WEBVTT 00:00:01.580 --> 00:00:04.280 Do you remember that old Beatles song, All You 00:00:04.280 --> 00:00:07.459 Need Is Love? Remember? All you need is love. 00:00:07.960 --> 00:00:11.839 Guess what? A lot of people criticized the Beatles, 00:00:12.019 --> 00:00:15.019 but they got it right on that one. And we're 00:00:15.019 --> 00:00:17.300 going to talk about how to get out of the performance 00:00:17.300 --> 00:00:20.719 trap and get down to what really matters. Learning 00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:23.440 that all you really need is love. That's today. 00:00:26.120 --> 00:00:28.460 Thank you for being with us for this edition 00:00:28.460 --> 00:00:31.500 of Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. Chip 00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:33.840 serves as our Bible teacher for this global teaching 00:00:33.840 --> 00:00:36.359 and discipleship ministry, helping Christians 00:00:36.359 --> 00:00:39.359 develop an authentic faith. Well, in just a minute, 00:00:39.399 --> 00:00:41.880 we'll continue our series, Spiritual Simplicity, 00:00:42.079 --> 00:00:44.899 Doing Less, Loving More. But before Chip gets 00:00:44.899 --> 00:00:46.899 started, if this is your first time listening 00:00:46.899 --> 00:00:49.259 to Living on the Edge, or you're curious about 00:00:49.259 --> 00:00:52.659 what we are and what we do, visit livingontheedge 00:00:52.659 --> 00:00:56.390 .org. you'll discover a wealth of valuable tools 00:00:56.390 --> 00:00:58.549 we've created to equip you in your walk with 00:00:58.549 --> 00:01:02.990 Jesus. So check out livingontheedge .org today. 00:01:03.609 --> 00:01:05.650 Well, with that, here again is Chip with part 00:01:05.650 --> 00:01:08.489 two of his talk, All You Need Is Love, from 1 00:01:08.489 --> 00:01:13.129 Corinthians chapter 13. Many of us live very 00:01:13.129 --> 00:01:18.769 hurried, overextended, complex lives with shallow, 00:01:18.829 --> 00:01:21.650 superficial relationships, even with our closest 00:01:21.650 --> 00:01:26.010 friends and families. Because we have unconsciously 00:01:26.010 --> 00:01:31.250 learned to believe performing well, possessing 00:01:31.250 --> 00:01:37.129 much, and providing stuff is what life is all 00:01:37.129 --> 00:01:41.769 about. Your value as a person, your significance, 00:01:41.810 --> 00:01:45.450 you got to perform well. Who you are, what you 00:01:45.450 --> 00:01:51.049 do, what people think has to do with possessing. 00:01:51.260 --> 00:01:54.540 Some of it's intangible and some of it is very 00:01:54.540 --> 00:01:59.939 tangible. How you doing with this? Boy, it's 00:01:59.939 --> 00:02:03.319 quiet in here, isn't it? And this isn't, you 00:02:03.319 --> 00:02:05.840 know what? This is, you don't get a free pass 00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:09.199 on this because you're a pastor. As I've looked 00:02:09.199 --> 00:02:12.800 at my DNA and my schedule, and when I look at 00:02:12.800 --> 00:02:16.000 the list of not what I say, but the list of what 00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.939 does my behavior say? What does my schedule scream? 00:02:19.120 --> 00:02:22.860 Where does my money go? I feel like there's a 00:02:22.860 --> 00:02:25.740 constant battle of fighting against this belief 00:02:25.740 --> 00:02:32.560 system that possessing, performing, and even 00:02:32.560 --> 00:02:36.599 that altruistic I'm going to provide for can 00:02:36.599 --> 00:02:40.319 get me going at a pace that isn't good for my 00:02:40.319 --> 00:02:45.139 soul. It isn't good for my marriage. It isn't 00:02:45.139 --> 00:02:48.259 good for my parenting or grandparenting. And 00:02:48.259 --> 00:02:52.169 it kills friendships. So if that's the diagnosis, 00:02:52.210 --> 00:02:54.610 what would the doctor say? What would the simplify 00:02:54.610 --> 00:02:57.009 your life doctor say? Here's a prescription for 00:02:57.009 --> 00:03:00.590 transformation. Three things he would say. He 00:03:00.590 --> 00:03:04.250 gets his little pad out. You know, put your shirt 00:03:04.250 --> 00:03:06.490 back on. I'll be right back in just a second. 00:03:07.030 --> 00:03:09.389 Little prescription pads coming out. Number one, 00:03:09.430 --> 00:03:14.069 the secret to simplifying your life is focus. 00:03:15.349 --> 00:03:17.710 Now this isn't earth shattering, is it? You're 00:03:17.710 --> 00:03:20.879 trying to do too much. Oh, you're trying to accomplish 00:03:20.879 --> 00:03:23.240 too much. Oh, you're trying to get your kids 00:03:23.240 --> 00:03:26.400 involved in too much. Oh, you need to do less, 00:03:26.419 --> 00:03:30.840 but do it better, deeper, more relational, but 00:03:30.840 --> 00:03:33.439 you need to do the things that matter most. Oh, 00:03:33.479 --> 00:03:37.479 okay. Knowing that we've all done that and tried 00:03:37.479 --> 00:03:39.900 that, and it lasts for two days to two weeks, 00:03:39.939 --> 00:03:43.500 depending on our personalities. Rx number two, 00:03:43.699 --> 00:03:48.610 you can only do less when you purpose. To love 00:03:48.610 --> 00:03:54.409 more. This for me is the biggest aha of the series 00:03:54.409 --> 00:03:57.650 in this message. I have tried many, many times 00:03:57.650 --> 00:04:00.729 to tweak my schedule, right? I'll do a little 00:04:00.729 --> 00:04:03.229 less of this, a little less of that. And I already, 00:04:03.349 --> 00:04:06.310 I go to bed early. I get up real early. I mean, 00:04:06.310 --> 00:04:08.069 I've read time management books like you all 00:04:08.069 --> 00:04:10.710 have. I do my A's first before I do my B's and 00:04:10.710 --> 00:04:15.409 I do my C's. I do know how to multitask. And 00:04:15.409 --> 00:04:19.050 I'm one very intense person. And yet I watch 00:04:19.050 --> 00:04:22.089 it just multiply, multiply, multiply until different 00:04:22.089 --> 00:04:24.189 seasons of my life, I feel like I've got the 00:04:24.189 --> 00:04:26.949 seven plates spinning or juggling the balls. 