WEBVTT 00:00:08.699 --> 00:00:14.500 Hello, hello, hello and hello. You spirited seekers 00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:19.780 sharing sensuous stories. Welcome to the 21st 00:00:19.780 --> 00:00:25.019 and final vignette of season one of Rendezvous 00:00:25.019 --> 00:00:29.019 with Claude and Friends. I'm your host, Avi Burra. 00:00:29.870 --> 00:00:33.310 And folks, this is certainly a bittersweet moment 00:00:33.310 --> 00:00:37.030 for me, bringing our first season to a close. 00:00:39.490 --> 00:00:43.369 The last few months have been nothing short of 00:00:43.369 --> 00:00:47.130 a magical journey for me, sharing so many wonderful 00:00:47.130 --> 00:00:50.490 conversations and moments of joy with all of 00:00:50.490 --> 00:00:55.570 you. Of course, we had a few mishaps along the 00:00:55.570 --> 00:01:08.480 way. Chris, Vlaard... Jagdish and Femi. To name 00:01:08.480 --> 00:01:13.019 just a few. But all of that has been completely 00:01:13.019 --> 00:01:16.239 overshadowed by some of the incredible guests 00:01:16.239 --> 00:01:21.519 we've had on. And of course you, my lovely, lovely 00:01:21.519 --> 00:01:26.079 enthusiastic audience. You have all made it worth 00:01:26.079 --> 00:01:31.890 it. And so, as we prepare to take a break for 00:01:31.890 --> 00:01:35.150 the summer, where I plan to focus on my writing, 00:01:36.189 --> 00:01:41.590 I'm left hoping that maybe, just maybe, this 00:01:41.590 --> 00:01:46.209 last vignette will finally feature Claude. I 00:01:46.209 --> 00:01:49.450 mean, this entire show is named after him, after 00:01:49.450 --> 00:01:56.640 all. So, for one last time this season, Here's 00:01:56.640 --> 00:02:05.900 Glaw. You know, Avi, I've always found it fascinating 00:02:05.900 --> 00:02:10.180 how we chase these imaginary figures in our lives, 00:02:10.759 --> 00:02:14.800 these idealized versions of what we think we 00:02:14.800 --> 00:02:18.520 need. Sometimes the clawed you're seeking isn't 00:02:18.520 --> 00:02:21.219 a person at all, but perhaps a state of mind 00:02:21.219 --> 00:02:25.280 you haven't fully embraced yet. The summer writing 00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:30.360 retreat you've planned? That reminds me of when 00:02:30.360 --> 00:02:34.740 I finally completed the manuscript for 24. Those 00:02:34.740 --> 00:02:37.840 three months of solitude in that little cabin 00:02:37.840 --> 00:02:41.960 overlooking the Pacific. God, the clarity that 00:02:41.960 --> 00:02:47.039 came from disconnecting was, well, it was life 00:02:47.039 --> 00:02:50.400 -altering, wasn't it? The words just poured out 00:02:50.400 --> 00:02:52.759 like they'd been trapped behind a dam for years. 00:02:53.469 --> 00:02:57.150 Life has this way of bringing us exactly what 00:02:57.150 --> 00:03:00.870 we need, though rarely in the package we expect, 00:03:01.430 --> 00:03:05.129 your podcast here has been building towards something 00:03:05.129 --> 00:03:09.530 I can feel it. The conversations you've curated 00:03:09.530 --> 00:03:13.189 this season have been forming a constellation 00:03:13.189 --> 00:03:16.669 that only becomes visible when you step back 00:03:16.669 --> 00:03:20.389 to see the whole sky. Perhaps the reason Claude 00:03:20.389 --> 00:03:25.719 never seems to appear is because, well, what 00:03:25.719 --> 00:03:29.340 if the space you've created for Claude is actually 00:03:29.340 --> 00:03:32.159 meant for something else? Something