WEBVTT

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Hello, and welcome back to Real Talk with Rayne

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and Gabe. I'm Gabe. Hello. Today we are going

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to discuss LGBTQ plus representation in media.

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Yeah, that. My brain is fried. I've been working

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all day. Don't come for me. So I know Gabe came

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up with a list of some media. pieces that we

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can look at and talk about. So Gabe, what do

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you think we should start with? Let's start with

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stuff done by Vizipop with Hell of a Boss and

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Hazbit Hotel, mostly just because I feel like

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that is a good representation of LGBTQ media

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on current modern viewpoint. and also in the

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indie space as well. So by indie, I'm referring

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to something that's not Disney, that's not Nickelodeon,

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that's not worried, that's not Cartoon Network,

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that's not worried about a reputation to uphold,

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unlike Netflix and Amazon Prime, where they can

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be a little bit more open to quote unquote. I

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don't even know what word to use to describe

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it because it's not even that bad, but - Being

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progressive? Yeah. I don't know. I feel, and

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we can obviously go into a lot of detail about

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the shows, about Vivzie Pop, but I think one

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of the biggest things to at least acknowledge

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is that she is paving the way for a lot of indie

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animators in the industry and getting picked

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up by Amazon Prime is a huge deal. for an indie

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animator, like to start on YouTube and then get

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picked up at Amazon Prime, that's like the dream,

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right? So she's paving the way a little bit.

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Not to say that there weren't people before her

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that did that, obviously are, but it's interesting

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because when you think about it and some of the

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quotes that I've seen are like not necessarily

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quotes, but I've read some articles about people

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discussing this and a lot of them are talking

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about how I don't know if you agree with this

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or not, but the character design is very, what

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somebody called Tumblr -esque. Whereas I don't

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understand what that means. I was never a Tumblr

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person, so I don't know what that means. I know

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that she - I can explain it a bit if you like.

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Yeah, if you would, because then I may have a

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better idea. Yeah, so the Tumblr art style is

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- And it's intended to be derogatory, right?

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It's intended to be an insult to an art style

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or a artist in general. Basically, if an art

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style is popular enough on Tumblr, a lot of younger

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artists will see that style and bring it into

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their own art style, right? So it'll become almost

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like a trend. You could see like when people

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talk about the Cal Arts style. They're talking

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about, like, the Steven Universe and the gumball

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kind of style where it's very rounded, very big

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eyes, very, like, bean shapes. But that doesn't

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mean... That's not entirely CalArts. That's not

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an entire school's art style. That's just an

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art style that is popular in animation. And with

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Fizzy Pop, because her style... was not only

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very popular on Tumblr at the time, she was a

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very popular Tumblr artist for a long time, had

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comics and animations and stuff before she started

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really growing on YouTube and stuff. So people

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will see that kind of style and immediately use

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the derogatory term of Tumblr art styles. And

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maybe I'm not using the word derogatory correctly.

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It might be a little bit too harsh, but it's

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intended to be an insult, right? It's intended

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to be something to call an art style ugly, unappealing,

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repetitive, not creative, not original. I think

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so. How is it not original? Or even just too

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woke is another thing as well, is Tumblr art

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styles are too woke. So some Tumblr art styles

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will include body hair. on people, so women will

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have unshaved legs. OK. Or women would. Is that

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not OK for is this like a hot take for women

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and not have shaved legs? It is when you draw

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them. It's a very high. They would consider it

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because they consider it unappealing and this

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Tumblr artist is making it. Therefore, it's a

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part of the Tumblr art style. But all that to

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say with Vizipop's art style. It is very much

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like it was popularized on Tumblr, therefore...

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Tumblr art style. There's not really... It's

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intended to be an insult. It's intended to be

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a jab at her woke agenda. It's intended to further

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insult the fact that she... That her art style

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is the way that it is. God forbid people just

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make art and have their own style and just enjoy

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making art in their own fucking style. God forbid.

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Every art style has critiques, right? Because

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in Bizzy Brock's style, you cannot really have

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plus -sized models and characters without it

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being weird, right? She doesn't have a lot of

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examples that I've seen that aren't stacked.

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You don't have tall... bigger people you have

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stout little people not little there's some side

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characters at least or like minor characters

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that I've seen that Were taller and curvier,

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but if we're talking about I think it's mimsy

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we're talking about like mimsy who's like very

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Like short and curvy. That's who I thought of

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yeah, yeah, but yeah, I don't know I'm short

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and curvy so represent. All right, go off mimsy.

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I don't know I When I hear that it just makes

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me think of it almost feels like people can't

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even share their passions with the world anymore

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without people feeling like they're entitled

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to tell you what they think about it and like

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their opinion is gonna change what you do with

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your art and it's you can't just be happy with

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people that they found something that they love

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to do and that they're passionate about doing

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and that they're sharing it with everybody. If

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you don't like it, good for you. Move on. Find

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something better to do with your life than sit

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there and trash on somebody who is just trying

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to do something that makes them happy. God forbid

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people do things that make them happy that aren't

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hurting anybody else. God forbid. Like, it's

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just, so that's annoying to hear that was what

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they meant. So continuing with that thought is...

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So I guess what they were saying then now that

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you've explained that to me is like somebody

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with Viv's art style, which is in their thought

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is not a good art style or not like an art style

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that would typically be picked up and streamed

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on a big platform. That's unique. And I'm like,

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but what, at what point, like what constitutes

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unique art? What makes art? good enough for streaming.

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There's so many different styles like Teen Titans

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Go, regular Teen Titans, like Cartoon Network

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shows, they all have different styles. Danny

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Phantom, Fairly Odd Parents, like Butch Hartman

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did a lot of, he has a very specific style that

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you could tell that it was done by him. And I

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don't feel like anybody's ever complained about

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those shows and their art style. Like I... I

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might just be very chronically offline and I'm

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not a digital artist or an illustrator, so I'm

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not in that field. I'm not in that community

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much, so I don't really know the politics. So

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it's interesting to me to hear that because I'm

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like, isn't a style just more of a subjective

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thing? You would think so, yeah, because in animation...

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the art style usually has to be simplified, right?

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So that way it's easier on the animators to keep

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a consistent turnaround. That's why styles, if

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you were to look at the pilot episode of Steven

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Universe versus the Steven Universe that was

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released, the pilot designs are very unique,

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very illustrative, have a lot of detail, but

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they were simplified. in the series. And a lot

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of people are like, oh, I wish they stuck with

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the original art. I wish they stuck with the

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pilot designs. And that's great. I'm glad you

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liked the pilot designs. But gotta keep in mind

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that with animation, consistency is key. You

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have to have something that's easy to draw, that's

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fast to draw. And usually what's easy and fast

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to draw are rounder bean shapes. That's why it's

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such a popular art style. in media that we see

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nowadays. We see a lot of current cartoons have

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very soft round bean shapes or very simplified

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designs because it's really easy to animate.

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That way we can get episodes out faster and all

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that kind of stuff. With Vizipop and her style,

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it is technically simplified from her usual style.

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There's not a lot of... details, but it's still

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very much a lot of detail. So that's that there's

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a lot of work that goes into that. So there's

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a lot of effort. There's a lot of attention to

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detail, which makes her style very unique in

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that sense, where it's like it's not that she

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doesn't care about the animators. Obviously,

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she does. But her designs are incredibly. complicated

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in the realm of simplicity with character designs.

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And a lot of sharp angles. There's a lot of details

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in the hair. There's a lot of sections in the

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hair. If I recall, their profiles are pretty

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sharp. They're not really thinking so much in

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the 3D space, so much as thinking flat. I could

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be thinking of a different art style. It's been

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a while. But there's like... a lot of patterns.

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There's a lot of asymmetry, right? You can't

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just take one part of the body, flip it around

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and call it a day. You have to individually draw

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the stripes or the patterns on wings or on clothes

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and all that stuff, which could take a lot of

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time, which is probably why any big studio name

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wouldn't accept has been Hotel and hell of a

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boss because it's really complicated. I'm sure

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Vizipop, because of her very iconic designs and

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her very iconic art style, would not want to

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negotiate on that, wouldn't want to lose that

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art of her baby. Her baby looks like that and

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needs to come out like that. And also she's an

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animator herself, so she understands this already.

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She understands how complicated it is to animate

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her characters. She's done it before. Um, yeah.

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So she is aware of the struggles and she's, I

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can animate this. I know people who on my team

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who can animate this. Therefore, I'm not going

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to negotiate down on this art style if they can

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also do it. If I know that this can be possible,

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I don't want to... lose that creative integrity

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if I can help it. That's just me assuming. I

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don't know her. I wasn't in the room. This is

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just based off of my knowledge of the industry

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and from what busy pop has given and indicated

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in interviews from her personality. But like,

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but that could also be another part. And to get

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back on topic a little bit, another part that.

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could be the reason why it wasn't picked up by

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mainstream is because Vizipop is very adamant

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about having her characters be openly and clearly

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queer. They have, there's no negotiating with

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that. They are gay characters. There is a clear

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lesbian relationship between two of the characters

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that were established before the canning of the

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story. That's already there. There is romantic

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tension between two male characters during the

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start of the show. There is implied polygamy

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with the bees. There is, and even in Hell of

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a Boss, there is literally a trans imp that is

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like Millie's sister. I can't remember if this

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was explicitly said or if it was all implied,

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but the way I found out about it was because

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of... people's due diligence in the series. And

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they were like, oh, male imps have this horn

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pattern and female imps have this form pattern,

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but she has a different form pattern. Therefore,

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she's a trans woman. And I was like, that's really

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clever because if because again, I didn't watch

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the whole series. So you'll have to correct me

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if I'm wrong. But if she didn't explicitly say,

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hey, my sister is a trans woman or this she's

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trans. That whole entire part of her identity

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just being implicit, just for something that

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for the audience, for the fans to figure out,

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it's really good and really nice because it doesn't

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bring the fact that, oh, this character is trans

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to the forefront of that character. You wouldn't

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know that she was trans until you've figured

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out the whole imp horn thing. I really enjoy

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that. I think that's a great way to show trans

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representation in a visual style that doesn't

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compromise the feminine design of that woman.

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You know what I mean? Because sometimes when

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it comes to trans characters, they try to overcorrect

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almost or make a very feminine man or a very

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masculine woman. and be like, oh, they're trans.

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And I don't like that. I don't like how some

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series is tried to imply that they're trans by

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going the other way or still giving them feminine

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or masculine qualities, depending on which way

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they turn. It's also like erasing the fact that

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like you can. You can have whatever traits you

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want, and it doesn't erase who you are. One of

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my characters, like, in one of the podcast stories

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that'll come up, he's very openly gay, very feminine,

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very, like, ridiculously dramatic and over -the

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-top, but that's just how he is. It's not meant

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to be, like, this is how all gay men are. It's

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literally, there's some people who are just happy

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with life, and they're just happy people, and,

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like, I had a boss, sis. a cisgender female boss

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who was like that. She was just like, I was like,

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girl, are you on something? Because can you give

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me something? Because she was so happy. I was

00:15:45.679 --> 00:15:47.799
like, how is one person this happy all the time?

00:15:47.820 --> 00:15:50.720
I don't know. And it scares me. But at the same

00:15:50.720 --> 00:15:53.580
time, like any time she was in the room, like

00:15:53.580 --> 00:15:57.159
it was just, she lit up the room. She boosted

00:15:57.159 --> 00:16:00.139
everybody's energy. It was, and she was our manager.

00:16:00.360 --> 00:16:02.639
So it was so much fun to work with her because

00:16:02.639 --> 00:16:06.360
she was always just a joy in. a positive person

00:16:06.360 --> 00:16:08.679
to be around. But people, I feel like in media

00:16:08.679 --> 00:16:10.799
nowadays, because there are some stereotypes

00:16:10.799 --> 00:16:15.519
that lead people to think that a character is

00:16:15.519 --> 00:16:18.700
one way or the other. That's really not how like

00:16:18.700 --> 00:16:22.080
being a human works. Like you can completely

00:16:22.080 --> 00:16:25.419
have whatever set of traits that are unique to

00:16:25.419 --> 00:16:28.399
you. They can either fit into a box or not. But

00:16:28.399 --> 00:16:32.440
at the end of the day, people need to stop pigeonholing

00:16:32.440 --> 00:16:36.019
characters into one thing or the other and see

00:16:36.019 --> 00:16:40.360
them as characters that are, like people, unique.

