Welcome back to No Manual on MomCast, where we're
just talking about the realities of motherhood,
the funny things, the less funny things, and
we love to share stories. So today we have on
our friend Linnae Jenian, who was a teen mom,
and yeah, she's just going to share her story.
So Linnae, tell us just a little bit about yourself.
I have an amazing 30 -year -old child, my daughter.
She is just the absolute... most amazing human
on the planet. I was 16 when I got pregnant,
17 when I had her, and was actually in the hospital
when I found out I was pregnant. Um, which kind
of made things a little bit, even more weird
being, um, 16 in the hospital, um, and trying
to figure out why my kidneys were failing. And
so the doctor was like, is there a chance that
you can be pregnant? And I was like, well, yeah,
there, there, there could be a chance. Yeah.
Yes. Um, and so they, uh, ran a pregnancy test
and it came back positive. So I was in the hospital,
found out I was pregnant. Wow. Well, we'll get
more in depth with your story as we go. First,
let's hop into our mom moment. So this is something
random, something good, something bad, something
sad. Erica, do you want to share yours first?
I feel like I have so many right now. I was having
a hard time choosing. But so Lloyd from like.
pretty young i had kind of a feeling he was going
to be more introverted just like the way he interacted
with people he takes a little bit to warm up
but then when he's around his people he's like
just such a goober and the other day it was like
kind of confirmed because we were at a neighbor's
house for our birthday party and he kept asking
to go to the bathroom like i go potty i go potty
like okay so like i would take him then stewart
would take him and then finally he goes i go
potty at home oh you you want to Like, why do
you need to go home? I go car, I go home. We
don't need to go in the car to go home. And we
like kept trying to figure it out. I go home.
Oh, you're just tired. You just don't want to
be here anymore. You just want to go home. And
then we went home and he was fine. It was just
a really funny way that like going potty was
his way of escaping, interacting with people,
which I guess as an introvert, like that's what
you do at parties, right? Yeah. Go hide in the
bathroom. Hey, he's catching on to like what
every male does. Yes. Just go to the bathroom
for a few minutes. Yeah. Not just a few, like
20, 30. I love it. Okay. So my mom moment is
also a potty situation. So it was yesterday.
We're not really starting potty training yet,
but like just getting Colt familiar with the
potty. So I'll ask him like, you want to go pee
in the potty? And yesterday morning he was like,
yes. And so I like get him to the potty, take
off his diaper. He goes pee in the potty and
he's really excited. He gets a chocolate covered
gummy bear every time he goes pee in the potty.
And then I go to put his diaper back on and he's
like, no, no. And like alligator rolling, like
just full on tantrum to get this diaper on. And
he runs away from me, pantsless, runs into my
closet, which is a normal place he likes to go
poop. And he said, poopoo, mama, poopoo. And
I was like, no, buddy, do not poop in my closet.
I'm like, I, oh, my gosh. I was, like, freaking
out. Was this during the day when Michael was
gone, too? No. Thank goodness he was there. He
was just, like, hanging out on the bed with Cruz.
And he was like, Colt, don't do it. Don't do
it. And thankfully I get Colt out. But it's,
like, full -on tantrum trying to, like, hold
him down to, like, put his diaper back on. So
I was like, I am not about to clean poop. out
of my closet. And I'm like, probably when we
start potty training, that's probably going to
happen. Like I am going to have to clean poop
out of weird places. But I was like, yesterday
was not the day that I wanted to do that. And
so that was my mom moment. Super fun. We didn't
end up with poop in the closet. Thank the Lord.
but yes. What is yours, Linnae? I actually just
got back on Sunday from Los Angeles where my
daughter lives and spent the weekend with her.
And I think, so her boyfriend was out of town.
So it was just her and I for the weekend. And
we, we were sitting there in her apartment and
we both had the epiphany, the realization that
we have been left unsupervised. Like we are the
adults. And we were like, we, They weren't smart.
