WEBVTT 00:00:01.449 --> 00:00:04.169 Today on Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. 00:00:04.250 --> 00:00:07.750 The entire Christian life is grace. Here's my 00:00:07.750 --> 00:00:10.730 question. Are you experiencing that grace today? 00:00:11.009 --> 00:00:13.750 Or are you consumed with guilt and shame and 00:00:13.750 --> 00:00:16.510 failure? I'm here to tell you on the basis of 00:00:16.510 --> 00:00:19.010 Scripture, you don't have to live that way anymore. 00:00:19.269 --> 00:00:22.670 You don't. Today, I'll share three specific ways 00:00:22.670 --> 00:00:26.309 that you can begin to soak in the love and restoration 00:00:26.309 --> 00:00:31.179 that your soul is craving. Stay with me. In a 00:00:31.179 --> 00:00:33.619 performance -driven world, it constantly tells 00:00:33.619 --> 00:00:36.079 them they're not enough. What's the one thing 00:00:36.079 --> 00:00:38.939 your children and grandchildren need most? Well, 00:00:38.979 --> 00:00:41.539 it's not more rules, higher standards, or better 00:00:41.539 --> 00:00:45.520 behavior. It's grace. True transformative grace. 00:00:45.960 --> 00:00:48.439 Today on Living on the Edge, Chip Ingram explains 00:00:48.439 --> 00:00:51.159 why teaching the next generation to live grace 00:00:51.159 --> 00:00:53.799 -filled lives may be the most critical legacy 00:00:53.799 --> 00:00:57.179 we can pass on. Through the shocking story of 00:00:57.179 --> 00:01:00.259 King David's catastrophic failure and his miraculous 00:01:00.259 --> 00:01:02.920 restoration, we'll discover how to help those 00:01:02.920 --> 00:01:05.900 you love most. They'll learn to receive God's 00:01:05.900 --> 00:01:08.840 unconditional love and extend that same grace 00:01:08.840 --> 00:01:11.560 to others. Before he starts the message, I'll 00:01:11.560 --> 00:01:13.760 remind you that Living on the Edge is making 00:01:13.760 --> 00:01:16.879 headway on the December match. But in order to 00:01:16.879 --> 00:01:19.379 reach our goal, we're inviting you to join us. 00:01:19.799 --> 00:01:21.760 We'll share more details about the match later. 00:01:21.959 --> 00:01:24.120 But right now, let's begin Chip's message titled, 00:01:24.260 --> 00:01:28.120 Teach Them to Live Grace -Filled Lives. The transferable 00:01:28.120 --> 00:01:31.060 concept we must pass on to our kids and to our 00:01:31.060 --> 00:01:36.400 grandkids is this. Teach them to live grace -filled 00:01:36.400 --> 00:01:43.319 lives. Let me ask you, how do we pass this radical, 00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:47.219 radical concept on to those we care about most? 00:01:48.170 --> 00:01:51.290 I think the first step is for you to write in 00:01:51.290 --> 00:01:54.650 your name. In my notes, it says, I, Chip Ingram, 00:01:54.750 --> 00:01:58.689 choose to believe that with God, my failure is 00:01:58.689 --> 00:02:02.090 never final. Now let's talk about how do you 00:02:02.090 --> 00:02:05.430 experience that? Let me give you three specific 00:02:05.430 --> 00:02:10.669 ways. First, encourage them to meditate on the 00:02:10.669 --> 00:02:15.110 lives of David and Peter, murderer, adulterer, 00:02:15.250 --> 00:02:20.330 and betrayer. who are among God's most beloved 00:02:20.330 --> 00:02:25.349 and mightily used servants. Did you ever wonder? 00:02:25.770 --> 00:02:29.629 I mean, some people wonder, is this really God's 00:02:29.629 --> 00:02:31.629 word? Can you really trust it? Did God really 00:02:31.629 --> 00:02:35.030 write this? And I got news for you. No man would 00:02:35.030 --> 00:02:39.189 ever write such a self -revealing book and allow 00:02:39.189 --> 00:02:42.849 the heroes of the story to be so messed up. This 00:02:42.849 --> 00:02:48.449 is God's dream team. And we have the audacity 00:02:48.449 --> 00:02:50.650 to say, well, God could never forgive me. I don't 00:02:50.650 --> 00:02:52.789 think he could ever use me. Are you kidding? 00:02:53.469 --> 00:02:56.389 I remember I had not read the Bible growing up 00:02:56.389 --> 00:02:59.610 at all. And I remember, you know, probably after 00:02:59.610 --> 00:03:02.030 a year or so and dealing with all the stuff that, 00:03:02.050 --> 00:03:05.270 you know, I had to deal with and just sort of 00:03:05.270 --> 00:03:07.629 a naive thought. I thought, you know, I've not 00:03:07.629 --> 00:03:11.710 killed anybody. I think God could use me. Because 00:03:11.710 --> 00:03:14.229 so far, the people that are used the most, they've 00:03:14.229 --> 00:03:16.009 all at least killed someone. I'm thinking, how 00:03:16.009 --> 00:03:19.789 much worse could it be than that? And you know, 00:03:19.849 --> 00:03:24.870 with your kids, they're gonna fail. Now, does 00:03:24.870 --> 00:03:26.610 it mean that there's not consequences for sin? 00:03:26.710 --> 00:03:29.110 Absolutely not. Does it mean you don't discipline? 