My name's Travis. And I'm Emma. And this is Bestie
Approved. What's the last song you listened to?
It was Video Games by Lana Del Rey. Love that.
A classic. It is a classic. Mine was Maybe You're
the Problem by Ava Max. Who we love. I love Ava
Max. Yeah. Do you know for the longest time I
thought she was from like Sweden or like a Nordic
country or something, but it turns out she's
from like Ohio or something. Interesting. I would
have guessed Florida. In my mind's eye, you were
going to say Florida. Oh, I can see Florida.
No, but like, I don't know why I thought she
was from like. Are you looking it up? Yeah, I
don't know. Well, her parents. Hmm. She's from
Milwaukee. Milwaukee. Which is crazy. Yeah. How
do you become Ava Max in Wisconsin? Well, how
do you become Trixie Mattel in Wisconsin? I really
don't know. That's a fair question. Anyways.
Anyway, so today, Emma and I did our daily FaceTime.
Emma, I want from your perspective, I want you
to tell the world how I just woke up full of
venom and anger and haste. And I, you know, OK,
the other thing is I wake up at 6 a .m. and I
immediately am a mother all morning long. And
so I don't really have an outlet for my anger
or haste. And so I drop Jack off, all is well
and good. And I decide to go get a bagel while
I wait for the CVS pharmacy to open because I,
whatever. Worst bagel I've ever had in my life.
And I get back in my car and I go, ugh. And then
I go get my stuff from CVS. And then I come home
and I'm like, wow, I wish we had a punching bag.
Like, I just am full. I just, you know, you wake
up on the wrong side of the bed. There's your
audio. There it is. Oh, good. I guess I'll just
fucking kill myself. I didn't mean to cut you
off. I'm sorry. But like Emma's audio, like where
we record looked so quiet. And then the second
she moved her mic, it was like, oh, it's normal.
It usually sounds better if I hold it like down
there, but not today. Today is just not my day.
I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
I like can feel that I have a little cut or something
on my tongue that's pissing me off. That's actually
the worst, to be fair. I'm just in a bad fucking
mood. That's it. That's all. So let me tell you
how I experienced it this morning. Yeah. So I
FaceTime her and it was probably like. nine o
'clock in the morning and i was like oh she's
probably like taking jack to school or something
like i was doing laundry which is like yeah i
was like putting stuff away my hands were full
she didn't answer and that's fine so then i was
playing with boomer and then i hear my phone
go off and i was like oh emma's facetiming me
back and i was like it's gonna be the best day
ever i'm gonna talk to my best friend Today,
I have no sunshine in my pocket. I got a pocket
full of rain clouds. Not sunshine. I open up
FaceTime. And I was like, hi. And she goes, what's
up? Oh, yeah. That's not surprising to me. And
I was like, I just wanted to check on you. She
goes, yeah, what's up? Oh, I don't even remember
saying that. And then I had goldfish pretzels
that I was eating and I knew the instant that
I put one in my mouth that it was a mistake.
And Emma was going on about like, oh, yeah, like
I woke up in a bad mood. I was like, oh, we all
have those days. It's not a big deal. And then
I like crunched on one of the goldfish pretzels
because that actually made it worse. I can't.
I am in such a bad mood. I also have the most
annoying dog on planet Earth. I love him to death,
but he's a little tiny little rat. And all he
does all day is follow me around and lick his
lips. And so I have just had a time today. Yeah,
you've had a rough day. I also. I asked Kenny
yesterday when he got a haircut to ask the people
at the salon where he gets his haircut if they
can cut my hair because they do men and women
there. And I wanted him to ask because it's like
an Asian salon. Like, oh, cool. The owners are
Korean, whatever, whatever. And I was like, show
them a picture of my hair because it's like curly.
It's just like wavy and thick. You do a lot of
hair. Ask them if they can cut my hair. Because
the lady I normally go to is perpetually booked
out like three months. And I, once I decide I
need a haircut, cannot wait three months. This
is the one that Sky Lee sent you to? Yeah. And
like if I were as on top of my life as Sky Lee
is, she would be perfect. Like she does a great
job on my hair. Once you decide you need an appointment,
you have to wait three months and I just can't
do it. That is insane. So Kenny asked last night
and the lady said, yeah, for sure. Just send
her my number and we'll like schedule her or
whatever. He never sent me her number. So I texted
him this morning and I said, are you going to
send me Kat's number? Are you uncomfortable with
me going there? I just feel so full of rage.
You have said, I will take every man in my life
and make him the victim. Suffer everybody but
Jack. Because I do think it's funny when I'm
in this type of mood and Kenny and Jack are both
home. I'll like be talking to Jack and be like,
yeah, how do you feel about that? What do you
want to eat for dinner? How's your day? And then
I'll turn around to Kenny and go. So. Yeah. I
love that. This is where I am. It is where you're
at. Anyway. I took my first trip ever to a Dollar
General. Have we talked about this? Yeah. So
I went to the Dollar General. There's a Dollar
General in my town and like. the dollar general
like their business model is problematic to begin
with because what they do is create food deserts
like that is actually a thing that they do but
like i didn't want to drive all the way to east
washington street because all i wanted was a
box of raisinets right it doesn't dollar tree
do the same thing where they like just pop up
all over the anyway but at least dollar tree
is honest about their pricing yeah that's true
so whatever but dollar general i was like let
me go in here and um let me get a box of raisinets
because like anytime I'm having a really good
hankering for Raisinets. And I know I'm like
I'm a person that's nine million years old. I
love Raisinets. I won't be attacked for it. I'm
sorry. I love Raisinets. Oh, you know what I
do? This is so sick and twisted. You know how
I do this, too, where when you go to the movies,
you put M &Ms in your popcorn and they get a
little like melty and delicious. I've done that
with Raisinets. Oh, that's magical. It's. So
messy and so delicious. It's not for anyone to
judge, though. It's dark in there. No one has
to see the chocolate between you and God. Yeah.
Anyway, really delicious. Highly recommend. So
I went to the Dollar General and let me let me
tell you about the Dollar General in my town.
So I go in. And the place is a pole barn and
literally in the middle of a field. They like
mowed down part of a cornfield to put in this
Dollar General. And this Dollar General went
up in 14 minutes. Like there's no way they spent
any time designing this place. Right. I go in.
There's one person working there. I find the
candy aisle. I go by the Raisinets. I was so
excited. The person working there is gone. I
don't know where the person is. very common dollar
general experience because there's literally
one person in that entire store right so if they
have to do anything that is not at the cash register
you gotta wait right yeah which is so funny because
why do they put in like five cash registers why
even put them there oh they don't they put in
one cash register seven self -checkouts that
you cannot use they they they're turned off it's
been upwards of like eight years since i've been
to a dollar general so they did not have a self
-checkout but they did have like five checkout
lanes and i was like why there's one person here
anyway yeah so i go up there to check out right
i um i was like oh the person's gone oh wait
a minute and You know how like some places have
like a bell or something like where you can like
ring it or like a doorbell, whatever. It's like
signal. I won't do it. Do you want to know what
this fucking dollar general had? You screaming.
Hello. What? A cowbell. Not a cowbell. There's
no chance. I'm ringing a cowbell. I gunned to
my head. I was like, this can't be real. You
must want me to steal because I'm not doing that.
I said, I'm just going to sit here. I'm going
to sit here for the next however long it takes.
And if I if it's too long, that's just the decider
on whether or not the raisinets were that important
to me. I guess. Take care of Zanette's sister.
It's on them. There's no one up there. Higher
security. I don't know. Oh, it's even worse.
They have signs of people that were caught stealing
from this place. Like, it's like they print out
from their security cameras. They used to do
that at the Circle K on Michigan. They still
do it at the Circle K on Post Road, too. It's
so insane. And I get it. Like, it's a small.
It's not a small business, but it's a business
in a small town. So you're going to shame the
people. Whatever. Sure. But like, I just imagine
the scene that is like seeing someone walk into
your store and then like pointing at their picture.
Do you really have the balls to do that? Or are
you just going to check them out? Or like. i
don't i don't know it's as someone who has worked
in retail there's a zero percent chance i'm walking
up to someone and being like you're banned there's
a sign like i'm not doing that it's not happening
so i pick up my stuff i go and then like i get
home my sister -in -law is at my house i was
like hey I just had the most horrific experience
at Dollar General. And then she goes, oh, Dollar
Tree is much better. You should check out Dollar
Tree. I don't know that I've ever been to a Dollar
Tree. I have. What I will say, I believe the
quality of goods is better at a Dollar General.
