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Grand Theft Galactic. Episode 3: Deal with the
Devil. Last time on Grand Theft Galactic. Our
heroes were planning to sneak into the Husk Technology
Convention to steal a faster-than-light engine
prototype. With forged inventor passes and Fuzz
set to be their sham innovation, the group headed
into the event, leaving Kessel and Fixer behind
to hack the security system if needed. On the
convention floor, Fuzz fooled the attendees while
the others were on the lookout for clues to the
location of the target. Fortunately, Simon Husk
himself got on the loudspeaker and announced
that there would be a special presentation in
the Southwest Hangar later that day. The group
decided to send Lu to the hangar to scout. But
before Lu could head out, Jackson had an inspiration.
He had begun to think that Fixer might be a Simon
Husk superfan in disguise. So the group went
rogue. hiding their actual plan from both Kessel
and Fixer by claiming they were investigating
some attendees that were showing too much interest
in Fuzz. After Lu determined that the engine
was ripe for the picking inside a star shuttle,
the group split up. Lu and Soup headed for the
hangar to steal the shuttle, and Jackson and
Fuzz headed back to Kessel's ship to prepare
to capture Fixer if necessary. Unfortunately,
neither of the pairs succeeded at their tasks.
as they were each met with the business end of
a blaster. Can our heroes escape this predicament?
Let's find out. And so we pick up. Jackson, a
barrel to your face. Unfortunately, a sight all
too familiar. The thought goes racing through your
mind. It's happening again. Husk has you. Again.
The man you hoped you could trust more than
previous allies has a gun to your face. Is there
anything you'd like to say? Well, there are two
thoughts that are occurring to Jackson right
now. One, he will vocalize. One will stay inside.
The inside thought is, well, at least this time
I actually did what I'm getting arrested for.
The outside thought is, Kessel, Kessel, Kessel.
I bet you think this is some kind of third act
twist reveal, don't you? You're going to be sorry
when you find out this is just an instigating
incident. You know what? Give me an insight check
there, Jackson. Can I have an insight check on
Jackson, even though I'm not in the room? That
I'm possibly slightly unbalanced? What I will
say is... Before you give me that result, did
you leave your recorder on so that way the rest
of the other two members of your team who aren't
here could hear that? Oh, we probably are keeping
in communication. Yeah, I would think so. So
Soup and Lu would hear that. Oh my God, I'm
actually good at this. Can Lu insight check
Jackson then? Go for it. Great. That's a 23 insight.
And Lu, the only thing I'll ask you is... What
are you trying to get at? Just like from his
tone of voice, like how is he feeling? Does Jackson
have some secrets that we don't know about? Okay.
Yeah. Let's give me that insight check. Jackson,
you tell me if a roll is necessary. Are you trying
to hide anything in that, like a doublespeak
kind of way? Or are you being pretty open? No,
this is firmly directed towards Kessel. I'm not
trying to send any kind of a secret message.
And just on what I said. What was the role there,
Lu? It was only 11 to find out if Jackson has
secrets that Jackson's not been telling us about
and that we need to worry about who the fuck
Jackson is and what he's doing in the group.
I think based on that roll and the fact that
Jackson's not really trying to hide anything,
you all know he's had run-ins before with the
Husk Corporation. You also know his history being
a studier of post-classical serials that really
he's just referencing his own past and story
structure that he's a fan of. And basically
just telling Kessel, you're not going to have
the last laugh. Just in a very fancy way. Oh,
the drama. And you said 21 on that? 23. 23. Yeah.
And Kessel's not trying to hide anything. He's
being open. You see clearly there's no malice.
There's no anger. It's pure distraught for the
man in front of you. There is not words spoken,
but he mouths to you as if he doesn't want the
person standing next to him, Fixer, to hear him.
He just mouths to you, and you can easily read
his lips of, I hope you're right. And that's
the last thing you see before the triggers are
pulled. Ow! Ow! You hear a small blaster sound,
and your senses leave you. Can I get Constitution
saving throws from everyone, please? Yes! I'm
so good at this. Nope. Whoa. Fuzz got a 21. 21,
Fuzz. Lu. 10. 10. 16 on the die, so 15. Whoa.
Okay. Well, so that's the order things are happening.
Fuzz. Yeah. You're the first one your senses
return to you. Maybe it's because of your Bot
physiology, but... You awaken. You're not sure
how much time has passed. You're in a dark, dank
room. Go ahead and give me a perception check.
Oh, okay. Perception. That is a 19. And I'm going
to use a flashback to make that a 24. Okay. You
pick up on lots of little details. It's very
similar to a cell, except... Not typical jail
bars you would see. It's just stone walls all
around you. A singular lamp hanging above the
ceiling. Adding just enough light where it's
casting eerie shadows throughout the room. Looking
to your left and right, you notice you are seated
on a wooden chair. In between, to your right
is Jackson. To your left is Lu. Both still unconscious.
Do I see Soup anywhere? Soup seems to be missing.
There are only four chairs in this room. The
one you're seated on, the two next to you, and
one in a corner, the visage of the person hidden
in shadows, unmoving at this time. Can I ask
a very important question? Absolutely. Am I on
a human-sized chair or am I on an appropriate
-sized chair? You are on a typical human-sized
chair. wrapped around the post on the right side
so you are actually fully standing. Yeah. And you
are like hog tied to the post. They couldn't even
give me the courtesy of letting me sit down. Oh
I don't see anybody else besides the shadowy
figure? No. All right I'm gonna go uh Lu, Jackson.
Uh wake up. And Jackson being the next constitution
saving throw you will awaken next for seeing
the same sights. Uh not seeing. Jackson is gonna
wake up and keep his eyes closed. Ah. Because I'm
not sure what eyes I have right now. Can I move
my arms? You are bound. So your hands tied behind
your back to the chair behind you. But both arms
are stationary. Both arms? Yes. Cool. It didn't
take my left arm off. That's great. No. And if
you wanted, I'll just say, I think you're kind
of familiar with how the different faces sit
and having experience with all those. Best you
can remember, things are slowly coming back to
you as you're... shaking out the fogginess of
being awakened from unconsciousness. It feels
very similar to the face you were wearing at
the competition. Again, not sure how much time
has passed, but it feels like you have that face
on. All right, that's weirdly comforting. The
eyes will open. You'll see Fuzz seated next to
you. Same thing that you were able to see. Go
ahead and give me a perception check as well.
See if you can beat a 25. No. Just checking.
14. 14. Yeah, you see the same details. Things
are a little more darker for you, a little harder
to make out. But you do see vaguely there's a
chair seated in the corner just outside of the
low light that the lamp above you is shining
down. What I will say is, unfortunately for you,
this feels all too familiar. You know the start
of an interrogation. All right. Suppressing the
panic attack. Lieutenant, how are we doing? Well,
I can't move. I don't see Soup. I don't know.
That's either really good or really bad. We were
double-crossed. And I think you see there's
like an anger that is clearly building up in
Fuzz. Is his little heart glowing? Yeah, his
heart is like pulsing a little bit out of anger.
Like pure, like just pure red. Because I think
there's a moment for him of like Kessel's the
first person that he trusted in this galaxy.
And so he, I think he's struggling to even get
words out now. He's just making, I just, I don't
know. Emotion! And for some reason, at the cue
of emotion, Lu, that's right when you were brought
back to consciousness. Go ahead and give me a
perception check. We'll see if you can beat Fuzz's
bar from earlier. Just 21. Can I use a flashback
on to beat a 25? So that's 26. OK. And this makes
sense, too. So as you become conscious, you shed
a little more light in this room than there was
previously. And you do shine a little bit more
light on the visage of the person in the corner.
It's a face you all are very familiar with unfortunately.
It's Kessel, not bound, but sitting looking haggard,
exhausted. His hair is normally long and tied
in the back is now fully let down, matted with
sweat. He's kind of just arms resting on his
knees, face in his hands. And as he sees you
finally, the last one to awake, he'll slowly
get up and you can clearly see it's difficult
for him to stand. Is Lu tied up in any way?
Go ahead and roll me... We'll say either a medicine
check or an insight check. This is against yourself
here. I guess I'll just say medicine. They're
the same. That's 11. 11? Okay. That combined
with your perception check from earlier, you
do notice as the light is swinging back and forth,
you see something odd about the bulb on top.
You are not bound in any way, but it also seems
like it's pointed specifically at you. The light
bulb? Whatever is attached to the light bulb.
