Come in. Welcome. I'm E .G. Marshall. Welcome
to the world of terrifying imagination. The fear
you can hear. This is the story of a natural
born loser. Within the quietest and most retiring
of the genus Homo sapiens, there lurks a tiger.
As indeed, it lurks in all of us. It takes only
the right combination of intolerable pressures,
unfulfilled dreams, and the opportunity to escape
the first and realize the second, to make even
the worm turn. Which is just what happened to
Henry Green. I do a lot of dreaming. When you're
married to someone like Florence, you gotta do
something. But I never figured any of those dreams
to come true. Revenge dreams, you know, like...
It is the decision of this court that you, Florence
Green, be removed to a suitable place and hanged
by the neck until you are dead. Maybe it's hung.
I never remember, like... It's all right, Dr.
Willoughby. I know you did your best to pull
her through, but it's God's will that prevails
in the end. Florence is gone forever. Someone
yacks at you like Florence and steps on your
toes everything you want to do and has to be
on you every moment and won't let you out of
the house alone. I'm telling you, it's simply
murder. So I dream a lot about my wife just not
being. But I never thought of actually causing
her not to be. I never really meant to end up
a murderer. Our mystery drama, It's Simply Murder,
was written especially for the Mystery Theatre
by Ian Martin and stars Jack Guilford. I'll be
back shortly with Act One. One of the simplest
and most fiendish devices to drive men mad is
the Chinese water torture. The slow drip of water
second by second, minute by minute, hour by hour
on the forehead. Unending, inescapable, inexorable.
Henry Green's life was like that, both in his
work and... Did you wash up all your breakfast
dishes? Yes, Florence. You let the spoons up
so they drain? Yes. Put out the garbage? Yes.
And you cleaned out the sink? Yes, Florence.
You wrung out the sponge? Yes. Look, I just...
Don't you move until I'm finished talking to
you. Now, look, I want you right straight home
here after the bank closes tonight. Well, some
of the boys... Oh, don't give me any, uh, some
of the boys... But just a drink to say bon voyage.
Look, you'll have all the bon voyage on the cruise
when we leave tomorrow. Although don't think
there'll be any drinking going on there, either.
There's enough money being spent on this vacation
now. It's the first real vacation we've taken
since our honeymoon. And we wouldn't be having
it if I hadn't made you save for it. I didn't
start saving the money for the cruise. I know,
I know. You wanted to save it for a smelly, dangerous,
noisy old motorcycle. Well, I wasn't having any
of that. I... I always wanted one. All my life...
Oh, stop it. You're too old for one now anyway.
How do you know what? I said, now do you know
that I've got to leave or I'll be late for the
bank? Well, don't forget to pick up the suitcase.
What suitcase? Your old one that Travers' luggage
is repairing. Oh, all right. And mine to come
right home at. Watch out for the cat! Ouch! You
clumsy fool, you stepped on him. I didn't. He
tried to run out of the door and he bit me. Serves
you right. He knows you don't like him. Once
I left the house I always tried to put Florence
out of my mind. And the best way to do that was
to think about Sherry Woods. Not that I could
do any more than think about her because she
was Mr. Mercer's day and night, if you know what
I mean. But more and more I guess I was getting
to the dangerous age because I sure did a lot
of thinking about Sherry. Well, that's 10 20
30 35 40 45 and 1 2 3 4 5 mix 50. Thank you.
Mr. Robinson. See you next week You haven't any
more customers Henry Close your window. Why Sherry?
Mr. Mercer wants to see me. I want to see you
Meet me in the conference room. Of course if
you say so, but what's wrong everything as far
as we're concerned. Unless maybe we have the
nerve to try to put it right. Anyway, it's something
we can't talk over here. Meet me where I said.
What kept you so long? Mr. Mercy, he stopped
me. You still think I'm attractive? Well, Sherry,
knowing how I felt... For you all this time,
you have to ask? Yeah, I want to be quite sure.
Come here, Henry. Where? Here. Right close against
me. Put your arms around me. Suppose someone
should come in? I slipped the automatic lock
on the door before you came in. We're quite safe.
I don't feel that way. I meant from being interrupted.
