Tough questions. Honest answers. Oh, the messy
truth. Your perspectives. Let's begin. Welcome
to Kaleidoscope. I'm so sad. Now we're back online.
Hi. Hi. Justin. Hello. Welcome. Thank you. Welcome
to the fifth episode of Kalareska. It's been
a long time in the making. It has been a long
time in the making. Thanks for reaching back
out to me. Thanks for having me. Yeah, I really
appreciate it. Tell us about yourself, Justin.
It's been busy. That's why I want to go back
to you now. So I've been preoccupied now finding
a new job. So that has just been achieved. Signing
the contract and be moving cities. of Suzhou
where I've been for the last five years where
he's on the Ningbo Ningbo Ningbo which is apparently
a very beautiful city as well yeah so yeah I've
never been there okay I have very very briefly
is it worth going I'm told it's very nice and
people like I know quite a few people who work
in Ningbo The recruiter had said to me, I've
got to let you know that the school itself is
quite far out. It's not in downtown. And maybe
that was supposed to be a deterrent, but that's
wonderful for me. I'm not too big into city life
and convenience, which I'll get into later as
my topic for today. Excellent. Yeah. What's been
happening? I don't like talking about my personal
life. No, no, no. No personal life. What do you
mean what's been happening? What's been happening?
I'm waiting to do this podcast. For weeks. The
most anxious. Today I am. I don't know where
all my stuff is. I lost all my notes. I think
I know where it is. Yeah, it's been a busy time.
So I've been looking forward to this as well.
Got the orchestra to attend this evening, which
will be really nice. Where's the orchestra? Right
here in Ginger Lake, the Sujo Mall. yeah i really
want to go as well yeah in the mall or it's natural
no no no of course it's a amphitheater that's
very near very near the mall so it's don't think
like cultural building the cultures they're in
moon hard next to boxing oh my god sorry guys
where i live right it's like another city i gotta
drive all the way up there i knew that you don't
go to bangkok like come on i mean If I had a
car maybe, it's just so much. It takes so long.
Too much effort. It's every two weeks and it's
well worth it if you get that relaxation from
the music and if you're into classical music,
yeah. Okay. What's been happening in my life?
I'm looking for new opportunities always. Continuing
this podcast. Yeah, this is this is the biggest
opportunity Yeah, I'm thinking about going to
Thailand and now two months till we see what's
up there You want to come where I might? I might
have to Nice. I might not have a choice. You've
been before never. Oh, I know you could yeah.
No, it's yeah, it's amazing. Okay We'll go to
Shanghai and then we'll go back home Well, I
give Bangkok a wide berth, but as I said, I'm
not a big city person Take your words for it.
All right Who's gonna go first today before we
start before I do this deal who's gonna go first?
Wait, let me I really want to see I really want
to check my notes. I think I wrote things down
I can't find them on my phone. I think I wrote
them in my my books This is Riverside, isn't
it cool? Very much so. If you're watching this
today, welcome to Kaleidoscope. We've started
using Riverside to record the podcast. It makes
everything much easier. It includes AI to make
editing easy. It automatically transcribes everything.
I think we can translate as well. If you like
it, if you want to record cool videos, or edit
long -form videos quickly. In the doobly -doo
is my link. It would help me out if you get it,
because I'm going to forget Riverside. So that's
going to be posted on, you're using that to record,
right? Riverside, you're going to be posting
it on your YouTube channel. Yes. But actually,
Riverside will also be doing all of the clips
and stuff that go onto TikTok and Instagram.
And it happens quickly, really quickly. We started
the first time with Luigi's Flame from the last
episode. Yeah, it just makes life so easy for
me. We're looking at like seven to eight hours
recording all the way down to 20 minutes. Wow,
that's a lot of time saved. You found it. Super!
whatever off the cuff we're doing this let's
go that's the way i rock man i'm so mad at so
many cool intro thingies all right stored them
in your yes queen noggin yep want to try hello
this is the episode or this is the podcast where
we ask um difficult questions pose interesting
perspectives and dive into those from everyday
people from anywhere in the world i'm I'm what
happens when a spreadsheet happens to think that
it has feelings, collides with a sci -fi glitch
and comes out as a queen. Welcome to Kaleidoscope.
I'm Justin and I'm a meat -coated skeleton hurting
through time and space. In my spare time, I save
kittens from trees. basically an all around nice
guy if you stop that if you stop that I said
kittens I would believe that but the treatment
the tree things too much yeah everyone I'm Luigi
and I have a I don't know how can I stand up
to this I have a strange fear of public gyms
and Fendi failed cynicism of other people's statements
about themselves. Yeah, 100%. Thanks for the
welcome. Thanks for having us here at RubyRubes.
Who is going to, who wants to go first today?
How serious is yours? Yours is pretty serious.
It's an Excel spreadsheet. I always wanted him.
You know, I was trying to make my little serious
start line harder. Well, I don't have anything
like hard to start with. Let me go. It's the
idea that simply put in two words, convenience
kills. So yeah, not too lighthearted either.
But the idea that especially where we are here
in China, it's just so easy to get everything.
delivered to you. It's your lifestyle is made
super convenient. But if there's ever a breakdown
in that chain, you know, like we had some time
ago in 2020 service delivery and food stops,
everything falls apart. You can say yeah. Yeah,
when that absolute clusterfuck happened. Yeah,
everyone was stuck with their finger up there.
They're proverbial because nobody knows how to
do anything for themselves. So convenience kills.
You think COVID made people less capable of things
because... No, no, no. Just they were shown,
like if there's that supply chain breakdown,
everyone goes and buys everything from the supermarket
or we just at the touch of a button get our coffee
delivered. When that wasn't able to happen due
to COVID, it highlighted how we could be stuck
up shit creek without a paddle. Because we're
so dependent. Yeah, on delivery. Do you think
people were not capable of going up to buy coffee
or, you know, whatever? Yeah, people don't even
cook anymore. Like you can just go to the supermarket
now to buy your own food to cook it. And so a
few people do that, because it's more convenient
to get delivered to you. Now, I think I don't
I don't know, I have to disagree. I mean, I agree
with what you're saying that people don't know
how to cook, or they don't cook. Now, I would
say that's very specific to where we are. I think
about this a lot, too. I just think because everything's
so affordable, let's say, yeah, China's really
easy. That's exactly the thing. Maybe cooking
doesn't happen for us, but I think of back home,
I think cooking is still a very common routine.