00:04:27.750 --> 00:04:30.370 And then somehow, well, that can lay there for 00:04:30.370 --> 00:04:31.449 a couple minutes and it'll give my attention 00:04:31.449 --> 00:04:33.290 over here. Ooh, that's my marriage. It can't 00:04:33.290 --> 00:04:34.610 lay there very long. And what, you've done it, 00:04:34.629 --> 00:04:39.410 right? If just tweaking things was about intelligence, 00:04:39.930 --> 00:04:42.569 I'm talking to a really smart group of people 00:04:42.569 --> 00:04:46.269 who you would have figured that out by now. This 00:04:46.269 --> 00:04:49.310 is a lifestyle issue. This is a mindset issue. 00:04:49.410 --> 00:04:52.569 And this pressure and this demand has us going 00:04:52.569 --> 00:04:55.750 all these different directions and then sedating 00:04:55.750 --> 00:05:00.550 our pain and our loneliness with videos and technology 00:05:00.550 --> 00:05:07.350 and food and unhealth. And that's why we have 00:05:07.350 --> 00:05:10.529 so many addiction issues. Because right before 00:05:10.529 --> 00:05:12.709 people get ready to crack, they just find a substitute 00:05:12.709 --> 00:05:18.519 to make them feel better. I was in, South Africa 00:05:18.519 --> 00:05:21.360 and afterwards went to Zimbabwe and I have to 00:05:21.360 --> 00:05:24.259 visit orphans. And it was, yes, we want to help 00:05:24.259 --> 00:05:26.560 the orphans. And my wife and I have been financially 00:05:26.560 --> 00:05:29.500 supporting a ministry we really believe in, but 00:05:29.500 --> 00:05:31.779 it, great. It wasn't, am I going to check it 00:05:31.779 --> 00:05:33.139 out? I knew it was going to be good before I 00:05:33.139 --> 00:05:37.779 got there. What I knew was at the pace that I 00:05:37.779 --> 00:05:40.000 live with the new things that I've taken on, 00:05:40.120 --> 00:05:43.699 unless I look into the eyes of little orphan 00:05:43.699 --> 00:05:48.139 kids who live in shacks, And unless I feel their 00:05:48.139 --> 00:05:51.600 pain and see what the third world is like, I 00:05:51.600 --> 00:05:54.100 will just go faster and faster and try and do 00:05:54.100 --> 00:05:56.379 things bigger and better and faster and more, 00:05:56.480 --> 00:05:59.079 bigger and better and faster and more. And just 00:05:59.079 --> 00:06:01.100 because they're spiritual, they can make your 00:06:01.100 --> 00:06:04.889 life just as crazy. And so I remember in Zimbabwe, 00:06:04.930 --> 00:06:06.730 it was the second home. I'd been doing some teaching 00:06:06.730 --> 00:06:08.610 and our group visited a couple different homes 00:06:08.610 --> 00:06:11.689 and they have a gated place and you go into the 00:06:11.689 --> 00:06:13.490 home and they have like eight or 10 girls and 00:06:13.490 --> 00:06:15.670 an auntie and a grandmother and they teach them 00:06:15.670 --> 00:06:18.029 the Bible and they get a good meal. And we went 00:06:18.029 --> 00:06:19.790 in the back and they're teaching the garden to 00:06:19.790 --> 00:06:22.149 feed them and then had a chicken run where they're 00:06:22.149 --> 00:06:24.529 raising chickens for their food. But I got out 00:06:24.529 --> 00:06:26.649 of the car and this little girl, in fact, she 00:06:26.649 --> 00:06:29.449 was about this tall, so she's a little heavier 00:06:29.449 --> 00:06:31.750 than I'd hoped. She just walked up to me like 00:06:31.750 --> 00:06:36.399 this and went, So I got her, and I put her on 00:06:36.399 --> 00:06:38.920 my hip, and we walked around for a while, and 00:06:38.920 --> 00:06:40.420 she seemed to really enjoy that, and it was kind 00:06:40.420 --> 00:06:43.800 of like, we're going to go to the back. Do you 00:06:43.800 --> 00:06:45.379 want to walk? And I'm thinking, my back says 00:06:45.379 --> 00:06:48.420 it would be nice if you walked. And she just 00:06:48.420 --> 00:06:50.899 put her arms around me. No. I said, well, what's 00:06:50.899 --> 00:06:53.899 your name? She goes, Blessing. I thought, that's 00:06:53.899 --> 00:06:56.139 interesting. And so we went around back, and 00:06:56.139 --> 00:06:58.600 she was on my hip for about 25 or 30 minutes. 