Join Master of Menacery Mark Maloney and the
OG Guy Being Dude Aidan Maloney as they explore
movies, music, food, and nightlife on the Mark
Mo Show. With segments like You Just Made the
List, Carpe DMs, and The 15, each episode is
loaded with shenanigans, tomfoolery, and chaos.
We hope you enjoy the show. Hey there everybody,
what's going on? Welcome to Season 1. Episode
10 of the Mark Mo Show. My name is Mark Maloney,
and I am your host for this podcast, along with
AK219's very own Aidan Maloney, my son, co -host,
producer of this show, host and producer of many
other shows. Dudes Talented, what's up? My man,
buenos dias. It's good to be here. Buenos tardes.
Buenos, buenos, lots of buenos. I don't know
how to say morning in Spanish. I just go with
the Buenos Dias. Buenos Dias, good day. Good
day. Because that's like any part of the day.
It'll fit. Like, Buenos Tardes, that works in
the afternoon. I just know suavos means eggs
and that's what I want. Suavos? Huevos. Huevos.
Huevos is eggs. Affordable huevos. Affordable
huevos. Never seen it. Yeah. Never seen it these
days. No, no. I mean, to be fair, I mean, if
I'm a chicken... I'm like, oh, you want this
egg? All right. What are you going to do for
it? I'm putting a tariff on this egg. I've been
communicating with fellow bird friend the penguin,
and we're banding together as a bird culture
just to fuck with you guys. Imagine, humans go
extinct in a couple hundred years, and the next
big being is the bird. Is the bird. Yeah. Like
literally a penguin is in an attorney's office.
Exactly. Yeah. What's up, chicken? No. No, I
told you not to cross the road. I mean, I think
that's what we're looking at. The heron that
was driving can't be at fault. It can't be at
fault. What's faster, the tortoise or the hare?
Really? He got you with that? You idiot. You
bird brain. Yeah, so that's the future. That's
the future. Sorry, I didn't mean to kill you
this early. No, it's all good. This early in
the show. I keep thinking about like, oh, what
if us saying, like, what if birds become sentient
before we go extinct? And all of a sudden there's
audio recordings of me saying bird brain. And
that's like the next big slur is like you can't
say bird brain. And then all the birds are canceling
you. Exactly. It's like. Fuck this guy. And then
birds are just going ham on human beings. I thought
it would have been apes. The movie said apes.
Wasn't there a big emu war in Australia? Wasn't
that a thing? Was that a thing? I think it was,
like the Great Emu War. I'm going to do some
live research. Fellow Aussies, if you are listening
to this podcast, feel free to hit us up on our
socials and let us know about the Great Emu War.
Yeah. The Great Emu War was a nuisance wildlife
management military operation undertaken in Australia
over the latter part of 1932 to address public
concern over the number of emus, a large flightness
bird indigenous to Australia. That is a real
thing. The Emu Wars did happen. Wow. So that's
really, that's foreshadowing. It's what's coming.
We're going to have Emu World 2. Yeah. Oh yeah.
When animals start sprouting opposable thumbs
and they can, like, I'm out. Yeah. I'm like,
OK, I see what's happening here. I've seen enough.
They've seen enough, clearly. I don't blame them.
Yeah. Well, hi, we're back. Hello. We tend to
go off. Well, if you're a regular listener, you
know we go off the highway. Find ourselves in
the Badlands and just tell you about it. Yeah,
that's what we do. Sometimes we get back on the
highway. Sometimes we don't. We don't have to.
No, we really don't. Yeah, we're one of those
dune buggies. We're fit. That's right. We're
agile. We are agile. We can improvise. We're
capable. Capable. I like that. Yes, very capable.
Well, all I have to say is we produce great content
like this weekly on all podcast platforms and
YouTube. We'll also have some one -off interviews
coming your way. We're going to have one next
week, which is great because... Aiden and I are
going to be busy doing other stuff next weekend,
so we're going to have this great interview lined
up. Keep an eye on socials for who that interview
is going to be with. this amazing person. She's
a complete rock star. Friend of the show. Friend
of the show. Can't wait to chat with her. That's
going to be amazing. And you know what? If you
like the Mark Mo Show, whether it's the interviews,
whether it's our, you know, the regular podcast,
whatever it is, check out my radio show, After
Hours. It's on wvlp .org. That's where it streams
at. Your tune in app on your handheld device.
If you are local, we are here in northwest Indiana.
And most of the people in the world are going
to be like, where the hell is that? Well, Chicago,
just not quite. Not quite there. Chicago. Yeah.
We aspire to be as awesome as Chicago. Yeah.
It's like we're far enough away where we're not
in corn, the land of corn. The land of corn.
Also known as the Midwest. But we're close enough
that we get the taste, you know? Yes. Like, you
could drive 20 minutes and find a Lou Malnati's.
You can. Luminati's, Giordano's, oh! Hey! But
you could also drive 20 minutes in the other
way and find some meth houses and corn. And more
corn. Yeah. And a lot of corn. Soy and corn.
You get the best of both worlds. You really do.
I don't know if that's really the best of anything
the other way. But, you know, that's just me.
That's just me. Personal opinions, hey? Personal
opinion. Well, hey, there's a microphone here.
What are we going to do? Yeah, right. Two white
dudes with a microphone. What are you going to
get? Oh, opinions. Opinions. You were definitely
going to get opinions. My man. Maybe not as many
as the boomers. Oh, foreshadowing. Anyway. Whoa.
Oh, hey, yo. We love our older listeners, so
just realize this is entertainment. For entertainment
purposes only. Uh -huh. the uh the effects and
views of this show do not reflect blah blah blah
legal jargon back when they had the minrow doctrine
and every news program had to tell you before
they started spouting opinion this does not reflect
the blah blah blah and they would say and then
they would do their piece so you would know oh
this is the bullshit part of the news and you
just go on your way until like sports and weather
came on yeah it was fine Now all of the news
is that way. Yeah. And there's no more Monroe
doctrines. I'm sorry. You must have meant to
say news entertainment. News entertainment. Yes.
That's exactly what it is. Yeah. Because it's
like you just watch it and you're just like,
I'm not sure any of this happened. This is sloth.
Did any of this happen? Yeah. I don't even know.
No. Is that really the orange asshole? It could
be. It might not be. I don't know. Oh, boy. But
anyway, that after hour show we were talking
about. Two hours of uninterrupted Celtic punk
and alt rock every Tuesday night 9 p .m. Central
Standard Time Friday 4 p .m. Central Standard
Time You can also check out the guys being dudes
aka 219 podcast with Aidan Maloney and a guest
host Occasionally on occasionally on you know
Once again, I'm alright. I'm in a mood. I'm in
a mood I'm in a mood and this this is our podcast
so we're gonna roll All I have to say is that
when you have the capability to punch in at work,
on time, I'm guessing. Certainly. Leave, maybe
a little overtime, maybe sneak in a couple of
$2, $3 extra. Must be nice. Go, I don't know,
play a sport, religiously. Right. Never miss
it. Little recreation, you know. and then decide
not to show up for said podcast. But not just
like once in a blue moon. Not just like once
every four or five weeks. We're like, what, three
weeks running now? Four weeks missed. Mm. Yeah.
Yeah. Now, I would hit up Craigslist. I would
put an ad in Craigslist, because that's reputable.
I would put an ad in Craigslist and just be like,
hey, looking for a host. Looking for new short
white dude. Really? There's a few of them around.
I'm not sure how reputable most of them are,
but it's a thing. But I will say, just throw
that on the Craigslist. you know, maybe back
pages, whatever works for you. Right. Just throw
it out there and just be like, hey, look for
a host. I'm looking for someone that can breathe.
Right. I'm looking for someone that knows what
two plus two is. Yeah. Just basic stuff. Sure.
I think that's really all you need. The bare
minimum. Yeah. I think you could get by. It's
an idea. You might want to do that. Just floating
that out there. Planting that seed, that thought
seed. Thought seed. It is planted. It is planted.
Now, AK219 has quite the back catalog, so you
can hit it up. There's amazing content on there.
And your, I guess, if you want to call it podcast
or just an entertainment, your YouTube. The channel.
Aidan Maloney, spell the correct way. Aidan spelled
the right way. Aidan spelled the right way. Yes.
Right or correct, either way. As long as you
spell it. Spell properly. Yeah, exactly. That's
it. If not, get the hell out of here. Yeah. If
you didn't find it, you didn't spell it right.
You're going to meet the bouncer. Yeah. He's
going to throw you out of the bar. That's a roadhouse.
Roadhouse. Yeah, you're out. You're done. Yeah.
Aiden spelled the right way. That's where you
find it. Lots of more current content. Very true.
A lot of gaming content, things like that. I
don't know. Talk to people. Talk to the people.
Tell them. See the microphone right in there.
I see the microphone. All those. Dozens of people.
They're all in there. It's hundreds and thousands.
For the hundreds and hundreds of people somewhere.
Mostly in the Philippines. Shout out Philippines.
You guys rule. Shout out Philippines. Shout out
Canada. That's right. By the way, Jolly B is
Jolly Good. Yeah? Yeah. What does that mean?
That is... I don't know. No, it is a restaurant.
based out of the Philippines. And so, their menu,
they have some Filipino food like, oh god, it
just left my head. But more stuff that you'll
find on the island. But they also do fried chicken.
They must have a lot of frickin' chickens there.
They do this fried chicken, and the fried chicken's
excellent. That sounds pretty righteous. It is
very good. There are a couple of Jollibee's in
Chicago, so if you can find one, get that chicken,
because that chicken is righteous. Not sponsored,
but you get the nod. You get the nod. They might
have to be, since the Philippines are showing
us some love. That's true. It all connects. It
all connects. Wouldn't that be perfect? It would
be perfect. Jollibee, cut us a check. Yeah, no
doubt. Yeah. I mean, we're two Irish -American
loves. Where the hell's Ireland at? Yeah, where
they been? Where they been? UK's showing us love.
Can we get sponsored by potatoes? That's what
I'm saying. Potato. Potato. That's a chip. That's
a Conan O 'Brien reference. It is a Conan O 'Brien
reference. Praise be Conan O 'Brien. My man.
Definitely one of the - One of the legends in
showbiz. One of the legends. I think one of the
people that I get - Least controversial. Not
controversial. The dude is just funny. He's a
G. He's just a funny dude and does it in such
a way where, I mean, he doesn't have to push
the envelope in terms of like, like swearing
or saying controversial stuff. The dude's just
funny off, off, off the cuff. Right, right. And
that takes a lot of talent. And the people he
has on as guests, he always finds a way to elevate
them to their highest potential. Absolutely.
