Hey there everybody, welcome to the Mark Mo Show
Season 6 Episode 10, our final episode of Season
6, titled 250. Do I have to, I'm not even gonna
explain it. Anyway, you can find us on all podcast
platforms and YouTube. I would like to introduce
you to my co -host, producer, super awesome dude
and my son, lucky me, Aidan Maloney. How are
you, dude? Hola, I'm chilling, chillaxing, got
an okay night's sleep. Good. I've had two energy
drinks today. I'm drinking a little hydration
drink. I'm getting ready. I've never been more
prepared in my life. That's amazing and that's
quite the statement. Yeah, that's that's quite
the future urination. I'm gonna be having that's
gonna like it's gonna be high volume You know
you see those those videos of like water mains
bursting. Yes. It's building up already Yellowstone
geysers and that Leslie Nielsen naked gun where
he's at the urinal for like He just starts up
again Yeah, there's something different about
caffeine especially like coffee does it to me
a little bit, but like energy drinks that caffeine
hits different it's like i know it's technically
a diuretic i think i've heard yeah but man that's
that's crazy like how how quickly that liquid
is just like nah let me back out dude uh -huh
oh yeah i'm done in here like it gets in it's
like uh hey we extracted all that caffeine stuff
we went out and get rid of the useless shit where's
the exit door yeah i hear you man well uh Well,
folks, we've six seasons. We're pretty, I think,
pretty happy with how we've evolved and things
that we've been doing. I hope you guys enjoy
it, for sure. And we'll talk a little bit about
Aiden and his gaming channel. It's been doing
that for quite a while. It is on the old YouTube.
It is called Aiden Spelled the Right Way. Lots
of PC gaming content, GeoGuessr, PolyBridge,
Observation Duty, and lots of horror games. So,
Aiden, tell everybody what you can expect because,
you know... for many of you and it seems like
this was something we've been trying to move
towards and we finally have and We're we seem
to be picking up steam, which is great and that
is through through TikTok and Instagram Reels,
and we're just dropping these little 15 to 30
second gems on you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And yeah,
so I want you to let everybody know what's up.
It's fantastic. I've still got this massive backlog
of indie horror games that I'm playing through.
I've released an episode where the game was called
Small Mouse Big House. Where I play as this little
mouse mama trying to steal cheese from the human
beings. Way more terrifying than I thought it
would be. And the jump scares in that game were
crazy. Well, yeah, I watched. They're one of
the reels that's that's out there. And by the
way, let everybody know, like TikTok and Insta,
like where how they can find us, like what our
handle is. Yeah, our handle is A and M, A ampersand
M and co. So that's how you can find us. Usually
it's like. at a .m .content or a .m .co .content
because, hey, the bots stole all the good names.
Yeah, by now. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, you can find
us on there, A &M and Co. And yeah, we've been
blacklisted or shadowbanned on TikTok. And I
have no clue why. I reached out to their helpline
feedback thing, never heard back, because we
had a good run where every TikTok and Reel we
uploaded was going to get either a couple dozen
or a couple hundred views. Some of them even
got quadruple digits, which was cool. Yeah, that's
awesome. And then all of a sudden on TikTok,
it's like zero views, one view, two views, zero
views. It's like what? I don't understand because
on Reels those same clips that get zero get like
180. I'm like, I think we're shadow banned on
TikTok and I don't know why. Hi, yeah. Regardless
of the back -end bullshittery, it is fun. Lots
of clips from A &M, lots of clips from, Aiden
spelled the right way. It's a jam. It's a jamboree.
It is indeed. It is indeed a Jamboree, and everybody
should definitely check that out, as well as
a segue into our gaming site that we do, kind
of bringing all his fun gaming prowess and our
goofiness and improv here on this show, and doing
some gaming of our own. That is A &M Gaming,
and you can find that on YouTube as well. And,
you know, we do a lot of similar games. GeoGuessr
and Observation Duty. We did one last week. I
can't remember the name. Spectator. Spectator.
So it's like a similar version of Observation
Duty. I think it's a smidge easier. There's less
complexities. But it's just as fun, if not funner.
Funner? I would agree. Fun. Funnest. Funny. Funner.
Funnest. It goes fun, more fun, funnest. Yeah.
That's confusing. There's no Funner. Funner?
Funner? I hardly know her. Why did I say that?
I don't know. It's episode 10. We're taking next
week off. You've hit a wall. And to be fair.
With the English language. Well, no. I've hit
a wall. Period. End of sentence. Because I have...
Let's do the quick math. Thursday, up at 7 in
the morning. And then I stayed up till... Four
in the morning, Friday. So that's almost, what's
it say, 21 hours? 20 or 21. Quick math, quick
math. Straight, four hours of sleep. Got up at
seventh, eh, it's close to eight. I was a little
bit late to work. Oh no, I wonder why. Oopsie.
It's close to eight o 'clock, but. Then I did
eight, two, three in the morning again, because
they're closing my favorite bar because it got
bought by some douche and whatever, the American
dream, right? So that was another 22 hours straight.
So doing the math, we're at like what, 43 hours
awake with four hours of sleep. Give or take.
Give or take. And then I got what, five, not
even five, four and a half. before coming to
the studio here today so we're on like 40 we're
on like 41 and 8 right now 41 and 8 it's a pretty
good record in baseball that'd be a great record
baseball yeah so we're at 41 on 8 off and uh
you know this day is just beginning so um we're
only beginning to cook yeah so i may hit the
wall but as we always say when we're super tired
or stressed or hung over, we tend to do our best.
Any type of compromise state, yeah. Because we
don't overthink anything because we're just real.
Yeah, we're just put the chef's hat on. Let me
cook Exactly. So we're doing a lot of cooking
here today. That's for sure But then you're eight
like subscribe share all that kind of good stuff
We appreciate each and every one of you six seasons
in Catching the show whether you're just a casual
listener you check out every episode. We appreciate
each and every one of you and Yeah, so 250 it's
a name of this episode, final episode of season
six. I shouldn't have to explain it. Yeah. I
don't. Everyone knows the song. For future spawns,
poor spacious guys in rampant space aflame. 250.
The purple mountain's gathering, and all the
spooning planes. Wait, wait, wait. America! No,
no, no. You know how the song goes. No, unfortunately
I do. Purple Mountains Majesty. All right, first
off. Is that what I said? I thought that's the
lyrics. Purple Mountains Majesty. Yeah. No, you
know, I fully believe whoever wrote that song.
It's high as fuck. Purple Mountain where? Was
that the actual lyric? That is the lyric. Oh.
Purple Mountains Majesty. Huh. That's quite unique.
Now. I have been through Colorado, Wyoming, Montana,
Idaho. Wherever the mountains are. We've been.
Washington. We've been where the mountains are.
And they are beautiful, no question. Gorgeous,
even. Never seen purple. No. Maybe it's like
the artistic rendition of what a sunset on a
mountain would look like. I mean, maybe you give
them the creative license to be a little crazy,
get a little goofy with it. Right. You know?
Purple Mountain Majesty. I think I sang the song
wrong. Or did I sing it right? I think you were
pr— I think you were on point. Okay. I think
you were definitely on point. Just like, hey,
amaz— Purple, Purple Mountains Majesty. Purple
Mountains is the name of the strain. That's the
name of the strain. Right, they're like, oh,
isn't that a beautiful lyric? I'm like, no, dude,
he's telling me what he's smoking. We're out
of OG Skywalker. Don't worry, I got Purple Mountain
Majesty, bro. Oh, dude. Oh, dude, lit. That's
so funny. Anyway, happy birthday, Marika. gonna
turn 250 here on July 4th. And you don't look
a day over 234, let me tell you. You know, despite
the pock marks and, you know, maybe a couple
gray hairs, you know, you're looking okay -ish.
That is for sure. You know, I'm just as far as,
you know, birthing, birthdays, all that stuff.
You know, none of us remember our first day of
life. If you do, you're a freak. I was like,
oh man, I remember coming out. I was real comfy
in there, man. All of a sudden, I came out. I'm
like, whoa, bright lights. You know, turn that
shit down. What the hell? Pull me back. There's
capitalism out here. Yeah, exactly. So, be it
that we don't, you know, heck, most of us can't
remember most of our childhoods, but America,
we remember your birth and we know it all even
if we weren't there because everybody wrote about
it and the first weeks and months of the baby
united states as an independent nation were times
of uncertainty experimentation and nation -building
sound familiar anyway Although independence had
been declared, there's no strong national government.
The states began to write their own constitutions
while the Continental Congress governed the war
effort. In November of 1777, Congress approved
the Articles of Confederation. Remember those?
Didn't think so. We're Americans. Nobody knows
their history. What the hell are you guys learning
in those classics? I've seen the Jimmy Kimmel
bit with history and geography. We're dumb peoples.
Although they were not fully ratified until 1781.
Now, during these early months, American leaders
worked to gain some international recognition,
right? Because we're just this rag -tag bunch.
And the most important goal was securing aid
from France. Although France did not formally
ally with the U .S. until 1778, it secretly provided
money, weapons, and supplies beginning in 1776.
Now, during this time, of uncertainty and trying
to get recognition globally and all this stuff.
Life for ordinary Americans, interestingly enough,
all the technologies changed and all the advanced
everything, it's kind of similar in many ways.
So you had farmers raising crops, you had merchants
struggling because it was war time, inflation
on goods, families, ad members fighting in the
military. often times on the opposite side and
there were enslaved peoples women and in many
of the natives saw little immediate improvement
to their rights or their status through the revolution
and would have lasting effects on the school
for a very long time perhaps even still to this
day perhaps even still to this day you are correct
the estrous months were marked by military setbacks
financial hardship political uncertainty Sound
familiar? Hmm, interesting. Indeed. Despite the
challenges, victories at Trenton and Princeton
gave the new nation renewed confidence and helped
keep the revolution alive long enough to secure
crucial foreign support and eventually independence.
250 years. Well, not all of it's been good. It's
been marred by... workers' rights revolts, abuse
of Native Americans, racism, sexism, class warfare,
collapse of the housing market, corporate theocracy.
But it hasn't been all bad either. We abolished
slavery, we guaranteed a woman's right to vote,
passed the Civil Rights Act of 1964, conquered
fascism on D -Day, Roe v. Wade guaranteed, remember
that? Roe v. Wade? Anybody? Back in the day.
Back in the day. Pippridge Farm remembers. Roe
v. Wade guaranteed a woman's right to choose.
We defeated communism, passed gay rights, marriage
legislation. We had President Barack Obama and
Michael fucking Jordan. You damn right. You damn
right. And most of those things happened from
group efforts and activism and bloodshed of the
working class, all overcoming these issues as
a population. Right. that is exactly correct
and you know in in america i mean globally too
but in america we do have a tendency for history
to repeat itself because we don't learn the first
time clearly uh in the beginning there was that
financial hardship and political uncertainty
and military setbacks and here we are 250 years
later still facing many of the same challenges
however i will utter the same saying i i deliver
when talking about like mental health And it's
the same saying I say for that, as I'll say now,
we're still here. Yeah. So that is significant.
