Come in. Welcome. I am E .G. Marshall. Welcome
to the sound of suspense. The voices of victims.
The fear you can hear. For the next 52 minutes,
we're going to take you into the world of mystery
and murder. But mostly, into the world of terrifying
imagination. The story you're about to hear might
be called a morality play. It's a story which
has a question you can ask yourself. What is
your price tag for killing a man? If you think
you don't have one, listen to the story of Walter
Van Haas and the Chinaman Button. Mr. Van Haas,
I'm making this as easy for you as pushing a
button. Now if you give your approval my agents
in Johannesburg will be contacted within hours
the rest will be handled simply and with dispatch
My god, I really think you mean it. I Really
think you'd commit murder Our mystery drama,
The Chinaman Button, was written especially for
the Radio Mystery Theatre by Henry Slesser and
stars Paul Hecht. I'll be back shortly with Act
One. And now, Act One of The Chinaman Button.
But it does not begin in China. It begins in
New York City on the executive floor of a bustling
advertising agency. My partner getting yet or
is he goofing off? Oh, no, mr. Michaels is in
his office. He's been there since 8 o 'clock
Don't give me that. I'll bet Lou hasn't been
in the office before 10 since I went on vacation
Well, what do you know? There you are. Just like
Susan said Hello Phil. Welcome back. How do I
look fat and sassy three weeks in Hawaii luau
every night plenty of rum and pineapple I forgot
I gained ten pounds. Well, it looks good on you
Phil. No kidding. What is this? What's the matter
with you? I'm nice and brown, you're white as
a sheet, you look terrible. Lou, are you sick
or something? No, I'm okay, I'm fine. You look
like you've been sleeping in the office or something.
Well, let's hear it. There's some bad news, right?
Something happened while I was away? Yeah, that's
right, something's happened, Phil, but it wasn't
my fault, so help me. Okay, come on, let's have
it. We lost an account, Phil. Okay, so we lost
an account. We lost the Brewster account You
want to tell me that again I know it's real bad
news, but I don't know how else to tell you Brewster's
definitely out You want to tell me what you did
wrong Lou or nothing Phil I swear it'll come
out sooner or later Phil I had nothing to do
with it It started with a call from Charlie Edwards
a week after you left He wanted to talk to you.
He said it was urgent. I told him you weren't
here. He hung up Next thing I know there's a
letter from old man Brewster the official 90
-day notice of termination. What did you call
Charlie? Oh sure I called him Only Charlie isn't
the ad manager anymore Charlie's got a new job.
He was kicked upstairs. He's in customer relations
out of advertising completely There's a new guy
in charge. Oh, you know what you're telling me
You are telling me that our gross profit has
been cut in half. I think I don't know that I
better sit down The new ad manager's name is
Walter Van Haas six million dollars in billing
just just like that Charlie said the whole thing
was his fault. Who's? Walter Van Haas the new
ad manager Charlie says he started the whole
thing, but I never got the full story Charlie's
been too busy in his new job to talk to me. Give
me that phone. Yeah Charlie is not gonna be too
busy to talk to me I haven't been kicking back
ten grand a year to Charlie for him not to talk
to me. You want to know who Walter Van Haas is?
I'll tell you Phil, he's a boy scout and he won
his merit badge for backstabbing. So Walter Van
Haas is a backstabber. How did he get close enough
to do the job? He's my assistant. He's been my
assistant for like eight months. How come I never
knew him? Because that's the kind of guy Walter
is. He keeps in the background. He's a mouse,
Bill. A 200 buck a week mouse. Only this mouse
roared like a lion, right? Two weeks ago, he
came running into my office with a box full of
invoices. It seems he was conducting a private
investigation, Phil. Can you believe that guy?
He was checking into all the supplier bills you
guys sent over. He was actually checking out
every engraver, every stathouse, every printer,
every artist bill. Phil, he found overcharges
like 50, 60, even 100%. You were his boss, Charlie.
Why don't you tell him what to do with his invoices?
He thought I'd be shocked. He wanted us both
to go to Old Man Brewster and expose your agency.