Now kiss me. Sherry. I'm a married man. Oh, don't
tell me you don't want to. Sherry, you could
make me do anything, but... Make me do anything.
All right, all right, that's enough. I never
kissed anyone like this. It's a good thing you'd
be arrested. It'd be worth it. Let's do it again.
Well, we could do it forever. If you wanted to.
But I'm married. We could make a few changes
Henry when you get back from your trip, are you
still expected to be promoted? Well, I Mr. Mercer
has practically promised me forget Simon's promises.
I don't know how little they're worth We my darling
are out My darling, did you hear the other part?
What do you mean? We're out, you know in your
heart. You'll never be vice president And I've
been fired. He can't do that to you. Well, he
already has. You mean, Mr. Mercer has, uh, uh,
changed his affections? I mean, that lousy, pot
-bellied little two -timer has gone right off
the deep end from his fancy pants. Gosh, Sherry,
I am sorry. If there's anything I can do... Henry,
love, there's plenty you can do to help. You
and me are gonna be rich together. You'd like
that, wouldn't you? Look, I... I better get back
to my cage. Is that where you think you belong?
Well, I am head teller and... In a cage? Oh,
you're a man, not a mouse. Now's the time for
you to prove it. Grab the world by the tail.
How'd you like to travel the world, live like
royalty, never have to punch a timecock, get
away from handling other people's money, have
it be your own? Both of us. Just you and me.
Us? But the cherry? I mean, even if there was
in Florence, I don't have any money. She's got
it all. Oh, then that settles it. I'm going to
remake your life. How? Well... Why don't we have
lunch together, and I'll tell you? Where? The
sandwich shop? No. Let's make it the gourmet.
At 12 .30? But that's terribly expensive. Oh,
Henry, love, that's the way you and me are going
from here on in. If you go along with me. You
know, I want to, but... but how? I'll tell you
that. After the second martini. I don't think
I've ever had two martinis in a row. Certainly
not in the middle of the day. Well, that's no
trouble with you, Henry. You haven't really lived.
That's because I haven't wanted to. Well, if
you really want, you gotta take. I guess we both
learned that today. We sure did. The boat sailed
for both of us. Yeah, well, there's another boat
sailing tomorrow that I'm more interested in.
It's the one I wish... I was taking with you.
But what could I do with Florence? Yeah, well,
that's what we're going to discuss. We are? The
best way to get rid of your wife. It's what we
both want, isn't it? Florence would never give
me a divorce. And even if she did, she'd want
a big alimony. I just couldn't afford you, Sherry.
Well, I won't deny I'm expensive. But you could
easily afford me. How? Sy Mercer and his new
lady love are leaving early for a weekend in
Bermuda. Monday's a holiday. They won't be back
till Tuesday morning. It won't be till then that
they discover the money is missing. What money?
The money in the teller's drawers. How much do
you think it adds up to? Well, it's the end of
the month. Payday for most people. The deposits
have been heavy, somewhere between six or seven
hundred thousand... Why? What do you want to
know? I just wanted to know how much we're gonna
steal. Alright, dear, no one's listening to us.
I'm not listening to you. You must be mad. Steal
it for what? For us to enjoy the rest of our
life together. Together? What about Florence?
Yeah. What about Florence? I just can't wish
her dead, you know. Well, I don't see why not.
You... you mean... killer? How many times have
you wanted to? Almost every day of... But that's
different. I would never do anything about it.
Not even for me? It isn't that. I... I wouldn't
know how. Anyway, it's all impossible. Why? It
takes two keys to close and open the teller's
vault. Mine and Mr. Mercer's. Oh, you mean this
one? How did you? Well, I told you he was leaving
early. He gave me his key to close the vault
tonight with Mr. Shaffer. But Shaffer doesn't
have the other key. I have. Yeah. But I think
Shaffer's gonna have it because he's instructed
me to tell you to give it to Shaffer and tell
him we'd be locking up while you're gone. So
we have full access to the money? Until the outer
door is closed with the time lock. And then the
vault can't be opened until Tuesday. But I'd
be trapped on the ship out at sea and then I...
