WEBVTT 00:00:12.940 --> 00:00:15.019 Motherhood, where sleep is a rumor and laundry 00:00:15.019 --> 00:00:17.519 is eternal. And somehow, we're supposed to be 00:00:17.519 --> 00:00:20.000 raising tiny humans through it all. We're here 00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.839 to laugh at the chaos, cry when necessary, and 00:00:22.839 --> 00:00:25.079 remind you that none of us actually know what 00:00:25.079 --> 00:00:28.219 we're doing. This is No Manual, a momcast. Your 00:00:28.219 --> 00:00:30.120 mom friend group chat, but with microphones. 00:00:30.579 --> 00:00:33.520 Well, welcome back to No Manual, a momcast. We're 00:00:33.520 --> 00:00:34.939 just kind of getting back in the swing of things 00:00:34.939 --> 00:00:38.899 for the new year. And our super fun episode today 00:00:38.899 --> 00:00:42.820 is about sleep regression. Yes. And if you are 00:00:42.820 --> 00:00:44.679 looking for an episode that has any information. 00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:47.939 This is not the one. This is not the place for 00:00:47.939 --> 00:00:50.700 you. If you are looking for two moms who are 00:00:50.700 --> 00:00:54.439 very frustrated with sleep regression and exhausted 00:00:54.439 --> 00:00:58.880 and need someone to complain with. This is our 00:00:58.880 --> 00:01:01.880 vent sesh. You are in the right place for sure. 00:01:02.179 --> 00:01:04.640 So true. Because that's just where we're at. 00:01:04.719 --> 00:01:06.959 We have no information, but we're both very tired. 00:01:08.159 --> 00:01:10.219 With that, do you want to start with your mom 00:01:10.219 --> 00:01:13.840 moment? I would love to. So like you said, we're 00:01:13.840 --> 00:01:16.000 just kind of getting back in the swing of things 00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.579 with the new year, traveled over the holidays. 00:01:19.299 --> 00:01:22.859 So this last week was. Our first week, like trying 00:01:22.859 --> 00:01:25.900 to hop back into work, like get our routine back 00:01:25.900 --> 00:01:30.760 to normal and our kind of routine. So I work 00:01:30.760 --> 00:01:32.780 from home two days a week and then I go into 00:01:32.780 --> 00:01:35.019 the office two days a week and we have child 00:01:35.019 --> 00:01:37.480 care for those two days that comes to our house. 00:01:37.760 --> 00:01:40.819 And so all that to say, like Colt, honestly, 00:01:40.939 --> 00:01:43.219 we don't really get out of the house very much 00:01:43.219 --> 00:01:46.730 during the week other than like. quick walks 00:01:46.730 --> 00:01:50.790 or like target pickup orders, things like that. 00:01:51.069 --> 00:01:53.450 We're not really going to a lot of places except 00:01:53.450 --> 00:01:56.109 on the weekends. And so this last week I felt 00:01:56.109 --> 00:02:00.969 really bad because on Thursday I realized that 00:02:00.969 --> 00:02:04.430 Colt had not left the house since Sunday. And 00:02:04.430 --> 00:02:07.390 I was like, oh my gosh, like I just, I don't 00:02:07.390 --> 00:02:09.590 know. I felt bad because I'm like, he's probably 00:02:09.590 --> 00:02:12.310 feeling really, like, just antsy. Yeah, stir 00:02:12.310 --> 00:02:16.710 crazy. Stir crazy, like I would, for sure. Like, 00:02:16.789 --> 00:02:20.310 we literally, like, we didn't go anywhere. Like, 00:02:20.409 --> 00:02:22.949 yeah, he'd played outside, like, things like 00:02:22.949 --> 00:02:26.419 that, but we didn't drive anywhere. And so on 00:02:26.419 --> 00:02:29.139 Thursday, once I got home from work, I was like, 00:02:29.219 --> 00:02:31.400 oh, we need like we got to go somewhere tonight. 00:02:31.580 --> 00:02:33.300 I was like, whether we go to like Chick -fil 00:02:33.300 --> 00:02:35.639 -A or something, we can go play on the play place. 00:02:35.719 --> 00:02:38.659 We did that last night. Nice. Like that is a 00:02:38.659 --> 00:02:41.520 frequent place for us. It's a good one. Costco. 00:02:41.800 --> 00:02:43.919 I was like, we need to do a Costco run anyways. 00:02:44.259 --> 00:02:47.539 So we ended up going to Costco. But before that, 00:02:47.620 --> 00:02:50.199 I was like, hey, Colt, like. We haven't been 00:02:50.199 --> 00:02:51.719 out of the house all week. Do you want to go 00:02:51.719 --> 00:02:53.500 somewhere? Do you want to go somewhere or do 00:02:53.500 --> 00:02:55.319 you want to stay home? And he goes, stay home. 00:02:56.060 --> 00:02:59.360 I'm like, oh, you. You actually don't care. You're 00:02:59.360 --> 00:03:01.759 just happy. Yeah. I mean, for a little kid, if 00:03:01.759 --> 00:03:03.979 you're getting outside. Yeah, that's kind of 00:03:03.979 --> 00:03:06.879 like an outing, I guess. And he was like, it 00:03:06.879 --> 00:03:08.780 was a pretty nice week for the most part. Yeah, 00:03:08.780 --> 00:03:09.639 it's been a really nice few weeks. And so we 00:03:09.639 --> 00:03:12.620 played outside every single day. And he like, 00:03:12.759 --> 00:03:14.659 I mean, he has all his new toys from Christmas. 00:03:14.719 --> 00:03:17.099 And so he's just like been building with his 00:03:17.099 --> 00:03:19.300 magnet tiles a ton. Living his best life. Yeah. 00:03:19.560 --> 00:03:22.860 But then I was like, no, we like. We've got to 00:03:22.860 --> 00:03:24.979 get out of the house. And so we did go to Costco 00:03:24.979 --> 00:03:27.500 and then we had dinner at Costco. As you should. 00:03:27.659 --> 00:03:30.539 As you, obviously. But I don't think we'd ever, 00:03:30.659 --> 00:03:33.280 like sometimes we'll like grab it and take it 00:03:33.280 --> 00:03:36.360 home. But we like sat there for dinner and it 00:03:36.360 --> 00:03:40.090 just. Colt was like thriving. He had the best 00:03:40.090 --> 00:03:43.270 time, like ate his pizza, ate some of Michael's 00:03:43.270 --> 00:03:47.729 hot dog, just was so happy to be there. And then 00:03:47.729 --> 00:03:49.509 we get back in the car and I'm like, buddy, did 00:03:49.509 --> 00:03:52.289 you have the best time? He's like, yes. Like 00:03:52.289 --> 00:03:54.090 he just had the, like the best day of his life. 00:03:54.509 --> 00:03:57.669 I mean, Costco's the best. Yeah. Lloyd also asks 00:03:57.669 --> 00:04:00.229 to go to Costco. Nice. So I'm like, we're doing 00:04:00.229 --> 00:04:02.110 something right. Yeah. And now that they've switched 00:04:02.110 --> 00:04:04.610 from Pepsi products to Coke products, I'm actually 00:04:04.610 --> 00:04:08.530 very happy about that too. Yeah. So it was super 00:04:08.530 --> 00:04:10.969 fun. That's great. Just a trip to Costco. Sometimes 00:04:10.969 --> 00:04:13.250 that's all you need. Honestly. What about you? 00:04:13.289 --> 00:04:16.829 So this will go well with our theme today. But 00:04:16.829 --> 00:04:21.839 yeah, same thing. We, I had like. almost a full 00:04:21.839 --> 00:04:24.360 two weeks off from the week of christmas until 00:04:24.360 --> 00:04:27.139 you know the week of new year's and then didn't 00:04:27.139 --> 00:04:29.060 go back to work till the monday after new year's 00:04:29.060 --> 00:04:32.319 okay and so and that was this past monday from 00:04:32.319 --> 00:04:37.639 when we're recording so go back to work and we've 00:04:37.639 --> 00:04:39.600 had some like rough sleep situations for the 00:04:39.600 --> 00:04:43.339 past couple months the weekend before zaya slept 00:04:43.339 --> 00:04:47.459 11 hours straight two nights in a row oh never 00:04:47.459 --> 00:04:50.439 have made it we've made it i mean i wasn't holding 00:04:50.439 --> 00:04:52.720 my breath yeah so i was like okay i'm not like 00:04:52.720 --> 00:04:54.839 first of all not telling a single person i told 00:04:54.839 --> 00:04:56.939 stewart which doesn't count um but i was like 00:04:56.939 --> 00:04:59.699 not telling if my mom asks she doesn't she doesn't 00:04:59.699 --> 00:05:01.699 need to know this no no one needs to know this 00:05:01.699 --> 00:05:04.199 because no way am i jinxing this second i tell 00:05:04.199 --> 00:05:07.509 someone it jinxes it yeah um but i was also like 00:05:07.509 --> 00:05:09.949 listen i'm not holding out hope that like this 00:05:09.949 --> 00:05:12.310 is our new normal but this means we're in the 00:05:12.310 --> 00:05:14.589 right direction right like maybe you know 11 00:05:14.589 --> 00:05:16.290 hours isn't gonna be the new normal but maybe 00:05:16.290 --> 00:05:18.189 we're gonna get some like good eight hour stretches 00:05:18.189 --> 00:05:20.529 or something yes then go back to work monday 00:05:20.529 --> 00:05:26.149 that was fine and then monday night slash tuesday 00:05:26.149 --> 00:05:28.129 morning she wakes up at the middle of the night 00:05:28.129 --> 00:05:32.839 fine she's not going back down finally like i 00:05:32.839 --> 00:05:36.000 go back to bed and stewart takes over and i'm 00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:39.939 just like so cold like bundled up in blankets 00:05:39.939 --> 00:05:42.720 and so cold and i'm like i'm getting sick like 00:05:42.720 --> 00:05:45.980 you just you know that sick cold you know it's 00:05:45.980 --> 00:05:49.240 like oh it's not that the room is cold i could 00:05:49.240 --> 00:05:53.720 have a fire under me and be bundled in 27 blankets 00:05:53.720 --> 00:05:56.699 and i'd still be freezing right now so i was 00:05:56.699 --> 00:05:59.750 like I'm getting sick. I just need to get some 00:05:59.750 --> 00:06:02.810 sleep. Like if only the 11 hours straight could 00:06:02.810 --> 00:06:05.250 have happened. Happened tonight. Yeah. So I'm 00:06:05.250 --> 00:06:08.649 like, okay, I'll be fine. Tuesday, I could like 00:06:08.649 --> 00:06:10.430 kind of feel it coming on. But I was like, I'm 00:06:10.430 --> 00:06:13.310 just going to drink some extra tea, extra, you 00:06:13.310 --> 00:06:16.610 know, liquid IV, whatever. Try to kick this. 00:06:16.990 --> 00:06:20.029 And then go to bed. Like I'll try to go to bed 00:06:20.029 --> 00:06:23.470 kind of early. Yeah. And make this happen. You 00:06:23.470 --> 00:06:25.329 know, like just get some sleep and then I'll 00:06:25.329 --> 00:06:29.060 be fine. And then Tuesday night, same thing happens. 