And as you eye it, Kessel, a little bit more
gravel to his voice. Lu, just don't give it
a second thought now. They know your type. They
know you'd be able to slip through most things.
Not that. They will just sit there. Look, I know
I'm the last person you all want to hear from.
Yeah, yeah. SPARKLE! Right? Why are you here?
Why'd you give us up? They wanted me to be the
first thing you all saw when you came to. Look,
I don't have much time. They're only giving me
five minutes here. Look, Jackson, I wasn't lying
when I said I gave you all a shot to fight. So
take the time, stay strong, for yourselves. For Soup.
Where is Soup? They have them right now. What
are they doing to them? What the Husk Corporation
does best, as far as I can tell. There is an
audible flexing of servos as Jackson's left hand
starts to clench and unclench as he struggles
that arm specifically against the bindings
because this is getting far, far too close to
a very painful memory. Kessel, you don't know
if it's willfully ignorant of it or just doesn't
seem to notice it, just continues on. Look, they're
using them as leverage. Look, you can hate me.
This is ultimately my fault, but I tried to shake
the best deal I could for you. You have a chance.
There's going to be a show they're putting on.
You're all going to be sort of the starring talent
on it. You win. You get your freedom. They just
keep me. You lose, well, we all get to keep each
other company. That's the best I could do. Far
as I know, Soup's in the deal where if you win,
they go with you. It's ultimately me going down
as the leader of this little gang. But, look,
you got a week. I don't know exactly what it's
going to be like, but it's to entertain Husk
and his sick cult. So, what type of show is this?
You don't know anything about it? They call it
the Space Race. It's usually a mix of obstacle
courses, trying to get from point A to B, team
sport, which is why I'm assuming they're allowing
you all to compete with each other. It changes
every season. And they're throwing out all the
stops. This is going to be streamed live to the
entire galaxy. How did we end up in this situation,
Kessel? I'm just about at time here. And you
start to hear footsteps on the stone walkway
coming up. I made a mistake. I got caught. I
left myself open, and I don't want that to come
back to you. Like I said, this is the best I
could do. Doors open. Two Husk Bots- Go ahead.
I'm calling bullshit on that. That's a 17 on
insight. 17? As far as you can tell, you're really
good at reading people. This is a man speaking
truth. And then go ahead, since you did the insight
check and pass, roll me a history check. That's
a 10. 10 even? What I will say is you're thinking
back to just recent events. There was some odd
hesitation when Kessel introduced Fixer. You
don't remember exact details of that conversation
that might have tipped you off, but something
feels strange about how fast this has all gone
downhill since that moment. All right. Noted.
Noted. But with that... Two Husk security Bots
walk in, and even as he's trying to continue
to speak, just remember, stay together- A hand
clamps against his mouth, instantly silencing
him, and he's dragged very unceremoniously out
of the room, and the door is closed. At that
moment, Lu will try to shrink down. Instantly,
as soon as you start to, the device, a red light
shines, you hear a beep, and the light becomes
so bright, you can start to feel your form. It's
very similar to when you try to stretch larger
than you should, and you start to feel like you're
losing a piece of yourself. They'll stop. And the
light, as soon as it senses that, will start
to dim back to its dim light. So what are we
supposed to do? Just sit here for a week until
this Space Race? That's a good question. I've
never watched the Space Race, so I don't really
know what it's about. So with that admission
from Lu, then Fuzz and Jackson, can you both
give me history checks to see if you have been
viewers of this show? I'm not proud of it. What
was the roll? 23. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. 21. 21.
You both are well caught up. It's our thing.
Yeah. Yeah. This is where we bond. Yeah. The
Lieutenant and Jackson. We have our favorite
teams. This is our thing. Yeah, season five was
a highlight. It was the first time that... Oh,
don't get me started. It was the first time a
stellar got to win. It was very spectacular.
It was a great season all around. These contestants
go to various exotic planets that have minimal civilization
would tasked with getting to point A and point
B. So normally they're dropped within a solar
system, and it's like, hey, you know, you're
dropped off the farthest planet from the sun.
Get to the third planet, and then that'll be
the finish line. There are various things. One
season, it was completely uninhabited. It was
almost a mix of Space Survivor with the Space
Race. That was a fun collab in season seven.
Other races, though, they will go to populated
centers and then it's more of a negotiation thing
of like, can you get rides with limited funds?
How do you bargain up to get to the other planets
and things like that? Because travel is costly.
Sounds amazing. Yeah, I'd say it's a very amazing
Space Race. Daniel's quickly learning how I come
up with that. Roll credits. But you're both very
familiar with that. Team sizes will vary. I'd
say bog standard normally it's a team of two,
but there have been teams as large as five competing
in some seasons. Mass-wise, we're good. Yeah.
This feels a little bit strange. One, you both
vaguely remember hearing that it might be livestreamed.
Kessel kind of confirmed that. Two, it seems
odd. Normally it seems like these are quote-unquote
everyday people or people that Husk has specifically
chosen to be like, look how happy people are
in this galaxy-wide corporation of mine. So
for you all to be picked, that's the thing that's
sticking out right now. Ex-criminal, quote-unquote
convicted. in the way that Husk does justice,
Jackson, but then the rest of you knowing, apparently
Husk knows who you are, knows what you've done
to him and his corporation. The fact that he
would allow you on this show brings some questions
to mind. Well, I mean, we could spend the next
week, Lu. go in episode by episode at every
Space Race. With a description? Yeah. Describe it
all to me? Yes in extreme detail. That sounds incredible
but it might not be as useful as you think. While
this is happening yes how uh just to clarify
how are we bound to these chairs uh sort of like
wrists down to the back legs kind of a deal? It's
like arms wrapped behind the chair and then yes
wrist bound to the the legs of the chair themselves
not a lot of give so you're just kind of stuck
with your back of your hands against the back
of the chair. All right can can the hands touch?
Go ahead and give me either an athletics or acrobatics
check. That's a 16 acrobatics uh yes grand I'm
gonna try to grab the back of my left hand with
my right hand so it's immobilized and try to
remove the cyber arm from the other arm so I
at least have a little more motion, Great would
you have thought to try to potentially hide this
motion given what you saw earlier with Lu that
when they tried to perform some kind of action?
Absolutely not they want a show I'll give them
a damn show. Instantly you see a red light start
to flare the lights get brighter but this time
the swaying of the lamp, which at first seemed
natural, stops. A spotlight is put on Jackson and
you quickly hear not walking this time running
footsteps. Go ahead and give me one more athletics
or acrobatics to see if you're able to pull off
your arm before they enter the room. Uh it's a
16. 16m all right let's see here. No I'm sorry that's
a 15 on the die plus their athletics bonus uh
two Bots instantly rush and see you struggling
in what they assume is some kind of attempt.
Uh, and- They'd be right. Yeah. Uh, without hesitation,
three blaster sounds and blackness. So friends...
What exactly are we preparing? Uh, we're, we're
going to kind of go a little abstract for this
over the next seven days. Uh, you all are escorted
to a facility you're not familiar with. A prison?
But it's much nicer accommodations than you would
normally expect. Jackson, you especially are
confused by this. There is no beatings. There
is... I mean, I'll take it. Yeah. There is around
-the-clock security, but you all are given a
lot of free time. And the other thing that's
eerie is it's a decently sized compound. I'd
say if you're familiar living in an apartment
complex, it's like two buildings next to each
other with a small amount of area between them.
Provided food, nice-ish areas, for rest and leisure,
full gym for exercise if needed, and given free
time. There's no forced labor in any ways. This
doesn't seem like anything I've understood of
the Husk Corporation. No, this seems too nice.
This seems like establishing B-roll. Oh. That
makes sense. Yeah. Jackson is going to be very
mindful about where the surveillance cameras
are because we are being set up for a montage
for our introductions. Go ahead. And with that
in mind, Jackson, since you've figured it out,
you can roll technology or perception at advantage.
The other two, either of those rolls, just roll
them straight. I'll take a 16. 16. Good roll.
