Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram.
Would you like to become a more loving person?
And by the way, is there someone in your life
right now that's hard to love? Well, stay with
me. Help is on the way to deliver on those two
things. Is there a relationship in your life
that's broken? Maybe it's an unresolved conflict
with a family member, a former business partner,
or someone at church. I'm Dave Drewy, and today
on Living on the Edge, Chip Ingram launches a
powerful series called Choosing Love, a daily
decision that changes everything. In today's
message, Chip reveals why God's greatest joy
is seeing His children love one another. If you're
ready to transform your most important connections,
this message is for you. Well, here's Chip Ingram
with a message titled, Love Gives. One of God's
greatest joys is to see His children love each
other. Isn't that amazing? The God of heaven,
the God that created the stars, the God who made
us, the God who sent God the Son to die in our
place, one of his greatest, greatest joys is
when we love one another. And, you know, I know
as a parent, I mean, isn't that true for those
of you that are parents? I had twin boys, and
Therese and I have sons that are twins, and Eric
and Jason, and they're five minutes apart. I
mean, for the first 18 years of their life. I
mean, at times they dressed the same. They had,
you know, the same classes, the same room, the
same everything. Did they fight? I mean, fought.
I mean, to the point of, I mean, physical. And
I'll never forget the time. We came home from
a little getaway a couple days. And, well, how'd
everything go? Oh, things were great. Things
were great. And, you know, they were kind of.
standing kind of funny against a wall or something,
and I didn't even notice it, and we had a great
time. And years later, you know, when families
get together and adult kids tell you what really
happened, oh, Dad, we couldn't believe you and
Mom didn't even notice that Eric and Jason got
in a fight, and Eric went to punch him, and he
ducked, and he put his fist through the wall,
and we patched it and painted it. We were so
afraid you would find out. I remember Teresa
saying once, because she grew up with two sisters,
she said, do you think they'll ever, ever love
each other? I said, honey, this is kind of normal
stuff, yes. I mean, we have to set boundaries
and discipline. But I just want you to get that
God's heart, it breaks his heart when we fight.
It breaks his heart when we have feelings inside
that are resentful and bitter. And when you have
an unresolved relationship with another believer,
another brother, another sister, maybe you did
business with him. Maybe you were in a small
group with him. Maybe it was in another church.
I don't know. But I'm going to ask you, get your
heart open. God wants to deal with because it
matters to God, not just because it brings him
joy, but it's so important. It's such a priority
to him. If we could eavesdrop the very last night
when Jesus was praying in John 17. I mean, you
read that prayer, Father, Father. Make them one
even as we are one. You in me and I in you and
us in them. Father, I pray that as I leave that
you would cause there to be a supernatural unity
in order that the world would know. That's a
prayer that only you can answer in your home.
Only I can answer in my relationships. And not
only does God the Father find joy when we love
one another, and God the Son prays passionately
and commands us to love one another and says
the gospel, its validity is based on whether
the world sees us love each other, the Apostle
Paul commands it. In our study in Philippians
chapter two, follow along, I'm reading in the
Phillips translation. He says, now if you experience
of Christ, if there's any encouragement and love
means anything to you, If you've known something
of the fellowship of his spirit and all that
it means in kindness and deep sympathy, and then
here's the command, make my best hope for you
or my joy come true. Live together in harmony.
Live together in love as though you had only
one mind and one spirit before you. So just before
you open those notes, I want you to think about
Is there any relationship that you don't have
harmony that's out of sorts? And I'm pushing
a little bit because we tend to push these down.
Could have been two months ago, two years ago,
could be 20 years ago, could be an in -law situation
or a brother or sister you haven't seen in 20
years. God. wants to get a hold of our hearts
and our life. And Philippians chapter two is
gonna teach us how we can choose love and experience
it. Now, as you open your notes, I want you to
see the structure of this passage. First of all,
there's a very clear context. There's conflict
without, and there's conflict within. The conflict
without, you know, there was persecution. There
was difficulty. There was pressure. These Philippian
Christians, just like Paul, I mean, they were
getting intimidated. They were getting persecuted.
They were having struggles and conflicts from
the pagan world and even from some Jewish false
teachers. I mean, not a lot different than what
we see happening more and more and more today
is that, you know, people are intimidating Christians.