00:06:29.160 --> 00:06:32.379 She was up for so many hours. Like maybe it wasn't 00:06:32.379 --> 00:06:34.360 that many. It felt like a long time. She only 00:06:34.360 --> 00:06:36.379 woke up once, but she just like would not go 00:06:36.379 --> 00:06:39.360 back down. Was just so awake. And. Was she upset 00:06:39.360 --> 00:06:42.500 or was she just like, she's just wide awake? 00:06:42.680 --> 00:06:45.540 She, if you're holding her, she's just wide awake. 00:06:45.699 --> 00:06:48.220 Yeah. Second, you put her in her crib, not having 00:06:48.220 --> 00:06:50.360 it. And of course, since her and Lloyd share 00:06:50.360 --> 00:06:52.480 a room right now, I'm like not going to risk 00:06:52.480 --> 00:06:53.899 waking Lloyd up because that's going to ruin 00:06:53.899 --> 00:06:56.779 everyone's day. So I was like, okay. It's Wednesday. 00:06:57.040 --> 00:06:59.180 I've been back to work for a whole two days now. 00:07:00.180 --> 00:07:03.699 I'm just going to call in sick because I feel 00:07:03.699 --> 00:07:06.680 like absolute garbage. But also like if I could 00:07:06.680 --> 00:07:08.459 just get through today, get a good nap when the 00:07:08.459 --> 00:07:11.060 kids are napping, I should be good. So I call 00:07:11.060 --> 00:07:13.579 in sick, do that whole thing. Actually, both 00:07:13.579 --> 00:07:16.639 kids ended up going back to sleep till like maybe 00:07:16.639 --> 00:07:20.040 730. So I got like a couple hours of sleep, phoned 00:07:20.040 --> 00:07:24.430 it in, got McDonald's breakfast. I think lunch 00:07:24.430 --> 00:07:27.350 was like just snacks kind of thing. And I was 00:07:27.350 --> 00:07:30.829 like, okay, I just need them to nap. Yeah. And 00:07:30.829 --> 00:07:34.790 Zeta slept for maybe an hour, not consecutively, 00:07:34.829 --> 00:07:39.170 not with. At the same time. Yeah, not at the 00:07:39.170 --> 00:07:41.730 same time. Lloyd didn't nap at all. Dang it. 00:07:42.029 --> 00:07:45.029 And I was just getting so frustrated. I swear 00:07:45.029 --> 00:07:47.430 there's some curse of being a mom that like the 00:07:47.430 --> 00:07:51.149 second you're sick, no one else sleeps. Because 00:07:51.149 --> 00:07:54.930 Lloyd, or no. Because Stuart gets sick and everyone 00:07:54.930 --> 00:07:57.889 sleeps just fine. But anytime I'm sick. It's 00:07:57.889 --> 00:08:00.089 like they know. It's like they know. So thankfully. 00:08:00.310 --> 00:08:02.230 Oh, yeah. That was the other piece of this. So 00:08:02.230 --> 00:08:05.110 typically we have my parents watch the kids one 00:08:05.110 --> 00:08:07.870 day a week. Starting next week, we're going to 00:08:07.870 --> 00:08:10.310 have my parents one day a week and then Stuart's 00:08:10.310 --> 00:08:12.430 mom one day a week. So we'll have two days of 00:08:12.430 --> 00:08:15.069 child care. Nice. But this week, the first week 00:08:15.069 --> 00:08:17.399 of the year. My parents were out of town on their 00:08:17.399 --> 00:08:19.060 35th wedding anniversary. So they were like, 00:08:19.100 --> 00:08:20.399 hey, we can't watch the kids, which is like. 00:08:20.660 --> 00:08:23.600 Totally fine. That's fine. Happy for them. Not 00:08:23.600 --> 00:08:25.879 a big deal. And then my mother -in -law was like, 00:08:25.959 --> 00:08:29.060 because she went from retiring at the end of 00:08:29.060 --> 00:08:31.399 the year to helping us with the kids once a week. 00:08:31.439 --> 00:08:33.279 She's like, I just want to take a week. We're 00:08:33.279 --> 00:08:34.759 like, don't have any commitments. We're like, 00:08:34.879 --> 00:08:37.019 sure. Again, not a big deal. Like, it's just 00:08:37.019 --> 00:08:40.039 one week. But of course, it's the week that I 00:08:40.039 --> 00:08:43.950 got sick that no one was around. yeah that no 00:08:43.950 --> 00:08:46.990 one's sleeping so i just need some help thankfully 00:08:46.990 --> 00:08:49.970 stewart did end up coming home early from work 00:08:49.970 --> 00:08:51.970 when the kids weren't sleeping and he's like 00:08:51.970 --> 00:08:54.149 you just go take a nap and i think i napped for 00:08:54.149 --> 00:08:56.990 two hours still continue to get sick as you can 00:08:56.990 --> 00:09:01.049 hear me like not being able to breathe um but 00:09:01.049 --> 00:09:03.490 yeah like what is this curse of being a mom it's 00:09:03.490 --> 00:09:07.730 second like you're sick everyone's like no no 00:09:07.730 --> 00:09:11.919 sleep no naps no nothing Being sick, like I thought 00:09:11.919 --> 00:09:15.100 being sick was terrible before kids. With kids, 00:09:15.220 --> 00:09:20.139 it is just the absolute worst. The absolute worst. 00:09:20.379 --> 00:09:23.500 And I never want my kids to be sick, but being 00:09:23.500 --> 00:09:27.340 sick when they're healthy. I would rather them 00:09:27.340 --> 00:09:29.080 be sick. Like that sounds bad. Not that I want 00:09:29.080 --> 00:09:31.879 my kids to be sick, but it's so much easier to 00:09:31.879 --> 00:09:34.240 take care of a sick kid than it is to be sick 00:09:34.240 --> 00:09:36.460 and take care of a healthy kid. Yes. Or a sick 00:09:36.460 --> 00:09:39.960 kid. Absolutely. Yeah. Well, speaking of torture, 00:09:40.200 --> 00:09:46.879 let's talk about sleep in general and just what 00:09:46.879 --> 00:09:50.970 does sleep look like, I guess, for... for you 00:09:50.970 --> 00:09:53.009 guys. It sounds like, I mean, you've had some 00:09:53.009 --> 00:09:56.830 good stretches. Yeah. What was it? I guess let's 00:09:56.830 --> 00:09:59.210 go back to Lloyd. Like when Lloyd was a baby. 00:09:59.629 --> 00:10:04.230 So Lloyd, he like, now I need to think back. 00:10:04.309 --> 00:10:06.309 I feel like he wasn't like a terrible sleeper. 00:10:06.309 --> 00:10:09.429 He wasn't like a good sleeper. And part of it 00:10:09.429 --> 00:10:13.809 was first kid. We were like, we are not co -sleeping. 00:10:14.000 --> 00:10:16.799 absolutely not yeah and then we ended up co -sleeping 00:10:16.799 --> 00:10:18.940 so but we tried for a long time not to because 00:10:18.940 --> 00:10:20.360 we had been like we're not gonna do this we're 00:10:20.360 --> 00:10:22.919 not gonna do this but then That just made everyone's 00:10:22.919 --> 00:10:25.039 sleep worse because Lloyd wouldn't sleep and 00:10:25.039 --> 00:10:28.539 that meant I wouldn't sleep. And then Stuart 00:10:28.539 --> 00:10:30.539 went back to work and he also works a physical 00:10:30.539 --> 00:10:32.919 job with lots of power tools. So I'm like, I 00:10:32.919 --> 00:10:36.080 want you to sleep. He needs to sleep. I do not 00:10:36.080 --> 00:10:37.980 want you to lose an arm or your life. Thank you. 00:10:38.340 --> 00:10:40.320 So it was really rough. And then we ended up 00:10:40.320 --> 00:10:43.179 co -sleeping and that helped. When we ended up 00:10:43.179 --> 00:10:46.360 getting him in his crib, we did. I nursed to 00:10:46.360 --> 00:10:49.259 sleep for a long time. And then it got to the 00:10:49.259 --> 00:10:50.879 point where I was the only one who could get 00:10:50.879 --> 00:10:52.899 him to sleep. It's really like, we got to stop 00:10:52.899 --> 00:10:56.759 that. And we did do the taking care of babies. 