Welcome back to No Manual, a momcast, where we're
here to just talk about the reality of motherhood,
the good, the bad, the funny moments, the hard
moments. And in today's episode, we're going
to go through some of our motherhood pet peeves,
just the things that really get to us. And are
super frustrating. Some of them are funny. Some
of them are a little more serious. But do you
want to start with your mom moment of the week?
I would love to. Also, I want to phrase that
now that our kids are getting a little bit older,
we both have Zeta and Cruz here. You know, you
might hear some more baby noises as we go along.
They said they want to be a part of this. Yep,
they're vocalizing. who they are for sure. Okay,
so my mom moment, it actually happened, I think
it was like three days ago. So we live in Colorado
and it storms here often in the summer. So afternoon
rain is a super common thing here. And so we
just got back from a trip on Sunday and we were
in dire need of groceries. And so I put in a
Target pickup order. to to go and do drive up
so um I get the kids in the car and this was
like after nap time so it had just started raining
so that common afternoon rain I'm on my way to
Target you like in the app you put like I'm on
my way and it tells them to like get your order
ready and so I I did that and as I did that a
notification came up that said drive up is not
available right now it's like it's raining. It's
like, yeah, hazardous conditions is what it said.
And I'm like, it's literally sprinkling. It's
fine. But I was like, we're already in the car.
We're on our way to Target to pick this up. It
also said like, your order's only available today.
And I was like, I needed milk especially. And
so we, yeah, we drove to Target, parked. And
I was like, you know what? I like, we just have
to, we have to go inside to pick up the order.
And so I park, get the kids unloaded. I get Cruz
out first. I opened the trunk, and I just stuck
the car seat in the trunk, then went over to
get Colt, grabbed him, went over to get Cruz.
So I've got Cruz in one arm and Colt in the other,
and then I needed to close the trunk. So I had
Colt get down for a second. I'm like, wait right
there, buddy, and closed the trunk, and then
I lift Colt up, and as the trunk is closing,
I smacked his head. so hard on the trunk like
it sounded like i cracked his head open and poor
buddy he did not even cry at all he was just
like in shock and i was like did i just give
him a concussion because they say like well there's
no tears yeah that's when you should be worried
and he just like looked in shock like what the
heck did you just do to me mom and i was like
i'm so sorry buddy are you okay and he just goes
yes yes I'm like, okay, good buddy. So then we
go into Target, get our pickup order, go back
out. And I was, it just was like, not what I
was expecting. I was like, I felt like such a
good mom. I was like, I got my Target drive up
order ready to go. We're just going to go pick
it up, go home. And it just turned into like
more than I wanted. And it ended up being fine,
but I just felt really frazzled. And yeah, so
that's my mom moment. But what's your mom moment?
So my mom moment, we had like a date night a
couple weeks ago and we're trying to get everyone
ready. So Stuart's in the shower. I'm trying
to get ready. We're trying to get the kids ready
so we can like drop them off with grandparents
and then get to like our tickets on time and
all of that. So we got Lloyd up for a nap and
he had to go potty. So he's like sitting on the
toilet. Zeta. It's not happy if she's not being
held. So, and I'm just like trying to like put
some makeup on and be presentable. So I'm in
Lloyd's bathroom with him sitting on the toilet
and Zeta, with Zeta in my arms, just like trying
to put on mascara. And it was just one of those
moments where I was like, this is motherhood.
This is just the perfect picture. Like one kid
on the toilet pooping, the other screaming if
I don't have her. in my arms and just like trying
to do something for myself in the midst of all
of this yeah oh my gosh I feel that entirely
anytime I for makeup specifically anytime I try
to put makeup on for like two I'm like give me
two minutes like I don't need to do the full
glam yeah it's Cole is like screaming his head
off because he wants to do my makeup oh and so
yeah so then he's trying to grab the brushes
And I'm like, okay, well, here we go. So motherhood.
It's so fun. I'm like, have you seen those reels
where it's like the song is like, you're going
to miss this. And I'm like, every time there's
something that frustrates me, I'm like, I'm going
to miss this. I really am going to miss this.
Someday. I'll be thinking back on this one. Yep.
Okay. Do we want to hop into our? Yes. Do you
want to go first on this one? I would love to.
So my first one is when people tell me to sleep
when the baby sleeps. And I know we've talked
about this before, but this is just like, it's
such a, I don't know if cliche is like the right
word for it, but I just feel like this is something
that you hear all of the time. And it's just
so unrealistic, especially now. Like, we're both
back at work. Yeah. And it's really more like
the phrase of, like, when the baby sleeps, get
your emails done. That's my thing now. Get as
much done as you can while the baby sleeps. Yeah.
I think it's just, like, I don't know, a frustrating
term because it's just not realistic for everybody.
And I also feel like most of the people who say
that either don't have kids or they haven't had
a baby in, like, 30 years. Yeah. So, like, it's
different. Like, you just don't maybe remember
that you also have a million things to get done.
Or maybe you never went back to work and you
don't have that experience. Yeah. Yeah. That's
super frustrating. And I get it. Like, there's
no harm behind it. Like people are just like.
