WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.799 Are you feeling lost? Well, you've come to the 00:00:02.799 --> 00:00:05.200 right place. Welcome to Lost -ish, where we, 00:00:05.259 --> 00:00:07.459 Rose Chachko, and Emmanuella Kathreptakis, 00:00:07.660 --> 00:00:10.279 share what it's really like navigating your 20s. 00:00:10.359 --> 00:00:12.880 We're two semi -lost girls figuring out careers, 00:00:13.300 --> 00:00:15.779 relationships, wellness, purpose, and everything 00:00:15.779 --> 00:00:18.120 in between. Each week we dive into the highs, 00:00:18.239 --> 00:00:20.579 the lows, and lessons of chasing your dreams, 00:00:20.800 --> 00:00:23.019 finding happiness, and learning to embrace the 00:00:23.019 --> 00:00:25.160 uncertainty. We're not here to pretend like we've 00:00:25.160 --> 00:00:27.719 loaded all together. We're simply just figuring 00:00:27.719 --> 00:00:31.100 it out with you. Hello, guys. Hello, guys. Welcome 00:00:31.100 --> 00:00:36.539 back to the Lostish podcast. We are very excited 00:00:36.539 --> 00:00:39.539 to be bringing back another episode for all of 00:00:39.539 --> 00:00:43.280 you about tall poppy syndrome. So this is something 00:00:43.280 --> 00:00:45.539 that I wasn't very familiar with. Rose actually 00:00:45.539 --> 00:00:48.539 introduced me to this concept, but basically 00:00:48.539 --> 00:00:50.759 it's a concept where to put it in very simple 00:00:50.759 --> 00:00:53.420 terms or how it was explained to me is pretty 00:00:53.420 --> 00:00:57.700 much, you know, you hear a success story and 00:00:57.700 --> 00:01:00.609 then hating on someone just because they are 00:01:00.609 --> 00:01:03.189 successful. And that doesn't just mean famous. 00:01:03.850 --> 00:01:07.099 It means Good at extremely good at something 00:01:07.099 --> 00:01:10.319 like a high achiever or like even a colleague 00:01:10.319 --> 00:01:14.140 at work who's been promoted or it actually happens 00:01:14.140 --> 00:01:16.840 a lot within the performing arts industry which 00:01:16.840 --> 00:01:20.420 is the industry that I am in and in the acting 00:01:20.420 --> 00:01:22.859 industry oh my goodness like tall poppy syndrome 00:01:22.859 --> 00:01:27.079 is so real especially in Australia because I 00:01:27.079 --> 00:01:30.719 feel like in the US. People successes are like 00:01:30.719 --> 00:01:33.780 really celebrated and they kind of come like 00:01:33.780 --> 00:01:36.780 a lot of americans come with this like confidence 00:01:36.780 --> 00:01:39.780 of owning their owning their sheet really owning 00:01:39.780 --> 00:01:43.379 their space owning their success but he would 00:01:43.379 --> 00:01:47.340 kind of brought up to be. You know very very 00:01:47.340 --> 00:01:51.700 humbled obviously that doesn't reflect everybody 00:01:51.700 --> 00:01:57.659 or you know a lot of people. can be very egotistical 00:01:57.659 --> 00:02:00.519 and arrogant about their successes but a lot 00:02:00.519 --> 00:02:03.920 of Australians are brought up to be quite humbled 00:02:03.920 --> 00:02:06.900 and that's not to say Americans aren't humble 00:02:06.900 --> 00:02:10.939 you know but there's a difference in somebody 00:02:10.939 --> 00:02:13.439 being successful and somebody envying somebody. 00:02:13.759 --> 00:02:15.860 And yeah we're not specifically pointing out 00:02:15.860 --> 00:02:19.180 one specific culture that was just like an interesting 00:02:19.180 --> 00:02:22.000 statistic that we had found yes but we're pretty 00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:23.520 much in this episode going to talk about what 00:02:23.520 --> 00:02:27.080 it is. where you can find these issues in all, 00:02:27.080 --> 00:02:29.759 where you can encounter situations like this 00:02:29.759 --> 00:02:31.960 throughout all your twenties and even younger, 00:02:32.039 --> 00:02:33.919 even older, pretty much throughout your whole 00:02:33.919 --> 00:02:36.560 life. And then how to conquer it. Yes. Yeah. 00:02:36.659 --> 00:02:39.000 Like our tips of the stories that we've encountered 00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:44.879 and what we're doing to try and avoid that. So 00:02:44.879 --> 00:02:47.659 let's just get right into it. So we've got some 00:02:47.659 --> 00:02:49.580 talking points once again, so we kind of stay 00:02:49.580 --> 00:02:53.080 on track. And I think Emanuela gave a really 00:02:53.520 --> 00:02:57.039 Really simple great definition of what tall poppy 00:02:57.039 --> 00:03:01.819 syndrome is but according to chat gbt defining 00:03:01.819 --> 00:03:06.379 tall poppy syndrome is the origin term of. It 00:03:06.379 --> 00:03:09.439 comes from the idea of cutting down poppies that 00:03:09.439 --> 00:03:12.599 grow taller than the rest so it's about obviously 00:03:12.599 --> 00:03:14.860 resentment or criticism towards people who are 00:03:14.860 --> 00:03:18.580 perceived as too successful or getting ahead. 