --> 00:31:27.859
I'm having injected in my face. You just had

00:31:27.859 --> 00:31:29.680
me over the money to do it. It gave me permission.

00:31:29.859 --> 00:31:32.240
Yeah, yeah. Then I come out with my lips bigger

00:31:32.240 --> 00:31:36.839
and you're like, oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. But

00:31:36.839 --> 00:31:38.220
some of those other things that you were talking

00:31:38.220 --> 00:31:41.240
about, I think just wanted to make sure that

00:31:41.240 --> 00:31:44.119
we were, we'd reached a level with that. Yeah.

00:31:44.200 --> 00:31:47.490
So it didn't start to. messed stuff up I suppose

00:31:47.490 --> 00:31:48.970
yeah and to be fair I was glad of the waiting

00:31:48.970 --> 00:31:50.630
period because I was thinking that some cheek

00:31:50.630 --> 00:31:52.630
filler might suit me and then I talked to a friend

00:31:52.630 --> 00:31:54.450
who'd had cheek filler and hated it and said

00:31:54.450 --> 00:31:56.650
that it made her face really round yeah and I

00:31:56.650 --> 00:31:59.750
was like maybe not then yeah yeah yeah because

00:31:59.750 --> 00:32:01.089
I was thinking it would define my cheekbones

00:32:01.089 --> 00:32:03.130
more but she said it actually made her face have

00:32:03.130 --> 00:32:06.789
less definition so I'm a bit right because I'm

00:32:06.789 --> 00:32:08.430
already quite hamster cheeked I don't want to

00:32:08.430 --> 00:32:10.250
I don't want to risk that you've got lush cheeks

00:32:10.250 --> 00:32:13.589
and we're having a conversation about your hair

00:32:13.589 --> 00:32:15.980
at the moment aren't we yes an ongoing conversation

00:32:15.980 --> 00:32:17.759
about what to do with your hair yeah and it's

00:32:17.759 --> 00:32:19.160
funny because when we first started this you

00:32:19.160 --> 00:32:20.880
were quite keen on bleaching it and i was like

00:32:20.880 --> 00:32:24.160
no this is the longest that i've ever had My

00:32:24.160 --> 00:32:25.880
hair, it's natural colour, completely virgin

00:32:25.880 --> 00:32:28.200
hair. I don't want to colour it at all. I mean,

00:32:28.940 --> 00:32:30.759
if you'd said you have to bleach it, I would

00:32:30.759 --> 00:32:32.400
have done it. But I wanted to make it clear that

00:32:32.400 --> 00:32:34.900
my feedback on it was that I was not happy. So

00:32:34.900 --> 00:32:36.619
you said, OK, OK, no blonde hair, it's fine.

00:32:36.920 --> 00:32:38.740
And then gradually over a few months, I sort

00:32:38.740 --> 00:32:40.339
of started coming around to it. I was like, actually,

00:32:40.420 --> 00:32:42.140
you know what? That would really top off this

00:32:42.140 --> 00:32:44.559
look, especially with the tan. The colours I'm

00:32:44.559 --> 00:32:46.279
wearing, I really like the idea of bleaching

00:32:46.279 --> 00:32:47.819
my hair. And then it comes to you and you're

00:32:47.819 --> 00:32:49.319
like, actually, I was thinking if you're up for

00:32:49.319 --> 00:32:50.900
colouring, it may be going darker. It's like,

00:32:50.940 --> 00:33:00.519
what? yes yeah as as we do i suppose um so that's

00:33:00.519 --> 00:33:02.099
probably going to be a more collaborative effort

00:33:02.099 --> 00:33:04.960
than it is yeah me saying go and do this party

00:33:04.960 --> 00:33:06.799
because i just don't know what i'm talking about

00:33:06.799 --> 00:33:13.279
um and and don't fully understand i i know a

00:33:13.279 --> 00:33:16.079
good look when i see it yeah but i struggle with

00:33:16.079 --> 00:33:19.819
the visioning it yeah you know what would you

00:33:19.819 --> 00:33:21.519
look like with a particular style of hair kind

00:33:21.519 --> 00:33:23.740
of kind of thing it's it's difficult for me to

00:33:23.740 --> 00:33:27.700
get my head around so i need your input yeah

00:33:27.700 --> 00:33:33.099
i'm thinking about a shag mix i'm always up for

00:33:33.099 --> 00:33:40.099
a shag baby i thought you'd enjoy that no like

00:33:40.099 --> 00:33:42.039
i think like something with some choppy layers

00:33:42.039 --> 00:33:45.230
would probably be it A good way to go for the

00:33:45.230 --> 00:33:46.609
cut, but God knows what I'm going to do with

00:33:46.609 --> 00:33:48.349
the colour. By the time this episode comes out,

00:33:48.410 --> 00:33:49.789
we'll have probably decided and people will be

00:33:49.789 --> 00:33:51.329
listening to this being like, I know what you

00:33:51.329 --> 00:33:55.470
did and it was great or it sucks. Who knows?

00:33:56.069 --> 00:33:58.869
True. So it's kind of built over time. Quite

00:33:58.869 --> 00:34:01.630
happy with where we're at at the moment. I suppose

00:34:01.630 --> 00:34:02.930
the other thing you've done as well is kind of

00:34:02.930 --> 00:34:05.450
with a bigger piercing in your nose. Yeah, I

00:34:05.450 --> 00:34:06.910
don't think I was even wearing my septum ring

00:34:06.910 --> 00:34:10.130
until this year. I've had it for years, but I'd

00:34:10.130 --> 00:34:12.469
gone through a phase of not being that bothered

00:34:12.469 --> 00:34:14.809
about putting anything in it. Yeah. And then

00:34:14.809 --> 00:34:16.750
I got some septum rings and then you decided

00:34:16.750 --> 00:34:18.670
that you like something big and chunky that you

00:34:18.670 --> 00:34:21.429
can attach a leash to. Yeah. So we did that.

00:34:21.610 --> 00:34:24.050
We did that. And I did that. You did. And it

00:34:24.050 --> 00:34:28.530
was weighing you down a little bit. Yeah. Yeah,

00:34:28.570 --> 00:34:30.250
you took me on a little pig walk. At camping,

00:34:30.329 --> 00:34:34.989
not just at the local park. Yeah. At a specific

00:34:34.989 --> 00:34:41.530
kink event. Yes. So, yeah, it's evolved well.

00:34:42.780 --> 00:34:45.179
But I think it's always evolved at a pace that

00:34:45.179 --> 00:34:47.360
felt manageable. Yeah. Because it was a lot of

00:34:47.360 --> 00:34:50.699
changes to the rules initially. But it all became

00:34:50.699 --> 00:34:52.739
routine very quickly. And then the little tweaks

00:34:52.739 --> 00:34:54.639
we've made have just added a little bit extra

00:34:54.639 --> 00:34:57.739
work here or there. Yeah. Things getting a little

00:34:57.739 --> 00:35:01.420
bit stricter about body hair. Yeah. So initially

00:35:01.420 --> 00:35:03.500
the only rule we had, and this was actually before

00:35:03.500 --> 00:35:05.599
we started the bimbofication stuff, was that

00:35:05.599 --> 00:35:08.900
you had a rule about how I styled my pubic hair.

00:35:09.059 --> 00:35:11.579
Yeah. It was initially maintaining a strip and

00:35:11.579 --> 00:35:16.699
then we went. all off. But with, as this year's

00:35:16.699 --> 00:35:19.719
gone on, then we've added shaking my legs to

00:35:19.719 --> 00:35:22.619
that, plucking my eyebrows. Yeah. I think that's

00:35:22.619 --> 00:35:24.460
it. Yeah, that's everything. Still got hairy

00:35:24.460 --> 00:35:27.820
armpits. Still got hairy armpits. That's good.

00:35:28.519 --> 00:35:31.380
You a fan of the hairy armpits mix? Well, I've

00:35:31.380 --> 00:35:33.119
never really had a strong opinion either way.

00:35:33.320 --> 00:35:35.579
Yeah. I don't have that much hair there, to be

00:35:35.579 --> 00:35:39.260
fair. No? I always wanted more. I always wanted

00:35:39.260 --> 00:35:41.539
like proper like... dark thick armpit hair i

00:35:41.539 --> 00:35:43.699
don't know yeah yeah but i don't have it that's

00:35:43.699 --> 00:35:46.480
fair no i'm not one of these people that has

00:35:46.480 --> 00:35:49.260
a strong opinion either way yeah and i think

00:35:49.260 --> 00:35:51.719
that's probably true of other body hair as well

00:35:51.719 --> 00:35:54.300
yeah because it wasn't it was never about you

00:35:54.300 --> 00:35:56.159
being like i don't like this hair get rid of

00:35:56.159 --> 00:35:59.199
it it was what can i take control over yeah yeah

00:35:59.199 --> 00:36:02.860
yeah yeah it was it was imposing my will yeah

00:36:02.860 --> 00:36:04.739
on on it it was a it was one of those because

00:36:04.739 --> 00:36:08.760
i can kind of romance and i could have gone either

00:36:08.760 --> 00:36:13.460
way with it If I'm being honest, it's never really

00:36:13.460 --> 00:36:16.219
been a thing for me. Bodies are bodies. Yeah.

00:36:16.820 --> 00:36:20.300
And I liked having hairy legs. I've always, pretty

00:36:20.300 --> 00:36:23.079
much always. But it was you that suggested. It

00:36:23.079 --> 00:36:25.519
was, yeah. It was. So yeah, I used to like my

00:36:25.519 --> 00:36:28.000
hairy legs, but I just started feeling like they're

00:36:28.000 --> 00:36:30.019
more wheeling into this aesthetic. There were

00:36:30.019 --> 00:36:32.320
times where they looked like a clash of image

00:36:32.320 --> 00:36:34.000
in a really good way, in a really hot way. It

00:36:34.000 --> 00:36:36.300
was like... I like that sort of contrast between

00:36:36.300 --> 00:36:38.679
little short skirt and hairy legs. But sometimes

00:36:38.679 --> 00:36:40.519
some of the things I'm wearing, it's like, actually,

00:36:40.579 --> 00:36:42.679
I just want this look to look like the look.

00:36:42.800 --> 00:36:45.039
I don't want something to distract from the nice

00:36:45.039 --> 00:36:46.840
dress I'm wearing, the nice heels I'm wearing.

00:36:46.980 --> 00:36:49.059
I don't want to have to think about things like

00:36:49.059 --> 00:36:51.000
fishnets looking like a hedgehog trapped in a

00:36:51.000 --> 00:36:55.719
basket. I've got those leggings that we've got

00:36:55.719 --> 00:36:57.960
with the slits in them. I don't want the little

00:36:57.960 --> 00:37:00.829
bushes sprouting out of all the things. It's

00:37:00.829 --> 00:37:03.190
like hairy legs are good, but hairy legs with

00:37:03.190 --> 00:37:05.170
some of the clothes that I'm wearing now. Yeah.

