WEBVTT 00:00:15.700 --> 00:00:17.760 Motherhood, where sleep is a rumor and laundry 00:00:17.760 --> 00:00:20.280 is eternal. And somehow, we're supposed to be 00:00:20.280 --> 00:00:22.739 raising tiny humans through it all. We're here 00:00:22.739 --> 00:00:25.600 to laugh at the chaos, cry when necessary, and 00:00:25.600 --> 00:00:27.839 remind you that none of us actually know what 00:00:27.839 --> 00:00:30.960 we're doing. This is No Manual, a momcast. Your 00:00:30.960 --> 00:00:32.880 mom friend group chat, but with microphones. 00:00:33.299 --> 00:00:36.560 Well, welcome back to No Manual, a momcast. This 00:00:36.560 --> 00:00:38.179 week, I don't know if this is the best or the 00:00:38.179 --> 00:00:41.479 worst week for us to record this episode. So 00:00:41.479 --> 00:00:44.310 we're talking about... Kind of like what we miss 00:00:44.310 --> 00:00:48.170 about pre -kids or I don't know if miss is the 00:00:48.170 --> 00:00:51.070 right word. Yeah. Kind of just like that, like 00:00:51.070 --> 00:00:53.130 pre -kids versus post -kids, things that are 00:00:53.130 --> 00:00:56.299 harder now, which I think is like. a little bit 00:00:56.299 --> 00:00:58.820 of a hot topic sometimes. I don't know. This 00:00:58.820 --> 00:01:00.740 is a little bit of a tangent, I guess. But I 00:01:00.740 --> 00:01:02.920 feel like with other things in life, you're like 00:01:02.920 --> 00:01:05.519 allowed to miss, you know, like if you're married, 00:01:05.599 --> 00:01:07.420 you're allowed to miss aspects of being single. 00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:10.980 And it's kind of understandable or that kind 00:01:10.980 --> 00:01:12.799 of stuff. You're allowed to miss your college 00:01:12.799 --> 00:01:15.200 age or college years or whatever. But as soon 00:01:15.200 --> 00:01:17.480 as you're like, I'm a mom. And sometimes I miss 00:01:17.480 --> 00:01:19.640 like not being a mom. It's like, how could you? 00:01:19.659 --> 00:01:22.340 Do you hate your children? Which of course is 00:01:22.340 --> 00:01:25.400 not it. But before we jump into that, Do you 00:01:25.400 --> 00:01:27.239 want to share your mom moment of the week? Yes. 00:01:27.640 --> 00:01:29.939 Okay. So I feel like I've been telling a lot 00:01:29.939 --> 00:01:33.120 of stories about Colt lately and, but Colt is 00:01:33.120 --> 00:01:36.079 just like such, he's just at that age where it's 00:01:36.079 --> 00:01:40.560 like super unpredictable and just so, it's so 00:01:40.560 --> 00:01:44.260 fun. And also, yeah, it can be extra hard too. 00:01:44.459 --> 00:01:47.920 So this last week it was a Wednesday night, which 00:01:47.920 --> 00:01:50.120 is the night that Michael's at youth group. So 00:01:50.120 --> 00:01:54.060 I'm solo parenting. And when we brush teeth at 00:01:54.060 --> 00:01:56.540 night, Like Cruz is in the bathroom. I usually 00:01:56.540 --> 00:01:58.700 just hand him a toothbrush and he's just kind 00:01:58.700 --> 00:02:00.819 of like chewing on it or whatever. And Cole, 00:02:00.900 --> 00:02:03.640 I'm like actually brushing his teeth. And while 00:02:03.640 --> 00:02:06.000 I was brushing his teeth, I was like, Cole, like 00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.319 I saw this like trend on Instagram where it's 00:02:08.319 --> 00:02:10.819 like rather than just saying like you're such 00:02:10.819 --> 00:02:13.900 a good boy or like I love being a mom. It's like, 00:02:13.900 --> 00:02:17.240 no, I love being your mom. And so I told him 00:02:17.240 --> 00:02:19.900 that. I was like, Cole, did you know? that I 00:02:19.900 --> 00:02:22.759 love being your mom. And being your mom is the 00:02:22.759 --> 00:02:25.479 best thing in the world. And he stops, looks 00:02:25.479 --> 00:02:28.840 at me, and slaps me across the face. And I said, 00:02:28.939 --> 00:02:32.060 all right, cool. I feel like that is just... 00:02:32.360 --> 00:02:34.900 A description of this week. Yeah. Like we had 00:02:34.900 --> 00:02:38.180 a terrible week. I feel like you also had a not 00:02:38.180 --> 00:02:41.860 great week. Yeah. Yeah. Just extra hard. I don't 00:02:41.860 --> 00:02:44.919 know. Yes. Things are hard. My boss told us that 00:02:44.919 --> 00:02:47.020 Mercury was in retrograde this week, which usually 00:02:47.020 --> 00:02:49.099 I don't like super buy into that stuff. But then 00:02:49.099 --> 00:02:51.240 stuff like this happens where I'm like, my kids 00:02:51.240 --> 00:02:53.919 were absolutely losing it. And so was I. So maybe 00:02:53.919 --> 00:02:56.539 there is like. Or like the full moon thing where 00:02:56.539 --> 00:02:58.159 it's like, oh, it's a full moon. I swear there's 00:02:58.159 --> 00:02:59.800 something with full moons. I've worked with kids 00:02:59.800 --> 00:03:03.629 forever. And anytime there's a full moon, kids 00:03:03.629 --> 00:03:07.389 are crazy. Yeah. I mean, there's scientific proof 00:03:07.389 --> 00:03:10.409 like hospitals, like the ER is like way more 00:03:10.409 --> 00:03:13.169 full when it's a full moon. Yeah. So like something 00:03:13.169 --> 00:03:15.370 about like the moon and the planets for sure 00:03:15.370 --> 00:03:18.430 affect us. I don't know how, but who knows. Yeah. 00:03:18.530 --> 00:03:22.189 But yeah, fun times. Okay. My mom moment is, 00:03:22.430 --> 00:03:25.620 so we're. We're trying to wean Zeta and get her 00:03:25.620 --> 00:03:28.340 on whole milk. Of course, a big part of the problem 00:03:28.340 --> 00:03:31.840 is we don't bottle feed her. She's pretty much 00:03:31.840 --> 00:03:33.960 exclusively breastfed unless she's not with me. 00:03:35.659 --> 00:03:37.840 She's fine taking whole milk from other people 00:03:37.840 --> 00:03:41.099 or when I'm not home, when she's at someone else's 00:03:41.099 --> 00:03:43.659 house. But it's when I'm here and she's with 00:03:43.659 --> 00:03:46.080 me that she's like, absolutely not. But also 00:03:46.080 --> 00:03:48.860 my supply has gone down to the point where she's 00:03:48.860 --> 00:03:51.360 not getting full. So we're like, no, girl, you 00:03:51.360 --> 00:03:53.560 got to start taking the whole milk so you can 00:03:53.560 --> 00:03:56.379 sleep through the night and be satiated, all 00:03:56.379 --> 00:03:58.520 that. But yesterday for nap time, I was like, 00:03:58.620 --> 00:04:00.400 okay, I'm going to try to give her a bottle of 00:04:00.400 --> 00:04:03.240 whole milk and see if she'll take it from me. 00:04:04.620 --> 00:04:06.979 and so like she's in her sleep sack we're all 00:04:06.979 --> 00:04:09.460 snuggling she's on the boppy and i like have 00:04:09.460 --> 00:04:11.560 the bottle and i'm trying to feed it to her and 00:04:11.560 --> 00:04:16.040 she aggressively swats it away like very clear 00:04:16.040 --> 00:04:18.740 she is not taking this bottle and then she points 00:04:18.740 --> 00:04:24.339 to my boob and says have have mom get this out 00:04:24.339 --> 00:04:28.279 of here yes she so there was no questioning what 00:04:28.279 --> 00:04:30.560 she wanted in that moment which like on one hand 00:04:30.560 --> 00:04:33.100 is nice she wasn't just crying she made it very 00:04:33.100 --> 00:04:35.560 clear yeah that she was not taking that dang 00:04:35.560 --> 00:04:38.579 bottle and she was taking the boob and that was 00:04:38.579 --> 00:04:43.779 the only option but just like the sass and it's 00:04:43.779 --> 00:04:45.560 like mom i don't want this i want this stuff 00:04:45.560 --> 00:04:47.660 right off the tap yes i mean i need the good 00:04:47.660 --> 00:04:51.000 good like oh my gosh cruise has this is a tangent 00:04:51.000 --> 00:04:55.160 but So we've had to supplement for him just because 00:04:55.160 --> 00:04:58.860 I ran out of freezer supply. But I've also found 00:04:58.860 --> 00:05:01.220 like he'll sleep a little bit longer of a chunk 00:05:01.220 --> 00:05:03.279 for me at night if I give him a formula bottle 00:05:03.279 --> 00:05:07.100 before bed. And he has started to do the same 00:05:07.100 --> 00:05:09.439 thing where I'm like trying to feed him the formula 00:05:09.439 --> 00:05:13.439 bottle. And I might even be empty. And he's like, 00:05:13.480 --> 00:05:16.379 he swats away the formula bottle and is like 00:05:16.379 --> 00:05:18.660 turning his head into my boob. And I'm like, 00:05:18.720 --> 00:05:21.420 dude, I've got nothing left for you. And he still 00:05:21.420 --> 00:05:24.439 just wants, it's just the comfort. Yeah, that's, 00:05:24.459 --> 00:05:26.500 I think how Zeta is a lot of times is the comfort 00:05:26.500 --> 00:05:28.279 thing. But then she's not getting full. So I'm 00:05:28.279 --> 00:05:30.279 like, girl, you got to start taking this whole 00:05:30.279 --> 00:05:32.620 milk. Oh man. And the other night you had to 00:05:32.620 --> 00:05:36.000 literally feed her solids at 11 or something. 