That's almost the worst though. Yeah. Is when
people have like a really good intention behind
saying something and you're like, but it's also
not helpful at all. And I'm not like one to correct
people or anything. Like if someone's like, you
know, sleep when the baby sleeps. I'm not like,
actually. Yeah. That's not. Going to be the case
for us. Yeah, like, I actually have things to
do, unfortunately. Yeah. I would love to take
a nap on both of them. I know. Maybe it's a pet
peeve to me because it's, like, what I desire.
Like, yeah, I would love. Yeah. I would love
to sleep when the baby sleeps. Can I? Sometimes.
Every once in a while. Yeah. Every once in a
while. Saturdays, usually, I get a good nap in
while both of them are asleep. Yes. Yeah. But
other than that, it's, like, weekdays, definitely
not. Like, the days I do go into the office,
like, kids. the kids are at childcare, like Cole
is, takes his nap there. So I'm like, I definitely
don't get a nap those days. Right. Yeah. So.
That's one of my top pet peeves for sure. Yeah,
I feel that one. Yeah, what about you? My first
one is when people want to hold one of my kids
and they just put their hands out and don't say
anything to me and just take them from me. And
I think the thing I realized is part of it is,
one, no one who's ever done this has been someone
who I'd say no to holding my kid. Obviously,
if a stranger did this, I'd be like, I'm sorry,
who are you? What are you doing? Please leave
me alone. But it's always someone who... I'm
like, yes, you can hold my child. Just, like,
ask, say something. Like, Stuart doesn't even
do that, you know. If he was going to take one
of the kids, he, like, says something. Yeah.
Yeah, just, like, just acknowledge the fact that
you're taking my child out of my arms. Yep. I
think it has the same energy as strangers who
touch your kid. Oh, yeah. It's, like, there's
kind of this, it's, like, I need to remind you
that kids aren't public property. Yes. So true.
They do deserve some autonomy. Where do you find,
like, that happens the most? Is it at church?
I think definitely people at church. Yeah. There's
a little bit of that vibe. Because I think with
church, I know there's a lot of strangers who
touch the kids at church. And there's this level
of, like, it's church, so it's safe. And, like,
I don't think that any of these people are, like,
terrible people. No, no, no. Like, that's not
it. But also, I don't know you. You know, I don't
even know your name and you're trying to like
hold my kid or something like that. That's always
weird. I find it interesting because like my
kids go to kids men for both services since both
Michael and I work there. And a lot of kids know
or a lot of adults know our kids and I don't
know them. And it's so interesting to me when
they like come up to me and they're like, how's
Colt doing? And I'm like, he's great. Who are
you? Who are you? I'm Laura. What's your name?
Yeah. Yeah. So I find that to be really interesting.
And they will do the same thing where they just
like try to grab the kids. And I'm like, oh,
you probably hold them in kids men. Right. But
I just, I don't know that. Right. So same, same
situation. But okay. My next one is when I shut
my eyes and one of my children wakes up and it's
like clockwork every single time. Like going
back to sleep when the baby sleeps. Well. If
I could get both babies to sleep at the same
time, maybe. But that's a rare, rare situation
right now. And for some reason, it's substantially
more frustrating for them to wake up. right when
you're falling asleep than like after you're
already asleep yes like i would rather be woken
up in the middle of the night by one of my kids
than like get comfy in bed and like close my
eyes and like that's so true be right in that
place of like getting ready to drift off and
then they wake up that's i don't know why that's
so much more frustrating than it is i swear like
every time so we don't have like a super consistent
bedtime routine with routine with Cruz yet it's
pretty much like we get Colt has a really consistent
routine and we stick with his routine but then
like Cruz hangs out with us while we watch tv
in the house he'll like sleep on the couch and
then when we're when we go to bed I'll just like
carry him up to bed with us yeah and um I swear
almost every single night like when I put him
in his bassinet and then I get comfy and turn
off like the hatch light it's like he wakes up
and then like That is way worse than being woken
up at 3 in the morning to change his diaper and
feed, and I feel that for sure. Okay, what's
your next one? My next one is just generally
maternity, nursing, and mommy and me clothes.
There's a very specific style for all three of
those categories, and that's it. There's not
a variety. Anytime I've tried to, like, look
for, like, matching outfits for the family or
something like that, it's, like, florals and
ruffles. Oh, yeah. And, like, none of us wear
those things. You're like, can you get me a graphic
tee? Yes. Thank you. I do think, because Stuart
found there's one band that has matching t -shirts,
like, adult, toddler, and onesie. Oh, nice. And
they're sold out of the toddler and onesie right
now. Oh, dang it. So I'm like. As soon as they
come back and suck, we're buying them. I was
like, maybe that's just what I need to do is
stop looking for, like, specifically mommy and
me and just, like, find stuff that's naturally
matching. I don't know. But it's just, like,
a very specific style that I feel like not most
women wear anyways. Oh, for sure. Like, I for
sure know women who wear these styles, and that's
fine. But it's not, like, the overwhelming majority.
It's not. I don't feel like I'm in the minority
here. No. I feel like I, like. Whenever I was
pregnant, especially with Colt, I almost changed
my style, I think, to match what they had because
I just didn't know what else to wear. What to
wear, yeah. I think I just ended up wearing oversized
t -shirts for the entirety of both pregnancies.
You had to. That's, yeah. Yeah, you're like,
it's either that or a crop top of my normal t
-shirt, so. Exactly. It's fine. Yeah. That's
so true, though. I feel like, like, especially
at Target, I would, like, try to shop in their
maternity section. I'm like, what are we doing
here? Yeah, I'm never going to wear any of this.