00:37:05.210 --> 00:37:06.829
I just was feeling like it made the look look

00:37:06.829 --> 00:37:09.369
a little bit unfinished. Yeah, that's fair. The

00:37:09.369 --> 00:37:11.090
pubic hair thing, like, has always been a preference

00:37:11.090 --> 00:37:13.449
for me to at least trim it. I don't like the

00:37:13.449 --> 00:37:16.630
feel of a full bush on me. So I was already shaving

00:37:16.630 --> 00:37:18.909
it into a strip when I met you. You set some

00:37:18.909 --> 00:37:20.909
rules around, like, how narrow the strip had

00:37:20.909 --> 00:37:22.809
to be and how frequently it had to be maintained

00:37:22.809 --> 00:37:24.750
and stuff. Yeah, yeah. And, like, the length

00:37:24.750 --> 00:37:26.489
of it, because I used to like my landing strip

00:37:26.489 --> 00:37:29.559
quite bushy. Yeah. Like, narrow but bushy. and

00:37:29.559 --> 00:37:32.059
you put a stop to that you liked it a little

00:37:32.059 --> 00:37:37.360
bit a little bit more groomed yeah and then I

00:37:37.360 --> 00:37:39.460
think that you decided to take it all off because

00:37:39.460 --> 00:37:41.900
I had that tiny little micro bikini the first

00:37:41.900 --> 00:37:44.639
time we went to Cyprus that sat lower than my

00:37:44.639 --> 00:37:46.260
pubic hairline and it just looked ridiculous

00:37:46.260 --> 00:37:50.619
it was like my bikini had a wig so that was that

00:37:50.619 --> 00:37:53.260
there was time for it to go yeah yeah I think

00:37:53.260 --> 00:37:55.480
yeah I think so it's all about the aesthetics

00:37:55.480 --> 00:38:00.980
yeah um So there's a lot of physical things that

00:38:00.980 --> 00:38:03.559
we've done. And anyone who knows you will have

00:38:03.559 --> 00:38:06.980
noticed that significant change in your appearance

00:38:06.980 --> 00:38:13.840
over the last almost year. But there's a mental

00:38:13.840 --> 00:38:17.800
aspect to, well, bimbofication generally. Yes.

00:38:18.000 --> 00:38:20.579
But there are some kind of mental, psychological

00:38:20.579 --> 00:38:23.860
aspects to what we do as well. Definitely, yeah.

00:38:23.980 --> 00:38:27.030
I think there's a common perception of it. I

00:38:27.030 --> 00:38:28.590
wouldn't necessarily say misconception, because

00:38:28.590 --> 00:38:30.530
this can be true for some people, but a common

00:38:30.530 --> 00:38:32.510
idea of bimbofication, the mental aspect of it,

00:38:32.550 --> 00:38:35.349
is about being stupid. It's about turning off

00:38:35.349 --> 00:38:37.090
big chunks of your brain and not really having

00:38:37.090 --> 00:38:40.190
any thoughts. And some people really enjoy taking

00:38:40.190 --> 00:38:43.670
it to that level. Probably not on a 24 -7 basis

00:38:43.670 --> 00:38:46.050
for very many people. Sometimes you've got to

00:38:46.050 --> 00:38:49.639
use your brain. It needs to be there. But for

00:38:49.639 --> 00:38:53.219
me, for us, but how I started to really experience

00:38:53.219 --> 00:38:56.500
like the bimbo headspace is it's not that I am

00:38:56.500 --> 00:39:00.139
stupid. It's not that my ability to think and

00:39:00.139 --> 00:39:02.900
make decisions and stuff isn't there. It's that

00:39:02.900 --> 00:39:05.300
I am narrowing my focus down. There's a simplification

00:39:05.300 --> 00:39:08.840
going on of what the purpose of my brain is in

00:39:08.840 --> 00:39:10.820
that moment. And this isn't something that I'm

00:39:10.820 --> 00:39:14.539
maintaining 24 -7 because I... we have a podcast

00:39:14.539 --> 00:39:18.079
i have a tiktok i have a blog i have a job um

00:39:18.079 --> 00:39:20.019
you know i need my brain to do lots of different

00:39:20.019 --> 00:39:23.380
things yeah but when we're choosing to enhance

00:39:23.380 --> 00:39:25.780
that headspace either during play or during sort

00:39:25.780 --> 00:39:29.139
of certain parts of our day in our routine it's

00:39:29.139 --> 00:39:30.960
about narrowing the focus of my brain down where

00:39:30.960 --> 00:39:34.440
all i'm basically thinking about is you fucking

00:39:34.440 --> 00:39:38.179
me and how i can be more useful to you yeah that

00:39:38.179 --> 00:39:41.639
just very singular purpose yeah and a sort of

00:39:41.639 --> 00:39:44.860
effect of that can be feeling a little bit stupid

00:39:44.860 --> 00:39:48.619
or a little bit almost drunk off it um but it's

00:39:48.619 --> 00:39:51.559
not that my intellect is shut down or or closed

00:39:51.559 --> 00:39:54.800
off yeah it's just it's on hold for a minute

00:39:54.800 --> 00:39:57.239
yeah i'm focused on what i'm supposed to be being

00:39:57.239 --> 00:40:00.039
useful for yeah and i think that was that was

00:40:00.039 --> 00:40:03.679
quite important to me when we were talking about

00:40:03.679 --> 00:40:05.880
it in the in the in the early days i suppose

00:40:05.880 --> 00:40:08.760
and and as it's developed is i really like the

00:40:08.760 --> 00:40:12.119
way that your brain works yeah i like how smart

00:40:12.119 --> 00:40:17.079
you are i like how creative you are um and didn't

00:40:17.079 --> 00:40:18.760
want to do anything that was kind of there was

00:40:18.760 --> 00:40:22.320
a risk of diminishing that yeah and i suppose

00:40:22.320 --> 00:40:26.199
you know bimbofication as an idea that is i think

00:40:26.199 --> 00:40:31.039
is about simplification as much as it is about

00:40:31.039 --> 00:40:34.840
dumbing down but not diminishing your intelligence

00:40:34.840 --> 00:40:37.940
as a result of that i think is quite important

00:40:37.940 --> 00:40:41.260
yeah quite important for me definitely and it

00:40:41.260 --> 00:40:43.300
can be quite a fine line there's definitely you

00:40:43.300 --> 00:40:46.139
know things we do during play where we're involving

00:40:46.139 --> 00:40:49.400
stuff that really intensifies our headspace there's

00:40:49.400 --> 00:40:51.619
maybe a lot of overstimulation going on the things

00:40:51.619 --> 00:40:53.460
like poppets like i could definitely end up in

00:40:53.460 --> 00:40:56.219
a state where i'm like head empty no thoughts

00:40:56.219 --> 00:40:58.480
yeah yeah absolutely nothing going on upstairs

00:40:58.480 --> 00:41:01.219
which is great But it's very short bursts like

00:41:01.219 --> 00:41:04.119
that. And most of the time, the sort of headspace

00:41:04.119 --> 00:41:06.699
that I get into when I'm doing the stuff that

00:41:06.699 --> 00:41:08.000
is part of the rules, you know, like getting

00:41:08.000 --> 00:41:10.260
into my makeup, doing my hair, getting into the

00:41:10.260 --> 00:41:12.760
outfits and stuff. It's a much lighter version

00:41:12.760 --> 00:41:15.719
of that headspace where it's just like, I don't

00:41:15.719 --> 00:41:17.960
need to burden myself with all of the big thoughts

00:41:17.960 --> 00:41:20.460
right now. I'm just making myself useful in the

00:41:20.460 --> 00:41:22.980
way that I've been instructed to. Yeah. And maybe

00:41:22.980 --> 00:41:29.929
if I do it right, I'll get some dick. Yes. Yeah.

00:41:29.929 --> 00:41:32.710
That's fascinating to me, that it's almost that

00:41:32.710 --> 00:41:35.469
process of doing your makeup and hair in the

00:41:35.469 --> 00:41:39.070
morning. It almost sounds meditative. It is,

00:41:39.070 --> 00:41:41.210
definitely, yeah. I think that's why it's ended

00:41:41.210 --> 00:41:44.210
up having such a positive effect on my routine

00:41:44.210 --> 00:41:46.369
and just my general well -being, which wasn't

00:41:46.369 --> 00:41:48.409
expected. We just got into this because it was

00:41:48.409 --> 00:41:51.690
another fun way for you to control me. But I

00:41:51.690 --> 00:41:55.190
found, weirdly, bimbofication has, I think, made

00:41:55.190 --> 00:41:57.610
me better at my job. because I've got a little

00:41:57.610 --> 00:41:59.710
buffer in the morning where I can be a little

00:41:59.710 --> 00:42:02.369
bit head empty yeah and I've got something that

00:42:02.369 --> 00:42:04.150
happens between getting up and going to work

00:42:04.150 --> 00:42:06.090
similar to the purpose the commute serves for

00:42:06.090 --> 00:42:09.869
people yeah um where I'm in a really positive

00:42:09.869 --> 00:42:11.949
headspace because the bimbo headspace is always

00:42:11.949 --> 00:42:14.449
really positive and then I go and do my job and

00:42:14.449 --> 00:42:17.329
make big serious decisions with financial implications

00:42:17.329 --> 00:42:20.170
and I can do it because I've because I've had

00:42:20.170 --> 00:42:25.019
a minute you know yeah yeah yeah I was going

00:42:25.019 --> 00:42:27.039
to say I can relate to that I can relate to that

00:42:27.039 --> 00:42:32.679
as a former commuter where you know back before

00:42:32.679 --> 00:42:34.760
I learned to drive and had a car I would sit

00:42:34.760 --> 00:42:37.159
on the bus for an hour and actually it's a really

00:42:37.159 --> 00:42:41.400
nice way of weirdly really nice way of starting

00:42:41.400 --> 00:42:43.440
and ending your day because I think you can have

00:42:43.440 --> 00:42:45.840
a bit of a nap just stare into space and watch

00:42:45.840 --> 00:42:48.539
the world go by on the bus or you can read a

00:42:48.539 --> 00:42:51.760
book or you can kind of decompress from the shitty

00:42:51.760 --> 00:42:53.699
day that you've had full of meetings kind of

00:42:53.699 --> 00:42:56.920
thing so yeah I can see how yeah I'm going to

00:42:56.920 --> 00:42:58.559
remind you of this conversation which we now

00:42:58.559 --> 00:43:01.239
have recorded next time that you have to get

00:43:01.239 --> 00:43:02.519
a bus somewhere and you're complaining about

00:43:02.519 --> 00:43:06.039
it yeah yeah because you you throw a tantrum

00:43:06.039 --> 00:43:07.900
now you have to get a bus for any reason yeah

00:43:07.900 --> 00:43:11.320
end of the world yeah because I've been driving

00:43:11.320 --> 00:43:16.579
my own car for over a decade Just play it back

00:43:16.579 --> 00:43:18.679
to you. It's really nice. I'm going to sit and

00:43:18.679 --> 00:43:23.139
watch the world go by. Yeah, yeah, it is. When

00:43:23.139 --> 00:43:28.519
you've got no other choice. But I did, just to

00:43:28.519 --> 00:43:30.380
go on a really random tangent, I did have that

00:43:30.380 --> 00:43:32.300
period after I started, after I learned to drive

00:43:32.300 --> 00:43:35.739
and started driving into work, of actually quite

00:43:35.739 --> 00:43:39.260
missing it. Yeah. Because I wasn't, you know,

00:43:39.260 --> 00:43:42.199
as a new driver, trying to drive into the centre

00:43:42.199 --> 00:43:45.860
of Newcastle. every day. It's not a relaxing

00:43:45.860 --> 00:43:48.800
experience. No, I've heard this. I have never

00:43:48.800 --> 00:43:51.880
driven into Newcastle only being driven. I will

00:43:51.880 --> 00:43:53.599
probably keep it that way even if I do learn

00:43:53.599 --> 00:43:56.079
to drive. I would simply not go there. Yeah,

00:43:56.079 --> 00:44:01.039
yeah. First time I drove home from working a

00:44:01.039 --> 00:44:05.820
company hire car that people I used to work for

00:44:05.820 --> 00:44:08.059
had a bunch of cars you could hire. You could

00:44:08.059 --> 00:44:09.539
take them home for the night. First time I did

00:44:09.539 --> 00:44:11.219
that after passing my test I got home and I cried.

00:44:11.500 --> 00:44:14.489
Oh God. Driving out of Newcastle at rush hour

00:44:14.489 --> 00:44:16.429
for the first time in your life, absolutely terrifying.