That might be a hot take. I don't know. But Dollar
Tree is much more. Well staffed. You're going
to have a better experience there. It doesn't
feel like you're fighting for your life. For
some reason, in a Dollar General, it feels like
someone's mad at you for being there. A Dollar
Tree does not feel that way. Yeah. Well, listener,
if you have any opinions about Dollar General
versus Dollar Tree, let us know. Also, why are
they still called dollar stores when everything
is like three bucks? I don't get that. I don't
know. I did pay $1 .25 for each box of Raisinets.
I bought five of them. It was five for $5. So
it was $1 .25 or five for $5. So. Okay. Made
out like a bandit there. But that's like, sure.
But you used to be able to go to a Dollar Tree
and get like a bottle of hairspray for $1. Or
like. a notebook for one dollar i don't i don't
know what happened to that if i'm being honest
like so this is the thing i i've never been a
dollar store shopper but i've never been like
a frequenter of dollar stores but i remember
that yeah and like i remember when this was like
a thing on the news where like it went from a
dollar to a dollar 25 and people were like protesting
and i was like I guess then don't call it a Dollar
Tree. I don't know. Well, that's what I'm saying.
Like, you would think they would have rebranded.
But I don't know. What are they going to rebrand
to? Like the cheap garbage store? Because like,
I mean, just based on. I don't know. Maybe. But
like based on. Based on the experience of the
Dollar General, if the Dollar Tree has the same
quality of items or lesser, because I cannot
imagine it's. It gets worse. I mean, yeah, I
don't know. It's been years since I've been to
either one of them, to be fair. It's probably
been like five years since I've been to a Dollar
Tree. And like I said, like eight years since
I've been to a Dollar General. But that has been
my experience. I don't know. Well, now we know.
And that's checked off my list, my little bucket
list. I have a question for you, Emma. Would
you pay for a ticket to go to a wedding? If they
don't want a gift. Yeah. Really? Yeah, because
like when I go to a wedding, odds are what you're
getting from me is three hundred dollars. That's
pretty much what I've given every single wedding
that I've gone to. That has been my gift. Three
hundred dollars cash. And so if you. want to
forego your wedding present for me to pay in
advance for my ticket to your wedding, then fine.
Unless I don't want to go to your wedding, here's
the thing. You need to be open to hearing that
people don't give a shit about your wedding if
you're going to start asking them to buy their
tickets. Sure, okay. OK, so, yeah, depends who
it is. If I really want to go to their wedding,
then yes, but they're not getting a gift. And
if I don't want to go to their wedding, then
they're going to have to hear about it. Fair.
I do. I don't know. This is the thing I'm conflicted
about, because. Like, so this is all like this
all comes from an article in People about these.
They call them they fancy themselves entrepreneurs,
Marley Jackson, Steve Larson, who. As a case
like this, the way this article is written is
very I don't I don't love the way this article
is written, but it's like, OK, so the. entrepreneurs
Marley Jacks and Steve Larson sold tickets to
their wedding weekend in Idaho as a case study,
a proof of concept that weddings could be funded,
not financed. Guests could buy a basic $57 ticket
for admission to the wedding day or a three day
experience for two tickets valued at $997 that
allowed access to the wedding day. Plus the pre
and post wedding events. You have to be so conceited.
That's what I'm saying. Like, okay. If you were
like a celebrity, I think it would be a cool
concept. Oh, if this was... I can't stand her,
but someone I can see doing this and being very
successful, that's Larsa Pippen. 100 % Larsa
Pippen could do this and get away with it. I
have Jason Derulo on my mind because he's coming
to my city very randomly for a golf tournament.
Yeah. If Jason Derulo or Larsa Pippen or someone
like that wanted to be like, hey, anyone can
come to my wedding, but you have to buy tickets
to it. I can see that being cool. Absolutely.
That would be sick. But not these random people.
I don't know who these people are. But. And the
fact that you're like, OK, so here's a $60 ticket
to just to show up to the wedding. There's a
$1 ,000 ticket to have the privilege of coming
to all the pre and post wedding events in Idaho
of all places. Like what? Like, did they? How
do they even present this? Like, I don't know.
How do you even? Do you just call all your friends
and you want to be and be like, do you want to
come to my wedding? And I say, yeah. And they
go, OK, great. That'll be a thousand dollars.
What I'll bet you happened is that they made
an Instagram or TikTok or something and sent
it out to everyone that they were going to invite.
But here's the thing. Apparently, the couple
broke even on it and then had money left over.
So they donated one hundred and thirty two thousand
dollars to Village Impact from the proceeds from
this. I have to tell you right now, if I received
a thing saying. You can you can come to our wedding,
but you have to pay for a ticket. I'm not going.
I will not be going because like this is the
whole song and dance of it is you show up to
a wedding and like you're there to celebrate
the couple. I don't want to feel obligated to
be there. I don't like that. Yeah, I do see that
there has been so like discourse I've seen online
is that. When you're buying someone a wedding
gift, you should try to like, and I don't know
that I agree with this. You should try to like
keep in mind how much they paid like per person
in the wedding. No, I'm sorry. Well, I feel like
if you want to celebrate their matrimony and
do the thing, then I don't see a problem with
that. But I don't think that. People should only
be invited to your wedding if they have money.
Now, the problem I have with that is and like,
you know how I feel about this, where it's like
this whole idea of like keeping count. Like it's
like, oh, you spent X. You spent, let's just
say, seventy five dollars a plate for food or
whatever. So I have to spend at least seventy
five dollars for your wedding. No, I don't think
that's. I think the sentiment is I want you to
start your marriage on the right foot and like
in a comfortable place financially. Oh, sure.
OK, that is the sentiment that I've gathered.
That's fine. Because that's like the whole the
whole thing with like. Putting on your registry
the honeymoon fund where like people can donate
to your honeymoon. I'm a million percent fine
with that. I love that. I think it's the same
idea. It's like you want them to be celebrated
and all of this. And so you don't really want
them to like struggle financially from it. No.
And that's the thing, though, is like I think
it comes back to this thing of like. Yeah, if
you're throwing a wedding, if you're throwing
a really, really high -end wedding, you're looking
at anywhere in, like, it's a wide range, but
anywhere in the ballpark of, like, $30 ,000 to
$100 ,000. Not for a high -end wedding, mama.
Not in this day and age. You're looking at at
least $100 ,000. That's insane. Yeah. Like, weddings
are stupid. They are stupid expensive. And there's,
like... Like how there's a pink tax on all feminine
products. They're more expensive because they're
girly. There is an exorbitant wedding tax. Like
a venue for a baby shower or whatever is not
that expensive. But as soon as you say it's for
a wedding, it's a million dollars. Is it because
of the... Like, do they have to take extra liability
insurance out or like, is it just because they
know you're just because they know people will
pay out the nose for a wedding? It's problematic
as fuck. It's really bad. It's really bad. This
is like this whole conversation is like the reason
I am torn about what I would do for my wedding,
because what I would like to do is have a destination
wedding and only invite. like maybe a hundred
people but the thing is a hundred people for
a destination wedding yeah oh that is nothing
for a wedding i would invite like 12 people to
a destination oh no well but that's my thing
is that i would need to be able to afford to
fly anyone out there who tells me that they can't
afford to go Because I don't want anyone to miss
it because they don't have the money. That's
fair. Like and see, that's that's that's why
I would invite like 12 people, because like I
I would assume that I'm on the hook. Like this
is this is where I come from with all this. And
I think this is like just because of the way
I was raised. If you're hosting an event, if
you're putting on an event, you're on the hook
for the event. So like if I'm having a destination
wedding, if I'm saying I want to like I have
to have my wedding in Cabo, Hawaii, wherever.
I believe that like. It will be my Delta Sky
miles that are paid for to come out there. Do
you know what I mean? I feel like a wedding is
the one exception to that. Honestly, maybe because
I feel like everyone's supposed to rally around
you and be like seeing you off to your next stage
of life or whatever. That's fair. I don't know.
