WEBVTT

00:00:00.700 --> 00:00:03.740
The Johnson Wax Program with Fibber McGee and

00:00:03.740 --> 00:00:14.019
Molly. The makers of Johnson's wax products for

00:00:14.019 --> 00:00:16.100
home and industry present Fibber McGee and Molly.

00:00:16.519 --> 00:00:18.539
Histrionically helped by Bill Thompson, Gail

00:00:18.539 --> 00:00:21.160
Gordon, Bea Benadert, Arthur Q. Bryan, Jimmy

00:00:21.160 --> 00:00:23.539
Jordan, and the man with the stuff that polishes

00:00:23.539 --> 00:00:26.219
your things, me, Harlow Wilcox. The scripts can

00:00:26.219 --> 00:00:28.420
be blamed on Don Quinn and Phil Leslie, and the

00:00:28.420 --> 00:00:30.440
music department is managed by the King's Men

00:00:30.440 --> 00:00:33.539
and Billy Mills and his all -boy -but -one orchestra.

00:00:56.009 --> 00:00:58.250
Millions of housewives know that Johnson's wax

00:00:58.250 --> 00:01:00.890
is unbeatable for beautifying your floors. But

00:01:00.890 --> 00:01:02.710
I have heard that in some homes, Johnson's wax

00:01:02.710 --> 00:01:05.010
is used on the floors only. Well, what about

00:01:05.010 --> 00:01:07.129
the rest of your home? Perhaps you have a table

00:01:07.129 --> 00:01:09.370
you're especially proud of. Try waxing that,

00:01:09.569 --> 00:01:11.290
too. You'll be delighted to see how much more

00:01:11.290 --> 00:01:13.269
handsome it looks, how it glows with a smooth

00:01:13.269 --> 00:01:16.109
satin machine, how the wax brings out the beautiful

00:01:16.109 --> 00:01:18.980
natural grain. Notice how even the very first

00:01:18.980 --> 00:01:21.260
protective coat of Johnson's wax on your radio

00:01:21.260 --> 00:01:23.760
cabinet, your sideboard, your ornaments and picture

00:01:23.760 --> 00:01:26.540
frames gives them a wonderful richness, a mellow

00:01:26.540 --> 00:01:28.760
glow that adds immeasurably to their beauty.

00:01:29.400 --> 00:01:30.980
You will find of course that these things grow

00:01:30.980 --> 00:01:33.700
even lovelier with each wax application. They

00:01:33.700 --> 00:01:35.599
become better and better protected too against

00:01:35.599 --> 00:01:38.959
dirt, wear and spill things. So by all means

00:01:38.959 --> 00:01:41.280
Johnson wax your floors for greater beauty and

00:01:41.280 --> 00:01:43.719
protection, but also make the rest of your home

00:01:43.719 --> 00:01:46.409
sparkling clean and beautiful. with Johnson's

00:01:46.409 --> 00:02:11.030
wax, face liquid, or cream. It's all very well

00:02:11.030 --> 00:02:13.449
for a man to laugh at the stuffed cuffs, the

00:02:13.449 --> 00:02:15.930
draped shape, and the replete. But when he begins

00:02:15.930 --> 00:02:18.270
to look like he dressed himself onto the war

00:02:18.270 --> 00:02:21.689
relief clothing barrel at the firehouse It's

00:02:21.689 --> 00:02:23.770
time something was said about it according to

00:02:23.770 --> 00:02:32.090
Mrs. McGee Our favorite McGee and Molly! What's

00:02:32.090 --> 00:02:33.870
the matter with the way I dress, Molly? Well,

00:02:34.050 --> 00:02:36.629
frankly pet, it's that tired old suit Who made

00:02:36.629 --> 00:02:39.229
it, George Pullman? What do you mean, George

00:02:39.229 --> 00:02:42.969
Pullman? Looks like it had been slept in That

00:02:42.969 --> 00:02:45.669
Blue Surge monstrosity has more bags in it than

00:02:45.669 --> 00:02:48.810
the Grand Central Checkbox. The seat and elbow

00:02:48.810 --> 00:02:51.550
is glared like an acre of broken bottles. When

00:02:51.550 --> 00:02:53.389
the fabric is so thin it takes you ten minutes

00:02:53.389 --> 00:02:55.990
to sit down. And it fits like it had been made

00:02:55.990 --> 00:03:00.750
for a jockey and let out for Paul Whiteman. Oh,

00:03:00.830 --> 00:03:04.250
it isn't so bad, Mommy. A Blue Surge suit always

00:03:04.250 --> 00:03:06.610
lasts a long time because they pick up so much

00:03:06.610 --> 00:03:10.389
lint. I've had as much wear out of the lint as

00:03:10.389 --> 00:03:13.599
I have out of the suit. Well now you simply got

00:03:13.599 --> 00:03:15.759
to buy a new one, McGee Oh, Molly, you know how

00:03:15.759 --> 00:03:17.240
I hate to stay And that's why I called this tailor

00:03:17.240 --> 00:03:19.419
He said he'd be over with some samples I still

00:03:19.419 --> 00:03:21.460
say that this... Who? Who said who'd be over

00:03:21.460 --> 00:03:23.699
with what samples? The tailor! He just opened

00:03:23.699 --> 00:03:25.539
a new shop next to the bomb town and you need

00:03:25.539 --> 00:03:27.400
a new suit right now Oh, for the love of... I'm

00:03:27.400 --> 00:03:29.379
simply tired of walking around with a man whose

00:03:29.379 --> 00:03:31.159
suit looks like the back wall of a headlight

00:03:31.159 --> 00:03:34.620
And this Mr. Gusset Who? Mr. Gusset, the tailor

00:03:34.620 --> 00:03:36.960
He said... Oh, I'll get that to him right now

00:03:36.960 --> 00:03:39.500
Come in! Is this the residence of the McGee?