00:44:16.670 --> 00:44:19.329
Oh, bless you. I cried when I got out of the

00:44:19.329 --> 00:44:22.769
car because it was horrible. But anyway, but

00:44:22.769 --> 00:44:25.269
there are some things that we do. Back to the

00:44:25.269 --> 00:44:27.690
topic. Back to the topic, yes. There are some

00:44:27.690 --> 00:44:30.949
things that we do, mostly during play, but sometimes

00:44:30.949 --> 00:44:35.449
outside of play, to kind of enhance that bimbo

00:44:35.449 --> 00:44:38.250
-y feeling. Yeah. So we've been a little bit

00:44:38.250 --> 00:44:40.820
hit and miss about edging. Yeah, we call it daily

00:44:40.820 --> 00:44:43.539
edging and it's really not. But it's quite frequent.

00:44:43.760 --> 00:44:48.699
Yeah, fairly frequent edging. And when we do,

00:44:48.780 --> 00:44:51.340
particularly when we do kind of sensory deprivation

00:44:51.340 --> 00:44:54.360
stuff, I like to have really loud porn playing

00:44:54.360 --> 00:44:57.519
in your ears. Yeah. So not the visuals of it,

00:44:57.539 --> 00:45:00.440
just the soundtrack. So it's lots of sucking

00:45:00.440 --> 00:45:03.780
and slurping and groaning and grunting and stuff.

00:45:04.179 --> 00:45:06.880
Yeah. I like the squelchy noises. You like the

00:45:06.880 --> 00:45:09.260
squelchy noises. But there's a couple as well

00:45:09.260 --> 00:45:15.380
where it's kind of got almost like a bimbo mantra

00:45:15.380 --> 00:45:18.000
vibe to it, like you are a bimbo, you are a fucked

00:45:18.000 --> 00:45:21.119
-all bimbo, you are built for sex, that sort

00:45:21.119 --> 00:45:24.119
of thing, kind of having that blasting in your

00:45:24.119 --> 00:45:26.619
ears, which is a lot of the stuff we've used

00:45:26.619 --> 00:45:29.539
in The Interrogation as well, which there is

00:45:29.539 --> 00:45:31.000
a whole episode about that, go and listen to

00:45:31.000 --> 00:45:34.829
it, it's really good. I love how actively you

00:45:34.829 --> 00:45:36.969
promote all the content. You're like, here's

00:45:36.969 --> 00:45:39.050
another good episode we did. Here's a blog post

00:45:39.050 --> 00:45:41.309
that Carisel did. And I'm just vibing like, yeah.

00:45:42.289 --> 00:45:44.429
Is that not what you're supposed to do? It absolutely

00:45:44.429 --> 00:45:46.469
is. It's just you're so enthusiastic and I'm

00:45:46.469 --> 00:45:48.989
so bad at it. I'm always like quite apologetic

00:45:48.989 --> 00:45:50.469
with promoting anything I've made. It's like,

00:45:50.489 --> 00:45:52.030
yeah, I made this. If you want to look at it,

00:45:52.090 --> 00:45:55.010
you don't have to. But then you just hype up

00:45:55.010 --> 00:45:56.869
everything. So I don't know. Go and look at this.

00:45:56.949 --> 00:46:01.480
It's really good. Anyway, sorry, I don't know.

00:46:01.739 --> 00:46:06.260
Carizal .com at Carizal on TikTok. So, yeah,

00:46:06.260 --> 00:46:08.460
we do that in, you know, playing all the kind

00:46:08.460 --> 00:46:10.059
of porn voices and stuff like that, especially

00:46:10.059 --> 00:46:11.980
when we're doing sensory deprivation. Yeah. Kind

00:46:11.980 --> 00:46:14.760
of thing, which I think is a really good way

00:46:14.760 --> 00:46:17.460
to fuck with your head a little bit. Yeah. You

00:46:17.460 --> 00:46:19.539
know, so you can't hear anything. But you have

00:46:19.539 --> 00:46:22.199
a bimbo playlist as well. Yes, I have a bimbo

00:46:22.199 --> 00:46:24.579
playlist of music that helps me get into the

00:46:24.579 --> 00:46:27.539
headspace. For a good while at the beginning

00:46:27.539 --> 00:46:29.900
of this, I was putting that on every single time

00:46:29.900 --> 00:46:32.039
I was doing my makeup, when I was doing my hair,

00:46:32.099 --> 00:46:34.019
when I was getting dressed. And I think I'd like

00:46:34.019 --> 00:46:35.699
to start getting back into doing that, even if

00:46:35.699 --> 00:46:37.420
it's just while I'm doing my makeup every day

00:46:37.420 --> 00:46:39.480
and listening to like, I do my makeup pretty

00:46:39.480 --> 00:46:40.880
quickly usually, so it'll be like three or four

00:46:40.880 --> 00:46:43.300
songs, but it's still, it's a nice little routine

00:46:43.300 --> 00:46:46.260
to be in. I think that little tether to it. Yeah.

00:46:46.739 --> 00:46:48.400
And we've talked about that a little bit, haven't

00:46:48.400 --> 00:46:51.460
we? Because, you know, we go through peaks and

00:46:51.460 --> 00:46:55.139
drops with the edging. We quite like the idea

00:46:55.139 --> 00:46:58.179
of, you know maybe not an interrogation style

00:46:58.179 --> 00:47:01.440
but making you watch porn while being edged or

00:47:01.440 --> 00:47:05.139
just because yeah and and being more conscious

00:47:05.139 --> 00:47:09.119
about finding opportunities to get into that

00:47:09.119 --> 00:47:12.739
mental space yeah because with a lot of these

00:47:12.739 --> 00:47:15.360
things that we do we kind of start doing it and

00:47:15.360 --> 00:47:18.380
we go hell for leather it becomes kind of normal

00:47:18.380 --> 00:47:22.319
yeah and then we're not really sure necessarily

00:47:22.319 --> 00:47:24.099
where to take it next and some of the things

00:47:24.099 --> 00:47:25.739
that we do where we would take it next would

00:47:25.739 --> 00:47:29.440
probably kill you so we don't but with this that

00:47:29.440 --> 00:47:31.840
feels a little bit safer yeah yeah definitely

00:47:31.840 --> 00:47:34.260
but i think some of it it's not that things drift

00:47:34.260 --> 00:47:38.059
sort of out of us doing them it's that we start

00:47:38.059 --> 00:47:39.659
noticing them as much because they're just part

00:47:39.659 --> 00:47:41.179
of the furniture so like the edging we could

00:47:41.179 --> 00:47:44.079
probably could be a bit more disciplined about

00:47:44.079 --> 00:47:46.360
making sure that we fit it in um i could use

00:47:46.360 --> 00:47:49.000
my playlist a little bit more but i think you

00:47:49.000 --> 00:47:50.960
probably underestimate how often you knock me

00:47:50.960 --> 00:47:54.480
into the bimbo headspace with the orgasm denial

00:47:54.480 --> 00:47:56.219
that we've had since pretty much day one in the

00:47:56.219 --> 00:47:59.599
relationship um if i'm horny and you keep me

00:47:59.599 --> 00:48:02.159
in that state for a couple of days i start losing

00:48:02.159 --> 00:48:05.599
chunks of my brain real quick um yeah yeah and

00:48:06.760 --> 00:48:08.820
and there's a lot of things that we do during

00:48:08.820 --> 00:48:11.460
play where the style of your degradation a lot

00:48:11.460 --> 00:48:13.139
of the time has started to lean into that as

00:48:13.139 --> 00:48:15.539
well and things that you figured out how to say

00:48:15.539 --> 00:48:17.460
to activate that in me when my brain just kind

00:48:17.460 --> 00:48:20.139
of starts shutting chunks off and i just start

00:48:20.139 --> 00:48:23.199
feeling more and more kind of just floaty and

00:48:23.199 --> 00:48:28.239
focused on on the moment and nicely head empty

00:48:28.239 --> 00:48:31.280
yeah not exactly not stupid but definitely narrowed

00:48:31.280 --> 00:48:34.980
down yeah yeah i think i yeah i've been trying

00:48:34.980 --> 00:48:39.849
to be more objectifying i suppose yeah in it

00:48:39.849 --> 00:48:44.170
which i know you enjoy um which is partly been

00:48:44.170 --> 00:48:46.449
by partly for you leaning into free use a little

00:48:46.449 --> 00:48:49.769
bit more um it took me a little while to get

00:48:49.769 --> 00:48:52.909
my head around yeah i think you definitely did

00:48:52.909 --> 00:48:55.010
a good job of hiding that you were still struggling

00:48:55.010 --> 00:48:56.389
to get your head around free use because there

00:48:56.389 --> 00:48:59.010
was a lot of free using going on yeah but i think

00:48:59.010 --> 00:49:00.690
you've definitely got more aggressive with it

00:49:00.690 --> 00:49:04.820
and more frequent with it yeah and Can I mention

00:49:04.820 --> 00:49:06.480
you not being on meds anymore, Mix? Or do you

00:49:06.480 --> 00:49:09.639
rather I didn't? yeah and i think your um your

00:49:09.639 --> 00:49:12.280
free use behavior definitely had a big spike

00:49:12.280 --> 00:49:14.840
that has continued to go up and stay up since

00:49:14.840 --> 00:49:16.579
you came off your antidepressants a few months

00:49:16.579 --> 00:49:19.719
ago yeah like i was trying to be really objective

00:49:19.719 --> 00:49:21.400
with it and be like i will support you whatever

00:49:21.400 --> 00:49:23.940
decision you make i whatever is best for your

00:49:23.940 --> 00:49:26.079
mental health your overall well -being whatever

00:49:26.079 --> 00:49:28.400
is the right decision for you i have no opinion

00:49:28.400 --> 00:49:31.039
i'm just here to support you yeah but this this

00:49:31.039 --> 00:49:34.820
unmedicated dick please let me keep getting this

00:49:34.820 --> 00:49:43.760
unmedicated dick Terrible. Yeah. Terrible. I

00:49:43.760 --> 00:49:46.599
understand. I mean, it was great before as well,

00:49:46.619 --> 00:49:49.719
but I am definitely getting more quantity. Yeah.

00:49:53.239 --> 00:49:56.219
Quality consistently... No, quality consistently

00:49:56.219 --> 00:49:59.659
good. Quantity increasing with no increasing

00:49:59.659 --> 00:50:03.579
quality. Well, it's very kind of you to say.

00:50:07.309 --> 00:50:09.090
So there are some things that we do around the

00:50:09.090 --> 00:50:11.510
kind of the mental side of it, which really worked

00:50:11.510 --> 00:50:16.909
well for us and wanting to lean into that. But

00:50:16.909 --> 00:50:19.170
there's a whole thing out there, isn't there?

00:50:19.469 --> 00:50:23.010
We jokingly refer to kind of fake hypno porn

00:50:23.010 --> 00:50:26.550
videos. But there's a whole industry around using

00:50:26.550 --> 00:50:30.650
hypnosis as a way of inducing a bimbo -like trance.

00:50:31.099 --> 00:50:33.480
yeah state and that's something i would be interested

00:50:33.480 --> 00:50:35.780
in exploring but i think i wouldn't want to do

00:50:35.780 --> 00:50:38.000
it with pre -recorded stuff someone else has

00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:39.880
made where you don't really know the quality

00:50:39.880 --> 00:50:41.699
of it or how effective it's going to be or how

00:50:41.699 --> 00:50:44.019
safe it's going to be yeah um i think one of

00:50:44.019 --> 00:50:46.300
the things that is sort of on our list to to

00:50:46.300 --> 00:50:48.380
start looking into in the future probably a next

00:50:48.380 --> 00:50:50.139
year job now is to start learning a little bit

00:50:50.139 --> 00:50:52.800
more about hypno as a kink in general yeah and

00:50:52.800 --> 00:50:54.280
we're lucky to know some people who are really

00:50:54.280 --> 00:50:56.500
into it who made some suggestions to point us

00:50:56.500 --> 00:50:57.980
in the right direction who we can bounce ideas

00:50:57.980 --> 00:51:01.679
off yeah um I think if you get good at hypnotising

00:51:01.679 --> 00:51:03.619
people, then there's a lot of potential there

00:51:03.619 --> 00:51:06.619
for a lot of our kinks to be enhanced with hypno.