That's when I did the only sensible thing and
what was that I offered him part of my take a
third of it Phil he practically turned blue when
I offered him that money him take a bribe the
honorable Walter Van Haas Are you kidding me?
It could have been the whole 10 ,000 and it wouldn't
have been enough It was a matter of principle
you dig. No, I don't He didn't tell Brewster
about my offer He wouldn't rat on me. That was
part of his code, too. But he did tell the old
man about the phony charges. I couldn't stop
him. That's when I got booted upstairs, and you
got booted out. And Mr. Walter Van Haas gets
your job. He didn't even want to accept that.
Can you believe it? Old man had to twist his
arm to get him to accept it, and a 50 -buck -a
-week raise. What is this guy, some kind of a
fanatic? I don't know how to describe Walter.
He's so square. He's so honest. I swear it's
true. You couldn't budge this guy for a million
bucks. A million bucks. A million bucks. The
great American words. The incantation of the
American dream. Charlie, did you ever hear of
the Chinaman button? The which? When you were
a kid. Didn't anybody ever ask you about it?
It's this kind of a puzzle. I guess you could
call it a moral dilemma. No, I never heard of
it. What's a Chinaman button? It goes like this
now suppose you were told that by simply pressing
a button you could kill the Chinaman thousands
of miles away a Chinaman whose fate meant nothing
to you no more than the fate of a fly on a table
and yet by pushing this button by sending just
one anonymous oriental to his death you would
receive one million dollars tax -free What would
you do Charlie I Don't know press the button
I guess sure that's right. You'd press the button
I'd press the button even Walter van Watts his
face would press the button No, not him not that
guy. Oh, yeah, sure. He would Charlie. No, I
really don't think so Phil Wally would think
about it and begin wondering if that Chinaman
might not have a wife and kids Walter does. He's
got five kids, as a matter of fact. You're wrong,
Charlie. Everybody's the same when it comes to
money as the great leveler. No, no, I really
mean it. Walter wouldn't push that button for
ten million dollars. That's the kind of guy he
is. And that's why you don't have the Brewster
account anymore. He pushed that button just like
anybody else. Okay, okay. What's the difference?
There isn't any chiming button. So, what's the
difference? That's right. There isn't any Chinaman
button. Or is there? I don't get you, Phil. What's
all this talk about a button? I didn't say there
had to be a button, Lou. Not literally. Or a
Chinaman, for that matter. Van Haar sounds Dutch.
How about a Dutchman? What are you talking about?
I think he drank a little too much at lunch.
He wouldn't be so high and mighty once he pressed
that button, would he? That would knock his halo
off. What? Which is worse, Lou? Taking a kick
back or killing a man? Oh, come on, Phil. Will
you talk sense? We'd have him right where we
want him. We could call the shots then, Lou.
We can get Charlie his job back. We might even
get our account back. Oh, for Pete's sake, Phil,
will you tell me what you're talking about? Better.
I'll show you what I mean. Only first, I gotta
compose a letter. A letter to who? Don't rush
me. This has got to be done right. We're going
to have to print up a special letterhead, something
that really looks authentic. Somebody in the
art department can do that. But what for? Here,
let me use that portable of yours. We'll have
to find one of those services that post letters
from overseas. Dear Mr. Van Haas, you're writing
this guy? Yep. Well, what are you going to say
to him? I am going to offer him... The American
Dream, love. Millie? Oh, Walter, I didn't know
you were home. I got here about ten minutes ago.
I was looking through the mail. How are you?
Oh, all right. Tired as usual. Isn't it kind
of chilly to be out here? Oh, I just had to get
out of the house. Kids have been impossible all
day. You know how hard it rained this morning.
Yes, yes, I know. Honey, did you see the letter?
The one from South Africa? Oh, yeah, sure, I
noticed it. Say the stamps, will you? Peter wants
them. Millie, Millie, do you know what the letter's
about? No, can't imagine. You don't know anyone
in South Africa, do you? Of course not, but somebody
there knows me. It's from some law firm. Look
at the letterhead. Dries, Hurtug, and... Beer...
Berenbroek? What a name. It's Dutch, I guess.