And that's such a remarkable skill. It's a remarkable
skill, I think. I think he elevated Bill Burr.
I think he elevated Nikki Glaser. There's so
many great comedians that he gives the floor
to them. And then with the way he communicates,
like you said, just kind of builds them up and
lets them do their thing. He sets a perfect alley
-oop. He does he does he's the assist man. Yeah,
absolutely assist man He's just these he's a
really great host and as I said if I had to come
up with a list of of comedians Show hosts things
like that that I put up there that are an influence
to me. He's definitely Oh for sure. I would agree
with you. Do you definitely be in the top ten?
Top ten or top five. Yeah. For sure. And we do,
we do top tens on this show. We do. Interesting.
Interesting. Perhaps in a future episode. Future
episode, we might have to, our top ten influences.
Yes. To get back onto the highway though. Oh
yeah, what are we doing? My show. Good night
everybody. Aidan spelled the right way. Oh that's
right, we're not, oh it's not, oh we didn't do
the show yet, oh shit. We didn't even do the
thing yet. The thing, oh the thing, before the
thing. We just got off the highway. We did, we
did. Again, we didn't get back on. Where are
we at? My show. Your show. Aidan, Spell the Right
Way. Let's go. On YouTube, I do fun gaming content,
indie horror, silly games, bridge building games.
The bridge building's fun. Sometimes I make a
fool out of myself, and I'm fine with that because,
you know, as someone that's into entertainment
and being an entertainer, you got to learn to
just take the L's, you know? You do. You got
to learn to take the L's and make them funny.
That's what you have to do. I feel like I've
become pretty good at that. So check out my show.
That's it. I do watch the gaming content and
the bridge building. I get so involved in because
I'll sit there like you and I are sitting in
the same room. Oh yeah. And you'll be like doing
stuff and like, oh, don't put that. No, don't
do that. Don't do that. It's nonsensical. It
is. And then I'm just sitting there the whole
time, shaking my head after one wrong move. I'm
like, nah, it's going to fall. It's going to
fall. And then it falls. And I'm just like, see?
Why weren't you listening? Oh, because I'm in
my house. That's why you weren't listening. That's
how you know it's a good show, is if people are
that entwined in watching it. Absolutely. And
that I'm happy about. Yeah, it's great stuff,
dude. It's awesome, I love it. Now, okay, so
if you remember last week's episode, we kicked
everything off by talking about impending doom.
Now, I guess it's not much different this week
because we're talking about impending doom. Right.
But is it impending still? No, we're in the middle
of doom. We're right between the two O's. We
are in the middle of doom. And I mean, holy shit,
unless you've been living under a rock, shit's
going sideways. And it's very easy to blame the
orange asshole of the White House. And trust
me, he deserves most of it, like 99 .3%. Sure.
But let's be honest, he didn't get there by himself.
There's a group of folks that deserve as much
blame. People that helped put him there, people
that currently prop him up. And so, they're typically
more religious than, say, younger Americans.
They're already at that Medicare, Medicaid, Social
Security age. Their eyes and knees are failing.
Well, so are mine, but that's a different story.
That's a different story for a different day.
They tend to be a bit forgetful. Jesus Christ,
it's me. I'm not one of them. Of course, I'm
speaking about the boomer. Ah, quite. The boomer.
The gray -haired, overly opinionated boomer.
They think everyone is overly sensitive, yet
they're the ones that gave the birth to Karen
and Kevin. They always disapprove of your career
and they all think they're Warren Buffett. They
get irritated if you're on your phone in their
presence. God forbid. And hey, if you go to therapy,
you're just weak. Great service in establishment?
Meager tip. Poor service. They are gonna write
a thesis on why you suck on Yelp. You'll find
most of them at some sort of religious ceremony
on Sundays. One place you won't find them is
one of those do -it -yourself checkout lines
at the grocery store. Oh, yeah, they are allergic
to that shit They do not have much care about
the future of the future generations It makes
me want to steal their social security checks.
I'm not gonna lie Thought about it a time or
two felony might just do it anyway. I Mean we
got a felon as president right so must be okay
They forever preach about hard work and how things
were tougher for them. And if life is tough for
you, clearly you just didn't work hard enough.
True. Last but certainly not least, more than
half of them voted for the guy. that is responsible
for all of this current global chaos and the
past several months and all the tariffs and the
last two days on the market that have just gone
into the shitter. Aidan Jesus, talk to me, please.
Yeah, I want to preface what I'm about to say
by saying I am not ageist. I do not take prejudice
on people with a certain age. or who look a certain
age, that doesn't matter to me. And it's easy
to group people into generations as we do, but
not every boomer is this way. So if you feel
wrongly persecuted by what host Mark Mo said
or what I'm about to say, then you're not a part
of the group. It's not directed to you. It's
not directed to you, but there is a loud majority
of boomers who this does apply to. Absolutely.
It's not Bernie. No. It's not Elizabeth Warren.
You know, there's a lot of, it's not Robert De
Niro, there's a lot of fine boomers out there.
Yes. But I want to say first and foremost to
that loud majority of you, you are entitled,
rude, religious zealots who have no right to
believe that you worked any harder than the success
in generations. And I'm about to explain to you
why that is. Oh, go. Because you had the easiest
childhood, young adulthood, adulthood of any
generation in the modern era of humanity. Yep.
The marginal tax rates when you were growing
up, the 1940s, 50s, early 60s, the richest Americans
fell into the tax bracket where they were taxed
90%. 90%. And the poorest half of Americans were
taxed closer to 20. Now, these days, the richest
Americans are taxed below 40%. And the poorest
Americans are still taxed above 10%. So you got
to live in a world with the most highly funded
social programs, because of these taxes, the
best infrastructure, the largest growing economy,
you had it easy. And you have the audacity to
believe the current generation has it that way.
Now how about income inequality? In the 60s,
the average one percenter, so you're talking
the richest three million Americans. or about
$4 million, let's say, made about $400 ,000,
while the poorest Americans made somewhere between
$20 ,000 to $30 ,000. These days, this statistic
goes up to about 2010, that 1 % has gone up over
$1 .4 million. Of course. While the poorest wage
stays the same. The same. the absolute same has
not gone up even the slightest. Here's why. And
here is exactly how this connects to what I said
in the beginning, because productivity and worker
compensation had a little split in the 1970s,
thanks to two dipshits, oh I'm sorry, presidents,
by the names of Nixon and Reagan. Oh Lord. So
between 1948, you're talking post -war booming
economy, 1948 to 1973, productivity in this country
rose 96%. Hourly compensation rose 91%. From
1973 to the early 2010s, productivity up 72%.
Hourly compensation? Nine percent. Oh God. You
got paid for the work you did, boomers. We're
not. Nope. Gen Z isn't. Millennials weren't and
aren't. Yeah. Gen X weren't and aren't. And you
want to talk inflation too, because I haven't
touched inflation quite yet. Let's talk price
changes. Just over the last two and a half decades.
Right? Hospital services. Up 200 percent. This
is all adjusted for inflation. So you're talking
inflation plus over 200%. College tuition over
160%. You're talking housing 80 % plus 80 % on
top of inflation. New cars plus 10 % on top of
inflation. You got the cheapest cars, the cheapest
housing, the cheapest education. on top of the
social services, on top of the high wages, and
you have the audacity to claim the opposite.
Minimum wage in the 1960s, adjusted for inflation,
about $13 an hour, with those reduced prices.
Minimum wage today is still the same as it was
in 2009, $7 .25. That's you can double that Seven
dollars and a quarter and you'd still be making
a poverty wage. Yeah still on top of that To
loop it fully back around to what you were saying
how This dogshit rapist orange piece of shit
got into office. Yeah, not once but twice twice
Let's look at some let's look at some liens some
left right liens. Okay, baby boomers 31 % full
right lean. Yep. 17 % left lean. The remaining
percentage is either moderate or independent.
Millennials, 27 % left lean. 17 % right lean.
Yep. The rest being moderate or independent.
You wanna know how we got there? That's how.
Yep. But you guys are already on Social Security.
You got the bag they got they got the bag. They
got fucking the rest of us Yeah, I'm never gonna
be able to retire. No because Social Security
is gonna be dead. Yep. My 401k is thrashed. Yeah,
I Will work till I die That's the way that's
the way you chose got to return like retire in
your 60s Yeah, you got the bag and said fuck
the rest and they were the ones once again and
I know and we didn't really discuss this but
The boomers are the ones that bought their homes
in the 1970s and the 1980s. They have that beautiful
brick ranch on the corner. We're here in Valparaiso,
Indiana, so we'll use that as an example. They
bought that say in 1980, and they probably paid
in the neighborhood of maybe 70 or $80 ,000 for
it. Right. And when they sell it, they're going
to sell it for about a half a million. If not
more. If not more. Yeah. So once again, they
got the bag Yeah, and if they wait till a certain
age you get to take a certain payment without
the tax I forget what tax that is or or how that
works I know some people have done it, but that'll
be just straight -up cash for them Yeah, in addition
to retirement and the Social Security like you
said which are already getting and and so they're
they're gonna be good They're gonna be fine.
It's the rest of us who can't afford these five,
$600 ,000 homes that are gonna look at things
when we're 60, 60, 570 and like, oh shit, okay,
well, I guess I'll just keep working. Right,
yeah. Floating off with the life raft while the
rest of us are drowning. Oh yeah. And you still
have the audacity to look back and laugh. Yep.
Is the craziest part to me. It is crazy. And
that's, like I said, that's not every boomer.
That's not every boomer. And there are some,
there's a handful that are even friends of friends
of mine. Oh, yeah, no doubt. Family friends even.
And they get it. They understand. They're even
in the same mindset of, oh, well, I'm not one
of those boomers. And I know. I hear you. Trust
me, I hear you. But it's insane that the loud
majority is exactly like that. Right. I mean,
it is. And it's kind of disappointing. And I
feel like I feel like they just didn't learn
enough from the greatest generation, which were
their moms and dads, which they should have learned
some shit because if anybody went through shit,
it was that generation. And they were the ones
that built this country that the boomers thrived
off of, set it up for them on a golden platter.
