WEBVTT 00:00:11.400 --> 00:00:14.679 Do you know someone that has an addiction, alcohol, 00:00:15.099 --> 00:00:18.620 drugs, eating disorder, and they were doing so 00:00:18.620 --> 00:00:23.359 well, and then they fell off the wagon? How do 00:00:23.359 --> 00:00:26.199 you keep from falling into temptation? How do 00:00:26.199 --> 00:00:28.980 we keep from falling into the very thing that 00:00:28.980 --> 00:00:32.280 we know we don't want to do, but find ourselves 00:00:32.280 --> 00:00:35.799 repeatedly failing? The answer to that is today. 00:00:40.780 --> 00:00:42.840 Thanks for listening to this weekend edition 00:00:42.840 --> 00:00:46.060 of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. We are 00:00:46.060 --> 00:00:48.560 an international teaching and discipleship ministry 00:00:48.560 --> 00:00:51.299 motivating Christians to live like Christians. 00:00:51.640 --> 00:00:54.079 Well, this past week we wrapped up Chip's series, 00:00:54.179 --> 00:00:56.859 Balancing Life's Demands. We hope Chip's words 00:00:56.859 --> 00:00:59.700 challenged you to refocus and reprioritize your 00:00:59.700 --> 00:01:02.520 life on what matters most. And to help others 00:01:02.520 --> 00:01:05.359 experience a more joyful and peaceful life, take 00:01:05.359 --> 00:01:07.439 a minute after the message and share it with 00:01:07.439 --> 00:01:09.909 someone. You can do that through the Chip Ingram 00:01:09.909 --> 00:01:12.950 app or wherever you listen to podcasts. Thanks 00:01:12.950 --> 00:01:15.010 for passing on what you're learning through this 00:01:15.010 --> 00:01:17.709 series. Right now, we're revisiting the second 00:01:17.709 --> 00:01:20.150 half of Chip's talk, How to Keep First Things 00:01:20.150 --> 00:01:22.569 First. I hope you have your Bible and notes ready 00:01:22.569 --> 00:01:26.689 as we settle in for this message. How can some 00:01:26.689 --> 00:01:29.829 of the most committed, gifted people in all the 00:01:29.829 --> 00:01:32.810 body of Christ, both in Bible times and our times, 00:01:32.930 --> 00:01:36.579 how in the world can you get off track? And hopefully 00:01:36.579 --> 00:01:39.859 in your heart of hearts, you're saying, I don't 00:01:39.859 --> 00:01:41.459 ever want to get off track and I don't know how 00:01:41.459 --> 00:01:43.780 I could get off track. But gosh, if Paul thinks 00:01:43.780 --> 00:01:45.959 he could get off track and of all those people, 00:01:46.140 --> 00:01:48.420 the nation of Israel got off track and some people 00:01:48.420 --> 00:01:50.219 that were my heroes got off track, I guess I 00:01:50.219 --> 00:01:55.079 could. But how? I mean, what happens? You and 00:01:55.079 --> 00:01:58.879 I underestimate the power of our own sinful passions. 00:01:59.239 --> 00:02:02.200 Paul will pick up the story after reaching in 00:02:02.200 --> 00:02:05.700 and giving us his spiritual view of those children 00:02:05.700 --> 00:02:08.960 of Israel, then he, in verse 6 through 11, he 00:02:08.960 --> 00:02:12.439 explains, now these things happened as examples 00:02:12.439 --> 00:02:17.560 or a type for us, those things he just talked 00:02:17.560 --> 00:02:21.000 about, that we should not crave evil things as 00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:24.919 they craved, and do not be idolaters as some 00:02:24.919 --> 00:02:26.400 of them were, as it is written, the people sat 00:02:26.400 --> 00:02:29.300 down to eat and drink and stood up to play, nor 00:02:29.300 --> 00:02:32.860 let us act immorally as some of them did. And 00:02:32.860 --> 00:02:36.539 23 ,000 fell in one day. Nor let us try the Lord 00:02:36.539 --> 00:02:39.000 or test the Lord as some of them did and were 00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.780 destroyed by the serpents. Nor grumble as some 00:02:41.780 --> 00:02:44.340 of them did and were destroyed by the destroyer. 00:02:44.719 --> 00:02:47.939 Now these things happen to them as, notice the 00:02:47.939 --> 00:02:51.580 repetition, an example and they are written for 00:02:51.580 --> 00:02:56.319 our instruction upon which the ends of the ages 00:02:56.319 --> 00:03:00.039 have come. I want you to circle the word example. 