Fuzz? 19, technology. Lu? 25, perception. Jeez,
okay. You do clock some, and it's in the most
obvious spots where they could get the wide view,
and it's in, you know, so they can see the entire
workout area, in the common areas where they
can see you interacting with each other. Fuzz,
what you were able to see with that technology
roll, too, is there are more obvious ones where
it's almost like you're supposed to see them
and know you're on camera. There are a couple
more hidden cameras in some places. But you expect
nothing for nefarious purposes, just to get some
better shots. Lu, with that roll and your passage
street, you also see, though, there's additional
appendages attached to them. Some of the lights
blinking remind you of what was on that lamp
earlier. So while it might seem like you're given
a bit more freedom, it also seems like they'd
be ready to react if at any time you're doing
something a little more nefarious in nature than
just prepping for your debut. So Lu's going
to pretend to be lifting weights, I guess. I
mean, like lifting weights, I guess. But talking
to the other two as quietly as possible. What
sort of a show should we put on right now? Is
this where we hide our actual abilities? Or is
this where we come out swinging and charming
so that we win the audience? What are we supposed
to be doing here? I think you never want to start
as the favorite. Great. We never want to start
as a favorite. Also, we don't want to start as
the heel because we don't want to... Tip our
hats? Hands? Tip our feet? Hands. Yeah, tip our
hands. Well, nicely done, Lu. Thank you. All
right. Good use of the idiom. You don't want
to be the bad guy from the get-go. That'll only
get you so far. And if the audience gets the
chance to vote on things like advantages or something
like that, then you're... Going to be kind of
out of luck. So we should be the underdogs? I'm
feeling underdogs. Now, very importantly, I think
we need to keep our eyes out because this is
an awfully large facility for three people. Do
we have roommates who are also seemingly going
to be engaging in this fantastic televised debacle?
At least for the first couple days, no one else
appears. This is going to be one boring TV show.
Yeah, it is. Does that mean that we are the only
non-voluntary ones? That could be. Great. All
right. Well, Fuzz has a toothpick with two marshmallows
on it and he's lifting it like weights. Don't
ask him where he got the marshmallows. Perfect.
I assume that they're in our kitchen area. Yeah,
that's right. They were provided with a hot chocolate.
Absolutely. It's just insulting when they give
you the marshmallows. The worst part is they're
slightly stale. That's good, right? Don't you
want slightly stale muscles? Yeah, because then
they're hard. So they're harder to lift. It's
a better workout. Oh, they're heavier too. That's
how that works, right? So is there any action
in particular? Any other discussions you'd like
to have? Do we see any other actual organic human
beings or organic beings of any sort other than
the security drones? You see... a couple people
it seems like uh again outside... Go ahead and give
me a perception check. I don't see a damn
thing that's a five five no what i will say is
you hear rumblings outside you you assume they're
voices but what's happening out there you're
not quite sure but uh bending anybody else wanting
to do anything specific around I'd say midday
of day two, a door appears, it seems like, almost
out of a wall that you did not think was an actual
entrance. It just kind of recesses, slides away,
and then two Husk bots walk forward, escorting
somebody in civilian clothing, somebody that
you all vaguely recognize. You've seen him on...
Fucker. I mean... Fixer. No, no, no. Okay. I
wouldn't do that to you. No, instead it's everybody's
favorite news anchor from Galactic News Network.
Dr. Nuo Martin. And you see him with a pad
and a pencil, which seems very archaic, but it
seems like maybe he's a man who likes to do it
old school. And he takes a seat in one of the
common areas and gestures for all three of you
to sit at the couch across from him. Hello, I
am Dr. Nuo Martin. It's a pleasure to meet
you all. Are you ready for your interviews? Interviews?
Yes, what are these about? Oh, please. I assumed
all of you are familiar with the show. No. I
just thought with a new format we'd be doing
something a little less stale and, you know,
old hat. Well, as you can see, I like to do things
by the book. No, I've been tasked, actually commanded
to step away from my newscasting duties. Completely
in agreeance with that. And you see him just
kind of like wave the pencil and acknowledgement
to one of the corners and one of the cameras
in the corners. No, I will be following your
team and their exploits throughout the season.
I will be your personal narrator, your personal
interviewer. So please don't fuck this up. You
spark a type of anger in me that I cannot describe.
Excellent. We like to see the passion! Now. Take
a seat. Take a seat. Let's see. Now, quickly,
just give me a two-sentence teaser line about
where you come from and why the audience should
be rooting for you. Let's go with the little
toy man. Oh, no. Dude, such a bad- Jackson
is gesturing just, no, no, don't say that. Oh,
no. I think Fuzz, the heart starts to glow bright
red, and he starts to, if a Bot could breathe,
his shoulders come up and down, and he walks
up to Dr. Nuo Martin and goes, you, sir, will
not ever call me a toy, a little toy man again,
all right? I'm a big boy. Oh, I see. I am a fan
of the classics. We got a classic Pinocchio situation
here. A toy who wants to be real. The people
are going to love this. I look at Lu and you
see that my hand is start to go to my stun gun.
And Lu will just say, is it time for a Hey-Yo
Silver? And look at Jackson. Jackson is going
to look at the door they came in from. Bots are
there? They are there. Door is closed? It's open
right now. You know, Evan is having a thought,
but I am uh... Oh, that's real tempting. That's real
tempting. Fuzz, can you either give me a stealth
or a sleight of hand check as you gesture to
your robotic appendage? 18 sleight of hand. 18
sleight of hand. The bots don't seem to take
what you're doing as an aggressive action as
of yet. So you still have some leeway before
they seem to react. I would, under normal circumstances,
Lu, say absolutely. However, there is the matter
of our favorite appetizer that we have yet to
get delivered. I see. Stand down, Fuzz. I don't
think I have the authority to tell you that.
All right. Can somebody pick me up and put me
back on the floor? I got you. Thank you. Lieutenant,
there you go. And you'd be wise to address him
as Lieutenant. Lieutenant. Understood. Understood.
Oh, we love a man in uniform. All righty. Lieutenant
Toy. All right. I understand. Uncontrollable
anger. Oh, yes. Lots of ways we could go about
this. Editing could be fantastic. Oh, he can
control it quite well. Oh, no. Like, no. All
right. All right. Favorite appetizer. That's
a good time. Let's, you know, make you more relatable
to the people. Favorite foods. Go ahead, sir.
You spoke up first. I believe it was a... ancient
Milky Way Earth dish from the southern European
region. I believe it was called Vengeance, and
it is best served cold. That's a Nat one for Dr.
Nuo Martin. It goes right over his head. I've never
heard of that. Are you a studier of culinary
arts? No, I am a scholar, just not of culinary
arts and anthropological cuisine. A scholar turned
criminal. Now, how does that happen? Incompetent
Husk security Bots breaking my face and arm when
they mistake me for the wrong man. How does that
sound? Instantly, you see the doctor just kind
of like doing a cutting motion. Oh, it's all
public record there. Dr. Nuo Martin might
want to report on that. Instantly, the Bots step
up. Go ahead and give... Are you resisting? Nah.
You are lifted by either arm, again in a fashion
a little too familiar, and escorted out of the
room. A little time out. As those two Bots step
up, it is only a matter of seconds before two
more Bots step through the walkway and take honor
guard poses in front of the entryway. It seems
like there might be a little more security than
might have originally been let on. All right.
And how about you? Stars. Exploring the galaxy.
Are you excited about the opportunity to see
more of the beauty that's out there? In this
galaxy? Well, yes. Of course. Do you think you're...
You haven't really seen the show, have you? No,
I have not. I'm 36 million years old. I have
seen enough of this galaxy in its current state.
I don't need to see any more. Aren't you a ray
of sunshine? Pun intended. No, thank you. Walk
out of there, folks. He looks up at the camera
in the corner. This has been Team... I haven't
gotten a name for you folks. Is there something
you'd like to go by for the audience? Something
to just give them an opportunity to shout out
at their television screens and support? Quio?
Quio is the only thing I can think of. Are we
sure about that? Look, I think the gentleman
who got taken away, he seems to be the more eloquent
speaker. How about we table the name for now,
meet with him, really come up with something
that's going to grab the audience. Because trust
me, it's part of the game here, folks. You want
out. You want to live. You want your friend to
be okay. That's the game we got to play. We got
to play. Capisce? You're saying we as if you're
tied into this. Roll an insight check. Lu gives him a knowing look
and doesn't say anything else. 21. 21. Some of
the comments he made earlier about how he was
forced out of his normal job and his not exactly
enthusiasm about this seems like for the Simon
Husk Entertainment, it's he's got to put on
a show too or else it's his life on the line
as well. All right. Fuzz will nod. Right. Well,
I think we have a great introduction to the team
here. I hope the people at home watching are
excited to see... Insert the name here in post.