Maybe young Zoomers get all the... Order out
stuff to take out stuff. That's pre -made and
they yeah, they got money to spend baby. Sure
I've been cooking a lot because it's so terrible
No before losing weight, but okay, but I've also
just been enjoying eating a lot more and but
but I do get my groceries delivered to me sure
and I rarely go to buy them sometimes I do I
can say I I cook I would rather cook than order
out because I just want to know what I'm eating.
But, uh, yeah, I'm so lazy at half the time.
I'll just starve. I don't even want to walk down
the street to buy groceries. That's how lazy
I become. That's how convenient everything is
for me. But so, okay, wait, what's your point
again? That convenience kills. It's just too
easy to get takeout food. Yeah. What does it
count? You're sold. Well, yeah, we'll get around
to that. But also convenience in terms of all
the pre -made foods, like all of the chemicals
that are inside foods are super bad for you.
And of course, people, it takes just that bit
of effort to go shop for yourself. Even when
you're shopping, you're not sure what's in your
ingredients, but you've got to try and shop carefully
so that you can cook at home. And people are
like, oh, there's too much effort to go to the
supermarket. Oh, it's too much effort to cook.
So you're just people becoming more lazy. by
consuming all this pre -made food and while you're
losing the skills of cooking. I mean, some people
may not know how to cook in a little generations
time. So you're saying it's killing society?
Yeah, if you take it down to people giving their
kid an iPhone or a tablet to entertain them because
it's more convenient for the device to entertain
your child. then you're even losing that family
dynamic. So, yeah, it bleeds into everything.
OK, there's a lot going on here. So people are
losing their ability to cook and family home
time or whatever. Yeah. Ritual dinner is breaking
families apart because no one's having dinner
together and talking to their kids. Making us
up. So there are two very different things. But
they result from the same. But we have to we
have first we have to. systemic. Recognize where
we are though. Again, I keep coming back to this,
but you know, we are in China. I don't know,
do Chinese families sit down and have dinner
together every day? I used to. I think they do.
Is it less? But one thing that is true, yeah,
is cooking has become the purview of the grandma.
And it's not in China. In China. Yeah. And I
think that is also true for Thailand from an
experience there. Okay. And it was not true in
Western society. And I bring it back to you.
I used to live in Thailand. You're saying grandmas
in the West don't cook? No, no, they do. But
they cook much less for the nuclear family, because
here in China, they coalesce, they come together
after children are had. The parents often hand
those children over to the grandparents and the
grandma cooks and often the parents will come
home and they'll eat food that the grandma cooks.
That's not true for every family. Often it's
the mom and there's a lot of stay -at -home moms,
especially in our orbit because we work with
wealthier families in general. I think for their
less wealthy families, when both parents are
working, they either order in, or the grandma
cooks, or the grandpa, I don't know. Well, I
would argue that if push came to shove, families
would manage their time and cook, but this is
the culture for the grandparents' cassettes.
They do that. They do the cooking. But I also
think it's a newer culture. Because I think that
before, society was more structured in the way
that the traditional man works, breadwinner,
woman at home, housewife. And then parent and
kids come home after school. But now it's changed
to... Everybody's doing everything until like
9 p .m. Every night sure and What's happened
is that grandma is still cooking the meals the
same way she has for the past four years Fair
I think we need to focus What but why I I think
it's focused because the Okay, so are we talking
specifically about families? No, we're talking
about how convenience has Convenience was born
out of necessity in China. I think like everything
Necessity is the mother of invention. People
needed more convenient ways to get food because
they need to be working longer hours and doing
like why do we have Uber Eats because people
can't be fucked to go out and buy food. But and
that's killing society. And one thing that I
was thinking about this podcast, the other day,
I said it to someone or I described it as this.
It's the podcast where. That that calls back
to the time when people met in bars and had conversations
that blew their minds and then left. Yeah, yeah.
And that doesn't happen anymore because of convenience
and as a result of COVID, like those two things
together. But I'm still not sure exactly what
it kills. Exactly, Dan, you're right. Yeah, it's
still very nebulous. Convenience kills. Sounds
real cool. Should make a t -shirt. But kills
what exactly? Convenience is a killer. Yeah,
I was thinking about it like it's everything
from like I'd said from from food to the way
that we meet people is all online, but so we're
more connected, but we have less to say or we
feel isolated. That's another point of it. From
music, for example, you can get in touch with
any sort of music that you want, but there's
no genre that defines the entire age anymore.
So I don't know, as a as an old timey person,
when I say kills, maybe it's just getting the
way of life that I'm accustomed to. We're just
so old, we don't pay attention to what's happening.
Yeah, youngins, because I think, you know, things
still, there's still like dynamic things in life,
like genres of music and sacred stone. But yeah,
you have to for music, you have to Be quite specific
how you find that music. It's not delivered to
you through the radio. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah,
that's true. Which I mean, wow. Well, then we
have the issue. Well, we have just a new medium
to discover music before was the radio. So it
was very limited. They're all pushing the same
agenda. I was it was radio and newspaper and,
you know, the state control media. Yeah, the
publishing houses and the big corporates, we
knew that like 70s was disco and 80s was glam
metal and 90s was grunge. What era are we in?
I think those things came out of the era having
passed and then people being able to look back
and kind of classify it as like, oh, there was
a predominance of this kind of music during this
era. I think that's just a limit of mediums that
were used. So okay, I think we have, sorry, let
me, sorry to interject. So, how can I put this?
Media was limited. We didn't have social media.
We didn't have the internet per se. And so we
had radio stations that pumped out music. for
example, and they were all playing the same thing.
Why? Because maybe because that's what was available.