00:03:39.840 --> 00:03:42.360
Oh, hello there, Miss McGee. Good day, Mr. Gussett.

00:03:42.740 --> 00:03:45.099
McGee, this is Mr. Gussett. This is the husband

00:03:45.099 --> 00:03:48.500
I was telling you about, Mr. Gussett. Now look

00:03:48.500 --> 00:03:49.800
here, you two. I don't know what you've cooked

00:03:49.800 --> 00:03:51.639
up between you, but if you think I'm gonna be

00:03:51.639 --> 00:03:53.199
jacked into buying a new suit that I don't want

00:03:53.199 --> 00:03:55.599
and don't need, buy George a - Amazing, that's

00:03:55.599 --> 00:03:58.539
what it is. Amazing. What's amazing, Mr. Gussett?

00:03:58.639 --> 00:04:01.800
The resemblance, Mrs. McGee. He has shoulders

00:04:01.800 --> 00:04:04.849
exactly like Herbert Marshall. Oh, it's gonna

00:04:04.849 --> 00:04:07.349
be a distinct pleasure to fit him. Flattery will

00:04:07.349 --> 00:04:10.050
get you no place, bud. This whole thing is a

00:04:10.050 --> 00:04:12.810
frame up and I won't be... Herbert Marshall is

00:04:12.810 --> 00:04:15.770
taller than I am, ain't he? Yes, slightly, Mr.

00:04:15.870 --> 00:04:19.009
McGee, but actual height is not important. It's

00:04:19.009 --> 00:04:21.790
the bill that counts. You know, the athletic

00:04:21.790 --> 00:04:25.230
type, the military posture, broad shoulders tapering

00:04:25.230 --> 00:04:28.689
down to slim hips. Who we talking about now?

00:04:31.189 --> 00:04:33.410
Had a guess, Mr. McGee. I'd say you'd been...

00:04:33.439 --> 00:04:36.480
Well, a colonel, military intelligence? Ah ha

00:04:36.480 --> 00:04:41.360
ha ha, that's kinda hush hush bud. Ah, but let's

00:04:41.360 --> 00:04:43.279
see your samples, Gusset, old man. What have

00:04:43.279 --> 00:04:45.800
you got? I'll tell you what. Suppose I look over

00:04:45.800 --> 00:04:47.980
your entire wardrobe, Mr. McGee, and then I can

00:04:47.980 --> 00:04:49.339
tell you better what you need. That's a good

00:04:49.339 --> 00:04:51.379
idea, bud. Take a good look at it. Is it upstairs?

00:04:52.019 --> 00:04:54.279
And no, no, it's right here. He's wearing it.

00:04:54.279 --> 00:04:56.839
What? He never worried much about his clothes,

00:04:56.899 --> 00:04:59.319
Mr. Gusset. Just as long as he can keep warm

00:04:59.319 --> 00:05:01.120
in the winter and not get arrested in the summer,

00:05:01.160 --> 00:05:05.160
he's convinced. Well then, I would suggest a

00:05:05.160 --> 00:05:07.680
good tweed suit, Mrs. McGee. You could wear the

00:05:07.680 --> 00:05:09.920
jacket with odd trousers for informal occasions.

00:05:09.980 --> 00:05:11.860
Good idea, Gus. Have I got some odd trousers,

00:05:12.199 --> 00:05:15.980
Molly? Odd is hardly the word, dear. Terrifying,

00:05:16.100 --> 00:05:18.779
it'd be more accurate. Why, those green flannels

00:05:18.779 --> 00:05:20.540
you wear to take out the ashes are... How about

00:05:20.540 --> 00:05:23.060
this sample right here, Mr. McGee? This is a

00:05:23.060 --> 00:05:25.660
genuine English tweed. I'd make it up in a single

00:05:25.660 --> 00:05:28.000
-breasted patch pocketed style. Splendid utility

00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:29.939
garment. We'll take that. Hey now, wait a minute,

00:05:30.019 --> 00:05:32.339
wait a minute. I can make my own selections.

00:05:32.589 --> 00:05:34.490
I ain't gonna be railroaded into something that

00:05:34.490 --> 00:05:36.889
I... I understand that it's Mr. Herbert Marshall's

00:05:36.889 --> 00:05:39.149
favorite material. But he's taller, you said.

00:05:39.189 --> 00:05:41.589
He also said the height wasn't important, Molly.

00:05:41.910 --> 00:05:43.709
It's the bill that counts. You heard him say

00:05:43.709 --> 00:05:48.470
that. I'll take this one, bud. You don't think

00:05:48.470 --> 00:05:50.910
Herbert Marshall will mind? I won't mention it

00:05:50.910 --> 00:05:53.769
to him, Mr. McGee. Besides, I'm sure you and

00:05:53.769 --> 00:05:57.389
he never attend the same... What? Now for the

00:05:57.389 --> 00:06:00.689
measurements. Let's see, where is my tape measure

00:06:00.689 --> 00:06:04.480
anyway, oh? oh yes here we are now let's see

00:06:04.480 --> 00:06:09.660
chest 35 take a deep breath please mr mcgee chest

00:06:09.660 --> 00:06:21.019
expanded hmm 35 very interesting waist 41 take

00:06:21.019 --> 00:06:25.120
another deep breath please mr mcgee waist expanded

00:06:25.120 --> 00:06:31.220
46 Deep breather, aren't you, Mr. McGee? Yeah,

00:06:31.220 --> 00:06:35.899
yeah. I got low lungs. That's why I don't catch

00:06:35.899 --> 00:06:37.620
cold when I leave my shirt collar open at the

00:06:37.620 --> 00:06:44.079
front. Now then, let's see. Shoulders. Yep. Arms.

