WEBVTT 00:00:12.810 --> 00:00:15.810 Welcome back to No Manual on MomCast, where we're 00:00:15.810 --> 00:00:17.570 just talking about the realities of motherhood, 00:00:17.710 --> 00:00:20.390 the funny things, the less funny things, and 00:00:20.390 --> 00:00:23.929 we love to share stories. So today we have on 00:00:23.929 --> 00:00:27.589 our friend Linnae Jenian, who was a teen mom, 00:00:27.809 --> 00:00:30.089 and yeah, she's just going to share her story. 00:00:30.149 --> 00:00:32.049 So Linnae, tell us just a little bit about yourself. 00:00:33.090 --> 00:00:38.070 I have an amazing 30 -year -old child, my daughter. 00:00:38.170 --> 00:00:41.960 She is just the absolute... most amazing human 00:00:41.960 --> 00:00:46.640 on the planet. I was 16 when I got pregnant, 00:00:46.759 --> 00:00:52.920 17 when I had her, and was actually in the hospital 00:00:52.920 --> 00:00:56.280 when I found out I was pregnant. Um, which kind 00:00:56.280 --> 00:00:58.280 of made things a little bit, even more weird 00:00:58.280 --> 00:01:02.500 being, um, 16 in the hospital, um, and trying 00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:04.959 to figure out why my kidneys were failing. And 00:01:04.959 --> 00:01:07.340 so the doctor was like, is there a chance that 00:01:07.340 --> 00:01:09.280 you can be pregnant? And I was like, well, yeah, 00:01:09.459 --> 00:01:11.180 there, there, there could be a chance. Yeah. 00:01:11.359 --> 00:01:16.340 Yes. Um, and so they, uh, ran a pregnancy test 00:01:16.340 --> 00:01:19.299 and it came back positive. So I was in the hospital, 00:01:19.379 --> 00:01:23.659 found out I was pregnant. Wow. Well, we'll get 00:01:23.659 --> 00:01:27.739 more in depth with your story as we go. First, 00:01:27.939 --> 00:01:31.239 let's hop into our mom moment. So this is something 00:01:31.239 --> 00:01:34.019 random, something good, something bad, something 00:01:34.019 --> 00:01:37.319 sad. Erica, do you want to share yours first? 00:01:37.319 --> 00:01:39.920 I feel like I have so many right now. I was having 00:01:39.920 --> 00:01:43.500 a hard time choosing. But so Lloyd from like. 00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:46.500 pretty young i had kind of a feeling he was going 00:01:46.500 --> 00:01:48.480 to be more introverted just like the way he interacted 00:01:48.480 --> 00:01:50.359 with people he takes a little bit to warm up 00:01:50.359 --> 00:01:52.379 but then when he's around his people he's like 00:01:52.379 --> 00:01:55.939 just such a goober and the other day it was like 00:01:55.939 --> 00:01:58.480 kind of confirmed because we were at a neighbor's 00:01:58.480 --> 00:02:01.420 house for our birthday party and he kept asking 00:02:01.420 --> 00:02:03.920 to go to the bathroom like i go potty i go potty 00:02:03.920 --> 00:02:06.420 like okay so like i would take him then stewart 00:02:06.420 --> 00:02:08.419 would take him and then finally he goes i go 00:02:08.419 --> 00:02:12.469 potty at home oh you you want to Like, why do 00:02:12.469 --> 00:02:15.289 you need to go home? I go car, I go home. We 00:02:15.289 --> 00:02:16.930 don't need to go in the car to go home. And we 00:02:16.930 --> 00:02:18.750 like kept trying to figure it out. I go home. 00:02:18.789 --> 00:02:21.469 Oh, you're just tired. You just don't want to 00:02:21.469 --> 00:02:23.650 be here anymore. You just want to go home. And 00:02:23.650 --> 00:02:26.349 then we went home and he was fine. It was just 00:02:26.349 --> 00:02:28.509 a really funny way that like going potty was 00:02:28.509 --> 00:02:31.169 his way of escaping, interacting with people, 00:02:31.210 --> 00:02:32.810 which I guess as an introvert, like that's what 00:02:32.810 --> 00:02:34.889 you do at parties, right? Yeah. Go hide in the 00:02:34.889 --> 00:02:36.889 bathroom. Hey, he's catching on to like what 00:02:36.889 --> 00:02:39.719 every male does. Yes. Just go to the bathroom 00:02:39.719 --> 00:02:41.900 for a few minutes. Yeah. Not just a few, like 00:02:41.900 --> 00:02:46.620 20, 30. I love it. Okay. So my mom moment is 00:02:46.620 --> 00:02:50.580 also a potty situation. So it was yesterday. 00:02:51.020 --> 00:02:53.580 We're not really starting potty training yet, 00:02:53.639 --> 00:02:55.580 but like just getting Colt familiar with the 00:02:55.580 --> 00:02:57.159 potty. So I'll ask him like, you want to go pee 00:02:57.159 --> 00:02:59.639 in the potty? And yesterday morning he was like, 00:02:59.699 --> 00:03:02.400 yes. And so I like get him to the potty, take 00:03:02.400 --> 00:03:04.539 off his diaper. He goes pee in the potty and 00:03:04.539 --> 00:03:06.479 he's really excited. He gets a chocolate covered 00:03:06.479 --> 00:03:08.659 gummy bear every time he goes pee in the potty. 00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:13.099 And then I go to put his diaper back on and he's 00:03:13.099 --> 00:03:16.419 like, no, no. And like alligator rolling, like 00:03:16.419 --> 00:03:21.159 just full on tantrum to get this diaper on. And 00:03:21.159 --> 00:03:24.240 he runs away from me, pantsless, runs into my 00:03:24.240 --> 00:03:26.460 closet, which is a normal place he likes to go 00:03:26.460 --> 00:03:30.020 poop. And he said, poopoo, mama, poopoo. And 00:03:30.020 --> 00:03:32.919 I was like, no, buddy, do not poop in my closet. 00:03:33.400 --> 00:03:36.620 I'm like, I, oh, my gosh. I was, like, freaking 00:03:36.620 --> 00:03:38.719 out. Was this during the day when Michael was 00:03:38.719 --> 00:03:41.039 gone, too? No. Thank goodness he was there. He 00:03:41.039 --> 00:03:43.319 was just, like, hanging out on the bed with Cruz. 00:03:43.599 --> 00:03:46.000 And he was like, Colt, don't do it. Don't do 00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:48.379 it. And thankfully I get Colt out. But it's, 00:03:48.400 --> 00:03:50.520 like, full -on tantrum trying to, like, hold 00:03:50.520 --> 00:03:53.699 him down to, like, put his diaper back on. So 00:03:53.699 --> 00:03:56.050 I was like, I am not about to clean poop. out 00:03:56.050 --> 00:03:58.330 of my closet. And I'm like, probably when we 00:03:58.330 --> 00:04:00.169 start potty training, that's probably going to 00:04:00.169 --> 00:04:02.210 happen. Like I am going to have to clean poop 00:04:02.210 --> 00:04:05.349 out of weird places. But I was like, yesterday 00:04:05.349 --> 00:04:08.650 was not the day that I wanted to do that. And 00:04:08.650 --> 00:04:13.110 so that was my mom moment. Super fun. We didn't 00:04:13.110 --> 00:04:15.090 end up with poop in the closet. Thank the Lord. 00:04:15.610 --> 00:04:19.009 but yes. What is yours, Linnae? I actually just 00:04:19.009 --> 00:04:21.790 got back on Sunday from Los Angeles where my 00:04:21.790 --> 00:04:23.750 daughter lives and spent the weekend with her. 00:04:24.410 --> 00:04:27.670 And I think, so her boyfriend was out of town. 00:04:27.769 --> 00:04:30.170 So it was just her and I for the weekend. And 00:04:30.170 --> 00:04:33.129 we, we were sitting there in her apartment and 00:04:33.129 --> 00:04:36.490 we both had the epiphany, the realization that 00:04:36.490 --> 00:04:40.649 we have been left unsupervised. Like we are the 00:04:40.649 --> 00:04:46.689 adults. And we were like, we, They weren't smart. 