00:03:20.039 --> 00:03:22.139 And there's a bit of a tension there between 00:03:22.139 --> 00:03:25.479 I guess mateship and ambition because a lot of 00:03:25.479 --> 00:03:29.039 times it can happen between friends too like. 00:03:29.449 --> 00:03:32.729 As an actor myself who has been in the industry 00:03:32.729 --> 00:03:36.330 for a while now the the amount of times like 00:03:36.330 --> 00:03:38.909 you have people putting you down for your successes 00:03:38.909 --> 00:03:42.830 people who you think are your friends which is 00:03:42.830 --> 00:03:45.689 baffling to me and we've we've touched on like 00:03:45.689 --> 00:03:48.409 this sort of jealousy and how to deal with people 00:03:48.409 --> 00:03:50.830 like this in your circle in two episodes now 00:03:50.830 --> 00:03:55.789 last one and also in our importance of your circle 00:03:55.789 --> 00:03:58.860 episode so. It's not just something that relates 00:03:58.860 --> 00:04:00.800 at all poppy syndrome but something again it 00:04:00.800 --> 00:04:02.919 just goes to show how much you really can encounter 00:04:02.919 --> 00:04:05.400 and how common it is to encounter situations 00:04:05.400 --> 00:04:08.539 like this i think i'll just add on to that and 00:04:08.539 --> 00:04:11.159 say that that's probably my biggest tip is that. 00:04:11.479 --> 00:04:14.800 Whether you want to see it or not i think people 00:04:14.800 --> 00:04:17.459 always have an idea of the types of people that 00:04:17.459 --> 00:04:19.079 are good for them in their lives and the ones 00:04:19.079 --> 00:04:21.120 that aren't whether you consider them your good 00:04:21.120 --> 00:04:23.660 friends or not i think there's always those red 00:04:23.660 --> 00:04:26.360 flags that you choose to oversee and sometimes 00:04:26.360 --> 00:04:29.819 even see them and choose to ignore them so for 00:04:29.819 --> 00:04:32.019 me one of the biggest things the biggest you 00:04:32.019 --> 00:04:36.389 know help that i found in my life to avoid. jealousy 00:04:36.389 --> 00:04:39.050 and friends that you know are envious or jealous 00:04:39.050 --> 00:04:42.689 of me for absolutely no reason because I've encountered 00:04:42.689 --> 00:04:45.290 that before and not even for anything serious 00:04:45.290 --> 00:04:47.310 like we're talking about the grades I got in 00:04:47.310 --> 00:04:50.829 school yeah or like like something is you know 00:04:50.829 --> 00:04:54.589 stupid as that which I don't even go around parading. 00:04:55.180 --> 00:04:58.220 Is just making sure that I'm keeping those people 00:04:58.220 --> 00:05:01.379 that I genuinely know deep deep down because 00:05:01.379 --> 00:05:03.319 you always know deep down who's good for you 00:05:03.319 --> 00:05:05.779 and who isn't keeping them the closest to me. 00:05:06.399 --> 00:05:08.319 Because that's what's gonna uplift me the most 00:05:08.319 --> 00:05:09.779 they're the people that are gonna support me 00:05:09.779 --> 00:05:12.600 the most I know I won't ever feel judge bringing 00:05:12.600 --> 00:05:16.720 my successes forward to them and it like it honestly 00:05:16.720 --> 00:05:20.920 makes you thrive. I think honestly like on that 00:05:20.920 --> 00:05:23.480 night when it comes to sort of that. tall poppy 00:05:23.480 --> 00:05:25.540 syndrome within friendships and overachieving 00:05:25.540 --> 00:05:27.740 and schools and universities and things like 00:05:27.740 --> 00:05:31.939 that like I feel like if I succeed, like you 00:05:31.939 --> 00:05:34.639 are one of my biggest fans when it comes to my, 00:05:34.639 --> 00:05:37.339 my acting, right? I really am. She really is. 00:05:37.379 --> 00:05:40.060 And like, I feel like it's also nice having you 00:05:40.060 --> 00:05:42.800 not in the industry because I feel like even 00:05:42.800 --> 00:05:44.779 some of my friends who are in the industry, it's 00:05:44.779 --> 00:05:46.600 very hard to be like, Oh my God, guess what? 00:05:46.620 --> 00:05:49.180 Like I got a call back for this role or I got 00:05:49.180 --> 00:05:51.699 cast for this role because you're all going for 00:05:51.699 --> 00:05:55.019 it. And because you've got it, they're like, 00:05:55.600 --> 00:05:58.420 Oh, like I'm so happy for you. But deep down, 00:05:58.649 --> 00:06:01.670 They wish that they got that role you know what 00:06:01.670 --> 00:06:03.769 i mean and that's okay that's normal but with 00:06:03.769 --> 00:06:06.410 you i feel like you're just happy for me because 00:06:06.410 --> 00:06:09.670 you see that i'm happy and i've succeeded in 00:06:09.670 --> 00:06:11.370 something that i'm really passionate about i 00:06:11.370 --> 00:06:14.009 don't think anything good comes out of being 00:06:14.009 --> 00:06:16.689 jealous for someone else's success honestly the 00:06:16.689 --> 00:06:18.769 more you just let what is supposed to happen 00:06:18.769 --> 00:06:22.209 happen it was meant for that person. Not necessarily 00:06:22.209 --> 00:06:24.470 for you in terms of like the acting thing for 00:06:24.470 --> 00:06:28.319 example but like. The more you you know this 00:06:28.319 --> 00:06:30.000 is something that we used to do in school actually 00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:31.660 me and my high school friends just now that i'm 00:06:31.660 --> 00:06:33.699 on the topic of the like high school grades and 00:06:33.699 --> 00:06:35.720 stuff like that we used to honestly have really 00:06:35.720 --> 00:06:37.379 healthy competition with stuff like this i think 00:06:37.379 --> 00:06:39.899 this is why i did so well in school and this 00:06:39.899 --> 00:06:43.399 was before any of these a i generated things 00:06:43.399 --> 00:06:46.579 out and i still ended up doing very well and 00:06:46.579 --> 00:06:48.379 i think it purely came down to the fact that 00:06:48.379 --> 00:06:51.199 my entire friend group of literally seven people 00:06:51.199 --> 00:06:54.290 was all like. It was healthy competition. Come 00:06:54.290 --> 00:06:56.189 over and study with me. Come and I'll help you 00:06:56.189 --> 00:06:58.129 out. It was like there was none of this like, 00:06:58.410 --> 00:07:00.329 oh, look what I did. Look what I didn't. I'm 00:07:00.329 --> 00:07:02.490 not sharing my essay with you. I'm not doing 00:07:02.490 --> 00:07:05.439 this. Yeah, I didn't have that. Sorry but yeah 00:07:05.439 --> 00:07:07.360 everyone is supposed to be a world where people 00:07:07.360 --> 00:07:10.040 help each other out. Well it is but unfortunately 00:07:10.040 --> 00:07:14.360 that's not what society is right. Well in school 