WEBVTT 00:00:01.229 --> 00:00:04.070 We hear a lot today about reducing stress and 00:00:04.070 --> 00:00:06.250 the health benefits of living with less stress. 00:00:06.490 --> 00:00:09.410 The question is, how do you do it? How do you 00:00:09.410 --> 00:00:12.109 keep your cool when the pressure heats up? How 00:00:12.109 --> 00:00:15.109 do you stop stress before it starts? Don't go 00:00:15.109 --> 00:00:19.870 away. Thanks for being with us for this edition 00:00:19.870 --> 00:00:23.289 of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Chip 00:00:23.289 --> 00:00:25.809 serves as our Bible teacher for this global teaching 00:00:25.809 --> 00:00:28.370 and discipleship ministry, helping Christians 00:00:28.370 --> 00:00:31.839 develop an authentic faith. Well, in just a minute, 00:00:31.859 --> 00:00:34.079 you'll hear the second half of Chip's talk, Learning 00:00:34.079 --> 00:00:36.799 How to Stop Stress Before It Starts, which is 00:00:36.799 --> 00:00:39.420 from our series, Overcoming Emotions That Destroy. 00:00:39.920 --> 00:00:42.119 And be sure to keep listening after the teaching 00:00:42.119 --> 00:00:44.780 as Chip shares some additional insights that'll 00:00:44.780 --> 00:00:47.439 help you in your struggle to control anger. Don't 00:00:47.439 --> 00:00:49.899 miss it. Well, with all that said, here's Chip 00:00:49.899 --> 00:00:52.659 as he begins by continuing to unpack the ways 00:00:52.659 --> 00:00:57.000 we can minimize stress. Let's get going. Number 00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:01.390 four, admit mistakes and imperfections. If we 00:01:01.390 --> 00:01:04.750 could just liberate one another, one of the core 00:01:04.750 --> 00:01:07.030 values, we only have four at Living on the Edge, 00:01:07.189 --> 00:01:11.510 and we did it with the acronym L -O -T -E. And 00:01:11.510 --> 00:01:15.290 the L is for live it out. We just got to be what 00:01:15.290 --> 00:01:18.450 we want others to become. And the O is for own 00:01:18.450 --> 00:01:22.599 your stuff. Don't blame. Don't tell someone else. 00:01:22.739 --> 00:01:26.980 It wasn't on time. It was, you're late. I love 00:01:26.980 --> 00:01:29.420 it when someone says, one of the new guys that's 00:01:29.420 --> 00:01:33.719 working with us, and I get this email. Hey, Chip, 00:01:33.900 --> 00:01:37.000 sorry, man. Haven't done this in years. I thought 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:39.420 my plane was to leave at this time. It's no one 00:01:39.420 --> 00:01:42.099 else's fault. I didn't look at the thing. I missed 00:01:42.099 --> 00:01:45.079 my plane. I'll miss the meeting. I blew it. Sorry. 00:01:46.200 --> 00:01:48.859 I wrote him an email back. I said, hey, Rick, 00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.219 let me tell you this. You made my day. Thanks 00:01:52.219 --> 00:01:54.640 so much. You didn't tell me it was someone else's 00:01:54.640 --> 00:01:56.540 fault. You didn't tell me your assistant blew 00:01:56.540 --> 00:01:58.780 it. You didn't tell me that you'd renegotiated 00:01:58.780 --> 00:02:00.140 things and thought it might be better to come 00:02:00.140 --> 00:02:01.959 a second day, but you're really sorry. There 00:02:01.959 --> 00:02:04.599 was no smoke. There was no mirrors. You made 00:02:04.599 --> 00:02:07.060 a mistake. Welcome to the human race. You owned 00:02:07.060 --> 00:02:11.840 your stuff. Way to go. Keep it up. Do you realize 00:02:11.840 --> 00:02:15.699 how much stress? We're under to slightly bend 00:02:15.699 --> 00:02:18.639 the truth to say the traffic was really heavy. 00:02:18.699 --> 00:02:20.719 Of course it was very heavy and you left a half 00:02:20.719 --> 00:02:23.939 hour late, right? You know, you would really 00:02:23.939 --> 00:02:26.020 love to do it. You would never want to do that 00:02:26.020 --> 00:02:30.680 in a million years, right? But you can't. You 00:02:30.680 --> 00:02:35.400 know, just, you forgot. How about that one? You 00:02:35.400 --> 00:02:38.620 know, like, you know what? I forgot to call you 00:02:38.620 --> 00:02:40.939 back. There was one, I was checking my messages 00:02:40.939 --> 00:02:43.469 from somewhere and I thought, And I called the 00:02:43.469 --> 00:02:45.830 guy, and this is human, I think. I thought to 00:02:45.830 --> 00:02:50.909 myself, okay, I was busy. I was traveling. There's 00:02:50.909 --> 00:02:53.289 got to be a legitimate excuse. This is an important 00:02:53.289 --> 00:02:56.909 relationship, and it's been four days. And then 00:02:56.909 --> 00:03:00.110 God had this little thought from the Holy Spirit. 00:03:00.349 --> 00:03:04.090 Why don't you just tell him you forgot? Isn't 00:03:04.090 --> 00:03:06.789 that what happened? Yeah. That doesn't sound 00:03:06.789 --> 00:03:10.710 very spiritual, Lord. Yeah, I know. But is it 00:03:10.710 --> 00:03:13.650 the truth? Yeah. Do you think human beings ever 00:03:13.650 --> 00:03:17.050 forget, Chip? Yeah. Why don't you just tell him 00:03:17.050 --> 00:03:20.949 you forgot? Okay. So I called this guy, and I 00:03:20.949 --> 00:03:22.750 said, hey, is it really one of those real important 00:03:22.750 --> 00:03:24.909 type things? And I said, hi, this is Chip. And 00:03:24.909 --> 00:03:27.930 by the way, I realize it's been a number of days 00:03:27.930 --> 00:03:31.449 and, you know, sounded pretty urgent, and I just 00:03:31.449 --> 00:03:35.090 forgot. And, you know, the other end of the phone 00:03:35.090 --> 00:03:38.460 was. It wasn't like, you are a terrible person. 