00:03:00.060 --> 00:03:03.240 First line. and in the last. And once you realize, 00:03:03.439 --> 00:03:06.060 his point is, I'm making the example. Now, if 00:03:06.060 --> 00:03:08.159 we had a lot more time, and for some of you that 00:03:08.159 --> 00:03:10.780 really love to do Bible study, did you notice 00:03:10.780 --> 00:03:13.020 a lot of these phrases? He is, I mean, he's pulling 00:03:13.020 --> 00:03:14.780 out the whole big stories of the Old Testament, 00:03:14.879 --> 00:03:18.139 right? And so here, let me do some quick Bible 00:03:18.139 --> 00:03:20.800 study with you. Just, okay, I want you to put 00:03:20.800 --> 00:03:25.919 a line under crave evil things. It was, what 00:03:25.919 --> 00:03:29.590 he's saying is, There are passions. In fact, 00:03:29.629 --> 00:03:33.229 it's an intensive form. There's a word for cravings 00:03:33.229 --> 00:03:36.210 or lust or passions. This has a prefix. It's 00:03:36.210 --> 00:03:38.909 an intensified form. So he's saying they had 00:03:38.909 --> 00:03:43.550 supercharged lusts and passions and drives that 00:03:43.550 --> 00:03:49.250 they fulfilled outside of God's plan. And then 00:03:49.250 --> 00:03:51.530 he goes on to say, put a box around the word 00:03:51.530 --> 00:03:55.569 idolaters. At the heart, always at the heart. 00:03:56.169 --> 00:03:59.009 of us falling away from the living God is we 00:03:59.009 --> 00:04:02.789 make someone or something the idol or the God 00:04:02.789 --> 00:04:05.569 in his place. And guess what? It can be your 00:04:05.569 --> 00:04:08.550 mate. Are you ready? It can be your ministry. 00:04:08.949 --> 00:04:11.770 Yes, it can be your money. It can be a car. It 00:04:11.770 --> 00:04:14.789 can be another woman, another man. But anything 00:04:14.789 --> 00:04:18.189 or anyone that takes the rightful place of your 00:04:18.189 --> 00:04:21.209 loyalty and allegiance is an idol. He's saying, 00:04:21.680 --> 00:04:24.399 We have passions, we have drives, we're tempted 00:04:24.399 --> 00:04:26.339 in the world to satisfy them in different ways. 00:04:26.480 --> 00:04:28.480 And so what's he say? He says, they come out 00:04:28.480 --> 00:04:31.819 as idolaters as some of them did. Then notice 00:04:31.819 --> 00:04:34.199 he's going to, I'm gonna ask you to put a, gosh, 00:04:34.259 --> 00:04:37.420 have we done lines? We've done boxes. Let me 00:04:37.420 --> 00:04:38.720 give you three more boxes because I don't know 00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:40.220 whether we ought to do lines, circles or boxes. 00:04:40.560 --> 00:04:43.259 But when he says, nor let us act immorally, would 00:04:43.259 --> 00:04:46.939 put a box around, act immorally. That's the lust 00:04:46.939 --> 00:04:50.540 of the flesh. Skip down and put, it's hard to 00:04:50.540 --> 00:04:55.250 put a box around, Try or test the Lord. He's 00:04:55.250 --> 00:04:57.089 talking about the story of the envy of Moses. 00:04:57.870 --> 00:05:00.350 That's the lust of the eyes. And then put a box 00:05:00.350 --> 00:05:03.329 around the word grumble. That's the pride of 00:05:03.329 --> 00:05:07.250 life. We want that power. And all I'm telling 00:05:07.250 --> 00:05:10.269 you is this is just so basic, and he's given 00:05:10.269 --> 00:05:13.629 us this picture. He says... You constantly underestimate 00:05:13.629 --> 00:05:17.189 the power of your own sinful passions. But it's 00:05:17.189 --> 00:05:20.009 an amazing thing is when we know there's going 00:05:20.009 --> 00:05:22.029 to be, my behavior is going to be brought into 00:05:22.029 --> 00:05:24.730 the light, it really helps me not go into the 00:05:24.730 --> 00:05:30.209 darkness. I mean, when you know, and you're not 00:05:30.209 --> 00:05:31.949 gonna pretend, you're not gonna fake it. And 00:05:31.949 --> 00:05:34.129 so all I'm saying is, you know what? I'm trying 00:05:34.129 --> 00:05:35.970 to persuade you. Are you starting to get persuaded? 00:05:36.610 --> 00:05:38.949 I'm trying to tell you that you can't live without 00:05:38.949 --> 00:05:43.139 this. Well, I don't care what new, Lines that 00:05:43.139 --> 00:05:45.459 you say, I, you know what? I'm gonna put first 00:05:45.459 --> 00:05:47.240 things first. I'm gonna develop that discipline. 00:05:47.399 --> 00:05:48.879 It's gonna be in this area and that area and 00:05:48.879 --> 00:05:53.220 I'm gonna honor God. I implore you to say, who 00:05:53.220 --> 00:05:56.639 is gonna go there with me? What group of guys 00:05:56.639 --> 00:05:58.819 can I do this with? What group of women as a 00:05:58.819 --> 00:06:01.220 woman can I do this with? And in cases, what 00:06:01.220 --> 00:06:04.160 set of couples could we dream some dreams together 00:06:04.160 --> 00:06:07.360 in inappropriate ways, be very honest. The fourth 00:06:07.360 --> 00:06:10.420 reason. It's because we constantly overestimate 00:06:10.420 --> 00:06:13.639 our ability to handle temptation. We underestimate 00:06:13.639 --> 00:06:15.939 the power of our passions or our sinful passions, 00:06:16.139 --> 00:06:19.620 and we overestimate our ability to handle temptation. 