00:07:14.360 --> 00:07:17.220 I didn't experience that at all everybody like 00:07:17.220 --> 00:07:20.319 sharing notes was like this big thing of like 00:07:20.319 --> 00:07:22.879 no like I made the effort I'm not going to share 00:07:22.879 --> 00:07:26.560 my notes or like it's it's honestly just so insane 00:07:26.560 --> 00:07:30.220 to me but also I want to I think we should reiterate 00:07:30.220 --> 00:07:34.000 where. tall poppy syndrome can occur, like in 00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:38.540 what sort of environments. I think the biggest 00:07:38.540 --> 00:07:41.480 environments where tall poppy syndrome can occur 00:07:41.480 --> 00:07:48.160 is media and celebrities. I feel like we hate 00:07:48.160 --> 00:07:52.800 on Successful celebrities so much because they 00:07:52.800 --> 00:07:55.879 are celebrities and they are successful. Hence 00:07:55.879 --> 00:07:59.420 why they're famous and we don't even know them. 00:07:59.939 --> 00:08:02.139 And I'm a culprit of that. I'm like, Oh, you 00:08:02.139 --> 00:08:06.100 know, like, uh, whoever, whoever it is, is annoying. 00:08:06.100 --> 00:08:08.300 And like, Oh my God, like, I don't like this 00:08:08.300 --> 00:08:11.279 celebrity. I don't even know who they are. Little, 00:08:11.579 --> 00:08:13.420 like little do I know. Maybe they're the nicest 00:08:13.420 --> 00:08:17.560 person. ever and we could be best friends. Yeah. 00:08:17.740 --> 00:08:20.060 I never understood what encouraged people to 00:08:20.060 --> 00:08:23.000 sit there and, you know, comment all these bad 00:08:23.000 --> 00:08:26.160 things on people's accounts. And it is just something 00:08:26.160 --> 00:08:29.180 like hate comments. And when you don't, you really 00:08:29.180 --> 00:08:30.819 don't know this person. Like, honestly, I'm saying 00:08:30.819 --> 00:08:33.720 this with my whole heart. I have never once there 00:08:33.720 --> 00:08:36.580 I've seen videos and statements and things that 00:08:36.580 --> 00:08:39.559 people have put out anyone from, you know, a 00:08:39.559 --> 00:08:43.750 political figure to the smallest micro influencer 00:08:43.750 --> 00:08:48.549 to friends. I will never ever not once has it 00:08:48.549 --> 00:08:51.070 crossed my mind even to something that has annoyed 00:08:51.070 --> 00:08:55.289 me so much to be like, to sit there and leave 00:08:55.289 --> 00:08:57.149 such a hateful comment on it. Like these people 00:08:57.149 --> 00:09:00.049 are still people that have feelings. Yeah, never 00:09:00.049 --> 00:09:02.549 like and you don't know them from a bar of soap. 00:09:02.750 --> 00:09:06.519 You shouldn't even Talk hate like hatefully to 00:09:06.519 --> 00:09:09.299 someone that you do know like a friend that you 00:09:09.299 --> 00:09:11.620 have absolutely no idea about. Yes. So that was 00:09:11.620 --> 00:09:14.080 just something that I thought. No, that's such 00:09:14.080 --> 00:09:15.879 a good point. Such a good point. I literally 00:09:15.879 --> 00:09:17.659 never have. I thought, no, I'm going to sit there 00:09:17.659 --> 00:09:19.080 and comment this on this person because they've 00:09:19.080 --> 00:09:21.590 just infuriated me. Well, yeah. I can control 00:09:21.590 --> 00:09:24.070 my emotions, I can control my own beliefs, and 00:09:24.070 --> 00:09:26.049 I'm happy to share them if I do, and I'm happy 00:09:26.049 --> 00:09:28.450 to share them if I don't, but not sit there and 00:09:28.450 --> 00:09:30.269 comment hateful things to someone that is literally 00:09:30.269 --> 00:09:32.309 a human just like you and has feelings just like 00:09:32.309 --> 00:09:34.330 you. On that note, guys, we actually received 00:09:34.330 --> 00:09:38.450 our first hate comment the other day. We did, 00:09:38.610 --> 00:09:40.870 guys, and you know what the irony of it was? 00:09:41.169 --> 00:09:43.110 Rose didn't even see this. I didn't even see 00:09:43.110 --> 00:09:45.210 it. I saw it as a filtered comment that came 00:09:45.210 --> 00:09:48.129 up on our TikTok page of someone being like... 00:09:48.379 --> 00:09:51.740 holy shit, not another brain dead podcast. And 00:09:51.740 --> 00:09:53.960 this person had no profile picture and their 00:09:53.960 --> 00:09:57.799 username was user2576852. And I was like, well, 00:09:57.840 --> 00:10:00.759 of course it was you. Of course it was you hiding 00:10:00.759 --> 00:10:03.240 behind a screen. Like the fact that you even 00:10:03.240 --> 00:10:05.919 like, to be honest, you gave us a view. So thank 00:10:05.919 --> 00:10:08.659 you. Like you viewed our TikTok, that gives us 00:10:08.659 --> 00:10:10.980 a view. We were laughing about it. It was so 00:10:10.980 --> 00:10:13.879 funny. So we've got media and celebs. We also 00:10:13.879 --> 00:10:16.080 obviously have school and universities, like 00:10:16.080 --> 00:10:20.080 we said. Wow tall poppy syndrome in drama school 00:10:20.080 --> 00:10:23.659 is insane awesome story i'll give you a story 00:10:23.659 --> 00:10:29.899 like for example. I had is actually a really 00:10:29.899 --> 00:10:34.740 good friend of mine this person was. I think 00:10:34.740 --> 00:10:37.220 i need a word this really carefully not you know 00:10:37.220 --> 00:10:39.519 like in drama school you have a hierarchy of 00:10:39.519 --> 00:10:41.519 people where teachers alike have their favorites 00:10:41.519 --> 00:10:42.980 and they're like oh yeah you're gonna get the 00:10:42.980 --> 00:10:44.840 best agent or you're gonna succeed or you're 00:10:44.840 --> 00:10:46.980 gonna become famous or whatever whatever sounds 00:10:46.980 --> 00:10:50.460 toxic yeah it was super toxic super toxic um 00:10:50.460 --> 00:10:56.860 and uh this one person who nobody thought um 00:10:56.860 --> 00:11:00.559 would kind of succeed the way that they succeeded 00:11:00.559 --> 00:11:03.639 after drama school and they probably became the 00:11:03.639 --> 00:11:05.879 most successful person in that course i think 00:11:05.879 --> 00:11:08.419 you know who i am talking about. I'm in that 00:11:08.419 --> 00:11:10.299 person will know that talking about as well love 00:11:10.299 --> 00:11:12.899 you very much very proud of all your successes. 