00:03:38.580 --> 00:03:40.860 You will now be sent to, if there's a purgatory, 00:03:41.039 --> 00:03:44.219 you will now go there. I mean, it was just, hey, 00:03:44.280 --> 00:03:49.419 man, I understand. What happens? Admit your mistakes. 00:03:50.340 --> 00:03:53.979 Five, laugh more often. Don't take life or yourself 00:03:53.979 --> 00:03:57.979 so seriously. Proverbs 17 .22 says, a cheerful 00:03:57.979 --> 00:04:00.780 heart is good medicine. I mean, the people that 00:04:00.780 --> 00:04:04.580 I know that have inspired me and helped me. have 00:04:04.580 --> 00:04:07.039 a great sense of humor, and they laugh, and they 00:04:07.039 --> 00:04:09.840 have fun. And I just want to encourage you to, 00:04:09.879 --> 00:04:12.319 a lot of the anger, a lot of the stress will 00:04:12.319 --> 00:04:15.439 leave when you just lighten up a little bit and 00:04:15.439 --> 00:04:18.889 enjoy yourself. Number six is take care of yourself. 00:04:19.209 --> 00:04:21.029 I mean, this is one that, you know, you almost 00:04:21.029 --> 00:04:22.670 don't want to say because it's going to go over 00:04:22.670 --> 00:04:24.430 the top, but I'll just say it just so I can have 00:04:24.430 --> 00:04:27.209 good stewardship, is you need enough rest, you 00:04:27.209 --> 00:04:29.389 need to eat good food, and you need to work out 00:04:29.389 --> 00:04:31.529 enough to keep your body in shape. And when you 00:04:31.529 --> 00:04:33.389 don't do those things, when you don't have very 00:04:33.389 --> 00:04:35.610 much rest, when you eat stuff that's no good 00:04:35.610 --> 00:04:39.149 for you, and you don't do any kind of exercising, 00:04:39.529 --> 00:04:42.050 you're going to be angry more often. It's just 00:04:42.050 --> 00:04:46.389 the way it is. Less sleep, less energy. And, 00:04:46.430 --> 00:04:47.730 you know, I don't think everyone has to be, quote, 00:04:47.810 --> 00:04:50.449 a health nut, but I think you ought to ask yourself, 00:04:50.670 --> 00:04:53.670 if this really is the temple of God, 1 Corinthians 00:04:53.670 --> 00:04:56.790 6, 19, 20, if this really is the temple of God, 00:04:56.970 --> 00:05:01.079 am I treating it like God's temple? And then, 00:05:01.100 --> 00:05:02.800 you know, you just start slow with where you're 00:05:02.800 --> 00:05:04.720 at and start putting more good stuff instead 00:05:04.720 --> 00:05:06.959 of bad stuff in your body. And if you've never 00:05:06.959 --> 00:05:08.939 jogged or anything, you just start walking and 00:05:08.939 --> 00:05:11.519 just little by little by little, but you take 00:05:11.519 --> 00:05:13.879 care of yourself and you'll just find your anger. 00:05:13.980 --> 00:05:16.579 By the way, a lot of people that have not good 00:05:16.579 --> 00:05:20.540 eating habits and don't work out, guess who you're 00:05:20.540 --> 00:05:27.779 angry at? Yeah. My background in undergraduate 00:05:27.779 --> 00:05:30.899 and grad work, I did. in undergrad, but then 00:05:30.899 --> 00:05:33.259 in just a few classes in grad work in psychology. 00:05:33.579 --> 00:05:35.480 And there's this weird thing, the way our minds 00:05:35.480 --> 00:05:37.720 work, is that when people don't like themselves 00:05:37.720 --> 00:05:40.500 or they feel guilty or bad, they feel like they 00:05:40.500 --> 00:05:42.660 need to punish themselves. And we will actually 00:05:42.660 --> 00:05:48.220 create behaviors to produce outcomes to equalize 00:05:48.220 --> 00:05:51.579 things inside of us. And so people will eat and 00:05:51.579 --> 00:05:54.480 do things that are bad for them that create outcomes 00:05:54.480 --> 00:05:57.139 that sort of say, well, this is the kind of person 00:05:57.139 --> 00:06:00.279 I am. This is what I deserve. Now, as weird as 00:06:00.279 --> 00:06:02.879 that sounds, it's true. But take care of yourself. 00:06:03.339 --> 00:06:06.060 You matter. You're important. You're precious. 00:06:06.300 --> 00:06:09.319 You're loved. And then finally, know what triggers 00:06:09.319 --> 00:06:11.439 your anger. And let me give you an acronym here, 00:06:11.680 --> 00:06:16.439 H -A -L -T. Halt. When you're hungry, angry, 00:06:16.779 --> 00:06:22.939 lonely, or tired, stop. Halt. Don't make a big 00:06:22.939 --> 00:06:25.639 decision. Don't go anywhere. Don't try and take 00:06:25.639 --> 00:06:28.480 on something. And I guess what I got from that 00:06:28.480 --> 00:06:32.980 acronym is what I found is when I'm hungry, I'm 00:06:32.980 --> 00:06:37.579 a lot un -nice to be with, right? I'm angry. 00:06:37.660 --> 00:06:40.819 When I'm lonely, my anger quotient goes up. When 00:06:40.819 --> 00:06:44.000 I'm tired, you don't even want to go there, right? 00:06:44.240 --> 00:06:47.100 And so I just want to encourage you some real 00:06:47.100 --> 00:06:53.439 practical learnings about your AQ, your anger 00:06:53.439 --> 00:06:55.819 quotient. It's going to be your environment. 00:06:56.399 --> 00:06:59.660 That's what we talked about here, plus your perspective. 