OK, but to answer the question, the original
question I asked now, I wouldn't have paid for
tickets for this this wedding. And just know
if I ever do get married. I you're not paying
for the ticket to go to wherever I'm getting
married at. Yeah, I don't know. The drama. Oh,
God. I have one thing I want to talk about. Talk
about it. I've been watching the second season
of Wednesday and I rewatched the first season
because I wanted to like. remember what was happening
and I cannot look away from number one Catherine
Zeta -Jones wow she looks amazing she looks stunning
but most importantly and what I want to talk
about the costumes the clothes their costume
designer eats every time it is so good so so
good every single character looks so good and
so i looked it up and of course this woman designed
the costumes for like johnny depp sweeney todd
sleepy hollow all of these scarier horror movies
and she has like a million oscars and stuff like
that so it's like yeah obviously anyway colleen
you ate good job colleen Um, when's the last
time you felt super patriotic, Emma? I gotta
tell you, never in my life. Never once have I
felt patriotic while voting. Never once have
I. Never. I'm going to tell you, my Apple music
was on shuffle and the Whitney Houston version
of the Star Spangled Banner came on from the
1991 Super Bowl. God, she has the pipes. I listened
to that all the way through because I was like,
what is what am I listening to? And I didn't
like it didn't hit me until like, yeah, we got
into like the chorus. And I was like, oh, my
God, this is Whitney Houston at the 1991 Super
Bowl. And then I have not felt that patriotic
since I voted for Kamala Harris. I did not feel
patriotic voting for Kamala Harris. I did. She's
a cop. Well, did I vote for her? Yes. Yes. Is
she a cop? Yes. Yes. I didn't feel patriotic
voting for Hillary Clinton. Did I vote for her?
Yes. Is she scum of the earth? Yes. I've never
once been like, I love my country. Fair. Francis
Scott Key, you don't do it for me either. I loved
my country when I was listening to Whitney Houston
sing. I do love my country when I go to Taco
Bell. That's helpful. Or Subway. Subway? Yeah.
Whatever. Chan restaurants. Okay, I see what
you're saying. Have you seen this article about
the couple that sold their company for seven
hundred and forty five million dollars, but they
couldn't process it because they felt numb afterwards?
Yeah. Cry me a fucking river. This. I. So there's
a couple who sold their company off to Salesforce,
the CRM company for. seven hundred forty five
million dollars and and then have the nerve to
cry about it well the article is all about like
this company became our identity like work became
our identity and now we wake up and we have nothing
and i'm like you have seven hundred forty five
million dollars like after taxes ostensibly you
will have at least 350 million dollars like let's
just say you are doing the right thing and paying
the amount of taxes you should be paying $350
million free and clear. You're telling me like
a hundred dollar bill and wipe those tears, mama.
Find a hobby. Right. An expensive one. Even start
collecting something. I don't know. Buy a house.
Start another company. This is like what we talked
about in the last episode. People have no idea
what to do out of their life with their lives
outside of being efficient at their job. Well,
that's that's exactly where I was going with
this. It comes back to this whole grind set thing
where it's like, oh, what do we do now? And we
know a couple of people like this. Like we used
to work for a guy like this. i live with a person
like this yeah my papaw's like this like we we
know so many people like this and like on some
level i do respect and appreciate it like i i
love what the person that we used to work for
what he built like i think he is because he's
incredibly generous and he does so much but like
at the same time some of his kids don't talk
to him I never meant to get on this podcast and
say that being hardworking is not an admirable
trait. Right. It is. Yes. It is not admirable
to be so hardworking. You forget how to be a
person. I don't think that's hardworking, though.
I think that that is like I have nothing else.
I'm going all in on this. And like, I think it
stops becoming hardworking at a certain point
and it becomes an obsession. It's like we've
lost the plot of how to be. A person on planet
Earth experiencing life for the first and only
time. Right. And that it sucks because. Like
you, it's this whole idea of like, oh, you can't
even be proud of what you built to to the extent
of a company like Salesforce, like one of the
most powerful and one of the most well -respected
companies in the world wants to buy your brand
from you. You can't even be proud of that. You're
like, I have nothing. Mind you, they have kids.
Yes. Throw yourself into parenthood. Hello. Yeah.
There's so much you could do. What a cool opportunity
to be like, oh, my God. Now I have time to spend
time with my fucking kids. And I don't I will
for the rest of my life. I will never have to
worry about money for the rest of my life. For
the rest of my kids life. They will probably
never have to worry about money. And now. Instead,
they're going to see this article on CNBC about
how you hated your life after you stopped working
the first time that they ever got to see you,
probably. Well, and this is the thing is this
is not the first time they've sold a brand for
millions of dollars. And it's like, well, now
we have to do something else. And I think this
is what I struggle with is like. you will never
find someone who's more of a capitalist pig than
i am i love money i love shopping i love excess
i love all of it like i i do and like that i
yeah i love to order on amazon i think there's
a package on my front porch right now there was
and so we we do this whole song and dance of
like Yeah, like this is this is who we are, but
like you have to be realistic going into it.
I don't I don't want to lose who I am. I don't
want to lose the relationships with my family.
I don't want to do the whole song and dance if
it comes at the cost of only doing the song and
dance. It's literally your whole life. And like
people don't take into account what their life
is because to them, their life is how much money
they have. And it's like, what about your family?
What about having friends? What about a bucket
list? What about like, what do you want to do
in this life other than generate wealth? Right.
Because what is the point of wealth if you never
do anything? Right. What is the point of having
money if all you do is go to work every day?
Well, and this was what I struggled with. And
I had this conversation with the guy that we
used to work with. more so like when i was when
i knew i was leaving and i was like you what
are you doing because like i it was right after
he had me donate it was like a million 1 .2 million
dollars to a high school for them to build a
performing arts thing and i was like yeah do
you ever use this money for you because he was
the cheapest man on god's green earth to just
know that yeah do you ever use this money for
you he goes oh well you know i like i bought
bought my wife a boat. And I was like, but for
you, his splurge for himself was like buying
real estate. Yeah. Yeah. And like, and he's proud
of that golf course, but buying a golf course
is giving yourself another job. Like I was proud
of, it doesn't matter how proud you are. Now
you are the owner of a golf course and that in
itself is a job. You'll remember this. Cause
when we shared an office and he walked by, I,
had the article up that was like this golf course
was voted the number one golf course in the state
of indiana right do you remember this and i was
so proud of him and he could not take pride in
that yeah he was just like yeah he goes oh and
it's like oh you don't care about that you don't
care about the success you know you care about
checking the box and that's what i struggled
with with him because i was like there there
was a lot of problematic stuff to him don't don't
get me wrong about that and like he's an old
white man yes and we fought a lot but like at
the end of the day I do believe he cared about
me and I do believe I cared about him and it
was problematic in its own way but like that
is what it is so that being said I wanted him
to be happy and I like I don't think these people
are happy no and that's my problem with it is
I think your only goal like Your major goal that
all of your other goals should align with is
being happy and content in your life on this
earth. And I don't think you have sight of that.
I don't think you are even going after that if
all you think about is money to the point where
you don't want to go on vacation because then
you'll miss opportunities at work. You don't
want to. Take a month off and be in your son's
life when he has a baby, because then you'll
miss an opportunity at work. You don't you're
not interested in that. And I where is your happiness
coming from? Because I don't see a smile on your
face when you log in and check your bank account.
I don't see that. Like, where does it? I cannot
believe that. numbers on the screen are making
you genuinely happy no well and that's that's
the thing is like I mean even when he did because
he went to what was it was Italy or Spain one
of the two and he called me every single day
30 times a day just to see how everything was
going how the investments were doing like like
the whole thing and I was like Take a fucking
break. Do you remember he got COVID? His wife
is tired of him. His wife. His wife put him out
of the house while he had COVID. Yeah, his wife
hadn't seen him in 50 years because he spent
12 hours a day in the office. And so he was home
with COVID and his wife called the office and
was like, please, God, take him back. I can't
fucking deal with him anymore. Can you imagine
that being? I forgot about that. But can you
imagine that being your life? You have thrown
your whole life away into money to the point
where even your own wife can't stand you. But
that's the thing is like. And that's it's like
it's the devil, you know, is better than the
devil. You don't know that whole saying. And
like I, I love I love both of them. I do like
to this day. I love it because they still call
and check on me like they're there. I believe
they're good people like say what you will. I
do. It's hard because I'm just like, oh, you
guys, this is the life that you live and you've
been running from what life is. And now that
like their businesses are winding down, like
the the individual we worked with is he's pushing
80 and he's like 74. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm just
like, oh, and he's I mean, he had like seven
strokes or something insane like that. He had
a ton of strokes. And I'm just like, you are
running from. who you are because i don't i think
he doesn't have a sense of who he doesn't know
who he is yes i think you're right and that's
i think that's where i'm where i'm at with this
article where it's just like the article talks
about yeah we were in the car and my husband
asked well okay what do we do next and i'm like
what do you mean go to mallorca i don't know
but i just and I understand the privilege that
comes with this conversation, right? Because
there are millions of people out there who are
financially insecure and would do anything to,
you know, live their life for a paycheck if it
meant that they had a place to live and food
to eat and they didn't have to worry and all
of that. So I want to acknowledge that. But like.