No, no. Speaking of clothes, my next one is baby
clothes that only have snaps. I'm like. Also,
what are we doing here? Like the pajamas. Yes.
They're like, it takes an hour to snap it up
and down. I'm like literally counting the snaps
as they go. I'm like, this outfit has 12 snaps
on it. Yep. I do not have time for this when
there's a blowout situation happening. Nope.
And I also don't have time for this to put it
back on you, so. Yeah, or in the middle of the
night, I want a diaper change to be as quick
and easy as possible. Yeah, definitely no snaps
in the night, for sure. I'm like. rarely i'll
put you in snaps if it's like a really cute outfit
otherwise but other than that i'm like onesies
with the three snaps in the bottom or the zip
like two -way zipper yep love it love those those
are the best options yeah i'm like what are baby
companies doing i feel like even making stuff
with snaps anymore i feel like the people designing
baby clothes have never had a baby in their life
yeah because then here i'll just jump to my next
one which is dry clean and hand wash baby clothes
yeah like i don't have time and energy or care
enough like there's no baby clothes that are
cute enough for me to dry clean and baby clothes
are cute yeah but like who's who's making this
and who's buying it yeah yeah the one brand i
can think of that like i actually really love
the clothes is kite baby they're like not hand
wash but delicates and then hang to dry is what
it is and i just i don't pull them out of the
laundry of other things i just throw them in
and it's like i have to know okay maybe it's
not going to last as long as i guess it could
have but i also don't have the time or energy
to hang this up i rarely hang my own clothes
up i have like two things that i think are worth
Also, our laundry room is literally a closet.
It's like a stacking washer dryer in a closet.
So we have zero room in our house to even hang
stuff. We don't have a backyard, so we couldn't
put up a clothesline if we wanted to. Yeah, right.
Like, we don't have anywhere to hang anything.
I, like, will hang stuff from, like, the shower.
Oh, that's smart. Yeah. So I'll, like, put it
on a hanger and then just, like, hang them in
a line if I even have the time and energy to
hang something up. Otherwise, I'm like... You
know what? It's just clothes. It's with baby
clothes. They grow out of it so fast anyways.
Yeah. That, like, why do we need this? I mean,
and I get my kids, like, outfits for holidays
and, you know, special occasions, stuff that
they're probably going to wear once anyways.
But why do we need things that are never going
to, that we can't wash? Yeah. Because it's, like,
if you take it to the dry cleaner by the time
you get it back. Oh, gosh. They're not going
to fit into it. Yeah. That's so true. I don't
think I've ever, to be honest, I don't think
I've ever stepped foot into a dry cleaner. I
don't feel like I have, but not for dry cleaning.
Really? It was like a combo. Something like that.
Yeah, to get alterations or something. Yeah,
maybe I've done that, but I don't think I've
ever brought anything to the dry cleaner myself,
which maybe that is a confession of who I am.
It's also just a lifestyle. I'm not a fancy enough
person to do dry cleaning. No, absolutely not.
Okay, my next one is when someone comments on
how tired I look. Doesn't that feel great? It
feels so great. Like, obviously I'm tired. And
I think that kind of goes along with, like, when
someone I don't know super well, like, asks me
how I am. I feel like my default is, like, I'm
good, but I'm tired. And I'm like, yeah, that's
the obvious answer for sure because I'm just
tired. But when someone's like, oh, man, you.
look so tired i'm like it's because i am yeah
i didn't sleep last night yeah i was woken up
three times yeah i am tired yes that's not a
fave of mine but it's also one of those things
like you would never like you look sick no one
wants to hear that even if it's true you know
you just like look sick yeah like there are some
things you just It's best not to comment on,
I feel like. Yeah. Yeah. It's rather just don't
say anything at all, I guess. I don't know. Can
I bring you a coffee? That is a better alternative.
That is a great option. Yes. I love that. All
right. My next one is that fast food places don't
have play places anymore. And pretty much any
place for your kids to play inside, you have
to pay for. Yeah. It's like, it's one thing to
like. Go to McDonald's and pay for lunch and
then you can play for a while. But the play places
don't exist anymore. Like I literally looked
the other day because I was thinking about this.
And we were talking about this off mic. I remember
going to McDonald's for birthday parties when
I was a kid. I've asked like four other people
and no one else has this experience. But then
I asked my mom and she was like, no, we went
to so -and -so's birthday party. I was like,
okay, this wasn't a fever day. I don't think
I ever went to a birthday party at McDonald's,
but I do remember specifically as a family going
and the whole point was to eat and then stay
there and play for a while. So I pulled up McDonald's
website and you can search like locations based
on what they have. Yeah. And within 50 miles
of our house, there's not a single one with a
play place. Really? Isn't that crazy? That is
actually ridiculous. And I was like, as a mom.
What about Chick -fil -A? So Chick -fil -A is
still good. We have a Chick -fil -A like 10 minutes
to the east of us and they have a play place.
