Do you know someone that has an addiction, alcohol,
drugs, eating disorder, and they were doing so
well, and then they fell off the wagon? How do
you keep from falling into temptation? How do
we keep from falling into the very thing that
we know we don't want to do, but find ourselves
repeatedly failing? The answer to that is today.
Thanks for listening to this weekend edition
of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We are
an international teaching and discipleship ministry
motivating Christians to live like Christians.
Well, this past week we wrapped up Chip's series,
Balancing Life's Demands. We hope Chip's words
challenged you to refocus and reprioritize your
life on what matters most. And to help others
experience a more joyful and peaceful life, take
a minute after the message and share it with
someone. You can do that through the Chip Ingram
app or wherever you listen to podcasts. Thanks
for passing on what you're learning through this
series. Right now, we're revisiting the second
half of Chip's talk, How to Keep First Things
First. I hope you have your Bible and notes ready
as we settle in for this message. How can some
of the most committed, gifted people in all the
body of Christ, both in Bible times and our times,
how in the world can you get off track? And hopefully
in your heart of hearts, you're saying, I don't
ever want to get off track and I don't know how
I could get off track. But gosh, if Paul thinks
he could get off track and of all those people,
the nation of Israel got off track and some people
that were my heroes got off track, I guess I
could. But how? I mean, what happens? You and
I underestimate the power of our own sinful passions.
Paul will pick up the story after reaching in
and giving us his spiritual view of those children
of Israel, then he, in verse 6 through 11, he
explains, now these things happened as examples
or a type for us, those things he just talked
about, that we should not crave evil things as
they craved, and do not be idolaters as some
of them were, as it is written, the people sat
down to eat and drink and stood up to play, nor
let us act immorally as some of them did. And
23 ,000 fell in one day. Nor let us try the Lord
or test the Lord as some of them did and were
destroyed by the serpents. Nor grumble as some
of them did and were destroyed by the destroyer.
Now these things happen to them as, notice the
repetition, an example and they are written for
our instruction upon which the ends of the ages
have come. I want you to circle the word example.
First line. and in the last. And once you realize,
his point is, I'm making the example. Now, if
we had a lot more time, and for some of you that
really love to do Bible study, did you notice
a lot of these phrases? He is, I mean, he's pulling
out the whole big stories of the Old Testament,
right? And so here, let me do some quick Bible
study with you. Just, okay, I want you to put
a line under crave evil things. It was, what
he's saying is, There are passions. In fact,
it's an intensive form. There's a word for cravings
or lust or passions. This has a prefix. It's
an intensified form. So he's saying they had
supercharged lusts and passions and drives that
they fulfilled outside of God's plan. And then
he goes on to say, put a box around the word
idolaters. At the heart, always at the heart.
of us falling away from the living God is we
make someone or something the idol or the God
in his place. And guess what? It can be your
mate. Are you ready? It can be your ministry.
Yes, it can be your money. It can be a car. It
can be another woman, another man. But anything
or anyone that takes the rightful place of your
loyalty and allegiance is an idol. He's saying,
We have passions, we have drives, we're tempted
in the world to satisfy them in different ways.
And so what's he say? He says, they come out
as idolaters as some of them did. Then notice
he's going to, I'm gonna ask you to put a, gosh,
have we done lines? We've done boxes. Let me
give you three more boxes because I don't know
whether we ought to do lines, circles or boxes.
But when he says, nor let us act immorally, would
put a box around, act immorally. That's the lust
of the flesh. Skip down and put, it's hard to
put a box around, Try or test the Lord. He's
talking about the story of the envy of Moses.
That's the lust of the eyes. And then put a box
around the word grumble. That's the pride of
life. We want that power. And all I'm telling
you is this is just so basic, and he's given
us this picture. He says... You constantly underestimate
the power of your own sinful passions. But it's
an amazing thing is when we know there's going
to be, my behavior is going to be brought into
the light, it really helps me not go into the
darkness. I mean, when you know, and you're not
gonna pretend, you're not gonna fake it. And
so all I'm saying is, you know what? I'm trying
to persuade you. Are you starting to get persuaded?
I'm trying to tell you that you can't live without
this. Well, I don't care what new, Lines that
you say, I, you know what? I'm gonna put first
things first. I'm gonna develop that discipline.
It's gonna be in this area and that area and
I'm gonna honor God. I implore you to say, who
is gonna go there with me? What group of guys
can I do this with? What group of women as a
woman can I do this with? And in cases, what
set of couples could we dream some dreams together
in inappropriate ways, be very honest. The fourth
reason. It's because we constantly overestimate
our ability to handle temptation. We underestimate
the power of our passions or our sinful passions,
and we overestimate our ability to handle temptation.