00:16:40.639 --> 00:16:43.399
And they all have different aspects of their

00:16:43.399 --> 00:16:46.399
personality. If they're fully flushed out that

00:16:46.399 --> 00:16:51.019
they have background, maybe like they're, what

00:16:51.019 --> 00:16:53.940
is it called? How they were raised contributed

00:16:53.940 --> 00:16:56.620
to how they act now, like traumas that they went

00:16:56.620 --> 00:17:00.610
through. Anything that can... contribute to that

00:17:00.610 --> 00:17:03.429
that you may not know in the first season, you

00:17:03.429 --> 00:17:05.789
may not know in the first episode, like it might

00:17:05.789 --> 00:17:07.910
be something where they're like leaving a trail

00:17:07.910 --> 00:17:13.130
of breadcrumbs for the audience to figure out,

00:17:13.250 --> 00:17:15.910
or they could just be like, I'm here, I'm queer,

00:17:16.089 --> 00:17:18.509
I'm here, I'm gay, hello, I'm fabulous. And there's

00:17:18.509 --> 00:17:22.710
nothing wrong about that. People are so quick

00:17:22.710 --> 00:17:27.000
to judge and to... put their expectations on

00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:29.180
a character's identity and how they should act

00:17:29.180 --> 00:17:33.019
in order to find the representation good enough

00:17:33.019 --> 00:17:37.059
is weird, because even if we're talking about

00:17:37.059 --> 00:17:40.480
Hazbin Hotel with Lucifer, I don't know Cannon.

00:17:40.519 --> 00:17:42.819
I'm not really sure what his sexuality is, Cannon,

00:17:42.980 --> 00:17:47.500
but obviously he was with Lilith and... But people

00:17:47.500 --> 00:17:50.259
are now like, because he's so, like, eccentric

00:17:50.259 --> 00:17:54.079
and he's high energy and he's, like... immediately

00:17:54.079 --> 00:17:56.960
assume that he has to be bi or he has to be pan

00:17:56.960 --> 00:17:59.819
or he has to be this and I'm like But the thing

00:17:59.819 --> 00:18:02.700
is like people can't just be who they are without

00:18:02.700 --> 00:18:05.359
you having to label them. Yeah, exactly Just

00:18:05.359 --> 00:18:09.119
let them be their character and be more than

00:18:09.119 --> 00:18:14.720
What they identify as no one is just Only who

00:18:14.720 --> 00:18:17.339
they identify as there's more to people. There's

00:18:17.339 --> 00:18:22.089
more to characters in good writing they're multifaceted.

00:18:22.269 --> 00:18:24.750
It's not just, this is the gay character, this

00:18:24.750 --> 00:18:28.009
is the straight character. And I don't, like

00:18:28.009 --> 00:18:31.509
for me, I've written straight characters in a

00:18:31.509 --> 00:18:34.190
lot of my stories. That doesn't mean that there's

00:18:34.190 --> 00:18:37.670
not gonna be LGBTQ plus representation. Like

00:18:37.670 --> 00:18:40.829
I think some creators too feel like a pressure

00:18:40.829 --> 00:18:47.079
almost to not get... canceled or called out because,

00:18:47.119 --> 00:18:50.220
like, their characters at the forefront of the

00:18:50.220 --> 00:18:54.220
story are presenting as heteronormative. But

00:18:54.220 --> 00:18:57.180
you don't know. You don't know. They could be

00:18:57.180 --> 00:18:59.059
curious. You don't know what happened in their

00:18:59.059 --> 00:19:01.380
past. You gotta watch it. You gotta know the

00:19:01.380 --> 00:19:04.700
story. And it's... Yeah. It's sad to me to see,

00:19:04.700 --> 00:19:07.819
like, creators forced into a corner of, wait,

00:19:08.119 --> 00:19:10.500
but if you write about a heterosexual couple,

00:19:10.779 --> 00:19:14.559
you're not representing LGBT. I'm like... So

00:19:14.559 --> 00:19:18.299
are we just not supportive of everybody now?

00:19:18.579 --> 00:19:22.059
Is it like... Yeah. So I understand, and that's

00:19:22.059 --> 00:19:26.240
why it's hard, right? There should be more representation

00:19:26.240 --> 00:19:29.420
in media. There should be more representation

00:19:29.420 --> 00:19:32.960
in media of everybody and all minorities and

00:19:32.960 --> 00:19:36.859
all abilities and all sexualities. That doesn't

00:19:36.859 --> 00:19:40.559
mean that you have to erase... other people's

00:19:40.559 --> 00:19:44.160
identities as well. Everybody is allowed to be

00:19:44.160 --> 00:19:46.920
who they are. Everybody should feel like they're

00:19:46.920 --> 00:19:49.339
allowed to be seen and live their life as long

00:19:49.339 --> 00:19:51.660
as they're not hurting anybody and going out

00:19:51.660 --> 00:19:54.920
of their way to be a menace to society. Why does

00:19:54.920 --> 00:19:57.700
it matter if the main character is queer or not?

00:19:58.339 --> 00:20:01.599
It's okay. It's okay for them to not and for

00:20:01.599 --> 00:20:04.640
the creator to be backed into a corner like I'm

00:20:04.640 --> 00:20:08.339
saying this as a queer woman. It's, I'm not going

00:20:08.339 --> 00:20:11.500
to be upset if I watch media about a straight

00:20:11.500 --> 00:20:17.119
couple. I don't care. We just want it to be good.

00:20:17.279 --> 00:20:19.940
I'm like, I don't care whether your characters

00:20:19.940 --> 00:20:22.539
are straight or queer. I care if the writing

00:20:22.539 --> 00:20:25.259
is good and if the story is. We just finished

00:20:25.259 --> 00:20:28.779
watching The Good Place, Amanda and I. Oh my

00:20:28.779 --> 00:20:35.190
God. Oh, that. It's not for this podcast, but

00:20:35.190 --> 00:20:39.210
I we were so invested in that show the writing

00:20:39.210 --> 00:20:44.069
was so good and The main characters pretty much

00:20:44.069 --> 00:20:46.809
all of the like the couples that get together

00:20:46.809 --> 00:20:50.829
are like heterosexual couples all of them But

00:20:50.829 --> 00:20:52.369
then there's the main character like kind of

00:20:52.369 --> 00:20:55.450
hits on the girls occasionally and it's people

00:20:55.450 --> 00:20:58.490
are like oh I'm like just let it be what it is.

00:20:58.490 --> 00:21:02.130
Just let it yeah We need to stop putting so much

00:21:02.130 --> 00:21:06.170
pressure and expectation on works of literature

00:21:06.170 --> 00:21:11.049
and works of media because over time it's just

00:21:11.049 --> 00:21:13.150
going to become like people are going to be too

00:21:13.150 --> 00:21:17.109
afraid to have ideas. Yeah. Because they're not

00:21:17.109 --> 00:21:19.470
going to not everyone is going to agree with

00:21:19.470 --> 00:21:21.490
you wanted with what you want to do or what you

00:21:21.490 --> 00:21:24.450
want to say or people who are in the LGBT plus

00:21:24.450 --> 00:21:27.670
community. Obviously we want to see more representation

00:21:27.670 --> 00:21:31.210
and the representation that we do have, like

00:21:31.210 --> 00:21:33.089
some of the movies that I've watched that I could

00:21:33.089 --> 00:21:37.289
list that I'll go into. For example, I've noticed

00:21:37.289 --> 00:21:41.769
a lot of lesbian movies, Debs, But I'm a Cheerleader,

00:21:42.450 --> 00:21:44.970
Loving Annabelle, Chasing Amy. There's a lot

00:21:44.970 --> 00:21:50.410
of interesting ones. And usually from one from

00:21:50.410 --> 00:21:53.069
the ones that I've seen or like the L word or

00:21:53.069 --> 00:21:57.369
lip service, similar like TV shows. It's always

00:21:57.369 --> 00:21:59.839
like One woman has to be dominant and the other

00:21:59.839 --> 00:22:02.779
one has to be submissive. And there's no in between.

00:22:03.000 --> 00:22:05.480
And the dominant one is usually a brunette and

00:22:05.480 --> 00:22:07.779
the submissive one is usually a blonde. And I'm

00:22:07.779 --> 00:22:10.839
just like, I did a whole project on this in college.

00:22:10.900 --> 00:22:13.480
I'm not even kidding. Cause I got my degree in

00:22:13.480 --> 00:22:16.000
gender studies. I know, but it's interesting

00:22:16.000 --> 00:22:19.380
that, and I'm like, what psychology goes into

00:22:19.380 --> 00:22:22.880
the fact that like, why is the dominant one in

00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:26.480
the relationship always, almost always brunette

00:22:26.480 --> 00:22:30.460
or older? Yeah. The dominant woman in the relationship

00:22:30.460 --> 00:22:33.680
is either older with an age gap that's sketchy

00:22:33.680 --> 00:22:37.559
or brunette. And then it's like the younger one

00:22:37.559 --> 00:22:40.440
is always the one that's either submissive or

00:22:40.440 --> 00:22:44.460
they're very like, I'm chasing you older lady.

00:22:44.900 --> 00:22:49.880
And it just, there's not a lot of realistic,

00:22:49.880 --> 00:22:53.940
I feel like representation. It's more from what

00:22:53.940 --> 00:22:58.980
I've seen, I think a lot. of LGBTQ plus media

00:22:58.980 --> 00:23:03.279
is almost fetishized. I agree. I feel like they

00:23:03.279 --> 00:23:06.599
either fetishize or they fall onto those stereotypes

00:23:06.599 --> 00:23:10.259
for the sake of representation. Oh, look, we

00:23:10.259 --> 00:23:13.400
did it, but that's not a realistic relationship.

00:23:13.819 --> 00:23:17.880
Yeah, like they give up on writing good characters

00:23:17.880 --> 00:23:20.720
or writing a compelling story because they're

00:23:20.720 --> 00:23:24.900
so focused on getting their gay quota. or to

00:23:24.900 --> 00:23:27.180
fight the queer -baiting allegations. And it's,

00:23:27.359 --> 00:23:30.259
no, we just want a good fucking story that has

00:23:30.259 --> 00:23:33.500
gay characters. Like, if they're not, yeah. Obviously,

00:23:33.720 --> 00:23:35.880
Charlie has to be the dominant one in the relationship

00:23:35.880 --> 00:23:38.000
because she wears something that resembles a

00:23:38.000 --> 00:23:44.200
tuxedo. Yeah. Er, what? Okay, I'm sorry. That

00:23:44.200 --> 00:23:48.500
is just as intense. And, like, the whole dominant,

00:23:48.660 --> 00:23:51.519
submissive thing. I feel like that kind of gets

00:23:51.519 --> 00:23:53.299
thrown around too. Like even when Amanda and

00:23:53.299 --> 00:23:58.359
I go out as a married lesbian couple, they always

00:23:58.359 --> 00:24:02.500
give her the check. Even if I want to pay. Like

00:24:02.500 --> 00:24:04.700
sometimes the good restaurants will put it right

00:24:04.700 --> 00:24:08.420
in the middle. They don't like make an assumption,

00:24:08.839 --> 00:24:12.519
but Amanda has very short hair and she dresses

00:24:12.519 --> 00:24:16.099
more masculine than I do. I'm very androgynous,

00:24:16.099 --> 00:24:18.990
but sometimes I'll wear like... a nice dress

00:24:18.990 --> 00:24:21.549
or I'll just wear like whatever I want, whatever

00:24:21.549 --> 00:24:25.569
I'm feeling that day. But Amanda is always in

00:24:25.569 --> 00:24:29.309
pretty more like I would say athleisure wear

00:24:29.309 --> 00:24:33.730
or like jeans and like a t -shirt. She presents

00:24:33.730 --> 00:24:37.490
very masculine or if we want to use the word

00:24:37.490 --> 00:24:40.750
like butch, she presents that way. And that's

00:24:40.750 --> 00:24:43.009
how she's comfortable. That's how she likes to

00:24:43.009 --> 00:24:44.890
present. There's nothing wrong with that. But

00:24:44.890 --> 00:24:47.740
then people... Even nowadays, even though we've

00:24:47.740 --> 00:24:51.240
come so far with representation and not stigmatizing

00:24:51.240 --> 00:24:53.660
people until you look more like the man in the

00:24:53.660 --> 00:24:55.759
relationship. So I'm going to give you the bill,

00:24:56.039 --> 00:24:59.019
which is a whole nother issue. There's a whole

00:24:59.019 --> 00:25:02.619
other separate podcast for that. But that always

00:25:02.619 --> 00:25:05.740
annoyed me because what if I want to treat my

00:25:05.740 --> 00:25:07.500
wife to dinner, but they're going to assume that

00:25:07.500 --> 00:25:09.220
she's taking the check because she has short

00:25:09.220 --> 00:25:15.259
hair? Yeah. What? Women can take men out to dinner,

00:25:15.319 --> 00:25:19.440
too, and pay. It's not weird. It's 2025. There's

00:25:19.440 --> 00:25:23.700
so many, like, societal weird rules that society

00:25:23.700 --> 00:25:27.200
puts on people. Okay, we'll accept you, but you

00:25:27.200 --> 00:25:31.200
need to reach this criteria, though. Yeah. And

00:25:31.200 --> 00:25:35.579
it's stupid. There's so much more to people that

00:25:35.579 --> 00:25:41.109
can ever be labeled or described. You just you

00:25:41.109 --> 00:25:43.490
can't do that because people are all gonna be

00:25:43.490 --> 00:25:46.450
unique. We're not made from the same atoms or

00:25:46.450 --> 00:25:48.549
molecules We're all completely different. So

00:25:48.549 --> 00:25:53.890
why are we? trying to Categorize people because

00:25:53.890 --> 00:25:57.289
it's easier for society to know and to guess

00:25:57.289 --> 00:25:58.849
who you are. Like why does it matter? Why do

00:25:58.849 --> 00:26:00.609
you need to know? They're just a person Yeah,

00:26:01.069 --> 00:26:03.309
like it shouldn't have to matter and there shouldn't

00:26:03.309 --> 00:26:05.930
be pressure on which way a story should go or

00:26:05.930 --> 00:26:08.640
how what? the characters should do or look like

00:26:08.640 --> 00:26:10.460
or who they should love or how they should act.