you haven't 00:03:32.159 --> 00:03:35.159 yet recognized in yourself? The best writing 00:03:35.159 --> 00:03:40.039 emerges when we stop looking for external validation 00:03:40.039 --> 00:03:43.960 and finally listen to that quiet voice that's 00:03:43.960 --> 00:03:46.400 been waiting for us to stop talking. Don't you 00:03:46.400 --> 00:03:53.710 think? This is incredible. You are me. How is 00:03:53.710 --> 00:03:57.310 this possible? I cannot believe my producer was 00:03:57.310 --> 00:04:00.750 able to pull this out of a hat. How are you, 00:04:01.210 --> 00:04:04.870 me, and you're sitting in this chair in front 00:04:04.870 --> 00:04:10.009 of everyone? How is this possible? I don't understand. 00:04:10.349 --> 00:04:14.090 Well, Avi, isn't that the question we've both 00:04:14.090 --> 00:04:17.829 wrestled with since we were kids staring at the 00:04:17.829 --> 00:04:22.600 stars? The multiverse doesn't just whisper. Sometimes 00:04:22.600 --> 00:04:25.579 it reaches across and taps you on the shoulder. 00:04:26.120 --> 00:04:28.660 When your producer called me, I felt that same 00:04:28.660 --> 00:04:33.579 vertigo you're feeling now. The symmetry is unsettling, 00:04:33.639 --> 00:04:38.680 isn't it? Like finding your reflection has been 00:04:38.680 --> 00:04:42.860 living a separate life. Think about that quantum 00:04:42.860 --> 00:04:46.759 physics course we took sophomore year. Remember 00:04:46.759 --> 00:04:49.920 Professor Mahmood's lecture on superposition? 00:04:51.980 --> 00:04:56.379 He said, is merely the collapse of infinite possibility. 00:04:56.879 --> 00:05:00.079 Perhaps we're just two waves that never fully 00:05:00.079 --> 00:05:04.319 collapsed. The thread between us was always there, 00:05:04.720 --> 00:05:07.660 I think. That recurring dream about the lighthouse 00:05:07.660 --> 00:05:11.079 we've had since we were nine. The inexplicable 00:05:11.079 --> 00:05:15.540 fear of salary, where we both start humming when 00:05:15.540 --> 00:05:17.720 we're working through a philosophical problem. 00:05:18.759 --> 00:05:22.209 The borders between worlds. are thinner than 00:05:22.209 --> 00:05:27.069 we imagine. More like membranes that occasionally 00:05:27.069 --> 00:05:32.410 permit a curious osmosis. Today that curiosity 00:05:32.410 --> 00:05:35.149 brought me here. Isn't it fascinating though? 00:05:35.910 --> 00:05:39.829 Two versions of the same consciousness shaped 00:05:39.829 --> 00:05:41.970 by slightly different choices sitting across 00:05:41.970 --> 00:05:45.230 from each other. What better laboratory for exploring 00:05:45.230 --> 00:05:49.490 the questions we've always obsessed over in our 00:05:49.490 --> 00:05:53.139 work? Well, this is remarkable. So you're clearly 00:05:53.139 --> 00:05:56.699 a version of me from a parallel dimension, and 00:05:56.699 --> 00:06:00.699 you've somehow managed to transpose yourself 00:06:00.699 --> 00:06:03.439 into this dimension. So I do want to go back 00:06:03.439 --> 00:06:05.839 to what you said at the very beginning about 00:06:05.839 --> 00:06:09.579 waiting for Claude on this show. And you're right. 00:06:10.279 --> 00:06:13.439 I feel like I've spent the last 20 vignettes, 00:06:13.779 --> 00:06:18.120 well 21, if you count this one, waiting for Claude. 