00:04:46.790 --> 00:04:49.670 They left us unsupervised. So it was just one 00:04:49.670 --> 00:04:51.769 of those funny little moments where it's like 00:04:51.769 --> 00:04:54.670 we're both grown adults but yet still feel like 00:04:54.670 --> 00:04:58.350 we should not be left to our own devices. Who 00:04:58.350 --> 00:05:02.209 is the parent in this situation? I was just talking 00:05:02.209 --> 00:05:04.870 to one of my friends about the fact that I can't 00:05:04.870 --> 00:05:06.649 believe that I have a two -year -old because 00:05:06.649 --> 00:05:09.790 I feel too young to have a two -year -old. I'm 00:05:09.790 --> 00:05:12.449 in my 30s and I'm like... We make this joke all 00:05:12.449 --> 00:05:15.740 the time. Why are we teen moms? Yeah. Like I 00:05:15.740 --> 00:05:17.160 totally feel like a teen mom. We're going to 00:05:17.160 --> 00:05:19.860 get in trouble for living with boys and having 00:05:19.860 --> 00:05:22.560 children. Right. Brett always tells me, she's 00:05:22.560 --> 00:05:24.220 like, mom, we're going to be fine. We'll be in 00:05:24.220 --> 00:05:26.259 the old folks home together because we're so 00:05:26.259 --> 00:05:28.819 close in age. She's like, I treat my body like 00:05:28.819 --> 00:05:30.819 trash. You treat yours really well. So we're 00:05:30.819 --> 00:05:34.040 basically like physically the same age. So we'll 00:05:34.040 --> 00:05:36.060 just be roommates in the old folks home. I love 00:05:36.060 --> 00:05:40.199 that. Just playing cards together all day long. 00:05:40.300 --> 00:05:43.970 I love it. Swapping teeth. Perfect. Well, cool. 00:05:44.009 --> 00:05:48.290 So you kind of introed like how you found out 00:05:48.290 --> 00:05:50.189 you were pregnant. Yeah. Tell us a little bit 00:05:50.189 --> 00:05:52.910 more about your family. Tell us about your husband. 00:05:53.430 --> 00:05:57.610 Yeah. So Ben married 30 years, just celebrated 00:05:57.610 --> 00:06:00.389 30 years in June. Wow. High school sweetheart. 00:06:01.410 --> 00:06:05.329 Met each other dancing, line dancing at a country 00:06:05.329 --> 00:06:09.009 club. Love it. And he, these are his words. He 00:06:09.009 --> 00:06:11.310 says he walked in and saw me from across the 00:06:11.310 --> 00:06:13.889 room and said, oh, there she is. She is the one. 00:06:14.810 --> 00:06:17.310 So, and then kind of the rest is history for 00:06:17.310 --> 00:06:22.000 the two of us. I grew up in. Kind of an interesting 00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.120 household. I was raised Mormon, so faith was 00:06:26.120 --> 00:06:29.199 a huge piece of my upbringing, but yet not a 00:06:29.199 --> 00:06:33.120 huge piece for me. Kind of left that faith when 00:06:33.120 --> 00:06:35.819 I was like 14, started questioning it, which 00:06:35.819 --> 00:06:40.160 didn't end well with the family structure. So 00:06:40.160 --> 00:06:42.839 kind of an interesting upbringing, very religious, 00:06:42.879 --> 00:06:46.589 but not very... Yeah. much what i believed so 00:06:46.589 --> 00:06:48.490 yeah we'll also have to have a picture of you 00:06:48.490 --> 00:06:51.949 to give the contrast of like you're not like 00:06:51.949 --> 00:06:53.889 no one would ever think that you were raised 00:06:53.889 --> 00:07:00.449 mormon fair yeah they won't take me back probably 00:07:00.449 --> 00:07:03.810 not and we just learned you don't drink soda 00:07:03.810 --> 00:07:07.389 so modern mormons yeah no like she's out yeah 00:07:07.389 --> 00:07:12.050 she's done yeah that's so true um well so with 00:07:12.050 --> 00:07:15.310 that upbringing assuming very conservative mormon 00:07:15.310 --> 00:07:17.970 yes what was it like finding out you were pregnant 00:07:17.970 --> 00:07:24.089 then at 16 um it was i mean shocking i mean obviously 00:07:24.089 --> 00:07:28.449 i know how babies are made so i knew what could 00:07:28.449 --> 00:07:32.230 happen obviously um but yeah i think it was just 00:07:32.230 --> 00:07:35.529 the shock of it all like okay here we go and 00:07:35.529 --> 00:07:39.009 i kind of just flipped a switch and was like 00:07:39.009 --> 00:07:42.970 go mode like we just got to do this yeah Yeah. 00:07:43.209 --> 00:07:47.189 How long were you and your husband together before 00:07:47.189 --> 00:07:49.990 you found out you guys were. We started dating 00:07:49.990 --> 00:07:53.569 in February and that was in May. OK. So was it 00:07:53.569 --> 00:07:56.269 kind of like like what was the reaction I guess 00:07:56.269 --> 00:07:59.170 of when. So you're in the hospital. Find out 00:07:59.170 --> 00:08:02.579 you're pregnant. What. happened then? So I told 00:08:02.579 --> 00:08:06.240 Sean first. He came in and like the timing of 00:08:06.240 --> 00:08:08.800 him getting there was actually kind of cool because 00:08:08.800 --> 00:08:10.319 they were getting ready to do an ultrasound to 00:08:10.319 --> 00:08:13.819 make sure the baby was okay. So it was like instant, 00:08:13.959 --> 00:08:16.620 like told him we were pregnant and then we got 00:08:16.620 --> 00:08:21.279 to see the baby. How far along were you? I think 00:08:21.279 --> 00:08:26.060 I was about 12 weeks. Okay. Right in there, 12, 00:08:26.120 --> 00:08:28.740 13 weeks. Got it. Oh no, it may have been. No, 00:08:28.800 --> 00:08:30.879 that sounds about right. Yeah. Okay. About 12 00:08:30.879 --> 00:08:33.559 weeks. Yeah. And how was, what was his reaction 00:08:33.559 --> 00:08:36.600 like? I think he was just as shocked as I was. 00:08:36.659 --> 00:08:39.539 Yeah. And we were, it was that same kind of thing. 00:08:39.539 --> 00:08:42.419 It was like, okay, here we go. You know, like 00:08:42.419 --> 00:08:44.419 we're, we're going to do this. Yeah. So there 00:08:44.419 --> 00:08:47.440 were, there was never like another option for 00:08:47.440 --> 00:08:51.580 you? Not for me, me personally. The doctors suggested 00:08:51.580 --> 00:08:55.350 being that my health was so jacked up. I've always 00:08:55.350 --> 00:08:57.789 had stupid kidneys, like just have had issues 00:08:57.789 --> 00:09:00.570 most of all my life. And then at this time I 00:09:00.570 --> 00:09:04.450 was, um, I was a FFA kid. So I was at fair with 00:09:04.450 --> 00:09:06.830 my pigs. So I had two hogs that I was showing 00:09:06.830 --> 00:09:09.929 and selling. Um, and so I'm getting up at the 00:09:09.929 --> 00:09:12.809 butt crack, you know, by myself taking care of 00:09:12.809 --> 00:09:15.429 my pigs, not taking care of myself, which I think 00:09:15.429 --> 00:09:17.870 is what made it even worse. Yeah. Not knowing 00:09:17.870 --> 00:09:20.669 I was pregnant and just not taking care of myself 00:09:20.669 --> 00:09:23.289 at all. So it was kind of like the perfect storm. 00:09:24.040 --> 00:09:27.000 Wow. Yeah. But yeah, the doctors told me, being 00:09:27.000 --> 00:09:30.259 that my health was not great, that I should terminate. 00:09:30.259 --> 00:09:33.200 Wow. That both of us would not live through the 00:09:33.200 --> 00:09:37.799 pregnancy. Whoa. And it was kind of like a challenge 00:09:37.799 --> 00:09:39.519 accepted kind of a moment. Yeah. I was a bit 00:09:39.519 --> 00:09:41.960 of a stubborn. And I always joke around that 00:09:41.960 --> 00:09:43.700 it's like before I even knew what the Holy Spirit 00:09:43.700 --> 00:09:46.220 felt like, I felt like God used my stubbornness. 00:09:47.320 --> 00:09:50.080 I can look back in my life and see so many ways 00:09:50.080 --> 00:09:52.960 where I was like, I don't know why I did what 00:09:52.960 --> 00:09:56.730 I did. I'm thankful for it. Yeah. Yeah. And it 00:09:56.730 --> 00:09:58.590 was like, there was, that was not an option for 00:09:58.590 --> 00:10:01.149 me. Wow. And I feel like that stubbornness was 00:10:01.149 --> 00:10:04.190 in Brit. A little bit. Like at that age too. 00:10:04.309 --> 00:10:06.909 Because she's stubborn too. Just a little bit. 00:10:08.750 --> 00:10:16.549 How did your family respond? Not great. My. Dad 00:10:16.549 --> 00:10:20.330 had just retired. So this was the summer before 00:10:20.330 --> 00:10:23.350 my senior year. And they were planning on, after 00:10:23.350 --> 00:10:27.009 I graduated, to move to Idaho and to retire. 00:10:27.309 --> 00:10:31.769 And they moved that fast forward. Like before 00:10:31.769 --> 00:10:34.669 I got out of the hospital, bags were packed, 00:10:34.769 --> 00:10:37.190 property was bought, and we were moving. Wow. 00:10:37.789 --> 00:10:41.519 And so it was, I think there was... you know, 00:10:41.519 --> 00:10:44.620 an unspoken trying to get me away from Sean because 00:10:44.620 --> 00:10:48.259 he was the bad guy in this scenario. It was all 00:10:48.259 --> 00:10:50.840 his fault. And, you know, they even told him 00:10:50.840 --> 00:10:54.720 that he, you know, risked my life and put my 00:10:54.720 --> 00:10:57.600 life at risk because of our choices. And I was 00:10:57.600 --> 00:10:59.759 like, well, he also didn't know I had bad kidneys. 