00:26:10.559 --> 00:26:13.599
Just make a good story. That's what matters.

00:26:14.119 --> 00:26:16.859
If you're upset about the couple being straight

00:26:16.859 --> 00:26:21.440
presenting, I don't know what to tell you. It's

00:26:21.440 --> 00:26:24.819
a weird thing to be angry about. We have too

00:26:24.819 --> 00:26:27.440
many straight presenting couples in media. That's

00:26:27.440 --> 00:26:32.480
totally fair. We need to have more diversity

00:26:32.480 --> 00:26:36.420
in media and in literature. At the same time

00:26:36.420 --> 00:26:38.319
though, when we have that, I feel like it's a

00:26:38.319 --> 00:26:41.640
catch -22 because then when we have that, it's

00:26:41.640 --> 00:26:43.740
almost like we said, it's fetishized almost and

00:26:43.740 --> 00:26:48.779
it's not really representing real queer relationships.

00:26:50.339 --> 00:26:53.240
Even if it is, people will see it as not good

00:26:53.240 --> 00:26:56.359
enough, not meeting my expectations. No one's

00:26:56.359 --> 00:26:59.480
ever going to be happy. I was going to add on

00:26:59.480 --> 00:27:02.920
to that because there are because - gender is

00:27:02.920 --> 00:27:04.579
a spectrum, because sexuality is a spectrum.

00:27:04.779 --> 00:27:09.779
There's a lot of nuance, right? And a lot of

00:27:09.779 --> 00:27:16.599
people hate it when creators make characters

00:27:16.599 --> 00:27:19.220
that fall into that nuance because they're like,

00:27:19.220 --> 00:27:22.720
oh, that's not good representation. No, there

00:27:22.720 --> 00:27:25.420
are characters who are like that. Yamato from

00:27:25.420 --> 00:27:28.319
One Piece. I don't know if you've seen him, but

00:27:28.319 --> 00:27:32.779
he looks like a woman. He is drawn in the same

00:27:32.779 --> 00:27:36.099
stylization as the other woman in One Piece,

00:27:36.279 --> 00:27:38.839
as a very hourglass figure. He goes by he, him

00:27:38.839 --> 00:27:42.259
pronouns. He is known as the son of Kaito. He

00:27:42.259 --> 00:27:45.599
is a son. He is a man. He identifies as a man.

00:27:45.700 --> 00:27:49.400
Everyone calls him a man, but he looks like a

00:27:49.400 --> 00:27:53.660
woman. He does not pass. That frustrates a lot

00:27:53.660 --> 00:27:58.099
of people. A lot of people are misunderstanding

00:27:58.099 --> 00:28:02.309
his character. because he doesn't look like a

00:28:02.309 --> 00:28:07.150
man. He's not passing. He's not masculine enough.

00:28:07.349 --> 00:28:12.230
He is comfortable in his skin presenting as a

00:28:12.230 --> 00:28:16.049
woman. He doesn't feel gender dysphoria. He is

00:28:16.049 --> 00:28:19.170
happy how he looks, but he is just a man. And

00:28:19.170 --> 00:28:22.529
there is nuance in that. There are trans men

00:28:22.529 --> 00:28:27.710
who do feel comfortable presenting like a woman.

00:28:28.009 --> 00:28:30.869
That does not make it bad representation. That

00:28:30.869 --> 00:28:33.309
does not make it inaccurate representation. And

00:28:33.309 --> 00:28:35.890
it actually really fucking grinds my gears because

00:28:35.890 --> 00:28:38.549
it's, oh, look, a trans man. And we all hate

00:28:38.549 --> 00:28:44.130
him because he's not who he... Up to our standards.

00:28:44.150 --> 00:28:47.589
Yes. Or what we want him to be. Yeah, it's...

00:28:47.589 --> 00:28:50.450
Yeah. And that's, it really frustrates me as

00:28:50.450 --> 00:28:54.170
a trans man because it's so, those, so trans

00:28:54.170 --> 00:28:58.829
men who... who look feminine, who pass as feminine.

00:28:59.109 --> 00:29:02.250
So they're not men anymore. That's the line you're

00:29:02.250 --> 00:29:04.170
drawing, is that they're not men anymore. So

00:29:04.170 --> 00:29:07.309
I wasn't a man before I started T, before I started

00:29:07.309 --> 00:29:09.930
looking like one. It just really bothered me.

00:29:10.089 --> 00:29:11.809
What does a man look like? What does a woman,

00:29:11.930 --> 00:29:14.650
what does a non -binary person look like? What's

00:29:14.650 --> 00:29:17.569
the definition? Cite your resources. I don't,

00:29:17.769 --> 00:29:22.390
people are not supposed to be defined like that.

00:29:22.509 --> 00:29:24.690
Like, people are just supposed to exist. I feel

00:29:24.690 --> 00:29:29.390
like truly spiritually, like, it's gotten so

00:29:29.390 --> 00:29:35.190
off track with development of people being just

00:29:35.190 --> 00:29:37.150
who they are. Like, at the end of the day, when

00:29:37.150 --> 00:29:40.170
we all pass away, we're gonna be like, we're

00:29:40.170 --> 00:29:43.650
gonna be dead. It's not gonna fucking matter

00:29:43.650 --> 00:29:46.349
what clothes you wear or how your hair is laying.

00:29:46.450 --> 00:29:48.289
It's not gonna matter. You're gonna be dead and

00:29:48.289 --> 00:29:50.509
you're gonna be like a little ball of light floating

00:29:50.509 --> 00:29:54.819
around in the universe. And from what I truly

00:29:54.819 --> 00:29:57.559
believe, it's when we pass, it's just love. It's

00:29:57.559 --> 00:30:01.319
love and light and good energy. And that's, so

00:30:01.319 --> 00:30:03.500
that's what it really should be in the world.

00:30:03.799 --> 00:30:06.220
There's so much judgment because humans have

00:30:06.220 --> 00:30:08.559
this need to be right. Humans have this need

00:30:08.559 --> 00:30:13.599
to always like understand. And if I don't understand

00:30:13.599 --> 00:30:18.299
it, it's not right, which is very selfish and

00:30:18.299 --> 00:30:20.630
narrow -minded. for you to look at it like that.

00:30:20.910 --> 00:30:22.990
It's similar to in the beginning of my relationship

00:30:22.990 --> 00:30:26.329
with Amanda when she was still very, she still

00:30:26.329 --> 00:30:29.869
had a lot of old mindsets, I would say, like

00:30:29.869 --> 00:30:31.930
very conservative. I don't know how to explain

00:30:31.930 --> 00:30:35.970
it, but for an example, like she would say, oh,

00:30:35.970 --> 00:30:39.009
because you're with a woman, like you wouldn't

00:30:39.009 --> 00:30:41.029
have the desire to be with a man. And I was like,

00:30:41.029 --> 00:30:46.470
no, I see Jason Momoa and my ovaries explode.

00:30:48.809 --> 00:30:53.349
I'm sorry, I... Damn. Like, but that doesn't

00:30:53.349 --> 00:30:55.630
mean that I'm gonna act on those. If I'm in a

00:30:55.630 --> 00:30:58.009
relationship, like, I'm in a relationship with

00:30:58.009 --> 00:31:00.410
you. That doesn't mean I'm not gonna see Jason

00:31:00.410 --> 00:31:02.930
Momoa pop up on my screen and start barking and

00:31:02.930 --> 00:31:06.769
howling. Like, I will. And it's not because I

00:31:06.769 --> 00:31:10.970
wanna be with a man. It's because as a pansexual

00:31:10.970 --> 00:31:15.410
queer woman, I'm like, everyone is hot. Help

00:31:15.410 --> 00:31:19.109
me. And that's the struggle is I can find anyone

00:31:19.109 --> 00:31:21.549
attractive, regardless of their gender. That

00:31:21.549 --> 00:31:23.170
doesn't mean that I want to be with that person.

00:31:23.210 --> 00:31:25.410
That doesn't mean I'm going to divorce my wife

00:31:25.410 --> 00:31:28.069
and try to go marry Jason Momoa. No, it just

00:31:28.069 --> 00:31:31.329
means that people are able to be attracted to

00:31:31.329 --> 00:31:33.690
whoever they're attracted to. It's an attraction.

00:31:33.849 --> 00:31:38.069
It's not an action. Yeah. And it's people, I

00:31:38.069 --> 00:31:40.250
think, are trying to be too controlling of the

00:31:40.250 --> 00:31:42.490
narrative of how other people identify and live

00:31:42.490 --> 00:31:46.920
their lives. And because of that, it translates

00:31:46.920 --> 00:31:50.819
into media. It translates into, now, I can't

00:31:50.819 --> 00:31:52.700
control you, so I'm gonna control your characters'

00:31:52.880 --> 00:31:55.400
narratives, and I'm either going to agree with

00:31:55.400 --> 00:31:58.339
you or disagree with you. And if I disagree with

00:31:58.339 --> 00:32:01.400
you, you're a bad writer, or you're a bad person.

00:32:02.420 --> 00:32:05.359
Or you're not doing X, Y, Z right. Yeah. It comes

00:32:05.359 --> 00:32:07.619
to the point where it's just, yes, there should

00:32:07.619 --> 00:32:10.480
be more representation in media, and there should

00:32:10.480 --> 00:32:14.400
be... flexibility for characters to just exist

00:32:14.400 --> 00:32:18.579
as their authentic selves, just like people exist

00:32:18.579 --> 00:32:21.140
as their authentic selves. There shouldn't be

00:32:21.140 --> 00:32:23.960
any hate or expectations around it, just accept

00:32:23.960 --> 00:32:26.099
that people are going to be different and unique

00:32:26.099 --> 00:32:29.799
to who they are. It doesn't make anything bad

00:32:29.799 --> 00:32:32.319
because the characters are straight or because

00:32:32.319 --> 00:32:34.559
the characters are queer and then it's, oh, the

00:32:34.559 --> 00:32:37.000
gay agenda now, everything is whatever. And I'm

00:32:37.000 --> 00:32:40.710
like, that's stupid too. That's also dumb. you're

00:32:40.710 --> 00:32:44.190
like, people want to have their cake and eat

00:32:44.190 --> 00:32:47.450
it too. And they also don't want to see anything

00:32:47.450 --> 00:32:50.769
that doesn't align with their views, which if

00:32:50.769 --> 00:32:55.190
everybody agreed on everything, there wouldn't

00:32:55.190 --> 00:32:58.930
ever be any discourse or communication. There

00:32:58.930 --> 00:33:02.869
wouldn't be that challenge of challenging the

00:33:02.869 --> 00:33:05.769
mindset of what people think. And when they see

00:33:05.769 --> 00:33:09.960
new media or read new literature, like, challenging

00:33:09.960 --> 00:33:12.799
them to think differently, challenging them to

00:33:12.799 --> 00:33:16.740
see beyond their own self. Yeah. That's really

00:33:16.740 --> 00:33:19.140
the problem. Because when you're judging other

00:33:19.140 --> 00:33:22.319
people, you're really being more judgmental of

00:33:22.319 --> 00:33:26.200
yourself. And it may not seem that way, but if

00:33:26.200 --> 00:33:29.380
you look internally, there's something within

00:33:29.380 --> 00:33:31.380
you that you're not happy about. There's something

00:33:31.380 --> 00:33:34.160
within you that is missing or that is hurting

00:33:34.160 --> 00:33:38.079
that you feel the need to put this negativity

00:33:38.079 --> 00:33:43.019
on other people. And to tear them down for just

00:33:43.019 --> 00:33:44.880
making a story that they're passionate about.