00:06:44.839 --> 00:06:49.699
Trousers length. Well, that does it. Good. Now

00:06:49.699 --> 00:06:51.300
then, would you like to make a deposit on this

00:06:51.300 --> 00:06:53.519
suit, Mr. McGee? You want an honest answer? Yes.

00:06:53.639 --> 00:06:59.120
No. How much will it be, Mr. Gutted? $110, Mrs.

00:06:59.259 --> 00:07:03.720
McGee. My usual price is $150, but in as much

00:07:03.720 --> 00:07:05.899
as you're my first customers in Whistler Bistro...

00:07:05.899 --> 00:07:08.019
Now, just a darn minute, Bud. Did I hear you

00:07:08.019 --> 00:07:10.779
say 110 bucks? You did. Seems a little high to

00:07:10.779 --> 00:07:14.060
me. High? Why, for 110 bucks, I could buy me

00:07:14.060 --> 00:07:15.819
a set of threads that would make Adolf Mons you

00:07:15.819 --> 00:07:18.379
look like a bouncer at a barn dance. A hundred

00:07:18.379 --> 00:07:20.660
and ten bucks, why, of all the... May I make

00:07:20.660 --> 00:07:22.740
a suggestion, Mr. McGee? Certainly, Mr. Gussett.

00:07:22.759 --> 00:07:24.779
Better make one quick, Bud, before I make one.

00:07:24.959 --> 00:07:26.879
As you know, I'm new here in Whistler, Mr. McGee.

00:07:26.879 --> 00:07:28.399
Yeah, and at these prices, you ain't gonna get

00:07:28.399 --> 00:07:31.819
very old, too, either. Let the man talk, dearie.

00:07:32.000 --> 00:07:35.160
Go on, Mr. Gussett. I was about to suggest that

00:07:35.160 --> 00:07:38.360
should Mr. McGee, as my representative unannounced,

00:07:38.420 --> 00:07:41.839
of course, send me, say, ten customers, well,

00:07:42.060 --> 00:07:44.139
I shall be glad to make a suit for your charge.

00:07:44.300 --> 00:07:46.319
What? If I send you ten customers for a suit,

00:07:46.399 --> 00:07:50.540
you'll... It's a deal. Good. Shake. Right. Music.

00:09:43.149 --> 00:09:45.049
You know what? Know what? I already got four

00:09:45.049 --> 00:09:47.309
customers for new suits. Maury Needham, Jeff

00:09:47.309 --> 00:09:49.830
Lewis, Mel Brorby, and Willie Connolly. Mm -hmm.

00:09:50.090 --> 00:09:51.710
I didn't know you knew that many people with

00:09:51.710 --> 00:09:54.529
$110. Well, I've been putting on quite a telephone

00:09:54.529 --> 00:09:56.409
campaign. I got a sales clock worked up to get

00:09:56.409 --> 00:09:58.190
some... Get out the breadcrumbs, McGee. Here

00:09:58.190 --> 00:10:00.830
comes a pigeon. Watch me sell him a suit. Come

00:10:00.830 --> 00:10:03.730
in. Oh, hello there, Dr. Gamble. Come right in.

00:10:03.950 --> 00:10:06.429
Hello, my dear. And good afternoon, knuckle noodle.

00:10:09.230 --> 00:10:12.909
Hi, I'm Edison Chess. What's new on the German

00:10:12.909 --> 00:10:15.210
side of the world? Nothing startling, Beaver

00:10:15.210 --> 00:10:17.870
knows. What's cooking in your dull little life?

00:10:17.970 --> 00:10:19.850
Well, you know, I've just talked him into getting

00:10:19.850 --> 00:10:23.429
a new suit, Doctor. No. Yes, sir. And if I may

00:10:23.429 --> 00:10:26.409
make a suggestion to our kindly old family physician,

00:10:26.809 --> 00:10:28.570
in at about time you shook yourself loose from

00:10:28.570 --> 00:10:31.669
that bundle of burlap you're wearing, you look

00:10:31.669 --> 00:10:35.129
like a delegate to the hobo's convention. I don't

00:10:35.129 --> 00:10:36.769
know where that suit hides during the branding

00:10:36.769 --> 00:10:38.990
season, but it sure ain't ever felt a hot iron.

00:10:44.720 --> 00:10:46.840
Oh, I don't think the doctor looks so bad, McGee

00:10:46.840 --> 00:10:48.980
Not that any man couldn't choose a new suit now

00:10:48.980 --> 00:10:50.879
and then Well thanks, Molly But who is little

00:10:50.879 --> 00:10:53.840
Jasbo Brummel to talk? He always looks like an

00:10:53.840 --> 00:10:59.580
unmade bed in a 50 cent flop house That blue

00:10:59.580 --> 00:11:02.139
surge of his shines like a good deed in a naughty

00:11:02.139 --> 00:11:06.960
world Well I'm doing something about my appearance,

00:11:07.080 --> 00:11:10.570
Ether Drum I'm getting a new suit But you'll

00:11:10.570 --> 00:11:12.750
go on wearing that sideshow canvas of yours for

00:11:12.750 --> 00:11:15.629
the next 18 years, I suppose. Frankly, Doctor,

00:11:15.750 --> 00:11:17.409
I imagine you're so busy these days you haven't

00:11:17.409 --> 00:11:19.090
much time to give to your parents, huh? I've

00:11:19.090 --> 00:11:21.049
got just as much time as this little bloater,

00:11:21.210 --> 00:11:23.929
my dear. And when I get a new suit, I won't get

00:11:23.929 --> 00:11:27.250
one of his $18 walk upstairs and save $3 two

00:11:27.250 --> 00:11:29.750
-pants affairs with a Daisy Air Rifle premium.