00:05:36.139 --> 00:05:39.300 It was. Yeah. I'm glad we finally figured out 00:05:39.300 --> 00:05:44.290 because this week sleep wise was rough. and she 00:05:44.290 --> 00:05:45.850 would just like wake up screaming and we couldn't 00:05:45.850 --> 00:05:47.470 figure out what it was and we finally were like 00:05:47.949 --> 00:05:50.970 oh we've been starving our child like not obviously 00:05:50.970 --> 00:05:53.329 obviously not on purpose yeah we just like didn't 00:05:53.329 --> 00:05:55.269 know she would just like wake up crying and we'd 00:05:55.269 --> 00:05:57.509 try everything i tried nursing her but then and 00:05:57.509 --> 00:05:59.189 this is part of how i'm like oh my supply must 00:05:59.189 --> 00:06:01.389 be going down she would like lose interest in 00:06:01.389 --> 00:06:02.970 nursing but then i'd like put her in her crib 00:06:02.970 --> 00:06:05.230 and she would still be upset and yeah yeah so 00:06:05.230 --> 00:06:07.269 one night i was just like i'm just gonna try 00:06:07.269 --> 00:06:09.250 to give her a snack and i gave her like a yogurt 00:06:09.250 --> 00:06:11.550 pouch and then she slept through the night so 00:06:11.550 --> 00:06:14.550 she just yeah so we're trying to figure out like 00:06:14.550 --> 00:06:18.300 what to give her before bed to keep her full 00:06:18.300 --> 00:06:21.100 what did you tell me it was like healthy fats 00:06:21.100 --> 00:06:24.100 and healthy fats and protein and protein are 00:06:24.100 --> 00:06:27.500 good for before bed yeah because we all have 00:06:27.500 --> 00:06:30.339 a blood sugar drop around 4 a .m to like prepare 00:06:30.339 --> 00:06:33.079 our body to wake up in the morning but interesting 00:06:33.079 --> 00:06:36.459 and protein and fat helps like stabilize blood 00:06:36.459 --> 00:06:40.839 sugar so if you have like carb and sugar heavy 00:06:40.839 --> 00:06:43.639 snacks, that drop is really drastic and it can 00:06:43.639 --> 00:06:45.560 wake you up because essentially your body's like 00:06:45.560 --> 00:06:48.600 dying. You know, obviously that's not actually 00:06:48.600 --> 00:06:50.680 what it is, but like that's kind of your body 00:06:50.680 --> 00:06:52.660 reaction. So if you have a high protein and high 00:06:52.660 --> 00:06:55.740 fat snack before bed, then you will still have 00:06:55.740 --> 00:06:57.740 a blood sugar drop, but it won't be so, it'll 00:06:57.740 --> 00:07:00.540 be more of how it's intended to be to like help 00:07:00.540 --> 00:07:03.920 your body start to wake up, but not wake you 00:07:03.920 --> 00:07:06.970 up before you. wild so yeah so we tried giving 00:07:06.970 --> 00:07:09.550 her butter before bed last night oh yeah uh it 00:07:09.550 --> 00:07:11.550 did not work dang it we'll try it again because 00:07:11.550 --> 00:07:13.829 yesterday was also like an off day with meals 00:07:13.829 --> 00:07:16.930 and just like how the day went so i'll try it 00:07:16.930 --> 00:07:19.069 again and see if like on a more normal day where 00:07:19.069 --> 00:07:23.089 she's maybe doing better anyways yeah it works 00:07:23.089 --> 00:07:25.589 yeah that's good yeah i've seen that butter trend 00:07:25.589 --> 00:07:29.079 where it's like two two bites of butter or whatever. 00:07:29.360 --> 00:07:31.120 Something like that, yeah. Yeah. We tried to 00:07:31.120 --> 00:07:33.019 do that with Colt when he was little and he legitimately 00:07:33.019 --> 00:07:35.860 threw up. Oh, so that did not work for you. So 00:07:35.860 --> 00:07:37.639 we've not tried that again. Yeah, that makes 00:07:37.639 --> 00:07:39.560 sense. Still hoping he'll sleep through the night, 00:07:39.620 --> 00:07:42.639 but hoping that butter won't have to be the case. 00:07:43.199 --> 00:07:47.480 Okay, so I guess let's hop in and really just 00:07:47.480 --> 00:07:51.680 talk about, like you said, it's such a, not cliche 00:07:51.680 --> 00:07:56.569 thing, but whenever you're... You know, it's 00:07:56.569 --> 00:07:59.089 like the missing something you can't have type 00:07:59.089 --> 00:08:05.589 of situation, which I feel like for me, motherhood 00:08:05.589 --> 00:08:12.009 is exactly what I have wanted for my entire life. 00:08:12.250 --> 00:08:16.970 And then when you're in it, it's extremely hard. 00:08:17.170 --> 00:08:20.610 Most days are hard. Most days bring so much joy. 00:08:21.230 --> 00:08:24.819 But there is part of me that misses. pre -kids 00:08:24.819 --> 00:08:28.379 yeah when i think like so i kind of going back 00:08:28.379 --> 00:08:29.899 to what i said earlier about like you're allowed 00:08:29.899 --> 00:08:32.860 to feel this way for other things stewart and 00:08:32.860 --> 00:08:35.480 i have talked about there are two things that 00:08:35.480 --> 00:08:38.340 we both miss about not being married like two 00:08:38.340 --> 00:08:42.720 very specific things one is Both of us at one 00:08:42.720 --> 00:08:44.639 point lived in a house, like he lived in a house 00:08:44.639 --> 00:08:46.320 with a bunch of guys and I lived in a house with 00:08:46.320 --> 00:08:48.919 a couple of girls. And just like how much fun 00:08:48.919 --> 00:08:51.679 that was. Fun. You know, obviously in very different 00:08:51.679 --> 00:08:54.700 ways. Just a fun stage of life. Yeah, it's a 00:08:54.700 --> 00:08:58.440 fun stage of life. And if I came home to having 00:08:58.440 --> 00:09:00.860 a bad day to a house of girls, very different 00:09:00.860 --> 00:09:03.080 than coming home to my husband. Not bad. You 00:09:03.080 --> 00:09:05.000 know, not that like, I mean, he's amazing. And 00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:07.500 if I have a bad day, I mean, usually he's coming 00:09:07.500 --> 00:09:09.279 home to me having a bad day. But, you know, he'll 00:09:09.279 --> 00:09:11.259 bring me like a sweet tree or, you know. He'll 00:09:11.259 --> 00:09:13.419 try to do something to make it better. But it's 00:09:13.419 --> 00:09:15.600 a very different experience than venting to your 00:09:15.600 --> 00:09:17.639 girlfriends and them being like, let's order 00:09:17.639 --> 00:09:19.899 Chinese food and put on a rom -com or something. 00:09:20.220 --> 00:09:23.320 Even if he did that, it's just not the same experience. 00:09:23.460 --> 00:09:25.620 That doesn't mean it's bad and that doesn't mean 00:09:25.620 --> 00:09:28.259 I don't want to be married. It's just a different 00:09:28.259 --> 00:09:30.799 experience. And then the other thing that we 00:09:30.799 --> 00:09:33.679 both have talked about missing is the very beginning 00:09:33.679 --> 00:09:35.679 of a relationship where it's like you're still 00:09:35.679 --> 00:09:39.639 flirty and everything's new and you don't really 00:09:39.639 --> 00:09:41.169 know this person. you're getting to know them. 00:09:41.169 --> 00:09:43.830 Like that goes away when you're married. And 00:09:43.830 --> 00:09:47.129 it's also nice to have like, Stuart's watched 00:09:47.129 --> 00:09:50.230 me birth two babies now. So like there's a level 00:09:50.230 --> 00:09:54.009 of intimacy that is really nice. That's beautiful 00:09:54.009 --> 00:09:56.009 in its own way, but it's just very different. 00:09:56.210 --> 00:09:59.919 And neither of those things that we miss. means 00:09:59.919 --> 00:10:02.220 that i regret getting married no it's just like 00:10:02.220 --> 00:10:04.159 oh that was a fun part of life that sometimes 00:10:04.159 --> 00:10:06.340 i'm like i wish i could relive that yeah and 00:10:06.340 --> 00:10:09.360 i can and that's okay you know but when you're 00:10:09.360 --> 00:10:11.980 in those stages of life you don't you don't know 00:10:11.980 --> 00:10:13.659 you don't know that you're gonna miss it yeah 00:10:13.659 --> 00:10:15.379 you're gonna look back on that and be like oh 00:10:15.379 --> 00:10:18.960 i really really enjoyed that yeah yeah um and 00:10:18.960 --> 00:10:21.740 i think like being a mom there are definitely 00:10:21.740 --> 00:10:24.620 things once i look back on i'm like oh like i 00:10:24.620 --> 00:10:27.740 miss that aspect of not being a mom of you know 00:10:27.740 --> 00:10:31.220 being a married couple without kids and i in 00:10:31.220 --> 00:10:33.679 no way regret my kids and i love them and i'm 00:10:33.679 --> 00:10:38.009 so glad to be their mom yeah but like yeah there 00:10:38.009 --> 00:10:40.389 are pieces that i miss and when i was preparing 00:10:40.389 --> 00:10:42.370 for this i realized like a lot of the stuff is 00:10:42.370 --> 00:10:46.789 honestly like kind of small like yeah the significance 00:10:46.789 --> 00:10:49.409 of like the big things i'm like no it's so much 00:10:49.409 --> 00:10:52.470 more fun to have christmas with kids you know 00:10:52.470 --> 00:10:55.470 so much it's the big things that make it worth 00:10:55.470 --> 00:10:57.690 it it's the little things i'm like oh i like 00:10:57.690 --> 00:10:59.889 kind of wish i could do that again and i think 00:10:59.889 --> 00:11:03.409 like for me it's like My joy is so much greater 00:11:03.409 --> 00:11:07.289 now with kids. But there are aspects of like 00:11:07.289 --> 00:11:11.669 the little things that, you know, made me happy, 00:11:11.750 --> 00:11:14.529 like sleeping in. Yeah. That's