You're all lucky this part isn't being live edited.
Get that other guy to cooperate for when the
show actually starts or we're all in trouble. Got
it? Good. Nice to see you again. This is Dr.
Nuo Martin signing off. We'll see you at the
start of the games, folks. You see him breathe.
Relax. The persona kind of drops. Really, guys,
get your shit together. And then he just walks
out. I would like you a lot more if you just
talked like that normally. Yeah. Wow. It's a
big shift. Oh, man. All right. The two Husk
security droids that had come more recently fall
directly behind him. About like 30 seconds later,
the two that escorted Jackson out of the room
follow without Jackson in tow. Where did you
bring him? He's in his room, please. They just
leave. They put him in timeout. Timeout? What
is timeout? Timeout is like a thing that normally
you put a child in when they misbehave. Oh. I
didn't realize that Jackson was a spark. Well,
I think there are... I don't think Husk cares
about the age of people. I think it's whoever's
not listening. They'll put in timeout. Jackson,
at this point... They just kind of sat you down
roughly, encouraged you to stay down lest things
get a little more violent. As they left the room,
is there anything you would have liked to do?
Not that I have the equipment or capacity to
do right now, no. Okay. With that, you're either
free to come back into the common area, or if
you two would like to investigate and see what
happened to Jackson, you may make that move as
well. Well, they said he was in his room, so
should we check his room? Yeah, I think so. We'll
go to his room. Do they find you just kind of
sitting there seething on your bed? No, he's
pacing energetically. Do you think we are now
the underdogs? I don't know if we're going to
be so much the underdogs as the scrappy fringe
group. The alternative heroes. Ah, so we're gonna,
like, the teenagers are gonna be our demographic,
right? That's what our target audience? Oh, God.
Yep. All right. Speaking of which, that Nuo Martin
person said that you should come up with our
team name. We said Quio. Yeah, which I think.
Yeah. Again. It was the name that we most recently
had. Okay. Okay. And he wrote that down, did
he? No, he said you were better at it. Ah, okay.
Well. So, we are thieves. Thieves sounds common.
Brigands. Brigands is archaic. And also very
on the wrong side of the law. We need something
more- We are on the wrong side of the law. But
our image. We need our image to portray something
better. We need something more romantic. Something
more... Ooh, pirates. We're the pirates? But
pirates also has sort of a... Sort of a... Like
a dirty connotation. A reckless sort of bloodthirsty
sort of... Ah, pirates that were officially recognized
to do their work. By who? By the government.
Or in this case, possibly not the government,
more the good of the people. We're the Privateers.
Oh. Oh, okay. I mean, that sounds good. Sure.
All right. I mean, sounds good to me. I mean,
it sounds like... Privateers. Are there any specific
questions the three different Privateers have
based on their previous knowledge about the show?
What is our equipment situation? Are we given
any kind of basic stuff? Do we have our own equipment?
How much of our own equipment might we have?
Yeah. So right now... what's available to you
as you all kind of are in this common area with
different training supplies. You have what you
had with you on the Husk space station just about
a week or so ago. So I still have a high-frequency
blade on me? I would say anything that was obviously
a weapon has been taken away from you. Unless
it's kind of built into you, looking at Fuzz
specifically. All right. Also, a question off
of that. I had written down that we had like
a first aid kit, like from one of our... Do we
still have our first aid kits or no? Yes, I would
say that that was not taken off your body. It
wasn't deemed as threatening. With that in mind,
if there's nothing else specifically, within
the next couple days, so we'll say about day
five, so you got two days out from when you were
informed the computation would begin, you're
visited once again by Dr. Nuo Martin. The
Bots escort him in, but then leave him at the
entrance as he walks with you. All right, kids,
adults. Adults, not toys, adults. He's a big
boy. That he is. Right. Anyways, let's head to
y'all's quarters to have a quick conversation,
shall we? He will take you all to your sleeping
areas. We'll close the door behind him, and then
we'll tap something on his wrist. And, Lu, no
rolls from you. Can Fuzz and Jackson, roll,
we'll say, intelligence or constitution saving
throw, your choice. Is our hearing getting a
little funny? Not hearing. Potentially. We'll
see what happens with these rolls. DC 15. An
intelligence save, you say? Intelligence or constitution.
31. 31? Whoa! That's right. Your expertise.
Okay, intelligence save 19. 19. You both save.
For a second there, both of your vision starts
to blur for a little bit, and you kind of shake
it out of your head. You rolled intelligence,
correct? You also rolled intelligence. With intelligence
specifically, you also pick up the fact you're
not unfamiliar with a small EMP burst. It seems
like the electronics may have been powered down
in this room. The low-powered ones. Might have
affected your visual acuity, but you both saved.
Right. Okay. Now we can talk a little more plainly.
Just want to level set with you folks here. This
is an act. Y'all need to put on a show. And
from my understanding, you pull this off, we
all get to go home. Okay? Who are you? Dr. Nuo
Martin. The most fantastic, spectacular, galacticker
news host. Galacticker? I don't choose the taglines.
Okay. I read the teleprompter. Sure. Why are
you here? Because Simon Husk likes my voice, apparently.
This guy gets even worse. I can't. You think
this is worse? You're lucky y'all didn't wind
up on the Simon Says competition. I've heard
way worse things about that. Oh, I'm sure. All
right. So, going forward. We're going to need
a little cooperation. That's what I'm here for.
Fantastic, because there might be times when
we need to be, I don't know, quiet. Can you do
that? Over the next two days, I have some visiting
time scheduled where we're supposed to be talking
about interviews, getting that situated, because
you all got a little hot last time. I'm sorry.
And it had a lot of editing in the back end that
was a little laborious. So... They said if I
could go one-on-one without the threat of the
security Bots, it might be a little more meaningful
to talk to me. So over the next two days, I
can give you some time to talk in private. During
the show, no guarantees. I'm not going to be
out there on the field with you. Oh, okay. I'm
one of the shoutcasters. Okay, fantastic. Because
the way you made it sound like you were going
to be tagging along with us, and I was like,
we are not going to be able to sneak anywhere
with this man. No, no, no. You do not want me
out on that field. Hey, look, we're agreeing
on things already. I am a doctor in journalism.
Doctor. I studied. They're giving degrees to
anybody nowadays. Hey, hey, hey. All right. I
think also you should know that our last, well,
the last person who was telling us what to do
in a sort of situation similar to this. He betrayed
us, and we are perhaps not ready to trust anyone
new. One, not telling you what to do. Recommendation.
That's a great story angle to lean into. No.
Okay, we will not lean into that story angle.
Understood. Noted. Thank you. But I'm going to
give you all a little rundown, at least what
the first challenge is expected. I know where
we're headed towards, and I can estimate what
it might look like based on that. Who's here
familiar with Hastinir? And all of you can go
ahead and roll me a history check. 20. 20, nice
roll. 16. 16? I'm pretty sure he was the head
of the NRA, wasn't he? Hastinir, wait. Was that
a nat one? Yes, that was a big nat one. Lu,
you're the only one who makes the DC20, and it
makes sense just given how long you've been around
and how much of the galaxy you've seen. Hastinir
is part of a system that, unfortunately, the
sun is, well, you think it's beautiful, extremely
bright, extremely powerful, spreads its light
and warmth throughout that solar system extremely.
That has led to very hot temperatures on the
different planets within that solar system, to
the point where the first few, completely uninhabitable,
nothing can really survive there. Mostly just
either hot gases that would instantly vaporize
anything that goes near them, and then even the
planets on the outside have large tectonic activity
and volcanic activity. So it's a solar system?
Hastanir is a planet in the solar system. Oh,
okay. Hastanir is one of the only ones where,
feasibly, somebody could spend a little bit of
time, but still a large amount of volcanic activity,
a lot of lava lakes and similar hazards of that
nature. So just... What are we... We're going
to Hastanir? That's what's on my... what they
booked my travel for. So, yeah, that appears
to be the case. Problem? You seem concerned.
Well, mostly because I think both of you would
instantly melt if we take the wrong step. Oh,
well, that's good. There's a lot of volcanic
activity on those planets, on that planet. And
really, any of the other planets in the system
are basically uninhabitable. Where does this
guy get these ideas from? My God. All right,
first things first, we want to get the high ground.
Trust me, I know what I'm talking about. That
was Daniel. Not a bad idea. Yeah. Get as high
up above. Again, if you're headed there, looks
like that might be the obstacle course. Something
tied to running through a bunch of lava. No problem.