00:11:32.659 --> 00:11:34.740
I'll go to a decent tailor and lay it on the

00:11:34.740 --> 00:11:37.279
line for a quality product. Oh yeah, if you ever

00:11:37.279 --> 00:11:39.620
had to shell out $110 for a suit, you couldn't

00:11:39.620 --> 00:11:43.519
see the checkbook through your tears. Now, wait

00:11:43.519 --> 00:11:46.779
a minute, jughead. Are you getting a $110 suit?

00:11:46.899 --> 00:11:48.759
Yes, he is, Doctor. The tailor was just here

00:11:48.759 --> 00:11:50.379
measuring him up. Guy by the name of Gusset,

00:11:50.419 --> 00:11:52.379
next to the Bontan, Doc. Well, I'm going right

00:11:52.379 --> 00:11:54.580
down there and order two suits. Anything you

00:11:54.580 --> 00:11:57.139
can do, McGee, I can do better, quicker, oftener,

00:11:57.159 --> 00:12:00.259
and at higher prices. See you later, Molly. Fine,

00:12:00.379 --> 00:12:02.259
Doctor. Now remember the name Gusset next to

00:12:02.259 --> 00:12:04.059
the Bontan. Yeah, and if you want extra pants,

00:12:04.200 --> 00:12:06.299
Doc, mention my name and get a good seat. Ha!

00:12:10.259 --> 00:12:12.279
McGee, your name wouldn't be good for credit

00:12:12.279 --> 00:12:16.039
for a hot rock in Death Valley. It'll be interesting

00:12:16.039 --> 00:12:25.399
to see the reaction. So long, now. Hot dog, that's

00:12:25.399 --> 00:12:27.299
five customers. Five more and I get a suit free.

00:12:27.299 --> 00:12:29.740
No, it's... Six McGee. Dr. Gamble says he's getting

00:12:29.740 --> 00:12:31.500
two suits. Oh, wonderful. Six down and four to

00:12:31.500 --> 00:12:33.059
go. Now let me see. Who else could I talk to?

00:12:33.100 --> 00:12:35.139
Well, there's no use talking to Mr. Wilcox. Huh?

00:12:35.419 --> 00:12:37.279
He's got enough clothes now to take the heart

00:12:37.279 --> 00:12:40.039
out of Schaffner and Marx. And he's just the

00:12:40.039 --> 00:12:43.740
guy to sell a new suit to. Yeah. A dude like

00:12:43.740 --> 00:12:46.559
him won't be able to resist the... Come in. Come

00:12:46.559 --> 00:12:49.860
on in, kids. Oh, hi, old timer. Hello, Mr. Blazingame.

00:12:50.120 --> 00:12:51.879
You look like you'd had a chill. You're shaking

00:12:51.879 --> 00:12:54.059
like a loose fender. Where have you been? Hey!

00:12:54.179 --> 00:12:55.669
She says, where have you... Under the river,

00:12:55.950 --> 00:12:58.649
kids! In a diver's helmet! Under the river? Yep!

00:12:59.169 --> 00:13:01.250
Believe me, it's colder in a witch's broom handle

00:13:01.250 --> 00:13:04.429
down there! What were you looking for under the

00:13:04.429 --> 00:13:06.429
river? Lose your dentures off the bridge or something?

00:13:06.649 --> 00:13:09.110
Hey! He said - Nope! Nope! Just writing a letter

00:13:09.110 --> 00:13:11.370
to my mother, kids! She lives back in Turkey,

00:13:11.509 --> 00:13:13.190
around Indiana, and I - Now wait a minute, wait

00:13:13.190 --> 00:13:14.850
a minute. That don't make sense, old -timer.

00:13:15.210 --> 00:13:17.029
Diving into the river to write a letter. Why

00:13:17.029 --> 00:13:19.110
don't it, Johnny? I got one of them pens for

00:13:19.110 --> 00:13:21.370
Christmas that writes underwater. Thought I'd

00:13:21.370 --> 00:13:24.690
try it out! He could have written a much longer

00:13:24.690 --> 00:13:26.769
letter, too. They don't have to be refilled for

00:13:26.769 --> 00:13:29.889
two years. Say, did you do any deep sea diving

00:13:29.889 --> 00:13:31.549
while you were in the sea bees, Mr. Oldtimer?

00:13:31.809 --> 00:13:33.870
Hey! Did you do any? Lots of it! Lots of it,

00:13:34.009 --> 00:13:37.009
kid! Spent so much time under the water, I got

00:13:37.009 --> 00:13:40.850
gills on my neck! Gills on your neck? Yep, gills.

00:13:41.029 --> 00:13:43.370
He was our skipper. Old Lieutenant Commander

00:13:43.370 --> 00:13:46.230
Gill. He was on my neck all the time for spending

00:13:46.230 --> 00:13:48.450
so much time under the water. What do you want

00:13:48.450 --> 00:13:50.509
to spend so much time down there for, he says.

00:13:50.610 --> 00:13:53.850
And I says, Well, sir? I says... I've been playing

00:13:53.850 --> 00:13:55.789
cribbage with a mermaid and just won a couple

00:13:55.789 --> 00:14:01.970
of fins. Well, sir, he laughs fit to bust and

00:14:01.970 --> 00:14:04.190
slaps me in the brig on bread and water for insub

00:14:04.190 --> 00:14:10.350
- for insub - but he says I was impudent. Hey,

00:14:10.409 --> 00:14:12.289
you want to buy a swell suit of civvies? Hey!