People are becoming more afraid as believers.
To stand up and stand strong because of external
pressure. But in this particular church, there's
conflict within. We'll learn more about it in
chapter four when we meet a couple ladies that
apparently had a real conflict that was causing
a rift throughout the whole church. And you and
I have both seen that happen in a small group
or in a family or in Sunday school class. And
so then there's a very, very interesting command.
I gave the words, live in authentic. Christ -empowered
unity. Now, the way he says it is, make my joy
complete. I mean, he said, you've brought me
great joy. You came to Christ. Remember, I was
in that Philippian jail and we had fellowship
and you all came to know the Lord and there's
this tremendous movement happening in this church.
He said, so I've received joy now. Make my joy
complete because since Paul is now in Rome, some
things have happened, like happened in lots of
churches and lots of families and lots of small
groups. You know? This person thinks it ought
to be this way. And this person says no. And
well, you said this to my daughter. Well, this
is how you treated my son. Well, you know, every
time you come, you know, you think you're the
hottest stuff and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And there it goes. And so Paul says, make my
joy complete. And he says, I want there to be
authentic Christ -empowered unity. In other words,
he says, I don't want just you to, you know,
put up with each other. I don't want it to be
just superficial. From the heart, I want you
to love one another, resolve the conflicts, forgive
one another, care for one another in a way that
Christ has cared for you. Look at this very,
very interesting structure. The structure here,
he says, notice it says there's an if -then.
In Greek, and I won't... get too detailed here,
but there's called conditional clauses. And we
have them in English as well. But what I love
about the Greek language, it's so clear. There's
like three or four types of conditional clauses.
So when it says, if, then, if, then, you know
for sure what they're talking about. This is
called a first class condition. And the idea
is it's assumed to be true. And so notice what
he says. He goes, if there's any encouragement
in Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any
fellowship with the spirit, if any tenderness
and compassion, And you could translate all that,
since you have encouragement in Christ, since
you have comfort, since you have fellowship,
since you have tenderness and compassion, then
make my joy complete by, notice, after these
four incentives, be of the same mind, maintaining
the same love, united in spirit, intent on one
purpose. It's interesting here. He's going to
tell us that unlike the golden rule, which is
do unto others as you would have them do unto
you. His premise goes a little bit differently.
I call it the platinum rule. Do unto others as
God has already done unto you. In other words,
the entire premise, what happens in conflicts
and struggles and relationships is we think just
horizontal and they did that and they don't deserve
that. And when she apologizes or when he does
that or when one of my kids comes back and really
says, you know, dad, I'm really sorry and I understood
this or I understood that or, you know, what
they said at that last Thanksgiving or that family
reunion, I'll never talk to them again unless
what they need to do. He said, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no. He said, here's what
I want you to get. The basis of loving people
isn't how they've treated you, good or bad. The
basis of our love is a choice. I choose love.
And here's the basis of the choice. The basis
of the choice is this is how God's loved you.
He has encouraged you. He's come alongside you.
He's forgiven you. been tender, you now have
the fellowship. He has come to take up residence
in you. He sealed you with his spirit. He's adopted
you. He's given you spiritual gifts, a tenderness
and compassion. The word tenderness here is splachna.
It has the idea, it's rooted in the idea of something
deep within the bowels. There's something tender,
deep in the character of God that you are his
treasure. And then the compassion is an outward
external evidence of an action that you so matter
that he did something. And what he did was. He
chose to go to the cross. He chose to love you
and me when we were his enemies. While we were
yet enemies, Christ died in our place, Paul tells
us in Romans 5 .8. And so the basis, the incentives,
all four of these incentives, this is how you
have been authentically, deeply, unconditionally
loved now. make my joy complete, and be unified
authentically from the heart. And now he's going
to show us exactly what biblical unity looks
like. Number one, he says, be like -minded or
of one spirit. Literally, it means think the
same things. And the focus here is on truth.
You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip
Ingram. We'll hear more from Chip in just a moment.
If today's message is speaking to your heart,
Don't keep it to yourself. Share this teaching
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all waiting for you at livingontheedge .org.
Let's continue with Chip's message. See, genuine
unity is built on truth. It's thinking, it's
content, it's doctrine. These things are true.