00:11:14.639 --> 00:11:17.059 No one thought that this person or the teachers 00:11:17.059 --> 00:11:19.019 actually never really thought that this person 00:11:19.019 --> 00:11:22.399 would be where they are today and this person 00:11:22.399 --> 00:11:26.559 is very well known very famous one of my. very 00:11:26.559 --> 00:11:30.159 good friends. And the fact that he's succeeding 00:11:30.159 --> 00:11:34.639 now, people are not liking that. Of course, people 00:11:34.639 --> 00:11:38.159 have started to kind of hate on this person because 00:11:38.159 --> 00:11:41.340 they're succeeding. It's such a shame. It's such 00:11:41.340 --> 00:11:43.259 a shame. It's such a beautiful place to be like 00:11:43.259 --> 00:11:45.639 you've gotten there and all you want is like 00:11:45.639 --> 00:11:48.620 that's all you know, this person's probably wanted 00:11:48.620 --> 00:11:52.059 their whole life. And then to get to the top 00:11:52.059 --> 00:11:55.039 and have No one sitting this and not no one because 00:11:55.039 --> 00:11:56.899 obviously there are people but then you've got 00:11:56.899 --> 00:11:59.019 that other side of things where this person is 00:11:59.019 --> 00:12:01.200 experiencing a lot of people like sliding back 00:12:01.200 --> 00:12:03.440 into the DMS and being like oh my god you're 00:12:03.440 --> 00:12:06.080 succeeding so much like congratulations like 00:12:06.080 --> 00:12:08.279 let's grab a coffee like you absolute legend. 00:12:08.669 --> 00:12:13.870 Uh, no. F off because you were never a part of 00:12:13.870 --> 00:12:17.110 that person's life in any good way. You know, 00:12:17.549 --> 00:12:20.509 you didn't believe in, in them. You were not 00:12:20.509 --> 00:12:22.389 there through the highs and lows and all of a 00:12:22.389 --> 00:12:23.730 sudden you want to be their friend now because 00:12:23.730 --> 00:12:27.669 they've got clout, you know, but deep down you 00:12:27.669 --> 00:12:30.730 don't, you envy that person for their successes. 00:12:31.230 --> 00:12:35.789 You know, that, that particular type of individual, 00:12:35.789 --> 00:12:38.940 but it's. Yeah it's really interesting to watch 00:12:38.940 --> 00:12:40.940 from an outsider perspective because i've also 00:12:40.940 --> 00:12:44.700 experience experience with you know. What you 00:12:44.700 --> 00:12:46.580 said the other day when we're at uni i remember 00:12:46.580 --> 00:12:48.220 you said something about being the first one 00:12:48.220 --> 00:12:50.840 that got signed out of your cohort something 00:12:50.840 --> 00:12:54.279 like that. Oh well for me it was more so yeah 00:12:54.279 --> 00:12:58.029 like it's interesting is in drama school. In 00:12:58.029 --> 00:13:00.970 my year, I was never really like that person 00:13:00.970 --> 00:13:05.330 to be in like the top, the top of the teacher's 00:13:05.330 --> 00:13:08.929 list and the tutor's list for like being really 00:13:08.929 --> 00:13:12.830 successful or amazing. And even my peers, like 00:13:12.830 --> 00:13:15.110 it's actually quite interesting. Very little 00:13:15.110 --> 00:13:18.429 was I asked to like read for them in, you know, 00:13:18.509 --> 00:13:20.629 auditions and things like that during the course. 00:13:22.220 --> 00:13:24.500 And I think a lot of people doubted me, which 00:13:24.500 --> 00:13:28.159 is such a shame. And I really felt that, that 00:13:28.159 --> 00:13:31.100 people doubted me. And look, could be in my head, 00:13:31.100 --> 00:13:33.019 but it's just what I was feeling at the time 00:13:33.019 --> 00:13:36.779 from what I was seeing and my tutors and things 00:13:36.779 --> 00:13:40.139 like that. I had some incredibly phenomenal tutors, 00:13:40.379 --> 00:13:43.379 but some I feel like didn't think I would kind 00:13:43.379 --> 00:13:47.299 of get to where I've gotten. And I ended up being 00:13:47.299 --> 00:13:50.980 the first, I think I was one of the first females 00:13:50.980 --> 00:13:56.139 in the course that was signed by a really great 00:13:56.139 --> 00:13:58.919 agency and i think i was one of the first girls 00:13:58.919 --> 00:14:04.559 to book a book a big big gig and it's interesting 00:14:04.559 --> 00:14:07.059 like the amount of people that all of a sudden 00:14:07.059 --> 00:14:10.659 will like. um you know i had this like jealousy 00:14:10.659 --> 00:14:14.159 complex or like oh my god like rose like really 00:14:14.159 --> 00:14:17.879 and it's and it's so interesting because now 00:14:17.879 --> 00:14:20.659 that i've you know succeeded in that sort of 00:14:20.659 --> 00:14:23.879 way the people that i've like not necessarily 00:14:23.879 --> 00:14:27.820 attracted into my life but have come across who 00:14:27.820 --> 00:14:30.720 have tried to slide back in there, even friends 00:14:30.720 --> 00:14:33.820 from school that I'm not friends with anymore 00:14:33.820 --> 00:14:37.220 who used to bully me to my core have slid back 00:14:37.220 --> 00:14:40.940 and been like, Oh my God, this is amazing. Like, 00:14:41.320 --> 00:14:45.279 this is so cool. It's like really bad. It's, 00:14:45.500 --> 00:14:47.679 it's, it just makes me laugh. To be honest, it's 00:14:47.679 --> 00:14:50.580 embarrassing. Um, but they clearly, they don't 00:14:50.580 --> 00:14:53.659 have my best interest at heart whatsoever. People 