Maybe just by the will of your average person,
we're still here. We still have a chance to be
better. We have the ability to make every American's
lives a little bit better. We can be better stewards
of this amazing planet. We've been given. Brock
talked about hope and I have hope. We can turn
things around and finally be great. Right. I
think that's fair. There's no reason we can't
be. I think a lot of times it takes what's happened
the last 10, 15 years -ish or more to wake up
and say, okay, you know, we're off course. And
not just by a little. We're off course by a lot.
By a long way. By a long way. where we're going
down a real bad path. And we have this ability,
this opportunity to course correct. And once
again, try not to be very political on those
sorts of things. But when you look at Bernie
and AOC, and now Mom Donnie in New York, that's
the future. that we need to strive for, regardless
of the side that you are on. If you value America
and you're gonna put a big old flag on your pickup
truck and your proud union and all this other
crap, you have to realize this is the way we've
got to go. Will it be perfect? Will it be smooth?
No, absolutely not. Right. But it's the way we
have to go. And we chatted about that too a couple
seasons ago of was this inevitable? You know,
with how broken this system is proven to be,
which a lot of us kind of knew before it all
started falling apart in front of our eyes quite
publicly, was this inevitable to hit this current
all -time low in order to bounce back? Like,
does it really truly take a rude awakening for
the propaganda machine to start falling apart?
And people start waking up and realizing, like,
wow, I... I didn't I didn't know it was this
bad. Right. Those pedophiles in government really
don't care about me. Like yeah buddy, correct.
Finally. Yeah and see that the interesting thing
is is because they're brainwashed and they are,
they sit there and they're being told oh these
people are to blame for it. The immigrants are
to blame for it, you know. sexuality is to blame
for it. Right. So on and so on and so on. Telling
people, hey, our country sucks and this is why.
Well, number one, they're just telling you who's
to blame and doing nothing to quote unquote fix
it. Right. But then these people are like, oh,
it's their fault, it's their fault, it's their
fault. And they all tend to be part of this party.
So, yeah, it's their fault. No, it's not. Right.
And when you have every major news outlet owned
by right -wing billionaires. Yeah, it's a problem.
And you have, it's the old saying, right? Like
a house divided cannot stand. Yep. All those
news outlets are trying to do is divide you.
Right. So you are constantly fighting a culture
war rather than gaining class consciousness and
fighting the much -needed class war. That is
how many, I don't know, maybe 250 years overdue?
It is incredibly overdue. And... Capitalism,
or at least the original ideas of just having
a market where you can go and be successful,
on the face of it, not a problem. But there are
countries that make that work without doing it
the way that we're doing it, which is creating
this massive divide where the wealthiest 1 %
are so much wealthier than the rest of the 99.
And the 50 % of that 99 are poor. Well and truly
poor. That's a problem. That's a huge problem,
and it should not be that way. And the tenets
of democratic socialism, which is not socialism,
once again, if TVs are telling you one thing,
or religious people, by the way, I know I'm wrong
on this, and I'll probably get people to get
all cranky. I think, you know, we abolished slavery,
which is great, and then we got rid of alcohol,
but then we woke up and said, eh, okay, maybe
not. We'll let people have beer. Yeah. Which
was great. Thank you for doing that, by the way,
old American people. But of things that should
be abolished should be institutional religion.
Look, you want to sit in your home or get with
a small group of people, praise Jeebiz or Allah
or whatever, have at it. I'm not saying you can't
do that. But this institutional religion where
they're trying to get into your politics and
drive their narrative. I'm not down with that,
and that's also part of the problem. Right, and
you have all this Christian nationalism in this
country. It's been on the rise for the last decade,
maybe two decades. Garbage. And it begs the question
why these institutions, these mega churches,
these massive packs and super packs, get representation
without taxation, and yet every two weeks out
of my paycheck, I get taxation. without representation.
Yep. It's very interesting how that pans out.
Yeah, we dumped a bunch of tea in a harbor. Right.
Over that. What harbor are we going to this time?
Yeah. What are we throwing in there? Holy water?
Yeah, right. I don't know. I don't know what
we throw in there, but maybe some preachers?
I don't know. Swim. Swim. Oh, he doesn't know
how to swim. Oh, no. Oh, no. Throw him up. Nah,
never mind. Oh, the choir boys didn't teach you
how to swim? Nah, we don't win. Dude, you set
me up and I'm not taking the bait. Not gonna
do it. How would the Catholics ever recover from
that joke? Oh, no. Nope. Nope. Not gonna do it.
Not gonna do it. Anyway, I kind of do real bad.
You did. You did because I just like I immediately
had three choir boy. Catholic Church jokes just
pop in my head and I'm just gonna let those go
cuz that's a different show that's a That's a
different show altogether. But I think the the
main point here is we veered off course and And
we have that ability to correct and I hope we
do I think some leaders on the left are a joke
We'll throw out Chuck Schumer. Hurry! With his
red nose. Clown. Clown that guy. He's just the
worst. Fucking clown. Schumer's terrible. Cory
Booker's terrible. That dude, Fetterman or whatever
his name is from Pennsylvania. Terrible. He's
the worst. And there's, I know there's others
and I'm not gonna sit here and do like a whole
thing of it because like we said we try to not
be too political but you know if the left is
going to try to help the country course correct
and correct some some big f -ups they need to
be united and they're not right and they're taking
what's happening on the left which is called
a movement ladies and gentlemen um i guarantee
you fdr would be on this jfk would be on this
they would be all over it they would be all for
bobby kennedy would be leading the charge and
for the moderate apac cucks to sit there and
throw shade at the left for doing what they're
doing is the dumbest shit I've ever heard when
this midterm is the most important election maybe
in the history of the United States. And you're
gonna do that? Are you stupid? The paychecks
are too good. Paychecks are too good. They don't
care. They don't care. They don't give a shit.
It's all about the money and enriching those
that have it so they have more. Right. And we
need to be done with that shit. Yeah, no more
late -stage capitalism status quo bullshittery.
Look, there is a reason that Putin is hiding
in his little basement now because his country
is collapsing and Ukraine is whooping their ass
at every turn because that type of leadership,
that type of government doesn't work and it doesn't
last because the will of the people is too goddamn
strong. The question is, do Americans have that?
Think we do they have the will and ability to
do it. I think we always have I think we do I
think the issue is Too much misinformation too
much division. Yeah, and that swings us all the
way back to what we said Not ten minutes ago
about who owns media who owns the the the channels
through which we communicate right -wing billionaires
Right, correct. I in class consciousness won't
exist if they have anything to say about it.
Because then that threatens their power. What
do they want? Money and power. That's it. That's
it exactly. So we're turning 250. Are we going
to see 275? I don't know. I don't know. I'm not
sure. I'm not sure. I hope so. We have this chance
to do something great in the next year or two.
We really, really do. Now, it's a shame. that
mom donnie cannot be a president because he was
not born here and that is the rule um but i love
what he's doing in new york he's already guaranteed
like he's already delivered on half of his promises
already hasn't even been a year right uh and
and i i love that um we need more leadership
like that a lot of his candidates in new york
have won yes this is true they they have beaten
all the corporate apac dem cucks and i love that
Because that that's the old way a lot of these
Democrats the Schumers etc in 1980 they'd be
Republicans or what they used to call Reagan
Democrats, that's what they'd be and There is
no more room in that party for them now anymore.
That's you know, even ha Bill Maher that fucking
guy gets on a show and and is so anti democratic
socialist, that he literally had the vice president
on his show and said that if this movement continued,
he would vote Republican. What an asshole. I
knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. No,
because he's one of the rich pricks, too. He's
one of the rich pricks, too, and he's easy to
use people on the left to line his pockets for
years. And who owns the network he speaks on?
Yeah. Enough said. Enough said. Enough said.
So take it for what it's worth. And ultimately,
even though we did have a little bit of political
talk here. How can you talk about a country without
without doing that? You have to be a little bit
right. But point point being, it's not it's ultimately
not about left and right. It's about what's doing
what's right. R I G H T. Right. It is about what
is doing right, what is correct. There's that
one Jeff Daniels thing, I forget what show it
was, where he was on a panel and he had to say
why America was the greatest country in the world
or whatever. The college girl asked him the question.
And he just went on this epic rant of why America
is not the greatest country in the world. And
it's true. People have got to put the Kool -Aid
down and look in the mirror and realize we're
not. Right, and that's the difference between
... patriotism and nationalism. Yes. Where patriotism,
you can look at your country and be like, I want
this to be better. I'll point out its flaws.
I'll gladly say it's not the best country in
the world. Where nationalism is the worship of
a country, ignoring every wrongdoing. Yes. That's
the difference. You can call yourself a patriot,
but if you ignore... All the wrongdoings and
you don't think there's anything wrong Oh, we're
the greatest country in the earth and you just
close your eyes and ears to anything that is
actually real happening in this country Yeah,
you're not a patriot. You're a nationalist. Mm
-hmm, and you're fucking wrong. Yeah, and there
are Democracies around the world better than
this one and you know where they got their constitutions
You know where they got their rules and their
laws and everything else from us back in the
day They're like, yeah, that's great. We need
to do that And now here we are, we're like, oh
my God, those guys, socialists. It's like, no,
everything they got, they got from us. Those
ideas and their constitution was like, yeah,
we really like what the Americans are doing there.
Let's do that. They're kind of cooking with that
idea. Let's do that. And it drives me crazy.
Yes, we're a public, but we're a democratic republic.
And the whole idea behind how we were gonna do
this thing. was brilliant, okay? Study your founding
fathers. By the way, they weren't religious.
They honestly didn't give a shit about religion.
None of them did. They knew people did. They
knew there had to be some guarantees and rights
for them. But that was it. That was it. Otherwise,
they didn't give a shit. But they knew how they
wanted to build. nation all these pompous little
farmers were just like yep this is how we're
doing it and Yep, the Brits now. We're not gonna
do it that way We're gonna do it this way because
they have a king and how they do things sucks
Yeah And we went and did our own thing and was
the model for it around the world For people
that aspired to have a republic democratic republic
anything like that We were the model and now
we're so far from our original model It's crazy.
Right. And by the way, I just want to say this,
because there's amendment people out there. And
you're these amazing Americans. Oh, it's all
about the amendments. Well, we know which ones
you care about. And you kind of do amendments
with the same way you do your Bible. You pick
and choose. It's like a buffet and you put the
things on your plate that are important to you
and fuck off on the rest. Right. That seems to
be the way you guys operate. But it's not it's
not an all you can. It's an all you must eat.
All of it. is in there okay my right to speak
yep you got a right to speak you also there are
also consequences to that right okay that's yep
you can go in tell your boss hey asshole you're
fat and you're stupid and i don't like your wife
you have every right to do that every right in
the world to open your mouth and say that guaranteed
by the constitution he's also has the right to
say wow thank you for sharing that Here's a box,
go clean out your desk. Right. And have a nice
day. Right. There are consequences to everything.
But point of point all that being said is called
an amendment. The root word is amend, which means
to change. Right. They were built to change.