And then I'm pretty sure we're having one built
like five minutes to the west of us. So, you
know, we have options. And I think that one will
hopefully have a play place. I mean, if they're
smart, they'll have a play place because then
they have this like. monopoly that other fast
food places have not yeah but i'm thinking like
right now it's summer and like you said it's
been a really rainy summer so there are times
when it's like you just can't go to the park
it's not even like a comfort thing it's like
no we're all just going to be drenched yeah or
if it's cold out or whatever and you just want
you need something and it's like let's go get
lunch or dinner and then play it's a contained
area so i don't have like i still have to keep
an eye on you but i don't have to like watch
you like a hawk yeah That's so true. It's so
frustrating. It's so frustrating because I'm
like, I'm trying to, I don't know if you feel
this way of like, I don't want to just do the
same things over and over with my kids. Like
Colt loves to go to the park. So yes, we go to
the park often. But like the indoor things like
that, I'm like, if I have to pay a bajillion
dollars to take him to, I don't know, the children's
museum or whatever, I'm like. i don't know i
want to do like a variety of different things
yeah and things that maybe don't cost anything
right that's part of it is like there is an indoor
play place near us that just opened it's we i
think you told me about it it's like a coffee
shop thing but i looked at it and it's pretty
expensive to get in it's like 20 bucks per kid
or something like that see that's and not yeah
i'm like but i would be fine just like paying
for a happy meal and a big mac and then then
let your kids run Yeah, that's so true. That's
a maybe just I wonder if it's like a COVID thing
that kind of just slowly. I don't know. The McDonald's
closest to us is the most depressing like 1984
thing in the world. Because so it's all like
gray, which is already like just depressing.
Yeah. And then I think technically you can order
from a person if you're like paying cash or something,
but it just has the kiosks to order. Which is,
like, okay, I don't mind that a ton, but when
that's the only option, it feels weird. So you
have almost no human interaction. And then the,
like, quote -unquote play place that they have
is just two, they're not technically iPads, but
two essentially iPads set up for kids to play.
Is this, like, just a hint of our future? I don't
like it. I don't like it either. But also, as
a mom, like, I could put my kid on an iPad at
home. Yes. Like, I can't have a play place in
my house. Yeah. That's so true. Yeah, I feel
like I'm doing my best to try to not create an
iPad kid. And then when things are like that,
I'm like, well, obviously they're going to. yeah
be exposed to it i don't know yeah i know they're
gonna be exposed to it but it's just the future
which makes me so sad because like technology
is so cool don't get me wrong like there's some
things with technology that i'm like oh that's
super cool like chat gpt i use chat gpt for a
lot of things that are very beneficial but at
the same time i'm like where is like the i don't
know the strive to like learn things now it's
like so easy to just find the answer so quickly,
which I appreciate in a sense, but I'm like trying
to find the balance with our kids. What things
are worth not worrying about and what things
are worth like actually using my brain for. I
know. And I'm like with kids, it's like, they
have so much to learn. And like now with technology,
I'm like, they can learn quote, like quotes around
that, anything they want in two seconds. Yeah.
Rather than like trying to figure out the answer,
whatever. I don't know. We're getting, I'm going
on a tangent, but it's fine. Yeah. Another pet
peeve, I guess. Technology. Yes. It's really
hard because you don't want like your kids to
not be around technology because it is useful
and it is just part of life. Yeah. But then you
don't want them to be like so absorbed in it.
For sure. Anyways, what's your next one? My next
one is when there's no changing table in a public
bathroom or if the changing table is like broken,
which is something I came across not too long
ago. I was at a restaurant in Boulder and Colt
had pooped. And so I like, obviously I needed
to change him. And I went to go change him in
the bathroom. And this changing table, it was
also the weirdest configuration of a changing
table. It was in the big like stall. which is
fine. So we went in there, but then the changing
table was above the toilet and it didn't come
down like horizontally. It came down like vertically,
if that makes sense. So it was like lengthwise
down. And then it was also like leaning like
towards the ground. And so I'm like, I like put
him up on the changing table and strapped him
in, which usually I don't like necessarily strap
my kids in. but um I you're gonna fall if it's
leaning yes and so I'm like trying to hold him
strapped in and then also change a poopy diaper
and it was to the point where like I actually
complained like I talked to that like the manager
about it because I and I'm not one of those people
that like complains often yeah but I was so frustrated
that I was like okay that is not up to code clearly
yeah so and yeah I need to be able to change
my kid and I'm not gonna do it on the floor of
the bathroom like that's gross no and so yeah
that really frustrated me and then I just feel
like I've come across a lot of public bathrooms
recently that just don't have a changing table
at all which is crazy which is crazy and I'm
like okay I guess I just I'm gonna change my
child out here on the bent like public bench
that's fine right that's the only option you're
giving me yeah and I know it's super common for
men's bathrooms not to have changing tables yes
which I know Stuart gets annoyed by. It's funny
because our church does have a tuning table in
the men's bathroom. Oh, they do. And my mom who
runs facilities has said she's had dads like
thank her. Really? Just because it's so uncommon.
It's like expected to be in the women's bathroom,
but not the men's bathroom. Yeah. Even like,
this isn't even just a like. fairness or like
both people are parents it's like what about
single dads or sure you know just situations
where mom isn't around for whatever reason she's
sick she's yeah she's decided to stay home or
whatever yeah yeah yeah oh I feel like in today's
world like that's gotta be I don't know it's
crazy yeah you just changing tables gotta be
a thing yep yeah okay what's your next one so
I'm staying on the fast food restaurants theme
any place you can get a kid's meal even like
a chipotle or noodles or something like that
yeah the drink options are almost always bottled
water a juice box or one percent milk so true
and the like we give lloyd whole milk partially
because that's the pediatrician recommendation
right and everyone knows like that's the pediatrician
recommendation yes so it's not just like a preference
if it was just a preference i would be annoyed
but whatever But like everyone gives their kids
whole milk because that's what the doctor tells
us to do. Yeah. So why is that? I mean, maybe
I shouldn't be asking fast food places to do
like the healthy option. But like if that's just
like the standard across the board of what you
should be giving your kid, it feels like that
should just be. It also feels like maybe they
would make better sales. I don't know. Yeah,
I never get the milk then. Yeah, I don't either.