00:03:29.370 --> 00:03:32.710 Absolutely not. And part of that is we gotta 00:03:32.710 --> 00:03:34.689 tell stories. We gotta tell the stories of Peter 00:03:34.689 --> 00:03:37.469 more than walking on the water and saying you 00:03:37.469 --> 00:03:41.159 are the Christ and talk about. What goes in a 00:03:41.159 --> 00:03:43.419 human heart to betray the person who loves you 00:03:43.419 --> 00:03:46.719 the most? And how did God treat people who blew 00:03:46.719 --> 00:03:50.780 it that badly? He caused some loving consequences 00:03:50.780 --> 00:03:56.139 and he restored and loved and used them. I mean, 00:03:56.139 --> 00:03:57.900 some people think, oh, God could never use me 00:03:57.900 --> 00:04:02.259 now. I'm thinking, Peter did okay. And I don't 00:04:02.259 --> 00:04:04.259 think there's a more grievous sin to God than 00:04:04.259 --> 00:04:07.740 betraying him. We need to meditate. We need to 00:04:07.740 --> 00:04:10.719 think about. We need to tell not just the Bible 00:04:10.719 --> 00:04:14.080 stories where they're heroes, but let's peel 00:04:14.080 --> 00:04:17.060 back some of the layers and talk about where 00:04:17.060 --> 00:04:21.279 they blew it and make it into real life and talk 00:04:21.279 --> 00:04:23.980 about that pastor that we all know who fell morally 00:04:23.980 --> 00:04:27.300 with a little bit different spirit and maybe 00:04:27.300 --> 00:04:29.560 assume that it was a good man in a weak moment. 00:04:30.519 --> 00:04:32.639 And maybe talk about, you know, in a weak moment, 00:04:32.699 --> 00:04:34.560 that could be me or that could be you or you 00:04:34.560 --> 00:04:36.720 when you talk to someone that you're trying to 00:04:36.720 --> 00:04:40.430 help. Pass on the things that matter most. Secondly, 00:04:40.610 --> 00:04:44.550 help them remove the power of secret. Secret 00:04:44.550 --> 00:04:47.790 is the key word. And condemnation by practicing 00:04:47.790 --> 00:04:51.129 repentance, James 4, 7 to 10, and confession, 00:04:51.310 --> 00:04:55.490 James 5, 16, with some mature believers that 00:04:55.490 --> 00:04:58.389 they can trust. The way the enemy works is this. 00:04:58.410 --> 00:05:02.399 When you sin, when you blow it big time, When 00:05:02.399 --> 00:05:04.579 you make a mistake, when you do something you're 00:05:04.579 --> 00:05:07.240 ashamed of, what happens is we do exactly what 00:05:07.240 --> 00:05:10.040 David did. We start to cover it up. We don't 00:05:10.040 --> 00:05:12.160 want anyone to know. We're embarrassed by it. 00:05:12.220 --> 00:05:14.139 We don't want the consequences of it. And we 00:05:14.139 --> 00:05:16.420 cover it up. And then a little secret. And by 00:05:16.420 --> 00:05:17.920 the way, I will tell you, it's just what the 00:05:17.920 --> 00:05:20.740 enemy does is then all my lands. Some of you, 00:05:20.740 --> 00:05:22.259 you've lived with stuff for years, some with 00:05:22.259 --> 00:05:24.480 decades. And anytime you start to take a step 00:05:24.480 --> 00:05:25.980 here, a step here, you don't think God's really 00:05:25.980 --> 00:05:28.579 going to use you. Don't you remember that hotel? 00:05:29.079 --> 00:05:31.040 Yeah, you were young, but remember that hotel 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:34.220 room? I mean, what happened if your mate ever 00:05:34.220 --> 00:05:36.220 found out that it was actually her best friend? 00:05:36.379 --> 00:05:39.040 And what about when you worked in, remember that 00:05:39.040 --> 00:05:41.019 time in the service and you were overseas? And 00:05:41.019 --> 00:05:46.040 I mean, that starts playing the tape. And then 00:05:46.040 --> 00:05:49.079 you just cover that back up. And then you push 00:05:49.079 --> 00:05:51.860 it down. And if the truth were known, probably 00:05:51.860 --> 00:05:54.939 some depression and physical issues and unresolved 00:05:54.939 --> 00:05:58.160 conflict has been brewing for years and years 00:05:58.160 --> 00:06:01.329 and playing itself out. God says, I have a remedy. 00:06:01.709 --> 00:06:06.949 When you take bacteria that is growing and you 00:06:06.949 --> 00:06:09.970 take it out of the darkness and you bring it 00:06:09.970 --> 00:06:12.629 into sunlight, you know what happens? It dies. 00:06:12.850 --> 00:06:15.689 You just bring it into light. And the process 00:06:15.689 --> 00:06:18.230 of bringing those things into the light are given 00:06:18.230 --> 00:06:21.050 to us in James 4. It says, therefore, submit 00:06:21.050 --> 00:06:24.930 to God. You realize, okay, okay, I submit to 00:06:24.930 --> 00:06:27.569 you. And then notice that there's an enemy. Resist 00:06:27.569 --> 00:06:30.040 the devil. And he'll flee from you. You have 00:06:30.040 --> 00:06:33.540 to say, I'm in Christ. Did I blow it? Yes. Was 00:06:33.540 --> 00:06:37.240 it wrong? Yes. Am I ashamed of it? Yes. But I'm 00:06:37.240 --> 00:06:38.879 going to now bring, I'm going to submit to God. 00:06:38.980 --> 00:06:41.079 I'm going to resist the devil. I'm going to quote. 