Dries Hardhagen Berenbroek. 200 Commissioners
Street, Johannesburg, South Africa. Read it,
huh? Well, it says, Dear Mr. Van Haas, our firm
is collecting data for record -keeping purposes
concerning the surviving family of one of our
clients. Would you be so good as to confirm the
following facts? Your name? Walter von Haas,
I can confirm that all right. Well, go on read
the rest your father's name Benjamin von Haas
right again your mother's name Sylvia reach Didn't
know your mother's name was Sylvia. She always
hated the name. That's why she called herself
Sally Anyway, now, let's see paternal grandparents
Jan von Haas Elsevort If the foregoing facts
are not correct, would you kindly advise us by
return mail? Well, I just saved some postage
anyway Is that all it says? Now, just one more
sentence. If these facts are correct, there is
no need for further communication. Thank you
for your attention to this matter. Yours faithfully,
L, something or other. I can't make out the signature.
For heaven's sakes, Walter, what do you suppose
it means? I've got the faintest idea. Maybe I've
got a rich uncle in South Africa. Maybe he owns
one of those diamond or gold mines. Oh, if only.
Tell him to send us a couple of diamonds fast.
Maybe we could start looking for a new house.
If I don't get out of this cheese box soon, I'll
just go out of my mind. I'll settle for a couple
of golden nuggets. We can melt them down and
use them to fill Elsa's teeth. That ought to
cut down that dental bill. Look, why don't you
write to those people in South Africa and ask
them what it's all about? Well, you heard what
the man wrote. If these facts are correct, there
is no need for further communication. Thank you
for your attention to this matter, faithfully
yours. Scribble, scribble. How does that sound,
Lou? Sounds like the real thing, Phil. Look at
that letterhead. Is that perfect or is that perfect?
Harry Trinner in the art department did it. Use
the transfer type you just rub on the paper.
You can't tell it from the real thing. Where'd
you get the maids from? Van Haas's family? I
got them from Charlie Edwards right out of the
files at the Brewster Company. And you really
got it mailed from South Africa? Yeah, straight
from Johannesburg. Air mail, special delivery.
Should have arrived by now. Phil, it's crazy.
You're going to all that trouble just for a joke
on the guy? It's not a joke. It's serious business.
Hand me that phone. What are you doing now? Hello,
Brewster Company? Mr. Van Haas, please. My name
is Thompson. Just tell Mr. Van Haas that I wish
to speak to him in connection with South Africa.
I'm sure he'll understand. Yeah. Yeah, I'll wait.
Phil, will you please tell me what you're doing?
I'm going to make an appointment with this man,
Lo. I'm going to make a deal with him. For the
Chinaman button. Phil Thurston seems to have
invented his own Chinaman button. But will his
improved model work? It all depends on Mr. Walter
Van Haas. We'll return shortly with Act 2. Now
let's go back to Phil Thurston. Or rather, let's
go back to Mr. Thompson, since that's the name
Mr. Thurston used to make his reservation at
the Ebtide restaurant in downtown Manhattan.
Nice of you to come all the way downtown to meet
me for lunch, Mr. Van Haas. That's okay. I'm
sorry I don't have a permanent office, so a place
like this is convenient for me. You still haven't
told me what business you're in, Mr. Thompson.
I would have come to your home for this meeting,
but I didn't want to disturb your wife and children.
You do have children, don't you? I sure do, five
of them. How old are they? Step ladder, two,
four, six, eight, ten. That's a lot of mouths
to feed. Yep, and teeth to fill. I don't doubt
it. Did you say that you were with that law firm
in Johannesburg grease Hartog and sorry can't
remember the last name I'm not sure I could pronounce
it if I did your family is Dutch isn't yeah,
my grandparents were hollanders But the rest
of us are strictly Yanks. Well, the answer is
no I don't come from the attorneys in Johannesburg,
but I wanted to talk to you about their letter
and frankly We couldn't figure it out million.
I that's my wife I don't remember having any
relatives in South Africa, and neither does my
father. Oh, your dad's alive then? Yes, he lives
in Allentown. I called him, but he didn't have
any answers. Well, maybe I can help. You see,
there is a relative, but a very distant one,
one of those cousins four and five times removed.