00:14:53.659 --> 00:14:57.299 can change, but for me personally, like, Yeah 00:14:57.299 --> 00:15:00.379 i you can never fully trust someone who has done 00:15:00.379 --> 00:15:02.299 you wrong done you wrong and betrayed you in 00:15:02.299 --> 00:15:04.980 that way again not say you can't forgive them 00:15:04.980 --> 00:15:07.080 like i'm sure you don't have any bad complete 00:15:07.080 --> 00:15:09.620 bad blood against these people now i know i don't 00:15:09.620 --> 00:15:12.519 speak to these people you would never you weren't 00:15:12.519 --> 00:15:14.080 there from the start you know you're you know 00:15:14.080 --> 00:15:16.419 you're real one yeah you know you're real one 00:15:16.419 --> 00:15:20.980 so that was my kind of experience. Let's find 00:15:20.980 --> 00:15:23.600 it in the workplace as well because i think that's 00:15:23.600 --> 00:15:26.389 something that is as you know. 20 some things 00:15:26.389 --> 00:15:28.750 that work is somewhere where we spend quite a 00:15:28.750 --> 00:15:32.870 bit of our time. And it's such a shame to even 00:15:32.870 --> 00:15:36.669 from an outsider, like to see not not as an outsider, 00:15:36.889 --> 00:15:38.970 sorry, I worded that wrong. But even as someone 00:15:38.970 --> 00:15:42.649 who is not involved in situations like this personally 00:15:42.649 --> 00:15:46.190 in my workplace, I see it so often about, you 00:15:46.190 --> 00:15:48.529 know, people that will pretend to get along with 00:15:48.529 --> 00:15:50.669 these people. And then I'll literally hear them 00:15:50.669 --> 00:15:52.629 talking about them behind their backs. And I'm 00:15:52.629 --> 00:15:56.600 like, What what's that about like that's not 00:15:56.600 --> 00:15:58.580 and this could be in relation to anything this 00:15:58.580 --> 00:16:01.539 is gonna be in relation to you know You thinking 00:16:01.539 --> 00:16:03.159 that they're on a power trip because they're 00:16:03.159 --> 00:16:05.500 in a you know higher position than you I say 00:16:05.500 --> 00:16:09.500 in inverted commas or you know I don't know. 00:16:09.539 --> 00:16:12.279 Yeah, they've gotten a promotion at work or as 00:16:12.279 --> 00:16:13.980 you mentioned before or something like that, 00:16:13.980 --> 00:16:17.279 but it's just I think the whole point of this 00:16:17.279 --> 00:16:19.500 episode is it's really just such a shame and 00:16:19.500 --> 00:16:22.200 it really just makes you feel more lonely and 00:16:22.200 --> 00:16:25.299 more drained yourself than it is to the other 00:16:25.299 --> 00:16:27.820 person so it's got nothing to do with them it's 00:16:27.820 --> 00:16:30.139 got everything to do with you. Yeah it shows 00:16:30.139 --> 00:16:32.919 more about your insecurities and your character 00:16:32.919 --> 00:16:34.980 and the work that you need to be doing in therapy 00:16:34.980 --> 00:16:37.580 if you're constantly feeling like you need to 00:16:37.580 --> 00:16:39.539 put somebody down because they're succeeding 00:16:39.539 --> 00:16:42.000 and you know what it stems from such a young 00:16:42.000 --> 00:16:44.679 age that this is what humans and societies are 00:16:44.679 --> 00:16:48.259 like. I like in general like how many times did 00:16:48.259 --> 00:16:51.659 we hear is kids that you know if that boy is 00:16:51.659 --> 00:16:54.200 bullying you they like you and I know that's 00:16:54.200 --> 00:16:57.700 got nothing to do with you know a success story 00:16:57.700 --> 00:17:00.879 but it's like why why are we like that why why 00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:04.619 do we have to normalize that is like no be nice 00:17:04.619 --> 00:17:07.859 to people their successes are in their life for 00:17:07.859 --> 00:17:10.440 a reason your successes will come to you in due 00:17:10.440 --> 00:17:13.559 time. Don't sit there and hate on someone else 00:17:13.559 --> 00:17:15.099 just because they're doing a good job at what 00:17:15.099 --> 00:17:16.720 they're doing. It's got nothing to do with you. 00:17:17.039 --> 00:17:19.160 Absolutely nothing to do with you. So stop trying 00:17:19.160 --> 00:17:21.039 to fit yourself into their equation when you 00:17:21.039 --> 00:17:22.460 don't need to be in there in the first place. 00:17:22.460 --> 00:17:25.259 And I think people a lot of the time too, um, 00:17:25.599 --> 00:17:28.099 in kind of any industry is like, Oh, but like 00:17:28.099 --> 00:17:30.660 they didn't deserve that. Like I work so hard, 00:17:30.660 --> 00:17:32.759 like they didn't work hard at all. And they're 00:17:32.759 --> 00:17:36.140 so successful. Look, that's life. Sometimes it's 00:17:36.140 --> 00:17:39.190 luck and people are in the right place at the 00:17:39.190 --> 00:17:41.930 right time with the right people and it can happen 00:17:41.930 --> 00:17:45.230 for them the acting industry is full of it is 00:17:45.230 --> 00:17:48.309 full of it you know you've got nepotism as well 00:17:48.309 --> 00:17:51.130 nepotism is a huge huge thing and maybe we'll 00:17:51.130 --> 00:17:53.369 do maybe we should do an episode on nepotism 00:17:53.369 --> 00:17:55.529 yeah because that's really interesting in any 00:17:55.529 --> 00:17:58.089 workplace that'll be in those situations yeah 00:17:58.089 --> 00:18:00.269 i think this is also a good time to because a 00:18:00.269 --> 00:18:02.349 lot of people also think like on that topic for 00:18:02.349 --> 00:18:05.529 example about the the nepotism and you know being 00:18:05.529 --> 00:18:09.329 born into Even if it's not fame, wealth, or something 00:18:09.329 --> 00:18:11.410 like that, inheritance, I think we see a lot 00:18:11.410 --> 00:18:14.349 of that in Australia, especially in the European 00:18:14.349 --> 00:18:18.630 community, at least