What's Paul say? He applies this passage. You
might jot down Hebrews 3 .13. It's one of my
favorite passages. It says, be hardened by the
deceitfulness of sin. You know, the word deceitful
means you don't know, you don't get it. And notice
it's about your heart. It always starts there.
Your heart gets hardened. In fact, Jesus said
that is the core reason for divorce. He says
men's hearts, women's hearts, they get hardened.
And that's why we're to be tenderhearted, forgiving
one another, just as God in Christ also has forgiven
us. But I encourage, get that? But encourage
one another. And encouragement isn't like high
-fiving. Oh, you're wonderful. I'm wonderful.
Isn't life happy? This word is that parakaleo.
It's translated in some places as the word for
the Holy Spirit. It's one who comes alongside.
Encouragement is you come alongside another person,
and sometimes it means you tell them really hard
stuff. Sometimes it just means you listen and
support, and sometimes you just say, I'm so proud
of you. But it's doing life together. It's caring.
I just... I just want in my heart and mind to
just sort of say to myself, Chip, on any given
day, in the exact right circumstances, you are
capable of sin beyond your wildest imagination.
So you need to make pre -decisions about where
you'll go and what you'll do and who you'll hang
with. And you need to have a group of people
that... you can surround yourself with that love
you, that you invite into your life and say,
you know what? Here's my heart, here's my life,
here's my motives, here's my struggles. This
is what I'm going through in my life. Where are
you going? And if you don't have that, you'll
start faking it. And you'll have these temptations
and you'll have thoughts. And you'll feel like,
well, I can't. Well, actually, it leads to the
very next and last reason. The fifth reason that
we need biblical accountability is we naively
believe our struggles and temptations are unique.
See, I need it because I think, I mean, well,
whether I like it or not, I've been a pastor
for like 25 years, and people view me as a Christian
leader, so I guess I'm a Christian leader, and
then I have this profile, Christian leaders.
I bet they never struggle with this, and I guess
now I'm a Christian leader, so if I ever struggle
with that, something must be wrong with me. I'm
a man. And you're a man or a woman or a student.
And no temptation has ever taken me or ever taken
you, but what is common to man. But God will,
with the temptation, provide a way of escape
that you might be able to endure it. You're listening
to Living on the Edge. We'll get back to Chip's
message in just a minute. But first, if you're
in a small group and are looking for what to
study next, consider the Balancing Life's Demand
small group. The resource for this series will
help you realign your priorities and experience
a more joy -filled life. Stick around after the
teaching for complete details. But for now, here
again is Chip. One time someone said, you know,
I don't know how you do it, Chip, because sometimes
when you talk, I feel like you're just talking
to me, like you're reading my mind. This verse
is my preaching verse. Now, this may sound crazy,
but any area I've ever struggled with in my life,
I make this assumption. So does everybody else.
And then it's like, I'm not, you know, I've told
you I'm insecure, just like everybody else in
this room. I'm not overly vulnerable. I'm just
thinking to myself, let's see, if every guy I've
ever met, apart from the comatose guy, struggle
with lust at some level. Every woman I've ever
met at some level struggles with self -image.
Okay, everyone gets overextended. I mean, everyone
has unresolved anger issues in your marriage.
Everyone has, some season in your marriage, you
have problems with communication, sex, in -laws,
and kids, right? I mean, duh. So I don't think,
it's not like, oh. I mean, you know, when you
start talking about a few of those things, you're
like, oh gosh, what's wrong with him? You know,
what I get is, eh, he's one of us, you know.
Temptation is not the same thing as sin. Temptation
means there's an opportunity to be lured away
in some way. You know, looking at a very attractive
woman and going, wow, very attractive is not
the same as lusting for her. And you know, as
a mature believer, I can say, Lord, man, I...
Sunsets are beautiful and the trees are beautiful.
She's beautiful. And that's look number one.
Now I want to thank you for what you made beautiful
for me, Teresa. Because we naively believe our
struggles and temptations are unique, we start
to hide the ones that we think we're too mature
or we shouldn't have. And I just want to go back
to secrecy. is where the enemy will bombard you
with doubts and struggles and condemnation. You
know what? When you have a struggle, let me tell
you what the Spirit does. It's specific. It's
sin, righteousness, judgment. Repent, because
I love you. Condemnation is vague. You're a terrible
person. You know, you're a lousy this, you're
a lousy that. You know why God put you on this.
It's general. It's vague. Condemnation makes
you not like you, not like God, and not want
to pray. Conviction is a light shining on something
that needs to be addressed, and you lift it into
the light. And just like bacteria out of the
darkness, when the light hits the bacteria, and
so that the fellowship can be restored. If you
confess, agree with God about your sins, he's
faithful. And just to what? forgive, release
you of all your sins and cleanse you of all unrighteousness.