00:06:59.740 --> 00:07:03.000 We'll look at that in just a second. That's times 00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:07.639 obedience to 426 is in real life. These are things 00:07:07.639 --> 00:07:10.819 that will minimize the stress and help you with 00:07:10.819 --> 00:07:14.279 your AQ. The E is you minimize stress. To get 00:07:14.279 --> 00:07:17.259 the right perspective, you want to maximize God. 00:07:17.540 --> 00:07:21.370 You want to get a high, clear view of God. Let 00:07:21.370 --> 00:07:25.129 me give you six things here to maximize or enlarge 00:07:25.129 --> 00:07:27.569 your perspective. This is what I call spiritual 00:07:27.569 --> 00:07:30.910 wisdom. Number one, get right with God. Believe 00:07:30.910 --> 00:07:33.769 in Him, confess your sins, and forgive others. 00:07:35.290 --> 00:07:38.649 Whatever chance you're here and you don't know 00:07:38.649 --> 00:07:41.569 Christ personally, don't leave this campus until 00:07:41.569 --> 00:07:44.250 you put your faith in Christ, allow Him to forgive 00:07:44.250 --> 00:07:47.129 your sins, and give you a peace that's indescribable 00:07:47.129 --> 00:07:51.740 and a power that's within you. If you are a believer 00:07:51.740 --> 00:07:54.839 here, then take to heart, submit therefore to 00:07:54.839 --> 00:07:59.560 God, resist the devil, he'll flee from you. Submission, 00:07:59.660 --> 00:08:03.160 anything you know that God wants you to do or 00:08:03.160 --> 00:08:05.899 to act on that you're not is called lack of submission. 00:08:06.160 --> 00:08:09.500 You want to say to God, all that I am, all that 00:08:09.500 --> 00:08:12.459 I have is yours. And if he's been speaking to 00:08:12.459 --> 00:08:14.399 you about dealing with anger, dealing with your 00:08:14.399 --> 00:08:17.620 marriage, dealing with an alcohol issue, dealing 00:08:17.620 --> 00:08:20.120 with prescription drugs, dealing with forgiving 00:08:20.120 --> 00:08:24.100 someone in the past, just do it. You'll be amazed. 00:08:24.519 --> 00:08:27.600 Things will submit therefore to God, resist the 00:08:27.600 --> 00:08:29.899 devil, he'll flee from you. Then notice, draw 00:08:29.899 --> 00:08:32.460 near to God and he'll draw near to you. And then 00:08:32.460 --> 00:08:33.779 he talks about, well, what's it mean to draw 00:08:33.779 --> 00:08:35.940 near to God? Cleanse your hands, you sinners, 00:08:36.019 --> 00:08:38.320 and purify your hearts, you double -minded. And 00:08:38.320 --> 00:08:40.580 then he's gonna go on in the passage, in this 00:08:40.580 --> 00:08:43.059 passage later on and talk about, this is the 00:08:43.059 --> 00:08:45.820 picture of humbling yourself before God so that 00:08:45.820 --> 00:08:49.889 he can come and lift you up and help you. God 00:08:49.889 --> 00:08:53.470 is not an angry, mean God whose arms are crossed 00:08:53.470 --> 00:08:57.049 with a bony finger and a tapping toe that thinks 00:08:57.049 --> 00:08:59.309 you have messed up and you're messing up again. 00:08:59.450 --> 00:09:01.529 And he wants to whack you on sort of your spiritual 00:09:01.529 --> 00:09:04.210 knuckles and saying, get with the program. He 00:09:04.210 --> 00:09:07.549 is not down on you. He loves you. He's for you. 00:09:07.669 --> 00:09:11.649 He died for you. Now, certain behaviors and certain 00:09:11.649 --> 00:09:14.669 stiff arming of God will bring about what I call 00:09:14.669 --> 00:09:16.789 Hebrews 12, the velvet vice of consequences. 00:09:17.549 --> 00:09:20.789 He loves you so much that when you are living 00:09:20.789 --> 00:09:23.710 in a way that's contrary to your best and his 00:09:23.710 --> 00:09:26.669 word, he will begin to bring consequences into 00:09:26.669 --> 00:09:29.710 your life. And it can come in finances and relationships. 00:09:30.330 --> 00:09:33.230 It can come in your kids. It can come in your 00:09:33.230 --> 00:09:37.610 health. He just wants to say, hello, I love you. 00:09:38.490 --> 00:09:41.090 And some of us, we keep thinking, why are all 00:09:41.090 --> 00:09:44.570 these things happening to me? Just stop. and 00:09:44.570 --> 00:09:46.529 say, is there anything in my life that needs 00:09:46.529 --> 00:09:50.129 to be realigned with what I know is true? And 00:09:50.129 --> 00:09:52.909 the perspective that you'll get and the peace 00:09:52.909 --> 00:09:55.769 that you'll receive. Some people have someone 00:09:55.769 --> 00:09:57.970 that's wounded you. You just need the last line. 00:09:58.049 --> 00:10:00.309 You need to forgive them. Release them. God's 00:10:00.309 --> 00:10:03.379 a fair judge. He knows all things. The reason 00:10:03.379 --> 00:10:05.159 we don't want to release people is, well, I'm 00:10:05.159 --> 00:10:06.539 taking them off the hook. You're not taking them 00:10:06.539 --> 00:10:08.419 off the hook. Vengeance is mine, says the Lord. 00:10:08.559 --> 00:10:11.179 Tell you what, if God's absolutely fair and he's 00:10:11.179 --> 00:10:13.799 all wise and he knows all things, actual and 00:10:13.799 --> 00:10:16.019 possible, he knows why the person did it, what 00:10:16.019 --> 00:10:18.019 the circumstances were, you just say, God, I'll 00:10:18.019 --> 00:10:20.059 tell you what, either I'm going to be the referee 00:10:20.059 --> 00:10:23.720 or you're going to be the referee. I don't know 00:10:23.720 --> 00:10:25.620 the whole story. I'm going to give this person 00:10:25.620 --> 00:10:29.600 to you. And then here's what's helped me. Now, 00:10:29.639 --> 00:10:33.370 God. When I really have been really honest about 00:10:33.370 --> 00:10:37.129 stuff in me, I do not want to get what I deserve. 