So often, and I see it more and more today, it's
unity is sort of like, oh, let's just love everyone,
don't judge anyone. It's pseudo -unity. I mean,
who are we to say anything? Let's just let this
slide. Real unity demands truth. It demands truth
about what the scripture says about morality.
It demands truth about what the scripture says
about sexuality. It demands truth about doctrine
when it talks about the very narrow way to go
to heaven and by what Christ has done in him
alone. He says unity is rooted in truth. Second,
he says maintaining the same love. He says it's
not just about the truth. This phrase here is...
have the same love, mutually love one another
the way God has loved you, honestly, sacrificially.
You know, we talk a lot about Romans 12 here
as the profile of what it is to be a disciple.
And in Romans chapter 12, there's a section in
the middle about loving one another, and it says,
outdo one another in honor. Be devoted to one
another in brotherly love. This is the idea.
This isn't like some, yes, well, you know, she's
not as spiritual as I am and I guess they made
a mistake. And so, you know, I'll treat them
and I'll forgive them because, you know, I am
superior. He said, no, this has got to come from
the heart. Biblical unity has to do with a genuine
spiritual transformation. that flows from an
internal passion and concern that God gives you
because you have received it. Now you give it
third notice. It has the idea of united in spirit.
Literally, the phrase is like -souled. It means
to have a common heart, not just that you care,
a common heart, that you're real, that you're
authentic. No superficiality. And then the last
one here is intent on one purpose. It's a unity
that you say, we're in it together. We're gonna
resolve our issues. What God has done for me,
I'm commanded to pass on to you. Paul, we're
going to make your joy complete, and here's how
we're going to do it. We're going to be one mind,
truth. We're going to be one heart, care for
one another. We're going to have one soul. We're
going to connect, and we have a common purpose,
the gospel going forward, people being loved,
the poor being fed, people with HIV knowing someone
cares, the people that are struggling with sexual
identity issues know there's a church somewhere
that cares. that wants to help, that doesn't
condemn, that doesn't bend on the truth, but
actually wants to help people that are marginalized
and struggling. This is what he's talking about.
And it's that kind of love that turned the world
upside down and continues to turn the world upside
down. Family by family, small group by small
group, church by church, community by community.
God has called this church at this time when
it appears that the world is falling apart and
that America is so divided. God is calling you
and he's calling me. Make my joy complete, my
children. I want you to choose to love. And when
you cross your arms and say, not after what they've
done to me or, you know, I think those people
are crazy and why are these people doing this
and why are they tweeting that and I'm so ticked
off. Can you imagine, honestly? I mean, honestly,
can you imagine the God of heaven looking down
upon the creation that he's made and then looking
closely at his people? The church, I don't mean
buildings. People within the spirit of God is
living. You talk about someone that ought to
be ticked off and yet he's patient and kind and
gracious and he's saying to you and he's saying
to me, this is a priority. This is a non -negotiable.
I'm commanding you to choose to love one another.
Not the golden rule, the platinum rule. I want
you to love other people the way that I've loved
you. Now, I hope at this point you're saying,
okay, I get it. And those of you that are a little
more honest with yourself could be saying, you
know, I can't do that. And you know what? You'd
be right. I can't either. In fact, God doesn't
expect you to be able to do it. but he's gonna
tell us exactly how. So I want you to go back
to that former business associate, that ex -mate,
a dad, a mom, a son, a nephew, and then I wanna
open the text and what we're going to learn from
God's word, if you're willing, is that we can
choose love and we can learn how to be a more
loving person. Now, there's no magic pill. If
you think that, you know, in the next, you know,
minutes or so, I'm gonna give you some magic
pill. Oh, I'm loving, I'm loving, I love everybody.