That's what was popular. That's what everyone,
you know, whoever was in charge of whatever music
company was trying to push and sell. And so that
our options were limited in as much as we only
had very specific things to go to to find that
stuff. And nowadays with things like, let's say
YouTube, if you have the drive, you can discover
new music. It's a lot easier. Whereas, I guess
the past kids would have to go to the records
tour. This kind of starts leaning into what I
want to take them on. Because it's like the social
bubbling of The algorithm pushing you in a certain
direction because it's convenient It's killed
the opportunity to it's it it's killed the need
to force yourself to look for new thing Is it
pushing you somewhere? Is it just making suggestions
based on your preference? It's certainly making
you maybe lazier the structure of of it Maybe
it's not put it's not pushing you but it's definitely
guiding you in a direction. Yeah based on what
and AI arbitrarily arbitrarily thinks no based
on what you are choosing and what it is seeing
you choose exactly and then that's going in and
then it's going oh this user likes this so increasing
engagement i would increase engagement by feeding
them more of this yes they get sucked into slowly
slowly but surely they get sucked into this bubble
where everything feels the same. I don't know
if you ever browse YouTube, but after a while,
I feel like, fuck, I've been watching the same
shit for hours. Yeah, because it's what you're
into. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Instead of going out
and seeking something yourself with switching
topics and keeping getting fed this. And I think
for us, for us, we came from a time where we
had to fact check and, and figure things out.
and try new things, but I think for a lot of
newer, for the kids that we're teaching, maybe
then they're not doing it. Sure. Maybe. Well,
I mean, no, definitely. But I also don't want
to cynical because I don't think that they're
doing it because... No, we, our kids are fairly
young and ours is only one place. Like, we can't
speak for the greater world, so we really don't
know. I don't want to speak about that either
because... too much old kitty winkles and just
a critical thought you know people aren't thinking
um analytically or critically they're just sort
of absorbing whatever's being fed to them by
algorithms by uh apps that deliver your food
to your door you just it's just that convenience
and filled no longer makes people have to go
out and search of something okay what one single
aspect of society do you think convenience is
I don't know. I don't think so. If anything,
because things are so convenient, wouldn't family
have more time to spend with each other Yeah,
that's what I don't think. They should, but people
don't see, I don't see a lot of that. I see people
working. I see people when they are relaxed,
they're all in their own worlds. You may be in
the same room, but you're not really bonding.
It's the separation. So that is what I mean,
is that everyone's engaged on their phone. Parents
see it. Excuse me. Kids see it because the parents
do it you tell the kid don't don't use your don't
use your smartphone. Don't look at You know device,
but the parents are doing it all the time people
echo what they see. Yeah Yeah, we had a friend
of ours the other day was Saying he said something
actually similar to that. He was at the park
with his family and his kid was Well, he's playing
with his kit and then all these other strangers
kids came and played with him and his kid because
their parents were so disengaged they were just
all looking at their phones yeah and it really
frustrated him because he didn't want to play
with a bunch of strangers kids they're winning
addiction yeah maybe maybe parents are just burnt
out maybe parents don't want to have kids and
they have these kids for whatever reason i think
too many people are having kids that shouldn't
be having kids and people that should be having
kids aren't yeah so but okay let's say we didn't
have phones what would these parents be doing
Talking to other parents and then looking at
their kid and be like, all right, cool. Okay,
Timmy Yeah, that's nice. The kid would be like,
ma look at me and they'd be like, uh -huh. I
still be talking whatever final destination,
you know, it's just I Think I think these are
dynamics that have always existed I'm still intrigued
by the whole convenience kills. I think okay,
maybe it's dopamine addition. Yes more than convenience
kill racing dog mean heads you know just uh quick
fixes yeah doom scrawling yeah i definitely do
it's a real thing it's a real thing yeah no i
know i know i know how much time i waste staring
at my phone and then you get people like just
this morning i saw someone posting something
online saying life is so boring give me a reason
to continue living Well, I mean, that was before,
that was before self -punctuation. Stop posting
shit on this. Go do something else. Go touch
some grants. I want to hug you. That was my reason.
It's scary. I think if we're going to go like
convenience kills, convenience, increase separation
and stress and lead to higher rates of suicide.
I would say, yeah. I have no idea. Not scientific,
not just anecdotal observation. Anecdotal? Okay,
say it again. Let me think about it. Does the
fact that, okay, so it's a little bit, the chain
is a little bit longer. The fact that everybody
needs to travel to work, especially here in China.
Increase distance from family and Convenience
decreases the need and stress for needing to
like go out and meet new people. So you further
isolate yourself because you don't need to leave
your apartment and you become so isolated that
you forget how to interact with other people.
And as a result, you become depressed. And as
a result, maybe suicide rates increase. I think
if someone had a tendency, like, if they had
suicidal tendencies, regardless, it would happen
irregardless. But I don't think that something,
you know, makes that happen. Unless those tendencies
aren't there, if that makes sense. Yeah, but
they wouldn't be, you know. exacerbated because
people would be forced into some sort of situation
going out mixing with others. I certainly think
that socializing and moments like this even just
here three people coming together in a room instead
of being across the world sure increases like
there are a sense of community and well -being
as compared to just switching this off and then
that you're alone. Imagine if we were just in
our separate house, yeah, rooms, yeah. I feel
really, do we just, I feel like I'm just the,
yeah, yeah. I'm like, what's the problem? What's
wrong with me alone all day? We used to go up.
I mean, if. If being alone is a choice, then
absolutely that's a valid choice. I don't want
to touch on introversion and extroversion in
a big way, but I like being alone sometimes.
However, I recognize that when I'm alone for
too long and I don't go out and try to meet new
people, that adrenaline rush for me to go to
a bar and have a beer and meet someone new is...
I mean, fucking huge. I loved it. And if I don't
do that, I become very negative. Sure. Yeah,
I can see that. I can understand that. Yeah.
So I think if it's a choice, yeah, definitely
Val. If it's not a choice and you feel forced
to stay alone, I guess I need you. Yeah, that's
true. That's very true. You want to add? No,
I'm good. Thank you for listening to my... My
point? So many things happen. We really diverged
a lot on that one topic, but I think we led into
like the most one interesting thing that came
to mind is like, yeah, using technology and then
the paradox of being connected as we're more
disconnected. Yeah. So, you know, there are a
lot of. You know, a lot of people. Touch on the
subject one person. I was thinking of in particular.
She's an academic her name is Sherry Turkle,
and she's famous for like You know How society
becomes again more lonely with more Like social
media So, you know like texting and Whatever
can give us a sense of like intimacy, but it's
really like one. It's really one -dimensional
and it really does lack human interaction. So
maybe that's why people feel more close with
their devices. It might be good for me. I think
that example that I brought in, if we were sitting
in separate rooms here, the connection that we
had would be authentic and real and we could
see body language and stuff. It's also very clinical.