00:51:06.639 --> 00:51:08.820
But I think bimbofication particularly, I think,

00:51:08.820 --> 00:51:11.860
would go really nicely with it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:51:12.320 --> 00:51:15.219
Because that is quite an attractive idea to me.

00:51:15.360 --> 00:51:18.840
Yeah. It's just being able to, you know, figuratively

00:51:18.840 --> 00:51:22.199
snap my fingers and you just become this drooling,

00:51:22.199 --> 00:51:25.900
cock -obsessed mess. And even bigger. drooling,

00:51:25.900 --> 00:51:29.039
cock -obsessed mess than you currently are. I

00:51:29.039 --> 00:51:30.119
was going to say, you don't know how to snap

00:51:30.119 --> 00:51:34.280
your fingers. You just approach me. It just exists.

00:51:34.739 --> 00:51:42.400
Yeah. I'm just like that. Yeah. But, like, really

00:51:42.400 --> 00:51:45.960
kind of ramping that up and having it, again,

00:51:46.179 --> 00:51:49.139
that level of control over it, I think it's a

00:51:49.139 --> 00:51:51.320
really hot idea. Yeah. So, yeah, we'll put that

00:51:51.320 --> 00:51:53.739
on the list. We'll make that one around 2026.

00:51:54.980 --> 00:51:58.039
kink tensions yes excellent so are you leading

00:51:58.039 --> 00:51:59.800
into this one i'm leading into this one i guess

00:51:59.800 --> 00:52:01.739
i'm asking you next the problem that i'm having

00:52:01.739 --> 00:52:03.599
though with recording this episode is the more

00:52:03.599 --> 00:52:05.860
we talk about bimbofication my headspace is slipping

00:52:05.860 --> 00:52:08.800
a bit i feel myself like twirling my hair yeah

00:52:08.800 --> 00:52:12.659
and sort of like i'm i'm getting a bit stupid

00:52:12.659 --> 00:52:15.239
yeah so yeah yeah talking intelligently about

00:52:15.239 --> 00:52:17.099
bimbofication is a challenge for me because my

00:52:17.099 --> 00:52:20.300
brain starts and i just start this might not

00:52:20.300 --> 00:52:22.980
be our strongest episode then maybe not fortunately

00:52:22.980 --> 00:52:25.900
you have a fully functioning brain so yes we'll

00:52:25.900 --> 00:52:29.039
be fine um but yeah i was supposed to be asking

00:52:29.039 --> 00:52:30.579
you a question to lead into the next section

00:52:30.579 --> 00:52:33.179
and it's gone already which is oh no terrible

00:52:33.179 --> 00:52:36.139
there we go um so one of the things you've mentioned

00:52:36.139 --> 00:52:38.579
a couple of times uh your your sort of persistent

00:52:38.579 --> 00:52:41.760
disclaimer is that none of this was about being

00:52:41.760 --> 00:52:44.219
dissatisfied with my appearance wanting to fix

00:52:44.219 --> 00:52:46.900
flaws in me or make me hotter yeah so talk me

00:52:46.900 --> 00:52:49.760
through a little bit about that why first kind

00:52:49.760 --> 00:52:51.639
of why is that really important for you to be

00:52:51.639 --> 00:52:54.219
clear about mix but also what is it that this

00:52:54.219 --> 00:52:58.480
is about for you more yeah um oh that's a really

00:52:58.480 --> 00:53:01.699
big question i knew it was coming yeah i know

00:53:01.699 --> 00:53:04.019
i got my brain capacity for that my brain and

00:53:04.019 --> 00:53:08.300
everything i think it's it is important to keep

00:53:08.300 --> 00:53:12.099
reminding you particularly and while we're talking

00:53:12.099 --> 00:53:17.989
about this to to to all that it's important for

00:53:17.989 --> 00:53:21.769
me to emphasize both when we're doing it kind

00:53:21.769 --> 00:53:24.469
of talking about it or doing it or talking about

00:53:24.469 --> 00:53:27.210
it on this podcast shall i start that bit again

00:53:27.210 --> 00:53:29.449
probably mix yeah are you going into bimbo i

00:53:29.449 --> 00:53:36.090
think so yeah what do i think what do i actually

00:53:36.090 --> 00:53:40.750
think No thoughts had empty. No thoughts had

00:53:40.750 --> 00:53:43.469
empty. Podcast is cancelled because we're both

00:53:43.469 --> 00:53:52.369
stupid. Yeah, I have made several disclaimers

00:53:52.369 --> 00:53:54.610
just in the recording of this episode. And whenever

00:53:54.610 --> 00:53:58.429
we talk about changes to your appearance, whether

00:53:58.429 --> 00:54:00.429
it's what you wear or what you do with your body,

00:54:00.530 --> 00:54:02.670
I've always been really keen to emphasise that

00:54:02.670 --> 00:54:04.989
it isn't coming from a place of dissatisfaction

00:54:04.989 --> 00:54:08.829
with your body. or your appearance as it currently

00:54:08.829 --> 00:54:11.949
is. Yeah. Because for me, it isn't about turning

00:54:11.949 --> 00:54:15.230
you into a better thing, a better version of

00:54:15.230 --> 00:54:19.869
you, because I wasn't attracted to and didn't

00:54:19.869 --> 00:54:21.690
fall in love with a better version of you, a

00:54:21.690 --> 00:54:24.829
potential future version of you. I was attracted

00:54:24.829 --> 00:54:27.030
to and fell in love with the you that you were

00:54:27.030 --> 00:54:30.389
when I met you, and that is still how I feel.

00:54:31.090 --> 00:54:32.710
Bimbofication and appearance control for me.

00:54:33.050 --> 00:54:35.670
is about control and objectification and actually

00:54:35.670 --> 00:54:40.090
being given the permission to change you into

00:54:40.090 --> 00:54:43.090
something which is still attractive to me and

00:54:43.090 --> 00:54:45.730
have that level of control over you and treat

00:54:45.730 --> 00:54:50.130
you like an object, properly treat you like an

00:54:50.130 --> 00:54:52.769
object and like a possession, I think is the

00:54:52.769 --> 00:54:56.530
key for me. And I think it would be really easy

00:54:56.530 --> 00:54:59.010
for that to turn into something where you feel

00:54:59.010 --> 00:55:03.610
like you're not good enough as you are. um and

00:55:03.610 --> 00:55:06.309
i don't want that yeah you know there's a real

00:55:06.309 --> 00:55:08.469
risk there of doing some psychological damage

00:55:08.469 --> 00:55:12.630
if we're not really careful about if i'm not

00:55:12.630 --> 00:55:15.789
really careful about how clear i am on that stuff

00:55:15.789 --> 00:55:18.230
yeah and you are really clear about it not just

00:55:18.230 --> 00:55:20.449
for the sake of the podcast recording in general

00:55:20.449 --> 00:55:22.949
you are always really clear about that with me

00:55:22.949 --> 00:55:25.949
um you sort of playfully but also quite seriously

00:55:25.949 --> 00:55:28.309
tell me off if i refer to it as like me getting

00:55:28.309 --> 00:55:32.400
hotter Or like fixing anything or anything. No,

00:55:32.559 --> 00:55:35.380
no, that's not what this is. And when I say stuff

00:55:35.380 --> 00:55:37.000
like that, I'm either joking or I'm talking about

00:55:37.000 --> 00:55:38.599
other people's perspectives. You know, one of

00:55:38.599 --> 00:55:40.579
the things that's been wild over the last 10

00:55:40.579 --> 00:55:42.760
months is suddenly becoming visible to straight

00:55:42.760 --> 00:55:45.199
men again, which I had not had to deal with.

00:55:45.300 --> 00:55:48.739
I apologise for that. So by sort of conventional

00:55:48.739 --> 00:55:52.039
standards, I think I am getting more attractive.

00:55:52.579 --> 00:55:54.840
But I've never been concerned about being conventionally

00:55:54.840 --> 00:55:56.460
attractive, so I don't really attach a lot of

00:55:56.460 --> 00:56:00.329
value to that. It's just interesting. Yeah. And

00:56:00.329 --> 00:56:04.269
that's good. That is a good and healthy way to

00:56:04.269 --> 00:56:10.989
be. And when we were talking about it right at

00:56:10.989 --> 00:56:13.329
the start, and we were talking about when we

00:56:13.329 --> 00:56:17.070
say bimbo, what do we mean? As you mentioned

00:56:17.070 --> 00:56:19.349
earlier, I'd kind of suggest it. I really like

00:56:19.349 --> 00:56:23.289
the kind of the goth bimbo version of it, which

00:56:23.289 --> 00:56:29.559
is in terms of outfits. similar sorts of styles

00:56:29.559 --> 00:56:32.099
of you know tiny little tops tiny little skirts

00:56:32.099 --> 00:56:34.440
tiny little shorts kind of kind of thing different

00:56:34.440 --> 00:56:37.219
colors yeah you know and then you've got the

00:56:37.219 --> 00:56:39.380
really pastel denbos and then you've got the

00:56:39.380 --> 00:56:47.019
um um really bright pink leopard print kind of

00:56:47.019 --> 00:56:52.119
aesthetic and um we talked about kind of tanning

00:56:52.119 --> 00:56:56.219
and stuff like that none of that was was was

00:56:56.219 --> 00:56:58.760
coming from a place of me saying this is the

00:56:58.760 --> 00:57:01.940
ideal version of you that I want to create, a

00:57:01.940 --> 00:57:03.619
better version of you that I want to create.

00:57:03.699 --> 00:57:05.179
It's like, yeah, we've got loads of options.

00:57:05.239 --> 00:57:07.300
Which one are we going to pick? Yeah. And let's

00:57:07.300 --> 00:57:09.820
just explore that and see if it works. Yeah.

00:57:10.019 --> 00:57:12.960
And that's been really enjoyable to go down that

00:57:12.960 --> 00:57:17.019
bimbo aesthetic that we've gone for. Yeah. It's

00:57:17.019 --> 00:57:19.420
just really hot and really enjoyable. And I remember

00:57:19.420 --> 00:57:21.039
the conversation we had about tanning, where

00:57:21.039 --> 00:57:23.340
we had a different perspective on tan lines.

00:57:23.880 --> 00:57:26.679
Yes. You would prefer not to have tan lines.