00:14:12.870 --> 00:14:15.980
Good work, kid! Gusset, next to the bomb town.

00:14:16.120 --> 00:14:19.200
110 bucks. Tell him I sent ya. Okay! After the

00:14:19.200 --> 00:14:21.440
way these calls fit, it'll be nice to get a miner's

00:14:21.440 --> 00:14:24.019
suit on again. A miner's suit? Yep! One with

00:14:24.019 --> 00:14:33.200
a little slack in the pants! Well, there's seven,

00:14:33.399 --> 00:14:35.299
McGee. You only need three more. I got Wilcox

00:14:35.299 --> 00:14:38.080
checked off. I can talk Wilcox into one. Flattery.

00:14:38.399 --> 00:14:40.240
Flattery'll do it. I'll butter him like a pre

00:14:40.240 --> 00:14:44.860
-war waffle. Then if I can get Latrivia and Wimple,

00:14:44.940 --> 00:14:46.620
I'm all set. I got a suit. You better you better

00:14:46.620 --> 00:14:48.740
make it mrs. Wimple. She wears the trousers in

00:14:48.740 --> 00:14:53.360
that family Hello No, Mr. Wilcox, do come in.

00:14:53.419 --> 00:14:55.759
Hi, Junior. I had a feeling you'd drop in sometime

00:14:55.759 --> 00:14:58.580
today. That's like having a hunch that Easter

00:14:58.580 --> 00:15:01.580
will come on a Sunday. Did you want to see me

00:15:01.580 --> 00:15:04.340
about something, pal? Yeah, how you fix pursuits?

00:15:04.419 --> 00:15:06.200
See, I'm glad you asked me that. I've noticed

00:15:06.200 --> 00:15:07.919
you were looking pretty seedy lately, but I didn't

00:15:07.919 --> 00:15:10.259
want to say anything. Come over sometime and

00:15:10.259 --> 00:15:11.980
pick out a couple, pal. They can easily be cut

00:15:11.980 --> 00:15:16.580
down to fix you. Oh! No, no, Mr. Wilcox. He didn't

00:15:16.580 --> 00:15:18.860
mean for himself. He didn't? Certainly not. I

00:15:18.860 --> 00:15:20.899
want to know if you need any. That's a silly

00:15:20.899 --> 00:15:23.340
question. Yours wouldn't fit me. Oh, I... Look,

00:15:23.519 --> 00:15:26.200
Mr. Wilcox. Nobody's talking about giving anybody

00:15:26.200 --> 00:15:28.379
any old clothes. McGee wants to know if you're

00:15:28.379 --> 00:15:30.159
thinking of buying any new suits. Yeah. Well,

00:15:30.279 --> 00:15:32.139
I'll tell you how it is, Molly. I'm always buying

00:15:32.139 --> 00:15:34.179
new clothes. Partly because I like them, and

00:15:34.179 --> 00:15:35.559
partly because I think it's a good business to

00:15:35.559 --> 00:15:37.059
dress well. Yeah, well, the reason I ask... You

00:15:37.059 --> 00:15:38.799
see, when I go into people's homes and offices

00:15:38.799 --> 00:15:41.019
as a representative of Johnson's Wax... I want

00:15:41.019 --> 00:15:43.419
especially to appear like I have a quality product

00:15:43.419 --> 00:15:45.419
to offer, which I have. Yes, but we were - You

00:15:45.419 --> 00:15:47.379
see, one of the finest homes in America used

00:15:47.379 --> 00:15:49.360
Johnson's wax on their floors and furniture and

00:15:49.360 --> 00:15:51.480
woodwork, window sills and luggage and a hundred

00:15:51.480 --> 00:15:53.840
other things. Well, it just doesn't behoove me

00:15:53.840 --> 00:15:55.659
to dress like an itinerant peddler. Yeah, but

00:15:55.659 --> 00:15:57.820
what that got to do with... See whiz pal, Johnson's

00:15:57.820 --> 00:16:00.220
Wax is known the world over as the answer to

00:16:00.220 --> 00:16:03.059
protective housekeeping. A wax surface is a surface

00:16:03.059 --> 00:16:05.379
protected against dampness and dust and wear.

00:16:05.580 --> 00:16:09.000
And it represents fine hospitality too. That

00:16:09.000 --> 00:16:11.500
film of Johnson's Wax is the largest welcome

00:16:11.500 --> 00:16:13.500
mat in the world. Yes, we know but... That's

00:16:13.500 --> 00:16:16.500
why I always like to look my best. You judge

00:16:16.500 --> 00:16:18.580
a home by its appearance and you judge a man

00:16:18.580 --> 00:16:20.820
by his appearance. That's why I'm always buying

00:16:20.820 --> 00:16:25.370
you clothes. If you think you've nailed down

00:16:25.370 --> 00:16:27.490
your paycheck for this week, Waxie, may I say

00:16:27.490 --> 00:16:32.070
a word? Just why, please do. Ah, look, Mr. Wilcox,

00:16:32.129 --> 00:16:34.230
there's a new tailor in town, a Mr. Gusset, next

00:16:34.230 --> 00:16:36.710
door to the Bontown. Makes wonderful men's suits

00:16:36.710 --> 00:16:39.830
for $110. And you're a wonderful man. You go

00:16:39.830 --> 00:16:41.210
in there and mention my name, Junior, and you'll

00:16:41.210 --> 00:16:42.970
get treated right. How about it? Just opened

00:16:42.970 --> 00:16:45.129
up, did he? Just this week. Right next to the

00:16:45.129 --> 00:16:46.889
Bontown, eh? Right next door. Gusset's the name.