I don't even I think even people in those situations
where they are very financially insecure would
agree that they wouldn't want to throw their
family or their whole life or their identity
away in order to attain that. Oh, I think this
is the problem that we have in this country is
it's so all or nothing. Like it's like you're
either the person that we're talking about here
or you're the person that is. poor homeless desolate
on food stamps on medicaid and you feel like
you're worthless there is no space to be yeah
well i think we've lost sight of those two people
being worth the same like at the end of the day
they are both human beings who deserve the same
thing right and maybe this comes with like the
conversation around like the erasure of the middle
class because i i'm i'm gonna be real i do think
that is happening yeah a hundred percent and
So I guess I don't know what the answer is, but
like I do know that. I'm comfortable financially,
I'm fine, like I'm I'm happy with the amount
of money I have in my bank account and I've never
in my life struggled and I understand that. I
do know that. After law school, I. I don't ever
want to be the person who goes home and wakes
up and all I do for the next 18 hours is obsess
over how much money can I make? I don't want
to do it. Yeah, I completely agree. And so, yeah,
I mean, we are two people who are financially
stable, at least you come from money. I don't
come from money, but I'm taken care of. I'm not
having to. worry about it necessarily i just
wanted to acknowledge that there are people who
genuinely have to worry about money and they
would choose to have these champagne problems
over wondering where their next meal is going
to come from etc sure that doesn't mean that
this problem doesn't exist though because it
definitely does we have people who are just throwing
their lives away for a check and it's sad right
are we complaining I've done nothing but complain
all day. Complain again. What I wanted to complain
about are the seasons. Blame global warming or
don't. I don't really care what your stance is.
Summer is way too long. Winter is way too long.
Why is it either 100 degrees or zero degrees
outside? I am tired of it. It used to be once
August hit the first day of school, you would
like get a little chill in the air. You'd be
able to smell fall coming. Not anymore. It is
85 degrees, mama. And by the time it goes down,
it will go down to 40 degrees. Yeah, the swings
are hard, especially in Indiana. I hate it. As
someone with allergies, as someone who doesn't
like to be outside if it's too hot or too cold,
I'm angry. I want fall back and I want spring
back. I love fall and spring, personally. That's
what I'm saying, but we don't get them anymore.
Well, I don't. Yeah, it's hard. Maybe like two
weeks. If that, I mean, in New York, it was you
had like I mean, and I'm not exaggerating. You
had like one one good day in the summer where
like everyone was out. You called into work.
It was like everyone was out running around the
spring. It was like mid April. You would get
that one really, really good day because it was
either oppressively cold or oppressively hot.
And then it would go into summer where it was
like the entire city smelled like pee. And then
you had. probably in the fall two ish good weeks
that's what i'm saying yeah and like it's always
storming during those two weeks too like it's
never actually that good and then it's 30 degrees
Like there's no in between anymore. And I hate
it. I want to see a high of 66 degrees and a
low of 40. That is my ideal day. And I understand
that is colder than most people's ideal day.
But I'm telling you, my day doesn't exist anymore.
Well, we'll take a trip to somewhere where your
ideal day does exist, because I have a feeling
it is in a place that you hate, Utah. Their summers
are hot as hell. But, like, I'm talking about,
like, in the fall we could go to, like, we could
have a live show in Salt Lake City. You know
where I'm convinced they have my perfect day?
France. Ireland. Ireland, yes. Because I'm okay.
I'm actually okay with a little gloom and doom.
I don't need the sun out all the time. And I
feel like they're pretty temperate. Like, I'm
sure it gets hot. And I'm sure they don't have
AC. But, like. Please. Please. Oh, anyway, what
do you want to complain about? I truly thought
today I was going to have nothing to complain
about. I said, wow, this is the first thing that
or the first time on the podcast ever. He had
a pocket full of sunshine. Yeah, I was like,
what? What a day I'm going to have. I pull out
of my fucking driveway. Do you want to know what
was back? Well, the goddamn tandem bike people.
Oh, and so this and people are in love. Shut
up. No. This is not what it's about for me, because
I am convinced and I am not exaggerating. They
were listening to this podcast because these
people were all over the goddamn road. I couldn't
pass them. I couldn't do anything. And then when
I gave them a little because I was like, they're
not wearing helmets. These people will die. Like,
I'm actually worried about these people who are
retirees like God bless them. I. They don't live
on my street. I know that, but I don't know where
they live, but I'm just like, I'm sure they're,
they're the, the ball of their neighborhood.
I love them, whatever, hate them. They are all
over the fucking street. And today I gave him
just a little toot on the horn, just a little
toot toot. And the way that they stopped the
bike in the middle of the street, the guy throws
his hands up in the air. He goes, you're going
to kill someone. And I said, You're on a tandem
fucking bike in the middle of the street. And
it wasn't a full blown fight like I've had. I've
had hundreds of these fights on my road before.
But I was just like. I'm going to I'm going to
pass you and I'm going to hope that this conversation
goes no further. Because I'm not going to kill
someone. I'm going to kill you. And. Maybe this
speaks to a larger sense of entitlement thing
that I have where or that I have with other people
where I'm like, oh, you think you're entitled
to be in the entire road. You think that no one
else has anywhere to be. You think that you are
the most important person on God's green earth
because you're on this fucking tandem bike that
you do not know how to control. Because I'm convinced
because I thought a lot about this since I listened
to the episode where we originally talked about
this. I thought about. You know, maybe maybe
I'm being too hard on these people. And it's
like it's these specific people. And because
surely to God, a normal person on a tandem bike
or two normal people on a tandem bike know how
to control it and not be all over the fucking
road. Yeah, it sounds like they're still figuring
out their tandem bike. Maybe they are in love,
but not synchronized. I don't know. They need
a divorce. Yeah, this is their first sign. Are
you ready for reality roundup? i am okay so we're
on episode one i'm sorry season one episode three
of real housewives of salt lake city it's called
everybody needs a switzerland i don't know why
i put isle in front of season anyway um we get
the opening shots and what are you talking about
what what are you talking about did you just
do that yeah mine doesn't say that oh OK, never
mind. We get the opening shots. Lisa and John
are driving around and Lisa needs a Diet Coke
and tells Henry that he really needs to work
on his Ten Commandments. And he comes up with
thou shalt not smoke and thou shalt not do anything
bad. Like looking at porn. I'm like, OK, sometimes
your kid just says something that you can't really
hold your laugh in about. Like Jack the other
day, he tripped on something and like hit his
rib on his scooter, I think. And he started crying,
but also he farted a million times when it happened.
Poor Jack. I know. Just like all came out of
both ends. So, like, he dries his tears, he's
sitting with me, and of course he's blaming his
pretend sister Gabby for the whole thing. And
he goes, Gabby! You made me cry and fart. I love
that Gabby's such a little client. And I died
laughing. I could not hold my laugh because it
reminded me of that episode of Parks and Rec
where Aziz Ansari's character is saying that
Jerry had a fart attack because he had a heart
attack and he farted. I could not stop laughing.
It was the funniest thing I've ever seen. I love
that so much. Anyway, yeah. Kids are so funny.
Meredith and Brooks are working out, in air quotes,
where they're laying on a table with electrode
things attached to you to kill fat cells. And
Brooks says this is the most he's worked out
in five months. Have you ever done one of those
things? No. Have you? Yeah. And do you know the
science behind it? It shocks fat cells and you
pee a lot. I know you lose water weight. I don't
know that it actually has any beneficial effect,
though. It's certainly not making you stronger.