Henry, after you've taken the money, you'll never
get on that ship. I've always wanted to take
a cruise and Florence wouldn't... There isn't
going to be any Florence, Henry. Remember? But
where could we hide? With enough money, you can
hide anywhere. You can shave off your mustache,
get contacts instead of those wire -rimmed glasses
or a mod wig. I'd cut my hair short, dye it blonde
and get a nose bob and put on a little weight
in the... Right places, we'd be new people. Mmm,
I always wanted to have a beard. So all right,
grow a beard. Flores would never let me. Listen,
Florence won't be around to object. Would I really
have to... to kill her? What other way around
is there? None. The trouble is, I wouldn't know
how. Well, I've thought of that, Henry. Here.
What is it? It's a bottle of sleeping pills.
Just dissolve them in a nice hot cup of tea for
Florence. What more do you want? I... I think
I'll have another martini. I couldn't believe
it was me sitting in an expensive restaurant
drinking in the middle of the day and planning
to murder my wife. Then I started in to think
about the 20 years I'd already had with Florence
and the 20 or more I still might have to spend
with her and Killing Florence began to make sense
Maybe I stole a look at Sherry who was powdering
a nose It looked pretty good to me like it was
and I I didn't see where she didn't have enough
and all the right places to start with That's
when I made up my mind Florence had to go. Henry
Green, 5 '9", 148 pounds, mouse haired, mild,
45 years old, and safely mounted on a treadmill,
running day by day to stand in the same place.
A man in a cage, both at work and at home, but
now in the grip. of the mating urge at Tiger.
I'll be back shortly with Act Two. There's one
thing you can say for Henry Green. Once set loose,
there's nothing small about his new way of life.
Within one day, he is all set to break three
of the major commandments. The sixth, seventh,
and eighth. Although not necessarily in that
order. Murder and adultery will have to wait
their turn. At the moment, he is occupied with
the eighth. And grand larceny at that. All right,
Sherry. That was the last teller. Is she gone?
Yeah. All right. Let's open up. There. That's
mine. Now yours. That does it. Now get the suitcase
from behind the desk while I open the vault.
Here it is, Henry. Put it flat on the floor and
open it. You hand me the money and I'll pack
it in. Hope there's enough room for all of it.
Take the big bills and leave the chicken feed.
No, better take everything. Empty drawers are
easier to handle. What is it? Somebody's coming.
Hide the suitcase. Get the full door! Give me
the bag. Oh, well, all closed up. Miss Woods,
time to go. Why, Miss Burpee? Forget something?
Oh, and Mr. Green, honest, I'm just so embarrassed.
I sure hate to ask you, but... But what? Well,
there's something I want to check in my teller's
drawer. Would you please open up the vault? What?
Yeah, but we just closed up. We can't. Oh, you
gotta. I have to know if it's missing. Is what
missing? My engagement ring. You see, I usually
take it off and put it in the drawer till I go
home, and tonight I forgot to take it out. Well,
can it wait till Monday? Oh, we're all... Well,
Tuesday. No, no, I got dates with Horace over
the weekend, and you'd have a fit if I wasn't
wearing it. Besides, I've got to be sure if it
is there. Uh -huh, well, maybe you put it in
your handbag. Oh, no, no, I looked there first
thing because, oh, now I remember. Yeah, yeah,
right here in my jacket pocket. Oh, gee, I'm
sorry. Whoa, whoa, whoa, that's all right. Well,
I guess I'll be getting along home. I was having
the handle fix before I packed it to go on my
vacation. Oh, gosh, you don't have to explain
to me. I didn't think you were robbing the bank
or nothing. Well, I gotta run. One of the other
girls is waiting for me. Just let me make sure
she's gone, and for God's sakes, let's pack.
We were both shaking like we had a fever after
that run -in with bird brain burpee, but somehow
we managed to pack the money in the bag and close
the outside door with a time lock. Going home
in the cab, the tension was so bad, I was tempted
to take one of the sleeping pills myself to calm
me down, but I resisted that. One crime leads
to another. I was committed. If I lost my wits
now, I stood to lose everything. Well, it's about
time you got home. I had to close up the bank.
At least I see you remember to bring the suitcase.
I'll take that. No, I mean I'll do my own packing.
You? You can't even fold a bath towel. Well,
this time I'll show you. I want you to get a
little rest, dear. I'll take care of myself.