What's his name? Oh, I wouldn't mean anything
to you if I told you. Yeah, but you do know his
name. It is my business to know such things.
Well, that brings us back to the original question,
doesn't it? About what business you're in the
person who told me the name of your relative
was a clerk in the offices of Dries Hartog and
beer and book He works for them, but you might
say that he's on my payroll, too. I Don't think
I understand. He's the one who informed me about
the letter that was being sent to you and Why
it was being sent? Is there any reason why you
can't tell me my cousin's name? I'd rather not
I think you'll understand why later But I will
tell you something about him fine. He left the
Netherlands with his family when he was when
he was very young He's lived in South Africa
since he's in the diamond business. Well, well,
he's a widower. He has no children and he's rich
He is very very rich And at the moment he has
only one traceable heir. Wait a minute You mean
that I actually do have a rich uncle in South
Africa. No, I said cousin That's incredible.
I mean, Milly and I were kidding about it. We
even said that he might be in the diamond business.
Oh, he is. Very much so. And are you saying that
I'm his only heir? That's correct. Well, if there
was the possibility of some kind of inheritance,
why didn't the lawyer say so? Simple enough.
There was nothing to say. What? The attorneys
were only performing a routine function. Putting
the gentleman's will in good order. Undoubtedly,
they'll have to redraw the will sooner or later
in favor of a closer relation such as a new wife.
A wife? You see, this rich cousin of yours is
only 41 and in excellent health. How old are
you, Mr. Van Huss? 43. So that's all there was
to it, just a routine inquiry. At the moment,
that's all there is to it. Well, I'm not surprised.
I... I never did believe you get something for
nothing in this world. I said at the moment.
What do you mean? Mr. Van Haas, you don't know
this man in South Africa. You don't know the
first thing about him. In fact, he means nothing
at all to you. I guess so. The only way he could
mean something to you is by dying, isn't it right?
Well, that's a rough way of putting it, but if
you mean that he won't benefit me until his death...
I guess that's obvious now What if I told you
that this man will be dead in two or three days?
And that his entire estate will be yours. I thought
you said he was healthy. I'm just asking how
you would feel Sorry for the guy I spoke sorry
about a man. You don't know he's a human being
I see Mr. Van Huss did you read the newspaper
this morning? Yes, I did you looked at the obituary
page Yeah, briefly. Did you feel sorry for all
the people whose death was reported? Did you
feel any real sorrow for them? No, I can't say
I felt sorrow. Because they were all strangers,
weren't they? All right, Mr. Thompson, I'm a
human being, too, and I guess if I got a letter
from Drees, Hartog, and whatever telling me that
I was rich, I wouldn't go into mourning. I'd...
Probably go out and celebrate. If you saw my
kids' dental bills, you'd understand. But I do
understand. Believe me, I understand very well.
That's why I wanted to see you, to suggest arranging
that happy event without the slightest trouble
on your part, without any obligation until you're
completely satisfied. What the devil does that
mean? All you have to do is say yes. Just that
one word and your dream will come true. Yes to
what? In a short time, you'll receive another
letter from Johannesburg, informing you of the
sad news that your cousin, Mr... Well, I still
won't reveal his name. Let him remain anonymous.
That'll make your decision a great deal easier,
I'm sure. What decision? The decision to inherit
his estate. Now hold it just a minute. Are you
talking about... Please, keep your voice down.
Mr. Van Haas. I'm making this as easy for you
as pushing a button. If you give your approval,
my agents in Johannesburg will be contacted within
hours. The rest will be handled simply and with
dispatch. All you'll have to do is wait for official
notification of your inheritance. When the money
arrives, of course, I'll expect payment in the
amount of 50 % of the total. By our calculations,
I'd say that total should be just about, uh,
one million U .S. dollars. Good Lord, I s...
I really think that... I think you mean it. I
think you really do. I know you have scruples,
Mr. Van Haas, but I also think you have common
sense. Listen, Mr. Thompson, if that's your name...