They left us unsupervised. So it was just one
of those funny little moments where it's like
we're both grown adults but yet still feel like
we should not be left to our own devices. Who
is the parent in this situation? I was just talking
to one of my friends about the fact that I can't
believe that I have a two -year -old because
I feel too young to have a two -year -old. I'm
in my 30s and I'm like... We make this joke all
the time. Why are we teen moms? Yeah. Like I
totally feel like a teen mom. We're going to
get in trouble for living with boys and having
children. Right. Brett always tells me, she's
like, mom, we're going to be fine. We'll be in
the old folks home together because we're so
close in age. She's like, I treat my body like
trash. You treat yours really well. So we're
basically like physically the same age. So we'll
just be roommates in the old folks home. I love
that. Just playing cards together all day long.
I love it. Swapping teeth. Perfect. Well, cool.
So you kind of introed like how you found out
you were pregnant. Yeah. Tell us a little bit
more about your family. Tell us about your husband.
Yeah. So Ben married 30 years, just celebrated
30 years in June. Wow. High school sweetheart.
Met each other dancing, line dancing at a country
club. Love it. And he, these are his words. He
says he walked in and saw me from across the
room and said, oh, there she is. She is the one.
So, and then kind of the rest is history for
the two of us. I grew up in. Kind of an interesting
household. I was raised Mormon, so faith was
a huge piece of my upbringing, but yet not a
huge piece for me. Kind of left that faith when
I was like 14, started questioning it, which
didn't end well with the family structure. So
kind of an interesting upbringing, very religious,
but not very... Yeah. much what i believed so
yeah we'll also have to have a picture of you
to give the contrast of like you're not like
no one would ever think that you were raised
mormon fair yeah they won't take me back probably
not and we just learned you don't drink soda
so modern mormons yeah no like she's out yeah
she's done yeah that's so true um well so with
that upbringing assuming very conservative mormon
yes what was it like finding out you were pregnant
then at 16 um it was i mean shocking i mean obviously
i know how babies are made so i knew what could
happen obviously um but yeah i think it was just
the shock of it all like okay here we go and
i kind of just flipped a switch and was like
go mode like we just got to do this yeah Yeah.
How long were you and your husband together before
you found out you guys were. We started dating
in February and that was in May. OK. So was it
kind of like like what was the reaction I guess
of when. So you're in the hospital. Find out
you're pregnant. What. happened then? So I told
Sean first. He came in and like the timing of
him getting there was actually kind of cool because
they were getting ready to do an ultrasound to
make sure the baby was okay. So it was like instant,
like told him we were pregnant and then we got
to see the baby. How far along were you? I think
I was about 12 weeks. Okay. Right in there, 12,
13 weeks. Got it. Oh no, it may have been. No,
that sounds about right. Yeah. Okay. About 12
weeks. Yeah. And how was, what was his reaction
like? I think he was just as shocked as I was.
Yeah. And we were, it was that same kind of thing.
It was like, okay, here we go. You know, like
we're, we're going to do this. Yeah. So there
were, there was never like another option for
you? Not for me, me personally. The doctors suggested
being that my health was so jacked up. I've always
had stupid kidneys, like just have had issues
most of all my life. And then at this time I
was, um, I was a FFA kid. So I was at fair with
my pigs. So I had two hogs that I was showing
and selling. Um, and so I'm getting up at the
butt crack, you know, by myself taking care of
my pigs, not taking care of myself, which I think
is what made it even worse. Yeah. Not knowing
I was pregnant and just not taking care of myself
at all. So it was kind of like the perfect storm.
Wow. Yeah. But yeah, the doctors told me, being
that my health was not great, that I should terminate.
Wow. That both of us would not live through the
pregnancy. Whoa. And it was kind of like a challenge
accepted kind of a moment. Yeah. I was a bit
of a stubborn. And I always joke around that
it's like before I even knew what the Holy Spirit
felt like, I felt like God used my stubbornness.
I can look back in my life and see so many ways
where I was like, I don't know why I did what
I did. I'm thankful for it. Yeah. Yeah. And it
was like, there was, that was not an option for
me. Wow. And I feel like that stubbornness was
in Brit. A little bit. Like at that age too.
Because she's stubborn too. Just a little bit.
How did your family respond? Not great. My. Dad
had just retired. So this was the summer before
my senior year. And they were planning on, after
I graduated, to move to Idaho and to retire.