00:06:21.139 --> 00:06:25.040 What's Paul say? He applies this passage. You 00:06:25.040 --> 00:06:30.860 might jot down Hebrews 3 .13. It's one of my 00:06:30.860 --> 00:06:39.480 favorite passages. It says, be hardened by the 00:06:39.480 --> 00:06:43.540 deceitfulness of sin. You know, the word deceitful 00:06:43.540 --> 00:06:47.819 means you don't know, you don't get it. And notice 00:06:47.819 --> 00:06:49.720 it's about your heart. It always starts there. 00:06:49.779 --> 00:06:53.279 Your heart gets hardened. In fact, Jesus said 00:06:53.279 --> 00:06:57.019 that is the core reason for divorce. He says 00:06:57.019 --> 00:07:00.319 men's hearts, women's hearts, they get hardened. 00:07:01.420 --> 00:07:04.480 And that's why we're to be tenderhearted, forgiving 00:07:04.480 --> 00:07:06.579 one another, just as God in Christ also has forgiven 00:07:06.579 --> 00:07:10.639 us. But I encourage, get that? But encourage 00:07:10.639 --> 00:07:13.420 one another. And encouragement isn't like high 00:07:13.420 --> 00:07:15.120 -fiving. Oh, you're wonderful. I'm wonderful. 00:07:15.240 --> 00:07:19.079 Isn't life happy? This word is that parakaleo. 00:07:19.240 --> 00:07:22.300 It's translated in some places as the word for 00:07:22.300 --> 00:07:23.959 the Holy Spirit. It's one who comes alongside. 00:07:24.920 --> 00:07:28.160 Encouragement is you come alongside another person, 00:07:28.220 --> 00:07:30.639 and sometimes it means you tell them really hard 00:07:30.639 --> 00:07:33.019 stuff. Sometimes it just means you listen and 00:07:33.019 --> 00:07:35.660 support, and sometimes you just say, I'm so proud 00:07:35.660 --> 00:07:41.139 of you. But it's doing life together. It's caring. 00:07:44.560 --> 00:07:50.180 I just... I just want in my heart and mind to 00:07:50.180 --> 00:07:52.740 just sort of say to myself, Chip, on any given 00:07:52.740 --> 00:07:58.060 day, in the exact right circumstances, you are 00:07:58.060 --> 00:08:01.779 capable of sin beyond your wildest imagination. 00:08:02.399 --> 00:08:05.819 So you need to make pre -decisions about where 00:08:05.819 --> 00:08:08.439 you'll go and what you'll do and who you'll hang 00:08:08.439 --> 00:08:11.839 with. And you need to have a group of people 00:08:11.839 --> 00:08:16.740 that... you can surround yourself with that love 00:08:16.740 --> 00:08:19.660 you, that you invite into your life and say, 00:08:19.740 --> 00:08:23.560 you know what? Here's my heart, here's my life, 00:08:23.579 --> 00:08:25.139 here's my motives, here's my struggles. This 00:08:25.139 --> 00:08:27.100 is what I'm going through in my life. Where are 00:08:27.100 --> 00:08:31.699 you going? And if you don't have that, you'll 00:08:31.699 --> 00:08:34.980 start faking it. And you'll have these temptations 00:08:34.980 --> 00:08:38.019 and you'll have thoughts. And you'll feel like, 00:08:38.100 --> 00:08:40.259 well, I can't. Well, actually, it leads to the 00:08:40.259 --> 00:08:43.370 very next and last reason. The fifth reason that 00:08:43.370 --> 00:08:45.429 we need biblical accountability is we naively 00:08:45.429 --> 00:08:48.870 believe our struggles and temptations are unique. 00:08:50.529 --> 00:08:55.090 See, I need it because I think, I mean, well, 00:08:55.250 --> 00:08:57.169 whether I like it or not, I've been a pastor 00:08:57.169 --> 00:09:00.809 for like 25 years, and people view me as a Christian 00:09:00.809 --> 00:09:03.230 leader, so I guess I'm a Christian leader, and 00:09:03.230 --> 00:09:05.250 then I have this profile, Christian leaders. 00:09:05.470 --> 00:09:07.429 I bet they never struggle with this, and I guess 00:09:07.429 --> 00:09:09.190 now I'm a Christian leader, so if I ever struggle 00:09:09.190 --> 00:09:13.490 with that, something must be wrong with me. I'm 00:09:13.490 --> 00:09:18.169 a man. And you're a man or a woman or a student. 