00:06:41.740 --> 00:06:44.040 Romans 8 .1, there is no condemnation for those 00:06:44.040 --> 00:06:45.899 that are in Christ Jesus. And then I'm gonna 00:06:45.899 --> 00:06:48.480 draw near to God instead of feeling like I don't 00:06:48.480 --> 00:06:51.060 deserve him and I can't come close. And he promises 00:06:51.060 --> 00:06:53.500 he's gonna draw near to me. Then I'm gonna start 00:06:53.500 --> 00:06:55.459 this process and it'll start with the external 00:06:55.459 --> 00:06:57.740 things. And it says, cleanse your hands, you 00:06:57.740 --> 00:06:59.540 sinners, purify your hearts, you double -minded. 00:06:59.920 --> 00:07:02.259 And so I'm gonna look at the outward things that 00:07:02.259 --> 00:07:04.370 I've done. And then I'm gonna look at the motives 00:07:04.370 --> 00:07:06.529 of the heart. And then I'm gonna allow it to 00:07:06.529 --> 00:07:09.110 emotionally get down to my gut and to my soul. 00:07:09.350 --> 00:07:12.410 Lament and mourn and weep. I'm gonna embrace 00:07:12.410 --> 00:07:15.149 the emotions and the pain and the grief of what 00:07:15.149 --> 00:07:18.269 I've done against God. It's a Psalm 51 moment. 00:07:18.389 --> 00:07:21.730 Against you and you only have I sinned. God, 00:07:21.829 --> 00:07:26.170 forgive me. Forgive me. I'm sorry. And then notice 00:07:26.170 --> 00:07:29.839 what happens. Turn your mourning. and your joy 00:07:29.839 --> 00:07:32.920 to gloom. It's a process. And this is describing 00:07:32.920 --> 00:07:36.120 humbling yourself on the side of God. And what's 00:07:36.120 --> 00:07:40.939 the promise? He will lift you up. But until you 00:07:40.939 --> 00:07:43.300 come clean, until you get the secret out in the 00:07:43.300 --> 00:07:47.379 open, in fact, later in James 5, until we confess 00:07:47.379 --> 00:07:50.199 our sins to one another, you don't get healed. 00:07:51.160 --> 00:07:55.970 Had a man in our church in California. And man, 00:07:56.050 --> 00:07:57.990 it was just like, as a pastor, you meet these 00:07:57.990 --> 00:07:59.910 guys and he's just a with it guy. And he was 00:07:59.910 --> 00:08:02.870 committed and he was driving about 35 or 40 miles 00:08:02.870 --> 00:08:05.649 to church. I said, Andy, can't you find something 00:08:05.649 --> 00:08:07.689 a little closer? He goes, look, I commute 55 00:08:07.689 --> 00:08:10.569 minutes to work. God is speaking to me. He's 00:08:10.569 --> 00:08:12.129 speaking to my kids. He had like four or five 00:08:12.129 --> 00:08:14.709 kids. And he said, we are all growing. It's worth 00:08:14.709 --> 00:08:16.689 the trip. I said, well, I mean, okay, but I mean, 00:08:16.709 --> 00:08:19.160 I'm just thinking. There's got to be a church 00:08:19.160 --> 00:08:21.540 closer for you and et cetera. He said, no, no. 00:08:21.720 --> 00:08:23.060 And I mean, you know, it's just one of those 00:08:23.060 --> 00:08:24.720 guys where you met him and boy, he's growing. 00:08:24.860 --> 00:08:26.860 He's in the scriptures and pretty soon he's involved 00:08:26.860 --> 00:08:29.199 in ministry. And, you know, you just dream about 00:08:29.199 --> 00:08:31.259 this as a pastor. These really solid people that 00:08:31.259 --> 00:08:33.399 can make a huge difference and they do. And ministries 00:08:33.399 --> 00:08:34.899 get built around them and you become friends 00:08:34.899 --> 00:08:37.940 with them. And he said, hey, can I get some time 00:08:37.940 --> 00:08:40.600 with you? I said, sure. He said, I need to do 00:08:40.600 --> 00:08:42.720 something. I said, fine. So we came to my office 00:08:42.720 --> 00:08:44.600 and grabbed a cup of coffee and sat down. And, 00:08:44.620 --> 00:08:47.399 you know, he's kind of shaking. I'm going. Andy, 00:08:47.440 --> 00:08:50.019 what's wrong? He said, the last four months, 00:08:50.100 --> 00:08:52.840 I've been traveling secretly to another city. 00:08:53.220 --> 00:08:56.059 And I'm thinking, oh, man, you know. I said, 00:08:56.080 --> 00:08:57.659 so what's going on? He said, well, it's been 00:08:57.659 --> 00:09:01.480 going on for over 30 years. He's in his mid -40s. 00:09:02.200 --> 00:09:04.759 He said, it started when I was seven years old, 00:09:04.840 --> 00:09:07.500 and these magazines would come in. I mean, it 00:09:07.500 --> 00:09:11.080 was like the Sears catalog. And, you know, I 00:09:11.080 --> 00:09:13.100 was just a kid, but I found the lingerie section. 00:09:14.000 --> 00:09:17.000 And it was like a magnet. And then I was about 00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:20.919 12 or 13, and I don't know, accident or what, 00:09:20.980 --> 00:09:23.620 but my dad kept Playboys in between the mattresses. 