Right. to which they turned around and said,
ah, screw the rest of them. Right. Yeah, this
is, this is... And this, also one thing we haven't
touched on, is this is mainly directed towards
white American boomers. Correct. Correct. Because
black American boomers were dealing with the
civil rights crisis. They're in the same boat
with the rest of us. They're in the same boat,
if not a worse one. Probably. If not a worse
one. Yep. That's that's a point. We haven't even
touched on and I already that could be that could
be a different show Entirely whole that I was
just about to say I feel like I've talked too
much, but that's an in that's an entirely Fantastic
point we haven't hit yet. Yeah, but we can yeah,
we can always come back to that but that's just
kind of the whole point behind it is is You know
as you say not not everybody in that age bracket
fits into what we're saying here, but a lot of
them do and Just as a perfect example of how
fucked up things are, and we already talked about
Trump, and everything he's doing. Look at Congress,
the Congress that's allowing him to do it. It's
mostly boomers in Congress. Right. So when you
say, oh my god, this government, they don't do
anything, and blah, blah, I'm like, well look
at the Supreme Court, look at Congress, look
at, it's a bunch of old people. Right. And it's
like, You know, the last few presidents have
been so old and I think, man, I remember my dad
when he was 70 and 75. No, wait, hell, he's being
president. What the hell? Right. What are we
doing? And once again, it's not that they're
not capable of thought or they're not capable
of doing things. This is supposed to be one of
the most stressful jobs in the world. Right.
That's my point. I mean, shit, I'm 50 and I can't
I look at that job like, holy shit, man, I'd
be dozing off in the middle of the day. I wouldn't
be able to sleep at night. And so that's a big
part of it, is that I think a lot of these people,
thank you for your service. You know go go watch
matlock go away go go go eat it at a breakfast
buffet somewhere You know go to go to the really
cheap ones in Vegas right with your friends Go
play some fucking bingo in Keno or whatever the
hell it is that you guys play You know if you
have the audacity to set a minimum age for certain
government jobs There should be a maximum age
which is a retirement age Yep, if there's a minimum
there should be a maximum. I absolutely agree.
Yep No doubt about that. And I don't know what
that age is. I'm gonna say, how about the age
where you can get social security? Right. Yeah,
once you're eligible, go retire, go sit on a
beach. Okay? No more insider trading. Nope. No
more fucking future generations. Go away. Yeah.
Sell that $600 ,000 house and go sit in a cabin
somewhere or in a condo. or eating soft white
rice in a fucking retirement community or whatever
the fuck it is that you're gonna do. All I'm
saying is you're fucking up my vibe, man, and
you need to stop, and I'm just as critical of
my own generation, and I feel like Gen X should
have grabbed hold of this fucking situation by
now, but here's the thing, and it may be up.
Well, it's not going to be up to Millennials
because they're worse than we are. It's probably
going to be up to Gen Z at some point. But like
with the Gen Xers and once again, these some
of this stuff, some is generalization and we
get that. Certainly. But like a large portion
of the Gen Xers and I know some and some are
very successful and all that kind of stuff. But
we're kind of the just we don't give a shit.
Right, we have checked the fuck out as as a generation.
Yeah, we are generation check the fuck out. That's
what we've done You know, we're just kind of
in the bathroom. We're like, yep. Oh, yeah, that's
us washing our hands of all of this Yeah, we
just don't we just want to keep working Hoping
that there's a little couple of breadcrumbs at
the end of this fucking road when we get there,
right? Which there probably won't be but so then
that leaves Millennials and Gen Z years and Millennials
are almost as bad as a jet Xers are And with
them, they're just like, we care about us. That's
like the millennials are just like, so like we
care about us and our shit. I don't care about
all you guys. This is like they've they're much
more like that. And then Gen Zers, I think, in
my opinion, you can correct me if I'm wrong.
They look at this whole thing like like the big
picture. And they're like, man, this is this
is messed up. Right. This is really messed up.
What are we going to do about this? And they
look at it as a broad picture, a broad stroke,
whereas millennials are kind of more themselves,
and Gen Xers have checked out. I would agree
with that for the most part. I feel like the
issue with Gen Z, being a part of it myself,
the issue with Gen Z is that there is a small
percentage, I want to say maybe a tenth, that
are, that chronically online, you know, incel,
hyper right wing, Andrew Tate, cock sucking losers.
Right. That I mean that is a part of Gen Z sure,
you know If we're talking generalization that
has to be a part of it where I want to say the
majority of Gen Z is You know woke to the bullshit
that's really going on But there's still that
small sliver. And of course, there's always gonna
be a small sliver that ruins it for the rest
of us. Oh sure that Once again, that tiny percentage
is really loud and annoying and sets a bad precedent
for generations like Gen Alpha who are also growing
up permanently online. iPad kids. The iPad kid
generation, I've heard it called. That's alarming.
Because you know who owns all the apps? You know
who owns all of social media? The billionaire
cucks that are all hyper right wing. Yeah. That
are all fueling the shit happening today. Yeah.
Oh yeah. 100%. So I don't know what type of power
that 90 % of Gen Z has. because I don't have
high hopes for Gen A. I don't. No, it looks bad.
You know, it's funny, you started getting into
your, just kind of your description of Gen Alpha,
and a movie immediately popped into my head,
and Wally, meh, Wally. Oh, yeah. So there's that
little, and look, I'm a movie guy, I'm a movie
critic. Wally can bite ass. I don't like Wally.
And it's not an anti -animation. I'm an animation
guy. I love animated film. I can't stand that
damn film. But it does make a really good point.
So it's not complete horse shit. It does make
a good point, especially at the end. It's a good
message. Right, exactly where humans have become
useless. They're just in these chairs and all
they do is eat and shit. Right and that's it
and and like they just they require technology
to kind of keep them alive With like screens
in their face all the time and and like you look
at that and it's animated So you don't really
think about it, but then at the end you're like
damn All right, right. Yeah, that's what that
could be real even that picture of that useless
human society in Wally of You know humans eating
shitting whatever else being floated around on
these chairs. That's still in my opinion, that's
still a utopia compared to what I see as the
future of private equity firms buying up, eating
everything, destroying the last semblance of
working class rights that we have, union rights,
etc. The future of the working class is so much
more dire than even Wally looks in the end. Yep,
I agree with that. And that's the disturbing
part. That is a disturbing part. And I know we
could go on to engines here and we're going to
keep going with our show. But you had mentioned
private equity companies. I look at companies
like Joanne Fabrics and Hooters and companies
like these have been bought up by those companies
that throw all their bad debt on it and then
wait for them to fail and then claim bankruptcy.
Right. They just keep doing that shit, and it's
it's unbelievable. It's just like oh man. I didn't
know Hooters was doing that bad They weren't
doing that bad They just saddled them with a
lot of bad. That's what they do with Joanne Fabric
Joanne Fabric was around forever. We do we sell
cloth In the yarn right there, but they've done
it forever, and they've been fine. Yeah until
Private equity yeah, and in a weird way GameStop
is the only one that keeps flipping them off
like right now We're gonna make it in spite of
you. Yeah And I almost love them for that. In
a way, I agree. In a way. Oh yeah, for sure.
Like I would buy all the GameStop stock. I really
would. To the moon! Yeah, right, right. Anyway,
I think we killed the boomers, so I don't think
there's any left. Oh, no. Oh, no. Anyway. We
did. Verbally, a verbal assault. Yeah, I mean,
but you get our point. And if you kind of fit
into the descriptors that we gave, then it's
directed to you. Yes. Take a moment of introspection.
Look in a mirror. Reflect on why. It's not even
a text. We're literally describing, bringing
you points of fact, documented points of fact.
And if you feel targeted by that, Take a moment
to reflect as to why yeah, if you feel wronged
that we're bringing up facts about you Maybe
you're part of the problem. Yeah, then this was
towards you, right? Yeah But Bernie not you my
man my man Bernie. You're good De Niro. You're
a G You know, there's there's a lot of other
good older people out there that kind of get
it I wish more would but at any rate, that's
just kind of where we're at And with everything
that's happening, as I've said, it's very easy
to blame it on one guy and we often do, but he's
there because of a lot of other people his age.
Right. And that's the point. True. Alright, well,
how about that for an opener? True. That opening
dialogue got me a little riled up. it did it
did i got i got fired up i'm wide awake now i
think i need to calm down a little something
something irish up i think is what it is get
your irish up yeah for sure we're gonna have
to maybe uh get some indica i mean no we can't
do that we're we're in indiana no we just have
to go to a different state and give them our
tax dollars right we're surrounded by states
that are like yeah we're good with that yeah
indiana we're making money indianistan no no
no that's that's fine Long pause every time every
every once in a while. I need a long pause But
we are gonna take a quick break and we come back
a little carpe diem for your enjoyment All right,
we are back everybody from that stellar insane
opening of Episode 10 of the Mark Mo Show. And
we are now on to Carpe Diem. That's right, you
beautiful folks, even the older ones, send us
your DMs and we read them on the show. And if
you have a question, we might answer it. We might
not. We might. We might. Right. We say that because
legally speaking, we're not obliged to. That
is correct. The whole thing about like the views
and blah, blah, blah. This show don't reflect.
it's the same thing same deal same thing just
legal jargon don't worry about it but do send
us your social security card the physical card
the physical card to our p .o. box and we'll
send you back a photocopy for your convenience
yes and if you send us your actual social security
payments my man that's it that's all i got that's
all just send them send them to me just do it
yeah i will i will take good care of what's the
worst that could happen It's in good hands. Yeah,
there's no cons. I see all pros. There are no
cons, all pros. And guess what? When you give
that money to me, I'm not going to tariff you.
So there you go. What a bonus, right? My man.
What a bonus. I won't tariff you. That is so...
It's so refreshing to hear, actually. Isn't it?
It really is. I won't tariff you. God, I wish.
Anyway. Back to that whole Carpe Diem thing.
So, Aiden, you got some DMs for us today? I got
some DMs. Let's do it. A couple people checked
in. My boy, Gumbo Swish of the Gumbo Clan. The
Gumbo Clan. Gumbo Swish asks, $700 daily to be
hired as the town madman. Oh, I'll do it. Like,
I don't even have to hesitate. So you're talking
like, there actually is. I heard a story. I don't
know if it was Valparaiso or Chesterton, but
this is all in northwest Indiana, the Chicagoland
we were talking about for all our foreign listeners.
Chicago's greatest reach, its metropolitan reach,
covers northwest Indiana, and those are two towns
in there. But there's a story of this local town
madman who just kept stealing bicycles. He just
kept stealing bicycles and he just put them in
a pile. He just had, he had this little hoard
of bicycles and people never saw him riding them.