So God, no. Yeah. Whitney's planning a party
and she goes to an antique store. That's also
a speakeasy. And I hate a theme so much. Where
are they going? Are you where you go into a store
and you have to pretend it's the prohibition?
Oh, yeah. I love a theme store. Don't make me
a part of the scene. Right. Yeah. It's weird.
I don't like if you like it, I love it. Whatever.
No. We go over to where Heather's planning a
baby shower. Right. Because like they're all
pregnant. Five out of the 20 employees are pregnant
and they're pregnant with boys. So Heather wants
to plan something special. Jen shows up. And
this is the thing where I know for a fact at
this point, Jen was the person that this show
was built around because Jen shows up, has no
connection to beauty lab employees. Yeah, she
has. She doesn't know. Yeah. Anyway, Jen's aunt
drove her to Heather's house. And I ask, is this
is this the aunt that had both of her legs amputated?
And you bitch. But also that aunt does have prosthetic
legs. I think they talk about that. Yeah, you
see him at some point, but like this isn't the
same man, right? No, I don't think you can drive
with prosthetic legs. You absolutely can. I'm
looking it up. While you look it up, I'll tell
you. Jen makes her aunt walk her to the door
and she's an absolute asshole going, hurry up.
My feet are freezing as she's wearing open toed
heels in the literal Utah snow. Oh, it is possible
to drive with prosthetic legs, but it depends
on the individual's specific circumstances and
the type of prosthetic. I have a feeling that
if you have weathered the storm with one Miss
Jennifer Shaw, you can probably drive with prosthetic
legs. You understand what hardship and turmoil
is. Right. Yeah, Jen is. She has her toes out
when it's 10 degrees. Yes. And it goes, hurry
up. My feet are freezing. She's so mean to her.
She is so mean to everyone. She's mean to like
the Shaw squad, too. She is evil to them. Yes.
Anyway. So they they're planning the party. Heather
buys a little role or not Rolls Royces. Range
rovers for the kids. It's adorable. The little
like drivable ones. My nephew had one of those.
It was adorable. There's one like behind you.
Yeah. Yeah. Where are we at? I scrolled too far.
Sorry. Talks about Mormon messaging around women.
Oh, yeah. And. And she gets into the how her
most important work is raising a family. And
then she kind of she talks about how life kind
of stopped for her when she was getting divorced
and she started getting emotional. And I thought,
like, I've read the book and everything that
I think this was all much closer together than
I thought, because I was like, oh, she's been
divorced for years at this point. Well, it's
fuzzy because. I do think she's been divorced
or at least separated for years at this point
because the divorce is settled. Like she's not
going through it anymore. And that takes a long
time. Sure. Especially in Utah. Their divorce
laws are very hard to navigate. And did she have
beauty lab while she was still married? I don't
think so. I don't think so. So like she has been
divorced for years. I feel like it does seem
raw, but I feel like she it's less to do with
her ex -husband and more to do with like her
internal feelings that she needs to deal with.
Oh, absolutely. She gets into how in a confessional
she didn't get married for love, but she was
doing what she thought was expected of her. And
we also get into her talking about how she feels
like the expectation was that she stayed married,
even though she was absolutely miserable in her
marriage. And I've seen this play out a million
times. I've seen marriages where people stay
together because they think the church wants
them to or like their family wants them to, whatever
the case may be. And I have seen marriages that
have fallen apart because they thought they were
supposed to stay together. Well, Jen asks her,
she's like, if you could have stayed in your
marriage, even though you were miserable, would
you have? And she was like, yes, without a doubt.
Yes. And that's so it was like the most eye opening
scene for me to see, because she talks about
how unhappy she was and how horrible it was and
how they didn't align on anything. And she still
is saying, if given the opportunity, I would
have stayed in my marriage, which is insane.
And I think she resents a little bit that it
was Billy's choice to leave because they do get
into that eventually where. yeah well it's clear
in this episode to me because she acts like she
would have done anything to stay in that marriage
because that's what the church wants her to do
right which sucks um But Jen was a nightmare
in the first couple of episodes. I think she
did a really, really good job of being supportive
of Heather right here and being like, no, you
need to be a good example for your daughters.
Like you're doing the right thing. And like with
this divorce, I think. Yeah. Jen did the right
thing here. She did say she was like, would you
tell your daughters to do the same thing? And
that's where like Heather had a pause and was
like, no, I wouldn't tell my daughters to be
miserable in a marriage. And I think that really
did kind of like. Open something up for her.
Oh, for sure. We go to Meredith's house where
she's making cocktails. Meredith starts the blender.
And it's this whole trope. They've done it on
every single city of housewives. But she starts
the blender without the top being on. And Chloe
and Brooks come down and they are the opposite
of helpful. Like they are the most unhelpful
children. Brooks is like, Mom, what are you doing?
I do believe obviously Meredith is a good mother
and I'm sure Seth is a good dad, but yeah, those
kids don't know how to clean up anything. No,
because they've had help their whole lives. Like
Meredith has had a housekeeper forever. That's
fine. But like the way Brooks and Chloe were
just like, mom, you made a mess. I also wrote
Meredith, like Meredith will be my my Jesse for
Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, where like
every time they come on screen, I just write.
Meredith has a really beautiful family. Yeah.
Like they're all very pretty. Yeah. Jen shows
up and brings her assistance with her to spend
time with Meredith. She brings Marillo and Crystal
and I. I don't, why does she bring them everywhere?
Why is she always bringing the shot spot around?
I think she thinks it's like a status symbol
to have a staff, which is weird. Okay. Jen gives
us a confessional where she explains that she
and Meredith have very similar situations where
their husbands are constantly away for work.
And then we cut to Jen doing high kicks on the
couch where we find out she's not wearing underwear.
And Brooks goes into a confessional says and
says that he's uncomfortable because Jen's vagina
is in his face. And I feel like. This situation
and we we come you will come to find out that
this situation is blown up over the next two
seasons. Oh, yeah, 100 percent. It doesn't stop.
Do you want to know what I think about it? Tell
me what you think. I think Brooks doesn't like
Jen. OK, I think that's where this all started,
is that Brooks is a little protective of his
mom, which is fine. Sure. And doesn't like. his
mom being friends with jen and he thought this
would be a way to get them to stop being friends
i never even once considered that that's actually
probably a really good point just based on how
everything plays out but i i looked at it from
like if you look at the angles of where brooks
is sitting of where jen is sitting of where like
of where her cut is facing and he she obviously
wasn't trying to flash this little boy right
she mind you they're by the way they're all adults
he's 21 years old yeah but she wasn't trying
to flash him she wasn't trying to flash anybody
he could have just moved to a different spot
if it was really that serious like it if he saw
anything though i feel like just based on the
angles based on everything it was so quick like
he saw her cooch for one second yeah and like
what okay yeah it's not like she hiked up her
skirt or anything like she was just it's not
like he was at a burlesque show with the the
mormon wives hitting a joint out of a vag like
it was wild but it becomes this becomes a major
plot point over the next two seasons and at the
end of this like brooks and chloe leave because
they need to go to best buy to get away from
jen and i was like oh jesus christ like here's
the thing i get it if you're uncomfortable yeah
sure leave but like it felt like a little much
you couldn't just go to your bedroom yeah you
couldn't just you're going best buy well i don't
know the last time i went to a best buy i had
to go for some reason i don't remember what it
was for i don't know We go to Lisa taking Jack
out for a driving lesson. Jack says he has a
strong pull out game as he's packing out of the
driveway. Oh, my God. Just can't stop. Won't
stop. No, I could not get in a car and drive
with Lisa. The passenger seat. There's no fucking
way. Why? Because I know for a fact she'd be
like, do you see that? Do you see that? Do you
see that? Like, it would be like I'm talking
as someone who's had a driver's license for 20
years. No, I feel like she's only like that because
he's learning to drive. But I don't know. You're
telling me she's not like that with John Barlow.
Hundred percent. She's throwing things out the
window with John Barlow. I just I wouldn't be
able to do it. I would love to be in a car with
Lisa. Could not be the driver in a car with Lisa.
No way. And then. I fully forgot Henry was in
the backseat, just like living his little life.
He's just having a time. Mary goes out for dinner
with Meredith, and I feel like these are two
people I would love to have dinner with. No,
I don't like Mary. I really don't like it. No.