definitely one 00:11:14.529 --> 00:11:18.570 that I like. Yeah. That I just, I miss. Part 00:11:18.570 --> 00:11:21.029 of me wishes I could have maybe like one morning 00:11:21.029 --> 00:11:24.509 a week where it's like, oh, I wake up on my own 00:11:24.509 --> 00:11:28.529 time. There's no alarm. There's no. child waking 00:11:28.529 --> 00:11:31.649 me up and i'm just waking up maybe i'm scrolling 00:11:31.649 --> 00:11:34.210 on my phone for a little bit deciding when i 00:11:34.210 --> 00:11:36.350 want when i want to get out some of the stuff 00:11:36.350 --> 00:11:39.809 too what makes me like miss it and like makes 00:11:39.809 --> 00:11:42.250 me mad about it i guess is i'm like i would be 00:11:42.250 --> 00:11:44.809 such a better mom if i like got to experience 00:11:44.809 --> 00:11:48.070 some of the stuff which i obviously don't yeah 00:11:48.070 --> 00:11:51.940 but then when i was looking at this lists of 00:11:51.940 --> 00:11:54.480 like what are specific things that I'm like I 00:11:54.480 --> 00:11:56.759 maybe miss or wish I could have back sometimes 00:11:58.000 --> 00:12:01.059 I think the hardest part is I love being a mom. 00:12:01.139 --> 00:12:02.679 I wish I had a break from the responsibilities 00:12:02.679 --> 00:12:06.279 of being a mom. Where it's like the baby's screaming 00:12:06.279 --> 00:12:09.580 at 3 a .m. I just want to go back to sleep. I 00:12:09.580 --> 00:12:11.860 don't want to not have kids. I just don't want 00:12:11.860 --> 00:12:13.740 to be the one that has to get up at 3 a .m. to 00:12:13.740 --> 00:12:17.000 take care of the screaming baby. Sleeping is 00:12:17.000 --> 00:12:19.279 definitely one of the things on the list where 00:12:19.279 --> 00:12:24.580 I wish I could wake up on my own terms. sleep 00:12:24.580 --> 00:12:26.759 through the night and not have someone or you 00:12:26.759 --> 00:12:29.559 know if we want to stay up late not be like weighing 00:12:29.559 --> 00:12:32.100 the consequences like okay you know if we stay 00:12:32.100 --> 00:12:34.759 up till midnight so that we can watch this movie 00:12:34.759 --> 00:12:37.000 together or we can go out to do this thing together 00:12:37.000 --> 00:12:41.259 am i going to deeply regret it tomorrow or will 00:12:41.259 --> 00:12:44.779 i just kind of regret it so true so true it's 00:12:44.779 --> 00:12:47.539 yeah i mean obviously like i think we're gonna 00:12:47.539 --> 00:12:49.919 keep saying this like obviously the stage of 00:12:49.919 --> 00:12:54.480 life we're in is so much better than going back 00:12:54.480 --> 00:12:58.940 yeah but there are little pieces like eating 00:12:58.940 --> 00:13:04.120 a warm meal while it's actually warm and i thought 00:13:04.120 --> 00:13:07.799 of one how about not losing your train of thought 00:13:07.799 --> 00:13:11.559 there's one yeah yeah i feel like my attention 00:13:11.559 --> 00:13:14.659 span and i think it's because my mind's like 00:13:14.659 --> 00:13:17.399 thinking about a bajillion different things yeah 00:13:17.399 --> 00:13:21.019 all at once like i don't know if here's an example 00:13:21.019 --> 00:13:24.960 that I swear I go through on the daily. If someone's 00:13:24.960 --> 00:13:26.720 like talking about something from the past year 00:13:26.720 --> 00:13:29.240 and they're like, oh, that happened back in November, 00:13:29.539 --> 00:13:33.279 I legitimately have to sit there, maybe even 00:13:33.279 --> 00:13:36.679 close my eyes and think about what month of the 00:13:36.679 --> 00:13:39.840 year we are currently in or what day of the week 00:13:39.840 --> 00:13:43.419 it is. Most of the time I'm like, I don't even 00:13:43.419 --> 00:13:45.620 know. I sometimes even have to look at my phone. 00:13:45.639 --> 00:13:47.860 I'm like, oh, while we're recording this, it's 00:13:47.860 --> 00:13:51.200 February right now. Oh, it's not actually November 00:13:51.200 --> 00:13:54.879 or. Yeah. I never know when it is. Everything 00:13:54.879 --> 00:13:58.259 kind of blurs together. Yeah. And I just feel 00:13:58.259 --> 00:14:02.259 like my mind is so, maybe spacey is not the word, 00:14:02.320 --> 00:14:05.259 but I just feel like I'm focused on so many things 00:14:05.259 --> 00:14:08.779 all at once that I don't feel fully present in 00:14:08.779 --> 00:14:12.840 one. For sure. Yeah. One area. I feel like I've 00:14:12.840 --> 00:14:15.139 always had a hard time with like being able to 00:14:15.139 --> 00:14:17.710 turn off my brain. If that makes sense, you know, 00:14:17.710 --> 00:14:18.769 where there are times where you're like, hey, 00:14:18.809 --> 00:14:21.029 I don't want to be thinking about a thousand 00:14:21.029 --> 00:14:22.529 things. I want to be present in this moment, 00:14:22.610 --> 00:14:25.850 whatever this moment may be. I feel like I've 00:14:25.850 --> 00:14:27.629 always had a hard time with that. But now even 00:14:27.629 --> 00:14:30.830 more so because I'm like, I have humans that 00:14:30.830 --> 00:14:34.850 I'm keeping alive upstairs. And yeah, there's 00:14:34.850 --> 00:14:37.629 just like another level of pressure. Yes. Yeah. 00:14:37.990 --> 00:14:41.950 And I don't think I realized that pressure until 00:14:41.950 --> 00:14:45.019 like. I don't know if I fully understood that 00:14:45.019 --> 00:14:47.559 pressure until actually being in the pressure 00:14:47.559 --> 00:14:51.159 of it. It's definitely one of those things where, 00:14:51.179 --> 00:14:53.820 you know, before you have kids, people tell you, 00:14:53.840 --> 00:14:55.799 like, your whole life is going to change. And 00:14:55.799 --> 00:14:56.740 you're probably, where do you see it going to 00:14:56.740 --> 00:14:57.840 change? And blah, blah, blah. And you're like, 00:14:57.899 --> 00:14:59.940 yeah, yeah, sure. Like, of course they are. And 00:14:59.940 --> 00:15:02.519 then you feel it. And you're like, oh, no, but, 00:15:02.600 --> 00:15:04.840 like, actually. Yes. The things I care about 00:15:04.840 --> 00:15:07.879 are so different than. Oh, absolutely. Like, 00:15:07.960 --> 00:15:10.940 what I care about the most is the health and 00:15:10.940 --> 00:15:13.860 wellness of my children. And everything else 00:15:13.860 --> 00:15:18.299 falls below that. Where, yeah, like, I don't 00:15:18.299 --> 00:15:20.899 care if I offend you anymore when I tell you 00:15:20.899 --> 00:15:24.759 whatever, because this protects my kids. And 00:15:24.759 --> 00:15:27.299 that is much more important than me offending 00:15:27.299 --> 00:15:30.440 you. Sorry, not sorry. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. Have 00:15:30.440 --> 00:15:33.899 you heard the saying, like, I don't know what 00:15:33.899 --> 00:15:35.700 the saying is. I feel like I'm so bad at quotes 00:15:35.700 --> 00:15:38.240 and sayings, but I know, like, the gist of it. 00:15:38.299 --> 00:15:41.639 Yeah. But, like, that you. What the heck did 00:15:41.639 --> 00:15:44.759 we do with our time before having kids? I wonder 00:15:44.759 --> 00:15:46.679 that all the time. I feel like I was so busy 00:15:46.679 --> 00:15:49.259 pre -kids. My house was always a mess pre -kids. 00:15:49.460 --> 00:15:54.240 Yes. And now I'm like I had so much time. I know. 00:15:54.620 --> 00:15:57.519 How is it a mess? Yeah. Like I just must have 00:15:57.519 --> 00:15:59.299 been the laziest person in the world. That's 00:15:59.299 --> 00:16:02.139 what it feels like. Yeah. But at the time you 00:16:02.139 --> 00:16:04.639 genuinely feel like you didn't have the time 00:16:04.639 --> 00:16:08.039 to do it. I do. One thing I miss actually is 00:16:08.039 --> 00:16:11.429 so. Michael and I both work at a church. Sunday 00:16:11.429 --> 00:16:14.190 afternoons, we would go home and we would both 00:16:14.190 --> 00:16:16.490 take a nap on the couch. That post -church nap? 00:16:16.590 --> 00:16:19.909 It was glorious. And I remember, so we lived 00:16:19.909 --> 00:16:22.809 in an apartment at the time and it was like the 00:16:22.809 --> 00:16:25.149 time of day, the sun would be shining in the 00:16:25.149 --> 00:16:28.990 windows and we have a sectional. And so like 00:16:28.990 --> 00:16:30.710 Michael would be on one section and I'd be on 00:16:30.710 --> 00:16:32.850 the other section. We'd have like a show on or 00:16:32.850 --> 00:16:35.450 if Sunday football was on or whatever. And both 00:16:35.450 --> 00:16:38.009 of us would just be conked out for like. two, 00:16:38.090 --> 00:16:42.889 three hours maybe. And it was glorious. And now 00:16:42.889 --> 00:16:46.009 it's like, if I even think about shutting my 00:16:46.009 --> 00:16:48.350 eyes on a Sunday afternoon, I swear one of my 00:16:48.350 --> 00:16:52.250 kids wakes up immediately. It's like they know. 00:16:52.649 --> 00:16:56.009 They know when I close my eyes. Yeah. I think 00:16:56.009 --> 00:16:58.230 like that's definitely one thing is just like 00:16:58.230 --> 00:17:02.350 being more in control of your schedule, you know, 00:17:02.370 --> 00:17:04.509 where it's like, oh, I want to take