No, no, no, no, no. We're gonna face some hard
things because what we're gonna learn is why
we're unloving, the drastic approach and what
we're gonna have to deal with in order to become
loving. And then we're gonna start this journey
of choosing love and I'm gonna share. Some real
practical ways where we can actually go on a
journey empowered by the Spirit of God and become
more loving. Notice the right side of your notes,
and it just asks this question, and we're gonna
answer it in just a minute. And the question
is, how to become a more loving person? Choose
to declare war on, write the word, Choose, declare
war on selfishness. And as usual, when I go high
tech here, my iPad is not working, so I think
I'll go with a little bit less technical one
that you all have. Turn to Philippians chapter
two, if you're not already there, and let me
read for you this command. Philippians chapter
two. We've looked at verses one and two. Follow
along here in chapter two as we read verse three
and four. Do nothing from selfishness or empty
conceit, but in humility of mind consider others
more important than yourself. Verse four, let
each of you look not only on your own interest,
but also on the interest of others. You may be
looking at this and saying, declare war? Aren't
you getting a little radical here? No, no. We're
born with this innate ability to be selfish.
In fact, let me define selfish ambition here.
Four words. I want my way. That's selfish ambition.
I want my way. It's a me first mentality. I want
to be number one. I'm selfish. It's very unpopular
to admit that. But what is hard to see in ourselves,
isn't it easy to see in others? I mean, you get
out on the freeway, are people selfish or what?
But you don't slide out of being selfish. Even
though the living spirit of Christ lives inside
of you and you're born again and you're a part
of the kingdom of God, there's this battle. The
Galatians talks about the spirit wages war against
the flesh. This predisposition toward my way,
my stuff is rooted in your heart, and you'll
have it until the day you die. But the Spirit
of God can give you the ability to, in humility,
look at the second half of that text. In humility,
consider others as more important than yourself.
Humility can be a very misunderstood word. So
I came across a very, very interesting article.
I think of humility as not thinking too highly
of yourself, not thinking too lowly of yourself,
but having an accurate, sober self -assessment.
As one person said, humility is not thinking
less of yourself. Humility is just thinking less
about yourself. This is Living on the Edge with
Chip Ingram, and we've just begun a powerful
series called Choosing Love. Chip will be back
with more on this in just a moment. If you're
serious about transforming your relationships,
you need to get your hands on Chip's newest book,
I Choose Love. Here's the key insight. Love isn't
something that just happens to you. It's something
you can choose to experience every single day.
In I Choose Love, you'll discover essential practices
that revitalize connections, resolve conflict
peacefully, and help you build a lasting legacy
of love in your family and relationships. And
you know, this Bible teaching ministry has truly
reached the masses with solid gospel -centered
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And friend, when you give to Living on the Edge,
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We call it the Chip Ingram Sermon Podcast, presenting
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to end. You'll find these episodes alongside
our regular broadcasts on your podcast app. Just
search for Living on the Edge. Well, now here's
Chip. As we wrap up today's program, I don't
know if you caught it, but there was a little
phrase that we tend to think and actually act
horizontally. In other words, in relationships,
we tend to think, well, she did that, or he did
that, or they really ought to do that. And if
you've ever sat at a coffee shop and not really
tried to listen to other people's conversations,
but just happened to catch what they're saying,
you might observe that the great majority of
conversations in coffee shops are two people
talking about someone else. It's really interesting
how we find some, I think, kind of perverted
pleasure in talking about what some other political
party ought to do or what the government ought
to do or what someone at work did or talking
about my husband or my wife or one of my kids
in not such good terms. And the platinum rule
that we talked about is doing unto others as
God has already done unto you. I mean, we know
the golden rule. We know the joy that happens
when we treat others the way we want to be treated.
But I think sometimes we say, yes, I want to
do that, but I don't have the power or I don't
have the will. I don't have the motivation. And
as this chapter of Philippians 2 opened up, what
we really heard was, if there's been any encouragement
in Christ, if any comfort in his love, and we
learned that that little word, if, really means
since. Since God has loved you, since he's changed
you, since he's poured out all that you need,
so take what he's given to you and pass it on
to others. Could I encourage you today to think
of one person that you have a little bit of a
problem with? And then I want you to ponder the
platinum rule. And I want you to say, oh, Lord,
since you've accepted me and you've loved me
and you've helped me, I'm going to choose to
have an act of kindness toward this person. It
might be a note. It might be a text. You might
pick them up coffee and drop it off at work.
But do something kind for someone that you struggle
with. Watch what happens in them. And then watch
what happens in you. I'm Dave Drury, inviting
you to come back tomorrow as we continue our
series about choosing love right here on Living
on the Edge. Today's program is produced and
sponsored by Living on the Edge.