00:09:19.750 --> 00:09:24.450 And no temptation has ever taken me or ever taken 00:09:24.450 --> 00:09:28.389 you, but what is common to man. But God will, 00:09:28.429 --> 00:09:31.149 with the temptation, provide a way of escape 00:09:31.149 --> 00:09:36.850 that you might be able to endure it. You're listening 00:09:36.850 --> 00:09:39.769 to Living on the Edge. We'll get back to Chip's 00:09:39.769 --> 00:09:42.029 message in just a minute. But first, if you're 00:09:42.029 --> 00:09:43.970 in a small group and are looking for what to 00:09:43.970 --> 00:09:47.230 study next, consider the Balancing Life's Demand 00:09:47.230 --> 00:09:49.970 small group. The resource for this series will 00:09:49.970 --> 00:09:52.649 help you realign your priorities and experience 00:09:52.649 --> 00:09:55.629 a more joy -filled life. Stick around after the 00:09:55.629 --> 00:09:58.470 teaching for complete details. But for now, here 00:09:58.470 --> 00:10:04.350 again is Chip. One time someone said, you know, 00:10:05.340 --> 00:10:07.820 I don't know how you do it, Chip, because sometimes 00:10:07.820 --> 00:10:10.019 when you talk, I feel like you're just talking 00:10:10.019 --> 00:10:13.340 to me, like you're reading my mind. This verse 00:10:13.340 --> 00:10:17.019 is my preaching verse. Now, this may sound crazy, 00:10:17.100 --> 00:10:20.399 but any area I've ever struggled with in my life, 00:10:20.460 --> 00:10:22.259 I make this assumption. So does everybody else. 00:10:24.139 --> 00:10:26.600 And then it's like, I'm not, you know, I've told 00:10:26.600 --> 00:10:28.799 you I'm insecure, just like everybody else in 00:10:28.799 --> 00:10:32.259 this room. I'm not overly vulnerable. I'm just 00:10:32.259 --> 00:10:34.879 thinking to myself, let's see, if every guy I've 00:10:34.879 --> 00:10:37.419 ever met, apart from the comatose guy, struggle 00:10:37.419 --> 00:10:40.120 with lust at some level. Every woman I've ever 00:10:40.120 --> 00:10:41.799 met at some level struggles with self -image. 00:10:42.139 --> 00:10:45.320 Okay, everyone gets overextended. I mean, everyone 00:10:45.320 --> 00:10:47.360 has unresolved anger issues in your marriage. 00:10:47.559 --> 00:10:49.899 Everyone has, some season in your marriage, you 00:10:49.899 --> 00:10:51.740 have problems with communication, sex, in -laws, 00:10:51.820 --> 00:10:56.480 and kids, right? I mean, duh. So I don't think, 00:10:56.480 --> 00:10:58.830 it's not like, oh. I mean, you know, when you 00:10:58.830 --> 00:11:00.350 start talking about a few of those things, you're 00:11:00.350 --> 00:11:03.570 like, oh gosh, what's wrong with him? You know, 00:11:03.590 --> 00:11:05.870 what I get is, eh, he's one of us, you know. 00:11:07.070 --> 00:11:10.690 Temptation is not the same thing as sin. Temptation 00:11:10.690 --> 00:11:13.110 means there's an opportunity to be lured away 00:11:13.110 --> 00:11:16.009 in some way. You know, looking at a very attractive 00:11:16.009 --> 00:11:22.190 woman and going, wow, very attractive is not 00:11:22.190 --> 00:11:25.129 the same as lusting for her. And you know, as 00:11:25.129 --> 00:11:27.330 a mature believer, I can say, Lord, man, I... 00:11:27.960 --> 00:11:30.000 Sunsets are beautiful and the trees are beautiful. 00:11:30.100 --> 00:11:33.940 She's beautiful. And that's look number one. 00:11:34.899 --> 00:11:37.279 Now I want to thank you for what you made beautiful 00:11:37.279 --> 00:11:41.519 for me, Teresa. Because we naively believe our 00:11:41.519 --> 00:11:46.360 struggles and temptations are unique, we start 00:11:46.360 --> 00:11:48.759 to hide the ones that we think we're too mature 00:11:48.759 --> 00:11:51.960 or we shouldn't have. And I just want to go back 00:11:51.960 --> 00:11:56.870 to secrecy. is where the enemy will bombard you 00:11:56.870 --> 00:12:00.730 with doubts and struggles and condemnation. You 00:12:00.730 --> 00:12:02.690 know what? When you have a struggle, let me tell 00:12:02.690 --> 00:12:07.850 you what the Spirit does. It's specific. It's 00:12:07.850 --> 00:12:11.970 sin, righteousness, judgment. Repent, because 00:12:11.970 --> 00:12:15.000 I love you. Condemnation is vague. You're a terrible 00:12:15.000 --> 00:12:17.379 person. You know, you're a lousy this, you're 00:12:17.379 --> 00:12:19.440 a lousy that. You know why God put you on this. 00:12:19.779 --> 00:12:23.139 It's general. It's vague. Condemnation makes 00:12:23.139 --> 00:12:25.919 you not like you, not like God, and not want 00:12:25.919 --> 00:12:29.100 to pray. Conviction is a light shining on something 00:12:29.100 --> 00:12:30.940 that needs to be addressed, and you lift it into 00:12:30.940 --> 00:12:33.139 the light. And just like bacteria out of the 00:12:33.139 --> 00:12:36.179 darkness, when the light hits the bacteria, and 00:12:36.179 --> 00:12:39.059 so that the fellowship can be restored. If you 00:12:39.059 --> 00:12:41.200 confess, agree with God about your sins, he's 00:12:41.200 --> 00:12:44.350 faithful. And just to what? forgive, release 00:12:44.350 --> 00:12:48.490 you of all your sins and cleanse you of all unrighteousness. 