What's he say about this biblical accountability?
He says, what's the summary? Therefore, my beloved,
flee from idolatry. See, at the heart of it,
at the heart of it all is that I end up me worshiping
me. It's really not about the sex. It's about
the ego. It's really not about the food. It's
about the ego. It's not about the business and
the work. It's about the ego. At the end of the
day, the core of sin is gonna come back to in
any and all of these is God gets taken off the
throne, my way, my control, my agenda, a world
system, lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes,
pride of life, promising me security, significance,
value, and worth. Apart from God, I bite on the
bait. I make an idol. And then Paul says, and
if I happen that, I get disqualified. Disqualified
for my relationship of eternal life? No. Disqualified
as a useful vessel of honor and disqualified
not only of use by God, but bringing incredible,
incredible pain in the lives of others. There's
no such thing as private sins. Every sin I commit,
every sin you commit has ripples. Some of them
you may never see, but they have ripples. Even
the ones that no one else has found out about,
they have ripples. So I've given you five reasons
to say, dear God, I not only want, I am committed
to having biblical accountability in my life.
I mean, Paul needed it. I need it. 1 Corinthians
10 outlines clearly we all need it. How do you
get it? How does it work? Let me give you some
practical, I guess I call them spiritual tips
on getting there. Number one, it begins at home.
When we talk about accountability too often,
we jump into places outside. Start with the people
that you live with. I think there's appropriate
things as men better off to share with men and
women with women. I'm very super open with my
wife, but there are certain things that, you
know what? My wife is not a man. She doesn't
really understand. And I need some guys that
I can share that with and her vice versa. But
I think you got to start in your home, your marriage
partner or your roommates. Second, it's an atmosphere
of love, tender, compassionate, someone who's
rooting for you. Third, it must be voluntary
and by permission. By the way, I think this is
one you need to really negotiate. It is really
hard. Some of you are in these sort of semi -imbalanced
kind of relationships. And, you know, you're
the wife and you're in the Bible and you love
God and you're going to church and your husband's
sort of, you know, not so close. And, you know,
it's like as he gets up, here's a Bible passage
opened and here's a CD by so -and -so. And by
the way, honey, I'll pick up your favorite meal
if you just go to church with us. And just forget
that jazz. Let God work. You let your chaste
behavior and how you live say, I'll tell you
what, if this love in Jesus makes you love me
the way you love me, then honey, you just keep
going to church and I might even check it out.
Let God and vice versa. So, you know, it's got
to be by permission. We don't go out and hold
other people accountable. Four, it must be specific,
not generic. I mean, this sort of, hey, why don't
you meet? We all have coffee. And so, how are
you doing in general? I'm doing pretty good in
general. How are you doing in general? I'm doing
pretty good in general. So, what do you think
of those Falcons? In our place, they actually
won a game. Amen. Or, hey, you think the Cardinals
are, you know, going to be any good this year?
That quarterback change? Or, I don't know. Have
you seen the last of Southern Living Magazine?
I thought it was so cute the way that, you know.
And isn't it good to be in these accountability
groups? It just makes me feel warm all over.
You know? And we kid ourselves thinking that
something's happening. It needs to be specific.
You might even put some things in writing and
say, you know what, as we meet together, these
are the things we want to cover. I have a fellow,
he's that dad figure, and I'll never forget,
I was in Dallas, and he has permission, and we
talk on a regular basis, and he's real funny.
He has a flat top and kind of looks at me like
this, and he said, oh! Okay, why are we waiting
on our food? Are you ready? And, you know, it's
like a game show or something. I said, AC, man,
what are you doing? He goes, well, are you ready?
So, yeah, he takes his wallet and he has this
little laminated thing and real small print and
his questions. Question number one. Have you
any time since we last met been on the internet
and watched anything inappropriate? Question
number two. And, I mean, he goes through my thought
life, my... time, my money, my ego. And then
the last question after is like five basic areas.
He goes, question number six, have you lied to
me on questions one through five? And you know
what? He knows me and he's kind of goofy. He
knew it'd be uncomfortable. He knew it'd be the
kind of thing that, you know, it's always awkward.