Yes, of course, you're quite right. It isn't.
But it's the name you'll use to get in touch
with me. I'm not getting in touch with you because
I can give you your answer right now. It is no.
Don't be so hasty. I've never heard such a filthy...
proposition in my entire life. Look, if the percentage
is the problem, we can discuss it. Our organization
has been known to be flexible about such things.
Money has nothing to do with it. We could base
our agreement on a sliding scale. That is, we
would take fifty percent of any inherited amount
up to and including one million dollars. Anything
after that, our percentage would be forty percent.
Does that sound more attractive? You talk about
it like it was some kind of a simple business
deal. But it is. especially simple for you, a
very clean, very uncomplicated deal. You do nothing
at all, Mr. Van Haas. Can I make you understand
that? You won't be connected to your cousin's
death in any way. In fact, our agents are so
expert at what they do, it's almost certainly
going to be called an accident. Believe me, we've
never had the slightest bit of trouble in the
past. You heard my answer, Mr. Thompson. Now
if you'll excuse me. You haven't had your lunch
yet. My appetite is gone. Van Haas. What? I'm
sorry. Perhaps I put the whole thing to you too
bluntly. I shouldn't have expected a man like
yourself to agree immediately. Or ever. All right,
all right. Maybe you'll never agree. But at least
give yourself some time to think it over. I don't
need any time. Just 12 hours. 12 hours, that's
all I'm talking about. Now, if you change your
mind any time during the next 12 hours, you can
reach me at the Florentine Hotel on 51st Street.
Did you get that name? I don't need to remember
it, Mr. Thompson. I'd like to forget your name,
too, and this whole conversation. I'll be at
the Florentine Hotel between 8 o 'clock and midnight
tonight. Don't call me after 12, my sleeping
habits, you understand? I don't see how you can
sleep at all, Mr. Thompson. You'd be amazed at
how well rich men sleep. Well, you can go to
bed early tonight. Don't wait up for my call
because there won't be one. Goodbye. So long,
Walter. I'll be hearing from you. Honey, honey,
cut it out. Stop it. No, no, no, no, no. Tell
me what the matter is. Nothing. It's nothing.
It's got to be something, Millie. Are the kids
okay? Yes, they're all right. It's pretty quiet
in the playroom. Well, that's because I bagged
the twins off to mother. They were getting out
of hand, Walter. I just couldn't stand it anymore.
Okay, fine. I'm sure your mother is delighted.
You know what's wrong with you? You're not eating
right. You're eating like a bird these days.
Well, that's practically all I can afford to
buy these days. Bird food. I didn't mean that,
Walter. Honest, I didn't. I know you didn't.
I know it. Look, honey, I wish you'd see Dr.
Julian and have him check you over. Walter...
I did see Dr. Julian. You did? When? This morning.
I didn't know you were going. Well, I didn't
want you to know. Not until I was sure, anyway.
Sure about what? Hey, you're not sick, are you?
I mean, did he find anything serious? No, I'm
not sick. I'm pregnant, Walter. What? You see,
I'm not over the hill after all. I can still
make babies. It should be some sort of comfort
shouldn't it a baby Dr. Julian shook his finger
at me and said he was going to call you sometime
and give you a lecture on the population explosion
Well, that's just great honey. No Walter. It's
not just great. Oh Honey, don't pretend to be
happy about it I just can't be. Well, it's not
the end of the world. Oh, that's right. It's
a beginning, isn't it? That's what Mother said
when I told her. She's always said that, even
with the first one, with Peter. Ten years ago,
almost eleven. Walter, do you realize we've been
married almost thirteen years? I know, Mellie,
and I know they haven't always been easy years.
Why is everything always beginning? When does
the middle of everything start for us? Is our
life just going to go from beginning to end without
anything worthwhile in the middle? Oh, no! What
was that? I asked Elsa to wash the dishes and
put them away. I'd better get in there before
they're all broken. Milly, we have to talk. After
dinner, all right? I haven't even started it
yet. I'm sorry. It's all right. I've got some
work to do anyway. Or... Some thinking, anyway.