00:11:00.980 --> 00:11:06.000 So. Required two people to make the choice. But 00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:07.879 yeah, definitely the blame shifting. It was his 00:11:07.879 --> 00:11:09.559 fault. So they wanted to get me away from him. 00:11:09.980 --> 00:11:12.539 Wow. Did you end up moving with them then? And 00:11:12.539 --> 00:11:15.840 how long were you in separate states, I guess? 00:11:16.019 --> 00:11:19.980 Nine months. Okay. So once I turned 18 in the 00:11:19.980 --> 00:11:24.019 following May and then graduated. So it was like, 00:11:24.039 --> 00:11:28.240 Britt was born in February. I graduated, I turned 00:11:28.240 --> 00:11:32.179 18 mid -May and then the end of May graduated. 00:11:32.740 --> 00:11:36.039 And then it was like, okay, I wanted to get through 00:11:36.039 --> 00:11:37.799 high school, wanted to graduate, didn't want 00:11:37.799 --> 00:11:40.200 to have to do. extended school or anything and 00:11:40.200 --> 00:11:41.940 so he showed up for my high school graduation 00:11:41.940 --> 00:11:46.059 with the u -haul and was packing me up moving 00:11:46.059 --> 00:11:51.240 me out and we got married june 3rd wow everything 00:11:51.240 --> 00:11:54.269 in my life happened within a short period of 00:11:54.269 --> 00:11:57.190 time. Yep. That's pretty quick. So you were then 00:11:57.190 --> 00:12:00.429 pregnant with and living with your parents going 00:12:00.429 --> 00:12:03.210 through high school. Um, did you go to like a 00:12:03.210 --> 00:12:05.350 public high school? Yeah. Went to regular high 00:12:05.350 --> 00:12:07.549 school. I was actually, um, homecoming queen. 00:12:07.850 --> 00:12:11.690 Um, very pregnant queen, which I just, I don't 00:12:11.690 --> 00:12:13.169 know why it just cracks me up. I still have my 00:12:13.169 --> 00:12:17.169 crown. Uh, Sean flew out and took me to the homecoming. 00:12:17.190 --> 00:12:21.179 So nice. Was there ever a moment? During that 00:12:21.179 --> 00:12:23.820 time that your parents were like accepting of, 00:12:23.899 --> 00:12:29.580 okay, this baby is coming and, you know, we love 00:12:29.580 --> 00:12:32.899 this baby. I think when she was here. Yeah. Like, 00:12:32.899 --> 00:12:35.059 because she was just the cutest thing. I don't 00:12:35.059 --> 00:12:36.419 know how you couldn't have fallen in love with 00:12:36.419 --> 00:12:39.159 her. She was just complete perfect little. Did 00:12:39.159 --> 00:12:41.039 Sean get to be there when she was born? Yeah, 00:12:41.059 --> 00:12:44.100 we actually, my water broke and we were heading 00:12:44.100 --> 00:12:46.419 to the airport to pick him up. So went to the 00:12:46.419 --> 00:12:48.320 airport. And then went straight to the hospital. 00:12:48.519 --> 00:12:50.039 Wow. That sounds like a great labor experience 00:12:50.039 --> 00:12:54.620 driving to the airport. So I'm told I'm not to 00:12:54.620 --> 00:12:56.899 share my labor story. I slept through most of 00:12:56.899 --> 00:12:59.340 my labor. Did you? I did. I mean, you were also 00:12:59.340 --> 00:13:04.399 17, so. Wow. So I was just like, all right, this 00:13:04.399 --> 00:13:07.519 is normal. Okay. Like, I didn't know I was having 00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:09.419 contractions because I couldn't feel them. Yeah. 00:13:09.580 --> 00:13:11.840 Wow. So you were just one of the lucky ones. 00:13:12.970 --> 00:13:17.029 Dang. That's nice. And then how did Sean's family 00:13:17.029 --> 00:13:20.350 react to the whole situation? Sean's family was 00:13:20.350 --> 00:13:24.230 phenomenal. His mom actually had his older sister 00:13:24.230 --> 00:13:28.149 when she was 16, 17, right around that same age. 00:13:28.889 --> 00:13:31.789 His dad's response, he just sat there and cried. 00:13:31.970 --> 00:13:34.090 Like he was excited because he was going to be 00:13:34.090 --> 00:13:36.350 a grandpa and then just asked when we were going 00:13:36.350 --> 00:13:38.870 to get married was kind of his next question. 00:13:39.049 --> 00:13:42.659 So yeah, super supportive. complete opposite 00:13:42.659 --> 00:13:44.899 sides of the spectrum for sure. And then were 00:13:44.899 --> 00:13:48.700 they able to support you long distance at all? 00:13:48.740 --> 00:13:50.679 Yeah. Like they, like for Christmas, they flew 00:13:50.679 --> 00:13:53.000 me out to be with them and with their family. 00:13:53.360 --> 00:13:57.179 And, um, which was wonderful to kind of start 00:13:57.179 --> 00:13:59.299 to feel what it was like to be a part of their 00:13:59.299 --> 00:14:02.799 family. Um, so that was really special. Yeah. 00:14:02.919 --> 00:14:05.080 Cause you still have a good relationship with 00:14:05.080 --> 00:14:07.240 them, right? Yeah. His mom lives with us. Okay. 00:14:07.320 --> 00:14:10.610 I don't think. Yeah. I feel like your story is 00:14:10.610 --> 00:14:13.490 so unique because, I mean, you and Sean are still 00:14:13.490 --> 00:14:17.750 together. Like that's not a very common situation, 00:14:17.990 --> 00:14:21.750 especially for teen, like really teen dating. 00:14:21.889 --> 00:14:24.029 Yeah. Like high school sweethearts. True high 00:14:24.029 --> 00:14:27.330 school sweethearts. Yeah. And then also like 00:14:27.330 --> 00:14:30.429 throw in a baby on top of that. And people ask 00:14:30.429 --> 00:14:32.230 Britt all the time if she knows her real dad. 00:14:32.429 --> 00:14:36.190 Really? All the time. And she's like, yeah, he's 00:14:36.190 --> 00:14:37.710 right here. This guy right here, like, raised 00:14:37.710 --> 00:14:39.870 me. Like, still married to my mom, like, all 00:14:39.870 --> 00:14:42.090 the time. DNA's the same. It's not even like 00:14:42.090 --> 00:14:44.370 the, oh, he is my real dad, even though he's 00:14:44.370 --> 00:14:46.269 not my real dad. It's like, no, like, legitimately. 00:14:46.789 --> 00:14:48.850 Because you can't, her and I, we look so much 00:14:48.850 --> 00:14:51.590 alike. And so it's like, they know, like, clearly 00:14:51.590 --> 00:14:53.309 that's your mom. But do you know your real dad? 00:14:53.509 --> 00:14:57.590 Yeah. Wow. Wow. That's really, that's really 00:14:57.590 --> 00:14:59.779 interesting. I mean, it just shows, like. the 00:14:59.779 --> 00:15:02.840 uncommonness of it. We're a bit stubborn. We 00:15:02.840 --> 00:15:05.200 like to break statistics is what we've discovered. 00:15:05.399 --> 00:15:07.960 So it's like high school sweethearts had a kid. 00:15:08.139 --> 00:15:10.299 He's in law enforcement, which the divorce rates 00:15:10.299 --> 00:15:13.799 like over 90%. Really? Yeah. It's ridiculous. 00:15:14.039 --> 00:15:15.759 So it's like, well, we're just, we're going to 00:15:15.759 --> 00:15:18.559 mess everything up. Yeah. I like it. I mean, 00:15:18.600 --> 00:15:20.200 if you're going to do it, do it right. It's like 00:15:20.200 --> 00:15:23.039 the stubbornness coming out again. Challenge 00:15:23.039 --> 00:15:29.980 accepted. Hold my beer. I love it. How, um, Or 00:15:29.980 --> 00:15:32.200 tell us a little bit more about, okay, so Brit 00:15:32.200 --> 00:15:35.320 is born. Then tell us a little bit about your 00:15:35.320 --> 00:15:39.419 experience of being a young mom. It was super 00:15:39.419 --> 00:15:42.620 interesting because the small little tiny town 00:15:42.620 --> 00:15:45.080 my parents moved to in Idaho, they didn't have 00:15:45.080 --> 00:15:48.639 like a program for teen moms. So I like just 00:15:48.639 --> 00:15:51.379 went to school. like I just went to school like 00:15:51.379 --> 00:15:53.860 normal. And then she was born in February. So 00:15:53.860 --> 00:15:57.639 after the first semester of school, um, I was 00:15:57.639 --> 00:15:59.879 like, I don't, I like my biggest fear was literally 00:15:59.879 --> 00:16:01.720 like my water to break at school. Yeah. I'm like, 00:16:01.799 --> 00:16:03.860 that sounds like the worst thing in the world. 