Oh, I'm not gonna argue. Go ahead. Throw everything
in. Higgledy -piggledy. You've been drinking.
Well, I... Just a sort of party, because... I
hope you didn't get too giddy so you can't manage
to take your dinner out of the oven. Where are
you going? Over to Mama's to leave Pussy. She's
gonna take care of him till we get back. Oh.
Okay. Will you be long? I don't know. Why? I'm
all packed. I have no problems. I just thought
you might be tired, Florence dear, and I want
to get to bed early. I'm not even thinking about
bed, and you'd better not either. We got a lot
to do before tomorrow. Don't I know it, Florence.
Don't you worry. I'll be awake. Hello? Sherry?
What's happened? Oh, nothing yet. I just had
dinner. You mean to tell me you haven't gotten
rid of Florence? Oh, yes. How? Well, she just
took the cat over to leave at her mother's. Oh,
you know that isn't what I meant. I know, it's
just, I'm, Sherry, I don't know. Chocolate, but...
No buts, Henry. You can do it. Just put your
mind to it and finish it. I'm just sorry I ever
started it. Oh, Henry. When you know you're gonna
end up with me... Oh, okay, Sherry. You can trust
me. It took a couple of shots from the Christmas
brandy bottle Florence kept... in among her foundation
garments to keep me going till Florence got back
from her mother's. Luckily, by that time, she
seemed tired herself and we were finally ready
for bed. Did you lock the front door and put
out the lights? Florence, how'd you like a nice
cup of cocoa before you go to bed? Put you right
off the sleeve. I'd love it. I'll get it for
you. You can. I used up the last yesterday. But
you gotta, you, I mean, wouldn't you like something
to drink? Well, I did get a little bit of a chill
coming home. I'll take some hot tea. Oh yes,
yes. Hot tea will be just right. Here's your
tea, Florence. Now drink it up. In a minute,
when I have my hair up. Meanwhile, I have a list
of things for you to do. Me? Yes. I want you
to put out the garbage. Check all the outside
door locks. Bleed the hot water tank and make
sure there's no rust. Oil the garage doors. Replace
that burned -out bulb on the basement stairs.
Well, here, here. It's all listed. But this'll
take hours. Just do as I say. Okay. Most of this
wait till we get back? No. Why not? I'll tell
you when you're finished. Now on you go. Oh,
don't look so pouty. It's something to keep you
busy till I'm ready to go to sleep. Yeah. Okay,
Florence. Good idea. Something to keep me busy
till... Goodbye, Florence. What did you say?
Nothing. Just goodbye. Florence? What is it?
Oh my God. What is it, Henry? Nothing. I just
thought you were asleep. No, I just can't relax
somehow. Too many things on my mind. What was
it you were going to tell me? Oh, that can wait.
I wish I could sleep. Didn't wasn't the tea any
help? Oh, that. I poured it out. You forgot the
sugar. Poured it out? I yelled and yelled for
you, but you didn't answer. I must have been
outside. Anyway, it tasted terrible and it was
cold, so I just poured it down the sink. Well,
how'd you like to bring me another, but with
sugar? It's too late. Why? It's only just after
10 o 'clock. Yes, I guess. Oh, I'm so tired.
Okay, Florence, I'll get you another cup. Yes.
Now, what do I do? There's gotta be a way. Oh,
tell me. I haven't got a gun. I wouldn't know
how to use a knife. We haven't got a rope in
the house. There isn't even any string. And I
haven't got the courage to even consider a blunt
weapon. Oh, why did I ever get into this? Look,
if you had a razor, couldn't you? A razor? I
don't even use a safety razor because blood makes
me malicious. Just electric. That's it. Electricity.
Take out a fuse and... I wouldn't go near the
fuse box. I'd probably electrocute myself. Gas.
Have you got a gas stove? Oh, great. All I have
to do is say, Florence... I just robbed the bank
because I'm in love with Sherry Woods and we
need you out of the way, so would you please
just stick your head in the unlighted oven so
I can smother you? What's that? The tea kettle.
Blowing the whistle on me. I guess it's only
the first. Wait a minute! Smother! A pillow!