00:12:48.590 --> 00:12:50.409 What's he say about this biblical accountability? 00:12:50.750 --> 00:12:53.029 He says, what's the summary? Therefore, my beloved, 00:12:53.169 --> 00:12:56.870 flee from idolatry. See, at the heart of it, 00:12:56.870 --> 00:13:00.450 at the heart of it all is that I end up me worshiping 00:13:00.450 --> 00:13:03.080 me. It's really not about the sex. It's about 00:13:03.080 --> 00:13:04.779 the ego. It's really not about the food. It's 00:13:04.779 --> 00:13:06.600 about the ego. It's not about the business and 00:13:06.600 --> 00:13:08.840 the work. It's about the ego. At the end of the 00:13:08.840 --> 00:13:11.600 day, the core of sin is gonna come back to in 00:13:11.600 --> 00:13:14.580 any and all of these is God gets taken off the 00:13:14.580 --> 00:13:18.679 throne, my way, my control, my agenda, a world 00:13:18.679 --> 00:13:20.519 system, lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, 00:13:20.620 --> 00:13:23.399 pride of life, promising me security, significance, 00:13:23.759 --> 00:13:26.879 value, and worth. Apart from God, I bite on the 00:13:26.879 --> 00:13:32.970 bait. I make an idol. And then Paul says, and 00:13:32.970 --> 00:13:35.909 if I happen that, I get disqualified. Disqualified 00:13:35.909 --> 00:13:39.450 for my relationship of eternal life? No. Disqualified 00:13:39.450 --> 00:13:44.909 as a useful vessel of honor and disqualified 00:13:44.909 --> 00:13:47.690 not only of use by God, but bringing incredible, 00:13:47.809 --> 00:13:51.289 incredible pain in the lives of others. There's 00:13:51.289 --> 00:13:55.870 no such thing as private sins. Every sin I commit, 00:13:55.970 --> 00:14:00.120 every sin you commit has ripples. Some of them 00:14:00.120 --> 00:14:02.480 you may never see, but they have ripples. Even 00:14:02.480 --> 00:14:04.360 the ones that no one else has found out about, 00:14:04.440 --> 00:14:08.120 they have ripples. So I've given you five reasons 00:14:08.120 --> 00:14:15.440 to say, dear God, I not only want, I am committed 00:14:15.440 --> 00:14:19.000 to having biblical accountability in my life. 00:14:20.519 --> 00:14:25.399 I mean, Paul needed it. I need it. 1 Corinthians 00:14:25.399 --> 00:14:30.070 10 outlines clearly we all need it. How do you 00:14:30.070 --> 00:14:32.529 get it? How does it work? Let me give you some 00:14:32.529 --> 00:14:34.929 practical, I guess I call them spiritual tips 00:14:34.929 --> 00:14:39.110 on getting there. Number one, it begins at home. 00:14:39.830 --> 00:14:41.769 When we talk about accountability too often, 00:14:41.809 --> 00:14:46.529 we jump into places outside. Start with the people 00:14:46.529 --> 00:14:48.649 that you live with. I think there's appropriate 00:14:48.649 --> 00:14:51.230 things as men better off to share with men and 00:14:51.230 --> 00:14:54.169 women with women. I'm very super open with my 00:14:54.169 --> 00:14:56.330 wife, but there are certain things that, you 00:14:56.330 --> 00:14:58.649 know what? My wife is not a man. She doesn't 00:14:58.649 --> 00:15:01.350 really understand. And I need some guys that 00:15:01.350 --> 00:15:04.129 I can share that with and her vice versa. But 00:15:04.129 --> 00:15:06.269 I think you got to start in your home, your marriage 00:15:06.269 --> 00:15:10.330 partner or your roommates. Second, it's an atmosphere 00:15:10.330 --> 00:15:14.490 of love, tender, compassionate, someone who's 00:15:14.490 --> 00:15:17.870 rooting for you. Third, it must be voluntary 00:15:17.870 --> 00:15:21.950 and by permission. By the way, I think this is 00:15:21.950 --> 00:15:25.149 one you need to really negotiate. It is really 00:15:25.149 --> 00:15:29.370 hard. Some of you are in these sort of semi -imbalanced 00:15:29.370 --> 00:15:31.850 kind of relationships. And, you know, you're 00:15:31.850 --> 00:15:33.669 the wife and you're in the Bible and you love 00:15:33.669 --> 00:15:35.629 God and you're going to church and your husband's 00:15:35.629 --> 00:15:41.149 sort of, you know, not so close. And, you know, 00:15:41.149 --> 00:15:43.049 it's like as he gets up, here's a Bible passage 00:15:43.049 --> 00:15:46.029 opened and here's a CD by so -and -so. And by 00:15:46.029 --> 00:15:48.610 the way, honey, I'll pick up your favorite meal 00:15:48.610 --> 00:15:50.570 if you just go to church with us. And just forget 00:15:50.570 --> 00:15:54.759 that jazz. Let God work. You let