He was always walking around. He just took the
bicycles to have them. Put them in a pile. That
type of menisery while, while harmful because
you are stealing property from somebody that
of course they might need. It's, you take a step,
you take a step back and it's kind of funny.
I. Love that. I would do that in a heartbeat.
Like literally just like run and just pop around
corners and surprise people. Be like, oh, have
you heard of the muffin man? And then just like
run away. Just like terrorize people all day
long. It's the main man again. Run! I would do
it. I'm really tempted, because what, 700 bones
a day? Yeah. Times 365 days. To just cause chaos.
You're talking 250 grand a year? Yep. Dude. I'm
in. I'm in. You don't even have to ask me twice.
I am in. I will be that guy. I will come up with
new and exciting ways to terrorize the public.
Quarter mill a year just to be a little menace
on the side? Just to be a menace. Come on. It's
not saying I gotta break the law, right? That's
true. Just be a little crazy, that's it. That's
true. I can do it. I will be that guy. Oh, hell
yeah. Next question I got. Nutsmith asks, I gift
you one million dollars, but I curse you with
a sentient toilet bowl. Every time you sit down
to shit, your porcelain throne will speak to
you about your bowel movements. Do you accept?
Wow. So, you become a millionaire. Yes. But that
once or twice a day of private time you get to
sit down, just... shit for ten minutes. Look
at your phone, read a book. Becomes interrupted
by your toilet bowl talking to you. Yeah. That
would be a nuisance. I'll say it. That would
be a nuisance. It would be a nuisance. You're
just sitting there doing your business, be like,
hey, hey, dude. You must have had corn. Yeah.
Do you know you have hemorrhoids? No fiber, boy.
Oh, man. It really stinks in here. And he's just
going to town on you. Right. That would be uncomfortable.
It would be. But what's pretty comforting is
seven figures in a bank. Seven figures in the
bank. Yep. So would I take that daily irritation
for seven figures? I think so. But what if that
toilet ends up being like mostly funny? That
would, I mean, yeah, you got to find the silver
lining in things, right? And it would be easier
to find a silver lining in things if you were
a millionaire. You know what, Maloney? I'm tired
of taking your shit. I would love it. Oh, yeah.
I would love it. It's like, hey, good bit, toilet.
I like that one. Good bit, toilet. Now I'm going
to flush you. I think I would be OK with that.
I think so. That's a fair trade. That's a fair
trade. A toilet with an attitude, and I get money.
And you get money, right. OK. So pros and cons,
I like the pros. I do, too. That is a - I do,
too. A fun question from from Nutsmith. All right,
Nutsmith. That's two positives so far. Two positives.
Here we go. I got a question from CrippyGru.
Crip, what's up? Our boy Crip, this is the last
DM I received. What's something you're an absolute
sucker for? Well, hmm. I am an absolute sucker
for Taco Bell. Yeah, and I know we just had that
fast food tier list a couple weeks back We did
we gave Taco Bell an a or an a -minus something
like that. Yeah, but there's just there's something
about The seasoned beef and the beans and the
nacho cheese and the shredded cheese and it's
just I don't know. It's easy, but it's ah I don't
know. There's something heartwarming about it
You know? Yeah, you know, it's one of those,
it's one of those places where you can still
have lunch under 10 bucks. Right. And, and be
full. Yeah. And be like, oh, I just had lunch.
I'm good. Yeah. I am a sucker for Taco Bell.
I am a sucker for a juicy IPA or a bourbon barrel
-aged stout. Yeah. Foreshadowing. Foreshadowing.
I love those. I'm a sucker for thunderstorms.
at 9pm. Yeah, like right when you're falling
asleep. Thunder cracks, you're like, oh, this
is gonna be a good rest. Oh, my man. Yes, that's
true. That's a good one. Yes. How about you?
Oh, I'm a sucker for Chicago -style tavern -style
pizza. Ah, shit, isn't that the truth? I'm a
sucker for that every time. One hour Munch Madness.
I mean, it did. I mean, even like, even if I
had dinner, say... And this is real. Say I have
dinner at seven o 'clock and my buddies on the
south side of Chicago be like, hey, blah, blah,
we're going to so and so's house, you wanna come
over? Yep. So you get cleaned up, dressed, out
the door, head over to that person's house. Hey,
what's up? You're having a couple beers? He orders
a pizza. Oh, my man. I just ate a few hours ago.
What am I doing? Eating the damn pizza. I'm gonna
demolish that shit. That's exactly what I'm gonna
do. Should have got one just for me. Hell yeah.
So yeah, that... I am a sucker for Latinas, man.
It's just... Oh, there you go. It's a thing.
It's been a thing since high school. So that
is my Achilles heel, as it were. Yeah, so Latinas
and pizza. And let's see if there's something
else. A warm day in a beach. Oh, there you go.
One day in a beach, man. I am a sucker for that
every time. That is some good stuff. I am a sucker
for a comfortable pair of shoes. There's nothing
like putting on a pair of shoes and somehow feeling
more comfortable than before you put them on.
I love a comfortable pair of shoes. That's good.
I wear socks all the time because I like... I
don't know, even if it's just a couple millimeters
of padding, right? I like the extra padding on
my feet. I always wear insoles in my shoes anyway.
But a comfortable pair of shoes on top of the
fact that I wear socks for probably two -thirds
of my entire life, waking or not. Yep. Comfortable
shoes. I love that. That's good. I guess I could
add... Here's the funny thing, though. It's like
I don't like winter. Sure. But I love sweaters.
I love sweaters and I love hoodies. And I guess
it doesn't have to be winter, you know? Fall
weather. Fall weather, right? 40s, 50s, 60s.
And you put on that hoodie or you put on that
sweater. I love it. Every day. Like, when it
starts creeping over 70, I'm like, damn, I gotta
put them away. Right, right. Because it's too
warm for them. Right. But I do. I love a sweater.
I love a sweatshirt. A hoodie. Sucker for the
Thanksgiving vibe. I am, man. Yeah. Oh yeah.
I am. Where it's just brisk enough where you
throw on your jeans and your boots in a hoodie
or like a nice flannel and get that fire started
in the backyard. Oh yeah. That's the shit. Leaves
are orange. Sun sets a little early. Somebody's
burning leaves somewhere. You get that scent
in the air. Breezy and dry, 55 degrees. That's
the shit. Shit. That's it right there. And you
know football's coming. Right. Exactly. Perfect
time of year. All of that. Perfect time of year.
Uh, anymore? Nah, that's it. That was it? Alright.
Uh, I'm gonna go with, uh, first one here. At
Gary Ghanous. Ghanous. Hi, guys. Remember that
skit from the Great Space Coaster? No Ghanous
is good Ghanous with Gary Ghanous. I love that
skit. By the way, what the fuck is a Ghanous?
I don't know. Gary... Gary, I'm gonna need a
hint of what's in your mind. Well, first of all,
I do remember the show. If you partake in the
herbal supplement, so to speak. The Devil's Lettuce?
The Devil's Lettuce, yes. They can. You should
watch The Great Space Coaster. Gen X, you're
welcome. We did do some good things. The only
thing coming to my mind is MST 3000. Yeah, well,
you're welcome for that one, too. That one's
pretty genius. I think a Gnu might be like a
wildebeest looking thing. I think it's GNU. I
think it's like a fucking wildebeest kind of
thing. At least that's what he looked like. That's
what the character looked like. I don't, Aiden's
doing some research. I'm doing some live research.
Gnu. I guess is a nickname for the Wildebeest.
Oh. But GNU is a type of software, GNU. Well,
I'm sure that wasn't it. So yeah, if you're a
nerd. Nerd. If you're a nerd, you probably know
GNU. GNU rather. But yeah, I guess it's just
a nickname for a Wildebeest. Oh, OK. So I was
right with the Wildebeest reference. OK. Every
once in a while, I pull the seat. Just a morsel
of knowledge comes out of the hard drive Like
I could put my car keys on my dresser and I wake
up in the morning I'm like I'll work on my goddamn
car keys and I sit there and look for 20 minutes
like oh They were on the dresser where I put
them last night and then I can pluck something
like that out I plucked this out last. We're
off the highway again. I plucked this out Last
night. I'm sitting at Bdubs. That's like my away
from office office, and I'm sitting there I'm
working on some content and doing some stuff
and these dudes are sitting next to me and Radar
Love comes on the jukebox, but it's not the White
Lion version. It's the Golden Earring version.
It's the older one. And this younger guy is like,
oh man, it's a great tune. And I'm just like,
I'm like, oh yeah, it's Radar Love by Golden
Earring. And he's like, oh yeah, I'm like, yeah.
And he's with this older guy and he's just like
nodding his head like in approval, approving
my comments. Good, good. And so then he's like,
wow, that's really awesome. I said, yeah, as
a matter of fact, there was a remake by White
Lion in the late eighties. I said, that one's
pretty good too. it out oh man I'm going to so
like he's taking notes and he's putting him in
his phone he's gonna he's like man and so he
looks at me he's like yeah what year is that
old one and I looked at him I go 1973 1973 I
pulled that shit out I lose my glasses for half
a day and I can pull golden -earing 1973 out
of my head. I think my hard drive's broken. That's
basically what I'm saying. No, that's... I understand.
To be able to pull that nugget out. Yeah. I can
lose my phone while it's in my hand. Oh, dude.
But I will forever know that both Mario and Air
Jordan 1s came out in 1985. I love that. I love
that so much. I totally understand. I manage
a couple of hundred of portfolios mostly for
middle class workers. There are 401k, their 401ks
are only worth about 301k. That's funny. Tell
me about it. These days, and I hate to be the
bearer of bad news. Should I quit my job before
they come after me with a pitchfork? Oh, man.
Well, first off, it's not your fault, Rainy Day
Fund. That is true. That is true. You're trying
to make them a little bit of cash. I wouldn't
quit your job. And of course you had to be the
bearer of bad news. Sometimes I feel like that
because my job is literally delivery. I deliver
products to people. So, you know, the whole thing
like don't shoot the messenger, don't shoot the
delivery man. I actually feel that sometimes.
So don't be that guy. Keep your job, you know,
keep your money. But I am mad about my 401k crashing.
So I watch your back also because I'll find you.
Yeah, oh for sure. I know people. Yeah, I do
too. They'll find you. Mm -hmm. We'll find you.
And we'll... We'll... store your mother. Yeah,
we'll store you. We'll store you. We'll make
an exception. We'll make an exception. Mr. or
Mrs. Rainy Day. Rainy Day. That's what we're
gonna do. Monsoir, Rainy Day. You chode. At Blacklisted
Bobby... Hi guys. Love your podcast. Thanks.