OK, you haven't gotten into. Seasons four and
five were like, I shouldn't take four seasons
for me to like someone. It shouldn't. You're
100 percent right. I don't. I get where you're
coming from. And I think I looked at this season
like looking back because, you know, I've watched
I've watched these episodes 4000 times. I looked
at it through the lens of like everything I know
now. Yeah, I. I think Mary would like even even
knowing her just from season one. I think Mary
would be so funny just to sit down and listen
to her talk. She's so funny. I'm just like not
interested in someone who I pretty much know
without a shadow of a doubt. 90 % of the time
she's just not being authentic with me. Okay.
She's putting on a facade. She is getting her
Chanel out of one of her 16 closets. And meeting
me and telling me what I want to hear or being
catty as fuck just depends which Mary you get.
Like, I don't, I just don't like her. That's
fair. And I also feel like she, I'm not going
to sit here and defend religion ever, but she
doesn't act like the first lady of a church either.
I don't disagree with that. She does not take
that seriously, which to me is strange. I agree.
Especially after you inherited that from your
grandma. you would think you would take it more
seriously yeah anyway i also and again me defending
mary i think she is damaged i think that there
is a lot there and i'm not defending her hurt
people hurt people but that doesn't make me like
her that's fair um One thing that Andy Cohen
has talked a lot about is making sure producers
include footage of Real Housewives ordering.
And I love that just in general. I love knowing
what people eat. Oh, 100%. I want to know what
your order is. If anything, I wish they showed
us the whole menu and then showed us what you
ordered. Yes. Because I feel like I would understand
your brain so well. I have on many occasions,
like when they show the shot of like the restaurant,
I will look up their menu. They go to this place
called Walter's. By the way, when we go to Salt
Lake City for a live show one day, we're going
to this place called Walter's. Walter has since
passed. But the restaurant is it's real Italian
food. And I want to go so bad. Mary talks about
how she's been super close to her son, Robert
Jr., for his whole life. And now that he's 17
and dating a girl for the first time, he isn't
hanging around her as much. And she's having
a hard time with that. Which I totally get. Yeah,
I totally get the way she goes about it. I do
not support, but we're not there yet. Yes, I
agree. Meredith gives really good advice, which
was not shocking to me hearing the way she talked.
I was like, oh, she's a very thoughtful individual.
Yeah. And I feel like she like would meet anyone
on the street, like hear a problem, be like,
this is what you need to do. And it would be
the best advice. I feel like she is an empath.
And she also like. isn't afraid to tell you exactly
how it is like she's she will say the hard thing
mary gets into because we we don't hear a lot
about this until like later on but we get into
mary talking about how her marriage has turned
into more of a partnership and her marriage was
arranged and leaving isn't an option i put arranged
in quotations because i I have a lot of questions
about this. Well, here's the thing. It was arranged
for someone. It didn't have to be you, Mary.
You wanted it. You chose this. I... Your mom
could have taken it. Your mom is mad you didn't
let her take it. Okay. That is true. Again, I
feel like Mary is damaged. yeah but aren't we
all sure you poor thing you poor poor thing you
poor millionaire you're gonna have to move to
one of your other closets to cry it out for a
change of scenery I feel so sorry for you um
She she talks about how she has beauty in all
of her mess, and she recognizes that her marriage
is weird, but she did it because she trusted
her grandma. And she shares that she disconnected
from her mom when she was 19 years old because
her mom wanted to take Mama Cosby's spot in the
church. And this is where I start to get super
uncomfortable, because in a confessional, one
of the producers asked, like, did you guys sleep
together on the first night? And she goes, no,
I was on my period. For a month. For 28 days
she was on her period. She says she was on her
period for a month. However, you chose it. And
why is leaving not an option, Mary? Why? I don't
know. And like part of me wonders if... He gets
the money. Well, that. Well, yeah, because it's...
I don't know how that works after you're married
and divorced because like half of the assets
ostensibly would be yours. But... My I have a
lot of questions about like, did she choose this
or was she pushed into this by Robert Sr.? Like,
that's because you think like she didn't step
up. He chose her. Yes, I have a because I'm like,
what? What night? She was she was married. Like
Mary was married before this. What 19 year old
would choose that? Tell me. Like, unless it's
truly for the money. I mean, think about how
many 19 year olds are. Looking for sugar daddies.
It's the same thing. But like, think about like
my grandma, Kathy, Larry's wife. Let's just say
Larry dies and they're sitting, I mean, they're
sitting on not as much money as like my granny
and pap will have, but they're sitting on a pretty
good chunk of money. Like neither one of them
have to work. And let's just say Kathy comes
to me and says, Hey, I'm lonely. Like for me,
I'm like, I wouldn't choose that. No. Do you
know what I mean? Yeah, but who forced her up
on the altar? Well, and that's where I come back
to. Like, I think the religion plays into it
a little bit because I'm like, I truly if you.
She doesn't cite religion as the reason she can't
leave. But at some point they start to talk about
how people used to believe Mama Cosby was God.
And. That's where this church gets into. And
like, I wonder if Mary believes that. I wonder
if Mama Cosby, if she believed, oh, yeah, like
God's telling me to marry this man. I wonder
if this is purely speculation. Yeah, no. And
I do believe he is strange for going along with
this whole arrangement. And I don't think he's
just going along with it. I do believe he's perpetuating
it. Yes. However, Mary is a grown woman. Sure.
Who has chosen not to stand up for herself. And
so at some point you have to turn the weirdness
off. Okay. Like. That's fair. If you're going
to choose to set this example, then set it. Sure.
And I just don't, I don't know. Something about
it just does not sit right with me. The whole
thing is weird to me. And I do have sympathy
for her. I don't like her, but I do have sympathy
for her. Yes. And if for nothing else than to
say like, oh, the entire world is talking about
how fucked up and weird your marriage is. I feel
bad for that. Yes and no, because she did choose
to be on the show and she knew that she was going
to have to talk about it. I just, I don't know.
Part of me wishes she would have just been a
lot more forthright with about everything. The
whole situation from start to finish. I 100 %
agree. Because. No matter how deep it goes, no
matter how fucked up it is, people will understand
if you give them something to understand. Like
people will either side with you or against you
either way. So you should just let it out. And
I think that we get that in season four. I will
tell you that like in season. between seasons
four and five like we start to really understand
who mary is as a person as and more so as a mother
and as i think she's an excellent mom oh you
what i've seen when you get really into it though
like it you find out how good she actually is
Yeah, I can 100 % see that. I haven't seen season
four, but I can 100 % see Mary being an amazing
mom. And I do see that in seasons one and two,
what I've seen. She's a great mom. My problem
is not with her as a mother. It's not with her
as a wife. I don't care how a woman is as a wife.
I'll just say that. It's her as a person. She
comes off like she's always trying to hide something.
I do agree with that. At all times. And people
like that just make me so severely uncomfortable.
Okay. Because I'm very open book. I'll tell anybody
anything. Oh, for sure. And so like people who
just always come off as not being 100 % honest
or like they're hiding something just, I don't
like it. Yeah. That's fair. Yeah. Anyway, Mary
invites Meredith to come to her church. And I
feel like Meredith was really, really supportive.
And like, I, I appreciate this about Meredith
because like, it would be like me being like,
yeah, I'll go to your church. Cause it's not
her religion. It's not anything to do with her,
but I feel like she was really excited to check
out Faith Temple. Yeah. I feel like it's like
every time I've ever been invited to church where
it's like, yeah. As a guest. I will come as a
spectator. Thank you. Yes, that is 100 % the
vibe. We go over to Meredith's house where Meredith
and Brooks are making guacamole. And Brooks gets
into how he took a semester off to support his
mom during the separation. Diva, you wanted to
be on the show, girl. They talked about it in
the first episode, too. I don't know why he brings
it back up. Like, OK. OK, girl. They unpack how
Brooks and Chloe were uncomfortable with Jen.
her cooch being out and then he starts getting
annoying about the high kicks like I if okay
here's where I fall on this issue he could have
just said to his mom hey the whole thing was
weird and it made me uncomfortable more than
that I think I think he needs to come to his
mom and be like I don't like her I don't like
being around her and I live here too but if it's
for the cameras just say Yeah. That her cut being
out made me uncomfortable. He went on and on
and on and on and on. And then he turned it into
you're the CEO of Meredith Marks Brands. You
don't have time for this. And I was like, oh,
I don't like this because now you're trying to
say like who your mom can and can't hang out
with. Which is weird. Right. It would be so much
easier to just say. Hey, Jen makes me uncomfortable
and I live here too. Right. Can she not come
over? Yeah. And I feel like Meredith as a mother
would 100 % be like, okay, yeah, I don't want
to put you in a situation. Well, that's ultimately
where she ended up, but it was just like him
pushing and pushing and pushing and pushing.