00:10:56.980 --> 00:10:59.659 Yeah. And that helped for a while. Actually, 00:10:59.679 --> 00:11:02.649 I think. It worked for Lloyd, to be honest. And 00:11:02.649 --> 00:11:06.049 I actually started with naps, which is not what's 00:11:06.049 --> 00:11:07.950 recommended. But that's where we were like struggling 00:11:07.950 --> 00:11:11.450 is he would just thirst for like an hour to nap. 00:11:11.669 --> 00:11:14.049 Oh, gosh. And at that point, I had gone back 00:11:14.049 --> 00:11:16.330 to work. And I was like, I can't do it. I can't 00:11:16.330 --> 00:11:19.350 nurse you for an hour and try to work. And yeah, 00:11:19.389 --> 00:11:22.649 so that didn't work. But he still woke up probably 00:11:22.649 --> 00:11:26.409 twice a night till he was like maybe nine months 00:11:26.409 --> 00:11:30.769 old. And then he still woke up. once a night 00:11:30.769 --> 00:11:34.350 i don't remember the exact timeline because i 00:11:34.350 --> 00:11:37.330 know at one point he started sleeping through 00:11:37.330 --> 00:11:39.789 the night and then he stopped and we couldn't 00:11:39.789 --> 00:11:42.470 figure out why and then we found out i was pregnant 00:11:42.470 --> 00:11:45.149 and my milk supply had dropped so we were like 00:11:45.149 --> 00:11:48.029 oh he's not getting full he's hungry yeah yeah 00:11:48.029 --> 00:11:50.549 um and at that point we introduced whole milk 00:11:50.549 --> 00:11:55.039 for him like the at night And I know he hadn't 00:11:55.039 --> 00:11:58.240 hit one yet because then I like told our pediatrician 00:11:58.240 --> 00:11:59.519 all of that. He was like, yeah, that's what I 00:11:59.519 --> 00:12:02.500 would have recommended anyways. And it fixed 00:12:02.500 --> 00:12:04.700 his like not sleeping through the night. So he 00:12:04.700 --> 00:12:06.559 must have started sleeping through the night 00:12:06.559 --> 00:12:10.259 like 10 -ish months, something like that. But 00:12:10.259 --> 00:12:12.720 for the most part, with like some exceptions, 00:12:13.100 --> 00:12:16.279 he would like wake up, eat, go back to sleep, 00:12:16.419 --> 00:12:19.340 which honestly for me, like I'm fine with that. 00:12:19.980 --> 00:12:23.399 Yeah. I don't want to be woken up multiple times 00:12:23.399 --> 00:12:25.639 a night or at all at night if I can help it. 00:12:25.740 --> 00:12:28.419 But if it's like a quick like feed you, you go 00:12:28.419 --> 00:12:31.340 back to sleep. Yeah. I can hang with that. Yep. 00:12:32.440 --> 00:12:34.879 Zeta started sleeping through the night very 00:12:34.879 --> 00:12:38.700 quickly. But because she was so little, they 00:12:38.700 --> 00:12:41.700 wanted me to wake her up. Yeah. And I like that. 00:12:41.700 --> 00:12:44.679 That might be worse. Yeah. I mean, and to be 00:12:44.679 --> 00:12:46.860 fair, it worked out fairly well in that like 00:12:46.860 --> 00:12:49.460 I could wake her up just enough to feed her and 00:12:49.460 --> 00:12:51.419 then put her back down. And like, obviously, 00:12:51.480 --> 00:12:54.919 I don't know. But part of me is like, do we have 00:12:54.919 --> 00:12:58.299 sleep issues now because of that? Like if we 00:12:58.299 --> 00:12:59.879 had just like wrote out her sleeping through 00:12:59.879 --> 00:13:02.899 the night, would she still be sleeping through 00:13:02.899 --> 00:13:05.139 that night now? Or would we still be running 00:13:05.139 --> 00:13:07.559 into that? Like what kind of habit, I guess, 00:13:07.559 --> 00:13:12.490 was kind of naturally formed? not that it was 00:13:12.490 --> 00:13:16.149 on yeah it was kind of what you had to do i guess 00:13:16.149 --> 00:13:19.330 so obviously i have no idea um you know i don't 00:13:19.330 --> 00:13:21.649 have like a parallel timeline that i can look 00:13:21.649 --> 00:13:26.950 at but yeah yeah so now she is 11 months old 00:13:26.950 --> 00:13:30.149 and still wakes up at least once a night to feed 00:13:30.149 --> 00:13:33.110 and she just like fights going back down is like 00:13:33.110 --> 00:13:36.690 the biggest issue is and we still nurse to sleep 00:13:36.690 --> 00:13:40.440 so i'm like oh I want to try to like start weeding 00:13:40.440 --> 00:13:42.659 her at a year old. And I don't know how we're 00:13:42.659 --> 00:13:47.000 going to do that. Oh, gosh. Yeah. I am entirely 00:13:47.000 --> 00:13:49.919 in the same boat as you are. Our sleep looks 00:13:49.919 --> 00:13:54.740 a little different. So with Colt. both of my 00:13:54.740 --> 00:13:56.960 kids are terrible sleepers let me just start 00:13:56.960 --> 00:14:00.000 with that at least in my head they are i'm sure 00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:02.019 there's moms out there that have worse sleepers 00:14:02.019 --> 00:14:04.419 i don't know the stories you tell me i feel like 00:14:04.419 --> 00:14:08.159 are yeah pretty rough so colt was never really 00:14:08.159 --> 00:14:11.240 has never really been a great sleeper i think 00:14:11.240 --> 00:14:13.980 as like an infant i think we would get like three 00:14:13.980 --> 00:14:16.059 hour stretches, like right at the beginning, 00:14:16.159 --> 00:14:19.460 maybe the longest stretch I had gotten was like 00:14:19.460 --> 00:14:22.019 five hours. And I think I felt like glorious 00:14:22.019 --> 00:14:25.919 after a five hour stretch. And then we hit, I 00:14:25.919 --> 00:14:27.960 think it was like the four month sleep regression. 00:14:28.080 --> 00:14:30.559 I think it hit him a little bit late, like around 00:14:30.559 --> 00:14:34.159 five or six months. And he was up like, I'm not 00:14:34.159 --> 00:14:36.700 even kidding, every single hour of the night. 00:14:36.940 --> 00:14:40.190 And that's when we started co -sleeping. And 00:14:40.190 --> 00:14:42.850 I was the same way where I was like, we're not 00:14:42.850 --> 00:14:46.350 going to co -sleep. There was like a few times 00:14:46.350 --> 00:14:48.789 where I like accidentally fell asleep while feeding 00:14:48.789 --> 00:14:53.129 him. And so then originally like when we had 00:14:53.129 --> 00:14:56.029 Colt, we lived with one of our coworkers. And 00:14:56.029 --> 00:14:59.899 so I would like. I sometimes nurse him in the 00:14:59.899 --> 00:15:01.860 room, but I would actually like physically go 00:15:01.860 --> 00:15:04.600 out to the living room and like change Colt out 00:15:04.600 --> 00:15:07.080 there and feed him in the recliner out there. 00:15:07.100 --> 00:15:08.779 Because the recliner, it wouldn't fit in our 00:15:08.779 --> 00:15:12.580 room. And like feed him out there and like purposefully 00:15:12.580 --> 00:15:15.399 stay awake as much as possible. Right. And then 00:15:15.399 --> 00:15:18.039 that kind of dropped off as like that regression 00:15:18.039 --> 00:15:21.559 hit. And we were like, I just need, we need sleep 00:15:21.559 --> 00:15:24.039 so badly. I need the 20 minute increments I can 00:15:24.039 --> 00:15:26.919 get. Yeah. And so we started co -sleeping with 00:15:26.919 --> 00:15:30.970 Colt. And then we like co -slept mostly full 00:15:30.970 --> 00:15:35.850 time with him until I found out I was pregnant 00:15:35.850 --> 00:15:40.610 with Cruz and my supply dipped a ton, like almost 00:15:40.610 --> 00:15:45.039 to nothing. And Cole actually like. started to 00:15:45.039 --> 00:15:47.320 not like it like he would like oh interesting 00:15:47.320 --> 00:15:49.320 he would like try it and then he would like be 00:15:49.320 --> 00:15:52.120 like repulsed by it I think the taste of it changed 00:15:52.120 --> 00:15:54.360 or something that's super which can happen yeah 00:15:54.360 --> 00:15:56.600 I didn't I don't think we had that experience 00:15:56.600 --> 00:15:59.000 yeah I don't remember Lloyd like being repulsed 00:15:59.000 --> 00:16:01.460 or anything but I know my supply definitely dropped 00:16:01.460 --> 00:16:04.080 and it was like oh this explains a lot yes and 00:16:04.080 --> 00:16:06.259 so I like tried to keep up with pumping but I 00:16:06.259 --> 00:16:09.820 just was like not not making as much and so we 00:16:09.820 --> 00:16:12.840 really um started tapping into using formula 00:16:12.840 --> 00:16:16.879 which I think helped helped a bit with sleep 00:16:16.879 --> 00:16:20.500 like those stretches I remember but I was at 00:16:20.500 --> 00:16:22.379 the point like the first trimester where I'm 00:16:22.379 --> 00:16:25.500 so exhausted all the time no matter how much 00:16:25.500 --> 00:16:27.460 sleep I got I just felt like I'd been hit by 00:16:27.460 --> 00:16:31.200 a truck and that is when we decided I think it 00:16:31.200 --> 00:16:34.919 was like two days it was on my birthday which 00:16:34.919 --> 00:16:37.899 is two days before colt's birthday so i remember 00:16:37.899 --> 00:16:41.679 on my birthday we did the first night of sleep 00:16:41.679 --> 00:16:45.799 training we did taking care of babies and that 00:16:45.799 --> 00:16:48.940 first night was torture for me of like letting 00:16:48.940 --> 00:16:53.500 him cry like it's the 5 10 15 yeah but i think 00:16:53.500 --> 00:16:56.759 colt cried for 50 minutes before he finally fell 00:16:56.759 --> 00:16:59.000 asleep and i legit told michael i was like i 00:16:59.000 --> 00:17:02.669 have to go outside and let I let him do it. Yeah. 00:17:02.769 --> 00:17:04.930 But I went outside and I like played with the 00:17:04.930 --> 00:17:07.769 dog for 50 minutes. And then I would have Michael 00:17:07.769 --> 00:17:10.349 like text me updates like, oh, he's asleep or 00:17:10.349 --> 00:17:14.250 nope, still crying. And so I just like couldn't 00:17:14.250 --> 00:17:16.190 hear it. I think I put my AirPods in or something. 