00:10:38.389 --> 00:10:42.110 I mean, not at all. And we're going to talk about 00:10:42.110 --> 00:10:45.610 this later, but it is, if I'm going to receive 00:10:45.610 --> 00:10:49.769 your mercy, Ephesians 4 .32, be kind to one another, 00:10:49.850 --> 00:10:52.529 tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as 00:10:52.529 --> 00:10:56.929 God also has forgiven you. But get right with 00:10:56.929 --> 00:11:01.419 God. Your perspective, your life. A half -hearted, 00:11:01.600 --> 00:11:05.360 partially in, partially out relationship with 00:11:05.360 --> 00:11:08.100 Jesus Christ is the most miserable people on 00:11:08.100 --> 00:11:11.700 the face of the earth. Just come clean. Number 00:11:11.700 --> 00:11:15.200 two, experience God's unconditional love and 00:11:15.200 --> 00:11:17.330 acceptance. When you wake up in the morning, 00:11:17.389 --> 00:11:19.450 I have this picture and I try and remember in 00:11:19.450 --> 00:11:22.049 a lot of mornings, as soon as my eyes open, I 00:11:22.049 --> 00:11:24.230 have this picture of God looking down upon me 00:11:24.230 --> 00:11:27.789 and him saying to this, the Lord personal God, 00:11:27.990 --> 00:11:31.730 Elohim, is in your midst. The mighty one will 00:11:31.730 --> 00:11:33.570 save. And that word save means he'll deliver. 00:11:33.769 --> 00:11:35.669 It's not just save you from your sin. It means 00:11:35.669 --> 00:11:38.470 he's a deliverer. He'll help you. He'll take 00:11:38.470 --> 00:11:41.220 care of whatever you're facing. He will rejoice 00:11:41.220 --> 00:11:44.559 over you with gladness. He will quiet you with 00:11:44.559 --> 00:11:47.120 his love. He will rejoice over you with singing. 00:11:47.279 --> 00:11:50.240 Is that your view of God? Is that how he feels 00:11:50.240 --> 00:11:52.700 about you? Well, that doesn't come naturally 00:11:52.700 --> 00:11:55.840 to me. And so one of the things that I do, and 00:11:55.840 --> 00:12:00.659 I don't know how it works, but some of us believe 00:12:00.659 --> 00:12:04.039 that God loves us, but emotionally, we don't 00:12:04.039 --> 00:12:10.700 even feel like he likes us. That's why it's hard 00:12:10.700 --> 00:12:14.539 to pray. A lot, a lot of Christians are like 00:12:14.539 --> 00:12:17.299 duty. I know it's right. You know, like walking 00:12:17.299 --> 00:12:19.460 with God is like, you know, it's like castor 00:12:19.460 --> 00:12:20.919 oil. No, it's really good for you. It tastes 00:12:20.919 --> 00:12:23.720 terrible. You know, I know you're supposed to 00:12:23.720 --> 00:12:24.960 pray. I'm going to pray down. Here's the list, 00:12:25.000 --> 00:12:26.639 man. Here's the list. Read the Bible. This is 00:12:26.639 --> 00:12:29.440 really fun. You know, you get a little, get a 00:12:29.440 --> 00:12:31.519 little spiritual liver quiver just now and then. 00:12:31.559 --> 00:12:33.720 That was, that's pretty good. You know, God wants 00:12:33.720 --> 00:12:36.690 you to experience his love. A lot of that goes 00:12:36.690 --> 00:12:38.769 back to how you were raised and some teaching 00:12:38.769 --> 00:12:42.149 you got and family background. Now, this is loaded 00:12:42.149 --> 00:12:46.990 with music that causes my heart to remember how 00:12:46.990 --> 00:12:50.470 much God loves me. And almost every morning, 00:12:50.610 --> 00:12:53.149 part of my prayer time, there's two or three 00:12:53.149 --> 00:12:55.809 or four songs, and sometimes I just tell God, 00:12:55.909 --> 00:12:58.070 I just want to hang out. I don't want to get 00:12:58.070 --> 00:13:00.210 anything done. If you want me to read something, 00:13:00.289 --> 00:13:02.110 let me know. I've got a program I usually follow. 00:13:02.210 --> 00:13:05.309 I just want to hang. And I put this on, and I 00:13:05.309 --> 00:13:07.610 sing along with the songs, and I just worship 00:13:07.610 --> 00:13:12.289 God. And all I can tell you is, I get up, I feel 00:13:12.289 --> 00:13:15.269 loved. You know, when Teresa and I go out for 00:13:15.269 --> 00:13:16.970 coffee, it's not like, okay, what do you want 00:13:16.970 --> 00:13:18.929 to get accomplished here? Okay, you want to get 00:13:18.929 --> 00:13:22.029 intimate? Okay, I love you. Let me hear you say 00:13:22.029 --> 00:13:23.789 it. You love me too. Good. Okay, we got that 00:13:23.789 --> 00:13:28.289 off. Okay, plan for the day. Let's hold hands 00:13:28.289 --> 00:13:31.529 at 101. Great. Let's walk the dog and look up 00:13:31.529 --> 00:13:33.350 and say, isn't it beautiful? Okay, we'll get 00:13:33.350 --> 00:13:36.990 that one down. Okay. You think we can squeeze 00:13:36.990 --> 00:13:38.509 sex in here and make it real meaningful a little 00:13:38.509 --> 00:13:40.730 bit later? You know, that should be important, 00:13:40.809 --> 00:13:44.450 you know. Now, I mean, some of us approach our 00:13:44.450 --> 00:13:48.450 relationship, when I am with Teresa, I just want 00:13:48.450 --> 00:13:52.309 to hang. I just like being with her. I just like 00:13:52.309 --> 00:13:55.950 looking in her eyes. I like just... walking in 00:13:55.950 --> 00:13:58.690 the park. I like getting up at five in the morning 00:13:58.690 --> 00:14:00.389 when the moon's out and the stars are just coming 00:14:00.389 --> 00:14:02.730 out when it's cool and sitting out on the porch 00:14:02.730 --> 00:14:05.970 and hearing all the birds and sipping on a cup 00:14:05.970 --> 00:14:07.809 of coffee. And just sometimes we'll sit quietly 00:14:07.809 --> 00:14:11.970 for 15 minutes and sometimes we'll talk. I just, 00:14:12.090 --> 00:14:15.570 I like her. I love her. I want to be in her presence. 