Right? Right. Okay. Good. Y'all looking excited.
You know I'm made out of plastic, right? I mean,
you survived this long. Largely by avoiding lava.
First time for anything. All right. Okay. All
right. How lava-proof are Stellars? You feel
as if, again, it wouldn't be so much the temperature
that's an issue. It's just bright light. If you're
immersed in that bright light, you're going to
lose your sense of self. Gotcha. Yeah. So that's
the danger of being submerged in the lava for
you. Gotcha. These two, as you mentioned, very
much is the melty part of it. Great. So an obstacle
course on a lava-ridden planet. Sounds like
a hot show, am I right? I'm going to punch you.
I don't write my scripts either. I'm sorry. That's
probably a good thing. No. Yeah. I'm sorry. I
have the distinct urge to punch you every time
you open your mouth. You're not the first person
to say that. Oh, I was going to say you're not
the first person he said that to. Oh. So good
company, I suppose. It's a small galaxy. What?
All right. Stop it with the small talk. I'm sorry.
Look, I'm not here to be a therapist. Look, time's
running a little short here. The interview was
only supposed to go for like 30 minutes. We're
going to have to make this up pretty fast. What
are we supposed to be answering? Oh, I have something.
Just tell him that I'm from Earth. Is that true?
The original one. The original one. I knew the
original Simon Husk. Well, now that's a story.
All right, let's get the tapes rolling. And he'll
tap his wrist. And there'll be a quick interview
piece just about specifically highlighting Fuzz
today. Your history, where you come from. Yeah,
I used to be best friends with the original Simon
Husk. You know, I haven't seen him in a few years
and all I want is to be able to say hi to him
again. Go ahead and roll me a charisma skill
check of your choice there. Deception or persuasion or performance.
Oh, well, it's all plus zero. So here we go.
Do you want to use any tricks of the trade? I
am going to use I read the manual because I can
gain expertise in a skill for an hour. I don't
get it. Got that one. I failed that one. Okay.
Do you want to call it? No, I'm not going to
call this one. I'm going to ask you every time
you guys. All right. So I don't get that one,
but I can just, I roll for the skill anyway.
Yes. Okay. All right. I am going to use a flashback.
Okay. So I get a 17. 17. Yeah. Nuo Martin seems
to give you like nods as you're going through
kind of signaling. It seems like a good interview.
He thinks it's going to sell well. It'll play
well to the audience. So good job there. All
right. Got two more days. Tomorrow, you two decide
which one of you you want me to interview next,
and then we'll get the last person on the last
day, and we can have a little more talk. Try
to get some more information about exactly what
the competition's going to be looking for on
the first day and what you might be able to bring
with you. Also, we are now called the Privateers.
Privateers. Okay. Okay, okay. Excellent. That's
a much better name than Quio. Why? Quio, I
thought, was really cool. No, it kind of sticks
oddly in the ear. It's not going to play well.
Trust me. All right. I'm in the industry. Okay.
I'm in the industry. I'm going to... I'm not
paid to be your therapist. They don't pay me.
And then he just leaves. That sounds right. All
right. Yeah, Jackson. Lava. This is going to
be an issue. Yeah, I think so. Agreed. I'm so
sorry if I got... I don't know. I don't normally...
Hot under the collar? All right, Jackson. You
don't normally get hot under the collar? Okay,
all right. I don't need any of this. I'm just
saying. It keeps you young. Yeah, and I'm very
young. I'm very young. Are you? Is that young
for a toy? A thousand years? Yes. Okay. So you
are both Sparks? Yeah. Sure, we'll go with that.
Oh. I mean, comparatively, actually, I am, yes.
I will change my behavior accordingly. No, don't
change your behavior. It's great. Your behavior
is great. It's good. We need... Anyway. Anyway.
It's just this interview. Sorry. I threw that
in there just to get him out the door. I was
getting... The longer that man opens his mouth,
I don't know. It just angers me. I think that
may be a common factor for you. All right. I
don't know. It's just like how much... If this
is what the TV show or the show actually is,
how many people have been kind of exploited and
what were their stories, you know? Oh, how many
people are in every season? That's a great question.
So normally it'll be multiple teams, both Fuzz
and Jackson, you would know this. You remember
being just about ranging anywhere from 10 to
the largest season with the most amount of people
per team was 20. It was four teams of five people
each. Okay. So 10 to 20 people per season. 50th
season. 50th season. It's going to be big. So
500 to 1 ,000 people's lives have been affected
that way? Yeah. And how many have been on the
wrong side of Husk Security? Again, this... At
this point, we just assume they all have, right?
Well, at least from the picture that was painted
on the screen, not so much. They gave the impression
that these were... people very happy with their
lives but looking for a sense of adventure. It
was more so oh we want to escape the monotony
of our daily lives and get to explore the beautiful
galaxy that the Husk corporation has provided.
Okay. Do we continue to give that performance
or do we give a new performance? What do you think?
i think if we give two drastically different
performance a lot of it's going to get lost in
edit. Yeah that makes sense huh all right Interesting.
Interesting. I will just chime in. As far as
you've been made aware, everything leading up
to the race is being edited and actually will
be cut down a little bit. But as far as they've
said, the show itself, once the competition is
underway, should be live streamed from what you've
been told. I trust that about as far as Fuzz
could throw me. That could be, you know, pretty,
pretty dang far from my standards. All in scale
all in scale. Yeah um this is not great. Not to
disparage the Lieutenant but i think uh an extended
Hey-Yo Silver would not be a terrible idea just
because I'm not sure how your boots are gonna
do in contact with stone that's in proximity
to lava. I can also fly too. But I'm not going
to be super as fast as you. And how are your
feet going to do well? I would have to assume
that they would be giving us at least protective
footwear if they're going to be having us traverse
this environment. Then why would they not give
Fuzz protective footwear? Because he is a difficult
size to fit. Also, I think you might be giving
them a little bit too much credit. I think part
of the game might be that you don't get productive
footwear. And if we have to acquire it, then
it will be substantially easier to acquire something
for my build than Fuzz. Also, that will free
you up to be paying attention. Yeah. Because
I am very good at reading people. I am terrible
at reading situations. You two are much better
at paying attention to what's going on in
the environment. Okay. So i'm going to be leaning
on you a lot for that. All right. Let's hope that
we don't come up with anything that we need like
brute strength with because i don't think anybody,
any of us can do that. Yeah yeah. All right. for
the next two interviews what are we going to
discuss? i think i um... You've done yours. I've done
mine which is just like I'm looking for my long
lost friend That was a loud eye roll. Yeah, sorry.
I should have said I roll my eyes. It was very
loud. It came across. Maybe, Lu, you, I don't
know, why did you join the crew in the first
place? Like our crew in the first place. Because
your passion is intoxicating. Right. All of you.
Then maybe you wanted to be part of this because
there's so much passion for the TV show if we're
going with that angle. All right. I can do that.
You all know I love to talk about my studies.
So I think I might just, you know, reference
some of the ancient works that I studied back
when I was in academia. Invigorating tales about
people going on adventures, people from unfortunate
circumstances that were trying to rise up to
be something greater. Okay. Going to lay a little
quiet allegory in. All right. Great, so we got
this. Okay, good. This is good, but do we need
to throw anything else in to make it a little
spicier? I don't know. To make us more of the
underdogs or more of the scrappy? Or do we already
do that? You would know better than I. Oh, hey.
Come on, Lieutenant. You always know that a team
that's doing this for somebody has automatically
got a leg up with the public. That's true. And
if we tell the public that Soup is in danger
somehow... We're just here to help Soup, that's
all. A friend soup. We've lost our friend Soup.
We don't know where they are. Or they're very
ill. Very ill. What do you win for winning this
thing? What happens? Our lives. But not publicly.
What does the public think? In past episodes,
it's been either an extravagant vacation package
or a large cash prize. If it's a cash prize,
then we could win the money to get the healing
help that our friend needs. If it's a large vacation,
then that will help cheer him up from... Maybe
we don't go too specific. We just have a sick
friend that we want to help out. Here's the thing.