Trust me, when they when they had the whole bear
arms thing, it's because we didn't have this
amazingly strong military that could compete
with the rest of the world. We did not. We didn't
have all these municipal police, state police.
armed to the teeth. All of these laws, they're
there to enforce and serve and protect, which
is kind of funny. Yeah, right. Serve and protect
and all that. They realized, well, farmers should
be able to protect their own shit. That's why
they did it. And if you don't like the government
we're building, we're gonna give you guys the
opportunity to come and take it back from us
and do something different if you want. Right.
That's why it was there. That's why that was
there. But everybody's like, no, I'll tell you
right now, that thing guarantees me I'm gonna
have my gun locker full of guns. I got my hunting
rifle. Well, then I got my other hunting rifle.
And then I got a couple crossbows. That ain't
no gun, but still crossbow. And then I got myself
an AK. They probably got an AK. I'm sure they
found it. I got my AR and I got this and I got
that and blah, blah, blah. And they got an arsenal
that like small countries don't have. Right.
One person. It's hilarious, because that's not
the point. And it's an amendment. So people,
oh, they're going to come take my guns. No. Just
like driving, we regulate things. Right. Because
they should be. And it's people like that that
have a cousin or a nephew, you know, full of
adderall and hopes and dreams. And they go in
there and like, bye, I had a bad day at school.
I think we're going to fix that. They go in the
gun locker, they get a gun, and they do. So you
can sit there, and this happens in America again
and again and again and again. Part of why America
is definitely not the greatest country in the
world, because we lead the world in stupid gun
shit. Right. So America, do better, be better.
It's an amendment. When was the last time we
had a constitutional congress? When was the last
time we got together and said, you know what,
let's get in a big room, a bunch of us, and just
look at this shit. Right. See what still applies.
I mean, cities... In towns, they amend shit and
change shit all the time. They have since the
beginning of their inception. But America can
do it. Right. They can look at an amendment and
go, oof, that one's looking dusty. Probably alter
that one, yeah? Yeah, probably. Well, you know,
there's a garbage can. We could just throw it
in there. Maybe we should amend that. Maybe we
should amend that. Huh. How about that? So yeah,
we got work to do, guys, and uh... you know i
think it comes with i think it comes with looking
at the constitution i think it comes with changing
some stuff to where it makes sense you know they
they they did that bear arms thing people had
freaking muskets it took a half a day to to get
it ready to shoot right you know meanwhile we
have weapons today that how many rounds can an
ar i mean right it's not the same thing it's
not even close to the so We got work to do, guys.
We got work to do if we're gonna survive. Because
right now you're seeing the collapse of Russia
is what you're seeing. You are seeing the collapse
of a nation that had a leader, gee, like I wonder
who, that is so full of themselves and only interested
in making money and having oligarchs that are
able to make money and fuck the rest. But that
shit catches up to you. It's catching up to him.
It's gonna catch up to others. It's catching
up to the to the dude that currently lives in
that building. That's Only half standing and
right UFC fight. It's just what a joke. Just
what an absolute joke Anyway, I could go on and
on and on it's a birthday party Yeah, what a
sad party yeah separate there used to be this
commercial back when I was a kid and I think
it was like a public awareness kind of thing
where they like talked about pollution and being
responsible and stuff and it was like this panning
shot of this highway and it just you saw like
old tires and in cans and garbage and all this
stuff. And it pans out and it pans out to someone
collecting the garbage. And then it pans out
even more and it's a Native American. And he's
in his Native American guy, he's got a headdress
on, he's got the whole thing. And then they do
a close -up of his face and this tear comes out
of his eye. And it's like, you think about it
today, it's like, wow, that's pretty impactful
for back then. And it still applies. And it still
applies today. And not just for garbage. Because
garbage is a relative term. Yeah. And we need
to take the garbage out. Mm -hmm. For sure. But
hey, let's be hopeful. Let's do that. Because
there's not a lot to celebrate in its current
form. Sure. So let's just be hopeful. Let's come
up with that idea of what we want it to be. And
let's be hopeful for that. And be like, you know
what? The next 250, let's be better than the
first. Right. I think that's fair. We'll be back.
Bye. All right, we are back everybody and yeah,
I don't know if I should apologize for the rant
or say you're so lucky to have heard that rant.
You're welcome for the rant. You're welcome for
that. The constitutional right to do that. Good
God. Anyway, happy 250 America. Bruised and bloody
and battered, but you're still here. Let's see
if we can clean you up a little bit here, maybe
this year. Get you back on track. But now what
I know we can do is get this show on track. We'll
carpe diem as you find folks send us your DMs
and we read them on the air. They're in the form
of a question. Well, well, I mean... We could
answer them. We could. We have the capability
to do so. This is true. This is true. Will we,
though? Hmm. What is it gonna take? Curious.
Quite. Indeed. Well, like most politicians today...
You could just give us money to gain favor. Right.
You guys seem to like that. So let's do that.
Oh, man. I have this question. I really want
the guys to answer. Cool. Give us $100. Yeah.
Maybe more. It's a donation, really. This is
true. Yeah. It actually goes right back into
the show because then I can go get beer for our
beer review. This is true. Yeah. So you're...
Help us help you help us. Help you? That's the
point. Yeah. God bless. That's what we live for,
honestly. Mm -hmm. Oh, yeah. Well, it is time
for some DMs, and I've got a few here. At Lisa
the Great, liberals understand we will not vote
for anyone who supports ICE, Israel, MAGA, or
war with Iran. Run and progressive or lose. Yeah,
that's fair. Think with how far right the Democratic
Party leadership has swung No longer being a
left -wing party being more of a center -right
party. Mm -hmm. It's no that's not good enough
No, that's not good enough. No more state what
we mentioned this a little earlier too of like
no more status quo billionaire bought corporate
bought bullshitter II mean How how how do you
expect your populace to to remain happy? when
the representatives don't represent them. They
represent whoever funded their campaign the most,
or gave them the most gifts and donations. Right.
Exactly. No. Not gonna pan out. Nope. Not at
all. Uh, at Dave Cubby. CubSweep, Matson Wrigley,
and then in New York at Citi Field. Ha ha. Ha!
Is that a season sweep? That's a... Well, yeah.
I don't know if they play more than seven times,
but seven and oh right now. Yeah. Might be a
season sweep if they don't meet again. Yeah,
thank God for that. If they don't meet again.
That's um... Holy cow. Boy, you heard it here
for yourselves. Broadcasting classes have really
paid off. At Josh Delman Comedy, Jeffries and
Schumer are the most pathetic leaders the Dems
have ever had, so we can complicit time for a
change. Yeah, they're up there in terms of weak
losers. Oh yeah. I would say. Yeah. Ow. Ow. Ow.
What the heck did you do? Ow. Why'd you do that?
Ow. You hurt the table by slamming your knee
into it. Oh my gosh, table, are you okay? Hey,
table. I just smashed my kneecap, man. I got
capped. That's crazy that you would do that to
the table. Man. You know. Oh. I'm just trying
to get comfortable here, folks. Did I just try
to cross my leg? Yeah. Andre, a small table here
in our palatial studio. The studio's not big
on square footage. No, not particularly. It's
a great studio, just a little tight in spots.
I just went to cross my legs, just to be like,
yeah, I'm going to get a little comfortable here,
and decided to... Knee the table right in its
groin bad decision. It's terrible. Yeah terrible
and Gonna have to visit the ER now for my knee
not that we as Americans get health insurance
We don't we don't we go to the doctor and we
ignore the bill. You'll be on the hook for at
least 15 grand Yep. Yep. So that's that's something
else. That's Great here a small price to pay
for crossing the legs Really? Yeah. Yeah, no
doubt. What a steal I went to cross my legs and
now I'm in chapter seven. Thanks, America. Yeah,
that's just the way we work here. But yes, time
for a change. Yeah. I agree, Mr. Comedy Man.
At Russia, Russia, Russia. That's funny. Ukraine
is about to take Crimea back from the Russians.
Slava, Ukraine. You know what the Russians are
thinking? Cry me a river like hey like Justin
Timberlake the thing he did You know the thing
that's you know, um, it's what you know, the
it was the Justin Timbers I think it was Justin
Timberlake song It wasn't saying about Crimea
Crimea River River. I don't know if there's a
lot of rivers in Crimea, but he made a whole
song about it Did he know I could be wrong. I
thought it was Justin Timberlake. I know No,
I think you got the you got the artist, right?
Okay, cool. Yeah, you got that. Oh What am I
missing? So much So much now we understand why
this country is in the shape. It's in hmm Well
anyway That's a perfect segue to my last one.
You had no notes about the DM you got No, no,
I probably I probably should have I should have
done a little research on Or not, I don't know.
Anyway, my last one is from at stonerstanley420.
Happy birthday to the flag, Momo and Alan. I
ate some cake and smoky smoky in the van. Squirrel
day for all, bye. And you know what? That's your
goddamn right as an American. It is to eat cake
and smoky smoky with a squirrel. In the van with
the squirrel, yeah. That sounds like a good day.
Squirrel day for all. Yeah. Where'd he get the
cake? Yeah, because he was what? He was stuck
on the Dollar Tree or Dollar General for a while.
Yeah, and then he got out of there. Just jacked
a cake and forgot about it. Right. And then he
had this battle with the squirrel forever, but
now apparently they're friends. They're frenemies?
Friends? Yeah, something. Sure friends? Yeah.
I don't know. Maybe we should change it from
Independence Day to Squirrel Day. I think we
should. Until we are actually once again independent.
Independent. From corporate and billionaire interests.
True. Yeah, we should change the name. Yeah,
Squirrel Day. Squirrel Day. I'm all for Squirrel
Day. Yeah. All right, you got some DMs there.
Sir? I do have one here from, at Blomkum1. What's
a reality check that people need to hear? A reality
check. That people need to hear. Since we're
talking about it, you, lovely listener, will
never be a billionaire. Chances are you won't
ever be a millionaire. Stop bootlicking. What
the fuck goes on in your mind, in your silly
mind that you're bootlicking billionaires and
trillionaires. I never understand why the working
class doesn't understand. These people have exploited
you to become billionaires and trillionaires.
Yeah. They're not going to stumble upon your
kind tweet and be like, oh, hey, you're a millionaire
now. I just gave you the, no. Stop bootlicking.
I would agree. I would agree. I had one and then
I lost it when you were winning. Oh, sorry. Sorry.
We can just keep going. Not bad. We can go. I
guess another reality check is don't wear capris.
Don't wear capris? Okay. Yeah. It's like you
get the uncomfortability of like tight jeans,
but then you risk sunburn on your shins for no
reason. Oh. You could just wear jeans or you
could just wear shorts. Don't do the in -between.
I never understood Capris. Nah, I don't either.
I don't either. Oh, I remembered mine. Oh, yeah.
Get to me. Oh, god. Getting old sucks. Anyway,
mine is... Are you ready, ladies and gentlemen?
You will never be able to retire. Yeah. They
should take that word out of the English language
because there is not one person other than these
billionaire assholes that is going to be able
to retire. Impossible. You're gonna squirrel
money away into your savings. Oh no, car broke
down. Well, there it goes. And then you start
squirreling away again. Oh, washer and dryer.