That's right, Charlie. I'm staying downtown tonight.
Ah, you got something going for you, Phil? You
might say that. Oh, you bachelors really have
a good life. Where does she live? Pat around
here? Actually, I took a hotel room for a couple
of days at the Florentine. She wouldn't have
a friend, would she? Well, I could call Louise
and tell her I have to work tonight. Now, forget
it. She'll never buy that. My wife's got a built
-in lie detector. Don't eat your heart out, Charlie.
This is strictly a business proposition. Yeah,
I know your business proposition's filled monkey
business. You're trying to get a new client for
the agency, right? Something like that. How do
you think it looks? Will you get the deal? Charlie,
I'm almost dead sure of it. Will Walter Van Haas
press the Chinaman button? Would you press it?
To make a million dollars? Before you answer,
wait until we return with Act 3. Now let's pay
a visit to the Florentine Hotel. It's a posh
little hotel with all the conveniences. And in
room 610, there's a gentleman registered under
the name of Thompson. That was a request for
the gang at the Williamsburg warehouse. Hello,
Phil. Hi, Lou. Come on in. So, this is the Florentine
Hotel, huh? Well, it's not a bad -looking room.
Why, the corners are sweet. That's right. The
bedroom is in there. Look at this bar set up.
Glasses, refrigerator, everything. It's nice.
Very nice. You want a drink? All I got is vodka.
Oh, no, thanks. I'm strictly a Scotch, man. You
know that. Sorry about that. That's okay. I'm
not staying long. I'll just leave the layouts
and the reports for you to look over. We can
talk about them in the morning at the shop. Relax,
Lou. Your wife knows you're working late tonight,
doesn't she? Yeah, she knows. Sit down. Take
it easy. Look, I got some orange juice. I can
make you a screwdriver. No, thanks, Phil. Guess
I have to drink alone, then. Well... Aren't you
gonna ask me about your friend Van Haas? What
about him? I told you I was going to see him
today or rather that Mr. Thompson was going to
see him. Did you? That's right. I saw him for
lunch and told him the whole story about how
easy it was for him to become a millionaire just
by pushing the Chinaman button. Or maybe I should
have called it the Dutchman button. Did he believe
it, Phil? All the way. But did he go for it?
I mean about having the guy in South Africa killed.
No. No, he wouldn't go along. Ah, so Charlie
was right. He said no because he was scared.
He was afraid that he was getting into something
too deep for him. Well, maybe that wasn't it,
Phil. Maybe he is the kind of guy Charlie says
he is. Maybe he was that kind of guy, Lou. That
was before he ever got really tempted. A lot
of people are honest because they never had anything
worth being dishonest about. Am I right? You
don't think much of people, do you? I think people
are people, that's all. Open your eyes, Lou.
Look at what's happening all around you. Everybody's
on the grab. You don't know that by now. You've
been living in a cave all your life. All right,
all right. I don't want to argue with you. Everybody's
corruptible, Lou. Everybody. High and low. Yeah,
it sure looks like it these days. These days,
old days, any days. We're just hearing more about
it now. That's the only difference. But there
are limits, Phil. I mean... Like what you offered,
Van Haas. Well, let's face it, you were talking
about murder. Maybe that's the word that came
to his mind, too. But when he thinks it over,
he'll give it a different name. He'll come to
the conclusion that all I was talking about was
pushing a button. You mean you still think he'll
say yes? I told him to call me here. That's why
I took this suite at the hotel under the name
of Thompson. So that's what it was. And I figured...
I don't know that you had some chick you didn't
want to know your right name. I told Van Haas
to call me here any time before midnight in case
he changed his mind. Before midnight? It's almost
11 o 'clock now. That's right. Why did you give
him a deadline? Because he needs one. We all
need one or we postpone things forever. Phil,
I don't think he'll call. Why not? I think the
guy's already made up his mind. No, he hasn't.