Oh, Henry, that's it! A pillow! A what? You know,
like Laurence Olivier in that picture where he
had the... Oh, the black face, and he held a
pillow over his wife's face, and then, oh, it
was by Shakespeare. Oh, fellow. Yeah, yeah. I
might just be able to manage that. The tea was
too weak, but at least it had sugar. Henry, what
are you doing standing there with that pillow?
Oh, nothing. Just waiting to come to bed. Turn
out the light for heaven's sake. I'm almost asleep
Henry. Yeah, sure Henry, what are you doing with
the pillow? Come on. It's late. What's Who's
that? I don't know turn on the lights so I can
answer it I don't know what's wrong with you.
You had that pillow right over my face. Hello.
Oh Mama, yeah, what's the matter? Oh, just a
minute. Henry. Will you get that pillow out of
the way so I can talk to my mother? Yeah. Oh,
yeah mama. Yeah Pussy wouldn't take his milk.
Well, I can't understand. Oh, Mama, I forgot
to tell you, put a teaspoon of sugar in it. Yeah.
Yeah, I mean, he's used to it. Oh, no. No, Mama,
you're not interrupting anything. I got all the
time in the world. Hmm? Oh, well, yes, he doesn't
like his litter basket in the bathroom. They're
listening to the voice, droning on and on, the
pillow in my hands, waiting for the moment, the
moment that never came. Three martinis, two brandies
caught up with me, and the next thing I knew...
You fell asleep. Sherry, I was bushed. I was
just knocked out. And when Florence starts talking
to her mother, you just don't know. Oh, never
mind that now, Henry. What are we gonna do? I
don't know. Is Florence still in bed? No. She
got up before me. She's in the bathroom. Oh,
I tell you, Henry, I don't know what to say.
I've been up all night, half out of my mind,
waiting to hear. Hold it. Henry, where are you?
What is it? It's Florence. She's yelling for
me. I'll have to call you back. Henry! Okay,
Florence. I'm coming. Henry! my lungs out and
be dying, and I couldn't get you to help. I'm
here, Florence. What is it? Open the door and
come in. Come right over here to the end of the
bathtub. What's wrong? I have this terrible cramp
in my foot. It's killing me. Massage it quick,
please. Like that? Not the left when you pull
the right. That's it. Grab it and rub. Be careful,
idiot. Don't pull it towards you. You almost
had my head underwater. You want to drown me?
After all the trial and error, the hedging and
the fudging, there it was. All I had to do was
grab both feet, pull and lift up, and Florence
was helpless and gone. Murder could never be
made more simple. Does Henry have the courage
to go through with it? And if he does, can Sherry
and he get away with larceny and murder? And
having broken the sixth and eighth commandments,
will the seventh be worth it all? Those are questions
to be answered shortly when I return with Act
3. I don't suppose you'd ever want to try it,
but in case you do, if your bathtub has an open
end, coax any obliging friend to lie in it, seize
him or her by the ankles, repeat Henry's actions,
and they are helpless, even if they are not obliging
and no matter how strong they are. If there's
water in the tub, of course, they would drown.
That would be surely up to you as it is this
moment up to Henry How long I stood there frozen
unable to move scarcely able to breathe After
I took the action. I'll never know I Suppose
Florence must have thrashed and twisted There
must have been a sound of choking and bubbling
has our head stayed beneath the water I'll never
know I don't remember. All I do remember is what
brought me out of my trance. Who's that? Doorbell.
Who? Must be Sherry. Yeah, Sherry. Got hands.
Hey there. Are you Mr. Green? Why, yes, I am.
Sal Basso here. Okay to move on in? I beg your
pardon? Well, didn't the missus tell you about
me? Why, I don't, uh, who... I'm your new tenant.
Short term, you know? Just while you're off on
a cruise. And that's my family out there in a
wagon. My wife rented you our house? Yeah. For
the three weeks till our house is being painted.
Just got the painting started today. Hey, wait
a minute. Nothing wrong, huh? I mean, I paid
in advance. Mr. Bosso. Basso. Yes, Basso. You're
sure that... Well, just let me talk to your wife
a minute. We can get it all straight now. There's
no need for that. It's just that... Well, I wouldn't
want to have to kick up no fuss, you know? I
mean, I got the painter started. My whole family
and clothes moved out. I mean, I wouldn't want
to drag no lawyer or like that into this, but...