It sounded like when Kessel was initially spinning
his line of bullshit to us that Soup was going
to be pulled away for leverage to make sure we
competed in this and got in the first task. Because
I have a feeling once we're in it, we don't have
a way out. That's true. So if they're going to
give Soup back. Why don't we push for that? If
we create a leverage situation that we're doing
this, we want to get through this task so we
can get our teammate back to us. Yeah. Then if
they don't give Soup back, then that will signal
something to the audience that something's not
quite right with the show. We were supposed to
be a team of four, but one of our teammates got
held up with. some kind of Husk paperwork so
we're just gonna soldier on and try to get through
the first task and hopefully Soup will come back
to us. Yeah that's good that way there's maybe
a little bit of a public we can get a little
public outcry. Yeah i like it. All right. And then
everyone's like who's Soup? And you know uh why
are they so mysterious in the background you
know right? Soup is very mysterious yes. Well all
right maybe they should never meet Soup. Bring
in an actor to play Soup. Yeah, we'll bring in
an actor. Soup instantly, hi, I'm Soup. All right,
sounds like we have a solid plan. So, Lu. Jackson,
is there an order you would like over the next
few days? Who should go first and who's going
to be the last interview before? I think Lu
should go first because theirs is not going to
be a great interview. So, we'll maybe sandwich
it in the middle. You might be surprised. We'll
see how you do. So we'll go ahead then, unless
there's anything pressing you all would like
to do this evening before the next day. Just
a quick, during these interviews, are we going
to be in the same room or is it individual? Like,
could I flashback it or no? So you've all been
in the same room. Okay. So yes, it seems like
you'd be able to help out. And again, if things
go exactly how they went today, it seems like
Nuo has had the ability to like, say, we can
do this off camera from the outside and it'll
just be me recording easier to control them quote
unquote that way- Can i also do one other thing?
I'm so sorry everyone. Before this can I,,, Each
day, I'm going to use before you interview, I'm
going to try and use do I Read the Manual to
give um some expertise or triple okay is that
okay? That's great okay. Uh so yeah we'll move
on to the next day go ahead and roll that at
the start of the day. Uh yeah that's a 26 that
succeeds Yeah, that took me from a zero to a
plus four. Okay, great. Amazing. Cool. Okay.
So the next day we'll arrive, same situation.
Nuo will take you back into your room to talk.
He'll also have, before the interview starts,
a bit of an update. All right. I was able to
work out some things. I saw what's kind of happening.
Tomorrow you're going to have a requisition list.
You can ask for some basic materials that if
you're used to functioning with. To a limit.
I don't know what that is. That's up to their
judgment. So maybe try not to get too wild with
your requests. Or maybe go very wild so that
we can be sure that we at least get the simplest
things on our list. Whatever feels like the right
strategy for you all, you decide. Yeah. They
don't want you apparently going into a lava planet
completely unawares, luckily. That's surprising.
They still want to show. They don't want you
to instantly fall into a pit of lava and die.
Not great for views on episode one. Real short
show. Yeah. With that in mind. From my understanding,
you'll be kitted out with something that will
protect you somewhat from the environment, but
hazards do happen, and apparently they're willing
to be a little less PG for this season. It seems
like, from the whispers I'm getting, maybe not
everybody in this show is as clean as they have
been in the past, and so they don't mind if things
go a little south. Okay, well, it's good to know
for us. Is that good for us to know that they're
ready to sacrifice us? Well, it's good that we're
not going in knowing that we're fighting people
who are so excited to be part of the show. You
know what I mean? Well, it's also good to...
We have to fight them? I assume. That might become
a situation eventually if we were both trying
to traverse maybe the same bridge or something
like that. And we just push them into the lava?
I don't know if we have to go that far. Again,
we're going to killing real fast. But they may.
Something Soup would have asked. Exactly. But they may.
Yes. Oh, right. If we know that they're all desperate,
then we know that there are certain lengths that
they might be willing to go to. So we should
be prepared for that. I'm not taking killing
off the table. But we still, I think, all got
into this for... generally noble intentions.
Let's not become the assholes. With that in mind,
one thing I want to highlight, again, by the
rumors I'm getting, they have asked me to kind
of tailor these interviews now going forward.
Fuzz, they were okay with yours. It seems like
they're not going to beautify this as much in
previous seasons. It is going to be known you
are all being forced into this because of crimes
against the Husk Corporation. You're kind of
being used as an example, but if you want to
try to tailor it, That what you have all done
in the past was for a good cause. Now would be
the time. All right. So that's all I got for
you. Like I said, hopefully they get the requisition
slip to you tomorrow. Anything you want to ask
me that I can try to trace down, see if anybody
in my connections might know something. I can
try to hunt down something for you. Again, you
all do good. I get to go home. I want to see
you all win. All right. Well, we'll do our best.
We have to think of what we might need, so. All
right, we can talk about that tomorrow. I mean,
if you can keep an update on our friend Soup.
That would be good. Somebody who used to run
around in your gang? Yeah, they're... We're not
a gang. They mentioned something like that to
me. I don't know, the Privateers? Yes, they used
to be one of the Quio. Yeah, yep. All the flubs
to just continue the entire show. I'll see what
I can find out about him. I've heard vaguely
you kind of are in a leverage situation here,
so I'll see what I can find out. All right. If
there's nothing else, who's up next for the interviews?
That would be me. Let's get right to it. All
right. Brightness, what would you like to talk
about? We are going to discuss why I joined the
Privateers. And why was that? I had been bouncing throughout
this galaxy for many millennia. And I had watched
it, in the past thousand years, deteriorate from
a beautiful, flourishing solar system and galaxy
to what it is now, under the Simon Husk Corporation
control. It is dismal. There is nothing worth
shining light on. Until one day, I came upon
this group. I saw their passion and I saw their
determination to bring some life back into this
galaxy. And I wanted to join them and help them
so that I could shine my light on it. So is there
like a creed that the Privateers go by or something
personal to you? No, this is something personal
to me. None of them shine light, so I don't think
that they're particularly looking to do that.
Shining a light on a better tomorrow. That is
a definite angle we can work with here. Okay,
go ahead and roll me a charisma check of your
choice. Assuming persuasion, because that's what
the bonus you got. Flashback. You get a plus
five to that as well. 27. Oh my gosh. I think
we can definitely work with this. Definitely
good angle. Might have to edit down a little
bit about the criticism there. I don't know if
they'll let that fly per se, but I think there's
a way I can angle that. Yeah. Yeah, this is good.
This is good. Keep that in mind for tomorrow.
Jackson. Jackson. All right. Sounds good. Any
other questions before I leave? I don't have
any. Sounds great. Final interview tomorrow.
Rest up. Get ready. Because Dr. Nuo Martin
is ready to present the next winners of the Amazing
Space Race. You know, I like you a lot more-
Have a good night, folks. All right. Anything
else for the day? Or should we move straight
into... We should start... We should figure out
our requisition list. Yeah. What we're going
to need. All right. So what will be on that requisition
list? Maybe we could get some rope. Yeah, I think
that's good. I want ball bearings. Yeah. And
we'll need... Don't just say yeah to that. Okay.
Okay. I'm going to bring the stale marshmallows
with me. Good idea. Good idea. They melt. They
melt. They'll melt on the lava planet. No, no,
no. That's a real thing. We're doing the marshmallows.
Okay. We have plans. We also... We're going to
need a clipboard. Hang on, hang on. I got to
go back to that. You have plans? Is this in your...
journal of combo things is marshmallows? Not yet
but we should get that on there. Yeah i told you
it was a living document. What is it gonna be
called the stay puff? Don't don't even try to
steal our names Matthew. Um okay and uh can we get an
alchemist jug? I mean you can ask. Yeah let's ask
for it and then a flashlight. We need a clipboard.
We need um... We need a backpack with two pairs
of sunglasses, like good quality sunglasses.
And the sunglasses case. In their cases. They
need to be in cases. Okay, you can make that
note underneath. A disguise kit, Jackson? Or
at least sufficient makeup that I am camera ready.
Okay, okay, okay. Let's ask for some bigger things
that they might not give us, like knives, blades.
Knives, blades. Something that could use to be
to cut rope or to cut other things. Flares.
Small time explosives, yeah. And if maybe like
a bottle of alcohol. Like what would be like
a healer's kit kind of thing? Like rum. Yeah.
Okay, like you want to get drunk on the show?
We are privateers. We have an image to uphold.
That's right. Thank you, sir. Rum, please. I
mean, if they want to give us a healer's kit,
they can certainly give us multiple healer's
kits. But we can't carry around a keg of rum.