00:16:03.940 --> 00:16:06.059 You're like, I will be remembered. Yes. I don't 00:16:06.059 --> 00:16:07.940 want to be that girl. For having my water break 00:16:07.940 --> 00:16:10.379 in science class. It would have probably been 00:16:10.379 --> 00:16:13.580 welding. That's my guess. Welding. Which also 00:16:13.580 --> 00:16:17.289 that. That's Linnea in a nutshell. She was taking 00:16:17.289 --> 00:16:19.870 a welding class, well, nine months ago. Yes. 00:16:19.870 --> 00:16:22.710 My welding instructor had to let me borrow his 00:16:22.710 --> 00:16:25.590 overalls because mine got too small because I 00:16:25.590 --> 00:16:32.250 had belly. That's amazing. Nothing was different, 00:16:32.330 --> 00:16:34.210 really. After that first semester, I just did 00:16:34.210 --> 00:16:37.169 homeschool. I would go in once a week, get my 00:16:37.169 --> 00:16:41.029 work, take any tests. And then after Britt was 00:16:41.029 --> 00:16:45.159 born, the librarian. loved her and so she would 00:16:45.159 --> 00:16:47.720 like literally just hold and watch her while 00:16:47.720 --> 00:16:50.460 i would take tests and stuff like that that's 00:16:50.460 --> 00:16:53.139 so it was kind of crazy um that's like almost 00:16:53.139 --> 00:16:55.480 an advantage of a small town yeah in that situation 00:16:55.480 --> 00:16:57.299 i feel like where it's like well of course the 00:16:57.299 --> 00:16:58.960 librarian's just gonna watch your kid like just 00:16:58.960 --> 00:17:01.480 bring the baby in the holder i think about the 00:17:01.480 --> 00:17:03.720 high schools around here i'm like that no that 00:17:03.720 --> 00:17:07.519 would never happen no oh gosh no yeah wow and 00:17:07.519 --> 00:17:09.240 then so you're still living with your family 00:17:09.240 --> 00:17:12.750 or obviously you said they like fell in love 00:17:12.750 --> 00:17:16.490 when she was born um how did they support you 00:17:16.490 --> 00:17:19.369 while she was like but while you were finishing 00:17:19.369 --> 00:17:22.589 high school your young mom uh it was interesting 00:17:22.589 --> 00:17:27.109 because i was like bound and determined to figure 00:17:27.109 --> 00:17:29.269 this out by myself so i didn't ask for advice 00:17:29.269 --> 00:17:32.640 i didn't and when i was given advice it just 00:17:32.640 --> 00:17:35.160 pissed me off like it made me angry it's like 00:17:35.160 --> 00:17:36.920 especially if you're in a situation where you're 00:17:36.920 --> 00:17:39.160 like I don't necessarily have a good relationship 00:17:39.160 --> 00:17:41.819 with my family then like why would I take your 00:17:41.819 --> 00:17:44.539 advice when this is our relationship yeah like 00:17:44.539 --> 00:17:47.720 when I she was a porker and I was not producing 00:17:47.720 --> 00:17:50.519 enough milk and so I I'm like this is silly I'm 00:17:50.519 --> 00:17:53.099 nursing and then still having to give her a bottle 00:17:53.099 --> 00:17:55.240 I'm like okay we're just we're done we're just 00:17:55.240 --> 00:17:57.920 gonna do bottles and oh the guilt trip that I 00:17:57.920 --> 00:18:01.579 got for that that I I'm just a terrible mom because 00:18:01.579 --> 00:18:04.000 I'm not breastfeeding. And I'm like, well, she'll 00:18:04.000 --> 00:18:05.900 starve to death if you would like me to do that 00:18:05.900 --> 00:18:07.640 because that's the option. That's the other option 00:18:07.640 --> 00:18:11.200 here. Wow. So it was things like that, that type 00:18:11.200 --> 00:18:14.000 of tension where it just, you know, and also 00:18:14.000 --> 00:18:16.519 trying to plan a wedding, which was super awkward 00:18:16.519 --> 00:18:20.160 in the same scenario of all of that, trying to 00:18:20.160 --> 00:18:23.200 finish school, you know, have a baby, trying 00:18:23.200 --> 00:18:25.720 to plan a wedding. Yeah, all of those things 00:18:25.720 --> 00:18:28.160 are stressful in and of themselves without being 00:18:28.160 --> 00:18:31.720 stacked on top of each other and in an unsupportive 00:18:31.720 --> 00:18:34.720 environment. Yeah. Yeah. Did Sean get to see 00:18:34.720 --> 00:18:36.839 her a lot in those, like, few months between 00:18:36.839 --> 00:18:40.319 when she was born and when you moved? He was 00:18:40.319 --> 00:18:43.299 there when she was born, and then I – nope, that 00:18:43.299 --> 00:18:45.440 was before she was born. There was, like, a few. 00:18:45.500 --> 00:18:49.660 It wasn't a lot. Yeah. And so she was – so February, 00:18:49.940 --> 00:18:54.480 March, April. She was, like, three. three months 00:18:54.480 --> 00:18:56.700 old when we got married. So he kind of missed 00:18:56.700 --> 00:18:59.700 a lot of that first little chunk. Yeah. Was that 00:18:59.700 --> 00:19:03.059 extremely hard on him? Yeah. When she was born, 00:19:03.099 --> 00:19:07.099 he would not let her out of his sight. Like he 00:19:07.099 --> 00:19:10.720 walked her in, held her to get her first bath 00:19:10.720 --> 00:19:13.920 and like everything. And we were in the room 00:19:13.920 --> 00:19:17.819 and she was in the nursery and he's like, can 00:19:17.819 --> 00:19:23.739 I go see the baby? And the nurse was like, yours 00:19:23.739 --> 00:19:26.299 you can go get her she can be in here if you 00:19:26.299 --> 00:19:28.740 want her to be in here and he was like yeah and 00:19:28.740 --> 00:19:31.119 so it's like then it was like once he was like 00:19:31.119 --> 00:19:33.220 oh yeah you're right but then it's also because 00:19:33.220 --> 00:19:35.920 you're 17 so you're used to like asking permission 00:19:35.920 --> 00:19:38.700 permission to go to the bathroom at school so 00:19:38.700 --> 00:19:40.200 then all of a sudden you're responsible for this 00:19:40.200 --> 00:19:43.799 human and you don't have to ask permission like 00:19:43.799 --> 00:19:46.440 you're just you're treated like an adult because 00:19:47.279 --> 00:19:48.920 You're essentially an adult in this. You are 00:19:48.920 --> 00:19:50.359 an adult in this situation, whether you want 00:19:50.359 --> 00:19:54.000 to be or not. What was like the, obviously with 00:19:54.000 --> 00:19:57.339 newborn, sleep deprivation is a real thing. So 00:19:57.339 --> 00:20:01.519 you're doing the nights on your own. What was 00:20:01.519 --> 00:20:04.339 that like? And then also, you know, doing school. 00:20:04.980 --> 00:20:08.319 Honestly, I think it was just, I was in survival 00:20:08.319 --> 00:20:11.220 mode. Like, it's like, we just got to do this. 00:20:11.240 --> 00:20:13.319 You know, it kind of was the theme of the whole 00:20:13.319 --> 00:20:16.759 thing. Like, there wasn't an alternative. I don't 00:20:16.759 --> 00:20:20.480 have another option other than, one, she was 00:20:20.480 --> 00:20:23.240 a really, really good baby and a good sleeper, 00:20:23.240 --> 00:20:27.099 which thank you, Jesus, because that helped huge. 00:20:28.160 --> 00:20:31.900 But it was just a balance. It had to work. So 00:20:31.900 --> 00:20:33.240 it was one of those where it's like, all right, 00:20:33.240 --> 00:20:34.519 we're just going to figure this out. This has 00:20:34.519 --> 00:20:37.420 to work. I think it's funny because so we both. 00:20:37.799 --> 00:20:40.500 work from home with our kids and I I don't know 00:20:40.500 --> 00:20:41.920 about you but people ask me all the time like 00:20:41.920 --> 00:20:44.259 how do you make it work like it's just like that's 00:20:44.259 --> 00:20:47.019 all of parenthood is you're just like well You 00:20:47.019 --> 00:20:49.480 figure it out. I don't know. Like, yeah, you 00:20:49.480 --> 00:20:52.240 just do like with everything and you survive. 