00:57:27.179 --> 00:57:29.460
I still do not like tan lines. You would still

00:57:29.460 --> 00:57:33.699
prefer not to have tan lines. But I like how

00:57:33.699 --> 00:57:35.619
that looks. I know you do. And I like how that

00:57:35.619 --> 00:57:38.219
looks on you. And it plays into that slightly

00:57:38.219 --> 00:57:41.500
trashy aesthetic. Yeah. It's a bit like we were

00:57:41.500 --> 00:57:45.219
talking earlier about pubic hair and armpit hair

00:57:45.219 --> 00:57:47.719
and stuff like that. Could have gone either way,

00:57:47.820 --> 00:57:50.699
if I'm honest. Yeah. It's not that I dislike

00:57:50.699 --> 00:57:54.019
having an all -over body tan. I'm like, no, I

00:57:54.019 --> 00:57:58.340
want my bimbo pig. to have tan lines yes so it's

00:57:58.340 --> 00:58:01.380
going to have tan lines yeah and that's hot and

00:58:01.380 --> 00:58:03.239
i you have won me over a little bit of tan lines

00:58:03.239 --> 00:58:05.539
mostly because i see how much you like them also

00:58:05.539 --> 00:58:08.480
it's quite fun seeing seeing that my tan is developing

00:58:08.480 --> 00:58:10.699
because i've always liked tanning i haven't always

00:58:10.699 --> 00:58:12.500
done it consistently and in my last relationship

00:58:12.500 --> 00:58:14.119
one of the appearance control rules we had was

00:58:14.119 --> 00:58:16.260
i was not allowed to tan yeah it made me pale

00:58:16.260 --> 00:58:20.190
um But when I've tanned in the past, I have always

00:58:20.190 --> 00:58:22.730
gone for absolutely no tan lines. I would even

00:58:22.730 --> 00:58:25.690
make sure that I was shifting my position in

00:58:25.690 --> 00:58:28.110
different stages of the tanning in the sunbeds

00:58:28.110 --> 00:58:30.230
to avoid like the crease under my butt and to

00:58:30.230 --> 00:58:31.849
make sure that the insides of my legs were tanned

00:58:31.849 --> 00:58:34.670
as much as the outsides. I was really, really

00:58:34.670 --> 00:58:37.210
like probably a bit neurotic about making sure

00:58:37.210 --> 00:58:40.929
my tan was properly even all over. But because

00:58:40.929 --> 00:58:42.489
of that, I get a little bit of tan blindness

00:58:42.489 --> 00:58:45.590
where I'll look at myself and go. I'm not dark

00:58:45.590 --> 00:58:47.590
enough yet. Or I'm fading, I'm fading, I'm going

00:58:47.590 --> 00:58:49.989
pale, I need to go for a sunbed now. But when

00:58:49.989 --> 00:58:51.269
I've got tan lines, I can look at them and go,

00:58:51.309 --> 00:58:56.210
actually, I am tan. I'm really tan. So yeah,

00:58:56.230 --> 00:59:00.150
there's advantages. And I like it. It looks good.

00:59:00.269 --> 00:59:05.409
You look amazing. And you looked amazing before.

00:59:06.170 --> 00:59:07.809
And that's the point I will keep coming back

00:59:07.809 --> 00:59:10.789
to. And I know I've been doing a joke on this

00:59:10.789 --> 00:59:14.119
episode, kind of disclaimer number three. but

00:59:14.119 --> 00:59:16.960
it's important but it's important to me yeah

00:59:16.960 --> 00:59:20.280
and i think it's important for you as well i

00:59:20.280 --> 00:59:23.500
yeah i think so definitely i think it's hard

00:59:23.500 --> 00:59:25.579
to imagine how i would feel if you said that

00:59:25.579 --> 00:59:28.659
you wanted to to make me hotter to you to kind

00:59:28.659 --> 00:59:31.260
of fix the flaws or change me into a better version

00:59:31.260 --> 00:59:34.059
of me because there's a part of me as a submissive

00:59:34.059 --> 00:59:36.920
and as an emotional masochist who's like that's

00:59:36.920 --> 00:59:39.360
really hot yeah but i also think it would probably

00:59:39.360 --> 00:59:41.300
be something that would actually affect my self

00:59:41.300 --> 00:59:44.190
-esteem It wouldn't just be a little bit of fun

00:59:44.190 --> 00:59:46.750
mental suffering. I would feel not worthy of

00:59:46.750 --> 00:59:48.889
the relationship, which isn't what I want. But

00:59:48.889 --> 00:59:52.550
I like that this is about, it's about using elements

00:59:52.550 --> 00:59:55.010
of appearance to kind of tell a story about what

00:59:55.010 --> 00:59:57.389
my function is in the relationship. It's using

00:59:57.389 --> 00:59:59.389
these things that are stereotypically seen as

00:59:59.389 --> 01:00:03.630
making someone more of a sex object, making someone

01:00:03.630 --> 01:00:06.550
be perceived as trashy. Even kind of moving,

01:00:06.610 --> 01:00:09.099
it's almost moving away from... from the appearance

01:00:09.099 --> 01:00:10.900
of a person these are all things that people

01:00:10.900 --> 01:00:12.579
do to their appearance but it's moving into more

01:00:12.579 --> 01:00:15.300
like a blow -up doll yeah like a caricature one

01:00:15.300 --> 01:00:16.820
of the things we've both been really clear about

01:00:16.820 --> 01:00:18.940
from the start is that we weren't wanting to

01:00:18.940 --> 01:00:20.880
take away anything from my gender identity i'm

01:00:20.880 --> 01:00:23.579
non -binary so although i'm now probably buying

01:00:23.579 --> 01:00:25.380
a slightly higher proportion of my clothes from

01:00:25.380 --> 01:00:27.000
the women's section than i did before i'm also

01:00:27.000 --> 01:00:28.800
doing things with my makeup that are considered

01:00:28.800 --> 01:00:30.739
to be things that women do things in my head

01:00:31.079 --> 01:00:33.119
that women do things like that i've never approached

01:00:33.119 --> 01:00:35.019
this and you've never approached this as trying

01:00:35.019 --> 01:00:37.760
to either turn me into a woman make me present

01:00:37.760 --> 01:00:39.460
as a woman take anything away from my gender

01:00:39.460 --> 01:00:42.500
identity yeah because what we're doing is is

01:00:42.500 --> 01:00:45.820
an exaggerated and caricatured version of some

01:00:45.820 --> 01:00:49.159
elements of femininity that a lot of women don't

01:00:49.159 --> 01:00:51.219
participate in and even the women who do participate

01:00:51.219 --> 01:00:53.159
in are participating in a very different way.

01:00:53.239 --> 01:00:56.139
Yeah. What we're doing feels a little bit more

01:00:56.139 --> 01:00:59.280
like drag. Yeah. Definitely very strongly objectification

01:00:59.280 --> 01:01:01.739
in the quite literal sense of not just look at

01:01:01.739 --> 01:01:03.960
me and objectify me, but no, make me into an

01:01:03.960 --> 01:01:06.579
object. Make me into a fuck doll. Yeah, yeah,

01:01:06.619 --> 01:01:09.000
yeah. And I think that was probably, thinking

01:01:09.000 --> 01:01:11.420
back to that conversation at Time Mouth slash

01:01:11.420 --> 01:01:13.500
Muth, I think that was probably the element of

01:01:13.500 --> 01:01:16.179
that conversation that kind of... sealed it for

01:01:16.179 --> 01:01:19.119
me because i was very concerned about you are

01:01:19.119 --> 01:01:24.300
really very and rightly proud of your gender

01:01:24.300 --> 01:01:27.059
identity and how you have worked really hard

01:01:27.059 --> 01:01:30.460
to figure that stuff out and arrive at a place

01:01:30.460 --> 01:01:32.800
where you're comfortable which is amazing and

01:01:32.800 --> 01:01:34.280
i didn't want to do anything that would undo

01:01:34.280 --> 01:01:36.980
that yeah so i was really worried about that

01:01:36.980 --> 01:01:39.519
kind of feminizing you in a way that would kind

01:01:39.519 --> 01:01:43.280
of cause you discomfort or dysphoria yeah but

01:01:43.280 --> 01:01:45.260
actually it was you explained it to me exactly

01:01:45.260 --> 01:01:48.619
like that it's like a performance it's like drag

01:01:48.619 --> 01:01:52.539
yeah and if we think about it like that then

01:01:52.539 --> 01:01:55.099
that kind of changes it changes our relationship

01:01:55.099 --> 01:01:58.559
to it yeah I think um it was a really helpful

01:01:58.559 --> 01:02:01.440
thing that you you how you explained that to

01:02:01.440 --> 01:02:04.000
me yeah I think in a lot of ways it's actually

01:02:04.000 --> 01:02:07.349
been really helpful for me as well where I think

01:02:07.349 --> 01:02:09.789
it's it's basically impossible to pass as non

01:02:09.789 --> 01:02:12.269
-binary right however heterogeneous you are people

01:02:12.269 --> 01:02:14.909
are sort of raised from birth to put everyone

01:02:14.909 --> 01:02:16.710
so either the male box or the female box and

01:02:16.710 --> 01:02:18.110
they look at you and they try to figure it out

01:02:18.110 --> 01:02:19.969
from the clues they can see and then and then

01:02:19.969 --> 01:02:22.610
they guess and sometimes they're they're somewhat

01:02:22.610 --> 01:02:25.349
close to right sometimes they're not um so I

01:02:25.349 --> 01:02:27.150
haven't ever really been perceived as the gender

01:02:27.150 --> 01:02:31.059
I am and early in my transition i really wanted

01:02:31.059 --> 01:02:33.860
to be perceived as the gender i am and if i couldn't

01:02:33.860 --> 01:02:36.119
be perceived as non -binary i figured like being

01:02:36.119 --> 01:02:38.820
perceived as male would be it felt better because

01:02:38.820 --> 01:02:40.079
at least it was a different place than where

01:02:40.079 --> 01:02:42.539
i'd started yeah um so i tried really really

01:02:42.539 --> 01:02:45.000
hard to pass as male got really really distressed

01:02:45.000 --> 01:02:46.880
if people were reading me as female i tied up

01:02:46.880 --> 01:02:48.820
a lot of my self -worth in other people's perception

01:02:48.820 --> 01:02:51.360
of my gender and a few years into it i kind of

01:02:51.360 --> 01:02:54.550
hit this sort of the fuck it moment thought like

01:02:54.550 --> 01:02:56.949
i have no control over how other people perceive

01:02:56.949 --> 01:02:59.869
me and the you know even trans people who pass

01:02:59.869 --> 01:03:02.530
really reliably will sometimes just get clocked

01:03:02.530 --> 01:03:04.130
over something fucking stupid because different

01:03:04.130 --> 01:03:06.429
people pick up on different things yeah um and

01:03:06.429 --> 01:03:09.170
also not all cis people even pass like my sister

01:03:09.170 --> 01:03:12.510
is a cisgender woman she is also six foot two

01:03:12.510 --> 01:03:17.150
i think um and she has has been misgendered as

01:03:17.150 --> 01:03:19.289
male many many times in her life purely because

01:03:19.289 --> 01:03:23.099
of her height yeah so like if I tie up all of

01:03:23.099 --> 01:03:26.440
my gender identity and my value as a human and

01:03:26.440 --> 01:03:30.519
my sense of like love for myself in whether other

01:03:30.519 --> 01:03:32.400
people are reading my gender correctly and getting

01:03:32.400 --> 01:03:34.699
my pronouns right I am just setting myself up

01:03:34.699 --> 01:03:38.019
for failure so I started to really just kind

01:03:38.019 --> 01:03:40.059
of wear what I want do what I wanted basically

01:03:40.059 --> 01:03:43.880
yeah yeah um but I don't think I fully disconnected

01:03:43.880 --> 01:03:47.880
myself my brain from this idea that identity

01:03:47.880 --> 01:03:49.760
and presentation need to be aligned in some way

01:03:49.760 --> 01:03:51.559
like even if no one's reading it right I still

01:03:51.559 --> 01:03:54.280
have to be telling it right this idea that I

01:03:54.280 --> 01:03:56.420
need to be presenting as non -binary so at least

01:03:56.420 --> 01:03:58.219
the people in the know will know and things like

01:03:58.219 --> 01:04:00.260
that and it's still treating my gender as something

01:04:00.260 --> 01:04:02.380
I'm doing for other people's benefit in that

01:04:02.380 --> 01:04:06.260
headspace getting into bimbofication and starting

01:04:06.260 --> 01:04:08.460
to present a lot more what most people will read

01:04:08.460 --> 01:04:11.079
as feminine has actually allowed me to fully

01:04:11.079 --> 01:04:14.170
disconnect gender identity and presentation from

01:04:14.170 --> 01:04:15.869
each other and feel more secure in my identity

01:04:15.869 --> 01:04:18.130
than i have ever before right because i'm no

01:04:18.130 --> 01:04:21.550
longer doing it for anyone else at all like it's

01:04:21.550 --> 01:04:24.570
literally not perceivable to most people um every

01:04:24.570 --> 01:04:26.469
time i post a tiktok video now one of the suggested