Some advice if you please. Okay. Recently a group
of friends have stopped hanging out with me.
They're excluding me in things we used to do
together. I don't know what the heck is going
on. Do you guys have any advice for me? Oh, blacklisted
Bobby. Username makes sense. I understand. Oh
boy, I would just... kinda... Open a line of
communication and ask why first and foremost.
Yeah, if that communication goes unanswered,
I would just say perhaps Maybe you guys weren't
that tight after all and you need to find new
friends. Yeah, that could be or I mean blacklisted
Bobby. Maybe you did something to get blacklisted
We should we don't know that side. Yeah, we're
surface level. We only know surface level things
here Bob Okay, so I don't know take some time
to introspect but also take some time to communicate
clearly, you know? You gotta have your feelings
heard. And if they don't validate your feelings,
as they should, then move on. You dig? I would
do that. If it's a group, I would pick the one
person in that group that maybe you are tightest
with. And here's the mistake, right? Because
we just talked a little bit about how people
are way into their phones and their iPads and
their iRacks and everything else. Talk to them
like if you know a bar that they're at or a place
that they work or some place They hang out a
coffee shop, whatever go there go there and get
in their face and just be like hey, what's going
on and Number one you're gonna find out something
Because they can't ghost you to your face the
people that are cowardly enough to ghost you
on socials and stuff like that, they are too
cowardly to do it to your face. That's true.
So you're gonna learn something. So I would bring
it up to them right to their face and just be
like, hey, what the hell's going on? What gives?
And that person is gonna tell you something.
At least give you some information. Now, if you
don't like the information or you think that
person's being an asshole, I got news for you.
Fuck that group. True. You don't need them. You
don't need them. Ski daddle, brother. Think of
the groups you had when you were six years old.
Think of the groups you had when you were 12
and when you were in high school. Make a new
fucking group. Right. Just go to the bar, go
to a coffee shop, just go out amongst people
and just... Just vibe. Just be, just vibe and
meet people and be done with them. Many, many
humans are very kind. Yeah. Find the kind ones.
Find the kind ones. Don't hang around with assholes.
Nope, nope. And if you have those that just treat
you like shit, or play games like that, life's
too short, man. Life's too short. Don't even
bother. Find other people. And if you can't find
other people, being alone, which I've done for
a while, not such a bad thing. It is good advice
to learn, because it is gonna have to be a learned
thing. Learn how to appreciate your own company.
Yep. It's very important and it's healthy too.
Appreciate me time. Go out to a restaurant solo.
Go see a movie solo. I used to go to movies with
people all the time, whether it was you guys
or a couple of my friends, whatever. I used to
love that. And then I got in the habit of doing
that solo many years ago. I love it. I love it.
It's like going on a date with yourself. Why
not? Right. Enjoy your own company enjoy your
own company. It's very freeing. So don't worry
blacklist. You'll be fine last one here at stoner
stanley 420 finally my man we get we get we get
the main me He's always got the main event good
old Stan stoner stanley 420 mo show Okay, Alan
and Momo are in my head man as they should I
can hear you guys all the time it won't stop
I think there's medication for that. I feel like
you are here with me and Kelvin. Why are you
in my head? I have a funny feeling. I have a
funny feeling. He's got those ear... And I think
we're on loop. And he's too high to realize that
we're on loop, so he probably thinks we're talking
to him all the time. He's one puff short of greening
out and doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know
what to do. Oh, dude, my man, Stanley, I would
just say just take a break, right? Take a little
break. Get your tolerance back. Yeah. Learn your
limits. For sure. Lay off that. you know, lay
off that stanky spinach for a little while. I
think there might be some stuff in that stanky
spinach. I was gonna say, if this is the first
time this has happened, someone may have laced
your batch. It's possible. You know, those brownies
may not just be weed brownies, you know what
I'm saying? Right. Just take her easy, okay?
Go to sleep. Go to sleep. Fixes everything. Go
to sleep. Right. You know, and who knows? Who
knows what you got, you know? whether whether
the sticky icky icky maybe maybe you got exactly
you know chlamydia for the fifth time who knows
i mean you know i remember that one batch he
had one time what does this tongue do and and
he smoked that stuff yeah yep and remember he
walked around hold his tongue the whole night
right was it tongue do i like i get the name
now i understand Sometimes the names make sense.
Sometimes they do. Other times it's like Luke
Skywalker's lightsaber cock hang. And then it's
like, well, why is it called that? And then you
taste it and it's like, yeah, something, something,
something in here. Yeah. Something in here reminds
me of Star Wars penis. Right. You know, and then
two hours later you end up swinging wiffle ball
bats at people. It's like, ah. I get it. I get
it. It always makes sense. Yeah, those strains
are crazy. Not that I would know, because I'm
not allowed. No, you are not. He is a good boy,
because he drives a truck. I have to be. How
do I have a big twerk? And they don't let me
do the weed. They don't let me do the weed. I
can't marijuana. Which is weird. Like, I get
the alcohol thing, but what's marijuana gonna
do? Make you drive slower? Right, and it's, like,
I get it if you're driving high. That's an issue.
If you're super like buzzed out right now, that's
an issue for pedestrian drivers That's of course
an issue for people driving commercial motor
vehicles, but like if you do it on your off time
Like that's that's where I don't find the issue
because people drink on their off time Yeah,
I don't know. I don't get it. Which is weird
because I think I think of truck drivers and
Not to single you out by any stretch, but I'm
thinking even back in the past where you would
have like, you know, some high driver or kill
school bus of 12 kids. He's been sitting there
driving all night and he's hopped up on uppers
and stuff like that. It's like, yeah, all right.
These guys are on crank and their uppers and
because they're driving all the time and they
just got to stay awake. And it's like, maybe,
maybe if he just took a couple of hits, it would
lower his anxiety, be chill. Yeah. Maybe actually
get some sleep at night and maybe get some sleep
when he needs it. You know I'm just saying it's
a thought it could be one of those weird legacy
laws would be with all the weed outrage ever
since the history of America and then the Lumber
industry destroyed hemp and weed and yeah, you
know that goes way back. You can look at the
history of that I'm not going into another lesson
today, but look at the history of why weed was
originally illegalized You'll find the lumber
industry had a hand in that Yeah, I'm sure. I'm
sure. Food for thought. Well, what a wonderful
segue. Food for thought. It's now time for the
other foods with Aidan Maloney. And Aidan scours
the globe for food. This is stuff people actually
eat. This is people eat. People eat, but would
probably make a billy goat puke. Damn right.
I'm really interested. What do you have for us
today? I went to the same rabbit hole of last
week. Okay. This is from the disgustingfoodmuseum
.com, where they source real foods that people
eat, like other foods we've covered before, like
sir strumming and other things like that. They're
on this list, but there are things on this list
I've never heard of before. Okay. This is something
I found that I will colloquially call piss eggs.
Oh no. And this is a food. It's okay. better
known as Virgin Boy Eggs. Translated from a different
language, Virgin Boy Eggs. Virgin Boy Eggs. From
Dongyang City. I'm sorry if I pronounced that
wrong. Trust me, I do try. China. Here's the
story from disgustingfoodmuseum .com. Young boys
urine is collected in schools and markets around
the city in buckets placed there by street vendors.
Eggs are then boiled in the urine until hard.
The eggs are then cracked and continue to boil
in piss to let the urine soak into the egg. The
golden eggs smell strongly of urine, but the
taste, quote, the taste has been described as
delicate, salty, and addictive. Oh no. It continues.
Of course there's a myth. There's always a myth
with these. The myth says the eggs are good for
your health, protecting against heat strokes,
decrease body heat, promote blood circulation,
and reinvigorate the body. The urine smell is
unmistakable in the stalls of street vendors
that sell them. Takes about a full day to make
the eggs, starting with soaking the eggs in urine,
then boiling them in that same urine, cracking
the shells after the boils are hard, and then
keep them boiling, still in the piss, to make
sure the urine gets into the eggs. Vendors keep
filling up the p - Keep filling up the pot with
urine to make sure the eggs are not overheated
and overcooked. God forbid you want the eggs
to be gross or anything. Right. The price for
boy eggs is about twice what regular eggs sell
for. It is a very appreciated part of local cuisine.
Oh, that's disgusting, dude. Here's where it
gets extra fucked up. The urine of boys with
maple syrup urine disease, attributed to diabetes,
is especially prized for the sweet taste. Mmm.
Mmm -mmm. No. Piss eggs. That's awful. Piss eggs.
That's so gross. Yeah. Oh my god. That's a bad
time. That is a bad time. Good god. So I was...
I was especially disgusted to find that one.
Of course it made that list of that website.
God bless that website. They've done all the
research that takes me hours to do, and they've
displayed it perfectly for me to read. All credit
to them. Disgusting Food Museum is where I sourced
these last couple weeks worth of other foods,
but that is just nasty. That's so gross. Yeah.
It's so nasty. Foul. Foul indeed. Well, thank
you for sharing piss eggs or virgin boy eggs
with us here on the Mark Mo Show podcast. We
are going to take a break, a much needed break.
I think I may need a vom. We're going to take
a little break and we come back our feature segment.
You just made the list. All right, we are back
for our signature segment on the Mark Mo Show.
It is you just made the list. It's a list. Thanks.
Are there rules? No, there are no rules. Well,
technically one, and that is that there are no
rules. I like that rule. We do a list, 10 through
2, with our big number one reveal at the end.
And it could be a list of just about anything.
We've done this for years now. So our lists are
vast. And I thought this one was interesting.
I can't remember us ever doing this one. So this
is this is going to be fun. This is the 10 worst
snacks. Oh, yeah. We are a family and we enjoy
a good snack. But because we enjoy a good snack,
we've had some bad snacks. That is true. So we
are gonna run through this. I'll start with mine.
Number 10, baked potato chips. Now - Ooh, something
about them being in the oven, hey? Now look,
don't get me wrong. It is a healthier version
of said potato chip, but they are not your old
school ruffles or lades or pringles. They're
just not good. Yeah. They're not good. And usually
undersalted, too. And it's just like, ah, what
am I eating? It's kind of weird how they could
be bad in both. I know, right? Because traditional
fried is good. Kettle is good. Yeah. But something
about putting them in an oven and baking them.