00:09:24.580 --> 00:09:28.500 And I had a steady diet of those. By the time 00:09:28.500 --> 00:09:31.299 I was in my late teens, I kind of moved and progressed 00:09:31.299 --> 00:09:34.799 to some hardcore stuff. I've never told anyone 00:09:34.799 --> 00:09:38.299 this. I've been living with this for 30 years. 00:09:39.659 --> 00:09:43.059 The Internet has been killing me the last decade. 00:09:43.610 --> 00:09:47.090 There's stuff and access that, he said, it's 00:09:47.090 --> 00:09:49.509 like a thirsty man that I just, I can only go 00:09:49.509 --> 00:09:51.769 hours without going and logging on the internet. 00:09:52.669 --> 00:09:55.129 And the guilt that I've lived with and the turmoil 00:09:55.129 --> 00:09:58.570 inside, I can't even explain to anyone. And so 00:09:58.570 --> 00:10:02.429 I heard about, you know, one of these sexual 00:10:02.429 --> 00:10:04.509 addiction groups, kind of a celebrate recovery 00:10:04.509 --> 00:10:07.870 type thing in this church about 65 miles away 00:10:07.870 --> 00:10:09.330 because I didn't want to do anything near us. 00:10:09.870 --> 00:10:11.909 And once a week for the last four months, I've 00:10:11.909 --> 00:10:14.429 been driving there. And I got the secret out 00:10:14.429 --> 00:10:17.809 in the open. And something broke inside of me. 00:10:17.970 --> 00:10:20.850 And I wept with other men with the same problem. 00:10:21.409 --> 00:10:25.669 And I have been clean now for not just this four 00:10:25.669 --> 00:10:30.470 months, but a pretty good season of time afterwards. 00:10:31.830 --> 00:10:34.370 Now I've shared all this with my wife. It was 00:10:34.370 --> 00:10:38.009 horrendous. Boy, do I have a godly woman. And 00:10:38.009 --> 00:10:41.009 he said, now after this season, I feel like... 00:10:42.139 --> 00:10:43.620 You know, I don't know about the statistics, 00:10:43.720 --> 00:10:47.120 but probably 25 to 30 % of the men in our church 00:10:47.120 --> 00:10:50.360 are dealing with this in some way. You're doing 00:10:50.360 --> 00:10:52.200 the series and I kind of see where you're going 00:10:52.200 --> 00:10:53.820 and you're going to talk about sexual purity. 00:10:54.299 --> 00:10:56.600 With your permission, I'd like to tell my story. 00:10:57.379 --> 00:10:59.519 And I've asked my wife to sit on the front row 00:10:59.519 --> 00:11:01.539 because I need to apologize to her publicly. 00:11:02.519 --> 00:11:07.019 Now, don't get me wrong. I really knew this guy 00:11:07.019 --> 00:11:10.100 and we prayed about it and I will never forget. 00:11:11.840 --> 00:11:13.919 got to a certain point in the message, and rather 00:11:13.919 --> 00:11:15.559 than giving an illustration, I said, you know, 00:11:15.639 --> 00:11:17.679 I just want to stop for a moment. Andy, would 00:11:17.679 --> 00:11:20.740 you come up? Super respected in the church. He 00:11:20.740 --> 00:11:22.259 had a little thing, something he'd like to share. 00:11:22.759 --> 00:11:25.460 And I just came over here. And Andy told his 00:11:25.460 --> 00:11:29.279 story. And with tears streaming down his face, 00:11:29.480 --> 00:11:34.500 he apologized to his wife and his kids. And at 00:11:34.500 --> 00:11:37.580 the end of that, I said, you know, we need to 00:11:37.580 --> 00:11:41.870 get secrets out. Whoever has an issue like this 00:11:41.870 --> 00:11:44.429 in your life, Andy's going to be here tonight, 00:11:44.590 --> 00:11:47.690 and we're going to start some shoot it straight, 00:11:47.830 --> 00:11:51.669 small group, sexual addiction for men. We launched 00:11:51.669 --> 00:11:55.009 five groups that night. It multiplied after that. 00:11:55.409 --> 00:11:57.929 I told the story and had people calling me from 00:11:57.929 --> 00:11:59.929 all over the country, and all I do is I say, 00:11:59.990 --> 00:12:02.029 Andy, can I have permission? Because he's gifted 00:12:02.029 --> 00:12:04.070 organizationally. I say, can I have permission 00:12:04.070 --> 00:12:07.360 to just give your name? He's launched now. groups 00:12:07.360 --> 00:12:11.679 all over the country. God has taken his greatest 00:12:11.679 --> 00:12:16.899 secret and pain and sin and not only forgiven 00:12:16.899 --> 00:12:21.379 him, but restored him and used the thing that 00:12:21.379 --> 00:12:24.639 was the worst in his life to become the conduit 00:12:24.639 --> 00:12:29.320 of grace for others. What's your secret? What 00:12:29.320 --> 00:12:32.200 is it in your past? Is there something that you'd 00:12:32.200 --> 00:12:34.580 never want anyone else to know that needs to 00:12:34.580 --> 00:12:37.570 come to the surface? that you need to bring to 00:12:37.570 --> 00:12:39.950 God first and foremost, submit to him, resist 00:12:39.950 --> 00:12:41.929 the devil, draw near to God, cleanse your hands, 00:12:42.009 --> 00:12:44.870 purify