00:17:16.730 --> 00:17:19.730 But then like Colt's sleep significantly got 00:17:19.730 --> 00:17:23.029 better. Like he started that first night of sleep 00:17:23.029 --> 00:17:25.049 training. Yes, he cried for 50 minutes, but then 00:17:25.049 --> 00:17:27.910 he slept for 10 hours. And that was the first 00:17:27.910 --> 00:17:30.490 time he'd ever done that. in his entire life 00:17:30.490 --> 00:17:33.809 and so i was like oh my gosh we just we made 00:17:33.809 --> 00:17:39.130 it yeah and going from split up sleep to like 00:17:39.130 --> 00:17:41.930 yeah even an eight hour stretch oh my gosh 10 00:17:41.930 --> 00:17:44.309 hours you're like oh my gosh it was so glorious 00:17:44.309 --> 00:17:48.170 and then yeah we it significantly got better 00:17:48.170 --> 00:17:51.349 and he was doing like pretty much sleeping through 00:17:51.349 --> 00:17:53.529 the night from, I think it was like 8 p .m. to 00:17:53.529 --> 00:17:56.170 6 .30 was kind of our like. That's great. Yeah. 00:17:56.190 --> 00:17:58.690 And yeah, he had a couple like bad nights here 00:17:58.690 --> 00:18:00.769 and there where we'd like go in and comfort him. 00:18:00.890 --> 00:18:03.130 And we kind of like weaned away from like the 00:18:03.130 --> 00:18:05.730 letting him cry, you know, figure it out in the 00:18:05.730 --> 00:18:07.990 night, like starting the 5, 10, 15 in the night 00:18:07.990 --> 00:18:11.250 too. But we would like in certain cases, yeah, 00:18:11.250 --> 00:18:13.130 we'd pick him up out of the crib and we'd like. 00:18:13.150 --> 00:18:16.210 Well, I mean, there's also this level of me for 00:18:16.210 --> 00:18:18.640 me where I think about it. Like I have nights 00:18:18.640 --> 00:18:20.440 where I just like don't sleep well too. Yeah. 00:18:20.519 --> 00:18:24.000 Like no really explanation to it. Yeah. Like 00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:26.759 I'm sure if someone like did diagnostics on my 00:18:26.759 --> 00:18:28.240 body, they would be able to tell me why. But 00:18:28.240 --> 00:18:30.599 in my head, I just had a bad night of sleep. 00:18:31.200 --> 00:18:35.759 Yeah, absolutely. So we ended up moving out of 00:18:35.759 --> 00:18:39.059 our co -worker's house. I think Colt was like 00:18:39.059 --> 00:18:43.000 13 months and moved into our own place. And his 00:18:43.000 --> 00:18:45.519 sleep kind of like dipped a little bit then. 00:18:45.799 --> 00:18:49.599 We would have to. rock him to sleep or, and we 00:18:49.599 --> 00:18:52.660 just like made it work. We kind of made it up 00:18:52.660 --> 00:18:55.480 as we went, which maybe isn't great. Like the 00:18:55.480 --> 00:18:58.460 consistency wasn't there, but we were just trying 00:18:58.460 --> 00:19:01.720 to survive. And yeah, I'm like super exhausted, 00:19:01.859 --> 00:19:04.039 pregnant. Yeah. There were nights where we would 00:19:04.039 --> 00:19:06.640 literally sleep in the recliner pretty much all 00:19:06.640 --> 00:19:10.839 night long. Like my sciatica would be just feeling 00:19:10.839 --> 00:19:14.920 really great after that. But once Cruz was born, 00:19:15.480 --> 00:19:18.140 Colt's sleep got absolutely terrible after that. 00:19:18.259 --> 00:19:21.220 And I think that's a common thing when like another, 00:19:21.359 --> 00:19:26.480 like they regress or can regress. And now with 00:19:26.480 --> 00:19:31.900 a newborn baby and a two -year -old, or he wasn't 00:19:31.900 --> 00:19:35.380 two yet, a 19 -month -old where both of them 00:19:35.380 --> 00:19:38.339 are waking up multiple times a night, it just. 00:19:38.829 --> 00:19:41.849 Like zero hours of sleep for me. Yes. And so 00:19:41.849 --> 00:19:43.710 it became like a divide and conquer situation 00:19:43.710 --> 00:19:46.210 for Michael and I. And honestly, it's still a 00:19:46.210 --> 00:19:48.269 divide and conquer situation for us right now. 00:19:48.710 --> 00:19:53.069 And Cruz is nine months old now. And he's in 00:19:53.069 --> 00:19:55.609 a terrible sleep progression right now that I 00:19:55.609 --> 00:19:58.509 cannot figure out. We do co -sleep with him. 00:19:58.569 --> 00:20:01.430 I pretty much co -sleep with him full time. And 00:20:01.430 --> 00:20:04.390 that has helped us a ton in the beginning. I 00:20:04.390 --> 00:20:06.769 think it's starting to hurt us. I think both 00:20:06.769 --> 00:20:08.940 of us are waking each other up. Yeah, I know 00:20:08.940 --> 00:20:11.420 with both of our kids that like came a point 00:20:11.420 --> 00:20:16.160 with co -sleeping where it was just like me being 00:20:16.160 --> 00:20:19.299 there made it harder for them to just like sleep 00:20:19.299 --> 00:20:23.140 for a longer period. And so I'm at like the point 00:20:23.140 --> 00:20:26.980 where I think that we need to do something. We 00:20:26.980 --> 00:20:31.380 need to change something with his sleep. I don't 00:20:31.380 --> 00:20:33.660 know entirely if I want to sleep train again. 00:20:34.650 --> 00:20:36.990 Because I mean, I am still nursing to sleep, 00:20:36.990 --> 00:20:41.990 but something has to change because I'm so at 00:20:41.990 --> 00:20:46.990 my wits end of I need sleep so terribly. Like 00:20:46.990 --> 00:20:49.769 right now, Cruz is waking up every one or two 00:20:49.769 --> 00:20:53.019 hours in the night. And he just, like, some nights 00:20:53.019 --> 00:20:55.000 he just wants to eat a little bit and then he 00:20:55.000 --> 00:20:56.660 goes right back to sleep. And he legit will, 00:20:56.700 --> 00:20:58.920 like, he'll eat and then he, like, pulls away 00:20:58.920 --> 00:21:01.660 from me and wants to, like, then he rolls over 00:21:01.660 --> 00:21:04.200 and wants to. It's like, thank you, mom. Yeah, 00:21:04.259 --> 00:21:08.019 I don't need you anymore. And, but then. There's 00:21:08.019 --> 00:21:10.720 been multiple nights in the past month where 00:21:10.720 --> 00:21:14.839 he's up from 2 to 5 and just like chatting, sitting 00:21:14.839 --> 00:21:16.839 there, practicing his waving, practicing his 00:21:16.839 --> 00:21:19.299 clapping, literally just rolling everywhere around. 00:21:19.420 --> 00:21:21.880 And because I'm in the bed with him, I'm like, 00:21:21.940 --> 00:21:25.500 I have to stay awake because he could crawl out 00:21:25.500 --> 00:21:28.480 of the bed right now if he wants. Yeah, I think 00:21:28.480 --> 00:21:32.500 I'm just at my wit's end. harder part of it too 00:21:32.500 --> 00:21:35.359 is colt is still waking up every single night 00:21:35.359 --> 00:21:38.839 right now and anywhere from like midnight to 00:21:38.839 --> 00:21:42.319 3 a .m is kind of when he wakes up and we are 00:21:42.319 --> 00:21:45.180 just so exhausted that we ended up moving colt 00:21:45.180 --> 00:21:48.059 to a floor bed and now michael just will go in 00:21:48.059 --> 00:21:50.059 there and just sleep the rest of the night in 00:21:50.059 --> 00:21:52.880 there with colt you have to sleep like that's 00:21:52.880 --> 00:21:56.059 part of the hard thing is yeah you're like i'm 00:21:56.059 --> 00:21:59.180 exhausted i have to function during the day yeah 00:21:59.180 --> 00:22:01.930 and i don't know if like Maybe a stay at home 00:22:01.930 --> 00:22:05.930 mom can correct me on this, but I feel like, 00:22:05.930 --> 00:22:09.009 so again, we just celebrated Christmas and had 00:22:09.009 --> 00:22:12.490 two weeks off and the like really rough nights 00:22:12.490 --> 00:22:16.150 we had in that time that I was off were super 00:22:16.150 --> 00:22:19.650 frustrating. They were less stressful though, 00:22:19.750 --> 00:22:23.029 because I was like, oh, during the day I can 00:22:23.029 --> 00:22:24.950 like baby make up for this at some point. I can 00:22:24.950 --> 00:22:27.130 get a nap in, whether that's while the kids are 00:22:27.130 --> 00:22:29.269 napping or like Stuart and I can tag team where. 00:22:29.720 --> 00:22:31.759 I take a nap and he takes care of the kids and 00:22:31.759 --> 00:22:35.240 then vice versa, whatever. But then going back 00:22:35.240 --> 00:22:39.519 to work, it's like, well, I don't have time for 00:22:39.519 --> 00:22:45.140 a nap. So it's not that like the sleep regression 00:22:45.140 --> 00:22:48.519 and not sleeping isn't frustrating when you don't 00:22:48.519 --> 00:22:51.319 work. But I think there's less, at least for 00:22:51.319 --> 00:22:53.660 me, there's less stress with it. Yes. Because 00:22:53.660 --> 00:22:55.720 I don't have to like. Not that you don't have 00:22:55.720 --> 00:22:58.220 to function, but like there's maybe a little 00:22:58.220 --> 00:23:01.539 more room for like, oh, today we're just going 00:23:01.539 --> 00:23:04.460 to watch a movie. Or like, no, actually we're 00:23:04.460 --> 00:23:06.019 the kind of tired where we need to get out of 00:23:06.019 --> 00:23:09.599 the house and go play to like get our blood pumping, 00:23:09.680 --> 00:23:12.380 whatever. And with working, I'm like, I don't 00:23:12.380 --> 00:23:16.819 have those options. Yeah. I completely agree 00:23:16.819 --> 00:23:18.660 with you a hundred percent on that. And like, 00:23:18.680 --> 00:23:20.720 we're just, I feel like we're just in survival 00:23:20.720 --> 00:23:24.349 mode. But we've been in survival mode for the 00:23:24.349 --> 00:23:26.710 past year, it feels like. And I'm like, where 00:23:26.710 --> 00:23:30.730 do we draw the line here? Where do we... And 00:23:30.730 --> 00:23:33.890 what do we do? What do we do? And I know a lot 00:23:33.890 --> 00:23:35.569 of people... And I don't even know if I'm looking 00:23:35.569 --> 00:23:37.750 for advice or anything like that. It's just kind 00:23:37.750 --> 00:23:40.730 of the season that we're in. That's the other 00:23:40.730 --> 00:23:43.009 annoying thing is when people give you unsolicited 00:23:43.009 --> 00:23:45.170 advice. Yeah. People could tell me like, oh, 00:23:45.190 --> 00:23:47.230 I got to re -sleep train my two -year -old. I 00:23:47.230 --> 00:23:50.640 got to sleep train my... nine month old and yeah 00:23:50.640 --> 00:23:53.920 i get it i see the benefits in that but i'm also 00:23:53.920 --> 00:23:58.299 i'm seeing the negatives of it too of like do 00:23:58.299 --> 00:24:01.480 i want to do that again i don't know yeah and 00:24:01.480 --> 00:24:04.079 i'm like this decision is something where i'm 00:24:04.079 --> 00:24:07.480 kind of like i'm at like a crossroads of and 00:24:07.480 --> 00:24:11.019 there's so much information that yeah makes it 00:24:11.019 --> 00:24:13.140 so much harder because you're like okay here 00:24:13.140 --> 00:24:16.150 are the benefits i also like Here are the scientific 00:24:16.150 --> 00:24:18.390 benefits and here are the scientific negatives. 