Yeah. And then Jen was supposed to come over
for a sleepover and Brooks decides that simply
isn't going to happen. So Meredith has to text
her and cancel, which becomes. a whole thing
yeah i would think this is this was surprising
to me because i genuinely thought jen would try
to see it from like her son's perspective oh
no and like i genuinely thought that she would
be like oh okay and be like if anything like
a little embarrassed about it that's that's not
what jen was told though jen was told oh chloe's
gonna be home for the weekend yeah no that's
no because but also at the same time when jen
found out about this and this is we get into
this at the beginning of season two but spoiler
we find out that jen starts retweeting not retweeting
i'm sorry she starts liking homophobic contents
about her uh homophobic tweets about brooks and
yeah and all of this and he hasn't come out at
this point on the show wow I'll let you take
that one. I will say it was assumed. But that's
not fair. No one should be outed by assumption.
Absolutely. However. Okay. With that being said.
Okay, baby. Yeah. Whatever you need. But he does
talk about it in season two and he's like. I
never got to like have that be my news. And that
makes me sad. Sure. I don't ever want to see
someone be outed against their will. Right. 100
percent. But so it's never this was never about.
Until Jen saw it on the on the show, we never
knew why she was being uninvited. Yeah. Right.
So. We go over to Mary's house. Mary and Robert
Senior are talking about finding a new school
for Robert Junior because he's not learning anything
where he's at. And he's literally 17 years old.
So he's he's a junior in high school, at least.
Right. Well, it's not about the school. Well,
obviously, it's about his little girlfriend.
Well, it's we you will come to find out more
later that it's not just this like this. This
is season five. I think you figure out what it's
really about. Well, I remember. Not long after
this, Mary starts talking about how she doesn't
like his little girlfriend. Well, no, she's talking
about it at dinner with Meredith. You're you're
going to really find out why, though. It's bad.
Oh, OK. So but that's the thing is, like, I don't
like this whole conversation. Like, oh, let's
move. I agree with you. It's 100 percent about
the girlfriend, because I don't think they knew
the depth of what was going on here at this point.
That being said. It is a weird time. Like, why
would you be like, yeah, I know you've been at
this school your whole life and you're going
to graduate next year. But how about we move
you to a boarding school? Can you imagine? No.
We get a confessional from Mary about how. Oh,
Jesus Christ. She had to she had to get to know
Robert Senior after they got married and how
if she had to pick a guy, this is the guy that
she would pick. And after Mary had Robert Junior,
Mary. drifted into being a mom and Robert Sr.
drifted into being Robert Sr. I think it's an
age thing with that, to be fair. Like he had
done the song and dance of being at least a stepdad
when he was with her grandma. And so it's like
he's not he's not in a stage of his life where
like he wants to take care of a baby. And that's
just where we're at. Yeah. But Robert Jr. comes
down and Mary tries to convince him that he should
go to the sporting school in Los Angeles. And
I forgot that I wrote this. If if Robert Sr.
is Mary's step grandfather, does that make Robert
Jr. Does that make him Robert Jr.'s great grandfather
and his dad? Or like, I don't understand how
that works. Step great grandpa and also dad.
I don't know. That's a lot to unpack. I don't
know what to do with that. Yeah, me neither.
I might cut that, too. I'm calling the police.
We I don't know what that is. We go over to.
I'm sorry, Mary's church and Whitney, Whitney's
dad and Meredith are all showing up for the service.
When he thought it would be a good idea to bring
her dad to church because he's recovering from
addiction. I go back and forth on this because
like, yeah, it's a great place to find community.
I don't like how predatory religion can be with
people that are addicts. Yes. But I also like
have firsthand seen someone who was addicted.
finding the church and that like pulling them
out of addiction which is amazing i love that
if you need that then i want you to have it sure
100 and that's where i'm like it's a case -by
-case basis for me like i don't like churches
finding these people i like people finding the
church that's where i'm at with it right for
sure um mary's Church is a lot like the Nazarene
tent revivals that I used to go to as a little
kid. There's people crying and jumping around.
It's a lot. People are getting up and speaking
in tongues. It's a lot. Yeah. And it's a lot
of yelling. To me, it looks like emotional manipulation.
But I've never been to a church like that. And
I don't want to yuck someone's yum. If that's
how you worship your God, then by all means.
To me, it just seems like you're getting people
worked up on purpose so that they will feel something.
One day we're going to get into cry nights at
church camp. Oh, I've been through that, actually.
I went to a church camp, a sleepaway camp one
time. They did not. They did not appreciate me
at camp, whatever it was called. I'm not going
to dox them. They didn't like me. Actually, one
anecdote from that trip that I remember so vividly
is we were sitting like on the Wabash River and
we were supposed to be like reading our Bibles
or something. And it was dead silent. And all
of a sudden, my dumb ass just chimes in and goes,
what's the difference between this and Catholicism?
Oh, they did not like that. They didn't like
it at all. Anyway, moving on. Yeah, they're at
the church. It's a lot. It's a lot. Mary gets
down to the congregation and goes over and starts
praying over Whitney's dad and then just starts
screaming, heal, heal. Yes, ma 'am. And I have
seen this in real life. I have seen this happen.
We're like. I I've seen, I've seen it go one
of two ways, either like the person just starts
crying, falls on their knees and like whatever,
or the person like throws themselves on the ground,
starts shaking and like, and the demons are released.
Like I, I am telling you it is wild to see in
real life. Cause I'm just like, I can't even
imagine. I will tell you my uncle Kirby has talked
very, very. Frankly, about like, yeah, when I
was a little kid and like we because Dad Bolin
used to take them to these church revivals. Dad
Bolin took us to one of these revivals and they
brought me up on the stage and they did this.
And I just started speaking in tongues because
I thought I was supposed to. Yeah, I have been
to one church where I know that they acted like
that from third party stories. But like when
I went. I was with like the pastor's son and
some other friends. And so we just like played
basketball. And I am so glad I wasn't in that
congregation because I know I would just like
look confused. And that's not the energy you're
supposed to get. You were supposed to be crying.
Right. And I can't. My face is very readable.
There's no lying. But all of my feelings about
religion aside, you saw. the reaction that Whitney's
dad had to it where he just starts crying. Yeah.
And I was like, that is beautiful because like
he felt like, and this is what I do feel about
Mary as a pastor where she makes people feel
love. And I think that like, granted that can
be used for manipulation. I won't take that away
from anyone, but I feel like Mary does turn that
on. and yeah he needed that in this moment he
felt seen and supported in that moment and i
do feel like there's something to be said for
as ironic as it is but for an addict going somewhere
and not just being immediately judged and looked
down upon but instead people like genuinely wanting
to help you yeah Even if sometimes their motives
aren't the best, like they're just trying to
prove something. It's still like she genuinely
wanted him to heal in that moment. Yeah. Instead
of being like, oh, you little crackhead. You
know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. We head over to
Jen's house where the Shaw squad is helping her
plan or look for the party for. I don't know
if this is for the baby shower for for Whitney's
party. But there are literally six people there,
and she says that they all work for her every
single day. How much is she paying these people,
or do you think she's paying them? We've already
brought this up. I don't know. I go back and
forth on it. I don't think that they're making
a livable wage, but also she was funneling in
a lot of money. That's true. I don't know. I
like I know some of them came to live with her
at one point. Like, I mean, she's got this massive
chalet. So maybe that like she's just like, oh,
here you work for me. You get a place to live
and like food. I don't know. Like, I watched
a Netflix show that was like that. I can't. Oh,
sirens. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We're like a live in
assistant. But that was just one girl. Like,
I can't imagine six people living in your house.
Also. Two of the people had their faces blurred
out and like part of me wonders like because
they wouldn't say they will. They wouldn't sign
the release. But like part of me wonders is like,
did they know what was to come this early on?