He's watching the clock right now, just as we
are. He's watching those hands move towards 12,
thinking about how simple it would be to pick
up the phone and call. You see, that's the beauty
part of the whole thing, the simplicity. You
remember that old camera slogan, you press the
button, we do the rest. No, I don't think you're
right. I don't think he'll do it. I can see him
right this minute, Lou. Maybe he's in bed, looking
up at the ceiling. Maybe he's locked himself
up in the study and he's telling himself all
the reasons why he shouldn't say yes Then he
wonders if he's really fair to make the decision
all by himself. I mean, I mean there's his wife,
too He remembers all the little deprivations
all the promises he made to her when they were
younger those trips to Europe the mink coat And
there are the kids of course five kids Lou think
what that money would mean to them He's really
moved by the thought of the kids, you know Maybe
I'll have a drink after all. He's not thinking
of himself, of course. No, he doesn't count the
things he would like to do, the places he wants
to see, or that car he wants to own. You ever
know a man who didn't want some car he couldn't
afford? Yeah, and then there's that nice smug
feeling of security he could have with that pile
of money swelling with interest in some bank
that never thought he was worth more than a calendar
at Christmas. Well, maybe he is thinking all
that, Phil, but... Just saying. I don't think
he'll call. Walter, honey, are you still awake?
Yep. Do you feel all right? Yeah, I'm okay. You're
not still thinking about it, are you? About what?
About... You know, the baby. Oh, no, no. I wasn't
thinking about the baby. Go back to sleep, honey.
You know, I'm less than two months gone, honey.
If you're really upset about... Stop that kind
of talk. Well, I just thought... Well, there
are alternatives. I'm sick of hearing about that
alternative. I... I heard about it the last time
you were pregnant, remember? I'm sorry. I know
you're worried about money. I know all the debts
we have. We'll get along. Honey, you're not angry
with me. No, I'm not angry. I'm just restless.
I've got business worries. Can't turn my mind
off. Why don't you read a while? The light will
keep you awake. I'll go to the living room. Walter?
Yep. I love you. I love you too, Milly. Listen
to that clock. Why do cheap clocks have to tick
so loud? We've got to get ourselves an electric
one, maybe one of those digital clocks. Darling,
they cost money. Yes. What doesn't? Hello? Oh,
yeah, yeah, I ordered the Scotch. Oh, you can't,
huh? All right, thanks. Sorry, Lou. Room service
can't deliver from the bar after 11 .30. That's
okay, Phil. I don't really want to drink anyway.
I'm almost out of liquor myself. You're almost
out of time, too. Quarter to 12. Gee, I just
can't believe it. I can't believe that guy could
be that stupid. Is that what you call it? Of
course. I mean, who wouldn't jump at a chance
like this? Oh, I'm making it so easy for him,
so painless. Easier than scratching along on
a paycheck shot through with deductions. Easier
than bowing and scraping every day of your life
to people whose guts he hates. You know, old
man Brewster, can you imagine having to be nice
to that guy every day? We did it. Yes. That's
why I know. Ah, Phil. I think you're taking this
joke much too much to heart. You're letting it
mean too much to you. There's still time left
for him to call. But he won't. He's probably
getting panicky right now. What about you, Phil?
He sees the whole thing slipping away from him.
He's telling himself how dumb he is. He's telling
himself that the Chinaman doesn't mean a thing
to him. Dutchman. He's telling himself that he's
got a bigger duty, a greater responsibility to
his wife, to his kids, even to himself. Well,
forget it. It's over. It's no concern of his
what happened 7 ,000 miles away. He doesn't have
to dirty his hands. All he has to do is call.
You're lost, Phil. Why don't you admit it? Aren't
you gonna answer it? Sure, sure. I'll answer
it. Maybe room service again, maybe Hello, mr.
Thompson, this is Walter von Haas Okay, okay,
I'm coming I'm coming who is it room service
ah Breakfast come on in. I'm starving. Yes Are
you sure those scrambled eggs are hot? They tasted
like rubber yesterday morning. They should be
all right, sir. Yeah, well, you tell the chef
he'll hear from me if they aren't. Yes, sir.
Will you sign right here, sir? Okay. There you
are. Thank you. I'll be back later for the table.
Half an hour. That's all I need. Yes, sir. Well,
I guess my shower's gonna have to wait. Oh, now
what? Hello? Phil. It's Lou. Oh, hi. What's up?