your hearts, mourn, humble yourself, and 00:12:44.870 --> 00:12:47.730 let him lift you up. And then share that in an 00:12:47.730 --> 00:12:50.490 appropriate place with a safe person who's very 00:12:50.490 --> 00:12:54.870 mature so God could bring healing to you and 00:12:54.870 --> 00:12:58.190 then use it as a redeeming, powerful ministry 00:12:58.190 --> 00:13:02.789 to others. We'll hear more from Chip Ingram's 00:13:02.789 --> 00:13:05.279 message in just a moment. First, we're inviting 00:13:05.279 --> 00:13:08.100 you to multiply your year -end donation through 00:13:08.100 --> 00:13:10.799 an exciting match that's active right now. Because 00:13:10.799 --> 00:13:13.399 of the match, your donation will be matched dollar 00:13:13.399 --> 00:13:15.700 for dollar in the month of December. And when 00:13:15.700 --> 00:13:18.700 you support this match, you're not funding yesterday's 00:13:18.700 --> 00:13:21.440 methods. You're investing in a discipleship strategy 00:13:21.440 --> 00:13:24.559 that actually reaches the smartphone generation 00:13:24.559 --> 00:13:28.559 right where they are. Will you give to the next 00:13:28.559 --> 00:13:31.639 generation? Double the impact of your gift at 00:13:31.639 --> 00:13:35.440 livingontheedge .org. from his series called 00:13:35.440 --> 00:13:38.940 Leaving a Legacy That Lasts Forever. Again, our 00:13:38.940 --> 00:13:41.559 Bible teacher, Chip Ingram. Do you ever hear 00:13:41.559 --> 00:13:43.360 the Apostle Paul when he gets real personal in 00:13:43.360 --> 00:13:47.299 the New Testament? I'm chief among sinners. And 00:13:47.299 --> 00:13:49.539 God revealed himself to the apostles and also 00:13:49.539 --> 00:13:54.320 to me as one unworthy. It was his depth of understanding 00:13:54.320 --> 00:13:58.629 of owning his stuff. See, grace doesn't mean 00:13:58.629 --> 00:14:00.830 much if it's a little word that says, I'm saved 00:14:00.830 --> 00:14:02.970 by grace. I believe in Jesus. I went to a camp. 00:14:02.990 --> 00:14:05.149 I raised my hand. I got baptized. Yippee -doo, 00:14:05.309 --> 00:14:07.230 yippee -doo. Now I try and be a good moral person. 00:14:07.350 --> 00:14:09.470 And in my functional Christianity, I realize 00:14:09.470 --> 00:14:11.049 there's a big blackboard in the sky. Good deeds, 00:14:11.129 --> 00:14:12.710 bad deeds. When I do, do, do, do, do, I feel 00:14:12.710 --> 00:14:13.909 good, good, good. When I bad, bad, bad, bad, 00:14:13.990 --> 00:14:15.669 I feel bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. So I will try 00:14:15.669 --> 00:14:17.149 really, really hard. I get really exhausted. 00:14:17.210 --> 00:14:19.149 I have to hide a number of things. And it doesn't 00:14:19.149 --> 00:14:20.429 feel really good. I know I'm supposed to be a 00:14:20.429 --> 00:14:23.860 good guy, but, but, but, but. That's American 00:14:23.860 --> 00:14:26.120 and much of Christianity around the world. It 00:14:26.120 --> 00:14:28.240 is not supernatural. It is not Christianity. 00:14:28.559 --> 00:14:30.700 It is performance -oriented. It is not grace. 00:14:31.419 --> 00:14:36.299 Grace produces powerful life change from the 00:14:36.299 --> 00:14:41.980 inside out. Third, teach them to refuse to continue 00:14:41.980 --> 00:14:44.320 living with a performance orientation in their 00:14:44.320 --> 00:14:47.419 relationship with God. It is and always will 00:14:47.419 --> 00:14:52.330 be a grace orientation. Sometimes when we think 00:14:52.330 --> 00:14:55.450 about grace, it's still hard to kind of get your 00:14:55.450 --> 00:14:58.370 arms around. There's a lot of Bible words like 00:14:58.370 --> 00:15:02.289 that, you know? And sometimes a word picture 00:15:02.289 --> 00:15:05.190 gets it. So here's a word picture. Here's what 00:15:05.190 --> 00:15:10.149 grace is. If in your flesh and frailty as a human 00:15:10.149 --> 00:15:14.629 being, you make a mistake and you fall into a 00:15:14.629 --> 00:15:17.350 10 -foot hole. and you're looking up and it's 00:15:17.350 --> 00:15:20.049 a 10 -foot hole and there's no way to get out 00:15:20.049 --> 00:15:24.730 of this thing. Grace is God will extend an 11 00:15:24.730 --> 00:15:28.389 -foot rope with knots on it and you sit on the 00:15:28.389 --> 00:15:30.509 little chair at the end and he'll pull you up 00:15:30.509 --> 00:15:33.610 out of it. But if you happen to be one of those 00:15:33.610 --> 00:15:37.789 people that makes even a huge mistake and you 00:15:37.789 --> 00:15:42.129 drop into a 99 -foot hole, and you can barely 00:15:42.129 --> 00:15:44.490 see the light, and there's, I mean, there was 00:15:44.490 --> 00:15:46.490 no way out of the 10 -foot hole, but this is, 00:15:46.490 --> 00:15:50.629 there's not even any hope. God will drop a 100 00:15:50.629 --> 00:15:55.330 -foot rope with knots in it with a little wooden 