And once the door shuts, once the connection
closes, it's like a clean cut. Sure. Yeah. It
doesn't splice into your life, really. Yeah.
Yeah. It's just amazing. It doesn't touch your
face. Was it? Super. Nailed it. How can you say
that? Lighthearted. You want to ask tough questions?
Yeah, yeah. Sorry, this topic didn't bring on
a conspiracy theorist today Yeah, that was good.
I want to I want to have a quick breath Do you
guys want light -hearted or do you want to go
deep I Think we deep and you didn't you want
to take in a different direction? I feel like
we're gonna be today. Yeah, I also think we're
not gonna do okay, so I'm gonna start with but
this one maybe there's just too much shit going
on in our lives well yeah there's too much bandwidth
you know too much bandwidth being occupied by
other shit that's the metaphor bandwidth cheers
thank you welcome back welcome back to part two
episode five i'm going I'm gonna, I'm gonna go.
So I think that a lot of times things happen
in your life and you have a rage quit moment.
Yep. Right? That can happen. I want to know what
the silliest reason is you almost move countries,
quit your job or dyed your hair blue. Why, why
did you change things? Yeah, you can tell this
to him. No way. Oh, dude. It wasn't a rage quit
for me. Rage quit. Is that a thing? It's what
Elon Musk does when he's playing computer games
and people start trolling. Yeah, I know what
Rage Quit is. You're asking why I made a big
decision in life. I did something reckless without
thinking. I know what a Rage Quit is, but I don't
have any Rage Quits examples, but I know I did
something like why and when I came to China.
What really made me go to China finally? The
moment. I was a pizza delivery man. And I was
a pizza delivery man for a franchise restaurant.
And I was having an argument with the waitress
about the philosopher Kant and masturbation.
And I kept saying the name Kant, Kant, Kant,
Kant. This is what I think. And I think the management
heard that. The management was unaware they had
hired a man with a graduate degree to be a pizza
delivery man. But hey, that's the economy at
the time. Everyone's like, oh, China's going
to be so bad. It's all like that. Sorry. You
know, academic pizza delivery man. When worlds
collide. I got I got walked off the premises
that day, they said, they said, I said, what's
wrong? I said, I can't tell you. No, you got
to go. I walked off and I was like, oh, yeah.
Wow. And the colleague you were having an argument
with, she didn't stand up for you at all? No.
Because I would have been like, I was like 28.
Did she know who Colin was? No, I was trying
to explain something to her. She was a staunch
Christian. And I don't know how it came up, but
her argument was... You're going to go blind?
No, it was girls don't do that. And I said, and
for some reason I said, OK, but then I just had
a thought. I was just, this is my... My argumentative
side, I just said, but guys can do it, right?
She goes, yeah, that's no problem. And I said,
wait a minute. It just snowballed. And then I
had to just try to enlighten her. I was still
working at the university while doing this job.
Every day, I was just on, on for lecturing, on
for teaching. And I had just finished a book.
about the history of masturbation i think it
was called like on the hand or with the hand
even the hands something like that and a big
part of why in the west masturbation from what
i remember masturbation is seen as this uh you
know sin was because con was a philosopher and
he wanted to make money and a parent he had created
i could be wrong someone could please tell me
if I'm wrong somebody um he had created devices
to curb masturbation and he or rather no no no
he wanted to publish papers so he somehow got
in cahoots with other people who said masturbation
was wrong so that's how he sold papers and by
papers on academic research, whatever, philosophy,
whatever. And then the Christian church was like,
yo, this guy's really famous. You're getting
really popular. Let's jump on that. Let's join
the bandwagon. And then masturbation was a bad
thing. It was a really bad thing. And then so
that's why it happened. That's why everyone,
at least in the Western tradition, I guess, everyone
thinks masturbation is this terrible thing. You're
telling me that a grown person in this day and
age is a woman don't masturbate. It's just adamant.
Hey, this was like more than 10 years ago. So
it's this day. I don't know. I think zoomers
are very different. Okay. Generation. Okay. Very
different. I think this is before this is before
super wokeness. This is before, you know, George
Peterson, all that stuff. Wait, is Jordan Peterson
in your mind considered super well? No, not at
all, but he's the other center, but what really
yes, but my point is it became In the in like
this wokeness became popular. Oh, yeah, and those
zeitgeist Fair enough in around I think if I
remember around 2014. So this is an altercation
Been around 2013. Okay. All right. So when that
happened I was just like Walked off and just
couldn't believe what happened And I called my
friend. I said, I just got fired. He's like,
why? And I said, can you come pick me up? I'll
tell you. Predictable. And then after that, my
family had sold my child at home. And I was like,
OK, well, I guess it's time I go to China. That
was it. I always planned on going to China. But
I was just always at my university working. And
I was just, you know. Oh, I gotta work more,
I gotta get more experience. And that's what
happened. So I guess that was kind of my ragequity
moment. That's definitely, that's definitely,
it's not, it doesn't have to be a ragequit moment,
but it's definitely a like, fuck this moment.
Yeah. That's cool. That's a good story, thank
you. Yeah, it's a very good story. Do we have
masturbation? Yeah, I guess so. Yeah Can you
I'm not good with philosophers. Can you just
give me a brief break? No I'm not a good I'm
not necessarily good at philosophers. I'm not
a philosophy student. I know only points and
bits of them I could tell you that I in popular
culture Kant is known as a huge racist Okay,
and he had he has like really I guess I guess
you could consider them like kind of conservatively
points like masturbation's wrong. In popular
culture. In popular culture. He was, he's featured
a few times on, I haven't watched enough of a
podcast of her episodes on YouTube, what's her
name? You sent me this person. Oh, philosophy
too. Philosophy too. Yeah. But he also like,
I know him because when I wrote my thesis, I
had to read a lot of Kant because he wrote about
like, a judgment in terms of like needing judges
to critique things and have standards. Okay.
Or like art. So you know philosophers kind of
do everything. Yeah. Because they're smart enough
you know and he's one of the smart ones. Smart
ones but not woke. But not particularly woke
no. Yeah okay. But he was he was definitely like
one of the big guys in the enlightenment. He
don't need but yeah so and there you go. My story?
Yeah. What did you read? Um, I was seeing a girl
that was, um, like myself, quite rambunctious.