Oh, no, no, there's no question of that. I'm
sure if my wife... As a matter of fact, I do
recall she said she had something to tell me.
You see, I got the receipt right here. That the
Mrs. Handwriting? That, uh... Yes, that's...
Florence's handwriting all right. It's just we've
been a little delayed in getting out of the house
and if you could give me a couple of hours. Oh
sure, I am a bit early. Hey, I'll tell you what.
There's a horror film in the shopping center
movie house. Now I'll take the family there and
give them a thrill and come back in say a couple
hours, okay? and tell the missus to have a good
time on that cruise. And she shouldn't fall overboard
or get drowned or nothing like that. Hello? Henry?
Oh, I thought you'd never call. Listen, baby,
I'm all packed. I'll hop in a cab and come to
your house. You better be ready with the bags
and money and we'll leave for the airport in
the first plane. Why? Why not? She what? Granted,
the house. Well, so what's the difference? All
right, Henry. All right, all right. Don't get
excited yet. Not on the phone. I'll be right
over. I won't. We'll figure out something. After
I hung up the phone, I went upstairs. There was
something I had to do for Florence before Sherry
got there. She was heavier than I thought and
it took me some time to dry her and get her dressed.
It helped since she had all her traveling clothes
lying on the bed. By the time I had her propped
up in the slipper chair, I was soaking wet and
shaking all over. By that time I knew what I
had to do. I opened the door to the basement,
turned on the light and went downstairs. Over
in the back corner was what I was looking for.
An old wardrobe trunk that used to belong to
Florence's father. It was covered with dust and
mildew, but I wiped it off with a rag and dragged
it across the cellar and up the steps. I can't.
She's so heavy. Just a few steps more. That's
it. Now we can get her in the trunk. I still
think... We should have cut and run. Easy now.
Get her so she's sitting on the stool inside.
We wouldn't have had time to get away. The basso's
six or seven kids, they'd have been all over
this house. No way to hide, Florence. That's
it. Now, to get it closed. Hallows, you push.
There. Henry, are you sorry? I... I don't know.
I'm numb. I'll try to make up to you for it.
I did it for you. The crazy things a man can
do. Well, at least you're free. No, no, no, not
yet. Florence may be dead, but we still haven't
gotten rid of her. Oh, I wish. Yeah, yeah, so
do I. Just look at me. I'm an absolute frump.
Well, Florence was a bit bigger than you. A bit?
If I had a twin, she'd fit in here too. I can't
go out like this. This will cover you up. What
is it? A raincoat. We're in luck. It started
to rain. You can pull the hood over your head
and you look just like Florence. Thanks a lot.
Do we have to go through all this, Henry? The
neighbors might be looking out and someone has
got to get on that boat with me. They've got
to think that Florence came aboard so she can
fall overboard tonight. Uh -huh, and then I sneak
off in my own clothes before the ship sails.
I wish I could have you with me, but I can't.
Oh, that's all right, Henry. I'll try to bear
up. There were just too many other things to
think of just then. The first getting a cab,
the second getting it loaded, and the way before
Mr. Basso and his family returned from the horror
movie. I envied him. He was just watching one.
I was living it. Okay, Mark. All righty. Lifting.
Easy, easy. Try to keep our upright. They are
the trunk. Oh, it's a dip. You got a body in
there? A what? I'm just giving you a rib. Feels
heavy enough for one. That suit you? Yeah, sure,
yes, yes, yes, fine, fine. Ah, you know, you
gotta be some kind of a nut to think you gotta
get some old trunk like that on any of today's
camps. Them trucks went out with Jimmy Walker.
I'm just lucky you were nice enough to help out.
For fifty green ones, Mac, remember? Oh, oh,
sure. Here. Okay, climbing. I -I -I just have
to make sure my wife will follow in the taxi.
Well, I'm sorry, ain't got no room in the truck
for three. I'll be right back. I ain't going
nowhere without you. We're all set, Sherry. You
trail us to the pier. Here, I'll take the suitcase.
It's all right. Might as well leave it with me.
Goodbye, Henry. Well, goodbye for now, anyway.