00:14:15.690 --> 00:14:18.789 God wants you to experience that. There's multiple 00:14:18.789 --> 00:14:21.610 ways you can do that. You can take walks in nature, 00:14:21.730 --> 00:14:24.309 but see, you got to slow down. So this is helpful 00:14:24.309 --> 00:14:28.100 for me. So that's a little tool that I use. A 00:14:28.100 --> 00:14:31.179 second tool for me is my view of God was so warped 00:14:31.179 --> 00:14:35.059 that I have... read portions of this book for 00:14:35.059 --> 00:14:36.960 about the last 32 years. It's called The Knowledge 00:14:36.960 --> 00:14:39.779 of the Holy by A .W. Tozer. And I will never 00:14:39.779 --> 00:14:42.220 forget hitting the chapter on the goodness of 00:14:42.220 --> 00:14:44.779 God and reading, the goodness of God is that 00:14:44.779 --> 00:14:47.779 which disposes him to be kind, cordial, benevolent, 00:14:47.779 --> 00:14:50.820 and full of goodwill toward men. He is tenderhearted 00:14:50.820 --> 00:14:53.580 and quick of sympathy. In his unfailing attitude 00:14:53.580 --> 00:14:57.279 toward all moral beings, is open, frank, and 00:14:57.279 --> 00:15:01.549 friendly by his nature. He is inclined to bestow 00:15:01.549 --> 00:15:04.850 blessedness. And I love this. He takes holy pleasure 00:15:04.850 --> 00:15:08.350 in the happiness of his people. Do you believe 00:15:08.350 --> 00:15:12.929 that? Or are you always trying to measure up 00:15:12.929 --> 00:15:15.110 to something? He takes holy, when you're happy, 00:15:15.210 --> 00:15:19.799 God gets happy. And then I love the line. He 00:15:19.799 --> 00:15:22.820 says, if the whole outlook of mankind might be 00:15:22.820 --> 00:15:25.600 changed, if we could all believe we dwell under 00:15:25.600 --> 00:15:28.159 a friendly sky and the God in heaven, though 00:15:28.159 --> 00:15:31.440 exalted in power and majesty, is eager to be 00:15:31.440 --> 00:15:34.779 friends with us. I will tell you, this is the 00:15:34.779 --> 00:15:37.980 P of perspective. When you have a big God and 00:15:37.980 --> 00:15:39.919 you have a big perspective, your problems get 00:15:39.919 --> 00:15:42.580 real small. And when your problems are small, 00:15:42.639 --> 00:15:45.320 you don't get so angry. It's not such a big deal. 00:15:46.139 --> 00:15:49.740 God is good. God is powerful. I'm the object 00:15:49.740 --> 00:15:52.159 of his love. You know, he's got the whole universe 00:15:52.159 --> 00:15:54.179 under control and I bet he can handle that business 00:15:54.179 --> 00:15:56.580 deal. He's got the whole universe under control 00:15:56.580 --> 00:15:58.259 and you know, I bet he can handle what's happening 00:15:58.259 --> 00:16:00.700 with the economy. He's got the whole universe 00:16:00.700 --> 00:16:03.639 under control and you are the object of his affection. 00:16:04.019 --> 00:16:08.570 So experience God. You're listening to Living 00:16:08.570 --> 00:16:11.149 on the Edge, and Chip will be back to continue 00:16:11.149 --> 00:16:13.830 our series, Overcoming Emotions That Destroy, 00:16:14.129 --> 00:16:17.149 in just a minute. But let me quickly tell you, 00:16:17.169 --> 00:16:19.850 we are more than a broadcast ministry. We're 00:16:19.850 --> 00:16:22.129 passionate about supporting pastors globally, 00:16:22.490 --> 00:16:25.250 developing helpful resources, and sharing the 00:16:25.250 --> 00:16:27.970 gospel with this next generation. So if you'd 00:16:27.970 --> 00:16:30.309 like to partner with us in these areas, go to 00:16:30.309 --> 00:16:34.509 livingontheedge .org. We'll hear again as Chip. 00:16:35.319 --> 00:16:38.480 Three, accept who God made you to be. Psalm 139, 00:16:38.580 --> 00:16:41.240 classic passage. He formed your inward parts. 00:16:41.460 --> 00:16:44.159 You're fearfully and wonderfully made. His eyes 00:16:44.159 --> 00:16:46.700 saw your unformed substance. How do you learn 00:16:46.700 --> 00:16:48.879 to accept who you are? There's lots of tools. 00:16:49.179 --> 00:16:52.159 This is the one I'm using right now. I probably 00:16:52.159 --> 00:16:55.419 have about 30 of these, maybe 40. I started in 00:16:55.419 --> 00:16:58.509 my... last couple years of college. I don't think 00:16:58.509 --> 00:17:00.769 it's for everyone. If you don't do this, don't 00:17:00.769 --> 00:17:03.549 feel guilty. In fact, anything that I share that 00:17:03.549 --> 00:17:05.910 happens to help me that you think that doesn't 00:17:05.910 --> 00:17:09.930 work for me, then I would not do it. I have a 00:17:09.930 --> 00:17:11.769 sneaking suspicion. You're not me and I'm not 00:17:11.769 --> 00:17:15.549 you. I've heard lots of wonderful things other 00:17:15.549 --> 00:17:17.930 people do and I think that sounds idiotic. That 00:17:17.930 --> 00:17:20.390 doesn't work for me. But I used to try it. I'm 00:17:20.390 --> 00:17:22.630 learning to accept me because I'm tracking the 00:17:22.630 --> 00:17:26.640 journey that I have with God. And it's not formal. 00:17:26.940 --> 00:17:28.940 And sometimes I make a list. Sometimes I write 00:17:28.940 --> 00:17:30.960 out my prayers. Some of them start out, God, 00:17:31.019 --> 00:17:33.059 I'm really tired. I'm really bummed out. I don't 00:17:33.059 --> 00:17:34.960 feel like praying at all. But I thought I would 00:17:34.960 --> 00:17:37.539 check in. And here's what's going on in my heart. 00:17:38.220 --> 00:17:41.279 And what I realize is the more I process life 00:17:41.279 --> 00:17:43.740 with him, and then I realize, you know something? 