And I had seen her, I had friends in the family
first. And when I got to know, I was staying
with, with, with people as her younger sister.
When we got to liking one another, the family
was like, Oh, with the two of your bad combination.
And like anything like that, the more you try
to push something apart, head over heels in love.
In lust, at least. She got a big financial payout
for a disability that she had, but we just had
quite a hedonistic... weekend, and I had become
fed up with the line of work that I was in, and
I, like yourself, always had it in my mind to
go to the East, not necessarily China. And I
didn't go to work for a week, and obviously that
ruffled feathers on their side, and I was like,
yeah, the line has been drawn in the sand, and
I'll be leaving soon, and just up and left. You
decided not to go to work? For a week. It was
quite a, not a rage quit. No, I didn't. I stayed
out of it. It didn't show up. So not a proud
moment at all. Thanks for bringing it up. But
that was when I was like, yeah, okay. Things
need to change direction probably for her benefit
and mine. And now she's super happy and healthy
and not as much weird. No. Why didn't you go
to work? It had nothing to do with work. You
were just heartbroken. No, we were just having
a Oh, you were with the girl. Yeah, we were together
and we didn't go to work. I didn't go to work.
She wasn't working. We got a big financial payout.
Like an eat, pray, love kind of thing. Yeah,
we just road tripped for a while. We just bundled
everything into the car and we just went around
the South Coast. Wow. So romantic. Super, right?
I just don't, I still can't, I still don't understand
why you just wouldn't tell your job. I'm not
coming back. Yeah, I don't know, just absconded.
So, um, none of it. So, it is a good word. I
like it. Um. That's my story. Now I have to tell
my story and I have no... fucking clue what i've
raged quit um i remember why i went yeah so this
is the story well it's not really a stupid reason
actually before i moved abroad before i went
to asia yeah i was doing i was working two jobs
one was as like an online consultant doing SEO
for websites and web design. And the other one
was like part -time glass repair for windshield
chips. So like I had a dentist drill and it would
be drilling holes into people's windshields and
fix it and then claim insurance on that. It was
pretty good. Wait a minute. It sounds like you're
doing something illegal. No, no, no, but with
consent. So they're trying to get insurance and
they're getting you to commit a crime so they
can get insurance? No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
They come to me with an insurance claim and then
I execute on the claim. I fix their windshield
and then claim the money for fixing their windshield.
But you fixed the windshield. Licensed windshield.
Oh, I took it as you were damaging the windshield.
I was like, what? Hey, I need some money. Yeah,
yeah. Help me set my restaurant on fire. And
then I was also working part -time for this guy
that was affiliated with the owner of the glass
company that I was working part -time for. I
was writing our marketing pieces and designing
their website for Australia. I wanted to go to
Australia for love and Yeah, so I was sitting
in a meeting with the stupid piece of shit leader
of SEO who was like four years younger than me
and was only in that position because he's mommy
and you own the company and he was about to be
sent to Australia, which is where I wanted to
go and then he and I had one of the highest value
portfolios at that time in the sales team and
it was like, oh, you're not doing well because
of this and this and this and you don't know
how to do it. So SEO, because this is the strategy
we're using and you're supposed to be doing that.
And I just go, this is all arbitrary bullshit.
Like, it's, it's a theory. And this is how I'm
doing it. And I have the highest value portfolio.
And then I walked out of the meeting and I quit
and I'd been thinking about coming to going to
Thailand for a while. that company was in Thailand
with the marketing Australia guy and I phoned
him. I handed in my resignation. I phoned him.
I was like, I'm going to Thailand. Are you going
to give me a job? And he goes, yeah, I'll give
you a job. And then I walked up, quit the glass
company thing as well. And two weeks later, I
was on a plane to Thailand. In which year? If
you don't want 2012 and 12 and your year that
2014 and 14 in the after in 2018. So there's
four years right before COVID. Oh, yeah. Well,
any state would have screwed you up. Okay, I'm
not done. So then I go to Thailand. Yeah, I start
working for this guy more and he's supposed to
pay me. Oh, but he hasn't paid me. And I'm also
like, I need a visa. Yeah, I'm here on a tourist
visa right now. I've got two months. And he's
like, I'm working on it, I'm working, always
just working on it. So I'm like, okay, fuck,
I have a problem. I need to start teaching. I
need to start doing something to earn money.
Easiest way to do that, teach. So I get a tennis
shirt and start teaching in this shitty vocational
college where... Thai couturiers are following
me home and it's just not appropriate at all.
They're over 18 but they want to do things that
they want to do to a teacher. So I quit there
because of that and then go teach at this teffa
company and then I shut down the... website,
the Australian website for this multinational
OEM manufacturer for Toyota. Okay. It's the company
that I was talking about. Right. It's a motor
manufacturing. What's OEM? Original Equipment
Manufacturing. Okay. So they're a factory in
Thailand that make original parts for Toyota.
Okay. And they were moving into Australia and
selling like the cabs for the pickup trucks,
the canopy. Right. Really nice ones and I shut
down their website. It was like paying up or
I will not switch it back on oh And then they
paid me and then I switched it all on and that's
it Those were about like my quits into teaching
Yeah, it sounds like a movie. Mm -hmm where the
the protagonist, you know gets away with something
that sounds Almost illegal like extortion. I'm
don't give me my money or else. I'm not gonna
turn the website back on Jesus, they had to pay
me. I had been arguing for three months. I'm
giving you something that you haven't paid for.
I know what your first job was like when you
arrived, but as I started off saying in the beginning
of this conversation, that I got a new job and
I needed to provide references. I've been at
the same institution for the last five years.
Prior to that, when I arrived in 2018, the person
that I worked for for a year, in COVID strike
that month, it was like, oh, we can't, we're
shutting down and we can't pay any of the employees
any money. Yeah. So I deleted their, their, their
details, obviously. And now all these years later,
got asked for the, um, for the reference. And
I was like, what does this person's word mean
anyway? Anyway, I was able to provide our tech
details. But strange how something like that
could nearly upset. But if it's shut down and
it doesn't exist, how does it go? I think it's
just an HR tick list. You know, they need to
say, oh, there was a reference available. There
is a human, even though that person. Did you
get a release letter? I did. Oh, that should
count. Yeah, it should, right? I just really,
by the way, they have to give you, I don't want
to talk about that. I really hate this thing
like provider records. Look at my CV. And especially
for an expat working here, there's very little
value in fudging your work experience if you've
been living in a country for x amount of years.