your chaste 00:15:54.759 --> 00:15:58.580 behavior and how you live say, I'll tell you 00:15:58.580 --> 00:16:00.700 what, if this love in Jesus makes you love me 00:16:00.700 --> 00:16:03.440 the way you love me, then honey, you just keep 00:16:03.440 --> 00:16:05.259 going to church and I might even check it out. 00:16:05.279 --> 00:16:10.039 Let God and vice versa. So, you know, it's got 00:16:10.039 --> 00:16:14.259 to be by permission. We don't go out and hold 00:16:14.259 --> 00:16:19.000 other people accountable. Four, it must be specific, 00:16:19.059 --> 00:16:22.620 not generic. I mean, this sort of, hey, why don't 00:16:22.620 --> 00:16:24.500 you meet? We all have coffee. And so, how are 00:16:24.500 --> 00:16:26.000 you doing in general? I'm doing pretty good in 00:16:26.000 --> 00:16:27.700 general. How are you doing in general? I'm doing 00:16:27.700 --> 00:16:29.200 pretty good in general. So, what do you think 00:16:29.200 --> 00:16:31.120 of those Falcons? In our place, they actually 00:16:31.120 --> 00:16:33.620 won a game. Amen. Or, hey, you think the Cardinals 00:16:33.620 --> 00:16:36.299 are, you know, going to be any good this year? 00:16:36.340 --> 00:16:38.860 That quarterback change? Or, I don't know. Have 00:16:38.860 --> 00:16:40.340 you seen the last of Southern Living Magazine? 00:16:40.559 --> 00:16:42.940 I thought it was so cute the way that, you know. 00:16:43.740 --> 00:16:45.159 And isn't it good to be in these accountability 00:16:45.159 --> 00:16:47.639 groups? It just makes me feel warm all over. 00:16:47.980 --> 00:16:53.139 You know? And we kid ourselves thinking that 00:16:53.139 --> 00:16:56.019 something's happening. It needs to be specific. 00:16:56.720 --> 00:17:00.039 You might even put some things in writing and 00:17:00.039 --> 00:17:02.940 say, you know what, as we meet together, these 00:17:02.940 --> 00:17:05.579 are the things we want to cover. I have a fellow, 00:17:05.680 --> 00:17:07.579 he's that dad figure, and I'll never forget, 00:17:07.700 --> 00:17:10.240 I was in Dallas, and he has permission, and we 00:17:10.240 --> 00:17:12.960 talk on a regular basis, and he's real funny. 00:17:12.960 --> 00:17:15.180 He has a flat top and kind of looks at me like 00:17:15.180 --> 00:17:18.069 this, and he said, oh! Okay, why are we waiting 00:17:18.069 --> 00:17:21.250 on our food? Are you ready? And, you know, it's 00:17:21.250 --> 00:17:23.109 like a game show or something. I said, AC, man, 00:17:23.170 --> 00:17:25.029 what are you doing? He goes, well, are you ready? 00:17:25.289 --> 00:17:26.829 So, yeah, he takes his wallet and he has this 00:17:26.829 --> 00:17:29.329 little laminated thing and real small print and 00:17:29.329 --> 00:17:32.950 his questions. Question number one. Have you 00:17:32.950 --> 00:17:36.049 any time since we last met been on the internet 00:17:36.049 --> 00:17:41.250 and watched anything inappropriate? Question 00:17:41.250 --> 00:17:43.990 number two. And, I mean, he goes through my thought 00:17:43.990 --> 00:17:49.119 life, my... time, my money, my ego. And then 00:17:49.119 --> 00:17:51.599 the last question after is like five basic areas. 00:17:51.660 --> 00:17:55.900 He goes, question number six, have you lied to 00:17:55.900 --> 00:18:01.779 me on questions one through five? And you know 00:18:01.779 --> 00:18:05.220 what? He knows me and he's kind of goofy. He 00:18:05.220 --> 00:18:07.680 knew it'd be uncomfortable. He knew it'd be the 00:18:07.680 --> 00:18:10.220 kind of thing that, you know, it's always awkward. 00:18:10.759 --> 00:18:14.940 But guess what? I got a safe place to go. Anybody 00:18:14.940 --> 00:18:17.940 ask you those questions? You asking anybody those 00:18:17.940 --> 00:18:21.779 questions? According to this passage, until the 00:18:21.779 --> 00:18:24.680 day you take your last breath and I take my last 00:18:24.680 --> 00:18:26.380 breath, there'll be struggles in those areas, 00:18:26.460 --> 00:18:29.119 right? So it needs to be specific. And by the 00:18:29.119 --> 00:18:31.220 way, every time it doesn't need to be like hardcore, 00:18:31.420 --> 00:18:36.339 all right, you know? But you build relationship 00:18:36.339 --> 00:18:39.559 and you build trust, but we're gonna be specific 00:18:39.559 --> 00:18:43.269 about some things. My rule of thumb is no more 00:18:43.269 --> 00:18:46.910 than four people unless there's unique relationships 00:18:46.910 --> 00:18:51.109 of closeness that allow for more. And I think 00:18:51.109 --> 00:18:53.910 two is not great because