WEBVTT

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motherhood where sleep is a rumor and laundry

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is eternal and somehow we're supposed to be raising

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tiny humans through it all we're here to laugh

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at the chaos cry when necessary and remind you

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that none of us actually know what we're doing

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this is no manual a mom cast your mom friend

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group chat but with microphones well welcome

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back to no manual a mom cast today so zeta turned

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one about six weeks ago and Cruz turns one tomorrow.

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Is that his actual first birthday? Yes. Because

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his party was yesterday. Yep. And so we thought

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it'd be fun to kind of just like talk about what

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the first year of our second kid's life has been.

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Yeah. Being mom of two. Yeah. What it's like

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the second time around. Yeah. So that's just

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kind of what we're chatting about today now that

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both of our youngest are turning one. Which is

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crazy. So crazy. Makes me sad. But... Before

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we get started, do you have a mom moment you

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would like to share? I do. So it actually is

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from, so we did have Cruz's birthday party yesterday.

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And you guys were there and then my dad and stepmom

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and then some other friends. And I just knew

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like, so Cruz is very much a meat and potatoes

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type of guy. Loves. Just classic. Just classic.

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Just would love a steak. And we thought about

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like, should we just. like, when everyone sings

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him happy birthday, should we just put, like,

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a ribeye in front of him? He would have loved

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it. We should have done that because we did.

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We put a cupcake in front of him, and he legit

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wanted nothing to do with it. Zero interest.

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Yeah, zero interest. We, like, I even took some

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of the frosting and, like, put it on his mouth,

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and he, like, used his hands to try to, like,

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get it off his mouth. And I'm like, dang, this

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is, like, you are totally your father's son in

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that respect, but I have such a sweet tooth,

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so. I just I don't understand. So we ended up

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like tried a couple of times of like trying to

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feed it to him. And he just was like, I don't

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want this. Yeah. So I got that off his high chair

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and gave him just a piece of sausage from breakfast.

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And he just like went for it. He loved it so

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much. I was like, man, this kid. It's just so

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funny because he's so chunky that you just expect

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him to be like, food, give me food. And he's

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just so picky. And so I just thought that was

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super funny. But at least he has good taste.

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He's not picky in that he will only eat the cupcake.

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That's true. It's easier to be like, okay, I'll

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give you more protein. Sausage and bacon, I guess

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that's what it is. Yeah, exactly. So it was a

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super fun party and just crazy that we're already

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at that. that point yeah i feel like this year

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definitely went by so fast it really did it really

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did okay what's your mom moment okay mine is

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like it's one of these weird i think i already

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maybe told you a little bit about this it's one

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of those weird things where like it's kind of

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funny and kind of sad and i also just like don't

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know how to handle it so lloyd has started doing

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this thing what he started saying if he gets

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in trouble is lloyd be better And I'm like at

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some point I must have said that to him. Yeah.

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Because there's no way at two and a half he just

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like figured out that that's what he should say.

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Yes. So and I can't imagine I'm like there's

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no way grandparents have said this to him like

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Lloyd you need to be better. Even like he spends

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a lot of times with grandparents so he does get

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disciplined there. Yeah. But like I can't imagine

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any of our parents saying that. Like just be

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better. Right. Yeah. So I'm sure like. in a moment

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of frustration or something like that, I'm sure

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I had to have said it, which makes me feel like

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the worst mom in the world. Oh, I get it. I get

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it. You need to be better. And I can't think

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of like when I did this, but yeah, the first

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time it happened. was he had gotten in trouble

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at dinner because he was like throwing his food

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or spitting his milk or something like that.

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And then we were having like snuggles at bedtime.

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And what happens if there are certain things

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like throwing his food and spitting his milk

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that the only discipline or punishment that has

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helped at all is taking away his lightning McQueen.

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So if it happens at dinner, that means he doesn't

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get it the next day. Oh. And sometimes if it's

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like the morning goes really well, give it to

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him in the afternoon, something like that. And

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does he seem to remember? He does. Because of

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last night, I don't get. lightning today yeah

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I mean some I do have to remind him but he definitely

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has started to like understand the correlation

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yeah otherwise I wouldn't you know keep doing

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it because otherwise that's just like kind of

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cruel yeah and so then we were like doing bedtime

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snuggles and it came up for some you know we

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were talking about a stay or something like that

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and it came up like yeah Lloyd you threw your

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food at dinner so you don't get to play with

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lightning tomorrow he just goes like be better

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oh and both Stuart and I were just like oh and

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then the next have everything you want and the

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next time it happened to be fair this was not

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my like shining moment but he I was like trying

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to get him to go upstairs like our garage is

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on our first floor but then our kitchen and everything

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is on our second floor and so we were coming

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in I think I had groceries in my hand or something

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like that and I was trying to get him to go upstairs

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and he was like no no no so I took away his cruise

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car which is like his other most prized possession

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and it definitely was a little bit of like an

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impulse just like okay if you're not listening

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then I'm taking your car yeah like not my shining

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moment but then like we finally got upstairs

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and just like in tears like oh buddy like that's

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I mean yes you Do you need to be better at like

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listening and doing what we're telling you to

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do? But also like, I don't want this to be your

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mindset of like, you need, I don't know. Yeah.

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It's such a hard thing. It is. Yeah. Oh my gosh.

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It's like you are not doing the right thing.

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Yeah. But also, yeah. It's so tough because like

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in those moments when they're just so heartbroken

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or they like say phrases like that, it just makes

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me want to give in so badly. And I'm like, yes,

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I want. I want you to have everything you could

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possibly want. And the fact that I'm the one

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who took that away from you, even though it was

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due to what your behavior was or the consequence

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that needs to happen, it's so heartbreaking.

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It is. Yeah, it makes me so sad. If anyone else

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made my kid cry like that, I would be furious.

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Oh, yeah. But I can't just let you get away with

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doing whatever you want. Yeah. Yeah, we just

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started like timeouts with Colt. And they're

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like two minutes long. And like he either has

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to sit on the step, like first step on the staircase,

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or he has to go to his room. Like it kind of

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depends on which one is he going to listen to.

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But it's so heartbreaking because I'm like I

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put him in timeout and he's usually just like

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losing it. Like so sad. And it makes me just

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want to be like. It's fine, buddy. Just come

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give me a hug. It's okay. You, I know you just

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hit your brother in the face, but it's not a

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big deal. Yeah. But come here. Yeah. Yeah. I

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try to, cause we do timeouts sometimes too. And

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sometimes it helps. And sometimes he's just like,

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whatever. And so that's not really like, I don't

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want you to be upset, but also if you don't care,

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it's clearly not working. But I've been trying

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to like. when he has timeouts after it's done

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having like one telling him why he had timeout

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like reiterating and making sure he knows like

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hey you hit your sister in the face and that's

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not okay so you don't get to play with you didn't

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get to play with her and you were in timeout

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and then also like having a moment of like i

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love you like and like connection so that way

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he knows that my love for him is not dependent

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on his behavior exactly even though like I'm

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sure it feels like that sometimes when you're

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two. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah. It's, I feel like

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this has been such a challenging age for me.

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And I know we're just kind of rambling, like

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going off on a tangent, but this age has been

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so incredibly challenging for me. Yeah. And I'm

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like, this has been the hardest age for me, I

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think. And also it's been so like the most fun.

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It's like. I would agree. The same. Yeah. Yeah.

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double -edged sword almost because when i feel

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like the things that are hard were not the things

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i was necessarily prepared for yeah i think we

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talked about this i think we were texting at

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probably like 3 a .m or something the other day

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um where when people talk about like the terrible

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twos it's usually like tantrums and stuff like

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that and yes lloyd has tantrums yeah but those

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i can kind of hang with like do i love them absolutely

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not but I like know how to help him regulate.

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And, you know, I can kind of like keep my cool

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when he's just throwing a tantrum over something.

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It's the like discipline and the not listening.

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Like he's just picked up saying no. Oh, that

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wasn't an option. Like I told you, you had to

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do something or you had two options. You know,

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a lot of times it's like with the stairs thing,

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like I can carry you or you can walk. We're going

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upstairs either way. Yeah. And then he'll just

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say no. yeah yeah staying here was not an option

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and yeah yeah and then the discipline part i

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don't think i wasn't prepared for that oh and

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part of it is just he's so young so how to discipline

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to feel like older kids start to understand things

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like getting grounded or whatever um and he he

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just doesn't i know part of me is like is he

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still too young to be disciplined in this factor

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i don't because he's not like understanding it

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but I have to say, I don't know. But then also

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I feel like you start to wait too long. Then

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he just builds that behavior where he doesn't

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listen at all. Exactly. Yeah. One of the things,

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our big issues right now, is Lloyd just throwing

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his food and spitting his drinks. We have no

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idea. The throwing food, I think. Zeta kind of

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does it naturally because she is a one -year

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-old and he thinks it's funny so I think he's

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kind of picked it up from her and then if he

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does it she laughs and then it's like this really

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annoying cycle so that's where I think that came

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from the spitting drinks we don't know yeah I

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find that if someone is teaching him this if

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he's learning this from someplace probably church

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I will kill this person like it is so frustrating

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because he also thinks it's so funny yeah and

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so we have to like try to tell him, no, it's

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not funny. But one of the things I was like,

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if I thought his brain could handle it, which

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I don't think it can, I would like try to do

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a reward instead. Like, Hey, if we go a full

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week where you don't throw your food and you

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don't spit anything, then you get a new car or

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you, you know, we'll go to the store. You can

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pick anything, you know, or something like that.

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But I don't think like he's two and a half. So

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he's like the impulse control still isn't quite

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there, which I know is part of the problem. Yeah.

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That's so tough. And you're like, do you actually,

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like for a whole week, that's like keeping that

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on the forefront of his mind. Yeah. Be a lot

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of reminding and just, yeah, that's, it's so

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tough. The whole listening thing for me is so

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tough right now. We have like for Colt, we have

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him like turn on his listening ears. So like

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anytime he's with somebody else before we leave,

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we're like, okay, buddy, turn your listening

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ears on. And he literally goes. dude he's usually

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a great listener for other people he's like yeah

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which is like what we want I want you to be really

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really good for other people and then I totally

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understand if you like if you need to have a

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breakdown or a tantrum or like I would much rather

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you have that with me than somebody else right

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so yes we haven't turned on his listening ears

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and sometimes when he's not listening I'll be

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like I guess your listening ears weren't on,

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buddy. We got to turn those on. And if he's like

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losing it, he'll say, I did have my listening

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ears on. I'm like, okay, you got to show me that

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you have them on. And then he'll like in his

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tears go. turn them on and it's so like i don't

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know if it really works but it it works okay

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like for now sometimes any little thing that

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helps is better than nothing yeah for real so

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okay well tangent yeah over maybe i'm sure we'll

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go we'll get back there yeah yeah so yeah like

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you said like this episode just we've each had

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our two kids for one whole year. Obviously our

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first kids we've had longer than that, but two

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under two for the past year. How are you doing?

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I mean, so one of the things I realized is how

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quickly you forget things like milestones and

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things that are hard and things that get better.

00:13:05.490 --> 00:13:08.309
And so I think right now, like Zeta is getting

00:13:08.309 --> 00:13:10.889
to an age that I was like, Oh yeah. It gets so

00:13:10.889 --> 00:13:13.009
much more fun. Like the baby age kind of sucks.