Yeah, I would agree. I mean, pretty good grift
if you manage to create that out of nothing.
Yeah, exactly. But I think it's just the culture.
Everyone needs references. It's very, it's very,
police very heavily, which is, you know, it's
good. It annoys me. That's me. I think that was...
I brought the light into the heart. You definitely
had a more interesting first stint in Asia, I
think. No kids are following me home. Do I? It
was so weird. Getting to your apartment and looking
back and like four of your students are like...
Hiding behind trees? Yeah, like literally not
trees but walls. Yeah. And yeah, I remember I
was pretty down at that time because of the job
being lost. And I remember over Christmas, it's
like a three -week holiday. Wow. In time. Nice.
Different, they have a four -term system and
a two -semester system. Okay. There's value in
that. Yes, I agree. It's feeling good for me.
It's feeling attractive. I was watching Downton
Abbey. Just like, dreaming of beers. Downton
Abbey. Oh, during that time? Yeah, during that
time. What a strange thing to watch. I think
there were times where I just, I like self -COVID
-ed myself. You know what I watched? You know
what I watched when I was - Just because it's
a company, right? I just quarantined myself.
Not during, that wasn't during COVID, was it?
No, no, no, no. That was just like, you were,
yeah, just like, down in the dumps. Yeah, down
to the abbeys. You know, I have tons, I have
tons of examples of that for myself. One, you
know what I watched when I was like down at one
point. I don't know if I should be proud of this
or ashamed, but Riverdale. River. You guys ever
heard of that show? Riverdale? What's the app
that you use? Riverside. You know the Archie
comics? Listen, this is going to sound really
strange having this conversation with you two.
Yeah, I know Archie comics. Jughead and Veronica.
Riverdale was the edgy show that created from
the Archie comics. Teenagers. I remember Archie.
So I watched binge watching that like it was
nobody's business. See, we all watch terrible.
I don't know. Ready for watching things just
out of loneliness and company Harry Potter. So
yeah, I just love having that in the background.
I kind of grew up with it and it's just that
escapism. What's your feeling about JK right
now? I don't have anything. Super thankful for
that. She's becoming vocally and cleaning people
like me. Okay. Yeah. Turf. She's a turf. And
she's very upset that somebody like in the show
they cast a black person. A snake, I think. Is
there a Harry Potter snow? A show? Harry Potter
snow? Harry Potter snow. That's a new drug on
the market. Is there a Harry Potter she got?
The magician of this reality. Harry Potter snow.
So they've put a black person in a snake? I don't
know. I just heard about this yesterday. Now
the straight people and the conservatives are
upset with her too, which makes me happy. We
still haven't answered my question though. Oh
yeah? Is there a Harry Potter? Show it's coming.
It's coming. Okay Well, I'm not that evident
watch that I'm gonna go to following up. I like
the escapism of the films So it's cool. Yeah,
they're watching black books at the moment black
books all British. I know How many times do you
think you've watched Harry Potter Too many times
more than I'd care to admit hours and hours,
I mean Even if it's just on the background and
I'm cooking or I'll be playing guitar or something,
maybe I'll mute it, but it's there. I think in
the way like maybe radio used to be, like radio
is a companion because I live alone, have done
for most of my life. It's on instead of the radio.
That's what I do. I put podcasts on. Podcasts
that I really care about. I listen to someone
live streaming. And you do that too. I do that
too. I think everybody knows that. Maybe that
kind of brings us back to our original topic
of loneliness. Technology. Can't just be alone
and sit with our friends. I dare you to try and
just clean and not listen to stuff. You can't
do it. Have you tried TRE? Do you know what TRE
is? A new drug. We don't get it. Combine that
with Harry Potter. No. Sounds amazing. So TRE
is a type of meditation that is meant to access
your nervous system. It's called trauma and stress
release exercises. Okay. And basically you, you
know, when you have that like lactic burn in
your muscles. um after leg day and your leg like
shakes on its own volition yeah you activate
that response on purpose and you let it play
out nearby okay and it's like i've done it a
few times it's uh it's amazing i don't think
i have the skill to even move no it's good so
that you're you're uh you're able to channel
and activate that yourself. That's a great exercise
too. Yeah, but it's not conscious. It's subconscious.
You're lying on a yoga mat to activate this and
you let allow your release. I can be just mine
from your muscles. Okay, so you don't control
them and your body just shakes and the shake
moves every time. How do you do that? Yeah, that's
what I'm saying. Like surely you should have
that connection from your mind. You're from your
brain to that muscle to that nerve to activate.
I know what I just lie down. I'm going to sleep.
No, no, no, no, no. You have to you do some exercises
that allow you to That allow for their response
to start happening because it's a subconscious
response if there's a bomb that goes off right
next to you If somebody shoots a gun, you're
gonna you're gonna shake. Yeah Wow, right? Yeah
that response that's being activated outside
of its state of trauma Okay, so, okay, so I would
have to do like a hundred squats to feel the
burn and then I gotta sit like 20 and then you
don't need to do that many and then there's a
that you kind of keep them tight when you're
on the yoga mat and you do some like there are
a couple of different exercises you can do there
of course it's on on two person e re theory okay
it's a thing folks it's a thing it's a thing
that i've done with my therapist it makes me
feel amazing yeah makes me feel really happy
it makes sense to me as well because when you
have trauma your body releases that trauma through
the shit right Well, it's fight or flight, isn't
it? It's like a permanent being released into
your muscles to use it. Activating that and allowing
it to run out. Because a lot of times we've been
taught in our modern life just to repress it,
keep control, stay control. Yeah, that's awful
advice. Go and get rid of stress at the gym or
run or do something to let it out. Don't turn
eyes. Well, I personally rather just go to the
gym, but at least it's a and available. I wouldn't
because I'm afraid of the gym. You were sincere
about it. I can be here with you. No, gyms just
make me uncomfortable. I just don't... Oh, you
mean not go to the gym? Self -conscious for the
gym. Oh. But I do go. So it's not a germaphobe
thing where there's a lot of... That followed
me too. Okay, sure. I wish... No, but no I can
it's not I'll it'll bother me it bothered me
like it bothers everybody But not in that huge
level not in the way that I can't I it's more
of a self -conscious that I go I Do I get worried
about touching? Sweatiness we're a thousand sweaty.