00:33:45.440 --> 00:33:47.039
Because it doesn't fit what you want. It's not

00:33:47.039 --> 00:33:50.400
your story, number one. Like, you don't have

00:33:50.400 --> 00:33:52.079
to enjoy it. You don't have to watch it or engage

00:33:52.079 --> 00:33:55.980
or consume it. It's not your story. Yeah. They

00:33:55.980 --> 00:33:57.319
should be allowed to do whatever the hell they

00:33:57.319 --> 00:34:00.559
want with their story. Yes. Unless somebody is

00:34:00.559 --> 00:34:02.779
writing a story that is to hurt others, like

00:34:02.779 --> 00:34:05.970
I always say, with harm to none. Unless you're

00:34:05.970 --> 00:34:08.710
going out of your way to be hateful and harmful,

00:34:08.710 --> 00:34:13.409
then that's a whole nother topic. If it's just

00:34:13.409 --> 00:34:17.369
a story, just let them tell their story. What

00:34:17.369 --> 00:34:22.710
is the problem? I don't get it. Yeah. I feel

00:34:22.710 --> 00:34:26.889
like what happens with a lot of beginner writers

00:34:26.889 --> 00:34:30.949
or beginner creators is because they don't have

00:34:30.949 --> 00:34:36.500
a lot of experience with LGBTQ People that's

00:34:36.500 --> 00:34:38.599
because you are one does not mean that you know

00:34:38.599 --> 00:34:42.059
the entire expansion. I'm a trans man That doesn't

00:34:42.059 --> 00:34:45.199
mean I understand all of the nuances that being

00:34:45.199 --> 00:34:48.840
a lesbian or just a gay woman or a bi woman is

00:34:48.840 --> 00:34:51.559
That's an entirely different part of the community

00:34:51.559 --> 00:34:56.179
Yeah, you only know your existence Exactly. So,

00:34:56.400 --> 00:34:58.699
you know your own stereotypes, but that doesn't

00:34:58.699 --> 00:35:02.019
mean that you don't know that thing. Sorry But

00:35:02.019 --> 00:35:04.980
that means that you don't know the stereotypes

00:35:04.980 --> 00:35:07.860
of others as well as you think you do. So I feel

00:35:07.860 --> 00:35:10.159
like that's something that a lot of people need

00:35:10.159 --> 00:35:14.920
to understand is if you're not part of that sexuality,

00:35:15.480 --> 00:35:18.099
there's gonna be stereotypes that you might accidentally

00:35:18.099 --> 00:35:22.300
be catering to that are toxic. Like what you

00:35:22.300 --> 00:35:25.340
said with the brunette and the blonde lesbian

00:35:25.340 --> 00:35:28.929
couple. I personally did not realize... that

00:35:28.929 --> 00:35:31.469
stereotype I did not until you've said it I was

00:35:31.469 --> 00:35:34.630
like oh my god no yeah that happens a lot yeah

00:35:34.630 --> 00:35:36.670
so that's like something to keep in mind or just

00:35:36.670 --> 00:35:40.730
oh my god yeah that's probably a stereotype I

00:35:40.730 --> 00:35:42.429
should be aware of that doesn't mean you have

00:35:42.429 --> 00:35:46.210
to avoid it it doesn't mean that doesn't happen

00:35:46.210 --> 00:35:48.769
like it happens yeah because it happens that's

00:35:48.769 --> 00:35:50.650
why they're stereotypes is because they happen

00:35:50.650 --> 00:35:55.650
but but the point is to develop beyond that stereotype

00:35:55.650 --> 00:35:59.510
right yeah okay so you have a brunette and a

00:35:59.510 --> 00:36:03.230
blonde and one's dominant, one's submissive,

00:36:03.269 --> 00:36:06.769
maybe give the dominant some softer points of

00:36:06.769 --> 00:36:10.150
their character, right? Maybe they talk to their

00:36:10.150 --> 00:36:13.349
plants, they're a plant mom, maybe the blonde

00:36:13.349 --> 00:36:17.369
boxes, right? You can add stuff to their characters

00:36:17.369 --> 00:36:20.329
that make them more than those stereotypes of

00:36:20.329 --> 00:36:22.849
dominant versus submissive. I think that's something

00:36:22.849 --> 00:36:26.409
that a lot of people need to understand is these

00:36:26.480 --> 00:36:30.300
queer characters are characters first, right?

00:36:30.300 --> 00:36:33.260
And they are gonna need habits, they're gonna

00:36:33.260 --> 00:36:36.079
need motivation, they're gonna need likes and

00:36:36.079 --> 00:36:38.159
dislikes, and you can choose those. They are

00:36:38.159 --> 00:36:41.159
not preset. You can choose those to give them

00:36:41.159 --> 00:36:47.420
the depth and the juxtaposition to their identity,

00:36:48.360 --> 00:36:53.340
to give them that more fleshed out, rounded appearance.

00:36:53.400 --> 00:36:57.050
Because I feel like a lot of... bad representation

00:36:57.050 --> 00:37:01.530
of LGBT fall victim to just bad writing. Whereas

00:37:01.530 --> 00:37:08.010
it's not good. It's just not good. Like in Faultran,

00:37:08.369 --> 00:37:11.090
one of the characters, Shiro, is revealed to

00:37:11.090 --> 00:37:13.889
have left behind a husband, but we don't realize

00:37:13.889 --> 00:37:17.090
that he's gay or has a husband until literally

00:37:17.090 --> 00:37:20.070
we come back to Earth and he's, oh my God, my

00:37:20.070 --> 00:37:23.469
husband. And it's what? This entire time, like

00:37:23.469 --> 00:37:26.239
he didn't have any hints. He didn't look at any

00:37:26.239 --> 00:37:28.739
men. There was no back in the background. He's,

00:37:28.900 --> 00:37:30.500
oh, that's a very attractive guy. Like there

00:37:30.500 --> 00:37:33.440
was no hints. It was just like gay. And it's

00:37:33.440 --> 00:37:36.400
okay. That's bad writing. Okay. You just made

00:37:36.400 --> 00:37:39.380
him gay because you wanted to fill out your gay

00:37:39.380 --> 00:37:42.420
bingo card. You wanted to click off your free

00:37:42.420 --> 00:37:46.300
gay coupon. That's bad writing. That's not good

00:37:46.300 --> 00:37:48.840
because it's not part of the character that you've

00:37:48.840 --> 00:37:51.719
known since the beginning. You can put in hints

00:37:51.719 --> 00:37:54.619
and then reveal later, hey, I have a husband.

00:37:54.960 --> 00:37:59.460
because it's, oh, in season three, he was standing

00:37:59.460 --> 00:38:03.300
next to a rainbow or he was being flirted with

00:38:03.300 --> 00:38:06.380
by a gay alien or like a masculine alien. There

00:38:06.380 --> 00:38:10.099
is ways you can hint at the fact that this character

00:38:10.099 --> 00:38:13.519
is gay and then do a reveal later. Or even if

00:38:13.519 --> 00:38:17.079
they're bi, who's to say even if the main character

00:38:17.079 --> 00:38:20.780
is a man into another man that they can't also

00:38:20.780 --> 00:38:23.659
like women? or like other genders. Is that a

00:38:23.659 --> 00:38:25.300
race, the fact that they're attracted to men?

00:38:25.599 --> 00:38:29.119
No. Means they're attracted to whoever the hell

00:38:29.119 --> 00:38:31.699
they want to be attracted to. That's just how

00:38:31.699 --> 00:38:35.300
it is. Like, they can be multi -faceted like

00:38:35.300 --> 00:38:37.940
people. Just because the main characters are

00:38:37.940 --> 00:38:40.760
heterosexual presenting doesn't mean that one

00:38:40.760 --> 00:38:43.380
of them hasn't dated at the other sex before

00:38:43.380 --> 00:38:47.219
or the same sex before. Like, it's really not

00:38:47.219 --> 00:38:51.190
that black and white. Like you can't just make

00:38:51.190 --> 00:38:53.650
those assumptions. It's something like characters

00:38:53.650 --> 00:38:58.570
have to be explored and have to be learned and

00:38:58.570 --> 00:39:03.190
they have to be Like I don't know if the right

00:39:03.190 --> 00:39:07.070
word would be but they need to be explored as

00:39:07.070 --> 00:39:11.090
more than What want or need them to be to fit

00:39:11.090 --> 00:39:13.269
your narrative? That's not what they're there

00:39:13.269 --> 00:39:17.769
for they're there to tell a story like People

00:39:17.769 --> 00:39:19.750
aren't here to fit your narrative. People are

00:39:19.750 --> 00:39:22.889
here to do what they are meant to do when they

00:39:22.889 --> 00:39:26.130
are born. Like, they're not here to do whatever

00:39:26.130 --> 00:39:29.150
it is to appease you. And that's why all of this,

00:39:29.150 --> 00:39:31.889
like, discrimination and bullshit happening in

00:39:31.889 --> 00:39:35.989
the world is terrible. Like, we try so hard to

00:39:35.989 --> 00:39:39.150
control the narrative and to control other people.

00:39:39.550 --> 00:39:42.210
Have we not learned at this point? That doesn't

00:39:42.210 --> 00:39:47.150
work. It just makes things awful. for everybody.

00:39:48.550 --> 00:39:52.110
And so why are we putting that on even the smallest

00:39:52.110 --> 00:39:56.110
of things, which is like media, which a lot of

00:39:56.110 --> 00:39:59.250
times is fiction, like fake characters who don't

00:39:59.250 --> 00:40:01.369
really exist, who aren't real, who are like an

00:40:01.369 --> 00:40:04.650
alien or something like, and getting so upset

00:40:04.650 --> 00:40:06.409
that they're not identifying the way that you

00:40:06.409 --> 00:40:11.710
want them to. That's delulu. Yeah. Like just

00:40:11.710 --> 00:40:15.039
let people tell their stories and If there's

00:40:15.039 --> 00:40:19.260
something truly wrong with the story, you can

00:40:19.260 --> 00:40:22.500
leave constructive criticism, but that constructive

00:40:22.500 --> 00:40:24.559
criticism should be constructive. It shouldn't

00:40:24.559 --> 00:40:29.119
just be like, I don't like this character because

00:40:29.119 --> 00:40:33.599
X, Y, Z, and because they said they're gay, but

00:40:33.599 --> 00:40:37.139
their boyfriend looks like this. It's just the

00:40:37.139 --> 00:40:40.699
simple things that I can't even fathom sometimes

00:40:40.699 --> 00:40:42.599
when I'm thinking about them that people come

00:40:42.599 --> 00:40:46.920
up with. It just seems like it's just silly and

00:40:46.920 --> 00:40:49.420
people want to find something to be upset about

00:40:49.420 --> 00:40:53.659
or complain about instead of just enjoying the

00:40:53.659 --> 00:40:57.960
media and the story for what it is. And if you

00:40:57.960 --> 00:41:00.639
don't like the story, that's different. If you

00:41:00.639 --> 00:41:02.599
have a friend who's a writer and they come to

00:41:02.599 --> 00:41:05.199
you like, hey, give me your thoughts. That's

00:41:05.199 --> 00:41:08.579
awesome. Give them your thoughts. Tell them what

00:41:08.579 --> 00:41:10.280
you think about it. That doesn't mean that they

00:41:10.280 --> 00:41:13.800
have to take what you say. and put it into their

00:41:13.800 --> 00:41:16.960
story. That's their story. Yeah. But if they're

00:41:16.960 --> 00:41:18.940
asking for your feedback, like, you can always

00:41:18.940 --> 00:41:22.719
tell them, hey, this might cater to this stereotype,

00:41:22.760 --> 00:41:26.320
or this might not be the best way to reveal a

00:41:26.320 --> 00:41:30.000
character as a husband. Like, it... Yeah. There's

00:41:30.000 --> 00:41:31.719
so many different ways that you can go about

00:41:31.719 --> 00:41:34.079
things without just straight up attacking it

00:41:34.079 --> 00:41:37.500
and saying that it's a bad representation. Yeah.