00:17:44.799 --> 00:17:48.559 I was struggling with this two years ago. And 00:17:48.559 --> 00:17:52.420 wow, you know something? I really am changing. 00:17:53.000 --> 00:17:56.240 The grace of God is willing and working in and 00:17:56.240 --> 00:17:59.460 through me for his good pleasure. And, you know, 00:17:59.500 --> 00:18:01.779 when you can't see it and you can't track it, 00:18:01.859 --> 00:18:04.440 I mean, you know, S &P 500, don't they track 00:18:04.440 --> 00:18:08.079 stuff? Dow, don't they track stuff? NASDAQ, don't 00:18:08.079 --> 00:18:10.200 they track stuff? Businesses, don't they have 00:18:10.200 --> 00:18:12.400 a quarterly report? Most of us have no idea. 00:18:12.460 --> 00:18:15.039 Where am I spiritually? Where have I been? Where 00:18:15.039 --> 00:18:16.980 am I going? And I wonder where I'm at right now. 00:18:17.580 --> 00:18:19.859 And sometimes, like this is hard to believe I 00:18:19.859 --> 00:18:22.220 know, I get really tired and really discouraged. 00:18:22.539 --> 00:18:24.220 And I just think, you know what? I don't think 00:18:24.220 --> 00:18:25.799 my life's going anywhere. I don't think God's 00:18:25.799 --> 00:18:27.559 using me at all. I don't think, you know, the 00:18:27.559 --> 00:18:30.299 sort of condemnation journey. And I'll go pull 00:18:30.299 --> 00:18:33.180 out one of these from like five or 10 years ago. 00:18:36.440 --> 00:18:38.519 I think, man, this is a sorry dude that wrote 00:18:38.519 --> 00:18:43.099 this. You know? And that's as sincere as he could 00:18:43.099 --> 00:18:46.410 be. And I think, wow. And then I'll read, I was 00:18:46.410 --> 00:18:48.730 praying this outlandish prayer. God did that. 00:18:50.109 --> 00:18:53.170 Wow. If he did that for me, he sure must love 00:18:53.170 --> 00:18:55.470 me because I know who I am. And you know, it's 00:18:55.470 --> 00:18:59.470 just a journey. And by the way, most of these 00:18:59.470 --> 00:19:01.769 passages, I told you before it's been helpful. 00:19:01.890 --> 00:19:04.450 You can write them on a card. Don't put too much 00:19:04.450 --> 00:19:07.269 pressure on yourself. Read them over. Read them 00:19:07.269 --> 00:19:10.549 over. Pray them out loud to God. Your mind gets 00:19:10.549 --> 00:19:14.140 renewed. We want to maximize God. Trust God in 00:19:14.140 --> 00:19:16.299 his sovereignty. Let him be in control. I mean, 00:19:16.319 --> 00:19:18.819 this Isaiah passage, to whom then will you liken 00:19:18.819 --> 00:19:21.920 me or who's my equal? Lift up your eyes. See 00:19:21.920 --> 00:19:24.339 who's created these things. He brings out their 00:19:24.339 --> 00:19:26.819 hosts, the stars by number. He calls all these, 00:19:26.880 --> 00:19:30.720 you know, 200 billion stars and behind 200 billion 00:19:30.720 --> 00:19:34.519 galaxies all by name. Who can know the strength 00:19:34.519 --> 00:19:37.000 of his power? Not one of them is missing. Why 00:19:37.000 --> 00:19:39.380 do you say, O Jacob, and speak, O Israel? My 00:19:39.380 --> 00:19:43.319 way is hidden from the Lord. Have you not known, 00:19:43.460 --> 00:19:45.880 have you not heard the everlasting God, the Lord, 00:19:46.059 --> 00:19:47.920 the creator of the ends of the earth, neither 00:19:47.920 --> 00:19:51.380 faints nor is weary? His understanding is unsearchable. 00:19:52.519 --> 00:19:55.359 I don't mean, I will never throw my brains in 00:19:55.359 --> 00:19:58.359 the trash and just say, oh, whatever. But I will 00:19:58.359 --> 00:20:01.700 do the most rigorous research I can, and I will 00:20:01.700 --> 00:20:04.990 study the scriptures, and I will... review everything 00:20:04.990 --> 00:20:07.890 I can get my hands on to understand all the what's 00:20:07.890 --> 00:20:10.609 and the why's of this life. And then when I get 00:20:10.609 --> 00:20:13.410 done, I just realize I don't know anything. And 00:20:13.410 --> 00:20:16.329 I have to entrust the mystery of this life and 00:20:16.329 --> 00:20:19.069 what God's doing in the world, in people I love, 00:20:19.170 --> 00:20:21.869 in me. And at the end of the day, I have to back 00:20:21.869 --> 00:20:24.710 it all the way up to this big, big P for perspective 00:20:24.710 --> 00:20:30.549 and say, he's good, he's holy, he's loving, he's 00:20:30.549 --> 00:20:34.190 wise. He knows all things. I'm the object of 00:20:34.190 --> 00:20:37.349 his affection. He has a good plan. I won't always 00:20:37.349 --> 00:20:40.809 understand it. And he is in absolute control 00:20:40.809 --> 00:20:45.210 and he's trustworthy. That will give you a different 00:20:45.210 --> 00:20:47.549 lens to look through. You either tend to look 00:20:47.549 --> 00:20:49.930 at life through the problem, the 5 % of your 00:20:49.930 --> 00:20:52.210 marriage or 10 % you don't like, the part of 00:20:52.210 --> 00:20:54.369 work, the three or four things that are bugging 00:20:54.369 --> 00:20:57.329 you, and you tend not to look at the 97 of all 00:20:57.329 --> 00:20:59.589 the grace of God and all the things that he's 00:20:59.589 --> 00:21:02.400 done. When you look at the problem pretty soon, 00:21:02.559 --> 00:21:04.619 you look at people and everything through the 00:21:04.619 --> 00:21:07.140 problem, and you become an angry, resentful, 00:21:07.160 --> 00:21:11.799 not very fun, sort of drinking the lemon juice 00:21:11.799 --> 00:21:16.119 type Christian. Or you take that and you pull 00:21:16.119 --> 00:21:19.380 it back, and you get a high, awesome view of 00:21:19.380 --> 00:21:21.859 God. And