00:13:13.210 --> 00:13:16.149
Yeah. And that's not because I don't like having

00:13:16.149 --> 00:13:20.409
a baby, but it is the least exciting time. Yeah.

00:13:20.470 --> 00:13:22.529
You know, we're getting to the point where she's

00:13:22.529 --> 00:13:25.210
showing interest in things and she's starting

00:13:25.210 --> 00:13:29.129
to talk like Lloyd at a year old had like five

00:13:29.129 --> 00:13:31.610
words that he said on repeat. It was like mom,

00:13:31.769 --> 00:13:36.049
dad, cat. up which was pretty much everything

00:13:36.049 --> 00:13:40.470
else and and light right and like yes and zeta

00:13:40.470 --> 00:13:42.690
just like every time we turn around it's another

00:13:42.690 --> 00:13:46.889
word which is crazy but also so fun to see like

00:13:46.889 --> 00:13:48.970
the things she's picking up in her interests

00:13:48.970 --> 00:13:52.309
and it's just weird to me to like we experienced

00:13:52.309 --> 00:13:55.909
this with lloyd not that long ago yeah that yeah

00:13:55.909 --> 00:13:58.879
but I already forgot like how much more fun it

00:13:58.879 --> 00:14:01.039
is when you start to get to this age. Like she's

00:14:01.039 --> 00:14:05.080
so close to walking and, you know, we go to playgrounds

00:14:05.080 --> 00:14:06.759
and she crawls around and goes down the slide

00:14:06.759 --> 00:14:09.759
and requests the swings and stuff like that.

00:14:09.940 --> 00:14:14.279
So I think overall, like it's really fun right

00:14:14.279 --> 00:14:17.220
now because both kids are at really fun ages.

00:14:17.960 --> 00:14:20.580
But also like we were just talking about, there's

00:14:20.580 --> 00:14:22.659
a lot of really hard things that come with it.

00:14:23.289 --> 00:14:26.250
like zeta definitely is learning to throw tantrums

00:14:26.250 --> 00:14:29.990
oh man i mean it's usually over like i set her

00:14:29.990 --> 00:14:31.649
down in the moment she doesn't want me to set

00:14:31.649 --> 00:14:33.750
her down and she just like flails on the floor

00:14:33.750 --> 00:14:39.129
um very dramatically girl i gotta wash my hands

00:14:39.129 --> 00:14:43.659
yeah your poopy diapers. Oh, that's always. Yep.

00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:45.460
That's the other thing is we're getting to the

00:14:45.460 --> 00:14:48.740
phase where diaper changes are obviously the

00:14:48.740 --> 00:14:50.659
worst thing that's ever happened to her. Yeah.

00:14:50.740 --> 00:14:52.480
So there's like, there's good to it and there's

00:14:52.480 --> 00:14:55.120
bad to it. But I think like overall it's really

00:14:55.120 --> 00:14:57.000
fun. There's just like these pockets of things

00:14:57.000 --> 00:14:59.639
that are really hard, like the tantrums and like

00:14:59.639 --> 00:15:02.320
she still doesn't sleep through the night. Most

00:15:02.320 --> 00:15:05.399
nights, you know, stuff like that, that it's

00:15:05.399 --> 00:15:08.899
like this will end eventually. I know. Yeah.

00:15:09.039 --> 00:15:12.820
But. Yeah. What about you? Yeah, I feel like

00:15:12.820 --> 00:15:15.419
a lot of that is similar. I feel like this last

00:15:15.419 --> 00:15:19.940
year has flown by. Oh, yeah. For us. Like, with

00:15:19.940 --> 00:15:22.299
two kids, I don't know if you feel this way,

00:15:22.480 --> 00:15:26.860
and I oftentimes can feel kind of bad. Cruz is,

00:15:26.899 --> 00:15:31.120
like, he's a fairly easy baby during the day.

00:15:31.360 --> 00:15:33.799
Okay. Like, night times are still pretty tough

00:15:33.799 --> 00:15:36.840
for us, just, like, he's up a lot. It's not like

00:15:36.840 --> 00:15:38.860
it's hard in the night. Like, he's not, like.

00:15:39.610 --> 00:15:42.049
super hard to settle you're just not sleeping

00:15:42.049 --> 00:15:45.870
i'm just yeah he's just up constantly but i feel

00:15:45.870 --> 00:15:48.549
like during the day he's pretty like not self

00:15:48.549 --> 00:15:51.129
-sufficient but like he'll sit there and if i

00:15:51.129 --> 00:15:53.529
he like has interest in a toy he'll sit there

00:15:53.529 --> 00:15:55.990
and play with it and be fine while i'm like giving

00:15:55.990 --> 00:15:58.870
colt the attention that he needs and yeah so

00:15:58.870 --> 00:16:01.610
oftentimes i feel like i like i can feel bad

00:16:01.610 --> 00:16:03.909
because i'm like using a lot of my attention

00:16:03.909 --> 00:16:07.210
for colt and it's and unless we're all playing

00:16:07.210 --> 00:16:11.169
together It's hard for, and Cruz is totally fine.

00:16:11.450 --> 00:16:13.809
Like he's just like, he's chilling. You know,

00:16:13.809 --> 00:16:18.350
he's been a much more like chill baby than Colt

00:16:18.350 --> 00:16:21.450
was. Just like go with the flow. Like he gets

00:16:21.450 --> 00:16:24.570
it. Like I can't always give him the attention

00:16:24.570 --> 00:16:26.990
that he needs. Sometimes he like, yeah, loses

00:16:26.990 --> 00:16:29.970
it when I have to set him down. He's pretty clingy

00:16:29.970 --> 00:16:33.019
in that sense of like. He wants me to hold him

00:16:33.019 --> 00:16:35.480
a lot of the times. But he's just, he's fairly,

00:16:35.620 --> 00:16:39.279
like, go with the flow. And I remember before

00:16:39.279 --> 00:16:42.899
Cruz was born, I, like, was telling people and,

00:16:42.919 --> 00:16:46.019
like, praying for this. Like, I just need a baby

00:16:46.019 --> 00:16:48.320
that's, like, can just go with the flow with

00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:53.139
us. Because Colt is very, he's super, like, he

00:16:53.139 --> 00:16:56.259
just wants people to be with him, play with him.

00:16:56.539 --> 00:16:59.720
Like, I love that about him. And now his imagination

00:16:59.720 --> 00:17:03.039
is starting to like grow and we're starting to

00:17:03.039 --> 00:17:04.740
see a little bit more of that independence come

00:17:04.740 --> 00:17:07.640
out for him. But he still very much wants mommy

00:17:07.640 --> 00:17:11.299
and daddy to like to play with him and be a part

00:17:11.299 --> 00:17:14.599
of everything he does. And so oftentimes I find

00:17:14.599 --> 00:17:17.059
myself like, oh man, I feel like I'm neglecting

00:17:17.059 --> 00:17:20.920
Cruz in that sense, which. I don't think I am,

00:17:21.000 --> 00:17:23.019
but you know, like. Yeah, you just get in your

00:17:23.019 --> 00:17:26.039
head. In the height of emotion, I can feel that

00:17:26.039 --> 00:17:30.039
way. But I'm so grateful for Cruz and his personality

00:17:30.039 --> 00:17:32.859
being that way because that's what I think I

00:17:32.859 --> 00:17:36.119
needed in a second baby. For sure. But like I

00:17:36.119 --> 00:17:38.960
said, this last year has just absolutely flown

00:17:38.960 --> 00:17:42.000
by. The milestones, I feel like with Cruz, like

00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:45.819
they came on a lot quicker. I don't know if realistically,

00:17:45.960 --> 00:17:48.400
like they actually happened quicker than they

00:17:48.400 --> 00:17:51.059
did with Colt. I think some of them did. It's

00:17:51.059 --> 00:17:54.279
funny because, I mean, we've all heard the, like,

00:17:54.299 --> 00:17:57.339
boomer parents or grandparents being like, well,

00:17:57.400 --> 00:17:59.500
my kids were crawling. You know, and the joke

00:17:59.500 --> 00:18:01.400
is, like, my kids were crawling at three weeks

00:18:01.400 --> 00:18:03.799
older. Like, that's not how that worked. But

00:18:03.799 --> 00:18:06.799
part of me gets that now because with so many

00:18:06.799 --> 00:18:09.440
things with Zeta, I had to, like, look at pictures

00:18:09.440 --> 00:18:12.660
or something to figure out where Lloyd was at

00:18:12.660 --> 00:18:15.359
at that age. Like, is she behind? Is she ahead?

00:18:15.539 --> 00:18:18.970
I don't know. I had a baby. less than two years

00:18:18.970 --> 00:18:22.829
ago and now and i forgot all of this like when

00:18:22.829 --> 00:18:24.789
did he start doing things and is that because

00:18:24.789 --> 00:18:27.309
we blocked it out you think or is it like i mean

00:18:27.309 --> 00:18:29.970
part of it is just overload which is happening

00:18:29.970 --> 00:18:32.410
i yeah i don't know because i've also talked

00:18:32.410 --> 00:18:35.710
to other moms yeah and even moms with kids who

00:18:35.710 --> 00:18:37.630
are a little bit older i know one of my friends

00:18:37.630 --> 00:18:40.049
her kids are just like a couple years older than

00:18:40.049 --> 00:18:44.140
mine and when she met lloyd he was like six months

00:18:44.140 --> 00:18:46.440
old and she's like honestly i have no idea what

00:18:46.440 --> 00:18:48.420
they're doing at six months old i have two kids

00:18:48.420 --> 00:18:51.900
totally forgot what six months is um and i totally

00:18:51.900 --> 00:18:54.799
feel that now and so it's weird having a kid

00:18:54.799 --> 00:18:57.019
this like having the second kid i'm like what

00:18:57.019 --> 00:18:59.099
are you supposed to be doing right now yeah well

00:18:59.099 --> 00:19:01.220
i listened to you talk about zeta how she's like

00:19:01.220 --> 00:19:04.059
saying all these words and i'm like well cruz

00:19:04.059 --> 00:19:07.759
is only saying three like three four things sure

00:19:07.759 --> 00:19:10.859
yeah and it's like i mean kids just are the span

00:19:10.859 --> 00:19:14.059
of like learning and development is so again

00:19:14.059 --> 00:19:16.779
lloyd i think he probably had four words till

00:19:16.779 --> 00:19:19.619
he was like 18 months i mean i'm sure it like

00:19:19.619 --> 00:19:22.720
was gradual yeah but it's probably two years

00:19:22.720 --> 00:19:26.220
when he like his vocabulary took off yeah so

00:19:26.220 --> 00:19:28.559
this is weird for me where i'm like oh you're

00:19:28.559 --> 00:19:30.539
gonna be speaking in sentences by the time you're

00:19:30.539 --> 00:19:33.759
two like very soon Lloyd and her will just be

00:19:33.759 --> 00:19:35.980
like chatting with each other. Yeah. And that's

00:19:35.980 --> 00:19:37.920
so fun. I'll be like, what are you saying? What

00:19:37.920 --> 00:19:40.420
are you? What's happening in your language? Yeah.

00:19:40.599 --> 00:19:43.720
I have heard that is that like young siblings

00:19:43.720 --> 00:19:47.039
will have like kind of their own language. Yeah.

00:19:47.079 --> 00:19:48.660
Just because they don't have to pronounce things

00:19:48.660 --> 00:19:51.160
as clearly and they understand each other. Yeah.