It's just no bueno. Yeah. Even mass produced,
it's like they can't get it right. No, they really
can't. Number nine, Swedish fish. Oh, not a Swedish
fish guy. I don't hate them. They're just underwhelming
to me. Sure, it's just like putting nothing in
your mouth I've always attributed them to the
color red because the flavor doesn't say anything.
It really doesn't it tastes like red It tastes
like red. Yep, and it gets stuck in your teeth,
which is a minus and that's all that stuff I
hate stuff that gets stuck in there. Oh, I agree
Number I never like dots Yeah, you know fuck
dots fuck dots Sorry go ahead Or now we're in.
We're like, oh, it's going to be that show. Nah,
it is that show. Sorry, you're number eight.
Number eight, Marmite. It is Australian. So for
our Aussie fans, you're probably like, I can't
do the accent. But yeah, they're probably. Is
Marmite Australian? Or is Marmite the UK version?
Because Vegemite, I thought was Australian. Oh,
Vegemite is, yeah. So is Marmite the UK one?
I think you're right. I think you're right. You
might be right. Yeah, fuck Marmite, hey. So it
could be Marmite or Vegemite. You thought Marmite
was from down under, hey. Yeah, I did. Get kicked
in the teeth by a kangaroo. I thought an emu
was, hey. Yeah, you can't. I bet you did. I bet
you did. Either way, it is saltier than salt.
It is disgusting. It's black. You put it on toast.
It's like tar, right? It's bad. It's just not
good. It's like flavorless tar. I don't know
why it's, oh, let's have some Marmite. Let's
have some Vegemite. Let's, let's, let's not.
Bing's on tarst. Let's put the Marmite on the,
no. No, let's not. I'll pass. Number seven, a
plain Hershey's bar. Oh, yes. Good. I agree.
Look. I love a Reese's peanut butter cup. I love
some other various candy bars. The old Whatchamacallit
is a tasty one. Isn't Reese's made by the Hershey's
company? Yeah. So how can you make something
so tasty as a peanut butter cup and take a chocolate
bar that just tastes like ass? Tastes like sand
and it's not good. It's not good. It's a it's
really bad. It's a bad chocolate bar. Like when
you're at Halloween, I'd rather have the apple
from the creepy guy than somebody throw like
a full size Hershey bar. I'd be like Thought
you liked me man like give me the carton of raisins
instead at least that has flavor me the raisins
Just give me something with a razor button. Yeah
Don't do that. Don't advocate. Oh Don't advocate
that we advocated for humor purposes only Anyway
number six Pistachios No, I don't like them.
I don't have I don't like how they taste I don't
like all the work just to have to get to one
that isn't even a snack Honestly, I can agree
with that part. It's a lot of work It's a tiny
tiny little nut and you got to like get a pry
bar to get that freaking thing out It's like
this is not worth the work Pistachios are to
nuts as pomegranates are to fruit It's so much
work for so little reward. That's true See, I'm
on your side now. Yep. Yeah. Number five, Candy
Corn. No, you're not one of the candy corn haters.
Corn. That tastes like candy. No, it tastes like
shit. God damn it. That is Lewis Black, another
comic who I love very dearly. And he had that
whole skit on. Oh, it's a brilliant skit. So
if you have never seen it, check it out. But
he's dead on. It's like... It's just, it tastes
like nothing. Like, I imagine if you melted your
candles in your house down and put them into
a teardrop shape, it would taste like candy corn.
That's where they got the name from, you know?
Candle corn? Candle corn. And then it was just
colloquially candy corn. Candy corn. Yeah. Makes
all the sense now. Absolutely. History lesson
for you. Number four, sour gummy ass worm. Look,
my kids— Sour gummy ass what? My kids— Gummy
ass? Sour, let me repeat that, for those hard
of him, for our boomers in the audience. If you
haven't tuned out already. Sour gummy ass worms.
Oh hell yeah. My kids tortured me with these
goddamn things forever. Hey dad, oh all of you
did. Gummy worms jerks. Yeah, all of you did
like you got a dad you want some candy? I'd be
like sure and I'd sit there and two bites in
I just get this look on my face and they all
be like he he he it's like I hate you all of
you Time and time and time again, I fell for
it like an Alzheimer's patient like oh, they're
giving me a candy a gummy worm things sour as
fuck Sour gummy ass worms bad Don't eat them
Make sure they go out of business. I can't believe
I was that cruel as a child, but that's hilarious.
Yep. In retrospect, I wish I could be that cool
these days. I guarantee you Sarah and or Kara
and or Alex will remember your shenanigans that
led me to the funny face making. I'm sure. Number
three, black licorice. Oh, fuck that shit. Like
the red rope stuff? Love it. I could just like
put a bag in front of me. I'll just munch on
that shit. The black one, like, do you hate someone?
Like, why would you make it? They make teas that
have black licorice flavor. Oh, why would you
do that? They're heavily medicinal and they actually
help with colds and stuff. Yeah. I can't drink
them. Nope. Like, fuck it. Like, let the flu
take my life. I cannot. Same thing with Yeager.
Right? Because Yeager tastes like black licorice.
Yes. And it's gross. Yeah, people go, oh, Jaeger
bombs. It's like, no. No, let's not do that.
What's wrong with you? What's wrong with you?
When did Jameson become a bad thing? Just give
me a shot of that. Always. Number two. Cotton
candy. I've had a discussion with people recently
on cotton candy really. Oh you dislike cotton
candy I'm like, yeah take cotton candy which
like it's on it's on that little Little stick
fucking thing spray or something with luck. It'll
stay on there Really doesn't usually and you
got the whole thing and it's like you eat it
Here's the thing if you had a big bowl of water
and you dipped it in it would be gone in two
seconds Yes, just gone and you're left with this
liquidy sugar mess. Yeah, it's just it's gross
I don't like the consistency and whether you
get the blue or you get the pink or any other
color It all tastes the same right ass on a stick.
Yeah, it's like a pixie stick grew up to be a
fluff ball That's about right. You know, I don't
like it. I don't like it at all. I'm in the same
boat I've never been a fan. Yeah, I'm not a fan.
You know, that's, that's the, like, I'll... Honestly,
I fuck with the Reese's cups. Yeah, oh yeah.
But cotton candies are what the dentists have
been warning us about. Oh yeah. I'm sure of it,
because it's acid and sugar. Yes. Yeah, like
a dentist would be like, oh yeah, here's all
the snacks, why would you do, why would you eat
that one? What's wrong with you? Do you hate
your teeth? Yeah, so that's my number two. That's
a good one. I will save my number one for the
end. Okay, I kind of went a similar but different
route. I kind of went from memory of the worst
snacks I ate or tried to eat. Okay. So these
are all from memory of the worst snacks I've
had to endure. Number 10, warm orange juice.
Oh, I will go one better. Okay. Warm orange juice
after you brush your teeth. Oh, fuck, buddy.
After you brush your teeth, it's disgusting.
It's the worst. Yeah, that's nasty. It's like,
I'm thinking like you left the orange juice at
breakfast, forgot about it. It's a hot, humid
summer day. You go out all day, you come back,
it's still there. And you're like, oh, orange
juice. It's bad. Yeah, warm orange juice is nasty.
Number nine, Wheat Chex cereal, no milk. Oh,
why? Exactly. It's the worst cereal, first and
foremost. It's awful. And then you go milkless.
Nasty. No, don't do it. Number eight, the old
crusty white rice you forgot in your fridge.
Yeah. It's just, you can reinvigorate it, sure,
but like, you're talking a lazy snack you just
pull out and eat. It just tastes like pebbles
and stuff. It does. That's gross. And a little
crunchy. Too crunchy. And way flavorless. Yeah.
Number seven, four -day -old birthday cake. Mmm,
you want to talk dry that shit tastes like ash
Yeah, I mean you're talking volcano right after
it happened taste the air. That's four day old
birthday cake Yeah, just just go to the beach
and eat a pile of sand. Yeah same same feeling
number six an unseasoned beef patty Yeah beef
itself in my opinion. It doesn't really especially
ground beef. It doesn't really taste good You
need to season it. It's gotta have... You need
to doll it up a little bit. Yeah, the burger
accoutrement, you know. It's just not, it's not
bueno. Number five, old bloomed Hershey's chocolate.
Yes. It's disgusting. It's awful. Hershey's chocolate
fresh could have been on this list. Yeah. But
when it's old and bloomed, it is additionally
sand and nastiness. Number four, lunch meat,
but when it's slimy. Because it's not off. It's
not rancid. It's just slimy and that makes it
disgusting. Right. But that slimy stage is right
before the going bad stage. Right, right. Which
is why when you get to it and it's like that,
I'm like, nah, I'm chucking that. It's edible,
sure. But it's gross. Yeah. It's gross and unpleasant.
Number three, stale tortilla chips. In my opinion,
tortilla chips are the worst chip stale. They
are right. They're hard. They're like You crunch
into them, but it's half crunch half foamy and
your teeth feel bad It's like there's a crunch,
but then there's like a chew after the gas. Yeah,
it's weird. I don't like it. Yeah, I like it
number two soggy spinach I I'm one of those weirdos,
right? I enjoy fresh spinach, fresh arugula,
fresh lettuce. Like, I'll just eat a handful
of it. To me it's just whatever it's what I eat
before my regular meal to feel like I'm a healthy
human being. But when that shit gets soggy, or
if it comes out of a can, God forbid, dude, vomit.
Actual vomit. No good. I will gag. That's bad.
I agree with you. That's my number two. My number
one. The big reveal. You can find them, especially
a lot of dollar stores at checkout. Convenience
stores? And around Halloween. Circus peanuts.
Oh, man. They look like peanuts, but they taste
like shit. You dare talk about Styrofoam like
that? It has its purpose. It is Styrofoam. It
is the worst. I don't know who... Look, who did
it? Who made it? They bastardized a marshmallow.
I guess. In a way, right? Right. What is its
flavor? Is my question. What is its flavor? I
can't identify it. I really can't identify it.
I just remember as a kid having it a few times
and then just being old enough to realize I'm
never gonna do that again. Yeah. And then I haven't
since then. Yeah, exactly. And I just think about
the meeting at whatever company has circus peanuts
back in probably like the 1950s yeah like uh
jerry yep we wanted uh something creative something
new from you what do you got uh uh how about
circus peanuts Well, what? You mean just like
a peanut? No! No! It just looks like a peanut.
What if we left a marshmallow out to dry, but
it was next to a porta potty? And they're different
colors, but they look like a peanut. Get this
man a raise. Get this man a raise. By golly,
it's going to be the greatest snack ever. Oh
yeah, circus peanuts are gross. So disgusting.