a nap right 00:17:04.509 --> 00:17:07.190 now. Or one of the things I realized I missed, 00:17:07.759 --> 00:17:12.099 is being able to take quick trips like i forgot 00:17:12.099 --> 00:17:14.759 to grab milk yep i'm gonna i'm just gonna run 00:17:14.759 --> 00:17:18.019 to the store in the store it'll be uh like with 00:17:18.019 --> 00:17:20.940 where our house is right now i could be to and 00:17:20.940 --> 00:17:23.460 from the store and back in my house in probably 00:17:23.460 --> 00:17:26.180 seven minutes yeah if i like really wanted like 00:17:26.180 --> 00:17:28.539 yeah but like you were like walking at a kind 00:17:28.539 --> 00:17:31.500 of a yeah you know the light across the street 00:17:31.500 --> 00:17:33.359 is on you know green when i pull up and stuff 00:17:33.359 --> 00:17:36.420 like that yeah legitimately i could under 10 00:17:36.420 --> 00:17:39.160 minutes i know the sonic by our house we can 00:17:39.160 --> 00:17:41.640 do like a 10 minute round trip yeah easily but 00:17:41.640 --> 00:17:43.980 now it's like okay give me 15 minutes to get 00:17:43.980 --> 00:17:46.180 the kids in the car right like first i have to 00:17:46.180 --> 00:17:48.099 convince lloyd that like yes we do have to get 00:17:48.099 --> 00:17:51.559 in the car right now and so then it's like it 00:17:51.559 --> 00:17:53.440 feels like it's not worth it to just like go 00:17:53.440 --> 00:17:55.720 to quick trips yeah um so that was one thing 00:17:55.720 --> 00:17:58.380 i realized i miss that's just like such a silly 00:17:58.380 --> 00:18:01.650 thing to be able to you know run and get yourself 00:18:01.650 --> 00:18:04.289 a coffee or you know pick up the groceries that 00:18:04.289 --> 00:18:07.609 you forgot and i don't feel the same about like 00:18:07.609 --> 00:18:10.450 full grocery trips no i like i can handle a full 00:18:10.450 --> 00:18:13.829 grocery trip with the kids not as it doesn't 00:18:13.829 --> 00:18:16.029 feel as big of a deal it's the i just need to 00:18:16.029 --> 00:18:19.089 run it out for one thing yeah um we're like it's 00:18:19.089 --> 00:18:21.109 like you just don't want to you're like it's 00:18:21.109 --> 00:18:24.490 not worth it for one little thing or whatever 00:18:24.490 --> 00:18:26.529 i'm gonna spend more time getting the kids in 00:18:26.529 --> 00:18:30.519 and out of the car than i am yep get going to 00:18:30.519 --> 00:18:32.779 spend time getting whatever I need to pick up. 00:18:32.839 --> 00:18:36.640 Yeah. It's so true. It's so true. Yeah. I, I 00:18:36.640 --> 00:18:38.640 have talked about this many times, but we take 00:18:38.640 --> 00:18:40.839 advantage of target pickup order now because 00:18:40.839 --> 00:18:44.279 that's the only way that I justify like, Oh, 00:18:44.420 --> 00:18:46.200 I just need a couple of things. So I'm going 00:18:46.200 --> 00:18:50.039 to, you know, we'll go run an errand or whatever, 00:18:50.200 --> 00:18:52.160 pick it up on the way home from church. Like 00:18:52.160 --> 00:18:54.980 if we're already out, but getting in and out 00:18:54.980 --> 00:18:58.250 of the car for some things. Just one or two items 00:18:58.250 --> 00:19:01.289 is like, it's so hard. I'll go, I'll go a couple 00:19:01.289 --> 00:19:03.690 of days without milk. It's fine. Yeah. Like make 00:19:03.690 --> 00:19:06.210 Stuart pick it up on his way home. Exactly. Exactly. 00:19:06.609 --> 00:19:10.750 Yeah. Yeah. I think one thing that I miss is 00:19:10.750 --> 00:19:14.589 just the amount of alone time, I guess I could 00:19:14.589 --> 00:19:17.930 have taken advantage of. I'm pretty codependent 00:19:17.930 --> 00:19:21.190 and I, I admit that like Michael would say, I 00:19:21.190 --> 00:19:22.809 feel like we've talked about this before. Yes. 00:19:24.129 --> 00:19:26.410 And ever since Michael and I were dating, like 00:19:26.410 --> 00:19:30.230 I, and we've been dating, we're still dating 00:19:30.230 --> 00:19:32.390 because we're married, but we've known each other 00:19:32.390 --> 00:19:36.609 since 2014. Okay. And so, and once we started 00:19:36.609 --> 00:19:40.190 dating, like, so we did a ministry program together. 00:19:40.609 --> 00:19:42.630 And so we'd see each other every single day. 00:19:42.710 --> 00:19:46.210 We'd be together pretty much from sunup till 00:19:46.210 --> 00:19:52.029 sundown. I think that like created this codependency 00:19:52.029 --> 00:19:55.470 in me. And so when we got married and pre -kids, 00:19:55.690 --> 00:19:58.069 it just like, I'm like, no, let's hang out together 00:19:58.069 --> 00:20:01.049 all the time. Like when you like your spouse. 00:20:01.130 --> 00:20:03.250 Yeah. Like you should want to hang out with your 00:20:03.250 --> 00:20:07.609 spouse. I want to. Yeah. But I think I wish I 00:20:07.609 --> 00:20:10.049 would have maybe taken advantage of a little 00:20:10.049 --> 00:20:13.410 bit more like, oh, well, I'm going to, I don't 00:20:13.410 --> 00:20:15.130 know. I'm going to sit in the sun and read this 00:20:15.130 --> 00:20:19.160 book. Not talk to anybody. And that's the one 00:20:19.160 --> 00:20:21.480 thing else I miss is just like sitting down and 00:20:21.480 --> 00:20:24.299 reading a book and like actually getting to read 00:20:24.299 --> 00:20:26.460 a book for as long as I want to read a book for. 00:20:26.720 --> 00:20:30.240 Yeah. One of the things I put down is being able 00:20:30.240 --> 00:20:33.180 to take care of myself and like a lot of that 00:20:33.180 --> 00:20:37.420 stuff. So before I got pregnant with Lloyd, actually, 00:20:37.440 --> 00:20:39.279 yeah, leading up to when I got pregnant with 00:20:39.279 --> 00:20:43.259 Lloyd, I worked at 7 a .m. from home. And I would 00:20:43.259 --> 00:20:46.799 get up at 5 .45 every morning and walk a mile. 00:20:46.960 --> 00:20:51.359 Oh, wow. And then at the time, that summer, we 00:20:51.359 --> 00:20:54.180 lived in an apartment with a pool. So I would 00:20:54.180 --> 00:20:57.380 get done with work at 3 and pretty much by like 00:20:57.380 --> 00:20:59.480 3 .05, I'd be down by the pool with my book. 00:20:59.759 --> 00:21:05.140 Nice. You know, whatever drink I had and then 00:21:05.140 --> 00:21:07.900 just like read till Stuart got home. And that 00:21:07.900 --> 00:21:11.519 was like every day. So nice. And when I went 00:21:11.519 --> 00:21:14.240 back to work after Lloyd was born, I'm like, 00:21:14.359 --> 00:21:17.140 I'm not waking my baby up at 545 to go on a walk. 00:21:17.299 --> 00:21:19.140 No, absolutely not. So even just like little 00:21:19.140 --> 00:21:21.279 stuff like that where it's like, okay, I would 00:21:21.279 --> 00:21:24.180 still like to go on walks regularly. Like I know 00:21:24.180 --> 00:21:26.319 I'd feel better if I walked a mile every day, 00:21:26.440 --> 00:21:29.059 but when am I going to fit that in? And it's 00:21:29.059 --> 00:21:30.980 so, yeah, it's one of those things too where 00:21:30.980 --> 00:21:32.859 it's like, okay, loading up both kids in the 00:21:32.859 --> 00:21:36.220 stroller or whatever. And I don't know if Lloyd 00:21:36.220 --> 00:21:38.160 is like this, but Colt wants to walk everywhere 00:21:38.160 --> 00:21:42.329 now. And so it depends. Yeah. Yeah. So I don't 00:21:42.329 --> 00:21:45.109 know. And I feel like this podcast makes it sound 00:21:45.109 --> 00:21:48.130 like we don't like big moms, but we really do. 00:21:48.190 --> 00:21:50.930 I promise. I, I'm sure all moms can relate to 00:21:50.930 --> 00:21:52.890 this, but yeah, but I think just like being able 00:21:52.890 --> 00:21:55.390 to take care of yourself. Right. And like, yes. 00:21:55.690 --> 00:21:58.029 How many times, I don't know if this, I'm sure 00:21:58.029 --> 00:21:59.950 this happens to you where you're like, okay, 00:21:59.990 --> 00:22:03.259 tonight kids are going to go down. I'm going 00:22:03.259 --> 00:22:05.380 to like, maybe I'll go crazy. I'll do like a 00:22:05.380 --> 00:22:07.279 mask and read a book or something like that. 00:22:07.359 --> 00:22:10.000 And of course, of course, that's a night where 00:22:10.000 --> 00:22:12.079 no one's going to sleep. And then by the time 00:22:12.079 --> 00:22:14.700 everyone's asleep, it's like nine 30 and you're 00:22:14.700 --> 00:22:17.759 like, well, I just want to, I just want to go 00:22:17.759 --> 00:22:19.759 to sleep or snack, watch a show and go to bed. 00:22:19.839 --> 00:22:22.700 Yeah. The energy that I have to do what I wanted 00:22:22.700 --> 00:22:25.880 to do doesn't exist anymore. Exactly. That's 00:22:25.880 --> 00:22:28.900 my whole thing with like, um, so we're getting 00:22:28.900 --> 00:22:31.640 ready to go on a trip this next week and I've 00:22:31.640 --> 00:22:34.920 already started packing so we we're recording 00:22:34.920 --> 00:22:37.299 today it's saturday right now and we leave this 00:22:37.299 --> 00:22:40.039 next friday and i've already started to pack 00:22:40.039 --> 00:22:43.579 knowing that i'm like i get the motivation at 00:22:43.579 --> 00:22:45.099 night to be like okay