00:19:51.240 --> 00:19:54.069
So it's weird to see the milestones. Yeah. And

00:19:54.069 --> 00:19:56.369
just be like, I totally forgot what you're doing

00:19:56.369 --> 00:20:00.289
right now. And then like, do I panic? Do I not

00:20:00.289 --> 00:20:02.690
panic? Are you super ahead? Are you super? I

00:20:02.690 --> 00:20:06.150
don't know. And I don't think I expected that.

00:20:06.170 --> 00:20:08.549
No. Which is, I mean, it's fine. I mean, both

00:20:08.549 --> 00:20:10.750
my kids have been fine and they're definitely.

00:20:11.009 --> 00:20:13.390
But you can get so in your head about it too.

00:20:13.430 --> 00:20:16.049
I know that with, with Cole, like there were

00:20:16.049 --> 00:20:18.490
things that I felt like he was behind in or ahead

00:20:18.490 --> 00:20:22.210
of the game in like, and. Obviously, social media

00:20:22.210 --> 00:20:25.049
was like making me feel like, oh, my gosh, do

00:20:25.049 --> 00:20:27.470
I need to go get my child tested for this? Like

00:20:27.470 --> 00:20:30.970
there was actually what like with Cole. So he

00:20:30.970 --> 00:20:34.569
had torticollis when he was born, which is he

00:20:34.569 --> 00:20:37.470
could only turn his head to one side. And it

00:20:37.470 --> 00:20:41.230
was social media that like kind of helped that

00:20:41.230 --> 00:20:43.829
awareness for me. Like, oh, I need to go and

00:20:43.829 --> 00:20:47.609
get this checked out for my child. So there's.

00:20:47.950 --> 00:20:50.269
I mean, I completely see the benefits of like,

00:20:50.390 --> 00:20:53.789
you know, motherhood stuff on social media and

00:20:53.789 --> 00:20:56.650
all that. But like the development portion of

00:20:56.650 --> 00:20:58.430
it. Yeah. There's like things where I'm like,

00:20:58.490 --> 00:21:01.329
oh, my gosh, there was. Yeah. Stuff with Colt

00:21:01.329 --> 00:21:03.569
that I'm like, is he behind? Is he good? I think

00:21:03.569 --> 00:21:07.549
that's one thing that I feel there are things

00:21:07.549 --> 00:21:09.529
that had happened that have happened with Zeta

00:21:09.529 --> 00:21:12.329
that they happen with Lloyd or if Zeta was my

00:21:12.329 --> 00:21:14.859
first kid. I feel like I would have handled very

00:21:14.859 --> 00:21:17.039
differently. Like I know I've talked about before.

00:21:17.160 --> 00:21:20.180
She is just a little peanut. She's finally in

00:21:20.180 --> 00:21:23.299
the ninth percentile for weight. Nice. But yeah,

00:21:23.380 --> 00:21:25.160
so I've talked about that before. And for probably

00:21:25.160 --> 00:21:28.279
the first six months, we had weekly to biweekly

00:21:28.279 --> 00:21:30.279
weight checks to make sure she was gaining weight

00:21:30.279 --> 00:21:32.599
and that she was good. For the last six months

00:21:32.599 --> 00:21:35.059
of my pregnancy, I had weekly ultrasounds to

00:21:35.059 --> 00:21:38.339
check on this. And after she was born, they were

00:21:38.339 --> 00:21:40.200
like, you should try formula, you should try

00:21:40.200 --> 00:21:42.420
formula, you should try formula. And not that

00:21:42.420 --> 00:21:45.680
I'm like inherently against formula, but I had

00:21:45.680 --> 00:21:47.660
no reason to think she wasn't eating enough.

00:21:48.019 --> 00:21:50.279
And so it's like, well, why would... It seems

00:21:50.279 --> 00:21:52.140
like I'm producing enough milk from all the evidence

00:21:52.140 --> 00:21:54.319
we have. She seems to be eating enough from all

00:21:54.319 --> 00:21:57.000
the evidence we have. So at this point, it's

00:21:57.000 --> 00:21:59.900
literally just a numbers game that she's not

00:21:59.900 --> 00:22:02.359
fitting into this perfect category. When we have

00:22:02.359 --> 00:22:05.500
a fairly small family, I wouldn't say any of

00:22:05.500 --> 00:22:08.700
us are, I would not call myself petite, but as

00:22:08.700 --> 00:22:11.140
a little kid, I was small. My mom was small.

00:22:11.240 --> 00:22:14.400
My mother -in -law was small. It's just a genetic

00:22:14.400 --> 00:22:19.079
thing. Yeah, so with that, I think if she had

00:22:19.079 --> 00:22:22.339
been my first, I probably would have given in

00:22:22.339 --> 00:22:25.279
to formula immediately. Because you didn't know

00:22:25.279 --> 00:22:26.420
any better. Because I didn't know any better.

00:22:26.480 --> 00:22:28.299
And doctors are telling you that. Right. And

00:22:28.299 --> 00:22:31.359
with Zeta, I could go, okay, let's look at all

00:22:31.359 --> 00:22:33.859
the options. Let's make sure she's good. And

00:22:33.859 --> 00:22:35.359
then if that's the best option, it's the best

00:22:35.359 --> 00:22:37.799
option. And then finally, we were kind of disappointed.

00:22:38.000 --> 00:22:40.200
It's like, she's gaining weight. She's just small.

00:22:41.319 --> 00:22:44.880
That's it. She's small. And now she's eating.

00:22:45.630 --> 00:22:48.130
whole foods and drinking whole milk and guess

00:22:48.130 --> 00:22:52.910
what she's still too small yeah and then i think

00:22:52.910 --> 00:22:55.329
the other thing with when it comes to like milestones

00:22:55.329 --> 00:22:59.009
that i have like kind of figured out the the

00:22:59.009 --> 00:23:01.930
key to like at least when i feel like i should

00:23:01.930 --> 00:23:06.069
panic is is it stalled or is it slow because

00:23:06.069 --> 00:23:08.930
with zeta there have been a couple things one

00:23:08.930 --> 00:23:11.750
of the funniest stories was I think it was her

00:23:11.750 --> 00:23:13.230
nine -month appointment. They were like, so is

00:23:13.230 --> 00:23:15.549
she pulling herself up on furniture? I was like,

00:23:15.609 --> 00:23:18.069
no, not yet. And he was like, okay, you know,

00:23:18.069 --> 00:23:21.869
I'm not worried yet, but if by, like, 10 or 11

00:23:21.869 --> 00:23:23.670
months she's still not, like, give us a call

00:23:23.670 --> 00:23:25.049
and we'll see if there's anything we need to

00:23:25.049 --> 00:23:27.950
worry about. Like, okay, cool. That afternoon.

00:23:28.730 --> 00:23:30.410
She was like, oh, I got it. And she was pulling

00:23:30.410 --> 00:23:33.490
herself up. Like, I can do this. I'll prove it

00:23:33.490 --> 00:23:37.450
to you. Right. But I think, again, doctors can.

00:23:38.279 --> 00:23:40.539
say things in ways that make you feel like something's

00:23:40.539 --> 00:23:43.140
wrong whether they intend to or not like yeah

00:23:43.140 --> 00:23:45.460
they just want to make sure you have because

00:23:45.460 --> 00:23:47.799
they're going off like a general average right

00:23:47.799 --> 00:23:51.500
of things and that's the same thing with like

00:23:51.500 --> 00:23:54.460
with cruises eating his last appointment i think

00:23:54.460 --> 00:23:56.819
was his nine month appointment so he has his

00:23:56.819 --> 00:23:59.519
one year appointment this next week and same

00:23:59.519 --> 00:24:02.609
thing the doctor was like OK, what is he eating?

00:24:02.710 --> 00:24:04.269
And I'm like, you know, he doesn't really like

00:24:04.269 --> 00:24:08.769
a whole lot meat. He loves meat, potatoes, like

00:24:08.769 --> 00:24:12.250
things like that. And she's like, OK, well, you

00:24:12.250 --> 00:24:14.890
know, let me know. But like before 11 months,

00:24:14.950 --> 00:24:16.890
if he's like not picking up because he wasn't

00:24:16.890 --> 00:24:20.130
even eating very much at the same time. And it's

00:24:20.130 --> 00:24:21.990
the same kind of thing where it's like, oh, my

00:24:21.990 --> 00:24:24.730
gosh, my mind goes a million different places

00:24:24.730 --> 00:24:27.869
whenever they say. say things like this which

00:24:27.869 --> 00:24:31.170
i know there's no ill intention of course behind

00:24:31.170 --> 00:24:34.250
it they're just doing their job but they're going

00:24:34.250 --> 00:24:37.970
off like a general average and we ultimately

00:24:37.970 --> 00:24:41.730
we know our kids the best and i feel like mom

00:24:41.730 --> 00:24:45.630
instinct is even higher for me this time around

00:24:45.630 --> 00:24:48.509
yeah and i can trust it more yeah that's part

00:24:48.509 --> 00:24:51.349
of it is you just you learn to trust it right

00:24:51.349 --> 00:24:55.279
where first time around you don't really know

00:24:55.279 --> 00:24:58.400
like what's anxiety what's my gut what's yeah

00:24:58.400 --> 00:25:01.259
what to do um what's right what's wrong here

00:25:01.259 --> 00:25:04.140
like yeah is social media telling me the truth

00:25:04.140 --> 00:25:06.559
like do I need to think something's wrong with

00:25:06.559 --> 00:25:09.759
my child what do I do yeah yeah so I think I

00:25:09.759 --> 00:25:12.420
saw something I think maybe even when I was pregnant

00:25:12.420 --> 00:25:15.880
with Zeta or when she was really young about

00:25:15.880 --> 00:25:20.930
like I wish my oldest had me as a mom the way

00:25:20.930 --> 00:25:22.930
my second does, but I wish my second had the

00:25:22.930 --> 00:25:25.190
time alone with me that my oldest did. And I

00:25:25.190 --> 00:25:27.789
thought that was like super interesting and just

00:25:27.789 --> 00:25:29.069
a really good point. Cause it's like, yeah, I

00:25:29.069 --> 00:25:31.750
wish I could have like the hours on end with

00:25:31.750 --> 00:25:35.009
Zeta that Lloyd got that she never will. Yeah.

00:25:35.190 --> 00:25:38.289
Um, in the same way, but also like I'm a more

00:25:38.289 --> 00:25:41.650
confident mom. I, you know, I'm not going to

00:25:41.650 --> 00:25:43.269
rush her to the doctor as often cause I've already

00:25:43.269 --> 00:25:45.329
learned to like, Oh, okay. You know, this fever

00:25:45.329 --> 00:25:47.589
is fine. You know, this will break in a day and

00:25:47.589 --> 00:25:49.609
she'll be fine. Yeah. Yeah. And learned like,

00:25:49.900 --> 00:25:53.440
when to and not to panic quite as much and it's

00:25:53.440 --> 00:25:57.720
easier to just like have fun and yeah be just

00:25:57.720 --> 00:26:00.799
more i think overall just more confident like

00:26:00.799 --> 00:26:03.819
you said yeah they're not rushing to the worst

00:26:03.819 --> 00:26:08.059
case scenario yeah with Second, I still even

00:26:08.059 --> 00:26:10.839
find myself like with Colt. We went to the doctor

00:26:10.839 --> 00:26:14.640
a lot when he was a little baby. Just for many

00:26:14.640 --> 00:26:18.039
like random multiple things. Yeah. I still find

00:26:18.039 --> 00:26:21.200
myself like panicking more with him than I do

00:26:21.200 --> 00:26:23.900
with Cruz. That's really funny. Same situations.

