WEBVTT 00:00:00.759 --> 00:00:07.559 Joyeux anniversaire to us. I'm here, Paris. Staring 00:00:07.559 --> 00:00:10.080 at a blank page with a fatigue after moving from 00:00:10.080 --> 00:00:12.839 my Wimbledon flat onto a two-bed boat in Chelsea 00:00:12.839 --> 00:00:17.879 recently. Yeah, really. What did the universe 00:00:17.879 --> 00:00:23.800 see in me? I didn't get to rest in London. There 00:00:23.800 --> 00:00:25.940 was always something to do and sort out and I 00:00:25.940 --> 00:00:29.879 was happy to get it done. But as soon as I arrived 00:00:29.879 --> 00:00:32.939 in Paris and had my 11 p .m. snails at a local 00:00:32.939 --> 00:00:35.640 bistro filled with chatty neighbours, I love it, 00:00:35.740 --> 00:00:38.740 my body seemed to believe that it was now safe 00:00:38.740 --> 00:00:44.079 to shut down. It was a last-minute decision 00:00:44.079 --> 00:00:47.299 to spend my birthday here, thanks to my daughter 00:00:47.299 --> 00:00:49.759 once again for saying, "you should be in Paris" 00:00:49.759 --> 00:00:55.460 about 27 hours before. Quietly, as I like it. 00:00:56.719 --> 00:01:00.679 It was quiet and relaxing, with me managing to 00:01:00.679 --> 00:01:04.140 calm my excitable Jonny down all day, just about, 00:01:04.340 --> 00:01:07.599 and with him spoiling me by allowing me to do 00:01:07.599 --> 00:01:12.939 whatever I wanted, just like any other day. I 00:01:12.939 --> 00:01:15.959 ate one and three quarters pains au chocolat and 00:01:15.959 --> 00:01:19.019 one and a half croissants for breakfast. This 00:01:19.019 --> 00:01:21.120 is actually highly unusual, but a girl had a 00:01:21.120 --> 00:01:24.599 craving. Opened my wonderful presents. What is 00:01:24.599 --> 00:01:27.519 this, Christmas? And if the podcast today sounds 00:01:27.519 --> 00:01:30.700 cleaner and more professional, you know who to 00:01:30.700 --> 00:01:34.900 blame. Showered at three, picked up another present 00:01:34.900 --> 00:01:38.099 from a local vintage jewelry shop, took the metro 00:01:38.099 --> 00:01:41.599 across the city and had a lot of the best Tunisian 00:01:41.599 --> 00:01:44.739 lamb, couscous and tagine at Chez Hamadi near 00:01:44.739 --> 00:01:48.159 my first flat in Paris. Had a digestive walk 00:01:48.159 --> 00:01:51.299 along the river in the Latin Quarter. Went to 00:01:51.299 --> 00:01:54.500 Théâtre Bouffon in Jaurès to see a mask play in 00:01:54.500 --> 00:01:58.109 the evening. Dragged my drowsy body back home, 00:01:58.670 --> 00:02:01.349 left the champagne from the parents unopened 00:02:01.349 --> 00:02:06.670 in the fridge, and fell asleep. Apart from his 00:02:06.670 --> 00:02:10.430 constant restraint (by me) whispered screams of 00:02:10.550 --> 00:02:13.949 "happy birthday, baby!" he managed to make it feel 00:02:13.949 --> 00:02:16.409 like it was a normal day for me, so I might let 00:02:16.409 --> 00:02:20.590 him be around me for my next birthday. I can't 00:02:20.590 --> 00:02:23.110 do much about the presents, he randomly gets 00:02:23.110 --> 00:02:26.150 me those every now and then. And as for champagne, 00:02:26.370 --> 00:02:29.610 I trickle it down my throat whenever I want anyway. 00:02:31.150 --> 00:02:34.830 Wow. For someone who doesn't think it necessary 00:02:34.830 --> 00:02:37.590 to celebrate her own birthday, she had a lot 00:02:37.590 --> 00:02:44.050 to say about it. I'm just grateful, Paris. On 00:02:44.050 --> 00:02:46.449 the boat, I have created a tiny corner with a 00:02:46.449 --> 00:02:51.030 desk, a red Anglepoise lamp, a few cherished 00:02:51.030 --> 00:02:54.840 books (three of them my own) and a Freewrite 00:02:54.840 --> 00:02:58.300 Traveler, where the poet feels so at home for 00:02:58.300 --> 00:03:01.699 the first time in a very long time and has typed 00:03:01.699 --> 00:03:05.419 22 poems in Indonesian and English within three 00:03:05.419 --> 00:03:08.979 days in preparation for the republishing of my 00:03:08.979 --> 00:03:13.159 second book published 20 years ago. 44 to go 00:03:13.159 --> 00:03:15.580 and I haven't written a new one for a month. 00:03:16.060 --> 00:03:21.180 I'm not that prolific--you're welcome. Who cares 00:03:21.180 --> 00:03:24.139 about the boaty problems -- water supply, drainage, 00:03:24.580 --> 00:03:27.240 power trips, temps clippers passing and making 00:03:27.240 --> 00:03:30.180 waves -- when I can think loudly and peacefully 00:03:30.180 --> 00:03:33.680 in between getting my hands dirty, or wet, usually! 00:03:35.699 --> 00:03:40.020 I'm grateful that the kids are fine with my tentative 00:03:40.020 --> 00:03:44.360 life and have even promised, again, to do a sketch 00:03:44.360 --> 00:03:48.520 or a painting each as a present--what are artists 00:03:48.520 --> 00:03:53.340 like when being commissioned? I'm grateful for 00:03:53.340 --> 00:03:55.900 my friends old and new who have witnessed and are 00:03:55.900 --> 00:03:58.900 still witnessing my journey gracefully, having 00:03:58.900 --> 00:04:02.819 not been invited to my birthday party once. I'm 00:04:02.819 --> 00:04:05.759 grateful for my mildly annoying boyfriend who 00:04:05.759 --> 00:04:08.759 says he loves me every day and often proves it. 00:04:09.599 --> 00:04:14.500 Though mostly in my mind, I'm grateful that exactly 00:04:14.500 --> 00:04:17.920 one year after my return to you, we're still 00:04:17.920 --> 00:04:22.449 walking the cobbled streets together. Joyeux anniversaire, 00:04:22.449 --> 00:04:30.029 to us! Paris, le 2 octobre 2021. Je t 'embrasse.