Yeah. Yeah, right. I literally take alcohol spray
and that's what I think I want to do like bring
a little spray bottle with me which sounds really
I draw a keen my hands off but you always risk
touching a face or something Yeah, yeah I love
I covet the gyms that have Signs everywhere.
Let's say like please clean the equipment and
they brought it give you towels They have wet
wipes tea from the dispenser. Everyone thinks
this where you feel dirtier than everybody. This
is Oh, well, I mean they exist I rue the day.
I know where they are I'm right here, I know
where they are, and I've been. So that's the
dream. I keep telling Remy to open a gym and
make it like that. I want it, but now I need
money. I'll do it. Partners, partners sponsor.
Cleanest gym ever. Who wants to sponsor opening
a gym? I'll do it. Because then it means I get
to go. I have an expert. Oh yeah, you do? He's
in Wishi right now. She's visiting a really,
really cool gym. that has all of that stuff.
And it's like a proper powerlifting gym. Got
seven powerlifting, like professional powerlifting
stations that you can squat bench and deadlift
at. The photos I saw of her doing her powerlifting,
the weights of these black really thin discs.
So it looks super clean. Heavy chunks of whatever
weights that are. The black ones. Super shiny.
Red plates, red, green, yellow. So they each
color. denote a weight and it's the same the
same denote the notation is that correct i don't
know have we looked up what what do you know
what's it called yeah denotation denotation yeah
there we go uh the olympic plates oh i i imagine
i was i had no idea there was weight color coordination
weight this heavy. Yeah, so this is how the bar
the bar is for in weightlifting like the Olympic
where they lifted about. Yeah. For women that
bar is 15 for minutes 20. Really? As heavy as
that? I thought it was maybe just 10. No, the
bar itself is 20 kilograms. As a standard, you
can assume that any bar is 20 kilograms. Okay,
then you sometimes you'll see the big caps on
the outside. Yeah, those caps are each two and
a half kilograms Sure. Okay, and then that's
exact. The red plates are 25 The blues are 20.
The yellows are 15 the As there's readings Are
10 and then small reds are five. So is every
bar always 20 pounds? No 20 kilograms. These
are three kilograms It's either, no, unless it's,
it should be marked. If it's not, at the end
of a chapter. In my brain, I just don't, I don't
think, I don't acknowledge the bar has weight.
I'm like, does it count? No. No, it does. It's
20 KB. It's because you're from so close to the
States. You guys don't use measurements. So it's,
how can I put it? It's the, it's the weight of
like half of a washing machine. It's pretty light
washing. Yeah, it is. I don't know what other
measurements people from the States use, but
it's never metric. No, no, okay. When I go to
the gym, it depends. Some it's kilograms, some
it's pounds. Yeah. So the bar, if there's a bar,
if it's a standard, obviously you get non -standard.
So I just have to look at the end of the bar
and it'll say - Like there should be a cap on
there. There should be 20. Otherwise you can
assume that it's 20. And so if the bar is shorter.
Yeah. It might be a seven, but I think seven
is the lowest for like a standard sized free
weight. Interesting. You got a profession for
your start up your gym. Favorite exercise in
the gym? Cable flies. Cable flies, interesting.
Yeah, because I need to work on my chesticles
there a bit. The push -ups? Yeah, sure. Oh, my
favorite? Pull -ups? Okay. Or biceps? Too big
for that. How many pull -ups? How many can I
do? I'd say I can do 20. Well, that's good. But
I'm tiny. For me, it's a lot to lift. It's a
bad girl machine. Oh. Doctors hip abducting.
Yeah, I know that. Hip throws, squats, dirt lifts.
That's what I like to do. I don't do pull -ups.
I'm 97 earth kilograms. That's, uh, yeah. Yeah.
Well, that's even all the more, the heavier you
are, the more reason to do it. Cause you'll get
stronger when you're so light diminishing return.
Do you do the like calisthenics workouts at home?
I do. Yeah. Okay. I got a bar in the bathroom.
Cause it's the only place where I have like solid
walls. So it can stay. And then I have weights.
in my laundry room. I'd seen a few weights there.
So it's limited what I can do. Well, I mean,
with a bit of imagination and the willpower,
you can do a lot of exercise. It really is like
you have to outlast yourself and that's what
sucks. Like you go to a gym, you can just put
on heavier weights. So it's a lot more. It's
not, it's not so discouraging. Like the more
reps you have to do, if you have a limited weight,
you guys do more reps. So it's like true willpower.
I enjoy the comradery of Jim. I have to go there
and talk crap the entire time, but it's nice
to have some company. No, I like it too. When
I was back home last year and I got a gym membership
at a random gym, I was just a stranger. But when
like a person approached me and said, can you
help me spot? I was really like, oh my god, me?
Really? I don't know the willpower to do that
stuff at home. I remember during lockdown and
I was alone in my apartment for six weeks in
the old city. I was like, I'm going to be super
fit. I'm going to do all this stuff. And one
day, yeah, I'd be running up and down the stairs
and do pushups. And the next day, 12 o 'clock,
midday, passed out drunk from vodka. You know
what I mean? Just like this weird spiral. And
then the next day, back on the fitness. And then,
you know, go like that for a while. Sure. What's
your PR, Smita? PR? Yeah. Personal Records firm,
Squat Bencher. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, man.
I don't know. For squats? For me, I feel like
I can just keep going for squats. Again, I'm
really light, so I can just keep doing squats.
Without weights. Not a lot. 70 kilograms? Okay.
Because I have not dedicated enough of my life
to weights. I'm all about the glamour. Most of
it's terrible. Benching? Now only 70. I do just
10 reps of that. 10, 11, 12. It's not incredibly
heavy at the moment. That's stronger than most
people. Is it? Okay. I'm gonna bench and see.
I gotta find out. Now I'm really curious. That
seems to be like the standard that everyone measures
by those, like benching or... ASPD, that's the
thing. Squat Bench to Dist. Deadlift, that's
it. But I don't deadlift because bad back and
I'm scared I'm gonna mess it up again. So it
takes really good form, which I don't have yet.
Yeah, right. Yeah, it does. People think deadlift
isn't technical, it's experience. It is, right?