00:24:18.549 --> 00:24:22.809 Yes. And which one do I want to deal with? Yeah. 00:24:22.950 --> 00:24:26.309 Yeah. It's like right now we're not sleep training 00:24:26.309 --> 00:24:28.289 or anything, but there are definitely times I 00:24:28.289 --> 00:24:33.430 let Zeta cry. And like the two main times, one 00:24:33.430 --> 00:24:35.670 is like there are times when I set her down and 00:24:35.670 --> 00:24:37.869 she's clearly like just mad that I set her down 00:24:37.869 --> 00:24:40.349 and she'll cry for like less than five minutes 00:24:40.349 --> 00:24:43.589 and then go to sleep. I'm like, okay, that happens. 00:24:44.220 --> 00:24:45.940 And so I've kind of just like tried to come to 00:24:45.940 --> 00:24:47.660 terms with that. I was like, sometimes she's 00:24:47.660 --> 00:24:49.019 just going to cry for a minute cause she's mad 00:24:49.019 --> 00:24:51.000 that. And you can tell the difference as a mom. 00:24:51.119 --> 00:24:55.000 Yeah. Typically. Yes. Sometimes it's like there's, 00:24:55.000 --> 00:24:57.380 you know, she throws us for a loop. And then 00:24:57.380 --> 00:24:59.460 of course the other time it's like, I'm getting 00:24:59.460 --> 00:25:02.119 really frustrated. So I need to walk away and 00:25:02.119 --> 00:25:05.680 like take a breather. And it's funny cause in 00:25:05.680 --> 00:25:07.960 moments like right now when I'm just like logically 00:25:07.960 --> 00:25:11.599 talking about it, I'm like, I know that's. the 00:25:11.599 --> 00:25:14.559 right thing to do yeah that like her crying sometimes 00:25:14.559 --> 00:25:17.920 isn't gonna form like this like deep trauma you 00:25:17.920 --> 00:25:20.839 know me walking away when i'm frustrated is better 00:25:20.839 --> 00:25:23.220 for her than me not walking away when i'm frustrated 00:25:23.220 --> 00:25:26.980 letting her cry for two minutes while she's just 00:25:26.980 --> 00:25:29.339 like oh yeah i'm in my crib i'm fine yeah is 00:25:29.339 --> 00:25:32.990 it gonna cause like this lifelong trauma but 00:25:32.990 --> 00:25:36.109 then you'll see like this info post on instagram 00:25:36.109 --> 00:25:40.549 about how like attachment and blah blah blah 00:25:40.549 --> 00:25:44.349 and all of a sudden you're like oh so i am the 00:25:44.349 --> 00:25:47.750 worst mom in the entire world and she's never 00:25:47.750 --> 00:25:51.329 gonna love me and like there goes the spiral 00:25:51.329 --> 00:25:54.450 there goes the spiral yeah Yeah, and, like, you 00:25:54.450 --> 00:25:57.130 have those moments where you're like, oh, so, 00:25:57.210 --> 00:25:59.369 like, I'm doing all the wrong things. Because 00:25:59.369 --> 00:26:01.150 even when I'm doing the thing, then again, like, 00:26:01.230 --> 00:26:03.430 I know walking away when I'm frustrated is the 00:26:03.430 --> 00:26:06.210 right thing. I'm being told that it's the wrong 00:26:06.210 --> 00:26:08.589 thing because I should never let my child cry 00:26:08.589 --> 00:26:11.289 without my comfort. Which, like, obviously, like, 00:26:11.369 --> 00:26:13.569 I go back and comfort her where it's like, tag 00:26:13.569 --> 00:26:15.890 out, Stuart, you're in. You know, we don't just, 00:26:15.970 --> 00:26:19.710 like, let our kid cry for hours on end. And, 00:26:19.869 --> 00:26:21.630 like, I also have to remind myself that, right, 00:26:21.630 --> 00:26:23.769 where it's like. walking away for a few minutes 00:26:23.769 --> 00:26:26.690 it's not it's not the same as just like letting 00:26:26.690 --> 00:26:30.150 them cry yeah cry cry but yeah you just like 00:26:30.150 --> 00:26:32.150 get in your head because again there's all this 00:26:32.150 --> 00:26:35.150 information yeah they're like cool you're like 00:26:35.150 --> 00:26:37.869 what do i take it like what do i gotta pick and 00:26:37.869 --> 00:26:40.549 choose what information right like for me it's 00:26:40.549 --> 00:26:43.650 like with cole being such a terrible sleeper 00:26:43.650 --> 00:26:46.349 right now i'm also reading all these things about 00:26:46.349 --> 00:26:49.480 like oh he's He's got separation anxiety like 00:26:49.480 --> 00:26:51.519 that is hitting him at this point. He's also 00:26:51.519 --> 00:26:54.200 starting to dream. So is he having bad dreams? 00:26:54.319 --> 00:26:56.759 Is he having nightmares? Yeah. And they're also 00:26:56.759 --> 00:26:59.079 at a stage where like they're not quite like 00:26:59.079 --> 00:27:02.200 they kind of communicate. Yeah. But like Lloyd, 00:27:02.259 --> 00:27:04.940 when he wakes up, I usually like I'll try to 00:27:04.940 --> 00:27:07.339 ask him. Yeah. Like what? What happened? And 00:27:07.339 --> 00:27:11.220 he never answers. Yeah. Colt now, I think I've 00:27:11.220 --> 00:27:14.019 conditioned him to say he's had a bad dream because 00:27:14.019 --> 00:27:16.140 I'll be like, oh, did you have a bad dream? And 00:27:16.140 --> 00:27:17.940 he goes, yeah. And then I'll ask him what it 00:27:17.940 --> 00:27:20.900 was about and he can't tell me. And then I'm 00:27:20.900 --> 00:27:23.099 reading like, oh, he could be afraid of the dark. 00:27:23.220 --> 00:27:26.160 So do I need to put a nightlight on? Like all 00:27:26.160 --> 00:27:28.680 these factors are starting to come into play 00:27:28.680 --> 00:27:32.980 where I'm like, I don't. necessarily want to 00:27:32.980 --> 00:27:36.819 re sleep train him right knowing that these factors 00:27:36.819 --> 00:27:39.359 could be a piece that is holding him back from 00:27:39.359 --> 00:27:41.559 just getting good sleep and that we're just in 00:27:41.559 --> 00:27:44.319 this window of time where it's like we just have 00:27:44.319 --> 00:27:46.460 to get over it and then he's gonna sleep good 00:27:46.460 --> 00:27:49.299 again right but then i'm also like am i creating 00:27:49.299 --> 00:27:51.759 all these bad habits where now it's gonna make 00:27:51.759 --> 00:27:54.660 it worse he's relying upon michael or i to comfort 00:27:54.660 --> 00:27:58.900 him and it's just here comes the spiral of like 00:27:59.200 --> 00:28:02.420 Am I just making my child a bad sleeper? Right. 00:28:02.660 --> 00:28:07.299 Maybe. And I just don't know how to get past 00:28:07.299 --> 00:28:11.000 it without there being some pain along the way 00:28:11.000 --> 00:28:14.680 from both parties. Yeah. And then again, you're 00:28:14.680 --> 00:28:17.359 like, I just need some sleep. Yeah. Like, because 00:28:17.359 --> 00:28:20.450 you can't. Also can't like make these good decisions 00:28:20.450 --> 00:28:22.950 when you're running on no sleep. And like when 00:28:22.950 --> 00:28:24.950 you're in the middle of the night, you will do 00:28:24.950 --> 00:28:27.170 anything just to get back to sleep. And so like 00:28:27.170 --> 00:28:30.089 the easy choice is for Michael just to go in 00:28:30.089 --> 00:28:33.049 with him and just to have him go right. Because 00:28:33.049 --> 00:28:36.609 usually when Michael goes back in, Colt just 00:28:36.609 --> 00:28:39.190 cuddles up and they go right back to sleep. And 00:28:39.190 --> 00:28:41.609 there's the occasional night where it's like 00:28:41.609 --> 00:28:44.109 I think he's having a night terror where we cannot 00:28:44.109 --> 00:28:48.490 get him out of this state of like. just a tizzy 00:28:48.490 --> 00:28:52.890 but then yeah it's the the sucky side of like 00:28:52.890 --> 00:28:56.450 then I'm on my own with Cruz and if Cruz is sleeping 00:28:56.450 --> 00:28:58.849 so terribly I don't have anyone to tap out with 00:28:58.849 --> 00:29:03.970 like right it's just we're in this terrible like 00:29:03.970 --> 00:29:09.329 just funnel of just exhaustion and I don't I 00:29:09.329 --> 00:29:13.069 feel so trapped in it and I don't know where 00:29:14.220 --> 00:29:18.400 I don't know where to go because we're just exhausted. 00:29:18.500 --> 00:29:21.000 And I'm like, you know, everything is a season. 