you don't say there's not a problem, 00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:24.359 but you see the problem in view of who God is. 00:21:25.380 --> 00:21:30.009 You maximize Him. You minimize stress. We covered 00:21:30.009 --> 00:21:33.809 this one. Be merciful. All I can tell you is 00:21:33.809 --> 00:21:36.190 as you read Luke 6, love your enemies, do good 00:21:36.190 --> 00:21:40.529 to them. God's that way. Just let people off 00:21:40.529 --> 00:21:43.970 the hook. Just give them an ollie ollie and free. 00:21:44.069 --> 00:21:46.930 Remember when you played hide and seek? You just 00:21:46.930 --> 00:21:48.829 need to do a spiritual ollie ollie and free. 00:21:49.710 --> 00:21:54.549 I've hated your guts for 11 years. I've been 00:21:54.549 --> 00:21:58.759 envious of you for 10. You've been talking about 00:21:58.759 --> 00:22:02.019 me bad. Everyone knows you have. Olly olly and 00:22:02.019 --> 00:22:03.940 free, just taking you off the hook, wrote your 00:22:03.940 --> 00:22:05.660 name on a piece of paper, offered you to God, 00:22:05.720 --> 00:22:07.440 burned a piece of paper. I'm just done with that. 00:22:08.380 --> 00:22:11.500 Just let some people off the hook. And the person 00:22:11.500 --> 00:22:15.640 that will get free is you. Finally, number six, 00:22:15.779 --> 00:22:19.700 pray about everything. And we all, you know. 00:22:20.480 --> 00:22:22.960 Know this very familiar passage about not being 00:22:22.960 --> 00:22:25.920 anxious, but in everything by prayer and supplication 00:22:25.920 --> 00:22:28.539 of making a request known to God and that great 00:22:28.539 --> 00:22:32.539 promise of his peace. And prayer is hard for 00:22:32.539 --> 00:22:35.240 me. I think it is for most Christians. This little 00:22:35.240 --> 00:22:38.099 tool, it's called the Handbook of Prayer by Ken 00:22:38.099 --> 00:22:40.960 Boah. And what it does is it takes just scripture 00:22:40.960 --> 00:22:43.420 and it personalizes it. And it'll start with 00:22:43.420 --> 00:22:47.610 praise, renewal, petition, intercession. affirmation, 00:22:47.610 --> 00:22:49.809 thanksgiving, and just, I mean, you can just 00:22:49.809 --> 00:22:52.630 see there, it's short, but you can read out loud 00:22:52.630 --> 00:22:54.990 a little portion of God's word that's personalized, 00:22:55.029 --> 00:22:57.529 and it leads you, and then you can pray some 00:22:57.529 --> 00:22:59.769 thanksgiving, and there's some time of confession 00:22:59.769 --> 00:23:03.089 and some renewal. And I don't do, like, I don't 00:23:03.089 --> 00:23:05.349 do anything every day. I mean, I read my Bible, 00:23:05.410 --> 00:23:07.549 and I pray, but sometimes I read a lot, and sometimes 00:23:07.549 --> 00:23:10.250 I pray a lot, and sometimes, you know, but... 00:23:10.890 --> 00:23:12.710 You know, like I don't get up with Teresa every 00:23:12.710 --> 00:23:15.250 day and go, okay, now we need to talk for 37 00:23:15.250 --> 00:23:18.410 minutes. We need to walk for 14 .4 minutes. We 00:23:18.410 --> 00:23:20.450 need to have two and a half meals together. In 00:23:20.450 --> 00:23:25.390 other words, what's the relationship need? Let's 00:23:25.390 --> 00:23:27.509 get out of the three chapters keeps the devil 00:23:27.509 --> 00:23:31.710 away. Let's talk about a heart that hungers and 00:23:31.710 --> 00:23:34.910 thirsts for the living God, that pants to be 00:23:34.910 --> 00:23:39.529 in his presence, that longs to enjoy him. and 00:23:39.529 --> 00:23:43.609 discipline ourselves and blocks off time, not 00:23:43.609 --> 00:23:47.869 to fulfill a duty to check off a list, but to 00:23:47.869 --> 00:23:52.109 meet a God who is eager to be our friend. You 00:23:52.109 --> 00:23:56.569 get a high view of God, you will get small problems 00:23:56.569 --> 00:23:59.609 or you'll get a different perspective on them. 00:24:00.309 --> 00:24:03.509 And now we go back to where we were. Your anger 00:24:03.509 --> 00:24:06.789 quotient equals environment, minimizing the stress, 00:24:07.009 --> 00:24:11.740 E. plus P, perspective, maximizing God, times 00:24:11.740 --> 00:24:20.059 O, obeying Ephesians 4 .26. Be angry, but don't 00:24:20.059 --> 00:24:23.059 sin. Don't let the sun go down on your anger. 00:24:26.279 --> 00:24:29.200 You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chip 00:24:29.200 --> 00:24:31.880 Ingram, and the message you just heard, learning 00:24:31.880 --> 00:24:34.460 how to stop stress before it starts, is from 00:24:34.460 --> 00:24:37.000 our series, Overcoming Emotions That Destroy. 00:24:37.930 --> 00:24:40.130 Chip will join us in studio to share some insights 00:24:40.130 --> 00:24:43.450 from today's talk in just a minute. Anger has 00:24:43.450 --> 00:24:46.470 always been seen as a wrong, unhealthy feeling. 00:24:46.890 --> 00:24:49.529 But what if I told you that this emotion is a 00:24:49.529 --> 00:24:52.049 signal of a deeper problem we need to be aware 00:24:52.049 --> 00:24:55.109 of? And if channeled correctly, anger could actually 00:24:55.109 --> 00:24:58.170 be used for good. Well, in this 10 -part series, 00:24:58.529 --> 00:25:00.869 Chip uncovers the root of anger in our lives 00:25:00.869 --> 00:25:03.289 and explains how we can turn our most intense 00:25:03.289 --> 00:25:07.160 frustrations into a valuable asset. So if you're 00:25:07.160 --> 00:25:09.599 desperate to better understand this emotion and 00:25:09.599 --> 00:25:11.559 have control over it, you're not going to want 00:25:11.559 --> 00:25:14.819 to miss a single program. Well, Chip's here in 00:25:14.819 --> 00:25:17.259 studio with me now. And Chip, before we go on, 00:25:17.339 --> 00:25:19.059 you wanted to share something with our listeners? 