I'm like, okay, this is the time you get a juice
box, I guess. I know. I'm like, the juice box
is the better choice here. I don't know. It's
so annoying. I feel like when I asked you, I'm
like, oh, do you guys have whole milk? And they're
like, no. Which, like, also, like, Dutch Bros
doesn't have whole milk, which is... Which is
crazy. Interesting. Yeah, it seems like they,
like, look at me funny when I'm like, do you
guys have whole milk? And they're like... No,
or they don't know. They're like, uh, no, it's
1%. I'm like, oh. Yeah, it's so weird. It is
weird. And, like, whole milk is my preference,
like, if I get coffee or something like that.
But I get that that's not necessarily as common
for adults. But, again, for kids, like, that
is the expected thing to give them. Yeah, yeah,
it's just common. Okay, my next one is when my
toddler and my baby are crying at the same time.
And I know this is, it's like a personal pet
peeve. Yeah. Mostly because I just, I feel like
I get really frazzled and I don't know what to
do. And that's just, yeah, I think that's like
a pet peeve. Like when I'm solo parenting for
the day. Yeah. And both are crying and. It's
super overwhelming. Yeah. And I feel like I try
to, like I try to tend to my toddler first. I've
read like. That is, it shows them that you're
not like picking the baby over them because they're
like more aware of all the situation. So I try
to tend to him first, but then I like feel like
I'm neglecting. My baby, in a sense, because
I'm always choosing my toddler first in that
situation, and I feel bad. Yep. And so... The
other thing I've heard is to tend to the fastest
fix first. Oh, okay, yeah. So if it's, like,
I mean, and this is, like, a bad example because
it's still be Colt, but, like, if Colt just wants
a snack, like, you can grab a snack and give
it to him in, like, three seconds versus, like,
nursing crews is going to take however long.
15 minutes, whatever. Yeah. Yeah, so I've heard
that, too, which I was like, oh, especially as
they get older and, like, that starts to matter
a little bit, the, like, who you pick first.
I actually really like that, yeah. And, like,
especially when you're frazzled, that's super
helpful because you're like, okay, one person
is going to stop crying. Yeah. I don't know if
it's, like, a me problem, but I get so frazzled
in those situations sometimes that I just don't
know what to do. So then I'm just like. It's
tough, yeah. I just end up doing nothing for
a second because I'm just like, I don't know
what to do. Yeah, no, I feel that, too. Yeah.
Yeah. Okay, what's your next one? All right,
my next one is when one of my kids is either
hurt or just crying and someone else is holding
them and won't give them back to me. Honestly,
it drives me crazy when Stuart does this, but
he's... You're like, okay, you're a parent too.
You're like, I guess as dad, you have the right
to take care of your kid too. But yeah, so it
even drives me crazy when Stuart does it, but
especially when it's someone who's not Stuart.
And I know there are always just like trying
to help. You know, it's not like anyone's trying
to like keep my kid away from me. They're trying
to like come. for you know like Lloyd gets hurt
and they're trying to comfort him and take care
of him but there's this level for me where it's
like no like that's my job and yeah it's like
your motherly instinct I guess inside of you
because I totally feel the same way of like I
just think I can fix it quicker right and sometimes
it's even true like I've noticed there's been
a couple times when it's like one of the babies
is crying And like whoever has them can't calm
them down. And then they're with mom and they
calm down super fast. And yeah, there's just
like that attachment, I guess. Yeah. Sadly, sometimes
Michael and I will kind of use this to our advantage.
Like if Cole is having a big tantrum and we're
trying to get him out of the tantrum and Michael
will like try to pick him up and it it makes
it worse. But then if. Then he hands Colt over
to me. Tantrum stops immediately. There you go.
You've just like, you figured out the trick,
I guess. I'm like, I don't know if we're really
teaching him anything good here, but like if
the tantrum is like in a poor place, like we
just got to move on. Yeah. And that almost works
every single time. That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah.
I know. I don't know what it is. but hey it works
yeah okay my next one this is a huge pet peeve
of mine when colt or when my toddler says he's
all done with eating and I've just started eating
and then I'm like okay now I gotta I can't sit
here and eat anymore we try to make Lloyd sit
for a little bit yeah that's smart I mean obviously
there comes a point where it's like you're still
a toddler and you have, like, you're not going
to sit for super long. But usually if he says
he's all done, we'll be like, well, mom and dad
are still eating, so why don't we wait a minute?
Because half the time he keeps eating then anyways.