00:29:21.259 --> 00:29:23.259 Like we're not, it's not going to be like this 00:29:23.259 --> 00:29:25.480 forever. I'm not going to have a 12 year old 00:29:25.480 --> 00:29:29.220 that hopefully is waking up every hour of the 00:29:29.220 --> 00:29:32.539 night. You know, like there's going to be something 00:29:32.539 --> 00:29:36.099 that's going to shift at some point, but I just 00:29:36.099 --> 00:29:38.180 don't know if it's a shift that I need to make 00:29:38.180 --> 00:29:42.569 right now. white knuckle it and know that we're 00:29:42.569 --> 00:29:44.089 going to get through this? Or is there something 00:29:44.089 --> 00:29:46.230 that I need to change? Exactly. And that like, 00:29:46.329 --> 00:29:48.430 and I think there's little pieces. Like I think 00:29:48.430 --> 00:29:51.490 that a lot of the nights where like, we're going 00:29:51.490 --> 00:29:54.089 to bed a little bit too late. Like both kids 00:29:54.089 --> 00:29:57.509 are overtired. Like if, if we're not in bed by 00:29:57.509 --> 00:30:01.210 seven 30, usually we've kind of crossed that 00:30:01.210 --> 00:30:04.529 threshold of like, shoot, we missed our window 00:30:04.529 --> 00:30:07.990 of like. not hitting the overtired and everyone's 00:30:07.990 --> 00:30:10.230 pissed off yeah and then as a mom it's tough 00:30:10.230 --> 00:30:13.210 because you're like I want an hour to myself 00:30:13.210 --> 00:30:16.130 yeah Or like an hour for like me and my husband 00:30:16.130 --> 00:30:18.630 to like remember that we like each other. Yeah. 00:30:18.970 --> 00:30:22.069 Because also that will, sleep regression is not 00:30:22.069 --> 00:30:24.329 good for. Not good for a relationship. You being 00:30:24.329 --> 00:30:26.470 nice to each other. I've definitely said multiple 00:30:26.470 --> 00:30:28.250 things on multiple occasions where I'm like, 00:30:28.349 --> 00:30:32.369 let's scratch that from the record. Yeah. I know. 00:30:32.410 --> 00:30:35.390 Like, please don't. Yeah. Don't remember that. 00:30:35.470 --> 00:30:37.349 Anything I say in the middle of the night can 00:30:37.349 --> 00:30:39.769 be just thrown out the window. Yeah. That was 00:30:39.769 --> 00:30:42.519 someone else. Yeah. That's my alter ego. Yeah, 00:30:42.539 --> 00:30:44.660 but then, you know, you get the kids to sleep 00:30:44.660 --> 00:30:49.200 finally. Yes. And you're like, okay, do I also 00:30:49.200 --> 00:30:51.720 go to sleep right now? Yeah. Or do I take a minute 00:30:51.720 --> 00:30:54.859 to unwind? Yeah. Which, like, for me, especially 00:30:54.859 --> 00:30:57.640 if it's been a bad day, I'm like, I need that 00:30:57.640 --> 00:31:01.319 unwind time. Same. Just to be like, okay, I didn't 00:31:01.319 --> 00:31:04.119 end on a bad note. We, you know, watched an episode 00:31:04.119 --> 00:31:06.680 of The Office or, you know, something dumb or 00:31:06.680 --> 00:31:10.920 whatever. Yep. To kind of, like. almost recalibrate 00:31:10.920 --> 00:31:13.059 which is probably like a different coping mechanism 00:31:13.059 --> 00:31:15.140 that you know i should be in therapy for but 00:31:15.140 --> 00:31:17.700 we don't need to that's that's okay this is our 00:31:17.700 --> 00:31:20.259 therapy right here different subject yeah but 00:31:20.259 --> 00:31:22.460 then that means you're going to bed later yep 00:31:22.460 --> 00:31:26.339 which means any and all wakings yeah are worse 00:31:26.339 --> 00:31:29.859 and it's just like it's so terrible yeah and 00:31:29.859 --> 00:31:32.519 that's the other thing too is like two things 00:31:32.519 --> 00:31:35.460 um right when we get the kids to bed we try to 00:31:35.799 --> 00:31:38.680 clean and reset the house, which like helps me 00:31:38.680 --> 00:31:40.819 to feel better if I'm then waking up in the morning 00:31:40.819 --> 00:31:44.119 to a clean house or clean -ish. Then the other 00:31:44.119 --> 00:31:47.339 piece of it is, is Cruz is every single night, 00:31:47.359 --> 00:31:51.319 he probably 95 % of nights has a false start. 00:31:51.619 --> 00:31:56.079 Where 30 minutes on the dot, 30 minutes he wakes 00:31:56.079 --> 00:31:59.200 up and then I have to re... get him to sleep 00:31:59.200 --> 00:32:01.940 yeah and so i feel like that first 30 minutes 00:32:01.940 --> 00:32:04.720 that i have is to clean and get the house back 00:32:04.720 --> 00:32:08.359 in order yep then i re -put him to bed and then 00:32:08.359 --> 00:32:11.140 then i try to have a little bit of downtime but 00:32:11.140 --> 00:32:15.319 at this point it's like 9 30 right and i'm like 00:32:15.319 --> 00:32:18.420 well you're like i have to work tomorrow yeah 00:32:18.420 --> 00:32:23.039 like i would like to watch a show or spend time 00:32:23.039 --> 00:32:26.519 with michael and Then it's like, okay, we're 00:32:26.519 --> 00:32:29.119 up till 1030, 11 o 'clock at night. And then 00:32:29.119 --> 00:32:32.279 by the time I go to bed, Cruz is up again. And 00:32:32.279 --> 00:32:34.799 then it's like, okay, midnight by the time I 00:32:34.799 --> 00:32:38.059 actually am closing my eyes. Yeah. It's just 00:32:38.059 --> 00:32:40.339 a vicious cycle that we're in right now. And 00:32:40.339 --> 00:32:43.500 I don't know where the breaking point is going 00:32:43.500 --> 00:32:45.299 to be. Like, I feel like I've reached my breaking 00:32:45.299 --> 00:32:49.960 point, but. Yeah. I don't know. So for us with 00:32:49.960 --> 00:32:53.180 Zeta, like I said, we were recommended to wake 00:32:53.180 --> 00:32:54.500 her up at night to feed her. So that's what I 00:32:54.500 --> 00:32:56.460 was doing. Then at her nine month appointment, 00:32:56.680 --> 00:32:59.599 the doctor's like, she's gaining great weight. 00:32:59.920 --> 00:33:01.519 I think you can just let her sleep through the 00:33:01.519 --> 00:33:06.299 night. And finally I was like, hallelujah. I 00:33:06.299 --> 00:33:09.069 can get some sleep. And that's when the regression 00:33:09.069 --> 00:33:11.170 started. So I'm like, I don't know what this 00:33:11.170 --> 00:33:14.589 is. I hate this. But then it's like, okay, it's 00:33:14.589 --> 00:33:18.250 a regression. It's going to go away. And so there 00:33:18.250 --> 00:33:21.089 was one night that I know I've told you about 00:33:21.089 --> 00:33:27.019 that we were up from 2 to 4 a .m. I know we both 00:33:27.019 --> 00:33:29.660 had to work the next day. Zeta woke up Lloyd 00:33:29.660 --> 00:33:32.059 to like turn to this thing where it's like, we're 00:33:32.059 --> 00:33:34.099 like switching kids. Like you take care of her, 00:33:34.160 --> 00:33:36.380 I'll take care of him. Let's switch back. Like 00:33:36.380 --> 00:33:38.900 we'll put one down and nope, he's crying because 00:33:38.900 --> 00:33:43.099 we left the room. Yeah, so we had like a couple 00:33:43.099 --> 00:33:45.740 nights that were like very much like that. And 00:33:45.740 --> 00:33:49.799 then Stuart had taken almost a whole month of 00:33:49.799 --> 00:33:51.539 December off because he still had some of his 00:33:51.539 --> 00:33:55.359 parental leave. Leading up to that, I was like, 00:33:55.420 --> 00:33:58.160 if something doesn't change soon, like, I'm going 00:33:58.160 --> 00:34:00.279 to have a mental breakdown. Yeah. Like, I'm so 00:34:00.279 --> 00:34:03.140 tired. This is so frustrating. I don't know what 00:34:03.140 --> 00:34:06.940 to do. Yeah. This is overwhelming. And then he 00:34:06.940 --> 00:34:10.360 was like, well, okay. With him taking some time 00:34:10.360 --> 00:34:12.559 off, that did help. Yeah. And I don't know if 00:34:12.559 --> 00:34:15.079 it was just, like, again, there's less stress 00:34:15.079 --> 00:34:18.099 because now. Yeah, more support during the day 00:34:18.099 --> 00:34:21.300 or what. And for us, the sleep regression hit 00:34:21.300 --> 00:34:24.480 every single thing. Like. multiple wakings at 00:34:24.480 --> 00:34:27.199 night not going back to sleep during those multiple 00:34:27.199 --> 00:34:31.719 wakings waking up early not napping having a 00:34:31.719 --> 00:34:34.179 hard time going back down to sleep or like going 00:34:34.179 --> 00:34:37.659 down to sleep for bedtime so like literally every 00:34:37.659 --> 00:34:41.280 single things yeah and slowly like throughout 00:34:41.280 --> 00:34:43.360 december they had like started to get a little 00:34:43.360 --> 00:34:45.340 bit better yeah where it's like okay she would 00:34:45.340 --> 00:34:47.519 wake up at night but like i could get her back 00:34:47.519 --> 00:34:51.400 down cool cool cool you know naps are still like 00:34:51.400 --> 00:34:52.940 hit or miss but we're like getting some good 00:34:52.940 --> 00:34:56.400 naps blah blah blah and yes we finally started 00:34:56.400 --> 00:35:00.099 to get better and then we had christmas just 00:35:00.099 --> 00:35:02.719 throws everything and it threw everything off 00:35:02.719 --> 00:35:06.019 yeah it was just awful it was like terrible we're 00:35:06.019 --> 00:35:07.719 never celebrating christmas again because that 00:35:07.719 --> 00:35:12.440 was so bad um stick to the routine yeah and it 00:35:12.440 --> 00:35:16.050 just like it threw everything off yeah And it's 00:35:16.050 --> 00:35:17.989 just so rough. And that just like makes it even 00:35:17.989 --> 00:35:19.530 more frustrating. So you're like, oh, we were 00:35:19.530 --> 00:35:22.570 like kind of getting better. And again, is this 00:35:22.570 --> 00:35:25.489 what disrupted it? Yeah. Probably to an extent. 