So we need it in bottles, please. Glass. And
multiple bottles is fine. One per person is fine.
And if they want to give us Soup back, that would
be great. Oh, yeah. I'm sure they're totally
willing to do that. Yeah, sure. You can write
that down. Pitons, in case we have to climb.
Oh, like the things that stick in the rock? Crayons?
Do we say crayons? Oh, we need crayons. Definitely.
What do you mean did we say crayon? It rhymed
with pitons. We wanted to make sure we didn't
get confused. Keep up. Can we also have fireworks?
I would also like fireworks. You could put flares
slash fireworks and see what you get. And I would
also like the equivalent of a maybe 20 sheets
of paper on the clipboard so I can take notes
as we go. And a pen. Clipboard, pen, and paper.
Like a fireproof pen. But not fireproof paper.
I just want to let you know, again, I haven't
been able to see this combo list that they have
going on. I'm trying to figure out what the hell
you pull off with a clipboard and crayons. Was
it always fireproof or is it just because it's
a lot of time? Just now. Sometimes you have to
improvise. It's the heart and soul of being a
criminal. You adapt. Okay. Anything else you
want to add to that? Wait, did we say mirrors?
We need five mirrors. I don't think I wrote down
mirrors. Five? Five of them. Five. Okay. They
don't have to be big. Like small handheld. Okay.
Are we talking like compact? Like a makeup compact
mirror? Yeah, that'd be fine. Okay. But sized
for Jackson, not for Fuzz. Okay, yeah. Because
then that would be... Yeah, we'll just have a
little shark glass. All right. Or like a dentist.
It would be like a staff for me. We need one
of those, actually. Four mirrors, one. We're
also, along with the toothpicks and marshmallows,
we're taking out of the kitchen here. They don't
give them to us. We're going to take them out
of the kitchen. We're going to take any twist
ties and empty plastic bags that are in there,
too. If we've got to dump out the bread from
inside, we're going to take that plastic bag.
Okay. Okay. All right. plastic bags... bread ties.
Okay. They want a show they're getting a show.
Oh we're all getting a show right now. Okay, got
it. Anything else? Again I'm not guaranteeing everything's
gonna go here. I might make some rolls and there
are a couple things just instantly i know you're
not. The twist ties? It's fine. We're going to
steal them from the house. No, I don't think
so. I think I would just prepare to do I Read
the Manual again before Jackson's interview.
Okay. Yeah. So we'll get that ready for tomorrow.
For the end of the day, with this requisition
list, since you're putting it together tonight
and we'll be handing it in tomorrow, all three
of you go ahead and make luck checks for me.
You want above tens here. So just a flat D20.
15. One. One. Nat 20. Okay. So that's going to
counteract the natural one. And we'll just count
those as two moderate successes. Plus, what was
yours again, Fuzz? 15. 15. And a decent success
there. Okay. Sounds good. I will work on what
you all get for the upcoming competition. But
we'll go ahead and move into the next day then.
Day of Jackson's interview. Same situation sets
up. What Nuo is able to inform you all is, unfortunately,
he doesn't have much of an update in terms of
the competition. What he does know about Soup
is just he's heard that there is currently a
prisoner kind of, quote unquote, like as a guest
of honor being watched very carefully by Husk
himself and his own personal security detail.
Guest of honor, my ass. You're able to think
of that what you will. All right. So, Jackson,
you said, what angle are we shooting here for
your interview? So we want to spotlight the beauty,
and this group is doing that. We got, pardon
me, not trying to offend Lieutenant, the toy
looking for his friend. Yeah, all right. All
right. Okay? Okay? That's what you said, not
me. Yeah. You just said it. Don't try to have
him attack me. Please. Lu just shrugs. And echoing
great stories of adventure of the past. Okay,
okay. I'm a fan of some classic stories. Sure,
what do you got? Oh, are we doing rolls here
for anything? Yeah, I rolled a 14 plus 13 for
my manual. What skill did you choose? And I would
say you two could have conversed beforehand.
Is there one that you would have preferred? I
mean, I am very good at... I'm proficient in
persuasion. I have expertise in deception. Performance
I'm not great at, but if we're going to go with
persuasion, then... You would upgrade him to
expertise. Yeah, let's go persuasion. Grand.
And I am... Before Jackson does this, he's going
to be looking down the barrel into the camera.
okay for this interview and I'm gonna make an
attempt to activate charming personality. Oh. As
a trick of the trade, charm a target, the viewer,
for one hour so I'm gonna try to charm viewers
of this for an hour so they get a warm fuzzy.
Yeah I don't think i specified target that you
can see um so i think that's on me. Um hey Folks,
just be careful when you homebrew abilities. Yeah,
that flies. Could bite you in the butt. It's
a PSA for you. Oh, yeah, that's a 21. Looking
for a 15. Yeah, that succeeds. All right. Grand.
The grand audience at home is now charmed by
you for this interview. So you are going, excuse
me, you're going to have advantage on whatever
charisma checks you do or really any check you
use to interact with them socially. Great. So,
Doctor, let me tell you a story. Years ago, I
was an academic. I was a... teacher of uh neoclassical
uh serialized heroic fiction. You know the the
stories back from from a thousand years ago in
the Milky Way. Things that families would gather
together and watch every week or sometimes would
sit down and watch a marathon of of stories centered
around different groups of heroes and looking
at really all of the the structural similarities
and themes that were in them. You know, rising
up against oppression the little guy becoming
greater than their than their beginnings and
it was fascinating because there were certain
There were certain storytellers, actors that
were in a number of these that, you know, crossed
genres. There was a there was a great Austrian
actor that was just like massive of stature and
massive of personality and talent. And while
he played bit parts in a few of the serialized
dramas about a group that was easy to they were
older so they were easy to throw away out of
society looking back into his earlier canon he
played a great barbaric hero that had a few films
and and there was even one where he was he was
a law officer wrongfully accused, who had to
fight on a game show for his very life. He was
a man just running and running. And it's those
inspiring tales that, you know, we want to see
that sense of adventure, that sense of spirit
from, I think, all of the competitors that we're
going to be going up against. We want to see
them all run. Yes, Lu. Yes. I like it. Run towards
the future, towards a brighter tomorrow. Oh,
I really like that. Going towards a better tomorrow.
All right. I think we got our tagline, folks.
That was an amazing thing. I think I got about
half the references. I think I got them all,
which I might be slightly ashamed about. It's
hard to turn down a good Schwarzenegger film.
I think we should have a Jackson bingo card.
We need an Evan bingo card. It goes across all
the different shows. Yes, so go ahead and then
roll me, I believe you said persuasion? Yes.
So you can roll that at advantage. All right,
so that is with a plus 12. That is a nat 20.
Plus 12. Plus flashback. You get another plus
five. Okay, that is a 37. Holy shit. That 20,
37. Everyone loves us. We may not be the underdogs
anymore. With that running towards a brighter
tomorrow, you see Nuo Martin just kind of
like lean down, pull out a handkerchief from
inside a coat pocket. dab at the corners of his
eyes. It's just like, we are going to make great
television. Every week, people will be tuning
in to see serialized heroics. Oh, should that
have been our name? No, no. I mean, you could
have worked on a brand deal with different series.
Anyways, beyond the point. Sounds great. Love
that. Love you all. I'll turn in the requisition
slip. Anything else? No. Doesn't sound like it.
All right. Good luck. Good night. We'll see you
tomorrow. All right. Fantastic. Do you think
we're going to get the twist ties? I sure hope
so. The best part is I have this list. I don't
know what's important. So I can't even like metagame
and be like, oh, they really like no way can
I let them have the plastic bag, that'll ruin
me. I think we are really embracing the idea
of insanity where it's like, if we don't know
what we're going to do, they can't know. Yeah.
It's working on Matt, the DM. That's for sure.
Good. Well, with that, they're going to start
adding together these intros. You all go to bed,
have as restful as the night as you can. And
we wake up the day of the competition. Go ahead.
And we'll do again. We'll do constitution saving
throws to see the waking order here. 19 con save.
Amazing. That's a big old 8 from Jackson. Yeah,
you wanted to sleep in. I'm frail. Also an 8.
Oh, yeah, both a little tired. Fuzz, you're the
first one to awaken, at least from the clock
on the wall. It says it's pretty bright and early
at 6 a .m. And Husk security Bots march in immediately.