00:06:58.800 --> 00:07:02.290 Actually, I had to change hips. And then we had 00:07:02.290 --> 00:07:03.910 a little girl that was 13 years old that was 00:07:03.910 --> 00:07:05.670 taken off the streets when she was about five. 00:07:06.569 --> 00:07:08.430 And you don't know what it's like for a little 00:07:08.430 --> 00:07:10.430 girl in Zimbabwe or around the world in these 00:07:10.430 --> 00:07:12.970 countries that are on the streets with no parent 00:07:12.970 --> 00:07:17.509 at five, six, four, seven. Just let your imagination 00:07:17.509 --> 00:07:20.410 go, and it's a little bit worse than that. And 00:07:20.410 --> 00:07:22.649 this little girl, after now four and a half years, 00:07:22.730 --> 00:07:26.290 five years in this home, was amazingly articulate. 00:07:27.310 --> 00:07:30.069 And not only amazingly articulate, but she began 00:07:30.069 --> 00:07:33.490 to talk about, not just parroting verses that 00:07:33.490 --> 00:07:36.209 she'd memorized. I have a relationship with Jesus 00:07:36.209 --> 00:07:40.430 now. I get to eat every day. But the most important 00:07:40.430 --> 00:07:42.790 thing is, and she looked up because a pastor 00:07:42.790 --> 00:07:45.410 comes like every other day there along with the 00:07:45.410 --> 00:07:47.889 auntie and the grandmother. She says, I have 00:07:47.889 --> 00:07:51.750 a family and I'm loved. And she just beamed. 00:07:52.790 --> 00:07:55.050 And I just thought, you know, I just sat and 00:07:55.050 --> 00:08:00.269 I thought with blessed on my hip, these kids, 00:08:01.780 --> 00:08:04.699 possess what so many of us are chasing after. 00:08:05.720 --> 00:08:08.060 You know what? They're not taking drugs to fall 00:08:08.060 --> 00:08:11.439 asleep at night. They're not wondering how to 00:08:11.439 --> 00:08:16.439 balance 75 to -dos. The simplicity of their life. 00:08:17.560 --> 00:08:22.860 I love God. I love these people. They love me. 00:08:23.699 --> 00:08:26.459 We want to help others in the way that we've 00:08:26.459 --> 00:08:31.790 been helped. And I just thought, That is a blessing. 00:08:33.409 --> 00:08:36.350 And what I realized for me was the only way, 00:08:36.429 --> 00:08:39.250 this was a big ha -ha. I've tried to do less, 00:08:39.330 --> 00:08:42.080 but other stuff creeps in, right? There's always 00:08:42.080 --> 00:08:44.559 that great opportunity. And it always comes with, 00:08:44.600 --> 00:08:46.059 here's a great opportunity. It's right down the 00:08:46.059 --> 00:08:48.179 middle of the plate. And by the way, this great 00:08:48.179 --> 00:08:49.759 opportunity is only gonna come now. And if you 00:08:49.759 --> 00:08:51.500 don't swing at it right now, your kids are gonna 00:08:51.500 --> 00:08:52.879 miss it or you're gonna miss it or the business 00:08:52.879 --> 00:08:54.820 is gonna miss it. And it's strategic and it's 00:08:54.820 --> 00:08:57.080 great. And you can do this and you can add it 00:08:57.080 --> 00:08:58.419 to your schedule. You're not gonna take anything 00:08:58.419 --> 00:09:00.000 off, but you're gonna mentally say, act like 00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:01.960 you are. And so one more thing gets on there, 00:09:02.039 --> 00:09:07.759 right? And I just realized my no isn't strong 00:09:07.759 --> 00:09:11.240 enough to keep stuff off my plate. until I have 00:09:11.240 --> 00:09:15.279 a lot stronger yes. How did I have two weeks 00:09:15.279 --> 00:09:19.740 to go be with orphans? And when I was with them 00:09:19.740 --> 00:09:23.159 and I was with these pastors and when I saw the 00:09:23.159 --> 00:09:27.539 third world afresh, all of a sudden, some of 00:09:27.539 --> 00:09:30.179 the stuff that felt so demanding and some of 00:09:30.179 --> 00:09:32.000 the people and things I needed to say no to, 00:09:32.120 --> 00:09:36.679 it's easy to say no to doing less when you're 00:09:36.679 --> 00:09:43.110 saying yes to loving more. The third RX is begin 00:09:43.110 --> 00:09:47.429 to redefine success. Begin to redefine success 00:09:47.429 --> 00:09:50.330 from how did I do? That's a performance question. 00:09:50.710 --> 00:09:53.149 Mom, how did I do? Dad, how did I do? Teacher, 00:09:53.190 --> 00:09:56.590 how did I do? Coach, how did I do? Corporate 00:09:56.590 --> 00:10:00.429 earnings, how did I do? Change that to who am 00:10:00.429 --> 00:10:04.110 I becoming? You might write above the question, 00:10:04.289 --> 00:10:06.169 how did I do performance? Then put an arrow. 00:10:06.370 --> 00:10:08.230 Who am I becoming? That's a character question. 00:10:09.769 --> 00:10:13.830 What do I have? That's possessions. Put an arrow 00:10:13.830 --> 00:10:17.669 from that and move it to how am I using it? Not 00:10:17.669 --> 00:10:19.750 what do I have? How am I using it? That's a, 00:10:19.850 --> 00:10:23.029 you move from possessions to stewardship. And 00:10:23.029 --> 00:10:25.669 the third question is how much do I give? What 00:10:25.669 --> 00:10:27.909 if you change that question to why do I give? 00:10:28.549 --> 00:10:34.750 So it goes from providing to motive. What we 00:10:34.750 --> 00:10:41.080 have before us is one of the greatest in all 00:10:41.080 --> 00:10:43.840 of biblical history. But I want to tell you, 00:10:43.860 --> 00:10:45.879 the Apostle Paul did not sit down one day and 00:10:45.879 --> 00:10:49.720 say, you know something? I would like to write 00:10:49.720 --> 00:10:53.419 a literary masterpiece. I'd like to write something 00:10:53.419 --> 00:10:55.179 that people, whether they were Christians or 00:10:55.179 --> 00:10:57.220 non -Christians all over the world, when there 00:10:57.220 --> 00:11:00.279 was ever a wedding, they would read this. I want 00:11:00.279 --> 00:11:03.340 to provide something for people who love to decoupage. 