But guess what? I got a safe place to go. Anybody
ask you those questions? You asking anybody those
questions? According to this passage, until the
day you take your last breath and I take my last
breath, there'll be struggles in those areas,
right? So it needs to be specific. And by the
way, every time it doesn't need to be like hardcore,
all right, you know? But you build relationship
and you build trust, but we're gonna be specific
about some things. My rule of thumb is no more
than four people unless there's unique relationships
of closeness that allow for more. And I think
two is not great because we start getting blind
spots for one another. I mean, it's okay. I think
mentoring relationships are great, but for accountability,
there's something healthy about having someone
listen to stuff and say, because what you do
is you're vulnerable when you're really being
open and you only have one set of eyes looking
at what's going on. I want a couple set of eyes.
So I have kind of relationships with a handful
of people like this. The conclusion, making sincere
commitments is tough. Keeping them is next to
impossible. Alone. There's hope. Many start well.
Few finish well. You can be the exception. You
can be the exception. You're listening to Living
on the Edge with Chip Ingram. And the message
you just heard, how to keep first things first,
is from our series, Balancing Life's Demands.
Chip will join us in studio to share some insights
from today's talk in just a minute. Are you exhausted
juggling your job, kids, marriage, and everything
else you're responsible for? Do you wish there
was a way to relieve that stress and live with
a little more joy? Well, in this series, Chip
reveals what a balanced life looks like and how
you can rearrange your priorities around what
matters most. Hear how to experience the joy
-filled and satisfying life God desires for you
to have. Now, if you've missed any part of Chip's
teaching, catch up anytime on the Chip Ingram
app. Well, Chip's here in studio now to talk
about a resource we have that complements our
current series. Thanks, Dave. You know, in today's
world, it's easy to get pulled in a million different
directions. Work, family, church, kids' activities,
and everything in between. And while all of these
can be good things, they leave you feeling depleted,
drained, and often not connected to the people
that you love the most. Let me tell you something.
That is not God's will or God's plan for your
life. And we have a resource specifically designed
to help you cut through the chaos and discover
God's priorities for you and your family. Balancing
Life's Demands is a small group study that will
help you determine your should -dos in Christ
from the could -dos that will steal your joy.
If you want to get out from under the pressure
and enjoy the life that God has in store for
you, Balancing Life's Demands is the perfect
tool. That's absolutely right, Chip. Well, to
get your hands on this small group study, go
to livingontheedge .org or call us at 888 -333
-6003. I think you'll be blown away by how this
resource will declutter your day -to -day, prioritize
what matters most, and lead you to a more peace
-filled life. To order the Balancing Life's Demand
small group, visit livingontheedge .org. or call
888 -333 -6003. App listeners tap special offers.
As we close today's program, we've talked about
the five specific reasons in the last two broadcasts
of why we need accountable relationships. And
then we have defined, and I think this definition
is really important. Accountability is not other
people playing the Holy Spirit and nagging my
life. Accountability is me inviting. trusted
people into my life to help me keep my commitments
to God. Now, here's the other thing. There's
a lot of, quote, accountability groups, all kind
of small groups. But I will tell you, my experience
has been that there's a big problem in these
groups. It's called lying, okay? I'm dead serious.
I have been in accountability groups and have
good friends in accountability groups that people
who... Walked off with someone else's mate. People
who have been involved in fraud at significant
levels were in that accountability group. I think
it's so important that we create an atmosphere
where we really accept one another for who we
are and the struggles that we have. But it's
also an atmosphere where there's some tough love
that goes on. You know, so often I think in the
name of caring for one another, loving one another.
I've been in groups where, you know, someone
shows up seven, eight weeks in a row, doesn't
do the lesson, doesn't memorize the passage,
doesn't be very authentic. And everyone just
keeps giving them a pass like, well, you know,
we're Christians. We don't want to be too hard
on him. Guess what? Sometimes you need to be
hard on people that you love. All discipline.
the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful.
Yet those who've been trained by it, afterwards
it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.
I can look back at four or five major times in
my life where people said things to me that I
wanted to get up and hit them. I mean, I can't
believe they said that. And the reason I wanted
to get up and hit them was because they were
absolutely right. When you find people defensive,
And rationalizing, I will tell you, underneath
that is unknown, unresolved patterns of sin that
need to be addressed. Let's really love each
other and stop playing games. Let's be Romans
12 Christians from the inside out. Great challenge,
Chip. In fact, we'd like to help you become a
more dedicated follower of Jesus. So check out
Chip's broadcast series, True Spirituality. As
you walk through Romans chapter 12 with Chip,
you'll uncover the profile of an authentic disciple.
To listen to this series, True Spirituality,
go to special offers at livingontheedge .org
or through the Chip Ingram app. You've been listening
to a selected program that we wanted to share
from this past week. To hear more from Chip's
series, Balancing Life's Demands, go to livingontheedge
.org or wherever you listen to podcasts. Until
next time, I'm Dave Drewy saying thanks for listening
to this weekend edition of Living on the Edge.