00:26:23.940 --> 00:26:27.259
Like if Colt has a cough versus if Cruz has a

00:26:27.259 --> 00:26:30.099
cough, I'm like. Colt, we got to take him to

00:26:30.099 --> 00:26:32.380
the doctors. He's probably having a, I mean,

00:26:32.380 --> 00:26:34.619
he's got some asthma stuff going on, but like,

00:26:34.640 --> 00:26:36.799
like he's probably having an asthma flare up,

00:26:36.819 --> 00:26:39.319
blah, blah, blah. Like, whereas with Cruz, same

00:26:39.319 --> 00:26:42.220
exact cough. And I'm like, he's probably, yeah,

00:26:42.240 --> 00:26:43.759
he's probably, he's probably got a little bug

00:26:43.759 --> 00:26:46.240
he's dealing with. Like he's probably okay. So

00:26:46.240 --> 00:26:49.619
Lloyd had RSV when he was six months old. It

00:26:49.619 --> 00:26:51.839
wasn't bad. Like he was never hospitalized or

00:26:51.839 --> 00:26:54.319
anything like that. And the only reason we know

00:26:54.319 --> 00:26:56.779
is because we took him to urgent care and had

00:26:56.779 --> 00:27:00.240
him tested. Yeah. And now if Zeta had the same

00:27:00.240 --> 00:27:03.059
type of sick, I don't like, we'd probably like,

00:27:03.099 --> 00:27:06.079
yeah. It's probably RSV, but I'm not paying the

00:27:06.079 --> 00:27:08.119
$80 to urgent care for them to tell me that.

00:27:08.200 --> 00:27:10.460
So we're just going to use a nebulizer, keep

00:27:10.460 --> 00:27:13.900
her comfy. Yep. Monitor it. If things get, yeah.

00:27:13.960 --> 00:27:16.960
Same thing with Colt. He had RSV. We actually

00:27:16.960 --> 00:27:19.039
took him to the emergency room twice. Oh yeah.

00:27:19.099 --> 00:27:21.039
I think I remember that. Yeah. He like almost

00:27:21.039 --> 00:27:23.259
stopped breathing, didn't he? Yeah. He, so he

00:27:23.259 --> 00:27:26.500
did have like the retractions going on. And so.

00:27:27.279 --> 00:27:29.279
The first time we took him in, they, like, they

00:27:29.279 --> 00:27:31.779
suctioned him, like, which is the saddest thing

00:27:31.779 --> 00:27:34.740
ever, seeing them. Because they use, like, full

00:27:34.740 --> 00:27:37.839
powerful machine suction. It literally, like,

00:27:37.940 --> 00:27:40.099
made him turn purple because they're, like, taking

00:27:40.099 --> 00:27:42.220
the breath out of you to get all of this mucus

00:27:42.220 --> 00:27:45.180
out. And he's just this small little baby. He

00:27:45.180 --> 00:27:47.619
was also six months old. And they're just, like,

00:27:47.680 --> 00:27:50.420
holding him down. And Michael and I are just

00:27:50.420 --> 00:27:52.759
standing there, like, watching this happen. I

00:27:52.759 --> 00:27:54.099
guess I'm supposed to trust you right now. Yeah,

00:27:54.099 --> 00:27:57.759
I was literally in tears. And then. Like we ended

00:27:57.759 --> 00:27:59.859
up taking him back a second time, like a couple

00:27:59.859 --> 00:28:02.779
of days later. And I thought for sure, I was

00:28:02.779 --> 00:28:05.380
like, they're going to admit us. They did not

00:28:05.380 --> 00:28:08.680
admit us, but like, I mean, same thing. Obviously

00:28:08.680 --> 00:28:10.619
if the retractions were happening with Cruz,

00:28:10.779 --> 00:28:14.420
I would be, yeah, there's, there's stuff like,

00:28:14.539 --> 00:28:17.779
but I just feel more confident in like how to

00:28:17.779 --> 00:28:20.660
deal with sickness, how like the nebula, you

00:28:20.660 --> 00:28:23.019
know, like. using all the tools that are available

00:28:23.019 --> 00:28:26.079
to us rather than just like immediate panic mode

00:28:26.079 --> 00:28:28.779
and also kind of knowing like what tools are

00:28:28.779 --> 00:28:31.960
worth it and yeah yeah like the nebulizer oh

00:28:31.960 --> 00:28:34.500
my gosh yeah yeah and both after you like told

00:28:34.500 --> 00:28:36.440
us about that we were like yeah we'll pay 50

00:28:36.440 --> 00:28:39.720
bucks for this yeah and both kids like it weird

00:28:39.720 --> 00:28:42.460
yeah colt loves it he thinks it's fun yeah uh

00:28:42.460 --> 00:28:44.720
our whole family was sick over the last like

00:28:44.720 --> 00:28:48.140
couple weeks and so lloyd will still ask for

00:28:48.140 --> 00:28:52.220
it now like use that use that all right no harm

00:28:52.220 --> 00:28:54.500
yeah i don't think it's gonna hurt you so yeah

00:28:54.500 --> 00:28:58.640
yeah yeah i think then another like fun thing

00:28:58.640 --> 00:29:03.380
with them is watching And I don't know if anyone

00:29:03.380 --> 00:29:05.240
could prepare me for how fun this is. It's just

00:29:05.240 --> 00:29:07.400
watching Lloyd and Zeta's relationship. Yeah.

00:29:07.640 --> 00:29:10.400
So fun. Yeah. Like I knew, you know, it was going

00:29:10.400 --> 00:29:12.180
to be cool to like see Lloyd become a sibling

00:29:12.180 --> 00:29:16.359
and all of that. But seeing like one thing that.

00:29:16.799 --> 00:29:19.359
lloyd does frequently is zeta will be sitting

00:29:19.359 --> 00:29:21.059
on the floor like eating a snack or drinking

00:29:21.059 --> 00:29:23.740
her milk and they usually have snacks at the

00:29:23.740 --> 00:29:25.460
same time and so he'll just like sit down next

00:29:25.460 --> 00:29:27.799
to her and they'll eat their snack and that's

00:29:27.799 --> 00:29:31.079
it and they just like are just hanging out together

00:29:31.079 --> 00:29:34.640
eating tractor wheels or smoothie balls or whatever

00:29:34.640 --> 00:29:39.160
so cute it's the best that is one of one of my

00:29:39.160 --> 00:29:41.019
favorite things that like i'm seeing develop

00:29:41.019 --> 00:29:46.289
especially with two boys like cole i know has

00:29:46.289 --> 00:29:48.450
been in desperate need of some roughhousing.

00:29:49.089 --> 00:29:53.029
And Cruz is finally... To the point where he

00:29:53.029 --> 00:29:54.990
kind of can. Where he kind of can. He can't really

00:29:54.990 --> 00:29:58.289
roughhouse back, but he can hold his own. And

00:29:58.289 --> 00:30:02.650
I think that's why God made him so broad, bulky.

00:30:03.009 --> 00:30:05.730
He's like, I know the energy I gave Colt. Yes.

00:30:05.809 --> 00:30:07.549
So his little brother's gonna... Here's some

00:30:07.549 --> 00:30:11.210
extra weight, buddy. And so Colt will... And

00:30:11.210 --> 00:30:13.190
I think I've talked about this before. Colt will

00:30:13.190 --> 00:30:15.450
literally go up behind him and like... headlock

00:30:15.450 --> 00:30:18.869
him and pull him down. And Cruz will usually

00:30:18.869 --> 00:30:21.609
laugh. Colt tried to do that to Lloyd the other

00:30:21.609 --> 00:30:23.390
day. Did he really? Oh, no. I guess that was

00:30:23.390 --> 00:30:26.829
yesterday. And Lloyd's like, what exactly? Yeah,

00:30:26.829 --> 00:30:28.250
Lloyd was like, no. And we're like, Lloyd, you

00:30:28.250 --> 00:30:30.690
can tell him to stop. No, thank you. If you don't

00:30:30.690 --> 00:30:32.549
want someone to do something, tell them not to

00:30:32.549 --> 00:30:34.930
do it. So, yeah, Lloyd, we have the opposite

00:30:34.930 --> 00:30:37.369
problem. We're like, buddy, you can tell people

00:30:37.369 --> 00:30:39.549
to leave you alone. That's so funny. Yeah, he's

00:30:39.549 --> 00:30:41.789
just like. I guess I'll just take this. I don't

00:30:41.789 --> 00:30:45.029
know. That's so funny. Yeah. So Colt doesn't

00:30:45.029 --> 00:30:47.769
quite know, obviously the context of like, yes,

00:30:47.869 --> 00:30:51.130
but I love seeing, I'm going to have to like,

00:30:51.170 --> 00:30:53.890
let it go a little bit. Like boys are meant for

00:30:53.890 --> 00:30:57.240
this rough play. I really think it's ingrained

00:30:57.240 --> 00:30:59.259
in them and really good for their development.

00:30:59.319 --> 00:31:02.799
But me, I'm like, oh, guys, don't get hurt. You

00:31:02.799 --> 00:31:06.000
guys need to play gentle. But Michael's like,

00:31:06.059 --> 00:31:09.299
no, they're going to get hurt. Yeah. When I actually

00:31:09.299 --> 00:31:13.059
just read something that said the number one

00:31:13.059 --> 00:31:16.539
activity, I guess, to help develop self -control

00:31:16.539 --> 00:31:19.920
is roughhousing specifically with dad because

00:31:19.920 --> 00:31:22.779
they see. dad's self -control and that like obviously

00:31:22.779 --> 00:31:25.740
a grown man could hurt a child very easily for

00:31:25.740 --> 00:31:28.920
sure but he doesn't and he like does it in a

00:31:28.920 --> 00:31:32.119
playful way and so they learn that from him so

00:31:32.119 --> 00:31:34.740
and that's like the number one indicator i don't

00:31:34.740 --> 00:31:36.799
know it's like yeah the number one thing that

00:31:36.799 --> 00:31:38.799
helps develop the self -control part of the brain

00:31:39.359 --> 00:31:42.640
which is fascinating. And then little boys just,

00:31:42.720 --> 00:31:44.859
they have, is that just for boys or for both?

00:31:44.940 --> 00:31:47.019
I think it's for all kids. So for boys and girls,

00:31:47.099 --> 00:31:50.420
but then just with how boys, with how men and

00:31:50.420 --> 00:31:54.819
women are just inherently boys, just, they need

00:31:54.819 --> 00:31:56.900
that a little bit more. And then, yeah, they

00:31:56.900 --> 00:31:59.700
have an energy. Yeah. Like. I mean, obviously

00:31:59.700 --> 00:32:01.980
Zeta's still little, but Stuart will roughhouse

00:32:01.980 --> 00:32:04.279
with her a little bit. Like, you know, he calls

00:32:04.279 --> 00:32:06.460
it a baby slammer. He like kind of slams her

00:32:06.460 --> 00:32:09.200
on the couch, you know, obviously in a gentle

00:32:09.200 --> 00:32:12.880
way. But I thought that was super interesting.