i'm gonna get some packing 00:22:45.099 --> 00:22:47.279 done but every night's not gonna work out that 00:22:47.279 --> 00:22:50.839 way where it's like oh i'm actually gonna have 00:22:50.839 --> 00:22:53.319 the time or the energy to actually get stuff 00:22:53.319 --> 00:22:56.079 done for sure but going back to the self -care 00:22:56.079 --> 00:22:59.099 thing that's my like My thing with showering 00:22:59.099 --> 00:23:01.960 is like, so I shower at nighttime, usually after 00:23:01.960 --> 00:23:05.059 the kids go to bed. And at multiple nights, it'll 00:23:05.059 --> 00:23:08.920 be like, okay, I'm showering tonight. Yeah. Try 00:23:08.920 --> 00:23:11.539 to get both kids down. And then it just doesn't 00:23:11.539 --> 00:23:13.200 work out the way you want it to work out. For 00:23:13.200 --> 00:23:15.119 sure. And it's like, okay, push it to the next 00:23:15.119 --> 00:23:18.500 day. And then same thing. Push it to the next 00:23:18.500 --> 00:23:20.680 day. Yeah. And then you're like, oh, no wonder 00:23:20.680 --> 00:23:23.380 I feel like garbage. Actually disgusting. Yeah. 00:23:23.500 --> 00:23:26.470 Yeah. Yeah. I think another thing, speaking of 00:23:26.470 --> 00:23:31.690 packing, is rushing. Like I don't like to rush 00:23:31.690 --> 00:23:33.369 all the time. Like I don't want to constantly 00:23:33.369 --> 00:23:36.089 be in a rush. But there are times when like you 00:23:36.089 --> 00:23:38.890 just are, you know, where like getting ready 00:23:38.890 --> 00:23:41.809 for church. It used to be I could get up like 00:23:41.809 --> 00:23:44.829 20 minutes before I had to leave. And you throw 00:23:44.829 --> 00:23:47.569 on some mascara, put on some deodorant. Yep. 00:23:47.890 --> 00:23:51.630 And then be out the door. And now, I mean, and 00:23:51.630 --> 00:23:54.670 I feel like we do pretty good. i can get up an 00:23:54.670 --> 00:23:56.890 hour before we have to leave yep and get all 00:23:56.890 --> 00:23:59.769 three of us ready to go in that hour just like 00:23:59.769 --> 00:24:02.730 being able to go like i mean it's kind of a lot 00:24:02.730 --> 00:24:04.269 of this has to do with getting in car seats car 00:24:04.269 --> 00:24:06.990 seats are i understand the importance yes car 00:24:06.990 --> 00:24:09.230 seat safety so it's very important i feel that 00:24:09.230 --> 00:24:12.269 but they're just the worst yes yeah we're just 00:24:12.269 --> 00:24:15.609 like oh we need to leave right now and that just 00:24:15.609 --> 00:24:18.269 doesn't exist for a toddler no the right now 00:24:18.269 --> 00:24:23.000 is yeah and so like trying to like get things 00:24:23.000 --> 00:24:27.240 done in like the time that you want it, whether 00:24:27.240 --> 00:24:30.059 it is speedy or not, it's just, it's really hard. 00:24:30.119 --> 00:24:32.799 And that gets so frustrating too. I've seen this 00:24:32.799 --> 00:24:35.660 thing going around where it's like, I want things 00:24:35.660 --> 00:24:39.400 not to be an emergency or like where are the 00:24:39.400 --> 00:24:41.519 aspects of my life that I don't have to rush, 00:24:41.619 --> 00:24:44.759 but I am rushing. So like they give examples 00:24:44.759 --> 00:24:47.619 of like brushing my own teeth. I don't have to 00:24:47.619 --> 00:24:50.660 like brush my teeth like crazy. I can actually 00:24:50.660 --> 00:24:54.000 maybe take a minute and brush my teeth at a normal 00:24:54.000 --> 00:24:57.200 pace and things like that. I mean, when you're 00:24:57.200 --> 00:24:58.920 on a time crunch, obviously like getting into 00:24:58.920 --> 00:25:01.480 the car seats and stuff, I feel like those are 00:25:01.480 --> 00:25:03.460 the things that raise like my blood pressure 00:25:03.460 --> 00:25:06.319 or like my anxiety is like, all right, come on, 00:25:06.339 --> 00:25:08.640 let's go. We got to go. We got to go. And, and 00:25:08.640 --> 00:25:11.980 Colt's like, like, Oh, look at this. this toy 00:25:11.980 --> 00:25:14.279 i want to play with this toy and i'm like nobody 00:25:14.279 --> 00:25:16.680 come on we gotta go gotta go can i take both 00:25:16.680 --> 00:25:19.400 cars into the car with me like no pick one yeah 00:25:19.400 --> 00:25:22.420 huh which which toy do i take in the car yeah 00:25:22.420 --> 00:25:25.740 yeah colt's whole new thing is like which i really 00:25:25.740 --> 00:25:28.000 appreciate is he wants to put his own shoes on 00:25:28.000 --> 00:25:30.940 and we haven't gotten there quite yet most of 00:25:30.940 --> 00:25:33.720 the time they're on the wrong feet which is fine 00:25:33.720 --> 00:25:35.960 and i'll mention to him like hey buddy they're 00:25:35.960 --> 00:25:37.259 on the wrong feet do you want to switch them 00:25:37.259 --> 00:25:39.519 and sometimes he wants to switch them sometimes 00:25:39.519 --> 00:25:41.539 he doesn't but then it becomes the whole thing 00:25:41.539 --> 00:25:45.099 and if I try to help him at all then it's like 00:25:45.099 --> 00:25:49.319 game over I've lost yeah we're not going anywhere 00:25:49.319 --> 00:25:52.779 for 10 -15 minutes because this is a whole big 00:25:52.779 --> 00:25:56.299 thing and then my blood pressure rises and then 00:25:56.299 --> 00:25:59.039 it's like yeah then it's an emergency and a rush 00:25:59.039 --> 00:26:02.960 to get out of the house or wherever we are all 00:26:02.960 --> 00:26:07.900 that to say I miss the like yeah the slower pace 00:26:07.900 --> 00:26:11.569 of I don't know not rushing like you said yeah 00:26:11.569 --> 00:26:14.009 yeah yeah like you can rush when you need to 00:26:14.009 --> 00:26:16.970 but like everything isn't a rush yeah where like 00:26:16.970 --> 00:26:18.650 I guess yeah that's kind of how it feels with 00:26:18.650 --> 00:26:20.910 little kids is you're like everything is a rush 00:26:20.910 --> 00:26:24.750 because everything just takes longer yeah and 00:26:24.750 --> 00:26:28.509 that's really hard yeah another thing that I 00:26:28.509 --> 00:26:31.569 miss is like the spontaneity of things I have 00:26:31.569 --> 00:26:34.970 that too do you yeah and just even the simplest 00:26:34.970 --> 00:26:37.049 things where it's like should we do this today 00:26:37.049 --> 00:26:39.789 or Should we go grocery shopping right now or 00:26:39.789 --> 00:26:41.670 should we – Should we do that tomorrow? Do you 00:26:41.670 --> 00:26:44.029 want to go to the movies or – Yeah. Yeah. I know 00:26:44.029 --> 00:26:46.910 there's one story. Stuart and I had been married 00:26:46.910 --> 00:26:51.029 for like probably less than a year. And he was 00:26:51.029 --> 00:26:53.869 at work and one of us texted the other and was 00:26:53.869 --> 00:26:55.509 like, hey, do you want to go to a ball game tonight? 00:26:56.329 --> 00:27:00.089 And I think we called up like another young married 00:27:00.089 --> 00:27:02.410 couple we knew. They had only been married a 00:27:02.410 --> 00:27:05.390 couple months. And we bought tickets like five 00:27:05.390 --> 00:27:08.099 hours before the game. So fun. In Colorado for 00:27:08.099 --> 00:27:09.859 the Rockies, that's when you want to buy tickets 00:27:09.859 --> 00:27:12.940 because we got like amazing tickets for super, 00:27:13.039 --> 00:27:15.119 super cheap. Yep. Now you could probably get 00:27:15.119 --> 00:27:17.460 super cheap tickets. No matter what. Yeah, because 00:27:17.460 --> 00:27:19.319 they're terrible. But yeah, we bought tickets 00:27:19.319 --> 00:27:21.960 like five hours before the game. We took the 00:27:21.960 --> 00:27:25.460 bus downtown. So fun. Got hot dogs. We stayed 00:27:25.460 --> 00:27:29.779 out till like 1 a .m. And no part of that could 00:27:29.779 --> 00:27:33.819 we do now because even if like we're pretty lucky 00:27:33.819 --> 00:27:36.839 in that. We probably could get one of our parents 00:27:36.839 --> 00:27:39.339 to babysit last minute. But that's still just, 00:27:39.400 --> 00:27:42.799 like, an added step of, like, is this worth even 00:27:42.799 --> 00:27:44.539 thinking about? Like, it's kind of rude to ask 00:27:44.539 --> 00:27:47.019 you last minute. Anyways, like, I don't want 00:27:47.019 --> 00:27:50.279 to be that way. The prep, like, going into it 00:27:50.279 --> 00:27:52.799 is, like, okay. making sure kids have dinner, 00:27:52.960 --> 00:27:56.019 prep, jammies, like what do they need for bedtime? 00:27:56.259 --> 00:27:57.819 And then like, I don't want to be staying out 00:27:57.819 --> 00:28:00.160 till 1 a .m. So then is this game even worth 00:28:00.160 --> 00:28:01.599 it? If we're going to, you know, are we going 00:28:01.599 --> 00:28:03.880 to have to leave midway through? Yeah. And like 00:28:03.880 --> 00:28:06.000 that moment in that day was so much fun because 00:28:06.000 --> 00:28:08.220 it was just like so spontaneous and like, let's 00:28:08.220 --> 00:28:11.539 just go. Or yeah, even stuff like, I don't want 00:28:11.539 --> 00:28:13.140 to cook tonight. Let's go out to dinner. Okay. 00:28:13.420 --> 00:28:15.859 You know, we do that sometimes now, but usually 00:28:15.859 --> 00:28:18.039 it's like, let's get McDonald's. Yeah, exactly. 