The noise is impossible to sleep through. The
whirring of servos and machinery. Not overly
aggressive, but not too kind either. You all
are restrained in some way. And for a lack of
a better term, a high-tech version of a bag
is placed over your head that completely interrupts
your sight. Go ahead, the two technology people,
roll me technology checks. Natural one. Okay.
Twisted 20. You're having a little bit of a tough
time. You're a little upset that they had a bag.
this small ready for you. Yeah, where'd you guys
get this small bag? It's not a small bag. What
am I saying? Where did they get it? An individual
die purchase. True. We've all got them. You hear
a faint buzzing sound and your internal mechanical
mechanisms are essentially short-circuiting.
It's something that's cutting both your hearing
and your eyesight. My face just fell asleep.
Yeah. Essentially. Oh, I don't like that. At
all. So, Fuzz, both of you are, all three of
you are essentially under the incapacitated status
effect. Completely unaware of your outside surroundings.
You're vaguely aware that you are being forced
to walk in a direction. It takes some time before
you're roughly seated down somewhere. And it's
quite a bit of time of travel. As far as you
know, it's hard to tell for sure. You aren't aware
of any conversation happening outside. You are
slightly aware of temperature changes, feeling
of breeze on your skin for a little bit, and then
completely still air. And it's as far as you can
tell with the time distorted because of your
lack of sensory perception, hours. So after multiple
hours eventually you feel the sudden jolt of
inertia shake you as wherever you were on comes
to a sudden stop. You are pushed again outside.
You feel that and then immediately you're hit
with a blast of heat. That is uncomfortable.
You feel hands push against your back and then
they're suddenly taken away. Another couple minutes
go by and all of a sudden your senses return
to you. For the most part. There's still a bag
over your head. What would you all like to do?
Lieutenant? Yeah, I'm here. Lu? I'm here. Soup?
I have to try. They were on our list. The bags
are not secured by anything, so you feel like
you're free to remove them at any time. Are our
hands restrained at all? No. Okay, let's get
that off. Yeah, bag off. You take it off. Everybody
go ahead and roll me perception checks. 18. 18.
Twisted 20. Amazing. Twisted 20. 25. 25. Wow.
All right. Hopefully these rolls continue. What
you're all welcomed with. It's... Beautiful in
its danger. You are all seated on a rocky alcove
overlooking a steep drop. And before you is essentially
two giant walls of lava on either side, your
left and right, and a patchwork path. Path is
exaggerating a little bit. Of floating stone leading
out in front of you. Far off in the distance,
with the 25, Lu, you're the only one who could
spot it. You see something blowing in the wind.
Maybe a thousand feet. I think there might be
some sort of flag out there. Are we, uh... Has
this started? Where's our stuff? We didn't get
the twist ties. Looking down at your feet now,
after taking in the, uh, gigantic... landscape
in front of you, you notice three packs, one
seated each at your feet. Each of you, make sure
you're writing this down, has 20 feet of rope,
a set of 50 ball bearings, makeup kits for each
of you, and I will say if you put those together,
they would actually function as a full disguise
kit. Each of you has a mirror. Oh, wait, no,
no, wait, okay. The makeup kit, does it have
a mirror on it, or is it a mirror? It's literally
just like... Okay. Yeah. Foundation and different
kits like that. They did not give you a compact
with a mirror. How did they expect us to look
pretty without being able to see ourselves? They
give you hand -sized mirrors, and these are normal
hand-sized mirrors, so it's pretty big compared
to you Fuzz. All right. But I don't know if that makes
you feel better or worse. Each of you has a pack
of crayons. There's a clipboard. Each of you
has sunglasses in a case. Wow. Lu has sunglasses.
They are going to wear them all the time now.
Mine are Barbie sunglasses. And each of you has
a clipboard. Yeah. They did not provide you alcohol,
blades, alchemist jugs. I mean, asking for a
magic item. That was pretty. That was ballsy.
You know, somehow you get the feeling somebody
respected the chutzpah. Did we get paper with
the clipboard or no? Yes, it does have paper
on it. Oh, and it does have, each of them has
a pen tucked in. You don't know if it's heat
resistant. I sure hope so. We didn't get pitons?
Nope, no pitons. A flashlight? No flashlight.
All right. The fools, they fell for our traps.
Can I roll to see if we were able to smuggle
the marshmallows, the toothpicks, the twist ties,
and plastic bags out of the... Yeah. So, hang
on. It's plastic bags, twist ties, and marshmallows,
right? Three things? And toothpicks. Toothpicks?
Okay. Yeah. Let's go ahead. Each of you roll
me a sleight of hand check, or somebody can designate
to give somebody else the help action, and they'll
be rolling for multiple hands. I'm pretty good
at sleight of hand. Slight of hand is a physical
check, so I can give you advantage anyway. Okay,
cool. Oh, yeah, it's a bonus action, so you could
still also make your own roll. Okay. And this
would have been done yesterday, I'm assuming,
so you could also use any tricks of the trade
if you wanted to beforehand and have your full
point repertoire today. I'm going to do... I
Read the Manual just because I can because it
was yesterday. That's a 32, so I would... Wow.
This is... I now have... Triple your... Triple
my proficiency, so this is a plus 12. plus 3,
so this is a plus 15. Okay, good, because I did
not roll well. That is a... I'm going to flashback
that, so that's a 35. 35, okay. Lu? 11. 11.
26. 26. Okay. With a 35, you can choose any two
of the items listed, and Jackson, you can choose
one of those. I'm going to choose marshmallows.
And I am going to choose... I think twist ties.
I'm upset you didn't choose the toothpicks and
just bring your dumbbells. I know. And I'm going
to go plastic bags. I feel like of the two. Okay.
The toothpicks are probably just going to catch
fire. I don't understand why we didn't get fireworks.
Yes, you also did not get fireworks or flares.
I guess they don't want a show. All right. Did
we get a backpack? So you have the bags that
were contained in there. Not like a full duffel
bag, but these were contained in a backpack of
sorts. Great. That plan, I already know. You
revealed that to me in episode one. What do you
mean? Yeah. Jerks. I mean, my lovely players
who are so smart in so many ways. All right.
So Lu has pointed out the potential flag, maybe?
Flag-ish thing in the distance. Who else is
here? Based on looking, especially with that
perception 25, you see what seems to be a singular
path in front of you, and everything else around
you is basically just a lava river. You see no
other competitors, no other features. Oh, we're
probably all equidistant and are running to a
center. All right, let's do it. We've got to
get there. Do... Do either of you feel like you
could make it with a Catch Me if You Can or a
Quick on Your Feet or something? Oh, I could
probably land a... I can do a Catch Me if You
Can. Yeah. Alrighty. I think we should try. So,
as you all are considering this, funnily enough,
somebody mentioned they don't want to show fireworks
lighting up in the sky. They gave them to someone
else? They took that idea. That's awful. Ladies
and gentlemen, you're tuning in to Stream 7.
That's right, your lovely host for today is Dr.
Newell Martin, and we are following the Privateers.
Alrighty, folks, they're competing against five
other teams to be the fastest, the quickest,
the brightest, and the strongest in the entire
galaxy. Who's going to be winning the amazing
Space Race? Today's challenge, folks, it's a
dastardly, devilish, dangerous, delightful race
across a lava river to the ship in the center
that will take our contestants to the next challenge.
Only the first four teams to arrive will succeed
and proceed on. That final team is stranded here.
For the rest of their days. Suspenseful. Alrighty.
And with that folks. Count down with me. To the
start of the space race. Ten. Nine. Eight. Three.
Two. One. Blast off. And there. We will end and
we'll pick up next time. No. Also, what the fuck?
I know. You're just going to leave us here? Leave
us here. In the lava. I mean that tracks. All
righty, folks. We'll see what happens next time.
Have fun. Bye. Bye. What has Simon Husk done
with Soup? Will Husk really grant them their
freedom if they win the Space Race? Should the
Privateers trust Dr. Nuo Martin? Do they really
have a plan for the marshmallows? How are they
going to avoid being burnt to a crisp? I guess
you'll have to tune in for the next episode of
Grand Theft Galactic. Thank you for listening
to Grand Theft Galactic. With Daniel Begin as
Lieutenant Fuzz Sparkleday. Evan Kelly as Jackson.
Bo Powell as Lumen. And MattsTheLast as the
Game Master. Produced by Evan Kelley. Trope Warden,
Evan Kelley. Bo here. Thanks for listening. If
you're enjoying what you're hearing, consider
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