00:11:04.539 --> 00:11:07.200 I want plaques to be filled in future Christian 00:11:07.200 --> 00:11:10.259 stores all over the world. I want it to be put 00:11:10.259 --> 00:11:13.980 with little lists of poems. You know, Ralph, 00:11:14.100 --> 00:11:17.100 Waldo, Emerson, Apostle Paul. If I speak with 00:11:17.100 --> 00:11:20.139 the tongues of men and of angels, yet have not 00:11:20.139 --> 00:11:25.600 love, right? If I prophesy, you know, he was 00:11:25.600 --> 00:11:28.419 not trying to do that. In fact, what you're going 00:11:28.419 --> 00:11:30.820 to find is we're going to spend our time and 00:11:30.820 --> 00:11:33.039 we're going to walk through this. He doesn't 00:11:33.039 --> 00:11:36.940 even define love in 1 Corinthians 13. He gives 00:11:36.940 --> 00:11:40.840 us 15 descriptions of love, beginning at verse 00:11:40.840 --> 00:11:44.440 four. And in the 15 descriptions, I'll show you 00:11:44.440 --> 00:11:48.259 a little bit later, he takes at least 15 of their 00:11:48.259 --> 00:11:53.230 dysfunctional, hurtful, bad. superficial, relational 00:11:53.230 --> 00:11:56.330 fallout behaviors, and every one of these things 00:11:56.330 --> 00:11:59.309 is a corrective so that they will be loving in 00:11:59.309 --> 00:12:01.610 their relationships. This is a very practical 00:12:01.610 --> 00:12:04.649 chapter. He's talking about instead of suing 00:12:04.649 --> 00:12:06.730 one another, here's how you do. Instead of feeling 00:12:06.730 --> 00:12:08.570 hurt and rejected and betrayed and gossiping 00:12:08.570 --> 00:12:10.409 about people, here's what you do. Instead of 00:12:10.409 --> 00:12:12.330 living this way, here's what you do. Instead 00:12:12.330 --> 00:12:14.429 of shacking up with your mother -in -law and 00:12:14.429 --> 00:12:17.929 being sexually immoral, here's what you do. I 00:12:17.929 --> 00:12:21.399 mean, this church had major problems. But if 00:12:21.399 --> 00:12:24.200 we're going to love more, the danger is that 00:12:24.200 --> 00:12:26.360 we will think that love is a ooey -gooey feeling. 00:12:26.799 --> 00:12:32.039 And now I have, I feel better, God. I had 17 00:12:32.039 --> 00:12:35.240 .5 seconds of ooey -gooey feelings with my wife 00:12:35.240 --> 00:12:37.779 and 11 .7 seconds of ooey -gooey feelings with 00:12:37.779 --> 00:12:40.679 one of my kids. Or I'm a single person and I 00:12:40.679 --> 00:12:45.419 had coffee and we had a deep talk and I feel 00:12:45.419 --> 00:12:50.879 better. Now, all those things may be good. But 00:12:50.879 --> 00:12:54.440 here's the question. If simplifying your life 00:12:54.440 --> 00:12:57.340 never works by just saying you're gonna do less, 00:12:57.559 --> 00:13:00.639 but the secret is loving more, the fundamental 00:13:00.639 --> 00:13:04.379 question is, what is love and how do you practice 00:13:04.379 --> 00:13:07.580 it? What does it really mean to be loving? And 00:13:07.580 --> 00:13:09.299 I'm gonna get us started and we're gonna start 00:13:09.299 --> 00:13:12.940 real small and we're gonna learn to start loving 00:13:12.940 --> 00:13:17.519 what love really is, not an emotion, not a good 00:13:17.519 --> 00:13:21.620 feeling. but a choice to treat other people in 00:13:21.620 --> 00:13:23.460 a way that you don't have the power apart from 00:13:23.460 --> 00:13:25.720 God giving it to you. But we're gonna learn to 00:13:25.720 --> 00:13:27.899 love other people. And I want you to start with 00:13:27.899 --> 00:13:31.919 those closest to you. Family, friends, spouse, 00:13:32.320 --> 00:13:37.799 irritating in -laws. And so notice what he says. 00:13:38.509 --> 00:13:42.230 Verse four, love is patient, love is kind. It 00:13:42.230 --> 00:13:44.850 does not envy, it does not boast, it's not proud. 00:13:44.929 --> 00:13:47.370 Just underline love is patient, love is kind. 00:13:47.549 --> 00:13:49.370 That's all I'm gonna cover today. We're gonna 00:13:49.370 --> 00:13:52.509 take one baby step toward how to become more 00:13:52.509 --> 00:13:55.230 loving people because as your love will get deeper 00:13:55.230 --> 00:13:59.309 and deeper and practical this week, you will 00:13:59.309 --> 00:14:02.669 gravitate and spend energy and time there and 00:14:02.669 --> 00:14:06.389 you'll start doing less and loving more. You're 00:14:06.389 --> 00:14:08.750 listening to Living on the Edge. We'll get you 00:14:08.750 --> 00:14:11.450 back to today's program in just a second. But 00:14:11.450 --> 00:14:13.509 first, did you know that other believers are 00:14:13.509 --> 00:14:16.230 paramount to your faith journey? Keep listening 00:14:16.230 --> 00:14:19.149 after this message as Chip explains why and highlights 00:14:19.149 --> 00:14:21.590 some resources we have to get you into authentic 00:14:21.590 --> 00:14:24.450 community today. Stick around to learn more. 00:14:24.649 --> 00:14:28.350 But for now, here again is Chip. Love is patient. 00:14:28.429 --> 00:14:32.629 The word is macrothumus. Macro meaning broad 00:14:32.629 --> 00:14:35.950 or to spread out. Thumus has the idea of passion. 