And there it goes again. Right. Rinse, repeat,
rinse, repeat, rinse, repeat. Now you're 60.
Well, shit. There's not much in there as I thought
there would be. Well, or your 401ks, right? Remember
those? Remember your nice little 401ks you had
in, I don't know, say 2007, 2008 that all went
bye -bye? Bye -bye. Bye -bye. If you have money
and a 401k, you need help. I am not a psychological
professional therapist. I'm not. I can't coach
you there. I can tell about my own journeys.
But what I can say is if you trust financial
institutions for the betterment of your future.
For anything. Just take all your money. and put
it in a big pile and just set it on fire. Yeah.
Because that's where it's going anyway. Or you
can just give it to me and I'll do something
better with it. Put a quarter on your ass because
you played yourself. Boom. I love that. Got him.
Got another DM here from at can't touch this.
Don't get us copyright claimed. Wait a minute.
You just sang the whole purple song. I don't
think I thought that was public. Purple man.
Hey, that's enough of that. I think it's public
domain. Is it? Pretty sure that one's public
domain. Okay. Yeah. I think we're good. You sure?
I think we're good. Okay. Alright. Let's go around.
I was a little worried because you literally
sang like two minutes of the song. I've been
around long enough. I don't even think I sang
the words right. I don't think I actually...
Never mind. No, that one's copyrighted. That
sucks. At Can't Touch This asks, what time of
day do you think Hammer Time actually was? It's
Hammer Time. Boom, boom, doo, doo. Afternoon?
Can't Touch Me. When is hammer time? And what
does it mean? Well... Is it just when you listen
to MC Hammer? Well... There's a way I could explain
it. Kinda like... I think it's just when you
start applauding. I mean, I do applaud after
I listen to MC Hammer. You realize he was like
a vicious crip? What? Yeah. Are you kidding me?
Yeah. Like, people were terrified of him. Of
MC Hammer? Yeah. That's cool. Yeah. I think Michael
Jackson was a crip too. He had a song called
Blue Gangster, so I think that kind of solves
that. Michael Jackson did? Yeah. That's... That's
pretty awesome. I think Hammer Time's gotta be
an afternoon thing. Post 5pm. Well, it's kind
of like the song Afternoon Delight. Afternoon
Delight. You know they're singing it on Anchorman?
Yeah. Okay. Kind of like that. So it is an afternoon
thing. Yeah, the way you look at me like I'm
fucking now I think we're just I think we're
missing the point of hammer time I mean the whole
the whole choreographed dance was pretty good,
but I don't know how no, but they're not they're
not going home and working on their basement
They're not putting up drywall and like framing
a wall with their hammer either that or dancing
because they did a whole dance with it they they
did but they're talking hammer time clapping
doesn't hammer either i think you'd hurt your
hand on the nail oh okay so it is an afternoon
delight it's then and indeed it is yes hammer
time your confusion confuses me oh no i got a
final final dm here i received today from at
not your FBI man, would you take $10 million
with the stipulation that you have to go into
witness protection and cut off everyone? Yep.
Yep. Just take it. See you later. Yep. I'm just,
I don't know. I think that's maybe a more difficult
decision for people that are younger. I think
for people that are older, because typically
when people get older, their close relationships
and friendships tend to dwindle over time. So
I think it's an easier decision for me. Fuck,
I don't even have a dog, you know? I could just
pack up shop and just go, you know? And like,
have an agreement with you that like, hey, every
now and then you get a postcard or something
from Uncle Howdy. That's the code name? That'll
be me. That'll be me. I made it to Tijuana. Love
Uncle Howdy. Love Uncle Howdy. Cool. So I think
I could do that and still stay within the guarantees
of this particular $10 million and what you get
it for. Yeah. It's kind of what we call a workaround,
but I would do it. Yeah. I'd do it tomorrow.
Damn. I think I'd just set my stuff on fire and
go. I don't think I could. I respect the hustle.
Traveling to Tijuana does sound beautiful. But
yeah, I think that's a no. I don't know if there
is a price tag I would take. To just disappear?
Yeah. Yeah, I don't think so. Like I said, I'd
have to find a workaround for certain things,
but largely I could go. Yeah. I could go. Ski
-dattle. Yeah. Well, and you know me too. If
I said, Aidan, I'll bet you $100 I can go out
and make five new friends today, you would not
take that bet. Nah. You would not take that bet,
because you're like, oh my god, you might do
it in an hour. Right. Because that's me. According
to my friend Brian Donovan, that's my superpower.
Yeah. It's my ability to immediately connect
with people and befriend them. And I think that
is quite the skill. We have the power of yapping.
We do. We have the power of yapping. I just don't
do it often in public, which is why I feel so
confident on camera or behind the mic, because
I'm like, Ain't no one judging me in this moment.
I think I'm good. Right. Yeah. Yeah, because
I can do it. I take the $10 million and I'll
have 10 new friends by the end of the week. Yeah,
that's true. So I think I'll make it work and
I'll keep a diary from Uncle Howdy and then I'll
have instructions for my one of my close new
friends to be like, hey, mail this to these five
people or these 10 people so they know what Uncle
Howdy's been up to. Right. So yeah, I think I
would do it. Fair point. Yeah, man. Yeah. That
was your last one. It was. All right. Well, we
have a little bit different line up here today.
So we're going to take a break in a minute. But
when we do and we always come back, we do our
signature segment, which is called You Just Made
the List. We're doing a double. All right. This
quarter pounder is now a double today. Holy shit.
It's a double Royale with cheese. It's a double
Royale with cheese. So we're going to have two
top 10 lists for you today. You just made the
lists. Lists. Yeah. Wow. Lists. Lists. Funny
how lists sounds like lisp. It kind of does.
And we have to be careful with that because we
don't have a pop filter on this mic. We don't.
We don't. Pop, pop, pop. People are going to
be like, oh, my ears. Oh, Jesus. um so yeah so
we got a little bit of uh of a different lineup
here today and something fun at the end as well
so uh a little bit different for the old 250
happen bird day to uh merica happy squirrel day
happy squirrel day that's right we changed it
uh at any rate before we take that break uh other
foods aiden scowers the globe for other foods
and they're usually not super great Makes me
scared of humans, really. But, I'm interested.
What do you got? Today, from the country of America,
the one we've been talking about all day, I have
the strangest sandwiches I could find online.
Now, I'm sure a couple of these are bits, but
I know for damn sure a couple of these are real
things people enjoy, which terrifies me. So,
strangest sandwiches I could find from the USA.
Online. We've got one here, which is an infamous
Subway order, tuna salad sandwich, added meatballs
and marinara. Oh. God, why? That's awful. By
the way, I thought I'd throw this out because
I heard this on a different, slightly less inferior
radio show. Less inferior? Uh -huh. It's not,
yeah. Less inferior means superior. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. Dude, four hours of sleep. I've been awake
for like 44. Give me a break. Inferior. So it's
funnier and it's less inferior. Oh my god. Oh
my god. We can fix that in post, although this
guy won't do it. I'm not gonna do it. No. This
inferior show stated that in Tuna, in Subway,
there is... Zero. Tuna. In the tuna. In Subway.
No shit. None. Zero. Okay, I'm just gonna say,
for legal reasons, that is something you heard
from a third party source, and we cannot supply
its validity, so you were to take that with many
grains of salt, perhaps even a whole salt block,
but that is an interesting factoid. Zero tuna.
It's an interesting allegation. From somebody
else, not us. We do not allege that. Yo, man.
See, I was just hanging out. And yo, homie came
up, said, yo, dude, that tuna is Subway. Ain't
none in there. Shit, fake. Aw, hell no. Yeah.
Yeah, there's none. None in there. It's just,
it's not, it's not, no. It's just, it's bad.
We've heard people say. Oh, God. It's not a...
We've heard people say. Yeah. So I would just...
I would veer away. The tuneless tuna, some people
think. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. So anyway, as
I say, it's what I've heard. It's what you've
heard. It's what I've heard. The rumor is...
The rumor's out. The rumor is there is no fish.
Fish byproducts for some shit. Yeah, it's bad
fishlessness. I mean somebody's not great anyway,
but yeah, that's that's that's an opinion This
is true. Yeah, there's another sandwich here,
which is a it's a cookie sandwich So the bottom
bun is a cookie chocolate chip cookie. Oh Mayo
roast beef mayo top cookie. You following along?
Yeah How's that sound? Yeah No crunchy cookie
mushy roast beef and mayo okay all right hang
on so what's good what's catching you up with
that okay the thing that's can't catch up the
thing that's that's that's that's got me tripped
up is you say a cookie now uh -huh it could be
the blandest sugarless cookie ever and it may
work they did specify chocolate chip cookie did
they I didn't hear yeah Chocolate chip chocolate
chip cookie. Oh fuck that now because the argument
starts to crumble like the chocolate chip cookie
You're just oh man you're in it today. Oh my
god. Yeah, that's an that's a no for me Yeah,
and then this one I know is a joke sandwich,
but I thought I'd bring it up. It's quote -unquote
the mayo overload It is a simple white or wheat
bun. Okay with no vegetables or meats simply
A bottle of mayonnaise. A mayo sandwich. Mayo
sandwich. Yep. Now, I will go on record in saying
I do like mayonnaise. So many applications. So
many applications. I feel as it's kind of the
redheaded stepchild, although it's white, of
the condiments. of the world. It gets bullied,
but it can go in so many things. Chipotle mayo?
Get real. Right. You can take mayo and be like,
oh, I'm going to, you know, I'm going to take
a little sriracha and just bloop bloop. And now
it's fire. Now it's magical. There's a lot you
can do with that. And I agree. I much prefer
having a little thing of mayo and dipping my
fries in it. I can get down with that. As opposed
to ketchup. I do like gravy, too. That's kind
of more like English and Irish to take your quote
unquote chips and dip them in gravy. That's a
solid play, too. Genius maneuver. It is a genius
maneuver. It's halfway to poutine. It kind of
is. Yeah. Yeah, you're almost there. I do rather
enjoy mayo on a lot of different, it has a lot
of different applications. But mayo is a condiment.
Not as the star of the show. Not the star of
the show. Yeah. Is not the star. Because then
with that logic, you can be like, man, check
out this great sandwich. And you bite into it
and be like, oh my god. And be like, yeah, man,
it's a mustard sandwich. Two pieces of white
Wonder Bread and a bunch of yellow mustard. That
just sounds gross. To be fair, it sounds more
flavorful than a mayo sandwich. Than a mayo sandwich.
Yeah. Yeah. We've got some here, quote unquote,
historical blunders. of sandwiches. Oh, this
is like your classic 1950s. We're just going
to make dumb shit. Yeah. The peanut butter and
mayo sandwich. No. Yeah, not convinced. No. No.
Like, I've heard peanut butter and cheese and
that sounds nasty. Yeah. Peanut butter and mayo,
that sounds nasty. I'm not down with that. No.