01:04:26.469 --> 01:04:29.670
searches is carizal detransition because everyone

01:04:29.670 --> 01:04:32.030
assumes that's what i've done um and it's like

01:04:32.030 --> 01:04:33.929
you know what they can think that yeah because

01:04:33.929 --> 01:04:35.849
i'm the one who lives in my head and i know exactly

01:04:35.849 --> 01:04:39.829
what my gender is um like it's pretty freeing

01:04:39.829 --> 01:04:41.469
to not be doing it for anyone else's benefit

01:04:41.469 --> 01:04:45.110
anymore yeah yeah it's pretty cool yeah I think

01:04:45.110 --> 01:04:46.349
it's one of the things that you've said to me

01:04:46.349 --> 01:04:52.230
a few times before is um I can I can never get

01:04:52.230 --> 01:04:54.610
it right I will misquote you but essentially

01:04:54.610 --> 01:04:57.010
other people's idea of your gender is none of

01:04:57.010 --> 01:04:59.610
my business yeah but you know when you hear something

01:04:59.610 --> 01:05:01.150
when someone says something to you and you're

01:05:01.150 --> 01:05:03.849
like I need to write that down I need to embroider

01:05:03.849 --> 01:05:06.869
it or cross stitch it or crochet it on everything

01:05:06.869 --> 01:05:11.699
I own as a reminder that actually nobody else's

01:05:11.699 --> 01:05:17.059
opinion matters yeah i think that's um and it's

01:05:17.059 --> 01:05:19.460
really it's really nice to hear that that's the

01:05:19.460 --> 01:05:24.000
stuff we've done for kinky reasons has has affirmed

01:05:24.000 --> 01:05:28.320
that for you yeah um it's because that was genuinely

01:05:28.320 --> 01:05:30.280
something that i really worried about well when

01:05:30.280 --> 01:05:32.900
we started doing this stuff i had no idea to

01:05:32.900 --> 01:05:34.579
be honest how i was gonna feel like when we had

01:05:34.579 --> 01:05:37.650
that conversation i i thought i could predict

01:05:37.650 --> 01:05:39.630
like if we go in this direction it's going to

01:05:39.630 --> 01:05:41.929
feel comfortable if we go in this direction it

01:05:41.929 --> 01:05:45.150
might not so i i the sort of image i kind of

01:05:45.150 --> 01:05:46.889
gave you of what might not be comfortable for

01:05:46.889 --> 01:05:48.989
me was if we went down the more sort of naturally

01:05:48.989 --> 01:05:51.650
feminine route so like yeah a bit mascara clear

01:05:51.650 --> 01:05:55.349
lip gloss um like nice sort of floaty floral

01:05:55.349 --> 01:05:59.050
summer dress and examples yeah not the vibe though

01:05:59.050 --> 01:06:02.199
i do have now a floaty floral summer dress pair

01:06:02.199 --> 01:06:04.099
of sandals and sometimes i'm in a hurry with

01:06:04.099 --> 01:06:06.059
my makeup it pretty much does look like mascara

01:06:06.059 --> 01:06:08.699
lip gloss and now it's fine because we started

01:06:08.699 --> 01:06:10.900
with the sort of hyper feminine over the top

01:06:10.900 --> 01:06:14.119
bright colors really exaggerated stuff i can

01:06:14.119 --> 01:06:15.820
now do a toned down version of that and it still

01:06:15.820 --> 01:06:17.679
feels comfortable but i think if that's where

01:06:17.679 --> 01:06:19.139
we'd started that would have been tricky for

01:06:19.139 --> 01:06:21.900
me yeah yeah yeah but i wasn't really sure how

01:06:21.900 --> 01:06:23.320
it was going to feel until we tried it those

01:06:23.320 --> 01:06:26.300
were my best guesses um and it's turned out better

01:06:26.300 --> 01:06:28.840
than i could have expected yeah yeah and i can

01:06:28.840 --> 01:06:30.639
see why that would be different because that

01:06:30.639 --> 01:06:33.710
that you know cute floral dress, bit of mascara,

01:06:34.190 --> 01:06:37.130
lip gloss kind of thing. That would feel more

01:06:37.130 --> 01:06:40.630
like turning you into a cis woman than it would

01:06:40.630 --> 01:06:46.030
be turning you into a bimbo sex doll. Yeah. But

01:06:46.030 --> 01:06:48.309
no, I'm really pleased at that, that it's turned

01:06:48.309 --> 01:06:50.829
out the way that it has for you. There hasn't

01:06:50.829 --> 01:06:54.449
ever been, I don't think, any of those moments

01:06:54.449 --> 01:06:57.449
of, oh, we're getting this wrong, is it? causing

01:06:57.449 --> 01:07:00.690
psychic damage yeah no it's always felt very

01:07:00.690 --> 01:07:03.269
comfortable i think the the only sort of element

01:07:03.269 --> 01:07:05.369
of that has been is you needing a bit of reassurance

01:07:05.369 --> 01:07:07.210
that that wasn't happening in the early days

01:07:07.210 --> 01:07:09.630
so you needing to check in a lot for your own

01:07:09.630 --> 01:07:11.449
sanity to make sure that i was doing okay and

01:07:11.449 --> 01:07:14.489
i wasn't sort of like repressing feelings of

01:07:14.489 --> 01:07:18.190
dysphoria or discomfort to please you yeah so

01:07:18.190 --> 01:07:20.989
you asked quite a lot and you um when it came

01:07:20.989 --> 01:07:22.610
to like the first time i shaved my legs i suggested

01:07:22.610 --> 01:07:24.789
it and you didn't want to make it a rule until

01:07:24.789 --> 01:07:26.309
i'd done it and lived with it for a few days

01:07:26.309 --> 01:07:27.769
you were like no if you shave your legs and you

01:07:27.769 --> 01:07:29.570
think i actually know this is making me unhappy

01:07:29.570 --> 01:07:31.449
i don't feel like myself without my hairy legs

01:07:31.449 --> 01:07:33.610
i'm not gonna make you keep them yeah but you

01:07:33.610 --> 01:07:35.449
did warn me it's like once you start doing this

01:07:35.449 --> 01:07:37.070
and you commit to doing it i will expect you

01:07:37.070 --> 01:07:38.610
to maintain it you can't be getting around with

01:07:38.610 --> 01:07:43.210
velcro lace yeah yeah yeah which is fair which

01:07:43.210 --> 01:07:47.690
which is fair um but also it's just how our rules

01:07:47.690 --> 01:07:50.860
work yeah isn't it it's it's that's no different

01:07:50.860 --> 01:07:53.159
from any other the other rule that we might add

01:07:53.159 --> 01:07:55.440
to the dozens and dozens of them that we have

01:07:55.440 --> 01:07:57.480
is we try something out and if it doesn't work

01:07:57.480 --> 01:08:00.400
we don't keep doing it but if you if it's in

01:08:00.400 --> 01:08:03.380
the rule you do it yeah because it's in the rules

01:08:03.380 --> 01:08:08.820
yeah which i think is just a sensible way of

01:08:08.820 --> 01:08:10.739
doing it definitely so like you said there was

01:08:10.739 --> 01:08:13.170
some potential risks when it came to feeling

01:08:13.170 --> 01:08:14.690
sort of comfortable and affirmed in my gender

01:08:14.690 --> 01:08:17.729
identity. Another area of risk that we negotiated

01:08:17.729 --> 01:08:20.550
for quite a long time was stuff around body image

01:08:20.550 --> 01:08:22.609
and particularly around weight because we wanted

01:08:22.609 --> 01:08:25.590
to include some elements of like body control

01:08:25.590 --> 01:08:28.409
and body sculpting in what we do. Do you want

01:08:28.409 --> 01:08:30.390
to tell me a little bit about your approach with

01:08:30.390 --> 01:08:32.229
that mix? Yeah, this was another one of those

01:08:32.229 --> 01:08:34.689
areas where I was kind of doing my usual thing

01:08:34.689 --> 01:08:36.970
of thinking at a million miles an hour and worrying

01:08:36.970 --> 01:08:39.229
that I might just destroy you as a person because

01:08:39.229 --> 01:08:40.989
of the unreasonable demands that I was making

01:08:40.989 --> 01:08:45.760
on you. and really conscious of not wanting to

01:08:45.760 --> 01:08:48.600
do anything, that would diminish your sense of

01:08:48.600 --> 01:08:51.159
self -worth and your opinion of yourself. Yeah.

01:08:52.079 --> 01:08:55.260
But what we had talked about in defining the

01:08:55.260 --> 01:08:58.880
bimbo journey for us is that you would work to

01:08:58.880 --> 01:09:02.880
achieve a certain body type. Yeah. So big butt,

01:09:03.020 --> 01:09:07.920
narrow waist, boobs. Yeah. Sort of. Boobs just

01:09:07.920 --> 01:09:10.020
as they are because we have no control. Boobs

01:09:10.020 --> 01:09:14.289
just as they are. Yeah. because i wasn't about

01:09:14.289 --> 01:09:17.430
to make you get implants and probably couldn't

01:09:17.430 --> 01:09:20.010
afford them they're quite expensive i think yeah

01:09:20.010 --> 01:09:21.829
because the deal is we split all of the bimbo

01:09:21.829 --> 01:09:25.149
costs yeah yeah not at the moment but we'd agreed

01:09:25.149 --> 01:09:27.590
that that would be the direction that we were

01:09:27.590 --> 01:09:29.909
going i really like your butt so i wanted your

01:09:29.909 --> 01:09:35.210
butt to be juicy and um and then accentuating

01:09:35.210 --> 01:09:37.970
that with it with a slightly narrower waist and

01:09:37.970 --> 01:09:41.170
that led us to a um i guess kind of firming up

01:09:41.170 --> 01:09:45.000
of the rules around diet and exercise um you

01:09:45.000 --> 01:09:51.619
know we we've negotiated our way to a um a daily

01:09:51.619 --> 01:09:54.920
calorie intake that you have to work within you've

01:09:54.920 --> 01:09:56.539
got a certain amount of exercising that you need

01:09:56.539 --> 01:09:58.520
to do and certain types of exercise to achieve

01:09:58.520 --> 01:10:00.579
what we've agreed we're going to go for yeah

01:10:00.579 --> 01:10:03.220
and i think one of the things that i was really

01:10:03.220 --> 01:10:05.920
clear i have always been really clear about throughout

01:10:05.920 --> 01:10:08.840
that this whole time is that there isn't a time

01:10:08.840 --> 01:10:12.920
limit on that for for achieving that those changes

01:10:12.920 --> 01:10:16.720
in your body yeah um because i know how how that

01:10:16.720 --> 01:10:21.939
works you know unless you're gonna be really

01:10:21.939 --> 01:10:24.159
really strict and really really hard on yourself

01:10:24.159 --> 01:10:26.539
it is actually quite difficult to do that stuff

01:10:26.539 --> 01:10:29.340
quickly yeah especially because it's not just

01:10:29.340 --> 01:10:32.100
weight loss it's i'll need to to achieve that

01:10:32.100 --> 01:10:33.880
goal i'll need to lose some fat and then gain

01:10:33.880 --> 01:10:35.619
some muscle and then probably lose some fat again

01:10:35.619 --> 01:10:37.140
and kind of go through that cycle a few times

01:10:37.140 --> 01:10:40.930
yeah to build the shape yeah and i have a chronic

01:10:40.930 --> 01:10:43.170
illness i'm not as young as i was and i have

01:10:43.170 --> 01:10:45.529
a very busy life so that isn't something that

01:10:45.529 --> 01:10:48.369
i can necessarily just just do the way i maybe

01:10:48.369 --> 01:10:51.210
could have done 10 years ago yeah um but we're

01:10:51.210 --> 01:10:53.609
both enjoying the process of it and i'm getting

01:10:53.609 --> 01:10:55.630
generally fitter and healthier as a result as

01:10:55.630 --> 01:10:58.770
well which is always a win yeah yeah i think

01:10:58.770 --> 01:11:01.890
it's been it's had positive impact and it's moving

01:11:01.890 --> 01:11:04.590
in the right kind of direction it's been interesting