00:20:52.519 --> 00:20:56.099 Like, yeah, I don't know what to tell you. That's 00:20:56.099 --> 00:20:59.059 just all we do is we figure it out. And, and 00:20:59.059 --> 00:21:00.839 then somehow you're like, how did we do that? 00:21:00.920 --> 00:21:03.920 Yeah, no, we were literally talking on Instagram 00:21:03.920 --> 00:21:08.400 about, it was something about like how, you know, 00:21:08.400 --> 00:21:11.359 life before kids, like what did, what did we 00:21:11.359 --> 00:21:14.480 do with our free time? I don't even, I don't 00:21:14.480 --> 00:21:17.230 even know. Like, I would just lay there and like 00:21:17.230 --> 00:21:20.630 scroll for hours. I'm like, I actually feel more 00:21:20.630 --> 00:21:24.230 productive now with kids than maybe pre -kids. 00:21:24.470 --> 00:21:27.289 I don't know. At least some days I do because 00:21:27.289 --> 00:21:30.430 I just am like, I got to get my stuff done. Like 00:21:30.430 --> 00:21:34.210 I got no time other than now. So just do it. 00:21:34.329 --> 00:21:39.609 Yeah. What was the best part about being a teen 00:21:39.609 --> 00:21:42.869 mom? I would say like our lives now. Like she's 00:21:42.869 --> 00:21:46.109 my best friend. That's so sweet. I mean, we just 00:21:46.109 --> 00:21:49.089 have so much fun together. It's been a little 00:21:49.089 --> 00:21:51.369 bit backwards for Sean and I, obviously, because 00:21:51.369 --> 00:21:54.089 we didn't know life without a kid. Yeah. And 00:21:54.089 --> 00:21:56.109 so it's like now that she's moved out and is 00:21:56.109 --> 00:21:59.309 on her own, we're like, oh. Like figuring it 00:21:59.309 --> 00:22:01.089 out. Like getting to know each other. Totally. 00:22:01.289 --> 00:22:03.230 We bought a camper. We go camping like all the 00:22:03.230 --> 00:22:05.529 time. Yeah. I feel like anytime I see you doing 00:22:05.529 --> 00:22:07.250 anything, you're like, we're camping. Going camping. 00:22:07.809 --> 00:22:10.609 Yes. So I think that's been like the coolest 00:22:10.609 --> 00:22:14.480 thing is because we are. so close in age like 00:22:14.480 --> 00:22:18.039 we just yeah we have such a super tight relationship 00:22:18.039 --> 00:22:20.279 that's really and I know that's not always the 00:22:20.279 --> 00:22:24.420 case but for us it's a huge blessing yeah did 00:22:24.420 --> 00:22:26.859 you feel like you missed out on a lot of things 00:22:26.859 --> 00:22:30.119 like so you got to do a lot of high school things 00:22:30.119 --> 00:22:33.839 but then like going into young adulthood where 00:22:33.839 --> 00:22:36.380 like people are going to college and partying 00:22:36.380 --> 00:22:39.299 in college and just like doing those things that 00:22:39.850 --> 00:22:43.029 you can't really do if you're a mom. Right. Do 00:22:43.029 --> 00:22:44.589 you feel like you missed out on any of that? 00:22:44.630 --> 00:22:46.210 Or, like, in the moment, did you feel like you 00:22:46.210 --> 00:22:47.650 were missing out? Yeah, I was going to say, in 00:22:47.650 --> 00:22:49.329 the moment, I didn't. Because I didn't know any 00:22:49.329 --> 00:22:52.650 different. But, like, looking back, people will 00:22:52.650 --> 00:22:54.829 be like, oh, they'll, like, bring up a scenario. 00:22:54.869 --> 00:22:56.670 And I was like, yeah, I had a three -year -old. 00:22:56.869 --> 00:22:59.210 Yeah. You know? Like, when they're doing normal, 00:22:59.410 --> 00:23:02.170 you know, 20 -year -old things or 19 -year -old 00:23:02.170 --> 00:23:04.170 things, I was like, yeah, I had a three -year 00:23:04.170 --> 00:23:07.210 -old. I got nothing. Yeah. So I don't think I 00:23:07.210 --> 00:23:10.220 realized. That I had missed out on a lot until 00:23:10.220 --> 00:23:13.099 like later in life where I was like, oh. That 00:23:13.099 --> 00:23:15.220 was your experience. Yeah. It's not the same. 00:23:15.380 --> 00:23:18.119 Yeah. Do you feel like it was like a, oh man, 00:23:18.200 --> 00:23:22.500 I'm sad I missed that? I don't think I ever felt 00:23:22.500 --> 00:23:27.339 like a sadness or like, dang, I missed out because 00:23:27.339 --> 00:23:32.220 I just adore this kid so much. You know, like 00:23:32.220 --> 00:23:36.779 I wouldn't change anything. Yeah. At all. Yeah. 00:23:36.920 --> 00:23:40.150 So. Did you and Sean ever talk about having more 00:23:40.150 --> 00:23:44.329 kids? For like 3 .2 seconds. Really? It was funny. 00:23:44.930 --> 00:23:48.089 Britt was about five and my sister -in -law was 00:23:48.089 --> 00:23:51.369 pregnant. And we're like, okay, if we're going 00:23:51.369 --> 00:23:52.890 to do it, like this would make sense. She would 00:23:52.890 --> 00:23:54.990 have a cousin. Yeah. You know, because she was 00:23:54.990 --> 00:23:58.009 the first grandchild on my husband, on Sean's 00:23:58.009 --> 00:23:59.890 side. And so it was like, okay, if we're going 00:23:59.890 --> 00:24:02.089 to do this, this would be the opportune time. 00:24:02.190 --> 00:24:04.430 So it's like we sat down with Britt. We're like, 00:24:04.509 --> 00:24:06.410 what do you think? And she was like, I mean. 00:24:06.960 --> 00:24:08.660 absolutely no, there was nothing in her that 00:24:08.660 --> 00:24:11.559 wanted a sibling. She was like, no. And I was 00:24:11.559 --> 00:24:12.980 like, okay, well, we're going to pray about it. 00:24:13.000 --> 00:24:15.000 We'll see, you know, kind of. And then in the 00:24:15.000 --> 00:24:16.680 morning I was like, there's nothing in me that 00:24:16.680 --> 00:24:18.940 wants to have another child. That's great. That's 00:24:18.940 --> 00:24:21.640 crazy. Just to like be so certain. So yeah. And 00:24:21.640 --> 00:24:24.099 I don't know if it was like, that was just that 00:24:24.099 --> 00:24:26.279 God's provision, like trying to protect me that 00:24:26.279 --> 00:24:28.319 maybe it would not have gone well if I tried 00:24:28.319 --> 00:24:31.859 to have it. I have no idea. I can hypotheticalize 00:24:31.859 --> 00:24:34.440 the whole thing, tell you in the face, but. There 00:24:34.440 --> 00:24:40.279 was zero. Yeah, yeah. I love that because, I 00:24:40.279 --> 00:24:42.220 mean, there's so many things in life that you're 00:24:42.220 --> 00:24:44.740 like, should I go this way or should I go that 00:24:44.740 --> 00:24:47.950 way? But, like, having that. literally so clear. 00:24:48.089 --> 00:24:50.250 I think the big piece that I would have loved 00:24:50.250 --> 00:24:53.470 to experience, the thing that I do look back 00:24:53.470 --> 00:24:55.230 and go, oh, I wish I could have experienced this, 00:24:55.329 --> 00:24:58.170 was Sean and I being together and pregnant and 00:24:58.170 --> 00:25:00.849 having a baby, if that makes sense. I feel like 00:25:00.849 --> 00:25:03.609 he missed out. So it was like, that was a big 00:25:03.609 --> 00:25:05.750 piece that I was like, well, I would love for 00:25:05.750 --> 00:25:09.829 us to have had this together, but that didn't. 00:25:10.269 --> 00:25:13.529 win. That's fair. What did it look like? Like, 00:25:13.569 --> 00:25:16.309 were you working as a young mom or was Sean like 00:25:16.309 --> 00:25:18.970 the breadwinner and you were staying home? I 00:25:18.970 --> 00:25:22.970 started working. She was pretty young. Gosh, 00:25:23.069 --> 00:25:25.609 not even a year. So it was pretty early that 00:25:25.609 --> 00:25:29.049 I went back to work and just had, um, like she 00:25:29.049 --> 00:25:31.430 has two, she had two great grandmas that would 00:25:31.430 --> 00:25:34.069 watch her. Um, All the time. I mean, that's one 00:25:34.069 --> 00:25:36.150 nice thing about being a young parent is you're 00:25:36.150 --> 00:25:37.930 like, great -grandparents are still alive and 00:25:37.930 --> 00:25:41.130 still active. Yeah. So great -grandmas watched 00:25:41.130 --> 00:25:44.150 her a ton, which was a huge blessing. So super. 00:25:44.170 --> 00:25:46.750 And she is an old soul, I think, because of it. 00:25:46.829 --> 00:25:48.750 Like, she literally is a little old lady inside. 