No, not at all. And I've heard people do peanut
butter and Nutella and I see that working. Oh,
it's two different nuts. Add chocolate. These
nuts. There's the banana salmon sandwich. Now
while fun to say... Banana salmon. Banana salmon
sandwich. That's fun to say. We'll take two.
Take two? Three orange whips. I'll have what
he's having. Yeah, no, that... Well, I mean,
I'm not having a salmon sandwich, period. Adding
a banana is not helping that situation. No, not
at all. It sounds like something to induce vomiting,
rather than something you would keep down as
sustenance. Right. Yeah. Like if your kid comes
up, he's like, dad, my stomach hurts. I got something
for you. Banana salmon. Take a bite. Eat all
of it, Timothy. Go on. You're welcome. It's called
boot and rally, son. Get back to work. And the
last sandwich I will bring up today on other
foods is the garbage pail, which is a warm sandwich,
you could argue. It's bread. Microwaved bananas,
mushed, bacon Nutella mayonnaise. No. No? Here's
the no. No. Why would you do that? I mean, banana
Nutella, that makes total sense. You could do
that. Why not get a little bowl and do your little
mashup of the two in a little bowl. That's a
nice little snack. You don't even have to mix
them up. You can just do like little banana slices,
banana disks with your Nutella. That sandwich
is fine. That makes sense. no here's the thing
though not even put that in the sandwich just
have a little bowl that on the side oh sure and
just take your sandwich and just have it be are
you ready yeah bacon bread dry bread bacon dry
bread yep dip it in the sweet sauce nope oh Oh,
just have them separately. Just eat the bacon.
Oh, I see. Oh, just eat the bacon. Just eat the
bacon. And then leave the other shit. Right,
exactly. BLT, no L or T. Open face, eat your
bacon, throw the bread away, and then just dip
your bananas in that. That's how you handle that
situation. Look, they're all going to come together
in your stomach anyway. Let them party there.
Yeah. But my mouth does not need to be the vehicle.
For all of them to entertain they don't have
to enter the club together is what I'm saying.
We're not a concrete mixer No, yeah, we don't
need all the ingredients at once. Nope. Nope
They just no no send to send them and into the
club in different doors or so I don't know send
that to the delete folder delete. Yes Absolutely
delete. Oh, well, that's the last sandwich. That's
the last one Wow, those are those are nasty you're
welcome So yeah, if you got a nasty sandwich
share it with us we would we would love to hear
if we could do like fan -sourced part two were
sandwiches oh I'm all for that I know Jeff Daniels
shared I think it might have been with Colbert
shared a sandwich that he made and Colbert's
like no way and then he tried it on his show
which was pita bread okay you take peanut butter
yeah and a good spreading on the pita the interior
yep okay well no it's just like an actual open
pita so you're not gonna just an open open pita
yeah cover it in peanut butter crushed cheddar
ruffles on top of the peanut butter okay yeah
um and that is supposed to be good i don't see
it i don't see it oh i missed an ingredient i'm
so sorry i peeked the mic you're welcome um the
secret ingredient i forgot was Baby Ray's barbecue
sauce. What in the? Dude, dude. Barbecue sauce,
crunched cheddar ruffles on a bed of peanut butter,
on a pita. Jeffrey, Mr. Daniels. We love you,
by the way. Do we? Oh yeah. Not if he makes that.
That's your signature sandwich? You attribute,
Jeffrey, you attribute your name to that? What
are you doing? Okay, I'm going to say. As a challenge,
maybe we do this on our other foods for the season
seven premiere. That we, live on the show, try
that. We get the cheddar ruffles, we get the
pita, and the peanut butter. Not that crunchy
peanut butter. Look, for people that eat crunchy
peanut butter. Or the people that make it, even
more so for the people that make it. That's incomplete.
If you bring that to me, and I'm a teacher, and
you bring your homework, I go, that's an incomplete.
That is not a finished product. Crunchy peanut
butter is not a finished product. It's like,
they're halfway through the process, and they
go, nah, that's good. And then they put the lid
on it, and that's it. Be like, hey, Jerry, you
didn't finish mashing that peanut butter up.
That's crunchy peanut butter. Send it. Send it.
Exactly. So yeah, crunchy peanut butter, what
are you doing? It's not a finished product. You
know those crunchy peanut butters where it's
like the all -natural ones where the oil sits
at the top? Instead of like palm oil, which is
bad for the environment to deforest for palm
oil. Yeah. But I think it just has like peanut
oil or something in it. That consistency. Imagine
a human being chewing raw peanuts halfway. Add
a little salt in their mouth, a touch of sugar,
and then mama birding that into your mouth. Mmm.
That's the end of that sentence. Just imagine
that. I wish I could un -imagine it. You're welcome.
Oh, God. Well, if you're still listening, this
is the Mark Mo Show. And we just talked about
some incredibly disgusting sandwiches here with
you today. And I want to say that America brought
all of this to you. For future ponds, for spacious
skies, moon and space of man. All right, we are
back here on the Mark Mo Show. I'm your host,
Mark Maloney, along with Aidan Maloney, and we're
on to our feature segment. You just made the
list here on the Mark Mo Show, and we have a
double. It's a double header, if you will. It's
a double quarter pounder with cheese. The Royale.
The Royale with cheese. Top 10 list today, 10
through two, our big number one reveal, and the
all important rule, there are no rules. So true.
Thank God for that. Top 10 today, greatest American
achievements, but also another top 10 list, greatest
American f -ups. Whoa! How about that? It's just
like anything. There's the good and the bad.
Yeah. And there you have the facts of life. You're
welcome. That's so true. Mm -hmm. Some people
don't think so. I think they're silly. They're
silly. Very silly. Incredibly silly. Thanks for
tuning in, folks. Great commentary. Have a great
rest of the day. Yeah, god damn it. Okay. Top
10 greatest American achievements. Aidan, why
don't you kick us off? Okay. Today, number 10,
greatest American achievements, finishing the
Panama Canal. Yeah. That's huge. I believe it
was the French who started it, if I'm not mistaken,
and then they just kind of bailed. Wove flew
the white flag per usual They love you friends.
He's kind of bailed and then America stepped
in it was like actually having this canal would
be kind of baller Yeah, we finished that that's
pretty huge as huge number nine independence
from Britain yay fucking Brits fix your teeth.
Hey, what are you talking about? Yeah, well crumpet
no I don't And keep your warm bear. Crumpets
and Tay. Crumpets and Tay. Number eight on my
list. First humans on the moon. Oh, yeah. Yeah.
That's right. Armstrong and Aldrin. United States
of moon, y 'all. The United States of the moon.
Let's go. We claim the light side. Oh, no. Number
seven on my list. The polio vaccine. Oh, that's
a good one. Huge. Huge. I mean, the amount of
medicine that comes out of this country is kind
of astounding. If only we had health care. How
about that? It's amazing back in the day when
we used to cure all kinds of stuff, but now there's
so much money in just treating it. Why cure it?
I mean, there was a man that sold the patent
to the insulin vaccine for $1 because he wanted
to help people. And then big pharma stepped in
and they were like, oh no. We're not doing that.
No, sir. We're going to make billies. Get out
of here, you silly guy, you. Number six on my
list of best American achievements, assisting
and winning World War II. There you go. It was
truly the allied powers that all came together
in an allied effort, if you will. Yeah, that
was literally the, for pro wrestling fans, that
was literally the hot tag of World War II. Right,
right. Britain's out there just getting their
asses handed to them and that they they're kind
of reaching and like the other guy's hand is
like right there and he's like I don't know if
I can do it and the Germans got him by the leg
and then the last second he tags us in tornado
tag and like right Russia and the u .s. We're
both like oh, dude Let us cook let us cook exactly
number five on my list I've combined civil rights
and union rights Equally important. I believe
and of course that's that's all class solidarity.
That's that's class solidarity of working people
Coming together and being like hey It'd be cool
if we all have rights. Yeah. Yeah, how about
that? Yeah, and then you know all the swine owned
by the government's You know built to protect
capital kind of got in the way, but hey, yeah,
we got the dub We got the dough number four on
my list tied for fourth place, inventing transistors,
microprocessors, and GPS. Tied them all. They're
all technological. Can I be honest here with
you? Sure. When you, that was your number four,
right? That was my number four. Okay. When you
said number four, and you just yelled out the
word tied, I thought, well, I mean, detergent
is nice. I don't know if I'd rank it that highly,
but okay. And then you went on and I'm like,
tied. Tied for fourth place. Yeah. Got it. Yeah.
See, Gain would have made the list, but I think
tied smells better. For sure. Transistors, microprocessors,
and GPS are all tied for fourth place on my list.
Number three on my list, very near and dear to
my heart. I love music. So number three, blues.
jazz, soul, and hip hop. I love it. Yeah. Got
to throw those on there. And number two, inventing
airplanes. Yeah. Pretty huge. That's huge. I'll
save my big number one reveal. Oh, all right.
OK. Top 10 greatest American achievements. Number
10, American universities and research institutions.
For many of those things that get invented, American
universities and research institutions are usually
played their part. They have played their part.
So number nine, motion pictures. Oh, yeah. Because
other than that, it was like books and just people
sitting around the fire telling a story. All
of a sudden, hey, what if we had this picture
and it kind of moved and we could tell a story?
Whoa. What? The birth of young Hollywood. I love
it. Yeah. Yep. Good stuff. Number eight, creation
of the National Parks Service. Oh, that's a good
one. Yeah. Which is a good one, because the billionaires
would just buy it all up and turn it to shit.
Or sell it to overseas companies. Right. So it's
important that we... You know, we still have
some of that left. I've been to some of them,
and it's just gorgeous. Even after they've been
gutted by the current administration, they're
hanging on. They're hanging on. We're not giving
up, boys. Nope. Number seven, the space race
and moon landing. There you go. Number six, popular
music, blues, jazz, rock, hip hop, and I put
country on there. I don't like country, but...
Could be transposed to American folk. Sure. If
you will. Bluegrass, American folk, whatever.
We're fine. Number five, the Erie Canal. Transformed
commerce in an early America was absolutely key
to that for sure. Being able to connect the Great
Lakes with the ocean. Yeah, that is true. That's
a good one to have on there. I like that. Yep.
Number four, the founding of a constitutional
republic. It's a big one. It's a big one. It's
a big one. Number three, the civil rights movement.
which I could very easily kind of do what you
did and put, you know, workers' rights on there
as well. Number two, first in flight, Orville
and Wilbur Wright. So we did have some that were
similar. Yeah, this is true. We were talking
about that off mic, lovely listeners, about like,
oh, I wonder how many of these will be Samesies
on. A little handful. Yeah, for sure. A little
handful. Time for number ones. Number one. Number
one, I went invention again. ARPANET and the
internet. Oh, that's good. Yeah, that's that's
what's shaped the modern era for better for worse.
I think until it became hyper corporate and billionaire
owned. I think the internet was a fantastic one
of the biggest inventions maybe in human history
aside from electricity which then led to internet,
you know, but yeah, it's it's just There's no
words to describe how huge it is because it's
most of how people interact now. Global connectivity
was something 40, 50 years ago completely foreign.