00:16:46.970 --> 00:16:48.769
You gonna go see him? Bet I am, pal. Be there

00:16:48.769 --> 00:16:50.450
in half an hour. Any suits do you think you'll

00:16:50.450 --> 00:16:52.129
buy, Mr. Wilcox? Oh, I don't need any suits,

00:16:52.169 --> 00:16:54.149
but he'll need some Johnson's wax for that new

00:16:54.149 --> 00:17:04.269
shop of his. Thanks for the gift, Val. Well,

00:17:04.410 --> 00:17:06.490
ring up one, no sale, McGee. Oh, I think Wilcox

00:17:06.490 --> 00:17:08.690
will buy one. He's an actor at heart, and when

00:17:08.690 --> 00:17:10.529
he smells a bolt of flannel, it'll look like

00:17:10.529 --> 00:17:13.759
smoke to a firehose. And did I say that right?

00:17:13.900 --> 00:17:16.980
Yeah. Did you hear about him wiring Hollywood?

00:17:17.180 --> 00:17:19.000
No, about what? He wanted to try out for that

00:17:19.000 --> 00:17:20.740
new picture, the robe. Yeah? He thought it was

00:17:20.740 --> 00:17:22.240
going to be called the wardrobe and wanted the

00:17:22.240 --> 00:17:25.420
title roll. Oh. Yeah, but they said that... Come

00:17:25.420 --> 00:17:28.400
in. Well, for goodness sakes, if it isn't Mrs.

00:17:28.579 --> 00:17:30.740
Carstairs. Hello, Millicent. How do you do, my

00:17:30.740 --> 00:17:32.980
dear? Good day, Mr. McGee. Hi, Carsey. I understand

00:17:32.980 --> 00:17:35.920
you had the flu. You feel better now? Yes, thank

00:17:35.920 --> 00:17:38.339
you. My household has had quite a siege of it,

00:17:38.359 --> 00:17:40.980
you know. First Marie, my upstairs maid, had

00:17:40.980 --> 00:17:44.240
it, and then Mr. Carstairs, and then I. Well,

00:17:44.359 --> 00:17:46.579
it's hard to keep germs on one floor of a house,

00:17:46.799 --> 00:17:52.140
Millicent. Yes. Oh, Mr. Carstairs. Who took care

00:17:52.140 --> 00:17:54.539
of you, Millicent? Dr. Gamble? Oh, yes. He's

00:17:54.539 --> 00:17:56.859
a splendid physician. He treated my husband for

00:17:56.859 --> 00:18:00.880
a horse, Charlie. You mean Charlie horse? No.

00:18:01.279 --> 00:18:03.579
A horse Charlie Adams gave him that had the heave.

00:18:10.539 --> 00:18:13.099
Wait a minute, who was sick? Your husband, the

00:18:13.099 --> 00:18:15.579
horse, or Charlie Adams? I was, of the whole

00:18:15.579 --> 00:18:19.920
thing! Speaking of heaves, were you awfully sick

00:18:19.920 --> 00:18:23.119
with the flu, Millie? Oh, indeed I was, Mr. McGee

00:18:23.119 --> 00:18:25.339
The first day Mr. Costes took my temperature,

00:18:25.380 --> 00:18:27.819
I knew I was ill Oh, what did it read, Millie,

00:18:27.900 --> 00:18:31.359
since? Three degrees above freezing Three degrees

00:18:31.359 --> 00:18:35.420
above freezing? Yes Mr. Costes took my temperature,

00:18:35.460 --> 00:18:37.299
but he had to walk down to Kramer's drugstore

00:18:37.299 --> 00:18:40.539
to have the thermometer read Well, I must be

00:18:40.539 --> 00:18:50.279
going today The Kingsman and old rockin chair

00:18:50.279 --> 00:19:16.230
got me Let me here grab him at the flyers round

00:19:16.230 --> 00:19:22.329
my rocking chair. My dear old Aunt Harriet, I

00:19:22.329 --> 00:19:27.369
know that way up in heaven she be. Oh, send me

00:19:27.369 --> 00:19:31.369
down, sweet chariot, for the end of my trouble

00:19:31.369 --> 00:19:37.349
I see. Oh, rocking chair gets it. I do believe

00:19:37.349 --> 00:20:09.789
that Judgment Day is here. from this cabin, can't

00:20:09.789 --> 00:20:15.329
go nowhere. Just set me here to gravin' at the

00:20:15.329 --> 00:20:20.609
flies around my rockin' chair. My dear, I'm Harriet.

00:20:22.210 --> 00:20:28.109
In heaven she be. Send me down, sweet chariot.

00:20:28.509 --> 00:20:31.950
Good for the end of my trouble, the end of my

00:20:31.950 --> 00:20:59.789
trouble, I say. Well, how many more suits do

00:20:59.789 --> 00:21:01.329
you have to sell before you get one free for

00:21:01.329 --> 00:21:03.509
yourself, dearie? Well, let me look at my list.

00:21:03.710 --> 00:21:06.990
There's one, two, three, four, five, six, seven,

00:21:07.250 --> 00:21:09.809
eight, eight and a half. Eight and a half? Yeah.

00:21:10.360 --> 00:21:13.279
Mortoops only wanted a pair of pants. So if I

00:21:13.279 --> 00:21:15.960
can find one, who's that man or woman? Man. Bring

00:21:15.960 --> 00:21:19.099
him in quick. Come in. Oh, good day, Mayor Latrivia.

00:21:19.240 --> 00:21:21.500
Good day, Mrs. McGee. Hello, McGee. Hi, Latrivia.

00:21:21.579 --> 00:21:23.160
You're just the guy I wanted to see. If it's

00:21:23.160 --> 00:21:24.819
about our date to go bowling tonight, McGee,

00:21:24.880 --> 00:21:26.539
I can't make it. I just dropped by to tell you.