for me. Like in, yeah, from 00:18:18.630 --> 00:18:20.690 what I've seen. But remember what I was telling 00:18:20.690 --> 00:18:22.890 you that my dad told me the other day about, 00:18:22.950 --> 00:18:24.930 you know, it's not the, we were talking about, 00:18:26.069 --> 00:18:29.309 we ended up meeting someone very great at an 00:18:29.309 --> 00:18:32.230 event we attended recently. and we were like 00:18:32.230 --> 00:18:34.730 very great and it was so funny how we were like 00:18:34.730 --> 00:18:37.470 we were supposed to like be there at that time 00:18:37.470 --> 00:18:41.170 to meet this person and rose started saying like 00:18:41.170 --> 00:18:44.380 you know. i'm telling you this industry or like 00:18:44.380 --> 00:18:47.019 these people in life and life in general and 00:18:47.019 --> 00:18:49.779 the success of people is all who you know not 00:18:49.779 --> 00:18:52.400 what you know and i went actually funny you say 00:18:52.400 --> 00:18:53.980 that because i was having a conversation with 00:18:53.980 --> 00:18:57.000 my dad this is like probably the 12th time i've 00:18:57.000 --> 00:18:59.819 your dad emmanuel's dad cost a shout out to you 00:18:59.819 --> 00:19:02.059 because you spit some bangers my friend does 00:19:02.059 --> 00:19:04.019 he really does i'll be quoting him quite a bit 00:19:04.019 --> 00:19:07.059 in this podcast but he said actually i don't 00:19:07.059 --> 00:19:10.569 think it is who you know or what you know it's 00:19:10.569 --> 00:19:13.390 actually what you do so what you do with what 00:19:13.390 --> 00:19:15.970 you know exactly what and who you know and who 00:19:15.970 --> 00:19:17.529 you know because he goes you could be sitting 00:19:17.529 --> 00:19:20.309 in a room full of people that are exactly in 00:19:20.309 --> 00:19:21.849 the position you want to be and if you don't 00:19:21.849 --> 00:19:23.829 make the effort to go out and have a conversation 00:19:23.829 --> 00:19:27.190 with them take their you know advice and and 00:19:27.190 --> 00:19:30.349 use their actions and listen to them nothing 00:19:30.349 --> 00:19:31.809 good will come of it what's the point of you 00:19:31.809 --> 00:19:33.769 knowing those people in the first place just 00:19:33.769 --> 00:19:36.930 like if you know all the stuff but you think 00:19:36.930 --> 00:19:40.529 that you're you know Superior on your own without 00:19:40.529 --> 00:19:43.230 the connection of other people you're not gonna 00:19:43.230 --> 00:19:45.329 be the most successful version of yourself you 00:19:45.329 --> 00:19:49.930 can be but just like what you know is not so 00:19:49.930 --> 00:19:52.450 beneficial without who you know who you know 00:19:52.450 --> 00:19:54.650 is not so beneficial without what you do with 00:19:54.650 --> 00:19:57.390 it. So I thought that was a great piece of advice 00:19:57.390 --> 00:19:59.390 and that will be ingrained in me for a very very 00:19:59.390 --> 00:20:01.349 long time. Yeah that's a very very good piece 00:20:01.349 --> 00:20:03.829 of advice and something that like because you 00:20:03.829 --> 00:20:06.150 know all the time we're like oh it's it's luck 00:20:06.150 --> 00:20:09.349 and it's all about you know connections and networking 00:20:09.349 --> 00:20:12.809 and things like that yeah okay fair fair and 00:20:12.809 --> 00:20:16.609 that's step one but then step two is like what 00:20:16.609 --> 00:20:19.230 are you actually going to do about that you know 00:20:19.230 --> 00:20:22.099 and same with like as Emanuella said we met some 00:20:22.099 --> 00:20:26.079 really great people at this event that we attended 00:20:26.079 --> 00:20:29.759 the other week. Shout out to two particular people 00:20:29.759 --> 00:20:32.960 who will probably be listening to this podcast. 00:20:34.000 --> 00:20:37.460 Bless them. And we like made like a really genuine 00:20:37.460 --> 00:20:40.599 connection with them and have kept in touch and 00:20:40.599 --> 00:20:44.049 will probably continue to keep in touch. and 00:20:44.049 --> 00:20:46.450 collaborate with them and from a very genuine 00:20:46.450 --> 00:20:50.049 from a very genuine place like a genuine connection 00:20:50.049 --> 00:20:52.589 organically which is exactly why and it's crazy 00:20:52.589 --> 00:20:54.549 like you never know how did it start we were 00:20:54.549 --> 00:20:56.569 what playing pool we were literally playing pool 00:20:56.569 --> 00:20:59.210 and this man was explaining to his son how to 00:20:59.210 --> 00:21:02.089 play pool and little do we know he's this like 00:21:02.089 --> 00:21:05.450 you know big ball or in in a specific industry 00:21:05.450 --> 00:21:08.009 and we were like wow like that was just like 00:21:08.009 --> 00:21:11.269 a cherry on such a genuine connection yeah. And 00:21:11.269 --> 00:21:13.630 it was, yeah, really beautiful. And we're, you 00:21:13.630 --> 00:21:16.329 know, now great friends with these people because 00:21:16.329 --> 00:21:18.809 they were such genuine people. And that's very 00:21:18.809 --> 00:21:23.049 rare to meet a genuine person that doesn't sit 00:21:23.049 --> 00:21:25.789 there and is jealous. And you can tell. This 00:21:25.789 --> 00:21:28.549 is why I started by saying the first point. You 00:21:28.549 --> 00:21:31.170 can always tell who is genuine and who isn't 00:21:31.170 --> 00:21:33.849 deep, deep, deep down, even if they're your best 00:21:33.849 --> 00:21:37.190 friend. I'm telling you, you can tell. You always 00:21:37.190 --> 00:21:39.690 know. You always know. You're like, are you? 00:21:39.680 --> 00:21:41.880 Are you actually happy for me? Are you actually 00:21:41.880 --> 00:21:45.480 going to help me? You know, you can always, always 00:21:45.480 --> 00:21:48.039 feel it. Even if