Completely foreign. How much did a long -distance
call cost? Now you can FaceTime someone in India
for essentially free right now if you wanted
to and had the access. I think it's beautiful.
That's why it's my number one. Oh yeah, for sure.
Well, we'll see if you still feel the same way
after they create Skynet, and then there's Terminators
everywhere, and the Italian world blows up, and
then we've got these metal things killing humanity.
But anyway, my number one is the abolishment
of slavery. Yeah, totally fair totally fair number
one. Yeah, that's that's a that's a good one
And it's it's not like America invented slavery
The slave trade has been on this globe in every
country on every continent and even say with
prison slave labor It's kind of still kind of
still around. Just looks a little bit different.
But yeah, I I think being able to abolish slavery
was pretty huge. And even after the abolishment
of it, it still took a lot of time for African
-Americans to, you know, to get a right to jobs
and education and everything else. And yeah,
voting. And it's still a challenge. So, oh, they're
still systemic. It's segregation segregation
racism. Yeah, we know it's out there. So But
we've come we've come away. Yes, this is true.
This is true We will we will at least say that
now the second you just made the list to be fair
before we continue I just want to say I thought
these lists were great. I thought Whether invention
heavy or history heavy. I thought we covered
a lot of a lot of the good. I think so, too.
Yeah Really? I mean, and that was kind of how
we set the tone for the show, too. It's just
kind of like, look, you know, America's imperfect.
But it's also been the blueprint for so many
other democracies and democratic republics all
over the world. But it also has its flaws. Yeah,
and calling out and addressing imperfections
is how you make positive change. Yes, correct.
Yep. Oh, you're being so patriotic. No, we're
not. No. No, we're not. Actually, having a show
like this is about as patriotic as it gets. Right.
I would agree. So take your flag and shove it
in the potted plant in your front porch. For
futures more than purple sky. Whatever. Whatever.
Mountains of majesty. Anyway. The top 10 greatest
American f -ups. So take the good, take the bad,
take them all there, yeah. Yep, I guess here's
the bad, huh? Next life, baby. Yep. I'll start
mine this time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there you go.
Number 10, Juneteenth Tulsa Massacre. Yeah. Large
groups of white people, many of whom had been
deputized and given weapons by city officials,
destroyed more than 35 square blocks of a fluent
black Wall Street area in Greenwood District
in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Yeah. Yeah, that's fucked.
Not our proudest moment. No. And that was your
number 10. That was my number 10. So buckle up.
That's all I'm saying. Here we go. Nine, nine,
11. I love the clip of... Norm MacDonald. I don't
know if he was on a podcast or a radio show,
but there was just like a touch of a lull in
silence, and then Norm is just like, 9 -11. Everyone
bust out laughing. Just like that Norm MacDonald
magic of just being like, 9 -11. What an underrated
dude. Rest in peace, man. No doubt. Number eight,
the Vietnam War. Oh God, yeah. And then how we
treated the Vietnam veterans when they got back.
Awful. Both combined. Awful, you can take both
of those. Number seven, the Jim Crow laws and
racial segregation. Number six, January 6th.
Yeah, that's about right. That one belongs on
there for sure. That was a shit show. Number
five, the Great Depression. Checks out. Checks
out. Great Depression. So America knows how I
feel. Number four, Native American displacement,
the Trail of Tears. Oh, yeah. Good guy. That's
a good one to have on there. Number three, the
Civil War. That's kind of funny. It's kind of
a big thing that happened. It's not great. I
mean, it happened for a purpose. Right. You know,
sometimes things like that have to happen to
become better. Yeah. But still must be. It's
a pretty big low. As a low. Number two. Japanese
internment camps during World War II. Oh, fuck,
yeah. And that was done, that was done under
FDR. Right. So it's like, that's kind of messed
up. Yeah. We're gonna take all the Japanese people.
We're just, we're gonna throw them in a quote
unquote camp. Right. It sounds oddly familiar
to the people we were fighting at the time. Yeah,
at the time. Right. Interesting. Yeah, right.
The only difference was we didn't gas them, but
we didn't exactly treat them like model citizens
either. Hell no. Treat them like shit. Yeah.
Is this not, once again, not a good look for
us at all. Terrible. We're gonna put all these
guys in a camp. Oh camp, camp's so fun, so we'll
roast marshmallows and little canoes. No. It's
gonna be in this Dust Bowl area of the country
and they're gonna be starving and they're gonna
be sick. And it makes me worried how few school
kids out there probably learn about that part
of World War II. They don't. They don't. They
don't. Because everything's whitewashed. Or don't
even learn about the Trail of Tears. It's unbelievable.
So that was number two. Alrighty, I guess I'll
start my 10 through 2 worst American fuck -ups.
Number 10, the Great Depression and the Great
Recession. I tied them at number 10 because they're,
in my opinion, equally as bad. Oh, yeah. Number
nine, never -ending warfare and imperialism.
Doesn't matter what decade it's in, America's
doing it. Yeah, oh yeah. America's doing it,
just happens a lot of it tends to be in the Middle
East. Yep. Or in the islands. Right. Number eight,
which of course leads me to number eight, the
military industrial complex. Oh yeah, Eisenhower
warned us about that. Oh, let's give these people
a trillion dollars a year instead of, oh I don't
know, healthcare and properly funded schools.
Fucking assholes. Number seven, tied at number
seven. Not tied. The detergent. I got it now.
I got it. Tied at number seven, the Tuskegee
Syphilis Study and the Tulsa Massacre. That one
almost made it. Yeah. Just fucking foul. Just
disgusting. If anyone is unfamiliar, because
I know they don't teach that shit in schools
either, do a little research on the Tuskegee
Syphilis Study or Tulsa Massacre. If you haven't
heard of them, it will disturb you that our country
did this. Yep. Number six. Citizens United and
the NRA. Oh. Yeah. A lot of where we're at today
is because of those two quote -unquote organizations.
Number, oh okay, tied for number five. I kind
of grouped these all together because it's all
the same, kind of the same shit. Number five,
Ronald Reagan, the AIDS crisis, Iran Contra,
and the Reagan tax breaks for wealthy and big
corpo. That's all tied at number five. Yeah.
Because that was all that administration. That
was that administration, yeah. Number four, overturning
Roe v. Wade. Terrible. Unfucking believable.
Number three, advancing the global scourge of
late -stage capitalism. Wow. Wow. Yeah. It's
a heavy one, but it's real and it's happening.
Oh, yeah. And number two, electing Donald Trump
twice. That's really good. Yeah. I'll save my
number one. Yeah, we really shit the bed on that
one. Yeah, that's uh, I kind of wish I had that
on there. My number one is a tie. Whoa! It's
a tie. Tied? A detergent? No, just a tie. Man,
you must hate the smell. I do. Oh, clean laundry?
Ew. Clean laundry? How gross. These jeans? I've
worn them for five weeks straight. Slavery. Yeah.
And the assassination of John F. Kennedy. You
hear that CIA? You hear that? Assholes. Nice
job. Could also add the assassination of MLK
Jr. That could be on there as well. Yep. Yeah,
that was... You hear that, FBI? Don't ask this.
Yeah, that's... Every time I say the word slavery...
there's a podcast i listen to called bad friends
which is hilarious oh yeah i love those guys
and bobby lee is just a funny well santino is
funny too they're both funny and they had this
little bit and they were talking about creating
this movie um where he is the only Korean member
of the Confederate Army. I remember you showed
me that. Oh my god, that is funny. And he's like,
Yeah, what would your name be? He goes Robert
E Lee. I thought that was I thought there's hilarious.
You know, he's like, What do we want? He goes
slavery. It was so funny. It was I was crying.
Yeah, but not great. Yeah, not great. We got
rid of it. Is the kind way to say it. We got
rid of it, but it took a while. Too long. Yeah.
Even those pompous farmers who founded the country
had a few. Or a dozen. Or a dozen. Or maybe mated
with them and had offspring. Thomas Jefferson.
Or stole their teeth and put them in their own
skull. George. Yeah. Hey, dental problems. What
are you gonna do? Jesus Christ. It's a joke.
It's a joke. Yeah, we have to explain ourselves
now because of the French. It's all their fault.
Oh yeah, there's some backstory there. There's
some backstory there. Oh my good lord. Just a
slight beef with the French online. It's okay.
Now Washington's pants are gonna come after us.
My number one worst American fuckup, the two
-party first -past -the -post system, in my opinion,
has led Directly, indirectly, indirectly to where
we are today. Yeah. It is precisely what we were
warned about. A divided house cannot stand. Right.
What do we do? We fucking divided it. Right in
half. Yep. And then instead of doing, oh, I don't
know, five, six different political parties where
everyone could feel like, oh, well, I think that
person represents me best. Right. And then doing
ranked choice voting and having election day
be a federal holiday so everyone votes. We decided,
nah, fuck that. And then I went to college because
that's stupid too. Oh, by far. I think that precisely
is why we are where we are today. And I am 100
% certain. Imagine how much more advanced we'd
be if we didn't have all of that shit. We'd be
so much further advanced. Right. And people would
feel like they're being represented. They'd be
represented. I think the overall quality of life
for people would be better. We'd have cures for
fucking diseases. Like, it would just be better.
Right. Right. Anyway. Yeah. Anywho. That's my
number one. That's, uh, that's, uh, that's it.
That's... That's a great one. Yeah. And let us
know, of course, lovely listeners, is there something
we missed on the achievements list? Yeah. Is
there something we missed on the fuck -ups list?
No doubt. Or failed to mention, because I'm sure
there were some things we skipped. I'm sure.
There's a lot to pick from. Oh, yeah. There's
a lot to pick from. There's a lot to pick from.
There's a lot to pick from. Heck, UFC. Yeah.
I mean, not this part. The second half. The second
half. The second half. Yeah. It's not what makes
America great. That's for sure. Yeah. Boy more
CTE. Yay Yeah, didn't they do that whole gladiator
thing once in Rome and then shortly after it
fell apart Yeah, isn't that the whole point of
like traditional martial arts is it's it's a
sport, right? But you have protective gear so
no one actually gets severely injured, right?
but then you have people like dying in boxing
rings and yeah and Like, their brains crumble
by the age of 29 in the UFC. It's like, what?
That's not a martial art. That's fucking gladiators,
dude. People are dying young. Right. Like, the
guy is on top of another guy, like, punch the
head. Punch to the head. punch the head and like
Jesus Christ he's already dead anytime now right
stop it the ref is just like T posing in the
corner like yes this is a fight he's sitting
his vape and looking at his phone going oh shit
yeah don't do that anymore please let them brawl
let them brawl yeah and then like they go in
there and do the thumbs up or thumbs down like
a gladiator get the guillotine you shall fight
no more Oh boy. Alright everybody we are in the
home stretch of the season 6 finale 250 and happy
birthday. Mr. Marka. Happy Squirrel Day. Happy
Squirrel Day. Host Mark Maloney along with Aidan
Maloney. And we now are on to our beer review.