That's smart. Not always, but half the time he'll
be like, oh, well, we're still sitting here,
so I might as well eat more. I probably need
to do that more. I think that I've run into so
many times where, like, he says he's all done
and I'm like, oh, mom's still eating. And then
it's like. he freaks out yeah yeah and then he'll
even like the other day he chucked his plate
on the ground that had so much food on it still
and then i was like take a deep breath okay okay
buddy we're yep okay mommy's all done right now
that's not how we handle our food yeah okay yeah
yeah yeah okay what's okay my next one is that
the only two options seemingly for moms is either
Sad beige mom or the, like, 90s primary colors.
Like, there are thousands of beautiful colors
in this world. Why are those – those are only
two options for kids' stuff and for, like, mom's
stuff. Yeah. Like, I painted Lloyd's room with,
like, a mountain mural and it's very colorful.
But none of them are – none of the colors are,
like, traditional, like, baby colors. So I'm
like, why can't this just be more of a thing?
I know. Why can't toys be more aesthetically
pleasing? Yeah. I completely agree with you.
I'm like, I was one of those moms where I thought
I'd be like the fully beige mom. And then as
you just, I don't know, as I get into it, I'm
like, I can't. You start to get like the toys
that they like actually like and stuff. And I
go, I guess. I guess we're doing all the bright,
bright colors. Yep. Yeah. Okay, my next one is
how much of a light sleeper I've become. Like,
I've never been a heavy sleeper by any means,
but after having kids, if they even, like, turn
in the crib or make a little, like, squeak or
anything like that, I feel like I'm, like, wide
awake. Then you can't get back to sleep. Yeah,
and especially, like, when Colt was a baby baby.
And I just felt like I was paranoid something
was going to happen in the night. So I felt like
any single noise, I was looking over at the bassinet
to make sure he was still breathing. I'd shine
my phone light on him to see. And then that would
wake him up. And I'm like, what am I doing? I've
just become such a light sleeper. The other side
of that, though, is I feel like I'm wide awake.
But then I actually can fall asleep pretty quickly
now. I think I can fall asleep. Faster now than
I used to be able to. Yeah. I used to lay there
for a long time and try to fall asleep and be
in my thoughts and stuff. And now I'm like, I
can usually fall asleep very quickly. Yeah. Yeah.
That is the one nice thing about sleep deprivation.
Yes. I know. Of how exhausted I am. When you
get the chance to sleep, usually. Usually you
can. You can. Yes. And you can sleep pretty hard.
Not every time. Sometimes it's still rough. Yeah.
Yep. I feel that. My next one is if you complain
about anything in motherhood, everyone just assumes
you hate being a mom. Yes. Yes. Which isn't true.
And, like, it's crazy because there are so many
other things in life that, like, if you complain
about one part of it, they're like, yeah, that
sucks. You know, like, if you complain about,
like, a piece of your job, no one assumes you
hate your job as a whole. But with motherhood,
you can be like, wow, I'm really tired because
I'm getting up three times a night. Yeah. Well,
that's motherhood. Yeah. Like, do you just not
like me? No, I love my kids. It's actually the
joy of my life. I'm also just very tired and
would like to take a nap. Yeah. Yeah. I know.
I think there should be. I think that's such
a stigma of like, you're not supposed to complain
in motherhood. And, like, I get also you don't
want to go to the other extreme where all of
a sudden you're complaining about everything
to the point where you're losing the joy of motherhood.
Yeah. But just, like, having, like, complaints
every once in a while or frustrations, like,
doesn't mean you hate everything. No. It's just,
like, sometimes it's a hard day. Yeah. And just,
like, if you weren't a mom, you'd have a hard
day and no one would think twice about it, you
know? Mm -hmm. That's so true. Okay. My next
one is laundry. And I know I'm pretty sure I've
talked about this multiple times on the podcast,
but laundry is my biggest pet peeve and it's
only growing. I hate doing laundry. Like if I
could pay someone to come do my laundry for me,
I think it'd be an easy sell. It really would
because the laundry in our house is so neglected.
Thankfully, we have like enough clothes to. really
probably make it work for a couple weeks without
doing laundry but if I neglect the laundry like
if I don't do one consistent load of laundry
almost every single day it just stacks up so
quickly and I'm like how the heck are we going
through so many clothes yeah so many towels sheets
all the things it just it never ends and I hate
that it's a chore that never ends that is yeah
it's like never satisfying because there's always
something yeah Also, Zayda keeps farting, so
I don't know what's picked up on the mic. I heard
that one. Yes. I love it. Good job. Yeah. Laundry,
I can usually get all of it washed in one day.
Yeah. But then it sits in a basket. And any time
I'm able to get it folded in the same week, I'm
like, wow, that took so little time. Yeah. It's
really the putting it away for me. Yeah. I think
that step is the hardest part for me is the like,
okay, I'll fold it. You just like throw it in
and walk away and that's not a big deal. Yeah.
And that actually makes me feel really good when
I'm like switching something over to the dryer.
I'm like, it's a little bit like dopamine. Yes.
I like check something off the list, but then
it's like, yeah, that's the putting it away.
So I have, I think right now I have like three
loads of laundry that are all clean, ready to
go. I just need to put them away. And I just
can't seem to find the energy to do it. One thing
I heard that I was like super judgy of at first
and then I started doing it is for baby clothes,
just don't fold them. Yes. Okay. I've seen so
many things about that recently. And I was like
super judgy at first because with Lloyd, I always
folded all of his clothes. And then one day I
like looked in his drawer and realized that even
when I fold it, nothing's folded in the drawer
because you're looking for like the one onesie
that you want to put on him or whatever. And
you move everything around and then everything
gets unfolded. So after that, I was kind of like,
oh. nothing's folded in his drawer anyways, so
why am I taking the time? And especially for
stuff like pajamas, too. You know, there are
some shirts and stuff that are worth, you know,
you want to keep it looking nicer or whatever.