00:41:39.260 --> 00:41:43.429
So... I agree. And this is going to probably

00:41:43.429 --> 00:41:49.610
rock the boat a little bit. Oh, no. But. Yeah,

00:41:51.789 --> 00:41:56.309
it's time for me to be up on my soapbox for my

00:41:56.309 --> 00:42:00.690
hot take. I feel like a lot of people focus so

00:42:00.690 --> 00:42:06.150
much on romantic ships and romantic stuff that

00:42:06.150 --> 00:42:11.219
they just completely bypass platonic Anything

00:42:11.219 --> 00:42:14.840
and it bothers me a lot. I feel like we use there

00:42:14.840 --> 00:42:19.500
are a lot of Animes I'll say that have very strong

00:42:19.500 --> 00:42:23.239
rivalries between two male characters, right?

00:42:23.360 --> 00:42:28.159
Yes that's just how rivalry works is you compete

00:42:28.159 --> 00:42:31.039
and a lot of people will take those rivalries

00:42:31.039 --> 00:42:36.019
and They will amp it up to be romantic. That

00:42:36.019 --> 00:42:38.860
doesn't mean I'm not saying that they can't be

00:42:38.800 --> 00:42:41.119
I'm not saying that they aren't sparked. What

00:42:41.119 --> 00:42:45.300
I mean is sometimes the curtains are just blue,

00:42:45.539 --> 00:42:48.900
guys. Sometimes they're just really best friends.

00:42:49.539 --> 00:42:52.360
Sometimes there's a deeper meaning. Like, look,

00:42:52.619 --> 00:42:55.820
read between the lines. Maybe it is romantic,

00:42:55.900 --> 00:42:58.260
but is there something else contributing to it?

00:42:58.480 --> 00:43:00.980
It's not solely just, but me want to bang this

00:43:00.980 --> 00:43:04.460
person. Yeah. And I feel like it also just...

00:43:04.320 --> 00:43:07.780
really dumbs down how important friendships are.

00:43:08.019 --> 00:43:10.400
I don't know if you've ever had a good friend,

00:43:10.460 --> 00:43:13.320
but sometimes you just want to you would die

00:43:13.320 --> 00:43:19.019
for them. You would do anything like, OK. Oh,

00:43:19.199 --> 00:43:22.440
my God. Not to get all Naruto and Sasuke about

00:43:22.440 --> 00:43:25.460
it, but fuck, I'd chase you down for three fucking

00:43:25.460 --> 00:43:29.480
years to bring you home if I had to. Oh, shit.

00:43:31.360 --> 00:43:36.289
But like sometimes. you care about people so

00:43:36.289 --> 00:43:39.869
much. Yeah. And it can be romantic, but it can

00:43:39.869 --> 00:43:44.469
also be platonic. It can also just be because

00:43:44.469 --> 00:43:48.409
they're your family, because you love them so

00:43:48.409 --> 00:43:51.349
much. And I feel like that is a nuance that gets

00:43:51.349 --> 00:43:56.909
lost a lot is as someone who is asexual. I have

00:43:56.909 --> 00:44:01.010
a lot of struggle figuring out platonic versus

00:44:01.010 --> 00:44:03.610
romantic feelings sometimes. because I could

00:44:03.610 --> 00:44:07.210
feel so strongly for someone. I care about them

00:44:07.210 --> 00:44:12.769
so much that my brain is like, is this technically

00:44:12.769 --> 00:44:16.650
romantic enough? I've had many crushes on people

00:44:16.650 --> 00:44:20.150
where it would be like - I am confessing to me

00:44:20.150 --> 00:44:23.670
right now. No, no. We are both married. Don't

00:44:23.670 --> 00:44:26.030
be weird. I don't know if that was a bit or not.

00:44:26.949 --> 00:44:33.280
It's just dead air. You really did. I am in utter

00:44:33.280 --> 00:44:37.119
shock. I'm like, oh my God. You know what, Rae?

00:44:37.159 --> 00:44:39.880
Not everything is about you. Yeah, you're right.

00:44:40.780 --> 00:44:42.920
I'm going to go do some self -reflection. Be

00:44:42.920 --> 00:44:45.420
right back. Yeah, you go sit and do self -reflection.

00:44:45.539 --> 00:44:47.500
I'm going to continue standing on my soapbox.

00:44:47.719 --> 00:44:50.960
That's right. Do that. Yeah. You go reflect.

00:44:51.579 --> 00:44:57.699
Okay. All right. But yeah, I have struggles with

00:44:57.699 --> 00:45:01.219
platonic versus romantic relations. Yeah. Feelings

00:45:01.219 --> 00:45:03.900
and stuff. And that has always been a struggle

00:45:03.900 --> 00:45:07.480
with me. I have fallen, quote unquote, in and

00:45:07.480 --> 00:45:10.579
out of love with friends before being like, oh,

00:45:10.579 --> 00:45:12.719
my God, I care about them so much. I clearly

00:45:12.719 --> 00:45:15.119
have a crush on them. And then either I confess

00:45:15.119 --> 00:45:18.219
or I don't or like nothing happens. And then

00:45:18.219 --> 00:45:20.320
the feelings go away or they go back to normal.

00:45:20.400 --> 00:45:22.940
And it's just, oh, no, it was just platonic.

00:45:23.000 --> 00:45:26.480
It was just very strong platonic. And I feel

00:45:26.480 --> 00:45:31.679
like there's an entire subsection. in queer relationships,

00:45:31.860 --> 00:45:34.360
where it's just queer platonic relationships.

00:45:34.599 --> 00:45:37.579
Like love is just love, man. Love is just love.

00:45:37.639 --> 00:45:42.940
You can just love people. And only you can define

00:45:42.940 --> 00:45:45.679
what that love is and only you can define whether

00:45:45.679 --> 00:45:47.780
or not that's romantic or platonic. But I feel

00:45:47.780 --> 00:45:51.420
like there's not enough emphasis on platonic

00:45:51.420 --> 00:45:56.119
love and how important it is and how big it is.

00:45:56.440 --> 00:45:58.940
because people will take those moments out of

00:45:58.940 --> 00:46:01.340
context and be like, oh, see, clearly they love

00:46:01.340 --> 00:46:04.500
each other because they hugged for three point

00:46:04.500 --> 00:46:07.000
five seconds. Or they're like flirting with each

00:46:07.000 --> 00:46:09.059
other. And that obviously means that they like

00:46:09.059 --> 00:46:11.260
each other. I'm like, do you know how many times

00:46:11.260 --> 00:46:14.519
my friend of I'm not going to drop names, but

00:46:14.519 --> 00:46:17.480
I have a very longtime friend who we're like,

00:46:17.599 --> 00:46:20.800
what's up? It's just how we talk to each other.

00:46:20.880 --> 00:46:23.059
And it's always been that way. Does that mean

00:46:23.059 --> 00:46:25.019
that we actually have feelings for each other?

00:46:25.179 --> 00:46:27.679
No. Does that mean that I would die for this

00:46:27.679 --> 00:46:30.480
person because they're like my rock and like

00:46:30.480 --> 00:46:33.840
a platonic soulmate? Yes. That doesn't mean that

00:46:33.840 --> 00:46:36.960
I'm going to go to bed with them. It's things

00:46:36.960 --> 00:46:39.340
that are so simple as you could be close to somebody

00:46:39.340 --> 00:46:42.199
and your relationship can be different for each

00:46:42.199 --> 00:46:44.300
friendship or each relationship. They can be

00:46:44.300 --> 00:46:46.920
completely different just because somebody doesn't

00:46:46.920 --> 00:46:50.980
like it or doesn't understand it doesn't make

00:46:50.980 --> 00:46:54.519
it. less authentic for you, but it also doesn't

00:46:54.519 --> 00:46:57.280
mean that you get to assume what those people's

00:46:57.280 --> 00:46:59.679
intentions are. Their friendship is their own.

00:47:00.079 --> 00:47:02.360
So you need to let them have that. You can ask

00:47:02.360 --> 00:47:06.320
questions, but like, you can't just come to conclusions

00:47:06.320 --> 00:47:09.699
about people based on your own bias. That's ridiculous.

00:47:10.500 --> 00:47:13.409
Yeah. And it's like a lot of people, like with

00:47:13.409 --> 00:47:15.050
straight couples, it's like, why can't a man

00:47:15.050 --> 00:47:18.530
and a woman just be friends? OK, can we have

00:47:18.530 --> 00:47:21.789
that same energy for gay people, please? Same

00:47:21.789 --> 00:47:24.750
sex friends? Yeah. Or same gender friends? Like

00:47:24.750 --> 00:47:28.469
you can't sometimes. Yes, sometimes it is romantic.

00:47:28.789 --> 00:47:31.530
Sometimes we get a kiss on screen. We are now

00:47:31.530 --> 00:47:34.409
in the modern times, people. We can get gay kisses

00:47:34.409 --> 00:47:39.090
on stream, not stream, on screen. That too, but

00:47:39.090 --> 00:47:44.920
yeah. now that we're allowed to be gay on screen

00:47:44.920 --> 00:47:47.719
and get our kisses on screen can we go back to

00:47:47.719 --> 00:47:51.119
being like sometimes boys are just friends sometimes

00:47:51.119 --> 00:47:54.699
girls are just friends because we are able to

00:47:54.699 --> 00:47:57.480
get those kisses on screen yeah yes some of them

00:47:57.480 --> 00:48:00.340
are a little like harder to get like with what

00:48:00.340 --> 00:48:03.889
was it called The Owl House, that series was

00:48:03.889 --> 00:48:07.429
cut short by Disney despite having a huge fan

00:48:07.429 --> 00:48:11.130
audience. Yeah. Because the writers were like,

00:48:11.510 --> 00:48:13.750
we're not going to cut out the gay. We're not

00:48:13.750 --> 00:48:18.469
going to make the lesbian couple not be gay.

00:48:18.989 --> 00:48:22.130
And so they smushed it all in one season and

00:48:22.130 --> 00:48:24.789
it was like a great season. It was great. So

00:48:24.789 --> 00:48:26.489
yeah, there is going to be some censorship, but

00:48:26.489 --> 00:48:29.949
it's also in the power of the creators to stand

00:48:29.949 --> 00:48:32.550
their ground and be like, okay, we'll rush it,

00:48:32.550 --> 00:48:34.110
but they're still going to fucking kiss in the

00:48:34.110 --> 00:48:37.070
end. Right. Fuck you. Yeah, it reminds me of

00:48:37.070 --> 00:48:40.289
Legend of Korra, like at the end of that, because

00:48:40.289 --> 00:48:42.730
I was like, they like faded away. I was like,

00:48:43.329 --> 00:48:47.550
I was so upset because I was like, listen, like

00:48:47.550 --> 00:48:50.210
you've been hinting at this. Is this like a friendship?

00:48:50.349 --> 00:48:52.880
And that's again. I can understand how people

00:48:52.880 --> 00:48:54.820
get so invested and then they're like, you gotta

00:48:54.820 --> 00:48:57.519
give me answers. No, they don't. You can draw

00:48:57.519 --> 00:49:00.199
your own conclusion, but at the same time, like

00:49:00.199 --> 00:49:04.760
there's two sides and both sides are valid, right?

00:49:04.940 --> 00:49:08.460
So they can be like, oh, I'm upset that you were

00:49:08.460 --> 00:49:10.739
leading up to this and giving me the assumption

00:49:10.739 --> 00:49:12.800
that they were gonna kiss or giving me the assumption

00:49:12.800 --> 00:49:14.880
that they were gonna be together and then you

00:49:14.880 --> 00:49:18.480
didn't clarify. But then again, it's almost like

00:49:18.480 --> 00:49:23.340
on the opposite end of that, argument, maybe

00:49:23.340 --> 00:49:25.900
they didn't show it because that's for their

00:49:25.900 --> 00:49:29.239
life to know, you know what I mean? For those

00:49:29.239 --> 00:49:34.460
characters to end the series the way that they're

00:49:34.460 --> 00:49:39.179
going to end it. And it's not always satisfying

00:49:39.179 --> 00:49:43.300
to people who feel like they got teased, but

00:49:43.300 --> 00:49:47.519
it's, in a way, think about it as a real life

00:49:47.519 --> 00:49:50.239
situation. You're not going to know specifically.