00:21:26.819 --> 00:21:28.980
Pressure of business, Mr. Mayor? Oh, you might

00:21:28.980 --> 00:21:31.140
call it that, Mrs. McGee. I am attending a Boy

00:21:31.140 --> 00:21:33.299
Scout meeting at the Eastside High School tonight.

00:21:33.539 --> 00:21:36.140
Oh. trying for your merit badge and ballot box

00:21:36.140 --> 00:21:39.799
stuffing material? McGee, it doesn't matter a

00:21:39.799 --> 00:21:42.259
jot nor a tittle to me what you think of my political

00:21:42.259 --> 00:21:44.839
activities, but I resent any inference that the

00:21:44.839 --> 00:21:47.240
Boy Scout movement tolerates anything unethical.

00:21:47.799 --> 00:21:49.640
I consider the Scout movement one of the greatest

00:21:49.640 --> 00:21:51.880
forces for good citizenship in the world today.

00:21:52.539 --> 00:21:55.700
And on this, their 36th anniversary, I think

00:21:55.700 --> 00:21:57.359
they're entitled to the respect and goodwill

00:21:57.359 --> 00:22:00.460
of everyone as boys who will grow into our leaders

00:22:00.460 --> 00:22:03.640
of tomorrow. Oh, well McGee was just kidding,

00:22:03.839 --> 00:22:05.880
Mr. Mayor. Sure, sure. Great bunch of kids, little

00:22:05.880 --> 00:22:07.779
trivia. You gonna make a speech to them tonight?

00:22:08.119 --> 00:22:09.839
Well, I'm giving them a little demonstration

00:22:09.839 --> 00:22:11.920
of the things I learned in the Coast Guard, McGee.

00:22:12.079 --> 00:22:14.339
Such as what, Mr. Mayor? Well, for instance,

00:22:14.720 --> 00:22:25.420
not tying. Not tying what? Just not tying. Well

00:22:25.420 --> 00:22:27.259
then, what's the use of going at all if you're

00:22:27.259 --> 00:22:31.740
not tying anything? But I am tying anything.

00:22:31.880 --> 00:22:37.619
Eh, something. What? Knots! Oh! Please, Mr. Meade.

00:22:40.940 --> 00:22:44.000
You're addressing a lady, La Trivia. Thank you,

00:22:44.140 --> 00:22:46.160
dearie. Well, I said nothing that would offend

00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:48.539
a lady, Meade. I merely stated that I was giving

00:22:48.539 --> 00:22:50.359
a demonstration of knot tying. You mean you're

00:22:50.359 --> 00:22:53.799
not giving a demonstration of tying? Yes. No!

00:22:54.259 --> 00:22:57.380
Don't be silly. Look, in the Coast Guard, I learned

00:22:57.380 --> 00:22:59.720
a great deal about tying knots. Square knots,

00:22:59.940 --> 00:23:02.579
bowlands, berries, hitches, sheep shanks, turks

00:23:02.579 --> 00:23:05.839
heads, monkey fists, grannies. Who's? Grannies.

00:23:06.119 --> 00:23:11.380
My gosh, was she in the Coast Guard too? I used

00:23:11.380 --> 00:23:12.920
to think that'd be a pretty hard life for an

00:23:12.920 --> 00:23:16.920
old lady. I was speaking of a granny knot. Oh,

00:23:17.299 --> 00:23:19.839
yeah, I see. Knot was your mother's maiden name.

00:23:22.640 --> 00:23:25.740
It was not. That's what she said, it was not.

00:23:27.000 --> 00:23:36.160
I mean it was not, not. Who's there? Uh, Arthur

00:23:36.160 --> 00:23:39.880
Arthur who? Arthur, any more routines like this

00:23:39.880 --> 00:23:52.619
coming up? If so, include me out! Oh, you forgot

00:23:52.619 --> 00:23:54.720
to ask him about getting fitted for a new suit,

00:23:54.900 --> 00:23:56.619
didn't you? The only fit he was ready for was

00:23:56.619 --> 00:24:00.490
to be tied Now I can get another couple of customers

00:24:00.490 --> 00:24:02.569
someplace. Hand me that phone. I'll resume my

00:24:02.569 --> 00:24:06.390
campaign. Here. Thanks. Hello, operator. Give

00:24:06.390 --> 00:24:09.450
me a whistle, Mr. 7654, the love of Mike. Is

00:24:09.450 --> 00:24:13.009
that you, Mert? How's every little thing, Mert?

00:24:13.309 --> 00:24:18.130
Fizzy. What's that, Mert? He did? Oh, gee, I'm

00:24:18.130 --> 00:24:21.210
sorry, Mert. Cut his tail right off, huh? Oh,

00:24:21.369 --> 00:24:23.809
how awful. Her dog, McGee? No, no, her uncle.

00:24:24.830 --> 00:24:26.490
He was telling her a story over the phone and

00:24:26.490 --> 00:24:35.730
got disconnected. What's the name, Ernst? Okay,

00:24:35.890 --> 00:24:38.809
connect me. Hello, is this Eddie? This is River

00:24:38.809 --> 00:24:40.930
McGee, Eddie. Look, I got a great idea if you

00:24:40.930 --> 00:24:43.170
need a new suit, Eddie. There's a new tailor...

00:25:02.100 --> 00:25:05.240
Okay. Okay, Bert. You just go in and tell Gus

00:25:05.240 --> 00:25:08.319
that I sent you. Don't mention it, Bert. Goodbye.