you don't want to like admit 00:21:48.039 --> 00:21:50.779 it to yourself, you just know. And you know what? 00:21:51.079 --> 00:21:54.240 Unfortunately, like in a lot of best friendships, 00:21:54.259 --> 00:21:56.440 there is always going to be that little, especially 00:21:56.440 --> 00:21:58.920 if you're in the same kind of industry, a tad 00:21:58.920 --> 00:22:02.829 of competition or a tad of jealousy. It's human 00:22:02.829 --> 00:22:05.569 nature. It's it's what being a human is. You 00:22:05.569 --> 00:22:08.069 feel certain emotions and whatnot. But like it 00:22:08.069 --> 00:22:10.730 just comes down to being a good person and understanding 00:22:10.730 --> 00:22:13.690 that, you know, you might have that, you know, 00:22:13.970 --> 00:22:15.829 downfall about yourself that you might be the 00:22:15.829 --> 00:22:17.930 type that even their your closest friend, you 00:22:17.930 --> 00:22:20.329 know, you might get this inkling of, you know, 00:22:20.390 --> 00:22:22.690 why wasn't that me or, you know, and that could 00:22:22.690 --> 00:22:26.180 be in relation to anything. It all comes down 00:22:26.180 --> 00:22:28.079 to you recognizing that you can control your 00:22:28.079 --> 00:22:30.099 emotions you can control the type of person you 00:22:30.099 --> 00:22:32.319 are you can't control them and what was meant 00:22:32.319 --> 00:22:33.819 for them was for them and what was meant for 00:22:33.819 --> 00:22:37.240 you will be for you. Absolutely nothing good 00:22:37.240 --> 00:22:41.220 that comes from hating on someone successes because. 00:22:42.279 --> 00:22:44.880 They've worked for it. It's that simple it doesn't 00:22:44.880 --> 00:22:46.779 matter how they got there or what it matters 00:22:46.779 --> 00:22:48.460 what they're doing with it and if they're doing 00:22:48.460 --> 00:22:50.720 well and they're genuine person and you like 00:22:50.720 --> 00:22:52.099 them in your life there's no reason for there 00:22:52.099 --> 00:22:54.140 to be any form of jealousy whatsoever and you 00:22:54.140 --> 00:22:56.319 can't just hate on them for that reason and we 00:22:56.319 --> 00:22:59.059 are talking. Now on the perspective of someone 00:22:59.059 --> 00:23:00.859 that is close to you and someone that you know 00:23:00.859 --> 00:23:04.240 but I think we're bringing tall poppy syndrome 00:23:04.240 --> 00:23:06.960 down to like. In the realm of things that could 00:23:06.960 --> 00:23:10.539 help our listeners because you know I mean sure 00:23:10.539 --> 00:23:12.799 we can give you advice on how to stop hating 00:23:12.799 --> 00:23:15.369 you know. artists on the internet but it's not 00:23:15.369 --> 00:23:17.930 going to benefit your life so much. That'll come 00:23:17.930 --> 00:23:20.230 as a result of being a good person overall. Yeah 00:23:20.230 --> 00:23:23.869 and I think like to kind of conclude there and 00:23:23.869 --> 00:23:27.210 be like okay how can we kind of push back against 00:23:27.210 --> 00:23:30.369 that sort of to feel that way it's like I've 00:23:30.369 --> 00:23:33.130 got a I've gotten written down here is firstly 00:23:33.130 --> 00:23:36.349 create environments that celebrate success and 00:23:36.349 --> 00:23:39.329 community if you're surrounded by people that 00:23:40.530 --> 00:23:43.950 envy successes and are sort of jealous towards 00:23:43.950 --> 00:23:47.069 that sort of thing. You don't really want to 00:23:47.069 --> 00:23:49.150 be surrounding yourself in that. No, it's so 00:23:49.150 --> 00:23:52.410 draining. Secondly, practice genuine support. 00:23:52.730 --> 00:23:57.230 Clap for your friends when they win. It is so, 00:23:57.349 --> 00:24:00.789 so simple to just be like, you know what? I'm 00:24:00.789 --> 00:24:03.809 happy for you. I'm happy for you. And be good 00:24:03.809 --> 00:24:07.609 on you. It's so freeing to be genuine about it 00:24:07.609 --> 00:24:10.700 as well. Like, Like Rose got told some really 00:24:10.700 --> 00:24:12.640 good news the other day and I was literally crying 00:24:12.640 --> 00:24:14.859 for her about it. Like I'm being dead serious. 00:24:15.039 --> 00:24:18.380 Like, and I'm not even, it wasn't like I genuinely 00:24:18.380 --> 00:24:21.700 just felt her. Yeah. And it was like, she got 00:24:21.700 --> 00:24:25.180 emotional. I wasn't getting emotional. I was 00:24:25.180 --> 00:24:27.880 like so stunned by this news. And I just started 00:24:27.880 --> 00:24:29.740 crying. And she started crying and I started 00:24:29.740 --> 00:24:31.420 crying because she was crying. And I was like, 00:24:31.579 --> 00:24:33.970 dude, I don't think I've ever had any... Actually, 00:24:34.210 --> 00:24:37.730 besides my parents, I don't think I've had any 00:24:37.730 --> 00:24:40.809 friend in my life that has cried for me. Are 00:24:40.809 --> 00:24:43.849 you being serious? Because of the way that I've 00:24:43.849 --> 00:24:45.789 succeeded if you're the first person. I'm such 00:24:45.789 --> 00:24:48.589 an empathetic person. Like genuinely, I sit there 00:24:48.589 --> 00:24:51.390 and I'm like, no genuinely, I'm like, I get very 00:24:51.390 --> 00:24:53.029 happy about things like this. I'm also just the 00:24:53.029 --> 00:24:54.710 type of person that for example, like even with 00:24:54.710 --> 00:24:57.109 gifts and stuff, I love seeing people's reactions 00:24:57.109 --> 00:24:59.289 to the kind that I give them because I'm so like, 00:24:59.549 --> 00:25:03.049 I just love it. I love, guys, it feels so good 00:25:03.049 --> 00:25:05.529 to be a good person, like seriously. And you 00:25:05.529 --> 00:25:07.809 get rewarded like good karma is definitely a 00:25:07.809 --> 00:25:10.069 thing. It's a real thing. You will get rewarded. 