00:49:50.510 --> 00:49:52.550
everything about that person's relationship,

00:49:52.650 --> 00:49:54.570
or what they're gonna do, or how they're feeling.

00:49:55.150 --> 00:49:59.190
And it's nobody's business. So in a way, they

00:49:59.190 --> 00:50:01.769
ended it like, make your own assumption, but

00:50:01.769 --> 00:50:05.250
it's none of your business. Like, whatever happens

00:50:05.250 --> 00:50:07.590
between these two. You can draw your own conclusion,

00:50:07.690 --> 00:50:11.110
but this is just how it ended. Maybe they don't

00:50:11.110 --> 00:50:13.269
know. Maybe they're holding hands because they're

00:50:13.269 --> 00:50:15.530
besties. We don't know. Maybe it's platonic.

00:50:15.849 --> 00:50:18.090
And maybe it's romantic. We don't know that.

00:50:18.889 --> 00:50:21.739
But... What gives us the right to demand that

00:50:21.739 --> 00:50:26.380
explanation? Just let them exist and be in their

00:50:26.380 --> 00:50:32.139
own authentic fiction realities. And personally,

00:50:32.179 --> 00:50:34.599
in my opinion, I'm still on my soapbox with my

00:50:34.599 --> 00:50:37.300
bad opinions. Who said there were bad opinions?

00:50:37.760 --> 00:50:41.260
Ah, no, there are hot opinions. Okay. I don't

00:50:41.260 --> 00:50:43.820
know if this is a hot opinion, but I would rather

00:50:43.820 --> 00:50:48.739
have a gay ship be in the series non -canon.

00:50:48.889 --> 00:50:53.769
than have a canon ending, just because that way

00:50:53.769 --> 00:50:56.750
it's up to the fans who make them gay or not.

00:50:56.750 --> 00:50:59.650
It's up to you. If you want to make the two boys

00:50:59.650 --> 00:51:03.449
kiss as adults, go for it. If you want to make

00:51:03.449 --> 00:51:07.449
the two girls kiss, go ahead. Fan fiction, bro.

00:51:08.010 --> 00:51:11.909
Like fan fiction, fan art. Yeah. Works fan fan

00:51:11.909 --> 00:51:16.469
projects. You can make fucking Sasuke and Naruto

00:51:16.469 --> 00:51:20.570
kiss if you want. Guys, no one's stopping you.

00:51:20.610 --> 00:51:23.349
I don't care if they have wives. They can kiss

00:51:23.349 --> 00:51:27.349
on the DL. That's what fan fiction is for. That's

00:51:27.349 --> 00:51:31.829
what fan works are for, is for people to just

00:51:31.829 --> 00:51:35.349
have fun and do whatever they want. This is not

00:51:35.349 --> 00:51:38.570
me saying that, oh, I don't want any gay rep

00:51:38.570 --> 00:51:41.909
at all. I want good gay rep. I want intentional

00:51:41.909 --> 00:51:47.599
gay rep. I want a rep that is intentional. that

00:51:47.599 --> 00:51:51.960
means something that is important to the character.

00:51:52.659 --> 00:51:56.840
I want it to be both implicit, but explicit at

00:51:56.840 --> 00:52:01.480
the same time. It doesn't have to be in my face,

00:52:01.519 --> 00:52:05.000
but I want it to be obvious enough. That's what

00:52:05.000 --> 00:52:11.159
subtext is for. Use it. Guys, use it. I do not

00:52:11.159 --> 00:52:13.739
need to have every introduction of every queer

00:52:13.739 --> 00:52:17.179
person in every queer character to be like, hi,

00:52:17.219 --> 00:52:21.099
I'm Melissa. I'm a lesbian. Show me. Don't tell

00:52:21.099 --> 00:52:25.500
me. Show me through her countless list of exes

00:52:25.500 --> 00:52:28.900
that all have feminine names. Show me through

00:52:28.900 --> 00:52:33.719
a little pride flag pin on her poster board in

00:52:33.719 --> 00:52:37.320
the background. It does not have to be explicit.

00:52:37.639 --> 00:52:41.559
You can imply it. It's not that hard, guys. It's

00:52:41.559 --> 00:52:47.659
really not that hard to make it good. Just make

00:52:47.659 --> 00:52:50.719
it good. That's all I want. All I want is good.

00:52:51.619 --> 00:52:53.579
I don't care what form it takes. I just want

00:52:53.579 --> 00:52:57.500
it to be good. Yeah. And that's what's important,

00:52:57.500 --> 00:53:00.559
right? And I think everybody can also draw their

00:53:00.559 --> 00:53:02.900
own conclusions on to them what's good and what's

00:53:02.900 --> 00:53:07.130
not. And that can be subjective. I think in a

00:53:07.130 --> 00:53:10.309
lot of our podcasts the underlying common denominator

00:53:10.309 --> 00:53:12.929
of everything is just try to approach things

00:53:12.929 --> 00:53:16.110
with kindness and understanding instead of I

00:53:16.110 --> 00:53:18.530
need to find a reason to be angry at this and

00:53:18.530 --> 00:53:20.349
I need to find a reason to spread negativity

00:53:20.349 --> 00:53:22.710
and hate because that just doesn't help anybody

00:53:22.710 --> 00:53:28.019
and If you can try to live life a little lighter

00:53:28.019 --> 00:53:31.199
if you can try to find the joy and the positivity

00:53:31.199 --> 00:53:34.059
and things Not saying like toxic positivity.

00:53:34.099 --> 00:53:36.320
You don't need to be like everything is great

00:53:36.320 --> 00:53:39.440
all the time because that's not realistic but

00:53:39.440 --> 00:53:43.119
trying to have the balance of dissecting things

00:53:43.119 --> 00:53:45.639
and like really focusing on how it's making you

00:53:45.639 --> 00:53:49.320
feel why it's making you feel that way and if

00:53:49.320 --> 00:53:51.539
this is something that you truly like if this

00:53:51.539 --> 00:53:53.820
is a hill you really want to die on is it worth

00:53:53.820 --> 00:53:57.780
it or Is this just something that because of

00:53:57.780 --> 00:53:59.380
something that you've gone through or something

00:53:59.380 --> 00:54:02.480
internally with you that's bothering you? Like,

00:54:02.920 --> 00:54:08.119
it's so much deeper than any of us think. And

00:54:08.119 --> 00:54:10.900
the black and white version of, yes, we need

00:54:10.900 --> 00:54:14.940
more representation and diversity in all media,

00:54:16.199 --> 00:54:20.599
in musicals, in plays, in all performances, in

00:54:20.599 --> 00:54:25.820
art, in literature. There's always room for more

00:54:25.820 --> 00:54:28.400
diversity. It's never gonna be at like a cap.

00:54:28.760 --> 00:54:32.059
There's always room for more. The more that we

00:54:32.059 --> 00:54:35.639
stigmatize it and put all of these expectations

00:54:35.639 --> 00:54:38.400
on it, the harder it's gonna be to give all of

00:54:38.400 --> 00:54:40.579
that representation. The harder it's gonna be

00:54:40.579 --> 00:54:42.800
for people to feel like they can authentically

00:54:42.800 --> 00:54:46.679
just put those out and have them be received

00:54:46.679 --> 00:54:49.059
in a positive light. It doesn't mean that you

00:54:49.059 --> 00:54:51.800
can't criticize them if there's things to criticize

00:54:51.800 --> 00:54:54.320
or you're allowed to have your opinions and you're

00:54:54.320 --> 00:54:57.579
valid in your opinions, but you need to also

00:54:57.579 --> 00:55:00.380
like try to figure out if this is something that

00:55:00.380 --> 00:55:02.800
you're coming at from, I'm just doing this because

00:55:02.800 --> 00:55:05.380
I want something to be angry and mean towards,

00:55:05.599 --> 00:55:07.780
or am I actually trying to help this creator

00:55:07.780 --> 00:55:12.400
have a different perspective? Or provide some

00:55:12.400 --> 00:55:14.539
kind of insight that might help. There's been

00:55:14.539 --> 00:55:17.400
a lot of times in my writing where my friends

00:55:17.400 --> 00:55:21.699
have like peer edited or looked at my work and

00:55:21.699 --> 00:55:24.099
have told me things where I'm like, oh, I didn't

00:55:24.099 --> 00:55:26.579
think about it that way. Or, oh, that's a good

00:55:26.579 --> 00:55:29.599
idea. Or even me going, no, that's not what I

00:55:29.599 --> 00:55:33.940
want. It's any of those things where the communication

00:55:33.940 --> 00:55:35.960
and the conversation that happens around these

00:55:35.960 --> 00:55:39.260
things, it doesn't need to be taken so like,

00:55:39.460 --> 00:55:43.000
it's like a, it's either a fight or it's not.

00:55:43.599 --> 00:55:45.920
It just needs to be a conversation. It doesn't

00:55:45.920 --> 00:55:49.469
need to be so serious. Just have a conversation

00:55:49.469 --> 00:55:54.429
and have open communication. Try not to use hurtful

00:55:54.429 --> 00:55:58.289
language. Try not to tear projects down because

00:55:58.289 --> 00:56:01.389
they do something that you don't agree with because

00:56:01.389 --> 00:56:04.989
it might be somebody else's like safety. There

00:56:04.989 --> 00:56:07.929
might be a piece of literature or media that

00:56:07.929 --> 00:56:13.130
you hate. And that is like somebody's safety.

00:56:13.989 --> 00:56:18.400
And by you tearing that down needlessly, you're

00:56:18.400 --> 00:56:21.079
indirectly harming the people that it really

00:56:21.079 --> 00:56:24.440
helps and that really care about it. And then

00:56:24.440 --> 00:56:26.860
it's taking away that enjoyment for people who

00:56:26.860 --> 00:56:30.559
enjoy it. Like the same thing with fandoms. People

00:56:30.559 --> 00:56:33.920
get so angry at people for being in specific

00:56:33.920 --> 00:56:37.960
fandoms that it's like, we can't just as a human

00:56:37.960 --> 00:56:42.559
race, as a society, just let people live and

00:56:42.559 --> 00:56:46.619
let people enjoy things. And with harm to none,

00:56:46.760 --> 00:56:49.699
not doing anything to hurt people and going out

00:56:49.699 --> 00:56:52.679
of their way to do bad things, letting people

00:56:52.679 --> 00:56:56.460
have their own interests and have their own ideas

00:56:56.460 --> 00:56:58.760
of what makes them happy and that not be something

00:56:58.760 --> 00:57:01.360
that you have to correct because it doesn't suit

00:57:01.360 --> 00:57:05.360
your narrative. Yeah. That's taking enjoyment

00:57:05.360 --> 00:57:07.079
away from other people's and there's already

00:57:07.079 --> 00:57:09.940
so much negativity in the world that we don't

00:57:09.940 --> 00:57:13.460
need that. trying to come at it from an air of

00:57:13.460 --> 00:57:15.880
understanding, even saying, I don't agree with

00:57:15.880 --> 00:57:18.460
you. If you enjoy it, awesome. I'm happy for

00:57:18.460 --> 00:57:22.400
you. It's that simple of saying, I hate this

00:57:22.400 --> 00:57:25.159
actor because X, Y, Z. I don't like their work.

00:57:25.320 --> 00:57:28.719
I think that they're not funny. Doesn't mean

00:57:28.719 --> 00:57:30.639
that somebody else doesn't really like that actor

00:57:30.639 --> 00:57:33.199
or that actor isn't a person who has a family.

00:57:33.960 --> 00:57:38.679
Yeah. It's very, there's a lot of different layers

00:57:38.679 --> 00:57:42.849
that go into it. Most of our podcasts surrounds

00:57:42.849 --> 00:57:47.070
that of the topics that we discussed. There's

00:57:47.070 --> 00:57:49.329
so many layers to it that you can't just say

00:57:49.329 --> 00:57:53.369
yes or no to one side or the other because that's

00:57:53.369 --> 00:57:57.050
not how life is. It's a communication and a conversation

00:57:57.050 --> 00:58:00.210
of this is why it's confusing to be a human.