The official beer review. The official beer review
here on the Mark Mo Show. And it is summertime,
which means it is time for one of my favorite
kinds of beer, which are shandies. Now, I rather
enjoy making my own. sure if you do it properly
which is a a lager beer you can even use a light
which is fine and a carbonated lemonade like
there's company called ice that makes a bunch
of these drinks like they have a carbonated lemonade
so you can find them they're more readily available
to our neighbors to the north don't use regular
lemonade because there's no there's no fizzy
in it you're gonna flatten the beer you're gonna
flatten the beer so it's not gonna be the same
thing so i encourage finding some fizzy worst
case scenario you could use a sprite or a seven
up yeah or if you have a soda stream or a soda
stream you could do that lemonade yourself you
could do that yourself that's true too but carbonated
lemonade is the way you want to go if you're
going to create your own and then you can use
a Oh God, a Miller Light, a Coors Light. Like
that's what I would use. If you had like a Yangling,
that would probably be really good. Yeah. And
that carbonated lemonade. Ah, chef's kiss. Yes.
But if you're not going to make your own, there
are some out there that are pretty good. This
one I had not seen before. It is a seasonal from
the company Shiner. I will let Aiden get into
that. This is the Shiner. Raspberry Lemonade
Shandy. It is 4 .2 % ABV, so it's approximately
what you would see in a light lager itself. It
is from the Spetzel Brewery, hopefully I'm pronouncing
that right. It is out of Shiner, Texas, US of
A, regional brewery, so a little bit larger than
your micro brews, but it's not like a Miller
or a... An Anheuser -Busch or something. Correct.
As they describe it, We'll be the judge of that
today on our untapped app, where it is free,
we're not sponsored by it, but we use it because
we like ranking beers. On a scale from zero to
five, we'll give you tasting notes. We're drinking
it straight out the bottle today. And let us
know, lovely listener, what you were enjoying.
Yeah, I had to Google map it, because I'm like,
where the hell is Shiner, Texas? I was very curious.
My immediate thought is, yeah, it's got to be
near Austin somewhere. It is somewhat near Austin.
It is due, let me get this right, is due east
of San Antonio. in southeast of Austin by a bit.
It's a little out the ways. It is a small town.
It is a very tiny town. And literally, when you
pull it up on the map thing, the first thing
you see is a Shiner truck. The Shiner branded
F -250. And then a dog sitting under a Sputzel
brewery sign. That's pretty wonderful. It actually
looks really cool. Yeah, kind of Hollywood themed.
Like, if I found myself in San Antonio or Austin,
I might make a day drive. She only kisses me
for the barbecue sauce in my beard. That is something
on a Shiner sign. That's funny. Yeah, so Shiner,
Texas. There you go. How about that? Yeah, the
company is called Spetzel Brewery, spelled S
-P -O -E -T -Z -L. Hopefully we're pronouncing
that right. But it is out of Shiner, Texas. That's
the name. The shandy that is correct. Yep. Absolutely
very very interesting stuff anyway Rank on a
scale from zero to five. Yes. Yes, we use we
use the untapped app for that and So let's let's
get to drinking some Shiner raspberry lemonade
shandy slancho slancho Boy that is pleasant boy
that raspberry smacks you in the face. Oh, yeah,
and for a lot of beers that we've sampled over
the years Like it'll say hints of chocolate or
coffee or this or that and we tried them like
Yeah, I didn't get that. Yeah, we had the one
blood orange IPA The other right. Yeah, and it
was like no. I don't wear I disagree because
it's not there. This is a raspberry Oh, it smacks
in the face. Absolutely that tart raspberry flavor
is so damn good. Holy cow, brother and smooth
I mean super smooth. Yeah, it's not bitter It
is very specifically tart like the tartness you'd
get from a raspberry or a lemon. That is remarkable.
I Really like that. Yeah, it says specifically
here beer brewed with agave and lemon and natural
flavors So it's got agave and lemon. Yeah, I'm
sure just raspberry flavor, but that is really
remarkable Like it even smells really good. That
is fantastic Enjoy that and you can I you can?
Distinctualize the the the raspberry flavor and
the lemon tartness the second sip. I got more
lemon. Yeah, that's really fantastic Oh my goodness
now the lovely listener. We're not sponsored
by any no we're just trying to shoot you straight
Yeah, is it good is it bad? We're beer aficionados,
and this is a good one I'm going pretty high
with this. I think this is fantastic. I enjoy
this. That is so excellent. I'm going up to 425
out of 5. That is definitely in the elite tier
of things we have tried on this show. Probably,
maybe one day we'll have to do a review of all
of our untapped check -ins and be like, oh, here's
what my top 25 is. That would be so super cool.
This might be sneaking into my top 25. Oh, it's
in mine. Might be sneaking in there. Yeah, that's
a 425 out of 5, I really like that. Wow, so excellent.
I got 4 .5. Going up to 4 .5, nice. 4 .5, that
might be one of my highest rankings yet. I think
there was a stout I tried in Chicago once that
I think I had it at 4 .5. But yeah, that is excellent.
That is top tier for sure. 100 % agree. Wow,
very wonderful. And summary. You called it. It's
summery. Like most shandies are, but this is
like... Oh, even more so. Oh my god. Even more
so. And the thing is, as far as fruit goes, I'm
not a big fruit guy, but there are certain flavors
that I do enjoy. I like cherry, I like lemonade,
things like that. And raspberry, not high on
my list, but this is really great. The raspberry
and lemon is such a fantastic... Mix. And I'm
sure, I wonder then if they added the agave for
sweetness to counterbalance. I bet they did.
The tartness. The tartness, yeah. Of the two
fruits in there. Very, very well crafted. Well
crafted. They did an excellent job on that. Well
done, Shiner. Now, here's the thing. When we
do this kind of thing, and we have a very pleasant
experience, I'm going to look at other Shiner
products now. Sure. We did try, what did we try
of theirs? recently. Didn't we try something
of theirs? I don't think it was the Bach, although
the Shiner Bach I think is their most popular
product if I'm correct. I think you're right
there. Yeah, we tried their... No, maybe we didn't.
This might be the first Shiner one we tried.
I think you're right. Mm -hmm. Yeah, and flavor
profiles. I just picked raspberry, lemony, and
sweet. Yeah, I picked those three and I added
tart. because that tartness is so crisp. Yeah.
But not overwhelming, which is impressive. Totally
agree. So good. In our untapped app, we do unlock
badges. And the badge, I unlocked. Cheers to
independent U .S. craft breweries, level 13.
Oh, hell yeah. Cheers, beer patriot. You are
supporting the small independent American craft
brewer. When you see the seal shaped like an
upside down beer bottle, that's independence.
You're tasting. Try five more to earn level 14.
Sounds like a challenge. It does sound like a
challenge. Hmm, it's a thought. It's a thought.
I also unlocked verified adventure badge level
15. While spontaneity can be fun, sometimes you
want to make sure your adventure will rock. Check
out the menu at untapped verified venue before
visiting and know exactly what's on tap. That's
75 check -ins at venue that is verified. Try
five more for level 16. Oh nice. So how about
that? free badges don't mind if i do i will take
those badges for sure ah good stuff did you get
me i did not no sadly i mean i must be in between
badges you must be yeah you don't need no stinking
badges watch next week i'm gonna get like 10
of them you'll get like 10 yeah uh so i would
recommend um You know, we're here in Northwest
Indiana, near Chicago, and we're able to get
Shiner. It is a Texas beer, so I assume there
is some macro distribution there. Sure. So chances
are, if you are listening anywhere in America,
you'll probably be able to get Shiner products.
Give it a try. Give it a try. It's just such
a refreshing summer beer. You know, I imagine
if you pull a cold one out of the fridge, you're
sitting on your deck, it's kind of warm, a little
bit of a breeze, got maybe a a bowl of pretzels
or popcorn out there and you got this beer, you're
in for a nice day. You're feeling good. You are
definitely feeling good. Highly recommend. Now,
typically we end the show with the world of weird
news, but not today. Not today, Junior. We have
a tier list. Tier listing. I know nothing about
it. Aiden has crafted this. Much like Shiner
crafted this beer. You'd think they're paying
us money, but they're not. They're not. They're
not. We're just clever. We're just fans. Yeah.
So we're clever fans. Anyway, we're ending with
a tier list. I have no idea what it's about,
but let's let's let's do this thing. Tier listing
a segment from an old podcast of mine where I
make a tier list of anything and I give it to
Mark Moe, and he used to rank them on a scale
of F being the worst of the worst, D being bad,
C being mid, B being good, A being great, and
S being the best of the best. Of the best. Of
the best. Now, we're going to be ranking American
monuments into landmarks. Oh, okay. You can rank
these however you like, whatever. There's, I
mean, I don't want to steal the no rules policy,
but there is one rule. Uh oh. I get my final
say. Oh. So I can make little tweaks if I want
to. Okay. If you say something's an A and I don't
like it, I'll make it an A minus. Oh, shit. Because
I'm brutal like that. Oh, no. So there is one
rule, and that is I'm the Judge Jereen Executioner.
Oh, shit. I'm scared now. Anyway, American monuments
and landmarks. We'll start off with maybe one
of the more popular ones, the Statue of Liberty.
Statue of Liberty. This is a good one. It's iconic.
Given to us by France. Given to us by France.
Our best friends. Thanks, France. It is a symbol
to your tired, your weak, your poor, your immigrants,
like what we used to stand for. Right. And it's
just, it's there, you know, for people that are
coming across the ocean, ships, whatever, and
you see just this symbol of hope. It's pretty
neat, iconic. Yeah. I give it a solid A. Solid
A? Through and through? Yeah. I like that. No
notes. Next up, the Grand Canyon. Grand Canyon.
It's a big, big hole in the earth. One of the
wonders of the world. That's what they say. That's
what they tell me. That's what they tell me.
I've seen it briefly. Well, twice, actually.
Once from, like, actually inside an airplane.
We fly over. It's like, oh, look at the big hole.
I don't find it as spectacular as other things.
It's kind of neat, but it's just... Oh, at the
end of the day, it's a hole. I go C. You go C?
Oh, man. OK, I'm going to add my plus. So C plus
is going to be the final score. OK. But I, because
I did enjoy being there. There's not a lot to
do there. You just look at the canyon and then
you leave. So C plus, I think, is fine. But I
was kind of amazed when I was there. and we were
at one of the lookout spots, it really felt like
I was staring at a painting or a wallpaper. Like,
it just didn't feel real. That's interesting.
Like, in person, it's so fucking huge. Yeah.
It is massive. And I really, like I was so far
away from the other side, I literally, I think
I was probably 12 or 13 when I saw it. So it
could have just been like this childlike wonder.
But it really felt like I was staring at a painting.
I'm like, that's incredible. which is the reason
I add the plus. So C plus could be the Grand
Canyon's final score. Fair enough. Next up, the
Indiana Dunes. Indiana Dunes right here in the
region. It's a lake. It's water. There's big
mounds of sand. All formed from the glaciers
of the past. Pretty amazing. It's actually actually
there's a good hiking and biking system throughout,
which is kind of neat. That's true. Which is
more like the woods and just the natural area
as opposed to the actual sand dunes themselves.