And they moved that fast forward. Like before
I got out of the hospital, bags were packed,
property was bought, and we were moving. Wow.
And so it was, I think there was... you know,
an unspoken trying to get me away from Sean because
he was the bad guy in this scenario. It was all
his fault. And, you know, they even told him
that he, you know, risked my life and put my
life at risk because of our choices. And I was
like, well, he also didn't know I had bad kidneys.
So. Required two people to make the choice. But
yeah, definitely the blame shifting. It was his
fault. So they wanted to get me away from him.
Wow. Did you end up moving with them then? And
how long were you in separate states, I guess?
Nine months. Okay. So once I turned 18 in the
following May and then graduated. So it was like,
Britt was born in February. I graduated, I turned
18 mid -May and then the end of May graduated.
And then it was like, okay, I wanted to get through
high school, wanted to graduate, didn't want
to have to do. extended school or anything and
so he showed up for my high school graduation
with the u -haul and was packing me up moving
me out and we got married june 3rd wow everything
in my life happened within a short period of
time. Yep. That's pretty quick. So you were then
pregnant with and living with your parents going
through high school. Um, did you go to like a
public high school? Yeah. Went to regular high
school. I was actually, um, homecoming queen.
Um, very pregnant queen, which I just, I don't
know why it just cracks me up. I still have my
crown. Uh, Sean flew out and took me to the homecoming.
So nice. Was there ever a moment? During that
time that your parents were like accepting of,
okay, this baby is coming and, you know, we love
this baby. I think when she was here. Yeah. Like,
because she was just the cutest thing. I don't
know how you couldn't have fallen in love with
her. She was just complete perfect little. Did
Sean get to be there when she was born? Yeah,
we actually, my water broke and we were heading
to the airport to pick him up. So went to the
airport. And then went straight to the hospital.
Wow. That sounds like a great labor experience
driving to the airport. So I'm told I'm not to
share my labor story. I slept through most of
my labor. Did you? I did. I mean, you were also
17, so. Wow. So I was just like, all right, this
is normal. Okay. Like, I didn't know I was having
contractions because I couldn't feel them. Yeah.
Wow. So you were just one of the lucky ones.
Dang. That's nice. And then how did Sean's family
react to the whole situation? Sean's family was
phenomenal. His mom actually had his older sister
when she was 16, 17, right around that same age.
His dad's response, he just sat there and cried.
Like he was excited because he was going to be
a grandpa and then just asked when we were going
to get married was kind of his next question.
So yeah, super supportive. complete opposite
sides of the spectrum for sure. And then were
they able to support you long distance at all?
Yeah. Like they, like for Christmas, they flew
me out to be with them and with their family.
And, um, which was wonderful to kind of start
to feel what it was like to be a part of their
family. Um, so that was really special. Yeah.
Cause you still have a good relationship with
them, right? Yeah. His mom lives with us. Okay.
I don't think. Yeah. I feel like your story is
so unique because, I mean, you and Sean are still
together. Like that's not a very common situation,
especially for teen, like really teen dating.
Yeah. Like high school sweethearts. True high
school sweethearts. Yeah. And then also like
throw in a baby on top of that. And people ask
Britt all the time if she knows her real dad.
Really? All the time. And she's like, yeah, he's
right here. This guy right here, like, raised
me. Like, still married to my mom, like, all
the time. DNA's the same. It's not even like
the, oh, he is my real dad, even though he's
not my real dad. It's like, no, like, legitimately.
Because you can't, her and I, we look so much
alike. And so it's like, they know, like, clearly
that's your mom. But do you know your real dad?
Yeah. Wow. Wow. That's really, that's really
interesting. I mean, it just shows, like. the
uncommonness of it. We're a bit stubborn. We
like to break statistics is what we've discovered.
So it's like high school sweethearts had a kid.
He's in law enforcement, which the divorce rates
like over 90%. Really? Yeah. It's ridiculous.