00:32:13.000 --> 00:32:15.660
That is very interesting. I could see how that

00:32:15.660 --> 00:32:18.819
could be true, like their development. But it

00:32:18.819 --> 00:32:22.559
has been so fun to see like the interaction happen

00:32:22.559 --> 00:32:25.900
and their love for each other. Like when Colt

00:32:25.900 --> 00:32:28.859
goes to hug Cruz and Cruz just like. just try

00:32:28.859 --> 00:32:31.740
and hug him back and kiss him. And I'm like,

00:32:31.759 --> 00:32:34.160
they're just, I'm starting to see that best friendship

00:32:34.160 --> 00:32:37.740
form, like you said, with your kids. And to just

00:32:37.740 --> 00:32:40.099
be able to have like a front row seat to that

00:32:40.099 --> 00:32:44.119
is the biggest blessing and so fun. And like

00:32:44.119 --> 00:32:46.960
every time that I see those little interactions,

00:32:47.019 --> 00:32:50.799
it literally makes me tear up. I just am like,

00:32:50.859 --> 00:32:53.859
oh, my gosh, like, thank you, Jesus, for my two

00:32:53.859 --> 00:32:56.759
little kids that I didn't know that I would be

00:32:56.759 --> 00:33:00.299
able to have. And how, like, amazing that I get

00:33:00.299 --> 00:33:04.240
to be front row to their relationship. It's also

00:33:04.240 --> 00:33:07.279
just super funny that anyone who has siblings,

00:33:07.440 --> 00:33:09.240
and I think I've said this before, but anyone

00:33:09.240 --> 00:33:13.440
who has siblings knows the sibling dynamic. I

00:33:13.440 --> 00:33:16.799
can be mean to you, but no one else can. Exactly.

00:33:16.940 --> 00:33:19.079
And like, I will get annoyed with you and push

00:33:19.079 --> 00:33:21.480
you around, but also I will still like protect

00:33:21.480 --> 00:33:24.619
you. And it's funny how quickly that happened.

00:33:24.680 --> 00:33:26.359
Like I knew that was going to happen at some

00:33:26.359 --> 00:33:30.480
point, but a lot of times during bedtime when

00:33:30.480 --> 00:33:33.740
they're both sitting in my lap for a book. Zeta

00:33:33.740 --> 00:33:35.299
will be like grabbing at Lloyd and he'll just

00:33:35.299 --> 00:33:38.839
like shove her. Like, don't love that. But also

00:33:38.839 --> 00:33:41.240
your sister's annoying you. So like, that's obviously

00:33:41.240 --> 00:33:44.140
what you're going to do. But then if she's crying,

00:33:44.259 --> 00:33:46.599
he's super upset and he like tries to comfort

00:33:46.599 --> 00:33:48.700
her and he'll like give her a kiss on the head

00:33:48.700 --> 00:33:52.299
and give her hugs. And one of the things we have

00:33:52.299 --> 00:33:56.059
to do every night for bedtime now is. I'll, like,

00:33:56.059 --> 00:33:57.920
get comfy with Zeta in the chair so I can nurse

00:33:57.920 --> 00:34:00.640
her. And she waits, and they shake hands. And

00:34:00.640 --> 00:34:02.619
they shake hands. They, like, grab each other's

00:34:02.619 --> 00:34:04.599
hands. I mean, not, like, a formal, like, business

00:34:04.599 --> 00:34:06.160
shake. Nice to meet you. But, like, they grab

00:34:06.160 --> 00:34:08.559
each other's hands, and they just, like, shake

00:34:08.559 --> 00:34:11.219
for a second. And it has to happen every night.

00:34:11.400 --> 00:34:14.679
And if it doesn't happen, is Lloyd, like, oh,

00:34:14.679 --> 00:34:17.719
no. Devastated. Yeah. Yeah. That's, like, Colt

00:34:17.719 --> 00:34:19.960
dropping Cruz off at kids ministry. Be brave.

00:34:20.119 --> 00:34:23.550
Be brave. And if we forget. He's losing it in

00:34:23.550 --> 00:34:27.409
the hallway of like, no, I need Cruz hug. Need

00:34:27.409 --> 00:34:29.510
a hug. So then we have to go back into the room,

00:34:29.710 --> 00:34:32.730
have them bring Cruz over. Sorry. Make Cruz's

00:34:32.730 --> 00:34:35.150
day harder. Yes. I know. Cause then Cruz is like,

00:34:35.289 --> 00:34:38.190
I'm confused. I already got dropped off and now

00:34:38.190 --> 00:34:42.889
I'm real confused. But you know, if we break

00:34:42.889 --> 00:34:45.809
the routine, like you gotta, you gotta keep it.

00:34:45.889 --> 00:34:49.329
But yeah, that relationship is just seeing that

00:34:49.329 --> 00:34:52.860
develop. It's the best. Is the most fun. probably

00:34:52.860 --> 00:34:55.019
has been the most fun part for me for the last

00:34:55.019 --> 00:34:58.260
year yeah and I'm just like even looking forward

00:34:58.260 --> 00:35:01.840
yes I'm like heartbroken that my youngest is

00:35:01.840 --> 00:35:04.360
will be one tomorrow technically when we're recording

00:35:04.360 --> 00:35:08.559
this when it's out he will be one but it's heartbreaking

00:35:08.559 --> 00:35:11.320
that oh my gosh I have a two one and a two -year

00:35:11.320 --> 00:35:15.159
-old now and where did the time go but now like

00:35:15.659 --> 00:35:18.000
to continue to see their relationship just like

00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:21.739
develop and how they're going to butt heads and

00:35:21.739 --> 00:35:24.179
like, you know, their personalities are going

00:35:24.179 --> 00:35:26.260
to clash versus like, what are the things they're

00:35:26.260 --> 00:35:29.579
going to like and do together? That is just really

00:35:29.579 --> 00:35:32.360
makes me excited for this next year. Yeah. I

00:35:32.360 --> 00:35:33.719
think this next year is going to be a lot of

00:35:33.719 --> 00:35:36.800
fun to, you know, with them getting older and

00:35:36.800 --> 00:35:40.659
actually caring about things. I know. I know.

00:35:40.719 --> 00:35:42.860
And I think as they're getting older, they're

00:35:42.860 --> 00:35:47.079
less and less like, dependent upon us which is

00:35:47.079 --> 00:35:50.340
one thing that i like selfishly kind of looked

00:35:50.340 --> 00:35:53.599
forward to not in all senses like i always want

00:35:53.599 --> 00:35:55.900
my kids to depend on me oh for sure but like

00:35:55.900 --> 00:35:59.239
you totally understand the like touched out yes

00:35:59.239 --> 00:36:02.900
sort of feeling and i'm sure the majority of

00:36:02.900 --> 00:36:05.239
moms if not all who listen to this have understood

00:36:05.239 --> 00:36:08.909
that at some point of just being like if anybody

00:36:08.909 --> 00:36:13.230
else touches me at all today, I'm going to lose

00:36:13.230 --> 00:36:16.550
it. I need five minutes where nothing touches

00:36:16.550 --> 00:36:19.550
me. Yes. And so I think that I'm excited a little

00:36:19.550 --> 00:36:22.110
bit for like that mindset to probably happen

00:36:22.110 --> 00:36:25.869
less and less. Yeah. And the more of the, like

00:36:25.869 --> 00:36:28.389
the independence. Yeah. And I think when the,

00:36:28.409 --> 00:36:31.510
some of that is like, as the independence starts

00:36:31.510 --> 00:36:34.349
to come. you get to do a lot of the fun things

00:36:34.349 --> 00:36:37.590
with it, right? Where it's like, oh, we go to

00:36:37.590 --> 00:36:40.510
a playground and I don't have to like hover behind

00:36:40.510 --> 00:36:42.510
you the whole time. Like I can still play with

00:36:42.510 --> 00:36:45.329
you and, you know, cheer you on going down the

00:36:45.329 --> 00:36:47.829
slide, but I'm not constantly worried that you're

00:36:47.829 --> 00:36:50.449
about to fall to your death. Yes. Or like, oh,

00:36:50.489 --> 00:36:52.909
maybe I'm really excited because Stuart and I

00:36:52.909 --> 00:36:55.190
love to play board games. And I know this is

00:36:55.190 --> 00:36:57.369
still a little while in the future. But just

00:36:57.369 --> 00:36:59.269
like getting to the point where it's like, oh,

00:36:59.389 --> 00:37:01.949
our Friday night, we can play a board game together.

00:37:01.989 --> 00:37:04.889
That's so fun. Yes. And yeah, that comes with

00:37:04.889 --> 00:37:07.190
a little bit of independence because they have

00:37:07.190 --> 00:37:11.030
to have to to do that kind of stuff. Yeah, that's

00:37:11.030 --> 00:37:13.010
so true. Going back to the playground thing.

00:37:13.150 --> 00:37:15.489
I don't know if you're like me. I have like irrational

00:37:15.489 --> 00:37:18.230
thoughts of like playgrounds are so dangerous.

00:37:18.869 --> 00:37:21.090
And they're safer than when we were kids. Yeah.

00:37:21.090 --> 00:37:23.889
Oh, yeah. But like every time Cole is climbing

00:37:23.889 --> 00:37:27.610
a ladder or like. Our playground near our house

00:37:27.610 --> 00:37:30.349
is like, I, there's no way it's up to code because

00:37:30.349 --> 00:37:33.929
I swear every single corner of that thing, you

00:37:33.929 --> 00:37:36.469
could fall 10 feet to the ground. And I'm like,

00:37:36.469 --> 00:37:40.469
just imagining the worst case scenario. But that

00:37:40.469 --> 00:37:43.250
was a little tangent of playgrounds. There's

00:37:43.250 --> 00:37:45.789
a couple of playgrounds we go to that definitely

00:37:45.789 --> 00:37:48.610
have that. There's one in particular that he

00:37:48.610 --> 00:37:52.780
loves and there's probably a like. six seven

00:37:52.780 --> 00:37:56.000
foot ladder that's like curved oh yeah and so

00:37:56.000 --> 00:37:58.360
it's one of those things where the last rung

00:37:58.360 --> 00:38:01.000
if he misses it like going from the rung to the

00:38:01.000 --> 00:38:05.800
playground you just like straight falls and yeah

00:38:05.800 --> 00:38:09.059
yeah how come that was like i mean never a thought

00:38:09.059 --> 00:38:11.340
in my mind as a kid growing up because that part

00:38:11.340 --> 00:38:15.119
of your brain isn't developed yeah but oh my

00:38:15.119 --> 00:38:17.900
gosh now i'm like everything colt climbs on i'm

00:38:17.900 --> 00:38:20.719
like let mommy help you let mommy help you yeah

00:38:20.719 --> 00:38:23.619
i try hard not to do that but it also depends

00:38:23.619 --> 00:38:26.320
on like what the ladder is and stuff like that

00:38:26.320 --> 00:38:28.340
because there's a few that i'm like oh no you

00:38:28.340 --> 00:38:30.900
got this because also if you fall you're not

00:38:30.900 --> 00:38:34.059
gonna get that badly hurt no actually i heard

00:38:34.059 --> 00:38:36.409
someone say the other day to let your kids get

00:38:36.409 --> 00:38:38.429
hurt, not injured. And I thought that was a really

00:38:38.429 --> 00:38:40.969
good way to like differentiate of like, yeah,

00:38:41.010 --> 00:38:42.329
they're going to fall and they're going to scrape

00:38:42.329 --> 00:38:43.909
their knees and there are going to be times where

00:38:43.909 --> 00:38:45.670
they're shaken up and they're a little bit scared

00:38:45.670 --> 00:38:48.309
and then pop back up and go down the slide again.