00:15:55.330 --> 00:15:57.429 thing that you can sit on, and he will pull you 00:15:57.429 --> 00:16:03.830 up. That's what grace is. It is all that you 00:16:03.830 --> 00:16:11.929 need. Paul, my grace is sufficient for you. Grace 00:16:11.929 --> 00:16:16.590 extends a foot beyond whatever your need is. 00:16:17.850 --> 00:16:21.370 Totally apart from your performance. Totally 00:16:21.370 --> 00:16:23.929 apart from what you could earn, try hard, get 00:16:23.929 --> 00:16:26.269 back together. If I'm really good, well, maybe 00:16:26.269 --> 00:16:29.450 then. All that thinking. And I will just tell 00:16:29.450 --> 00:16:32.049 you, I think it's a very long journey, especially 00:16:32.049 --> 00:16:34.490 if you're goal -oriented, fairly strategic, happen 00:16:34.490 --> 00:16:38.090 to be driven, a little OCD. came from a legalistic 00:16:38.090 --> 00:16:40.389 background. Can I continue, or you got the idea? 00:16:42.250 --> 00:16:45.210 Let me give you a couple tools that might be 00:16:45.210 --> 00:16:50.070 helpful. One for me, as I realized, it's so deeply 00:16:50.070 --> 00:16:53.049 embedded in me, my performance orientation. I 00:16:53.049 --> 00:16:55.769 feel close to God when I'm doing good. My emotions, 00:16:55.870 --> 00:16:57.750 I tend not to feel close to God when I'm doing 00:16:57.750 --> 00:17:01.490 bad. Left to myself, I will think, well, I'll 00:17:01.490 --> 00:17:03.389 read. I used to be, when I was a young Christian, 00:17:03.509 --> 00:17:05.450 like if I missed a day, I'd have to read that 00:17:05.450 --> 00:17:07.049 many more chapters to kind of get it back level 00:17:07.049 --> 00:17:10.509 again, you know? But that mentality, I mean, 00:17:10.549 --> 00:17:13.990 it's so deep in me. And I realized what needed 00:17:13.990 --> 00:17:15.970 to change was not my behavior, but my thinking. 00:17:16.670 --> 00:17:19.369 And so I began to take, these are called desire 00:17:19.369 --> 00:17:21.970 cards. And I just thought, I'm not going to try 00:17:21.970 --> 00:17:23.950 and memorize them. I need to learn to think in 00:17:23.950 --> 00:17:27.109 a new way. And so I began to begin to think of 00:17:27.109 --> 00:17:30.349 ways that I could begin to think. and reorient 00:17:30.349 --> 00:17:33.329 my mind around what is true in relationships 00:17:33.329 --> 00:17:36.130 and with me and with God. And so I desire to 00:17:36.130 --> 00:17:38.390 communicate unconditional love and acceptance 00:17:38.390 --> 00:17:41.130 toward my children regardless of their performance. 00:17:41.329 --> 00:17:42.329 I thought, you know, if I could learn how to 00:17:42.329 --> 00:17:43.609 do it with my kids, maybe I'd get it myself. 00:17:44.150 --> 00:17:47.410 And then I said, I desire to please God and find 00:17:47.410 --> 00:17:50.369 my worth and security in Him rather than seeking 00:17:50.369 --> 00:17:52.509 to please people to get their affirmation in 00:17:52.509 --> 00:17:54.940 ministry. Because, see, what I realized was is, 00:17:54.960 --> 00:17:56.900 you know, if I had a good sermon and people said, 00:17:56.960 --> 00:17:58.619 oh, that was really good. Oh, good, good, good. 00:17:58.799 --> 00:18:00.339 Oh, that wasn't a very good sermon. Oh, really 00:18:00.339 --> 00:18:02.720 bad, bad, bad, bad. And I would live like this. 00:18:02.740 --> 00:18:06.099 Anybody do that? See, that's a lack of understanding 00:18:06.099 --> 00:18:08.640 of grace. And my point is you can write down 00:18:08.640 --> 00:18:10.720 what's for you. These are ones I've been, and 00:18:10.720 --> 00:18:12.359 I just read them over. Put them on the bed stand. 00:18:12.519 --> 00:18:15.240 Just read them over. No pressure. I mean, when 00:18:15.240 --> 00:18:17.240 I first wrote them, I wrote them as goals. Ingram, 00:18:17.339 --> 00:18:19.299 right? My goal is to be more grace -oriented. 00:18:19.380 --> 00:18:20.940 Wait a minute, Ingram. A goal is something you 00:18:20.940 --> 00:18:24.150 can, it's a desire. My desire is to focus on 00:18:24.150 --> 00:18:26.869 my faithfulness to God rather than my success 00:18:26.869 --> 00:18:30.150 in ministry. Just read that over. My desire is 00:18:30.150 --> 00:18:33.390 to enjoy my relationship with Jesus Christ each 00:18:33.390 --> 00:18:37.170 and every day. I realized I was getting, hey, 00:18:37.190 --> 00:18:38.769 Lord, you know what? Aren't you glad I'm on your 00:18:38.769 --> 00:18:42.329 team? I get a lot done. I mean, I get a lot done. 00:18:42.509 --> 00:18:44.109 I mean, hey, give me the ball. I'll run it. I 00:18:44.109 --> 00:18:47.109 get a lot done. And it was like, Chip, lighten 00:18:47.109 --> 00:18:50.609 up. I want you to enjoy me. And I jotted Psalm 00:18:50.609 --> 00:18:53.730 1611. You've made known to me the path of life, 00:18:53.829 --> 00:18:56.829 and your presence is fullness of joy, and at 00:18:56.829 --> 00:18:59.789 your right hand are pleasures forever. To enjoy 00:18:59.789 --> 00:19:02.769 God, to not get anything done when you're in 00:19:02.769 --> 00:19:05.690 his presence always. My desire is to allow my 00:19:05.690 --> 00:19:07.910 children the freedom to fail, to make our home 00:19:07.910 --> 00:19:10.650 a pressure -free environment. And they will tell 00:19:10.650 --> 00:19:12.589 you, Dad, you really need a little bit more work 00:19:12.589 --> 00:19:14.930 on that, but you're not like you used to be. 00:19:15.289 --> 00:19:17.950 My desire is to have some good fun once or twice 00:19:17.950 --> 00:19:20.990 a week, limiting my work hours to 55 or 60 hours. 