Well, I just wonder because Jen is awful to these
people. I wonder what the turnover rate was like,
like if they were done working for her before
the season was even done filming. Maybe. Yeah.
Oh, God. We at some point I want to watch this.
We'll probably watch this after season two, but
like the the Hulu documentary about like what
was going on, because like you get into like
her screaming at one of the assistants and like,
yeah, I wonder like how often that was actually
going on. Well, yeah, I don't I feel like she
can't be paying these people a ton of money and
she's so mean to them. Like you got to get people
who are only there for a couple of months before
they throw in the towel. I part of me wonders
if Jen is someone who gay guys absolutely live
for, like gay guys love a fabulous woman who
is larger than life. And that is Jennifer Shaw.
And I wonder if she like. use that to her advantage
yeah I wonder if she's like oh come with mama
shot and like I wonder if she was like better
to the gay guys than she was to like Stu or whoever
I don't know I don't know that was her right
hand man and she was so mean to him oh well she
got what she had coming if she was ever mean
to him like because we find out like you'll see
when the arrest happens but you'll find out that
like He sold her out like you would not believe.
And I believe that maybe he would have gone lighter
on her if not for the way she treated him. I
don't know. I love Jen Shaw, but that's one thing
I cannot get past. Once you have a working relationship
with her, she is mean. Just mean. We go over
to Beauty Lab for the baby shower and everyone
shows up and the party actually looks really
fun. And I feel like it was very cute. And I
feel like Heather, if she is. I say this. She's
good at everything. Like, everything we've seen
her do, she's good at. Yeah, pretty much. I feel
like she is probably one of the best party planners.
It's like, yeah, my mom putting on a party. Like,
I feel like she was always the mom in the neighborhood
where everyone wanted to be invited to her birthday
parties. I feel like she's just very thoughtful.
And she's, like, a very generous lady. Because,
like, she had to have a pretty nice divorce settlement.
And she's making money off of Beauty Lab. Billie's
still taking care of her, too, at this point.
yeah and so like she's not sparing a dime on
anything either right which is yeah and so like
you get all of those factors together and yeah
she's amazing um heather gives us a confessional
where she says that she that everything going
on going on in her life has made her reevaluate
things and she's decided that she wants to be
supportive to her daughters figuring out what
they believe on their own and for a person who
is as religious as heather was yeah that is Huge.
Right. And this is something that like I'm actually
like it made me think a lot about Huck and like
how Huck is my dad, dear listener. But like where
he came to where he said, I cannot push my kids
into the Nazarene church because of like how
damaging I know it can be. And he let me and
Zachary figure out what we believed in on our
own. And I like that's impressive as hell. Well,
both of my parents were. catholic growing up
and they both like were so tired of feeling guilty
and evil all the time that they both stepped
away from the church and so that's how i grew
up too they were like we're not gonna judge you
for whatever you pick if you pick anything but
like you gotta figure it out on your own because
we don't know what's going on but i think that's
how it should be like i think like if you force
a kid to go to church it's like they're only
perpetuating like whatever i think i don't know
like it's hard because some people do have like
a really good relationship with the church and
so i get i also understand the viewpoint of like
wanting to share that with your children and
like have it be a part of your life and routine
sure So that's hard. And it's also hard, like,
if you're going to church every Sunday and you
want to be that person, I want you to be that
person. And so it's like, when you have kids,
I don't think you should stop that necessarily.
But that's hard. It's hard. For a non -religious
person, it's very easy for me to look at Jack
and be like, I'm happy with whatever you want
to choose. I'm the same way. But if I were going
to church every week. It's not that I would be
like, this is what you must believe. And I need
you to fall into this wholeheartedly. But like,
I would take him with me every week. Sure. But
like, I don't know. We'll get into it one day.
Like, but it's. I don't like being told this
is what you believe. That's what I think. And
that's what I was told my whole life by my grandparents.
Yeah. And like by my dad to a certain degree.
And then one day he was just like, actually,
no, we're not doing that anymore. But I do think
Heather is very admirable. It is like she really
broke through the level of I don't want to say
brainwashing, but that's really the only word
I have. She really like broke through that with
the LDS and they were like and was like, I just
want my daughters to be happy. Yeah. And I really
respect that. I do, too. Heather, Whitney and
Jen break off on their own. And Jen asks if Mary's
going to be at Whitney's party. And Whitney's
like, I like Mary. Like, what's the problem?
Like, and then Mary or Jen says that Mary's irrelevant
and then proceeds to go on. about how Mary attacked
her family. And I'm just like, can we, for the
love of God, like, can we please let the hospital
smell comment go? Like, can we please, please?
Like, is it the most horrendous thing that anyone
has ever said to anyone? Because we're going
to get into some of the shit that Jen Shaw said.
Right. Well, that's the thing is coming from
Jen. Like if it were Heather, who would never
hurt a fly. You know, she can be a little messy,
but she's not saying mean shit left and right.
Right. And you, like, sort of came for her instead
of snide comment. I would understand her demanding
an apology more than I understand Jen Shaw demanding
an apology. Right. I don't understand. When are
you going to apologize for everything you've
said? Well. Then we get into Jen saying that
she's not OK with Meredith being friends with
Mary and going to Mary's church because that's
a personal dig against her. And she she says
you can't be friends with her and be friends
with me. I'm not saying to choose. Just tell
me. Tell you what? If you're not telling me to
choose, if you're not if you're telling me not
to choose, then what do I need to tell you? But
like at the same time. I don't like this. Like,
here's the thing. You know where I stand on being
friends with people that you don't fuck with.
I'm not going to I'm not going to be friends
with someone who has been rotten as hell to you.
That being said, I will never, ever, ever tell
someone who to be friends with. Right. And you
just have to like you just have to have your
own friendships with people. And that just has
to be OK. Yeah, like, let the... I don't know.
And, like, if you're really that serious, Jen,
watch their actions and decide for yourself.
You say, I'm not okay with being friends with
Meredith if she's friends with Mary. And then
when you watch her be friends with Mary, you
have to stop being friends with Meredith. But
at the same time... I'm telling you right now,
if anyone on God's green earth is capable of
being friends with someone and like separating
their feelings about another person from a friendship,
it is Meredith Marks. Well, yeah, but I'm just
saying I don't think Jen is even Jen is looking
for a compliment here. She's like digging for
a compliment is the way I see it. Yes, because
she's like asking if you would ever choose her
over Mary. It's an honor to be in Jen's circle.
Christ. OK, so then we head over to the to the
Roaring Twenties party. I know earlier I said
I hate a theme, but like I I think the party
itself seemed fun. Yeah. I didn't like the whole
entrance situation. I don't. That's I agree.
That's the thing that I can't deal with. I didn't
like the like you have to walk into a gift shop
and tell them you're there for a party and then
they open the secret door and like. The more
and more I think about it, I think that's the
whole kitsch of it. It's like, oh, the gift shop
doesn't actually sell anything. Yeah. Like, it's
there for the bar. No, I get it. It's just like,
they're just such completely different vibes.
It was, I don't know. Right. But then you go
in, and I couldn't stand the voice Whitney was
putting on. The whole, hey. Like, she was trying
to be Marilyn Monroe. Yeah. Like, I couldn't
stand it. Well. I just wanted to make sure that
wasn't going to fall out. That's fine. When he's
doing a voice, it's okay. It's a lot. There's
a stripper cowboy, and I was not mad about him.
Yeah. And then... But, like, why are they there,
the male strippers? I don't understand. I wasn't
sure how it fit into the theme, yeah. I don't
think they were all strippers. I think some of
them were just... Dancers, whatever. Yeah, but
they were all naked, and I didn't under... Whatever.
Sure, Whitney. Whatever you want. Yeah. So then
Jen shows up late as always and sees Meredith
talking to Mary and feels very attacked by this.
Then be attacked. I don't know what to tell you,
Jen. I really don't know. I don't know. And that's
that's where we leave off with episode three,
dear listener. Yeah. Do we call it there? I think
so. We're at an hour and 45 minutes. So, yeah,
we had a lot today. Dear listener, thank you
for listening. Thank you for being here. We love
you. From Indy to Belgium, I think was one of
them on the list. We love you. Thank you for
being here. Share us with your messiest friend.
See you next time. Bye.