00:38:48.429 --> 00:38:51.650
And that's okay. It's the broken bones and concussions

00:38:51.650 --> 00:38:53.769
and the like serious injuries that you want to

00:38:53.769 --> 00:38:56.510
avoid. Yeah. It's like the doing dangerous things

00:38:56.510 --> 00:39:00.030
safely. Yes. Yes. Yeah. And that's like, like

00:39:00.030 --> 00:39:03.730
Cole is such a daredevil in that factor. I think

00:39:03.730 --> 00:39:06.739
Cruz is a little more. reserved and cautious

00:39:06.739 --> 00:39:11.039
where lloyd is very cautious he like he wants

00:39:11.039 --> 00:39:13.119
to stole his hand with a lot of things there

00:39:13.119 --> 00:39:15.079
are times when we have to kind of like prompt

00:39:15.079 --> 00:39:18.079
him like hey you can do that that's okay zeta

00:39:18.079 --> 00:39:21.559
goes down slides face first like on her belly

00:39:21.559 --> 00:39:25.199
head first just having the time of her life there's

00:39:25.199 --> 00:39:26.900
been a couple slides we've had to like catch

00:39:26.900 --> 00:39:29.489
her like That is an eight foot slide and no one

00:39:29.489 --> 00:39:30.909
is catching you at the bottom. So you can't just

00:39:30.909 --> 00:39:34.090
go for it, girl. You were going to face plant

00:39:34.090 --> 00:39:35.670
into some wood chips and it's going to be terrible.

00:39:36.289 --> 00:39:39.650
But yeah, she has no fear. I love that. Just

00:39:39.650 --> 00:39:43.769
goes for it, which is also super fun. But it's

00:39:43.769 --> 00:39:45.710
then interesting as a parent to be like, oh,

00:39:45.809 --> 00:39:48.789
I have to like encourage my kids in different

00:39:48.789 --> 00:39:51.849
ways in this. Lloyd, like we have to tell him

00:39:51.849 --> 00:39:55.010
you are brave and you can be brave and you can

00:39:55.010 --> 00:39:57.179
do scary things. Mazeta, we're going to have

00:39:57.179 --> 00:39:59.239
to be like, no, you need to be scared. Yeah.

00:39:59.300 --> 00:40:01.420
Please use the fear that God gave you because.

00:40:02.579 --> 00:40:04.739
Because you cannot jump off of that right now.

00:40:04.780 --> 00:40:07.679
Yes. We don't want you to break your whole body.

00:40:07.800 --> 00:40:10.000
Yeah. Oh, my gosh. That's so interesting being

00:40:10.000 --> 00:40:12.940
like. Your mind goes to, like, oh, the boy is

00:40:12.940 --> 00:40:14.519
going to be the daredevil. The girl is going

00:40:14.519 --> 00:40:16.960
to be a little more cautious and reserved. But

00:40:16.960 --> 00:40:18.679
it's interesting that your kids are kind of flipped

00:40:18.679 --> 00:40:20.480
in that sense. And I think part of it is because

00:40:20.480 --> 00:40:23.860
she has a big brother. Oh, yeah. It's not that

00:40:23.860 --> 00:40:26.199
he doesn't do things like that. Like, he jumps

00:40:26.199 --> 00:40:28.199
off our couch all the time. He likes to climb

00:40:28.199 --> 00:40:30.139
up onto the arm of the couch and then just, like.

00:40:30.650 --> 00:40:33.210
jump and face plant on the couch so she sees

00:40:33.210 --> 00:40:36.110
him do stuff like that and she doesn't see the

00:40:36.110 --> 00:40:39.030
like the fear that maybe he's like right or that

00:40:39.030 --> 00:40:40.969
he was scared the first time that he did it and

00:40:40.969 --> 00:40:43.510
now it's the thousandth time so he's not scared

00:40:43.510 --> 00:40:46.510
anymore yeah she just sees oh that big brother

00:40:46.510 --> 00:40:49.650
does that i'm gonna do that right yeah yeah and

00:40:49.650 --> 00:40:52.590
of course he can because he's two and a half

00:40:52.590 --> 00:40:56.849
and then she's Not. Barely won. Yeah. You need

00:40:56.849 --> 00:41:01.030
to start walking first. Yeah. This past year

00:41:01.030 --> 00:41:06.670
has been probably the hardest year for me. Just

00:41:06.670 --> 00:41:10.989
mentally, I mean, two kids is not, no walk in

00:41:10.989 --> 00:41:15.070
the park. Yeah. The balance with working and

00:41:15.070 --> 00:41:19.809
all the things is like very difficult. And I

00:41:19.809 --> 00:41:22.630
think that there's a lot of things that we have

00:41:22.630 --> 00:41:25.750
struggled with over the last year. Sleep is like

00:41:25.750 --> 00:41:28.210
not a thing in our house, which I've talked about

00:41:28.210 --> 00:41:32.389
probably in every single episode. But yeah, it's

00:41:32.389 --> 00:41:35.489
also been the best year of our lives. Legitimately,

00:41:35.710 --> 00:41:39.389
like if I could go back and live this year over

00:41:39.389 --> 00:41:42.449
again, I think I would in a heartbeat because

00:41:42.449 --> 00:41:46.989
it just was so special. And I feel like I wish

00:41:46.989 --> 00:41:49.409
I would have. taken in some of the moments a

00:41:49.409 --> 00:41:52.389
little bit more or like reflected on them a little

00:41:52.389 --> 00:41:54.789
bit more. Right before this, I just showed you

00:41:54.789 --> 00:41:57.590
like a reel that I made for Cruz's birthday that

00:41:57.590 --> 00:41:59.929
I'll probably post tomorrow for his birthday.

00:42:00.329 --> 00:42:03.469
And I just like, I'm like, where did the time

00:42:03.469 --> 00:42:06.170
go? Yeah. Like it just. I keep getting pictures

00:42:06.170 --> 00:42:09.349
from like Zeta's first few months. Yeah. And

00:42:09.349 --> 00:42:12.630
Zeta's at this point where I swear every day

00:42:12.630 --> 00:42:15.420
we wake up and she looks. six months older well

00:42:15.420 --> 00:42:17.159
yeah you guys were just at our house yesterday

00:42:17.159 --> 00:42:20.199
and i'm like i had seen her like a week ago or

00:42:20.199 --> 00:42:22.179
whatever and i'm like every time i see her i'm

00:42:22.179 --> 00:42:25.280
like she just looks like a little girl like more

00:42:25.280 --> 00:42:27.219
of a little girl like a baby anymore she just

00:42:27.219 --> 00:42:31.420
looks like a toddler yeah it's and it's like

00:42:31.420 --> 00:42:33.460
the best thing but it's also so heartbreaking

00:42:33.460 --> 00:42:36.760
because i'm like it's literally like in a blink

00:42:36.760 --> 00:42:38.679
of an eye yeah and then i see the picture of

00:42:38.679 --> 00:42:41.559
her four days old what happened and then do you

00:42:41.559 --> 00:42:43.880
feel like You can even remember that because

00:42:43.880 --> 00:42:45.980
to me, I'm like. It's such a blur. Yeah. I'm

00:42:45.980 --> 00:42:47.860
looking at these videos of Cruz and I'm like,

00:42:47.880 --> 00:42:51.840
no way were you that tiny. There's no way. And

00:42:51.840 --> 00:42:54.960
it just. I think about it sometimes because Zeta,

00:42:55.019 --> 00:42:57.719
when she was a baby, I rarely held her with two

00:42:57.719 --> 00:42:59.920
arms. Yeah. Part of that is because I had a two

00:42:59.920 --> 00:43:03.730
-year -old. 18 month old, but she was just, she

00:43:03.730 --> 00:43:05.469
was so tiny. She was born at five pounds, 12

00:43:05.469 --> 00:43:09.590
ounces. Like she was so tiny. And now like when

00:43:09.590 --> 00:43:11.909
I baby hold her, obviously she's much bigger.

00:43:12.030 --> 00:43:14.710
Yeah. And just thinking of how tiny she was and

00:43:14.710 --> 00:43:17.230
how much she's grown. I know. Well, yeah. When

00:43:17.230 --> 00:43:19.409
I was doing for Cruz's party, I did the like

00:43:19.409 --> 00:43:22.030
paper or whatever. That's like his birth stats

00:43:22.030 --> 00:43:24.510
versus like his stats now. And I'm like, okay,

00:43:24.530 --> 00:43:26.789
when he was born, he was 20 inches and now he's

00:43:26.789 --> 00:43:31.639
30 inches, like 10 inches tall. like in one year

00:43:31.639 --> 00:43:36.780
to grow 10 inches that's crazy it is and I mean

00:43:36.780 --> 00:43:39.260
it happens in front of you but you don't you

00:43:39.260 --> 00:43:41.920
don't realize whenever you're like you're in

00:43:41.920 --> 00:43:45.099
it every day I guess but yeah so also it's not

00:43:45.099 --> 00:43:47.300
like they grow 10 inches overnight no right it

00:43:47.300 --> 00:43:50.599
happens over time and like how did how did this

00:43:50.599 --> 00:43:54.480
happen yeah it's just wild and like makes me

00:43:54.480 --> 00:43:58.579
want to just do it all over again. So yeah. Any

00:43:58.579 --> 00:44:01.280
other thoughts you have towards the last year?

00:44:01.400 --> 00:44:03.980
Not specifically. No. Yeah. I mean, like you

00:44:03.980 --> 00:44:06.659
said, it's been so fun and it's also been really,

00:44:06.760 --> 00:44:11.099
really hard. Yeah. That, that 18, 19 month age

00:44:11.099 --> 00:44:13.920
gap is. It's not for the faint of heart. No,

00:44:14.039 --> 00:44:17.199
it's rough. Cause your oldest is still a baby.

00:44:17.320 --> 00:44:19.920
Yeah. In so many ways. And they don't, at least

00:44:19.920 --> 00:44:22.940
for Cole. Like it was like a really hard transition

00:44:22.940 --> 00:44:26.340
for him of just like, yeah, you, I can imagine

00:44:26.340 --> 00:44:29.480
like you have all of our attention all of the

00:44:29.480 --> 00:44:31.219
time. And then you have, and now you have almost

00:44:31.219 --> 00:44:34.599
none. Especially at first. Yeah. Yeah. Those

00:44:34.599 --> 00:44:37.000
were the things that made me cry so much when,

00:44:37.039 --> 00:44:40.650
like right after having Cruz was like. When I

00:44:40.650 --> 00:44:42.710
couldn't give Colt the attention that he needed.

00:44:42.889 --> 00:44:46.730
Yeah. That was heartbreaking to me. But now we

00:44:46.730 --> 00:44:48.730
get to see kind of like the fruit of that as

00:44:48.730 --> 00:44:50.909
their relationships develop. And you get to do

00:44:50.909 --> 00:44:54.710
things like all together. Yes. And yeah, I think

00:44:54.710 --> 00:44:58.030
even now, and this will probably never go away.

00:44:58.090 --> 00:44:59.949
And if we have more kids, it'll get harder is.