That's a good answer. Good answer. My number
one, I've had it so many times, I have found
a way to rectify it. Okay. but it's still number
one in this state, cold leftover french fries.
Yes, oh that's so good. That's the number one
worst snack in my opinion. It's just not, it's
inedible. And I know that's a very first world
thing to say because there are some people who
have it really rough and would like to eat cold
leftover french fries instead of starving to
death. But I, I'm a privileged person. And that's
the worst snack I could think of. That is really
good. I'm almost bummed that I didn't fit it
into mine somewhere. Cold fries are disgusting.
As a matter of fact, a lot of times... Like if
you're just in a rush and you grab some fast
food I'm just gonna wrap some lunch and then
like you're heading back home you realize Okay,
that was already ten minutes ago when I ordered
rates and you're thinking immediately I'm gonna
have to open this bag put my sandwich on the
side and just mouth these french fries because
fries are teetering already They're already teetering.
Yeah, like you've got a solid five to seven minutes
to consume those fries before they start getting
cool Right and then another five or seven minutes
just throw them away, right? It's so tight Yeah,
so it's a tight window. Yeah To enjoy a nice
hot french fry. I agree. That's good. Yeah, very
good good lists I would say very good less once
that we always throw this out there if you have
something Maybe we miss that you find absolutely
disgusting Throw it on socials. Let us know let
us know. We'd love to hear from you And always
mark mo show podcast like subscribe all that
kind of good stuff. We're not in a review preview
I review movie I preview movie And this week,
I went to see a movie called A Working Man. Oh,
yeah. Yeah, I went to see that one. LeVon Cade
left behind a decorated military career and the
Black Ops to live a simple life of working construction.
However, when human traffickers kidnap his boss's
daughter, his search to bring her home uncovers
a world of corruption far greater than he ever
could have imagined. Takes place in Chicago.
Haha. My man. My man. The film stars Jason Statham,
Michael Pena. David Harbour, Arianna Rivas. There
wasn't a very deep plot, nor were there a ton
of backstory to learn more about Statham's character,
or Harbour, who is actually his best war buddy,
but you don't know a lot about their story. Maybe
if they do another movie, maybe they will, but
at any rate, it's really not what you're paying
for. You're paying for Jason Statham has to go
get the girl. And that is going to require him
to be like John Wick for 45 minutes. Right. Right.
That's what you're paying for. Yes. And you're
not disappointed. I mean, you get a movie starring
Jason Statham produced by Sly Stallone. You're
going to expect some guns going off and explosions.
As the Lord intended. As the Lord intended. I
give it a solid 7 .5 out of 10. I was very entertained.
When you go in expecting a certain kind of movie,
you're just entertained. I wasn't expecting an
Academy Award winning film. I was expecting a
couple laughs and a lot of action and just a
decent enough story to put two and two together
and be like, oh yeah, that was pretty good. Yes.
And that's something we talked about the other
week is how all the The discrepancy between the
film critics rating versus the audience rating
is like these film critics all high and mighty,
but the audience goes into the film with an expectation
that fits what the movie is. And that's perfectly
fine. Go into the movie with the expectation
to enjoy yourself. 100%. If you are a Jason Statham
fan, you'll enjoy the movie. Plain and simple.
as you should. Yep. Now my preview is for a movie
called The Accountant. Forensic accountant Christian
Wolf teams up with his estranged but highly lethal
brother to track down mysterious assassins. The
film stars Ben Affleck and John Barenthal. The
movie hits theaters April 25th. The first accountant
was really good because he's really, he's almost
a guy that's like he's brilliant. Like he's probably
almost like genius brilliant, but maybe a little
bit on the spectrum, too. But he's like trained
to kill. So very interesting dynamic there. And
then bringing, of course, John Barenthal from
The Walking Dead in and it's also the Punisher
to just come in is this heavy. That's his brother
who's like just a just a blunt. Right. Right.
And he's just going to kill as many things as
he can. Like I see that movie and I'm like. Once
again, expectations. I go into that like, oh,
this is going to be great. Oh, it's going to
be high. There's going to be a lot of shooting
and killing, and I'm down with that. Yes. Very
exciting. Yeah. So that's it. And obviously,
I haven't been sleeping on these. I'm very well
aware of these movies. But Aidan, so many weeks
go by where I'm just sleeping on things. Oh,
no. And you go, no, no, no, no. Check this out.
And I go, oh, my god. No, no. I slept on that.
Whether it was a game a movie a show. What what
did we sleep on this week? Call me the alarm
clock because you're about to be woken up. No
more sleeping. This is a game I've talked about
indie horror games a handful of times I've covered
movies more recently But this one I wanted to
bring up because I played it very recently and
it was mind -blowing in a really good way Hmm.
It's a video game called the ten bells Okay.
Now, I don't know if it's based on a real place
but there is a pub called the ten bells and this
video game it is an indie horror game oh okay
based in a pub so it kind of mirrors reality
the synopsis really is you're trapped in an old
english pub unravel a chilling tale by identifying
anomalies while trying to escape confront the
horror as you survive the endless loop of these
10 bells. So it's like a psychological horror
game mixed with that anomaly finding type game.
It does it really well. And this came out in
the summer of 2024. Oh, this is recent. So it's
recent, but it's not like super recent. And I
haven't seen a lot of videos or commentary about
it. And I feel like it's just been slept on.
I don't know why I thought it was really good
and You know indie horror games are cheaper than
triple -a games or most anything else these days
The game itself is only what four or five dollars
and you can go no way hours of entertainment
out of it So highly recommend that It goes on
the ten bells an anomaly horror game set in a
timeless English pub this unsettling escape room
draws you into a world of surreal anomalies and
a hidden story where every detail matters and
the ghostly past lingers around you so There
is a deeper story some of which I got to in,
you know the video I released on my channel recently.
Yeah, but it's highly rated but it's like under
-reviewed, under -appreciated, and I thought
I'd give it a shout because I had a lot of fun
playing it, and it's, like I always say it, every
time I review one of these indie -style horror
games, is it's just, it's too good. It's too
good to just be $4, you know? There's so many
$70 AAA games that are meh. And then you find
little gems like this that are four bones. It's
like, what? This is four bones? So yes, highly
recommend the 10 bells. Easy to lose several
hours into it and you will get the shit scared
out of you because I definitely did. I love it.
So ten bells ten bells. I definitely want to
check that one out. That sounds like so much
fun It is a lot of fun. That's amazing. All right,
we're gonna take a quick break when we come back
We are gonna sample some beer as we do every
week and to finish up with a world of weird news
On the Mark Wosho podcast All right, everybody,
we are in the home stretch of the Mark Mo Show
episode 10. And we, of course, do beer reviews
each and every week. And we do our untapped reviews
and grades and the whole thing. So what do we
have this week, Aidan? This week, the Kentucky
Bourbon Barrel Imperial Milk Stout from the Lexington
Brewing and Distilling Company. Very exciting.
So it's a Imperial stout or double milk stout
rather 12 % Oh mama so she spicy she spicy Universal
so you're talking seven over seven thousand damn
near eight thousand ratings on untapped not sponsored,
but it is a free app four point oh five out of
five That's impressive on this on this rating
from everybody so it it does pretty well, but
we're about to give you our review on the official
beer review of The Mark Mo Show. That's true.
Very exciting. So if you are enjoying a brewski,
of course, it's Saturday morning, but you know
what? Damn it. It's the weekend. Treat yourself.
That's what I'm thinking. The way I look at it
here, it's what? Not quite eight o 'clock on
a Friday night. People are just starting to get
ramped up here, and I would imagine on the East
Coast, people are already getting into it. And
then from there, what is that, about six hours
getting over to Europe? I bet people are still
up. That's true. They might be winding their
nights down. That's true. So if they're drinking
right now, but when this episode airs... Oh,
right. That's true. Yeah, that's kind of what
I was referencing. Ah, that's right, because
it will air sometime on Saturday. Saturday morning.
But Saturday morning is also five o 'clock somewhere,
blah, blah, blah, whatever they say. Right. Crack
one open. We actually have people that listen
in Russia. So... That's true. That is true. It's
at the afternoon, right? Yes. If it's the afternoon
for them, it's the afternoon for you. I am very
certain the people in Russia would like very
much to say, hey, listen to guys in America.
We love them. None of these, you know, Putin
Trump guy, these guys, they're talking about
this stuff. They talk good stuff. If no vodka,
drink beer. Drink beer if you don't have the
vodka. Yeah, so Russians, we love you. Not so
much your leader guy, but we know you guys are
good. A majority of the people out there are
the same, but we are. Yep. That's the way I look
at it. So we love you guys. Thanks for listening.
Kentucky bourbon barrel. Let's drink. Imperial
milk stout. Slainte. Slainte. Tell you Irish
people don't listen, start listening. Oh. Holy.
Okay. Um. Okay, I'm getting, there's notes of
coffee, because it's got that roasted malty coffee,
damn near cocoa flavor to it. But then you get
the milk stout, which kind of brings you back
into that smooth territory. Oh, wow. You could
have told me this was 6%, I'd believe you. 12?
12? That's, now look. Holy. And you're, by the
way, for all the listeners out there, this is
not an inexpensive bottle of beer. No, it's expensive.
You're talking a bottle retail costs you about
five bones. So in a bar, you're talking seven
plus. If you get a pint of this somewhere, yes.
Right. Absolutely. But golly, is it worth it?
Oh my God. I'm, all right, I'm blown away. I
don't... I don't get blown away by these bears
easily, but to be fair, and we're looking at
our grading, because I've graded upwards of maybe
like 40 bears. Aidan's probably well into the
hundreds by now. 400 plus. 400 plus. And here's
the thing. This might be, and once again, it's
hard to give a perfect grade on anything, because
you're saying nothing can be better than what
you're having if you give something a perfect
grade technically. That might be the best damn
beer I've ever had. And I'm not even, I've had
the Gilded Rock, I've had the Chimay, those are
all excellent. This is phenomenal. It is really,
really fantastic. And I like a stout. I love
Guinness. Yes, yes. This is better than Guinness.
Oh, I would agree. Easily. I would agree. Guinness
is one of the lighter stouts out there. It is
really drinkable. It's very light. Crushable.
Yeah. I guess is the term these days. This, you
could have two of these and be done for the night.
This is a dessert -y. Oh, absolutely. I mean,
it's got some sweetness to it. But yeah, definitely
heavy on the cocoa and coffee flavor notes. Holy,
it is fantastic. Well, you know how you can bake
and cook with Guinness as well? Sure. I'd make
a dessert with that. Like a brownie or something?