01:11:04.590 --> 01:11:07.600
sometimes where like you will go and weigh yourself

01:11:07.600 --> 01:11:10.619
and you'll feel you'll you'll you'll be a little

01:11:10.619 --> 01:11:14.779
bit disappointed in the yeah in the in the number

01:11:14.779 --> 01:11:16.859
on the scale not being quite as low as you would

01:11:16.859 --> 01:11:19.420
like it to be yeah and it's a weird one because

01:11:19.420 --> 01:11:21.279
i've got better body image than i've had for

01:11:21.279 --> 01:11:25.180
forever basically um it's not ever that i look

01:11:25.180 --> 01:11:27.979
at my body and feel like my body is bad the way

01:11:27.979 --> 01:11:29.779
it is i don't have a lot of insecurity around

01:11:29.779 --> 01:11:31.899
around my weight or anything but if i've set

01:11:31.899 --> 01:11:33.899
myself a goal to achieve something and i'm not

01:11:33.899 --> 01:11:36.989
achieving it yeah that hits me a lot harder so

01:11:36.989 --> 01:11:38.609
it's not that there's a particular number on

01:11:38.609 --> 01:11:40.289
the scale that i'm aiming for or a particular

01:11:40.289 --> 01:11:42.109
amount of weight that i think i should be losing

01:11:42.109 --> 01:11:44.210
each week but if i weigh myself and i haven't

01:11:44.210 --> 01:11:47.750
lost any or i've barely lost any yeah it feels

01:11:47.750 --> 01:11:50.189
like like i should be doing a better job yeah

01:11:50.189 --> 01:11:52.130
not that the body is bad it's that the work i've

01:11:52.130 --> 01:11:55.590
done is bad yeah um so i think that's why it's

01:11:55.590 --> 01:11:57.350
sometimes a little bit more challenging um but

01:11:57.350 --> 01:11:59.670
also like weight fluctuations happen uh sometimes

01:11:59.670 --> 01:12:01.430
i make the mistake of weighing myself right after

01:12:01.430 --> 01:12:03.310
we had a massive takeaway the night before yeah

01:12:03.310 --> 01:12:06.619
um you know these things happen yeah but i'm

01:12:06.619 --> 01:12:10.239
definitely stronger generally fitter yeah sort

01:12:10.239 --> 01:12:12.779
of sleeping better things like that than than

01:12:12.779 --> 01:12:15.300
i was and i think the body changes will continue

01:12:15.300 --> 01:12:18.060
to come it's just i am old and sick and it takes

01:12:18.060 --> 01:12:23.140
time yeah yes yeah and it's it's it's that difference

01:12:23.140 --> 01:12:27.260
for me about the outcome of the process yeah

01:12:27.260 --> 01:12:30.260
i think part of what's really enjoyable about

01:12:30.260 --> 01:12:33.779
the bimbofication stuff that we do is that it's

01:12:33.779 --> 01:12:36.439
about the process and not necessarily just about

01:12:36.439 --> 01:12:40.140
the outcome so if it takes a while to get to

01:12:40.140 --> 01:12:44.199
um that point where you're happy that you've

01:12:44.199 --> 01:12:46.199
achieved what you need to achieve in the rules

01:12:46.199 --> 01:12:49.279
if that takes a while that's fine from my perspective

01:12:49.279 --> 01:12:53.640
yeah because it isn't about wanting a slimmer

01:12:53.640 --> 01:12:57.260
wasted version of carizal it's it's about having

01:12:57.260 --> 01:13:04.220
a bimbo A good thing to have. A good thing to

01:13:04.220 --> 01:13:06.899
have. Everybody should have one. I think, you

01:13:06.899 --> 01:13:09.920
know, life is massively improved by having a

01:13:09.920 --> 01:13:13.359
bimbo pig in your life. Yes. You can keep one

01:13:13.359 --> 01:13:15.199
in your house. You can keep one. I do keep one

01:13:15.199 --> 01:13:18.420
in my house. Yes. I do. Every time we go to a

01:13:18.420 --> 01:13:20.460
zoo, I like to point out all the animals that

01:13:20.460 --> 01:13:22.460
I think you can keep in your house and you dispute

01:13:22.460 --> 01:13:26.159
most of them. Because you can't. I think, apart

01:13:26.159 --> 01:13:28.300
from the really big animals, I think most animals

01:13:28.300 --> 01:13:31.060
could be kept in your house. Because I think

01:13:31.060 --> 01:13:34.100
it could be done. They would physically fit in

01:13:34.100 --> 01:13:37.579
our house. That is not in dispute for some of

01:13:37.579 --> 01:13:39.260
the animals. But we couldn't keep them in our

01:13:39.260 --> 01:13:43.439
house. They would destroy it. Maybe you can train

01:13:43.439 --> 01:13:46.000
them, can teach them to learn. I can't even train

01:13:46.000 --> 01:13:48.020
the cat to lie down on my chest when we're in

01:13:48.020 --> 01:13:52.260
bed. That's true. You are having some difficulty.

01:13:52.340 --> 01:13:56.029
Cookie is very stupid, though. But no, a bimbo

01:13:56.029 --> 01:13:57.930
pig is a creature you can keep in your house.

01:13:57.989 --> 01:14:03.810
Yes, yeah, I would recommend it to anybody. But

01:14:03.810 --> 01:14:06.670
that kind of... that element of the appearance

01:14:06.670 --> 01:14:09.029
control where it is it is talking about physical

01:14:09.029 --> 01:14:11.189
changes to your body and not just the cosmetic

01:14:11.189 --> 01:14:13.569
stuff about kind of lip filler and tanning and

01:14:13.569 --> 01:14:15.689
things like that which are things that are done

01:14:15.689 --> 01:14:18.789
to your body that diet and exercise related stuff

01:14:18.789 --> 01:14:21.010
is really tricky to i think it's really tricky

01:14:21.010 --> 01:14:23.210
to navigate and maybe it's just me overthinking

01:14:23.210 --> 01:14:25.850
it in that way that i do but there is a lot of

01:14:25.850 --> 01:14:28.310
that sort of diet and exercise related stuff

01:14:28.310 --> 01:14:32.399
so changing body shape is can be a really tricky

01:14:32.399 --> 01:14:35.000
thing to navigate and and I probably provide

01:14:35.000 --> 01:14:37.600
more reassurance about it and check in more than

01:14:37.600 --> 01:14:39.960
I need to but that's important to me that's how

01:14:39.960 --> 01:14:42.000
I feel psychologically safe in doing the stuff

01:14:42.000 --> 01:14:45.340
yeah that stuff that's fair and part of the safety

01:14:45.340 --> 01:14:48.470
approach we took to that as well was the amount

01:14:48.470 --> 01:14:51.270
of input you asked for from me on that, because

01:14:51.270 --> 01:14:54.329
I have done a lot of fitness stuff in the past,

01:14:54.430 --> 01:14:56.029
especially when I was younger and healthier,

01:14:56.069 --> 01:14:58.689
I was really into a lot of fitness. I've lost

01:14:58.689 --> 01:15:01.109
a significant amount of weight before a few times.

01:15:01.729 --> 01:15:03.989
So I know what works for my body, what's healthy

01:15:03.989 --> 01:15:05.869
for me, what's achievable and things like that.

01:15:06.090 --> 01:15:08.489
So you have never said, I want your weight to

01:15:08.489 --> 01:15:10.050
be this number. You've never said, I want the

01:15:10.050 --> 01:15:11.729
calorie intake that you have to be this number.

01:15:12.010 --> 01:15:14.050
I want you to do this type of exercise for this

01:15:14.050 --> 01:15:16.010
amount of time on these days in the week. None

01:15:16.010 --> 01:15:17.569
of that. Because I know nothing about it. that

01:15:17.569 --> 01:15:20.789
stuff yeah so what you've done is said if this

01:15:20.789 --> 01:15:22.989
is the goal what do you think you should be doing

01:15:22.989 --> 01:15:25.409
to achieve it and i've said this this and this

01:15:25.409 --> 01:15:27.609
and you've gone okay that's the rule yeah tell

01:15:27.609 --> 01:15:28.970
me if you think the goal needs to be changed

01:15:28.970 --> 01:15:30.869
if it's not working or if something is is not

01:15:30.869 --> 01:15:33.689
feeling right we'll adjust it yeah but i i essentially

01:15:33.689 --> 01:15:36.949
set what it is and you enforce it yeah yeah yeah

01:15:36.949 --> 01:15:38.590
in the same way that we just talked about with

01:15:38.590 --> 01:15:40.710
shaving your legs it's like if it's a rule it's

01:15:40.710 --> 01:15:44.949
a rule yeah but what the rule is is i guess within

01:15:44.949 --> 01:15:47.590
your purview because you're the expert on that

01:15:47.590 --> 01:15:52.590
stuff i would be i would be lost trying to come

01:15:52.590 --> 01:15:55.050
up with a diet and exercise plan that would achieve

01:15:55.050 --> 01:15:59.170
that yeah um i think that works my role is enforcer

01:15:59.170 --> 01:16:03.350
yeah which you struggle with because if it's

01:16:03.350 --> 01:16:05.050
midway through the week and i'm supposed to be

01:16:05.050 --> 01:16:08.189
following my diet plan yeah i'm having a thought

01:16:08.189 --> 01:16:11.640
yeah thought is pizza yes you will generally

01:16:11.640 --> 01:16:14.399
say yes because you want pizza yeah and that

01:16:14.399 --> 01:16:16.260
might be why my progress hasn't been quite as

01:16:16.260 --> 01:16:17.819
fast as it could have been it's easy to be like

01:16:17.819 --> 01:16:19.899
oh i'm 35 and i've got a chronic illness it's

01:16:19.899 --> 01:16:22.140
like yeah but i do like a cheeky midweek kebab

01:16:22.140 --> 01:16:26.140
yeah that could be a factor it could be a factor

01:16:26.140 --> 01:16:31.949
in it as well yeah yeah yeah i like that That's

01:16:31.949 --> 01:16:34.630
OK. You know, with a rule like that, with a thing

01:16:34.630 --> 01:16:37.329
like that, I think that has to be OK. There is

01:16:37.329 --> 01:16:39.010
a risk that it turns into something that is a

01:16:39.010 --> 01:16:41.609
bit more toxic, I suppose. I don't know if it's

01:16:41.609 --> 01:16:43.510
even necessary. I mean, I can understand your

01:16:43.510 --> 01:16:46.689
concern about like saying no to any food feels

01:16:46.689 --> 01:16:49.149
feels bad. But I don't think that would necessarily

01:16:49.149 --> 01:16:50.930
be an issue. I think it's more that it would

01:16:50.930 --> 01:16:53.609
make you probably more miserable than me. If

01:16:53.609 --> 01:16:55.970
I say we have a takeaway and you say no, I'm

01:16:55.970 --> 01:16:57.630
going to be like, oh, OK, I guess I'll go cook.