00:45:00.920 --> 00:45:03.619
not wanting either of them or any of our kids

00:45:03.619 --> 00:45:05.820
to feel like i'm choosing one over the other

00:45:05.820 --> 00:45:07.519
when the fact of the matter is sometimes you're

00:45:07.519 --> 00:45:11.340
i'm gonna have to and i'm to the for me there

00:45:11.340 --> 00:45:13.079
gets to the point where it's definitely overthinking

00:45:13.079 --> 00:45:15.920
like okay you both want to read a book you want

00:45:15.920 --> 00:45:17.519
to read different books which one do i choose

00:45:17.519 --> 00:45:20.460
first yeah oh my gosh yeah and like that's such

00:45:20.460 --> 00:45:23.619
a silly thing that like last time i chose lloyd's

00:45:23.619 --> 00:45:25.519
book first so right this time i'm gonna choose

00:45:25.519 --> 00:45:28.780
like yeah for bedtime we kind of have every other

00:45:28.780 --> 00:45:31.230
day thing like Lloyd gets to pick a book one

00:45:31.230 --> 00:45:32.929
day and then Zeta gets to pick a book the other

00:45:32.929 --> 00:45:34.849
day. And some days Zeta doesn't care. So then

00:45:34.849 --> 00:45:36.869
Lloyd gets to pick it two days in a row. But

00:45:36.869 --> 00:45:38.730
yeah, when you both bring me a book on the couch

00:45:38.730 --> 00:45:41.050
and both want to read it, like, is this going

00:45:41.050 --> 00:45:43.619
to be the reason that you think? I love your

00:45:43.619 --> 00:45:46.199
sibling more than you. And I'm sure that's not

00:45:46.199 --> 00:45:48.860
true. Um, you know, obviously if it was like

00:45:48.860 --> 00:45:51.460
every single time you're choosing one over the

00:45:51.460 --> 00:45:53.519
other, that's going to build things. But you

00:45:53.519 --> 00:45:57.119
know, these little moments, you know, cause obviously

00:45:57.119 --> 00:45:58.719
there are times when I do have to take care of

00:45:58.719 --> 00:46:00.079
Zeta first and there are times when I do have

00:46:00.079 --> 00:46:02.159
to take care of Floyd first. Yeah. But yeah,

00:46:02.199 --> 00:46:04.460
it's just so easy to like get in your head about,

00:46:04.579 --> 00:46:07.619
Oh yeah. I feel that. How are they going to perceive

00:46:07.619 --> 00:46:12.199
this? Oh, I feel that 100%. Yep. there are those

00:46:12.199 --> 00:46:14.739
little thoughts that go through my mind all of

00:46:14.739 --> 00:46:17.639
the time. Like for us, it's Michael pretty much

00:46:17.639 --> 00:46:20.300
puts Colt to bed every night because I have to,

00:46:20.320 --> 00:46:23.119
I nurse Cruz, like kind of same -ish situation

00:46:23.119 --> 00:46:26.039
as you guys. Like, and then sometimes Colt's

00:46:26.039 --> 00:46:29.400
like, no mama, mommy lay with me. Mommy go sleep

00:46:29.400 --> 00:46:32.659
with me. And I'm like, Oh buddy, I'm so sorry.

00:46:32.719 --> 00:46:34.980
Daddy's going to lay with you because mommy has

00:46:34.980 --> 00:46:37.900
to feed Cruz. Yeah. And like, he gets so sad

00:46:37.900 --> 00:46:39.960
with that sometimes. And it's just heartbreaking.

00:46:40.199 --> 00:46:43.389
Cause I'm like, It's not that I'm choosing him

00:46:43.389 --> 00:46:46.869
over you. It's just like the situation that I

00:46:46.869 --> 00:46:49.090
can't. This is his nature. I can't explain it

00:46:49.090 --> 00:46:51.769
to you right now, but I hope that you understand.

00:46:51.849 --> 00:46:54.130
Understand as much as you can. Yeah. Yeah. I

00:46:54.130 --> 00:46:56.610
think, I don't know if this actually helped in

00:46:56.610 --> 00:47:00.630
any way, but at one point I told Lloyd that I

00:47:00.630 --> 00:47:03.750
nursed him when he was little too. Yeah. And

00:47:03.750 --> 00:47:07.349
he's brought that up. Uh -huh. The way he says

00:47:07.349 --> 00:47:11.760
it is. Lloyd ate mom's boob when he was a little

00:47:11.760 --> 00:47:15.920
baby like Zeta. You're like, well, yeah, I guess.

00:47:16.280 --> 00:47:20.420
You're not totally wrong. And I don't know if

00:47:20.420 --> 00:47:24.360
that helped him understand. She's not getting

00:47:24.360 --> 00:47:27.260
special treatment necessarily. It's just different

00:47:27.260 --> 00:47:30.159
because you're older. I tell myself that helps

00:47:30.159 --> 00:47:31.539
him. Yeah, that's a good idea. I'll have to try

00:47:31.539 --> 00:47:33.539
that. Because he's also vocalized it, which is

00:47:33.539 --> 00:47:35.539
part of why I'm like, oh, maybe you do actually

00:47:35.539 --> 00:47:40.460
understand that she's little. and needs something

00:47:40.460 --> 00:47:44.039
different. But you also got that when you were

00:47:44.039 --> 00:47:47.059
little. You might not remember it, but I gave

00:47:47.059 --> 00:47:48.579
you this treatment when you were little, and

00:47:48.579 --> 00:47:50.760
you're just seeing it for your sister now. Yeah,

00:47:50.760 --> 00:47:52.579
no, that's really good. I should try that because,

00:47:52.659 --> 00:47:56.559
I mean, I know Colt understands. He understands

00:47:56.559 --> 00:47:58.579
way more than I think. Oh, for sure. There are

00:47:58.579 --> 00:48:00.840
so many things Lloyd has started to say that

00:48:00.840 --> 00:48:03.099
we're like, oh, you understand everything right

00:48:03.099 --> 00:48:07.050
now. Yeah, or things he'll just pick up on. The

00:48:07.050 --> 00:48:10.769
recall he has is so good. He was just telling

00:48:10.769 --> 00:48:13.789
us at the party yesterday. He was telling us

00:48:13.789 --> 00:48:18.710
about, I think it was Christmas, when, maybe

00:48:18.710 --> 00:48:21.010
I have my dates wrong, but because you told this

00:48:21.010 --> 00:48:25.010
story, when your stepdad's a garbage man, garbage

00:48:25.010 --> 00:48:28.909
papa, trash papa. Trash truck papa. Yeah. he

00:48:28.909 --> 00:48:31.530
went in the trash truck and played with it. And

00:48:31.530 --> 00:48:34.190
then he said, bye Papa. Yes. Like he told us

00:48:34.190 --> 00:48:35.929
that whole story at the party yesterday. I was

00:48:35.929 --> 00:48:38.690
like, that happened so long ago. Cause I remember

00:48:38.690 --> 00:48:40.650
you telling us about it. That was a long time

00:48:40.650 --> 00:48:42.769
ago. It was not, it was before Christmas because

00:48:42.769 --> 00:48:45.349
Christmas was, Christmas was Pootmageddon. Yeah.

00:48:45.530 --> 00:48:48.730
So it was like last summer or something like

00:48:48.730 --> 00:48:51.389
that. Yeah. I remember. Yeah. Yeah. That. Yeah.

00:48:51.429 --> 00:48:54.530
And Lloyd is the same thing. We, the other day

00:48:54.530 --> 00:48:57.630
he was like, Lloyd went to Spider -Man's house.

00:48:58.159 --> 00:48:59.960
We're like, what are you talking about? We're

00:48:59.960 --> 00:49:02.039
going to Spider -Man's house. And then we remembered

00:49:02.039 --> 00:49:04.079
for Halloween, we went to a friend's house and

00:49:04.079 --> 00:49:05.539
one of the kids was dressed like Spider -Man.

00:49:05.619 --> 00:49:07.539
Oh, yeah. And we're like, oh, you were talking

00:49:07.539 --> 00:49:09.739
about the Halloween party in October. That's

00:49:09.739 --> 00:49:11.760
so cool. It talks about Halloween all the time.

00:49:11.780 --> 00:49:13.760
There must be something about Halloween. I mean,

00:49:13.820 --> 00:49:17.139
I guess it's pretty cool. You're getting candy.

00:49:17.340 --> 00:49:20.920
So it's like definitely has some specific memories

00:49:20.920 --> 00:49:23.400
to it. But it's so funny. Like the things that.

00:49:23.659 --> 00:49:26.340
he brings up, I'm like, how do you remember that?

00:49:26.400 --> 00:49:29.000
It's the most random things. There's like the

00:49:29.000 --> 00:49:31.639
sadness of he remembers when our dog died and

00:49:31.639 --> 00:49:34.380
recalls that story. And you were like, that was

00:49:34.380 --> 00:49:36.219
the one I was hoping. Yeah. I'm like, I really

00:49:36.219 --> 00:49:38.719
hope that wasn't one of your core memories here,

00:49:38.840 --> 00:49:42.019
but I'm like, that's, that happened almost a

00:49:42.019 --> 00:49:44.920
year ago too. And I'm like that he wasn't even

00:49:44.920 --> 00:49:48.800
two at that point and remembering those things.

00:49:49.000 --> 00:49:52.630
But all that to say, I think. our kids are so

00:49:52.630 --> 00:49:54.849
much smarter than we even know. Oh, for sure.

00:49:54.929 --> 00:49:57.889
And their memory is so much better than we can

00:49:57.889 --> 00:50:01.510
even imagine. And so I need to try that because

00:50:01.510 --> 00:50:05.989
I don't want him to feel like I'm like pushing

00:50:05.989 --> 00:50:10.230
him away in any sense. Yeah. I guess two nights

00:50:10.230 --> 00:50:13.389
ago was super rough. And well, Zeta woke up at

00:50:13.389 --> 00:50:16.610
three and then did not fall back asleep till

00:50:16.610 --> 00:50:20.389
after five. And it wasn't like constant. but

00:50:20.389 --> 00:50:23.170
at one point within that lloyd woke up and stewart

00:50:23.170 --> 00:50:26.570
was gonna go try to like comfort him and then

00:50:26.570 --> 00:50:28.530
both kids started crying so we both went in there

00:50:28.530 --> 00:50:32.590
and lloyd asked for me which he never does like

00:50:32.590 --> 00:50:34.230
if we give him a choice like do you want mom

00:50:34.230 --> 00:50:36.610
or dad to do to put on your shoes to take you

00:50:36.610 --> 00:50:39.969
upstairs to do whatever it's always dad um which

00:50:39.969 --> 00:50:42.329
on one hand is kind of nice because then it's

00:50:42.329 --> 00:50:44.530
like okay when i am choosing zeta because of

00:50:44.530 --> 00:50:47.980
situations like breastfeeding then at least he's

00:50:47.980 --> 00:50:50.340
with the parent that he already requested but

00:50:50.340 --> 00:50:53.039
then there is times where it's like i work so

00:50:53.039 --> 00:50:55.579
hard every day like i mean you know where it's

00:50:55.579 --> 00:50:58.239
like you feel like the less favorite parent yes

00:50:58.239 --> 00:51:00.679
because yeah oh yeah you're like i'm the one

00:51:00.679 --> 00:51:03.559
that work i make all the meals i do all the things

00:51:03.559 --> 00:51:07.500
i do with all the tantrums so it was like not

00:51:07.500 --> 00:51:10.769
the ideal timing yeah To be fair, because it

00:51:10.769 --> 00:51:12.369
was 5 a .m. and I had been up for two hours.