00:25:49.829 --> 00:25:54.009 Loves doilies and... Has hairless cats. And has 00:25:54.009 --> 00:25:55.849 hairless... She's the crazy cat lady, but, you 00:25:55.849 --> 00:25:59.440 know, edgy with hairless cats. I love it so much. 00:25:59.980 --> 00:26:03.180 So what is something you wish you had known like 00:26:03.180 --> 00:26:07.119 before this all happened or when you were like 00:26:07.119 --> 00:26:11.359 in the weeds of getting through a pregnancy at 00:26:11.359 --> 00:26:15.559 16 and being just like a super young mom? I don't 00:26:15.559 --> 00:26:19.380 know that anything for me per se, but I think 00:26:19.380 --> 00:26:23.339 like as like a parent that might be going through 00:26:23.339 --> 00:26:27.049 it with their kid, you know, like. just love 00:26:27.049 --> 00:26:30.089 them, like support them. And they're feeling 00:26:30.089 --> 00:26:33.450 like I felt enough shame and all, I didn't need 00:26:33.450 --> 00:26:35.930 anything else heaped on me. Most of the time 00:26:35.930 --> 00:26:38.809 when we do something like we're not supposed 00:26:38.809 --> 00:26:41.809 to, we don't need anyone. I didn't need more. 00:26:41.990 --> 00:26:46.349 And so the, between, you know, family and then 00:26:46.349 --> 00:26:49.029 the religion was just even worse. It was horrible. 00:26:49.309 --> 00:26:51.650 The shame and the way that they treated me was 00:26:51.650 --> 00:26:55.759 just absolutely terrible. I was like, just. I 00:26:55.759 --> 00:27:00.099 would say just love them. They know what they 00:27:00.099 --> 00:27:04.259 did. Just love them. Do you have a relationship 00:27:04.259 --> 00:27:06.660 with your family at all? Was it like you moved 00:27:06.660 --> 00:27:09.440 in? Peace out, never spoke to them again, or? 00:27:09.799 --> 00:27:13.440 No, I tried. I tried for a long time. I even 00:27:13.440 --> 00:27:15.839 would send Brett out in the summer to spend time 00:27:15.839 --> 00:27:18.920 with my parents, and then my great -grandma lived 00:27:18.920 --> 00:27:21.339 on the same property and my sister, and then 00:27:21.339 --> 00:27:23.180 her godparents were across the street, so she 00:27:23.180 --> 00:27:25.779 had this little, like, compound of people. The 00:27:25.779 --> 00:27:28.099 blessings of the times that she went out there 00:27:28.099 --> 00:27:30.460 was the relationship with my grandma, her great 00:27:30.460 --> 00:27:34.380 -grandma, and her godparents. It did nothing 00:27:34.380 --> 00:27:36.400 but damage the relationship with my parents. 00:27:37.839 --> 00:27:40.779 That's a bummer. Yeah. It had the opposite effect 00:27:40.779 --> 00:27:44.079 that I had hoped. I wanted to give them a chance 00:27:44.079 --> 00:27:46.019 to be better grandparents than they were parents, 00:27:46.160 --> 00:27:49.640 and that backfired big time. Sorry. So you no 00:27:49.640 --> 00:27:51.779 longer have a relationship with them? It's minimal. 00:27:51.920 --> 00:27:56.119 The door is starting to crack back open in their 00:27:56.119 --> 00:27:59.960 elderly years. I'm now responding to text messages 00:27:59.960 --> 00:28:02.569 and things like that, but that's about it. my 00:28:02.569 --> 00:28:05.069 threshold right now yeah that makes sense yeah 00:28:05.069 --> 00:28:08.490 I mean that's a lot to go through and I feel 00:28:08.490 --> 00:28:11.849 like now as a parent not that like people people 00:28:11.849 --> 00:28:13.710 don't really have like relationship with my kids 00:28:13.710 --> 00:28:15.890 yet because they're still really young but even 00:28:15.890 --> 00:28:18.009 just like seeing them get hurt and get frustrated 00:28:18.009 --> 00:28:21.069 and like be treated poorly in any capacity like 00:28:21.069 --> 00:28:23.950 that's so much worse so I would imagine like 00:28:23.950 --> 00:28:26.930 if that's happening with if you're sending your 00:28:26.930 --> 00:28:28.809 kid to spend time with someone and you find out 00:28:28.809 --> 00:28:31.700 they're not treating them well yeah Like that's 00:28:31.700 --> 00:28:33.980 going to be so much worse than anything you ever 00:28:33.980 --> 00:28:36.579 did to me. Exactly. Oh, for sure. Absolutely. 00:28:37.000 --> 00:28:40.000 Wow. That's super tough. Going back to the religion 00:28:40.000 --> 00:28:43.960 piece. So left the Mormon faith. How did you 00:28:43.960 --> 00:28:49.299 find Jesus? Randomly on a street corner. No, 00:28:49.299 --> 00:28:52.660 I'm just kidding. It was, it literally just was 00:28:52.660 --> 00:28:57.339 his pole. Like I found this church where my sister 00:28:57.339 --> 00:29:00.640 and her husband were going and it was. Christian 00:29:00.640 --> 00:29:03.480 -based biblical teaching literally would go through 00:29:03.480 --> 00:29:06.140 chapter by chapter and verse by verse in the 00:29:06.140 --> 00:29:08.900 Bible, which was super helpful for me as I'm 00:29:08.900 --> 00:29:12.039 just trying to figure this out. And just kind 00:29:12.039 --> 00:29:14.339 of was like, okay, this... Which surprises me 00:29:14.339 --> 00:29:17.759 because going from something that was so religious 00:29:17.759 --> 00:29:21.519 -based and faith works and all of that shenanigans 00:29:21.519 --> 00:29:24.700 to like... Actually going back into technically 00:29:24.700 --> 00:29:27.200 another religion, you know what I mean, was kind 00:29:27.200 --> 00:29:29.119 of shocking. But at the same time, it's like 00:29:29.119 --> 00:29:32.299 I think that there has just been that God spirit 00:29:32.299 --> 00:29:35.359 instilled in me like since I was little. Like 00:29:35.359 --> 00:29:38.019 I hated church when I was little. I was horrible, 00:29:38.240 --> 00:29:42.019 absolutely horrible. So again, I think it was 00:29:42.019 --> 00:29:44.980 just that. And just instilled in you. Yeah, and 00:29:44.980 --> 00:29:47.660 just started really digging in and found it. 00:29:47.660 --> 00:29:50.019 It felt completely different, I think, was what 00:29:50.019 --> 00:29:53.660 was so appealing. And then I got baptized probably, 00:29:53.799 --> 00:29:58.079 gosh, maybe a year later after I started going 00:29:58.079 --> 00:30:00.380 to church and stuff. Yeah, you're probably walking 00:30:00.380 --> 00:30:03.640 into the church a little bit hesitant, I'm sure. 00:30:03.980 --> 00:30:06.519 Yeah, how was the church's response to your... 00:30:07.470 --> 00:30:12.369 Not good. So they have what they call young men 00:30:12.369 --> 00:30:15.670 and young women's group, but you're separated 00:30:15.670 --> 00:30:18.869 boys and girls. And once they found out I was 00:30:18.869 --> 00:30:24.089 pregnant, then I was then called to the nursery. 00:30:24.190 --> 00:30:27.049 And so I was no longer allowed to be with my 00:30:27.049 --> 00:30:29.970 peers. I had to work in the nursery. Really? 00:30:30.569 --> 00:30:33.089 Wow. It was like the big old scarlet letter is 00:30:33.089 --> 00:30:36.380 what it felt like. and just couldn't be, they, 00:30:36.460 --> 00:30:38.160 I was the bad influence. I couldn't be around 00:30:38.160 --> 00:30:41.220 my peers. And was that kind of like the, the 00:30:41.220 --> 00:30:43.539 straw that broke the camel's back? Is that how 00:30:43.539 --> 00:30:47.160 you say? Um, I had kind of walked away from it 00:30:47.160 --> 00:30:51.259 before, but that was like, yeah. Yeah. I was 00:30:51.259 --> 00:30:53.140 like, I will have nothing to do with this ever 00:30:53.140 --> 00:30:54.779 again. There's the base shame that you feel. 00:30:54.839 --> 00:30:57.039 And then mom and dad are adding onto that. And 00:30:57.039 --> 00:30:58.579 then all of a sudden you have this like communal, 00:30:58.700 --> 00:31:03.140 like going in public is shameful almost. Right. 00:31:03.259 --> 00:31:08.099 Yeah. Wow. For sure. Yeah. I cannot even imagine 00:31:08.099 --> 00:31:11.519 that. I feel like shame is such a thing that 00:31:11.519 --> 00:31:13.839 like, obviously God doesn't want us to feel shame. 