Right, right. Oh, dude. That's fantastic. That
is so good Man, I am just I'm blown away. Yeah,
I'm blown away Honestly, I'm torn between and
please believe us. We're not sponsored by any
of these companies or anything I'm torn between
four seven five out of five. Yeah, or five out
of five. I am it's really up there because also
to sometimes with Like a harsher IPA or a stout
or something. That's just a little heavier A
lot of times it'll leave something on the palate,
a little bit. A little bitter note or something.
This does not. I think it's because they did
it perfectly and I mentioned that a little bit
ago of how the bitter notes of the coffee and
cocoa are kind of walked back by the fact that
it's a milk stout, like it's got the lactose
in there, it's got the milk in there. It's mixed
phenomenally. It really is. I I that's four seven
five out of five for me. That is I believe the
highest rating I have given on this show yet
Yeah, oh no doubt and I'm I'm right there with
you I'm gonna go 4 -7 -5 also. I really am. As
I said, it's hard to give a perfect grade to
something. This is about as damn close as you're
gonna get. So if you like darker beers, if you're
a Guinness fan, whatever, try this. I think you're
gonna love it. And as we said, an end of the
evening, maybe you go to dinner with... with
your dude or your girl or whatever, and the dinner's
over, and you're just kind of winding the night
down. Maybe you get some dessert or some ice
cream or something. Get this. Because it will
pair perfectly. Or if you don't have room for
dessert, you'll find room for this. This is the
dessert. Yes. Yeah. This is really, really phenomenal.
That was great. I completely agree. And this
is not something that you'd buy a case of and
crush. Nope. You know, this is something you
crack one or two open on a special weekend day
and enjoy. You enjoy every ounce, every one of
the 12 ounces in here. That is really good. Yeah,
I enjoyed that. I'm so happy with that. I enjoyed
that very much and I'm gonna keep enjoying it.
Yes. As we finish our... 10th episode and make
sure you listen next week too because we're gonna
have an interview fireside chat we had a fireside
chat already with someone from an organization
ymca many of you are probably familiar with that
and if you're somewhere else in the world maybe
you have organizations similar uh it was a great
interview i'm going to interview with a local
real estate agent uh next week and it's going
to be a really great conversation because She's
so involved in the community and she's an advocate
for so many different types of people and we
could really go a lot of different directions
I think we're gonna try to stick in real estate
for this conversation as It pertains just all
the crazy stuff going on right now. So we're
gonna have that conversation next week But for
now, we're gonna finish up with our final second
the world of weird news right here on the Mark
Mo show podcast Aidan I would love to hear your
story because you already gave me like a warning.
I gave you a hint. So there was this trend a
couple years ago of people online telling everyone
else like hey look up Florida man plus your birthday
on Google and it would give you a result of your
personal Florida man story. All right. Of what
happened in Florida with that crazy Florida man.
Yep. On your birthday. Okay. So I did mine. July
13th my birthday. I did that on AK 219 a couple
months ago My girlfriend Jordan her birthday
August 28th. Yes, that's what I found All right,
so August 28th this happened five years ago Florida
man arrested with pound of cocaine Some of which
kept on his stack of bacon deputies say This
story comes from Kiro7, local, out of Florida.
Port St. Lucie, Florida. A Florida man was arrested
Wednesday after deputies found more than a pound
of cocaine. Pound, by the way. That's a lot.
That's a lot. Of cocaine in his truck and even
more inside his home when they searched. Damn.
Including some they found on top of a stack of
his bacon. The St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office
said, The man in question. Yes was pulled over
around 7 p .m. This day and deputies find a bag
filled with nearly a pound of cocaine in his
back seat Deputies found more cocaine during
a search of his home around 9 p .m. Some cocaine
was found quote directly on a stack of bacon
in his fridge Investigator said oh no these 62
year old man. Oh, dude 62 and you got pounds
of cocaine sitting on top of your breakfast ingredients.
I mean, first of all, I don't know what type
of breakfast you get into. But if I have crack
cocaine or even pure cocoa on top of my bacon.
Uh huh. Dude, skip the Bob Evans. That's fair.
Invite me to your place. The 62 -year -old man
was arrested and charged with two counts of cocaine
trafficking according to the jail records. He
was released on $70 ,000 bond. Someone posted
the $70 ,000 bond. Yes, okay. Which, I mean,
I guess if you have multiple pounds of cocaine
and can afford to store it with your bacon. Sure,
you probably have 70 grand laying around. Probably.
But like, dog. First of all, how do you get pulled
with a pound of cocaine in your backseat? If
you've got a pound of cocaine in your backseat,
you better be driving like the safest person
on earth. Oh, for sure. I'm talking two under
the speed limit, full stopping, three seconds,
every stop sign. You cannot get pulled. with
a pound of cocaine in your back seat. Oh, no
doubt. No doubt about it. I mean, it's just and
then of course, like the reason it made the Florida
man history that it has. He stored it with his
bacon in his fridge, dude. That's unbelievable.
And of course, they get the search warrant for
his house after they after they take him in with
a pound of cocaine. How do you keep that with
your bacon? I'm not sure. Mean it's already sus
to keep raw meat next to vegetables. Yes, but
you're keeping raw meat Next to your next to
your next to your coke highly valuable. Yeah
medicinal product right Right. I would I'd like
some eggs Definitely would like bacon a little
crispy Alongside of some white girl interrupted,
please Sprinkle that maybe on the table pixie
dust I will take all of the eggs and bacon and
coke that you have. Oh, that's funny. Oh my god.
Oh yeah, had to. Coke and bacon. I love it. One
man. That's a great Florida man story. I've kind
of gone around the world a little bit recently.
As you should. I found this lovely story out
of the UK. Mom mortified when toddler eats cremated
grandfather's ashes. Quote -unquote, I'm still
trying to process it. Bro, your toddler's processing
it in his organs, dude. Holy... Once again, I
love the way... I love the way writers write
their articles overseas. We've done this recently
with people from New Zealand and Aussie and now
the UK. Don't we do the same shit, though? Like
you're given a piece of gold. You have to make
this into your magnum opus. Have to. All of the
rules that you learned in journalism school throw
it out the window when you get a piece like this.
Here's how it starts. He had a grand father slam
breakfast. They shut up go get it go get it a
Lincoln Shire UK mom was mortified after walking
into her living room to find her one -year -old
son Devouring Oh God is grandpa's cremated ashes
Detailing the post -mortem dust -up at a viral
tick -tock I'm still trying to process it and
a guest Natasha eminy told cater's news service
understandably a gas Understandably the Lincoln
resident had popped upstairs for just a few minutes
to put away some laundry When the Brit returned
she saw her son Koa covered in ashes, whereupon
she realized, to her horror, that he'd unknowingly
eaten her father's remains. Oh my god. It took
me a moment to realize it was, in fact, my dad's
ashes, exclaimed Emily, who quickly snapped a
video. You know, fuck collecting dad at this
point. We're taking a video. Who quickly snapped
a video at the scene of the grime. Let's go.
First of all, I just want to say, Emine, God
bless your soul. I'm claiming it right now. That's
millennial behavior. Isn't it? So is the clip
captioned, when your son eats your dad. This
is like, this is Armie Hammer's wet dream right
here. Holy. Shows the tiny terror innocently
and obviously strolling around the sofa with
his clothes and face smeared with ashes like
a volcano eruption survivor. The camera then
pans to an empty decorative vase with the top
removed and his granddad's dust spilled all around
it. My son has eaten my dad's ashes. Ebony wailed
in the clip. She found the desecration particularly
perplexing given that she'd placed the urn on
a top shelf where she thought the Fam ish hot
no But was dead raw I Love this the writer should
get an award. Oh my this is great this dude on
SNL writing Oh my god, you have to only in addition
the toddler had never previously shown any interest
in the urn Despite it being there his whole life.
He's only a year old Toddlers are like cats.
They will fuck up everything everything on anything.
Absolutely Thankfully koa didn't suffer any adverse
effects from his macabre meal His mother asked
doctors for advice They said to give him water
and he'll be fine. Oh my god in the comments
viewers were appalled at the gastronomic get
together But it's like a family reunion in my
intestines. It really is. This is great. This
writer. Oh my god home run Please say this is
an April Fool's joke exclaimed one to which emity
replied. I wish it was Thankfully, she learned
to see the funny side of the posthumous family
reunion Quipping he never met him his grandfather.
Yeah, but now they are always together Well,
I got news for you know They're not because there's
a thing called a bowel movement Granddad's gonna
he's coming out the other side think of the nutrition
granddad is helping literally build his cells
He really is he really is my dad would be creasing
which is cracking up To the perplexed parent
added he definitely would have laughed. We all
love a bit of dark humor This isn't the first
time a hangry toddler has eaten their grandpa
post -mortem. What? In January, Colorado mom
Monica Long was appalled after discovering that
her sons might have consumed their grandfather's
ashes when she went to use the bathroom. Oh my
god. The boys got paw -paw. Long exclaimed in
a cliff of the incident. You know what's funny?
You know what's funny? Kevin. On AK -219, we've
got the segment called What the Fuck, which we,
it's similar to the World of Weird News. Okay.
He brought up her story. He brought up that -
That story? That Colorado mom story. No. He brought,
like, the whole thing, like, they got Paw Paw.
Because in the Colorado mom story, they got Paw
Paw, knocked over his urn, vacuumed up his ashes.
And then she put a little sticky note on the
vacuum that said Paw Paw and just kept the ashes
in the vacuum. So I can't believe these two stories
are connected somehow. They really are. That's
hilarious. That's just great. Holy. The international
community has not let me down for three weeks
running, so I greatly appreciate that. Beautiful.
just amazing uh but that that is it is time for
the old show wrap up uh aiden thank you for everything
you do a great co -host uh producing the show
all that kind of good stuff uh his podcast aka
219 and also aiden spelled the right way yes
Damn right. Beautiful. So definitely check those
out. And I want to just thank local businesses
that support us. Jatoni Greek Grill, Smoketown
Blues Barbecue, Valpo Family YMCA, Curry, Ford
of Valpo. Curry Buick GMC, Simcoe Signs, Life
Centers of Valpo, and The Entertainer Magazine,
as well, of course, as AK219. So everybody, thanks
for listening in. You got anything you want to
say to these fine folks before we get out of
here? Don't eat grandpa. Don't do that. Bye.
Please like and subscribe. See you next week.