00:28:18.119 --> 00:28:19.880 I was going to say ours is Chick -fil -A. So 00:28:19.880 --> 00:28:22.079 then they can play. Or we're going to bring it 00:28:22.079 --> 00:28:25.059 back home because it's easier to strap you into 00:28:25.059 --> 00:28:27.119 your booster seat than to try to do with you 00:28:27.119 --> 00:28:29.960 at a restaurant. Absolutely. So yeah, spontaneity 00:28:29.960 --> 00:28:33.119 is definitely a big one. Yeah, I feel that for 00:28:33.119 --> 00:28:36.299 sure. One of the things that I realized is sick 00:28:36.299 --> 00:28:38.660 days, like actually being able to take a sick 00:28:38.660 --> 00:28:41.180 day. Yeah, you just had one of those. So this 00:28:41.180 --> 00:28:45.039 week I was like, this was God's timing or something 00:28:45.039 --> 00:28:48.210 like that. So Zeta got... a stomach bug a week 00:28:48.210 --> 00:28:51.289 ago and then i got it two days later and it just 00:28:51.289 --> 00:28:53.750 happened to be the day that my parents already 00:28:53.750 --> 00:28:56.670 take the kids so i like actually took a sick 00:28:56.670 --> 00:28:59.690 day i called into work and then my parents still 00:28:59.690 --> 00:29:01.890 took the kids and i just laid on the couch all 00:29:01.890 --> 00:29:05.289 day and tried not to throw up yeah it's not like 00:29:05.289 --> 00:29:07.349 it was an enjoyable time but the fact that you 00:29:07.349 --> 00:29:11.529 didn't have i yeah i wasn't thinking about I've 00:29:11.529 --> 00:29:13.230 been trying to make someone else a meal while 00:29:13.230 --> 00:29:16.369 I'm trying not to throw up. That's such a random 00:29:16.369 --> 00:29:19.430 one that you would never... Pre -having kids, 00:29:19.509 --> 00:29:23.230 I don't think I could ever think about the value 00:29:23.230 --> 00:29:26.630 of not having to take care of anyone while you're 00:29:26.630 --> 00:29:30.089 sick. And not feeling guilty about it, too. That's 00:29:30.089 --> 00:29:32.549 the other side of it. Anytime I feel like I'm... 00:29:32.549 --> 00:29:34.829 I feel like we've been sick a lot this year, 00:29:34.930 --> 00:29:37.490 but I feel like I haven't had too many sick days 00:29:37.490 --> 00:29:39.980 where I'm like... oh, I just really need to lay 00:29:39.980 --> 00:29:44.740 down. And when I do have that, I feel almost 00:29:44.740 --> 00:29:48.960 guilty in the fact that I feel that terrible 00:29:48.960 --> 00:29:53.200 that I have to go lay down. Usually I just try 00:29:53.200 --> 00:29:57.319 to power through, which makes it worse for everybody. 00:29:57.480 --> 00:30:01.380 But there's the guilt aspect. I guess that's 00:30:01.380 --> 00:30:05.619 another thing that maybe I miss is not having 00:30:05.619 --> 00:30:09.640 that mom guilt. over you, especially with like, 00:30:09.740 --> 00:30:12.599 I would say one of the biggest things I feel 00:30:12.599 --> 00:30:16.259 right now with working from home is that I'm 00:30:16.259 --> 00:30:19.400 like not good enough in any area. Like, yeah, 00:30:19.460 --> 00:30:23.359 I might be thriving in motherhood in a week, 00:30:23.440 --> 00:30:25.819 but then I feel like a terrible employee and 00:30:25.819 --> 00:30:29.700 vice versa. And that was just, I didn't work 00:30:29.700 --> 00:30:32.599 from home a ton before kids, like maybe the occasional 00:30:32.599 --> 00:30:35.500 day, but there was not really ever a day where 00:30:35.500 --> 00:30:38.480 I was like, Man, I just like I feel like a terrible 00:30:38.480 --> 00:30:41.599 employee today. Yeah. Because my attention was 00:30:41.599 --> 00:30:45.420 not on my work or whatever. Or so I did work 00:30:45.420 --> 00:30:50.279 from home beforehand. And I already think there's 00:30:50.279 --> 00:30:52.859 like a level of working from home where because 00:30:52.859 --> 00:30:56.970 of. people on TikTok who like, whether they're 00:30:56.970 --> 00:30:59.970 doing it satirically or not, they're like, oh, 00:30:59.990 --> 00:31:01.690 me working from home and it's them getting their 00:31:01.690 --> 00:31:03.890 nails done and doing stuff that's not their job. 00:31:04.009 --> 00:31:05.730 Like there's this pressure of working from home 00:31:05.730 --> 00:31:07.569 where you're like, I swear to God, I'm doing 00:31:07.569 --> 00:31:10.849 my job. But then for me, I'm like, I feel like 00:31:10.849 --> 00:31:13.109 I have to work 10 times harder because I need 00:31:13.109 --> 00:31:15.650 to, I want to make sure that there's never a 00:31:15.650 --> 00:31:18.809 doubt that my kids are impeding on my job performance. 00:31:18.930 --> 00:31:20.490 And I don't want that to every reason you can 00:31:20.490 --> 00:31:24.309 fire me. Yep. So true. Yeah. So I feel like when 00:31:24.309 --> 00:31:25.990 you work for, at least for me, when I worked 00:31:25.990 --> 00:31:28.289 from home full time, there was already this kind 00:31:28.289 --> 00:31:31.490 of like, I swear I'm not like this TikToker who's 00:31:31.490 --> 00:31:34.890 just like not working. Like I am actually doing 00:31:34.890 --> 00:31:37.789 my job. Like you can see like my performance, 00:31:37.890 --> 00:31:39.750 blah, blah, blah. But then now with kids, there's 00:31:39.750 --> 00:31:42.869 definitely that like added pressure of, I swear, 00:31:42.930 --> 00:31:46.029 like I'm working hard. I'm doing my best. I know. 00:31:46.130 --> 00:31:48.869 And it's hard. Cause I'm like, I don't necessarily 00:31:48.869 --> 00:31:52.079 know how to prove that other than like, the output 00:31:52.079 --> 00:31:55.400 that yeah yeah it's definitely that guilt is 00:31:55.400 --> 00:31:58.839 kind of like in all areas yeah absolutely oh 00:31:58.839 --> 00:32:02.660 another one is being able to dress myself and 00:32:02.660 --> 00:32:04.579 I mean this in like a couple of ways because 00:32:04.579 --> 00:32:06.480 like obviously and we've talked about this before 00:32:06.480 --> 00:32:09.240 there's like the actual physical changes of your 00:32:09.240 --> 00:32:10.960 body where it's like oh clothes don't fit the 00:32:10.960 --> 00:32:13.140 way that they used to or you know I've had to 00:32:13.140 --> 00:32:15.259 buy all new jeans or there's that part of it 00:32:15.259 --> 00:32:18.740 but there's also this aspect of like practicality 00:32:18.740 --> 00:32:21.319 that I didn't need to used to have You know, 00:32:21.400 --> 00:32:25.099 like I didn't need to use to make sure that my 00:32:25.099 --> 00:32:27.539 pants were stretchy enough that I could like 00:32:27.539 --> 00:32:29.420 get down on the floor with my toddler. So true. 00:32:29.819 --> 00:32:32.859 Or right now we're weaning Zeta off, but for 00:32:32.859 --> 00:32:35.519 basically two and a half years straight, I've 00:32:35.519 --> 00:32:38.099 been breastfeeding. So I guess, I mean, there's 00:32:38.099 --> 00:32:39.420 a little bit of a break when I was pregnant with 00:32:39.420 --> 00:32:42.069 Zeta and Lloyd wasn't breastfeeding, but. now 00:32:42.069 --> 00:32:43.809 for almost three and a half years, I've either 00:32:43.809 --> 00:32:46.329 been pregnant or breastfeeding, which means my 00:32:46.329 --> 00:32:48.950 wardrobe has to adjust to that in some capacity. 00:32:49.089 --> 00:32:51.230 It's like, you need a shirt that you can like 00:32:51.230 --> 00:32:53.509 have easy boob access so you can feed your baby 00:32:53.509 --> 00:32:56.730 in public, you know? So I think there's like 00:32:56.730 --> 00:32:59.730 this practicality aspect of dressing as a mom 00:32:59.730 --> 00:33:03.670 that I was not prepared for, even though like 00:33:03.670 --> 00:33:05.829 I babysat and stuff like that and know that. 00:33:06.210 --> 00:33:10.359 Yeah. Or when I think of like outfits that I 00:33:10.359 --> 00:33:12.279 used to like wear and feel confident in. I'm 00:33:12.279 --> 00:33:15.619 like, even if that fit now, I wouldn't be able 00:33:15.619 --> 00:33:20.289 to wear it because like I can't be. the mom that 00:33:20.289 --> 00:33:22.410 i you know i can't be running after my kid and 00:33:22.410 --> 00:33:25.369 you know doing these things but then i also still 00:33:25.369 --> 00:33:28.589 want to look cute i know and i can't afford a 00:33:28.589 --> 00:33:31.450 stylist to just like come in and revamp my wardrobe 00:33:31.450 --> 00:33:34.809 and make sure i have all the you know you always 00:33:34.809 --> 00:33:37.069 get the targeted ads that are like well you could 00:33:37.069 --> 00:33:39.849 just spend 150 a month and we'll send you clothes 00:33:39.849 --> 00:33:43.740 you're like i've been tempted so many times what's 00:33:43.740 --> 00:33:45.480 the whole like getting your colors done have 00:33:45.480 --> 00:33:48.319 you seen that i have yeah yeah i want to do that 00:33:48.319 --> 00:33:52.019 so badly and apparently like chat gpt can help 00:33:52.019 --> 00:33:54.480 you do it but anytime i've done an online one 00:33:54.480 --> 00:33:56.640 it always tells me to wear pastels and i'm like 00:33:56.640 --> 00:33:58.900 nope absolutely not yeah see i'm afraid it'll 00:33:58.900 --> 00:34:01.160 tell me to wear like super bright colors yeah 00:34:01.160 --> 00:34:03.119 and it always tells me not to wear black and 00:34:03.119 --> 00:34:04.839 i'm like nope you're like That's the majority 00:34:04.839 --> 00:34:07.400 of my wardrobe. This is something I feel confident 00:34:07.400 --> 00:34:11.480 in. So yeah, that's definitely one. But oh, I 00:34:11.480 --> 00:34:14.039 feel that for sure. The whole like, what bra 00:34:14.039 --> 00:34:16.039 am I wearing today? Oh, I got to make sure it 00:34:16.039 --> 00:34:19.320 clicks off, you know? Right. And yeah. Yeah. 00:34:19.320 --> 00:34:21.159 Like last night, Stuart and I went on a date 00:34:21.159 --> 00:34:23.659 night. So I wore a non -nursing bra. But then 00:34:23.659 --> 00:34:26.000 Zeta got home and I was like, oh, I need to nurse 00:34:26.000 --> 00:34:28.900 you. And you're like, this is inconvenient. Yeah. 00:34:29.139 --> 00:34:31.559 There's a reason nursing bras exist. Yep. No, 00:34:31.760 --> 00:34:35.199 I feel that. On Tuesdays and Thursdays when I 00:34:35.199 --> 00:34:37.280 do go to work, I'm like, I still wear my nursing 00:34:37.280 --> 00:34:40.400 bra so I can pump. It's things like that where 00:34:40.400 --> 00:34:44.539 I'm like, it's just I feel not as cute as I maybe 00:34:44.539 --> 00:34:47.599 did before. Feeling cute and feeling confident 00:34:47.599 --> 00:34:49.960 is the last thing on the priority list, which 00:34:49.960 --> 00:34:51.820 then kind of sucks when it comes, again, back 00:34:51.820 --> 00:34:53.860 to the self -care thing where you're like, well, 00:34:53.940 --> 00:34:56.519 I want to feel like a human and I want to feel 00:34:56.519 --> 00:35:00.079 like someone. who's not just a mom and like feel 00:35:00.079 --> 00:35:03.159 confident in my own skin in my own body but then 00:35:03.159 --> 00:35:06.079 this like one part that I've always been able 00:35:06.079 --> 00:35:08.719 to rely on of how I dress myself and dressing 00:35:08.719 --> 00:35:12.139 myself to feel good I like can't really do that 00:35:12.139 --> 00:35:15.179 yeah at least not in the way I used to yeah and 00:35:15.179 --> 00:35:17.800 I also don't have time to figure it out no so 00:35:17.800 --> 00:35:19.360 I just kind of wear the same thing every day 00:35:19.360 --> 00:35:22.050 exactly I feel like There's probably like 10 00:35:22.050 --> 00:35:25.210 shirts that kind of are on rotation for me. Just 00:35:25.210 --> 00:35:27.389 because they're like easy choices. I know they 00:35:27.389 --> 00:35:31.110 work for like most days. Like work from home 00:35:31.110 --> 00:35:33.710 days, I'm like usually in a lounge set of some 00:35:33.710 --> 00:35:37.889 sort. And like it's just the same kind of outfits 00:35:37.889 --> 00:35:40.570 week to week, which is fine. If you leave the 00:35:40.570 --> 00:35:42.230 house, it's a baggy t -shirt and jeans. Yeah, 00:35:42.230 --> 00:35:45.389 honestly. It's like it's fine. It works for this 00:35:45.389 --> 00:35:50.869 season. I try not to complain. I feel like I'm 00:35:50.869 --> 00:35:54.170 putting in as much effort as I can at this stage 00:35:54.170 --> 00:35:58.789 of life. And I guess it just, it is what it is 00:35:58.789 --> 00:36:02.190 right now. And ultimately like, yeah, the joy, 00:36:02.409 --> 00:36:04.670 I talked about this before, like the joy I'm 00:36:04.670 --> 00:36:09.820 feeling now is so much more apparent. has increased 00:36:09.820 --> 00:36:12.800 tremendously since having kids but it is those 00:36:12.800 --> 00:36:15.579 little things that like yeah and maybe I just 00:36:15.579 --> 00:36:17.920 miss them a little bit yeah and I think it's 00:36:17.920 --> 00:36:19.920 hard because you like kind of have to take those 00:36:19.920 --> 00:36:23.559 thoughts so captive sometimes and like just not 00:36:23.559 --> 00:36:26.679 let them run away yeah where again we're like 00:36:26.679 --> 00:36:28.760 kind of going back to what I was talking about 00:36:28.760 --> 00:36:31.239 with you know Stuart and I and things we missed 00:36:31.239 --> 00:36:34.320 before marriage where like okay yeah like flirting 00:36:34.320 --> 00:36:36.579 with someone in a new relationship super fun 00:36:37.559 --> 00:36:40.900 and if you wanted to like as a married person 00:36:40.900 --> 00:36:43.280 you could let yourself like go down that path 00:36:43.280 --> 00:36:46.380 and then an affair starts yeah right and so you 00:36:46.380 --> 00:36:50.000 have to go oh yeah i do miss that okay moving 00:36:50.000 --> 00:36:52.239 on yeah i think there's a lot of those things 00:36:52.239 --> 00:36:55.219 as a mom too or like obviously you can't really 00:36:55.219 --> 00:36:59.539 just like not do things yeah but uh yeah were 00:36:59.539 --> 00:37:03.139 you to not like go into this victim spiral i 00:37:03.139 --> 00:37:06.199 guess um which is super easy to do yeah we're 00:37:06.199 --> 00:37:09.019 like wow i you know wish i was sleeping at night 00:37:09.019 --> 00:37:12.880 you're like okay yeah i do but i'm not so i just 00:37:12.880 --> 00:37:17.420 have to like go about my day and if i focus on 00:37:17.420 --> 00:37:19.400 that then it's gonna make my whole life miserable 00:37:19.400 --> 00:37:22.159 yeah and it's gonna make me resent my kids or 00:37:22.159 --> 00:37:25.599 whatever which i don't want to do yeah that's 00:37:25.599 --> 00:37:30.190 so true yeah i always feel a bit guilty because 00:37:30.190 --> 00:37:33.070 I mean, we wanted a family for so long. So when 00:37:33.070 --> 00:37:35.369 I do start to spiral or I like start to feel 00:37:35.369 --> 00:37:38.909 bad for myself or whatever, I try to like get 00:37:38.909 --> 00:37:42.130 back into the mindset of like, no, this is, you're 00:37:42.130 --> 00:37:45.489 literally living the life that you prayed for 00:37:45.489 --> 00:37:47.670 for so long and that you've desired for your 00:37:47.670 --> 00:37:51.239 entire life. And yeah, like. I never thought 00:37:51.239 --> 00:37:52.960 it was going to be all rainbows and butterflies 00:37:52.960 --> 00:37:56.699 all the time. And I knew there would be aspects 00:37:56.699 --> 00:38:00.139 of pre -kids that I would, of course, that I 00:38:00.139 --> 00:38:03.460 would miss or whatever. But yeah, that mindset 00:38:03.460 --> 00:38:07.039 shift is so important for me on the days that 00:38:07.039 --> 00:38:09.500 are extra hard or the days that I start to feel 00:38:09.500 --> 00:38:13.159 bad for myself that I can't go hang out with 00:38:13.159 --> 00:38:19.179 friends spontaneously or whatever. I have to 00:38:19.179 --> 00:38:21.059 just kind of shift my mindset. And that's the 00:38:21.059 --> 00:38:25.059 only way that I can remember the joy that I'm 00:38:25.059 --> 00:38:29.179 living in. It's especially easy to go down those 00:38:29.179 --> 00:38:31.820 kind of rabbit holes on hard days again. We both 00:38:31.820 --> 00:38:33.920 had really rough weeks, so it's really easy on 00:38:33.920 --> 00:38:37.260 a day when your kids are literally throwing their 00:38:37.260 --> 00:38:39.699 food all over the house and everyone's screaming 00:38:39.699 --> 00:38:44.340 and crying to just really desperately want things 00:38:44.340 --> 00:38:48.619 to be different. And, yeah, to have to remind 00:38:48.619 --> 00:38:51.380 yourself, like, no, this is good. Like, even 00:38:51.380 --> 00:38:53.559 though today isn't good and this moment isn't 00:38:53.559 --> 00:38:56.119 good, overall this is really good. It really 00:38:56.119 --> 00:38:58.800 is, yeah. Do you have any more that you want 00:38:58.800 --> 00:39:01.920 to add? The only other thing I had is to, like, 00:39:01.980 --> 00:39:04.360 this kind of puts a bow on this, I guess. I saw 00:39:04.360 --> 00:39:07.039 a clip this week, which was funny that this came 00:39:07.039 --> 00:39:10.000 up this week as we were preparing, of a mom saying, 00:39:10.199 --> 00:39:12.699 and, like, this is me being kind of judgy, so 00:39:12.699 --> 00:39:15.639 sorry. But it was – because I hope her kids never 00:39:15.639 --> 00:39:17.980 see this because if I heard my mom say this, 00:39:18.079 --> 00:39:20.219 I think I would be devastated. Oh, gosh. She 00:39:20.219 --> 00:39:22.280 said, I don't regret having my kids. I love my 00:39:22.280 --> 00:39:24.179 kids. I don't regret having my kids. But if I 00:39:24.179 --> 00:39:25.739 got to the end of my life and got to start over, 00:39:25.820 --> 00:39:28.860 I wouldn't have kids again. Oh, my gosh. And 00:39:28.860 --> 00:39:31.300 I just remember sitting there – again, as a child 00:39:31.300 --> 00:39:33.659 of a mom, I think if I ever heard my mom say 00:39:33.659 --> 00:39:36.300 that, I would spiral and be devastated. Yes. 00:39:36.420 --> 00:39:39.059 But as a mom, I'm like, oh, I can't relate at 00:39:39.059 --> 00:39:41.500 all. Did you like go and read the – comments 00:39:41.500 --> 00:39:43.900 or anything like that oh it was on a tv show 