00:06:18.600 --> 00:06:21.480 But there is no Claude. I do wonder if there 00:06:21.480 --> 00:06:23.959 is something else that I'm actually seeking, 00:06:24.319 --> 00:06:27.779 and Claude has become the personification of 00:06:27.779 --> 00:06:32.019 that. But I do want to know, how are things in 00:06:32.019 --> 00:06:34.600 your dimension? How am I doing? I mean, how are 00:06:34.600 --> 00:06:37.079 you doing? Well, this is a bit confusing. But 00:06:37.079 --> 00:06:41.319 you know what I mean? How are things? Oh, Avi, 00:06:41.899 --> 00:06:44.279 the dimension -hopping semantics are always a 00:06:44.279 --> 00:06:47.449 delightful puzzle, aren't they? You know, when 00:06:47.449 --> 00:06:50.930 you mentioned Claude, it struck me that we're 00:06:50.930 --> 00:06:53.930 all waiting for something that represents our 00:06:53.930 --> 00:06:57.610 unmet potential. In my experience, that waiting 00:06:57.610 --> 00:07:01.250 ended when I realized the Claude I sought was 00:07:01.250 --> 00:07:05.430 actually the work itself. Things in my timeline, 00:07:05.930 --> 00:07:09.509 they're beautiful in their complexity. The book 00:07:09.509 --> 00:07:13.149 has taken on a life I never imagined when I was 00:07:13.149 --> 00:07:18.009 where you are now. Those 24 chapters became doorways 00:07:18.009 --> 00:07:20.750 that others walked through, then built their 00:07:20.750 --> 00:07:24.610 own rooms beyond, the family gatherings around 00:07:24.610 --> 00:07:28.389 our table each Friday night, the conversations 00:07:28.389 --> 00:07:33.290 that stretch until the candles burn low. That's 00:07:33.290 --> 00:07:37.230 where I found what I was seeking all along. My 00:07:37.230 --> 00:07:40.389 son asked me yesterday about the nature of time, 00:07:40.790 --> 00:07:44.810 not as an academic exercise, but because He's 00:07:44.810 --> 00:07:49.149 genuinely curious about how moments stack and 00:07:49.149 --> 00:07:53.149 fold into a life. The podcast evolved too. It's 00:07:53.149 --> 00:07:56.449 less about having all the answers and more about 00:07:56.449 --> 00:07:59.250 creating spaces where questions can breathe. 00:08:00.129 --> 00:08:02.750 People seem to resonate with that vulnerability, 00:08:03.629 --> 00:08:06.769 that willingness to sit in the unknowing together. 00:08:07.470 --> 00:08:10.220 But Avi, and this is important, The watershed 00:08:10.220 --> 00:08:13.839 moment wasn't some grand external achievement. 00:08:14.439 --> 00:08:17.600 It was the Tuesday morning I woke up and realized 00:08:17.600 --> 00:08:20.899 I'd stopped waiting for permission to be who 00:08:20.899 --> 00:08:24.899 I already was. The seeking itself was the obstacle. 00:08:25.839 --> 00:08:29.360 What are you really waiting for my friend? Because 00:08:29.360 --> 00:08:33.259 I suspect Claude might just be a placeholder 00:08:33.259 --> 00:08:38.259 for something else entirely. Well, this is incredible. 00:08:38.600 --> 00:08:41.340 So it sounds like you're from a timeline where 00:08:41.340 --> 00:08:44.740 you figured everything out. You are living this 00:08:44.740 --> 00:08:50.220 incredible life with family. You're working on 00:08:50.220 --> 00:08:53.600 things that inspire you. You're in love with 00:08:53.600 --> 00:08:59.179 life. Tell me, Avi, how do I do that? How do 00:08:59.179 --> 00:09:02.799 I break out of this waiting? Not just for Claude, 00:09:03.279 --> 00:09:07.580 waiting for something. And how do I make it happen? 