00:35:25.789 --> 00:35:28.030 Would this have happened either way? I don't 00:35:28.030 --> 00:35:30.829 know. Yeah. I think it's, yeah, it's almost worse. 00:35:30.909 --> 00:35:33.190 Like you said, like when it feels like you're 00:35:33.190 --> 00:35:35.449 getting better and then it gets worse again. 00:35:35.510 --> 00:35:37.929 Like for me, I'm like, I think it's been worse. 00:35:38.030 --> 00:35:40.929 Like we've just been bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. 00:35:41.710 --> 00:35:45.619 Whereas like if it's. okay really good than bad 00:35:45.619 --> 00:35:48.420 it's like oh my god the bad feels so much worse 00:35:48.420 --> 00:35:50.820 than it you're like i had that inkling of a hope 00:35:50.820 --> 00:35:53.599 yeah that maybe maybe something would happen 00:35:53.599 --> 00:35:58.659 yeah yep yeah it's it was rough and then oh yeah 00:35:58.659 --> 00:36:01.480 the week of christmas i didn't mention this on 00:36:01.480 --> 00:36:04.480 our christmas episode but i think it was actually 00:36:04.480 --> 00:36:08.659 christmas eve night for some reason almost everyone 00:36:08.659 --> 00:36:11.260 slept well except for me like we did go to bed 00:36:11.260 --> 00:36:13.539 a little late which is to be expected i think 00:36:13.539 --> 00:36:16.059 we like by the time stewart and i were finally 00:36:16.059 --> 00:36:19.099 in bed it was about midnight and i didn't even 00:36:19.099 --> 00:36:22.239 fall asleep till after two oh my just like on 00:36:22.239 --> 00:36:24.659 my own yeah and that pisses you off even more 00:36:24.659 --> 00:36:26.559 i'm like okay neither of the kids are waking 00:36:26.559 --> 00:36:29.000 up they will i think they will sleep for like 00:36:29.000 --> 00:36:30.480 eight hours or something like that which is like 00:36:30.480 --> 00:36:32.340 that's great except for the night they sleep 00:36:32.340 --> 00:36:35.940 eight hours i don't sleep that sucks yes that 00:36:35.940 --> 00:36:39.239 was Oh, gosh. Just everything makes you so mad 00:36:39.239 --> 00:36:44.059 when you're tired. Okay, I have like a fact to 00:36:44.059 --> 00:36:46.659 share. This is the extent of the statistics that 00:36:46.659 --> 00:36:49.880 you guys get for this episode. So poor sleep 00:36:49.880 --> 00:36:54.460 impacts cognitive function. This is short -term 00:36:54.460 --> 00:36:57.719 versus long -term. So how it impacts cognitive 00:36:57.719 --> 00:37:01.960 function over a short term is difficulty concentrating. 00:37:02.860 --> 00:37:07.559 Feel that. Decline in mood. Feel that. Impaired 00:37:07.559 --> 00:37:11.340 memory. Yes. Visible signs of fatigue. Absolutely. 00:37:12.619 --> 00:37:15.239 Versus long -term, which I don't know what like 00:37:15.239 --> 00:37:18.219 long -term is, like if one year is long -term 00:37:18.219 --> 00:37:20.360 or if like multiple years is long -term in this 00:37:20.360 --> 00:37:23.940 case. But so over a long -term poor work performance, 00:37:24.039 --> 00:37:26.500 which I feel like I can relate to that in some 00:37:26.500 --> 00:37:29.960 sense of like the concentration, I guess. Yeah. 00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:35.360 Cognitive decline. Okay. Maybe. I don't know. 00:37:35.420 --> 00:37:37.980 This one though. Heightened risk of dementia. 00:37:38.480 --> 00:37:40.840 Oh. Hate that. Love to hear that. Yeah. Yeah. 00:37:40.940 --> 00:37:44.039 So do all moms just like have a heightened risk 00:37:44.039 --> 00:37:46.679 of dementia? Probably. Probably. Yeah. Unless 00:37:46.679 --> 00:37:50.679 your kid is a really good sleeper. But I just 00:37:50.679 --> 00:37:52.800 thought that was interesting. Yeah. At least 00:37:52.800 --> 00:37:54.980 the short term. Like I'm like. Very relatable. 00:37:55.019 --> 00:37:58.179 Oh, absolutely. And I feel like so many things 00:37:58.179 --> 00:38:01.090 go along with that. Like appetite. self -care 00:38:01.090 --> 00:38:05.329 like all these things mental health yeah even 00:38:05.329 --> 00:38:08.210 like basic stuff then too right where it's like 00:38:08.210 --> 00:38:10.570 okay i usually shower after the kids go to bed 00:38:10.570 --> 00:38:14.630 but then it's like do i take like a long nice 00:38:14.630 --> 00:38:17.489 like relaxing shower or do i just like not in 00:38:17.489 --> 00:38:21.130 and out yeah like you know not stink and then 00:38:21.130 --> 00:38:24.929 go to bed exactly no for me it's like if cruise 00:38:25.559 --> 00:38:29.079 is in our room sleeping, like depending on if 00:38:29.079 --> 00:38:32.219 I can get him in the crib or not, then I'm like 00:38:32.219 --> 00:38:35.260 kind of locked out of doing a shower just because 00:38:35.260 --> 00:38:38.940 like the shower is just slightly too loud. Of 00:38:38.940 --> 00:38:41.440 course. Where it wakes him up and he's like in 00:38:41.440 --> 00:38:44.159 that regression where it seems like he's just 00:38:44.159 --> 00:38:47.199 like not in a deep, deep sleep. He's like in 00:38:47.199 --> 00:38:50.320 a super just. light sleep where every little 00:38:50.320 --> 00:38:53.079 noise is waking him up right now yep and so if 00:38:53.079 --> 00:38:54.980 he's if I can't get him to sleep in the crib 00:38:54.980 --> 00:38:57.980 and he's in our bed then I'm just like I'm out 00:38:57.980 --> 00:39:00.960 of a shower and that kind of sucks really cool 00:39:00.960 --> 00:39:05.420 yeah so stinky stinky over here yeah it happens 00:39:05.420 --> 00:39:10.559 yeah sleep is such a terrible thing in our house 00:39:10.559 --> 00:39:15.820 like a sore subject and it's tough to like I 00:39:15.820 --> 00:39:18.380 honestly think it's easier with the babies because 00:39:18.380 --> 00:39:21.579 they're not as grumpy when they don't get sleep. 00:39:21.679 --> 00:39:23.960 Like obviously it's super important, but like 00:39:23.960 --> 00:39:27.599 you see it with the toddler. Yeah. Oh yeah. And 00:39:27.599 --> 00:39:29.679 yeah, when they're not getting enough sleep, 00:39:29.739 --> 00:39:34.099 like all of those things you listed. Just impacts 00:39:34.099 --> 00:39:39.000 a toddler who has no logic and no reason and 00:39:39.000 --> 00:39:41.199 has not figured out how to handle their emotions 00:39:41.199 --> 00:39:45.159 yet. And it just it makes it so rough because 00:39:45.159 --> 00:39:48.599 you're not just dealing with like you being overtired. 00:39:48.659 --> 00:39:50.619 You're dealing with them being overtired. Yeah. 00:39:50.980 --> 00:39:54.440 And yeah. Yeah. No, I feel that 100 percent with 00:39:54.440 --> 00:39:58.500 Colt right now. Like the first verbalization 00:39:58.500 --> 00:40:01.610 him and I have in the morning, I can tell. How 00:40:01.610 --> 00:40:02.949 the day is going to go. Yeah, how the day is 00:40:02.949 --> 00:40:06.329 going to go. If he is, hi, mama. And I go, did 00:40:06.329 --> 00:40:10.650 you sleep good? Yes. Or is it, you know, a different 00:40:10.650 --> 00:40:15.369 attitude? Yeah. Then I can know if he got a good 00:40:15.369 --> 00:40:17.269 night's sleep or he didn't and how the day is 00:40:17.269 --> 00:40:20.510 going to go. Yep. Yeah. So I don't know what 00:40:20.510 --> 00:40:23.170 we want to get out of this episode other than 00:40:23.170 --> 00:40:25.869 just like. hopefully encouragement yeah we we 00:40:25.869 --> 00:40:28.590 both need to vent about this but also encouragement 00:40:28.590 --> 00:40:32.070 to you guys that are listening of like sleep 00:40:32.070 --> 00:40:35.809 is not not a good thing for us right now so if 00:40:35.809 --> 00:40:38.210 you're in that too like you're not alone not 00:40:38.210 --> 00:40:41.769 at all no and it like hopefully all of us will 00:40:41.769 --> 00:40:44.449 sleep again one day soon but yeah and i think 00:40:44.449 --> 00:40:47.110 like it's tough because a lot of times when you 00:40:47.110 --> 00:40:50.429 try to vent and like try to relate if someone 00:40:50.429 --> 00:40:53.969 isn't experiencing it no matter how kind they 00:40:53.969 --> 00:40:56.969 try to be, my mom listens, so I'm sorry, Mom. 00:40:58.730 --> 00:41:02.650 But, like, I mean, my parents don't have little 00:41:02.650 --> 00:41:05.090 kids in the house. So when I tell them, they're 00:41:05.090 --> 00:41:07.409 like, oh, I'm so sorry. Like, that sucks, which 00:41:07.409 --> 00:41:10.130 is nice to hear. But I'm like, but you also got, 00:41:10.170 --> 00:41:11.789 like, a full eight hours of sleep last night. 