So it's like, well, we're just, we're going to
mess everything up. Yeah. I like it. I mean,
if you're going to do it, do it right. It's like
the stubbornness coming out again. Challenge
accepted. Hold my beer. I love it. How, um, Or
tell us a little bit more about, okay, so Brit
is born. Then tell us a little bit about your
experience of being a young mom. It was super
interesting because the small little tiny town
my parents moved to in Idaho, they didn't have
like a program for teen moms. So I like just
went to school. like I just went to school like
normal. And then she was born in February. So
after the first semester of school, um, I was
like, I don't, I like my biggest fear was literally
like my water to break at school. Yeah. I'm like,
that sounds like the worst thing in the world.
You're like, I will be remembered. Yes. I don't
want to be that girl. For having my water break
in science class. It would have probably been
welding. That's my guess. Welding. Which also
that. That's Linnea in a nutshell. She was taking
a welding class, well, nine months ago. Yes.
My welding instructor had to let me borrow his
overalls because mine got too small because I
had belly. That's amazing. Nothing was different,
really. After that first semester, I just did
homeschool. I would go in once a week, get my
work, take any tests. And then after Britt was
born, the librarian. loved her and so she would
like literally just hold and watch her while
i would take tests and stuff like that that's
so it was kind of crazy um that's like almost
an advantage of a small town yeah in that situation
i feel like where it's like well of course the
librarian's just gonna watch your kid like just
bring the baby in the holder i think about the
high schools around here i'm like that no that
would never happen no oh gosh no yeah wow and
then so you're still living with your family
or obviously you said they like fell in love
when she was born um how did they support you
while she was like but while you were finishing
high school your young mom uh it was interesting
because i was like bound and determined to figure
this out by myself so i didn't ask for advice
i didn't and when i was given advice it just
pissed me off like it made me angry it's like
especially if you're in a situation where you're
like I don't necessarily have a good relationship
with my family then like why would I take your
advice when this is our relationship yeah like
when I she was a porker and I was not producing
enough milk and so I I'm like this is silly I'm
nursing and then still having to give her a bottle
I'm like okay we're just we're done we're just
gonna do bottles and oh the guilt trip that I
got for that that I I'm just a terrible mom because
I'm not breastfeeding. And I'm like, well, she'll
starve to death if you would like me to do that
because that's the option. That's the other option
here. Wow. So it was things like that, that type
of tension where it just, you know, and also
trying to plan a wedding, which was super awkward
in the same scenario of all of that, trying to
finish school, you know, have a baby, trying
to plan a wedding. Yeah, all of those things
are stressful in and of themselves without being
stacked on top of each other and in an unsupportive
environment. Yeah. Yeah. Did Sean get to see
her a lot in those, like, few months between
when she was born and when you moved? He was
there when she was born, and then I – nope, that
was before she was born. There was, like, a few.
It wasn't a lot. Yeah. And so she was – so February,
March, April. She was, like, three. three months
old when we got married. So he kind of missed
a lot of that first little chunk. Yeah. Was that
extremely hard on him? Yeah. When she was born,
he would not let her out of his sight. Like he
walked her in, held her to get her first bath
and like everything. And we were in the room
and she was in the nursery and he's like, can
I go see the baby? And the nurse was like, yours
you can go get her she can be in here if you
want her to be in here and he was like yeah and
so it's like then it was like once he was like
oh yeah you're right but then it's also because
you're 17 so you're used to like asking permission
permission to go to the bathroom at school so
then all of a sudden you're responsible for this
human and you don't have to ask permission like
you're just you're treated like an adult because
You're essentially an adult in this. You are
an adult in this situation, whether you want
to be or not. What was like the, obviously with
newborn, sleep deprivation is a real thing. So
you're doing the nights on your own. What was
that like? And then also, you know, doing school.
Honestly, I think it was just, I was in survival
mode. Like, it's like, we just got to do this.
You know, it kind of was the theme of the whole
thing. Like, there wasn't an alternative. I don't
have another option other than, one, she was
a really, really good baby and a good sleeper,
which thank you, Jesus, because that helped huge.
But it was just a balance. It had to work. So
it was one of those where it's like, all right,
we're just going to figure this out. This has
to work. I think it's funny because so we both.
work from home with our kids and I I don't know
about you but people ask me all the time like
how do you make it work like it's just like that's
all of parenthood is you're just like well You
figure it out. I don't know. Like, yeah, you
just do like with everything and you survive.