How come you're still at the hotel? I thought
you were just going to stay there one or two
days. It's the third day now. I like it here.
I may stay until the end of the week. Besides,
I saw some great -looking chicks at the bar downstairs.
Well, what's happening? Nothing. I was just wondering
if you knew anything about, you know, Van Haas.
Walter Van Haas? He's just waiting for the mailman,
Lou, waiting to hear the good news from South
Africa. I spoke to Charlie Edwards. He says Van
Haas called in sick yesterday. I'll bet he was
sick. I'll bet he was home planning on ways to
spend all that money he thinks he's gonna get.
One million bucks. No, 500 grand. Are you coming
into the office soon, Phil? Sure, I'll be there
just as soon as I finish breakfast and grab a
shower. I'll see you later, then. All right.
I'll bet those eggs are cold for sure. Oh, for
Pete's sake, it's a conspiracy. Hello, Mr. Thompson.
Well, what are you doing here? May I come in?
I told you not to get in touch with me, Van Haas.
Yes, I know you did, but I... I had to talk to
you in person. I told you that it was for your
own protection. Don't worry. I found out your
room number and I came up the back stairs. Nobody
knows I'm here. Well, why are you here? Please,
let me come in. All right. As you can see, I'm
just about to take a shower, so whatever you
have to say, would you make it fast? Yes, I'll
make it fast. I hope you haven't come here to
say that you've changed your mind because it's
too late for that. The thing is over and done
with. It is? You're sure of that? As soon as
you gave me your okay, I was in touch with our
agents in Johannesburg. They didn't waste any
time either. And it went all right? Flawlessly,
just as I promised. All you have to do is wait.
Yes, I see. Hi, I just had to hear it from you.
Mr. Thompson. I I had to hear it from myself
Well now you've heard it now you go home and
you wait for the mailman Yes the mailman What's
the matter van house? He looks strange you feel
all right. Oh, yes, I feel fine Truth is I I
Never felt better in my life good good. I'm glad
to hear I feel a lot different than I felt two
days ago I can't tell you what a torture it was
for me to make that phone call to you. Absolute
torture. But after I hung up, I felt as light
as a feather. You did, huh? Yeah, I felt fine.
I felt wonderful. Even though I got myself involved
in killing a man. It's funny, isn't it? It was
easy, wasn't it? Just like I said it would be.
Yes, that's the word. I never knew anything could
be that easy. Changed me, Mr. Thompson. I saw
how stupid I'd been all my life. How stupid most
of us are. To waste the one life we're given.
I owe you a lot. Well, if you came to say thanks,
you're welcome. Now, if you'll excuse me... I
felt like a giant. I felt... I felt... There
was nothing I couldn't do. I was a coward before,
a weakling. But you showed me a better way. Okay,
okay. Would you go home now, Mr. Van Haas? I
mean, the less we see of each other, the better.
Now, when the money arrives, I'll be in touch
with you. About my 50%. Yes, your 50%. That's
really what I wanted to discuss, Mr. Thompson.
Tell me, does this fireplace work? Or is it just
for show? I really wouldn't know. But I see that
they have all the implements. What are you doing
with that poker? Van Haas. Are you crazy? Sorry,
Mr. Thompson, but 100 % is so much better. I
thought I'd have to bring a hammer or something,
but a poker was so much better. Now, into the
bathroom, Mr. Thompson. Into the shower What
a shame that you slipped in the tub mr. Thompson,
what a terrible shame Now I have to go to wait
for the mailman There's an old saying If you're
going to dig a grave for a man, make sure you
dig two. I'll return shortly. Ready for an instructive
statement? It goes like this. The wonderful thing
about radio is... that it can be enjoyed in complete
darkness. And isn't darkness the natural medium
for mystery? Our cast included Paul Hecht, Ralph
Bell, Mason Adams, Evie Juster, and Will Hare.
The entire production was under the direction
of Hyman Brown. This is E .G. Marshall inviting
you to return to our mystery theater for another
adventure in the macabre. Until next time, pleasant
dreams.