01:16:58.079 --> 01:16:59.260
Where you're only going to be thinking about

01:16:59.260 --> 01:17:02.039
pizzas and kebabs all night. Yeah, true. Yeah,

01:17:02.079 --> 01:17:03.899
there is an element of that as well. It's just

01:17:03.899 --> 01:17:10.479
that I know you're a pushover. Right. Fine. Oh,

01:17:10.560 --> 01:17:12.800
no, I've fucked myself now. You can deal with

01:17:12.800 --> 01:17:19.579
that if I'm a pushover. Oh, no. The rules allow

01:17:19.579 --> 01:17:23.520
you for one non -tracking day a week. Choose

01:17:23.520 --> 01:17:29.939
wisely. Oh, no. so we've talked about quite a

01:17:29.939 --> 01:17:32.479
lot of aspects of appearance control and bimbofication

01:17:32.479 --> 01:17:34.840
and i think it's been dead interesting but something

01:17:34.840 --> 01:17:37.520
i wanted to ask you before we wrap up is how

01:17:37.520 --> 01:17:39.800
do you pick my outfits in the morning mix is

01:17:39.800 --> 01:17:42.739
it completely random or is there a strategy oh

01:17:42.739 --> 01:17:44.720
it's completely random yeah there is there is

01:17:44.720 --> 01:17:49.640
no science behind it um and i think a lot of

01:17:49.640 --> 01:17:54.380
the time it is whatever comes into my head first

01:17:54.380 --> 01:17:58.180
if i'm being honest yeah i think what i what

01:17:58.180 --> 01:18:01.739
I have been saying for several many months uh

01:18:01.739 --> 01:18:04.739
that I need to do is to have a route through

01:18:04.739 --> 01:18:09.380
your drawers and the wardrobes and remind myself

01:18:09.380 --> 01:18:11.239
of all the stuff that we bought because we bought

01:18:11.239 --> 01:18:14.800
an absolute fuck ton of stuff yeah and I think

01:18:14.800 --> 01:18:18.060
there is some of it that you wear much more frequently

01:18:18.060 --> 01:18:20.300
than others yeah and that's partly because that's

01:18:20.300 --> 01:18:23.119
what I pick yeah you always almost always you'll

01:18:23.119 --> 01:18:25.670
go for either scrunch butt leggings yep or some

01:18:25.670 --> 01:18:28.090
of those, like, sort of stretchy, slightly flared

01:18:28.090 --> 01:18:30.909
pants. Those are your two go -tos. Yeah. The

01:18:30.909 --> 01:18:33.470
bottoms. And then tops. You'll either just say,

01:18:33.550 --> 01:18:36.590
and a little top. Yeah. Or you'll pick, it's

01:18:36.590 --> 01:18:38.250
quite often the yellow top that says Ferrell

01:18:38.250 --> 01:18:41.329
on it. Yeah, yeah. I really like it. Yeah, it's

01:18:41.329 --> 01:18:43.550
a good top. Yeah, yeah. Or the white bimbo one.

01:18:44.029 --> 01:18:46.989
Yeah. Yeah, the bimbo doll one in the back. Yeah,

01:18:47.250 --> 01:18:49.470
yeah. Or if you leave it up to me, I tend to

01:18:49.470 --> 01:18:53.449
put myself in shorts a bit more often, I think.

01:18:54.060 --> 01:18:56.979
yeah um but now that we're getting into the colder

01:18:56.979 --> 01:18:59.439
weather i am i'm leaning more towards a longer

01:18:59.439 --> 01:19:03.460
pant yeah yeah um yeah and i'll often go fair

01:19:03.460 --> 01:19:05.539
i've got these like vest tops with the the poppers

01:19:05.539 --> 01:19:07.420
that unpop basically all the way to the bottom

01:19:07.420 --> 01:19:09.000
of my boobs they're one of my ones that i go

01:19:09.000 --> 01:19:10.800
to a lot because they're a little bit loose over

01:19:10.800 --> 01:19:13.479
my tummy so if i'm wearing lower cut pants i

01:19:13.479 --> 01:19:16.159
don't have the trouble zone going yeah yeah um

01:19:16.649 --> 01:19:18.310
Because that's sometimes the downside of the

01:19:18.310 --> 01:19:20.069
outfits you pick for me. You'll put me in low

01:19:20.069 --> 01:19:22.869
-waisted jeans and a crop top. I have had to

01:19:22.869 --> 01:19:24.989
explain to you the trouble zone. Yes, you have.

01:19:25.090 --> 01:19:26.369
It's like, if you want me in a crop top, I need

01:19:26.369 --> 01:19:30.250
a high waist. Yeah, yeah. We do not display the

01:19:30.250 --> 01:19:35.630
trouble zone. No. And that's valid. But no, then.

01:19:39.329 --> 01:19:43.010
There's no science to it, really. And I think

01:19:43.010 --> 01:19:45.189
that's something I can get back. I recognise

01:19:45.189 --> 01:19:47.680
that I need to... kind of get a little bit better

01:19:47.680 --> 01:19:51.100
at knowing what's in in your wardrobe um but

01:19:51.100 --> 01:19:55.300
also remembering you know the the assumption

01:19:55.300 --> 01:19:58.119
is often the assumption that i make when i think

01:19:58.119 --> 01:20:00.159
about what is a good outfit for this bimbo pig

01:20:00.159 --> 01:20:02.939
today is something skinny or something skimpy

01:20:02.939 --> 01:20:05.340
on the top and the bottom yeah and actually what

01:20:05.340 --> 01:20:07.659
you've one of the things that you reminded me

01:20:07.659 --> 01:20:09.340
or tried to teach me early on in the process

01:20:09.340 --> 01:20:11.500
is actually it doesn't need to be like that like

01:20:11.500 --> 01:20:13.920
you've got a couple of really nice pairs of um

01:20:15.279 --> 01:20:18.539
um like the one one green pair and one pink pair

01:20:18.539 --> 01:20:21.800
of like cargo style pants yeah it's like those

01:20:21.800 --> 01:20:25.180
with a really little top is still giving bimbo

01:20:25.180 --> 01:20:28.399
yeah or like a banky jumper with tiny little

01:20:28.399 --> 01:20:31.659
shorts yeah you if you pick one slutty item of

01:20:31.659 --> 01:20:33.539
clothing and one modest item of clothing often

01:20:33.539 --> 01:20:36.779
the impact is more yeah and it's it's stuff like

01:20:36.779 --> 01:20:39.590
that but um because I am a simple creature who

01:20:39.590 --> 01:20:42.090
basically wears jeans and t -shirt every single

01:20:42.090 --> 01:20:44.170
day of their life, isn't something that sticks

01:20:44.170 --> 01:20:47.210
all that easily in my head. I think there might

01:20:47.210 --> 01:20:49.729
be more science to it if I was more organised

01:20:49.729 --> 01:20:51.689
about it and did it the night before as well,

01:20:51.810 --> 01:20:55.109
because quite often our routine is that we wake

01:20:55.109 --> 01:20:57.409
up, I take the chain off your ankle and you say,

01:20:57.470 --> 01:21:00.329
can I go to the toilet mix? Yes. What would you

01:21:00.329 --> 01:21:03.590
like me to wear today? makes and it's like 7

01:21:03.590 --> 01:21:06.289
30 in the morning yeah i haven't had coffee and

01:21:06.289 --> 01:21:10.210
probably haven't even peed yet it is too early

01:21:10.210 --> 01:21:12.430
that's a really good idea we should start do

01:21:12.430 --> 01:21:14.430
it we'll do it the night before yeah we'll start

01:21:14.430 --> 01:21:16.409
from tonight we'll do it yeah so then i could

01:21:16.409 --> 01:21:18.310
have a look through and maybe make some more

01:21:18.310 --> 01:21:21.270
scientific choices so i just make it out yeah

01:21:21.270 --> 01:21:23.210
i wish there was a system oh yes this is the

01:21:23.210 --> 01:21:26.100
vibe that we're going for What clothes can I

01:21:26.100 --> 01:21:28.840
remember? That's fair. And one of the weird side

01:21:28.840 --> 01:21:32.600
effects of you using appearance control more

01:21:32.600 --> 01:21:34.960
is that I used to steal your clothes a lot more

01:21:34.960 --> 01:21:38.100
often than I get away with now. Yeah. You had

01:21:38.100 --> 01:21:40.260
to raid your jeans, your jumpers, your t -shirts

01:21:40.260 --> 01:21:42.359
all the time. And now, sometimes, to be fair,

01:21:42.399 --> 01:21:43.939
you do sometimes put me in your jeans because

01:21:43.939 --> 01:21:46.399
you own skinny jeans and I do not. Yeah. I get

01:21:46.399 --> 01:21:48.720
the same size. So me in a pair of your skinny

01:21:48.720 --> 01:21:52.300
jeans is a good look. Yeah. Like all aging Generation

01:21:52.300 --> 01:21:56.039
X people, I own skinny jeans. Yeah. and I like

01:21:56.039 --> 01:21:58.000
skinny jeans and I would own skinny jeans but

01:21:58.000 --> 01:22:01.220
I at the time that I met you had recently gained

01:22:01.220 --> 01:22:02.960
some weight and none of my skinny jeans fit anymore

01:22:02.960 --> 01:22:04.760
so I got rid of them and before I could replace

01:22:04.760 --> 01:22:06.960
them you invited me to move in with you and now

01:22:06.960 --> 01:22:09.079
I have access to a wardrobe with about 10 pairs

01:22:09.079 --> 01:22:10.760
of skinny jeans in that all happen to be in my

01:22:10.760 --> 01:22:13.500
size yeah why would why would I buy them why

01:22:13.500 --> 01:22:15.420
would you bother it's just over consumption and

01:22:15.420 --> 01:22:18.479
wastefulness honestly I think I should be recognized

01:22:18.479 --> 01:22:21.420
for Yeah, yeah. My contributions to the planet.

01:22:21.600 --> 01:22:23.939
Offsetting my Temu purchases slightly. Yeah,

01:22:23.939 --> 01:22:27.279
yeah. Wearing someone else's jeans. It's your

01:22:27.279 --> 01:22:30.300
carbon offset. Yeah. Stealing my jeans. It's

01:22:30.300 --> 01:22:33.159
interesting that you talk about stealing my clothes

01:22:33.159 --> 01:22:35.699
because you have unwittingly revealed my entire

01:22:35.699 --> 01:22:38.159
motivation for introducing bimbofication in the

01:22:38.159 --> 01:22:40.020
first place. I just wanted you to stop wearing

01:22:40.020 --> 01:22:43.720
my clothes. It hasn't worked though because I

01:22:43.720 --> 01:22:46.239
have stolen one of your little cropped vests

01:22:46.239 --> 01:22:49.710
and put it in my drawer. Have you? Yes, mix.

01:22:49.869 --> 01:22:51.409
Oh, the little black and white stripey one. Yeah,

01:22:51.409 --> 01:22:53.869
mix. Yeah, yeah. Because every time you tell

01:22:53.869 --> 01:22:55.250
me to wear a little top and I wear that one,

01:22:55.289 --> 01:22:57.430
you're like, oh, yes. You're like, why have you

01:22:57.430 --> 01:22:58.710
stolen my clothes again? And then you're like,

01:22:58.810 --> 01:23:01.109
but it's hot though. Yeah, it looks good. Yeah,

01:23:01.149 --> 01:23:04.090
yeah. And to be fair, I did that whenever you

01:23:04.090 --> 01:23:08.029
wore my jeans as well. Yeah. I would walk into

01:23:08.029 --> 01:23:09.630
the kitchen and you'd be wearing my jeans and

01:23:09.630 --> 01:23:11.430
I'd go, why are you stealing all of my clothes?

01:23:11.550 --> 01:23:14.449
And then you would just turn around and I would

01:23:14.449 --> 01:23:17.250
see your butt. And I'd be like, as you were.

01:23:19.840 --> 01:23:21.920
See, sometimes it's nice to give me choices.

01:23:22.140 --> 01:23:24.180
Yeah, yeah. But not too often. Not too often.

01:23:26.060 --> 01:23:30.840
No. But that little vest is one of many items

01:23:30.840 --> 01:23:32.779
of clothes that I have purchased and never felt

01:23:32.779 --> 01:23:34.619
brave enough to wear. So somebody should wear

01:23:34.619 --> 01:23:36.720
it. Well, now you've told me that, I'm going

01:23:36.720 --> 01:23:39.539
to bully you into wearing it. We should do an

01:23:39.539 --> 01:23:41.020
opposite week where I pick all your outfits.

01:23:42.699 --> 01:23:48.619
Dear me. Big hoodie, no pants. For office day.

01:23:52.800 --> 01:24:22.380
And on that bombshell... Goodbye. Goodbye. See

01:24:22.380 --> 01:24:23.539
you next time.