Yeah. I'm also afraid of doing that stuff. What's
your... Four? You want to go? Okay, best for
what? No, I mean, do you want to do your perspective
here? Oh man, my perspective was... We talked
about it. It was the paradox of loneliness. The
paradox of learning. Sorry, with social media.
The more we're connected, the more we're lonely.
I got other topics. You guys want to talk about
kids without reading? Yo, kids can't read. Why
don't kids read more? Kids are reading less.
Yeah. All this dopamine hit from, you got a three
second, a three millisecond. Okay, let's do it.
I was kind of into the gym talk, but... Okay,
let's continue with the gym talk. Okay, how about
this? I didn't tell you what my PR is like. PRs
for what? Okay, let's... Nah, I'm curious, what
are your personal... I know you have personal
bests, because you do... One of your hobbies,
from knowing you, I think, is just like... the
competitive nature of like, lifting. Not me specifically,
but my partner. Yeah, but so like, it's a vocation
of yours. Like, that's why you exercise. Yes,
to get into shape, but there's also the dynamic
of your best. She's a professional athlete. Yeah.
So for me, when it comes to exercise, I know
it's for health, but actually, I'm very, it's
very Lester Berman of me. I just want to look
good naked. But when I'm totally demotivated,
I don't think I look good naked, but when I'm
totally demotivated, I do have to remind myself,
do it for your health. And that makes me do it
even if it's not good. It's kind of like brushing
teeth. You gotta brush your teeth. People brush
their teeth and they hate doing it. And the good
thing about working out at home is you don't
have to go to the gym. So you can do a bad job,
but at least you're willing to exercise. Back
to you. Yeah, my heaviest squat ever. I can't
do anymore. Where's a hundred and fifty kilograms?
Something pounds. Yeah. But now it's down to
like a hundred and fifteen. But then the reps,
that's like just one. That's that's PR is measured
at one rep max. I'm so curious. I really want
to know what mine are. You're going to have to
help me. We can go to gym and maybe in school
or you can come to my place. I just yeah, I just
really want to know what my max things are because
I feel like I don't go as hard as I could. Right,
let's say that comrade agrees. Yeah, like you
have to warm up for it first. You have to do
weight and you build up to that weight because
if you just go as heavy as you think you can,
you're going to hurt yourself. Yeah, yeah. My
heaviest. deadlift ever was 185 kilograms correct
but once you get time wouldn't you tie yourself
up before you know you need to you need to proc
your nervous system to activate deadlift at 85
yeah i got both kilograms yeah bending bar but
now it's down to 135 and that's probably still
worth a beat It still is much more than most
people can do. Bench press, it's 75 max, but
now it's like 70. When you do those deadlifts,
where do you attribute most of that muscle strength
coming from? What muscle do you think? It depends
on the kind of deadlift that you are doing. So
it could be conventional, which is your feet
closer together. and then that goes through the
quads or it could be sounds like sumo deadlift
and that goes through the glutes okay i'm afraid
of doing my legs i'm really afraid of like breaking
my knees or something that's silly doesn't yeah
you have to start if you're not used to doing
heavy weight you have to start a little bit lighter
Well, see, yeah, that's the thing. When people
do stuff like that, it's for just a weird kind
of personal best. Like, why would you want to
just try and lift that much if you're going to
potentially hurt yourself? Yeah. No, no, no.
You're not going to potentially hurt yourself.
Do you want to do it? Or you just want to make
something really happen? For Sophia, she's doing
it as a sport, right? She won the competition
last year. What was I gonna say? Yeah, ego lifting
is a major problem. A lot of guys go into the
gym, they go like, I'm just gonna go full power.
And they just use terrible form and terrible
technique and then they hurt themselves. That's
how it happens. And I think, yeah, that's stupid.
You have to start and build up the weight slowly
and proc your nervous system every time to go...
as heavy as you can, you can make quick jumps
like a lot of weight. You start with like, you
do 20 reps of 20 kilograms and then 10 reps of
80 kilograms and then five reps of 120 kilograms
and then two reps of 130 and then one rep of
180. Right. Whatever kind of escalation you want
to go through. Yeah, yeah, I like it. I like
I don't like the competitive nature Because I
know keep gentle son. You're a good lifter. I'd
never win I'm not an ego lifter because I know
that's also I'm so neurotic, you know, and I
don't ever want to hurt myself So I'm definitely
not an ego lifter. I want to just you know, I
only got server was speaking. I only got into
exercise. I was always such a Passive guy and
long hair when I had hair and guitar play. I
wasn't like my brother was the gym fanatic I
was like, ah, yeah, I'm not about that life So
when I did start I had some good success with
some friends that had their camaraderie and we're
doing that CrossFit sort of high -intensity training
stuff. That was a juggle Yeah, but then I did
get into that wanting to really push and compete
with these guys I've already been doing it injured
my back from a car accident that came out of
that week's hedonism I told you about before
I came to China that crazy week. I didn't go
to work. I ended in a car accident. And so yeah,
that's flared up and it's debilitating. You know,
you don't want to injure yourself. So I'm also
paranoid about doing that. And now keep my form.
I don't want to go too heavy. Strict this form.
Oh, yeah. Bro. Yeah. Yeah. Very good. Gentlemen,
I think that's the end of the podcast for today.
quick end of the session free for all if you
want to ask something or talk about something
bring something up feel free to do that now you
caught us off guard yeah yeah i caught you off
guard i'm sorry i did have you saying that made
me forget what i was going to talk about i did
have another topic because we were talking about
the gym but i'll save it for another time we
could talk a long time about it i think yeah
for sure i'm good sure you look kind of like
you like i got something about something it was
your earrings i was trying to find out what was
on them and then i couldn't figure it out a little
geisha okay was either a geisha or one of the
um uh the british guys with the buzz be on the
guards guards yeah so be a weird choice right
that's what that's what i was still deliberating
in my head. But otherwise, I appreciate you having
me here, man. Yeah, thanks for coming. Thanks
for hosting. It's my pleasure. Yeah. Thanks.
I'm the host of the podcast. You're the host
of the venue. Enjoy it. Are you moving? No, but
landlords, who knows? Oh yeah. Pickle. Pickle
fence. Yeah, I might. I might be. Maybe it's
going to be online. Maybe less connected and
more connected at the same time. That will certainly.
Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for watching
Kalani's Cup. I'm going to stop now. Okay.