So for the kids' clothes, I don't fold it. I
just throw it in their drawers, and that has
made a huge difference. That has changed your
life. Yeah, that's so smart. I haven't gotten
to that point yet. I love the idea behind it.
And I've also seen like when your kids get a
little bit older, having like specific laundry
baskets for them where you just like you throw
the clothes in and then they have to like they
can fold it if they want or they can like they
can put it pretty much wherever they want. Right.
And I like that idea, too, of like having them
do a little bit of the cleanup as well. Yeah.
Yeah. Laundry. Laundry is going to be the death
of me. I feel it. I think it's going to happen.
One of the, again, that's one thing I think actually
for me, I think it'd be dishes. If I could hire
someone to do one thing, it'd be dishes. I could
probably do laundry if I didn't have to worry
about dishes. Okay. My next one is people doing
things that they're trying to be helpful, but
it's like kind of not in their responsibility
to do and not in a situation like if it's a safety
thing and you're like making sure my kid doesn't
get hurt. Totally different. Right. Like super
appreciative. But, like, if I don't really know
you and you're trying to, like, help my kid with
their water or, you know, something like that
where it's, like – Yep. It just – I guess it's,
like, a boundary thing where it's, like, you're
kind of overstepping a boundary. Like, you didn't
offer to help. You just, like, tried to step
up, which, like, it makes me sound just so ungrateful
when I say that. But then there's, like, different
levels of it, too, where there's times when it's,
like, you're not the parent. So, like – This
isn't really your role unless I ask you to do
X, Y, or Z. Yeah. So people like who I know the
heart is good. They're like trying to be helpful
and be supportive. But when it's like this isn't
your job right now. Yeah. And I didn't ask you
to do it. Yeah. And again, like if it's a safety
issue, that's totally different. I, you know.
Do you find yourself like trying to. correct
the situation in the moment or are you just like
kind of watch and like I think it depends on
who it is it's like if it's someone I don't know
as well then I think it's easier to be like oh
like generally they're not doing anything huge
and I can just be like oh he doesn't need help
with that or you know I got it or whatever I
think if it's someone I know better, that's almost
harder to correct them then because there's a
relationship there that you care about and you
don't want that to be like a point of tension.
Especially if they like have kids themselves
or have raised kids. Right. You're like, they,
I mean, they have some knowledge. Right. And
I'm not even necessarily correcting you because
you're doing something wrong. You're just doing
something, maybe not doing something the way
that we're going to do it or something like that.
Yeah. So I think if it's someone I'm closer to,
it does depend on the situation where I kind
of like weigh it like. Is this worth bringing
up? And sometimes it is. It's like, hey, this
is a boundary that is, you know, not okay for
you to cross. And here's why. And then other
times I kind of just have to be like, okay. Yeah.
You know, I just need to. get over myself maybe
isn't even the right way to put it but just like
yeah let it go like this isn't as big of a deal
as i'm making it my head as long as it's not
hurting my child right or if it like not life
-altering right or if it comes up consistently
then i might say something like hey you know
this isn't how we're doing things or like i appreciate
that you're trying to help whatever yeah but
if it's like a one -time thing then it's not
a big deal yeah yeah Okay, my last one is kind
of more on the serious side, like a pet peeve,
internal pet peeve, is that I feel like I still
maybe don't know who I am. I know it's like the
hormonal shift and everything like that and just
becoming a mother, but you're almost expected
to get back to like your normal routine and normal
life, work, everything. And life is just different.
And like my mindset is just different. Who I
am is different, but the world has stayed the
same, I guess. And there's not really anything
I can do about it, I don't think, other than
the fact that it's just frustrating to me. Do
you feel like it was worse this time than it
was with Colt? No. Yeah. No, I think the first,
like, going from zero to one was worse because
it just was an entire life shift. Yeah. And then,
like... I had a C -section, so that was just
like a long recovery. And the hormonal drop was
like something I'd never experienced before.
And then you just, like my husband only had two
weeks of paternity leave. And so it just was
a huge, everything changed. Right. And so in
that I was like, it almost was like an identity
crisis, I feel like. Yeah. And I don't know if
you felt that at all, but like. I, yeah, I really
was like, what the heck? Like, who even am I?
And this time around, I'm like, oh, I'm, I know
who I am. Like, I know I'm a mom, like, but I'm
also a person on my own too. So I know that in
my mind, it's still just like, I don't know,
hormones are wild. For sure. Yeah. Yeah. It's
all up and down. And I, I think that's still
like four months in, hormones are still kind
of all over the place. Yeah, I know there's,
like, more and more studies that show the six
-week thing is, like, kind of just BS, and the
hormonal shift happens for, like, almost two
years. Yeah. Which neither of us even got there
before we had a second, so here we are. Okay,
my last one is people assuming Zeta's a boy.
Now, I don't put her in super girly clothes,
but I also don't put, unless we're, like, At
home, I'll put her in Lloyd's old pajamas or
whatever. But, like, if we go in public, I don't
put her in, like, masculine or boyish clothes.
But it's a lot of, like, gender -neutral stuff.