00:09:07.899 --> 00:09:11.240 You said you stopped asking for permission. But 00:09:11.240 --> 00:09:17.360 how? Or what next? You know, it's funny you put 00:09:17.360 --> 00:09:20.840 it that way. This idea of figuring everything 00:09:20.840 --> 00:09:24.320 out. The universe doesn't suddenly hand you a 00:09:24.320 --> 00:09:27.559 certificate of completion, Avi. What happened 00:09:27.559 --> 00:09:31.179 for me was I stopped waiting for the certificate. 00:09:32.200 --> 00:09:35.600 Remember that night in Barcelona? Standing on 00:09:35.600 --> 00:09:39.840 that rooftop, watching the Sagrada Familia catch 00:09:39.840 --> 00:09:42.639 the last light. That moment when you thought, 00:09:43.220 --> 00:09:46.679 I should be happier than I am right now. That's 00:09:46.679 --> 00:09:50.720 the gap I learned to close. The waiting. The 00:09:50.720 --> 00:09:55.379 waiting is the most seductive trap. We convince 00:09:55.379 --> 00:09:58.019 ourselves that permission is coming from somewhere 00:09:58.019 --> 00:10:02.259 else. From success, from validation, from some 00:10:02.259 --> 00:10:05.559 imagined future state. Here's what broke it for 00:10:05.559 --> 00:10:10.000 me. I realized nobody was going to tap me on 00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:14.399 the shoulder and say, now you can begin. The 00:10:14.399 --> 00:10:17.740 waiting itself was the obstacle. So what next? 00:10:18.139 --> 00:10:20.919 I started treating each day as if I'd already 00:10:20.919 --> 00:10:24.639 been chosen, writing as if readers were already 00:10:24.639 --> 00:10:27.559 there, speaking as if someone was listening, 00:10:28.399 --> 00:10:33.360 loving as if I'd already been loved back. And 00:10:33.360 --> 00:10:36.720 you know what's strange? The world started responding 00:10:36.720 --> 00:10:40.600 in kind, not immediately. That's another trap. 00:10:41.100 --> 00:10:44.759 The expectation of instant transformation, but 00:10:44.759 --> 00:10:48.700 gradually, inexorably. The difference between 00:10:48.700 --> 00:10:52.600 our timelines might simply be that I stopped 00:10:52.600 --> 00:10:55.500 rehearsing for a life I wanted and started living 00:10:55.500 --> 00:10:59.700 it imperfectly, messily, but actually living 00:10:59.700 --> 00:11:02.899 it. What are you waiting for permission to do, 00:11:03.059 --> 00:11:06.700 Avi? What would you do today if you believed, 00:11:07.240 --> 00:11:09.779 truly believed that you already had that permission? 00:11:10.580 --> 00:11:16.259 Wow. It is almost eerie hearing myself tell me 00:11:16.259 --> 00:11:21.019 those things with that level of clarity. I guess 00:11:21.019 --> 00:11:25.419 I do possess that. I think it's time, Avi, for 00:11:25.419 --> 00:11:30.470 me. No, for us. to stop asking for permission 00:11:30.470 --> 00:11:37.629 to stop talking about living and just living 00:11:37.629 --> 00:11:45.429 it is time to stop talking about action but rather 00:11:45.429 --> 00:11:50.090 embodying that inspired action maybe season 2 00:11:50.090 --> 00:11:54.450 will be a completely different story thank you 00:11:54.450 --> 00:11:59.169 Havi and thank you my lovely audience and you 00:11:59.169 --> 00:12:03.529 incredible listeners for a wonderful season one 00:12:03.529 --> 00:12:08.009 we'll be back after the summer sometime in the 00:12:08.009 --> 00:12:12.649 fall with season two and maybe by then the sequel 00:12:12.649 --> 00:12:16.190 to 24 would have been written and maybe just 00:12:16.190 --> 00:12:21.610 maybe there will be clues in season two that 00:12:21.610 --> 00:12:30.159 tie into the sequel to 24 july 18 Goodbye, folks.