00:14:37.220 --> 00:14:41.919 Some translators say it is to have a long, long 00:14:41.919 --> 00:14:46.360 suffering. The idea is only used, it's not in 00:14:46.360 --> 00:14:48.759 reference to being patient with circumstances. 00:14:49.100 --> 00:14:51.679 This word has to do with being patient with people. 00:14:52.720 --> 00:14:54.759 This is that when someone says a little remark 00:14:54.759 --> 00:14:56.580 that hurts your feelings and so you shut down 00:14:56.580 --> 00:14:58.919 and turn on the remote. This is someone who, 00:14:59.019 --> 00:15:01.899 you know, you wanted to be romantic on a certain 00:15:01.899 --> 00:15:03.960 evening and you got turned down. So you decide, 00:15:03.980 --> 00:15:05.700 you know what? I'm just not gonna respond to 00:15:05.700 --> 00:15:08.679 her. or him. This is that little comment that 00:15:08.679 --> 00:15:10.320 your parents make, and you just say, well, forget 00:15:10.320 --> 00:15:11.860 it. I'm going to shut my door and, you know, 00:15:11.879 --> 00:15:14.299 video game. This is someone at school who says 00:15:14.299 --> 00:15:16.279 something to you to hurt your feelings, and you 00:15:16.279 --> 00:15:18.740 just find yourself telling another friend what 00:15:18.740 --> 00:15:20.759 a jerk, and how she's stuck up, and who does 00:15:20.759 --> 00:15:25.019 he think he is. This is a different way to respond 00:15:25.019 --> 00:15:28.240 to hurt. Basically, love is patient, love is 00:15:28.240 --> 00:15:30.879 kind. He's addressing the same issue. It's one 00:15:30.879 --> 00:15:33.820 coin. The issue is this and write this down. 00:15:33.980 --> 00:15:37.759 How do I respond when people hurt me? And you 00:15:37.759 --> 00:15:39.399 don't have to be in the church long to know you're 00:15:39.399 --> 00:15:42.580 gonna get hurt. And we hurt one another in families 00:15:42.580 --> 00:15:44.960 and we hurt one another in friends and we hurt 00:15:44.960 --> 00:15:46.919 one another in ball teams and we hurt one another 00:15:46.919 --> 00:15:50.620 in business. How do you respond when a word or 00:15:50.620 --> 00:15:53.580 an action or a neglect or someone doesn't invite 00:15:53.580 --> 00:15:57.259 you or someone says something about you? How 00:15:57.259 --> 00:15:59.519 do you respond when there's a little hurt or 00:15:59.519 --> 00:16:02.679 a wound? My reaction is, I'm gonna do it back. 00:16:03.360 --> 00:16:06.019 Or I'll passive aggressively say, did you hear 00:16:06.019 --> 00:16:09.000 what he did to me? Or she did that, therefore, 00:16:09.240 --> 00:16:11.779 you know, some of you will lash out with your 00:16:11.779 --> 00:16:14.899 words. Some of you will pay back later. Some 00:16:14.899 --> 00:16:16.720 of you will passive aggressively leak and be 00:16:16.720 --> 00:16:19.360 sarcastic. Some of you will cut your parents 00:16:19.360 --> 00:16:22.539 off. This passage says, you wanna learn to become 00:16:22.539 --> 00:16:26.700 loving. Here's what it says. Love is patient. 00:16:27.019 --> 00:16:29.440 Then the word kind is only used in this form 00:16:29.440 --> 00:16:32.720 in the New Testament. And it's giving a undeserved 00:16:32.720 --> 00:16:36.539 response of goodness, winsomeness, and encouragement 00:16:36.539 --> 00:16:41.120 to the person who's wounded you. Love absorbs 00:16:41.120 --> 00:16:46.059 the blow and returns a hug. And it says, you 00:16:46.059 --> 00:16:49.080 don't deserve this and I can't give it in my 00:16:49.080 --> 00:16:52.259 strength. But you said that to me and it hurt 00:16:52.259 --> 00:16:54.759 my feeling. I'm going to go to the bedroom and 00:16:54.759 --> 00:16:56.779 I'm going to forgive you. And now I'm going to 00:16:56.779 --> 00:16:58.919 think about how could I affirm and encourage 00:16:58.919 --> 00:17:01.980 you? Because most people who hurt you, it usually 00:17:01.980 --> 00:17:04.380 comes out of a wound in their own life. Can you 00:17:04.380 --> 00:17:06.380 imagine what's going to happen in relationships 00:17:06.380 --> 00:17:11.440 if that's all we do? Love absorbs the blow and 00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:14.839 gives a hug. Now, some of you have some historic 00:17:14.839 --> 00:17:16.880 situations and there's some abuse situations 00:17:16.880 --> 00:17:19.619 and issues that you have kind of in background. 00:17:19.799 --> 00:17:22.420 And this does not mean that, you know, you go 00:17:22.420 --> 00:17:24.240 home now and say that, you know, the father that 00:17:24.240 --> 00:17:26.359 abused you sexually, you know, do you think we 00:17:26.359 --> 00:17:27.940 could form a meeting? I learned from God I'm 00:17:27.940 --> 00:17:31.740 supposed to hug you. No, no, no, no, okay? Let's 00:17:31.740 --> 00:17:34.759 not oversimplify. There's issues and boundaries. 00:17:35.519 --> 00:17:38.059 But let's just start with the everyday relationships 00:17:38.059 --> 00:17:41.130 of where we live in our homes. or in our apartments 00:17:41.130 --> 00:17:44.490 with roommates, and at work, and our neighborhood. 00:17:44.569 --> 00:17:48.569 And let's say, what would happen if we absorbed 00:17:48.569 --> 00:17:51.809 the blow like a pillow and we returned a hug? 00:17:53.650 --> 00:17:57.569 It's really what Jesus did, isn't it? When he 00:17:57.569 --> 00:18:02.049 was on the cross, he was hurt, rejected, beaten. 