Like, yeah, I don't know what to tell you. That's
just all we do is we figure it out. And, and
then somehow you're like, how did we do that?
Yeah, no, we were literally talking on Instagram
about, it was something about like how, you know,
life before kids, like what did, what did we
do with our free time? I don't even, I don't
even know. Like, I would just lay there and like
scroll for hours. I'm like, I actually feel more
productive now with kids than maybe pre -kids.
I don't know. At least some days I do because
I just am like, I got to get my stuff done. Like
I got no time other than now. So just do it.
Yeah. What was the best part about being a teen
mom? I would say like our lives now. Like she's
my best friend. That's so sweet. I mean, we just
have so much fun together. It's been a little
bit backwards for Sean and I, obviously, because
we didn't know life without a kid. Yeah. And
so it's like now that she's moved out and is
on her own, we're like, oh. Like figuring it
out. Like getting to know each other. Totally.
We bought a camper. We go camping like all the
time. Yeah. I feel like anytime I see you doing
anything, you're like, we're camping. Going camping.
Yes. So I think that's been like the coolest
thing is because we are. so close in age like
we just yeah we have such a super tight relationship
that's really and I know that's not always the
case but for us it's a huge blessing yeah did
you feel like you missed out on a lot of things
like so you got to do a lot of high school things
but then like going into young adulthood where
like people are going to college and partying
in college and just like doing those things that
you can't really do if you're a mom. Right. Do
you feel like you missed out on any of that?
Or, like, in the moment, did you feel like you
were missing out? Yeah, I was going to say, in
the moment, I didn't. Because I didn't know any
different. But, like, looking back, people will
be like, oh, they'll, like, bring up a scenario.
And I was like, yeah, I had a three -year -old.
Yeah. You know? Like, when they're doing normal,
you know, 20 -year -old things or 19 -year -old
things, I was like, yeah, I had a three -year
-old. I got nothing. Yeah. So I don't think I
realized. That I had missed out on a lot until
like later in life where I was like, oh. That
was your experience. Yeah. It's not the same.
Yeah. Do you feel like it was like a, oh man,
I'm sad I missed that? I don't think I ever felt
like a sadness or like, dang, I missed out because
I just adore this kid so much. You know, like
I wouldn't change anything. Yeah. At all. Yeah.
So. Did you and Sean ever talk about having more
kids? For like 3 .2 seconds. Really? It was funny.
Britt was about five and my sister -in -law was
pregnant. And we're like, okay, if we're going
to do it, like this would make sense. She would
have a cousin. Yeah. You know, because she was
the first grandchild on my husband, on Sean's
side. And so it was like, okay, if we're going
to do this, this would be the opportune time.
So it's like we sat down with Britt. We're like,
what do you think? And she was like, I mean.
absolutely no, there was nothing in her that
wanted a sibling. She was like, no. And I was
like, okay, well, we're going to pray about it.
We'll see, you know, kind of. And then in the
morning I was like, there's nothing in me that
wants to have another child. That's great. That's
crazy. Just to like be so certain. So yeah. And
I don't know if it was like, that was just that
God's provision, like trying to protect me that
maybe it would not have gone well if I tried
to have it. I have no idea. I can hypotheticalize
the whole thing, tell you in the face, but. There
was zero. Yeah, yeah. I love that because, I
mean, there's so many things in life that you're
like, should I go this way or should I go that
way? But, like, having that. literally so clear.
I think the big piece that I would have loved
to experience, the thing that I do look back
and go, oh, I wish I could have experienced this,
was Sean and I being together and pregnant and
having a baby, if that makes sense. I feel like
he missed out. So it was like, that was a big
piece that I was like, well, I would love for
us to have had this together, but that didn't.
win. That's fair. What did it look like? Like,
were you working as a young mom or was Sean like
the breadwinner and you were staying home? I
started working. She was pretty young. Gosh,
not even a year. So it was pretty early that
I went back to work and just had, um, like she
has two, she had two great grandmas that would
watch her. Um, All the time. I mean, that's one
nice thing about being a young parent is you're
like, great -grandparents are still alive and
still active. Yeah. So great -grandmas watched
her a ton, which was a huge blessing. So super.