00:51:12.610 --> 00:51:15.849
Were you like, okay, I can do this? Yeah, finally

00:51:15.849 --> 00:51:19.710
I brought him in bed with me. So Stuart took

00:51:19.710 --> 00:51:23.489
Zeta. And is she usually fine when you pass her

00:51:23.489 --> 00:51:27.130
off to dad? They went and slept on the couch

00:51:27.130 --> 00:51:29.659
and that got her back. I think got her back to

00:51:29.659 --> 00:51:32.139
sleep for a little bit. Yeah. And then I took

00:51:32.139 --> 00:51:34.480
Lloyd in bed with me and he did end up going

00:51:34.480 --> 00:51:36.960
back in his crib. But I think like he really

00:51:36.960 --> 00:51:39.519
liked just like snuggling close for a few minutes,

00:51:39.559 --> 00:51:41.940
which is funny because every night after dad

00:51:41.940 --> 00:51:44.940
snuggles, I like offered to snuggle and he's

00:51:44.940 --> 00:51:48.280
not like, mom, no, mom, no, I'm ready to go to

00:51:48.280 --> 00:51:51.239
bed. No, usually he just wants dad still. Oh,

00:51:51.239 --> 00:51:55.739
okay. It's fine. I'm not crying. I'm fine. It

00:51:55.739 --> 00:51:56.900
doesn't hurt my feelings at all. I didn't birth

00:51:56.900 --> 00:52:00.139
you or anything. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I feel like

00:52:00.139 --> 00:52:02.380
we've gone on a huge tangent here. Yeah, this

00:52:02.380 --> 00:52:05.480
has been a very tangential episode. Tangential.

00:52:05.579 --> 00:52:08.340
Love that word. But, yeah, hopefully you guys

00:52:08.340 --> 00:52:11.420
listening have, you know, connected to this in

00:52:11.420 --> 00:52:13.900
some sense, whether you still have littles, maybe

00:52:13.900 --> 00:52:17.820
your kids are grown up, but hopefully you can,

00:52:17.820 --> 00:52:20.639
yeah, reflect a little bit of... their first

00:52:20.639 --> 00:52:24.320
years of life and maybe the hardship that you

00:52:24.320 --> 00:52:26.780
went through balancing two if you have two or

00:52:26.780 --> 00:52:30.639
more kids. But, you know, we take all the advice

00:52:30.639 --> 00:52:35.099
that you guys might have towards raising little

00:52:35.099 --> 00:52:38.480
ones. Yeah, especially this two year, two to

00:52:38.480 --> 00:52:43.460
three is rough for sure. Yeah. Well, do you want

00:52:43.460 --> 00:52:46.380
to share your win of the week? Sure. I told you

00:52:46.380 --> 00:52:48.340
a little bit about this before we started, but.

00:52:48.860 --> 00:52:51.739
So for anyone who doesn't know, Lloyd loves cars,

00:52:51.900 --> 00:52:55.260
specifically the movie cars, but cars in general.

00:52:55.539 --> 00:52:58.920
And we found, I actually saw this on Instagram

00:52:58.920 --> 00:53:01.019
at one point in time. And then my neighbor reminded

00:53:01.019 --> 00:53:05.840
me of it. There is a gas station outside of Boulder

00:53:05.840 --> 00:53:09.360
that they just have some old cars that they have

00:53:09.360 --> 00:53:11.739
two monster trucks. I don't know if they're like,

00:53:11.840 --> 00:53:14.420
they have at least the like legit monster truck

00:53:14.420 --> 00:53:16.179
tires. And then I don't know if the trucks themselves

00:53:16.179 --> 00:53:18.199
are like. technically or if they're just like

00:53:18.199 --> 00:53:20.360
truck bodies and then they have a couple cars

00:53:20.360 --> 00:53:23.760
that they've painted like lightning mcqueen amazing

00:53:23.760 --> 00:53:27.760
and i had again i had seen this online but i

00:53:27.760 --> 00:53:29.739
didn't realize it's like 20 minutes away from

00:53:29.739 --> 00:53:32.900
us it's super close yeah so we just went and

00:53:32.900 --> 00:53:34.960
saw that this morning we drove 20 minutes to

00:53:34.960 --> 00:53:37.460
a gas station stewart went in and bought something

00:53:37.460 --> 00:53:39.139
to make sure they didn't like get mad that we

00:53:39.139 --> 00:53:41.539
were just there for the cars he's like yeah i

00:53:41.539 --> 00:53:45.119
can buy a red bull it's fine yeah yeah and lloyd

00:53:45.119 --> 00:53:47.800
just loved it And it's one of those things where

00:53:47.800 --> 00:53:50.960
we keep reminding ourselves, we're like, there's

00:53:50.960 --> 00:53:54.099
going to be a day when he doesn't love Lightning

00:53:54.099 --> 00:53:56.340
McQueen anymore. And I'm going to cry. It's going

00:53:56.340 --> 00:53:59.980
to be devastating. So right now, like, let's

00:53:59.980 --> 00:54:02.780
just have fun with it and buy him all the Lightning

00:54:02.780 --> 00:54:06.980
McQueen t -shirts. And go drive just to go to

00:54:06.980 --> 00:54:09.480
a gas station so that he can feel like he saw

00:54:09.480 --> 00:54:12.840
the real live Lightning McQueen. And it was just

00:54:12.840 --> 00:54:16.420
so fun because he got so excited and he gets

00:54:16.420 --> 00:54:18.739
this like goofy little face when he's excited

00:54:18.739 --> 00:54:21.579
where it's almost like he's bashful. Yeah. And

00:54:21.579 --> 00:54:23.380
it was just like a fun thing to do this morning.

00:54:23.480 --> 00:54:26.579
Oh, I love that. Yeah. I don't know if he'll

00:54:26.579 --> 00:54:28.440
ever remember it, but we definitely will. And

00:54:28.440 --> 00:54:32.300
that's so sweet. It is the best when your kids

00:54:32.300 --> 00:54:36.000
like gravitate towards something. um okay my

00:54:36.000 --> 00:54:40.719
win so we went on a cruise this last week or

00:54:40.719 --> 00:54:43.960
like a week or so ago now with my side of the

00:54:43.960 --> 00:54:46.940
family that's why I missed last week's episode

00:54:46.940 --> 00:54:50.199
of the podcast but so we just had such good like

00:54:50.199 --> 00:54:53.920
family memories to and obviously like who knows

00:54:53.920 --> 00:54:57.079
if our kids will remember it but one of our port

00:54:57.079 --> 00:55:00.900
stops was in Honduras and we went to like a a

00:55:00.900 --> 00:55:03.860
monkey like oh yeah you shared some pictures

00:55:03.860 --> 00:55:07.760
yes I did on my social media but I imagine it

00:55:07.760 --> 00:55:09.980
to be like we were gonna be like in an enclosed

00:55:09.980 --> 00:55:12.619
area and like monkeys are gonna be like running

00:55:12.619 --> 00:55:15.300
all around we were like no we were like legit

00:55:15.300 --> 00:55:18.860
in the in the forest and these monkeys are like

00:55:18.860 --> 00:55:22.139
they've kind of trained these monkeys but they

00:55:22.139 --> 00:55:25.019
just like let these monkeys like jump all over

00:55:25.019 --> 00:55:27.480
us and like we weren't allowed to like pet them

00:55:27.480 --> 00:55:30.099
because I guess that like frightens them but

00:55:30.539 --> 00:55:33.039
they just like would jump from like head to head

00:55:33.039 --> 00:55:36.019
and try to steal your sunglasses, put them, try

00:55:36.019 --> 00:55:39.440
to put them on. But Cole Cruz actually hated

00:55:39.440 --> 00:55:42.400
it, which is not part of the win. He was like

00:55:42.400 --> 00:55:44.559
in the carrier and a monkey like jumped on his

00:55:44.559 --> 00:55:48.199
head and he just like lost it. Yeah. That might

00:55:48.199 --> 00:55:50.000
be a little bit totally understandable. They're

00:55:50.000 --> 00:55:52.159
probably like twice his size. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

00:55:52.219 --> 00:55:54.920
Yeah. But at one point, so like Colt was loving

00:55:54.920 --> 00:55:59.030
it so much. But since like these monkeys are

00:55:59.030 --> 00:56:01.449
jumping from head to head, there was one monkey

00:56:01.449 --> 00:56:03.610
that like was on my sister's head or something

00:56:03.610 --> 00:56:06.909
like that. And then like in order to get to Michael,

00:56:07.070 --> 00:56:09.909
like jumped on Colt's head. And then like because

00:56:09.909 --> 00:56:12.889
Michael was holding Colt. And Colt just like

00:56:12.889 --> 00:56:16.130
started crying. It was so sad because it frightened

00:56:16.130 --> 00:56:18.869
him so badly. And then Michael like looked at

00:56:18.869 --> 00:56:21.510
him and was like, oh, buddy, wasn't that so fun?

00:56:21.590 --> 00:56:24.369
That was so cool. And Colt just turned it around

00:56:24.369 --> 00:56:27.199
and started laughing. And it just was like such

00:56:27.199 --> 00:56:31.380
a quick like low, low to like a high, like this

00:56:31.380 --> 00:56:34.760
is the best thing ever emotion. And it just was

00:56:34.760 --> 00:56:37.000
like, that was probably the highlight of the

00:56:37.000 --> 00:56:39.340
whole trip for me, you know, dealing with these

00:56:39.340 --> 00:56:42.780
crazy monkeys. But it just was like such an out

00:56:42.780 --> 00:56:46.559
of the box like experience that any of us had

00:56:46.559 --> 00:56:50.360
ever had. And it just, yeah, it was super fun

00:56:50.360 --> 00:56:53.260
overall. Like we ate way too much ice cream.

00:56:53.480 --> 00:56:57.730
Of course. way too much sugar and there were

00:56:57.730 --> 00:57:01.170
definitely like lows to the whole trip like bedtime

00:57:01.170 --> 00:57:04.309
was actually a disaster every single night perfect

00:57:04.309 --> 00:57:08.610
but like the positives of this whole trip like

00:57:08.610 --> 00:57:11.329
outweighed all the the negatives and that's so

00:57:11.329 --> 00:57:13.869
great yeah it was a super fun time but i love

00:57:13.869 --> 00:57:16.960
that yeah Yeah, well, thanks for listening today,

00:57:17.139 --> 00:57:20.139
guys. Hopefully, yeah, it helps you just reflect

00:57:20.139 --> 00:57:23.860
on your kiddos' lives. And we, yeah, we hope

00:57:23.860 --> 00:57:26.460
that you got something out of it. Follow us on

00:57:26.460 --> 00:57:30.099
social media at nomanualpodcast. Let us know

00:57:30.099 --> 00:57:32.360
what you want to hear in the future. And we'll

00:57:32.360 --> 00:57:34.679
see you next week. We'll see you next week. Well,

00:57:34.820 --> 00:57:37.989
that's enough oversharing for today. If you enjoyed

00:57:37.989 --> 00:57:40.090
hanging out with us, hit subscribe so you don't

00:57:40.090 --> 00:57:43.050
miss the next round of chaos. And if you're listening

00:57:43.050 --> 00:57:44.750
while hiding in the bathroom from your kids,

00:57:44.909 --> 00:57:47.469
no judgment, we see you. Thanks for joining us

00:57:47.469 --> 00:57:50.949
on No Manual Momcast, where motherhood is messy.

00:57:51.349 --> 00:58:10.699
At least we can laugh about it together. Chocolate

00:58:10.699 --> 00:58:12.179
chip cookie. That's so cute.