00:58:01.550 --> 00:58:04.909
And this is why it's interesting to have conversations

00:58:04.909 --> 00:58:07.090
about these things because you want to be validating

00:58:07.090 --> 00:58:09.840
of how people feel and how they think. At the

00:58:09.840 --> 00:58:13.099
same time, you want to correct issues that could

00:58:13.099 --> 00:58:16.179
be damaging to society. And then on the other

00:58:16.179 --> 00:58:18.980
side of that, who decides what's damaging and

00:58:18.980 --> 00:58:23.159
who decides what's not. So it's a constant endless

00:58:23.159 --> 00:58:26.320
loop of just people having the conversations

00:58:26.320 --> 00:58:30.960
that need to be had and having them with an air

00:58:30.960 --> 00:58:34.739
of understanding and respect and not coming at

00:58:34.739 --> 00:58:37.869
it from... You don't agree with me on this, so

00:58:37.869 --> 00:58:40.050
you're canceled, you're horrible, blah, blah,

00:58:40.130 --> 00:58:42.650
blah. We need to get to a place as a society

00:58:42.650 --> 00:58:44.570
where we can just have conversations with each

00:58:44.570 --> 00:58:47.409
other and disagree if we need to, but that doesn't

00:58:47.409 --> 00:58:51.250
turn into hate. The disagreements don't need

00:58:51.250 --> 00:58:57.630
to turn into hate. That's not necessary. You

00:58:57.630 --> 00:58:59.989
can disagree with people, like when you were

00:58:59.989 --> 00:59:02.780
kids, somebody... Wanted to play blocks with

00:59:02.780 --> 00:59:04.960
you and you said no, I'm never gonna play with

00:59:04.960 --> 00:59:07.039
you again. You didn't want to play blocks with

00:59:07.039 --> 00:59:09.139
me I hate you and I'm gonna go tell all the other

00:59:09.139 --> 00:59:13.400
kids in daycare that you're mean It's like that

00:59:13.400 --> 00:59:16.579
kind of mindset where it we're adults now we

00:59:16.579 --> 00:59:18.699
can have conversations that disagree with each

00:59:18.699 --> 00:59:20.780
other without it turning into something dramatic,

00:59:20.860 --> 00:59:26.800
so It's I think that's important to have conversations

00:59:26.800 --> 00:59:29.639
like these that are difficult and it feels like

00:59:29.639 --> 00:59:32.599
sometimes we're talking about something and then

00:59:32.599 --> 00:59:34.300
going back on it and then going forward and then

00:59:34.300 --> 00:59:36.599
going back and it's interesting when you think

00:59:36.599 --> 00:59:40.719
about it because it's There's no clear answer

00:59:40.719 --> 00:59:48.199
to any problem There's only what we can do to

00:59:48.199 --> 00:59:52.300
continue moving forward and trying our best to

00:59:52.300 --> 00:59:56.599
improve the quality of life that we have in the

00:59:56.599 --> 00:59:58.960
quality of life of the people around us with

00:59:58.960 --> 01:00:05.739
love and light and not damaging words and painful

01:00:05.739 --> 01:00:08.360
actions. Like, it doesn't need to get to that

01:00:08.360 --> 01:00:10.659
point, but because we're inherently flawed as

01:00:10.659 --> 01:00:15.059
people, I don't think, like, having that mindset

01:00:15.059 --> 01:00:18.739
is gonna come naturally to everyone in the world,

01:00:19.019 --> 01:00:22.539
if even a select few people. It really takes

01:00:22.539 --> 01:00:26.440
a lot of life experience and soul searching and,

01:00:26.440 --> 01:00:31.250
I would argue, therapy to... challenge the way

01:00:31.250 --> 01:00:35.070
that you see things and give you new perspectives.

01:00:35.949 --> 01:00:37.750
Sit down with people who are different than you.

01:00:37.829 --> 01:00:40.150
Sit down with people who have had different upbringings,

01:00:40.289 --> 01:00:43.750
who are different culturally, who are different

01:00:43.750 --> 01:00:48.050
in any kind of way. Have like open conversations

01:00:48.050 --> 01:00:51.050
with them about it. And instead of saying, oh,

01:00:51.590 --> 01:00:54.110
I don't agree with that. Now we can't have the

01:00:54.110 --> 01:00:57.079
conversation anymore. ask more questions, ask

01:00:57.079 --> 01:00:59.320
why, try to understand, and then the same thing

01:00:59.320 --> 01:01:02.780
for them towards you. Having that communication

01:01:02.780 --> 01:01:06.300
is really important in how we can learn about

01:01:06.300 --> 01:01:09.239
each other and come together more instead of

01:01:09.239 --> 01:01:14.960
it always turning into an us versus them. I'm

01:01:14.960 --> 01:01:19.239
off my soapbox now. I just booted you off and

01:01:19.239 --> 01:01:21.619
I was like, okay, hold on. Okay, my turn. No,

01:01:21.639 --> 01:01:24.780
it's okay. I stepped down a while ago. You got

01:01:24.780 --> 01:01:28.360
it. Thanks, yeah. It's something too, because

01:01:28.360 --> 01:01:31.480
I, for the longest time, I didn't do live streams

01:01:31.480 --> 01:01:33.980
or anything like that because I always was so

01:01:33.980 --> 01:01:36.300
subconscious that anything I said was going to

01:01:36.300 --> 01:01:39.559
be taken and taken out of context and twisted

01:01:39.559 --> 01:01:42.920
to make me look a certain way or it's you turn

01:01:42.920 --> 01:01:45.429
people against me and... It took a little while

01:01:45.429 --> 01:01:48.409
for me to really sit with it and then talk to

01:01:48.409 --> 01:01:52.409
my therapist about it, but it's crazy because

01:01:52.409 --> 01:01:58.170
you can't please everybody. You cannot. You just

01:01:58.170 --> 01:02:01.010
have to tell yourself that people are going to

01:02:01.010 --> 01:02:03.369
be how they're going to be. As long as you are

01:02:03.369 --> 01:02:06.170
doing your best every single day and putting

01:02:06.170 --> 01:02:09.070
your best foot forward, trying to do good things

01:02:09.070 --> 01:02:12.150
and not going out of your way to be harmful.

01:02:14.360 --> 01:02:16.780
Then if people are going to be negative, then

01:02:16.780 --> 01:02:18.519
that's something that they need to work on within

01:02:18.519 --> 01:02:20.679
themselves. They need to reflect on, they need

01:02:20.679 --> 01:02:25.880
to have more life experience that offers a different

01:02:25.880 --> 01:02:29.000
crossroads to them to say, you can continue down

01:02:29.000 --> 01:02:32.360
this path or you can change your thinking and

01:02:32.360 --> 01:02:36.440
maybe improve and go down this other way, this

01:02:36.440 --> 01:02:39.739
other path. I would always say challenging my

01:02:39.739 --> 01:02:43.000
own thoughts. has been really helpful because

01:02:43.000 --> 01:02:45.940
now I can do these podcasts. And I do still have

01:02:45.940 --> 01:02:48.420
that little voice in the back of my head all

01:02:48.420 --> 01:02:50.079
the time. Like, I don't think it's ever gonna

01:02:50.079 --> 01:02:53.940
really leave because of my anxiety. But there's

01:02:53.940 --> 01:02:55.900
always that little voice inside my head that's,

01:02:55.940 --> 01:02:57.340
you're gonna say something wrong. Somebody's

01:02:57.340 --> 01:02:59.159
taking it out of context and you're gonna go...

01:02:59.159 --> 01:03:01.900
And it's just that nagging voice of, don't say

01:03:01.900 --> 01:03:04.219
something wrong. Don't say something not woke.

01:03:04.320 --> 01:03:07.179
And I'm like... Don't be controversial. Don't

01:03:07.179 --> 01:03:10.280
be controversial. And... So I like, I try to

01:03:10.280 --> 01:03:13.260
feel like, but then I feel like I won't ever

01:03:13.260 --> 01:03:16.880
speak my mind or say anything if I'm constantly

01:03:16.880 --> 01:03:20.760
in my own head and thinking that I'm not allowed

01:03:20.760 --> 01:03:23.519
to say anything. If people want to take it any

01:03:23.519 --> 01:03:26.539
way they want to take it, okay. I, at the end

01:03:26.539 --> 01:03:29.559
of the day, know who I am. I know my heart. I

01:03:29.559 --> 01:03:32.480
know what's in my soul. And I know how I intend

01:03:32.480 --> 01:03:35.480
things and how I put myself out there every day.

01:03:36.840 --> 01:03:39.019
That's a very important message that I would

01:03:39.019 --> 01:03:42.320
have for everybody listening is that at the end

01:03:42.320 --> 01:03:44.280
of the day, you're alone with yourself. Like

01:03:44.280 --> 01:03:45.800
you have people around you who love you, but

01:03:45.800 --> 01:03:47.760
you're the only one that lives within yourself

01:03:47.760 --> 01:03:50.440
that knows yourself and knows who you are. If

01:03:50.440 --> 01:03:53.860
you need work, because we all do and no one's

01:03:53.860 --> 01:03:57.119
ever going to be perfect or needing not to learn

01:03:57.119 --> 01:03:59.000
new lessons. No one's ever going to be too old

01:03:59.000 --> 01:04:03.360
to learn. It's all about perspective and about

01:04:03.360 --> 01:04:06.989
thinking. challenging yourself? Do I really need

01:04:06.989 --> 01:04:10.289
to say this? Is this imperative that I make this

01:04:10.289 --> 01:04:14.329
argument? Do I really need to ruin my relationship

01:04:14.329 --> 01:04:17.050
over this? Do I need to start a fight over this?

01:04:17.429 --> 01:04:20.489
Is it worth the energy? Because most of the time

01:04:20.489 --> 01:04:26.070
it's not. Yeah. So why put so much stress on

01:04:26.070 --> 01:04:28.550
yourself and the other person where you could

01:04:28.550 --> 01:04:30.610
just have a conversation even if you don't agree?

01:04:31.119 --> 01:04:33.579
It's more enlightening anyway if you don't agree

01:04:33.579 --> 01:04:35.920
with somebody, because then you learn to bounce

01:04:35.920 --> 01:04:41.260
ideas off of each other. Yeah. So I think for

01:04:41.260 --> 01:04:45.820
me, my biggest anxiety for talking, especially

01:04:45.820 --> 01:04:49.639
for long periods, is always that I'm afraid of

01:04:49.639 --> 01:04:51.619
what other people are going to think of me. I'm

01:04:51.619 --> 01:04:56.900
afraid of how people are going to paint me or

01:04:56.900 --> 01:04:59.019
narratives that people are going to use about

01:04:59.019 --> 01:05:04.579
me. I still have those fears and it's still very

01:05:04.579 --> 01:05:08.059
much a thing that I think about but it's gotten

01:05:08.059 --> 01:05:11.380
better in the past year because it's definitely

01:05:11.380 --> 01:05:14.760
come with me saying I can't control what other

01:05:14.760 --> 01:05:20.940
people do say or think and I know that at the

01:05:20.940 --> 01:05:24.320
end of the day I have a very strong support system

01:05:24.320 --> 01:05:28.619
and I myself and you guys listening lean on those

01:05:28.619 --> 01:05:32.650
people that really do know you. and will stand

01:05:32.650 --> 01:05:36.969
by you. And the people who, if you are doing

01:05:36.969 --> 01:05:39.409
something that's problematic, will call you out

01:05:39.409 --> 01:05:41.610
on it. Real friends will tell you like, hey,

01:05:41.710 --> 01:05:44.730
that's a little, I don't like that. We should

01:05:44.730 --> 01:05:47.110
work on that. And it doesn't have to be, I don't

01:05:47.110 --> 01:05:49.349
like that. Fuck you. I hate you forever. Goodbye.

01:05:50.650 --> 01:05:54.369
It can be, hey, I've noticed this. Maybe this

01:05:54.369 --> 01:05:57.289
is something that we can explore if you feel

01:05:57.289 --> 01:05:58.829
like, if you agree that this is something that

01:05:58.829 --> 01:06:01.969
you should work on. And having that mutual conversation

01:06:01.969 --> 01:06:04.010
of it not always being just them telling you

01:06:04.010 --> 01:06:06.090
like, hey, change your shit. You can tell them

01:06:06.090 --> 01:06:08.769
that too, and they're receptive to that. Having

01:06:08.769 --> 01:06:12.070
those open dialogues are very important. And

01:06:12.070 --> 01:06:15.489
looping it back around to representation in media,

01:06:15.630 --> 01:06:18.090
I think it starts with representing ourselves

01:06:18.090 --> 01:06:22.849
and our own relationships, and our own interpersonal

01:06:22.849 --> 01:06:25.869
relationships. Because what we do in our lives

01:06:25.869 --> 01:06:28.289
is what we project and put out into the world.