00:19:21.740 --> 00:19:24.380 See, part of that performance orientation creates 00:19:24.380 --> 00:19:26.759 a workaholic. A workaholic works not because 00:19:26.759 --> 00:19:28.779 he needs to work. He works because he's filling 00:19:28.779 --> 00:19:31.539 up the holes in his heart to say, I'm really 00:19:31.539 --> 00:19:34.440 okay. And that's a lack of understanding of grace 00:19:34.440 --> 00:19:37.220 in my identity in Christ. So I have to write 00:19:37.220 --> 00:19:40.079 down, have fun, Chip. Don't feel guilty when 00:19:40.079 --> 00:19:42.880 you play nine holes. I mean, don't feel guilty 00:19:42.880 --> 00:19:46.039 when you sit back and, you know, get a Diet Coke 00:19:46.039 --> 00:19:49.319 and get some of that sharp cheese and those Triscuits 00:19:49.319 --> 00:19:51.339 you like and put your feet up and watch the Dallas 00:19:51.339 --> 00:19:55.660 Cowboys and enjoy it. I mean, of course I need 00:19:55.660 --> 00:19:57.559 to limit the media, but my lens, like there's 00:19:57.559 --> 00:20:00.819 great movies and there's times to sit back, relax, 00:20:01.039 --> 00:20:04.160 enjoy, and it brings this balance. You tracking 00:20:04.160 --> 00:20:07.660 with me? Final one here is my desire is to worship 00:20:07.660 --> 00:20:11.279 God for who he is and praise and adoration. at 00:20:11.279 --> 00:20:15.599 least once every day. I got to the point where 00:20:15.599 --> 00:20:17.579 when I met with God, it was, okay, let's get 00:20:17.579 --> 00:20:18.779 something done here. Who do you want me to pray 00:20:18.779 --> 00:20:25.980 for? Another tool along with the cards, I didn't 00:20:25.980 --> 00:20:28.380 used to do this, but what I found is I lied to 00:20:28.380 --> 00:20:31.920 myself and I needed to be reminded of God's grace. 00:20:32.079 --> 00:20:37.700 And this is a super duper, like 599, just little 00:20:37.700 --> 00:20:43.180 notebook. whereas I just try and be more honest. 00:20:43.420 --> 00:20:46.240 And I find when I write it out, it's harder to 00:20:46.240 --> 00:20:49.299 lie to myself. And I just got in the habit of 00:20:49.299 --> 00:20:52.640 writing out what I really think and what I really 00:20:52.640 --> 00:20:56.599 feel and when I'm really mad and when I'm really 00:20:56.599 --> 00:21:01.480 afraid and when I'm really hurting. And they 00:21:01.480 --> 00:21:04.960 often start out, yesterday started poorly, ended 00:21:04.960 --> 00:21:07.859 well. It seemed like all of life was pressing 00:21:07.859 --> 00:21:09.940 against me yesterday. I was angry and disturbed 00:21:09.940 --> 00:21:15.119 and very frustrated. You know, I mean, for a 00:21:15.119 --> 00:21:18.099 guy like me, that's like you don't measure up. 00:21:18.299 --> 00:21:21.200 I mean, you need to be in control. I mean, you 00:21:21.200 --> 00:21:22.500 need to have it together. I mean, you got to 00:21:22.500 --> 00:21:25.400 get with the program. And this tool has helped 00:21:25.400 --> 00:21:28.799 me just come before God. See, grace always flows 00:21:28.799 --> 00:21:32.500 downhill. Grace always flows toward humility. 00:21:33.759 --> 00:21:39.460 Performance. Control is always rooted in pride. 00:21:40.359 --> 00:21:43.599 Now, there's responsibility that's healthy. But 00:21:43.599 --> 00:21:45.259 some of us feel like we've got to be in control 00:21:45.259 --> 00:21:48.000 and manage everything and manage outcomes. You 00:21:48.000 --> 00:21:51.799 can't. And so God's loving grace for some of 00:21:51.799 --> 00:21:53.619 us, well, he'll just keep overloading you until 00:21:53.619 --> 00:21:56.240 you can't handle it so that you come to this 00:21:56.240 --> 00:21:59.559 amazing discovery. I can't handle it. And I think 00:21:59.559 --> 00:22:01.539 God smiles, goes, well, it took a while, but 00:22:01.539 --> 00:22:05.279 you know, I've known that from day one. I want 00:22:05.279 --> 00:22:10.539 to help you. Oh, really? Yeah. You can do all 00:22:10.539 --> 00:22:13.660 things through Christ who gives you strength. 