00:25:10.930 --> 00:25:17.049 And the last thing is reframe ambition as inspiration, 00:25:17.230 --> 00:25:21.569 not threat. I think if you look at somebody and 00:25:21.569 --> 00:25:23.990 you have this feeling like, oh, I wish that was 00:25:23.990 --> 00:25:26.589 me or like, why are they successful and I'm not, 00:25:27.069 --> 00:25:30.069 reframe that as inspiration. Be like, okay. this 00:25:30.069 --> 00:25:33.529 person can do it, I can do it too. Let me work 00:25:33.529 --> 00:25:36.250 on my craft, let me work on myself to get to 00:25:36.250 --> 00:25:38.170 a point that I want to get to or to achieve a 00:25:38.170 --> 00:25:39.930 certain goal. Exactly, because clearly it's possible. 00:25:40.430 --> 00:25:42.390 That's like, you know, saying that you're going 00:25:42.390 --> 00:25:43.930 to go to the gym every day and then it doesn't 00:25:43.930 --> 00:25:45.970 happen. Maybe they're just working harder than 00:25:45.970 --> 00:25:48.509 you. Yeah. Maybe that's what it is. Or maybe 00:25:48.509 --> 00:25:50.269 they're not. Maybe they're not working harder 00:25:50.269 --> 00:25:52.529 than you. But that's that's their journey. That's 00:25:52.529 --> 00:25:57.289 that person's life trajectory. It doesn't actually 00:25:57.289 --> 00:26:01.210 matter. anything to do with you. You shouldn't 00:26:01.210 --> 00:26:04.029 let it affect you or your mood or their mood 00:26:04.029 --> 00:26:06.490 or anything to do with anyone but yourself. You 00:26:06.490 --> 00:26:08.609 can control yourself. They will control themselves 00:26:08.609 --> 00:26:11.589 and everyone will be happy. Absolutely. Closing 00:26:11.589 --> 00:26:14.809 thoughts. Tall poppy syndrome might be rooted 00:26:14.809 --> 00:26:17.069 in a desire for fairness, but when we cut down 00:26:17.069 --> 00:26:20.470 those who thrive, we all lose. Exactly. We all 00:26:20.470 --> 00:26:23.869 lose. And I think we kind of also touched on 00:26:23.869 --> 00:26:27.609 Australia in the beginning of our About podcast 00:26:27.609 --> 00:26:30.789 because it's a very very big thing in Australia 00:26:30.789 --> 00:26:33.309 tall poppy syndrome but if we kind of thought 00:26:33.309 --> 00:26:35.930 to ourselves what would Australia look like if 00:26:35.930 --> 00:26:38.390 we learned to lift each other up and not level 00:26:38.390 --> 00:26:40.930 each other down we would be living in a completely 00:26:40.930 --> 00:26:42.710 different environment you know what i think that 00:26:42.710 --> 00:26:44.789 goes with the whole world the whole honestly 00:26:44.789 --> 00:26:47.049 i can sit here and throw in my religious beliefs 00:26:47.049 --> 00:26:49.250 about it too which i'm not going to do but in 00:26:49.250 --> 00:26:53.150 general the whole world is is pretty cooked when 00:26:53.150 --> 00:26:55.910 we when we think about it like. Imagine if the 00:26:55.910 --> 00:26:57.990 whole world was living peacefully and uplifting 00:26:57.990 --> 00:27:00.029 each other constantly wow it would be such a 00:27:00.029 --> 00:27:01.690 fantastic place. Such a different place. But 00:27:01.690 --> 00:27:03.470 you know what we're humans we have free will 00:27:03.470 --> 00:27:06.430 and the way we think and behave is all really 00:27:06.430 --> 00:27:10.250 up to us. And unfortunately some people just 00:27:10.250 --> 00:27:13.390 choose to have that outlook on life and it's 00:27:13.390 --> 00:27:15.309 really unfortunate but we're here to help you 00:27:15.309 --> 00:27:18.289 guys as well because we love everyone. We do 00:27:18.289 --> 00:27:21.230 love everyone everyone is. has has some sort 00:27:21.230 --> 00:27:23.890 of good in them no one is born inherently evil 00:27:23.890 --> 00:27:28.750 and um wow that just took a massive turn it really 00:27:28.750 --> 00:27:31.630 did so a poppy syndrome to evil no i think we're 00:27:31.630 --> 00:27:34.430 going to conclude it there guys um i think like 00:27:34.430 --> 00:27:36.809 this episode i wasn't sure about it at the beginning 00:27:36.809 --> 00:27:38.369 because i thought we were going to take a much 00:27:38.369 --> 00:27:43.210 more um like career path yeah but i think we 00:27:43.210 --> 00:27:45.990 made it relatable in a sense where you can apply 00:27:45.990 --> 00:27:48.799 it in everyday life yeah So we hope this has 00:27:48.799 --> 00:27:50.299 helped you guys in some way, even if you could 00:27:50.299 --> 00:27:52.339 take one little thing from it and share it. That 00:27:52.339 --> 00:27:55.819 would be fantastic. Absolutely. And as we said, 00:27:55.980 --> 00:27:59.900 we are here to help you help us and is that our 00:27:59.900 --> 00:28:02.539 motto? We are here to help you to help us. I 00:28:02.539 --> 00:28:04.000 reckon that's going to be our motto. I've been 00:28:04.000 --> 00:28:06.700 saying it too much. Too much. But it's the official 00:28:06.700 --> 00:28:12.519 lostish motto. Hell yeah. Alright. Give it a 00:28:12.519 --> 00:28:15.059 share, guys, if you've enjoyed it. Yes, give 00:28:15.059 --> 00:28:18.160 it a like. We've got some new listeners in new 00:28:18.160 --> 00:28:21.599 countries. We do. We do. I saw South African 00:28:21.599 --> 00:28:24.599 the other day. I was like, wow. Oh my god, love 00:28:24.599 --> 00:28:26.559 that. It's great. It's so nice guys seeing all 00:28:26.559 --> 00:28:28.220 your stuff and we promise we will start being 00:28:28.220 --> 00:28:30.519 more consistent on our social platforms as well. 00:28:30.700 --> 00:28:33.519 Yes, we've had to pause the social platforms 00:28:33.519 --> 00:28:37.200 because we've had a lot going on. but we will 00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:40.819 be back there soon and tune in to the next episode 00:28:40.819 --> 00:28:45.980 of The Lostish Podcast. Bye guys.