01:06:30.070 --> 01:06:34.230
So if you really think about it, that's a lot

01:06:34.230 --> 01:06:36.690
of the reason you might get upset over things

01:06:36.690 --> 01:06:39.630
is because there's something that is unhealed

01:06:39.630 --> 01:06:43.710
or unresolved within yourself that you could

01:06:43.710 --> 01:06:47.510
take another look at and discuss or bounce ideas

01:06:47.510 --> 01:06:52.530
off of each other, go to therapy. And at the

01:06:52.530 --> 01:06:56.690
end of the day, it's just an ongoing conversation

01:06:56.690 --> 01:07:00.610
that we need to have as people. that doesn't

01:07:00.610 --> 01:07:03.869
always need to turn into something hateful or

01:07:03.869 --> 01:07:08.250
mean or negative or spun in a different narrative.

01:07:08.889 --> 01:07:11.469
We just need to come to terms that we're all

01:07:11.469 --> 01:07:15.269
going to be flawed forever. And the only thing

01:07:15.269 --> 01:07:17.969
we can do is just try to be better every day,

01:07:18.050 --> 01:07:20.170
a little bit better today than you were yesterday.

01:07:21.389 --> 01:07:27.070
That's all you can do. So if you don't like representation

01:07:27.070 --> 01:07:29.780
in the media and like how it's going, Leave constructive

01:07:29.780 --> 01:07:33.619
feedback. Don't tear things down, but leave constructive

01:07:33.619 --> 01:07:35.780
feedback. Hey, have you thought of this? Hey,

01:07:35.900 --> 01:07:38.840
maybe look at it from this perspective. Offering

01:07:38.840 --> 01:07:43.199
it. Figure out why as well. Why does this not

01:07:43.199 --> 01:07:46.260
resonate with you? It's not always just going

01:07:46.260 --> 01:07:47.900
to be like, I just don't like it. It's like,

01:07:48.059 --> 01:07:51.420
but why? The writing, is it the pacing? Is it

01:07:51.420 --> 01:07:54.199
because they rely on stereotypes? Is it because

01:07:54.199 --> 01:07:57.730
this is? negative in some way, or is it just

01:07:57.730 --> 01:08:00.869
not the way that you see these types of people?

01:08:01.530 --> 01:08:04.449
Sometimes it could be just your lens that could

01:08:04.449 --> 01:08:06.230
be skewed. It's always important to figure out

01:08:06.230 --> 01:08:08.710
the why. Sorry to interrupt, but. No, it's fine.

01:08:08.849 --> 01:08:11.489
That's very important as a witchy person myself.

01:08:11.690 --> 01:08:13.670
One of the biggest things I had a runes reading

01:08:13.670 --> 01:08:17.470
the other day, and it was very profound when

01:08:17.470 --> 01:08:21.380
he told me was, always think about the why. And

01:08:21.380 --> 01:08:23.340
I think I might have mentioned this in a past

01:08:23.340 --> 01:08:25.460
podcast, but my memory is absolutely terrible.

01:08:25.920 --> 01:08:29.420
So you might hear me repeat things. Sorry. But

01:08:29.420 --> 01:08:32.260
long story short, he told me a lot of things

01:08:32.260 --> 01:08:34.359
that we can really think about spiritually is,

01:08:34.560 --> 01:08:37.359
say, for example, someone's bullying you. It's

01:08:37.359 --> 01:08:39.899
not a good thing. There's no excuse for the behavior.

01:08:40.539 --> 01:08:43.239
Why are they doing it? Maybe we can dissect this

01:08:43.239 --> 01:08:45.520
a little bit. Why are they bullying you? Oh,

01:08:45.640 --> 01:08:48.260
because you wore, it could be something as simple

01:08:48.260 --> 01:08:52.979
as you said that you didn't like cats and they

01:08:52.979 --> 01:08:55.760
got upset with you because they were never allowed

01:08:55.760 --> 01:08:57.939
to have a cat growing up. So now they resent

01:08:57.939 --> 01:09:01.159
people who have cats or have had cats and don't

01:09:01.159 --> 01:09:03.699
like them or don't want to get them because it's

01:09:03.699 --> 01:09:05.800
their narrative that they never got to have one

01:09:05.800 --> 01:09:09.000
and they really want one. So how come you don't?

01:09:09.020 --> 01:09:11.159
Like, how come you don't agree with me? There's

01:09:11.159 --> 01:09:15.470
always a why that comes internally that can be

01:09:15.470 --> 01:09:19.069
connected back. So it's like a chain reaction.

01:09:19.930 --> 01:09:23.470
And it takes a lot of time to think about things

01:09:23.470 --> 01:09:28.430
like this, but maybe, I think, what did he say?

01:09:28.609 --> 01:09:31.829
I think he had said he used to never wear short

01:09:31.829 --> 01:09:34.810
sleeves because people said that he didn't look

01:09:34.810 --> 01:09:37.869
good in them. So then he started wearing sweaters.

01:09:38.039 --> 01:09:40.140
But those didn't make him comfortable. And then

01:09:40.140 --> 01:09:41.819
people started making fun of him because he wore

01:09:41.819 --> 01:09:44.000
sweaters and he wasn't showing off like his arms.

01:09:44.659 --> 01:09:48.380
So then he was thinking maybe, why is this person

01:09:48.380 --> 01:09:51.500
telling me this? Maybe they got bullied because

01:09:51.500 --> 01:09:53.880
of what they wore. So now they have a trauma

01:09:53.880 --> 01:09:57.159
and they're projecting that onto him. Why did

01:09:57.159 --> 01:09:59.140
they have a trauma? Somebody else from their

01:09:59.140 --> 01:10:01.520
family may have had a trauma and projected it

01:10:01.520 --> 01:10:06.079
onto them. It can go back so far, even if you

01:10:06.079 --> 01:10:08.880
don't know. you can always kind of assume that

01:10:08.880 --> 01:10:15.720
it comes from somewhere. And being able to take

01:10:15.720 --> 01:10:19.039
what somebody says with a grain of salt and just

01:10:19.039 --> 01:10:20.600
being like, okay, that's fine. I'm going to do

01:10:20.600 --> 01:10:22.960
what I'm going to do. As long as I'm not hurting

01:10:22.960 --> 01:10:24.720
anybody, I'm going to do what I'm going to do.

01:10:25.680 --> 01:10:28.239
They're allowed to say whatever they want. And

01:10:28.239 --> 01:10:30.199
if they can, if they want to be negative, okay,

01:10:30.539 --> 01:10:32.460
that doesn't need to affect you or ruin your

01:10:32.460 --> 01:10:37.509
day or ruin what you think about yourself. So

01:10:37.509 --> 01:10:41.689
don't let people harm your self -image because

01:10:41.689 --> 01:10:44.550
they have an unhealed version of themselves that

01:10:44.550 --> 01:10:48.590
they're unwilling to work on. It all comes down

01:10:48.590 --> 01:10:51.789
to understanding that people do that because

01:10:51.789 --> 01:10:53.609
they haven't worked on certain things within

01:10:53.609 --> 01:10:56.810
themselves. You can only do what you can do and

01:10:56.810 --> 01:11:02.409
what you can control is you. Give them grace.

01:11:02.430 --> 01:11:06.529
You don't have to take it as fact. People have

01:11:06.529 --> 01:11:09.149
commented on my singing like, ah, this is ass.

01:11:09.189 --> 01:11:10.750
And I'm like, all right, cool. Thanks for your

01:11:10.750 --> 01:11:14.630
opinion. I know my singing is not ass. And I

01:11:14.630 --> 01:11:17.770
could go into a bunch of whys about why it's

01:11:17.770 --> 01:11:20.010
not ass. But that's the thing. I don't need to

01:11:20.010 --> 01:11:24.090
explain myself. No, it totally made sense. Sorry.

01:11:24.850 --> 01:11:30.710
I'm distracted. OK, just the silence. Sorry.

01:11:32.189 --> 01:11:36.210
Wow. Leaving me alone on my soapbox alone. It's

01:11:36.210 --> 01:11:40.489
windy up here. Listen, I saw a falling leaf and

01:11:40.489 --> 01:11:42.449
it was very interesting how we did a little slip

01:11:42.449 --> 01:11:45.510
at the end. I'm sorry. Literally, Gabe was like

01:11:45.510 --> 01:11:50.369
squirrel. It was a very interesting leaf. You

01:11:50.369 --> 01:11:54.869
should have seen it. What are your closing thoughts,

01:11:55.090 --> 01:12:01.560
Gabe? Okay. Closing thoughts, I guess just. Be

01:12:01.560 --> 01:12:06.720
aware that your representation in no matter form

01:12:06.720 --> 01:12:11.420
what it takes good or bad is representation and

01:12:11.420 --> 01:12:14.300
sometimes we can't be picky on that. But at the

01:12:14.300 --> 01:12:17.140
same time, because it's a nuanced situation,

01:12:17.359 --> 01:12:21.460
right? You're allowed to be critical of media.

01:12:22.380 --> 01:12:25.260
You're allowed to voice your opinions about it.

01:12:25.579 --> 01:12:28.180
You can decide whether or not it's technically

01:12:28.180 --> 01:12:31.130
good representation or bad representation. for

01:12:31.130 --> 01:12:34.590
you but for you thank you for that because yeah

01:12:34.590 --> 01:12:37.670
it is definitely whether or not it is for you

01:12:37.670 --> 01:12:39.590
yeah but that still does not negate the fact

01:12:39.590 --> 01:12:42.770
that it exists and it's always grateful that

01:12:42.770 --> 01:12:47.449
it exists even if it's the smallest tiniest idiot

01:12:47.449 --> 01:12:50.250
biggest character that is only there for 0 .2

01:12:50.250 --> 01:12:53.369
seconds we can be like hey look another one we

01:12:53.369 --> 01:12:57.229
can add it to our collection it's great but another

01:12:57.399 --> 01:13:00.140
Closing thought is just be aware as a creator,

01:13:00.340 --> 01:13:03.939
if you are a creator who is either, if you're

01:13:03.939 --> 01:13:06.819
a part of the queer community or not, just be

01:13:06.819 --> 01:13:10.800
aware of stereotypes, be aware of the voices

01:13:10.800 --> 01:13:14.500
of queer people that you know or queer people

01:13:14.500 --> 01:13:18.180
online and who talk about their experiences being

01:13:18.180 --> 01:13:24.039
queer. And don't be afraid to... Stay away from

01:13:24.039 --> 01:13:26.600
those stereotypes or circumvent those stereotypes

01:13:26.600 --> 01:13:31.260
or even use those stereotypes, but make sure

01:13:31.260 --> 01:13:33.699
you have fleshed out characters to go with it.

01:13:33.979 --> 01:13:36.939
Just treat them as characters first, not just

01:13:36.939 --> 01:13:42.939
a little checkbox or representation. It's not

01:13:42.939 --> 01:13:47.720
super helpful to have a queer character who is

01:13:47.720 --> 01:13:52.789
just a stereotype. That's bad character. What

01:13:52.789 --> 01:13:55.250
is the word? It's just a bad character. It's

01:13:55.250 --> 01:13:57.930
a bad character. Yeah. Bad character development.

01:13:58.750 --> 01:14:01.029
Yeah. Bad character development. Bad character

01:14:01.029 --> 01:14:04.029
overall. And if you want to make a good story,

01:14:04.170 --> 01:14:09.310
you need good characters. Can't really have that.

01:14:09.569 --> 01:14:12.069
I'm flubbing. I'm flubbing. Oh my God. Are you

01:14:12.069 --> 01:14:15.750
okay? Somebody get him some water. He needs some

01:14:15.750 --> 01:14:18.949
milk. Take the box. Take the box. Take the box.

01:14:19.369 --> 01:14:24.819
Take the box. I think we're both going on brain

01:14:24.819 --> 01:14:28.140
-dead, so we'll go ahead and end the podcast

01:14:28.140 --> 01:14:31.300
there. So thank you guys for watching. If you

01:14:31.300 --> 01:14:34.640
can, please support me on Patreon at Song of

01:14:34.640 --> 01:14:39.399
Rain. And like I dropped a hint, there will be

01:14:39.399 --> 01:14:42.199
a story podcast coming out, hopefully at the

01:14:42.199 --> 01:14:44.460
end of the year, if not earlier. But we'll see

01:14:44.460 --> 01:14:47.039
how long it takes to get the episodes finished.

01:14:47.460 --> 01:14:50.859
So be on the lookout for that and... We will

01:14:50.859 --> 01:14:54.579
talk to you again soon, so drink water, be kind

01:14:54.579 --> 01:14:58.520
to yourself and others, and take care. All right,

01:14:58.819 --> 01:15:00.460
bye. Bye.