00:25:19.539 --> 00:25:22.279 Thanks so much, Dave. I know a lot of people 00:25:22.279 --> 00:25:24.460 pray and support the ministry because you hear 00:25:24.460 --> 00:25:26.559 of exciting new things that we're doing, whether 00:25:26.559 --> 00:25:28.819 it's in China or the Middle East or working with 00:25:28.819 --> 00:25:31.339 pastors. But I'd like you to consider something 00:25:31.339 --> 00:25:34.599 else. The Bible is very clear that where you 00:25:34.599 --> 00:25:38.119 are spiritually ministered to, there's a moral 00:25:38.119 --> 00:25:40.819 responsibility to financially support. That's 00:25:40.819 --> 00:25:43.819 not me. That's the Apostle Paul. And, you know, 00:25:43.880 --> 00:25:46.680 there's about a million people every week that 00:25:46.680 --> 00:25:49.640 are hearing God's Word. And God is using the 00:25:49.640 --> 00:25:51.859 teaching ministry of Living on the Edge to help 00:25:51.859 --> 00:25:54.779 Christians grow in Christlikeness. And that changes 00:25:54.779 --> 00:25:57.619 families and communities. If you're one of those 00:25:57.619 --> 00:26:01.279 people, would you pray about giving back if indeed 00:26:01.279 --> 00:26:03.779 living on the edge is ministering to you and 00:26:03.779 --> 00:26:06.200 helping you grow spiritually? It's just a principle 00:26:06.200 --> 00:26:08.299 that I think is very important. Would you pray 00:26:08.299 --> 00:26:10.160 about it and do whatever God shows you to do? 00:26:10.480 --> 00:26:13.140 Thanks, Chip. As you prayerfully consider your 00:26:13.140 --> 00:26:15.650 role in this ministry. I want to remind you that 00:26:15.650 --> 00:26:18.390 every dollar is significant. When you partner 00:26:18.390 --> 00:26:20.970 with Living on the Edge, you multiply our efforts 00:26:20.970 --> 00:26:24.529 and resources in remarkable ways. To give a gift, 00:26:24.569 --> 00:26:28.250 go to livingontheedge .org or call us at 888 00:26:28.250 --> 00:26:36.329 -333 -6003. Again, that's 888 -333 -6003 or go 00:26:36.329 --> 00:26:41.430 to livingontheedge .org. App listeners, tap Donate. 00:26:41.670 --> 00:26:45.410 Well, with that, here again is Chip. As we close 00:26:45.410 --> 00:26:49.009 today's program, maximizing God will greatly 00:26:49.009 --> 00:26:51.589 reduce stress in your life. I went through a 00:26:51.589 --> 00:26:53.849 number of very specific things very quickly. 00:26:54.089 --> 00:26:57.089 If you need to see those and get some help, go 00:26:57.089 --> 00:26:59.869 to the website, livingontheedge .org, and you 00:26:59.869 --> 00:27:02.809 can download the notes for free. Now, under each 00:27:02.809 --> 00:27:04.890 one of those things in the book, we actually 00:27:04.890 --> 00:27:08.609 develop very specific ways and tell stories and 00:27:08.609 --> 00:27:10.650 show you how to do it. So if this is helpful, 00:27:10.829 --> 00:27:13.230 that might be a tool. But just for our purposes 00:27:13.230 --> 00:27:16.829 today, let me just remind you of the halt. H 00:27:16.829 --> 00:27:22.470 -A -L -T. When you are feeling hungry, angry, 00:27:22.869 --> 00:27:26.890 lonely, or tired, know that you just got to stop. 00:27:26.970 --> 00:27:30.210 Don't make a big decision. If you even feel mildly 00:27:30.210 --> 00:27:33.890 tempted, just realize, halt, stop. That's when 00:27:33.890 --> 00:27:38.140 really good. really godly people do very stupid, 00:27:38.279 --> 00:27:40.859 sinful things. That one's worth the whole day 00:27:40.859 --> 00:27:42.680 today. I remember when someone shared that with 00:27:42.680 --> 00:27:45.119 me, it was like, wow, I've been in airports, 00:27:45.359 --> 00:27:48.619 hungry, tired, someone jumps in line, I feel 00:27:48.619 --> 00:27:50.740 the anger, and I just realized, ooh, wait a minute, 00:27:50.779 --> 00:27:54.900 Ingram, halt, just halt. Father, I pray for those 00:27:54.900 --> 00:27:57.779 under overwhelming stress that you'll help them 00:27:57.779 --> 00:28:02.720 today to halt, to stop. to pray, to take five 00:28:02.720 --> 00:28:05.279 minutes they don't think they have and to open 00:28:05.279 --> 00:28:08.099 the Psalms and read them out loud and tell you 00:28:08.099 --> 00:28:10.960 how they honestly feel. And I pray that you would 00:28:10.960 --> 00:28:13.740 calm their heart and give them perspective. In 00:28:13.740 --> 00:28:18.180 Jesus' name, amen. Amen. Thanks, Chip. Hey, before 00:28:18.180 --> 00:28:20.160 we go, if you'd like to get plugged in with any 00:28:20.160 --> 00:28:23.740 of the resources for this series, visit livingontheedge 00:28:23.740 --> 00:28:27.500 .org. There you can download Chip's message notes, 00:28:27.700 --> 00:28:30.059 check out our small group study, or listen to 00:28:30.059 --> 00:28:32.519 any part of this series. We want to help you 00:28:32.519 --> 00:28:36.000 grow in your walk with Jesus, so visit livingontheedge 00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:40.180 .org today. Well, from all of us here, I'm Dave 00:28:40.180 --> 00:28:42.240 Drewy, thanking you for listening to this edition 00:28:42.240 --> 00:28:44.920 of Living on the Edge, and I hope you'll join 00:28:44.920 --> 00:28:45.940 us again next time.