00:31:13.859 --> 00:31:17.480 Right. And then, yeah, when it's just so blatantly 00:31:17.480 --> 00:31:20.960 like right in front of you, it's like, how can 00:31:20.960 --> 00:31:23.559 you not feel it? Of course. Yeah. When did you 00:31:23.559 --> 00:31:25.859 stop attending the Mormon church then? Once I 00:31:25.859 --> 00:31:28.660 moved out. Okay. Yeah. So did mom and dad like 00:31:28.660 --> 00:31:31.599 require that you go while you were still in the 00:31:31.599 --> 00:31:34.250 house? So yeah, once I left the house. The only 00:31:34.250 --> 00:31:38.930 time I ever have gone back was for my nephews 00:31:38.930 --> 00:31:41.430 both went on missions. And so I went to their 00:31:41.430 --> 00:31:44.569 homecomings where they spoke at church and then 00:31:44.569 --> 00:31:49.309 for funerals. But it's not a good relationship 00:31:49.309 --> 00:31:50.849 with mom and dad, but it sounds like you do have 00:31:50.849 --> 00:31:52.309 good relationship with your siblings. Is that 00:31:52.309 --> 00:31:54.269 all of your siblings, just certain ones? No, 00:31:54.309 --> 00:31:56.349 all of them. All of us are pretty. How are your 00:31:56.349 --> 00:31:58.410 siblings? How many siblings do you have? I have, 00:31:58.490 --> 00:32:00.769 there's four of us. Okay. Yeah. So I have two 00:32:00.769 --> 00:32:03.049 older sisters and an older brother. I'm the youngest. 00:32:03.559 --> 00:32:06.779 And what were their responses to the whole situation? 00:32:07.140 --> 00:32:09.640 They were great. My brother, I can't remember 00:32:09.640 --> 00:32:12.420 if he was still on his mission. I think he was 00:32:12.420 --> 00:32:15.000 back and married, but not living in the state. 00:32:16.079 --> 00:32:20.279 My oldest sister was like, okay, whatever you 00:32:20.279 --> 00:32:22.259 need. Like she helped pack my room. My middle 00:32:22.259 --> 00:32:26.579 sister like literally took Britt as like hers, 00:32:26.680 --> 00:32:29.400 like in the most like loving way. She even, because 00:32:29.400 --> 00:32:33.009 she had two boys. And she has five kids. All 00:32:33.009 --> 00:32:35.750 of her kids are two years apart. And Britt just 00:32:35.750 --> 00:32:39.470 fits in one of the weird gaps. And she's like, 00:32:39.549 --> 00:32:41.690 that was my first girl because she had all boys 00:32:41.690 --> 00:32:45.230 until her youngest. And she was phenomenal and 00:32:45.230 --> 00:32:48.049 would also help watch her and love her. And she 00:32:48.049 --> 00:32:50.670 just treated her like her own. And then she moved 00:32:50.670 --> 00:32:52.849 out of state. She moved to Idaho to be closer 00:32:52.849 --> 00:32:56.150 to my parents when Britt was pretty young. Yeah, 00:32:56.150 --> 00:33:00.190 she was like maybe two. What would you say you 00:33:00.190 --> 00:33:02.730 would tell somebody who's maybe going through 00:33:02.730 --> 00:33:07.089 either teen pregnancy or they're a young mom? 00:33:07.230 --> 00:33:10.650 Is there anything that you would advise them 00:33:10.650 --> 00:33:14.960 of or anything that you would want to say? I, 00:33:15.039 --> 00:33:18.420 I, for me, like there's so much joy on the other 00:33:18.420 --> 00:33:22.839 side, like so much as hard as it is in the thick 00:33:22.839 --> 00:33:25.359 of it in the day to day. It's hard. It's not, 00:33:25.359 --> 00:33:28.980 it's not easy being a parent at any age I think 00:33:28.980 --> 00:33:31.460 is hard. Like I don't, it doesn't matter, but 00:33:31.460 --> 00:33:33.180 I feel like when you have so many cards stacked 00:33:33.180 --> 00:33:36.839 against you from the beginning, but it's so worth 00:33:36.839 --> 00:33:40.099 it. Like just push, just, you know, find some 00:33:40.099 --> 00:33:43.630 support. The people that you can trust around 00:33:43.630 --> 00:33:47.369 you, I think, is key. Just having something around 00:33:47.369 --> 00:33:50.130 you that you feel like you can lean on, whether 00:33:50.130 --> 00:33:53.230 that's faith or people or just something to not 00:33:53.230 --> 00:33:55.910 feel like you're alone. You answered this a little 00:33:55.910 --> 00:33:58.369 bit, but what would you say to the support system 00:33:58.369 --> 00:34:02.609 of a young mom or a teen mom? What would I say 00:34:02.609 --> 00:34:06.029 to them, to the support system? How can they 00:34:06.029 --> 00:34:11.659 support better or best in your experience? strange 00:34:11.659 --> 00:34:14.280 as it sounds is just treat them normal. Like 00:34:14.280 --> 00:34:16.860 don't treat them like they're a teen mom. Like 00:34:16.860 --> 00:34:20.079 they're a mom. Yeah. They're still a mom and 00:34:20.079 --> 00:34:21.559 they still have to figure out all the mom stuff. 00:34:22.079 --> 00:34:24.480 Um, so if they come to you and they need support, 00:34:24.639 --> 00:34:27.380 like just be there for them as a friend, as a 00:34:27.380 --> 00:34:29.960 fellow mom or whatever kind of that relationship 00:34:29.960 --> 00:34:35.099 is. I think that constant like reminder that 00:34:35.099 --> 00:34:37.780 they're a teen mom doesn't really help, you know? 00:34:38.119 --> 00:34:39.539 Again, they already know that. They know that. 00:34:39.599 --> 00:34:42.260 Clearly. No reminder necessary there. There's 00:34:42.260 --> 00:34:45.960 enough eyes. There's enough, yeah, enough outside 00:34:45.960 --> 00:34:50.119 shame or whatever. What would you say to a mom 00:34:50.119 --> 00:34:53.880 who maybe is experiencing religious shame, again, 00:34:53.940 --> 00:34:55.940 whether it's because she's a young mom, a single 00:34:55.940 --> 00:34:59.719 mom, something, just religious shame for however 00:34:59.719 --> 00:35:04.059 her situation is? Yeah, I think the biggest piece 00:35:04.059 --> 00:35:07.719 and reminder of... Like carrying that is, it's 00:35:07.719 --> 00:35:11.840 not yours to carry. Like that shame is not how 00:35:11.840 --> 00:35:13.900 our God wants us to feel. And that's not coming 00:35:13.900 --> 00:35:16.179 from him. That's coming from something else. 00:35:17.099 --> 00:35:20.360 And so just focusing on the joy that is that 00:35:20.360 --> 00:35:23.840 child that you have, man, that, that can take 00:35:23.840 --> 00:35:26.880 it all away. If you just look at the joy of this 00:35:26.880 --> 00:35:29.820 little, little munchkin that you, that you have 00:35:29.820 --> 00:35:32.699 that, who knows, maybe this was a special gift 00:35:32.699 --> 00:35:36.000 that you could not have had later. Like who knows 00:35:36.000 --> 00:35:38.639 the whole bigger picture? Like only God knows 00:35:38.639 --> 00:35:42.260 that. But I think just like, just pushing that 00:35:42.260 --> 00:35:46.079 aside, focusing on what you have and the fact 00:35:46.079 --> 00:35:49.380 that you're a mom. You are just, not just, but 00:35:49.380 --> 00:35:50.780 you're a mom. You're not a teen mom. You're a 00:35:50.780 --> 00:35:53.980 mom. And trying to like break some of that stigma 00:35:53.980 --> 00:35:56.360 that comes along with it. Do you feel like that 00:35:56.360 --> 00:35:59.280 joy like kicked in for you right away whenever 00:35:59.280 --> 00:36:01.679 you held Brit for the first time? Oh yeah. Yeah. 00:36:01.739 --> 00:36:04.440 Yeah. She was just, she had these big giant brown 00:36:04.440 --> 00:36:07.360 eyes and red hair that just stuck up. Like she 00:36:07.360 --> 00:36:09.960 was born with bright red hair. And she looked 00:36:09.960 --> 00:36:11.800 like a little baby orangutan, like in the cutest 00:36:11.800 --> 00:36:15.820 way ever. That is amazing. I'm going to have 00:36:15.820 --> 00:36:18.800 to see a picture of her as a baby. But was just, 00:36:18.980 --> 00:36:21.059 yeah. And she just, there was something special 00:36:21.059 --> 00:36:24.800 about her from day one. Yeah. Yeah. Just an amazing 00:36:24.800 --> 00:36:27.599 human. Yeah. She was meant for you. Yep. Yeah. 00:36:28.030 --> 00:36:30.630 That's amazing. Well, thank you for sharing your 00:36:30.630 --> 00:36:35.630 story. And I hope, yeah, I hope a few young moms 00:36:35.630 --> 00:36:38.710 will listen to this and be encouraged by your 00:36:38.710 --> 00:36:39.630 story. Is there anything else you want to share 00:36:39.630 --> 00:36:43.190 before we wrap up? I would just like kind of 00:36:43.190 --> 00:36:45.989 continuing on that, like the hope piece, like 00:36:45.989 --> 00:36:49.449 being a mom young, like you still have so many 00:36:49.449 --> 00:36:53.849 years after. Like Britt moved out, gosh, I don't 00:36:53.849 --> 00:36:56.449 even think I was 40 yet. you know and it was 00:36:56.449 --> 00:36:59.469 like guys i've got so many more years to just 00:36:59.469 --> 00:37:02.349 have fun yeah and not only like with my husband 00:37:02.349 --> 00:37:06.590 but like with her like we have so much fun together 00:37:06.590 --> 00:37:10.170 the two of us yeah and so i think that could 00:37:10.170 --> 00:37:12.289 be something to hold on to like when when it 00:37:12.289 --> 00:37:15.750 is hard like man it gets so good yeah so good 00:37:16.570 --> 00:37:19.809 Is there any, like, do you look back on Brit's 00:37:19.809 --> 00:37:21.809 childhood and really miss it? Like, do you wish 00:37:21.809 --> 00:37:24.510 you could go back to some of those days? Or are 00:37:24.510 --> 00:37:28.570 you just like, you know, we're living in the 00:37:28.570 --> 00:37:31.510 good old days right now. Yeah, I think like life 00:37:31.510 --> 00:37:34.409 is just really good. Like she's really good and 00:37:34.409 --> 00:37:37.170 Sean and I are really good. So it's like, man, 00:37:37.329 --> 00:37:39.409 like we just love where we're at now for sure. 00:37:39.630 --> 00:37:43.139 I love that. That's great. Well, thank you so 00:37:43.139 --> 00:37:45.900 much for sharing your story. It's super encouraging. 00:37:46.019 --> 00:37:49.539 And yeah, it just shows like you can come from 00:37:49.539 --> 00:37:53.820 hardship and walk out the other side and just 00:37:53.820 --> 00:37:57.159 live in this joy. And you have such a beautiful 00:37:57.159 --> 00:38:00.139 family. So appreciate you sharing your story 00:38:00.139 --> 00:38:02.820 today. Thank you so much. Yeah. Well, we like 00:38:02.820 --> 00:38:07.139 to kind of close our podcast with our wins of 00:38:07.139 --> 00:38:10.440 the week. This could be from this week or it 00:38:10.440 --> 00:38:13.469 could be, you know, from. from a long time ago, 00:38:13.510 --> 00:38:16.010 too. But Erica, do you have a win you want to 00:38:16.010 --> 00:38:18.849 share? So Lloyd loves looking at pictures, and 00:38:18.849 --> 00:38:21.530 he requests to look at pictures on our phones, 00:38:21.610 --> 00:38:24.150 and we try to avoid just giving him our phone 00:38:24.150 --> 00:38:26.769 to look at pictures. So I pulled out our wedding 00:38:26.769 --> 00:38:29.469 album recently, and it's just his favorite thing. 00:38:29.530 --> 00:38:31.210 He just flips through the pictures, and they're 00:38:31.210 --> 00:38:35.969 like, Papa, Op -Op, G -Ma, Mom, Dad, Auntie Carl, 00:38:36.230 --> 00:38:38.269 Aunt Caitlin. And he just points out all the 00:38:38.269 --> 00:38:40.090 people he knows, and he just flips through, and 00:38:40.090 --> 00:38:43.659 it's... just the sweetest thing. And he absolutely 00:38:43.659 --> 00:38:45.579 loves it. And so I'm like, maybe I just need 00:38:45.579 --> 00:38:48.519 to start getting photo out. Like, yeah, just 00:38:48.519 --> 00:38:50.980 like printing, actually printing photos and just 00:38:50.980 --> 00:38:54.079 so many times that's gone through my head. Cause 00:38:54.079 --> 00:38:57.840 he loves it. Like if he asked for pictures on 00:38:57.840 --> 00:38:59.719 my phone and I just hand him the album or the 00:38:59.719 --> 00:39:00.980 other day he brought it to me, he's like, read 00:39:00.980 --> 00:39:04.440 it. There's no words to read, but we can tell 00:39:04.440 --> 00:39:11.800 you about it. I love that. Okay, my win, it actually 00:39:11.800 --> 00:39:16.019 was this morning. So I was at home. Michael was 00:39:16.019 --> 00:39:19.719 golfing. And so I was just with the kids. And 00:39:19.719 --> 00:39:23.199 there was a moment where I ran upstairs and I 00:39:23.199 --> 00:39:25.199 think I was like, I don't know, I had to go to 00:39:25.199 --> 00:39:27.539 the bathroom or something. And then walked back 00:39:27.539 --> 00:39:30.760 downstairs and Cruz was in the living room and 00:39:30.760 --> 00:39:33.099 Colt was in the kitchen, like playing in the 00:39:33.099 --> 00:39:37.380 sink. I can like sit on the stairs right there 00:39:37.380 --> 00:39:39.460 and like see it in both rooms. So I just sat 00:39:39.460 --> 00:39:42.699 there and I just like watched them for a minute. 00:39:42.920 --> 00:39:45.820 And I just like it literally brought tears to 00:39:45.820 --> 00:39:49.059 my eyes because I was like, I'm literally living 00:39:49.059 --> 00:39:52.460 what I've always dreamed of as Cruz is crying. 00:39:54.039 --> 00:39:58.199 But literally what I'm like, I am in what I've 00:39:58.199 --> 00:40:01.039 always prayed for right now. And I'm just here. 00:40:01.099 --> 00:40:04.920 I'm watching my kids just like. live their lives 00:40:04.920 --> 00:40:08.480 and I get to just observe that and that is like 00:40:08.480 --> 00:40:11.739 I just was like I literally said out loud I was 00:40:11.739 --> 00:40:15.039 like thank you Jesus because this is just it's 00:40:15.039 --> 00:40:17.800 so beautiful and I'm like I love this so much 00:40:17.800 --> 00:40:21.579 and yeah I have hard days and Obviously, Cruz 00:40:21.579 --> 00:40:24.579 has hard days. He's just saying the same thing. 00:40:24.699 --> 00:40:28.300 Yeah. He's like, I love you, Mom. But it just, 00:40:28.480 --> 00:40:31.860 yeah, I'm just so blessed. And it just was like 00:40:31.860 --> 00:40:35.360 a moment of realizing that. So, yeah. Yeah. What 00:40:35.360 --> 00:40:37.739 about you, Linnea? I would say it was part of 00:40:37.739 --> 00:40:40.780 my trip that I was just in. We went and saw one 00:40:40.780 --> 00:40:43.599 of our favorite movies is The Princess Bride. 00:40:43.940 --> 00:40:46.300 Classic. And they were showing it at the Hollywood 00:40:46.300 --> 00:40:49.079 Cemetery. I know that sounds super weird, but 00:40:49.079 --> 00:40:50.920 it was so cool. We're not like sitting there 00:40:50.920 --> 00:40:52.719 leading at headstones or anything. It was like 00:40:52.719 --> 00:40:55.019 in a park area. Okay. And we were sitting there 00:40:55.019 --> 00:40:58.300 and she looks over at me and she's like, I miss 00:40:58.300 --> 00:41:00.940 Chris, which is her boyfriend. She's like, but 00:41:00.940 --> 00:41:05.159 mama, I needed this. That's so sweet. Yeah. That 00:41:05.159 --> 00:41:07.000 is really sweet. And that's such a testament 00:41:07.000 --> 00:41:09.400 of like how great of a mom you are too. That's 00:41:09.400 --> 00:41:11.019 like, I mean, cause we haven't had one on one 00:41:11.019 --> 00:41:13.679 time. It's been gosh, quite a few. I mean, it's 00:41:13.679 --> 00:41:15.300 been a couple of years cause we used to go like 00:41:15.300 --> 00:41:17.480 backpacking and camping and all sorts of stuff. 00:41:17.679 --> 00:41:21.019 But since she moved to LA, that's made it harder. 00:41:21.159 --> 00:41:23.659 So it was, yeah. So it was neat to just realize 00:41:23.659 --> 00:41:25.579 that we both really needed that, which was super 00:41:25.579 --> 00:41:27.480 special. That was super special. It was really 00:41:27.480 --> 00:41:31.440 special. Well, thank you so much for coming onto 00:41:31.440 --> 00:41:34.150 our podcast and, Yeah, we just really appreciate 00:41:34.150 --> 00:41:38.190 you and your story. But, yeah, thanks for listening, 00:41:38.289 --> 00:41:41.269 you guys. Cruz has a lot to say, obviously, to 00:41:41.269 --> 00:41:44.929 close us out. And we will see you next week. 00:41:44.949 --> 00:41:46.030 See you next week.