Jouncing along in that miserable little pickup
truck, that last goodbye seemed somehow so final.
could Sherry possibly... I put that out of my
mind. I told myself that everything was working
out for the best. Just a few more hours and we'd
be home free. What's the holdup? It's H .B. This
is the line for the pier. Hey, you want I should
go find out where it's jammed up? Nothing moving?
No, I... Hey, wait a minute. Here's a cop coming
along your side. Officer? Officer? All right!
I'm trying to make a cruise ship that's sailing
in about a half hour. That's fine, citizen. Then
you're right where you belong. Just stay in line.
But why? What's wrong? Nothing for you to worry
about, I'm sure. Just some nut phoned in a bomb
scare. Now, we got to search all baggage going
aboard. You want to really help out? You can.
Open up that trunk you got so the bomb squad
can check you out. But I can open that trunk.
My wife has the keys. Okay, so where's your wife?
She's in a taxi right behind there. Washroom
for her. What taxi? I'll be a son of a gun. That
one just pulled out making a U -turn. Stop her!
Stop her! Hold it, mister. What's going on here?
Hey, Representative Trump, officer. I should
have known he was off his trolley right from
the beginning. No, no, no! Take it easy, mister.
You ain't going nowhere. There's a bomb in that
trunk! A bomb? Yeah, there isn't any bomb! Let
me go! Sherry! Sherry! Sherry! Sherry! Sherry!
Henry! Henry, wake up! What? Where? Florence!
Where am I? Oh, I'm not surprised. You don't
know. stumbling in drunk last night and waking
up the first day of your vacation still calling
for a drink. A drink? Well, you're not getting
any. I hope you have a hangover big enough to
make yourself properly ashamed of. Now, you get
up out of bed and pull yourself together. Oh,
yes, Florence. Oh, my head. Oh, ouch. What's
that? Your suitcase. Right where you insisted
on putting it last night, right next to the bed.
You didn't open it? I did after you fell in the
door with it when you brought it home, and I
packed it for you. Now, you be on your feet and
ready to go by the time I'm out of my bath. My
mind was reeling and splitting in two at the
same time. I kneeled on the floor and opened
the suitcase. It contained nothing but clothes.
No money, just clothes. With a shaking hand,
one ear on the rushing bathwater, and an eye
on the bathroom door, I dialed Sherry's number.
Yes? Sherry? Who is this? Henry. Henry who? Henry
Green. Oh, hello Mr. Green. I was going to call
you a little later. I should think so. What happened
yesterday? Oh, I wouldn't worry too much about
anything. You were kind of cute, really, when
you left the party a bit wobbly. Party? What
party? Well, the party that sat. I mean, Mr.
Mercer gave when you were named Vice President.
I was named Vice President? You don't remember
much, do you? You even went off with the vault
key you were supposed to give to Mr. Shafer.
I have to arrange for you to get it to him today
before you leave on the cruise. Sherry. I mean,
Miss Woods, did we have lunch together yesterday?
Why, no. I didn't have three martinis with you?
Well, not at lunch, at the party. Well, I don't
know how many you had, but you were pretty looped.
I called you home last night and your wife said
you'd gone straight to bed without any dinner.
So, it was all a dream. What did you say? Nothing,
Sherry. I just wish I'd been able to kiss you
goodbye. I sit here hunched like a mouse, remembering
the dream and facing the reality, and I wonder
which is the real nightmare. I suppose I should
be grateful it was only a dream, but on the other
hand... Henry! paper tiger as it turns out. Grand
larcener, first degree murderer, rapacious adulterer,
thirsting after a young woman's flesh, but all
and only in the mind. And surely to have to go
on living with someone like Florence is punishment
enough to fit the crime. I'll be back shortly.
The wish is father to the thought. The thought
is father to the deed. Henry Green only got two
-thirds of the way along that path. Even in dreams,
he never managed to break the Seventh Commandment.
Poor Henry. But as I said in the beginning, this
was the story of a natural -born loser. Our cast
included Jack Guilford, Marion Haley, Bryna Rayburn,
Dan Ockel, Ian Martin. The entire production
was under the direction of Hyman Brown. This
is E .G. Marshall inviting you to return to our
mystery theater for another adventure in the
macabre. Until next time, pleasant dreams. you