And she is an old soul, I think, because of it.
Like, she literally is a little old lady inside.
Loves doilies and... Has hairless cats. And has
hairless... She's the crazy cat lady, but, you
know, edgy with hairless cats. I love it so much.
So what is something you wish you had known like
before this all happened or when you were like
in the weeds of getting through a pregnancy at
16 and being just like a super young mom? I don't
know that anything for me per se, but I think
like as like a parent that might be going through
it with their kid, you know, like. just love
them, like support them. And they're feeling
like I felt enough shame and all, I didn't need
anything else heaped on me. Most of the time
when we do something like we're not supposed
to, we don't need anyone. I didn't need more.
And so the, between, you know, family and then
the religion was just even worse. It was horrible.
The shame and the way that they treated me was
just absolutely terrible. I was like, just. I
would say just love them. They know what they
did. Just love them. Do you have a relationship
with your family at all? Was it like you moved
in? Peace out, never spoke to them again, or?
No, I tried. I tried for a long time. I even
would send Brett out in the summer to spend time
with my parents, and then my great -grandma lived
on the same property and my sister, and then
her godparents were across the street, so she
had this little, like, compound of people. The
blessings of the times that she went out there
was the relationship with my grandma, her great
-grandma, and her godparents. It did nothing
but damage the relationship with my parents.
That's a bummer. Yeah. It had the opposite effect
that I had hoped. I wanted to give them a chance
to be better grandparents than they were parents,
and that backfired big time. Sorry. So you no
longer have a relationship with them? It's minimal.
The door is starting to crack back open in their
elderly years. I'm now responding to text messages
and things like that, but that's about it. my
threshold right now yeah that makes sense yeah
I mean that's a lot to go through and I feel
like now as a parent not that like people people
don't really have like relationship with my kids
yet because they're still really young but even
just like seeing them get hurt and get frustrated
and like be treated poorly in any capacity like
that's so much worse so I would imagine like
if that's happening with if you're sending your
kid to spend time with someone and you find out
they're not treating them well yeah Like that's
going to be so much worse than anything you ever
did to me. Exactly. Oh, for sure. Absolutely.
Wow. That's super tough. Going back to the religion
piece. So left the Mormon faith. How did you
find Jesus? Randomly on a street corner. No,
I'm just kidding. It was, it literally just was
his pole. Like I found this church where my sister
and her husband were going and it was. Christian
-based biblical teaching literally would go through
chapter by chapter and verse by verse in the
Bible, which was super helpful for me as I'm
just trying to figure this out. And just kind
of was like, okay, this... Which surprises me
because going from something that was so religious
-based and faith works and all of that shenanigans
to like... Actually going back into technically
another religion, you know what I mean, was kind
of shocking. But at the same time, it's like
I think that there has just been that God spirit
instilled in me like since I was little. Like
I hated church when I was little. I was horrible,
absolutely horrible. So again, I think it was
just that. And just instilled in you. Yeah, and
just started really digging in and found it.
It felt completely different, I think, was what
was so appealing. And then I got baptized probably,
gosh, maybe a year later after I started going
to church and stuff. Yeah, you're probably walking
into the church a little bit hesitant, I'm sure.
Yeah, how was the church's response to your...
Not good. So they have what they call young men
and young women's group, but you're separated
boys and girls. And once they found out I was
pregnant, then I was then called to the nursery.
And so I was no longer allowed to be with my
peers. I had to work in the nursery. Really?
Wow. It was like the big old scarlet letter is
what it felt like. and just couldn't be, they,
I was the bad influence. I couldn't be around
my peers. And was that kind of like the, the
straw that broke the camel's back? Is that how
you say? Um, I had kind of walked away from it
before, but that was like, yeah. Yeah. I was
like, I will have nothing to do with this ever
again. There's the base shame that you feel.
And then mom and dad are adding onto that. And
then all of a sudden you have this like communal,
like going in public is shameful almost. Right.
Yeah. Wow. For sure. Yeah. I cannot even imagine
that. I feel like shame is such a thing that
like, obviously God doesn't want us to feel shame.