00:18:02.670 --> 00:18:04.609 And it wasn't just by those people, it was by 00:18:04.609 --> 00:18:08.269 our sin. And what would he do? He absorbed the 00:18:08.269 --> 00:18:11.539 blow. into your hands, Lord, I commit my spirit. 00:18:12.599 --> 00:18:17.460 And then he died. He rose from the dead and his 00:18:17.460 --> 00:18:24.059 father forgave him. He was kind. He loved. And 00:18:24.059 --> 00:18:25.220 we're going to learn, you know what that does? 00:18:25.339 --> 00:18:30.400 It never fails. It's powerful. This is supernaturally 00:18:30.400 --> 00:18:33.619 responding to evil with good. This is just normal 00:18:33.619 --> 00:18:36.240 for God's people. And so let me give you a little 00:18:36.240 --> 00:18:39.039 assignment. What does your life and schedule 00:18:39.039 --> 00:18:40.640 indicate you want to be known for? That would 00:18:40.640 --> 00:18:42.240 be a real honest one to answer, wouldn't it? 00:18:43.059 --> 00:18:45.279 Second, what's the biggest barrier to you slowing 00:18:45.279 --> 00:18:48.680 down and simplifying your life? Jot that down. 00:18:49.559 --> 00:18:51.519 Have coffee and talk with someone that you can 00:18:51.519 --> 00:18:54.039 trust that's safe over that one. Third, how can 00:18:54.039 --> 00:18:55.859 you begin to be more loving this week and with 00:18:55.859 --> 00:18:58.539 whom? Let's get to one person. Just as you're 00:18:58.539 --> 00:19:00.319 thinking right now, write someone's name down. 00:19:00.809 --> 00:19:03.730 Who is it that has a little wound, a little hurt, 00:19:03.849 --> 00:19:05.910 a little dissing, you feel a little rejection? 00:19:06.210 --> 00:19:09.390 Who could you just absorb the blow, forgive them, 00:19:09.470 --> 00:19:13.990 and give them a hug of some sorts? Might be a 00:19:13.990 --> 00:19:19.109 note. Might be a word of encouragement. Might 00:19:19.109 --> 00:19:20.569 be bringing something up and telling them you 00:19:20.569 --> 00:19:22.029 forgive them. I don't know what it is. God will 00:19:22.029 --> 00:19:25.750 show you. And then here, finally, why is it so 00:19:25.750 --> 00:19:29.859 critical to understand? How much God loves you 00:19:29.859 --> 00:19:33.359 in order to become more loving. So your first 00:19:33.359 --> 00:19:35.579 assignment, are you ready? Your first assignment 00:19:35.579 --> 00:19:38.279 is not go be more patient and kind and loving. 00:19:38.819 --> 00:19:42.059 Your first assignment is to let God do that for 00:19:42.059 --> 00:19:49.039 you. Some of us, the reason it's so hard to love, 00:19:49.079 --> 00:19:51.539 we don't let God love us. When we mess up, we 00:19:51.539 --> 00:19:53.900 beat ourselves up. We feel condemned. I'll try 00:19:53.900 --> 00:19:56.839 harder. Yesterday, I did one of the dumbest moves 00:19:56.839 --> 00:19:59.940 in my car probably in the last 10 years. And 00:19:59.940 --> 00:20:01.960 I got in the wrong lane. And then I cut over 00:20:01.960 --> 00:20:06.099 about two and a half lanes to make a freeway 00:20:06.099 --> 00:20:09.400 exit. And as I pulled through, and I kind of 00:20:09.400 --> 00:20:11.799 had it, but I did it too fast. I did it too quick. 00:20:12.119 --> 00:20:13.839 And then I didn't see it. And a guy was out in 00:20:13.839 --> 00:20:19.119 the crosswalk. And, you know, he got by. And 00:20:19.119 --> 00:20:23.480 I just, because I was in a hurry, I mean, I just 00:20:23.480 --> 00:20:26.619 thought. And then it was real quiet. Teresa looked 00:20:26.619 --> 00:20:28.740 at me like, oh, my. And she should have just 00:20:28.740 --> 00:20:32.299 wailed on me. And I finally said, are you okay? 00:20:32.400 --> 00:20:34.720 She goes, yeah. She goes, you know, you almost 00:20:34.720 --> 00:20:37.539 hit that guy. I said, I know it. And then I thought 00:20:37.539 --> 00:20:40.329 of. how my whole life could be different because 00:20:40.329 --> 00:20:44.410 of a hurried, stupid, foolish act. And then I 00:20:44.410 --> 00:20:46.910 started on this journey of, you know, Chip, you 00:20:46.910 --> 00:20:48.630 know, you're not this, you're not this, you're 00:20:48.630 --> 00:20:50.170 not this, you're not this. And because of this 00:20:50.170 --> 00:20:52.470 message, instead, I just stopped. I said, you 00:20:52.470 --> 00:20:55.970 know, God, thank you for not giving me the consequences 00:20:55.970 --> 00:20:58.630 I may have deserved. And for that man, I just 00:20:58.630 --> 00:21:01.829 totally blew it. Father, I'm so sorry. I want 00:21:01.829 --> 00:21:04.569 to remember you're patient with me. I'm going 00:21:04.569 --> 00:21:07.390 to receive your forgiveness right now. And for 00:21:07.390 --> 00:21:09.710 some of you, you'll never be patient with others 00:21:09.710 --> 00:21:16.289 until you let God be that for you. You're listening 00:21:16.289 --> 00:21:19.130 to Living on the Edge with Chip Ingram. And the 00:21:19.130 --> 00:21:21.450 message you just heard, All You Need Is Love, 00:21:21.690 --> 00:21:24.910 is from our series, Spiritual Simplicity. Chip 00:21:24.910 --> 00:21:26.769 will join us in studio to share some insights 00:21:26.769 --> 00:21:30.029 from today's talk in just a minute. Most of us 00:21:30.029 --> 00:21:33.230 live very hectic lives, moving too fast, demanding 00:21:33.230 --> 00:21:36.519 too much, and delivering too little. If you're 00:21:36.519 --> 00:21:39.119 desperate for an alternative that actually works, 00:21:39.240 --> 00:21:42.000 then this study is for you. Chip's teaching will 00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:44.519 help you escape this destructive pattern and 00:21:44.519 --> 00:21:46.799 reveal how to better prioritize what matters 00:21:46.799 --> 00:21:49.480 most and love others in a fresh, revolutionary 00:21:49.480 --> 00:21:52.500 way. If you've missed any part of this series, 00:21:52.619 --> 00:21:54.819 catch up anytime through the Chip Ingram app. 00:21:55.509 --> 00:21:58.069 Well, Chip's back with me in studio, and Chip, 00:21:58.069 --> 00:21:59.730 in this series, we're learning what it means 00:21:59.730 --> 00:22:03.329 to do less and love more. And a practical way 00:22:03.329 --> 00:22:05.309 we can do that is by being part of a genuine 00:22:05.309 --> 00:22:08.269 community of believers. Take a minute, if you 00:22:08.269 --> 00:22:10.289 would, and explain why that's an essential part 00:22:10.289 --> 00:22:12.710 of our Christian walk. Well, Dave, I'll tell 00:22:12.710 --> 00:22:15.970 you. I don't want to oversimplify, but Jesus 00:22:15.970 --> 00:22:18.680 said, I came that you might have life. and have 00:22:18.680 --> 00:22:21.519 it more abundantly. At the heart of the Christian 00:22:21.519 --> 00:22:24.920 life, it's allowing Jesus to live his life through 00:22:24.920 --> 00:22:28.380 you by the power of the Holy Spirit, rooted in 00:22:28.380 --> 00:22:30.740 the Word of God in the context of community. 00:22:31.119 --> 00:22:35.019 And that little word, bio, means life. And so 00:22:35.019 --> 00:22:37.079 I've just taken that acronym here, Living on 00:22:37.079 --> 00:22:40.269 the Edge, and it simplifies it for me. If you 00:22:40.269 --> 00:22:43.369 want the life of Christ lived out, it means B, 00:22:43.650 --> 00:22:47.170 you have to get before God daily and before him 00:22:47.170 --> 00:22:50.190 with other people weekly in worship. The I is 00:22:50.190 --> 00:22:53.430 for in community. You have to do life with people 00:22:53.430 --> 00:22:56.490 heart to heart, face to face. And the O is on 00:22:56.490 --> 00:23:00.650 mission 24 -7. What I've seen so much is people 00:23:00.650 --> 00:23:04.410 have lost the in community aspect. It's impossible 00:23:04.410 --> 00:23:08.829 to obey the word of God to experience life by 00:23:08.829 --> 00:23:11.950 yourself. So what we've done is we've put all 00:23:11.950 --> 00:23:15.269 of our small group resources on sale to encourage 00:23:15.269 --> 00:23:18.230 you to get in community. Get with a group of 00:23:18.230 --> 00:23:20.910 people. Watch the videos on your own, then discuss 00:23:20.910 --> 00:23:24.210 them. Do it live. Do it online. Do it however 00:23:24.210 --> 00:23:27.250 it works best. But take the next step. Get in 00:23:27.250 --> 00:23:29.980 community. You'll never regret it. Thanks, Chip. 00:23:30.099 --> 00:23:32.660 Well, we have a growing library of small group 00:23:32.660 --> 00:23:35.640 resources on a wide range of topics, and they're 00:23:35.640 --> 00:23:38.859 so easy to use. Chip provides the teaching. Then 00:23:38.859 --> 00:23:40.779 you'll have time to discuss what you've heard 00:23:40.779 --> 00:23:43.880 alongside our helpful study guides. We also offer 00:23:43.880 --> 00:23:46.299 some insights for leaders to effectively lead 00:23:46.299 --> 00:23:48.960 their groups. If you're not in a small group 00:23:48.960 --> 00:23:51.460 yet or looking for your next topic to study, 00:23:51.579 --> 00:23:54.509 check out our resources. And as Chip said, for 00:23:54.509 --> 00:23:57.150 a limited time, we've discounted all of our small 00:23:57.150 --> 00:23:59.750 group resources so you can get into community 00:23:59.750 --> 00:24:03.509 today. To learn more, go to livingontheedge .org 00:24:03.509 --> 00:24:09.710 or call us at 888 -333 -6003. That's 888 -333 00:24:09.710 --> 00:24:15.190 -6003 or livingontheedge .org. App listeners 00:24:15.190 --> 00:24:18.369 tap special offers. Well, with that, Chip, let's 00:24:18.369 --> 00:24:21.130 get to your application we promised. Thanks, 00:24:21.190 --> 00:24:23.470 Dave. You know, as we close today's program, 00:24:23.910 --> 00:24:27.150 it brought to my mind the story that I told at 00:24:27.150 --> 00:24:30.289 the very end of today's broadcast where I'm just 00:24:30.289 --> 00:24:33.289 going to be honest with you. Earlier in my life, 00:24:33.369 --> 00:24:36.250 and it's not all that long ago, I mean, I was 00:24:36.250 --> 00:24:38.170 that person that was always looking for which 00:24:38.170 --> 00:24:40.529 lane, you know, is moving faster, and I'd go 00:24:40.529 --> 00:24:43.400 to that lane and that lane. In that story, I 00:24:43.400 --> 00:24:45.700 don't know why, but I was in a real hurry, and 00:24:45.700 --> 00:24:48.140 I moved from lane to lane to lane, and I looked 00:24:48.140 --> 00:24:49.960 one way, then the other, and then I started to 00:24:49.960 --> 00:24:52.519 pull out. And, you know, the guy had a, you know, 00:24:52.559 --> 00:24:54.700 the little white sign that says he can walk, 00:24:54.819 --> 00:24:57.319 and he was walking, and I looked up, and I mean, 00:24:57.339 --> 00:25:00.480 I slammed on the brakes, and my heart stopped. 