00:39:43.900 --> 00:39:47.679 okay yeah so yes i haven't seen like if anyone 00:39:47.679 --> 00:39:49.699 has responded to i'm sure there are comments 00:39:49.699 --> 00:39:51.960 online about it a reality tv show it was on love 00:39:51.960 --> 00:39:55.940 is blind yes okay yeah like hearing her say that 00:39:55.940 --> 00:39:59.989 i was like i cannot relate no at all at all like 00:39:59.989 --> 00:40:02.309 yes there are days when i miss not being a mom 00:40:02.309 --> 00:40:04.989 and there are days when i miss like aspects again 00:40:04.989 --> 00:40:07.590 like a lot of things we've talked about and just 00:40:07.590 --> 00:40:09.670 like not being responsible for another person 00:40:09.670 --> 00:40:12.710 yeah yeah but my kids have brought so much joy 00:40:12.710 --> 00:40:15.409 to my life and again this week was really rough 00:40:15.409 --> 00:40:18.510 like i think sewer came home to me at least in 00:40:18.510 --> 00:40:20.789 tears if not like or at least close to tears 00:40:20.789 --> 00:40:23.360 if not in tears more than once this week and 00:40:23.360 --> 00:40:26.159 i know i definitely was like not the mom that 00:40:26.159 --> 00:40:29.699 i want to be yeah but like even after weeks like 00:40:29.699 --> 00:40:32.840 this there's like the the joy that they bring 00:40:32.840 --> 00:40:35.599 and the amount of like purpose that having kids 00:40:35.599 --> 00:40:38.699 has brought i'm like no like if i get to the 00:40:38.699 --> 00:40:41.619 end of my life and i'm starting over like absolutely 00:40:41.619 --> 00:40:44.989 having kids again absolutely and Like, do we 00:40:44.989 --> 00:40:47.449 have kids sooner? I don't know. I know. No, I 00:40:47.449 --> 00:40:51.110 know. Yeah. I 100 % feel that. And I feel so 00:40:51.110 --> 00:40:53.690 bad for that woman's kids. Yeah. I mean, they 00:40:53.690 --> 00:40:56.250 were little kids. So like right now, I don't 00:40:56.250 --> 00:40:58.590 think they would register it. No. But that's 00:40:58.590 --> 00:41:01.110 sad. I don't know. That's really sad. And I hope 00:41:01.110 --> 00:41:03.409 that those of you that are listening to this, 00:41:03.449 --> 00:41:05.630 like, yeah, I feel like you can relate to this, 00:41:05.670 --> 00:41:09.510 but also feel like you don't regret having kids 00:41:09.510 --> 00:41:12.050 and that they actually bring you the biggest 00:41:12.050 --> 00:41:14.849 joy. Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. That's our biggest 00:41:14.849 --> 00:41:18.769 hope for you. And yeah, I don't know. Let us 00:41:18.769 --> 00:41:22.610 know what, what maybe you miss about pre -kids 00:41:22.610 --> 00:41:25.769 and yeah, we'll put like a question box up on 00:41:25.769 --> 00:41:29.250 Instagram and we'd love to hear what you guys 00:41:29.250 --> 00:41:32.329 miss. Maybe some, some different things that 00:41:32.329 --> 00:41:34.849 we've maybe didn't hit on. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure 00:41:34.849 --> 00:41:37.150 everyone has slightly different things. Oh yeah. 00:41:37.210 --> 00:41:41.949 Yes. Okay. Should we hop into our wins of the 00:41:41.949 --> 00:41:46.530 week? So this maybe kind of goes with this. Today, 00:41:46.650 --> 00:41:51.150 so Zeta got up. Lloyd was gone overnight. He 00:41:51.150 --> 00:41:53.929 spent the night with grandparents. And then this 00:41:53.929 --> 00:41:56.510 morning, Zeta was up at 6 a .m., of course. Love 00:41:56.510 --> 00:41:59.289 that. But Stuart grabbed her and he let me sleep 00:41:59.289 --> 00:42:02.329 till almost 8. Oh, nice. And I'm like, I don't 00:42:02.329 --> 00:42:04.070 know the last time I did that. That's amazing. 00:42:04.269 --> 00:42:07.110 And then we went out for breakfast and he was 00:42:07.110 --> 00:42:09.969 like, wow, you're in such a good mood. This is 00:42:09.969 --> 00:42:13.239 what happens when I get some sleep. and i get 00:42:13.239 --> 00:42:16.400 some good breakfast that's so good it was just 00:42:16.400 --> 00:42:19.880 it was like so refreshing and i think especially 00:42:19.880 --> 00:42:21.420 after like a really tough week where it's like 00:42:21.420 --> 00:42:24.619 i just needed like to recharge a little bit even 00:42:24.619 --> 00:42:27.199 if it was just you know an extra couple hours 00:42:27.199 --> 00:42:30.000 of sleep and yeah not to have to make and clean 00:42:30.000 --> 00:42:34.039 up breakfast and that's so nice i wasn't just 00:42:34.039 --> 00:42:36.460 sleeping in and having a good breakfast good 00:42:36.460 --> 00:42:40.940 okay my win is like it's super simple but I feel 00:42:40.940 --> 00:42:44.639 like there was like just a shift one day. So 00:42:44.639 --> 00:42:47.699 Colt has been, I mean, he's been kind of into 00:42:47.699 --> 00:42:50.800 art a little bit and painting and coloring and 00:42:50.800 --> 00:42:53.159 stuff. And I feel like literally in the last 00:42:53.159 --> 00:42:55.519 week or so, it's just like shifted where now 00:42:55.519 --> 00:42:57.760 he starts to try to like color in the lines. 00:42:58.260 --> 00:43:01.039 Where it's like rather than just like all over 00:43:01.039 --> 00:43:03.199 the page he's coloring, he's like seeing the 00:43:03.199 --> 00:43:06.000 objects on the page and like trying. Like obviously 00:43:06.000 --> 00:43:08.250 it's not. Right. He's still doing that. Yeah. 00:43:08.349 --> 00:43:11.150 And it's like full fist around the crayon. Love 00:43:11.150 --> 00:43:14.190 it. But he's like trying to color the objects 00:43:14.190 --> 00:43:16.269 now. That's so fun. And I just think that's so 00:43:16.269 --> 00:43:18.989 cute because he's so focused and is just like. 00:43:19.289 --> 00:43:21.710 I love a little kid being focused on something. 00:43:21.949 --> 00:43:22.530 It's keeping his attention. Yeah. He's like got 00:43:22.530 --> 00:43:24.349 his face super close to the paper. Does he do 00:43:24.349 --> 00:43:27.230 the tongue thing? He doesn't. No. Lloyd does 00:43:27.230 --> 00:43:29.389 the tongue thing. That's so cute. When he's focused, 00:43:29.489 --> 00:43:32.110 he sticks out his tongue. That's so cute. No, 00:43:32.190 --> 00:43:33.710 he doesn't do the tongue thing, but it's just 00:43:33.710 --> 00:43:37.429 like. the attention span has kind of like grown 00:43:37.429 --> 00:43:41.170 a little bit and he's just like focused on one 00:43:41.170 --> 00:43:43.889 task and and it's so fun to see the things that 00:43:43.889 --> 00:43:47.409 like capture that focus too yeah like lloyd is 00:43:47.409 --> 00:43:49.349 not really interested in coloring yeah sometimes 00:43:49.349 --> 00:43:51.809 we'll pull it out but there are other things 00:43:51.809 --> 00:43:53.949 that i'm like oh you could focus on that for 00:43:53.949 --> 00:43:58.829 hours yeah and it's yeah just to see their personalities 00:43:58.829 --> 00:44:00.610 and the things that matter and the things that 00:44:00.610 --> 00:44:03.250 like do capture their attention is so much fun 00:44:03.250 --> 00:44:06.030 i love it because so now i like in our kitchen 00:44:07.130 --> 00:44:09.730 I like did a little, it was actually my nursing 00:44:09.730 --> 00:44:11.750 cart that I'm like, oh, I don't really need this 00:44:11.750 --> 00:44:13.909 anymore. So we turn it into an art cart. That's 00:44:13.909 --> 00:44:15.690 fun. So now it's got all his art supplies on 00:44:15.690 --> 00:44:17.909 it in the kitchen. So then he can just pull out 00:44:17.909 --> 00:44:20.469 whatever he wants whenever. But it's art and 00:44:20.469 --> 00:44:23.610 then magnet tiles for him that can like capture 00:44:23.610 --> 00:44:26.269 his attention for a little bit. And I love that 00:44:26.269 --> 00:44:29.789 he's just so creative and it's just super fun 00:44:29.789 --> 00:44:33.429 to watch his little mind grow. And I just, yeah, 00:44:33.530 --> 00:44:36.340 I cannot believe that. I mean, we have two and 00:44:36.340 --> 00:44:38.559 a half year olds that. I know. Like you're going 00:44:38.559 --> 00:44:41.219 to be three this year. It's crazy. I hate it. 00:44:41.260 --> 00:44:43.760 It's going by too fast. And it's so fun. Yeah, 00:44:43.800 --> 00:44:46.320 it's so fun. Well, thanks for tuning in today, 00:44:46.400 --> 00:44:49.500 guys. Yeah, let us know what you miss in your 00:44:49.500 --> 00:44:53.860 old life pre -kids. But we'll see you guys next 00:44:53.860 --> 00:44:56.840 week. See you next week. Well, that's enough 00:44:56.840 --> 00:44:59.440 oversharing for today. If you enjoyed hanging 00:44:59.440 --> 00:45:01.440 out with us, hit subscribe so you don't miss 00:45:01.440 --> 00:45:04.309 the next round of chaos. And if you're listening 00:45:04.309 --> 00:45:05.989 while hiding in the bathroom from your kids, 00:45:06.150 --> 00:45:08.710 no judgment, we see you. Thanks for joining us 00:45:08.710 --> 00:45:12.210 on No Manual Momcast, where motherhood is messy. 00:45:12.610 --> 00:45:31.699 At least we can laugh about it together. Chocolate 00:45:31.699 --> 00:45:33.179 chip cookie. That's so cute.