Right. And then, yeah, when it's just so blatantly
like right in front of you, it's like, how can
you not feel it? Of course. Yeah. When did you
stop attending the Mormon church then? Once I
moved out. Okay. Yeah. So did mom and dad like
require that you go while you were still in the
house? So yeah, once I left the house. The only
time I ever have gone back was for my nephews
both went on missions. And so I went to their
homecomings where they spoke at church and then
for funerals. But it's not a good relationship
with mom and dad, but it sounds like you do have
good relationship with your siblings. Is that
all of your siblings, just certain ones? No,
all of them. All of us are pretty. How are your
siblings? How many siblings do you have? I have,
there's four of us. Okay. Yeah. So I have two
older sisters and an older brother. I'm the youngest.
And what were their responses to the whole situation?
They were great. My brother, I can't remember
if he was still on his mission. I think he was
back and married, but not living in the state.
My oldest sister was like, okay, whatever you
need. Like she helped pack my room. My middle
sister like literally took Britt as like hers,
like in the most like loving way. She even, because
she had two boys. And she has five kids. All
of her kids are two years apart. And Britt just
fits in one of the weird gaps. And she's like,
that was my first girl because she had all boys
until her youngest. And she was phenomenal and
would also help watch her and love her. And she
just treated her like her own. And then she moved
out of state. She moved to Idaho to be closer
to my parents when Britt was pretty young. Yeah,
she was like maybe two. What would you say you
would tell somebody who's maybe going through
either teen pregnancy or they're a young mom?
Is there anything that you would advise them
of or anything that you would want to say? I,
I, for me, like there's so much joy on the other
side, like so much as hard as it is in the thick
of it in the day to day. It's hard. It's not,
it's not easy being a parent at any age I think
is hard. Like I don't, it doesn't matter, but
I feel like when you have so many cards stacked
against you from the beginning, but it's so worth
it. Like just push, just, you know, find some
support. The people that you can trust around
you, I think, is key. Just having something around
you that you feel like you can lean on, whether
that's faith or people or just something to not
feel like you're alone. You answered this a little
bit, but what would you say to the support system
of a young mom or a teen mom? What would I say
to them, to the support system? How can they
support better or best in your experience? strange
as it sounds is just treat them normal. Like
don't treat them like they're a teen mom. Like
they're a mom. Yeah. They're still a mom and
they still have to figure out all the mom stuff.
Um, so if they come to you and they need support,
like just be there for them as a friend, as a
fellow mom or whatever kind of that relationship
is. I think that constant like reminder that
they're a teen mom doesn't really help, you know?
Again, they already know that. They know that.
Clearly. No reminder necessary there. There's
enough eyes. There's enough, yeah, enough outside
shame or whatever. What would you say to a mom
who maybe is experiencing religious shame, again,
whether it's because she's a young mom, a single
mom, something, just religious shame for however
her situation is? Yeah, I think the biggest piece
and reminder of... Like carrying that is, it's
not yours to carry. Like that shame is not how
our God wants us to feel. And that's not coming
from him. That's coming from something else.
And so just focusing on the joy that is that
child that you have, man, that, that can take
it all away. If you just look at the joy of this
little, little munchkin that you, that you have
that, who knows, maybe this was a special gift
that you could not have had later. Like who knows
the whole bigger picture? Like only God knows
that. But I think just like, just pushing that
aside, focusing on what you have and the fact
that you're a mom. You are just, not just, but
you're a mom. You're not a teen mom. You're a
mom. And trying to like break some of that stigma
that comes along with it. Do you feel like that
joy like kicked in for you right away whenever
you held Brit for the first time? Oh yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. She was just, she had these big giant brown
eyes and red hair that just stuck up. Like she
was born with bright red hair. And she looked
like a little baby orangutan, like in the cutest
way ever. That is amazing. I'm going to have
to see a picture of her as a baby. But was just,
yeah. And she just, there was something special
about her from day one. Yeah. Yeah. Just an amazing
human. Yeah. She was meant for you. Yep. Yeah.