There's a Mount Baldy. So it's it's technically
called Mount Baldy. I don't think it's technically
a mountain. I don't think it has that elevation.
but it's a lot of sand and it's piled up. So
I'll give that a B minus. B minus? That's fair.
We'll go B minus on that. I think I would be
more argumentative if all the local industry
didn't pollute the fuck out of the lake and make
it essentially unswimmable. Oh yeah. Like you
dip your head in that water, you exit with an
air infection. Yep, I did. Yeah. It's just foul
how we've treated Lake Michigan. Yep. So B -
for the Indiana Dunes. Next up, Gateway Arch.
The Gateway Arch. The finest of St. Louis. The
mighty Mississippi. Ah, the old man. Deep river.
Heart lies over Jordan. Dad, I think we missed
our exit. That's OK. We got over the river. Yeah,
I've known people that have gone up in it. And
it's just kind of one of those experiences like,
ah, OK. It's kind of like a rickety elevator.
And you're going like. in an arch, you know,
diagonal up and over, so it's a little trippy,
because I've been to the top, and it's cool,
like it's, whoa, I'm high up now, I can stare
down at St. Louis, and then that's the downside,
you're staring down at St. Louis, which is like,
wow, they could have put this somewhere cooler.
Right, because St. Louis is boring. Yeah, kind
of boring. Kind of boring. Neither good nor bad,
this is... Or it's kind of a fun arch being up
there was cool, but then I looked down at this
boring city I'm like what are we doing here?
Yeah? What do you guys have the Cardinals? They're
whack. Yeah, you guys drink that water. Hey,
Jesus Has their bushes here. Oh, yeah now I get
it. Yeah See see that's good. That's fair next
up Mount Rushmore now if you examine the history
of how how all of that went down and the politics
behind it. It's kind of a shitty deal. It was
the Six Grandfathers, I believe. Mm -hmm. Was
the original monument. Was the original monument.
Now, granted, there's a whole story there. So,
you know, do rich white douchebags play a role
in everything, of course. But their people kind
of sold their people out, too. So you have some
of that. So it's like... Take the good, you take
the bad, right? That's been kind of the theme
of the show. So I'm going to grade it as just
what it is, which is kind of a neat thing to
see. And we did see it. Saw it at night. All
lit up. all lit up, which was really super cool.
And like when you park there, you have to take
this long path to kind of get back to it. And
there's all these different state flags and everything
that are all kind of down this long walkway.
And like there's this arena where you can sit.
So I don't know if like they do things or have
fireworks or whatever they do sometime, but there
is like a little amphitheater thing where you
can kind of sit. It's kind of fun. And a place
where you can walk into that talks about kind
of how it was made. I do find it fascinating.
I think if they try to put Trump's face on it,
I think I'll never go there again. Yeah. But
I find it fascinating. I would probably give
it a solid B. Solid B? B for Mount Rushmore.
Next up, Alcatraz Island. Yeah, what a neat thing.
I've been to San Francisco before. We talked
about going out there. I think the seas were
a little rough that day, so they didn't run whatever
ship out there and my parents didn't want to
go or something, so we just ended up not doing
it. Probably your papa, because he didn't like
heights and he didn't like being on the rough
water, so I just think that was... That's fair,
honestly. That's fair, yeah. Totally fair assessment.
I get that. Yeah, why do you want to go out there
and be like, blah, work, yeah, wow, prison. My
favorite. My favorite, yeah. So I kind of get
that. but still something incredibly fascinating
to see, just that you'd have this area of the
country that is so unique and beautiful, and
it's topography and geography and everything,
and be like, hey, Jimmy, yeah, you think we can
throw a jail out there? Make it maximum security,
too. Throw real bad people out there. And if
they're like, hey, I got away, they got a swimming
and a shark eats them. Oh, that's a great idea!
Hey, that's a good idea. Let me call up my contractor
buddies right now. Let's go. I got something
to build. Um... Gap. Oh man, where would it rank
though? Yeah. That's the question. Because it's
not... C+. C +, that's fair. That's fair. Next
up, local once again, Cloudgate. Or as we happen
to call it, The Bean. I love Chicago. I love
every part of it. I think it's the best American
city in the summertime. It's kind of brutal in
the wintertime. As as American cities go, if
we were to do someday a tier listing of American
cities, I think Chicago gets an S. We'll do that
another time, though. The thing about Cloud Gate,
though, is it's just kind of dumb looking. Really
is just it's kind of it's kind of like who dropped
the big shiny jelly bean in the middle of this
park Dude, I love art. I love the Art Institute
moneys mayonnaise Rembrandt's I love all that
shit even some modern stuff like Warhol and all
that It's you have great museums in Chicago's
van Gogh. Oh my god. Love him But then you got
a bean and it's like No, it's Skygate. You're
supposed to be able to see the skyline. Well,
I can see the skyline. I can just look at it.
I don't need to look at a big shiny bean and
be like, oh, there it is. Well, yeah, just turn
around. I think it's the fascination, because
I do get this. I think it's the fascination with
curved mirror surfaces where, like, if you've
ever seen a concave mirror and how trippy that
looks or, like, the bean, which is a convex mirror
of sorts, it is kind of fascinating. Yeah, I
agree. You can also go to a funhouse. I'm just
gonna, oh man. And see I can't, I can't, I can't
grade it what I graded the arch because it's
St. Louis. This is true. C plus? C plus for Cloudgate.
Cloudgate plus. That's fair. No notes there.
Next up, Niagara Falls. Been there. It is really
cool. I learned a lot about it when I was there.
Is the American side better or the Canadian side?
Because I know you can visit both. I've heard
the Canadian side is better. That is the side
I was on. Oh, OK. I was not on the American side.
But it's really an amazing thing to see. They
harness so much power from that thing, which
is kind of cool, too. And it actually retreats,
apparently, a little bit every year through erosion.
Yeah. So that was kind of a cool fact, too. I
liked it a lot. I go B+. B +, solid. The Golden
Gate Bridge. To be fair, I'm not a height guy.
Oh, you and me both. Going over like a big tall
bridge makes parts of me tingle. And that's not
always like a good tingle. Sure. So I don't always
like that. But as far as its construction and
how it looks... Awesome. Is it the world's or
the country's largest suspension bridge? I don't
think world. Probably the country's. Yeah. And
it could end up being the Sunshine Bridge, too.
I'm not 100%. We'll have to do some off -air
research on that. But I think it's beautiful.
I like actually coming in from the city, going
back out over the Golden Gate Bridge, because
you see this area called Sausalito, which is
just an amazing, once again, geography and topography.
It's just so cool because it's like this mountainside
town. that looks like a bunch of steps and these
homes like make the steps and it just goes up
and up and up and it's just really a neat thing
to see. Yeah. I give it an A. I like it. A? That's
awesome. Might have been S tier but I don't like
I's. I'll move it to an A plus. I'll move my
judge hand. I'll give it an A plus because I
love the engineering behind. Oh it's phenomenal.
Massive bridges. It's crazy. Next up Yellowstone
National Park. Now. I'm not going to try to take
the view of it from the fact it's going to end
up being the demise of most American citizens
once that volcano explodes. That's not going
to happen. Come on. We're all going to die. Well,
that's true. Well, that's a true statement. This
is true. We're all going to die. Just a little
sooner once that thing blows its top. Yep. This
is like, well... We got about 15 minutes. What
do you want to do? What do you want to do? Let's
go get a beef sandwich. And some beer. And other
things. Yeah. Gorgeous. I love that part of the
country. Kind of the Wyoming, Colorado, Montana,
Idaho. It's just phenomenally beautiful. Is it
S tier? It's S tier. S for Yellowstone. Yeah.
I like that. Now these final 10, because this
is a list of 20, these final 10. Rapid Fire.
Okay. An old segment of ours. Yeah. Which we
can include into your listing. Rapid Fire, Final
Ten, the Sears Tower. Amazing structure, I'm
glad you still called it the Sears Tower, A+.
A +, I like that. The Empire State Building.
Once again, iconic structure, the beginning of
what skyscrapers are and were. A. A, I like that.
Solid. The Alamo. The Alamo I've heard much smaller
and less impressive in person. I've heard historically
significant Be be solid the great smoky mountains.
We've been there pretty neat bears Be be solid
I like that the Seattle Space Needle Kind of
cool. We saw that from our rooftop of our hotel.
This is true right there. So super cool beautiful
Yeah, I'm so cool. See how's great city. I can't
wait to go back I do like the space needle architecturally
very neat a a solid I like it Yosemite Yosemite
same thing as Yellowstone, although I don't know
if I would grade it s -tier. We'll go a plus
a plus That's how I can get behind that the 9
-eleven memorial site Nice tribute to an incredibly
shitty day and shitty period in our history.
I don't know, depressing though. B. B? Solid.
The Hoover Dam. Amazing. What a feat of engineering.
Right, that we could do that. Just absolutely
amazing. And sadly, just due to water issues
in the West, probably will just be a thing to
see and not needed for water distribution. This
used to hold back water. It used to hold back
a lot of water, so that wouldn't flood. Your
grandparents used to be able to drink this thing
called fresh water. I don't see water on either
side. Well, this is decoration now. Yeah. Let's
go S tier. S tier? I like that. The final two,
penultimate one, the Liberty Bell. Liberty, it's
got a crack in it. This is true. It's got a crack
in it. Did they bring it? Come on, Philly, you
gotta do a better job taking care of your bells.
Take care of that bell, man. Liberty Bell, a
lot of significance. I don't think it's significant
in like actually really like what it is or the
fact it got a crack in it. Yeah. But still cool.
And a great symbol. I'm going to go A - because
it's in Philadelphia. The final one of the day.
Pearl Harbor National Memorial. That is something
that more than the 9 -Eleven is just really significant
and was such a turning point in this country's
history. What a turning point. It's just unbelievable.
And still very, very sad. But it lit a fire under
this nation that sadly needed to be lit. Oh,
S -tier. S -tier? Going S -tier. Beautiful. This
completes our list. Let us know in the comments.
or on socials, what you think of this list, what
you would change. Memorial S. There we go. You're
welcome. You're welcome. Happy birthday, America
250. This is the end of the show and end of season
six. We'll more than likely be taking a little
bit of a break as we often do in between seasons,
which kind of runs right into the holiday weekend,
which is kind of perfect. So we may actually
we're going to have some things. We're going
to have an interview. with Kate Novak, she's
an automotive detailer here in town. We had an
amazing one hour conversation. So we'll get that
up and going. We'll have some gaming content.
And then after the holiday, we'll be back for
season seven. uh more chaos and tomfoolery and
shenanigans the ol siet day you got it so make
sure you like subscribe and share all of our
stuff as well aiden spelled the right way that's
his gaming site on youtube and then of course
our uh collab which is a &m gaming and uh check
that out we're gonna have some new gaming content
here for you soon and uh that's about all i got
thank you so much for listening six seasons in
hopefully a lot more to come Damn right, don't
explode your hand off with fireworks because
there is no healthcare here. That's right.