00:41:11.849 --> 00:41:14.369 You can take a nap today if you want to. Like, 00:41:14.449 --> 00:41:19.289 how you relate is different. You know, and even 00:41:19.289 --> 00:41:22.880 when other moms are, like, not experiencing the 00:41:22.880 --> 00:41:24.619 same thing they're like oh that sucks you're 00:41:24.619 --> 00:41:27.420 like yeah but but you you don't know yeah but 00:41:27.420 --> 00:41:29.179 your kid is sleeping I honestly even feel that 00:41:29.179 --> 00:41:31.880 way towards my husband sometimes yeah of just 00:41:31.880 --> 00:41:34.480 like if he says he's tired well he's definitely 00:41:34.480 --> 00:41:38.219 not as tired as I am because of this but and 00:41:38.219 --> 00:41:40.619 also shout out to all of the solo parents out 00:41:40.619 --> 00:41:44.199 there because I cannot even imagine going through 00:41:44.199 --> 00:41:46.400 the regressions that we're going through on my 00:41:46.400 --> 00:41:49.840 own like no not at all I cannot even imagine 00:41:49.840 --> 00:41:53.559 so Shout out to you guys for just surviving and 00:41:53.559 --> 00:41:56.199 doing what you have to do to survive. But, yeah, 00:41:56.300 --> 00:41:59.039 I feel like really just hopefully you got some 00:41:59.039 --> 00:42:03.119 encouragement from this. Just a me too. Yeah. 00:42:03.239 --> 00:42:05.699 We're in this together. Yeah. We're all not sleeping 00:42:05.699 --> 00:42:08.300 together. Oh, my gosh. Hopefully in, like, six 00:42:08.300 --> 00:42:10.280 months from now we can have an episode of, like, 00:42:10.360 --> 00:42:14.559 we're sleeping. We survived. We survived. Yeah. 00:42:14.679 --> 00:42:16.820 And then we'll probably just both have it. more 00:42:16.820 --> 00:42:19.619 babies and then yeah and then go back to not 00:42:19.619 --> 00:42:24.760 sleeping yep well do we want to hop into our 00:42:24.760 --> 00:42:27.659 wins of the week sure probably not talking about 00:42:27.659 --> 00:42:30.159 sleep but no i don't have anything sleep related 00:42:30.159 --> 00:42:33.860 yeah same okay do you want to go first sure so 00:42:33.860 --> 00:42:35.800 zeta's like starting to babble and say certain 00:42:35.800 --> 00:42:38.420 words so she can like say mama and dad she has 00:42:38.420 --> 00:42:41.599 kind of a noise for lloyd but today she said 00:42:41.599 --> 00:42:45.250 yes Oh, my gosh. Like, that's what she meant 00:42:45.250 --> 00:42:47.469 for sure. Yeah. Because she was, like, being 00:42:47.469 --> 00:42:50.989 real fussy. And she was, like, trying to crawl 00:42:50.989 --> 00:42:55.429 up all up on me. And it was about time for her 00:42:55.429 --> 00:42:58.550 to nurse. So I was like, do you want milk? Yes. 00:42:59.030 --> 00:43:01.869 And then stopped fussing until I, like, had to 00:43:01.869 --> 00:43:03.650 walk away to do something before I could nurse 00:43:03.650 --> 00:43:06.190 her. But then she started fussing again. And 00:43:06.190 --> 00:43:08.869 I was like, oh. Oh, you, like, communicated to 00:43:08.869 --> 00:43:10.289 me. I was like, that might be the first time 00:43:10.289 --> 00:43:13.170 that, like. we've like actually communicated 00:43:13.170 --> 00:43:16.170 that's not just like crying and you know baby 00:43:16.170 --> 00:43:19.110 communication yes toddler communication like 00:43:19.110 --> 00:43:21.590 she said yes like that's what it sounded like 00:43:21.590 --> 00:43:24.389 and that was clearly what she meant to so that 00:43:24.389 --> 00:43:27.030 was just like i don't remember having a moment 00:43:27.030 --> 00:43:29.030 with lloyd where it was like oh you're communicating 00:43:29.030 --> 00:43:31.670 now where it's like this is a moment with santa 00:43:31.670 --> 00:43:33.719 where i'm like Oh, you know how you're starting 00:43:33.719 --> 00:43:36.579 to communicate now, which is also so helpful. 00:43:36.800 --> 00:43:38.860 Yes. Like that's one nice thing about two -year 00:43:38.860 --> 00:43:41.239 -olds is. You can pretty much figure out what 00:43:41.239 --> 00:43:42.400 they need. They tell you what they want. Yeah. 00:43:42.400 --> 00:43:46.420 Oh, yeah. That's so great. My when kind of like 00:43:46.420 --> 00:43:49.000 similar boat, but Cruz just started saying mama. 00:43:50.069 --> 00:43:52.869 And he's gotten, it's really only in the context 00:43:52.869 --> 00:43:55.210 of like Michael's holding him or someone else 00:43:55.210 --> 00:43:57.150 is holding him and he's like wants me back. Or 00:43:57.150 --> 00:44:01.110 in the middle of the night when I'm like not 00:44:01.110 --> 00:44:05.210 feeding him quick enough or whatever. And I'm 00:44:05.210 --> 00:44:09.489 like, I love it. And I love that he's using it 00:44:09.489 --> 00:44:13.030 in that context. Like that he needs me and that 00:44:13.030 --> 00:44:15.809 just. yeah originally he was just saying dad 00:44:15.809 --> 00:44:18.230 ass but now he's like pretty much stopped saying 00:44:18.230 --> 00:44:21.769 dad and it's only mama yeah i also just remembered 00:44:21.769 --> 00:44:23.849 i have another sleep regression story oh yes 00:44:23.849 --> 00:44:27.070 please do tell that this is really a marriage 00:44:27.070 --> 00:44:30.489 story but so for context we have two cats and 00:44:30.489 --> 00:44:33.150 we kind of blame the cats for everything so like 00:44:33.150 --> 00:44:35.869 the dishes don't get done obviously that's not 00:44:35.869 --> 00:44:38.079 their fault but like It's a really good way to 00:44:38.079 --> 00:44:40.420 express frustration. Where you're not putting 00:44:40.420 --> 00:44:42.920 it on your spouse. Your spouse or yourself. So 00:44:42.920 --> 00:44:45.000 we'll be like, cats, do you ever do anything 00:44:45.000 --> 00:44:48.480 around here? So we do stuff like that all the 00:44:48.480 --> 00:44:51.960 time. And probably a month ago, maybe two months 00:44:51.960 --> 00:44:53.739 ago now, we were having a rough night getting 00:44:53.739 --> 00:44:57.179 specifically Zeta down. Stuart had gone in and 00:44:57.179 --> 00:44:59.519 finally got her down for the night. And he came 00:44:59.519 --> 00:45:01.659 out and we're both just exhausted. Like, I think 00:45:01.659 --> 00:45:03.079 it took us like an hour to get her down, something 00:45:03.079 --> 00:45:05.739 like that. And I just go, cats, why don't you? 00:45:06.010 --> 00:45:08.150 ever help with bedtime and i say it like super 00:45:08.150 --> 00:45:10.829 sassy and super mean and stewart did not hear 00:45:10.829 --> 00:45:13.409 me say the word cats so he just knows he like 00:45:13.409 --> 00:45:16.210 came out of the nursery having put our sweet 00:45:16.210 --> 00:45:19.369 baby girl down and he hears me say why don't 00:45:19.369 --> 00:45:22.789 you ever help with bedtime and he like he paused 00:45:22.789 --> 00:45:25.710 for a second and he was like wait did you say 00:45:25.710 --> 00:45:30.659 cats i was like yeah he's like okay i was about 00:45:30.659 --> 00:45:32.780 to just like be so sad he's like what do you 00:45:32.780 --> 00:45:35.420 mean how do i never help he's like i was literally 00:45:35.420 --> 00:45:38.460 just just helping so that was just i actually 00:45:38.460 --> 00:45:41.019 had that written down as a mom moment oh my gosh 00:45:41.019 --> 00:45:43.719 that's so great i need to i don't know who to 00:45:43.719 --> 00:45:46.219 blame it on but i need to start yeah i've also 00:45:46.219 --> 00:45:48.679 heard couples coming up with like imaginary friends 00:45:48.679 --> 00:45:50.920 yeah you know it's like oh kevin never helps 00:45:50.920 --> 00:45:53.760 never pulls his weight i gotta we gotta do that 00:45:54.110 --> 00:45:56.690 but maybe it'll help with my passive aggressiveness 00:45:56.690 --> 00:46:00.170 it was just so funny because even if i felt that 00:46:00.170 --> 00:46:02.670 way that's like not how i would say it i'm not 00:46:02.670 --> 00:46:04.369 confrontational so that's not how i'd say it 00:46:04.369 --> 00:46:08.469 but he was just like so dismayed for just like 00:46:08.469 --> 00:46:10.949 two seconds and then he was like oh wait the 00:46:10.949 --> 00:46:14.840 cats like yeah the cats don't do anything That's 00:46:14.840 --> 00:46:16.880 so funny. I love it. That's my last sleep regression 00:46:16.880 --> 00:46:19.960 story. Yeah. Well, let us know where you guys 00:46:19.960 --> 00:46:22.000 are at with sleep. I hope that you're getting 00:46:22.000 --> 00:46:24.860 sleep. Yes. Hopefully this is an unrelatable 00:46:24.860 --> 00:46:27.400 episode for you. Yeah. But hopefully you still 00:46:27.400 --> 00:46:30.940 enjoyed it. And follow us on Instagram at nomanualpodcast. 00:46:31.420 --> 00:46:34.340 Tell your friends about us. Yeah. We'd love to 00:46:34.340 --> 00:46:37.679 hear what you guys want to hear from us in this 00:46:37.679 --> 00:46:40.400 next year. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, have 00:46:40.400 --> 00:46:43.900 a great week. See you next week. Well, that's 00:46:43.900 --> 00:46:46.460 enough oversharing for today. If you enjoyed 00:46:46.460 --> 00:46:48.579 hanging out with us, hit subscribe so you don't 00:46:48.579 --> 00:46:51.559 miss the next round of chaos. And if you're listening 00:46:51.559 --> 00:46:53.260 while hiding in the bathroom from your kids, 00:46:53.420 --> 00:46:55.960 no judgment, we see you. Thanks for joining us 00:46:55.960 --> 00:46:59.440 on No Manual MomCast, where motherhood is messy. 00:46:59.880 --> 00:47:01.820 At least we can laugh about it together.