we start getting blind 00:18:53.910 --> 00:18:56.710 spots for one another. I mean, it's okay. I think 00:18:56.710 --> 00:18:59.130 mentoring relationships are great, but for accountability, 00:18:59.230 --> 00:19:01.349 there's something healthy about having someone 00:19:01.349 --> 00:19:04.029 listen to stuff and say, because what you do 00:19:04.029 --> 00:19:05.710 is you're vulnerable when you're really being 00:19:05.710 --> 00:19:08.069 open and you only have one set of eyes looking 00:19:08.069 --> 00:19:09.990 at what's going on. I want a couple set of eyes. 00:19:10.329 --> 00:19:12.509 So I have kind of relationships with a handful 00:19:12.509 --> 00:19:16.410 of people like this. The conclusion, making sincere 00:19:16.410 --> 00:19:22.390 commitments is tough. Keeping them is next to 00:19:22.390 --> 00:19:30.089 impossible. Alone. There's hope. Many start well. 00:19:30.670 --> 00:19:36.470 Few finish well. You can be the exception. You 00:19:36.470 --> 00:19:42.710 can be the exception. You're listening to Living 00:19:42.710 --> 00:19:45.309 on the Edge with Chip Ingram. And the message 00:19:45.309 --> 00:19:47.710 you just heard, how to keep first things first, 00:19:47.809 --> 00:19:50.569 is from our series, Balancing Life's Demands. 00:19:50.869 --> 00:19:53.410 Chip will join us in studio to share some insights 00:19:53.410 --> 00:19:56.920 from today's talk in just a minute. Are you exhausted 00:19:56.920 --> 00:20:00.079 juggling your job, kids, marriage, and everything 00:20:00.079 --> 00:20:02.619 else you're responsible for? Do you wish there 00:20:02.619 --> 00:20:05.559 was a way to relieve that stress and live with 00:20:05.559 --> 00:20:08.180 a little more joy? Well, in this series, Chip 00:20:08.180 --> 00:20:11.119 reveals what a balanced life looks like and how 00:20:11.119 --> 00:20:13.420 you can rearrange your priorities around what 00:20:13.420 --> 00:20:16.420 matters most. Hear how to experience the joy 00:20:16.420 --> 00:20:19.220 -filled and satisfying life God desires for you 00:20:19.220 --> 00:20:21.920 to have. Now, if you've missed any part of Chip's 00:20:21.920 --> 00:20:24.279 teaching, catch up anytime on the Chip Ingram 00:20:24.279 --> 00:20:26.750 app. Well, Chip's here in studio now to talk 00:20:26.750 --> 00:20:29.109 about a resource we have that complements our 00:20:29.109 --> 00:20:32.289 current series. Thanks, Dave. You know, in today's 00:20:32.289 --> 00:20:34.990 world, it's easy to get pulled in a million different 00:20:34.990 --> 00:20:38.730 directions. Work, family, church, kids' activities, 00:20:38.910 --> 00:20:41.890 and everything in between. And while all of these 00:20:41.890 --> 00:20:44.809 can be good things, they leave you feeling depleted, 00:20:44.950 --> 00:20:47.910 drained, and often not connected to the people 00:20:47.910 --> 00:20:50.609 that you love the most. Let me tell you something. 00:20:51.039 --> 00:20:54.599 That is not God's will or God's plan for your 00:20:54.599 --> 00:20:57.400 life. And we have a resource specifically designed 00:20:57.400 --> 00:21:00.539 to help you cut through the chaos and discover 00:21:00.539 --> 00:21:04.500 God's priorities for you and your family. Balancing 00:21:04.500 --> 00:21:07.279 Life's Demands is a small group study that will 00:21:07.279 --> 00:21:09.680 help you determine your should -dos in Christ 00:21:09.680 --> 00:21:12.200 from the could -dos that will steal your joy. 00:21:12.380 --> 00:21:14.559 If you want to get out from under the pressure 00:21:14.559 --> 00:21:17.140 and enjoy the life that God has in store for 00:21:17.140 --> 00:21:20.200 you, Balancing Life's Demands is the perfect 00:21:20.200 --> 00:21:23.279 tool. That's absolutely right, Chip. Well, to 00:21:23.279 --> 00:21:25.400 get your hands on this small group study, go 00:21:25.400 --> 00:21:29.839 to livingontheedge .org or call us at 888 -333 00:21:29.839 --> 00:21:34.079 -6003. I think you'll be blown away by how this 00:21:34.079 --> 00:21:36.779 resource will declutter your day -to -day, prioritize 00:21:36.779 --> 00:21:39.740 what matters most, and lead you to a more peace 00:21:39.740 --> 00:21:42.900 -filled life. To order the Balancing Life's Demand 00:21:42.900 --> 00:21:47.180 small group, visit livingontheedge .org. or call 00:21:47.180 --> 00:21:52.680 888 -333 -6003. App listeners tap special offers. 