00:22:14.640 --> 00:22:17.839 So the life message here is you were created 00:22:17.839 --> 00:22:25.700 to receive grace and give grace. He's standing 00:22:25.700 --> 00:22:29.599 ready with open arms to help us as only God can. 00:22:29.920 --> 00:22:32.519 You're listening to Living on the Edge with Bible 00:22:32.519 --> 00:22:35.390 teacher Chip Ingram. We'll hear a closing comment 00:22:35.390 --> 00:22:38.329 from Chip in just a moment. This practical five 00:22:38.329 --> 00:22:41.349 -part series concludes today. To hear any of 00:22:41.349 --> 00:22:43.789 Chip's messages from this series or to order 00:22:43.789 --> 00:22:46.309 the companion resources to facilitate personal 00:22:46.309 --> 00:22:52.630 study, give us a call at 888 -333 -6003 or go 00:22:52.630 --> 00:22:55.789 to livingontheedge .org. Look for the series 00:22:55.789 --> 00:22:59.829 called Leaving a Legacy That Lasts Forever. Well, 00:22:59.849 --> 00:23:02.349 Chip, although we've been on radio for 30 years, 00:23:02.630 --> 00:23:04.769 we're finding that young listeners don't tune 00:23:04.769 --> 00:23:07.289 in this way. Instead, they're using new platforms 00:23:07.289 --> 00:23:10.190 and they're asking honest, vulnerable questions. 00:23:10.569 --> 00:23:12.829 You know, it's our role as parents and grandparents 00:23:12.829 --> 00:23:15.210 to bolster their confidence in the credibility 00:23:15.210 --> 00:23:18.809 of the Bible. Young adults today are asking questions 00:23:18.809 --> 00:23:22.460 their parents never ask. How do I know Christianity 00:23:22.460 --> 00:23:25.119 is true with so many other religions? You know, 00:23:25.140 --> 00:23:27.460 why does the Bible seem to contradict science? 00:23:27.579 --> 00:23:30.880 Or how can I trust a God who allows such suffering? 00:23:31.299 --> 00:23:33.779 These aren't rebellious questions. They're honest 00:23:33.779 --> 00:23:36.380 questions. And they deserve an honest answer, 00:23:36.519 --> 00:23:39.299 a thoughtful answer. Living on the edge doesn't 00:23:39.299 --> 00:23:42.039 shy away from the hard stuff. You might remember 00:23:42.039 --> 00:23:44.559 our series, Caring Enough to Confront, where 00:23:44.559 --> 00:23:48.160 we taught on abortion. politics the environment 00:23:48.160 --> 00:23:54.339 lgbtq porn heterosexual sin i mean if they don't 00:23:54.339 --> 00:23:57.140 hear god's perspective that is winsome and loving 00:23:57.140 --> 00:24:00.880 and clear and truthful how do we expect them 00:24:00.880 --> 00:24:04.640 to follow him we have to give answers with a 00:24:04.640 --> 00:24:08.039 spirit of kindness and love, but we have to shoot 00:24:08.039 --> 00:24:11.359 it straight. And by and large, that has not happened 00:24:11.359 --> 00:24:14.359 across America. This is where God is called living 00:24:14.359 --> 00:24:18.400 on the edge to step in and both be kind and winsome, 00:24:18.400 --> 00:24:21.759 but at the same time, tackle controversial issues 00:24:21.759 --> 00:24:25.440 in a way that's clear, that's biblical, that's 00:24:25.440 --> 00:24:28.000 relevant, and speaks to the heart of young people. 00:24:28.519 --> 00:24:31.339 When you give to this match, you're helping us 00:24:31.339 --> 00:24:35.119 get the Word of God to a group of people that 00:24:35.119 --> 00:24:38.720 are in desperate need of truth. but truth that's 00:24:38.720 --> 00:24:42.059 packaged in a way that says, I get you. I'm for 00:24:42.059 --> 00:24:45.359 you. Would you explore this with me? Each time 00:24:45.359 --> 00:24:47.259 you give to Living on the Edge until December 00:24:47.259 --> 00:24:50.759 31st, your gift is doubled because there's a 00:24:50.759 --> 00:24:53.099 group of people that say, I believe that we have 00:24:53.099 --> 00:24:55.839 to reach the next generation. And if people will 00:24:55.839 --> 00:24:59.019 give, I will give extra money to double it and 00:24:59.019 --> 00:25:01.890 double the impact. This is a critical time in 00:25:01.890 --> 00:25:04.230 our nation. It's a critical time in this generation. 00:25:04.549 --> 00:25:07.190 Will you stand with us? To respond to Chip Ingram 00:25:07.190 --> 00:25:12.289 right now, call 888 -333 -6003. If you prefer 00:25:12.289 --> 00:25:15.529 to give online, just go to livingontheedge .org. 00:25:16.109 --> 00:25:18.309 You know, many in our audience prefer to send 00:25:18.309 --> 00:25:20.549 a check in the mail. Now you can do that by addressing 00:25:20.549 --> 00:25:23.789 your envelope to Living on the Edge, P .O. Box 00:25:23.789 --> 00:25:29.579 3007, Atlanta, Georgia, 30024. Here's our phone 00:25:29.579 --> 00:25:34.180 number again, 888 -333 -6003, or give online 00:25:34.180 --> 00:25:39.500 at livingontheedge .org. As the pursuit of prosperity 00:25:39.500 --> 00:25:42.900 warn you out, I'm Dave Drewy, urging you to join 00:25:42.900 --> 00:25:45.599 us when Chip Ingram describes the biblical solution 00:25:45.599 --> 00:25:48.119 tomorrow on Living on the Edge.