That's amazing. Well, thank you for sharing your
story. And I hope, yeah, I hope a few young moms
will listen to this and be encouraged by your
story. Is there anything else you want to share
before we wrap up? I would just like kind of
continuing on that, like the hope piece, like
being a mom young, like you still have so many
years after. Like Britt moved out, gosh, I don't
even think I was 40 yet. you know and it was
like guys i've got so many more years to just
have fun yeah and not only like with my husband
but like with her like we have so much fun together
the two of us yeah and so i think that could
be something to hold on to like when when it
is hard like man it gets so good yeah so good
Is there any, like, do you look back on Brit's
childhood and really miss it? Like, do you wish
you could go back to some of those days? Or are
you just like, you know, we're living in the
good old days right now. Yeah, I think like life
is just really good. Like she's really good and
Sean and I are really good. So it's like, man,
like we just love where we're at now for sure.
I love that. That's great. Well, thank you so
much for sharing your story. It's super encouraging.
And yeah, it just shows like you can come from
hardship and walk out the other side and just
live in this joy. And you have such a beautiful
family. So appreciate you sharing your story
today. Thank you so much. Yeah. Well, we like
to kind of close our podcast with our wins of
the week. This could be from this week or it
could be, you know, from. from a long time ago,
too. But Erica, do you have a win you want to
share? So Lloyd loves looking at pictures, and
he requests to look at pictures on our phones,
and we try to avoid just giving him our phone
to look at pictures. So I pulled out our wedding
album recently, and it's just his favorite thing.
He just flips through the pictures, and they're
like, Papa, Op -Op, G -Ma, Mom, Dad, Auntie Carl,
Aunt Caitlin. And he just points out all the
people he knows, and he just flips through, and
it's... just the sweetest thing. And he absolutely
loves it. And so I'm like, maybe I just need
to start getting photo out. Like, yeah, just
like printing, actually printing photos and just
so many times that's gone through my head. Cause
he loves it. Like if he asked for pictures on
my phone and I just hand him the album or the
other day he brought it to me, he's like, read
it. There's no words to read, but we can tell
you about it. I love that. Okay, my win, it actually
was this morning. So I was at home. Michael was
golfing. And so I was just with the kids. And
there was a moment where I ran upstairs and I
think I was like, I don't know, I had to go to
the bathroom or something. And then walked back
downstairs and Cruz was in the living room and
Colt was in the kitchen, like playing in the
sink. I can like sit on the stairs right there
and like see it in both rooms. So I just sat
there and I just like watched them for a minute.
And I just like it literally brought tears to
my eyes because I was like, I'm literally living
what I've always dreamed of as Cruz is crying.
But literally what I'm like, I am in what I've
always prayed for right now. And I'm just here.
I'm watching my kids just like. live their lives
and I get to just observe that and that is like
I just was like I literally said out loud I was
like thank you Jesus because this is just it's
so beautiful and I'm like I love this so much
and yeah I have hard days and Obviously, Cruz
has hard days. He's just saying the same thing.
Yeah. He's like, I love you, Mom. But it just,
yeah, I'm just so blessed. And it just was like
a moment of realizing that. So, yeah. Yeah. What
about you, Linnea? I would say it was part of
my trip that I was just in. We went and saw one
of our favorite movies is The Princess Bride.
Classic. And they were showing it at the Hollywood
Cemetery. I know that sounds super weird, but
it was so cool. We're not like sitting there
leading at headstones or anything. It was like
in a park area. Okay. And we were sitting there
and she looks over at me and she's like, I miss
Chris, which is her boyfriend. She's like, but
mama, I needed this. That's so sweet. Yeah. That
is really sweet. And that's such a testament
of like how great of a mom you are too. That's
like, I mean, cause we haven't had one on one
time. It's been gosh, quite a few. I mean, it's
been a couple of years cause we used to go like
backpacking and camping and all sorts of stuff.
But since she moved to LA, that's made it harder.
So it was, yeah. So it was neat to just realize
that we both really needed that, which was super
special. That was super special. It was really
special. Well, thank you so much for coming onto
our podcast and, Yeah, we just really appreciate
you and your story. But, yeah, thanks for listening,
you guys. Cruz has a lot to say, obviously, to
close us out. And we will see you next week.
See you next week.