00:21:53.240 --> 00:21:56.140 As we close today's program, we've talked about 00:21:56.140 --> 00:21:59.240 the five specific reasons in the last two broadcasts 00:21:59.240 --> 00:22:02.079 of why we need accountable relationships. And 00:22:02.079 --> 00:22:03.940 then we have defined, and I think this definition 00:22:03.940 --> 00:22:07.779 is really important. Accountability is not other 00:22:07.779 --> 00:22:10.720 people playing the Holy Spirit and nagging my 00:22:10.720 --> 00:22:14.990 life. Accountability is me inviting. trusted 00:22:14.990 --> 00:22:18.609 people into my life to help me keep my commitments 00:22:18.609 --> 00:22:20.890 to God. Now, here's the other thing. There's 00:22:20.890 --> 00:22:23.130 a lot of, quote, accountability groups, all kind 00:22:23.130 --> 00:22:26.390 of small groups. But I will tell you, my experience 00:22:26.390 --> 00:22:28.930 has been that there's a big problem in these 00:22:28.930 --> 00:22:32.970 groups. It's called lying, okay? I'm dead serious. 00:22:33.089 --> 00:22:35.970 I have been in accountability groups and have 00:22:35.970 --> 00:22:39.029 good friends in accountability groups that people 00:22:39.029 --> 00:22:42.230 who... Walked off with someone else's mate. People 00:22:42.230 --> 00:22:45.029 who have been involved in fraud at significant 00:22:45.029 --> 00:22:48.509 levels were in that accountability group. I think 00:22:48.509 --> 00:22:50.930 it's so important that we create an atmosphere 00:22:50.930 --> 00:22:54.529 where we really accept one another for who we 00:22:54.529 --> 00:22:57.279 are and the struggles that we have. But it's 00:22:57.279 --> 00:22:59.960 also an atmosphere where there's some tough love 00:22:59.960 --> 00:23:02.440 that goes on. You know, so often I think in the 00:23:02.440 --> 00:23:06.279 name of caring for one another, loving one another. 00:23:06.400 --> 00:23:08.059 I've been in groups where, you know, someone 00:23:08.059 --> 00:23:10.980 shows up seven, eight weeks in a row, doesn't 00:23:10.980 --> 00:23:13.140 do the lesson, doesn't memorize the passage, 00:23:13.339 --> 00:23:16.420 doesn't be very authentic. And everyone just 00:23:16.420 --> 00:23:18.640 keeps giving them a pass like, well, you know, 00:23:18.660 --> 00:23:20.160 we're Christians. We don't want to be too hard 00:23:20.160 --> 00:23:23.119 on him. Guess what? Sometimes you need to be 00:23:23.119 --> 00:23:25.799 hard on people that you love. All discipline. 00:23:26.160 --> 00:23:28.559 the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful. 00:23:28.619 --> 00:23:31.000 Yet those who've been trained by it, afterwards 00:23:31.000 --> 00:23:32.859 it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. 00:23:33.319 --> 00:23:36.460 I can look back at four or five major times in 00:23:36.460 --> 00:23:39.460 my life where people said things to me that I 00:23:39.460 --> 00:23:41.519 wanted to get up and hit them. I mean, I can't 00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:43.900 believe they said that. And the reason I wanted 00:23:43.900 --> 00:23:45.700 to get up and hit them was because they were 00:23:45.700 --> 00:23:49.799 absolutely right. When you find people defensive, 00:23:50.589 --> 00:23:53.150 And rationalizing, I will tell you, underneath 00:23:53.150 --> 00:23:58.170 that is unknown, unresolved patterns of sin that 00:23:58.170 --> 00:24:00.730 need to be addressed. Let's really love each 00:24:00.730 --> 00:24:03.650 other and stop playing games. Let's be Romans 00:24:03.650 --> 00:24:07.009 12 Christians from the inside out. Great challenge, 00:24:07.130 --> 00:24:09.230 Chip. In fact, we'd like to help you become a 00:24:09.230 --> 00:24:11.950 more dedicated follower of Jesus. So check out 00:24:11.950 --> 00:24:15.750 Chip's broadcast series, True Spirituality. As 00:24:15.750 --> 00:24:18.130 you walk through Romans chapter 12 with Chip, 00:24:18.250 --> 00:24:21.049 you'll uncover the profile of an authentic disciple. 00:24:21.390 --> 00:24:24.329 To listen to this series, True Spirituality, 00:24:24.329 --> 00:24:28.089 go to special offers at livingontheedge .org 00:24:28.089 --> 00:24:31.559 or through the Chip Ingram app. You've been listening 00:24:31.559 --> 00:24:33.759 to a selected program that we wanted to share 00:24:33.759 --> 00:24:36.339 from this past week. To hear more from Chip's 00:24:36.339 --> 00:24:39.960 series, Balancing Life's Demands, go to livingontheedge 00:24:39.960 --> 00:24:43.640 .org or wherever you listen to podcasts. Until 00:24:43.640 --> 00:24:46.460 next time, I'm Dave Drewy saying thanks for listening 00:24:46.460 --> 00:24:49.259 to this weekend edition of Living on the Edge.