00:25:00.680 --> 00:25:04.119 I came within about a foot of hitting that guy, 00:25:04.200 --> 00:25:06.720 and I would have not hit him a little. It would 00:25:06.720 --> 00:25:09.529 have been really, really bad. And I remember 00:25:09.529 --> 00:25:12.710 the emotion just as I rethink that in my mind 00:25:12.710 --> 00:25:15.529 and the look that I got from Teresa and realized, 00:25:15.609 --> 00:25:19.390 I mean, my whole life or that guy's life could 00:25:19.390 --> 00:25:22.029 be completely different if I would have hit him. 00:25:22.150 --> 00:25:25.650 And praise God, I didn't. But what it hit at 00:25:25.650 --> 00:25:29.450 my heart was, Chip, why are you in such a hurry? 00:25:29.509 --> 00:25:32.450 Where are you going that's so much more important 00:25:32.450 --> 00:25:35.880 than everyone else? And this series was birthed 00:25:35.880 --> 00:25:38.279 some time ago. And I just want to tell you, because 00:25:38.279 --> 00:25:40.599 sometimes, you know, we all hear a message or 00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:43.259 we hear a series and, you know, we move on and 00:25:43.259 --> 00:25:45.859 we make some small applications, but you need 00:25:45.859 --> 00:25:47.859 to look back a year or two and not that much 00:25:47.859 --> 00:25:50.799 changed. I have to tell you, I studied this passage 00:25:50.799 --> 00:25:54.619 and got new insights from 1 Corinthians 13, and 00:25:54.619 --> 00:25:58.240 it started a transformation in my life. And the 00:25:58.240 --> 00:26:02.220 transformation was to slow down. I remember Dallas 00:26:02.220 --> 00:26:07.470 Willard. talking about how impossible it is to 00:26:07.470 --> 00:26:10.910 grow spiritually and to grow deep if you're in 00:26:10.910 --> 00:26:14.849 a hurry. John Mark Comer later wrote a book built 00:26:14.849 --> 00:26:17.369 much off of what Dallas Willard and John Ortberg 00:26:17.369 --> 00:26:21.390 had written about ruthlessly eliminating hurry 00:26:21.390 --> 00:26:24.569 from your life. But here's what I want to say 00:26:24.569 --> 00:26:28.009 to you. You're never going to love more unless 00:26:28.009 --> 00:26:31.869 you slow down. And one of my practices was when 00:26:31.869 --> 00:26:34.670 I went to the grocery store, and I did this for 00:26:34.670 --> 00:26:37.990 like six months, I got in the longest line. When 00:26:37.990 --> 00:26:40.789 I got in traffic, I did this for actually almost 00:26:40.789 --> 00:26:43.970 two years. I had to break my addiction. I drove 00:26:43.970 --> 00:26:47.650 in the right -hand lane. It was painful. And 00:26:47.650 --> 00:26:49.750 I just thought, you know, I guess I'm going to 00:26:49.750 --> 00:26:52.109 go the speed limit and stay here. And if there 00:26:52.109 --> 00:26:53.890 was a super slow car, I'd go around it and then 00:26:53.890 --> 00:26:56.650 get back in that right lane. And what I found 00:26:56.650 --> 00:26:59.609 is my stress went down. I had time to think. 00:27:00.009 --> 00:27:03.809 I wasn't in a hurry. I'm going to ask you today, 00:27:03.930 --> 00:27:07.009 just this week for the next seven days, would 00:27:07.009 --> 00:27:10.150 you be willing to drive in the right -hand lane 00:27:10.150 --> 00:27:13.549 and not go fast? Just this week, if you don't 00:27:13.549 --> 00:27:15.450 like that one, would you be willing, when you 00:27:15.450 --> 00:27:18.109 go to the grocery store, how about this? Not 00:27:18.109 --> 00:27:20.930 the shortest line or not the longest line. How 00:27:20.930 --> 00:27:23.930 about the middle line? And refuse to look back 00:27:23.930 --> 00:27:26.029 and forth to see which one's moving the fastest. 00:27:26.809 --> 00:27:29.809 and relax in that line and refuse to pull out 00:27:29.809 --> 00:27:32.150 your phone and try and accomplish something, 00:27:32.410 --> 00:27:36.210 you might find that if you become present with 00:27:36.210 --> 00:27:39.890 where you are and you slow down your life, you 00:27:39.890 --> 00:27:42.710 will start to experience the very things that 00:27:42.710 --> 00:27:46.539 God wants most for you. Love. Great word, Chip. 00:27:46.660 --> 00:27:49.240 And as we close, I want you to know that as a 00:27:49.240 --> 00:27:51.660 staff, we ask the Lord to help you take whatever 00:27:51.660 --> 00:27:54.559 your next faith step is. And we'd love to hear 00:27:54.559 --> 00:27:56.880 how it's going. Would you take a minute and send 00:27:56.880 --> 00:27:59.259 us a quick note or give us a call? Either one 00:27:59.259 --> 00:28:03.079 is easy. Email us at chipatlivingontheedge .org 00:28:03.079 --> 00:28:10.440 or call 888 -333 -6003. That's 888 -333 -6003 00:28:10.440 --> 00:28:15.619 or email chipatlivingontheedge .org. We can't 00:28:15.619 --> 00:28:17.900 wait to hear from you. For Chip and the entire 00:28:17.900 --> 00:28:20.319 team here, this is Dave Drewy, thanking you for 00:28:20.319 --> 00:28:22.660 listening to this edition of Living on the Edge, 00:28:22.759 --> 00:28:24.720 and I hope you'll join us again next time.