And I don't mind if people ask. I get it. Newborns
all look pretty. You know, even just under a
year, babies all kind of look the same, and it's
hard to tell if they're a boy or girl. That's
fine. But I've had a couple times when people,
like, very confidently have, like, said she's
a boy without asking, without, like, Do you say
something? Are you like, she? Yeah, we'll usually
correct them. No, there was one time in particular
that it was at church, and there were two people
we didn't know, and one of them asked, and the
other one was like, oh, that's a boy. Like, answered
for? Yeah, I was like, I've never even met you
before. That's so funny. And you were very confidently
saying that this is the boy. Oh, my gosh. So
I don't mind if people ask. Again, I get babies
look the same. Yeah. And again, I don't put her
in lots of like pink or anything like that. No,
she's wearing a cute little lemon outfit right
now. Yeah. I have a story to that too. So one
time we went to, I think it was Chili's. We went
to Chili's and Colt was probably like seven months
old or something like that. And he was in his
car seat. We like carried him in, go up to the
hostess and like say like two plus baby. What
was so funny is that not only did she get his
gender wrong, she said, does she need a kid's
menu? And it's clearly. The amount of times I've
had people ask that when Lloyd is like a baby.
Yeah. It's crazy. I'm like, no, no, we don't.
Yeah. Like still in the car seat, sleeping soundly.
Also, you just called him a girl and we just
had a. Great chuckle about it. Yeah. Yeah, I
usually don't get offended. I'm just annoyed.
Like, come on. Again, at least just ask. That's
fine. I know. It's not an offensive thing to
be like, sorry, is your baby a boy or a girl?
Yeah. Yeah. I actually had the pediatrician,
too. One of the pediatricians that we don't normally
see ask me if Cruz was a girl. And I was like,
oh, no, like, he's a boy. And he was like, oh,
well, he's a very beautiful boy. Thank you. I
was like, I think that's a compliment. It's a
weird thing to say, but yes. Yeah. Did you have
any more pet peeves you wanted to add in? The
one other one I think I can share is when people
act like they know my kids better than me. Does
this happen to you ever? Uh -huh. Where people
will be like, oh, like, he... He likes this.
Yeah. Yeah. Or something like that. Like, I know
my... I spend 24 -7 with my kids. Yes. Like,
I never have a... I mean, that's not true. I
do get breaks. But... Yeah. I spend more time
with my kids than literally anyone else. Mm -hmm.
Mm -hmm. You don't have to, like, explain things
to me about them. I think the hardest part is
when people, like, tell me something that I know
isn't true. They'll be like, oh, people always
say that, like, that Lloyd likes to be the center
of attention, which I know isn't true because
he gets super, like, closed up when he is the
center of attention. Unless he's around family,
that's a little bit different. But, yeah, they're
like, oh, he just likes to be the center of attention.
Like, no, he doesn't. I watch him every day.
Yeah. Like, I see how he changes around people.
Like, no, he doesn't. He really doesn't. He is
shy. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, you've seen him. He doesn't
perform. No, he doesn't. When you tell him to
say something, he's going to say it on his own
terms. He's not going to just do it. Yep. Well,
cool. Thanks for listening to all of our pet
peeves. We'd love to hear what your guys' pet
peeves are in motherhood. I know we're kind of
like at that toddler baby stage, but I know a
lot of our listeners are like, you know, in the
teen stage. Yeah. But we'd love to hear some
pet peeves of yours. So we'll post on our stories
the week that this comes out. Have you guys let
us know what your pet peeves are. Yeah, you can
share some of those. Yeah. Well, do you want
to share your win of the week? Sure. So we pray
before bedtime every night. And lately, Lloyd
will hold Zeta's hand during prayers. And it's
the cutest thing in the whole world. I love that.
She doesn't really care about holding his hand
yet because she doesn't really know how to use
her hands yet. Yeah. But he tries to hold her
hand, and so he'll hold my hand and hold Zeta's
hand, and Stuart holds Lloyd, and it's so cute
and so sweet. I love that. What about you? Okay,
my win. So Cruz just started rolling over, and
it actually happened. It was such a win. So we
went on a trip to California to visit our families,
and he rolled over for the first time at my mom's
house. And she just was like, it just was so
exciting that it happened there. And it was also
so exciting that he's like, he did that. But
also like just the timing of it. And it was like
we were saying goodbye to my mom and my stepdad
because we were leaving the next day. And then
he just like rolled over and it was just really
cute. Yeah, it was just good timing. And also
I'm like sad that he's growing up so fast. I
don't know. It felt like a big milestone. I don't
know. Zeta's been sitting up like assisted. Oh,
nice. We've been able to put her in like, we
have a different brand, but like the bumbo seat
kind of thing. And the first time I put her in
it, I was like, oh, she's going to last like
a minute and a half and then get so mad. And
that's fine. But she sat in it for like 15 minutes
the first time I put her in it. steward a picture
he's like no she's not old enough to be in that
yet like what the heck that's it's impossible
she's just our little tiny baby i know guess
it's time to have another one i guess so all
right well thank you so much for listening like
we said we'll put a comment box in our stories
this week so you can share your pet peeves and
we can maybe share some of those on instagram
yeah thank you for listening Rate, review, subscribe,
and like us on Instagram or follow us on Instagram.
And we will see you next week. See you next week.