00:25:09.539 --> 00:25:12.319
Oh boy, am I tired. This is my arm ache. I must

00:25:12.319 --> 00:25:15.200
have made 40 calls. But I done it, Molly. I done

00:25:15.200 --> 00:25:18.279
it. I got ten guys to buy new suits. Well, that's

00:25:18.279 --> 00:25:20.240
fine, dearie. Yeah. But why are you sitting around

00:25:20.240 --> 00:25:23.039
in your bathrobe? Oh, I sent my old suit to the

00:25:23.039 --> 00:25:25.180
relief collection. It was looking so shabby,

00:25:25.220 --> 00:25:26.859
I hated even to talk to people over the phone

00:25:26.859 --> 00:25:30.420
in it. I got nothing to do for a couple of days

00:25:30.420 --> 00:25:32.359
anyway, and by that time I'll have my new suit.

00:25:32.660 --> 00:25:34.960
Oh, will he deliver it? Oh my gosh, he better

00:25:34.960 --> 00:25:37.240
after me sending him all that business, spending

00:25:37.240 --> 00:25:39.539
all that time. I'll call him up and see. I'll

00:25:39.539 --> 00:25:41.380
do it, McGee. You've been on the phone all afternoon.

00:25:41.740 --> 00:25:43.779
You just sit down and relax. Yeah, I am tired.

00:25:44.420 --> 00:25:47.980
Thanks. Hello, operator. Whistle Vista 1247,

00:25:48.079 --> 00:25:51.599
please. Yeah, that's a number. Hello, Mr. Gusset.

00:25:51.880 --> 00:25:54.359
Mrs. McGee speaking. Ah, he's there. Mr. McGee

00:25:54.359 --> 00:25:56.019
wants to know how soon his suit will be ready.

00:25:56.579 --> 00:26:01.890
Yeah. Yeah? Huh? What? Oh, that's all right,

00:26:01.950 --> 00:26:04.549
Mr. Gusset. He was glad to do it. He said to

00:26:04.549 --> 00:26:06.069
thank you for sending him all those customers,

00:26:06.230 --> 00:26:07.910
dear. When did he say mine would be ready? When

00:26:07.910 --> 00:26:09.609
did you say Mr. McGee's suit would be ready,

00:26:09.650 --> 00:26:14.089
Mr. Gusset? March 1st. March 1st? Yes, he said

00:26:14.089 --> 00:26:15.809
you'd send him so much business, he was terribly

00:26:15.809 --> 00:26:18.529
busy. Oh. And naturally, the paying customers

00:26:18.529 --> 00:26:21.789
come first. Yeah, well, I guess that's reasonable

00:26:21.789 --> 00:26:28.490
too. March 1st, eh? Yes. 1947. What? Oh boy,

00:26:28.710 --> 00:26:31.309
oh boy, a whole year. Now I can finish Anthony

00:26:31.309 --> 00:26:40.430
Adverse. I'll bet you can think of many products

00:26:40.430 --> 00:26:42.730
you insist on using just because they are superior.

00:26:43.089 --> 00:26:44.750
Johnson's glow coat, for example. More women

00:26:44.750 --> 00:26:46.630
use glow coat on their kitchen linoleum floors

00:26:46.630 --> 00:26:49.150
than any other self -polishing wax. They agree

00:26:49.150 --> 00:26:51.329
that its extra toughness guards linoleum better

00:26:51.329 --> 00:26:53.680
against wear, dirt, and spill things. so that

00:26:53.680 --> 00:26:55.519
its bright colors and attractive patterns stay

00:26:55.519 --> 00:26:57.980
new looking longer. If you've never tried this

00:26:57.980 --> 00:27:00.660
most popular of all wax floor polishes, you'll

00:27:00.660 --> 00:27:03.259
find Glow Coat astonishingly easy to use. There's

00:27:03.259 --> 00:27:05.099
no rubbing or buffing at all. Just spread it

00:27:05.099 --> 00:27:06.839
around on the floor, let it dry, and your work

00:27:06.839 --> 00:27:09.660
is done. Glow Coat shines as it dries. In only

00:27:09.660 --> 00:27:11.460
20 minutes, your floors are ready to use and

00:27:11.460 --> 00:27:13.700
amazingly clean and sparkling, never streaked

00:27:13.700 --> 00:27:16.500
or uneven. For greater floor beauty and greater

00:27:16.500 --> 00:27:19.140
floor protection, be sure to ask for Glow Coat.

00:27:19.319 --> 00:27:33.039
Johnson Self -Polishing Glow Coat. Did you hear

00:27:33.039 --> 00:27:34.759
a call for an ambulance? Oh, yeah, I did, Bud.

00:27:35.000 --> 00:27:36.599
Take me down to Gussett's tailor shop, will you?

00:27:36.619 --> 00:27:38.180
Next door to the bond town. What is this, Mickey?

00:27:38.180 --> 00:27:39.980
Why the ambulance? Well, all I got to wear is

00:27:39.980 --> 00:27:41.940
a bathrobe. I'd look kind of funny on the streetcar.

00:27:42.259 --> 00:27:43.619
I thought you said somebody was going to the

00:27:43.619 --> 00:27:45.759
hospital. Somebody is. A guy by the name of Gussett.

00:27:45.880 --> 00:27:48.000
I'll see you later, Molly. Good night. Good night.

00:27:52.640 --> 00:27:54.380
This is Harlow Wilcox, speaking for the makers

00:27:54.380 --> 00:27:56.240
of Johnson's Watch Products for Home and Industry,

00:27:56.359 --> 00:27:58.059
inviting you all to be with us again next Tuesday

00:27:58.059 --> 00:28:01.039
night. Good night. This is NBC, the national

00:28:01.039 --> 00:28:03.299
broadcasting company. Oh
